Envy and Manipulations
by rrabbit
Summary: Sixteen year old Ginny Weasley has her first summer job at the Folk Hills Country Club, the most prestigious high society club in the wizarding world. When Draco Malfoy comes home from his summer internship at the Ministry of Magic things get complicated.
1. Chapter 1

"Here's your purse Mrs. Green. Have a great day!" I smile at the snooty woman in the green dress as she takes her designer purse from me. She doesn't even bother to acknowledge my existence as she slings it over her shoulder and unzips the top. She stands there, still ignoring me, as she digs through it to take out her aviator sunglasses that she places on the bridge of her nose. She looks like some sort of alien with them on and I hide a smile at my mental comparison. "Have a good one!" I say and she doesn't even glance at me.

She never tips and I despise her for it. If I have to put up with her foul attitude the least she could do is pay me for it.

As soon as she walks away, I slump my shoulders and rest my elbows against the counter as I try to shift my weight from foot to foot to relieve the pressure from the balls of my feet. After a few moments, I sigh and put my chin in my hands to wait for the next person to come up as my feet throb and ache. These heels really kill me. I honestly have no idea why I'm made to follow that particular rule of the dress code considering I just stand behind this stupid counter all day.

I send a glance down to my brown bag and resist the urge to open it up and take my note book out. I'm at work, I can't get it right now. It's against the rules.

I straighten up immediately when a couple approaches and I put on my best smile as a tall willowy brunette puts her large bag on the counter. "Hello, Mrs. Randolf," I say, knowing her name because she comes here every freaking day.

She's wearing a sun dress and a string of pearls with a large straw hat on her head to protect her from the actual sun. Spray tans are in season this summer and I have to say they fit all of the fake personalities these people have as well. She smiles at me, showing bleached white teeth and I sigh in envy because of her perfect, flawless skin. I know she has to be older than she looks, though. She was a model when she was younger and married a rich man. Every little girl's dream….

I roll my eyes at that thought.

"How are you two doing this afternoon?" I say as I glance at her husband. I hate Mr. Randolf. He's a surgeon at St. Mungo's and he always looks like he's terribly late for an important meeting.

"Oh, I'm fine, Ginny dear," she says kindly. I know her politeness isn't really genuine, but then again, neither is mine. "Benny and I are going to go out to the golf course in a little bit so I wanted to leave my pool things with you," she says as I take the bag and grab a ticket for her. "You know they have that half blood out there cleaning the dunes all the time. You never know what they'll do."

I feel my insides cringing at her comment, but I try to keep my facial expression neutral. She's talking about Seamus Finnigan. Working here is his summer job as well. "Well, I'll keep it safe for you," I smile brightly again, keeping my disgust at her ignorance at bay. "Have Fun!" I tell her as I hand her a ticket. She takes it, and as we pass hands, she hands me a coin. See. Mrs. Randolf tips.

"You're so pretty, Ginny," she says like she knew me and I inwardly roll my eyes as I take the coin and put it in my pocket with the other minimal tips I received today.

Out of all the members, she's the only one that has conversations with me, besides the old men who like to hit on me of course, but they hardly count.

"I have no idea why they keep you cooped up in this box all day," she says as she looks around my little bag and cloak check out station with a crinkling nose. "You should see the beasts they have waitressing now." She makes a face and I sigh. All she cares about are outward appearances, other peoples as well as her own. It's kind of sad in a way. "It's always nice to eat with a pleasant face around. Wouldn't you say, Ben?" she looks towards her husband who checks his watch and nods his head. It looks like he cares about this conversation as much as I do. "Oh well, see you later then."

"Bye. Be careful out there, I hear it's supposed to rain soon," I say as I wave her off and slump my shoulders again once she's out of seeing range.

This place is so boring, but it's the first real job I've ever had and I'm proud to say that I've been saving every coin from my paycheck. I first heard about this place from Luna Lovegood during the end of the school term while we were on the train. I was complaining about finding a summer job that would pay well… well, as in more than the minimum wage normally given to underage witches during the summer, and Luna suggested this place.

I need the money. I'm saving up for a special writer's workshop I want to take next summer where famous authors attend and teach small workshops. I've been fantasizing about it since I was fourteen, when I found out that I knew without a doubt that I wanted to be a writer, but of course the retreat is terribly expensive and something that was totally out of my parent's price range. I've been saving every bit of money that I had acquired for three years to afford it but I'm still really far off. That's why I jumped at the chance when Luna mentioned Folk Hills.

The Folk Hill country club is the most prestigious and renowned private clubs in the wizarding world. Only the most famous and rich families are allowed to be members…. And you have to be pureblooded... I thought that it would be illegal to deny membership to such a place because of blood status, but Luna said that there's so much money at Folk Hills that it doesn't even matter so I put aside my personal beliefs and applied anyways. Besides, Dean Thomas and Seamus both work at the club so I knew it couldn't be so terrible. Seamus works on the golf course, doing god knows what, and Dean works as a life guard at the pool. They like it well enough, but the only thing they said that bothered them was the whole 'status' ribbons we're told to wear.

During my interview, a very stern black woman named Del asked me the typical applicant questions… why do you want to work here, what are your strengths, do you have any experience… but one question in particular kind of stopped me for a moment. She asked me what my blood status was. That was another thing that I thought was illegal. That was a question an employer shouldn't be able to ask… or care about… when hiring a person and when I voiced my concern over it she looked me straight in the eye and gave me a solid answer.

"Miss Weasley," she had said with her coal eyes burning into mine. "I am going to be completely honest with you. A majority of the members here are prejudice bastards." I blinked a few times at the admission, but she kept going anyways despite my surprise. "It's safer if they know up front what status you are. There's been trouble in the past," she said seriously.

I didn't ask her what that meant and we moved on after that. My first day I was fitted with a blue ribbon to wear around my wrist just in case any one of the members wanted to know that I was pure of blood and Del gave me a whole handful of them, just in case I happened to lose one. Luna wears blue as well but Seamus and Dean have to wear yellow just to let others know that they both have one parent that's a muggle. It's so stupid, but I've never actually seen anyone get in trouble over it. I mean, the parents of the rich kids don't seem to mind that it's a half blood saving their lives from drowning. It's just the hurtful comments here and there that are bothersome, but I've learned to tune them out. I've only seen a few red bracelets to show off the muggle borns, though. I only see them in the kitchens, out of the public view.

My main goal was to get hired on at the restaurant as a waitress. That's what Luna does and she makes a small fortune in tips during the night that she uses to pay for her odd hobbies, like snorkel hunting and toad grass collecting. Unfortunately there were no open spots, so Del put me at the bag and cloak checkout counter and told me to be pleasant and smile a lot.

"Rich people will tip you if you're kind," she said as she showed me the ropes, how to work the desk and do the tickets. "And especially if you're pretty, so just keep on smiling and you'll do just fine."

It kind of made me feel like a prostitute, but hey, all I had to do was hang up a few cloaks and watch a few purses. I make decent money doing it. More than I would at any other summer job that most teenagers tend to get and when the tips are good I dare say I could work at this place all year long without complaint. I've officially gotten over the shock of seeing the famous and rich people that litter the news papers with their photo's and now the whole thing is quite jaded for me.

These heels really are killing me.

I slip out of them and my feet sigh in relief as I wiggle my toes and let the cool marble floor cool my aches. The dress code for the staff is ridiculous here as well. All the men working inside the buildings have to wear suits and ties and all of the women have to wear skirts and, at least, two inch heels. I didn't have many skirts or dresses at the beginning of the summer, but my Mom took me out shopping right before I started and we picked out a lot of pretty fabric so she could make some for me. It's cheaper than buying it off the hanger and I like the way my Mom makes my clothes. She knows exactly how to fit me and she's quite good at it. I look down at the white dress with the red roses on it and run my fingers over the fabric. Yes, I would take my Mom's homemade dresses over the designer ones I see all these rich women wearing any day.

A half hour passes without me seeing a soul so I send a furtive look around the hall before getting my bag and digging out my note book. I love writing. It really calms me down and when I open my notebook to my marked spot, I carefully run my fingers over the pages. I would die if this was lost or stolen just because I've put so much time and investment in it. I could never keep a diary… my life is not nearly that interesting, but I can create worlds with a pen and I love it entirely. I pull out a writing utensil and go back to the short story I had been working on the past couple of days. It's a scary one about a haunted house and sometimes at night I even get chilled by my own thoughts for it.

I love it.

I start writing, with the ink against the page as I map out what I want my characters to do. John, my main character, has a funny feeling as he takes a shower. Something doesn't feel right and it's making him nervous. He tries to ignore the prickling sensation on the back of his neck as he washes his hair and lets the warm water pound down on his back. He feels like he's being watched and he chastises himself for being such of a wimp. He hears a noise and his insides freeze, so he quickly turns off the water and listens for it again. Nothing. A nervous flutter starts in his stomach as he pulls the shower curtain back to reveal his empty bathroom. He sighs in relief, but the noise happens again, like a chair scrapping across a wooden floor. He quickly ties the towel around his hips and he leaves the bathroom, leaving wet footprints on the wood floor as he looks down the dark hallway.

Turn on the lights, he thinks, as he fumbles around in the dark. Weren't they turned on before? He goes for the light switch, but before he can turn them on, a door at the end of the hallway creeps open. John swallows the knot in his throat and stares at the darkness for a lifetime before taking a shy step towards the open attic…

"Are you going to help me, or do I have to stand here all day?"

I jump and the pen flies out of my hand as I snap my eyes to the owner of that voice. Words literally leave me as I stare at him in shock and my heart is pounding in my chest. I was so focused on the story that I didn't even hear him approach.

"Um," was all I could come up with as his stormy eyes glared into mine. I had rarely seen anyone I knew actually come to my little area and that was throwing me off.

I've seen Pansy Parkinson in passing as she went out to the pool with her younger sister Ivy and a few of her friends…. And I've seen Cho Chang with her mother once when I was entering the building… but Draco Malfoy… I just wasn't prepared to see him standing here. Not right now anyways. I knew his parents were members, I had seen his mother here playing tennis a few times, but I just… not him.

He raised an eyebrow as I tried to find the words I needed to say.

I shake my head and straighten up with a fake smile when I realize where I am and that he could get me fired. I can feel the blush creeping over my cheeks, but I ignore it. "What can I do for you?" I say in a fake nice voice as he unclasps his light rain cloak, revealing his blue polo and khaki slacks. The typical rich boy summer outfit.

Maybe he doesn't know who I am… I don't want him to realize I'm Ron's little sister because I know how mean he can be, so I put my head down slightly, hoping he won't notice. The last time I saw him was before we boarded the Hogwarts express to come home for the summer. Harry and Ron had always fought with Malfoy and his friends, but this last year seemed to have been more brutal than ever before.

Of course, Malfoy and his friends were always terrible to people. I remember Pansy Parkinson and Daphne Greengrass mercilessly bullied a hufflepuff girl to tears every day until she left school for a few months in my third year. I remember Blaise Zabini throwing out his foot to trip Hannah Abbot when she was walking down the hallway and I've seen Crabbe and Goyle get into more fist fights than is healthy… I knew they were mean, but Malfoy had become so hateful towards my brother and Harry that they started being just as hateful back. I could see a pleased little smirk on the corner of Draco's mouth every time my brother bad mouthed him, or every time Harry drew his wand. It was almost like he was pleased that he was able to make them stoop to his level.

I don't even know what the fight was about that day by the train… I don't know who started it, or why, but by the time I reached them, there was already a crowd gathered around to watch another blow out between my brother and Draco. I pushed through the crowd and saw my brother cursing up a storm at Draco, who stood across from him with his arms crossed and one of his delicate eyebrows raised. He looked mildly amused and my brother looked almost purple as Harry stood behind him with his brows forced together in anger.

"Are you done?" Malfoy had asked cruelly as he let his arms fall to his sides casually, even though I was sure he was just getting into position to draw his wand if he had to. "Even though that was quite entertaining, I have somewhere I need to be."

"You're an arrogant bastard, Malfoy," Harry said from behind my fuming brother and my eyebrows shot up because Harry rarely ever said things like that.

"Shut up, scarhead," Malfoy said dismissively. "You're not in this conversation."

"You're nothing but a rich prick, Malfoy," Ron seethed and Draco smirked again.

"At least I'm not poor," he said and Ron's ears burned. So did mine. "You're white trash, Weasley. You're whole family is. At least Potter's parents can provide for him and they're dead. You're parents are just lazy free loaders…."

That struck a nerve and Ron lunged at Malfoy with the intent to harm. Ron always let his anger get the best of him and he could never control his magic properly when he was angry so he always resorted to muggle methods. Draco drew his wand and I covered my mouth as he pointed it at my brother's throat stopping him from the punch he was going to throw.

"Don't even think about _fucking_ touching me," Draco said in a hissed whisper and I felt a chill go down my spine. I had never heard his voice sound like that… I had never seen his face look so hard. "Step away from me," he said and Ron must have seen the seriousness in his expression because he did just that. "Don't ever come near me again or I will kill you."

Teachers came a few moments later to break up the fight, but the murderous look in Malfoy's eyes still chills me when I think about it. He's dangerous and there' is something infinitely dark about him. I shake my head to rid it of the disturbing memory and I focus on the expectant gaze of Draco Malfoy once more. I'm an employee and he is a paying patron. He could very well ruin this for me if he found out who I was and made work miserable for me.

And he probably would. He's a jerk like that.

I know that, so I keep smiling.

"I think the answer to that is obvious," he says snidely as he hands me the green cloak. It's wet and I realize that it must have started raining. My warning to Mrs. Randolf was justified. "Isn't this your job?"

I blush and nod my head, glad that he doesn't seem to recognize who I am. "Let me put this away and get a ticket for you," I tell him as I grab a hanger for his cloak.

I go to one of the oak lockers and put it inside; taking the ticket that pops out once it's locked. I feel his intense eyes on me the entire time and I start to become uncomfortable by it. Why is he staring at me so intently anyways? "Where's Nadia?" he ask and I jump again because his deep voice seems so out of place here… with me.

"W-What?" I ask as I drop his ticket. I don't even bother looking at him as I quickly pick it up.

"The woman who used to work here…. Where is she?"

"Oh," I say as I look down at my fingers that are fiddling with his ticket. "She still works here…She doesn't come in until four, though," I answer as I walk back towards him, realizing mid step that I'm not wearing my shoes, and I curse myself inwardly because Malfoy, of all people, has seen me break so many rules already. I look up to him shyly to gage his reaction and I feel my heart panic because he's turned my notebook around and has his head bent towards the page.

He's _reading_ it.

I don't even let my best friend read my stories!

I inhale deeply and scurry over to him. "Here you go," I say in a fake chirpy voice as I thrust the ticket at him and close the notebook so he can't look at it anymore. "Have a good day." I say as I slide it back towards me.

I jump again when he slams his hand on top of it as well to stop me from moving it back in my bag where it belongs. "Writing on the job?" he says and when I look at him again I see that sadistic smirk curling at the corner of his mouth.

Damnit.

I've seen him give that look before.

I don't even want a tip from him. I just want him to go away, but he doesn't move. He just stands there, staring at me as my nails dig into the top of my most treasured possession.

"I'm…" I don't know what I want to say. I know I can't be mean to him and I know I can't use my wand or anything. I just want him to let go of my freaking notebook. "I'm sorry," I end up saying and it sounds weird to me because I didn't mean it and I didn't really want to apologize to him.

He's going on my hate list as well.

He surveys me for the longest time and it was starting to worry me. Working here had made me nearly invisible, or that's how it felt at least, and I was comfortable with that. When you work at jobs like this, most of the people are rude and ignore you and the few that do talk to you don't really give a damn who you are anyways, but he was staring at me. He was downright _staring_ and studying as he let his sharp eyes dance across my face and body. I felt myself blushing again and for the first time since I started here I was all too aware of my homemade clothes and cheap jewelry. Why did he have to look at me like that? Did he stare at everyone like that just to make them uncomfortable?

"Please give it back," I plead and I hate that I'm begging but I'm feeling odd and out of place and I just want my damn notebook. He taps his fingers against the card board cover as I look at the logo on his blue polo. Name brand. Of course.

He lets go and I take the opportunity to get the notebook and hold it against my chest like a child holding a doll. I feel pathetic and I'm just waiting for him to say something mean to me.

I need him to go away now.

"I've seen you before," he says and I was glad that he wasn't able to place me. In fact, I almost sighed in relief. "What's your name?" he asks as he eyes the blue ribbon on my wrist with mild curiosity. I almost wish I had a yellow ribbon now, or even a red one so he wouldn't even bother to speak to me. "I can easily find out your name if you don't tell me, of course," he says. He must have caught onto my distress.

I wasn't going to lie to him, though. I needed to not let this get to me… I was being silly about the whole thing. He was just a person too so I gather my courage and look at him. "Ginny," I answer and he looked thoughtful for a second.

"Ginny," he repeated and it sounded odd on his lips. He eyed me again and I felt brave enough to meet his eyes as he studied my face.

Then it happened.

I could see the recognition light up his eyes and I was waiting for the snide comment or the hurtful jab, but none came. When I saw him reach into his pocket, my eyes went wide with unjust fear because I thought he was going to hex me with his wand, but instead he pulled out a few coins and put them on the counter.

"I've just decided something," he says quietly to himself and I raise an eyebrow as he looks me over. He nods his head like he was sure of it and then he finds my eyes again. "See you later, Ginny," he says flatly.

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding and I look down at the two gallons he left on the counter top. It felt wrong to take them. It felt dirty for some reason. I didn't want his money because I knew he was probably going to make fun of me for working here, for serving him, or something like that and the more I thought about it, the angrier I got. I took the stupid coins and put them on the floor, kicking them under the counter so I wouldn't have to look at them.

"Ginny?" I jump again and place my hand over my heart as I look at Nadia. She's the other girl who works the checkout counter that Draco Malfoy had asked about. She's a halfblood in her early twenties who already has three kids to feed and is only working here to find a rich husband… or lover to take care of her. That's what she says at least "Are you ready to go home?" she says as she takes off her rain cloak.

"Oh," I say and I blink a few times, still stuck with that weird encounter with Draco Malfoy.

He stresses me out.

"I didn't realize…." I checked the clock on the wall and my mouth turned up in a pleased smile. This shift went fast. "I get to go home!" I would have done a happy dance if my pride would have allowed it. Nadia stepped behind the counter as I put on my shoes and packed up my bag, stuffing my tips in the front pocket where I usually keep them.

"How has your day been?" Nadia asks as I scurry to get myself together so I can get out of here.

"Pretty good," I say quickly as I find my own rain cloak and clasp it around my neck. It's an old brown plaid one of my mother's that we've had for ages. "How are the kids?" I ask as I spare her a little glance.

Nadia is a little woman of a slight build and she always looks tired and worn out. The poor thing. She nods her head as she takes off her rain boots and slips into some dangerously high stilettos that make her charming outfit look a bit risqué. She gets more tips than I do because of her outfits and how she flirts with the men here. I'm embarrassingly bad at it…. Not that I would want to flirt with any of these pompous peacocks anyways.

"They're fine. Jimmy has a bit of a cold… odd for this time of year…"

"Oh, that's terrible," I say in mock sympathy as I sling my bag over my shoulder. "Bye then!"

I leave quickly, knowing that if I stay I'll have to hear everything about Jimmy's little cold and I'd prefer to go home rather than listen to that. Luna was waiting for me just outside the back entrance of the building in the tight black dress and tights all the waitresses in the dining hall were made to wear. I eyed her wearingly because she looked pleased and I was not in the mood to deal with pleasantness after my day.

"Good shift?" I ask when I reach her and she smiles at me. Luna, for as weird as she is, she really is a beautiful girl with her long blond hair and light round eyes. I find myself jealous of her way more than is healthy.

"It was a good one," she says in that light voice of hers as we start walking towards the apparation point. "I fear I can't say the same about you," she says. She watches me with a tilted head as we walk down the concrete walk way in these uncomfortable bloody shoes.

"Not really," I say with a shrug. I tie my hair back into a bun as we pass under the concrete passage. I tell her about the odd encounter with Draco Malfoy and she eyes me oddly as I throw up my hood. Rain starts to pelt us once we leave the safety of the passage and I feel my body shiver.

"He ate at the restaurant with a few of his friends," she says when we reach the blue sign that indicates a safe app zone. "There were about five of them."

"Was he in your section?" I ask as I take out my wand. Why do I care?

She shakes her head. "I guess he's dating Cho Chang now." An odd ripples runs through my body at that and I frown. "From what I heard in passing, he was completing an internship at the Ministry at the beginning of the summer," she says as she situates her purse. The waitresses know the gossip on _everyone_ at the club. "Just got back and Chang was all over him."

I make a face at the mention of Cho. I've always kind of hated her for the little thing that happened between her and Harry. I know it's not fair, but sometimes you can't help hating the person that's better looking than you and who your crush ended up liking. It's a part of life. It doesn't help that she's impossibly nice as well. It makes me hate her all the more.

"Well, I'm just waiting for him to say something to me," I state bitterly and she raises her eyebrows.

"Why would he?"

"Because you know," I start lamely and she keeps up with that stupid raised eyebrow. "Well, because he hates my brother and all that…"

"He doesn't hate you though," she points out and I frown. She doesn't have any siblings. She doesn't realize the rules are that if a member of your family hates someone then it is your obligation to hate them as well. "And you said he didn't do anything bad to you."

"Yet," I state and she smiles like I was funny or something.

"Be optimistic," she says as she pats my shoulder. "By the end of the summer you'll have that money saved and you can go into our 11th year knowing that you'll finally be able to go to that workshop you've been dying for."

"Yeah," I say and then I sigh. "I just hate seeing people our age at this place," I say as I look back at the grand entrance building of the club, envy pooling in my stomach. What I'm saving up for the writing retreat is probably a weekly allowance for some of the girls here. "It just makes me feel bad."

"The only difference between them and us is that we have to make our own opportunities," she says and when I look at her I smile. "And we have better personalities," she says and I laugh.

I wave at Luna as she lifts her wand. "See you tomorrow!"

"Tood-a-loo!" she waves as I lift my wand and Apparate away as well.

* * *

Mom's in the kitchen when I get home and she smiles at me as I shake off the rain from my cloak.

"Did you have a good day at work?" she asks as I flick off the heels and thump my bag on the ground, unclasping the cloak as she whisks something in a bowl. It smells positively divine in here.

"Sure," I mumble because that's what I always say. I hang my cloak and turn to her. She's making dinner and my stomach growls so I take a seat at the table. "What are we having?" I ask as I grab an apple from the bowl in the center of the table, unable to wait. "I'm starving." I tell her as I munch into it.

"Oh, you know, the usual."

The usual?

I walk over to her and look over the pots on the stove. Mashed potatoes, green beans, freshly baked bread, corn, apple pie… I bend down to check the oven… there's some kind of meat roasting in there… Why is she making so much freaking food?

"Will you be a dear and get me the butter from the fridge?"

"Are Fred and George here?" I ask her and she shakes her head.

"The butter, Gin," she says and I furrow my brows.

I take another bite of my apple as I send her a suspicious look and then I walk over to the fridge and open it up. "Holy hell," I whisper as I take in all of the food wrapped in glass containers. The ice box is practically overflowing with food. "Jesus..." Wait…. All this food…. That means….

I forgo getting the butter as I drop my apple and run upstairs to my brother's room, taking the stairs two at a time. I pause a moment outside of the door to smooth out my dress and I bring my hands up to my hair. I make a face at the messy bun I had put it in and I take out the hair tie quickly and let my hair fall down past my shoulders. I brush it with my fingers to make sure it's in place and then I carefully knock on the door after doing a quick eyeliner check in the hallway mirror. No rain smudges for me.

"Eh, Mom, they're not hungry. Just back off a little, would you?"

"Ron, it's Ginny," I say and then I put my hand on the door knob and turn it until it pops open. Ron's sitting on the bed with an irritated look on his face as I step inside, but I look away from him because he's not who I want to see. Hermione is sitting on the chair, with a newspaper open on her lap and Harry… Harry is staring at me from his spot by the window. My heart clenches when I see him and I turn to Hermione who stands with a smile on her face. I've decided that I will no longer like Harry Potter in that way anymore… well, I won't let anyone know that I like him that way. My crush on him was starting to get pathetic and even Dean pointed it out when we were dating last year.

"I feel like I haven't seen you in months," I tell her as I run over with a grin on my face to give her a hug. Ron makes an annoyed noise, but I don't care because Hermione is my friend too. I crush her too me and laugh against her hair as she squeaks.

"Wow, Gin, you look pretty," she says as she stands back and looks at the dress my mother had made me.

I blush a little because she said that compliment in front of Harry, but I smile anyways. "Thanks. I just got off work… they make us dress up," I explain and I send a look to Harry out of the corner of my eyes. He was looking at me, but when he saw that I noticed, he snapped his eyes away. I cover my frown. Why would he do that? "How was your trip?" I ask as I focus back on my friend.

"It was—"

"Ginny, they haven't even been here an hour. Would you please go away so I can have some time with my friends? Okay? Thank you." Ron says hatefully and I blush again, my feelings hurt by his slight… but I understand and I nod my head.

"Sorry," I mutter as I walk towards the doorway. Normally I would fight him on this, but I'm getting older and I need to start acting like an adult. These are his friends first and foremost and I would hate it if he did this to me if the situations were reversed. "I'll see you guys later," I mutter and Hermione sends Ron a hateful look before glancing at me. "I should help my Mom set the table."

"I left my bags in your room already," she says and I nod my head as I make it to the doorway. "So don't be alarmed."

"I'll see you guys at dinner," I tell them and then I leave, closing the door behind me. I pause with my back against his door, letting out a long breath I didn't even realize I was holding. With a small smile I go down the stairs two at a time. This summer just got a whole lot more fun.

I go over to the fridge and get the butter out and I throw my discarded apple away as I make it to my mother. "Can I help with anything?" I ask, feeling much more energized now no matter how bitchy Ron is being about the matter. .

"I've got it covered, sweetheart," she says as she gives me a knowing smile. "Why don't you go change out of your work clothes and relax a bit before dinner? I'll call you down."

"Thanks," I tell her before kissing her cheek and running up the stairs to my room. Hermione's bags are in the corner and I smile at them again before running to my closet and stripping out of my dress. I go for my usual summer uniform: a pair of shorts and a tank top, and I put them on quickly before throwing myself down on my bed and staring up at my canopy.

I don't know why my happiness is always dictated by how close Harry Potter is to me. It's not like he's nice to me… well, I mean... it's not that he's_ not_ nice to me. He just doesn't talk to me… or acknowledge me most of the time. In fact, he's kind of like one of the patrons at Folk Hills… he's polite when he needs to be but under it all I doubt if he really cares. I just like having him around. He's handsome and he's the savior of the wizarding world for Christ sakes. If that's not good first crush material than I don't know what is… I shake my head and mentally scold myself. I forgot, I've decided not to crush on him anymore.

After a few moments I hear a knock on my door and I sit up as Hermione enters my room with the news paper under her arm. We stare at each other for a few moments and then she smiles as she runs over and hops on my bed. I love Hermione. Even though she's a bossy know it all, underneath it all she's a silly girl just like the rest of us.

"So, how has your summer been?" I ask as she lies beside me.

"Pretty good," she says with a shrug. "After being around magic, staying with my parents is really boring."

"I can imagine," I tell her with a smirk and then she turns on her side to prop her head up so she can look down at me.

"You want to know something?" she says and I glance at her from the corner of my eyes and nod my head. "After you left the room a little bit ago, Harry said it looks like you've gotten a haircut."

I furrow my brows. "I haven't gotten a hair cut since the last time I saw him," I admit and she grins at me and takes a strand of my hair.

"I know," she says slyly as she curls it around her finger. "But in Harry world, I think that's him noticing that you've grown up."

I feel a pleased smile curling my lips and I look up at the canopy again, wondering if that's possibly true. "It doesn't matter," I sigh even though I am happy. "I don't think I really like Harry like that anymore." I don't want her thinking I'm pining after him after all and even though she is my friend I know some of what I say has to get back to Harry. I don't want him thinking I'm still that pitiful girl who wants him.

The newspaper crunches against my bed as Hermione lays back against my pillows so I pull it away from her. "What are you reading?" I ask as I turn it so I can see.

"Oh, you know me, always keeping up on current affairs," she jokes as she tries to grab it from me.

"This is the society section," I tell her with an amused smile as I look over the gossip columns and paparazzi photos. "Current affairs indeed," I say as I turn the page.

"It's good to be knowledgeable about all things," she says. I stop when I see a picture of a group of girls dressed in white. "Ugh," Hermione's breath brushes my face. "Why is she in the paper?" she asks pointing to a picture of Pansy Parkinson who has white flowers in her hair as she smiles in a group of other girls her age, all upper class and all filthy rich.

"She's coming out soon I imagine," I say as I fold the paper over and let it fall to the floor, not wanting to see pictures of the girls I'll never be friends with living a life I'll never have.

"What does that mean?"

I scrunch up my nose. "It's stupid. When rich pureblooded girls turn seventeen they have to be 'introduced' into society so guys know they can be married or something like that," I say with a shrug as she frowns. "They have a ball for it and everything."

"How old fashioned," she says thoughtfully and I shrug.

"Stupid is what it is."

"Ron says we can go to Yellow Springs tomorrow," she says excitedly. "Do you want to come with us? I hear it is supposed to be beautiful in the summer."

I nod my head. "I would love to go."

My stomach growls loudly and we look at each other before she laughs.

"Let's go eat."

I spend the rest of the night trying not to stare at Harry Potter and trying not to notice that he's trying not to stare at me.

* * *

Yellow Springs is a posh little village located by a rather large and beautiful lake. Mostly it serves as summer retreat for those who can afford it and it has a nice boardwalk with fun shops, mechanical rides, and street entertainers that come specifically for the summer months. I'm a little excited to go actually. We didn't have a chance to go last year and I don't have to work.

"Where do you work?" Harry asks me as the four of us walk towards the village. It's about a twenty minute walk and I was happy that I spent time getting ready before we left considering Harry has taken it upon himself to walk uncomfortably close to me the entire time. "You mentioned… having a job?" he says awkwardly.

Hermione and Ron are a good deal ahead of us, arguing about something stupid and I squint my eyes against the sun beating down on us. It's a terribly hot today and I make a face because I'm sweating before reaching into my purse and pulling out a pair of sunglasses.

"Ginny?" Harry says softly to get my attention and my heart does a weird summer sault as he looks at me, the sun catching the green of his iris' in the most electrifying way. I swallow hard and look away quickly like a spaz, pushing my glasses further up on my nose. "Ron said you had a job?" he says uncomfortably again.

"Yeah," I say with a head nod and I glance at him. "All I do is baby-sit cloaks and purses so it's nothing to write home about."

"Hey," he says with a shoulder shrug as he stuffs his hands into his cargo shorts. "At least you're getting paid for it, right?"

"At least," I say with a little smile. I can't believe he's actually speaking to me unprovoked like this but how annoying because I've already decided I was done with him. A silent pause rests between us and I put my hands in the pockets of my shorts, matching his awkward movements as I try to think of something worthwhile to say. "How has your summer been going?" I settle on saying and he itches the back of his neck, a nervous gesture I've come to memorize. "Have you been having a good time at your Aunt and Uncle's?"

He clears his throat uncomfortably.

"It's been alright. You know my Aunt and Uncle are mental," he mutters bitterly and I furrow my brows before it dawns on me. Of course. His family has always been cruel to him and it was stupid of me to bring up. He had been miserable.

"I'm sorry," I say seriously and he looks at me again as we pass under the wrought iron sign that marks the Village of Yellow Springs. "I shouldn't have…"

"It's okay, Ginny," he says and he gives me a little smile. I blush scarlet and pretend to readjust my purse so I can avoid looking his way so he doesn't see it. "Not everyone has my situation."

"Ginny!" I snap my head away from Harry and look forward to Hermione as she waves me towards her. "Do you want some ice cream? I've been craving it all day."

Harry and I finally reach them as my brother rubs his stomach with a quaffel ball under one arm that he brought from home. "I'm hungry too," he says and Harry smiles.

"You're always hungry," he says and I laugh. He looks at me again and I could swear his cheeks turned a bit red… but it is really hot today…. I guess that must be why.

There was a street vender with a little ice cream stand not too far away from where we came in and we all had to practically jog to keep up with Ron's long strides. "I'll have a strawberry cone dipped in chocolate with sprinkles," he says to the stunned man in the paper hat.

As he starts to prepare the ice cream for my insistent brother, I open my purse and look at the money I grabbed for the trip. My tips from working yesterday are lying at the bottom along with my lip gloss and a few scraps of forgotten paper. I bite the inside of my cheek as I decide what I want to do while Hermione orders.

Do I _need_ ice cream right now?

I ate lunch before we came and I'm really not that hungry. I make my decision and sigh sadly as I close my purse. The more money I save, the quicker I'll reach my goal for the retreat.

"What would you like, Gin?" Hermione asks as she takes a lick from her chocolate cone. I look at it with envy and shake my head.

"I'm not hungry, really," I tell her as I kick a pebble with my sandal. Pouting at how practical I am. "I'm going to window shop as you guys get your stuff," I say as I start walking off by myself to get away from how delicious the ice-cream looks. It is a rather humid day today, and my hair is starting to curl because of it… a perfect day for ice cream. I gather my thick hair and grab my hair tie from around my wrist to put it up. My hair is way too thick to be down today anyways.

Ice cream would cool me down.

No. I need the money.

Ugh. I wish I was rich.

I walk towards the board walk so I can look in on the shops and I put my head down in thought as I bite the corner of my lip. The boardwalk is pretty crowded today, and I weave around the crowd of people as I walk aimlessly.

"Please, Ivy, you can't honestly think he really wanted to play chess when he invited you over."

I know that voice and I look up from my thoughts to see Pansy Parkinson and her little sister Ivy standing a few feet away from me in front of one of the jewelry shops. Ivy is my age, and while she's not as pretty are her older sister, she is equally as vicious in her temperament. Her and I have gotten into more than one fight during the school year and I duck my head down again so she won't see me.

"When a boy goes out of his way to buy you dinner, you know what they want…" I don't want to listen to them speak, so I keep walking. I bet their parents are here on vacation or something… I think of coming here and spending the week at Folk Hills whenever I wanted. Again, I wish I was rich.

"Ginny," I turn around and see a nervous looking Harry holding two vanilla ice cream cones. I tilt my head to the side and push the sun glasses to the top of my head as he blinks at me. "I didn't know what flavor you wanted, so I just went with the safest option."

My heart skips and then I feel embarrassed. Did he see me going through my purse and just assumed I couldn't afford it? "Harry… I…." I open my purse and start digging through it to get to the coins. So much for saving a few coins today. "Let me pay you back," I tell him quickly. I know my family isn't well off and I know Harry has given my brothers money in the past. I don't want him to pity my situation. "I have the money," I say quietly as I take a few coins out.

"No, I don't want you to pay me," he says quickly and I take the cone because the ice cream is starting to melt. "Just…. Just eat it," he says quickly and his face looks odd for a moment before he turns around and walks away, heading towards my brother and Hermione who were both watching us with raised eyebrows.

That was freaking odd.

The cream starts dripping down my fingers and I shake my head before trying to salvage what's left of the treat that Harry bought for me. I glance to my left and see Pansy and Ivy….

They're both looking right at me and Pansy even smiles a little. The mocking tilt of her lips makes me think of the odd encounter with Malfoy I had yesterday and I look away quickly.

They're probably talking about me and I put my sunglasses down again as I walk towards my brother and his friends, trying to ignore the prickling on the back of my neck that signals I'm still being stared at.

"What should we do first?" Hermione asks excitedly as she finishes off her ice cream and dumps the napkin in one of the bins nearby. "There are so many people here," she says as she looks around at the crowd of people walking to and from the boardwalk and 'beach'.

"We could go on the Ferris Wheel first," I offer, because I really want to go there and Ron makes a face because he's afraid of heights as much as he fears spiders.

"Let's go to the beach," he over rides me and of course his Hermione and Harry agree with him. My fourth wheel status is official once more. They all start walking that way and I frown before following after them, throwing my ice cream cone in the bin as I trail behind.

Trailing behind. That's all I ever seem to do.

"That's a cool statue," Harry points out. The beach has a large statue of the Greek god Poseidon coming from the lake just off of the beach. I don't know why, but Yellow Springs has been trying to develop itself into a 'beach' like town even though the lake isn't nearly as spectacular as the sea.

"Yeah, it's based off the guy who founded the town," Ron says and I shake my head.

"No, it's not," I tell him, using my 'you're stupid' voice. He narrows his eyes at me as we reach the sand and I take off my sandals and hold them in my hand as we walk towards the water.

"Yes, it is," he says hatefully and I roll my eyes.

"Oh, Ron," Hermione shakes her head as well and gives him a pitying look because he's an idiot. "It's so hot out today," she changes the subject just to save face for him like she always does. She rolls up her jeans and walks ankle deep into the water. I follow behind and close my eyes as the coolness of the lake hits my skin.

"It's actually quite lovely out here," Hermione comments the water comes in against our legs. I look over my shoulder as Harry takes off his shirt. I snap my head away quickly and blink a few times because I wasn't ready to see that.

I send a shy look over my shoulder again as he says something to my brother. Quidditch and being the savior of the wizarding world has done wonders for his body.

"You're drooling," Hermione says and she laughs as I look away again. "He has gotten better looking, hasn't he?" she says, glancing at the boys as well.

I actually don't know who she's talking about. Harry or Ron… I know how much she likes my brother even though she pretends to hide it.

"He's always been good looking," I mutter as I turn back to the lake and I look at the horizon. "Unfortunately," I add for my own benefit.

Hermione bends down to put her hands in the water and I chance a glance over my shoulder again, letting the glasses slide down the tip of my nose so I can get a better look.

He's playing some sort of game with my brother with the quaffel Ron brought with him.

I feel my heart doing odd things as I check him out and then I find myself feeling a bit bitter about it. After Ron throws it really high, Harry makes a great catch by jumping up and catching it mid air. He loses his footing on the way down and lands on the sand with a laugh. I smile as well and when he looks at me he gives me a boyish grin that makes my heart clench.

I will never get over Harry Potter.

Damn him.

* * *

My alarm clock blares in my ear and I make an annoyed grunting noise as I reach over to my night stand to press the snooze button. I fumble around until I find it and sigh in relief when the noise dies down. I settle back against my pillow and exhale slowly, letting the warmness of sleep come back to me.

"I hope you didn't press the snooze again," Hermione adds groggily from her cot on the other side of the room. "I'm sick of waking up every five minutes. What time do you have to be at work anyways?" she asks with a yawn. I crack one eye open and look at the clock.

Crap.

I jump up quickly and turn on the light, ignoring the way Hermione moans as I run to my closet and tear through it to find something suitable to wear. I grab a blue dress and strip quickly, not even bothering with Hermione as I throw it over my head and zip it up the best I can. I grab the brush from my vanity and tug it through my hair as I run to the bathroom, trying to braid it quickly so it doesn't look like a complete mess. When I get to the loo, I try to open the door so I can brush my teeth and do my make up, but the door is locked and the shower is on. I kick the door with my foot, stubbing my toe in the process.

"I'm going to be late for work!" I snap tiredly at whoever is impeding on my personal grooming time. I knock on the door a few more times as I spy the time from the clock hanging on the wall. "Please. I'm going to be late."

I hear the water turn off as a few things clatter to the ground. I furrow my brows and put my ear up to the door to hear all the awkward fumbling. I bring my hand up and knock again.

"Ron?" I ask and then I step back when the door opens.

Steam hits my face and my eyes widen at the site of Harry, soaking wet with a towel wrapped around his hips. He's not wearing his glasses and his hair is plastered to his forehead and the side of his face. I hadn't realized how long it was until it was wet.

Oh, holy hell.

"I'm sorry," he says. I'm staring at his stomach. His muscles are well defined and there's a trail that leads all the way down to his…. "Ginny," he says seriously and I shake my head and look at him as he steps to the side. "Sorry…" he mutters again before walking towards my brother's room.

I blink a few times before remembering the time and scurrying into the bathroom. I get ready as quickly as possible and trip over myself to get outside to the Apparation point. When I get to Folk hills, I run towards the main building and cuss silently to myself when I see Del at my station, with a scowl on her face and her arms folded across her broad chest.

"You're late," she says as I try to catch my breath.

"Only a couple of minutes," I explain and she arches one of her dark brows as I melt into the floor. "I'm sorry. It will never happen again," I say and she tilts her chin up.

"See that it doesn't," she says before walking off, her high heels clacking against the marble floor. I let out a breath once she's out of sight and slide behind the counter, letting my bag thump against the ground, trying to get the image of a very wet and very naked Harry Potter off of my mind.

I try to fall into my usual routine with the patrons who approach the desk, but I have to hold in my disappointment when I see Malfoy approach, with his back straight and his nose in the air like the pompous rich boy that he is.

"I'm not going to need these until later," he says as he hands two tennis rackets to me, without a hello or any type of acknowledgement.

I don't even bother to greet him as I take them and walk towards the lockers.

"Do you like working here?" he asks casually as he leans against the counter and looks around like he was uninterested to be having a conversation with me.

I shrug and pick up the ticket as I walk back to him so he can take it, but he doesn't. He just looks down at my hand and at that stupid ribbon around my wrist before his eyes flick to mine.

"Why do you work here?" he asks after a few silent moments and I furrow my brows.

"To make money," I state plainly because I'm actually kind of mad that he's talking to me. I don't want him to talk to me. He creeps me out.

"Yes," he nods his head and he looks at my dress. I had grabbed the blue one my mother made for me last summer in my haste to get ready this morning. It always made me feel feminine and pretty. "What do you do with the money?" he asks and I narrow my eyes. He had no business knowing that and I told him so. He smiles a little bit as I put the ticket on the counter and I huff because he doesn't pick it up. "You obviously don't buy new clothes," he says and my face blushes crimson. Poor white trash, that's what he thought of my family. "I've seen you wear this one before."

I feel something heavy in my stomach. I'm embarrassed that he noticed and embarrassed that he was right. So much for this being my pretty dress. "When?" I ask hotly. He acted like he didn't even know me the other day and now he has my wardrobe memorized?

He shrugs again and looks down at his watch.

"Just take the freaking ticket," I snap because if I don't stop myself, I'm going to say more and then I would get in trouble.

"I didn't intend to make you feel bad," he says and I look down because he just keeps on staring at me. "I was just stating an obvious fact." I blush again and I hear him sigh. "That was the wrong thing to say."

"Yes, it was," I state self consciously as I look down at my dress. My Mom had embroidered little daisies at the bottom with white thread and I glare at them when I realize this shouldn't be my pretty dress at all. I look like a child.

"Are you dating Harry Potter?" he asks out of now where and I can feel my face changing in surprise.

"What?" I snap back as he pulls a piece of lint from his shirt and flicks it away. He doesn't even look uncomfortable for asking me that… he never looks uncomfortable.

"Are you seeing him?" he asks casually as his eyes look into mine and I feel a frown forming my face. He's so random. Did he know that Harry and Hermione were staying at my house right now? "Someone mentioned that you were."

"Who did?" I ask and he raises an eyebrow.

"Does it matter?"

It did. I didn't like the fact that people he would hang out with would talk about me. I never wanted to come up in their conversation. I wanted to stay invisible to that certain ruthless crowd. I knew them from school. They were hateful and fake and disgusting.

"Answer my question," he says sharply after a few moments and I blink a few times. Was that a demand? What in the hell was going on here?

"Um, no?" I say because I really didn't know where this was going.

"'_Um no'_ you don't want to answer my question, or '_um no'_ you aren't dating him?" he asks sharply and I stare at him for a few moments before looking down at my hands and running my fingers across the counters edge.

"I'm not dating him," I whisper even though I wish I could lie and say it was true.

"You sound unsure about it," he says flatly and I just feel a little lost and confused right now. Why would he care who I was dating?

"I'm not dating Harry. What's it to you?" I ask with narrowed eyes and he smiles again, a cruel and handsome smile.

"Did you know, Ginny," he starts and I hate that he said my name. He shouldn't be allowed to. "That my Grandfather was one of the men who founded this club?" he says and I shake my head.

Why should I care?

"No, I didn't know that," I tell him and his eyes flick back into mine. I notice that they're silver rimmed in dark gray.

He steps away from the counter and looks around the hallway with his hands in his pockets. "Do you get lonely back here?" he asks and I sigh. "Not many people make it back here. It's so far away from everything," he states and I just stare at him because in all honestly I don't know what he's playing at.

"I don't really mind," I tell him. _Go away. _

"I bet you don't," he says and then he takes his ticket while putting the tip on the counter. I look at it. It's more than I make in a week. "I'll see you later, Ginny."

"No, I don't want…" I want to give the money back, but he just smiles at me.

He walks away and I shake my head. What is his problem? I pick up the money and debate whether I should give it to someone else, but it's_ so_ much money. I look at his retreating back once more before putting it in my pocket. If he's going to give it away, I might as well take it.

When he comes back, he's with Blaise Zabini.

I really wanted to hide when I saw them. Blaise Zabini was almost too beautiful to be a considered a boy and his presence usually made me feel weird. Like he was almost too feminine looking to be attractive to me, but he was so good looking I couldn't seem to help myself. He was also the most conceited person in the world, if you can believe it. I have nowhere to go, unfortunately, and nowhere to hide, so I stand my ground and stare at them as they approach.

"Hi!" I cringe. My voice is annoyingly chirpy and my face flushed yet again as I mentally scold myself. I see the corner of Zabini's lips turn up as they approach and I look away. I'm not exactly sure what ethnicity he is, either, but the combination of tan skin, golden eyes, and curly black hair is very beautiful.

I don't even bother to wait for the demand, I just turn around to get the stupid tennis rackets… realizing a moment too late that Malfoy never gave me his ticket. I stop and stare at the wall for a moment before clenching my fists and turning back around. They both look highly amused as Draco puts his elbow on the counter and leans against it casually as his eyes dance across my face.

"Can I have your ticket?" I ask, walking back towards them with embarrassed, tightly wound steps. I glance at Zabinbi, he's pulling a cigarette out of his pocket and he puts it between his lips. I frown. "Hey, you can't smoke in here."

His amber eyes glance up at mine before he brings his wand up to light the end. He inhales as the light at the end of the cigarette burns orange and then he lets out a steam of smoke from the corner of his mouth.

"You can't smoke in here," I say a little sterner. He'll set off the smoke alarm and everything! "You'll get in trouble."

"No, I won't," he says with a scoff and then he sends a smirking look to Malfoy before putting a hand in his pocket and flicking his ashes onto the marble floor.

I look around for Del because I know she'd throw a fit if she saw someone smoking in the building. "Just give me your ticket, alright?" I say, narrowing my eyes at Malfoy as he tilts his head to the side.

"What do you think?" he asks as he reaches into his pocket to take out the ticket.

"What do I think about what?" I snap.

"I'm not speaking to you," he says and then his head turns to his friend as I make a face. He was looking right at me when he said that, and now he's looking at Zabini expectantly, like he was waiting for an answer.

Zabini lays his golden eyes on me and runs his thumb across his perfectly sculpted lips. Then he glances at Draco. "Yes," he all he says with a curt head nod.

Malfoy slides the ticket across the table and I take it quickly. I have no idea what they're talking about. The hairs on the back of my neck are standing on end and I can feel them both staring at me as I walk back towards the lockers.

"Definitely yes," I hear Zabini's posh voice add and my ears start burning as I unlock the locker to pull out the rackets.

"Here," I say as I drop the rackets onto the counter top without bothering with being careful. They make a loud clattering sound. "Have a good day."

"It doesn't sound like you mean that," Draco says as he takes the rackets and hands one to his stupid illegally smoking friend. He puts his under his arms and smirks at me. "You don't want me to have a good day, Ginny?"

My name sounds like nails on a chalk board when he says it. "Don't say that," I mumble, sounding much more pathetic and shy than I would have liked.

"Don't say what?" he asks as he leans on the counter with his elbows on the top, getting closer and focusing all of his bloody attention right on me.

"My name," I answer. I swallow that odd lump in my throat and flick a glance at his handsome friend who is watching our exchange with an unreadable expression on his face as he inhales another drag from his cancer causing cigarette. "I don't like the way you say it," I say, trying to sound a bit more firmer as I look back at him.

His eyes fall down to my lips, and I wet them nervously before he finds my eyes again. "What should I call you then?"

I think of my brother and all of the terrible fights he had gotten in with the boy standing in from of me and I find my eyes narrowing again. "Weasley," I answer flatly.

That smirk vanishes quite quickly. In fact, all emotion looks wiped from his face as he stands up and looks down at me with unreadable eyes. He looks different now… colder and closer to the Draco that I know and avoid at all costs.

"It doesn't suit you," he says before making a head motion towards Zabini and walking off.

Zabini doesn't move right away, he just looks at me and when I find it in me to glare at him, he smiles and taps his fingers against the counter before following his friend, smoke trailing behind him.

When they leave, I cross my arms.

What was that all about?

More of his friends started showing up after that.

Greg Goyle and Theo Knott stopped by my counter to have me hold onto their wallets. I have no idea why, none of the men give me their wallets to watch because they just kept them in their pockets, but I had the feeling they just came to look at me, which made me insanely uneasy. When I handed him his ticket, Knott smirked and looked at my chest, blatantly checking out my breasts and I crossed my arms before he smiled and winked, walking off without a word. Every night I would go home and vent my frustrations out on Hermione right before we went to bed and she would listen with a cocked eyebrow as I told her about how freaking weird Draco Malfoy was being and about his stupid guy friends who would come around and try to talk to me.

"Maybe he likes you," she said one night after me complaining and we looked at each other for a long time before busting out laughing.

I rarely saw Hermione during the day, she was always with Harry and my brother, locked away in his room, doing god knows what. So I was grateful for the late night chats in my bedroom.

Malfoy would never like someone like me, we both knew that, I just couldn't figure out what his game was.

I started to become really uncomfortable when the girls started to show up. I knew Pansy Parkison was a bitch, anyone who heard her talk could tell you that, so when she showed up with her little sister and Daphne Greengrass to turn in sunglasses I was nervous. I was beginning to feel like a side show freak because they all just stared at me with critical eyes as I helped them. When I handed Pansy her ticket, she smiled a serpentine smile and her dark eyes twinkled.

What. The. Fuck.

She came back alone the next day, in a yellow bathing suit and flip flops. She didn't have anything with her so I gave her an odd look as she stepped up to my counter and put her elbows on top.

"May I help you?" I asked as she looked down at her nails. She was really tan, hours of being out in the sun had done that to her and she had blonde highlights in her chestnut hair.

"Yeah, you're name's Ginny, right?" she says and I nodded my head. Great. "Ginny Weasley?"

"That's right," I said uncomfortably. Another older man came up and I smiled at him. "I'll be with you one minute, Sir."

"Take all the time you need, red," the gross old man says and I nod my head before turning back to Pansy.

"So? Is there anything you want me to check for you?" I ask and she shakes her head.

"You can help him. I just wanted to talk to you for a moment."

Freaking fine.

"What can I do for you, Mr. Mills?"

He winks at me as he hands me his briefcase. He came straight from work I guess and he smiles at I take it away from him. "You know how I love watching you walk away," he says one of his perverted comments.

"Hey," I hear Pansy snap and I look over my shoulder as she glares at Mr. Mills. "Don't speak to her that way. Have a little respect would you?"

That surprises me and I look at Mr. Millls face as he glares at Pansy. What was that all about? I hand him his ticket and he leaves with a sneer on his face. I watch him walk off. Mumbling stuff about ungrateful brats and when he's gone, I turn to Pansy.

"Thank you," I tell her seriously. "You didn't have to do that… He always says stuff like that. It's harmless."

"He's gross," she says with a scowl on her face before turning back to me. "Anyways, do you know who I am?"

"Yeah?" I say uncomfortably. What is it with all of these people?

She smiles at me. I want to cringe. "Do you like Sylvia Winters?" she asks and I blink for a moment.

"What?"

"Winters… the writer," she says as she nods to my back pack laying against the wall behind me. "I think I see one of her books peaking out there. Which one is that?"

"Oh," I say as I walk over to the bag and stuff the book further inside to hide it. "It's just Bobbi on the Boardwalk." I answer quickly, zipping up the back pack. "I've already read it a couple times."

"I love that one," she says and I eye her suspiciously. "My favorite is Wake, though."

"Me too," I say and she smiles.

"Contrary to popular belief," she says as she picks at her fingernails. "I quite enjoy reading."

"Oh," I say as I walk back towards her, eyeing her like she would pull out her wand at any moment.

"I love your hair," she says when I get close enough and she takes a strand and twirls it between her fingers. I cough uncomfortably and pull away until she drops it. "Is this your natural color?"

"Yes," I answer. Is she going to say something bad? I know all the insults thrown at my brother because of his weasley red hair.

"It's beautiful," she says as she eyes me. "I like it."

"Thanks…." I trail off, not knowing what else to say.

"So, do you think it was right that Bobbi left at the end," she says and I blink a few times in confusion before she nods to my backpack. "You know, he decides to leave."

"Oh," I say again. "No, I don't think he should have left. Everyone was in danger anyways, it wasn't like him leaving was going to help anyone."

"Not into the self sacrificing hero, are you?" she asks and I roll my eyes at the story we're talking about.

"Not when it turns out to be pointless."

"I agree. It's bloody annoying really. It's just setting up the next book though. After Wake, Winter's totally went mainstream with her writing." she says and I laugh a little because I agree with her… I actually agree and I can't believe she described something negatively as 'main stream' because she just screams main stream media to me. She eyes me again. "I've seen you at Yellow Springs," she says and I find myself chewing on my lower lip. "Does your family have a house there as well?"

My cheeks burn. "No, I actually live nearby. We go there sometimes…. Just because."

"It is a beautiful little village," she says as she leans against the counter with her chin in her hand. "They're trying desperately to turn it into a little beach town even though the only attraction is a big fucking lake." I find the corners of my mouth tilt up in an almost there smile. "It looks so tacky now. I bet people will stop going. Did you see the jugglers that were on the boardwalk when you were there?"

I nod my head. "I did." I laugh a little at the memory. "One of the guys was throwing around those big stick looking things," I explain as I do a hand motion to tell my story. "He threw it up in the air and when it came back down it landed right on his head." I bring my hand up to cover my mouth as she laughs. "I thought I was going to die laughing even though I felt a bit bad about it."

"What did he do when it hit him?" She asks with her dark eyes twinkling and I hesitate a second to make sure she's not laughing at me before continuing.

"He looked around to see if anyone saw it and then he started juggling again like nothing had happened. Poor guy."

"That is funny," she says and then she sighs loudly as she looks at the clock hanging on the opposite wall. "I better go. I told my sister I'd meet her by the pool half an hour ago and she can be a real cunt when she's angry."

I snort at her language and she smirks as she leans across my counter. "I'm staying with my father this weekend. He has a house on the lake at Yellow Springs," she says and I lift my brows. "You should come over tonight. It could be fun."

Right. "Why?" I manage to ask. I can't help but get the image of me showing up to something humiliating out of my head.

"Because I like you," she says with a short nod of her head. She grabs a comment card from the desk and a pen. "I'm always looking for new and interesting people to hang out with," she says as she writes something down on the paper. "And why should we limit ourselves and our experiences right?" she says as she slides the paper to me, with her eyes twinkling.

"Right," I say as I take the paper. I glance down. It's an address and ward code.

"Be careful with that… Daddy would have a fit if he knew his password was just floating around."

"Okay," I say as I fold it up. "I won't lose it or anything."

"You definitely should come, Ginny. You'll have a good time."

"Maybe," I say with a shrug, even though I know there is no way in hell I'm going to this girl's house.

"See you there," she says as she blows me a kiss and starts walking off.

"Weird," I mutter to myself before going to my bag and stuffing the paper in the front pocket.

Nadia shows up an hour later and I sigh in relief, barely even saying good bye as I pack up my stuff and start to walk away from the check out station. I bring my hand up to my face and I start biting my fingernails as I furrow my brows and think about that odd conversation with Pansy. What's she playing at anyways? Does she really want to be my friend or is she planning something humiliating.

If I have to second guess her intentions, I really don't think I need to think on it much more, really.

As I'm walking down the hallway to the back entrance, I hear an odd thumping noise and I pause with my head tilted to the side. When I hear it again, followed by an odd moaning noise, I'm convinced someone is hurt so I search for the noise and end up in front of one of the maintenance closets. I take a step towards it and bite the corner of my lip as I bring my knuckles towards the door to knock.

"Are you okay in there?" I ask cautiously as I rap against the wood. The movement and noises on the inside suddenly stop. "Are you hurt?" I ask softly with concern. "I'm going to open the door now." I lick my lips and touch the doorknob.

Before I can turn the handle, the door swings open and the surprise makes me fall back. I'm still wearing the stupid heels, and they make me trip, landing on my bottom as two people walk out.

Oh.

No one was hurt.

"I'm sorry!" I squeak as Malfoy and Cho Chang readjust their clothing. I'm so stupid.

"You say that a lot," Draco says gruffly as he buckles his belt as Cho blushes crimson. He steps out into the hallway with Chang behind him, looking bashful. "I doubt you mean it."

"You're not going to tell anyone, are you?" Cho asks as she tries to right her hair. I don't even bother getting up as my mouth hangs open like an idiot.

I glance at Draco and he raises his eyebrow… for some reason that makes me blush crimson and I snap my mouth shut. His eyes travel between my legs and I realize my legs are parted at my knees and he has a pretty good view of my knickers. I blush an even darker shade of red as I snap my legs shut.

"My father would kill me if he knew what I was doing. Draco, give her some money," she whispers that last part with her head turn towards Malfoy but I heard it and I narrowed my eyes.

My surprise is gone and anger courses through me at her comment. "I don't need your money," I bite out. "Don't worry, Chang. I'm not going to tell anyone what you were doing in a maintenance closet with Malfoy of all people," I say hatefully and her cheeks turn hot as she nods her head.

"Thanks." She just said thanks to me. I don't think she caught onto my derisive tone. I glare at her as she turns to Malfoy and squeezes his arm. "I should go. I'll see you later."

He nods at her and watches her walk down the hallway. When he turns back to me I find my mouth curling back in a scowl. "You're disgusting," I tell him with a sneer and he lifts an eyebrow as he takes a step towards me.

"You think I'm disgusting?" he says. He takes another step and I back up until I hit the wall. What is he doing? "Hm, is that what you think?"

"Yes, in fact, that is what I think," I tell him as he gets so close that the edge of his shoes are right up against mine. I can feel his breath on my face and I look at his throat. "Step back," I tell him and I try to make an escape by sliding away from the right, but he puts his arm out to stop me. "Go away," I say seriously. I just want to go home.

"Do you _really_ want me to go away?" I give him an odd look as he looks down at me with dark eyes. The way he said that… the tone of his voice… oh my god is he _hitting_ on me? I widen my eyes and he smirks. He steps even closer and his hips align with mine. Something tumbles around in my stomach at the contact and I try to shake it off. "You won't always think that way. I promise you that."

He steps back and I sigh in relief because I can breathe normally again. "Whore," I mutter and he laughs.

"What did you just call me?" he asks with a laugh still in his voice.

"You heard me," I say as I straighten out my dress just so I have something to do with my hands.

He laughs again as he walks off and I slump against the wall. Things were going so much better before he showed up for the summer.

* * *

"Hermione?"I walk further down the hallway with my bare feet cold against the wood floors. "Hermione, where are you?" I need to tell someone about finding Draco with Cho Chang at work and Hermione is always the best listener. I go to my brother's room and put my ear against the door. "Hermione, are you in there?"

Silence.

I frown and walk towards my room again. She's not in there either and she wasn't anywhere down stairs.

I'm used to the three of them going off and being by themselves, but I just really wanted to talk to her!

"Mom!" I call as I poke my head out of my bed room.

"Yes?" She calls from somewhere downstairs.

"Do you know where Hermione is?"

"I don't know, sweetheart!" she yells back and I frown. "Did you check your room?"

"I'm in my room," I mutter as I shut my door and then stare at her bags.

Where did they go? With a sigh I walk over to my window and open it up so I can get some fresh air. I sit on the ledge and stare at the overcast sky for a while before something catches my attention out of the corner of my eyes. It's Harry, Hermione, and Ron. I see them walking back from the garden and they stop, with their heads bent together, discussing something. I nearly wave and call out to them, but they look so serious.

I want to know what they're talking about.

I go to my vanity and dig into one of my drawers, moving around nail polish bottles and hair clips before finding the flesh colored string Fred had given me as a birthday present two years ago. I'm sick of their secrets anyways. It's not fair. I can handle things too, you know.

I go back over to the window lower half of the expendable ear out of it, watching it roll along the grass to the nearest humans, that being my brother and his two friends. When I'm sure I won't get caught, I put the other end up to my ear so I can listen to their conversation.

"Next week…." I hear Harry say in a fuzzy voice. I pull the string out of my ear and blow some dust off of it. It has been in my drawer for a while and I put it back against my ear. "I can't stay here any longer knowing what's going on out there."

"Harry," The sound is much clearer now and I smirk at my own cleverness as Hermione's voice comes into focus. "He's in hiding now. Things are going smoothly. If we wait until we're back at Hogwarts I'm sure…"

"We're leaving next week," he says finally. "We'll be back before school starts."

"Can't I at least tell my Mom?" Ron interjects, sounding less than thrilled with this. Where are they going to go anyways? "You know she'll go mental when she wakes up and finds us all gone."

"No one can know where we're going. You can leave a note or something saying we'll be back, but that's it. We can only trust ourselves." Harry sometimes gets this very dominate leader voice and I can't help but find that appealing. "We're not talking about this anymore. Like I said, if all goes well we'll be back before school starts."

"What about Ginny?" Hermione asks and I feel my ears perk up at being mentioned. "We're just leaving her too? It's going to be hard sneaking out of her room in the middle of the night."

"Find a way," Harry snaps and I make a face.

"It's going to hurt her feelings… you know her birthday is soon…"

"Hermione, she can't go with us. She needs to get her own friends," my brother sighs and I furrow my brows again. Where are they going and why can't I go with them? "You know how annoying she can get."

Annoying!

"Yeah," Hermione agrees with a sigh.

Yeah! Did she just agree with him! My fist clenches.

"We can only trust ourselves," Harry says as he makes a motion with his hand, signaling the three of them. "No one else… not even Ginny. She's not a part of this."

I yank the string back until it curls up the window again and I glare at it, not wanting to hear more. I always knew I wasn't 'a part of it' but I didn't need to hear them say it. I slam my window closed and stomp towards my closet, pulling things off the hangers and packing them in a small duffle bag. I need my own friends, Ron is right about that. I go to the bathroom and pack up my toothbrush and makeup before going back to my room to get my shoes.

I hear footsteps in the hallway, but I ignore them as I furiously pack. I grab the back pack I usually bring to work with me and I tug out my notebook and after a deliberating second I also grab that little piece of paper that Pansy Parkinson had given me. It's always good to meet new people and to never limit yourself. Isn't that what she said… something like that?

"Hey, Gin," Hermione says happily from the doorway and I narrow my eyes as I stuff the notebook and paper into my overnight back. "Your Mom said you were looking for me?"

"I was," I answer. "But I'm not anymore so you can go back to Ron and Harry."

"Oh…" she says seriously as I stand up and sling the duffle bag over my shoulder before turning to face her. "You seem upset. Did you want to talk about anything?"

"Nope," I say as I dust out the crinkles of my dress. "I'm going to stay at Luna's tonight."

"Oh?" she says and then she smiles. "How is Luna? I haven't seen her in a while."

"She's fine," I say shortly and she tilts her head to the side.

"Are you guys doing anything in particular tonight?" She asks curiously. I know what she's doing. She wants me to invite her to go as well because I'm her window into all things girl since she hangs out with boys all the time, but I won't. Not this time. "I'm so tired of hanging out with guys," she says with a laugh.

"I think we're going to go to a party," I say as I think of Pansy Parkinson. I'm not exactly sure if what she invited me over for was a party, but I wanted to make Hermione jealous.

"A party?" she says, sounding almost excited about it. "What kind of party?"

"A fun party," I tell her coolly as I walk towards the door. "You wouldn't like it. It would probably _annoy_ you, really."

She looks hurt for half a second when she realizes I'm not going to ask her to come. "Does your Mother know you're going to a party?" she asks, catching onto my tone.

"No," I say as I pass by her and open my door. "Are you going to tell her? Or is that loyalty only saved for Harry and Ron?"

"I won't tell on you," she states bitterly and I give her a bitter smile before leaving her there. I actually feel really guilty for the way I just treated her, but I felt like she deserved it… they deserve it.

I inhale deeply and hop down the steps two at a time before passing the den where my father is reading the paper in his favorite chair. "Bye Dad!" I wave at him as I walk over to the fire place, happy that it's him who I'll get to talk to this time around. My mother is a monster when it comes to this kind of stuff.

"Bye…" he says dismissively and then he blinks at me as I grab a handful of floo powder. "Uh, where are you going?"

"I'm staying the night at Luna's," I tell him with a smile.

He surveys me for a second before nodding his head. "Right. Well, have a good time, little one."

I smirk before disappearing into the flames, arriving in Luna's living room as she carefully finishes up a puzzle she's been working on all year.

"Ginny?" she asks in an airy voice as she stands up with her brows furrowed together. "What are you doing here?"

"Is your Dad here?" I ask as I look around the room, dusting soot from my clothes.

She shakes her head. "He's always gone on Thursday nights. Why?" She eyes my duffle bag. "Are you staying the night?"

I nod my head. "I was thinking we could go somewhere different tonight." I tell her as I put my bag on the table and I pull out Pansy's piece of paper. "Do you want to come with me?" I ask and she smiles.

"I do love new things," she says and I smirk at her before we both run up stairs to get ready.

I love new things too I've decided.


	2. Chapter 2

"Do I look okay?" I ask seriously as I pat down my hair. I let Luna curl it before we came and I'm a little self conscious about it. Luna has a way of making simple things look ridiculous.

"You look fine," she says seriously before trying to smooth out the crinkles on her yellow top. "Do I look alright?"

I spare her a little glance. "You always look nice," I admit with envy and she shakes her head with a small smile on her face, clearly not believing me. "We don't have to go," I tell her as we stand outside, ready to Apparate with that piece of paper in my hand. "We could just stay in and eat pizza or something."

"You said that Pansy was nice to you," she says and I nod my head. "Maybe she's not as bad as she seems. We should at least give her the benefit of the doubt, right?"

"I'm just a little nervous," I admit out loud and Luna squeezes my arm.

"If we get there and have a bad feeling about it… we'll just leave, alright?"

"Do you remember the code word?" I ask and she nods her head.

"Whiplash," she answers and I nod. "If you want to leave, just say that word and we're gone."

Luna has always been braver than I am… I think the sorting hat must have a made a mistake with us. I nod my head and she holds onto my arm as I apparate us to the Yellow Springs address. The house before us is magnificent. It's a large three story pale yellow house with white woodwork and a slanted roof. I have never seen so many balconies or such a well put together landscape as the one before us and I feel my heart pummel in my chest.

"Oh my," Luna says as she looks around her at the well manicured lawn.

Oh my, indeed.

"I didn't think people actually lived like this," she says softly as she looks back at the large, beautiful, dream house.

"Are we still doing this?" I ask nervously and she takes my hand as we walk up the stairs to the wraparound porch. There's a wind chime and it whistles with our approach as the floor boards of the porch creak under our feed. Once at the door, I gently lift my hand, ignoring the nervous flutter in my stomach as I knock. "Ginny," Luna whispers and I glance at her as she points to a rather posh and decorative looking door bell.

Oh.

I press it, hearing the bell signal in the inside. I run a hand through my hair once again and pray that this is the right house as footsteps approach. A tall man with a thick mustache and combed back hair answers the door and I raise my brows as he eyes us over. He has to be in his late forties and he's wearing a casual linen shirt and slacks.

"Hi," I say nervously.

"I take it you're here for Pansy," he says in a dismissive tone. I nod my head as he takes a glass of wine from one of the side tables and takes a sip from it. "She's down at the dock with the others. Just walk around back and use the red gate."

He closes the door and I send an odd look to Luna before doing as he says and following the path he had indicated. The sun has set and it's already dark outside, but they have fairy lights leading the way along the bricks and I smile at them as we walk. It looks so pretty. I hear music playing loudly from a radio and I see a small fire down the hill that makes my stomach twist nervously. When we get to the red gate that leads down to the lake, I stop for a moment and decide whether I want to do this. I look back up at the huge house… what would I even talk about with these people anyways? This was a mistake… a stupid mistake that I dragged Luna to and I already regret…

"Ginny? Is that you?" I snap my head up when I see someone walking up from the other side of the gate. Pansy smiles as she approaches and when she notices Luna behind me, I see that smile falter the slightest bit. "You brought someone," she says flatly as she opens the gate so we can pass through it.

"Yeah, I hope you don't mind," I say as I put my hand on the back of my neck because I'm nervous to be around new people. New people who are wealthy and have a reputation for being mean, that is. "This is Luna Lovegood," I introduce her politely and Luna holds out her hand to shake, but Pansy eyes it coolly before plastering a fake smile on her face and shaking her head .

"Sorry, my hands are dirty. I've been down in the sand," she says, offering up an excuse as Luna slowly retracts her hand with a blush playing on her fair cheeks. "Come on down. Just about everyone is here," she says as she makes a motion for us to follow her down the walk way. "Is that all you brought?" she inquires while nodding to my attire. I'm wearing what I usually wear… jean shorts and a tank top.

I nod my head and tug on the bottom of the top as she eyes me. "Yeah…"

"I have extra blankets and stuff," she assures me. "It gets cold once the sun sets by the water."

"Oh, I didn't even realize," I say as she falls into step beside me, not giving Luna enough room to join us. I look over my shoulder and Luna gives me an encouraging smile. "You're house is beautiful," I tell her to break the ice and she smirks at me.

"I know, right?" is all she says and I furrow my brows as I look away. That wasn't the answer I was expecting exactly.

"Was that your father who answered the door for us?" Luna asks in her soft voice as we continue to walk down the stone steps towards the dock.

"Yes, it was," she sighs like she was bored. "He wasn't thrilled that I was having people over tonight, but I usually get my way in the end anyways," she smiles at me and I give her an uncomfortable smile back.

"You have his nose," Luna says and I close my eyes at the gaffe as Pansy stops walking and turns around.

"What does that mean?"

I know her nose has to be a sensitive subject. She's beautiful despite the turn upped shape, but I know that's the first thing someone points out when they're fighting her and want to hurt her feelings. It's the only imperfect thing on her perfect body. I guess that's why I like it so much.

"She didn't mean anything bad," I say to rectify the situation because I can see Pansy's eyes narrow at the totally oblivious Luna. "She just meant that you look like your Dad a little."

"Is that what you meant?" Pansy asks in that bitchy voice I'm so used to hearing from her. I swallow hard and give Luna a distressed look.

"Of course," Luna says with a confused tilt of her head and Pansy surveys her for a second before nodding her head and turning around.

"Come on then," she states dryly and we follow her all the way down to the sand part of the lake, where a group of people are sitting around a small fire on logs and lawn chairs, drinking out of plastic cups. "Okay, people!" Pansy says as we approach. Her disposition seems sunny and agreeable once again as she turns down the radio. "Time for introductions." She puts her hand on my arm and pulls me forward. I'm almost relieved to see that it's just a group of girls.

"Starting on the right," she says as she points to the girl with honey blonde hair and a pouty pink mouth. "This is Daphne, beside her is Felicity, sitting in the chair is Astoria," Astoria is in my grade as well. She's the blonde's little sister and they look so similar that they could be twins. "You know Ivy," she says as she points to her kid sister, whose black hair is tied up in a severe looking pony tail. Her eyes take me in with icy indifference as she downs the contents of her plastic cup. I shudder and turn away from her. "Sandra, Alex, Melinda," she's just pointing at girls now, girls that I barely remember seeing at school in the hallways. "Cho," she says pointing to Cho Chang, and I blush, not able to look her in the eyes because the last time I saw her I had caught her doing something gross with Malfoy in a closet. "And this is Millie," she says as she finishes with the girl sitting to my left.

My eyes widen when I realize who that thin and beautiful girl named Millie is. Millicent Bulstrode was always an unfortunate looking girl with mousey brown hair and large square shoulders that made her look like an adult male quidditch player. She was bigger than most boys in the school by the time she was fourteen, heavy set as well as tall, and I always felt a little bit bad for her… but now… she most definitely had some charms and work done. Her jaw is more feminine, her nose no longer has that haggish bump. She still looks tall, but she's slim like a model and her hair looks fuller somehow, more rich. I know it's her though. I can tell by her dark eyes. She's sneering at me now just like she sneered at me when she looked like a man.

"Ginny this is everyone," Pansy says with that serpentine smile. "Everyone, this is Ginny," she glances at me and then at Luna at my side. "And her friend," she adds dismissively and I send an apologetic look to Luna who merely shrugs her small shoulders. "Well, take a seat then. Daphne, move over so Ginny can sit beside you."

Daphne with her honey blonde hair sighs loudly and she gives me a pageant winning smile as I take a seat beside her on the log. Luna follows as well and scrunches in beside me and the girl introduced as Felicity. Felicity makes a face before getting off the log and moving to the other side by Millicent who has yet to stop staring daggers at me.

"Do you want something to drink, Ginny?" Pansy asks as she walks over to a blue cooler in the sand and she takes out a red plastic cup from the package. I look at Daphne as she holds up her cup and she tilts it to me so I can see inside. I sniff it and shake my head.

"Is it alcohol?" I ask, sounding a bit like a child. Pansy laughs a little and nods her head. I feel very un-cool right now. "No, I'm okay."

"How about some lemonade, then?" she asks and I lick my lips before nodding my head. Lemonade is safe… lemonade is good.

She reaches into the cooler and pulls out a glass bottle, unscrewing the lid and handing it to me after getting one for Luna as well. "Here you go," she says with a smirk as she hands me the drink. I thank her as she hands one to Luna as well. "And Laura too," she adds and I take a sip from the Lemonade. It doesn't taste right… but I've never had fancy lemonade from a bottle so I ignore it.

"Her name is Luna," I correct her and she nods her head.

"Of course," she says as she sits down on one of the vacant chairs. "Luna."

It is getting a bit chilly out here in the dark, so I grab a blanket from behind me and pull it around my shoulders, sharing it with Luna after she gives me an envious look. I smile at her as I fold the blanket around her shoulders as well and I take another careful sip of the odd tasting Lemonade as the girls start talking again.

"When are the boys coming?" Millicent asks in a huff after she decided she was done glaring at me. I uncomfortably start pulling off the label of my bottle just so I have something to do with my hands. "I'm getting bored."

Boys… does that mean like Blaise and Draco… are those their boys? I shudder to think.

"Millie, you slut," Pansy says and the girls giggle as she checks her watch. "I don't know when they're coming. It depends on the card game and how drunk they all get."

"I bet you're hoping Zabini will show up. Right?" Ivy says, eyeing her older sister with mirth shining in her eyes. "Don't think I didn't hear you last night. If Dad heard you he would have had a fit."

Pansy shrugs her shoulders and downs her drink. "What can I say? He has magic fingers."

I make a face as the others laugh. "Are you dating Blaise?" I ask after taking another large sip from the odd tasting drink.

"Well, kind of in a way I guess," she says with a delicate shrug as her sister smirks at her. "I mean… it's not official, but he makes it worth it if you know what I mean."

I smile with the others. "Yeah," I agree even though I have no idea what she's talking about.

"How do you like working for people at the Hills, Weasley? Do you like being the help?" Millicent asks hatefully and I see Pansy shoot her a warning look as I take another drink and try not to rise to her bait. "Do you like it?" she softens the question as I cough uncomfortably into my hand.

"I don't mind it," I say with a shrug, trying to be normal. "I like making my own money," I say. There are blank stares all across the board. I cough again before taking another drink. "Do any of you have jobs or anything?" I ask softly as I glance around me, finally settling on Daphne as she stares at me with wide blue eyes.

"I work for my Dad sometimes," Pansy shrugs and Ivy laughs.

"You do not," she scoffs.

"I have a job," Daphne says after some deep thought and I give her a curious look as she nods her head.

"Beauty pageants do not count as work," Her little sister Astoria says with an eye roll and I find myself smiling at her inflamed look.

"They do too!" she snaps as she sits forward so she can glare at her sister. "I work hard and when I win I get money and all that kind of stuff. So that counts as a job."

"I think that counts," I tell her and she smiles a wide beautiful smile at me.

"See, Ginny thinks so," she says and I smile because I'm glad I said something right. Beside me, Luna is reading the label on her bottle of lemonade, and she nudges my shoulder but I ignore her as Pansy starts speaking to me again.

"So what do you do with the money?" she asks seriously and I frown, remembering when Draco asked me that same question. "Do you help pay the bills or something?"

I narrow my eyes because I think she's making fun of me and when she sees it she shakes her head.

"I didn't say that to be a bitch," she says quickly and I let anger ebb away when I realize she's being genuine. "I was just curious, is all."

"It's okay," I say before finishing off the rest of my bottle. Another one is handed to me by Daphne and I smile at her as I twist off the top. "I'm actually saving all of the money for a writing retreat next summer," I tell her and she nods her head as if she's really listening.

"Ginny…" I hear Luna whisper, but I ignore her because I'm still talking.

"They have real writers there to teach workshops and everything," I say, excited as I think about it. I even sit up a bit straighter. "Winters is going to be there," I tell Pansy and she smiles as I grin at her. Why am I grinning? "It should be a good time."

"That does sound interesting," Millicent says sarcastically and because I feel odd and brave I glare right back at her.

"It _is_ interesting," I snap as I take another gulp of the lemonade.

"Ginny," Luna says and I spin my head to her because she keeps on tugging on my arm. "Whiplash," she says the code word for us to leave and I furrow my brows. Why should we leave?

I tilt my head to the side. "I feel fine," I tell her as I turn back to the girls who are talking to themselves again. In fact, I feel great. My cheeks feel warm and my hands are tingling. I just want to keep drinking, so I take another drink and then another until the second bottle is down.

I'm starting to get hot so I push the blanket off of me as I take another bottle that's handed to me. I take another drink and laugh at whatever Ivy just said and she gives me an odd look. "Light weight," she mutters as Luna tugs on my arm.

"Stop tugging on me," I tell her as I pull away from her.

"Whiplash," she says through gritted teeth and I shake my head.

"No, I want to stay."

"That's good!" Pansy laughs as she sits forward again. "Ginny, come sit by me," she says as she scoots over in her chair and pats the spot beside her.

I stand up and the world spins as I walk towards her. I trip over my own feet and barely catch myself before Cho stands up and grabs me before I fall onto my face.

"Thanks," I say loudly and then I pat her shoulder as I stand up straight. "If I had money with me I would give you some," I tell her, remembering her words from before and everyone laughs as I take a seat beside Pansy, who I have decided that I like.

"What are you going to do after you graduate?" I blurt out before she can say anything and she lifts her brows. "I can't wait to go to College," I admit seriously and then I smile at her. "What school are you going to go to?"

She shrugs. "I'm not sure yet. I think I might go to Black. My mother and father both went there, so I'm a shoo in," she says with a smile and I smile back.

"Black is an amazing college," I say with a head nod. "I would love to go there if I could afford it." I can't believe I said that out loud, but my tongue feels loose now and I just feel like saying everything on my mind.

"So you are definitely going to school after Hogwarts?" she says, eyeing me. I nod my head. "That's good," she says.

"I'm so bored," Millicent whines and I look at her as she groans. "Let's play a game or something."

"I agree," Daphne says and then she claps her hands. "Oh, I know. Let's play never have I ever."

"How do you play that?" I ask as I look at Luna who is looking steadily into the fire with the blanket wrapped around her… she looks kind of like a white haired bat.

I snort in laughter and Pansy looks at me oddly before explaining the game. "You put five fingers up and when it's your turn, you have to say a sexual thing that you've never done. If someone has done it, they have to put down their finger. The person who runs out of fingers loses and they have to do a dare at the end."

"Oh," I say. I think I just might win this game, actually.

"Put your fingers up," Daphne says gleefully as we all put our fingers up, but Luna who is still staring at the fire. I should ask her what's wrong… "I'll go first." My attention shifts from my friend to the girl beside her. "Never have I ever….. had sex on a boat," she says and Pansy groans as she puts her finger down.

I give her a judging look and she nudges me. "It was fun," she defends.

"Luna, it's you turn," I say as all the girls eye her coolly and she shakes her head.

"I'm not playing," she whispers and I furrow my brows.

"My turn then!" Astoria says as she bites the corner of her lip. "Never have I ever….Oh this is a good one," she says with a wicked smile. "Never have I ever had sex," she says. Everyone else puts their finger down but me and her. She smiles at me. "Yay for virginity," she says and I laugh.

"Never have I ever…" Ivy starts as she purses her lips and looks into the fire as she thinks about it. "Never have I ever let a guy put his thing in my… " she wiggles her eyebrows and I'm confused.

"In my what?" Millicent asks sharply, annoyed with the vagueness.

"You know in my… back door," she says and I can't help but laugh at that. Honestly! I look around for anyone to put their finger down to that one and then Daphne Greengrass, out of all people, covers her face and puts down a finger to a chorus of laughs and disapproving sounds.

"Who and when?" Pansy asks disbelievingly as Daphne peaks at us from between her fingers like she was embarrassed.

"Roy," she says with a sigh as she lowers her hand. "Last summer. He talked me into it."

"Roy? As in pool boy Roy?" Ivy says in disgust.

Roy. I think I may know him. He manages the pool at the club. I widen my eyes. He's like thirty something. "Roy who works at the club?" I ask and she nods her head in shame.

"He's really hot, alright," she says in a defensive tone. "And he bought me alcohol while I was underage, I felt like I owed him," she says to more laughs as Pansy mutters something about jail bait. "It's not a pleasant experience. I wouldn't recommend it."

"Point taken," Pansy says as she takes another drink from her glass. That Felicity girl goes next.

"Never have I ever been fingered in public…"

It went on like that for a while and when it was my turn my 'Never have I Evers' were greatly tame considering the perverted things that were coming out of some of these girls mouths. I learned a lot of interesting things and some of the stuff I wasn't even totally sure what they were talking about. I was having fun, though. Everyone just assumed I was a Tom Boy who liked to play quidditch, but I liked being a girl and having that kind of companionship too. Being around this group was something totally new to me. They were all so open and honest and the sex stuff they were talking about was intriguing to me because that was something I was never exposed to in casual conversations with my other friends. They weren't like Hermione, who was embarrassed just to think about kissing a boy, and they weren't like Luna who's never crushed on anything in her life. They were the kind of girlfriends I always wanted to have.

It was safe to say that towards the end of the game I had every one of my fingers left while a few of the girls were barely holding on to one. Even Cho… not that I was surprised after seeing her in that closet with Malfoy…

"Alright my turn," Pansy says once it looped around to her again. I hear people coming down the walkway, but I ignore the voices as Pansy looks at my fingers, all of them still securely in place. "Never have I ever kissed Harry Potter," she says, watching my hand. I raise my eyebrows and shake my head as Cho makes a groaning noise.

"Crap," she says sadly as she puts down her finger. "I lose."

"What was it like kissing the boy wonder?" Millicent asks from her spot as she flicks her manicured fingers against her plastic cup.

"It wasn't very good, actually," she says and I feel a fire in my chest because I want to defend him. Cho knows how mean these girls are to him… they could make fun of him for this. Even though I liked them now… I knew they didn't like Harry. "It was sloppy and he was so weird about it. I'm glad I decided not to date him."

"Harry's a great kisser," I find myself saying and everyone looks at me.

"You didn't put your finger down," Pansy points out and I frown as I put my hand down.

"I lied. Harry is the best kisser." I don't know why I'm even defending him after listening to him with Hermione and Ron in the garden… I just didn't want other people to think bad things about him.

"What else did you lie about?" Millicent says, raising her eyebrow as she looks at my fingers.

I clench my jaw together, not wanting to dig myself deeper when I hear a deep and dominant voice sound from behind me.

"You said you weren't dating him." I look over my shoulder quickly at that voice and my cheeks heat more than before to see Draco standing there with his arms crossed over a black zip up hoodie.

"Blaise!" Pansy stands up and runs over to Zabini who's digging something out of a cooler they brought. There are about five guys with them and I stand up and match his stance because I don't want to be at a disadvantage.

"Well?" he says icily and I narrow my eyes. Again, why is it his business?

"I'm not dating him," I say stiffly. I don't want to seem like too much of a liar. After all, I already told him I wasn't. "You don't have to be dating someone to kiss them," I snap, feeling braver and more loosely lipped than I've ever been.

"Too true," I hear a girl say behind me as Draco unfolds his arms and walks closer to me. He looks into my eyes, focusing intently on me before smirking.

"You're lying," he says flatly.

"No, I'm not."

"Draco, can I talk to you for a moment," Cho comes out of nowhere and puts her hand on his arm. He gives her an irritated glance before glaring at me.

"In a minute," he tells her. "Say that you're lying," he says and I crinkle my nose at him. I hate he's demanding me again. It just irks me.

"I'm not lying," I tell him haughtily.

"Tell me you're lying," he demands once again, but Cho tugs on his arm once more, breaking his eye contact. "Will you just wait for one bloody moment," he snaps at her before looking back at me, but I'm already over it as I walk over to Luna and plop down beside her.

Draco's still glaring at me as I turn to her. "I think I'm ready to leave now," I tell her and she glances at me over her blanket cocoon.

"So now you're ready to leave," she snaps and I sigh.

"I know. I'm sorry. I was having fun for a second there."

"Of course you were," she says as she picks up her bottle and shows me the label. "You're drunk."

"What?" I grab the bottle and squint down at it, trying to read it in the darkness.

"Its Alcoholic lemonade, Ginny," she spells it out for me as I frown. "That's why you were having such a good time."

I put my hand on my forehead as the girls get up to mingle with the newly arrived boys. "I'm so stupid," I say to myself and it sounds slurred. She shakes her head.

"She knew you didn't want to drink," she says as she glances at Pansy who's flirting with Zabini. "But she gave it to you anyway."

"I should have known though," I say, feeling embarrassed for how idiotic I am. "It's on the label. She didn't do it on purpose," I say and she gives me a hard look before turning away.

"Maybe you're right. Anyways, I want to go home too. Let's go before it gets too late," she says as she stands and lets the blanket fall to the ground. I stand as well and the world spins again as I hold onto Luna for support. "Have you ever drank, Ginny?" she asks as she holds me up and I shake my head. "Great…" she whispers.

"Wait," I say as we start walking away. "We should say goodbye."

I go to walk back to the group, but Luna tugs on me. "You can see goodbye another time. I just want to go home."

I nod my head and follow her as she tugs me along to the concrete steps so we can go back towards the house. "I'm sorry I'm such a terrible friend," I mutter to her. I should have just left when she said whiplash. That was the deal.

It seems to be hitting me all at once, though, and I sway on my feet as I try not to trip.

"Luna," I say softly as my head spins and my mouth waters. "Stop walking," I say with blurry eyes as I stop in my tracks and lean on her for support again midway up the stairs. "I think I'm going too…" I gag, but try to swallow it. "I think I'm going to…"

"Puke…" Luna says as I do just that all over her shoes. She sighs in disgust as I fall to my knees. I've never felt this terrible before. I feel like there's something inside of me squeezing my insides until every last drop I have in there is out.

I hear footsteps approach and I clench my eyes shut in embarrassment at being found this way as Luna holds back my hair.

"She's never drank before," I hear Luna explain to whoever it is as my eyes water and my stomach convulses into dry heaves. I'm sure I look attractive.

Just _wonderful._

"Take her inside and clean her off," I hear that deep dominate voice again and I grown when I realize it's _him_ witnessing this. "Pansy, do it now," he snaps.

"Come on," Pansy says and I feel the hand that was holding up my hair get tugged away. "You have puke all over you shoes. Draco will make sure she's okay."

"But…" I hear Luna say as she's pulled away and I get up on my hands and knees. I have no idea why. I'm just trying to deaden the pain as a large hand touches my back.

"It's not fun, is it?" he says and I shake my head as I start to cry. It's starting to hurt. I don't want to throw up anymore.

"I feel like I'm dying." I say with a hoarse voice before swallowing hard.

"Have you really never drunk alcohol before?" he asks curiously as he places something over my shoulders. Why is he being so nice to me?

Where did Luna go?

I shake my head. "I didn't know it was alcohol," I cry as I bring my hand up to wipe away tears. "I'm stupid," I state harshly. "Where's Luna… I need Luna." I go to sit back on my knees but another onslaught of stomach convulses stops me as my mouth waters and tries to expel things from an empty stomach. "I hate this."

I sit back again and tug on the sleeves of the hoodie he put on me. Is this his? I shake my head and zip it up and I glance up at him as he kneels beside me. He looks all handsome in a white button down and slacks. I look at my own self and then the puke puddle in front of me and I start crying again, pissed off that he had to see me like this.

"You think I'm trash," I ramble on between sobs as I remember his last fight with my brother on the platform. I'm just pulling out random things now and I can't stop myself.

"No," is all he says as he puts his hand on my arm as if too pull me up, but I don't want to move just yet, so I hold my place. "Let's go to the boat house. I can get you a glass of water and there's a bed. You can lie down," he explains and I shake my head.

"No, you're mean."

"Am I being mean to you right now?" he snaps at me, trying to pull me up again, but I fall into his chest. Suddenly I have this overwhelming desire to be held so I make him fall back by climbing onto his lap and straddling his waist with my knees digging into the concrete. I feel like a child as I wrap my arms around his neck and I lay my head on his shoulder as I sniffle into his shirt, his zip up hoodie keeping me warm as I act like a complete idiot.

That shirt probably costs more than my whole house… that just makes me cry harder.

"This was a terrible idea," I hear him whisper against my ear as I hold onto him tighter and let him clamp his arms around me.

I'm just sitting here by a puke puddle holding onto to Draco Malfoy for dear life like an orphaned child. Just another typical Thursday night for me. God, he smells good… and I must smell like… I glance at the puke puddle and then close my eyes. Freaking figures.

"Don't make fun of me," I whisper against his neck. I can't handle it. I'm too sick right now and I know I've given him enough ammunition to make me miserable for life. "Please don't make fun of me."

I feel one of his hands come up to my hair. "I won't," is all he says as he tries to stand up. I refuse to let go. What in the hell am I doing? "Do you really want me to carry you?" he snaps in annoyance and I try to pretend I'm not holding him as I rock back and forth to sooth myself some more. "Fuck," he hisses as he puts his hands on my hips to push me away. "Don't do that." I pull back and look at him in the darkness, his eyes… he looks deadly. "If you know what's good for you, you will not rub against me like that again."

I gulp and nod my head as I start to climb off of him. I hate myself right now. What's wrong with me? If this is what happens when you drink.. I will never ever drink again. My eyes feel heavy as I move away from him and the puddle and I put my head down on the grass, letting it cool my aching head.

"I just want to lay here for a second," I tell him when I hear him get up. He bends down to me again and grabs my arm like he wants to pull me up. "I just want to lay here…"

I barely felt him picking me up, but when I finally opened my eyes again, the sun was shining and I was in a strange bed.

I sit up quickly and then yelp in protest as I grab my head with both hands. I've never felt pain like this. I feel like I'm running into a brick wall repeatedly as loud badly tuned music plays in the back ground. I blink hard a few times and then look around me. I'm in a small room on a loft bed. There's a large half circle window to the right of me and I look at it… there's the lake… I must still be at Pansy's.

I let my feet dangle off of the side of the bed as I put my head down and try to make it not hurt anymore. I bring my hands up to my forehead and clench my eyes shut to deaden the pressure because it kind of feels like my brain is bleeding. I pull the sleeves over my hand and then give a second take to the sweat shirt I'm wearing. This isn't mine, this isn't my house… My parents… I have to get home! Wait… I told them I was staying the night at Luna's… I should be fine… Where's Luna?

The door to the little room opens and I snap my head up as Malfoy walks into the room, holding a glass of water and a vial of gold liquid. I cross my arms and look down, trying to wake up to be more alert.

"How are you feeling?" he asks seriously as he walks over to me and hands me the glass of water. I blush in shame as I remember what happened last night and I gulp it down quickly. I didn't realize how thirsty I was until now. "Do you have a headache?" he asks flatly and I nod my head after I wipe off my mouth with the back of my hand. "Here." He hands me the vial and I eye it suspiciously.

"What is this?" I ask. My voice sounds thick and scratchy. I cough and take another drink to try to make it normal again.

"It's for your hangover," he explains and I toy with it for a few moments before he sighs and uncorks the lid for me. "It's not poison. Drink it," he demands.

I furrow my brows at his forceful tone and I want to snap back at him… but he was nice to me last night and perhaps he's not as bad as I thought. I eye it for a second before throwing my head back and downing the whole thing. It tastes bad, but I don't die right away, so that's always good.

"Where's Luna?" I ask as Draco takes the glass away from me and puts it on the table. I look out of the window again.

"She went home," he says dismissively as the potion starts working. My brain doesn't feel like it's ramming into a brick wall anymore. I'd say that's an improvement.

"She just left me?" I say, feeling hurt by it. She just left me here with him. Wait…. Where did he sleep? I send a panicked look down to my shorts and sigh that they're still on. After playing Never Have I Ever with his friends, I could expect the worst.

"You were passed out. There was no reason for her to stay," he says in that no nonsense voice of his. I frown again as he turns to me and walks towards the bed. Like I mentioned before it's a loft bed and it comes up to his chest. "Pansy told her she would take you home."

"Oh." My next question of course was going to be 'where is Pansy,' but he surprised me by putting his hands on either side of my body so my knees were pressed against his chest.

He is way too close to me and I widen my eyes a fraction as he stars me down with unreadable sliver eyes. I try to scoot back, but there isn't much room on the small bed and my legs are trapped between him and the wooden frame. "If this is what's going to happen when you drink by yourself, I don't want you to do it." Is he just demanding me to do something? I lift my brows as his piercing eyes look right into mine. He looks so serious. "Do you understand?"

"I didn't know it as alcohol," I try to defend myself. I have no idea why.

"Do you understand?" he repeats slowly and I find my eyes narrowing. I might kick him… I'm thinking about kicking him.

"No, I don't understand," I snap as he grips the covers. "You can't tell me what to do. If I want to drink and throw up everywhere than I can because..."

"Shut up," he snaps, spoiling my rant and I feel my temper in flame. I even sit up a bit straighter.

"Knock knock," Pansy peaks her head into the room and smirks as Draco slides back, letting his hands fall to give me space once more as she comes in further. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

"You're not," I state dryly as Malfoy gives me a dirty look. I glare.

"I brought you a change of clothes," she says, laying a skirt and blouse on the bed. "And also some tooth paste and a spare tooth brush." She looks me over as she places a pink tooth brush on top of the mattress. "It looks like you need it."

"What time is it?" I ask as I hop off the bed.

"It's twelve," she replies.

"Twelve?" I say in surprise. "I have to be at work in half an hour," I add, panicked. "Where's the bathroom?"

"Just call in sick," she says as she points to a door on the other side of the room and I run towards it after grabbing the tooth brush and paste. I make haste washing my face and brushing my teeth. Someone knocks on the door and I make a noise to signal them to come in as I spit into the basin and dry my face off with the towel. "Just call in," Pansy repeats as she leans against the door frame with her arms crossed.

"I can't." I say as I shake my head. I need the money, but I don't want her to know that.

"We should hang out again," she says as she walks over to me and stands behind me so she's looking at my reflection. "I know last night was kind of a bust, but we're going shopping tonight. I think you should come."

"Maybe," I say with a shrug even though I know I'm not going. "I work until five thirty though."

She puts some hair over my shoulders and smiles as she starts braiding it. "We'll see," she says with a shrug and then her dark eyes find mine in the mirror again. "You should thank Draco for taking care of you," she states seriously and I look down at the sink. Why would she say that? Does she think I have no manners? Wait, should I even consider saying thank you to him after all the demanding he was doing to me a minute ago. He told me to shut up! "It was very kind of him to take care of you last night like he did. He doesn't just do that for anyone," she says against my ear as she smiles at me and I frown.

"Why is he being so nice to me?" I whisper, almost afraid of the answer. That whole humiliation fear is coming back to me and I can't shake it.

"He's not all bad, you know," she says in that sweet voice of hers as her fingers run through my hair. "And you have gotten quite lovely."

"He told me to shut up," I comment spitefully and she laughs.

"He says that to everyone. You must have said something he didn't like."

Like that makes it right.

I inhale deeply and then put the spare tooth brush down on the sink ledge. "I better go. I have to go home and change before I leave for work."

"Alright," she says with a smile as she steps back so I can walk out of the bathroom.

Malfoy isn't in the odd little bedroom and I grab my wand before carefully leaving the room, stepping over other passed out bodies cuddled up against each other as I try to find the front door. I pass a living room looking place on my way out and I stop a moment when I catch Draco's head of blond hair. He's sitting in one of the chairs with his legs crossed on his knee as he reads the news paper. I glance at the hoodie I'm still wearing and I carefully unzip it and fold it over my arm.

I remember my manners and stare at him until he looks at me.

"Hey," I say and he raises an eyebrow as I put his hoodie over the arm of one of the chairs. "Thanks for… you know…" I say and he nods his head before dismissing me by going back down to his paper.

Okay then. That was simple enough. I leave, not bothering to say anything else. I look behind me as I walk up the walkway towards the main house and realize I was sleeping in the boat house. A boat house that's bigger and better furnished than my own home, actually. I shake it off and run towards the Apparation point. When I get home, I run past my Mom and her questioning gaze as I go to my room and strip out of my clothes. When I'm in my bra and panties, I take a strand of my hair and sniff it.

Ugh. I have to take a shower. I smell _horrible._ I gather up all of my clothes and scurry to the bathroom still in my knickers.

"Jesus Christ Ginny!" Ron scolds as I run past him and Harry. I hear something hit the wall, but I'm far too busy right now to be embarrassed or concerned with them. "Put some clothes on! Harry can see!" he says as I make it to the bathroom.

I'm still upset with the whole 'annoying' comment so I glare at him as I open the bathroom door. "Honestly, Ron," I snap at him as Harry tries to look away. "It's just like a bathing suit."

I take the quickest shower of my life and I don't even bother to dry my hair as I run out of the house, putting my heels on as I stumble along the side walk towards the Apparation gate. When I get to the club, I run up the stairs three at a time because I'm late and I know Del is going to tear me apart.

"Gin!" I ignore the person yelling my name as I continue to run. "Gin, I have your bag!"

I stop. My notebook. I look over my shoulder as Luna jogs to keep up with me in her waitressing uniform. She hands me my duffle bag and I sigh because I had forgotten that I left it at her house. "Thanks," I say out of breath as I sling it over my shoulder.

"No problem. Did you make it home okay?"

I glare at her. "Yes, thanks for leaving me," I tell her hotly and she tilts her head the side.

"They told me…"

"It doesn't matter," I say as I walk towards my station. "I'm late. I'll see you after work."

"Our usual spot?" She calls after me and I wave my hand.

"Yeah, yeah," I say as I run towards the cloak check out.

Without fail, there's Del, standing in front of the counter with Nadia looking sympathetic behind her. "You're late again," she says sternly and I tug at my wet hair, putting it in a quick bun as I try to think up a reason.

"I'm sorry," I end up saying as I let my hands fall to my sides. "I lost track of time."

"One more time and don't even bother coming in, Ginevra," she says and I nod my head. "I run a tight ship here."

"Yes, Del," I whisper and she gives me one more look before walking off.

"I'm sorry, Ginny," Nadia says as I go behind the counter and I put my duffle bag down. "I tried to tell her you were in the bathroom but she insisted on staying and waiting for you."

"It's okay," I say with a shrug. "I was late. I deserve her wraith," I state fairly as I smooth out my dress.

"You're hair is still wet," she says as she eyes me. I sigh.

"I know," I tell her as I walk to the counter and nervously fiddle with one of the pens. "How long do you work today?"

"Until three," she says. "They're having some kind of luncheon so they thought it would busy. That's why we're overlapping so much today. I think Mrs. Carl is coming in later to finish up."

I rarely ever see Mrs. Carl. She's a very old woman with arthritis who works here only when she feels like it. "That should be fun," I say softly.

"She always asks me when I'm getting married," Nadia says as she takes a cloth and starts wiping off the counter. "She's really a prudish old bat."

I shrug as I start cleaning things up as well, just to avoid talking to her. I find Nadia extremely boring.

"Nadie!" One of the creeper old men walks up with a wide grin on his face. "I'm so glad to see you working today. I've missed you the past two weeks."

"Hello, Mr. Smith," she says with a smile and then her eyes slide to mine. "Ginny is working today as well."

I've never seen a man look as put out as he does. Why does it bother him so much that I'm working as well? "So… no special service today?" he asks like a child and I'm confused so I look at Nadia's profile as she blushes.

"Perhaps later," she says quickly as she takes his gulf clubs. She walks them to the lockers and takes the tip he gives her after she hands him his ticket.

"Later," he confirms before walking away with disappointment littering each step.

"What was that all about?" I ask curiously as she flicks some hair over her shoulder. "What does 'special service' mean?"

She gives me a look before turning and putting her full attention on me. "Sometimes you can make a lot of money here, Ginny," she says and I furrow my brows as she shakes her head like I was stupid for not understanding. "Nevermind. How's your family?"

Family. That's always safe waters. We barely spoke to each other as we worked. Every once and a while she would tell me a story about one of her kids but that was typically the extent of our conversation until Mrs. Carl came in to take over for her. Mrs. Carl was even more boring than Nadia if that was possible and I was counting every second on the ticking clock until I could go home. When that time finally came, I ran out of there like a bat out of hell, slinging my bag over my shoulder and day dreaming about the nap I was going to take once I get home.

I start heading towards the back entrance to meet up with Luna, but Pansy and Daphne Greengrass fall into my line of vision from the opposite side of the hall. I stop walking when I see them and toy with the strap of my bag as I try to decide what to do. Should I pretend I don't see them and slip away? I don't want to go shopping with them today and I'm really looking forward to taking a nap. Daphne is waving me down as she grabs onto Pansy's hand to get my attention and I know that plan isn't going to happen.

"Ginny! We thought we missed you," she says once she's close enough. "I've never been back here before," she says as she looks around the hallway and then back at me with bright eyes. "Do you like my outfit?" she asks as she grabs the fabric with her slim fingers. "I'm trying out the bohemian chic look this week."

"Yeah," I say as I look her over. She looks well rested with her honey blond hair in loose curls down her back and a leather head band around her head like a girl from the seventies. She's wearing a white peasant dress with cowboy boots and long beaded jewelry. Bohemian chic, I guess. "It looks nice."

She gives me an awkward hug and I lift my shoulders to slink out of it. "What are… " I look at Pansy. She's wearing a more modern take on fashion with a skin tight navy dress with a bold orchid print. "What are you guys doing back here?" I ask as I step back and look around. This is the employee exit, they shouldn't be here.

"I told you we're going shopping," Pansy answers as she takes my hand and starts dragging me the opposite way of the exit I was going to take.

"We're going out tonight," Daphne says as she reaches into her small purple purse and takes out some lip gloss. She reapplies it on her fuller than natural lips as we walk. "We need good outfits."

"You know, I'm kind of tired. I should go home," I say as I try to pull back but they gather on both sides of me and grab both of my arms.

"Of course, you have to come. I know the perfect little boutique that would fit your style perfectly," Daphne says as she smiles over my head at Pansy.

"You'll love it," Pansy affirms and I shake my head.

"I told Luna I'd meet her out back," I say looking over my shoulder at the exit that keeps on getting further and further away.

"I don't think she'll mind if you leave with us," Pansy adds, looking at me with perfectly sculpted eyebrows. "She didn't mind leaving you last night."

I think on that for a second. She's right of course. Luna did just leave me with people I barely knew… and with Draco Malfoy of all people!

"Well, I need to tell my Mom…."

"Okay, let's floo her then," she says as we walk towards the main hall of the building. I rarely see the foyer of the main hall and I had nearly forgotten how beautiful it was. She pulls me towards the front desk and taps the bell on the counter. "We need to use a fireplace, please," Pansy says to the man that approaches.

"Okay right this way, Miss Parkinson." I follow them towards the official fireplace rimmed with marble and I watch as the man turns the knob on the side of it to turn it on. Daphne grabs a handful of floo powder and she gives it to me with a bright smile.

"Go on then," she says as I throw the powder into the flames and I stick my head in as I say my parents address.

"Mom?" I call as I look into my parent's living room through the green flames.

"Ginny?" I hear Ron say around a mouth full of food as he walks over to the fire place and kneels down with a chicken leg in his right hand. "What are you doing?"

"Will you tell Mom and Dad that I'm going shopping with some friends?"

"Friends?" he says as he chomps into the chicken and I make a disgusted face at it. Does he ever stop eating? "Who are you going with?"

"No one you need to be concerned about," I snap, angry that he had to question that I even had friends. "Just tell them I'll be home later."

"But wait…" he says but I pull out before he can speak to me anymore. He just annoys me.

"So?" Pansy asks as she leans on her toes. "What did they say?"

I fake a smile. "I can go," I tell her and Daphne claps her hands as I stand up and clean myself of the soot from the fireplace.

"Ginevra, is that you?" I hear Del's stern voice and I reluctantly turn around. "What are you doing out here? You know you're not allowed…"

"She's with us," Daphne says as she takes my arm and smiles at my very hard looking boss.

"My shift is over," I explain as Del looks down at me with unreadable dark eyes.

"Employees are not allowed to use the front fireplaces…. There are some in the break room you could use if you wish to."

My cheeks burn and Pansy crosses her arms. "She's with us," she repeats Daphne's words with a dark brow lifted. "And since I'm a paying patron I can bring whoever I want to whatever I want. Come on, Ginny," Pansy says as she pulls me away. She sends a look down to Del's wrist. For the first time since I started working here I noticed she was wearing a yellow ribbon. The way Pansy was looking at it… at her… it made me feel bad and I tried to convey my feelings through my expression but Del looked as hard as ever as I let myself get pulled away.

"This is going to be so fun!" Daphne sings as we go outside.

I send one more look over my shoulder at Del as she stands in the doorway. She has her arms crossed and she looks mad and…. Worried?

How strange.

* * *

"Try this on."

Daphne throws another dress over the changing wall and I sigh as it lands on my head. I pull it off and stare at the size on the tag.

"Daphne," I throw it back. "I can't fit into something that small. Stop giving me such little sizes." I'm not like you, I want to add.

"Well, you don't look that big," she says and I roll my eyes as I tug on the tank top she had forced me to try. It's yellow and it looks terrible against my skin tone.

"Here, I found the perfect thing!" Pansy throws a gray dress over the wall and I pull it back to get a good look at it. It's some type of jersey knit, so it won't be as freaking tight as the things Daphne has been giving me.

It's a soft gray color in the back and the front is made up of silver shimmering beads. I kind of like it actually. I tug off the other clothes and slide it over my head until my arms slide through the sleeves. I tug it into place and then I look at the mirror. I actually don't hate it. Of course, it's way shorter than I would have liked but I thought it was fun.

"Let's see it," Pansy says and I carefully open the door and step out. The loud music from the shop beats loudly in the background as I walk over to the three way mirror at the end of the hall with Daphne and Pansy eyeing me.

"What do you think?" I ask self consciously as I check myself out from every angle. I've never just tried on clothes with girls before. Of course, I only had brothers and Hermione and Luna… well…. They aren't that type of girl really. I was starting to feel normal.

"It's hot," Daphne says as she walks over to me with a few silver bangles in her hand. She puts them around my wrist and smirks at the mirror. "Bring the shoes," she says to Pansy.

Pansy comes up holding sky high black leather booties that have studs on them and I shake my head. "I can't wear those," I say as she places them by my feet. "I'll fall over."

"Just try them on," Pansy says with a sigh as I slip my feet into them. "It completes the look."

I turn around and look over my shoulder. It makes my legs and back look… great.

"Oh, it's very rocker chic," Daphne says with a smile as I turn back around and eye myself while fingering the beads on the dress. "You must get it and wear it tonight, Ginny. You just must."

"I don't know," I say as I reach under my arm and I pull out the price tag to have a look. My mouth dries up and I shake my head. "I don't really like it that much," I lie because I cannot spend that much money on one article of clothing.

"Daphne, will you go pick out some earrings?" Pansy says lightly, but her eyes stay trained on my face. Daphne flutters out of the room and Pansy forces me to look at her by continuing to stare at me.

"You look great in the dress, Ginny," she says seriously. "If you can't…. " she shakes her head and then she smiles. "Let me get it for you as a new friend gift."

My ears burn again… just like they did when Harry bought me the ice cream cone. "No, don't do that… I don't know if I like it that much, is all," I say as I look back at the mirror. The more I deny myself the more I find myself wanting it.

Maybe I could get it. I haven't spent any money this summer and I could ask Del to give me some more hours to make up for it….and if I do go anywhere with these girls tonight I know the clothes that I do have won't really work. What could it hurt?

"No," I say with a head shake and then I smile at Pansy. It's going to feel good to buy something I actually want for a change because I can afford it where my parent never could. "I think I'm going to get it," I tell her as I walk back to the changing room to grab my duffle bag that has my unused gringotts card.

"Just wear it out," Pansy says as I close the door to the changing room. "We won't have much time to get ready before we leave for Herme's."

"What is Herme's?" I ask curiously as I kick off the shoes and slide the bangles from my wrist. I look at the price on the bottom of the shoes and pale once more. How can shoes cost that much?

"It's a cool little club in London," she answers as I slide on the clunky black heels I use for work.

"Will I be able to get in?" I ask worriedly. I'm not of age yet and most clubs card now.

I hear her scoff as I sling my bag over my shoulder. "Of course you will. I've been going since I was fifteen and I was never denied."

"Okay," I say as I walk out with the dress still on and my Gringotts card firmly in my hand. "Let's go then."

I've never spent so much on one thing before and I was kind of nervous about it as I took off the tag and handed it to the cashier. I nearly fainted as I swiped the card and imagined the amount being taken out of my account. I held my breath as I signed the receipt and once the transaction was finished and the dress was officially mine I felt…. I felt… _good_.

I just bought something with my own money. Something that was nice and expensive from a cool shop with cool people and loud music. I feel pretty cool myself. I find a smile on my face as Daphne and I walk out of the shop. Pansy stays back and when she comes back out, she has a shopping bag in her hand.

"Oh what did you get?" Daphne asks as she tries to grab the bag, but Pansy pulls it away and hands it to me.

"A new friendship present," she says as I take it from her. I give her an odd look as I open the bag and see the box for the leather high heeled booties that went so well with the outfit.

"Pansy…" I say with a head shake as my throat becomes tight. These cost more than the dress did. "I can't accept this."

I try to hand it back but she pushes it at my chest. "Come on, Ginny. You needed them for the outfit. Just think of it as an early birthday present or something."

I feel my eyes water despite of myself and I try to hide it. "Thank you," I say sincerely as I grip the bag in my hands.

"Now, don't get all sappy on me," she says as Daphne squeezes my hand.

When we got back to Pansy's house to get ready, I thought about flooing my parents again to let them know what I was doing… but I just couldn't. I knew my Mom would make me tell her the truth and then I would have to come home once they knew my plans of going to a club. I didn't want to deal with it. Pansy's room of course was magnificent, with a large bed covered in plush pillows and the most comfortable looking blanket. Her room even has a sitting room attached to it and a walk in closet that was organized by color and function… she even has a closet for shoes… Shoes… can you imagine that?

I would roll my eyes at it if I wasn't in so much awe. Pansy did my hair and Daphne did my make up before they got ready for the evening and when I looked at myself in the mirror I barely recognized my reflection. I looked like a girl. Not like a little girl with chubby cheeks with an annoying crush on Harry Potter, but I looked like a girl just turning into a woman and I was pleased with the effect. I stared at myself in the mirror for a majority of the time as Pansy and Daphne got ready, marveling at the makeup and the hair that the two had given me so effortlessly. I'm going to have to make them show me how to do it.

"Ready to go?" Pansy asks as she stuffs her wand into a small velvet clutch and she winks at me as I nod my head. "Let's roll then."

I have never been to a club, so when I was pulled into the large building with the colored lights and revolving dance floor, I stopped and just stared for a few seconds before Daphne snapped me out of my trance. The place was packed and I kept on rubbing up against people as Pansy took my hand and walked us through the maze of bodies towards the tall tables on the second floor. This club seemed pretty dark as well, with loud bumping music that thumped my heart and made my ears ring with each step. I saw Millicent Bulstrode in a tight sexy dress and one of the other girls from last night holding a table for us. I tried not to look disappointed as they waved us down.

"Thanks for saving us seats, Millie," Pansy says as we approach the table.

Millicent takes one look at me and sighs. "Whatever," she replies with a shrug and Pansy narrows her eyes.

"What's got into you tonight?" Pansy asks. I want to listen to this fight, but Daphne grabs my arm.

"Oh, do see that man right there, Ginny," she says as she points to the middle aged bartender with a dragon tattoo on his neck.

"Yes, what about him?" I ask as Pansy and Millicent continue to bicker with each other out of the corner of my eye.

"Oh, isn't he to die for," she asks as she bounces on her toes. The bartender in question looks up in our direction and she waves at him. "He gives me free drinks all the time," she says with a smile after he smirks at her before going back to mixing a drink. "I'm going to go see what time he gets off tonight. Do you want to come with me?"

"Um…" I look at all the people down there I'd have to walk through. "No, I think I'll stay right here."

"Okay," she says as she watches him. "I'll be right back." She hands me a small silver purse. "Watch this for me will you?" she asks as she fixes her hair and rearranges her breasts before walking towards the steps so she can get to him.

"Stop it!" Pansy hisses and I turn back to their conversation once Daphne is out of view. "Just stop talking."

"No," Millicent says with a dangerous scowl on her face. "I don't understand why we have to go out of our way when this was all Draco's—"

"Shut the fuck up," Pansy seethes and Millicent narrows her eyes even more. "Stop talking or I'll shove your drink down your throat."

I feel really uncomfortable right about now.

"Really?" Millicent sneers as Pansy clenches her fist. "Isn't that what your Mom does after she's done taking a hit," she says and Pansy inhales quickly. Apparently a line had been crossed because even the other friend who was sitting at the table let her eyes go wide. "Does she even know who you are anymore?"

Pansy flares her nostrils and I'm waiting for her to say something back… or even throw a punch. But she doesn't. Instead she picks up her clutch and spins on her heels after sending Millicent the dirtiest look in the book. Then she walks away. Millicent's dark eyes turn to mine and she levels me with a hateful glare as I grip Daphne's purse.

"What makes you so special?" she snaps and I don't even bother to answer as I go to look for Pansy.

I find her in the bathroom, trying to fix her makeup with a tissue. I step inside and carefully walk up to the counter. I watch her reflection in the mirror as she dabs the eyeliner from under her eyes. It looks like she's been crying and I bite the corner of my lip as I walk closer.

"Are you alright?" I ask softly and she jumps before exhaling slowly once she realizes it's me.

"Yes, I'm fine," she says shortly as she throws the tissue away and she starts washing her hands. "I'm sorry I left you with that troll… I would have killed her if she stayed a second longer."

"What she said really upset you," I point out. I had seen Pansy get in many fights where she dished out some cruel words and I've seen her take the worst of it… but I had never seen her look so sad or so human as she does right now.

"Of course it did," she says tiredly as she tries her hands on a paper towel. "That whore knows my Mom is in rehab," she spits out and then she sighs as she looks at me in the mirror. "She's turned into such a bitch since she stopped being fat."

I snort at that… the flat way she said it just seemed funny to me and the corner of her lips turned up as I smiled.

"Are you ready to dance," she says after a few seconds of silence. She throws away the paper towel and then takes my hand again as she starts walking out of the bathroom. "I am ready to dance."

She pulls me to the dance floor and she immediately starts getting into the rhythm of the music. I'm not half as lucky. I had never just danced like this before and I tried not to be awkward at it. I just kept on copying what Pansy was doing until eventually I found my niche. I was rolling my hips and moving my arms… and I was having a lot of fun doing it. I look at Pansy and smile until I feel hands on my hips and someone grinding up against my back.

I stiffen and look over my shoulder at whoever decided to invade my personal dancing space. It was a guy, a very cute dark haired guy in fact, and he smirks at me as I raise my eyebrows.

"Charles," he says in greeting and I smile.

"Ginny," I answer and I start dancing again until Pansy notices.

She makes a face and comes closer to me and my new dance partner. Then she taps his shoulder and makes a shooing motion with her hand. "Off limits," she tells him and I give her a strange look as she glares at him. "Go away." He doesn't move right away and Pansy takes my arm to pull me behind her, away from Charles. "Go on. Go find someone else."

He shakes his head before walking off and when Pansy turns towards me, I raise an eyebrow. "What was that?" I ask as she starts dancing again.

"What was what?" she asks breathlessly as she moves to the music.

I stop dancing and cross my arms. "Off limits?" I repeat with a laugh. "I thought he was cute."

"He wasn't cute. I was saving you," she says like I was silly. "Besides, tonight is girl's night."

"Tell that to Daphne," I laugh as I point to the bar where Daphne is sitting on the counter, letting the bartender take a shot from between her breasts.

"Well…." Pansy trails off and then she laughs as she looks at me. "There is only so much we can do for that one," she says with a smile.

"But that guy is so old," I say in fake disgust and Pansy smirks as she takes a strand of my hair and she twists it in between her fingers.

"Oh, Ginny," she sighs. "You're so innocent."

"You'd be surprised," I joke and she grins.

"I love surprises," she says before we start dancing again.

By the end of the night I decided that I liked Pansy and Daphne very much, and I was glad that I had added a few more friends to my arsenal.

I didn't get home until one o'clock in the morning, though.

I was waiting for the yells and disappointed looks of my parents as soon as I got back, but they weren't up. In fact the house was surprisingly bare and I smirked at that fact as I walked through the house in the darkness. I carefully creep up the stairs and once I reach the comfort of my own bedroom I fall down onto the mattress and smile up at the ceiling as I remember the music and the dancing and the beautiful people at the club. I let my duffle bag hit the floor as I smirk into the darkness.

The light clicks on and I jump up in a panic, thinking my parents are going to ambush me this way, but it's just Hermione standing there, with her arms crossed like she was angry. I forgot she was sleeping in my room and I sigh as I sit on the edge of the bed to unzip the expensive shoes.

"Where have you been?" she asks with an arched eyebrow as she takes in my dress and her eyes linger on the sky high shoes. "And why are you dressed like that?"

"I've been out," I say with a shrug as I slide the shoes off. "Are my parents going to kill me tomorrow?" I ask seriously as she unfolds her arms and stares at me like I was a stranger.

She sighs and sits down on her cot. "No," she says tiredly. "After you talked to Ron he jumbled out something about friends. I figured you were staying with Luna again so I told them that." She eyes my new dress and shoes again. "Have you been staying with Luna?"

"I went to a club tonight," I tell her as I sit up straight, ignoring her question because I know my answer would just upset her. "A real club… There was dancing and everything."

"You had fun?" she says and I nod my head as I think about the music and Daphne and Pansy.

"Yes, I had a lot of fun."

"That's good… I'm glad you had a good time…. But don't you think you are a little young to be out at a club until one in the morning?" she asks, crossing her arms again and I shake my head as I stand up and go to my closet to pick out some pj's.

"I'm tired," is all I say before leaving her there to take a shower. When I get back into the room, the light is off and she's laying on her cot. I know she's not asleep, but I don't bother saying anything as I crawl into my bed and slide under my covers.

I smile as I stare at the wall and I fall asleep with the music from the club still thumping in my ears.

* * *

"Ginny…" I groan and pull the pillow out from under my head so I can over my ears. "Gin, wake up. Your Mom said you had to get up now."

"Just a few more minutes," I mumble tiredly as I yawn against my sheet.

I nearly scream when Hermione yanks the blankets off of me and I find it in me to move the pillow and glare at her.

"It is one o'clock in the afternoon," she says, trying not to laugh as I rub sleep from my eyes. "You're Mom said to wake you up or she was going to take you to St. Mungo's for being in a coma."

"Whatever," I mumble as I stand up from the warm bed and stretch my body out, still yawning and still trying to hold onto sleep.

"Whatever," Hermione repeats with a head shake as I trudge to my closet to pick out clothes for the day. "We have chores to do today."

I groan again as I change and I take my time going down the stairs, with Hermione trailing behind me, looking amused. "I'm glad you decided to join the living, Ginny," my Mom says when I reach the kitchen. I grab an orange and start peeling it as I sit at the table. "We have a lot of things to do today so don't get comfortable."

"But it's my day off," I whine as I glare at her.

"Everyone who stays here does chores," she says and I narrow my eyes. "You know that."

"Dad doesn't do chores because he works… I'm the only other person here with a job. Why is he getting special treatment," I spit out and she gives me one of her best Mother glares before I sigh in defeat. "Fine," I snap tiredly as I eat the orange quickly and wash my hands of the stickiness. "What torture must I endure today?"

"I let you sleep in today," she says in answer to my tone. "There is no need to be hateful."

"What do you want me to do?" I ask, trying to keep the attitude from my voice as Hermione picks up a wash cloth so she can dry the dishes my Mom is washing.

She glances at the clock. "You're brother and Harry are doing yard work right now," she says as she looks out the window that's located above the sink. "Why don't you bring them something to drink and then you can start cleaning the living room."

"Fine," I sigh as I walk over to the fridge and I start scanning the selection. We have lemonade…. I shake off the thought of the alcoholic lemonade I drank that made me act like such an idiot and I pull the pitcher out as Hermione walks towards me with two glasses. "Are you coming with me?" I ask and she nods her head as she puts a few ice cubes in each glass. I pour some lemonade into each.

"I need a break," she whispers as she sends a look to my mother. "I've been in this kitchen all day."

"She's a real bear sometimes, isn't she?" I whisper back and she laughs as we start walking towards the back door, once outside we start walking around the back where Hermione said that Ron and Harry were doing the work my dictator of a Mom assigned them.

"Oh…" Hermione stops walking and I glance at her before following her line of vision. My brother has his shirt off and he's tucked it into his back pocket as he tries to dislodge a large stick that looks stuck in the blades of the lawn mower.

"Fuck," I hear him sigh in frustration as he stands up and kicks the machine with his foot.

"Oh, my," Hermione blushes and she looks at me with wide eyes.

It's gross because it's my brother, but I understand so I give her an encouraging smile.

"Here," I tell her as I hand her one of the glasses and nudge her shoulder. "Have fun with that."

She nods her head and starts walking over to my brother with purposeful steps. "I doubt kicking it helps much, Ron," she says and I watch as he glares at her.

"Where's Harry?" I ask because I don't want to sit through this awkward sexual tension that's between the two of them any longer then I have to.

"He's mowing down by the garden," Ron answers.

I don't even bother saying anything else as I start walking that way. My Mom has been growing her own vegetables for a while now and she has a small garden at the bottom of our hill where the soil is the richest. That's where I find Harry, wearing a pair of jeans and a Gryffindor t-shirt that has the sleeves cut off. I've seen him practice Quidditch in that shirt more than one time and I smile at him when he finally notices me. He stops the mower and he takes off his work gloves before running his fingers through his messy hair. He's sweating, so the sweat makes his hair hold that ridiculous pose longer than it normally would have.

"Are you thirsty?" I ask as I approach.

He puts the work gloves in his pocket and nods his head. "It's so bloody hot out today," he says tiredly as I hand him the ice cold drink. He tilts his head back to take a drink and ends up downing the whole thing in a matter of seconds. When he's done, he makes a sighing sound before wiping off his mouth with the back of his hand. "Thank you, Gin," he says and I smile again as I take the glass from him. "I really needed that."

"You're welcome," I tell him. He has a few blades of glass on his face and I look at them as takes off his glasses to pinch the bridge of his nose. "You have…." He looks at me and I give him a gentle smile again. "There's some grass on your face," I tell him as I lift my hand to brush them away with my fingers. "Got it," I whisper as he looks down at me.

"Thank you," he says again in a whisper as I let my fingers linger on his face. He's looking down at me so intently now and I stare at his lips as I bring my hand down to his shoulder. I wish he would kiss me. This would just be so perfect if he would just kiss me. I keep on staring at him, tilting my head back a little to give him an open invitation, but then he steps back and puts his glasses on quickly as he goes to the stupid freaking lawn mower, making my hand drop. "I have a lot to get done still," he says awkwardly as I stare at his profile in disappointment. "Thanks again, Ginny."

"My Mom wanted me to bring it to you," I snap, disappointed and upset by the slight. "It wasn't my idea so thank her," I say before turning on my heels and stomping back towards the house.

"Are you alright?" Mom asks as I walk back into the house.

"I'm fine," I answer heatedly as I stomp into the living room to clean.

I go into the kitchen half an hour later for a late lunch and I refuse to look at Harry as I glare down at my sandwich. Hermione finishes first and she retires to my bedroom to finish reading a book and Harry awkwardly leaves the table as well, muttering something about chess…. Leaving me, my mother, and Ron around the table, barely even looking at each other.

I spend the rest of the day trying to avoid him and trying not to feel like the biggest fool for putting myself in a hurtful situation like that. Harry doesn't like me, and I don't like him. I've decided that and it's final… at least… if I keep thinking it I hope it will be soon because I hate feeling this way.

Right after dinner, Hermione, Ron, and Harry disappear again for one of their secret meetings in Ron's room and that inflames my temper as well. Later that night when Hermione creeps back into my room… I pretend to be asleep when she whispers my name.

* * *

"Who is that outside?" Ron asks as he looks out the kitchen window. I put my stupid sandwich down and go over to him to look as well and I smile when I see Pansy and Daphne outside of the gate, both on bicycles.

"Wait a minute," I tell them as I run outside to great my new friends. "What are you guys doing here?" I ask as I approach. It's been two days since the whole clubbing thing and I was beginning to fear I was never going to hear from them again.

Daphne gets off of her bike and smiles at me. "We were going to come up and knock, but your wards wouldn't let us," she says as she taps the gate for proof. "We're going on a bike trip today and wanted you to come."

I look at Pansy in her green plaid capri's and pastel colored polo shirt as she pushes her sunglasses up to stare at my house. I blush in embarrassment as I look at it to. It's so sad looking compared to her lake house.

"Let me get dressed first," I say quickly as I run inside, trying not to feel ashamed because of how poor my family is. Daphne had her hair in braids and she was wearing a simple cotton sun dress. They both looked posh and pretty so I dig through my closet until I find a tennis style dress that my Mom had made me last year. I put it on and smooth down the collar as I grab a pair of my white trainers because I don't want to look out of place next to them. I already put my hair up in a high pony tail this morning for work and I look at myself in the mirror for a few seconds before grabbing one of the blue ribbons I usually tie around my wrist for work. I tie it in a bow in my hair and then smile at my reflection. Preppy and posh. I run down the stairs two at a time.

"I'll be back Mom!" I yell, but she calls me back before I can leave.

"Ginny, perhaps you should invite Hermione to go with you," she says with a pointed look.

"Why?" I ask because I know there is no way Hermione could come with us. "She never asks me to go when she hangs out with Harry and Ron," I snap back and my Mom only shakes her head in disappointment as I leave the house.

I shouldn't feel bad about it. I have my own friends now... just like Ron wanted.

I go to the shed to get my own bike out and I groan when I see it. I don't remember it looking this childish. It's pink, a _glittering_ pink in fact, with a white wicker basket attached to the front… but the kicker is the pink and white streamers that fly out from the handle bars. _Wonderful_. I start to roll it out of the shed, but the back tire is flat, so I dig through some of my Dad's muggle things until I find the air pump. As I'm pumping air into the flat, the door to the shed opens and I squint against the light as Ron comes in looking cross like usual.

"You're not really going to go with them, are you?" he asks and I glare down at the tire as I pump more air into it.

"So what if I am?" I ask spitefully, already on the defensive. A part of me knew he wouldn't be happy when he found out about my new friendship, and I was ready for it. "They're my friends."

"Since when?" He asks with his hands on his hips.

"Since I decided I liked them," I tell him harshly and he blinks a few times before shaking his head .

"Ginny…" he says slowly like I was stupid. He lets his arms drop and he approaches me as I put the pump down. The tire is full now. "Those girls…. Parkinson and Greengrass… they're mean girls, Ginny. They're going to eat you alive."

"You don't even know them," I say as I stand up straight and put my hands on the handle bars so I can steer it away from this shed and from my irritating older brother. "They're actually quite nice."

"They're not being nice to you because they like you," he says sympathetically like I was some idiot who wouldn't know real affection. "Why are you even hanging out with them? How do you know them?"

I shrug. "I started talking to Pansy at work… we just decided to hang out is all."

"You just decided," he says with a head shake. "That just doesn't happen that way, Ginny. They have to have an alternative motive planned. I know it."

"Is it so unbelievable that people might actually like me?" I ask, my cheeks heating up and he narrows his eyes.

"They're probably only hanging out with you to hurt Harry," he says and I give him a hateful look as I go to pass by him, but he puts his foot in front of the tire before I can get outside. "You're like a sister to him. They're probably going to hurt you to get to him."

Little sister. Hmf. "Not everything is about Harry Potter!" I yell as I stomp on his foot.

When he jumps back I take the opportunity to bolt out of the shed with my brows furrowed in anger and my shoulder bent down on the defense. Jerk face.

"Ginny!" he calls after me as I approach my friends with stiff and angry steps. "Ginny!"

"Leave me alone!" I yell over my shoulder and when I turn back to Daphne and Pansy they both are eyeing me with raised eyebrows as I unlatch the gate and walk my bike out.

"Everything alright?" Pansy asks carefully as I fume about the conversation with my idiot of a brother.

"Yes, it's fine," I answer as I swing my leg over the seat and I pull the skirt of my dress down a bit more to cover my modesty.

"Oh, Ginny," Daphne says with a smile, oblivious to my anger. "I love your bike!" she looks at it longingly and then back at her own blue mountain bike. "It's pink and everything. Pansy, look," she says as she nods to her friend. "It sparkles!"

"That's enough of that," Pansy snaps as she jumps on her bike and kicks up the kick stand. "Follow me, Gin."

I kick off and started pedaling after her. I wasn't as stable at first, but I eventually got my bearings. I don't think I've been on a bike since…. Since I was twelve maybe but it felt good to ride once again. I had no idea where we were going, so I let Pansy and Daphne lead as we followed the dirt roads through my village and the small forest on the outskirts of it all. When we headed towards Yellow Springs I figured we were probably going to ride through her neighborhood.

"So, do you like anyone, Ginny?" Pansy asks casually as we enter the very secluded part of Yellow Springs surrounded by large trees and winding roads.

"What do you mean?" I ask as we pass by the first house. It's a large white mansion with a tennis court. I shake my head and turn away.

"Boys," she says with a laugh as Daphne weaves back and forth a head of us. "Do you have a crush on anyone?"

I shrug as I think of Harry and my decision not to like him anymore. A decision that I've always struggled with but I think of the way he had rejected me before and I narrow my eyes. "Not really."

"Not really? Does that leave room for possibility?" she pushes forward, eyeing me critically. "You dated Dean Thomas recently, haven't you?"

"Uh, yeah," I say, because I didn't think she would even know that. "But that didn't last long. We just didn't like each other like that."

She nods her head and turns back to the road as we pass more large houses and Daphne points to one as we ride by it. "That's Zabini's," she calls back to us and I look at the house in interest. "Do you want to see if he's home right now, Pans?" Daphne asks as she swirls her bike around so she can fall into line beside us again.

"Not right now," Pansy says, but I did notice her look over her shoulder at the house before we turned down another road.

"Do you all have summer houses here?" I ask uncomfortably.

"Just about," Pansy answers. "There are only a few of us who don't."

"Me included," Daphne smiles at me as she raises one hand.

"But we're always staying at each other's places so it really doesn't matter," she finishes.

We keep riding, but when we get towards a large wrought iron gate, I stop my bike and stare at the house safe on the other side of it. "That," I say as I rest my feet on the ground in front of the gate. "Is a beautiful house," I finish as Daphne and Pansy stop their bikes beside mine as well. It's large like the other ones, but this lake house was huge, with green shutters and large windows that surrounded the whole front of it. There was also a large concrete fountain in the middle of the walk around in front of the house. It was nearly breath taking.

"You should see Malfoy Manor," Pansy smirks from my side. "It's ten times as grand as this."

"This is Draco's?" I ask softly and she nods her head.

Figures the biggest and most beautiful house belongs to the Malfoys. Life is not fair.

Suddenly, there was a pop behind us and we all turned around to see Draco Malfoy standing there, wearing a well fitted black suit and tie.

When he saw us, he removed his sunglasses and lifted a brow. "What are you doing?" he asks as he puts his wand in his pocket and walks towards the gate. We move our bikes to let him through and I put my head down. Still afraid of him and still embarrassed about what happened the last time I saw him.

"Ginny was just admiring your home," Pansy says smugly as she smiles at him. I blush. "Were you at the ministry?" she asks curiously as he punches a few numbers into the combination on the gate.

He nods.

"Alright, well we won't keep you," they share a look before his eyes slide to mine. I look away quickly. "See you later," she says as she takes off on her bike.

"Bye, Draco!" Daphne sings before taking off as well.

I follow suit and I put my feet on the pedals to follow, but they took off so quickly and my bike is messing up. It feels like something has a hold of my handle bars and I fight with it for a few yards before I lose control and I end up falling off of it with the heavy bike landing on top of me.

"Ow," I whine as I kick the bike to the side. I look around for Pansy and Daphne but they're nowhere in sight. I hiss as I look down at my knee. It's all scuffed up and bleeding and there is dirt and small pebbles sticking to it. "Oh, ow," I repeat as my eyes water.

I blow on it to make it feel better and I try not to cry before standing up to find my friends. "Are you alright?" A shadow falls over me and I sigh at my helpless situation once again.

"I'm fine," I say as I wipe my tears away. I pick up my bike and hiss again when my hurt knee burns.

"Come inside with me," he says and I look at him. "I'll heal it."

"No," I say stiffly as I start walking the bike along the road. I just need to walk it off. That's it.

"Why not?" he snaps in irritation and I glare at him.

"Because I'm fine."

"You're being stubborn," he says. "Come inside."

Again with the demands. I ignore him, and just keep on walking, until it hurts too much to handle and I just close my eyes and inhale deeply as I try not to focus on the pain. Where did Pansy and Daphne go?

"Come inside with me," he says and I look at him again in his smart suit and silver eyes. "I won't offer again."

I look around me once more. I have no idea where I am really or how to get back and my knee really does hurt. "Alright," I tell him stiffly, angry that I agreed. "But make it fast."

He walks over to the gate and pushes it open so I can walk through. "You're welcome," he says as I set my bike against the fountain's edge and wait for him to open his front door.

I try not to look at anything on the inside because I know I'll just fall in love with it and feel bad about my own life, so I ignore everything as I follow him into the kitchen. There's a breakfast nook on the right side of the room and he takes his jacket off and sets it on one of the chairs before patting the top of the table.

"Take a seat," he says as he rolls up his sleeves and walks over to one of the many oak wood cabinets. I obey and hop on the table as I look around me. There's some home decorating magazine on the table beside me so I take that and flip it open so I have something to while he does whatever it is he's doing. "You're awfully trusting," he says as he pulls out two bottles. I glance at him. "To just come into my house like this. I could kill you and no one would know."

I open my mouth for a reply to that, but I can't say anything as he walks towards me and scoots a chair out so it's right in front of me.

"Luckily for you," he says as he takes a seat and grabs my ankle to pull it to his lap. "Those aren't my intentions," he adds as he unties my tennis shoe and slips it off my foot. He looks down at my toes before glancing at me. "You have such delicate looking feet," he notices before loosening his tie and picking up one of the bottles.

He uncorks the lid and dabs a little bit of the liquid onto a rag and then he puts his hand on the back of my knee to pull my leg more towards him. "This is going to hurt for a moment," he says. When he goes to put the cloth to my skin, I block him with my hand and shake my head. "What?" he snaps with a frown.

"I don't…." I clear my throat and push his hand back. "I can do it."

"No," is all he says as he holds my gaze with his intense eyes. "Do you trust me?"

"No," I answer honestly and he smirks.

"That's probably best," he says as he grabs my knee again. "Come on," he coaxes. "Be a good girl and let Daddy fix it."

Oh, that's not right. I shake my head, but I let him do it anyway and I yelp when as the liquid burns my wound.

"It only hurts for a moment," he says as he cleans off the blood and debris that was still clinging to my skin. "This makes sure that you won't get infected."

I watch him as he works and I stop wanting to cry after the pain goes away. Draco has long beautiful fingers that look confident with each movement and I work my way up to his face as he puts the other potion on the cut to officially seal it. His hair is shorter now than I remember it being and it falls over his brows as he works. He has a straight nose, a narrow jaw, and clear skin with a faint blush to his cheeks. Something happens, I realize my heart is racing, and my eyes widen in horror. Oh my god, Malfoy is _good_ looking.

That thought actually disturbs me more than anything.

Once my knee is healed he looks up at me, his silver eyes searching and then he smirks as he stands up. I pull down my dress to cover my knickers as I stare up at him.

"All better?" he asks as he looks down at me with darkened eyes.

"All better," I confirm as my heart beat starts hammering so hard I can feel it in my ears. "Thanks," I whisper as he steps closer to me so he's resting in between my knees. This is all wrong. "I should go…" I trail off when I look at him.

He's staring at me again, in that intense surveying look that he had in his eyes the first time I saw him at Folks Hills. I'm not sure I like it. He brings a hand up and I nearly flinch as he touches a strand of hair that's dangling from my pony tail, twisting it in his fingers like it fascinated him.

"I like your ribbon," he says as he looks at the blue ribbon tied in my hair.

"Thanks," I whisper again. He is much too close to me. I need to leave right now. He uses those long fingers of his to untie the bow and I frown. "Hey, what are you doing?" I ask with a furrowed brow as he takes my ribbon and he puts it in his pocket. "That's mine."

"It's mine now," he says with a small smirk. "See how this works."

"Right," I shake my head and push him back as I slide off the table. "I'm going home."

"Hey," he says as he catches my waist and he holds me in place as I snap my eyes to his. He's touching me. Why is he touching me? "Stay," he commands before bending his head down towards mine.

Oh, my god.

I turn my head to the side quickly to dodge whatever the hell he was just trying to do and I feel his hand tighten on my waist so I push it off of me.

"What's the problem?" he asks impatiently.

"I have to go home," I tell him and he grabs my chin and forces me to look at him.

"Liar," he says after a few silent moments as I shake him off of me. I hate that he keeps on touching me. It makes me uncomfortable. "I don't appreciate lies, Ginny," he says firmly as I push his hand away.

"You're dating Cho," I try another tactic and he scoffs.

"You don't even like her."

"So?" I answer back and he raises an eyebrow before looking at my lips with darkened eyes.

"So?" he repeats. "Tell me you want me and I won't be with her anymore," he says. Now it's my turn to scoff.

"I don't want you," I tell him bravely and his eyes flare up before settling on that cold look once again.

"The way you're looking at me right now proves otherwise."

"I'm not looking at you anyway," I tell him as I push him back to give myself more room and to make an escape. I push down my dress and slip my shoe back on. "I don't even like you." I know I sound cruel. If it was anyone but him I would have felt bad, but it's not so I don't. I tie my shoe and walk away from him, hoping he won't just up and touch me again. "I don't even know you."

Once out of the kitchen I speed walk to the front door and I don't even bother to look behind me as I fetch my bike and start wheeling it towards the gate. Once outside I feel safe enough to actually breathe and I put my leg over the bike so I can sit probably on the seat. Before I can wheel off, Draco grabs my arm and when I turn to yell at him he uses his other hand to grab my pony tail, jerking it back with a painful tug to tilt my neck. I don't even have time to think as his warm lips crash down onto mine.

I let my feet land on the ground to balance myself as Draco deepens the angry dominating kiss and I gasp into his mouth as he presses himself against my leg. I keep my eyes open as I just let him kiss me, stupidly not doing anything, but when he licks my lips, I find my eyes shutting and my stomach fluttering.

What am I doing? I need to stop this! What would my brother say if he saw me now?

I know what he'd say, I think bitterly as I kiss Draco back with a vengeance. He'd say that Malfoy was only kissing me to get back at Harry because there would be no way a boy would find me attractive on my own. I wrap my arm around his neck as his one of his hands finds it's way to my waist, his other still firmly gripping my hair to keep me in place. He tastes like fruit and he smells amazing and his tongue is doing all kinds of amazing things against mine. I'm suddenly very uncomfortable to be sitting with this bike between my legs because of the way my body is responding.

Ron would also tell me that I was stupid and naïve and that I didn't understand people. That I was too plain and simple to ever be wanted by someone who was as good looking as Draco. What would Harry think if he saw me kissing Malfoy? Probably nothing. I let myself get lost in the kiss and I even let my hands run through the hair at the base of his neck as I think on it.

Slowly, he pulls back and I almost moan in disappointment. I've never been kissed like that, with such a dominating and knowledgeable mouth and it was quite intoxicating. I'm breathing hard again and I stare at his throat as I try not to be embarrassed by what just happened. I let my arm drop from around his neck as he brings a hand up to my chin and he runs his thumb over my lips.

"Hm," is all he says like he was thinking and when I send a shy glance up to him he loosens his hold on my hair. I'm confused. He's looking at me now like he's never seen me until this moment and then a slow smirk travels across his lips before he bends down again.

I come to my senses before it can happen once more. "Stop," I whisper as I put my hands on his chest to push him back.

"Judging by what just happened, I doubt you really mean that," he says seriously, trying to dip down to kiss me again, but I turn my head before he can. He ran his thumb over my jaw to gently nudge me into looking at him again, and when I finally do, he places a chaste kiss on the corner of my mouth and then he tilts his head to kiss me from a different angle.

I tried to stop it at first, but he nipped my lower lip with his teeth and that sent a pleasurable fire all through my body so like a weak willed person, I melted into the kiss, letting him do as he pleased as I grabbed his arm for balance.

"See," he says as he pulls back, leaving me dumbfounded and breathless once more. "You already know what should happen."

"What?" I say because I'm still in a fog and I wasn't listening to what he was saying.

"Say that you want me," he says as he pulls back and he puts on his sunglasses. "That's all you have to say," is all he adds before walking back through the gate.

I watch them close and then I bring my fingers up to my burning lips. What was that?

"There you are, Ginny," Daphne says as her and Pansy ride back to me on their bikes. "We assumed you were with us."

"Yes," is all I say before coughing uncomfortably and then looking at the two girls.

The way they're both looking at me… I don't know but it's odd. Did they just see what happened? "Are you okay?" Pansy asks with a raised eyebrow, but her eyes are twinkling like she knows a great secret and I blush to think she saw that terrible thing with Malfoy. "You look a little flustered," she says and Daphne giggles.

"I'm fine," I say quickly as I put my head down and start wheeling my bike forward so I can ride it properly. "Let's go."

"Let's go to my place," Pansy says as we start riding again. "Have a snack or something. I'm getting hungry."

"I think…" I trail off as the wind whips through my hair. "I think I'm going to go home."

Neither of them protests and I go home with burning lips and my confused thoughts churning in my head.

"Ginny, are you okay?" Hermione asks as I sit on the front porch with my arms crossed under my chest and my bike forgotten in the yard.

"I think so," I whisper, only half sure. "Maybe..." I breathe out softly.


	3. Chapter 3

"Look at this dress," I say in excitement as I hand the catalogue over to Hermione, pointing out the red dress I circled with a blue ink pen. There's no way she could miss it, really. I even put stars all around it. "Isn't it lovely?"

"It is a cool dress," Hermione nods in agreement as I chew on the corner of my lip, leaning over her shoulder so I can look at it as well. "I like it."

"They have it on sale at Julie's," I say in excitement and she gives me a small smile. I know she doesn't really care, but I'm too excited about it to have her 'I don't care about clothes' thing damper my mood. "I have it on hold there and the woman said if my Mom picks it up by Friday then it will be forty percent off the sale price."

"That's a good deal," she says with a head nod and I make an agreeing sound. I've already tried it on and it fits perfectly…

"I told my Mom I want to wear it on my birthday," I smirk as I take the catalogue back so I can look at the dress again at a better angle. It's a more modern cut then what I'm used to with a shorter skirt and zippers along the pockets and the back of the dress for decorative detail. I think it will look great with the shoes Pansy had gifted to me. "I like it a lot."

"I think you'll look pretty in it," Hermione says and I smile to myself. "So…." She starts as we walk around my Mom's small garden.

The boys are playing wizarding chess inside so Hermione and I decided to go for a walk to avoid the cusses and glares they were throwing at each other. Since the whole kiss thing with Malfoy, I've been avoiding Pansy and that whole little group for the past week because I didn't want to be put into a situation like that again. I've taken to sticking around with Hermione to fill the void, no matter how frustrating I find it to be now that I've been away from it.

"Do you want to talk about anything?"

"Like what?" I ask with a shoulder shrug as I take a seat on one of the wooden benches my father had made when my parents were first married.

"Like what happened to you the other day," she says as she sits beside me. "You looked really out of it when you came back from that bike ride."

"Oh… that was…" Should I tell her about Malfoy? I glance at her from the corner of my eyes as she stares at me with a curious tilt of her head. What would she say? What would she think? I shake my head and look forward again, not wanting to be on the receiving end of her judgmental look. If I tell myself it wasn't a big deal, then that will make it not a big deal. "It was nothing," I answer.

"Are you sure?" she asks carefully and I fidget uncomfortably with my fingers as she pushes frizzy curls out of her eyes. She took the time to French braid her hair this morning, but some of her strands have decided to pop out to irritate her. "It didn't seem like nothing."

"It was nothing," I state again, wanting her to drop it, but of course she doesn't.

"Did those girls… Did Greengrass or Parkinson do something?" She says, making it sound like something dirty and unpleasant might have happened to me.

"No, they didn't," I snap, easily offended by the question because Ron has been hounding me ever since they came here. "Why does everyone think they're to blame?"

"Because they usually are," she mutters angrily and I glare at her.

"I like them."

"Why _do_ you like them?"

"What do you mean why do I like them?" I question and she narrows her eyes and turns more towards me.

"They're terrible people. You know what they say about Ron and Harry… they call me the 'M' word."

"It's not like you guys are nice to them," I state, trying to sound fair and trying to ignore the bitterness the 'M' word makes me feel when I think about it. "You guys make fun of them all the time."

"But Ginny," she says tiredly as she itches her arm after a bug lands on it. "They're… they're so mean."

"They're not mean to me," I say honestly. "I thought you'd be more tolerant. I know you guys don't get along but I like them a lot."

"If you say so," she says seriously. "But be careful. I know you don't want to hear that… but you have to question why they want to be friends with you…" I open my mouth to protest, but she puts her hand up. "Remember how weird it was that Malfoy took such an interest in you?" I blush and look away as I think of the kiss. "And then all of his friends suddenly want to be friends with you? Ginny, it's weird," she says seriously. "You have to really rethink this. If you like them… okay, that's it… but don't be naïve about it. Be smart and really question whether their intentions are legit. You know who's out there and you know Malfoy's family is heavily involved with you-know-who… I just don't want you to put yourself into a dangerous situation."

"They never ask me anything about Harry or what you guys are doing," I say softly as I cross my arms. I don't like talking about this. "Not that I would know anything anyways…" I mumble bitterly and she gives me a sad smile.

"Just be careful… okay?"

"Yeah," I say and then I cough. "Well, do you want to go inside now? I'm getting kind of hot."

She nods her head and we both stand up so we can go inside but before we reach the back porch, she touches my arm. I look at her over my shoulder as the sun shines in my eyes.

"Just think on it," she whispers as I squint against the light. "For me?"

"Sure," I nod my head and when we get into the back room Ron and Harry are still bent over the chess board, staring intently at the marble pieces as they decide their next moves.

I put the dress catalogue on the ground and walk over to the couch, slipping off my shoes as I take a seat next to my brother. My bag is under the table, so I grab it and pull out my notebook and a pen.

"Who's winning?" Hermione asks as she takes a seat on the floor by Harry's side so she can watch the pieces move. Chess is boring. I don't care what anyone has to say on the matter.

"Ron," Harry mutters with his fingers up to his lips as he concentrates on the board. His hair is especially messy today… I suspect he's been tugging on it while playing this game with my brother. I need to stop looking at him."Who else?"

"It's nice to be better than you at something, mate," Ron says with a smirk as he instructs his knight to take one of Harry's bishops.

I put my feet up on the couch and place my notebook against my knees so I can start writing. They play well into the hour, hissing insults and cussing at one another until Harry finally loses. I ignore it the best I can as I try to weave my story on the page. My brother gets up after a few moments of gloating and stretches his back with that look on his face...He has that annoying smug smile he gets every time he wins something… which isn't that often.

"I think that calls for a victory sandwich," he says, smirking. Harry leans back into the chair and crosses his arms like a pouting child. "Would the loser like anything?"

"No, I'd rather not clog my arteries. We just had Lunch," Harry says bitterly and I laugh a little as I turn my page so I can start another paragraph.

"Your loss," Ron shrugs. "Does anyone else want anything?" he asks and when he passes me, he tugs on my pony tail. "Something to drink or something, Gin?"

"No, I'm fine, thanks," I say as I chew on the end of the pen. What's another word for creepy? I should find a thesaurus or something.

"What are you writing about anyways?" Ron asks as he tugs the notebook away from me.

"Ron!" I yell as I jump to my feet to retrieve it from him. He knows better than to touch that.

"I thought you learned better than to write in diaries," he says as he dangles it over my head. What a prick he is. Bringing up what happened first year is something out of bounds and he knows that.

"It's not a diary, you sod," I tell him as I stomp on his foot. He yelps and I feel satisfaction from the noise. "Now give it back."

"I just want to know what you're writing all the time," he says as he turns around and flips it open. I try to make a grab for it but he maneuvers his body so I can't quite get it. I continue to try to wrestle it away from him as he starts to read it out loud.

"I looked across the room and found him leaning against the wall with his head turned down and his arms crossed over his chest…" he starts and I fight harder to get it away from him as he continues to read from my most treasured possession. I'm sure Harry and Hermione are getting a pretty good show right about now and embarrassment seeds itself into my brain. "I wondered what he was thinking. Was he thinking of Mr. Greyson like everyone else? Did he realize that everyone in the room had some level of suspicion towards him and his connection to the murder of his uncle… Murder?" Ron stops reading and looks at me. "What is this, Ginny?"

"Just stories," I tell him. I take advantage of his slip up and I finally get a hold of my notebook. "Stories you had no business looking at!"

"Why are you writing weird stories about murder?" he asks with a raised eyebrow. "You think you'd write about something more pleasant."

"Well, living with you just brings me down," I tell him as I flip through the book to make sure he didn't damage it. A few pages fall out and I narrow my eyes. "Ron, you broke the spine," I tell him as I quickly pick up the pages that have scattered across the ground. "God, you're so annoying!" I yell to anyone who will listen as I stuff the pages back into the notebook and glare at my older brother.

"I'll get you a new one, Ginny. Jesus," he says as he starts walking towards the kitchen again. I look to the side and see a vase sitting on one of the tables. I would give up the world to find enough courage to throw it at his head right now.

"I hate him," I say, not really meaning it, but feeling it as I slump back into my seat, cradling my book to me like it was a child.

"He can be an idiot sometimes," Hermione says to me and I roll my eyes as I put my broken notebook back into my bag so no more harm will befall it. My ears are burning, but I try to ignore the embarrassment my brother just caused me because it will do me no good.

"Understatement of the year," I mutter as I zip up my bag. Once it's safe, I slump against the sofa and cross my arms, thinking of ways to get back at Ron for being such an annoying fool of a brother.

"So, do you have plans tonight, Ginny?" Hermione asks and I glance at her as her eyes slide to Harry who is playing with the discarded chess pieces. I let my bitterness towards my brother cool and I raise my eyebrows at her question.

"No," I answer honestly as I uncross my arms. "Why?"

She shrugs and then gives Harry a meaningful look that's lost on me. I look at him too just because she keeps on doing it and his eyes snap to mine for a brief second before his cheeks start to darken. Is he blushing?

"No reason," she says as she stands up and dusts off the back of her pants. "I think I am going to get something to eat." She says, giving Harry another significant look. "I need to talk to Ron about something anyways. It might be a _while."_

Why did she put so much into that last word? No one says anything for a few moments so I give her a funny look. "Uh, okay?" I say and then she leaves. She shuts the door behind her, leaving Harry and I alone.

"That was weird," I say and Harry laughs a little… or, I think it's a laugh. It kind of got stuck in his throat and turned into a cough. "I think I'm going to head up to my room," I tell him as he hacks into his hand. "I'll see you later, Harry," I tell him as I stand up and put my bag over my shoulder, wanting to get as far away from him as possible. His rejection of me is still fresh in my mind and I don't want to be awkward about it.

"No, wait," he says once he clears his throat. He stands up as well and I stop walking. "I was thinking maybe we could…" he puts his hand on the back of his neck. He's nervous and that makes me furrow my brows. "I thought we could talk for a little bit?"

"Oh," I say as I look at the couch. "Uh, yeah… sure," I say as I put my bag down and I resume my spot by the arm rest.

He sits on the opposite end of the couch and we both stare straight ahead of us for a while until the silence and weirdness of it becomes too much for me to bear.

"Are you having a good summer?" I close my eyes and inwardly scold myself. _Stupid informal question, Ginny_. He's practically been living at our house every summer since he was twelve. You would think I could come up with a better conversation starter.

"Yeah, I like it here," he answers. I nod my head and tap my fingers against my knees. "It's the closest thing to a home I've ever had." I nod my head again and look at the fireplace. I don't really want to look at him directly because it's embarrassing for me. "What did you and Hermione do outside?" he asks after a long bout of silence.

"Just walked around and talked," I say with a shoulder shrug as I bring my hands up to my hair to tighten my pony tail. I need something to do with my hands after all and I send a look towards the closed door, hoping Hermione will come back soon. "Did you have fun playing chess?" I ask uncomfortably. He nods his head and takes his glasses off, cleaning them with the end of his shirt before sliding them back onto his nose. That's another one of his nervous gestures. "That's good."

I look at him. He looks at me. When our eyes meet I face forward again and try to ignore the flush in my cheeks.

"I wanted to talk to you, you know," he says as he stares at my profile, burning a hole into the side of my head. I swallow hard and bite the inside of my cheek like a moron. "The other day… by the garden..."

"It's okay, Harry," I say as I spare him a little glance. I don't want him to feel guilty for not wanting to kiss me. That just makes me feel pathetic. "Let's not worry about it," I assure him, giving him the fake smile I give to the people at Folk Hills.

"No, you don't understand," he says and I widen my eyes a bit as he scoots closer to me. I have to stop myself from moving back just because I'm not sure what's going on "I'm sorry… it's just that… "He trails off. "Things are complicated right now."

"I know that," I tell him. I'm not stupid to the whole thing. I know that he has a lot on his shoulders right now and I don't want to make his stay here uncomfortable. "I don't want anything from you, Harry," I assure him. I don't want him to feel bad because he can't like me the way I like him. "I'm not that little girl anymore."

"That has come to my attention," he says softly as he looks into my eyes. What does that mean? I look down at my knees to get away from it. "It's just…" he exhales loudly and looks around the living room. "I had this planned out… what I was going to say to you," he whispers and then he looks at me again, like he was in pain. "I'm not very good at talking."

"I think you talk fine," I tell him with a little smile and he laughs a little before looking down at my hands that I'm currently knotting together. Whatever he's doing right now is obviously hard for him, so I scoot closer and put my hands over his. "You can tell me anything, Harry," I reassure him. Maybe he'll finally let me into the loop about what he, Hermione, and Ron have been doing.

"Yeah," he turns his hand to hold mine and a flutter starts in my stomach before I stamp it down quickly. No reason to get my hopes up again. He stares at our hands for a while before he looks at me. I had nearly forgotten how truly green his eyes are. "Ginny, I…" he trails off again and his neck snaps forward. The sudden rigidness surprises me and I gasp.

He's staring straight ahead with his eyes glazed over and his mouth lightly open, like it was beginning to form into a rather nasty looking scowl.

What?

"Harry?" He doesn't move. "Harry?" I say a little more panicked as I slip my hand from his and I place it on his shoulder. "Are you okay?"

He furrows his brows and snarls with his teeth showing like a rabid dog ready to find. I widen my eyes and sit back as he hisses and spits while his back arches and his muscles become tense. What's going on with him? "What are you doing?" I ask carefully as he starts to snap his neck from side to side and I stand up in surprise as he falls to the floor and starts convulsing.

"Oh, Harry!" Hermione comes running into the room and kneels by his side. "Not again."

"Not again?" I say in disbelief as I cover my mouth because what's happening to him looks so painful and so scary. "This has happened before? Is he having a seizure?"

"No, he's not," she answers quickly as her eyes tear up. She rolls him on his side and holds his hands down because they're flailing around.

"It looks like a seizure," I say worriedly. "Should I call St. Mungos?"

"Harry!" Ron comes rushing into the room, pushing me to the side. "Oh, not again, mate," he says as he puts his hand on Harry's shoulder.

"What's going on?" I ask because this all seems to have happen before and they're handling it with practiced ease. Hermione gets a cloth to put in-between his teeth and Ron rubs his back, saying encouraging things to him. "Why is he hissing like that?"

"Ginny, go away," Ron says and I narrow my eyes as he stands up. "Just go upstairs or something."

"No, what's going on?"

"Just go, Ginny," he snaps in a panic as he pushes me until I stumble back. He just pushed me! "You're not a part of this."

"Fine, you jerk," I snap as I rub my arm and stomp out of the room.

When the door is closed, I close my eyes and rest my head against the wall. What's going on in there? I rub my arm where my brother had pushed me and hot anger starts to boil my veins. Why does he think it's okay to treat me like that? I can handle things too, you know! I want to go back in and demand to know what's going on, but the thought of Harry in that condition scares me a little, so I head outside to cool my temper. Walking around does me no good because I just want to go back inside… so I decide to go a little further off our property.

I get my bike from the shed and I hop on, taking off down our little dirty road past the woods and fields. My heart is racing and my cheeks are flushed as I ride aimlessly around and after a while I feel wetness on my cheeks. I stop my bike by a large oak tree and I wipe my eyes, realizing with embarrassment that I'm crying. Partly because of the way my brother had dismissed me… but mostly because of how sad I am for Harry. How often does he get like that… and why? I wish people told me things! Anger courses through me again and I look down the dirt road, realizing I'm heading towards the posh side of the village where Pansy lives.

I think I'll go there, see if she's home. She is my friend after all. I kick up my bike and start pedaling again, hoping the wind will dry my tears and the blotches from my face. I want to get rid of any trace of crying. When I reach the front porch of Pansy's large yellow house, I carefully place my bike on the ground before ringing the door bell.

A house elf with large green eyes answers with a trembling lip and I raise my eyebrows at it before coughing. I have never actually seen a house-elf answer a door before.

"Um, hi," I saw awkwardly as it stares at me. It looks ancient, with crinkles around its large eyes and a drooping nose that reaches its chin. "Is Pansy in?"

"Yes, the Miss is in," it says with a raspy voice.

Nothing happens for a few moments so I try again. "Well… may I see her then? Please." I add for good measure and the elf pops away without a word.

I furrow my brow and look around me… for what… I have no idea. After a few moments of nothing I walk towards one of the windows and look in. There's a large white grand piano in their living room and black leather couches surrounding it. It looks so chic…

"The Miss will see you now."

I jump and put my hand over my heart as the elf stands beside me, looking nervous. "Geez, you frightened me," I say with a laugh. It doesn't laugh… it doesn't even crack a smile.

"Follow me."

"Okay…" I say slowly as I follow the pleasant beast into the house.

Of course the inside reflects the beauty of the outside. Most of the walls I'm seeing are painted a metallic blue, with black and white framed photos of beautiful and exotic looking flowers. We even pass a large marble statue of… something… I have no idea what it's supposed to be, actually. It just looks like a lot of black swirly things, but I think it's amazing. I shake my head because I'm getting behind and I jog to catch up with the elf as it starts going up the winding stair case.

There are pictures all over the place of two little girls with dark hair in various stages of childhood. Baby pictures, toddler pictures, that awkward stage between kid and teenager. I know they're of Pansy and her younger sister Ivy and it's just another thing that humanizes them to me and makes the warnings Hermione gave me brush off my shoulder. I stop and actually smile at one of Pansy when she was around five years old or so, holding up a fish and smiling a gap toothed smile at whoever is taking the picture. She's just like everyone else.

"This way, miss," the elf urges. I snap out of it again and follow the creature into the bedroom on the right of the stair case where I find Pansy standing in front of a large three way mirror. Three elves are hovering around her, making changes to the beautiful white dress she's wearing with sewing needles and magical snaps of their bony little fingers.

"Ginny," she says with a smile as I enter. The odd little elf that showed me the way leaves without a word and I frown in its direction before smiling at Pansy. "What a surprise."

"How are you doing?" I ask uncomfortably as I step into her large room and take a look around with my arms crossed.

"I'm fine, of course," she says dismissively with a smile and then she faces forward as she touches the lace on her bodice with elbow length white gloves covering her fingers. "Not that I'm not thrilled to see you or anything," she says as she tilts her neck to get a better look at the dress in one of the mirrors. "But why are you here?"

I open my mouth to tell her about Harry, but I stop myself. It just didn't feel right to tell her that just yet so I shrug my shoulders.

"I just was in the neighborhood," I say dismissively, not wanting her to know how upset I actually am.

"Fair enough," she says with a sigh and then she glares down at one of the elves that's sewing a seam into the hem of her dress. "Are you almost finished with that?" she asks sharply. "You've been working on that for ages."

"Sorry Miss," the poor creature whispers before going back to work and Pansy glances at me over her shoulder before giving me a beautiful smile.

"Have a seat, Gin," she says, nodding to two over stuffed white chairs on either side of a large bay window.

I carefully take a seat and try not to touch anything because it all looks so perfect. I'm so worried about Harry that my hands are shaking, so I hold them together to try to tame them as I look around again. Pansy's room is beautiful, the kind of room fit for a pampered princes… it's all pink, and white, and pearls, and lace. I'm completely in love with it, of course, and her bed looks like something you could fall asleep in for a year.

"What do you think about my dress?" she asks before turning back to the mirror and smoothing out the crinkles with her fingers. "I'm going to be wearing it for the debutant ball."

"I think it's lovely," I say and it's the truth. It's sleeveless with a tight bodice and a loose fitting skirt that reaches her feet. There's a large cluster of tiny crystals that gather right around her chest and they rain down through the rest of the fabric, making it look like some kind of shimmering diamond dress.

"I don't understand why we all have to wear white," she says as she starts peeling off the elbow length gloves and throwing them behind her for one of the elves to pick up. "Heaven knows none of us are pure by any means." I laugh at that and she smiles as her eyes find mine in the mirror. "I can't wait to be debuted, though," she says with a sigh. "I know it's old fashioned, but it will be nice to go to some of my father's parties. Girl's aren't allowed at certain functions unless they've been introduced into society of course," she explains and I nod my head even though I really don't know what she's talking about.

"When is the ball?" I ask curiously as she smacks away the elf that was trying to stick a pin by her stomach.

"A week before Hogwarts starts up again," she answers as she turns around and looks at herself over her shoulder so she can look at her back. "I want this seam straightened," she says to one of the elves as I pick up a magazine from the table beside my chair. It's one all about shoes and I think I'll find it a suitable distraction. "By the way," she starts and I glance at her as I place it on my knee so I can look through it. "We're going to go to a pub on Friday to watch the game if you want to come. I was going to write you an invite, but you're here so I might as well pass it along."

"What game?" I ask and she raises an eyebrow.

"The first Quidditch game of the season… " she says slowly, like I was an idiot for not knowing. "The Falcons versus the Cannons? Geez, Ginny, I thought you were into all that Quidditch stuff."

"Oh," I say, feeling stupid. I had forgotten all about it. "I don't think so…"

"If it's because you're hanging out with that Luna friend of yours, she can come too," she says and I make a face as I remember what happened last time we all hung out together.

"I don't know if that's a good idea," I whisper and she frowns.

"Listen, I know last time I wasn't exactly the most welcoming person to your friend. She said that thing about my nose and I thought she was being mean like your brother… so… anyways, I promise if you bring her, I'll be better. A friend of yours is a friend of mine," she says with one of her hands on her heart like it was a pledge. "It'll be fun."

"I don't know…." I say as I think about Harry.

"What else are you guys going to be doing?" she asks and I bite the corner of my lip as I think on my conversation with Hermione. "You may as well come and watch the game with us."

It's worth debating I guess, even though I know the answer is probably no... but then I think of Malfoy and my heart starts hammering. "Will…" I swallow the lump in my throat and I start fiddling with corner of the magazine, trying not to let on how much this next question is going to bother me. "Will… Draco be there?"

There's a moment's pause and when I look up, she's looking right at me with a sly smile on her face. "Would you like him to be?"

"No," I say quickly, too quickly, because that sly smile breaks out into a full grin.

"Really?" is all she says before turning back to the mirror and shooing the elves out of the room as she starts to take off the dress. I look away. "You know," she says as she tugs the dress over her head, leaving her in the white strapless bra and lace hemmed slip. "Draco is a very good boyfriend to have." I make a disbelieving sound and she narrows her eyes as she hangs her dress. "He is," she confirms and I shake my head.

"I doubt Cho would think so," I whisper as I cross my arms. He did cheat on her when he kissed me, after all. I don't think that's something a good boyfriend does.

"They aren't officially together," she states hotly as she goes to her closet and pulls out a dress to tug over her head. "I mean, they fool around and all that, but they aren't official. Chang collects famous boyfriends like it's her job and I don't think Draco takes her very seriously."

I don't say anything… I just stare at the magazine as she finishes getting dressed.

"But if he is in a relationship, he's fully committed." She sits at her vanity and starts taking the pins out of her hair while I stare at her back. "He's a real gentleman and he'll take care of you, if you know what I mean," she says and I furrow my brows as she starts brushing her hair. "And he's an excellent kisser," she adds and my eyes snap to the page again as she smiles into her mirror, not wanting to give anything away. "Of course," she starts as she glances at me over her shoulder and I look up to meet her gaze timidly. "You would know all about that. Wouldn't you, Ginny?"

"What?" I say like an idiot and she rolls her eyes as she sets her brush down.

"Don't be coy, now. I know."

"You saw?" I gulp. I had my suspicions whether Daphne and Pansy had seen the terrible thing that had happened between Malfoy and I… but actually knowing that they know makes me feel dirty.

She shrugs her small shoulders and turns back to the mirror. "He told me."

"He told you he kissed me?" I question with a tight throat and her smile becomes wolfish.

"He told me you kissed back."

I don't say anything for a while and she starts laughing.

"God, Ginny! You look like someone just smacked you. Is it so terrible to kiss a good looking boy?" I don't say anything as I try to look at everything besides her. "And Draco is good looking. Don't you think so?"

I feel my cheeks heating up and I shrug my shoulders. "I don't know."

"Come off it, Ginny," she says in annoyance and I spare her a surprised look as she stands up and walks towards me. "Draco may be a lot of things, but ugly isn't one of them. It's okay to think he's attractive, you know," she says as she grabs the magazine from my lap. "You do think he's handsome… right?"

"I guess so," I whisper, not willing to give any more away and she sighs as she slumps in the white arm chair across from my own. She starts flipping through the magazine as she crosses her legs.

"Did you like it?" she asks after a few quiet moments and I lift my eyebrows as she stares at me. "When he kissed you, I mean?"

"I don't want to talk about it," I say quickly as I stand up and cross my arms. "It was weird and out of nowhere and he just pulled my hair the whole time."

"Rough can be sexy," she says with that twinkle back in her eyes and I turn away from her and look out the window.

"He's not my type," I huff like a child because I don't want her to know how much I did enjoy that kiss while it was happening. That would just be mortifying.

She snorts as I walk towards her window. "What is your type, I wonder?"

I think of Harry… "I like athletic guys," I answer and she laughs.

"Draco plays sports and he's quite good at it."

"Well…" I falter for a second and then I think about my notebook. "I like well read boys."

"Draco is going to be head boy this year," she points out and I narrow my eyes at the lake view I'm staring at.

"I only like dark haired blokes," I snap and she laughs at me again like I was doing something adorable.

"Why limit yourself?" she jokes and I glare at her as she smiles. I think of Hermione and the terrible thing that happened with Harry this afternoon. It makes everything seem so different. "I think you'll find that…"

"Why are you friends with me?" I ask suspiciously and she snaps her mouth shut and raises her eyebrows.

"What?" she asks dryly and I swallow the lump in my throat before turning to face her fully.

"I mean…" I resume my seat and avoid looking her in the eyes. "I mean why are you friends with me? It doesn't make sense," I say as I think about what Hermione had said to me. "And why are you pushing Draco Malfoy on me so much?" I state with a little more bravado and I even dare to look into her eyes. "Is this some kind of trick or something? Are you doing this so you can make fun of me? Or are you trying to get to Harry?"

"Of course not," she hisses and I retract at the venom in her voice. "Why would you think that?"

"My brother…"

"You're brother," she cuts me off spitefully before I can finish. "It's sad that your brother is making you question your friendships. What? Just because we don't get along with him we're not allowed to like you? What kind of bullshit is that?"

"No… it's not…. I mean…" I start falling all over my words as I try to organize my thoughts around them. "I mean…. I don't know why you want to hang out with me all of a sudden."

"I like you, Ginny," she states angrily as she stands up. "I think you're funny and sweet and I think it's really shitty of your brother to make you feel bad about being my friend. This isn't a trick or anything like that and I'm not trying to push Draco on you… I just think he's a good guy who should be given the benefit of the doubt. People rarely ever do that for him and he's already done it for you."

For some reason I feel bad, like a child that just got scolded into place and I can't look at her.

"I like you, Ginny," she says as she kneels in front of me and takes my hand. Her voice sweeter than before."You believe that right? Just like you like me?"

"Yeah, sure," I say with a head nod and she smiles.

"And…." She pauses a second before licking her lips and squeezing my hand. "And maybe you shouldn't be so quick to judge Draco. You might even find that you like him if you give it chance. Just keep your options open, alright?"

"Does…." I stop, but push myself into speaking again. "Does he like me?" All clues point to yes, but it just seems so improbable.

"I don't really think it's my place to say," she says with a sly smirk. Right.

I nod my head and she smiles before standing up and going towards her closet. "I have the perfect thing for you to wear." She disappears and when she comes back out she's holding a blue mini skirt and a thin white t-shirt. "We're all Falcon's fans," she explains the colors as she walks towards me and sets them on my lap. "You should wear this."

"I have to see if Luna wants to go," I say because she does get to decide as well and Pansy sighs.

"I'm sure she'll say yes. Anyways, I have to meet Millicent for lunch," she says as she checks her watch. "Do you want to tag along?"

"No," I say quickly because I hate that Millicent girl. I stand up and put the clothes under my arm. "I have some stuff to do anyways," I say to soften my refusal. "I might see you later."

"Here," she says as she tears off a piece of paper and writes something down. "This is the address for the Pub. I really hope you come and remember what I said about your friend Luna. I promise to be more welcoming."

"We'll see, thanks for letting me hang out with you," I say and she smirks.

"Any time. See you around."

"Bye."

I get back on my bike, putting the clothes in the embarrassing white basket and heading home with my thoughts over lapping and crisscrossing together. Everything is so confusing now. When I finally get to my house, I put my bike back in the shed before heading in side. My mother is back from the store and she's standing over the stove, making dinner.

"Is Harry alright?" I ask as I walk past the table, eyeing her back. She should be more panicked then she is after that thing with Harry.

"Of course he is," she says, giving me an odd look over her shoulder. "Why wouldn't he be?"

"No reason," I say, figuring they were keeping it a secret from her as well and then I speed walk towards the back room to see if he's still in there.

He's not. None of them are. I take the stairs two at a time and when I reach Ron's bedroom I put my ear against the door. Nothing. With a defeated and worried sigh I go back to my own room to think it over. That's when I hear the voices.

"Do you need any more water?" That's Hermione's voice. Are they in my room? I shake my head and walk closer, careful to not make any noise. "Harry, we have to do something about this. You can't keep on having these episodes. You have no idea what they'll lead to."

"I know," Harry answers and his voice sounds odd and scratchy. "That's why we're leaving soon."

I hear Hermione sigh loudly and her cot makes that annoying squeaking sound it always makes when someone sits on it.

"Did you get a chance to talk to her at least?" He doesn't answer, or if he did, I can't hear it.

"Where did she go?" he asks and I have a feeling they may be talking about me. "Did I scare her?"

"I think the situation scared her and our reactions to it. She left because Ron was being his usual charming self and he pushed her out of the room."

They're silent for a long time until Harry speaks again. "Maybe it was a sign," he says and I hear Hermione sniff.

"What was a sign?"

"That thing happening earlier… I'm not normal, Hermione. I never will be and I was stupid to think I could be."

"Harry, that's not true."

"Yes it is," his voice cracks. I think he might be crying now. My heart aches a little at the realization and I lean against the wall as I turn my face towards the door so I can listen some more. I can hear him trying to catch his breath and the image I make in my head of what he looks like right now makes me want to cry myself. "It's not even worth it to try."

"Everyone deserves to have something normal in their life, Harry," Hermione whispers in her motherly voice that she always uses when she comforts someone. "This won't be forever… we'll find out what's happening to you and we'll fix it. We always do. We can win this."

"I'm glad you're so confident," he says in a hoarse voice.

"I just have faith in you," she says softly.

"Where did Ron go?" he asks, trying to make his voice steadier.

"He went for a walk," Hermione answers. "You know how upset he gets when he sees you like that."

"I'll make you a deal, Hermione," he says and the cot creaks again. "If you can get the courage to finally tell Ron how you feel, then I'll try again."

"He doesn't even like me," she whispers and I realize now how close Hermione and Harry truly are.

"Of course he does," Harry says with a little chuckle. "He just doesn't know it yet."

"Well, we'll see how it goes," she sighs and he laughs a little again. "She's going to ask me what happened to you, you realize that right?" she says after a small stretch of silence. "What do you want me to tell her?"

"I don't care," he says and I bite my lip. "I'm embarrassed enough as it is… I don't want her to ask me anything about it if you can help it."

I hear footsteps coming to the door so I turn on my heels and start walking towards the stairs. That night, when I ask Hermione what had happened to Harry in the darkness of my bedroom she tells me that he had eaten some bad fish that made him sick. I knew it was a lie…. But she said it so convincingly.

X

* * *

I stare at Luna in her blue shirt and braids as she rolls on her toes. I can't believe she wanted to actually go to this. To be honest, when Pasny invited us to that pub, I kind of knew Luna and I wouldn't go, but Luna came over a couple of hours ago, overly excited and asking what time we wanted to leave. I'm still a little perplexed by it.

"Are you sure you want to go, Luna? I mean, we don't have to."

"No, it's okay. I'm all for second chances." She says as she smiles and pulls something from her pocket. "Pansy wrote me an apology letter that I thought was quite lovely."

I take the paper and unfold it, skimming the smooth handwriting. "She sent this to you?" I say as I read it over and Luna nods her head.

"Yeah, I got it this morning," she says as I fold it back up with an odd look on my face. "I thought it was nice… people rarely ever send me apology letters, you know."

"I thought you were upset because of the whole alcohol thing," I say because Luna was convinced that Pansy tried to trick me when really it was my stupidity.

Luna makes a face and then shakes her head. "I may have been wrong about that."

"If you're sure…" I trail off before handing her the letter. It was kind of Pansy to do, perhaps she meant it all...maybe...

"I'm sure," she says with a head nod. "If it's weird we'll leave." I nod my head and she looks into my eyes as I start changing into the outfit Pansy had given me. The blue skirt and thin white t-shirt fit me like a glove and I give myself a once over in the mirror before facing her again. "If I want to leave, you have to promise me you'll listen."

I feel bad about that, and I nod my head as I tie my hair into a bun, letting my bangs hang down. "Yes, I promise. If you want to leave…. We'll leave."

"Good," she says with a lopsided smile. I pull out some of the blue jewelry I wear for work to pull the outfit together and then we go to the Apparation point outside of my house.

We apparate to the front of a two story sports bar somewhere in wizarding London and Luna steps right up to the door and opens it with confidence. I stay a few steps behind her. I hate walking in first to a place I'm not familiar with and I'm glad Luna's not as weird as I am about things. She's just weird about everything else.

"Can I see your ID's?" a large black man who's sitting on a stool just inside the pub stares at us and puts his foot out to keep us from going any further.

"Oh, yes…" Luna grabs her wallet and starts sorting through it. I open my purse to take out my own. We both hand them over at the same time and he takes one look at the date of birth before shaking his head.

"It's seventeen or older tonight, ladies," he says in a gruff monotone voice and I frown as he hands me my ID. "Sorry."

"Couldn't you just mark our hands or something?" I offer and he raises an eyebrow. "We won't drink or anything."

"Nothing I can do," he says with a head shake and more people come in behind me. I move aside so they can get in. All of them seem to be of age because he nods them along after checking their ID's. Well, shoot.

"I guess we should just go," I whisper to Luna and she nods her head as she follows me out. "It was worth a try," I say with a shrug as we hit the humid air on the sidewalk. I put my hands in the small pockets of Pansy's skirt and I stare at Luna as she looks around. "What do you want to do now?"

"We could always go back to your place," she says with a shrug.

"Let's walk around for a little bit." To be honest, I don't want to go home just yet because everyone there seems to be avoiding me since the whole 'Harry' thing. She nods her head and we start walking down the walk way side by side. I put my head down to watch my feet as we weave in and out of the crowd of people, thinking to myself about how it smells like rain.

"Are you leaving already?" I glance up in surprise. Of course there's Draco right there, with a hand in his jean pocket and a falcon's jersey on.

"What are you doing here?" I blurt out without thinking first and the corner of his lip turns up.

"I was talking to some friends," he says, nodding behind him to two suspicious looking people in black cloaks.

"_Those_ are your friends?" I say disbelievingly. They look like drug pushers on the worst corner of knockturn alley to be honest.

"I have many friends," he says with a wink. I suddenly realize who I'm talking and what happened the last time I was around him and I look down.

"Oh," I hate that I blush so much around him. What is he doing out here anyways? The game is about to start.

"It's good to have friends," Luna says in her dreamy voice. I send a hesitant look towards Draco as he eyes her coolly."We're not of age yet," Luna explains, oblivious to his uncaring look."They won't let us in."

"We can't have that," he says and when I look up at him, he smiles. It's a charming smile and I don't know what to do with it. "I'm sure I can handle it." He says as he walks towards me and puts his hand around my waist, turning me with force until we're headed back to the pub.

"What are you doing?" I whisper fiercely. I don't want him to think he has claim to me whenever he wants just because I let him kiss me that one time. People are watching.

"I'm getting you into a pub you're too young to get into, so shut up," he says like the gentleman that he is as he squeezes his hand around my waist. I look over at Luna and she shrugs her shoulders before following us.

He's just _so_ sweet, isn't he?

He looks over his shoulder once and smirks at Luna. She smiles at him, but I'm pulled away from that weirdness when Draco opens the door for me. He makes a motion for me to step in first and when I cross over the threshold his hand is back to my waist while Luna steps beside us. I give her a look and then glance down at the hand on my waist. She doesn't even seem to notice. The black guy seems to know Draco, because he smiles as we approach, and then his eyes slide to mine.

"They're underage, Malfoy. I can't let her in… I'm sorry. You know the Aurors busted all the pubs on this street last month for underage."

"I know, Carl," Malfoy replies. "And I understand," he says as he takes something from my pocket and hands it to the bouncer. "But she's my girl. I'm sure you can make an exception." My ears are on fire and for I'm completely embarrassed that he just said that. His girl? I look at Luna again so see if she's hearing the same thing I am… she's staring at her fingernails. Honestly.

"Wait… I'm not…" I don't want into this pub that damn badly. No one needs to think I'm in any way affiliated with Draco Malfoy. Benefit of the doubt be damned.

"Shut up," he snaps again and I narrow my eyes at him. He's always telling me to shut up!

"You shut up," I snap back and he looks down at me with a raised eyebrow as the bouncer eyes us curiously. Draco gives me another surveying look before shaking his head and looking back at that Carl guy like I didn't even speak.

"She's not going to drink anyways. They just want to watch the game."

The guy looks at Draco and then at Luna beside us before glancing down at the thing Draco had handed him. "Alright," he says as he tucks whatever it is into his jacket and Draco gives him a smug smile. "But don't let anyone know they're under age."

"I thought you'd see things my way," Draco says with a wink before pulling me into the crowed pub.

"Look, Luna and Ginny are here," I hear Daphne's voice as we walk into the crowed pub full of Falcons fans. She comes running over to us, her blonde hair in a high pony tail that bounces with each step and I can't help but smile at her. She just has one of those pleasant faces that you enjoy smiling at. She gives me a hug when she's close enough and then she turns to Luna with a large smile. "I'm glad you two could make it," she looks at Draco and the hand that's still around my waist. Oh, right. I push his hand off and he just gives me a look before shrugging it off. "And Draco…" she adds with a sly smile. "Come on, we saved you seats."

She starts tugging on my hand until we get to a large table that's surrounded by their usual gang of people all holding onto beer bottles and mixed drinks, talking loudly to one another over the roar of the pub.

"Hey, Gin," Pansy smirks as I sit beside her, winking at me as she takes in the blue and white outfit she had given me to wear. "Glad you came."

"Has the game started yet?" I ask as Luna takes a seat on the opposite side of me, by Theo Nott who spares her a little glance before turning and whispering something in Zabini's ear.

"Not yet," she says as she takes a drink from her beer bottle.

I go to lean towards Luna to ask her what she thought about what just happened, but Draco slides in-between us before I can. I sit straight and raise my eyebrows as he stands there, leaning against the table like he owned it.

"What do you want to drink?" He asks as he takes a few coins from his pocket, counting them as I stare at his profile in disbelief.

"You promised the bouncer I wasn't drinking," I remind him and he gives me an irritated look.

"You could always have water if you'd like, but when surrounded by drunk people watching Quidditch I find that it's always best to have some kind of alcohol in your system."

"Weren't you the one who ordered me never to drink," I say as I remember the conversation in Pansy's boat house last weekend. I bristle in annoyance as I remember the demand.

"I told you not to drink by yourself," he corrects as he puts his hand on the table to give me his full attention, totally blocking Luna from my view. "But I'm here right now so I can monitor what you're doing. There won't be puking on anyone's shoes tonight if I can help it. You don't have to drink like a fucking child to have fun."

I feel my lip curling back in a scowl. "You're not my father," I hiss and he raises his brows.

"Thank God for that."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I say in offence and he narrows his eyes.

"That means that I'm grateful I'm not the main patriarch to that large Weasley clan of yours."

I feel like hitting him. "You're a bastard," I say with fire in my veins and he gives me a malicious smile.

"How am I the bastard here?" he asks and I know everyone is staring at us right now. I can practically feel it, but I can't make myself look. … and I also can't figure out what to say to him. Realizing everyone was watching threw me off and I can't come up with a witty response right now. "No response?" Yeah, he noticed too. "Didn't think so."

"Shut up, Malfoy," I bite back, trying not to pout because I just lost this fight. I wonder if he likes being told to shut up as much as I do. He gives me an unpleasant smile before turning on his heels and walking towards the bar. I exhale slowly, not realizing I was holding my breath.

"Jesus, Ginny," I hear Pansy whisper from my side. She sounds like she's disappointed with my behavior. "He just wanted to buy you a drink. Benefit of the doubt, remember?"

I look at her before glancing at Luna. She seems to be having a pleasant conversation with that Theodore Nott kid and she even laughs at something he says. Benefit of the doubt, indeed. I lean towards her to try to hear their conversation, but Pansy pulls me back to her.

"He's trying so hard to be nice to you," Pansy continues to scold me like I was a child and eventually it does seep in and guilt starts to weed its way into my brain. "You don't have to like him, but at least be civil. You're being so gauche." She sniffs and turns her head from me.

I don't even know what the freaking word means, but it doesn't sound nice.

I don't say anything to that and I just stare at the table, conflicted with my thoughts and what I should do. Luna laughs loudly and I frown and give her a sideways look. I don't like Theodore Nott, to be honest. The last time I was around him all he did was stare at my breasts the whole time. Past Theo's shaggy head, I can see the bar. I spot Draco's head of blond hair as he stops to chat with some bloke in a falcons hat. I look down at the table again, feeling bad. He just wanted to buy me a drink… why did I have to start a fight like that? What is it about him that makes me so uncomfortable? I glance up and see Daphne giving me a sympathetic look and she leans over the table once she realizes I'm out of my table staring stupor.

"Maybe you should go apologize to him. You won't feel so bad then," she says softly and I furrow my brows.

"Who said I feel bad?" I answer. I know I sound like a bitch and that makes me feel bad too.

"It's written all over your face, Gin. You don't have a filter… that's what makes you so likable." She puts her hand on mine and smiles. "Go talk to him," she says and I bite the corner of my lip. "Just let him be good to you…. Draco can be very charming if you let him."

She nods her head and goes back to her seat. I turn towards Luna and I tap her shoulder. "Hey, do you think it's odd that…"

"Ginny, have you met Theo before?" she asks, totally cutting me off as she looks towards him. He's tall and thin with shaggy brown hair and a rather puppy dog eyed looking face.

"Yes," I say sharply because he's giving me a smug smirk… like he knew I was thinking about how uncomfortable he made me at Folk Hills.

"Did you know that he likes snorkel hunting?" she asks and I give him a suspicious look.

"I do," he says as he lifts his glass towards me. "I can't help it."

"Do you even know what a snorkel is?' I ask snidely and he raises his thick brows.

"Do you?" he counters.

I open and close my mouth a few times before realizing I actually don't know what a snorkel is, but Luna is right there with the answer.

"A snorkel is a puddle dwelling creature that only comes out during afternoon tea…." She starts droning on about it and I look past Theo's head again to see Draco. He's done talking to the guy and he's headed towards the bar now with his head down.

Guilt.

It feels thick in my throat.

"I'll be right back," I whisper to Luna once she's finished talking and she waves me off before turning to Theo the creep. I stand up and start taking the route towards the bar.

I hate feeling guilty and I hate it when people make me feel bad, but I guess they're right. Even though Draco can be quite rude and demanding, he hasn't really warranted the ill treatment I just gave him by starting that fight. I don't think I can properly apologize to him just yet, but maybe I can break the ice and make it not so unbearable.

I can see his strong back as I approach. His hair is more disheveled today, and his look is the most casual I think I've ever seen him wear. He is good looking, again I notice that in annoyance and he kissed me. I don't know why, but there's a little part of me that's proud about that… proud and profoundly confused.

"Draco," I say as I slide in beside him. It's terribly crowded at the bar and I'm pressed up right against him and some large man in a derby hat. "Hey," is all I can think of saying as he glances down at me.

"Have you followed me over here to instigate another fight?" he asks hatefully. I have nothing to say to that because being this close to him just reminds me of that kiss and how on fire my body was… "Alright," he says softly after a few moments. He turns his body more towards mine so his hips are pressed against my own. "What do you want?"

"What?" I whisper as I look up at him.

"To drink," he says as he flags down a bartender. "What would you like?"

"Oh," I shake my head because I thought he was asking something else and I open my purse to dig out a few coins. "I would just like a coke actually."

"Really?" he says sarcastically and after I have my money I look up at him. He rolls his eyes again before turning to the bartender. "Can I get two seven and seven's."

"What are seven and sevens?" I ask as I try to get the bartenders attention so I can order my drink because Draco didn't. He walks on past like I was invisible.

"It's kind of like a Whiskey sour," he says. I would ask him what a Whiskey Sour was… but he said it like it was something everyone should know and I didn't want to seem stupid, so I just nodded. "If you don't like it, I'll drink it. I'm not much a beer drinker," he admits. "And it's always good to start with liquor first."

"Here you are, Mr. Malfoy," the bartender says, sliding two high ball glasses towards us. "Do you want me to keep a tab open for you?"

"Yes," Draco nods his head as he hands one of the glasses to me. "And make sure someone comes to our table every once and a while to take orders. I don't want to have to come to the bar every time I want a drink." I sniff the drink and crinkle my nose. "Just try it." I hear him say and I figure he must see my hesitation.

I take a small sip as he watches and I make a face. "It kind of taste like 7-up," I answer. Kind of… if 7-up burned on the way down. "It's not too bad."

"Good." Is all he says as he takes a drink from his own glass.

"Um…" I say as I play with the coins in my hands. "How much was this?" I ask as show him my money. "I didn't bring much with me, but you can have what I brought…" he puts his hand on mine and closes my fist. I look into his eyes…. They look metallic.

"Girls don't pay," he says simply and I nod my head in acceptance before putting my money away. I'm not going to argue with that.

"Thanks," I whisper as I take another small sip from my drink.

"Can I ask you a question?" he asks and I glance up at him and nod my head. "Why do you hate me so much?"

"I don't hate you," I kind of lie. I have no idea how I feel about him to be honest. I used to hate him… but now I just don't know.

"Is that true?" he asks.

I sigh and put the drink on the bar. "It's just… You're so mean," I tell him and he stares at me with an emotionless face. "I've seen the things you do and say to people… to my brother and Hermione… and I know they're mean to you too," I add as I think about my argument with Hermione. "But you can be plain cruel."

"I'm not cruel to you," he points out and I look at his throat.

"Not now…. But the things you say…. You told my brother that his family was just white trash. That's me. I'm his family. How am I supposed to like you when you say things like that?"

He brings his hand up and I furrow my brows as he runs his fingers over my cheek, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. "It was falling in your eyes," he explains as he brings his hand back to take another drink from his seven and seven. "Are you even a falcons fan?" he asks suspiciously as he glances at the blue and white clothes I'm wearing. He's officially changing the subject, but I don't call him out on it.

"I'm a cannons fan, actually," I admit, and he smiles.

"Well, don't say that too loudly," he tells me and he leans in closer to me. "You're in falcon territory."

"Yes," I say as I glance around the pub. It's a sea of blue and white. "I see that."

"Are you going to be trying out for Quidditch this year?" he asks and I smile to myself. This is all safe waters. I'm almost proud of myself for being normal about it.

"Of course," I say and he smirks darkly at me.

"So you're going to be my competition then. You're looking at the new Slytherin team captain."

"You know that already?" I say seriously. "Don't you guys have try outs and stuff like that to decide that title?" Of course, Harry is a shoo in this year for the role, but there usually is some façade of a chance for other people.

"No, it came with my head boy letter," he says and I have the feeling he may be trying to show off.

"I can't believe you've gotten all of that stuff already. We haven't gotten our letters from Hogwarts yet."

"That's because Slytherin's are more efficient," he says smugly and I shake my head with a smile on my face.

"That or you're just assuming you're getting those titles. I wouldn't pass it by you to be that pompous."

"Oh, look at you making assumptions," he teases and then I feel his warm hand on my waist again. "Would you like to hear some assumptions I have about you."

"Not really," I tell him, half joking as I take another drink. It's strong and it burns my throat, but I ignore it.

"That's a lie," he says as he finishes his drink. The bartender is right there to replace it like he didn't have a line of people waving him down. He licks his teeth and looks me over. "I assume that you're uncomfortable that I'm touching you right now," he says as his hand slips underneath the material of my shirt so it's resting on my hip. I inhale deeply. "But, you haven't done anything to move me yet because deep down you know you like it."

"That's not true," I tell him as I remove his hand from under my shirt.

"Just an assumption," he says with a smile as my stomach flutters. Why is it doing that? Stop doing that! "I'm also assuming that you don't want to like me… but you did like the way I kissed you because it made your knickers wet."

"Draco!" I hiss. I can't believe he just said that and he laughs as I glare at him.

"It was just an assumption," he defends himself as he takes a drink from his newly filled glass. "But," he says as he leans down so his lips are right against my ear. "Closer to the truth than you would have liked, right?"

"That's just disgusting," I say and he laughs again as he pulls back.

"I'm just joking," he says and I nod my head as I pick up my drink.

"We should go back to the table," I tell him. I forgot I left Luna stranded there by herself. Again I'm reminded that I'm just a terrible friend.

"You're probably right," he says seriously as he takes the drink from my hand. "I'll carry these. You lead the way."

When we get there, people quickly move to free up two seats for Draco and I and I blush as I sit down because he takes his seat so close to mine, handing me my drink and putting his other arm across the back of my chair. He's acting overly familiar with me and I don't know if I like it. I look at his handsome profile again and the pride thing is back and I try to stamp it down.

I look around for Luna for some help and I see her standing at the far end of the table with that Theo Nott kid again, laughing and making hand movements likes she was telling him a story. I stare at her for a while, trying to judge her hand gestures and I widen my eyes when I realize she's telling him about how her and her father spend three house meditating each day… I glance at Theo… he looks interested and not in the least bit put off by it. This whole thing is just weird.

"Your friend and Nott seem to be getting on quite well," Draco points out and I nod my head with a furrowed brow as I take another drink. It goes right to my cheeks and I start to feel that buzzing feeling that the alcohol gave me the last time I drank.

"Yeah, it's a bit odd." I add as I watch them, waiting for him to say something mean or to make an annoyed face at her like I'm used to seeing.

"Why is it odd?" Draco asks by my side. I see Pansy out of the corner of my eye with her hand on Blaise's lap and Daphne is chatting up some older looking men who are buying her drinks. "Your friend is cute." That gets my attention and when I look at him he raises his eyebrows. "What? Do you not think your friend is good looking?"

"No, I know she is," I say… I actually don't know why I'm bothered, to be honest.

He smirks.

"Are you jealous?" he asks and I scoff at him before downing the rest of my glass. "You have nothing to worry about, you are much prettier than everyone here," he says and I know that's a lie so I give him a look. "You don't believe that?"

I look at Daphne with her blonde hair and slim body. "No," I say honestly and I feel his hand on the back of my neck, running his fingers up and down. My spine tingles.

"That's a shame. I enjoy the way you look," he says, getting closer to me again and when I look at him I know I want to say something… I just can't. "Pretty little Ginny," he says with his silver eyes twinkling and I stare at his lips as he leans towards me… and then he jumps back quickly, signaling a odd surge of disappointment through me.

"Sorry I'm late!" Cho Chang comes running up to the table and bitterness pools in my stomach as Draco sits back and removes his arm from the back of my chair. "It was a real bear to get here," she says as she puts her purse down on the chair next o mine. "Oh, hello Ginny," she smiles when she sees me and I give her an artificial smile back. "Do you mind trading me seats?"

"Oh," I look back at Draco. He gives me a challenging look and I sigh. I remember what he said to me… If I told him I wanted him he wouldn't be with Cho anymore. That arrogant jerk. "Yeah, sure," I say uncomfortably as I move to her seat as she sits in mine and turns to Draco with her eyes shining.

"Why did you move?" Daphne whispers to me once I take my new seat. "I thought you were going to kiss him just now."I give her a stern look. "You looked like you were going to jump his bones."

"No, I wasn't," I hiss as I finish off my drink. The pub starts cheering and I look at the wall as the Quidditch game starts playing. I'm thankful for the distraction and I sit with my arms crossed a majority of the time until Daphne taps my shoulder.

"Do you want another drink or anything?" she asks as a waitress makes the rounds at the table. I shake my head and send a sly look to Draco and Cho.

Oh, my god. She's kissing him.

"I'm going to get some fresh air," I say as I grab my purse and start heading for the back exit.

"Do you want me to come with you!" I hear Daphne call after me, but I shake my head and keep going until I reach that back door.

Fresh air is not what I find. It seems all of the smokers who are too polite to smoke inside are hanging out in this back alley and I make a face when I see it, but I'm too mad to go back inside so I cross my arms and lean against the brick wall with a sour look on my face. Maybe I can get Luna and we can leave… but she looks like she's having a good time and I've never seen her so caught up in a boy before…

"Hey there, Red," I look up and glare because of the annoying nickname. There's Blaise Zabini with a cigarette hanging from his perfect lips. He offers me one and I shake my head as he lights the end with his wand. "You hiding out here?" he asks after a few moments.

"I'm not hiding," I say as he blows smoke from the corner of his mouth. Being around Blaise Zabini just makes me uncomfortable because no boy should be that beautiful. It makes me self conscious. He even has longer eyelashes than I do.

"Then what are you doing?" he asks as he leans against the wall beside me. I take one look at his amber eyes before looking away quickly and deciding that it is in my best interest not to look at him again.

"Where's Pansy?" I ask to change the subject and he laughs a little as he flicks ashes on the ground.

"Inside," he says with a shrug. "Not that it matters right now. So, if you're not hiding and you don't smoke, then why are you out here?" He stares at me when I don't answer and then I can see a smile curling on his perfect pouty lips out of the corner of my eye. "Is it because Cho is all over Draco and you can't stand to watch it?"

I make a 'spft' sound with my lips. I'm not really sure what it meant, but I was going for a disbelieving sound. "I don't care about that," I say as I tug on my borrowed shirt.

"Of course not," he says after a few silent moments. He throws his cigarette down and I inwardly rejoice, thinking he's going to go back inside but inside he turns and props his hand against the wall, giving me his full attention and practically forcing me to look at him. "Do you want to know what I think?"

"I'm sure you will tell me no matter what I say," I answer and he smiles a bit.

"You're in way over your head," he says and I furrow my brows.

"What?"

"You're playing a wicked game," he says to my utter confusion. "And you're just a little bunny hopping along, totally oblivious." He smiles again and it looks positively sinful. "You act so young… you're miles behind us, little Ginny."

"What are you talking about?"

"Just don't make it complicated," he says and then he taps my forehead with his finger. I make a face and smack his hand away. "We always get what we want in the end."

"_What_ are you talking about?" I repeat.

"Don't worry about it," he says with shrug. "I'm headed in. See you there, little one." Little one? He goes in and I frown at the door as it closes.

"Weird-o," I whisper as he walks inside. I cross my arms again and stare at the other smokers before deciding that I am going to ask Luna to go home with me after all.

On my way in I see a couple of familiar faces sitting at the bar. Seamus and Dean are at the end of the bar, watching the game and eating peanuts. I grin when I see them. "Dean?" I say as I walk towards them, thankful to see someone I know. "Seamus… what are you guys doing here?"

When Dean turns in his seat and sees me, he stands up and gives me a big bear hug that lifts me off the ground.

"We're falcons fans, you know that," Seamus says with a smirk after I give him a small side hug. I'm not as close with Seamus as I am with Dean, so it isn't as enthusiastic. "What are you doing in here? Your brother would be out for blood if he knew you were fraternizing with the enemy on game day."

I shrug one shoulder. "What Ron doesn't know won't hurt him." He'd probably just push me out of this place if he was here… that's the way he does things.

"Here, take a seat," Dean moves his jacket from one of the stools and I sit down. "Who are you here with?" he asks as I look towards my table.

"Luna and some friends…" I say and then I remember the whole benefit of the doubt thing. "Would you guys like to come and sit with us?"

"Um…" he looks over to the table I was staring at and he raises an eyebrow. "Is that Draco Malfoy and Pansy Parkinson?" he asks and I nod my head. "You hang out with them now?"

"Yeah," I say, trying not to be embarrassed by it. "It's been fun."

"Is Theodore Nott hitting on Luna Lovegood?" he asks as he squints his eyes.

"Probably," I answer honestly and he shakes his head before turning back to me.

"I thought you hated those guys?"

"I changed my mind," I say seriously. I don't want to have to get into a fight about how naïve and stupid I am. I'd rather not fight with Dean and Seamus. Seamus shrugs his shoulders before taking a drink from his bottle and Dean smirks at me before shaking his head.

"You're the boss applesauce," Dean says and I smile fondly at it because he always said that when we were dating last year.

"So, how did you both get the day off?" I ask as I lean on the bar to hear them better. "Del said that the club was going to be busy tonight."

"We asked off for this day at the beginning of the summer," Seamus answers as they both look at the screen to watch the game.

"That was smart," I say with a head nod. I watch the screen as one of the Cannon chasers scores a goal. The whole pub boos but I smirk as I give Dean a playful punch to the arm. "That's how it's done," I say and he rubs his arms as he smiles at me.

"Says the girl wearing blue and white," he says and I smirk.

"Blue looks good on me," I joke and he smiles again. Dean always had such a beautiful smile. It's too bad that I never felt anything more than mild affection for him because we would have been a smashing long term couple.

"Everything looks good on you," he says and I laugh because he hasn't tried to hit on me in months but every once and a while it will slide out and it's always so awkward.

"Of course," I say with a snort and Seamus flags down the bartender.

"Eh, do you want anything to drink, Gin?" he asks as he gets the bartenders attention.

"Could I just have a water, actually?" I ask and he gives me a funny look before ordering one for me. Thank goodness. When the glass of water is placed before me I stir the ice with my straw before taking a sip. It is refreshing after having that seven and seven thing and I don't want to get drunk tonight. My one and only experience with alcohol had kind of ruined it for me.

"Ginny," I turn on the stool and see Pansy there with her brows furrowed and an irritated look on her face. "What are you doing?"

"I'm talking to Dean and Seamus," I say as I point to the boys beside. "You guys know Pansy right?"

They both look at her and give her nods of their heads in greeting. She gives them an uncomfortable smile. "Hi," she says shortly and then she takes my arm. "Let's get back to the table," she says as she goes to move me off the stool and I smile before putting her hand off of my arm.

"I'm talking to Dean and Seamus," I repeat. "I'll come back a little later."

"Ginny," she says with an unpleasant laugh. "Come back to the table."

"No," I say with a furrowed brow. I don't want to go back there, why is she trying to make me? "I said I'll come back later."

"Ginny," she says again, leveling her dark eyes at me.

"Pansy," I answer with an uncomfortable smile. I glance over at Dean and he's watching the exchange with raised brows. "What are you doing? I'll come back later."

She stares me down for a few moments, but I'm not going to back down just yet and then she sighs. "Fine," is all she says before walking back towards the table.

"That was weird," Dean mumbles and I nod my head in agreement.

I look over at the table again. Pansy is by Draco looking exasperated as she speaks to him and he glares at her as she makes hand movements…. and then she points at me. I look down quickly. Then I look up again. Oh, crap, why is_ he _getting up? Maybe I should go back to the table. I bring my hand up and tug on a strand of my hair as he starts walking this way and I look at Dean and Seamus again, shyly tucking some hair behind my ears as I try to ignore Malfoy and his approach. I hold my breath as he passes by, but he doesn't even look at me. I watch him walk all the way to restrooms. I let my shoulders sag as I turn back to water. Why am I disappointed?

Luna comes up to me after a few moments with a smile on her face and a very uncharacteristic blush to her cheeks as I try not to worry about it.

"Oh, Ginny," she says as she says a hello to Dean and Seamus. "I am just having the best time!"

"I'm glad," I say honestly and then I glance at that Theo kid again. "Are you and that guy getting along?"

"Very well, indeed," she says with a grin and I look towards the bathroom. I tell myself that I'm not looking for him… but I guess I am. "He thinks I'm funny. Can you believe that?" I've never seen Luna act like this kind of girl and it was kind of throwing me off guard. "I don't think anyone has actually thought that. I mean, people thought I was funny as in weird funny, but not witty. You know?"

"Yeah, I know."

"I think I'm going to ask for his floo number. Would that be too bold do you think?"

"I think that is very brave," I tell her honestly as I look back at that Theo kid. He's in deep discussion with Pansy now and I make a face. "Are you sure you like him?" The last time I actually saw him was last was at Folk Hills where he was checking out my chest the whole time. "He seems a little creepy."

"I like creepy," she says with a shrug.

"Then I think it's an okay idea." I did snog Draco Malfoy… no judgments here, really.

"I want you to talk to him too. He's really smart, you'll like him."

She pulls me from the stool and I can barely get a farewell wave to Dean and Seamus before she tugs me along to the table full of Slytherins and Ravenclaws. On the way, I accidentally step on Millicent Bulstrode's shoe and she gives me a glare that could kill. I try to ignore it and Luna forces me in front of Theodore freaking Nott who has a hand on his slim hip and the other is holding a bottle of beer.

"Hey," I say awkwardly with a wave once he notices me.

"Hello," he answers back and then he smiles at Luna. Okay, then.

"Do you like Quidditch, Theo?" I ask just to say something and Luna gives me a goofy happy grin when he smirks at her.

"Yeah, I like it alright."

"Good."

"Good," he says back.

"Okay, well this was fun." I just can't stand to be this close to him anymore. He just freaks me out and the weird thing is… I have no idea why. "I'm going to talk to Daphne. Luna would you like to come?" Luna please come!

"No, Theo was just going to tell me about his father's company."

"Oh," I look at Theo as he laughs at something someone else says. "Well, if you need anything come get me." I say as I slide away from them. "I mean it," I whisper as I walk towards Daphne on the other side of the table.

I'm not letting her out of my sight.

"Ginny, come sit by me!" Daphne's cheeks are pink and I know she's getting drunk, because she stumbles as she tries to move one of the chairs out of the way.

"Are you alright?" I ask as I grab her arm to steady her. "You're kind of out of it."

"I met two of the cutest guys," she says as she looks behind her. "They're cousins."

"That's nice," I tell her with a laugh and she nods her head.

"Hey, Ginny," she says, leaning in to whisper to me. "Can I just tell you something?"

"I think you already are," I fake whisper back as she pulls on my arm so we're both sitting in the chairs. I glance up once and see Draco watching the game as Cho runs her fingers through his hair. My insides freeze and I look away quickly, feeling something unpleasant and dark in the pit of my stomach.

"I just… we're friends now, right?" she says and I nod my head. "I just wanted to tell you something…."

"Okay, what is it?" Now I'm worried…

"Come here," she whispers again, pulling me closer so that our heads are so close together that we're actually touching. "Don't make Draco jealous."

"What?"

"Sh," she says and she pulls me even closer against her so that her lips are right up against my ear. It makes me shiver and I try to pull back, but she puts her hand on my shoulder to keep me in place."Draco… I know that you didn't like seeing him with Cho, but going over and flirting with that other boy wasn't a good idea."

"Flirting? I wasn't flirting with Dean." Not that is should matter to anyone here if I was.

"Yes, you were. We all noticed that and so did he," she says and then she puts her hand on my arm again when I try to protest. "But don't do it again. Draco gets jealous very easily," she says, her breath warm on my ear. I furrow my brows and glance at him again. He's tapping his long fingers against the table and his jaw twitches when Cho says something into his ear. "And it's not good for anyone when he's upset."

"What do you mean?" I ask uncomfortably.

"Draco is intense," she says and then she scoots back and nods at me. "He's intense," she repeats as our eyes meet. "Don't go out of your way to make him mad even if it's something silly like trying to get his attention by flirting with someone else. You already have it and everything Draco does is very specific," she says. "He has a plan for everything and he doesn't like it when his plans get messed up if you know what I mean."

"No, I don't know what you mean."

"And I'll give you a little advice," she slurs as she leans against me again, ignoring what I said. "You'll need this for the future," she adds with a head nod and she glances at Draco... so do I. "Draco's cheeks only get flushed like that for two reasons," she says. I notice his face now, the splotches of red on his cheeks make him look so…. Sexy. Oh, Jesus Christ. Did I really just think that?

"What are those two reasons?" I ask as I look down at the table so I don't think anymore disgusting thoughts about him.

"Either he's really turned on," she says with a laugh. I look at him again and his silver eyes snap to mine. Fuck. I look away again, staring intently at Daphne so I won't look back. "Turned on…Or he's really pissed off."

"Okay..."

"Notice," she says as she nods towards him again. He's watching the game again I nearly sigh in relief. "How he's watching the game, but not really seeing anything? If he was turned on he would have just pulled you out of here to have his wicked way with you... no questions asked," she says as she looks at him. "Guess which one he is?"

"Pissed off," I whisper uncomfortably and she nods her head.

"Now, if you see him get that look on his face," she says, nodding her beer bottle towards him. "That cut off, stony look... avoid him at all..."

"Daphne," Pansy is over us in a second with an eyebrow arched, cutting Daphne's weird little speech off. "What are you two talking about?"

"Oh, nothing!" Daphne sings with a smile."I was just letting Ginny know that it isn't a good idea to try to make Draco jealous because you know how he gets."

"You're drunk, Daphne," Pansy says flatly as she grabs her arm and pulls her up. I stand up quickly to grab the chair because it's about ready to hit the floor. "Stop saying stupid drunk things to Ginny."

"But, Pans, you remember when he was dating that French girl last summer and she kissed that Spanish boy at your party. Do you remember what Draco did….Ow, you're hurting my arm."

"Come on, we're going to the bathroom. You're getting sloppy."

"Pansy, what does she mean?" I ask because I'm getting worried. Between this and what Blaise told me outside… I can't help but be suspicious. "What's all this talk about making people jealous? I don't understand."

"She's drunk, Gin, just ignore her. Come on, Daphne," she says as she forcefully pulls Daphne towards the bathrooms.

When they're gone, I turn towards Luna to make sure she's okay and I find her playing pool with Theodore Nott. That whole thing is just weird and I sit down in the chair and cross my arms like a child. I shouldn't have gone to this… it's just turning out to be a horrible day.

I look towards Draco and Cho again. She has her hand on his arm and he leans over to whisper something in her ear that makes her blush. That stinging sensation is back in my chest again and I clench my jaw as I turn away when she laughs. I keep to myself the rest of the night, only talking to Pansy and occasionally Luna when she pulls herself away from the creepy boy she keeps flirting with. Every once and a while I'd send a sly glance to Draco, only to find him touching or doing something cute and couple like with Cho and it made my insides freeze over. I guess he got over being 'pissed off' pretty quickly.

What was all that 'don't make him jealous' thing? He seems perfectly freaking fine.

God.

I think I'm the jealous one now.

By the time it was time to go home, I was in a terrible mood that even Luna caught onto because she didn't try to engage me in conversation as we walked to the Apparation point.

I learned something very important tonight.

I learned that Jealousy burns cold.

And I'm not even sure who won the game.

x

* * *

"I know you wanted to wear the dress on your birthday," my Mom says and I jump excitedly when I see her pull out a white gift box. "So I thought it wouldn't hurt to open one present before the big day."

"Oh, mom," I whisper as she hands me the box and I quickly pull off the red bow so I can take off the lid.

I'm so excited for my birthday now! The dress is going to look so good with those heels Pansy had given me. There's a bunch of tissue paper and I smile at my mother before pulling it aside to reveal a red dress…. a red dress with white polka dots on it. Oh… The dress I picked out didn't have polka dots and I try to hide my reaction as I start to pull it out of the box to get a better look. I must have made a face because my mom jumped in quickly.

"I know it's not the one you wanted," she says as I look it over. Its cut like every other dress my mother has ever made me. It's a typical cotton based sundress with cap sleeves and a loose fitting skirt. Only this one is bright red with white polka dots on the fabric and it has a zipper down the back and along the pockets in a cheap mockery of the dress I actually wanted. "I went to the store and had a look at that dress you picked out. I don't think you realized how short it was, sweetheart, and I looked at the materiel and I knew I could make something that was a little more… you."

I feel like crying.

"Do you like it?" she asks as I carefully put it back in the box. I look at her, trying to hide my disappointment because she's sitting on the edge of her seat, looking worried.

"Yes, of course," I say and then I give her a side hide. Any gift is better than none I suppose. "Thank you, Mom."

"And you'll wear it?" she says and I nod my head. "Why don't you go try it on, make sure it's perfect."

"Right," I say as I take the dress and walk towards the stairs with heavy steps.

"Come down when you have it on," she calls as I start walking up the stairs like it was a death march. "I want to see how it looks!"

"Alright," I say and when I reach my room I lock the door and run over to the mirror, holding the dress up against my body. It looks like something a toddler would wear. "Mom, what were you thinking?" I whisper as I take off my clothes and shimmy into the dress. Of course it fits perfectly. My Mom knows my body and how to fit it, but I feel anger boiling to the surface. I wanted that dress and I made sure it was affordable and I even had it on hold. I clench my fist and try to swallow my anger and disappointment. Any gift is better than none I tell myself again and I am not the kind of girl that would get upset about this.

I can't reach the zipper in the back, so it stays open as I go to my closet and I pull out the shoe box that's home to the heels Pansy had bought me. I think they may be the most expensive thing I own, honestly. I slip them on and go back to the mirror to see how it looks. I frown. The edgy heels with the studs don't mesh well with the cut and pattern of the dress and I cuss to myself before kicking them off and throwing on a pair of safe white sandals.

I grumpily open my bed room door and I pass Ron's bedroom where Hermione, Ron, and Harry are having one of their top secret no Ginny meetings again. I glare at his door as I pass before starting towards the stairs. My Mom stands up and grins when she sees me.

"What do you think?" She asks as I turn around and hold up my hair so she can zip it for me.

"I love it," I lie to spare her feelings and she kisses my cheek when I turn back around.

"I can't believe you're going to be sixteen," she says with a sigh as she looks me over. "You're growing up!"

"I know. It's crazy," I say, trying not to pout because I look like a child in this dress.

"So, what is the plan for tomorrow?" she asks as she takes a seat, and I sit beside her.

"Well, Luna works until five and then I think she's going to come over so we can all go out to eat somewhere."

"Have you decided where you wanted to go?" she asks as she picks up the scarf she's been knitting. I sigh when I see it but turn away as she starts knitting. "Your father would like to know if we can floo or Apparate."

"I don't know," I say with a shrug. "Nothing too fancy, I guess."

"I told your brothers what was happening. I think Bill and Fleur are going to come and George and Fred… I don't know if Charlie can make it, though." Of course, Charlie is my favorite sibling. "So, let us know by tomorrow morning where you want to eat so we can let the others know."

"I'll think on it," I tell her and then I give her a smile. "I think I'm going to take a shower, get ready for tomorrow."

"Alright, sweetie," she says. "Make sure you hang up the dress, you don't want to wrinkle it."

"No, I don't," I sigh as I make it back upstairs. I hang up my dress on the back of my closet door and I stare at it for a few sad moments before putting on my robe and walking towards the bathroom to run myself a bath.

I clean my body and shave my legs as I try not to think about that stupid dress in my room. My Mom can be so dense sometimes. I really wanted to look grown up and pretty on my birthday…now I'm just going to look like a kid who was trying too hard to be cool. I shake my head and get out of the bath, trying to let it go. Tomorrow is going to be a good day no matter what. I drain the tub as I throw on my robe so I can go to bed. I find Hermione sitting on her cot when I get to my room, going through a newspaper with her pj's on.

"Is the top secret meeting over?" I ask as I go to my closet so I can change into pj's. She doesn't say anything, and I really didn't think she would because my tone was so derisive.

"Is that dress new?" she asks when I come back into the room in sleep shorts and a tank top.

I look at the red polka dot dress hanging on the back of the door as I reach under my shirt to unhook my bra. I nod my head while I pull it out and put it in the hamper. "That's my Mom's birthday present," I say as I fall down onto the bed.

"I thought you wanted that dress you showed me," she says curiously.

"I did," I say with sigh. "But she made that one because she thought it was more 'me'" I answer, making air quotations.

"Oh," she says as she looks at the dress. "It is cute."

"If you're five, maybe," I say and she gives me a sad smile.

"So, I was thinking maybe you'd like to open your birthday present from me tonight," she says with a nervous smile as I sit up to face her.

"Why not just give it to me tomorrow?"

She stands up and reaches into one of her bags. "I just want to give it to you tonight," she says as she hands me a present wrapped in gold wrapping paper.

"Thank you, Hermione," I say honestly as I run my fingers over the paper. Hermione always gets me the best gifts.

"Open it," she says as she sits beside me.

I start tearing the paper and I smirk when I see the leather bound journal with my name in gold letters across the front.

"I thought you'd like a more professional place to put your writings," she says as I flip through the pages. I love the smell of new parchment. "And I noticed your other notebook was falling apart thanks to Ronald."

"Thanks," I tell her with an honest smile. "I love it."

"And," she says as she pulls three blue quills from behind her back. "I also got you auto correct quills. It's perfect when you're writing with ink," she says as I take the quills from her. Sometimes I forget how much I love her.

"Thanks Hermione. I really appreciate this."

"You're welcome. I hope you have a good birthday tomorrow."

"Me too."

We go to sleep after that and when I wake up, Hermione isn't on her cot. I shrug it off, figuring she's down stairs helping my Mom make the birthday pancakes. Everyone gets birthday pancakes on their birthday… it's a Weasley family tradition. I smile as I think on it and I put on that stupid polka dot dress before doing my makeup for the day. I braid my hair to the side so it falls in front of my shoulder and I smile at myself in the mirror, wondering if I look older. I want to look good on my birthday after all. I look at myself in the mirror for a while and I smooth down the skirt of the dress before zipping up the zipper as far as I can get it on my own. It doesn't look too bad today actually. I guess I'm in a good mood.

I skip down the stairs and wait for the song that usually greets me in the morning of my birthday, but I don't hear it. In fact, when I enter the kitchen it's uncommonly bear… no Mom or Ron or birthday pancakes. I take tentative steps around the house until I reach the back room, where I find my Mom crying as she reads a letter and my Dad is holding onto her shoulders.

"Hey?" I say when I enter the room, stopping in the doorway because I don't want to get closer. Nothing good can make my mother cry like that and it makes me nervous.

"Oh, Ginny dear," Mom tries to wipe her eyes as she stands up. "What a state we're in."

"What's wrong?"

"Your brother left last night," she says as she shakes the letter. My heart drops. "With Hermione and Harry and we have no idea where they are. Oh, Arthur, they know how dangerous it is out there."

"We're going to talk to Remus," My Dad says as he stands up and puts on his cloak. He gets one for my Mom as well and puts it over her shoulder. "This is important, Gin. Do you think you can stay here for me? We'll be back in a few hours. We just need to speak to the Order about this. They could be in danger."

"Yeah… sure…."

They start walking towards the front door and I follow them the whole way with a frown on my face. "Alright, Ginny," my Mom says as she kisses my forehead. "Be good."

"We'll be back soon," my Dad says as they start walking towards the Apparation point.

"Happy Birthday, Ginny," I say to their retreating backs. They pop away and then I slam the door shut as I go to make myself something to eat.

How could they leave on my birthday! Suddenly that whole 'giving you your present early' thing Hermione pulled last night makes me feel bitter because she knew! Ugh. I eat my toast and glare at the flowery curtains that are above the sink. Luna is at work and she won't be home until later, so I really have no one right now. I need more freaking friends. I call Fred and George on their floo line… no answer. I even try Charlie in the hopes of talking to someone I like, but he's not home either. They might be at that Order thing as well talking about Harry and Ron and Hermione. Everyone is always talking about them. It's my sixteenth birthday for Christ sakes!

After a ranting journal entry into my new notebook, I go towards the shed to get my bike so I can go see Pansy. I'm sure she's home and she can hang out with me so I don't sit for hours by self waiting for something to happen.

I pump my legs as fast as I can and I make it to Pansy's large house in record time. The same grumpy elf answers the door after I ring the door bell and when I ask for Pansy, the elf shakes its head. Of course, Pansy isn't freaking home and I don't know where Daphne lives so I get on my bike and try not to cry like a baby as I ride around the village for a while. I stop when I pass by Malfoy's large summer home and I shake my head before taking off again… only to turn right back around to stare at it again. I bite the corner of my lip before wheeling up to the gate and pressing the red button.

I have no idea why I'm doing this. It's just… I know he kind of might like me… and I don't want to be alone on my birthday.

"Malfoy residence," Some squeaky voice answers and I clear my throat before leaning towards the speaker.

"Hi," I say softly. "Is, um, is Draco home today?"

"Yes, the Master is home. Who is calling?"

"It's… It's Ginny," I say uncomfortably as the bike rests between my legs. "Ginny Weasley."

There's a quiet moment and then the gate starts to slowly creek open. Okay, then. I wheel my bike inside and rest it against the fountain as I approach the door. Before I can knock or ring the door bell, it creeps open as well. Right. I take a tentative step inside and look around the hallway with my hands behind my back awkwardly. What do I do now? The ceilings here are impossibly high and I glance up. There's some kind of painting of clouds and cherubs on the ceiling like this house was some kind of important building that deserved such a fresco. When I look at the furnishings and perfectly polished floors… I can't help but be envious as I think of my own home.

There are freshly cut flowers in a vase by the door and I step towards them so I can smell the fragrance. I lean forward and close my eyes as I inhale against the petals. Lilacs, they smell wonderful… I hear footsteps on the stairs and I jump back as Draco makes his way down, looking at me with a raised eyebrow. I feel like he caught me doing something bad, so I step away from the flowers and I bring my hand up to my neck nervously.

"Why are you here?" he asks with his hand on the railing.

I shrug my shoulders as I stare at him. He's wearing one of those well fitted suits again; only this one is a lighter gray color with a crimson dress shirt and black tie. "It's my birthday," I say softly as I look down at the marble floor, feeling foolish and childlike. "It's my birthday and no one cares but me it seems."

"So you came here?" he questions suspiciously and I cross my arms under my breasts. I'm very aware of this stupid dress now as he stares me down.

"No one else was home," I say honestly and when I look up, his lips are quirked in a barely there smile. "I'll leave now… if you want…" I start heading towards the door again.

"Stop." I look over my shoulder as he makes his way down the stairs."Your dress is halfway unzipped," he says and I blush as he walks towards me. "You left the house like this?"

"Yes," I say as he makes a motion for me to turn around. I do as he instructs and I put my head down. "I couldn't reach the zipper by myself this morning," I admit as he zips it up for me and then he lets his fingers linger along my shoulders before they drop.

"Are those the only shoes you brought?" he asks, nodding to my cheap flip flops and I give him an odd look before nodding my head and facing him again. "Alright, then…. Kara." He tilts his head to call for someone and I jump in surprise when a house-elf pops at my side. I even put my hand over my heart. "Have Linny bring out the bike and then find some decent riding shoes for Ginny," he tells the elf as he nods to me. "What size do you wear?" he questions with an eyebrow raised as he takes off his jacket and hands it to the elf.

"Oh… um… I wear a size eight…."

"You heard her, then," he says to the elf as he loosens his tie and hands that to the creature once it's undone. "Size eight."

The elf pops away and once it's gone, I give Draco a questioning look while he walks over to a cloak closet, unbuttoning the first few buttons on his dress shirt. "What's wrong with my shoes?" I ask as he takes out two leather high top boots from the closet and he puts them on after carefully slipping off the expensive looking leather loafers he was wearing.

"You need something to protect your feet," he says as he walks past me towards the front door.

"Why?"

"Because I said so," is all he says as he opens the front door and makes a motion for me to follow after him.

I refuse to move for a few seconds. He can come across as so rude and I automatically want to not do as he says just because he assumes I will. After a second of silence I huff and follow after him, following him around the house to a large three story garage where a small elf with sparse graying hair is wheeling out a magnificent looking motorbike.

"That's cool," I can't stop myself from saying as I get a good look at the chrome siding and black leather seats.

Draco smirks as the elf hands him a pair of sunglasses and he slides them on as another elf tugs on my hand. I look to my left at the little creature as it hands me a pair of close toed boots. I hesitate a moment before taking them from the elf as Draco hops on the bike.

He looks really good on it.

Oh, for fucks sake.

"Put them on," he says as he fidgets with the handle bars and he uses a key to turn it on until it comes to life. "You'll want your toes covered, trust me."

"You're going to give me a ride on your motorbike?" I ask as I walk closer to him and eye the machine with suspicion. He kicks the kick stand and revs the engine before handing me a helmet. Hagrid is the only other person I know who has a motorbike and his could fly. I didn't want any part of that...

My parents would hate this... Ron would hate this... Harry would... Alright, I am going to get on the bike.

"Wear this," he demands as I take the black helmet from him with a frown.

"Are you wearing one?" I question as I put it on and buckle the strap under my chin. I push the bangs out of my eyes and blink a few times. He rolls his sleeves up to his elbows and licks his lips. I look down because it makes me uncomfortable. Oh, dear.

"I don't need one," he answers pompously. "Once you're all in order, hop on behind me," he says as I take off my sandals so I can slip on the brown suede ankle boots.

"I don't want to wear this," I say because the helmet is too big and it keeps sliding over my eyes.

"You're going to. If we crash, your head is going to break and splatter into a million different pieces all over the ground." That's a great visual. Not the greatest thing to say to the person you want to ride with you, though. "You're wearing the helmet."

"Your head could break and splatter into a million different pieces," I point out with a frown and he smirks a little.

"My head isn't as pretty as yours," he says and I feel my cheeks heat up at the compliment. I don't know why I find myself pleased that he said that. "Get on the bike."

"I don't…." I stop. I stare at him as he checks the gears and the gages with his sunglasses halfway down his nose. His silver eyes flick to mine and my cheeks heat up. "I don't know if this is a good idea."

"Ginny," he says seriously after a long pause.

"Yes?" I answer when he doesn't continue right away.

He pushes his sunglasses up and sits straight. "Get on the damn bike."

I bite back my hateful comment before sliding on behind him, trying not to flash the world my knickers in the process. He is the only person willing to hang out with on my birthday… I should be a little more forgiving. And my parents would hate it… that's really what's driving most of this. Once seated securely behind him, I try various ways to scoot back so I don't have to touch him and so that my thighs aren't cradled around him, but it's not working very well for me and when he starts moving the bike forward with a hit of the gas, I panic and wrap my arms around his slim waist.

"Don't go so fast," I plead as he takes off, leaving his house and my sandals behind. I clench my eyes shut and tilt my chin down against his back as we zoom onto the dirt road.

"Relax," he says over his shoulder. I grip the front of his shirt as the wind whips us. "You're not going to die."

"Where are we going?"

"Stop talking," he demands and I bite my cheek to stop myself from snapping at him. He is driving after all and I don't want to make us crash.

I'm glad about the whole boot thing… the rocks are kicking up from the road as we pass them and even mud from the grass is splattering us as we went by. My feet would have been a mess in my sandals and I'm silently grateful that Draco made me wear them. He smells nice too and I'm glad that I'm behind him because he won't notice me inhaling against his shirt like a creep.

I try to keep track of where we're going as I squint against the wind and sunlight. We pass by the Village of Yellow Springs and we pass by another small town before I start seeing larger buildings and crowded streets…. Dirt roads give way to concrete pavement and kerosene lamps. I hold onto him a little tighter as he swerves in and out of the heavier traffic and I close my eyes when we pass over a bridge because it's scary.

When I finally open them, we're zooming into a parking garage and I furrow my brows again as he finds a parking spot.

"Where are we?" I question as he turns off the bike.

"You'll see," he says as I slide to the ground and take off that stupid helmet.

"That's rather vague." I tell him as I try to straighten out my hair and he smirks at me as he takes the helmet and puts it in the seat that flips up for storage.

"Follow me," he says in that deep voice of his as he puts one hand in his pocket and the other he uses to steer me forward.

I glance up at the large building we're approaching with a curious tilt of my head. It's an Aquarium and it has large posters of whales and other sea creatures plastering the front of it.

"An Aquarium?" I say curiously as we start walking up the stairs.

"It just opened last week," he explains as he opens the door for me to step inside. I'm not actually used to people doing that for me and it's throwing me off. "It's pretty wonderful."

"Oh," I say uncomfortably as I step inside and I look around the large welcoming lobby. "Draco, I didn't bring any money," I whisper as we make our way to one of the lines so we can pay for our tickets.

Draco makes a noise and when I glance up at him, he's shaking his head as he pushes his sunglasses to the top to his head. "You wouldn't pay even if you did," he says as he puts both hands in his pockets. "Not only is it your birthday, but you're the girl in this equation," he says and I frown as he walks towards front desk once the line starts moving. "That might not mean much where you come from, but in my world, ladies do not pay when a gentlemen is present so stop looking so surprised."

"There's a gentleman present?" I joke as I look around, trying to spot one and he smiles at me. It makes me pause for a second because I don't think I ever realized how beautiful his smile truly was.

"If I'm not a gentleman," he whispers against my hair as he slides coins over to the woman at the desk. "Than what kind of woman are you, I wonder?"

"A stupid one," I say and he glances down at me before ignoring the comment.

I've never been to an aquarium before, but it is beautiful. It's all inside and dark, with large fish tanks full of things I had never seen before and creatures I've only read about in books.

"What do you think?" he asks as we walk past a wall full of jelly fish that glow in the dark. The aquarium is pretty dead on this Tuesday afternoon, so Draco and I are couple of the only people here. It makes it kind of nice. Every museum or zoo I've ever been too has always been annoyingly crowded, but this was fun.

"This is wonderful," I say as I walk close to the glass as the jelly fish move around like ghosts in the water. "Thank you, Draco," I say honestly as I smile at him over my shoulder. He smirks, of course. It's his go to expression, I guess. "Have you been here before?" I ask. I know he said that it just opened, but how did he hear about this place?

"Yes, my mother was here for the opening," he says as we walk further in, seeing more exotic fish that glow and swim about in the black water. "She loves this kind of thing," he says with a sigh.

"This kind of thing?" I question with my hands in my pockets as we walk to another section. This seems to be smaller and brighter, with clown fish and other colorful sea life. "What does that mean?"

"Well, she's big into animal rights," he explains and I stare at his profile as he stares stoically ahead of him. "She started a charity for it a few years ago. When my parents made a donation to this Aquarium, it was with the agreement that ten percent of the ticket sales would be donated to the charity," he says and I look away thoughtfully. I couldn't see any Malfoy being charitable and loving animals, honestly. "It always makes her happy when she has a cause. It gives her something to do," he adds dryly.

"Has her cause always been animal rights?" I ask as we move towards the dolphin section. It's much brighter and I figure their section must be outside. I walk closer to the glass as two dolphins swim by and I smile at them.

"Not always," he says with a little smile as he looks down at me. "Before animals it was starving magical children in third world countries and before that I think it was cancer."

"Cancer?" I say and then I make a face that he laughs at. "So… you're mother was only worried about starving magical children?" I say, watching him from the corner of my eye. "Not the muggle ones as well?"

"Unfortunately my mother isn't that charitable," he says with an amused voice and I actually laugh.

"Alright," he says once we reach a fork in the hallway. "If we go to the right we'll see squid and sting rays… the bigger sea creatures," he says. "Or we could go to the left and see magical sea life. The place is like a big ring and it goes in one big circle so we'll see everything regardless… but the choice is up to you."

"What kind of magical things are here?" I ask curiously as I look down the left hallway.

"Well, they have some rare sea monsters and some mermaids, I know that," he says as he crosses his arms.

"Mermaids," I say happily and he nods his head.

"They don't look how you think they would," he warns and I nod my head as I start walking down the left hallway. "They're actually ugly," he says. He follows behind me as I speed walk towards the mermaids.

"I know," I say with a bounce to my step. "Harry told me they were gross, but I just would love to see one."

"Ginny, we don't have to run there," Draco says, trying to keep up with me. "They're still going to be there if we walk at a normal pace."

I ignore him until we get to the mermaid exhibit.

"There are three types," he says as we pass the first tank. "These are the fresh water kinds that are in the lake at Hogwarts. Merrows," he explains as I walk over to the glass and squint my eyes. The water is almost green like a dirty lake and when I finally see something in the water, I roll on my toes in excitement.

"Can mermaids speak English?" I ask curiously. It would be nice to talk to a mermaid I imagine.

"They have their own language," he says and then one swims by the glass. Draco was right, they aren't very pretty, but I was excited none the less. The creature that passed looked like it was a male, with a strong human looking chest and a fish tail. Its hair was long and green and it had sharp teeth that protruded from its mouth like some kind of monster. "And they're too stubborn to try to learn anything else," he says when the mermaid disappears.

"Oh," I say and then I feel his hand on my back again, pushing me towards the next exhibit. "This section holds the sirens," he says as we walk into a darker part. "They live in the darkest part of the ocean. All merpeople sing, but the sirens are supposed to have the most beautiful voices in the world."

I walk close to the glass because I can't see anything in the black water and I stand there for a few minutes, seeing nothing until suddenly something smacks against the glass and I jump back, right into Draco's chest. He laughs as the mermaid stares at us and I put my hand on my heart because it scared me. This one is a little better looking, but its whole body is silver and scaly, from its neck all the way down to its fish tail. This one is definitely a girl and I blush as I try not to look at her chest while she tilts her head to the side. Her hair is as black as the water and her eyes are glowing and yellow. It's an altogether frightening combination that makes the actual beauty of her face obsolete.

"What is she doing?" I ask uncomfortably as I slide behind Draco like a coward so she's not staring at me anymore. "Why's she looking at us?"

"She's not looking at us," Draco says as I peek at the mermaid from behind his shoulder while other people from the aquarium start gathering around to look at the mermaid as well. "This glass is a two way mirror," he says with a little smile, like he was amused by my stupid behavior. "She's looking at herself."

"Do mermaids like being in this aquarium?" I ask as the mermaid starts swimming from side to side in front of the glass as people take pictures with their cameras. "I thought they were similar to people… like centaurs."

"They don't know they're in here," Draco says. "They were transported magically and their habitat was replicated in perfect detail. If they knew, they'd probably try to kill us."

"That's pleasant," I say and he laughs as he turns to face me. "Let's go see the next one," he says as more people crowd around. "It's getting a little tight in here."

I nod my head.

"Do you know about these as well?" I ask as we walk into another section.

"They're selkies," he says. It's definitely brighter in here and it hurts my eyes at first before I see seal looking creatures swimming behind the glass.

"They don't look like merpeople," I say with my eyebrows raised.

"Just watch," Draco says from behind me and I stare at the creatures for a few moments before I see one of them change into a human and then flick right back into a seal.

"What was that?" I ask with a smile as another does the same thing.

"They're kind of like shape shifters," he says with a smug smile. "They can change into humans, but it never lasts very long."

I stare at the selkie mermaids for a little bit, smiling as they flicker back and forth between humans and seals. Then I notice Draco's reflection in the glass as he stands slightly behind me. He's not looking at the creatures in front of me… he's looking at me and then I see his hand reaching out and grabbing some fabric from the skirt of my dress. I barely feel it, but I can see him as he stares at it and runs his fingers over the materiel. He looks up at the back of my neck again before his eyes find mine in the glass.

I look away quickly and try to ignore the flutter in my stomach. Pansy said to give him the benefit of the doubt and he really hasn't done anything to me so far. Does he really like me? He's being perfectly pleasant and he's being kinder to me now on my birthday than my whole family has been. I look at his reflection again. He's not holding my dress anymore and his head is tilted towards the tank on the opposite wall that has a large manatee swimming around in it.

I look at him over my shoulder after I scrounge up the courage and he turns his head back to mine. I give him a grateful smile and he takes a step closer to me while bringing his hand up to my face, running his knuckles over my cheek. I inhale a shaky breath and my stomach tumbles around when he runs his thumb over my lips. I stop breathing all together.

"Are you pleased that I brought you here?" he asks quietly and I nod my head because I can't seem to find my voice "Even though I was the last choice."

"Yes," I say with a head nod as I look back at the mermaids. "This is one of the better birthdays I've had."

"I'm glad then," he says as he lets his hand drop. I stare at it for a few moments before gathering up the courage to grab it.

He raises an eyebrow at me as I intertwine our fingers, but he doesn't pull away as I give him a small smile.

He smiles back.

We hold hands the rest of the day as we check out the rest of the aquarium and we even grab lunch in a little restaurant across the street. It was surprisingly wonderful and I found that I was actually enjoying Draco's company. He's as smart as Hermione is, as good looking as Harry, and as funny as my brother… he was like the perfect combination of a person and he didn't even say one hateful thing to me. It was nice.

"It's getting late," he says comments after we leave the restaurant, headed back towards the parking garage. I look down at his hand, wondering if I should take it again, but I don't want to seem desperate, so I look away from it. But I can't help but smile when he puts his arm around my waist as we cross a busy street. "You can get your bike another day. I don't want you riding home in the dark," he says when we reach the garage and he takes out the key to his bike. I take out the helmet and put it on as he straddles the bike and starts it. "I'll just drop you off at your house."

"No, that's okay," I say quickly because I don't want him to see where I live. I slide behind him and put my arms around his waist as my legs cradle his body again. "I can just ride my bike."

"Ginny," he snaps as he starts wheeling us out of the parking garage."You're not riding home in the dark by yourself. That's it. Now stop talking."

I roll my eyes as we zoom into traffic and I put my chin against his shoulder as he swerves in and out of the cars. The whole snappy demand thing right now doesn't even seem as irritating to me for some reason. "Be careful, please," I whisper against his neck because he's speeding and he knows it. "Oh, Draco you have to stop at the red lights!" I scold because he just ran one.

"I don't need you screaming in my ear every second," he says when we reach a stop sign and he slows down the bike to a stop. "If you don't like the way I'm driving, then just close your eyes until we're home, alright?"

"But you're going too fast," I say seriously as he starts the bike again.

"If you keep talking, then we are going to crash. So just close your eyes until I say you can open them."

"Fine," I whisper as I close my eyes and press myself into his back.

After a while, I crack my eyes open, realizing we're on the road, headed towards my house and I panic. "Right here is fine," I say and he shakes his head and turns his face so I can hear him better.

"You don't live in the middle of a field, babe," he says and my heart swells at the nickname but I stamp it down. "Let me drop you off at your house."

"No, really, this is fine. If my parents see you pulling up on a motorbike they'll kill me."

He starts slowly down the bike and he stops in front of an old oak tree. I guess that was a good enough excuse. "You won't have far to walk?" he asks. I slide off the bike and I take off the helmet.

"Not too far," I assure him as I put the helmet in the case thing there. "I can give these boots back another time, yeah?" I say and he nods his head as he takes off his sunglasses and puts them in his shirt pocket. "Thank you for today, Draco," I say honestly as I stand beside him with my fingers intertwined in front of me. "I really do appreciate it."

"It was my pleasure," he says with a smug smile as he leans back on the bike looking all handsome and….off limits. He makes me uncomfortable.

"Okay, well… bye then," I say awkwardly and I start walking away.

"Hey, now," he says as he grabs my hand and pulls me back towards him. ""That's it? That's all I get?"

"What do you mean?" I ask as he runs his fingers over the skin of my wrist.

"Come here," he says as he pulls me closer to him and I laugh as I lose my balance, having to place my hands on his shoulders so I don't fall. "Are you going to explain this dress?" he asks with an amused smile and I look down with a laugh. "Not that I don't like it or anything…"

"I know it's terrible," I say with a sigh. "My mother made it for me. It's nothing like the dress I actually wanted."

"Why didn't she just get you the dress you wanted?" he asks as runs his fingers along the zipper lined pocket.

"You're asking the wrong person," I joke and the corner of his lip turns up in a little smile. "At least she tried."

"That is all we can hope for," he says as he brings a hand up to tilt my chin towards him. "Happy birthday, Gin."

We stare at each other for a few moments before I lean down. Oh, holy hell I'm going to kiss him. And of course it's amazing as soon as my lips press against his. So, it's my sixteenth birthday and here I am, making out with Draco Malfoy on an old dirt road. Who would have guessed it? He puts his hand on the back of my thigh and I think he's going to touch my bottom, so I freeze up, but he urges me to lift my leg and then I find myself straddling his bike with my dress hiked up so I can wrap my legs around his.

Making out like this on a motorbike out in the open where anyone can see seemed dangerous… and with Draco Malfoy no less. A thrill goes through me at the thought and I can tell that it's going to be a an addicting feeling. I start to tug down my dress the best I can in my straddling position as he holds me firmly against him, kissing me in a heated way that makes me almost dizzy. He tastes like the coffee he had at that little restaurant and I wonder if I taste like ice cream I indulged in. When he moves to my neck I nearly faint from the sensations. I fist his shirt like a desperate thing as one of his hands stays firmly on my waist. The other rubs the skin of my thigh as he places open mouthed kissed on my shoulder.

"You have such smooth skin," he mumbles as he bites my neck. I inhale and press my chest against his as he squeezes my leg. "And you always look so clean."

"What?" I say. Clean? What is that supposed to mean?

He pulls back to look at me. His eyes are catching the dying sun just right that make them look like steel. "Ginny, I'm going to be honest with you," he says and I swallow hard. This can't be good. "I think we could be great together."

Oh.

He starts kissing me again, running his tongue along my lips until I open for him again, tilting my head to the side with a small sigh. He's such a good kisser… Pansy was right…. Pansy was right because she had kissed him before… and so has Cho. In fact, I caught him and Cho doing something gross in a supply closet not too long ago… He's a whore… remember? But he kisses so well. Wait. This isn't right. I am not this girl.

"Wait." What is this? "Wait," I whisper again as I slightly push him back. His eyes are dark and his lips are pink... His cheeks are flushed... I'm pretty sure he's not angry right now so that can only mean that he's enjoying this. "I…" I was going to tell him that I needed to go home, but that's not what came out. "I don't want you to be with Cho."

He smiles smugly again, like he knew I would say that. That's just annoying. "Okay," is all he says.

"Okay?" I say back. "That's it?"

"That's it," he says as he kisses the corner of my mouth. "I didn't really like her that much anyways."

I force my eyebrows together at that. He's very nonchalant about hurting someone's feelings. His fingers come up and he runs them over my nose and the furrow of my brows.

"What's got you looking so worried all of a sudden," he asks in a husky whisper. I don't say anything because I can't exactly articulate what I'm thinking.

"What is this?" I ask as I look into his eyes. "Why is this happening?" I whisper and he cocks his head to the side.

"Why do we have to define it right now?" he asks with a shrug. That's really not what I wanted to hear… even though I'm not sure what would be. "We had a good day today and I know you enjoyed it. I'm not the monster you thought I was. Am I?"

I shake my head.

"Good," is all he says as he leans back a bit, with his arm behind him to keep balance. I try to pull down my dress again so he doesn't see anything he shouldn't. "Do you work tomorrow?" he asks as I start climbing off of the bike.

"In the morning," I say as I nod my head.

"I'll probably stop by and see you." I spare him a glance as he starts up his bike. I don't move for a few moments and he kisses my cheek one more time. "See you later, beautiful."

I don't think anyone has ever called me beautiful before…

"Can I ask you a question?" I say quickly before he can take off and he raises his eyebrows before pushing his sunglasses up to give me his full attention again.

"You can ask me anything."

"Daphne mentioned some French girl you dated last summer," I say as I start fiddling with the zipper lined pockets on my dress.

"Why would she say anything about that?" he asks, his voice sounding hard.

"She just mentioned it," I say with a shrug, not wanting to get her in trouble. "But she said you did something to some bloke who kissed her... What did you do?"

He's silent for a moment and then he puts his sunglasses back on. "I punched his teeth in," he says and I cringe. "She was my girlfriend and they kissed at a party at my house. I overreacted maybe, but at least I did something." I'm not sure if that's sound logic... "Why did Daphne feel the need to tell you that?" he asks stiffly.

"Will you punch her teeth in if I tell you?"I question and he tilts his head to the side. I don't like that I can't see his eyes, so I bring my hands up and slowly pull them off of his face.

"It wouldn't be a fair fight," he says seriously. "I don't hit girls… no matter how annoying they are," he adds. I think he could have left that bit off, actually.

"She was just drunk," I say with a shrug as I fold up his glasses. "I don't think she knew what she was saying." He stares at me for a while as I look down at my hands. "Will you... stop telling me to shut up all the time," I tell him. If I want to see him more, I can't have him constantly saying that to me when I say something he doesn't like. "It bothers me."

He places a gentle kiss against my lips. I'm taking that as his agreement so I slide his sunglasses back on his face. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay," I whisper and I watch him take off down the road before turning the opposite way towards my house.

By the time I get home, the sun has officially set and the moon is out, lighting everything in an eerie glow. The lights are on in the kitchen, so I know my parents are home and when I open the front door I'm met with the upset voice of my mother.

"Ginevra Molly Weasley, where have you been?" She runs over to me and envelopes me in the tight hug before pulling back to glare. "Your brother goes missing and you just up and leave when we specifically told you to stay in the house. We were worried sick!"

"I'm sorry," I say as I try to pry myself away from her. My Dad, Fred, George, Bill, Luna, and Fleur are all sitting around the kitchen table. There's a birthday cake in the center of it.

"Where have you been?" My Dad asks as I slip out of the suede boots. My Mom notices them. "We're all ready to celebrate your sweet sixteen."

"Where did you get those?" she asks suspiciously, eyeing the boots.

"I was just out with a friend," I say and then I look at Luna as she raises her eyebrows. "I'm going upstairs to freshen up." I say, giving Luna a pointed look and she stands up as well to follow me up the stairs.

When we get to the room, I close the door and give Luna a smile. "I'm sorry I'm late," I tell her. "But I've had the best birthday."

"I heard that Harry, Ron, and Hermione left," she says as I fall onto my bed with a silly smile on my face as I touch my lips. "Who were you with? Pansy?"

"No," I say as I shake my head. "I was with Draco Malfoy."

"Really?" she says as I look over at Hermione's empty cot.

"Yes," I say with a head nod. Her empty cot makes me think of how she left, how Harry and Ron left…. How they left me with no one but Draco freaking Malfoy on my birthday. "Yes, I think we could be great together."

"Great together?" she repeats and I nod my head with a little smile as I remember the thrill of being on his bike.

"Great, indeed"


	4. Chapter 4

"I think I'm going to go take a nap," I say in passing to my mother as I walk towards the stairs. "Don't bother waking me up for dinner. I'm pretty tired." I even find enough in me to fake a yawn.

"Are you sure?" My Mom asks as I start up the stairs. I pause and look down so I can convince her not to check on me. I have plans that would be ruined if she decided to check on me. "I'm making lasagna tonight."

"Yeah, I'm sure. I ate a big lunch." _Stop talking to me._ "A huge lunch actually. I don't think I could eat another bite.

"Alright….If you're sure."

"I'm sure!" I yell as I run up the rest of the stairs and I go towards my room to avoid talking to her more. She has been all over me the past week and it's annoying to no end.

When I get to my room, I close the door and lock it with sigh as I lean against the wood. I smile a little to myself and then I go over to my radio and I turn it loud enough to where my parents can hear it, but not loud enough for them to yell at me for it. I want them to think I'm in here after all.

Since my birthday I've been on virtual house arrest. Not because I was in trouble… My parents soon forgave my tardiness to my own freaking birthday party because I suspect they felt guilty about the whole leaving me alone on my sixteenth birthday thing. What happened with Ron, Hermione, and Harry really scared them and I'm reaping the rewards of it. I'm only allowed to leave the house for work and even then my Mother Apperates me there and picks me up like I was a child. I can't even go over to Luna's… not that I would get a chance to anyways… she's been hanging out with that Theodore Nott creep so much lately that she has barely enough time to answer one of my owls.

I quickly strip out of my casual clothes and I pull out the navy shirt dress that Pansy had picked out for me. Of course, just because my parents won't let me leave the house on my own... that doesn't mean I'm going to do as they say. I put the brown belt to cinch in the waist as I button the dress up the front and I slip into a pair of silver sandals that are new and pretty and sparkle in the sun. I bought a lot of new clothes recently. I didn't like feeling shabby next to my new friends and I was happy that I could finally afford them on my own... But it was all Draco's doing. After my birthday, he did show up at the club the next morning, looking his usual good looking self and my heart warmed when he smiled at me.

"Good morning," he said to me and he did the cutest thing. He actually half leaned, half hopped over the table to place a kiss against my lips.

I knew I was in over my head the moment that happened. It was official. I liked him.

"Good morning to you too," I had replied with a shy smile and I sent a quick glance around to make sure no one else was there to see what just happened. "Did you get all dressed up for me?"I asked. He was wearing another smart looking suit and I felt like pointing it out because I kept looking him up and down. It was a traditional black color, with a blue shirt and of course he looks amazing in it.

He looked down at his outfit and then back to me. "I'm an intern," he said as he placed his sunglasses into his front pocket.

"At the ministry?" He nodded his head. Of course, I knew that because Luna had mentioned it. "What do you do there?"

He shrugged and leaned against the counter, giving me his full attention. He smelled nice so I leaned in as well. "Right now I'm shadowing a Wizengamot representative. Nothing too exciting really, but it gets you in with the right people."

"Do you ever see the Minister?" I asked. I felt more familiar with him after my birthday. I felt more comfortable.

He nodded his head. "All the time."

"That must be fun." My Dad works at the Ministry, but I've never even been in the same room as the Minister of magic. "Do you like him?"

Draco shrugged and picked off something that was stuck on his suit jacket, flicking it to the side. "He's kind of thick actually. His wife is really the one who does all the work for him. I have no idea why she let him take center stage."

"Oh," I didn't know that much about it so I looked down. "Do you want to go into politics then? Is that why you're there now?"

He nodded his head. "That's the plan," he answered and I remembered what Daphne had said at the pub: Draco has a plan for everything. "This internship puts me in a good position to build the right relationships and to get my name out there. Politics is all about who you know and what story you have to fall back on." He smiled at me then. "But that's enough about me. What about you?" he asks raising an amused eyebrow and it made my heart speed up. "What do you want to be when you grow up?" he teased.

"I don't know," I lied. I knew exactly what I wanted to do… I just didn't have enough courage to explain.

He hung around for a while after that, talking about his internship and asking me questions about myself before checking his watch and glancing behind him. He stood straight because someone was approaching and he slid to the left when Mrs. Randolf reached the counter, carrying a large pool bag and a floppy hat.

"Oh, hey Ginny," she said with a grin as she took off that stupid hat and she put it down in front of me. "How is your day going?"

"It's good," I replied with a fake smile and she nodded her head as she dug through her bag. I sent a look to Draco and he smiled at me as she took out her wallet.

"That's great. I'm going to pop out for lunch, but I'll probably be back after one to go back to the pool. Do I look any tanner," she asked and then she glanced to her left where Draco was still leaning against the counter like he owned it. She straightened up right away and gave him a beauty pageant smile that I rolled my eyes at. "Why, hello Mr. Malfoy," she greeted him with a _real_ grin as she held out her hand.

He shook it gently before giving it back to her. "How are you doing this morning, Charlotte?"

_Charlotte_… Even the way he said her name sounded ridiculous to me at the time.

"Oh, I am doing perfectly well," she answered with a girlish smile as she turned her body away from me. I suspect it was to but me me out of the conversation and I was slightly annoyed by it. I sighed, then, and took the bag and hat so I could place them in one of the lockers. "How's Narcissa doing?" she asked as I put her things away, and I took the ticket came out so I could give it to her. "I haven't seen her in weeks."

"My Mother is doing well," Draco answered formally, sounding like the perfect gentlemen. I smiled at the thought as I walked back towards them. "Her and my Father just returned from Australia, actually. She was taking a small holiday."

"If anyone deserves a small holiday it's your mother," she said with a fake laugh and I rolled my eyes again and put her ticket on the counter top. "So, I heard that the debutant ball is going to be at the Manor this year," she said and Draco nodded as he put a hand into his pocket.

"I think my parents are just disappointed that they never had a girl," he said with a polite smile. "They may be living vicariously through everyone else."

She laughed for a while and it was kind of odd but I learned that Draco could play the part of the polite young aristocrat quite efficiently.

"I'm sure you'll just love having those lovely ladies in your home to dance with. I hear you are quite the charmer."

His silver eyes slid to mine and I raised an eyebrow. "Yes," he said, giving me an amused look before turning back to Mrs. Randolf. "I suppose I can be."

"You'll have to make sure Benny and I get an invite, of course. I love seeing all the beautiful dresses."

"I'll make sure to mention it to my parents," Draco replied and then Mrs. Randolf turned back to me, taking a few coins from her wallet.

"Thank you, Ginny," she said as she took her ticket and placed the tip on the counter. "You're always so pleasant."

"I try," I muttered under my breath because I knew she doesn't really think that.

She looked at me and then she looked at Draco… and then back at me. "Ginny, you're so pretty." God, she was going to do that again. "Draco, don't you think Ginny is pretty?"

"I think she is very pretty," he answered and when he looked at me, he winked. I sighed loudly and started to rearrange things under the desk so they would go away and stop talking about it.

"You know, I'm always telling Benny that they need prettier faces in the restaurant." She looked back at me and I gave her an uncomfortable smile. "I think Ginny would be a perfect waitress."

"Mrs. Randolf, I like my job," I lied because it was embarrassing that was she saying all of that to Draco.

"Nonsense," she said, batting my words away and I looked down and shook my head. "I you're your grandfather owns half of this place. Perhaps you could have a word with the powers that be and help Ginny here out."

"It's really not necessary…"

"What do you say?" she cut me off and Draco gave her a fake smile.

"Of course."

"See," Mrs. Randolf turned to me again and winked. "Malfoy's get things done. See you in a few."

"Bye," I mumbled as she left and I put the coins in my pocket while she disappeared down the hallway. I exhaled slowly once she was gone and shook my head again as Draco resumed his spot right in front of me.

"Do you want to be a waitress?" he asked curiously as I busied myself with pretending to clean.

"Not really… well…" I stopped and looked at him. Could he really get me to the restaurant? "I mean, I wouldn't mind it. The waitresses make more money," I admitted as I thought of the writing retreat. I stared at him for a few moments before deciding that I was going to tell him more about myself. "There's a writing retreat I'm saving up for," I told him and he tilted his head curiously. "It's next summer and it's really expensive… I've been saving up for it for a while now."

"You want to be a writer?" he asked and I nodded shyly.

"Kind of," I answered in a small voice because even though it's something I want more than anything in the world, it's also my main insecurity because I want it too much.

"What do you write about?" he asked, leaning over the counter again. "Is that what you're doing in that notebook of yours?"

"I write about everything, I guess. I like writing stories…"

"Can I read one?"

"No," I said quickly and he raised an eyebrow. "None of them are finished or anything," I lied as I tugged on my dress. "Anyways," I said to change the subject. "You don't have to do anything to get me into the restaurant, you know. Mrs. Randolf says that every time she sees me."

"I kind of like having you back here to myself," he mused as he looked around the empty hallway. My cheeks heated up. "Do you want to work there instead?" he questioned and I shrugged my shoulders.

"I don't mind working back here."

"But do you _want_ to work there?" he asked seriously and I glanced at him.

"There aren't any open spaces. Del said she would transfer me if there was… but there aren't…"

"Ginny, do you _want_ it?" He asked, cutting me off and I looked down as I played with my fingers. "I can speak to someone for you."

"No," I said with a head shake. "I don't want anyone to lose their spot."

"If you're sure…" He eyed me critically and I nodded my head to reassure him. After a few moments he checked his watch again and then he licked his perfect teeth. "I have to head back," he said seriously, turning back to me and reaching into his pocket. "Pansy is going to get you after your shift to go shopping," he said and I frowned.

"What?" I didn't know anything about it and I thought it was odd that it was him that was telling me.

"Don't let her run you into the ground, though," he said, handing me a silver card that had his name on it. "I know she can be tedious at times."

"What is this?"I asked as I looked at the plastic card he handed me. When I saw the vault number in the corner I nearly dropped it. "Draco, this is your bank card," I hissed at him like he didn't know and I tried to hand it back, only he wouldn't take it. "You can't just give this to anyone."

There wasn't much money in my bank account by most people's standards so if I was ever mugged, the robber wouldn't get much out of me. I couldn't even imagine the damage someone could do with a Malfoy Gringgots card.

"Give it to Pansy," he said as he looked over my face. "I won't be able to see her before I go. Could you do that for me?"

I looked down at the card and then back to him. "Why are you giving her your bank card?" I asked softly and he smirked.

"Don't lose that," he said, nodding to the card as he buttoned up his jacket. "I would hate to have to cancel it. I've grown quite attached to it."

"I won't lose it," I assured him and he winked at me before walking off.

I held onto his card like it was pure gold for the rest of the day until Pansy came to drag me along for a 'shopping trip.' I soon found out why Draco had given me that card. He wanted Pansy to buy all of my things for me, but my pride wouldn't allow it. Pansy told me a list of the designated things I had to buy… things every girl should have in their wardrobe.

A modest, but still sexy swim suit with a teasing cover up.

A sleek well fitted dress for the theatre or dinner dates

A pair of red high heel pumps.

Silver hoop earrings

A good fitting pair of jeans

I couldn't buy all of those things, especially not at the stores Pansy was taking me too, but I refused to use Draco's card.

"He wants to buy things for you," Pansy said with an eye roll after I gave in and bought myself my swim suit after an hour long debate with myself on whether I actually needed it. "I don't understand why you won't take advantage."

"I have money," I stated bitterly as the sales person put my purchases in the bag. I reasoned with myself that I did need some new clothes before the school year started so I would have something to wear on the weekends. By that time I had three bags full of clothes. I told myself I could always ask Del for more hours to make up for it and I made sure that everything I bought was on sale. "I don't need charity."

"He didn't mean to offend you," she said with a head shake as we walked out of the store. "He just wanted to be nice."

"Throwing money at me isn't nice," I hissed as she dragged me into a shoe store.

"If throwing money at someone isn't nice, then I don't know what is," she said with a laugh. I shook my head and walked to the other side of the store to get away from her. "Ginny, you're being ridiculous. This is how he does things. He knew most of things that we would be buying today would be for his benefit."

"What do you mean?" I asked carefully, keeping enough space between us so that she got the hint that I was still annoyed.

"Well, the dress is a date dress," she said, nodding to the bag that had the black dress I was peer pressured into buying and the very same one I was determined to return the next day because it was way too much money for me… but I still refused Draco's card. "So when he takes you somewhere nice you have something more than a sundress."

My ears started burning and I turned my head away because I was embarrassed that she noticed that those were the only dress up clothes I had.

"We got the swim suit for boating on the lake and the red shoes," she says as she picks up a red heel that was dangerously high. "Just look good."

I grabbed the shoes and looked at the price. "I'm not getting those," I said, going to walk right out of the store so I wouldn't spend anymore of my savings, but I stopped when I saw the silver sandals. I _needed _them.

I left with a dent in my bank account and a few unneeded articles of clothing, but I had my pride still intact. I left Draco's card with Pansy that night before heading home to my parents and trying on everything that I had gotten. It felt nice to have new things and that buyer's remorse that was starting to eat away at me soon vanished. That night my parents sat me down and had a long talk with me about going places without telling them and without a 'grown up' present because the world was dangerous and my brother was missing.

So I was virtually grounded for no reason. That's why I'm crawling out the window in my new dress and shimming down the drain pipe like a circus entertainer. I run to the shed, trying not to call too much attention to myself and I wheel out my bike. That was another thing that got me on house arrest. A house elf had wheeled the bike to my house with my sandals stuck in the basket and my parents refused to budge until I told them whose elf it was.

I lied and said it belonged to Pansy.

When they asked me who Pansy was… I told them it was someone I worked with.

I told them so many lies that I still feel a little bit bad about it…. But not enough to stop what I'm doing.

When I wheel out my bike, I tip toe it along until I reach the gate and I send a cautious look back to the house before taking off down the road. Freedom. It feels good and I smile to myself as I bike my way towards Draco's house. I guess a part of me does feel guilty about sneaking out because I have made a few rules when hanging out with him.

I've decided that I can't hang out with him one on one anymore. Not just yet anyways because I can't trust myself around him. I've already snogged him silly when I barely knew him and I'm afraid I'd do something I'd regret if I let myself get…seduced… by him. Seduced is a good word because that's exactly what he's doing to me. The way that he speaks, the way he moves… the way he kisses me…

I need to stop thinking about it.

I shake my head and keep going until I reach that really large and really intimidating looking gate. I slip off of the bike and wheel it towards the little speaker box, pushing the button and waiting for it to beep back.

"Malfoy residence," the same raspy voice that's always there answers and I smile a little. I think I should learn his or her name sometime.

"Hey," I say in greeting. "It's Ginny. I'm here to see Draco."

The gate creeps open and I wheel my bike inside. The elf greets me before I can reach the fountain to put my bike down and I raise my eyebrows as it approaches.

"The master is down by the lake," it says in a tired voice as it comes closer and it puts his hands on my handle bars. "Linny will put the bike in the garage."

"Oh," I say softly. "Okay. Thank you, Linny," I say as I let it take the bike away from me. It starts heading down the path towards that large garage, and I make a face. It looks really odd because the elf is so small and my bike is a lot bigger. "Do you need any help?" I ask as I take a few steps towards him/it/she… I'm not sure what gender the elf is, actually.

Linny the elf looks over its shoulder for a surprised moment before shaking it's ancient head and trudging towards the garage again.

"Alright then," I say as I turn to the left to take the opposite path towards the lake. I try to keep myself from running down the concrete stairs. I've become that pitiful. I've seen him five times since my birthday and each time I find myself getting more and more anxious to see him again.

I think I like him more than I liked Harry.

That's getting into dangerous territory.

I don't see him right away when I reach the boat house and I get all the way to the dock before squinting my eyes and catching him in the water. Draco is a swimmer. He told me that it's his preferred sport, but his father made him stop doing it in a league so he could focus on Quidditch. He said that when he wakes up in the morning, before he does anything, he goes for a swim to clear his head for the day. It would explain the amazing body he has. Draco has the body of a swimmer, long and lean with broad shoulders and a narrow waist. I slip off my sandals and sit on the end of the wooden dock to watch him as I put my feet in the water. It's another humid day and the lake feels cool against my skin.

He reaches an orange floatey thing in the middle of the lake and then he pauses a second to catch his breath. I see him stop and put his arm on the orange thing to keep him afloat as he shakes some water from his hair. I wonder what he thinks about when he swims. I wonder if he thinks about me…. He turns his head towards the dock and I bring my hand up to block the sun from my eyes. He's far enough away where I'm not sure if he can see me or not, but I suspect he does because he starts swimming towards me.

I smile as the water ripples around him while he swims. I don't know if what he's doing called is a breast stroke or a…something else, but he's doing it efficiently. He's like a shark in the water and once he reaches me, he stops and flicks water from his face as he looks up at me.

I want him to be my boyfriend.

I shake my head again to rid it of that thought. It's too soon and he's still Draco Malfoy. A part of me is still hesitant about that.

"Hey," I say with a little smile as he inhales deeply.

"Hey," he repeats as he grabs my ankles. I panic for a moment, thinking he's going to pull me in, but I relax when I realize he won't.

"How was the swim?" I ask because I don't know what else to say about it as he puts one hand on the dock by my leg to keep himself up. He runs his other hand up and down my calf. I'm pleased I decided to shave my legs this morning.

"Invigorating," he says with a smirk. "Do you want to join me?" he asks with a devilish smile.

"I didn't bring my swim suit," I reply and he looks at me with darkened eyes.

"I don't mind."

Yeah… no.

I gulp and look behind me as I cross my arms nervously. "Where is Pansy?" I ask as I glance around so I can avoid looking at him.

"I suspect her and Blaise will be here shortly," he says in a deep voice and then I feel him kiss my knee. Seduction. It's like all he can do and it makes my stomach turn wonderfully every time he touches me like that. "Come into the water," he says as he swims back a little bit, pushing off the dock. When he swims on his back I can see his abs and I look away quickly. "It feels nice."

"I'd rather not," I admit as I look down at the water.

"What are you afraid of?" he asks, back at my side again. "I won't let you drown if that's your worry. We have extra suits inside."

"I…" I look at him again as he stares curiously up at me. I wish I could be more daring like a girl he'd date, but I just can't be someone I'm not right now. I want to tell him things about myself so he can get to know me better, and I guess this is something I can tell him. "I can't swim," I admit and he smiles a little.

"Like I said," he says dryly. "I won't let you drown. I can teach you to swim."

"It's not so much that I can't swim," I mutter uncomfortably. "I just… I don't like it when I can't touch the bottom… or see the bottom," I add as look at the green water again. "It makes me freak out."

"Really?" he says with an eyebrow arched and he comes back to the dock and he pushes himself up so he's sitting beside me.

"Yeah," I say like it was no big deal. "I was fishing with my Dad when I was little once and I fell into the water… I've kind of panicked in deep water ever since." I say in an embarrassed voice, thinking he'll find me silly.

"Then we'll just have to stick to the shallow end, now won't we?" he says and when I look at him he smirks again and leans in. "We wouldn't want you to have a heart attack or anything," he whispers against my lips and I laugh a little before letting him kiss me. "You taste like toothpaste," he says when he pulls back a little.

I smile as his hand comes up to my neck. "I brushed my teeth before I came."

"How thoughtful," he whispers before pressing his lips to mine again.

"You're all wet," I point out because he's still dripping and each time we kiss the water from his hair falls down on me.

"If you just give me a moment we can get you in that state as well," he says as he pushes me back so I'm lying on my back. He says some of the dirtiest things but I can't help but laugh at it.

We start kissing again and I stop his hand when it starts creeping up my thigh. He takes it smoothly and moves it to my waist, only to bring it up to the buttons down the front of my dress as his kisses move to my neck.

"Draco," I whisper in warning as he starts to pop the buttons through the holes. I always have to stop his hands from doing things. That's another reason why I don't want to be alone with him for any length of time because I know eventually I'll give in. Damn my hormones. "Draco…" That didn't sound as worried… it almost sounded like a moan and that was embarrassing.

"You don't trust my hands," he whispers against my neck as he continues to unbutton my shirt dress until my pink bra is revealed. "Tell me stop," he says as he moves back to my lips.

His kisses are intoxicating and when I bring my hand up to remove his hand again I find myself just rubbing his arm… then I sigh when he sucks on my lower lip.

Oh, to hell with it.

I bring my hand up to his hair and thread my fingers through it as his fingers skim the outline of my bra. I know this whole thing is moving way too fast. Way too fast and way too soon but it just feels so good and he tastes like candy. I love the way his tongue moves against mine. It's not too messy like Michael's or too hesitant like Dean's… his kisses are just perfect.

"Do you want me to stop?" he asks as I run my fingers through his hair again, messing it all up. I don't say anything as I tilt my neck up to kiss the corner of his mouth. His hand starts sliding under my bra and my breathing becomes heavy. I feel hot and cold at the same time and my body starts to shiver. "Do you want me to stop?" he asks again, a little firmer as he brings his lips to my ear. He sucks on my ear lobe and my whole body tightens. "Answer me, Ginny."

More tingles go through me because of the way he says my name. I shake my head after a few moments and he kisses my cheek, putting the rest of his hand under the cup of my bra and actually squeezing me… there… I arch my back, not really sure why. It just feels right.

"No," I whisper against his lips. "I don't want you to…"

"Ginny? Draco?"That's Pansy's voice and I snap back quickly and blush as I sit up and try to right my clothes. Draco cusses and lies back with his eyes clenched shut. I work quickly to button my dress up properly and I let my hair fall in front of my face like a curtain. "Where are you guys?"

"We're down here," I say after I find my voice and I stand up as her and Blaise walk around the boat house. Draco sits up as well and grabs his towel, drying off his body and hair as they approach.

"Perfect timing as always," Draco sneers sarcastically and I glance at him before nervously tucking hair behind my ear. "How's it going?" he asks and Blaise smirks when he looks at me. Then his eyes slide to my chest.

"Not as good as you apparently."

"You missed a button," Pansy whispers as she comes towards me and loops her arm through mine. I look down and quickly button the missing button with a crimson blush on my cheeks. "What were you two doing?" she asks as she wiggles her eyebrows.

"Just talking," I lie quickly and she laughs as she starts steering me towards the boat house.

"Let's get everything ready. You know the boys are useless."

"I heard that," Blaise says lazily and Pansy smiles at me as we walk towards the boat house while Draco mutters something about changing clothes.

"Blaise has been in a terrible mood all morning," Pansy says as we approach the house and I give her a look because I didn't even notice. "So ignore him if he's being odd today."

He's always odd to me. I don't tell her that, of course. "Why is he in a bad mood?" I question as we step inside and head towards the kitchen. The boat house is set up like a small town house and below is where the boating equipment is. It's bigger than my home, of course, and that's a source of embarrassment and envy.

"He found out that his Mom is re-marrying again," she says with sigh, like it was only a mild irritation to her. I go towards the counter and watch as Pansy goes to the fridge to take out the food. I guess we're having some kind of a cook out before the party. I'm glad, though because my stomach is starting to growl. That was another lie I told my mother. I didn't eat lunch. "She married some Greek heir who's two times her age."

"Oh, why would he be so mad about that?" I ask and then she looks at me like I grew another head. "I mean, if his mother loves that Greek guy… wouldn't he be happy that she's happy?"

"Uh, no," she says like I was stupid as she takes condiments out and places them on the counter. "Blaise's father died when he was very young and he hates his mom. Every time she remarries she forces him to go on a bonding weekend with his new step father. They always turn out terrible if you can imagine. They're always old and boring, only marrying his mother because she's young and interesting."

"Does she love him?" I ask and Pansy looks at me like I was silly again as she pulls out a few beers and butterbeers, placing them in a wicker basket she pulled out from under the sink.

"No, she has a shopping addiction to feed," she says dismissively. "Will you grab some plates and silverware please," she says and I nod my head, figuring it's the end of the conversation.

I go and fetch the things she asked for from the far cabinets and when I come back, all the food and drinks are in the basket. "Who all is coming tonight?" I ask as she grabs a few containers and a table cloth from one of the drawers.

"The usual people," she says with a shoulder shrug. "And maybe some more. When Drake has people over, it can get out of hand."

Drake?

I look around the boat house, and from the back window I can see the main house in all its white and green glory. "Where are Draco's parents?" I ask seriously and she glances at me.

"They're on holiday," she says dismissively like it was common knowledge.

"Are they ever coming back?" I question. "I mean, they just leave him alone like this? When my parents go on holiday, they usually take us." Not that we ever go anywhere very often.

"They always do," she says with a shrug as she picks up the basket. It looks heavy so I pick up the other side. "I wish my father would leave me alone some time. It would be nice."

"My parents never leave," I mutter as I help her carry it outside where Draco and Blaise are setting a fire in a large silver grill that looks like it's never been used. "What time is everyone coming?" I ask as Pansy starts pulling out the food. When she takes out the hamburger meat, she hands it to Blaise who smirks and pinches her bottom when she turns around.

"In a couple hours," Draco answers me with a shrug of his shoulder as he turns dials on the grill. I have no idea what for and he doesn't seem to know much about it either.

I notice he did change clothes. He's wearing a black and white stripped t-shirt that fits him well and tan slacks that are rolled up at the bottom to reveal taupe colored boat shoes. He looks like a model from a magazine and when he puts on his sunglasses and tosses his hair casually as he reads some kind of manual for the grill, I find myself being very uncomfortable just looking at him because all I want to do is kiss him again.

"Will you hand me a drink please?" Blaise says and I shake my head and look at him as he raises his eyebrows. Oh, I guess he is talking to me. I wonder if he said anything before that I missed. "Hello?" he adds when I don't say thing right away and I blush.

"Oh, yeah," I say awkwardly as I go to the basket. "What would you like? Regular beer or butterbeer?"

"What do you think?" he asked with a smirk and I grab the regular beer and I hand him one.

"Thank you," he says sarcastically, giving me a surveying look before walking back towards Draco.

I feel a little useless, so I start taking things out of the basket. I place the hamburger buns, some kind of salad, plates, forks, and napkins on one of the wooden picnic tables that's by the shore. It's so hot and I'm starting to sweat so I take a butterbeer from the basket. It's cold and condensation is starting to bead on the bottle, so I put it up to my forehead and close my eyes for a moment with a sigh to cool myself down. When I open then again, I find Draco staring at me. I put the bottle down quickly and he smiles behind his sunglasses before turning back to the grill.

It took a while to get it to work properly. There was a lot of frustrated cussing on Draco's end and Blaise actually ended up kicking it before they got it to do what they wanted it to do. They burnt most of the hamburgers, but I was so hungry, I didn't mind. It was one of the best meals I've had all summer. Maybe it was because I was hungry… or maybe it was because I never thought I'd see Draco cook anything… but it was good and I found the conversation was pleasant as well.

"…. So, he's walking down the hallway," Blaise has been telling this story for the past ten minutes and I take a drink from my bottle to wash down the salad as he lights a cigarette with his wand. "And then he just wipes out," he says, making a hand motion to replicate how it looked. Pansy laughs and Draco smirks. I have no idea who they're talking about, so I smile politely. "And you know Dex, he just sat on his ass for like five minutes before getting up and acting like nothing happened. I mean, I have never seen anyone fall like that. I swear to god I saw his feet fly above his head."

"Who decided he was a good idea," Pansy says as I wipe my mouth with my napkin. "Jeez."

"I would have liked to see that," Draco says with a smile as Pansy fans smoke away from her face with a scowl.

"Could you not smoke while we're eating," she snaps at Blaise as he taps his ashes to the ground. "That's disgusting. Not all of us want lung cancer."

"We're all going to die somehow," he says, but he throws his cigarette on the floor none the less. "Isn't that right, Ginny?"I nearly choke on my sandwich because I wasn't expecting to be involved in the conversation just now. "So, how do you like working at Folk Hills?" he asks and I glance at him before looking back down at my plate. "What do you do all day in that weird little closet?"

"Stop antagonizing," Draco says dryly as he pushes his sunglasses to the top of his head, revealing his eyes.

"It's an innocent question," Blaise answers with his hand up. "Do you really just stand there and put things in a locker? Is that all there is to it?"

"Pretty much," I answer honestly. "The money isn't bad, considering what it is," I admit and Pansy purses her lips.

"How much do you make?" She asks and Draco shoots her a look.

"Stop being tactless," Draco says and then he glances at me. "Don't answer that question, Ginny. It's impolite to talk about money while eating."

"Oh," is all I say like an idiot.

"Do you like working there?" Pansy continues Blaise's line of questions and I shrug.

"Do you like working with Nadia the slag?" Blaise adds and I make a face at the name.

"Why did you call her a slag?" I snap as I narrow my eyes. I don't even like Nadia that much, but I didn't think it was fair that he should say such a thing being who he is and all.

"Because she's a slag," Blaise says and he looks at Draco for support.

"She kind of is," Draco answers when he looks at me. "You have to know what she does half the time."

"What do you mean?" I ask with my brows furrowed and Pansy starts laughing into her napkin like she was in on a big joke.

"Obviously Nadia doesn't just sit around, checking bags and cloaks all day," Blaise says with an amused smile.

"What are you talking about?" I ask, upset that I seem to be out of their little secret joke. I look at Draco for help and he raises his eyebrows like he thought I was joking.

"You don't know about her 'special service'?" Draco says, like I should know such things. I remember some guy mentioning it to her one time, but I didn't know what it meant. "Ginny…" he trails off and shakes his head like I was doing something adorable. "She makes all her tips by…you know," he says raising his eyebrows. I let my frown get even deeper. "She 'services' people who pay her."

I look at Blaise, he pretends to be sticking something in his mouth like a… oh, like a blow job. Oh, disgusting….

"Prostitution is illegal," I say because I can't think of anything else and they all laugh as I cross my arms. "Are you sure that's true?" I ask as I lean across the table again. "I mean, she has kids." That wasn't a very good argument, but I couldn't think of anything else.

"Oh, it's true," Blaise says with a laugh as he finishes off his drink. "Ask anyone."

"Have you…" I look at Draco and he shakes his head, but then he sends a sly look to Blaise. "Blaise, you've done stuff with her?" I ask in horror and then I look at Pansy who's giving him a nasty look.

"What?" he says in defense. "It was only one time and it cost me a couple gallons. It was hardly worth it."

I look down, troubled by this information. "I didn't know she was a slag," I say to myself and they laugh again. "No wonder she makes more money than me."

"Ginny, you're so cute," Pansy says as she squeezes my shoulder. I look at her and find a bit of humor in the situation as well and I smile a little.

I try not to be distracted by the information I learned about Nadia while I finish off the rest of my plate, listening closely the conversation the other three seem to be having. They were intellectuals, that much was clear. They talked about literature and current events and Draco was very keen to bring up political things he had learned from his internship at the Ministry. I found myself very impressed with them, even if Blaise made a few sex references every now and then. I used to think all this group talked about was clothes, money, and hating everyone that lacked the first two.

I was proved wrong and I was pleased.

"People are going to start showing up soon," Pansy pointed out as she stood. "We should head inside."

We all get up, and just out of habit, I start gathering the plates and napkins until I feel a hand on my arm. I look up, realizing the sun is starting to set as Draco stares down at me. "No," he says with a head shake. "Leave them."

"But what if animals…" I trail off and look at the leftover food just waiting to attract unpleasant things.

"You're my guest, Ginny," he says, gently pulling me away from the table and towards the main house. Blaise and Pansy are already a good deal a head of us and I feel Draco's thumb hook in the belt around my waist. "And we have house elves for a reason."

I blush, but don't say anything. I don't know if he just assumed everyone has house-elves, but I don't want him thinking any less of my family.

When we get inside, Pansy is already at the bar, pouring herself a shot. "Draco, can Ginny take some shots with me?" she asks as she fills another small glass. This back room is huge and it's attached to a large patio that has a hammock attached to it.

I frown and look at Draco, not because I'm waiting for his answer, of course. I just don't understand stand why she asked him permission and not me. It's not like he owns me and decides my actions.

"I want you to have a good time," Draco says as he glances down at me. "You'll be meeting a lot of my friends tonight so I want you to be comfortable… but don't get too comfortable," he says, giving me a stern look that makes me want to look away. "Don't get sloppy."

I make a face, still a little annoyed that she asked him in the first place. "I think I will," I tell him, ignoring his little speech as I walk over to Pansy.

After two terrible tasting shots, people start showing up and Draco pulls me away from Pansy and the bar to introduce me to a few of them. I recognize most of the last names, actually. Brenda Libowitz's Dad owns a majority of the sports stadiums around the world. Spencer Mallory's great great great Grandfather invented the moving photograph and Misha Sullivan's family owns a lot of hotels. It was intimidating, and I was glad that I had taken the shots and that Draco had handed me a mixed drink as he brought me around to meet more people. I met a boy from Nigeria whose grandfather was the Minister of Magic in the eighties and I met a group of girls from the French school of magic who were heiresses to a large fortunes. I had to wonder if one of them knew Draco's old girlfriend.

I didn't dare ask of course as I sipped on my drink and let Draco steer me around with his hand around my waist. My face was becoming flushed with alcohol and I was finding myself talking more and more with everyone, but I still strained to be polite and respectful. I wanted Draco to be impressed with my conversation as well.

"You've done well," Draco whispered against my hair as we walked into the kitchen, where Daphne and Pansy were deep in discussion with Pansy's younger sister Ivy. "Thank you."

Weird. "I'm glad I can live up to your standards," I tell him with an eyebrow raised as he smirks down at me.

"Good," is all he says before he kisses my cheek. I close my eyes and smile. "I'm going to leave you in here with the girls. I'll be in the living room if you need me."

"Okay," I say slowly and then I watch him walk off. When I turn back they're all staring at me. "Hi." I say like a loser and Ivy raises her brow and then she walks past me.

"Don't mind her," Daphne says as she walks towards me and takes my arm. "She's a bitchy drunk." She says and then she grins at me. "Let's get a few more drinks in you and you can tell me all about your shopping trip with Pans, yeah?"

We go back to the bar and the next time I look up after a few more drinks I find the house crowded with people I had never seen before. The place was packed with people drinking, smoking, and taking pills and I blinked a few times to make sure it was real before letting myself get pulled around. I'm not sure how it happened, but I started playing some kind of card game with Vincent Crabbe and Gregory Goyle of all people, in Draco's little breakfast nook. I found them to be quite funny actually. Stupid, but funny, and every time it was their turn to take a drink they burped like cave men. For some reason they reminded me of Ron. That thought made me laugh.

"Are you having fun?" Someone whispered against my ear and I tilted my neck up and smiled at Draco as I held my cards towards my chest.

"I'm winning," I gloated and he smirked as he kissed my cheek.

"Of course you are," he says as he bent down so his face was up against mine and his hands were on either side of me on the table. "Goyle and Crabbe here aren't the sharpest tools in the box," he says. I laugh, but Crabbe and Goyle don't try to deny it. "Are you almost finished?" he asks against my neck as I hold out my cards so I can make my next move. "I want your company."

"Not until I win," I sing as I lay down two cards. Vincent groans and I smirk as he picks up his pint to finish it off. I like winning things, I've decided. Draco doesn't move for a while and I glance towards him again as Goyle makes his move. "Are you going to stand there the whole time?" I ask because he's all up in my personal space and he gives me a look like he was irritated that I would ask such a thing.

"You're done playing," he says as he takes my cards and lies them face up on the table.

"Hey!" I snap as I stand up. "I was going to win."

"Come and sit with me," he says, trying not to strain his voice as I glare down at the cards. I look over at Crabbe and Goyle who are looking at me with raised eyebrows. Well, it's not like I wanted to hang out with them that bad any ways.

"Alright," I say with a sigh. "Since you asked nicely," I add sarcastically.

I have no idea why he wanted me to sit beside him to be honest. He was talking to some kid who had a goatee and they were talking about some bill at the ministry. I was board and I just kept drinking the mixed drink Pansy gave me as Draco put his hand between my knees. He spoke like I wasn't even there and every time I tried to enter the conversation I was either ignored or my comment was brushed aside. I tried to follow the conversation, I really did, but I gave up trying to understand and instead decided to stare at Draco instead. I was drunk, so I didn't mind blatantly checking him out.

I liked his nose, it was so perfect looking and straight and I wanted to touch it, but I stopped myself because that would have been weird. Instead I brought my hand up to run through his hair. He glanced at me in surprise as I ran my fingers through the soft hairs at the back of his neck and I smiled at him. He gave me a suspicious look before squeezing my thigh and turning back to his friend.

The just keep on talking about boring things that I didn't know about and I got really restless just sitting there. So restless in fact, that I started to fidget and Draco gave me a sharp look when I slouched back into the seat with my arms crossed. It didn't last long, though, he went back to his discussion and I went back to looking at him. I liked his hair as well. He has a very nice hair cut… its short like most modern boy haircuts, but its longer on the top and styled differently in a careless but controlled way. I wonder who does his hair because it seems like a professional must to do it each day. I like the color as well… it's such a soft white blond that I could barely believe that it was his real color.

"Is that your real hair color?" I blurt out my inquiry and his friend stops talking as they both stare at me with raised eyebrows. I'm pretty drunk, so I don't even care. "I mean, your eyebrows are darker," I say in defense and the goatee kid smiles.

"Yeah, Malfoy," he smirks maliciously as I sit forward. "Does the carpet match the drapes?"

"Luckily for you, Ginny," Draco says as he leans in closer to me so forehead is almost touching my own, not even bothering to acknowledge his friend's comment. "You are in a prime position to find out," he says with a smirk before turning back his friend and steering the conversation back to politics. It took me a few delayed moments to figure out what he meant by that and then I made a face.

"Ew," is all I say before going to stand up so I can go talk to someone else. His hand tightens on my thigh, holding me in place.

"Stay," is all he says and I make another angry face because I am not a dog that can be commanded like that but I forget all about my anger as I take a few more drinks from my glass.

I take his hand and place my hand against his as he speaks, noticing how much larger his is than mine. There's something to that, I think. He has beautiful fingers as well and when I look at his fingernails… really _look _at them… I realize that they're in better shape than my own. I quickly hide my hands and make a deal with myself to stop biting my nails and to start taking better care of them. With a bored sigh I look towards the other room only to see people dancing to the music that's blaring through the house. I spot Daphne and Pansy in the group and I smile as I see them all dancing.

"I know this song," I say in excitement as I sit up on my knees. Draco looks at me as I put my arm across his shoulders."Oh, I want to go dance," I say and then I turn to him as I climb off the couch. "I'm going to go dance."

I don't wait for him to reply and he doesn't try to stop me this time as I put my drink down and I nearly run towards the dancing group. "Hey!" I yell at Pansy as I start to dance my way towards them. My dancing consists of a lot of jumping up and down and few hip movements but it feels good right now.

"Ginny!" Pansy's a little drunk as well and she puts her arms around my neck, giving me a hug. "I'm going to do it tonight." She yells against my ear as we dance.

"What do you mean?" I ask with a laugh as she continues to hold onto me.

"Blaise, I'm going to finally ask him to be official with me," she says, pulling back and giving me a girlish smile. "I think he'll say yes this time."

"This time?" I say with a snort. My drunk mind not realizing I need to be sympathetic right now. "Do you think now is a good time?" I ask. I glance towards Blaise. He's dancing with some Latin girl in a pink dress. "I mean, he's dancing with that girl and all."

Pansy's head snap likes a snake and then she narrows her eyes at the dancing couple before turning back to me, plastering a fake smile like she could care less. "We have an open relationship," she admits and I make a face as I jump to the music, running my hand through my hair and messing it up because I like the way it feels. "But… after tonight it will be different," she says and I look at her as she sends a nasty look towards the dancing couple before turning back to me. "That doesn't mean we can't have fun right now," she says spitefully.

Three more shots and a rum and coke later I was dancing with everyone like a fiend. After a while, I opened my eyes to see Pansy dancing all up on some tall guy in a yellow shirt. That's not Blaise and I blink a few times before continuing to dance against someone, someone who smells like smoke and sweat. I was having a good time until I felt my arm being tugged on, pulling me away from the crowd. It was Draco, of course, glaring down at me with silver eyes. I'm out of breath and sweating from all the dancing and I run my fingers through my bangs. I know they're sticking up now.

"What are you doing?" I ask and he glares at me for a few moments before bringing a hand up to twist in my hair, tugging it back as he places a harsh kiss against my lips.

I don't want to kiss him. I was dancing and I didn't like the rough way he was treating me in front of everyone, so I tried to push him back, but he held me in place firmly, biting my lower lip painfully until I whimpered and he gathered my hands in one of his to keep me in place. I relented and gave in after a few moments, letting him kiss harshly without a fight and I even let myself lean against his body when it started to feel good. When he pulls back he lets go of my hands, but he still has that cold glare in his eyes. I furrow my brow because I didn't understand why he was acting this way towards me.

"Why did you do that?" I ask as I bring my hand up to my lips. It was really hurting right now.

"You have your rules, I have mine," he says hatefully, still holding onto my hair. I bring my hand up to his wrist to deaden the pressure. "You do not dance with other guys like that. Especially not when I'm around" He raises his eyebrow before glancing at Pansy like he was mad at her. "Will you keep her in check, please?" he says hatefully as he lets go of my hair and Pansy looks uncomfortable.

"Excuse me," I say, anger boiling in my veins as I take a step back. "Don't talk about me like that. No one needs to keep me in check," I tell him as I rub my aching scalp. "I'm not a child and you don't get to pull on me like that either," I add, still rubbing out the pain. Jerk.

"You," he hisses as he looks down at me. "Were dancing with every guy here," he says and I open my mouth to protest, but I stop because I think he may have been right. "I was sitting right in there, Ginny. I could see you."

"It was just dancing," I defend myself. I know everyone is watching us now and I glance around quickly with my cheeks heating up. "It was just fun," I add because I wasn't dancing with guys because I wanted to dance with them. I was just dancing and they happened to be there. It wasn't like I was grinding up on them like Pansy was.

"It wasn't fun for me," he says dryly. "I would appreciate it if you wouldn't do it again."

I look at Pansy for some back up, but she's just standing there with her arms crossed and when I make eye contact with her, she looks down.

"It's not like we're official," I mumble. I know that's not what I wanted to say, but I just thought of Pansy and Blasie and how they were dancing with other people. Something dangerous flashes in Draco's eyes then and I almost take a step back to get away from it.

He looks around sharply at the people who have all stopped dancing to watch our exchange and he grabs my arm, pulling me towards the back door. I push his hand off of me when we get outside and I cross my arms, angry that he's just dragging me around like he is.

"That maybe so right now," he says flatly as he slams the back door. It makes me jump. "But do what you want in your own time. Do not embarrass me in front of my friends."

"How am I embarrassing you?" I snap at him. "I was just dancing!"

"You are only here because I want you to be," he says and I look up at him, trying to mask my hurt. "I wanted to spend time with you. I don't want to watch you rubbing up on other guys. How would you feel if the tables were turned?" he asks and I cross my arms. I think of Draco dancing with other girls, especially Cho and jealousy prickles my brain. "Hm?"

"I wouldn't like it," I mutter in defeat and then I glance up at him again. Does he have a point? "You're right," I say after a few moments, deciding that I was in the wrong no matter how barbaric he's acting. "I really didn't realize…. I was just dancing. I've had so much to drink," I admit, bringing my hand up to my forehead.

"Why don't we take a walk for some fresh air," Pansy says as she opens the back door and steps outside where Draco and I are. She takes my arm and I look away, upset with this odd fight Draco and I seem to be having. "Go on the dock to cool off?" she offers and she looks at Draco like she was asking for permission and he nods his head tightly. "Let's go, Gin," she says as she puts her arm around my shoulder and starts steering me towards the concrete stairs.

"Is my lip bleeding?" I ask as we walk into the back yard and Pansy looks at me.

"No, why would it?" she asks as I bring my hand up to my mouth.

"I think he bit me." I look over my shoulder as Draco walks back into the house.

"Oh," she says and then she gives me a smile as she squeezes my shoulder. "You know Draco, just felt the need to claim territory."

"I'm not his territory," I state bitterly. I know I may have been wrong to be dancing with those guys in front of him, but he could have handled that a different way.

She looks at me, but doesn't say anything as we make it down to the water. I sit at the edge of the dock and cross my legs with my shoes still on because I don't want to put my feet into the water when it's so dark outside. Pansy sits beside me with a heavy sigh and I glance at her from the corner of my eyes.

"Are you still going to tell Blaise about being official?" I ask and she shrugs her shoulder.

"I don't know… maybe I should wait until we're both sober."

"I think that would be best," I admit and she looks at me with her head tilted to the side before facing forward again. "You like him a lot," I point out and she shrugs again.

"I guess so… he's so hard to figure out." She says and I frown.

"How so?"

"He's just… I never know what he's thinking. I think his Dad dying messed him up big time because he never lets me in and he can be so mean."

"Like Draco?" I say and she shakes her head.

"No, Draco…. Draco can be cruel, but his cruelty is usually honest. He notices everything and he'll point it out," she says, talking about him like they were old friends. I guess they are. "But Blaise…" she shakes her head. "He just lies, and half the time it's about stupid things. Like the other day he told me he was going to transfer schools but I knew it was a lie because he already bought all of his things for Hogwarts. He said it just to see my reaction."

"That's odd," I say and she nods her head, dipping her toe into the water. "Do you think what Draco did inside… was that… I know he had the right to be upset or jealous or whatever," I say in a timid voice as I stare at my knees. "But is that okay what he did?" I ask cautiously. None of my girlfriends had ever been in relationships and this is a whole other world to me. "He kind of hurt me when he did that," I say as I bring my hand back up to my lip.

"Draco is intense," she admits and I think of what Daphne had said to me at the pub. He's intense… she had said, don't go out of your way to make him jealous. "What he did wasn't so bad. You're new to our group and he probably felt compelled to put it out there that you were with him despite your actions." What is that supposed to mean? "He's just… give it some time, yeah?" she says, looking into my eyes. "He has trust issues."

"Why?" I ask and she makes a face.

"Why do any of us have issues?" she asks as she stands up and dusts off the back of her skirt. "Blame the parents," she says with a smile and I figure it's a joke so I laugh a little as well. "You know, Draco decided to have a cook out earlier because he thought you would like it. None of us have actually done one before. He can be thoughtful sometimes."

"Oh," I whisper. "I didn't even realize…"

"It's okay," she says with a smile. "It was fun…Do you want to go back in? I think Draco is cooled down enough."

"Is that why we came out here… for him to calm down?"

"And you," she says with a smile and then she puts her hands in her pockets. "I meant what I said," she says as we start walking back. I stop and glance at her. "Before… Draco can be a good guy. I know sometimes it's hard to see that… but underneath it all he is good…sometimes."

"I can see it," I say honestly and she nods her head.

"And you know… it wouldn't be bad to let him touch you."

"What?" I ask dryly. That kind of stopped me in my tracks to be honest. "What do you mean?"

"When you're ready," she says quickly to cover her tracks. "Look, I know that you haven't done anything with guys," she says and I make a face. Why is this any of her business? "Draco could teach you a lot if you let him." She says. I don't say anything to that and she sighs. "Was that too much to say?" she adds and I nod my head.

"A little." I confess and she shakes her head.

"Sorry, it's just that I don't want you to get all caught up on who he is instead enjoying being with him, you know? Having a boyfriend is fun. Sex is fun… I just don't want you to limit yourself for any reason."

"I'll keep that in mind," I say slowly and she smiles a little.

"Good," she says and then she walks to me and takes my arm again. "Let's get back inside and pretend like we're not bothered by anything."

"Sounds good."

"Where is she!" I stop walking and blink a few times at the ridiculous screaming from the house. "No, let go. Where is she?"

"Oh, for fucks sake," Pansy sighs and I look up at the house as two figures come stomping down the stairs. I realize halfway down that it's Millicent and Daphne.

Daphne sends a panicked look to Pansy as Millicent sets her eyes on me. It looks like she's been drunk girl crying and she had her glare leveled at me. I let go of Pansy and take a step back as she comes barreling down.

"Back off it, Millie," Daphne scolds as she tries to hold her back. "This is such a bad idea. You'll know what he'll do if you…"

"Oh, shut up," Millicent snaps, pushing Daphne to the side. Daphne falls and makes a whimpering noise. Then she cusses at the taller girl who is getting closer and closer towards me. "I have something to say to you, Ginny Weasley."

She's drunk, I can tell. She's drunk and angry and I clench my fists in fear. I don't want to get into a fight, and especially not with her. She's scrappy.

"Go away, Millicent." Pansy rolls her eyes as Millicent passes her, headed towards me. I take another step back. She's wearing a purple halter dress and she hikes it up when she approaches. "It's not her fault he doesn't want you."

"Shut up you skinny bitch," Millicent says and Pansy looks at me with a smirk.

"At least she said skinny," Pansy jokes and I manage a smile before gulping once Millicent is right in front of me.

Holy hell.

"You have no idea what I've been through!" she yells at me and I furrow my brows, looking to Pansy for help. She looks as worried as I am and she starts inching towards the stairs. "I have done everything!" she screams at me with watery eyes and I flinch.

"What are you talking about?" I ask her and she sneers.

"I did everything I was supposed to. I changed everything," she says. I wonder if she's talking about the charms and surgery she had to make her beautiful. That's the only change I can see. "But I'm still not good enough. What makes you so special?" she hisses and I feel my heart start beating faster. Fear. It's making me shake. "You're just poor and you're not even that pretty."

"Hey," I say, offended and she makes a face as she looks me over. "Don't talk to me like that."

"And to top it off you're the help. The help," she says slowly, like it would sink in for me. "You're supposed to fuck the help behind closed doors. You never make them your girlfriend!" she stomps her foot and wipes her eye, smearing her eye makeup. It makes her look like a clown. I look for Pansy again, but she's nowhere to be seen. Where did she go? I need her help! "I stopped eating chips for this!" she yells at me. I would laugh if it wasn't so scary. "Do you have any idea how hard that is!"

"I don't know what you want me to do," I say calmly, like I was talking to a dog with rabbis. "Maybe we can talk when you're not drunk and shouting at me," I say and then fire ignites in her eyes.

"You know what you can do," she says as she takes a step closer to me. I take another step back and when I realize I'm at the edge of the dock I feel panic shoot through my system. My body is warning me to get the hell out of this situation, but I can't seem to move. Where did Pansy and Daphne go? "You can go away. Just go away!" she screams at me before bringing her hands up and pushing me.

My back smacks against the water and I panic.

I wasn't lying when I told Draco about my fear of deep water. It's too dark, I'm still a little drunk, and I'm panicking. I stay under the water for a few moments, thrashing around and breathing in lake water before surfacing and spitting some water out so I can catch my breath. I really can't swim, so I try to dog paddle my way back to the dock, but I'm in too much shock to do much good and when I feel myself sinking further down my heart beat starts hammering and my muscles tighten. I hear a ringing in my ears…

I just want to go home.

I shouldn't have lied to my parents I shouldn't have snuck out and now I'm going to die in a fucking lake in Draco Malfoy's back yard. Swim or die. I'm pretty sure I'm going to die. I can't breathe. I can't move. I can't do anything and I clench my eyes shut because the water hurts my eyes. I can't even think of anything solid right now… nothing… shapes, sounds, Mom…. Then I feel a hand pulling on my arm, pulling me out of the water. I inhale deeply when I surface again and then I start coughing up the water I swallowed. I don't even care about the disgusting noises I'm making as I try to catch my breath… I just let myself get pulled back towards the dock.

"You're okay," I hear him say. I blink a few times and when we stop I realize it was Draco who had jumped in and saved me. Literally saved me. I was going to die. He pushes hair away from my face and I hug him tightly around the neck as he holds onto the dock to keep us afloat. A swelling of gratitude bursts through me and I even wrap my legs around his body because I don't want him to let me go. "It's okay," he repeats and then he looks up. "Pansy," is all he says as he pushes me forward.

I'm reluctant to let go as Pansy comes running over and she puts her hands down to help pull me out as Draco pushes me from below.

"That was scary," she says seriously, looking shaken up. "You went under. I didn't think you were coming up," she whispers and when I reach the safety of the dock, Daphne runs over to me holding a towel and she wraps it around my shoulders as I sit down. I just need to sit down and I can feel my jaw chattering.

"Oh, Ginny. I'm sorry," she says and I glance back at the water as Draco climbs out. His clothes are soaked and he looks positively livid. "I didn't think she'd actually push you in. Pans and I went to get Draco to make her leave you alone… we didn't know she'd do that."

"I c-can't swim," I say with a chattering jaw and she gives me a sad smile.

"I kind of noticed that," she says and I would have smiled if I wasn't still a little shook up.

"She likes him," I state as I spot Millicent with a gang of girls around her, all trying to fix her makeup.

"She kind of hates him, actually," Daphne whispers as she rubs my arms to keep me warm. "She just wants him." She looks at me and gives me a little smile. "Everyone wants him."

Speaking of 'him', Draco starts walking over to me, his shoes squeaking with each step. I realize he jumped into the water with them on as well and I look down at my own feet in a panic. I'm missing one of my pretty silver sandals. I look out at the water as Draco gets closer to me and I feel like crying again.

"Are you alright?" he asks in a deep voice as he kneels in front of me and Daphne moves away as I nod my head.

"Just a little surprised," I whisper and I glance up at him. He sighs and runs his fingers along my nose and under my eyes. When I realize he's fixing my fudged make up, I blush. "I think one of my shoes is still in the water. I think it fell off," I say quickly, trying not to cry. I just bought them, after all. I'm allowed to be upset about it.

"It was just a joke," I hear Millicent's annoying voice and I make a face as it grates on my ears. I glance up at the house as people start coming out to watch the show. "How was I supposed to know she couldn't swim? What kind of idiot doesn't know how to swim? She's like sixteen or something, isn't she?"

Draco narrows his eyes and then he stands up. I watch as he turns around and starts walking towards Millicent who's standing by the edge of the dock with her arms crossed, trying to defend her actions. "Draco," she says as he approaches with determined steps. Daphne sits beside me and puts her arm around my shoulder as I watch their exchange. "It was just a joke."

"It wasn't funny," he says flatly and she makes an exasperated sound.

"Who doesn't know how to swim?" she says in disbelief and my ears burn in embarrassment again, but it's short lived because Draco pauses for a few moments before bringing his hands up and pushing Millicent in the lake.

I widen my eyes when she splashes against the water.

He said he would never hit a girl but I guess pushing them in a freezing lake is still on the menu.

I don't even mind.

"Fuck, Draco!" she yells once she resurfaces and I stand up so I can see how she's doing. Unfortunately for me she can swim.

"I don't want to see you again until you've thought up an adequate apology," he says coldly. I shiver and it's not because of the water. "While you're in there, I want you to find Ginny's sandal," he says as she starts to pull herself out of the water. He puts his foot on top of her hand to stop her and she looks up at him fearfully… She actually looks afraid and I look back at Draco. His face… that's the cruel way he looks at my brother and Harry when he's fighting with them. "It's silver. Find it and then leave my fucking house."

"Oh my," Daphne whispers and when I look at her I notice even she looks surprised.

"Come on," Draco says when he gets closer to me. He grabs my hand and pulls me up. I don't protest as he pulls me towards the house and I glance over my shoulder once to see Millicent's shocked face.

I smile at her.

And it felt good.

"You're shivering," he says as we walk up the stairs.

I nod my head but don't say anything. When we get to the back door, I see Blaise leaning against the house with a cigarette in his hand. He winks at me as Draco walks past him. "The party's over," Draco says flatly and Blaise throws his cigarette on the ground.

"Yes, General," Blaise says with mock salute as we head towards the stairs.

I let myself get led like a child until we reach a bedroom and I hear the music get turned off and I hear people leaving. I figure this is Draco's bedroom and I look around me as I he disappears into the closet. His room is large, with white walls and large windows. It's clean looking and bright, unlike what I imagined his room to be. I expected something dark and old looking.

"One of my t-shirts should be fine," he says as I cross my arms. When he walks out of the closet, he's only wearing a pair of sleep pants that rest low on his hips. I look away quickly at his bed… it's large with a white down comforter and a modern looking leather headboard. "It will fit you like a dress anyways and I'll pull some pants from my mother's closet."

"Alright," I say as I take the shirt. It's red and it has a pocket on the right chest. I look around for a few moments until I find a bathroom. I walk towards it, stopping only when I realize something. "Can't you dry my clothes with magic or something?"

"You were in lake water," he says with a head shake as he turns down his covers. "They need to be washed."

"Oh," is all I say before disappearing into the bathroom. I peal out of my wet clothes and even my wet knickers and I slide on his shirt. It smells like him and it's the softest cotton I've ever felt before. There's only one problem… I don't have any knickers to put on.

"Draco?" I say softly through the door way.

"What is it?"

"Do you have those pants?"

He hands me a pair of tight yoga pants when I crack open the door and I put them on quickly. They're almost too small and l hold up the shirt and turn around so I can look at my bum in the mirror. Yeah, way too tight. "How long will it take to wash and dry my clothes?" I ask curiously. "Because I have to be home before it gets too late," I say as I walk out of the bathroom, trying to tug down the shirt so it doesn't reveal too much.

"It will only take half an hour. You look tired," he says as he brings a hand up to my face. I lean into it and realize I want to be held so I give in and wrap my arms around his waist, pulling him for a hug as I put my head on his shoulder. "Being in the water really frightened you."

"I told you it would," I say seriously and he kisses the top of my head. "Thanks for saving me, though."

"Let's lay down for a bit," he says as he leads me towards his bed.

I know I shouldn't. I know I should just go home now in wet clothes and dry them by myself… but I look at Draco again.

"I won't touch you anywhere I shouldn't," he says with his hands up in defense and I smile as I crawl under his covers. "Unless you want me to," he adds with a smirk and I snort before turning on my side and tucking my hands under his pillow. It feels nice to lay down and I close my eyes when he turns out the lights.

"I can't believe you pushed her in."

"I wonder if she enjoys it half as much when the joke is placed on her," he says as he scoots closer to me, spooning around with his arm tucked over my waist. I smile and let myself get comfortable as he kisses my neck.

"She likes you," I point out and he makes a noise. "I mean, Daphne says she hated you, but she wants to be with you. That's why she had all that work done."

"Do you remember what she looked like before?" He asks as he moves his lips to my jaw. "I can't show my future children that. They'd be horrified." I frown. That was an odd thing to say and I shake my head to get rid of the weird feeling. "Unfortunately magic can't fix everything," he adds as he pulls back to place a kiss at the corner of my mouth. "Personality for example." He says and I laugh a little. He's officially making me feel better about the whole thing.

"We should go back down," I say, pulling away from him. I realize this is a dangerous situation to be in with him and I need the safety of other people. It's one of my rules.

"Not yet. Let's wait for your clothes. Even though you look wonderful in those pants."

I make a face. "I didn't realize your mother was so small."

"That's what happens when you barely eat," he says dismissively and I frown.

"Does it…" he looks up. "Does it bother you that your parents are never home?" I ask and he raises his eyebrow. "Pansy said that your parents are always gone."

"I don't mind it," he says as he takes my hand until I'm sitting beside him. "I don't know what I would do if they were here all the time, actually. They bother me."

"My parents bother me too," I admit as we lay back on the bed and he props himself above me with his elbow. "You know, I've been sneaking out to hang out with you." I admit and he frowns.

"Because they don't like me."

I shake my head. I haven't even told them about him to be honest. "No. They don't want me leaving the house any more without supervision. My Mom even brings me to work now…. It's ridiculous."

"Why are you they doing that?" he asks as he puts his hand on my hip, under his shirt.

I open my mouth to tell him about Ron and his friends leaving, but I stop myself. I don't know why. "I'm not sure," I say with a shrug. "They just want to keep better watch on me I guess."

"That's no fun," he says and I nod my head.

"Draco?" I ask as he goes back to nuzzling my neck.

"Hm?"

"Do you think…" I was going to ask him if he thought the Dark Lord was back… no one believed Harry but my family and Hermione…. But I stop myself from saying anything. "Nevermind."

He doesn't say anything to that and I close my burning eyes again, yawning against the pillow. I fall asleep like that and when I wake up its morning.

"Fuck," I say as I sit up.

Draco's not in bed at me and I look at the clock on the bedside table. It's six o'clock. My father will be getting up for work soon.

"Fuck," I say again, a little more panicked as I jump from the bed. I look around his room for a moment and spot my clothes, clean and folded on one of his chairs. I strip quickly and pull my newly cleaned clothes on, all the while cussing softly to myself, praying that my parents haven't noticed that I'm gone. "Fuck," I say again as I slip on my one shoe and leave the bedroom. "Fuck, fucking, fuck," I say as I go running down the steps.

"Watch your mouth." I stop in my tracks at the bottom of the stairs and I sigh in relief when I see Draco looking all amused as he leans against the wall. "Ladies shouldn't be cussing," he says with a smirk as he holds out my silver sandal.

"She actually got it?" I ask as I take it from him and slip it on my foot. He nods his head.

"Of course she did. I told her to," he says like everyone always follows his orders.

I look him over. He looks all refreshed and ready for the day. He's wearing another suit and his hair is combed perfectly into place. I think of my own disheveled appearance and I sneer inwardly. I hate him a little right now.

"Why didn't you wake me up?" I ask as I run towards the front door, angry with myself. "You knew I had to be home."

"I wasn't going to wake you up," he says as he follows behind me. "You looked like you were too comfortable."

"My parents are going to kill me," I mutter to myself as I start off towards the garage so I can get my stupid bike. "I'm going to be grounded until I'm thirty."

"Only if they find out," Draco adds, and then he grabs my arm. "Let me Apparate you," he says and I shake my head.

"I didn't bring my wand."

"That's why I said I'd Apparate you," he says like I was stupid. "I am a wizard after all."

"Oh…" I look at the garage and then to him. I still don't want him to see my house. "No… no it's okay."

A house-elf wheels out my bike and then I walk it toward the front gate with Draco by my side.

"Be careful," he says as the gates open and I hop on my bike. "I'll see you later, right?"

"Right," I say with a nod of my head and then I feel his hand on my back, so I tilt my neck to kiss his cheek. "Thanks for saving my life," I tell him honestly.

"No problem," he says with a wink and then I take off.

When I get to my house, I creep back into the yard and carefully place my bike back into the shed. I climb back up the drain pipe to my room and I turn off my radio. I peel out of my clothes and crawl into my bed in my underwear, falling into a deep sleep after I yawn into my pillow.

Then my alarm goes off.

"Oh, bloody hell," I mutter tiredly into my pillow.

* * *

"Ginevra," Dr. Carol grins at me with her tortoiseshell glasses on the bridge of her nose. "I haven't seen you since you were thirteen. You've grown up beautifully."

"Thank you, Dr. Carol," I say politely as I put my hands on my lap and look around the room. Not much has changed in the three years I've been gone. There are still blue and white bird paintings on the wall behind her head and there's a book shelf full of books I've never read before to the left of me. "It's good to see you as well," I add as I look back to her. She looks older and her hair is shorter then I remember. I notice all this, but I don't point it out.

"I'm glad to hear that," she says as she picks up her quill. I hate this part and I look down at my knees. "So to get right into it… how have you been?"

"I've been good," I tell her honestly. "I've got a summer job and I'm still saving up for that retreat."

"You're still writing?" she asks as she marks something down with her quill. I learned when I was eleven not to be bothered by it.

"Yes," I tell her seriously. "I like it."

"What do you write about?" I hate the series of questions that always come along during these sessions. I used to like it when I was young and needed someone to talk to, but now… now I just hate them.

I shrug. "Stuff."

"What kind of stuff?" she presses and I sigh.

"Just stories I think up and things like that… nothing like a diary," I finish so she doesn't think I'm falling back into that dangerous habit. "I only write topical things from my life when I'm mad."

"Do you think about the diary often?" she asks and we both know what diary she's talking about. We talked about it at length when I was younger.

"No, I never think of it," I state honestly. In fact, I've put it so far back in my mind that I barely even remember most of it. For the best, of course.

"Never?" she questions with her sharp eyebrow raised.

"Never," I confirm, wanting to drop it.

"Dr. Carol," someone beeps the speaker on the desk and Carol apologizes to me before leaning forward and pressing the main button.

"Yes?" She says into the speaker, looking impatient.

"I'm sorry to bother you, but Eddie Meyers out here. He says it's important."

She looks at me and then back at the speaker. "I'll be there in a moment," she says, taking her finger off the button. "I'm sorry, Ginevra," She says formally as she stands up and buttons her suit jacket. "I must see what this is about. Make yourself at home while I'm gone," she says gesturing around the room before leaving me alone with the door closed.

Dr. Carol is a children's psychiatrist and everything in her room is designed to put young people at ease. I glance beside me at the table full of children's books and casually pick one up.

Fairy tales and other stories…. I raise my brows before sitting the large book against my lap and flipping through it, looking at the pictures and scanning a few words before settling back to read one of the stories. Of course, I know most of these, learning them from my own childhood.

_The tale of the serpent and the Queen_

This one seems good and depressing. There's a drawing of a snake with its tail dipped in blood and I lean back into the chair to read it.

_-A warlock king was traveling through a small village in disguise to see how his people lived. While walking, he saw three beautiful sisters sitting in a garden, braiding each other's long fair hair. Entranced, he approached the sisters who remained oblivious to his presence and he hid behind a rose bush to listen to their sweet voices. _

There's a drawing of the three sisters on the page. They all look the same, really, with hair all the way down to their knees. Impractical is what that is. Who would want hair that long?

_The oldest sister, by far the tallest of the three, said that if she were to marry the king she would fill each hall with jewels and golden coins in his honor to please him. _

_The second sister, by far the smallest of the three, said that if she were to marry the king she would hold a weeklong festival for everyone in the kingdom to attend in his honor to please him. _

_The third sister, by far the fairest of the three, said that if she were to marry the king she would give him two strong sons who would grow up to be very powerful wizards who will one day rule the world. _

_The king revealed himself to the three surprised sisters and chose the third to be his wife for he liked what she had said. When the youngest sister married the king and became queen, the other sisters grew jealous of her status and they planned to ruin her. _

_The new queen soon became pregnant and the king rejoiced, but was soon called to war. While he was away, the Queen gave birth to twin boys who were both healthy and strong. The sisters, in their jealousy, kidnapped the children just seconds after their birth while their mother was sleeping and brought them to the lake where they put each baby under water until they stopped breathing. _

I make a face at that last sentence and turn the book over to read the title again. This is a terrible story to tell a child, talking about killing babies and all that… but I want to know the rest so I turn back to the page.

_A dark wizard saw the other sisters drowning the young princes and he turned himself into a serpent to hide his form. When the children were pulled from the water, the dark wizard noticed that each baby had a spark of magic still left in them. Knowing them to be from a powerful linage with powerful magic, the dark wizard put a spell on the babies to keep that spark of life alive before the sisters buried them in the King's garden. Two rose bushes grew over night where the boys had been buried and they would whisper to each other when no one was around._

_The oldest sister had taken two small dogs from the courtyard and placed them in the princes' cradles. Finally, when the Queen awoke she asked to see her children, but the oldest sister told her that she had given birth to beasts and she showed her sister the dogs. The queen was distraught. She knew in her heart that something terrible had happened to her children, but when the King came back from war and was shown the two dogs by the middle sister he did not believe her worries. _

_The king, thinking his new Queen was a dark witch, snapped her wand and banished her to the sea. On a small boat, where she was sure to die, the Queen spent days alone in the middle of the ocean adding more water to it with her tears. On the seventh day, thirsty and hungry, the youngest sister was near death when Dark wizard found her and disguised himself as a serpent once more, appearing on her small boat. _

_The dark wizard told the youngest sister he could bring her children back to life only if she would make a oath to swear by magic that one of her decedents will give themselves to someone from his bloodline, making them heir to the kingdom and passing on the powerful magic of her family to his. The serpent also added that for the resurrection to work, the Queen would have to die by her own hand. _

_The Queen was sad, but knowing she was going to die on the boat anyway, and wanting her sons back, she considered his offer. The youngest sister asked the serpent when and who the decedents would be and the Dark wizard looked far into the future, having the gift of sight, and he replied that when the seventh moon is in the second house, their families would become one. _

_The youngest sister was hesitant, but wanted her children alive again so she agreed. A dagger appeared in front of the sister and she plunged it in her chest…. _

"Oh, my," I whisper as I raise my eyebrows. What kind of person reads this to a child? There's even a picture….

_She died, sealing the agreement with the dark wizard who went to the king's garden to awaken the sleeping dead children from the dirt. Because of their mother's sacrifice the Dark Wizard was able to bring them to life to fulfill his deal and the boys went to their father's house. The king knew them as his sons and when they told their father of the older sisters misdeeds he had them burned as dark witches. _

_When the seventh moon is in the second house a powerful union between… _

"I'm so sorry that took so long."

I jump and slam the book shut as Carol comes back into the room, looking a little flustered by trying to hide it.

"Let's see," she says as she sits down and takes out her notes again, placing her glasses back on her nose. "Where were we?"

I put the book back on the table and stare at the cover for a few moments, trying not to be disturbed by that terrible children's story.

"Ah, yes," she says with a small smile and then she looks at me, becoming serious once again. "Have you had any nightmares recently?"

"No," I say quickly as my palms begin to sweat and I wipe them on my skirt. Being here with her is bringing back things I'd rather not remember right now. "Not since… the last time I talked to you," I say awkwardly and she nods and writes something down.

"No headaches or panic attacks either?"

"Nope," I say, trying not to be uncomfortable. The last time I had a panic attack was when I was twelve. I went into my grandmother's basement to get a jar of peaches and the damp smell of the room triggered memories of the chamber and the snake and _him_… It was the same smell and my grandfather found me an hour later, curled in the corner trying to catch my breath. I avoid triggers like that now. "I've been perfect."

"Let's move on," she says and I nod. Thank god. "Why do you think your parents wanted you to see me again?"

"Because they're annoying and overprotective," I say bitterly and she looks at me before nodding her head. She doesn't say anything, so I give in. "Ron left with Harry and Hermione… no one knows where they went and my parents are worried. That's why I'm here."

"Do you believe the Dark Lord is back?" she slams that question on me and I blink a few times.

"What?"

"I know Harry Potter has been blasted in the media for saying so. Do you believe him?"

"Of course," I say with a furrowed brow. "My whole family does."

"Why?" she questions and I pause a moment, trying to think of what I want to say, and then I narrow my eyes for her even questioning it.

"Why would anyone lie about that?" I snap and she smiles at me again, a serene and irritating smile.

"Indeed," she says. "The last time we spoke you were still quite enamored with Mr. Potter…."

"I'm not anymore," I say quickly. Of course I loved him then. He saved my live and he was the sweetest boy. "I'm dating someone now," I say as I think of Draco, not wanting her or anyone else thinking I'm still hung up on Harry Potter. "I like him a lot."

She smiles at me… it's a genuine one this time. "I'm pleased to hear that. Is he a good guy?" she questions.

"Not really. I mean he kind of is… in a different way," I say truthfully as I tug on the bottom of my skirt. She looks at me oddly for the admission and I bite my lip because I'm about to say something very revealing, something that I haven't even admitted to myself. She is my psychologist after all, maybe she can help. "He reminds me of Tom." I whisper and she pauses a second, letting it sink in. I haven't even dared that thought to surface and when I finally say it, I realize how true it is.

"How does he remind you of Tom Riddle?" she says, her voice taking a different tone, a serious tone, a worried tone.

"He's really smart," I say as I start rubbing my hands along the fabric of my dress again. She notices it, so I start doing it even more. It's a nervous gesture I haven't done for years. "He's handsome," I say as I start pressing my palms into my thighs until it actually starts burning. "He can be cold and cruel, but charming at the same time. He makes me feel special." I remember that look that flashed eyes during the party at his house… that jealous and malicious look that made me feel uncomfortable. I know why now… it reminded me of _him._

"What do you mean by cruel?" she asks and I shake my head. "Does he treat you well?"

"Very well," I admit as I think of Draco and how nice he was to me on my birthday. "And my parents would hate it if they knew who he was."

"Why is that?" she asks. "Who is he and why would your parents care?"

Might as well tell the truth, she is under legal obligation to keep my secrets anyways. "Draco Malfoy."

The name hangs in the air for a while and I know she hasn't been able to come up with a proper response just yet. The evil part of me is pleased by that.

"Draco Malfoy?" she repeats, like she was testing the name out and I nod my head. "His father is Lucius Malfoy," she says and I nod again. "The man who gave you the diary that started all of this in the first place?"

"Yes." I'm not an idiot.

"And you think that's a good idea?" she asks, but I stand up, wiping my fingers on my skirt one last time.

"I have to go to work," I say quickly because I don't want to talk about it until I come to terms with it.

"Alright," she says as she takes off her glasses and then she pulls out a thin sheet of pink paper. Prescription paper. "I know you've been off medication for a while," she says as she scratches something down. "But I want you to fill this. They're anti-panic pills. If you feel an attack coming on, I want you to take two."

"Okay," I say, grabbing the pink paper from her once she hands it to me. "See you later, Dr. Carol."

"Good bye, Ginevra," she says as she stands up as well. "Be safe."

When I reach the waiting room, my Mom is sitting on one of the green couches with a magazine across her lap. When she sees me, she stands with a smile on her face.

"How was it?" she asks as she walks towards me, noticing the pink slip in my hand.

"I don't want to go back," I tell her hotly as I hand the prescription to her and I stomp outside so she can Apparate us to folk hills. "You're overreacting. I'm perfectly fine."

"I just thought with Ron gone, and things being as they are, that you would want someone to talk to again."

I cross my arms and huff. "I'm fine."

"If you say so," she says sadly as she puts her arm on mine. When we Apparate to the club, she puts my hair behind my shoulder and studies my face. "You would tell us, wouldn't you Ginny… if you were having the headaches again?"

"Of course," I say with an irritated eye roll and she kisses my cheek before seeing me off to work. I'm a little early, so I wonder around the lobby for a few minutes before heading back to the check out station. Nadia is working with me today and when she greets me I can barely manage a smile.

I can't even look at her.

I try my best to avoid getting in her line of sight, but being in this little closet is making it very difficult. "Ginny?" Nadia says as I pretend to clean the same section of the counter with a cloth I found.

"Hm?" I ask, trying not to glance behind me. I don't want to see her and make a face after finding out about her 'special service' stuff.

"Are you angry with me?" she asks worriedly. "You haven't been speaking to me all day. It's making me feel weird."

"No, I'm not angry with you. Why would I be angry with you?"I laugh nervously as I wipe the counter yet again. "I'm just feeling unwell." I say and then I make a face. I'm just feeling unwell? What the bloody hell does that mean?

"Oh, well, I hope you feel better."

"Thanks," I say awkwardly and I look up when I see movement. Daphne and Pansy are walking towards my booth, flanked on each side of a very sour looking Millicent Bustrode. I would hide if it wasn't so obvious.

"What can I do for you ladies today?" Nadia says nicely, but they ignore her as they slide in front of me.

"Do you have something you'd like to say to Ginny?" Pansy asks as she pushes Millicent towards me. I flinch a bit.

"I'm sorry I pushed you into the lake," she says flatly, obviously not meaning it. I'm glad I'm behind my work counter because I don't know what I would do with myself if I didn't have the barrier. "It was careless and rude of me. And I'm sorry."

"Don't act like you mean it or anything," Daphne says with an eyeroll. "What do you say, Ginny?" She says as she looks at me with twinkling eyes. "Do you forgive her?"

"Um…" Is all I say because this is awkward and I bite my lip. I glance at Nadia, but all I can see is Blaise doing the blowjob movement and I turn away quickly.

"Can we just get this over with so we can tell him it's fine now?" Millicent says with a huff as she crosses her arms.

"Tell who?"I ask but no one says anything. "Whatever. It's okay," I say so she'll go away.

"There, see, everything is fine." Millicent makes a face before walking off, leaving Daphne and Pansy to smirk in her wake.

"Draco yelled at her again," Daphne smiles a little as she leans over to counter. "It was kind of sweet actually," she says as she fixes my hair. I make a face as she pushes the bangs away from my face, but I don't go to stop her.

"If you say so," I say and I look at Pansy who's watching Nadia with an arched eyebrow. "Uh, well…What are you guys doing tonight?" I ask, trying to get the attention away from the girl I work with.

"Not too much," Daphne says with a shrug as she starts picking her nails. "Sleep over maybe." She looks at Pansy. "What do you say, Pans? Maybe we could hit up the boardwalk. I haven't even been on the Ferris wheel yet."

"Yeah, sure," she says flatly, still staring at Nadia. I cough to get her to look at me… but she doesn't. "So, your name is Nadia, right?" she asks snidely and I look at Nadia as she nods her head nervously. "How does it feel to suck—"

"Oh, okay," I say quickly, cutting her off and actually sliding in front of Nadia. "Enough of that. Nadia, do you want to take your break. I'll watch the floor," I say quickly.

"Yeah. Uh, okay," she says with wide eyes and then she leaves. Once she's gone I turn to Pansy and make a face.

"I'm glad you didn't finish that sentence," I say and Daphne laughs as Pansy hops on top of the counter with her legs crossed.

"I almost wish you would have let her keep talking. _How does it feel to suck_ sounded like such a wonderful way to start a conversation."

Pansy laughs a little, breaking her cold façade as she shrugs her small shoulders. "Oh well. I think we're going to go to the pool for a little bit," she says and I nod my head in understanding. "I'll get a hold of you later, yeah?" he says and I nod my head.

"I'll see you guys later."

They walk away and I get back to work, putting rich peoples things into a locker and getting paid for it. Nadia comes back from her break some time later, and I try to ignore her. A part of me is disgusted with what they said she does and then another part is kind of curious, but I stomp that part down. It's not in my best interest to question anything further.

"So…" She starts, but I cut her off… rather rudely, actually but I try not to feel bad about it.

"I'm going to dust in the back before I leave," I tell her and I take the cloth and go towards the back by the lockers.

"Whatever," I hear her mumble bitterly. I guess she's fed up with the way I'm acting towards her and I can't say I blame her.

I start wiping down the lockers, pretending to clean when I hear high heels tapping against the marble floor. I don't bother looking until I hear Nadia's voice.

"Mrs. Malfoy," she says and I freeze. Mrs. Malfoy? That has to be Draco's mother. I've seen her at the club once or twice but never here, never this close. "It's so good to see you."

I look over my shoulder at Draco's mother as she answers. "Charmed," is all she says and her voice sounds like a bell.

Mrs. Malfoy is beautiful. I mean, like_ really_ beautiful. She's very tall and very thin and her honey colored hair is always smooth and styled to perfection making her the darling of every magazine that talk about style and fashion. Today she's wearing a yellow dress with a chic white jacket that she has cinched at her waist with a black patent belt. Her golden hair is done up in a twist with two strands curled around her temples making her look like a polished modern day princess.

"What can we do for you today?" Nadia asks and I peek over my shoulder again, trying to hide my face.

She's wearing large black sunglasses and she brings a gloved hand up to pull them off. She's looking right at me and a slow smile creeps onto her lips as her ice blue eyes look me over. I gulp and face the lockers again, feeling my cheeks heat up.

"Just put these away for me please," she says and I dare another glance. She's taking off the delicate white gloves and she's still looking at me. Surveying me… judging me. Does she know about Draco and I? I feel my heart drop… does she know I wore her pants?

"Of course, Mrs. Malfoy," Nadia says as she gathers up her things and starts walking back towards me by the lockers. She makes an excited face and puts them away, taking the ticket that pops out. "The Malfoy's tip so well," she whispers happily before walking back to Draco's mother.

"Here you go, Mrs. Malfoy," Nadia says, handing her ticket to the regal looking woman who is still looking at me.

I feel very uncomfortable and I tuck some hair behind my ear before smoothing out my skirt nervously. Why is she looking at me?

"I will see you later," Mrs. Malfoy's bell like voice says and I look at her again. She winks at me and walks off.

Oh, dear lord, what was that about?

I put my hand on my forehead once she's gone and I lean against the wall as Nadia counts her tips. "Jeez," she whistles as she puts the coins in her purse. "She just tipped me two weeks worth of pay. Can you believe that?"

I don't say anything.

It remains awkward and uncomfortable until my shift ends and I leave as quickly as I can so I can meet my mother at the Apparation point. While I'm going down the back hallway with my bag slung over my shoulder I hear an odd thumping noise coming from one of the closets. I've learned my lesson not to bother when I hear strange noises coming from places like that and I walk on past. Then I think of finding Cho and Draco in the closet and something like paranoia runs through me.

What if he's in there with Cho again, fooling around with her when he thinks I'm not here?

The jerk.

I put my bag down and take out my wand before stomping back towards the closet. Unjust jealousy is pooling through my system as I imagine all the terrible things Cho is probably doing to Draco in the closet and I open the door without a warning only to find a very surprised looking Luna and Theo the Creep.

"Oh," I say as I lower my wand. She quickly lowers her dress and he smirks as he buckles his pants. "Oh," I repeat because Luna is the last person I thought I'd find doing dirty things in the closet. "What?" I end up saying as Luna straightens herself out before turning to me, not looking least bit embarrassed.

"Hello, Ginny," she says like it was an everyday occurrence for this to happen and I open my mouth a few times for a reply but nothing comes out.

"Luna," I whisper as I send a look to Theo. "You barely know him," I settle on saying and she smiles at me. I can't recall her even kissing anyone before.

"Ginny, you're one to talk," she says and I raise my eyebrows in surprise because of the way she just said that. "You snog Draco all the time, and in a roomful of people no less," she says and I open my mouth to defend myself before realizing she wasn't even at the party when that happened.

"How do you know?" I ask suspiciously and then I look at Theo who's smiling at me like the creep he is.

"Theodore told me," she says as she pats down her hair. "It's not a big deal, Gin. Everything is consensual and exciting."

I glare at that Theodore kid again and he leans against the closet wall. "Consensual maybe," he says with a smirk. "It looks like you were being punished actually."

"What are you talking about?" I hiss because I don't like him.

"At Draco's party," he says as he pushes off the wall. "I was there when he pulled you away to scold you."

"He didn't scold me," I lie.

"Perhaps I was wrong," he says and I sneer before turning to Luna. She's braiding her hair, not noticing our exchange in the least bit.

"You were. Anyways, Luna….. I just got off work. Do you want to walk with me to the Appration point?" I ask so I can talk to her some more but she shakes her head.

"Not particularly."

I glare at her, she doesn't notice and then I glare at Theo the creep before turning on my heels and leaving angrily with a blush on my cheeks. Without fail my mother is waiting outside for me. I don't say anything to her and when we get home I take a quick shower and then get dressed in my pj's. It's barely even dinner time, but I feel like being comfortable anyways.

I grab some fingernail polish and I tie my hair back before going down stairs and sitting in the living room. I shake the pink fingernail polish before unscrewing the lid and putting my foot on the table so I can start on my toes first. My parents are sitting around the radio, listening to the news and I roll my eyes at them before carefully painting my nails.

"Did you have a good day at work?" my father asks me during a commercial and I nod my head before putting my chin on my knee. "Anything worth talking about?" he asks and I shake my head as I move to my second toe.

"Have you been paying attention to the news, Ginny?" My mother asks and I shrug as I think about Luna in that creepy closet with creepy Theodore Nott. I need to write her a letter, I've decided.

"Why?" I ask lazily as I quickly do the rest of my toes, wiggling my right foot to dry the polish quicker before moving to the left.

"Things are happening," My father says and out of the corner of my eye I see him stand and walk to where I am until he's sitting down on the table I'm using to prop up my feet. I continue to paint my nails, but when he coughs and my mother sits beside me on the couch, I realize this is going to turn into a serious talk, so I put the lid back on and set it to the side. "It's very on the down low right now but you know that Lord Voldemort is back."

"Yes," I say uncomfortably as I put my feet back on the ground. "That's why I'm never allowed to go anywhere by myself now," I add softly.

"Things are happening right now," he says again and then he glances at my mother. I look at her too and then back to him. "The world is changing and people aren't accepting the facts," he says seriously and I raise my eyebrows. "There have been instances in the muggle community… deaths…. Unexplained disappearances..."

"You think he has something to do with it?" I say flatly and he nods his head. Of course he has something to do with it, I think bitterly. He's the Dark Lord.

"Gin," he says and then he makes his thinking face as he pushes up his glasses. "What I'm trying to say is that I don't know if it's the best idea for you to work at Folk hills anymore."

"Why?" I ask sharply and he looks at my Mother for support.

"I think that the kind of people who frequent that club are not the kind of people you want to be around right now, Gin," she says as she gives me a sympathetic smile. "We have no idea what 'you-know-who' is doing or why he's in hiding, but half of those people at Folk Hills are sure to follow him."

"That's very judgmental," I state and she raises her eyebrows.

"Ginny," my father sighs and leans forward with his elbows on his knees. "You know that most of the rich aristocratic purebloods backed Lord Voldemort during the first war," he says and my spine tingles at the name again. "And it can only be assumed that most of them helped him come back."

I don't say anything right away. I stare at him for a few moments and then I turn to my mother. "So, what is this about?"

"Sweetheart," my mother puts her hand on my thigh. "We want you to quit Folk Hills."

"What?" I say and then I look at my Dad. "But I'm saving for the retreat," I say and my Dad shakes his head.

"You can find another job," he says and I narrow my eyes.

"Not one that would pay as well," I defend, angry that they would approach me this way. I just bought a lot of new things… I need to replace the money in my account and the tips at Folk Hills are one of the only places that can do that for me. "You didn't mind when I first started working there."

"I know that," Dad says with his hands up. He knows that I'm getting upset and he's trying to calm me down. "But I think now is the time for you to stop going there. It's for your own good. I can talk to Browning to see if I can get you a job at the Ministry for the duration of the summer," he says quickly and I narrow my eyes.

"There are more snakes at the Ministry than at Folk Hills," I hiss and he nods his head.

"But at least at the Ministry I could keep my eye on you."

So, that's what this is about.

Hmf.

"I wouldn't even need a job if you guys could afford to send me to that stupid retreat on your own," I say hatefully before standing up and stomping towards my bedroom. I wanted that last part to sting, but I think it just made me feel guilty instead.

I lock my door and lay down on my bed with my arms crossed angrily under my chest. I inhale a deep breath and then I look down at my toes. I sneer. There are three on my left foot left unpainted and I make a face when I remember I left the nail polish down stairs.

Just wonderful.

I refuse to go back down after my dramatic exit, so I just hide out in my room the rest of the night. After a very fitful and annoying night without any sleep, I pull myself out of bed for breakfast. I dress quickly in my typical shorts and tank top and I tie my hair in a bun before heading down stairs. I refuse to eat my mother's cooking because it didn't seem right because I was still mad at them, so I grabbed a banana, peeling it while my father ate his eggs and bacon.

"Ginny," he says when I go walk out of the room, and Mom looks at me over her shoulder. "Take a seat," he says and I sigh loudly before falling down into the seat beside his own like a pouting child. I take a sour bite of the fruit and slump back. "Listen, I know why you're upset…"

"Do you?" I question like a brat after swallowing and he nods his head.

"After you went to bed, I got a hold of browning. He said there was a spot open in the janitorial squad. It would be part time and you would work in my wing."

"Janitorial squad?" I question snidely. "Like cleaning?"

"There is nothing wrong with cleaning," My mother sniffs and I make a face.

"No and no," I say as I stand up.

"You don't have much of a choice, Gin," my father replies, trying to be stern with me and I glare at him. "You live under my roof, you follow my rules."

"This isn't a set rule," I hiss. "This is just something you made up because you don't trust me."

"It's not that I don't trust you, sweetheart. I just think it would be better…"

"You're only doing this because Ron left. It's not fair that I'm being punished because of them!"

"You're not being punished," my dad sighs loudly. "Just calm down and listen to me, alright."

"I'm going for a walk," I cut him off as I pull on my shoes.

"You are not leaving this house," My mother says, waving a spatula at me like a crazy person. Why is she always cooking? Doesn't she ever do anything else! "You will stay here and talk to your father like a sane person."

"I'm going for a walk!" I yell because I'm mad and I stomp outside with my arms crossed tightly over my chest. She follows me out, but I end up running until I get to the gate. I don't even bother unlatching it… I just jump over the fence and take off.

I haven't been keeping in much shape this summer and I get a knot in my side halfway down the road. I stop running to walk it out with my hand on my hip. I'll need to start exercising again if I want to make the Quidditch team this year… that is, if my parents allow me to go back to Hogwarts. That might be one of their new made up rules for me. I know I can't go back, not yet anyways so I go to the only other place where I know I'm welcome and a place that would make my parents skin crawl if they knew. It takes me half an hour to walk there, but it was well worth it. My temper had gone down considerably and I had some time to clear my head before pressing the button on the speaker.

"Malfoy residence," the elf says and I exhale slowly.

"Is Draco home?" I ask, all shyness gone.

The elf must know my voice because the gate creaks open without me having to identify myself. I step inside and go straight towards the front door that opens for me as well.

"The Master is in the study," a small elf with silver hair tells me as I walk inside and I nod my head before heading that way after it gives me directions.

Draco is reading a book and when I walk into the room, he stands up. "I think I need to give you the password," he says as he puts a book mark between the pages to hold his spot. I realize it's the blue ribbon he stole from me and I feel something warm in my chest. "You come here so often," he finishes with a small smile.

"I'm sorry for coming by unannounced again," I tell him as I slip off my shoes. I don't want to get the cream colored carpet dirty after all. "I just wanted to get out of the house for a little while."

"That's alright," he says as I start to walk towards him. "I understand completely," he says with a smirk and when I get close enough I take his book and throw it on the couch. "What are you—"

He didn't get to finish that question because I grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him down for a kiss. He didn't seem to mind much because he opened his mouth right away and he laughed a little before wrapping his hands around my waist. I'm so upset with my parents and if they ever knew I snogged Draco Malfoy or went to his house on my own they would probably lock me in my room for the rest of the summer.

That thought makes me kiss back with more passion and Draco maneuvers us until we're lying down on the couch. My hands slide through his hair. It's damp and I figure he must have been swimming in the lake not too long ago…It still is pretty early in the morning. I even dare to go under his shirt to feel his strong stomach and he breathes out heavily as I hook a leg around his. We kiss heatedly for a while until he pulls back, moving his lips to my neck as his fingers start to skim up my thigh. When he reaches the button on my shorts, I tense up and grab his wrist.

"I know, I know," he whispers before pulling his hand back and placing a kiss on the corner of my mouth.

I pull back for a second and I look up at him. His eyes look especially silver today and the sun is hitting him at just the right angle, making him look otherworldly. I bring a hand up to his forehead, running my fingers along his hair line… His eyelashes are so dark, making his eyes stand out brightly against them. I know he looks like his father, but after seeing Narcissa Malfoy, I know that there's some of her in him too.

He's so good looking and I love the way he feels.

I think about Luna in that closet with Theo… she's never even had a boyfriend and now she's doing that with a boy she just met in a closet… I don't think I would be a slag if I let Draco touch me like Pansy had said…

"No," is all I say as I take his hand and bring it back to the top of my shorts as I unbutton them myself. Being with Draco makes me feel good and the things he does make me feel good too. Who cares what my parents would think? Not me right now.

"Are you sure?" he asks as I put his hand under the waist band of my knickers. I kiss his neck and shiver as his fingers slide all the way down until they're…. _there_.

"Yes," I whisper, tilting my head so I can find his lips again. I can feel him smirk against my mouth as his fingers dip inside of me and the tightness it makes my body feel causes my hips to raise.

"It hurts," I whisper worriedly and he bends down to shush in my ear.

"You're tight," he says and I blush. "I'm only using one finger," he says and I inhale a shaky breath.

"Just kind of go slow." I tell him awkwardly as I lift my hips again as his fingers run against me. "I don't…" I trail off because I don't want to admit my inexperience right now.

"I know," he says with a little smile as he kisses my cheek. "Haven't you ever touched yourself down here?" he asks and my cheeks heat up again. I found out on my own that I didn't need to put my fingers in anywhere to have an orgasm and when his fingers slide against that particular bundle of nerves, I make a noise in the back of my throat. I refuse to answer his question, though, because that's embarrassing. Instead I put my face in the crook of his neck and suck on his skin.

My body starts to heat up and put my hand on his face so I can turn his head to mine so I can kiss him again just because it feels good. He removes his hand from my knickers for a second and I make a disappointed noise before I realize what he's doing. He pulls down the strap of my tank top and pushes my bra to the side to reveal my breast. He kisses me there and I feel my hands shaking as he opens his mouth and actually sucks. Everything tingles and everything feels intense and I want to feel his skin so I push him back and grab the bottom of his shirt, pulling it over his head until he throws it to the side with an amused smile.

He settles back on top of me, his body warm and heavy against my own and he kisses my neck again as his fingers disappear beneath my knickers. I don't think I've ever been this turned on actually.

I'm getting fingered by Draco Malfoy and I haven't even had lunch yet.

He whispers in my ear that he's going to add another finger and I cover my mouth with my hand and make a muffled moan as my body begins to tingle everywhere. I know what's going to happen next if he keeps moving his hand against me like that, so I put my hand in his hair and pull him up so I can kiss him again. Pulling back for air, I look down and I can see his hand moving inside of my shorts and I can feel myself getting more turned on as he sucks on my ear. I move my face towards his for another heated kiss and then I just bite his lip when I feel my body starting to burst. It starts from my middle and then waves all through my body in a pleasurable hum. I make another whimpering noise against his mouth that he smiles at as I turn my whole body towards his because I like feeling the closeness of it.

I feel overly relaxed and happy once it's over and I blink a few times as he pulls out a handkerchief from his pocket to clean his fingers. I don't even find that disgusting because I'm feeling too wonderful right now. I slump against the couch, not even realizing when I started breathing so hard.

"You liked that," he points out smugly and I would have hit his arm if I could find the energy.

"Yeah…" I trail off and when he smirks down at me, I kiss him. "Thank you," I say and he laughs.

"You haven't seen anything yet," he says with a devilish smile and I laugh as he rolls on top of me, holding my wrists down. A thrill goes through me and I laugh again when he playfully bites my neck.

"Draco."

I freeze when I hear that sharp, deep voice and Draco sits back as he lets go of my wrists, giving me an amused smile because I'm frightened.

"Relax," he says as the footsteps come closer to the door. He stands up and casually throws on his shirt like it wasn't a big deal. "It's just my father," he says as I quickly button up my shorts and I sit straight, putting my tank top and bra back into place as my cheeks burn. Just his father, indeed.

"Should I leave?" I ask seriously and he laughs.

"Of course not," he says like I was silly and I pull my hair tie out so I can redo my bun to make it more presentable. "Just try not to act like you just came all over my fingers," he says with a sly smile and I glare at him.

When the door opens, I grab a pillow and cradle it to my chest.

"There you are," Lucius Malfoy says as he takes off his cloak and walks into the room with a raised brow. He's wearing a three piece suit his short white hair is combed back away from his face. "I've been calling for you," he says in that deep voice as he takes out a pocket watch to check the time. "We were due for brunch at ten thirty," he says and I bite the insides of my mouth so hard I think I might start bleeding.

"Good afternoon, father," Draco says and then he looks back at me as I stand up. That makes Mr. Malfoy look at me too and when his silver eyes level with mine I suddenly remember everything.

Just like when I was twelve and had a panic attack in my grandmother's basement it all came crashing down at me at once. The diary, the chamber, Tom Riddle and his cold fingers…. It was already on the forefront of my mind after that stupid therapy session, but seeing Lucius Malfoy looking at me like that…. I just can't handle it.

I can feel myself starting to breath heavier, I can see Draco and his father's confused faces as I back up, trying to catch my breath. I can see Tom standing there, telling me wonderful things to get me to do what he wants. I can't breathe…. I keep backing up until I hit the wall and I close my eyes as I make terrible noises and my head becomes dizzy. Dating Draco was a bad idea. I'm clenching my fists so tight that my nails break skin and it burns. I feel like the walls are closing in and that my heart is going so fast that it will probably stop soon. I'm going to die. I slide down the wall until I'm sitting on the ground and I cover my face with my right hand.

_Dark magic lingers, little Ginny. _

That's what Tom always used to say. I wonder how much of it lingers in Mr. Malfoy.

"For god sakes, call a healer," I hear Lucius Malfoy quip cruelly and I can feel tears leaking from the corner of my eyes. I feel like I'm drowning again, only this is worse, much much worse.

"Ginny," I hear Draco say as he kneels in front of me. "Ginny, look at me," he says and I shake my head, still trying to catch my breath. "Look at me," he says with his hand on my shoulder. He pulls the hand I have covering my face away, and I snap it back to my side. Every muscle in my body is stiff and my lungs are on fire. "It's okay. Just look at me."

"Perhaps I should leave," I hear Mr. Malfoy say and I nod my head. "Oh, and she agrees." I can practically feel the sneer.

"Stop it," I hear Draco say seriously. He gets even closer to me and speaks in a soft, calming voice. "Gin, just calm down. Everything is okay."

It is not okay. It is not okay. It is not okay.

"Ginny," I feel hands on my face. "Baby, calm down."

Baby, calm down. Honestly. I shake my head. I need my pills. Carol was right to write me a new prescription for them. I should have brought them. I should have brought them. I should have brought them. I should have brought them.

I can't hear Draco anymore. He's talking to me, but I can't hear him so I just clench my eyes tighter until it all stops and things go dark.

I faint.

I actually pass out.

When I open my eyes again I'm on a boat in the middle of the sea talking to a snake with a dagger in my hand.


	5. Chapter 5

I was talking to a serpent.

It was hissing at me, spitting black ink all over my white dress. I tried to wipe it off as quickly as I could but I knew… I just knew I would never be able to get the stains out.

"Ginny…"

The snake turned into Tom.

"Ginny…"

Tom turned into Draco.

"Ginny…."

I turned into the snake.

"Ginny!"

I wake and try desperately to catch my breath before I hyperventilate. I haven't seen Tom like that in years... so real and tangible... I shake my head and try not to cry until I realize it was just a dream and I shouldn't be silly and let my heart race like it is. I close my eyes again and inhale slowly, leaning my head against the pillow behind me in an attempt to relax. It's soft. I run my fingers over the leather cushions…. Leather…. No furniture in my house is made from leather. I blink a few times and then look at where I'm actually laying...

Oh, no.

I sit up quickly, my cheeks heating in embarrassment. I'm laying on a white leather couch in the Malfoy's study and I feel like I'm going to throw up. I even put my hand over my mouth to stop myself. I want to run away and I swing my legs to the floor and sit up board straight as I try to figure out what I should do next. Is running really an option right now? I bring my hand up to my forehead when I remember why I was laying on this couch. I fainted. I fainted when I saw Draco's father and now I feel like dying. I'm so embarrassed and when Draco walks back into the room, I can't even look at him.

"My father left," he says flatly as I stare at my knees. "I had a healer come over," he says as he walks in and he takes a seat on the coffee table right in front of me. I shift my eyes away. A healer? Jesus, was I really that bad?

"He's a friend of the family," he adds. From the corner of my eyes I can see him tilting his head trying to see my face, but I fall into myself even deeper, slumping against the couch and crossing my arms self consciously as my hair falls in front of my face. "He said that you may have been having some sort of anxiety attack…"

"I know," I whisper so he'll stop talking about it. I am so embarrassed right now that I just want to disappear into the sofa. "Draco," I look at him, still tilting my head down in shame. "I am so sorry," I say slowly and he furrows his brows. "I can't believe that happened."

"Seeing my father upset you," he points out. It sounded more like a question than a statement actually.

"I think…" I say uncomfortably as I scratch my fingernails against my thighs, leaving white scrapes in their wake. "I think I should go home."

I start rubbing out the sting of the scratches to get rid of the evidence of that stupid nervous habit that I thought I grew out of…but Draco puts his hands over mine, stopping my fingers. I don't look at him right away and I exhale slowly before glancing up.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asks seriously, staring deeply into my eyes like he was trying to read my thoughts.

I shake my head and look down again.

I hear him sigh. "What would you like to do then?" he asks and I furrow my brows.

"I would like to go home," I whisper honestly. I'm not even mad at my parents anymore. I just need to go home and crawl into my bed. I go to stand up, but he won't let go of my hands so I slump back again. "Let go," I say softly.

"No," he says simply and I make a face.

"Let go," I repeat, jerking my hands back in defense, but he holds tight. "Let go of me," I hiss. I know I'm going to regret getting this angry at him, but this place isn't safe for me right now. Being with him isn't right. "I want to go home."

"I'll take you home," he counters and I shake my head, finally breaking my hands free.

"No." I stand up, smoothing down my clothes. "I can handle it."

"I'm taking you home," he says firmly. "You just passed out, Ginny. You're not okay."

"You don't know anything about me," I say cruelly and he raises his brows as I stomp past him so I can get my shoes. I slip them on without looking at him. I'm humiliated by what just happened and my humiliation turns into defensiveness that makes me hateful. "I'm going home," I tell him firmly, finally finding my voice.

I don't even bother with a goodbye as I stomp towards the front door. I am so stupid. So stupid and such a freak. I can't believe I had an attack in front of him… in front of his father. I have issues I know that, I just hate it when other people know it too. I knew Draco's father was Lucius Malfoy anyways. What was I expecting? Did I think I would never see him if I wanted a relationship with his son? He gave me a diary that nearly killed me. Whether he knew it or not, it had traumatized me and I'll never get over it.

_Stupid stupid stupid Ginny_. I berate myself all the way to the front door and I cuss under my breath as I leave the grounds when I realize I'm being followed.

"Leave me alone, Draco," I say stubbornly as I start walking faster down the dirt road. The sooner I get to my house the better.

"I'm allowed to walk," he says casually from behind me. Of course, he's so much taller than me that his legs give him an advantage.

Life is not fair.

"You're following me," I snap at him. "Go away."

He doesn't say anything to that, but he doesn't stop following me either and I remain stubbornly quiet as I walk with my hands clenched at my sides.

"You know," he says about twenty minutes into the walk. I ignore him. "This would be a lot easier if you would let me Apparate you," he says. "It would take a couple seconds, tops."

I don't say anything. I bite the inside of my mouth and continue to ignore him, but I stop when we reach the road before my house.

"Go home, Draco," I say as I stop in the middle of the road. I still don't want him to see my house. That would just be another embarrassment for me today. Why do we have to be so freaking poor?

"What's the point?" he asks and he walks around until he's standing in front of me. He puts his hands in his pockets and raises an eyebrow. God, he's attractive. Fuck him. "We're almost to your house."

"You wouldn't know," I tell him snidely as I put my hands on my hips. On top of the whole 'fainting' at his place thing, now I have a new anxiety of him seeing my house with it's peeling paint and patched roof... No, that's not happening. "Please just go home."

"I know where you live, Ginny," he tells me flatly, moving in front of me when I try to walk past him and sliding to the right to block me again when I try to get around from the other side.

"Get out of my way," I say to his throat and when he goes to touch me, I pull back quickly. "Leave me alone!"

I yelled. I actually yelled and I knew it was uncalled for, but I couldn't help it. The way he was looking at me, it changed. He look surprised almost... I took advantage of the pause and I passed him. He didn't follow.

"Where have you been?" My Mom hisses at me when I come through the door with a very deep and very somber frown on my face. I ignore her and go towards the stairs, trying not to feel bad about the way I just handled that situation. He must think terrible things of me now. "Ginevra Weasley, do not blow me off."

Still I don't say anything.

"When your Father gets back from work, we are going to have a long talk!" she calls after me and I roll my eyes as I go to my room.

I slam my bed room door and run over to my vanity where I put that bottle of anti-panic pills Dr. Carol had prescribed me. I open it quickly and take four before falling back against my pillows. I start thinking over what happened today. I can't stop thinking about it... I can't stop playing it over and over again in my mind. I'm such an idiot! God, what was I thinking? He must think I'm such a freak now and he'll never talk to me again. Do I even want to talk to him again? I did really like him... I hate this. I realize that I'm crying and that just makes me hate myself more.

"Stupid stupid stupid," I whisper to myself as I pull the covers over my head and punch my pillow into position. How will I ever face him again? My Mother comes to the door and knocks after a few moments of me balling like a baby, but I don't want to talk to anyone. "Go away," I snap hatefully.

She unlocks my door and she comes in anyways because she's annoying. I hide a bit more under my covers and refuse to come out as she sits down on the edge of my bed and pats my leg.

"Stop being so dramatic," she says and I scoff because she's the most dramatic woman I know. She's one to talk. I curl a little bit more into my own body and wipe my face, trying to get rid of any trace of tears just in case she decides to look.

She sighs loudly after a few moments before laying down beside me, her head heavy against my pillow as I make a small opening in my covers so I can having a breathing hole.

"You act like your father and I do things just to be mean to you," she says after a few moments of silence and I feel her hand squeeze my shoulder. "We just want what's best for you."

"I don't want to quit," I say, my voice muffled by the covers as I think about Folk Hills and the friends I've made. "I like working there."

"How about a compromise then?" she says. I pause a moment before slowly lowering the cover so I can see her. She sits up. "You don't have to quit right now," she says softly as she pushes the bangs out of my yes. "We'll cut back your hours, though," she adds, giving me a stern look. "And I want you to wear this," she says as she takes something from around her neck. It's a silver necklace with a sea shell charm dangling from the end and I sit up to get a better look. I can recall her wearing it since I was a child. "If something happens, god willing, then we'll be able to find you."

I take it with a frown and hold it towards the light so I can see the charm clearly. "It has a tracker on it?" I say, uncomfortable with the idea.

"It would really make us feel better," she nods her head. "Your brother and his friends… we don't know what's going on with them. They could be dead for all we know… I just need to know that you'll be okay," she says and then she gives me a little smile as she kisses my forehead. "You're our baby, Ginny. We need you to be safe."

"Are you going to check this all the time?" I ask worriedly and she gives me an odd look before smiling.

"Not unless we're concerned," she says and then she pinches my cheek. "But you never go anywhere you shouldn't."

Right…

I look down at the necklace and then to her. "Okay," I tell her as I put it around my neck. "It's a deal."

"Good," she smiles gently and then stands up, patting down her dress. "I made some lunch if you want to come down. I know you must be hungry."

"I am," I admit as I push back my covers and follow her down the stairs.

As we eat, we actually talk about things like we haven't done in a while. I told her about work, she told me about Mrs. Daniel's who lives down the road. She's one of my mother's only friends and they have a love/hate relationship based on competition and martial envy.

"What else can we talk about?" she muses out loud after she gets done telling me the story about how Mrs. Daniel's started a new sunflower corner in her summer garden. Fascinating stuff, really. She looks at me after taking a drink from her lemonade and she smiles. "Are you crushing on anyone?"

"Not really," I lie as I pick at my napkin. This is something I don't feel like talking about right now. "Boys are overrated anyways."

"Even Harry?" she asks carefully and I narrow my eyes.

"Especially Harry," I mutter under my breath as I think of Draco and she smiles a little.

"Perhaps that's best," she says as she stands up and picks up her empty plate to put in the sink. "You're young. Now is the time to be single and have fun."

Right, even though I'm never allowed to do anything.

An idea hits me, and I glance on her. "On that note," I say and she looks at me. "Can I go over to Luna's tonight?" I need to talk to her. I haven't talked to her in weeks and I must tell someone about the terrible thing that happened to me today.

That light and wonderful mood we seemed to have settled in leaves us and she looks uneasy. The peace treaty is about to be broken…. I can practically feel it.

"I don't know Ginny… you know her father doesn't have the best wards."

"How am I supposed to be single and have fun if I can't even leave the house?" I whisper dejectedly and I can practically feel her staring at me.

There's a long pause before she gives in.

"Oh, alright, then. But you have to be home by nine."

A real smile graces my face and I go to her and give her a hug around the waist. "Thanks," I say genuinely before running towards the fireplace.

"Be back by nine," she repeats as I take some floo powder from the pot.

"Nine. Got it," I reply as I throw the powder in and step inside, saying Luna's address.

I suppose it's a bit rude to come over unannounced, but with things being as they are with Luna and Theodore, I doubt I'd be able to get an answer out of her with a letter. I found her in a closet doing god knows what with him after all… I need to get to bottom of their relationship because I do not like him at all. He gives me the creeps and maybe I can get a her opinion on things as well. Luna always thinks outside of the box and I need that today.

The place is a wreck when I finally land in their fireplace and I stand there for a few moments just taking it in before making myself known.

Mr. Lovegood has taken to keeping a small printing press in his living room to print out the latest templates for the Quibbler magazine. He's in full printing press mode when I arrive.

"Hello Mr. Lovegood," I announce myself before I step through the grate so I don't seem too intrusive. "Is it okay if I come in?"

"Oh, Ginny," Mr. Lovegood looks at me from behind the big wooden beast of a machine. He has printers ink in his white hair and smudges on his cheeks. "Of course you can come in. How are you doing, girl?"

"I'm doing well," I tell him as I step around the stacks of Quibblers he has bundled around his living room, held together by twine.

"That is good!" he laughs as he presses something down and a few more pages pop out of the machine. I catch one before it magically lands in one of the neat stacks and I glance at the front page.

There's a picture of Harry. _Potter in Rome: Living at the Vatican._

"You think Harry is in Rome?" I ask carefully as I put the silly magazine on top of one of the neat stacks. I know to take everything in the Quibbler with a grain of salt, but I am worried about them… Harry, Ron, and Hermione, I mean. They could be in danger. Any news of them would be welcome.

"Think?" he repeats as he shuts his machine down and walks towards me as he wipes ink from his hands with a purple towel. "I know! I have an eye witness that says they spotted Potter having tea with the Pope."

"Why would Harry be having tea with the Pope?" I question and he smiles.

"Why indeed." He says with a serious head nod. "These are dark times indeed."

The Lovegoods are one of the only families that are outspoken about their belief in Harry and The Quibbler is one of the first major publications to support him when he said the Dark Lord was back… Of course, since it came from the Quibbler, it didn't exactly bring any reliable converts, but bless him for trying.

"...And as I recall the Pope is the president of a majority of muggles. He's probably trying to warn them of the impending war."

"The Pope isn't the president of muggles," I say and I almost laugh, actually. I took muggle studies last year so I know a thing or two about them. It's almost scary how uninformed most wizards and witches are on the subject. "He's the head of the Catholic…" I look at Mr. Lovegood as he stares at me with his wide eyes curious and wrinkled around the edges with age. "Never mind," I say because this could turn into a long discussion. "Is Luna home?"

"Oh, yes, of course," he says, shaking his head like he was lost in a fog for a moment. "She's in her room."

"I'm going to go see her, if you don't mind," I say as I start towards the stairs so I can see my friend.

"Not at all!" he calls after me as I put my hand on the railing and follow the cast iron stairs up to the second floor. "Tell her I said hello!"

I laugh a little to myself as I reach Luna's room. Her door is partially open so I peak inside to make sure she's decent. Luna is a painter, she has been for as long as I've known her and her room is full of brushes, jars of paint, and empty canvases. She paints her room about every other week as well during the summer holiday and right now it looks like she's going through an orange phase. Everything is bright orange with yellow dots of varying sizes. I almost wish I would have brought my sunglasses because it's so bright in here. I find Luna sitting on her bed reading from a sheet of parchment and I smile at her as I knock on the door frame.

"Hey there," I say when she sees me and I take a step in. "Your father says hello," I joke and she grins at me.

"Tell him I said hi," she answers and I snort in laughter as I close her door and walk towards her. I needed her company. I feel better already.

"I think you can handle that," I admit as I lean against the wall. "Just thought I'd drop in and see you," I tell her as she goes back to reading the parchment. "I feel like we haven't talked in a while... I have a lot to tell you."

"Hm," is all she says and I frown.

"I just thought we needed to talk since you know…" I say. She nods her head but doesn't look up and I make a face. "Since you were doing something with him in a closet of all places."

"A closet… yes…" she trails off like she wasn't even listening to me so I push off the wall and walk towards her.

"I have a lot to tell you," I tell her again, but she doesn't say anything. How rude. "Luna, I'm talking to you," I say as I wave my hand in front of her face. She blinks a few times and finally glances up from the parchment. "I feel like you're not paying attention to me," I say sarcastically and she gives me a silly grin before folding the parchment up and placing it under her pillow. "What do you keep reading anyways?" I ask as I sit down beside her.

"Just a love poem."

She says that so seriously I can hardly laugh at her for it.

"A love poem?" I repeat, trying not to sound like I was making fun of her.

"Yes," she says with a light head bob as she looks out into space with a stupid smile on her face. She doesn't elaborate further and I furrow my brows.

"Did Theo write you a love poem?" I ask flatly. I kind of feel like throwing up actually and I can't keep my disgusted face at bay when she nods her head. "He wrote you a poem?" I repeat again and I watch her back as she stands up and walks over to her window.

"Does Draco write you love poems?" she asks dreamily and I snort. She glances at me over her shoulder and raises her eyebrows. "Does he?"

"No," I say slowly with a laugh. "Draco does not write me love poems." I couldn't even begin to imagine what his would even say if he did. I actually shudder to think.

It gives me chills.

"Would you like to read it?" she asks and she blinks her big eyes a few times.

"Would I like to read your love poem?" I ask and she presses her lips together.

"Why do you have to say it like that?" she asks as she walks back to her bed and pulls out the parchment. "You say 'love poem' like it's a terrible disease."

"Love poems are terrible diseases," I tell her as she unfolds it with careful fingers. "I have yet to read one that wasn't cringe worthy or just ridiculous."

She looks hurt for a moment and she hesitates handing it to me. I feel guilty for my harsh words and I try to make up for it. "I'm sure it's lovely," I say seriously as I take the paper from her. "I'm sure Theo has a way with words… and rhyming," I say tiredly as I look down at the well worn page. No doubt Luna has read this a million times a day since she got it.

It's hand written in scratchy calligraphy on yellowing paper and I have to squint to read it because the hand writing is so bad. "I've never had a poem written about me before," she says as she sighs wistfully. I frown deeper as I read each line. "He says I have hair spun of gold," she says as she takes a strand of her own hair and stares at it as she spins it around her finger…. Staring at it like she had never realized she had blond hair before. "And eyes as deep as the ocean."

"He wrote this?" I say skeptically. It's not the juvenile love fest I was expecting… it actually wasn't so bad considering I've read it before in one of my books.

"Of course he did. He tells me I'm his muse," she says. I fold the paper back up and I itch my head as I try to decide my next course of action. I want to tell her that Theo didn't actually write this poem about her. Instead it's a poem written by a madman about his dog from a book that came out a few years ago.

I'm not sure if Theo knew that, of course. He might have been looking up poems and thought this one was nice… perhaps he was trying to impress Luna, letting her think he wrote it. I look at Luna again as she rereads the poem that she thinks is about her. But then…. He could be a slimy creep that knows very well that is a poem about a dog and he's a having a laugh about it right now.

"You like Theo a lot?" I ask even though it's pretty damn obvious.

She has I heart Theo written on her wall over there in red lip stick.

"I do…" she says. "It is a good feeling. I've never had a boyfriend before."

"I know," I sigh as I glance at the letter in her hands. "Did you have sex with him?" I ask carefully and she pauses for a second before sitting down beside me.

"No," she says with a head shake. "But we're doing other stuff. I didn't know things could…" she trails off and then she smiles at me. "I like having a boyfriend."

"Do you think he's genuine in his affections?" I ask, looking at the letter again.

"Do you believe Draco Malfoy is?" she counters back and I bite the corner of my lip.

"I don't know," I answer honestly.

"And that's half the fun, isn't it?" she says dreamily and I shake my head.

"That's not fun at all," I mutter, but she doesn't hear me as she stands back up and walks over to her closet. "I wanted to talk to you..." I tell her as I think about the stupid thing I did this morning... "I made such a fool..."

"He's taking me out tonight," she interrupts and I snap my mouth shut in surprise as she grabs a yellow dress from it's hanger. "To some kind of show in the Willow Park. Doesn't that sound romantic?"

"Oh, I thought…" I stand up with disappointment settling in me. I let her rudeness slide and bite the corner of my lip. "I thought maybe we could hang out tonight or something. I thought we could talk."

"Oh," she says and then she looks at me like she was feeling guilty. "You should have written me. I made plans."

"You're right," I say awkwardly. I never thought I'd see the day Luna would ditch me for a boy. It kind of hurts, to be honest. "What time is he coming?" She seems happy, I don't want to bring her down with me.

"Well," she says as she starts brushing out her hair. "In about…." She checks the clock on the table. "Now."

"Luna!" Her father calls from downstairs and I jump. "That Theodore gentleman is at the door for you."

Luna looks at me. "You can come with us of course," she says as she slinks into the yellow dress . "It will be fun."

"No, I think that I would just be the third wheel."

"Yes," she says thoughtfully. "I imagine you would be."

Yeah... She wasn't even joking.

"Yeah, so... I guess I'll just go then?" I say, hoping this isn't actually happening this way.

"Bye Ginny," she says as she starts out the door.

I follow behind her, resisting the urge to pull her hair as we walk down the stairs together. I can't believe this is happening.

Theo is standing awkwardly at the foot of the stairs and for some reason I can't help but glare at him. He notices and smirks.

Jerk.

And then they leave. They really leave together and I'm left standing in the living room with Luna's freaking father.

"So, Ginny," he says and I give him an odd look because I'm still trying to process being ditch so heartlessly from Luna of all people. "Would you like some tea?"

"No," I say seriously. "I do not want any tea."

I go back home them, giving my Mom a tense wave before going back to my room and falling back on my bed, punching my pillow back into position with a little more force than necessary.

Perhaps going to Luna's was successful. I'm not longer upset about the whole Draco incident from this morning... Now I can't stop thinking about how angry I am with Luna.

Mission accomplished... I guess.

* * *

"And then she said that Stephan was only talking to her because he wanted to know more about Richard... But I'm not hundred percent sure that Stephan is gay... He does really like the color pink, though," Daphne says thoughtfully as she sits on the counter of my little check out area while filing her nails. "But pink is a very in color for stylish men right now and Stephan is very in tune with fashion."

"Who's Stephan?" I ask as I try to keep up with the conversation while straightening the things around the lockers because, unlike Daphne Greengrass, I actually have a paying job.

"Stephan Stabler of course," she says with a scoff like I was an idiot. "If you ask me," she says as she hops off the counter and leans her elbows against the top so she's facing me. "I think she's just bitter that Stephan didn't want to sleep with her."

I don't know what girl we're talking about, to be honest. I stopped listening a while ago.

"I don't know who would want to, actually. After she got those lip injections, she looks like a duck."

I snort in laughter and shake my head as I walk back towards her. "Don't you have something better to do?" I ask her with a smile. "I am working, you know."

She shrugs a delicate shoulder and she gathers a section of her honey blond hair so she can twirl it around a well manicured finger. "Pans went to Bermuda this week with her father and Millicent is a bitch, so I thought you could be my new bestie for the day."

"Joy for me," I say sarcastically and she rolls her eyes.

"Don't be a whore, Ginny. It's a good thing to be my best friend. You get the perks of my undivided attention and pleasurable company."

"If you say so," I joke with a smile and she smirks at me before talking about gay Stephan and the girl he slighted.

"And then she told me that she had tried to have sex with him at a party but he..." I tune her out as she keeps going and play with the blue ribbon around my wrist.

She hasn't mentioned anything about Draco and that whole fainting episode so I'm guessing Draco didn't tell anyone. A part of me is grateful for that. To be honest, I was a little nervous to come back to Folk Hills because I thought everyone would know what a freak I was and they'd all be talking about me from behind my back, but that doesn't seem true.

I make a face as I think about other people knowing about what a weird-o I am and Daphne catches it, thinking I'm listening to her story.

"Don't be bitter, Ginny. It's unflattering," she says and I smirk at her before straightening my spine when I see someone approach. When I realize that it's Roy, the manager of the pool, I let my shoulders slump a bit. He's not worth my fake niceness.

"Hello there, lovely ladies," he says with a cheesy grin.

Roy is over thirty with suntanned skin and shaggy brown hair that he wears in a surfer style that isn't appropriate for his advanced age. He's wearing swim trunks and a tank top, the usual life guard gear, and he's looking at Daphne like she was a dessert cake. Ew. I look at Daphne to see her reaction at being eyed by a loser like him. She's looking at him in the same disgusting way. I blink a few confused moments as he slithers up beside her and then I remember the night at Pansy's where we played never have I ever and she admitted to having a certain kind of 'back door' sex with Roy the 'pool boy'. I'm officially grossed out.

"You're looking nice today," she says as she reaches out and squeezes his bicep. "Muscles are looking good."

"I always look good," he flirts back with a grin as he flexes his arm. "Not as good as you though, sexy."

I think I threw up a little in my mouth.

"I'm standing right here," I point out and when they both spare me a glance, I wave. "Take this somewhere else, please. I just ate lunch."

"Oh, Ginny, don't be silly," Daphne giggles like a school girl and I cringe at the sound. She is flirting so hardcore with him right now.

"Can I do something for you, Roy?" I ask with an eyebrow raised. He had to have come back to this little hallway for a reason other than Daphne.

"I was just taking a walk," he says as he takes the whistle from his pocket and swirls it around with his fingers. "They closed the pool, so I have some down time. Thought I'd come and find my favorite little lady," he says with a wink towards Daphne.

Ugh.

"Why did they close the pool?" I ask seriously. "It's noon on a Wednesday." The pool is always packed with rich people and their children, especially in the afternoon when the day is at its hottest.

He shrugs his shoulders. "I have no idea why they do half the stuff they do here," he says as Daphne takes the whistle from him and puts it over her head so the whistle part is nestled between her breasts. Of course, that's where his eyes stay and I make a face. "Rich people," he says with a head shake and Daphne raises an eyebrow.

"What does that mean?"

"I was just saying that you're all crazy, that's all," he adds with a smile and she pretends to be insulted.

"Well, if that's how you feel, then I don't know if we should be friends anymore," she coos as she bats her eyelashes at him.

"Who said we were friends?" he asks as he wiggles his brows.

Oh, dear lord.

"Not me," she jokes with a charming smile and she leans in closer. "In fact, I barely even like you."

He puts his hand on his chest. "Oh, you're breaking my heart, darling."

"Ginevra," I raise my brows in surprise at Del. When did she show up? Daphne and Roy part ways to let her through and she gives Roy a disdainful look before facing me again. "You can go home now."

"But my shift isn't over until three," I point out with a confused tilt to my head as I glance at the clock.

"Yes, I am aware," she says as she gives another sideways glance to Roy who is looking uncomfortable. "But Nadia is coming in, so I thought you would like the rest of the afternoon off."

"Um..." I'm a little confused and I send a look to Daphne as she raises her brows. "Am I in trouble?" I ask carefully and she shakes her head.

"Of course not," she says. "Now, go home and you," she gives Roy a stern look. "Go do something worthwhile or you will be in trouble."

Roy blushes and Daphne hides a smile as he scatters away. I furrow my brows as I start gathering my things to place in my backpack. Del comes behind the counter, I guess to watch the place until Nadia gets here, and I send her another confused look before leaving the small room with Daphne hot on my heels.

"That was odd," she points out as I hike my bag over my shoulder and nod my head. "What are you doing now?"

"Going home, I guess," I say uncomfortably. My mom usually picks me up but she won't be here until three so I guess I'll just have to survive going home on my own.

"We could hang out for a little bit," she says, following me down the hallways like a lost puppy dog. "There's still a lot I have to tell you about the Stephan and Richard scandal."

"Um, no, not today," I say because I don't care about that. "I should get home. My Mom would freak out if she found out that I got off early and didn't come straight home."

"Oh, well..." she stops walking and trails off. "I guess... I guess I'll go find something else to do then."

"See you," I say to her disappointed face as I continue walking down the back hallway towards the employee exit. I only feel a little bit bad about that because I'm still impossibly confused by what just happened with Delsia. Why did she send me home so early? She said I wasn't in trouble and if I was she would address it right away, right? What the hell?

I squint against the sun as I open the back door and I start walking down the concrete sidewalk as I dig through my bag for my sunglasses. Today is impossibly humid and I can practically feel my hair frizzing up and my skin burning as the sun shines down from above. Stupid sun and my stupid pale skin.

Why can't I find these damn glasses? I'm too focused on getting my glasses that I don't even bother to acknowledge the other person on the side walk as well.

"You've been successfully avoiding me and all of my owls."

I gasp when Draco slides in front of me and blocks my path. I glance up at him and blink for a few panicked seconds before calming my heart. I drop my bag and pick it up quickly, hoping he doesn't notice what fool I'm being.

"What?" I manage to get out through my surprise. He's wearing thick black rimmed sunglasses and I can see my reflection in them. I look stupid squinting my face up like it is, so I try to smooth out my expression.

"You've been avoiding me," he repeats as he takes my hand. I'm far too confused right now to protest as he starts steering me in the opposite direction from where I was headed. "I don't like that."

"I haven't been avoiding you," I half lie. "You know where I work."

"Obviously," he scoffs as we walk into one of the side doors, leading back into the club. A few high profile members of Folk Hills pass us and I blush and look away, fully aware that they saw me and Draco Malfoy holding hands.

"Where are we going?" I ask and then I shake my head as I pull my hand back. "Wait, I have to go home."

"Why?" he asks as he continues to walk. I follow because half of me is curious as to what is going on here and the other half is pleased that he doesn't hate me for fainting at his home.

"Because..." Why? "Because my Mom is probably waiting for me. She always picks me up from work." I answer and he glances at me over his shoulder before walking towards a set of thick wooden doors. I've never gone any further than the main hall here, and beyond the wooden doors is something totally new to me.

"You got off work like two hours early," he replies as he holds the door open for me. I step ahead of him and look around. The sidewalks are made of bricks and the garden is beautiful with different exotic flowers and large greenery all over the place in a well orchestrated landscape. The brick lined walk way separates towards three large archways. I can see the tennis courts and Quidditch club out in the distance and a few other red roofed buildings that hold special meetings are scattered along the grounds as well.

"How do you know I got off early?" I ask suspiciously as he puts his hand on the small of my back to lead me along. "Wait," I say as I stop walking. "Where are you taking me?"

"You're going to ruin the surprise," he says and I narrow my eyes.

"I hate surprises," I say just so he'll at least give me a hint.

"You're no fun," he says with a sly smirk as he takes something out of his messenger bag. I didn't even notice that he had one. He takes out a purple box and he hands it to me as I give him a look.

"What is this?"

"You can answer your own question by opening it," he says like I was stupid and I give him another angry look before pulling the lid off. Inside is a swim suit. A red one piece suit. I'm almost disappointed.

"I already own a swim suit," I say and he raises an eyebrow as he lifts his glasses until they rest on the top of his head.

"I'm sure you do, but you didn't bring it with you and I'm going to teach you how to swim today."

"What?" I say with a level voice as I look up to him with my brows furrowed.

"Look, the last time we were around each other things got a little heavy," he admits and my cheeks blush in shame when I remember why. And then I remember who he is and whose son he is and why I freaking fainted like a fool. I harden my eyes and glance at him again.

"I should go home."

"No," he says like it was a stupid thing for me to say and I narrow my eyes.

"I'm sorry, Draco," I tell him as I put the lid back on the swim suit box. I hand it back to him and he furrows his brows. "I don't think this is going to work."

"I can get you a different suit if you want," he says and I sigh. "I didn't want to get anything too revealing because I didn't want you to think I was a pervert."

"It's not about the swim suit," I admit. I need to be strong. This is definitely the right thing to do... right? "I don't think it's a good idea for us to see each other anymore." I say softly.

"What?" he questions sharply and I try to tread carefully. I don't want to hurt his feelings when mine are already confused and hurting as well. I guess I have been avoiding him because I knew this conversation would have to happen.

"Just with you being who you are and me… being well, me… I'm just not sure if this is a good match."

"Are you kidding me?" he asks flatly. I shake my head as I hike up my bag again and cross my arms. "That's not fair, Ginny," he says with narrowed eyes. "Why? That can't be your only reason."

"It's not," I admit.

"Do you not like me?"

"No, I like you," I say quickly and he raises an eyebrow. "I just…. We're two different people," I say, putting my hand outs. "It's a bad time right now," I say slowly, trying to figure out exactly what I want to say and how I want to say it. I'm not sure if I want to say it at all, if I was being honest. "And there's a reason why I'm afraid of your father. I don't have to tell you why, but there is a reason and I don't think it's a good idea for us to continue this," I say as I gesture in-between us.

"I know why you're afraid of my father," he says sharply and now it's my turn to raise my brow.

"You do?" I state skeptically because I know he has no idea and he nods his head. A large woman with a diamond necklace on walks by us, and we both pause until she's out of hearing range.

"Of course I do," he continues in a quiet voice. "He was questioned by the Aurors because of it. He didn't know what that book could do, Ginny. He had no idea it would open the Chamber of secrets."

"If he didn't know," I hiss, angry that he knew and never said anything. How many others know? "Then why did he give it to me?" I was an eleven year old girl for Christ's sakes.

"The Aurors thought we had dark artifacts in our house. We were on a list and they were doing random searches," he says and I clench my fists. "My father knew that the object was dark so he needed to get rid of it. I know it's childish, but he thought if he gave if to your family, then your father would get in trouble for it because it was your father who reported him."

"He didn't give it to my father!" I yell and then I look around to quickly to see if anyone saw my outburst. "He gave it to me and it nearly killed me."

"He didn't know," he says firmly. "But that's his mistake, not mine. I'm not my father."

"It doesn't matter," I say with a head shake. "This whole thing is just a terrible idea."

"You didn't seem to mind when I was fingering you the other day," he spits out hatefully and my cheeks heat up in embarrassment. I can't believe he just said that. "In fact, you seemed to thoroughly enjoy my company at that particular time."

"You're a bastard," I tell him scornfully and he clenches a fist. I see it and narrow my eyes. "I'm going home now. Don't bother sending me any more owls," I tell him and he grabs my arm when I try to walk away.

"Why are you being this way?" he asks and then he looks over my face. "I thought you were a different kind of person than this."

"What does that mean?" I snap back and he shakes his head and takes a step back.

"I am not my father," he states seriously. "And your family doesn't define who you are either. If you can walk away from me now and claim that you'll never think of me, then fine, do it. But if you actually want see the potential in this like I do, then you should stay and let me fucking do what I planned to do today."

I don't say anything. I don't move as I process his words and he clenches his jaw.

"You're rejecting me," he says, rolling the words around like it was something he wasn't used to... I guess that's legit. "That's it, then? You're just going to run away from this like a coward?"

Coward.

It's probably the worst thing you could call a Gryffindor.

"I'm not being a coward," I hiss at him. "I'm being practical."

"No, you're not," he says. "This is you just being fucking scared."

"I'm not scared!" I say as I stomp my foot. That's a lie, perhaps I am a bit afraid, but I won't let him know that.

"Tell me why you don't want to be with me again."

He says that like he already knows he's right and I make a face. Again, I'm tongue tied, so I don't say a word for a few long moments. He runs his hands over his face and shakes his head with a long sigh.

"I'm not doing this the way I wanted to," he admits softly and then he looks at me again. "I don't want to fight with you, and I don't want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with me," he says and I chew on my lip. "Could you at least give it a try? We'll sort through all the heavy stuff later, lets just keep it light right now, yeah?"

He holds out his hand.

I look at it and chew on my lip a bit more as he raises his eyebrows.

"Ginny," he says after a few moments as more people walk past us. "You're making me look stupid. Take my damn hand or walk away," he says with a tight voice.

I look at him, I _really_ look at him and I'm struck by how good looking he is. The sun his hitting his gray eyes just right making them shine silver and his hair is falling casually over his brows in such an appealing way. He's handsome, but Tom was handsome too... But there's something else in Draco's expression, an openness that Tom never had.

I've never had someone pursue me the way Draco has and I've never had someone seem to like me as much as he does. I wasted so much time liking someone that never liked me and maybe it's time to move past what's safe and take a chance. Yeah, maybe it is.

I take his hand.

A handsome smile breaks out across his face and I inhale a long breath.

"Are you really going to try to teach me how to swim?" I ask to break the silence and he smirks as he leans in and places a gentle kiss against my lips that makes my heart hammer. Yes, this was a good decision.

"Of course," he says as he takes my hand and starts pulling me down the path to the right. "Its about time that you learned how."

"Right," I whisper to his back.

The pool is amazing... it's actually three pools if we wanted to get technical. The main pool is large with stone linings and a mosaic decorating the floor under the water. Connected to it, separated only by a small wall, is a small heated children's pool that's only a couple feet deep and there are toys floating in it for the kids to play with. There's a large wooden stairway leading up to a second floor where another large pool is that has a connecting slide to the main pool. It's quit beautiful actually.

I guess I can appreciate being spontaneous, and as I'm putting on that red one piece suit in the changing rooms, I think about what he said... about me being off a couple hours early...and that the pool we're currently using is closed. He had the keys to get into it, assuring me that it was okay.

"Hey, Draco," I say, trying to keep it light as I shimmy into the tight material.

"Yeah?" he asks from the other side of the door.

"Did you...Did you make them close the pool for this?" I ask carefully and I hear him laugh.

"Yes," he says and I furrow my brows as I pull the straps up over my breasts. "And before you ask... yes, I did request that they let you go from your shift early."

Once I'm secure in the swimsuit, and I'm sufficiently covered with a towel wrapped around me, I open the door. "How can you do those things?" I ask, worried about my job. What if I get fired because Draco is making odd demands? What would people think of me?

"You know that my Grandfather owns over half this place," he says with a cocky tilt to his head. He takes off his t-shirt, leaving him in blue swim trunks as he walks towards the water. "I can do what I want," he says like the arrogant little rich boy that he sometimes is. "And, as my girlfriend, you get to reap those rewards."

"I'm not your girlfriend," I point out as after he jumps into the water and reemerges. We haven't had that talk yet.

"Says who?" he asks as he slicks back his wet hair. I take tentative steps towards the large, lavish base pool and I glance at the small children's pool on the right side of me. There are sea creatures and sea shells painted on the floor.

"All my other boyfriends," I tease when I look at him again, he raises an eyebrow.

"Boyfriends?" he questions as I stall time from getting in the pool. I'm actually a bit insecure to be around him in a bathing suit. Even a modest one piece like this one. "How many do you have?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?"

"I would actually," he says, sounding a bit more serious than he did before. I laugh it off until he swims towards me. "Alright, now, off with the towel. It's time to get in."

"Okay..." I say slowly, talking myself into being brave. "I'm going to start at the shallow end," I say, pointing towards the other side of the pool where the stairs lead into the water.

I take a step in, the water comes up to my ankles, but I don't feel comfortable enough to remove the towel. I glance at Draco, he's standing in the pool where the water hits his chest and he's staring at me.

"Look away," I say say seriously.

"Why?" he asks with a brow raised like the pompous thing that he is.

"Just look away."

"I'm not going to," he counters as he starts heading towards the shallow end of the pool. Of course, his body is flawless so he has nothing to be ashamed of. He watches me the whole time as he gets to the shallow end and then he starts walking up the stares to get to me. He's all wet and the water is making his body glisten

Do not look at his stomach.

Do not look at his stomach.

"Why are you looking at my stomach?" he asks and I flick my eyes to his because my whole 'not looking at his ab muscles like a creeper' didn't seem to work out.

"No," I say quickly as he looks down at his stomach like he might have something on it. "I mean, I'm not."

"Right," he says as he takes the final step up so we're face to face. I tile my head up to look at him and he smiles as he brings his hands to the towel. "You can't swim in a towel," he says as he takes it off and throws it behind me, leaving me in the swim suit. I want to cross my arms. "That's the first lesson."

"Point taken," I say softly. I feel cold suddenly, cold and warm at the same time and when he puts his hand on my waist to lead me in a more intimate way into the water, I think I may have gasped.

"Look at you being all jumpy," he smirks as he walks me in until the water is up to my stomach. "Are you ready for this?" he asks, his face almost looking boy like as he smiles.

"Are we really doing this?" I ask, as I sink down in the water further so my it's up to my neck and my body is hidden. I dunk my head back to get my hair wet because the sun is so hot and I want something to do other than just staring at him. "Can't we just kind of... kick it?"

He laughs. "Kick it?" he asks with a smile. I like him like this. Maybe he was right. This could work. "What does that even mean?"

I push myself backwards in the water and smirk at him.

"Can't we just play?" To be honest, I really don't want to learn how to swim. There's a reason why I don't actually swim and he knows that.

"Play?" he says as he swims after me. I'm walking, he's actually swimming, so he reaches me in no time. I dodge him, though. "I don't play."

"That's a shame," I tell him as I go to the edge of the pool, acting like I'm going to pull myself out. "I guess I should just leave then.

I scream when he grips me around the waist and throws me back into the water. I make a big splash and instead of panicking when I get under water, I find myself laughing on my way up.

"Draco!" I scold as I blink water out of my eyes. "You could have killed me!"

"Hardly," he says back with a laugh.

I go over to him and try to dunk him, but of course that doesn't work and we wrestle around until I finally get him under the water with a triumphant smile. We spent the rest of the afternoon playing and joking around in the pool. It was really nice and I was having a lot of fun. I even went to the pool on the second floor and used the slide. I felt like a child again. I even found myself liking him more as we horsed around because he was being so different from the Draco Malfoy I had always knew and imagined. It was nice seeing him laugh and have fun as well.

"You're killing me," he says after a while and I try to catch my breath by leaning against the edge of the pool with my arms resting against he cement. He swims up behind me and presses his body against mine so his chest is against my back. "We've been messing around all this time and you haven't tried to kiss me once," he says against my ear.

I shiver but brush it off as I turn around to face him, letting his hips press against mine. That light mood is gone and something much more adult and intimate over takes the situation. I'm so attracted to him and when he's close like this... it makes me feel so much older than I am and it's a good mature feeling. I can forget who his father is, what I've been through, and what everyone else would think. I could make this work if it felt like this all the time.

"What makes you think I want to kiss you?" I question and he smirks as he puts his hands on either side of me, pinning me against the pool wall. "Do you..." I lick my lips because I'm about to say something serious and uncomfortable. "Do you think I'm crazy or something after what happened at you place... when I... you know."

He kisses the corner of my mouth. "If you're crazy, then I'm sure I could be classified that way as well."

"But do _you_ think that?" I ask because a part of me really would hate it if he thought terrible things about me.

"No," he says seriously and the way he said it... I believe him. "No, I don't."

"Good," I say with a head nod. "That's good..."

"Besides," he says as he presses his hips into mine a little firmer. "My therapist says I have control issues and that I'm too narcissistic to be too empathetic towards other people and their problems, so I probably wouldn't notice anyways," he jokes and I smile.

"My therapist says I'm too altruistic and not assertive enough," I admit that little part of myself in the guise of a joke.

"We just might be perfect for each other," he says and I smile again.

"I don't know about that," I reply and he smirks.

"Well..." he says, but he doesn't continue because I actually lean up and kiss him.

How brave I'm getting.

"Hmm..." I hear him say against my lips before he deepens the kiss with a vengeance, pushing his body into mine until it's almost painful, but his weight against my body feels too good to ask him to stop.

I bring my arms up to his shoulders, and I lock my hands behind his neck as our tongues slide against each other. He tastes like some kind of fruit. I think I like it. "You know," he says as he pulls back to place gentle kisses against my neck. I smile like an idiot. "I think I like this swim suit," he says as he runs his fingers along the thick straps on my shoulders. "It leaves more to the imagination."

"Yeah?" is all I come up with because I'm awesome like that.

"Yeah," he says as he nips at my neck. It tickles and I laugh. "Makes me want to take it off," he says as he starts lowering the straps.

This is dangerous.

"People will see," I say as I stop his hands. He pulls back in disappointment as I fix the straps and I look around just to make sure no one is watching.

"There is no one here," he says as he goes down for another kiss.

"Uh, Ginny?" Draco snaps his head to that voice and so do I. My cheeks heat up in embarrassment when I notice Dean Thomas standing at the other side of the pool, looking uncomfortable in his regular life guarding attire.

"What do you want?" Draco hisses at him as I scoot away and right my swimsuit for the millionth time.

"Uh, well..." Dean blinks a few times like he wasn't sure he was actually seeing what was happening just now. He itches his head and the yellow ribbon showing his blood status is bright against his darker skin tone. "I mean, they sent me because... well... Ginny," he looks at me like he's never seen me before. "Your Mom is waiting for you and they told me to come find you..."

"My Mom?" I say with a dry throat. "Jesus, has it been two hours already?" I say in panic as I climb out of the pool and I grab my towel. "I need to get changed," I mumble to myself as I run to the pool house to get into my clothes.

I move fast and get dressed in record time, throwing my bag over my shoulder as I run out of the changing room. Draco is out of the pool and Dean is gone when I finally leave.

"Where did he go?" I ask as I start speed walking away from the pool, stuffing the wet swim suit in my bag as I move. Draco keeps up with my strides easily and he casually puts on his shirt like this wasn't a big deal.

"He left, obviously," he sneers like he was pissed off. I spare him an irritated glance.

"God, what if he tells my parents, or my brother?"

"Tell them what?" he asks as we head down the brick walk way.

"That I was freaking snogging you in a pool," I say in exasperation.

"You say that like it's a bad thing," he says with a smug voice and I glare at him. When we reach that garden, and those large double doors, I stop and stare at him. "You stay here," I tell him because I have no idea where my Mom will be waiting and heaven forbid she sees him with me.

"Why-"

I open the door and close it before he can get that sentence out.

My Mom is waiting for me at my usual spot with one of the managers from the desk and she looks impatient. "Where have you been?" she asks as I approach. "I've been waiting for half an hour... and why is your hair wet?"

I touch my hair and mentally scold myself for the slip. "Uh, I'm sorry. I was doing... something..."

That was the best lie I could come up with and she accepted it because she didn't question me further. When we get home, I go to my room and stare at myself in the mirror, trying to see what Draco sees when he looks at me. My parents talk to me during dinner, urging me to go to more therapy sessions with Dr. Carol and I finally relent after my mother starts crying about 'her children and how she has failed to protect them'... blah blah blah. Emotional manipulation is what that is, really, but I agree to go none the less.

After I take a shower for the night, I look at my unclothed self in my mirror again, trying to see myself through different eyes.

What does he see in me?

I can't dwell on the question, because I don't think I could find the answer. Draco does make me feel special, and I don't want change that... not when things are good again... kind of.

As soon as I close my eyes and fall asleep I wake in a dream.

I'm sitting at the head of a large dark table, in a large dark hall, surrounded by corpses as dinner guests. I've been here before. In my dreams when I was a girl...It was a nightmare...

In the dream I am not afraid of them and I'm not disgusted, I just keep eating my dinner in a beautiful red ballgown like I couldn't be happier. The people, they're dead with rotting flesh and lips sown together with black thread making an all together disturbing imagine and before them are plates of rotting food, infested with maggots and flies. I look at them like they were old friends and go back to my meal. They're propped up in the seats surrounding the table, dressed in tuxedos and extravagant dresses with their eyes open and staring dead eyed into space.

"My love."

I look at the end of the table, but instead of Tom being there, like he usually is, it's someone else. Draco's sitting in the chair, wearing a well tailored black suit with a smirk on his face. He's not dead, and his mouth isn't sown with thread. When did he get here?

I smile at him.

He smiles at me and raises his wine glass.

The corpse beside me slumps forward, his face landing in the pea green soup in front of him. It splashes and Draco and I laugh.

Like all dreams, things don't move the same as they do in real life and I find Draco standing in front of me, looking down at me with a fire in his eyes. The dead people are still at the table, still being dead behind him.

I hear a hissing noise and the slithering of a large being moving through the hallways. I recognize that noise and I see the Basilisk move out of the corner of my eyes, coiling it's large snake body around the room like a predator.

"Ginny."

Draco grabs my hair and pulls me out of the chair. Again, I am not afraid... in fact... I'm feeling something else all together and I know this is going to turn into one of _those_ dreams.

"Is Tom here?" I find myself asking. I don't know why I asked. I never know why I ask.

"No," is all Draco says as he picks me up and spins around. "You're not his anymore."

With a strength I didn't know he had, he throws me on the table, with the rotting food and our rotting guests as our witnesses. He crawls on top of me and hikes up the the skirt of my dress as he bites my neck so hard it bleeds.

Instead of asking him to stop like a sensible person, my dream self said one very bad word.

"Harder."

That seems to be the only word I could say after that as he tore my clothes and pressed harsh kisses against my lips.

"Harder."

He unbuckled his belt as our dead guests started moaning and he pulled my hair again when he kissed me.

"Harder."

He tears my knickers and throws them before pushing down his trousers. They land on one of the dead people.

"Harder."

He bites his way down to my breasts, leaving teeth marks and blood in his wake.

"Harder."

He finally slams inside of me and I scream.

"Harder!"

I wake with a start.

I'm breathing heavy and I wipe my forehead off as I glance at my clock that's glowing against the darkness of my room. It's three in the morning. I'm in a cold, shaking sweat and I have a very uncomfortable wetness between my legs.

I've had that dream before, only with Tom and there was no weird sex like that... and... when I had it as a girl it was a nightmare... A terrible nightmare that I never wanted to have ever again. I look under the covers at my knickers and I make a face.

This was the first time that I had liked it.

I am going crazy.

* * *

I play with that stupid sea shell necklace I promised my mother I'd wear. I'm not totally sure why I'm wearing it, to be honest. I did sneak out and if she chose to find me, she easily could and she would know that I'm not currently in my room, writing and listening to music like I had made her believe. I look at the group of people I'm here with through suspicious eyes. Daphne, Millicent, Pansy, Draco, Blaise, and a few other Slytherin upperclassmen are standing out side of the Falcon's Quidditch stadium, waiting to go inside. I suppose a part of me still feels a little unsafe in this group.

Millicent feels me staring and she sneers at me.

She especially makes me uncomfortable.

"What do you think, babe?" That's Draco's voice and I glance at him. Is he really calling me that in front of everyone? It makes me blush.

"Yeah?" I ask uncomfortably as I remember the fucked up sex dream I had about him.

"Haven't you been listening?" he asks and when I shake my head, he sighs. "Do you want to go out after the game?"

"Go out where?" I ask. The longer I'm away from home, the higher the risk of my parents finding out that I'm gone.

"Herme's of course," Pansy cuts in. She has a nice tan from her week in Bermuda and I'm envious of it. I don't tan no matter how long I roast in the sun. I just get burned, get some more freckles, and then go right back to being pale. "It's an 'everything goes but clothes' night."

"What does that mean?" I ask with a frown and they all laugh at me like I was a puppy doing something adorable. That's annoying.

"Looks like you're going to find out," Blaise says with a devilish smirk. "Can't deny her that first experience, Malfoy." he says with a wink towards Draco.

"We'll see, then," Draco says in an affirmative voice.

The line finally moves and we make our way inside. Of course, with the group that I find myself in our seats are the best and we're surrounded by people of influence. Most of them are from the Ministry that I recognize from the papers. Draco knows them all and spends most of the opening show talking to them about bills at the ministry and shaking hands. The Falcons are playing the Warlocks so I know it's going to be a decent game so I settle in my seat as Draco continues to speak to the wizard behind us about taxes. When the game finally starts and the teams appear, I try to tune out the mindless chatter of Pansy and Daphne and focus on the game but they make it so damn hard.

"And instead, I bought the green dress..."

"Green would go good with your hair..."

"...I thought so..."

"Ivy said..."

"...I agree...What a bitch..."

Blah freaking blah.

"I'm going to get something to eat," I say as I stand up. I need to walk away from them before I tell them to shut up. I guess I'm in an edgy mood.

"Do you want me to go with you?" Draco asks, his eyes firmly planted on the match.

"I think I can handle it," I tell him as I start to walk past him so I can get to the aisle, but he grabs my wrist.

"Here," he says as he fishes into his pocket and then he hands me some money.

Really?

"I have money," I mutter because the others are looking at us now.

Instead of responding, he just waves me off and goes back to the game. I clench my jaw and narrow my eyes at him. He doesn't notice, but Blaise does and I catch him smirking at me from the corner of my eyes. I huff and leave the seating area, headed towards the concession stands. I still have Draco's coins clutched in my hand and I glare down at them before stuffing them in my pocket. What a pompous jerk.

I think I'm just in a terrible mood today.

There's quite a line for food and I plant myself at the end of it, waiting impatiently with my arms crossed and my toe tapping against the concrete floor as Quidditch fans chatter on around me. When the line moves forward, I tuck some hair behind my ear and take a step... but then something brushes against me.

I furrow my brows and look around to see who just touched me. No one was walking by and there's no one in line behind me. As I'm looking around, I see a set of feet walking away... just feet, no body.

Invisibility cloak.

You have got to be kidding me.

I only know one person who has one of those and I forget my attempt at getting food as I follow after the feet. The shoes are scuffed up black converse with a frayed shoe lace on the right foot.

I know those shoes.

Harry.

I pick up my pace and weave my way around people, trying to keep my eye on the shoes. Harry had gotten taller this past year and I guess he didn't really take into consideration that his cloak wouldn't cover him half as well. What is he doing here? Why is he at a game when he's supposed to be off saving the world while ignoring everyone that loves him like it was his job?

"Harry!" I call just to make him stop and possibly talk to me. Maybe he can tell me that my brother and Hermione are safe. Maybe he'll apologize for leaving on my birthday.

The shoes pick up pace and start moving faster... he's running... What a bastard! I start running faster and I follow the feet all the way towards the gate where I'm stopped by a burly security guard.

"If you leave, you can't get back in," the large man with a mustache says and I send him a glare before turning back towards the gate. I don't see the feet anymore... He must have left the stadium.

What the fuck?

"So, what are you doing, Miss?" the man asks as I crane my neck to try to spot the converse again, but I don't see them anywhere.

"I'm..." I send another suspicious look around before looking at the guard and coughing uncomfortably. "I'm going to go back to my seat."

He thinks I'm crazy, but I don't care. When I get back to my seat, I sit down with my arms firmly crossed across my chest.

"You didn't get anything?" Draco asks once he notices that I, in fact, have no food with me.

"I found I wasn't very hungry to begin with," I tell him angrily.

Stupid freaking Harry Potter. He constantly ruins my day.

I glance at Draco as he shrugs and looks back at the game. Who cares about Harry? Or Hermione or Ron? They left of my birthday and always made me feel left out. Screw them.

"Draco," I say gently to get his attention and when he tears his eyes away at the game to finally face me, I lean in a kiss him.

"What was that for?" He asks as he pulls back.

"Jesus, get a room," I hear Pansy joke.

"Preferably one with a camera," Blaise adds, but I ignore him.

"Just because," I say as I loop my arm under his and I turn back to the game as he smiles at me.

The falcons won the game, which put everyone in my present company in a good mood for the night. That meant that going out was something that was going to happen and all the girls went to Pansy's summer home to find something to wear. I debated whether I wanted to go home then because I knew I was pushing my luck and I fingered the seashell charm as the other girls moved about the kitchen, trying to find something to wear.

Yes, the kitchen.

I soon found out that 'Everything goes but clothes' meant that you literally could wear anything that didn't count as normal clothing in everyday society. Pansy wrapped herself in aluminum foil, turning it into some risque looking mini dress with a matching head band. Daphne picked duck take, and all she did was make a bra looking thing with it and a skirt that I don't think really counts as skirt it was so small... Millicent, who glared at me the whole entire time like I owed her a large sum of money, cut up a garbage bag and turned it into a sexy little black dress. I thought it was fitting that she was dressed in a trash bag considering her personality was garbage.

My own little joke made me smirk.

"Gin, what are you going to wear?" Pansy asked as she used the toaster as a mirror while she applied more lip gloss.

"I don't know," I shrugged as I looked around the room, halfheartedly looking for something.

"They won't let you in unless you follow the rules of the night," Daphne points out as she opens the pantry and starts rummaging through it, trying to find some material for me to wear.

"How about a cardboard box," Millicent says bitterly from the other side of the room. I ignore her, and so does everyone else.

"Here," Daphne says as she pulls out a bin of news papers that need to be recycled. "We can make you a quick dress out of this," she says as she pulls out her wand. "Strip down to your knickers, Ginny," she says as she starts pulling things out of the box.

I glance at Millicent. I actually don't want her to see my body and say bad things about me... but... oh, fuck her. She's mean and I know I'm not that bad anyways. I strip out of my shirt and shorts and Pansy and Daphne use their wands to secure the newspaper around me like a dress. They keep it short of course and strapless, and Pansy even lets me borrow a pair of her shoes before we leave. The dress is stiff and uncomfortable but more modest by far then my companions and we get to the club we find that the boys are already seated and inside on the second level in the VIP section.

Which surprised no one.

People inside were dancing to the music, dressed in all different kinds of materials. Metal, bubble wrap... I even saw a man in condom pants. It's wild. When we get upstairs and finally see the boys, I stop and put my hand on my hip. The material of the newspaper dress crinkles uncomfortably with the movement. They're all dressed in their normal clothes and I narrow my eyes as Draco runs and appreciate glance down my body.

"Why did we have to dress up if you didn't?" I state sourly as I take a seat beside Draco.

"You didn't have to," he points out and I glare at Pansy and Daphne as they smile at me.

"They said you could only get in if you..." they totally lied. I can tell by the way they're smiling at each other now. "Oh, never mind," I state as I slump against the back of the booth, my dress making annoying noises the whole time.

"It's fun, Ginny," Daphne says with a perky smile as she leans across the table, her boobs almost spilling out over the duck tape bra. "It's good to live a little every now and then."

"You give into peer pressure quite easily," Draco points out as he takes a drink from his glass. I take it from it and sniff it. It burns my nostrils just from the smell so I know it has to be strong. "You are in quite a mood today," he says with a laugh as I make a face and hand the glass back to him.

I think of Harry and how he ran away from me under that damn cloak and I nod my head. "I suppose I am."

A waitress comes by and Draco orders some kind of girly drink for me. It's takes like some kind of frozen strawberry concoction and I like it so I take my time drinking it as Draco puts his hand on my knee.

"Let's go dance," Pansy tries to pull me towards the dance floor, but I shake my head because I will not dance in this unsafe dress.

"No," is all I say as I focus on my drink.

"But, Ginny..." Daphne tries to persuade me, but Draco cuts her off.

"She said no," he says sternly as he glances at them. "Go with out her."

They both furrow their brows at him, but they don't question it as they head towards the dance floor. I watch them go and then I turn back to the table. Blaise and Draco are talking about the game and Millicent is on the other side of the booth, sitting next to another guy friend of Draco's that I never learned the name of.

I watch her as she flirts with him, batting her eyelashes and throwing her hair over her shoulder. I remember what she used to look like before having all that work done and I snort into my glass. Blaise gets up to use the loo after a while, leaving the four of us at the table in a terribly uncomfortable double date set up. Draco's fingers tickle the insides of my thigh as Millicent leans into the boy with lips pouting in a sexy way. She sends a quick look to Draco before running her fingers through the boys hair and I narrow my eyes.

I saw that look she just gave him. She wanted to know if he was watching her... she wanted to make him jealous.

Bitch.

I look at Draco to see what he's doing. He has his wand out and he's tapping it against a napkin, seeing if he has any written messages.

I catch Millicent sending another sly glance to Draco and I turn back to him and lean more against his body. He glances at me before going back to his magic, but I'm not done yet.

"What are you doing?" I ask in a soft voice, but I know full well what he's doing.

"Checking to see if anyone wrote me," he says, tapping through old messages on the napkin.

"Oh," I say and I look at Millicent as she whispers into the boys ear. I scoot even closer.

"Draco," I say to get him to look at me. When he does, I think he gets that I want his attention, so he puts his wand away. "Do you like this dress?" I ask.

He smirks and looks down. "Very much," he admits. "I like that I can read about the crime rate in Diagon Alley and look at your chest all at the same time," he says and when I look down I realize that's true and I laugh.

"At least I'm informative," I tell him and I can feel Millicent's eyes on me as I smile at _my_ boyfriend. Is he boyfriend? Yes, he is my boyfriend after all. She shouldn't be putting on a show for him. I put my hand over his under the table, and I move it up a little further on my thigh.

He raises an eyebrow and gives me an amused look.

"Quite a mood," he repeats as I lean over and kiss his cheek.

I can practically feel Millicent's bitter glare now and it makes me smile as I move my lips to his jaw and then to his neck. He squeezes my thigh and Millicent clenches her jaw.

"I'm going to be sick," she snaps and she stands from the table. "Let's dance Rowland."

The boy follows her as she stomps off and I pull away from Draco with a smirk on my face. Mission accomplished. I go to take a drink from my glass, but Draco takes it out of my hand and pulls me onto his lap.

"I don't think so," he says as I look at him in surprise for the movement. "You have to finish what you started now," he says darkly as he grabs the back of my head and presses his lips against mine.

I didn't even care that we were in public. I don't know what came over me, but I didn't even try to stop the kiss. I even unbuttoned a the first few buttons on his shirt so I could put my hand on his chest as his hand slithered up my thigh. I guess I was just having a bad day and I wanted to feel good.

"Well, this is always a good time."

"Go away," Draco said against my lips when Blaise came back to the table. "Now," he demands as I bite his ear lobe.

Blaise does walk away but I don't spare him another thought as I let myself get carried away in the kiss. "Let's go back to my place," Draco whispers after a few moments. "Get you out of this ridiculous dress."

There are so many things that could happen if I agreed to go back with him.

One of them being sex.

I definitely wanted to have sex with him, but I've never had sex and that was such a big move. My head knew it was a bad idea, but my body was all on board.

"Are you my boyfriend?" I asked, my lips burning with kisses. It sounded like a stupid question when I said it out loud, but I needed to know.

He smirks. "Do you want me to be?"

"Do you want to be?" I counter because I don't want it all on me.

"I think you know the answer to that," he says and then kisses me again. "Let's see," he says between kisses. "On a scale of one to ten... how much to you like me?"

I hesitate. "I would say a ten, I guess."

"You guess?" he says as he moves to my neck. Oh my god, I love it when he kisses my neck.

"On a scale of one to ten how much do you like me?" I ask back.

"Fifteen," he says without missing a beat and I smile. "Come on," he says as he urges me off his lap so he can stand up. "Let's get out of here."

I take his hand and let him pull me to my feet, but as we're walking away from the booth, Pansy comes running up to us, looking panicked.

"Oh, my god," she says, halfway out of breath and looking terrified. "Ginny, your Mom is here."

"What?" my voice was flat and with out humor. "That's not funny," I say seriously and she shakes her head.

"No, I'm fucking serious. She's talking to one of the bartenders now looking for you."

"How would she know you were here?" Draco asks and I grip the charm necklace again. She totally tracked me.

"Here," I say as I quickly take off the necklace and I hand it to her. It was so stupid of me to wear it out. My stupid childish fears are nothing compared to my mother's wrath. "Wear this, when she tracks it, tell her I let you borrow it for the day to go with your outfit or something. Tell her you work at Folk Hills as well," I say in a panic as I run over to the railing and look down at the bar.

My mother sticks out like a sore thumb in her house coat and sensible shoes. That, and the fact that she's the only middle aged person here makes her very noticeable.

"Is there a back way?" I ask because to use the front door, I'd have to pass her and that's risky.

"Of course there is," Draco answers me as Pansy puts on my necklace. "Come with me," he says as he takes my hand and starts walking me towards a hidden door on the second level. Once it's opened we run down the fire escape as he reaches for his wand.

"She is going to kill me," I say as he puts his arm around my waist. "She is going to murder me and I will never see the light of day again."

"Just lie successfully," Draco says before Apparating us away.

Of course, he did know where we lived and we landed a few yards outside of the gate that surrounds my house. It's raining as well and I would scream in frustration if I had the time.

Paper dress + Rain = disaster.

"I'll see you later," I tell Draco as I hop the fence and try to hold the dress together so it doesn't fall and reveal my underwear to the world.

I don't even bother to look over my shoulder as I run towards the house and go to the side that has my room. I need to climb because I know my father has to be home, so I tear off the rest of the stupid dress that's slipping off, leaving me in my bra and knickers as I start to climb up the siding, using the drain pipe and various damage holes in the side of our house as leverage. It was hard getting my window open, but once inside, I threw on an old sleep t-shirt and ran over to my bed, huddling under the covers and pulling my notebook to me so I could pretend to write if my father or mother came in.

An hour later, I hear the front door open and I flip on my stomach and open the notebook with my heart hammering in my chest.

I listen to footsteps as they come up the stairs and down the hallway, and I take in a deep breath when they open my door.

"Where have you been?" My mother accuses with my father hot on her heels.

"What do you mean?" I ask as I sit up and put my notebook on my lap.

She holds up the necklace and I try to look confused. "I followed this to an adult club in the city," she says in anger and I furrow my brows.

"I let Pansy borrow it tonight," I lie through my teeth as she walks further into the room, trying to find evidence of my misdeeds. "I didn't think you would mind."

"I checked your room, Ginevra," she says as she glares at me. "You weren't here."

"I was in the attic," the next lie comes quickly enough. "I was looking for something to write about," I tell them as I hold up my notebook.

"See Molly," My father says, finally finding his voice as he steps around my mother. "A reasonable explanation. You know our Ginny wouldn't sneak out and go to a club of all places."

My poor father and all his hope in me... I almost feel bad.

Mom glares at me for a few moments and then she looks at my Dad. I can see the wheels turning in her head and her resolve melts a little.

"You were in the attic?" she asks and I nod my head like a good liar. After a few moments she sighs and walks over to me, handing me the necklace as she kisses the top of my head. "Don't loan this out with out telling me. You nearly gave me a panic attack."

"I'm sorry, Mom," I admit as she steps back and watches me with her hands on her hips.

"Alright," she says with a head nod. "You should go to sleep now. It's after twelve."

"Yes," I say with a head nod.

"Night Ginny Bean," Dad says to me and I roll my eyes as they walk out of my room, shutting my door and turning off my light like I was a child again.

Once they're gone, I let out the breath I didn't know I was holding and I lay back against my pillows with the necklace still clutched in my hand. I let the metal slide through my fingers for a few moments before I sit up and throw it against the wall. Stupid thing and stupid tracker on it! I'm never wearing that again after that embarrassing display from my mother.

I try to fall asleep, but I just can't. I end up staring at my ceiling for hours, but I jump when I hear something tapping against the window. I find it's just an owl, a beautiful owl that belongs to Draco and I get up from my bed and open my window. It's not carrying a note and as soon the window is open, it flies off. I crane my neck to see were it's going and that's when I spot Draco standing on the other side of the fence. When the owl reaches him, it lands on one of the posts and Draco pets it's feathers before it flies off. He looks up at me and I give him a wave to let him know that I see him. He makes a motion for me to come down to him, but I don't want to go outside and risk it, so I chew on my lower lip until a thought strikes me. I hold up my finger to signal for him to wait and he nods his head before I run out of my room.

My parents are asleep and I try to be quiet as I tip toe into their room and sneak over to their chest of drawers. I know this is only for emergencies, but I don't care. Not right now. My father snores loudly and turns in his sleep and I pause a panicked second before opening the top drawer and digging through their socks until I find the small piece of paper that I'm looking for.

I gently unfold it and see the password written by our secret keeper and I smile to myself before creeping out of their bedroom and running back towards my own room. I close my door and lock it before running over to the window. I whistle for our barn own and the old sad thing comes stumbling to me like a drunk man.

I give it the bit of parchment and point to Draco. "Give it to him," I tell him and it flies off, nearly running into a tree before landing on the post by Draco and giving him the password. I watch as Draco reads it and then says the word out loud. My parents have always had that piece of paper in that drawer for as long as I can remember. People can't come onto our property without permission from my parents, or a password written or given from the secret keeper. My parents had it there just in case us kids needed it.

I doubt they would appreciate me using it for my boyfriend who's a Malfoy.

I watch with a smile as he hops the fence and jogs over to my window. He looks at the drain pipe and then up at me.

"You have to climb," I say down to him in a loud whisper and he makes a disagreeable face before doing just that.

He's better at it than me, actually, and he makes it to my window in two seconds.

"That wasn't so hard," he mutters as he climbs through my window and then he kisses me once he finds his footing. "Forgive me for the late night call, but I couldn't sleep."

"Me either," I admit as I walk towards my bed. He follows.

"Are you in much trouble?" he asks seriously and I shake my head .

"I convinced them that I was here the whole time."

"I'm proud of you," he says with a smirk as he starts unbuckling his belt.

"Uh, what are you doing?" I ask carefully as he pulls his shirt over his head and he heels out of his shoes.

"Getting ready for bed obviously," he says like I was stupid and I shake my head.

"You can't actually sleep here," I point out as he lets his pants drop, leaving him in his boxers and an undershirt. "My parents are home."

"Lock your door," he says with a shrug as he places his things on my dresser.

"They have wands. They can unlock doors," I say seriously and he rolls his eyes before fishing through his pocket and taking out his own.

"I have a wand too," he says as he points it to the door and he swishes his wand a few times. The door glows yellow before settling back to it's original color.

"What did you just do?" I ask and he glances at me as he puts his wand on my night stand.

"No wand but mine can unlock that door now, so we'll have plenty of time to fix things if your parents come knocking."

As he slips into my bed, I'm finally hit with the realization of the situation. He's in my bed, half naked and I was pretty much all over him earlier. Is he expecting something?

"Hey, come here," he says as he pulls me down until I'm laying beside him and he arranges the covers until we're both comfortably under them. "Your bed is small," he says as he kisses my forehead.

I pause a second before wrapping my arm around his torso and pulling my head on his shoulder. "Yes, I know," I say and then I hear him yawn. It makes me yawn as well. "Goodnight," I say, suddenly I do feel tired. I guess my mind is slowing down.

"Goodnight," I hear his voice rumble against his chest and I close my eyes.

When I turn around, he turns as well and molds himself behind me. It's nice to be held and I'm kind of glad he's not trying to do anything with me. I think that just makes me believe it more that he actually likes me. It makes me like him even more, to be honest.

After an hour his breathing evens out and I eventually allow myself to fall asleep as well.

I have another dream. A vivid dream like when I was younger and I find myself in the forbidden forest with blood on my hands. Of course, Draco shows up in my dream again, looking regal and handsome all dressed in black and he smirks at me as I try to wash the blood off.

"I've always liked you in red," he says.

The blood won't wash out no matter how hard I scrub.

"Harder," he says and I look at him. "You have to work harder if you want the blood to come out."

I started crying, and then I was laughing, and then I was having sex with Draco again.

When I wake up, I feel a hand between my legs and I crack my eyes open as his fingers slip under my knickers.

"What are you doing?" I whisper in a voice thick with sleep, still in that foggy state between sleeping and waking.

He kisses my cheek and I feel him smile against my skin.

"Judging by this," he says as he moves his fingers against my arousal. "Someone had a good dream."

I don't know if good is what I would call it.

"But," he says as he leans up on his elbow with his free hand. "I can make it a whole lot better," he says before rolling on top of me.

"This time," he says as he kisses my lips. "I'm going to teach you something new."

I was pretty tired, but that woke me up.

He is far too attractive for his own good.


	6. Chapter 6

I was being thoroughly seduced.

I knew it, I just didn't care. It felt too good to care. Even though I knew it was bad and a part of it was wrong, I just couldn't let myself stop. I was almost addicted to the way he was making me feel and I was constantly thinking about him...The way his voice sounded, the smell of his cologne... even the way his fingers felt against my skin were all categorized and tucked away in my brain to be brought up and recalled whenever I saw fit. Which seemed to be quite often, embarrassingly enough. After the first night I let him into my room, he would sneak in just about every night afterward to share my bed.

Not in that way, though. I never let myself get too carried away but I was learning new things about my body. Like where I wanted to be touched and what turned me on. Pansy had been right, Draco was a good teacher and I was so obsessed with the way he was making my body feel that I was an eager student to return the favor once I was completely satisfied. I never pictured myself as the kind of girl who would give head to her boyfriend while her parents were down the hall, but I was changing and I think everyone could see it.

"What are you thinking about now?" I look at Dr. Carol as she stares at me curiously and I nearly laugh. Oral sex with my boyfriend doesn't seem like the best area of discussion right now. "You seemed miles away."

"Nothing," I shrug it off and glance out the window again. "Just admiring the view."

"You mentioned earlier that you have been having vivid dreams again," she presses and I nod my head. "What of?"

"I've had them before," I tell her honestly and I glance at her from the corner of my eyes. "The dining hall dream... do you remember me telling you of that one?" I ask. It was one that had scared me so terribly when I was small and I would refuse to sleep for days after having it. She nods her head and I continue. "I've had that one recently, and the one where I can't wash the blood off my hands."

"Is there anything different about the nightmares now?" she asks as she writes something down on the clip board.

"They're not nightmares now," I state and she blinks at me behind her turtle shell glasses. "They don't feel the same anymore." I explain and then I turn my body towards her so I can really tell her about it. "I mean, the dead people are still in the hall with their mouths sown shut, and the Basilisk is still slithering around me... but it doesn't feel the same anymore. I'm not frightened... And Tom... Tom isn't there."

"Do you think it's because you've concurred your fear of him?" she asks and I raise an eyebrow. "You're no longer afraid in the dark hall and he's no longer sitting at the head of the table because you know he's not real and he can't hurt you anymore."

"I don't know," I say as I bring my fingers up to my mouth so I can chew on my nails.

"Perhaps Tom's empty chair is your subconscious telling you that you own your dreams now. That what once scared you, is now gone."

"His chair isn't empty," I point out as I remember the dream. I can picture Draco sitting their in his black suit, lifting his wine glass in my direction.

"Someone else sits in the chair now?" she asks, writing more furiously on her clipboard. We had talked about this dream at length when I was twelve. I know she knows everything about it.

"Yes."

"Who?" she questions further and I chew so hard on my thumb nail that it breaks.

"Draco," I say softly, like admitting it was shameful.

"Your boyfriend?" she says and I nod my head, not looking at her because I know what the implications of him sitting in that chair might mean.

"And how does that make you feel?"

I snort. She only says that when she doesn't know what else to say to me. "I'm not afraid of him like I was afraid of Tom," I point out. "And I'm not tied to the chair either. I could move if I wanted and I actually..." I trail off.

I don't want to tell her about the kinky sex part because that's just all kinds of messed up, even for me.

"Anyways," I shake my head. "Let's talk about something else," I say because I don't want to dig any deeper into that certain area of my brain.

"What would you like to talk about, Ginny?" She asks in a patient voice and I shrug my shoulders like the teenager that I am. "Do your parents know about your relationship with the Malfoy boy?"

I start laughing.

"Why does that make you laugh?" she asks with a frown and I shake my head with a bitter smile on my face.

"Could you imagine?" I ask out loud. "They would never let me out of the house again."

"You think your parents wouldn't approve of him?"

"Think?" I question sarcastically. "I know they wouldn't. They hate his family and everything they stand for."

"Why do you like him?"

I glance at her again. "I don't know," I say with a half shrug. "I just do. I like the way he makes me feel." Inside and out, actually.

"Does some of it have to do with rebelling against your parents?" she asks.

"Honestly," I say as I blink a few times. "Maybe some of it... but I do really like him."

"That's always a good thing," she says and I nod my head. "Does he make you laugh?"

"Yes," I say because I actually don't like talking about this with her. "Did you watch the Falcons came on Thursday?" I counter to change the subject.

We talk about that for a while before she tries to steer the conversation back to my dreams. I'm glad when the session is over. Of course, my irritating mother is waiting for me in the waiting room and she grills me on how it went as well. I stay tight lipped about the whole thing because, frankly, what goes on between me and my therapist is none of her business.

Oh, geez. I think I have been hanging around Slytherins far too much.

We Apparate just outside of the gate to our home and I start thinking about Draco. A small smile comes to my face as I remember what we did when he came over last night. I wonder if he'll show up again. I really hope that he does. Besides the whole fooling around part, I actually like talking to him. He's so smart and witty and with all of my friends either missing or ignoring me, I find that he's filling a role that I really needed. A friend. I just needed someone to talk to and someone to listen to me. I start humming a song as we walk towards the door and I can feel my mother's eyes on me with each step.

"Ginny?" she says. I blink out of my thoughts and look at her.

"Hm?" I say softly and she gives me an odd knowing smile before opening the door.

"Nothing," she says with a pleased glint to her eye before we go inside.

The kitchen is full of people when we get in and I stop in the doorway as I look around the table at all the morose faces.

Tonks and Remus sit at one side of the table next to Bill and Fluer.

Charlie is sitting by my father.

Kinsley is standing against the wall speaking in a low whisper to Mad eye Moody.

And Snape... Snape is staring right at me.

"Why is the Order here?" I question as I step further into the room. My mother makes a face at the guests as well before walking towards my father.

"Arthur, what has happened?" she asks.

"Ginny," My Dad says as he stands up and puts his hand on my back. "Why don't you go upstairs?"

"No," I say as I push his hand off. Everyone looks concerned and I want to know what's going on. "What happened? Why are they here and why does everyone look so worried?"

Harry, Hermione, and my brother cross my mind and I swallow the lump in my throat.

"Go to your room, Ginevra," my mother says and I sneer at her.

"I'm almost of age," I point out. "I can handle information."

"Perhaps it is best if she knows," Remus says as he glances at me. "She will find out from the papers eventually anyways."

"Find out what?" I question in confusion.

My father stares at my mother and then back to me. "Let's sort through this first," he says and when I realize he's siding with my mother, I nearly scream. "Go upstairs, Gin," he says, squeezing my shoulder because he'll know I get mad. "We'll let you know the important things later. After we've talked through the kinks."

"Are you kidding me? That's bullshit."

"Ginny!" My mother hisses, but I don't hang around for the scolding she was going to give me as I stomp towards the stairs. My hands are shaking I'm so mad and I nearly punch a hole in the wall as I walk towards the my room with angry steps.

Why does she treat me that way? She's so annoying and I am not a child anymore. Well, I'll find out what they're talking about anyways.

I run to my room and dig through my vanity drawer, pulling out the extendable ear. It really has come in handy. I go back to the hallway and sit at the top of the stairs, putting one end of the flesh colored string in my ear and letting the other roll down the stairs until it curls around the post in search of voices. It takes a few moments before I actually hear someone talking, but when I hear Remus' voice, I smirk in victory.

"The papers are going to say it was a robbery gone wrong," He says and I tilt my head to hear better. "They've covered their tracks to make it look like a botched break in."

"But they haven't found a body?" My mother asks and I sneer when I hear her voice because I am so fed up with her.

"No," that's Tonk's voice. "But there was blood found at the scene. I think we can assume that she's dead."

"Do you truly believe this is tied in with You-know-who and his people? They've been keeping such a low profile," my Dad says and a chill goes up my spine when I realize they're talking about Voldemort and his death eaters.

"The only reason they would take or hurt Minerva would be to get to Dumbledore. We all know he's missing and I think Voldemort is looking for him. Trying to search him out," Remus says seriously and I furrow my brows. Dumbledore's missing... and Minerva? As in, Minerva McGonagall? My head of house? What? "He can't get to Harry with Dumbledore still around. Everyone knows that."

"What if she's still alive?" My father asks sadly. "Being held somewhere for information."

"The Auror department isn't looking into it as a missing persons case," That voice is deep and raspy. I figure it must be Kinsley. "Voldemort has people everywhere," he adds savagely. "If we believe Minerva is still alive, which I believe she may be, then we will have to find her with out the help of the Ministry. They are under Voldemort's wing, whether they know it or not."

"But why Minerva?" My mother asks and I roll my eyes at her voice.

"I think it's a message," Remus says.

"To whom?" Mom says and I can tells she's crying a bit.

"To us."

"Where is Dumbledore?" Bill, my brother, asks. "Why hasn't he contacted anyone?"

"We're not sure, but he made it known that he wasn't returning to Hogwarts in the fall until the second half of the year," Remus answers and I bite my lip.

"Who's running the school in his absence?" My mother asks and then there's a very long and very uncomfortable silence. In fact, I thought the extendable ear might have been malfunctioning, so I take it out and blow on it a few times before putting it back in.

"Really?" Bill says flatly and I wish I was in the freaking room so I could know what's going on.

"I assure you I am not pleased with this outcome either," I jump when I hear Snape. I had forgotten he was in the room and his disdainful voice gives me chills. "If this was all the meeting was for, then I will take my leave. It will do no good letting other people know that I have been here."

His footsteps come towards the stairs so he can go out the back door. I scramble, trying to get the extendable ear out of the way before he sees it. Once I have it all gathered, I stand up and hide it behind my back as I see Snape's black cloak peeking past from the bottom of the stairs. I can see his head now, and he pauses a moment before looking up and over his shoulder, right at me. His black eyes are surveying me oddly, and I stare right on back until he sneers and walks out the back door with a slam of the screen door.

Creep.

Things start moving around downstairs, so I head towards my room in fear of getting caught spying. I wish Hermione was here so she could talk me through this and figure out exactly what's happening. McGonagall is missing, feared dead, and the Auror department isn't doing anything about it? It makes my stomach hurt and I sit down on my bed as I stare at the wall with a frown on my face. If she's really dead, I think it would just tear me up.

I really liked McGonagall. She was a good teacher and an excellent head of house, but most of all she was very kind to me after the events of my first year. I spent many sleepless nights in her office, sipping tea when the nightmares would keep me awake . She never made me feel bad or guilty for it and I never got in trouble for being out of bed after hours. I liked her very much.

I feel like I should cry or something, but my eyes are dry because I think there is a little bit of hope still shining through it all. They didn't find a body, I guess. That means she might still be alive like Kinsley suggested. That's a step in the right direction, but that means the Death Eaters are moving now and making plans.

It's kind of frightening to think about and I grab my pillow to hold it to my chest.

Maybe they're talking about another Minerva... but honestly... who else is named freaking Minerva?

And Dumbledore. Where the heck is he at and why isn't he coming back to school? I can't imagine Hogwarts being run by Snape. It nearly makes me ill when I imagine it and I start chewing on my fingernails again. I really wish Hermione was here.

My father knocks on my door after some time and asks to come in. I tell him I'm trying to sleep, so he walks away with out another word and I glare at the door. I find a scowl on my face when I think of my parents pushing me out of the room when I have every right to know what's going on in the world as they do.

I don't know how long I sat there, thinking through the bit of conversation that I heard from the kitchen, but I nearly jump out of my skin when I hear a tap on my window.

I put my hand over my beating heart and relax some when I see Draco there, waiting to be let in. He's smartened up and started bringing his broom so he wouldn't have to climb up the drain pipe each time.

"Hey there," he greets as I open the window for him. "I didn't mean to come over unannounced, but I wanted to see you," he says as he steps into my room, propping his broom up against the wall.

He's wearing a hunter green rain cloak and his hair is soaked.

"It's raining," he points out obviously because I keep on staring at the state he's in. He takes off his cloak and hangs it across my chair. "It started pouring pretty bad on my way here," he says as he takes off his boots that are caked in mud.

It's the summer time, so his outfit seems strange to me right now. Black pants with a long sleeved black shirt? That doesn't seem like something a person would wear on a hot rainy night.

"Are you alright?" he asks once all of his things are settled and he finally gets a look at me. "You look like you've seen a ghost or something."

"Draco," I say slowly as I walk towards my bed and take a seat. He takes out his wand and does the special locking charm before placing it on my nightstand and taking a seat beside me. I look him square in the eyes. "Do you think Lord Voldemort is back?"

He studies my face for a second before looking away. "Why do you ask that?" he says to the wall and I look down at my knees awkwardly.

"Harry saw him come back," I say, trying to feel out his opinion on the matter. "What do you believe?"

"That is one thing..." he says slowly, trying to find the right words. There's a long pause and I put my hand on his knee to bring him back to the conversation. He glances at me. "No," he says firmly like he decided what he wanted to say. "I don't think he's back," he finishes, looking away again.

"So you don't believe?" I confirm and he nods his head. "I heard that McGonagall is missing," I say.

His sharp eyes snap to mine. He has that calculating look back. "Where did you hear that?"

I don't want to tell him how... the fact that the Order meets occasionally at my house doesn't need to be broadcasting to anyone.

"They think she may be dead," I say, ignoring his question as he stands up, towering over me. His reactions seem quite odd to me, but talking about Voldemort and death is uncomfortable for everyone. "They think Death Eaters did it."

"Who thinks that?" he asks coldly and I stand up as well with my brows knitted together.

"Why are you being so short with me?" I ask seriously. I just wanted to talk about it, be comforted. If Hermione was here this would be an easy conversation to work through. "It's just... if it's true it is very sad... and very scary," I admit.

"You shouldn't be scared," he says as he looks into my eyes. He brings a hand up and cups my cheek. "Don't worry too much about it."

"How can we not worry about it?" I ask seriously as he runs his thumb over my chin, staring at me like he was trying to remember each freckle on my face.

It kind of weirds me out the way he's staring right now, if I was being honest.

Wait, he is a Malfoy. What side of the discussion is he on with this?

"Do you..." I trail off.

I was going to ask him what his thoughts were on the matter... if he sided with Vodlemort and his Death Eaters... but I suppose a part of me didn't want to know the answer, so I didn't finish the question. He said that he didn't believe in Harry's words about Voldemort being back, anyways. It might have been a pointless question.

"Nevermind," I say with a head shake as I pull away from him and sit back on the bed, pulling the pillow back to my lap.

"Zabini is having people over tonight," he says, switching the subject. "I think we should go."

"Why?" I ask because it seems so out of the blue.

"Because I want to," he says as he walks back towards my window so he can put on his boots. "I've had a long day," he says softly, like he was trying to soften his initial words. "I would like to hang out for a little while."

"I don't know," I say with a head shake. My head is still reeling from the discussion in the kitchen. I don't know if I'd be able to go to a party. "I think I'm going to stay here," I tell him as I stand up and walk towards my vanity. I start taking out my earrings. I'm still in the clothes I wore to the therapist, a pair of jean capri's and a striped green tank top. The thought of my pajamas is very pleasing to me right about now.

He walks up behind me and I see him looking at me in the mirror as he puts his hands on my hips, pulling me back into his chest.

"Come with me," he says, bending down to kiss my neck. Seduction again.

I lean into the kiss before shaking my head and pulling myself away. I cant let him manipulate me all the time into doing what he wants... right?

"I'm not feeling it," I say as I try to slink out of his grip, but he holds firm.

"It will take your mind off things," he says, staring at my reflection. I stare right back until he sighs. "Please?" he asks softly while raising one of his brows.

I bite my lip and think of McGonagall and Dumbledore... and my parents. I narrow my eyes at the way they dismissed me down stairs and, realizing they would positively hate it if I went with Draco right now, I've officially decided to go.

I don't say anything for a few moments as I stare at him and then I look down. "Only for a little while," I give in like a chump and he smirks before kissing my shoulder.

"Thank you," he says as he walks back to his boots.

I slip on a pair of shoes and try to make myself look presentable for a gathering as Draco lays his rain cloak around my shoulders.

"It's still raining," he says as he clasps it for me and throws up the hood.

My expression softens as I look at him and I kiss his cheek. "Thanks," I say softly as he climbs onto his broom and I slide behind him with my arms planted firmly around his waist. It's just sprinkling now and I tuck my face into Draco's back as he angles the broom to land just beyond the fence so we can Apparate.

"There is no way in hell we're riding all the way to Zabini's," he says before lifting his wand.

We land just outside Zabini's gate and Draco seems to know the code to get in because he punches a series of numbers into a small key pad on the side so the gate will slowly creek open. When we get closer to the house, my jaw drops. There were so many people! 'Blaise is having people over' is an understatement. It was a whole freaking house party with a disc jockey pounding music so loud it vibrated the walls and people falling all over the place with drinks in their hands.

"This looks fun," I state thickly as a group of drunk crying girls pass us as we walk into the large lavish house. I glance at Draco as he looks about while I take off the rain cloak. He looks very annoyed with the current state of things.

"I didn't know so many people were going to be here. I don't enjoy large parties like this one," he says seriously as he steers me through the crowd. "Do not leave my side tonight," he demands and I roll my eyes before accepting the drink someone hands me. "And..." he says as he takes the drink away from me and pours it out in one of the random plants. "Do not accept drinks from strangers. Come on, Ginny," he says with a head shake. "Drinking 101."

"What kind of people are at this party?" I ask him suspiciously because he seems on edge with his eyes darting around the crowded place like he was looking for someone to hit. I've been to parties with him before and it never seemed to bother him.

"People out of their social grade," he says with disdain and I look at his profile as I follow him through the house. It looks like he hasn't shaved in a couple days... he has some stubble growing in.

"Why are you staring at me?" he asks dryly as we make our way through the crowd.

I look away quickly. "I'm not staring," I mutter, embarrassed that he noticed.

When we reach the kitchen, I finally see someone I know. Blaise is mixing up some kind of drink in a blender with a cigarette firmly planted behind his ear for safe keeping. It looks like he got a hair cut. His black curls are now closely cropped to his head and it annoys the hell out of me that I noticed. When he sees us, he smirks.

"Couldn't keep away, could you, Malfoy?" he says as we approach.

"Did you invite every low life in Diagon Alley?" Draco asks in disdain as he looks around the room with his nose slightly crinkled. "Honestly, this is disgusting."

Blaise shrugs a shoulder as he turns on the blender. When it's blended the way he wants, he removes his finger from the button and looks at Draco. "It started small and then my dealer showed up..." he looks at me and smiles. I guess it's because I made a face at hearing him say 'my dealer.' "You understand how these things get out of hand."

Draco rolls his eyes and then glances at me before walking towards a closed cabinet below the sink.

"What do you want to drink?" He asks as I follow him. He unlocks it with his wand and I fold the cloak over my arm so I can carry it more comfortably.

"Whatever you're having is fine."

He laughs a little as he takes a glass bottle from it's hiding place and he pours the amber liquid into two ice filled glasses that he made another person get... like the charming thing that he is. He hands one to me and I sniff it before crinkling my nose.

"It will burn on the way down the first few sips," he explains as he takes a drink from the remaining glass. "But after that it will taste like heaven."

"What is it?" I ask as I take a small sip. I nearly spit it out because it burns my tongue so bad. "Oh, my god!" I say as I make a horrid scrunched up face. "What is this?"

"It's the best firewhiskey money can buy, I can assure you," Blaise answers as he takes the bottle from Draco and puts it back in the special cabinet, locking it securely. "But don't broadcast that fact," he says as he looks around at the people in the kitchen. "I don't want to waste good alcohol on anyone here."

"How do you know these people?" I ask as I look around me. Most of them do look rather rough, and there's a group of homeless looking men in the corner smoking something from a large pipe.

"I don't," he says with a shrug as Draco takes another drink from his glass. "But that is half the fun and..." he says as he smirks at the people in the room. "I want the house looking nice for when my mother and new step dad arrive," he says with a wink. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go play host."

He leaves with whatever drink he made in the blender and I turn my body towards Draco again. "Do you suppose Pansy and Daphne are here?" I ask as I crane my neck to look into one of the other rooms.

"I suppose they are," he answers. I can feel him staring at me as I look around. "Would you prefer their company tonight?" he asks coldly and I spare him a little glance.

"Of course not," I say to sooth his ego or whatever and I let him take my hand.

"Let's find some where else to stand. I detest the smell of tree hugger," he says as he eyes the homeless men in the corner.

I nearly laugh at his comment, but the seriousness in which he said it made me believe he was being honest, so I follow him into an adjoining room. There wasn't much breathing space and it was hard to get through the sea of bodies as they danced to the music the DJ was playing. It vibrated my heart and I was glad when Draco kept walking.

There were girls dancing on tables, guys smoking things that made purple smoke, and everyone was taking shots of all kinds of liqueur. It was a little overwhelming and I tried not to make eye contact with anyone as we kept walking. We ended up in a room at the other end of the house where the music wasn't so loud and the smoke wasn't so thick. It must be some kind of entertainment room because there were Quidditch Jerseys on the walls, a billiards table in the center of the room, and a dart board in the far left corner. It seemed very manly as well, with a stuffed lions head and other dead animals mounted on the walls.

"This is charming," I say as I eye the lions head, permanently snarling.

"My ears don't feel like bleeding back here," is Draco's response and I laugh as he throws back his drink.

I find an empty, clean looking, section in the room and I lean against the wall with Draco by my side. I think he's looking at me. I glance at him. Yeah, definitely looking.

"What?" I say uncomfortably as I bring a hand up to my face.

He smiles in a odd kind of way and then he takes a strand of my hair. "What color is your hair exactly?" he asks as he twirls it around his finger like it was the most fascinating thing he's ever seen. He props his hand up beside my head to make himself more comfortable as he practically cages me against the wall.

"Uh, red," I say because I'm awesome with words.

He shakes his head. "Not really," he says as he looks at it. "It's brown and orange, with a little bit of red... if the light hits it just right, it almost looks copper."

"I didn't realize you payed so much attention to my hair," I say with a pleased smile because this conversation is making my stomach flutter nicely.

"Hm," is all he says and then he smirks darkly at me like he was about to say something sinful, but someone says his name. The person also taps on his shoulder, breaking our little moment and making him turn around.

"Draco," Cho. Ew. "Ginny," she adds, looking at me like I had killed her Grandmother or something. "How are you guys doing?" she asks awkwardly.

She looks pretty, like always, and I mentally sneer at that fact. Why is she talking to us right now? Draco doesn't say anything, so I glance at him as she starts to knot her fingers uncomfortably. This is getting weird and Draco is just looking at her like she ruined his day. I feel guilty and step in.

"We're good," I say, giving her a fake smile. She seems relieved that I said something. "How are you?"

"I'm alright," she says, flicking a glance at Draco as he eyes her coolly. "I'm really sorry, but, Draco... can I talk to you for a moment?"

"No," he says and I give him a surprised look as Cho's face heats in embarrassment.

"But..."

"I said no," he says firmly and even I'm embarrassed for her.

"Don't be mean," I whisper to him. I actually don't know why I care so much, to be honest. I don't even like Cho, but she's never been mean to me or anyone that I know... and Draco... he can just be cruel sometimes and right now he is being just that. "I'll be right back," I say as I start walking away so she can talk to him.

I'm not exactly sure what I'm doing. Cho makes me jealous and I hate that she was with Draco, but I don't know... I just didn't like that dismissive way he was treating her. Maybe it's because I fear one day he will be that way to me.

"I told you to stay by me," he says as he grabs my wrist. I give him a furious look. "Whatever she needs to say can be said in front of you."

This is all kinds of awkward.

Cho doesn't say anything to that. She just gives Draco one cold glare that makes me feel terrible.

"Draco," I say softly until he looks down at me. "Go talk to her."

He eyes me for a few moments before flicking a glance at Cho. "Fine," he says sharply. "You do not move from this spot," he orders and I narrow my eyes as he walks into another room with Cho.

I have no idea why I let that happen.

I bite my lip and try not to look like a loser by myself at a party as I wait for their talk to be finished. I wonder what she has to talk to him about right now. Is it serious? Oh, god, is she pregnant? That thought makes me want to vomit, but I did catch them doing something terrible in that supply closet at Folk Hills one time. It could be possible. That would explain why she has to talk to him so badly.

What would I do if that was the case? What if she's not pregnant and she just wants him back? She is prettier than I am. Ugh. I know I'm getting ahead of myself here with my suspicious mind, but now I'm completely paranoid and after ten minutes I figure that they have had enough alone time together. I should go find out what's happening with them.

I push off the wall and start walking into one of the other rooms to find them. I should have just let Draco dismiss her like he was going to but my stupid sympathy got the best of me. I can't find them anywhere downstairs and I don't even see a familiar face among the crowd. Just a bunch of strangers, dancing and sweating and drinking together.

Gross.

After a man with a goatee tries to sell me some green pills in the shape of dragons, I decide that this isn't a place I want to be wondering around by myself. I'm almost pleased when I see Ivy, Pansy's younger sister, sitting on one of the stairs.

"Thank God," I whisper as I push through some more people, still holding onto that stupid cloak and firewhiskey. "Ivy," I say to get her attention. She's sitting with some bloke I've never seen and when she notices me, her eyes narrow the slightest bit.

"Hey," I say when I reach her. I don't know her very well, actually. She is in my grade, but she's always been a snobby bitch to me in all of our classes together. Not that it's any surprise, to be honest. Pansy was the same way too until I became her friend. "Have you seen Draco?"

"No," she says like I was trespassing on some serious conversation.

"Oh," I say as I try not to snap back at her because of that look that she's giving me. "Is your sister here?"

"No," she says again as she looks me up and down. It makes me uncomfortable and that's probably why she's doing it.

What a bitch.

"Where is she?" I ask to keep the conversation going because, even though she's acting like she would rather be talking to a spider, I still don't want to stand by myself.

"I'm not her keeper," shes and then she smiles unpleasantly at the guy by her side. "Charles, this is Malfoy's girlfriend," she says and he looks at me as well like I had sprouted another head. "Malfoy's girlfriend, this is Charles."

"I have a name," I say as I bite the inside of my cheek.

"It doesn't matter what your name is," she says and I furrow my brows as she stands up. Charles stands up as well. "You have one defining title and that's all you are," she says and I feel my lip curling back in a sneer. "Let's see how long you hold his attention. After that, you go back to being nothing."

She walks past me, and my temper won't allow me to hold back my tongue. "Do you know what your defining title is?" I ask and she glances at me over her shoulder. I really am going to say this. I have to amp myself up for this one.

"What's that?" she asks with a delicate eyebrow arched. She looks so much like Pansy right now, so close but not exact.

"Slut."

Oh, my god. I really just said that.

I can see her eyes inflame and she turns around fully to give me her full attention. "What did you just say to me?" she snaps and I stand my ground. It seems foolish for me, actually. I have no one right now to back me up.

"I think you heard me," I say as I try to tilt my chin up. "You're treating me like I've done something to you, but I never have."

"Call me a slut again," she says as she reaches into the pocket of her skinny black jeans to pull out her wand.

As soon as I see it, I realize a little late in the fighting game that I, in fact, did not bring my wand with me.

"Ivy," her friend Charles grips her arm and they share a look as he shakes his head. "You can't," he says and she gives me one last hateful look before putting her wand away and stomping off.

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding and I glance around me once more. I realize most of the people in the vicinity had stopped what they were doing to watch the interaction like it was part of some show. To avoid it, I turn around and walk up the stairs. My heart is hammering as I check the rooms and hallways for Draco, or at least someone I know who doesn't hate me. I don't find anyone... but I do find an empty room at the end of the hall.

No people are using it for sex or drug use, so I turn on the light and shut the door tightly behind me. I need to get away from all those people. I walk towards the bed and sit down on the mattress, feeling it sink beneath me as I put my drink on the night stand and the cloak on the floor. I bring my hand up to my mouth so I can bite my fingernails.

I can't believe I called Ivy Parkinson a slut like that.

A part of me feels really good about it, but another part is nervous. You never know what people like her are capable of.

I glance around the chic room as I ignore the music and voices thumping downstairs. The walls are painted a pretty steel blue color with black furniture and soft lighting. It's decorated with stylish curtains and tasteful black and white art all placed perfectly on the walls to make it look pleasing. It looks untouched almost, like a hotel or a designers room from a magazine. It makes me uncomfortable, really, and I cross my arms because I feel quite cold.

I figure this must be a guest bedroom or something, but when I open one of the bedside table drawers I see someone's personal effects. A well worn book with some pages dogeared and a broken watch rest on top. I move them to the side and find a whole package of condoms that I make a face at and a half empty pack of cigarettes.

I pick it up and sniff it.

Blaise.

I put the cigarette pack back in the drawer and sort through a few other things before seeing a yearbook all the way at the bottom of the drawer. It's last years Hogwarts yearbook, and I pull it out to look at it, hopefully to put me in a better mood.

The yearbook is divided up by houses, with Hufflepuff in the front, followed by Ravenclaw, Slytherin, and finally, Gryffindor. I skim through the house pages until I find Luna's picture. She's smiling and waving at something just to the right of the camera and she has flowers intertwining in her long, wavy hair. She went all out for picture day last year and I remember her spending the better part of the day sticking those wild flowers in her hair.

I miss Luna.

Stupid Theodore Nott.

I narrow my eyes and turn the page away from the stupid Hufflepuffs. I flick through the pages and notice a few of the pictures have been circled with a bright green pen. All of them are girls, pretty girls, and I make a disgusted face when I figure it must be like a collection of girls Blaise has slept with or wants to sleep with. Cho is circled as well as her friend Hannah Abbot and Claire Walker. Daphne was circled, as well as Millicent, but Pansy wasn't and it confused me. Obviously Blaise has slept with her considering they are 'kind of' together.

Before I can make it to my own house, a piece of paper falls out of the book from between the pages and I bend down to pick it up.

It looks like a saying of some sort and the handwriting is neat and loopy, like a girls.

_From the deepest desires often comes the deadliest hate._

I furrow my brows as I read it again. I don't recognize it from anywhere. What is it supposed to mean? Someone starts to turn the handle on the door and it makes me jump. I feel like I'm doing something wrong, so I quickly stuff the paper into my pocket and I throw the yearbook back into the drawer.

I glance to my right to see Blaise and immediately make a face.

"Oh, you look thrilled to see me," he says sarcastically. "I'm sorry, were you waiting on someone else to come and ravish you on my bed?"

"Shut up," I mutter. "I didn't know this was your room."

"Right," he says as he walks over to the bed and I hold my breath as he opens up the drawer I was rummaging through.

He pauses for a second as he looks down at it and then he pulls out the pack of cigarettes.

"I'll never be annoyed when I see a pretty girl sitting on my bed," he says. He takes a seat beside me and he puts one of the cigarettes in his mouth, lighting it with his wand. "But, it is a well established rule that no one goes into my room unless I invite them."

He said that so seriously and I blink a few times before biting my lip. "I'm sorry. I just needed to get away form the crowd," I admit.

"What happened?" he asks and I turn away from him. "You seem on edge."

"None of your business," I tell him tightly because I want him to go away.

"I bet that you're a bit bothered over calling Ivy Parkinson a slut, eh?" he says and when I glare at him, he smirks and flicks ashes onto the floor. I stare at the because the place looks so meticulously clean. "News travels fast in these circles if you haven't noticed. You had every right to call her such a name," he says and I glance at him. "She is a bit of a whore."

I roll my eyes.

"You could own them, you know," he says after a long bout of silence as he inhales a long drag and then blows the smoke from the corner of his mouth.

"What are you talking about?" I snap and he smirks at me.

"Everyone downstairs... All of our acquaintances," he says as he nods back to the door. "You could own them and you have no clue."

"What do you mean?" I question and he laughs again. God, he's pretty. It's almost disgusting how pretty he is.

"You're so naive it hurts," he says and when I go to protest he cuts me off. "You have something every girl wants," he says and I narrow my eyes.

"And whats that?" I ask hatefully.

"Well, besides a charming personality," he adds with a rueful grin. I glare again. "You have a Malfoy, and not just any Malfoy... the Malfoy," he says and he turns his body so his leg is crossed on the bed and pressing into my side.

"What does that even mean?" I question. I mean, I like Draco and all, but come on. Not everyone has to want him. It is not my defining title like Ivy had said. I'm more than just Draco's girlfriend.

"It's like chess, you see," He takes out the spare cigarettes from his pack and starts arranging them on the mattress. "The board is the life, right?" he says as he motions to the bed. I guess that's supposed to be the board. "And everyone is positioned in certain places on each side of the board, right?"

"Right," I say, trying to understand.

"And they all have their purpose in the big scheme of things," he says. "You move someone forward, someone gets taken out of the game, someone waits in the back for their turn to shine, someone protects the king..." he trails off and looks at me. "Do you understand yet?" he asks and I raise an eyebrow.

"Not really," I say and he rolls his eyes. "Draco is an important person on the board?" I ask, looking down at the cigarettes on his bed.

He laughs again. "Well, he's no pawn. That's for sure."

"I don't get where this is going," I tell him honestly.

"Draco's not just an important piece on the board, honey," he says and I inwardly cringe at the term of endearment coming from him. He flicks more ashes on the floor and holds the burning cigarette in his left hand. He looks down at his makeshift chess board and then looks back at me with his amber eyes shining. "He's not a piece," he repeats. "He's one of the players."

I lick my lips uncomfortably as his golden eyes look into mine. "So, what does that make me?" I ask and he smirks while reaching into his pocket and taking out a coin.

"The most powerful piece on the board," he says with a sly smile as he places it on the bed with the other silly chess pieces. "You're the queen, baby."

"Blaise."

Our heads snap to the doorway where Draco is standing, glaring at both of us with fire in his eyes.

"Draco," Blaise greets as he gathers his cigarettes and puts them back into the pack. "How good of you to join us."

"Why are you in here with her?" he asks coldly and Blaise's face changes at his tone. That lightheartedness that he seemed to have had vanishes when he looks at Draco. "Well?" He asks impatiently and Blaise stands up quickly, placing his cigarettes in the breast pocket of his red polo.

"She was already here when I came in," he answers seriously, like he thought he was in trouble, and I furrow my brows at Draco because he has yet to look at me. Instead, he's staring intently at Zabini. His icy facial expression has yet to waver. "I just wanted to get something," he says as he pats his pocket.

"Why were you sitting on the bed if you just came in to get something?" Draco asks levelly and I stand up as well because I'm starting to feel uncomfortable with the tension in the room.

"It's not like that, Malfoy," Blaise says and then he sighs. "They door was open anyway," he says like it was obvious as he motions to the door. "You know I wouldn't..."

"You can leave now," Draco cuts him off and dismisses him coldly.

Blaise doesn't say anything, he just shakes his head and walks past Draco with out a word. Once he's gone, Draco shuts the door and then turns towards me with a raised eyebrow like he was expecting an explanation from me.

"I just came in here to be by myself because I couldn't find you," I say because I know why he seems suspicious, I guess. "I didn't know it was his room."

"I told you to stay where you were," he snaps at me and I let my shoulders slump at his tone. "Why didn't you listen to me?"

"I went to find you," I admit. "I didn't want to stand by myself anymore."

"You were the one who wanted me to go talk to her," he says hatefully. He seems angry with me. Legitimately angry and it baffles me. "And I told you to stay put. I've been looking for you this whole damn time."

I raise my eyebrows by his harsh wording and I shake my head. "I'm sorry. I just..."

"Just what?" he snaps and then I narrow my eyes.

"You have no reason to be this angry with me," I say as I think it over and decide that, while he can be mildly annoyed, being this upset is out of line. "I went to go look for you. What did Cho want to talk about anyways?" I try to turn the conversation with my hands on my hips and he stares me down.

"Something stupid, like always," he says and I make a face because that doesn't explain anything. "That's why I didn't want to fucking talk to her, but I did because you told me to. I expected you to listen to me as well, but you didn't. Instead you ended up in a bedroom with one of my friends."

"You say that like we were doing something bad," I say in defense. "I just came up here to get away from the crowd and hopefully find you. Blaise came in later and just started talking. I didn't do anything with him... God, I don't even like him."

"What did he say to you?" he asks as he walks towards me with slow, calculated steps. I don't like the way he's looking at me right now. "What were you two talking about?"

I shrug because if he can be annoyingly vague about his conversation with Cho... so can I. "Chess."

"You were talking about chess?" he asks dryly and I nod my head. When he gets close enough he narrows his eyes. "That hardly seems believable."

"Do you think I cheated on you?" I ask and he doesn't say anything for a few moments. I shake my head. "I wouldn't cheat on you," I tell him and he snorts.

"You all say that until you do and then somehow make it my fault," he says and I bite the inside of my cheek, almost feeling bad for him because of what he said. A relationship must have burned him in the past.

"That's not fair," I say with a head shake and he stares at me for a few moments before shaking his head.

"Come on," he says as he takes my hand. "It's almost two. Let's go back to your place."

"Are you still upset?" I ask because I feel like this conversation isn't over. I grab his cloak as he tugs on my arm.

"We'll talk about it later," he says levelly as we leave the room and head down the hallway. "But, for future reference, it is not okay for you to be alone in bedrooms with other blokes."

Right.

"Understandable," I say because I do kind of see his point.

Kind of.

"I'm glad you understand," he says as he pushes people to the side as we walk down the stairs.

On the way down, I catch Ivy from the corner of my eyes and I stop walking. Blaise said I could own them and I look at Draco as he gives me an irritated glance for not moving.

"Draco," I say slowly as I look at Ivy and that Charles guy. "When I was trying to find you, I got in a fight with Pansy's little sister."

"What happened?" he asks as he follows my eyes to Ivy as well.

"I asked her if she knew where you were..." I trail off, deciding not to tell him the whole conversation. "She wouldn't even call me by my name. She said that it didn't matter because if I wasn't your girlfriend than I would be nothing. It was really mean. I've never done anything to make her treat me like that."

He eyes her for a few moments before glancing down at me. "She actually said that to you?" he asks and I nod my head. "I'll talk to her tomorrow," he says before turning away. "But now I want to go to bed."

I smirk at his back when I remember how he spoke to Millicent after she pushed me into the lake and I send Ivy another pleased look over my shoulder before we leave the house. I hope his talk with her is half as good as his talk with Millicent.

I'm officially in a better mood now.

We leave the crowded party, and when we finally get back to my room, I pull that bunched up piece of paper out of my pocket and place it on the table.

"I have a question," I say as he sits down on my bed to take off his boots. His eyes catch mine before I look down at the paper I had taken from Zabini's room. "Do you know who said '_From the deepest desires often comes the deadliest hate._'? Is it from a book... a quote or something?"

He eyes me for a few moments before standing and walking up behind me. "It's a quote," he confirms. "From the philosopher Socrates," he says as he places his hands on my hips and he moves hair over my shoulder so he can place a kiss against my neck. "Where did you hear it?" he asks against my skin.

I close my eyes for a moment at the sensation, but then I snap out of it and hand him the paper. "I found this in Blaise's room," I admit. "I just thought it was random and odd to find," I tell him as he takes it and looks it over. "It was in his yearbook."

He eyes it again before placing it on the table.

"That is odd," he says before turning me around and pinning me to the vanity. "I know something that will cheer you up," he says as presses his knee between my legs to part them.

"Oh, yeah?" I joke after he kisses me. Yes, definitely in a better mood. "I feel like this might be more for your benefit," I tell him as his hand creeps up my shirt.

"It works both ways," he jokes.

He turns off the lights as he presses harsh kisses against my lips and I laugh as he pulls me towards the bed. After a few deep kisses, he nearly tears my shirt off. "Someone's impatient," I joke as he quickly takes off his own shirt and throws it behind him before reaching behind me to unhook my bra.

"I don't hear you complaining," he smirks as throws my bra to the side. It makes me laugh again.

"No complaints here," I tell him and I make an embarrassing moaning noise when he kisses me as we fall onto the bed.

It always happens this way. Quickly and with out warning and I don't care one damn bit.

"Didn't think so," he says with a smirk as he lays on top of me. I make myself comfortable against my pillows.

I honestly don't know how he does it, but I have never been so turned on before meeting him. He makes me forget about everything else and just focus on him. He takes his time getting reacquainted with my breasts and I'm practically squirming by the time his hands move south. I stop him before he can unbutton my pants, though, and I can feel his sharp eyes on me as I shake my head.

"Why not?" he asks and I lick my lips.

"It's just today has been a little crazy," I admit as I think about McGonagall... I don't know if it's right to do stuff like that with so much on my mind.

"All the more reason," he replies as he starts undoing my pants anyways. "Besides," he says with a smirk as he pulls the capris down my legs. "I know you want it. I can feel it through the denim."

I blush, but he's probably right.

My knickers come next and I arch my back when he slides his fingers inside of me. I love it when he does this and I'm no longer insecure about my body or my actions when we do this. I'm officially comfortable with him. "Someone's enjoying themselves," he whispers against my ear and the warmth from his breath makes my body tingle.

"Someone's smug," I say breathlessly as I grip the pillow behind my head.

He laughs and bends down to kiss me. I grab the back of his head and hold him there for an intense moment before pushing his hand away and rolling him on his back.

I'm getting bolder in this area.

"What are you doing?" he asks with a twinkle in his eye and I smirk before kissing my way down his chest. He puts his hands behind his head and, when I glance up at him, he smirks. "I like where this is going," he says and I laugh a little before unbuckling his belt slowly. He's already ready to go, and when he thrusts his hips up sharply, I gasp because I wasn't excerpting it.

He thought it was funny of course.

"If you don't want me down here, all you have to do is say so," I tell him as I go to crawl back up to the my side of the bed, but he grabs my wrist.

"Don't be silly," he says and I smirk again before actually grabbing him _there_. Now he's the one arching his back and I get to work doing something with my mouth on a part of his body that I can't actually put together in my mind with out blushing crimson.

After a while, he tugs me up and rolls me over so he's cradled in-between my legs. He kisses me passionately, running his tongue against mine and turning his head every which way as he holds my hands down to the bed, intertwining our fingers in a tight grip. I like how heavy his body feels against mine and how sensitive my breasts are against his skin. Eventually he lets go of one hand and reaches down between our bodies. When I feel him moving his... guy thing... against my... girl thing... I almost panic.

"Sh," he whispers against my lips like he knew I was getting ready to push him away. He moves his mouth down to my neck where he gives me slow, open mouthed kisses at just the right spot. "Just let me do this," he says and I clench my eyes shut.

It does feel good. He's moving against the most sensitive part of my body and it's making my whole body tingle and feel warm. I even find my hips moving against him to intensify the feeling like a slag.

"Can you use your fingers?" I ask in a small voice, embarrassed that I asked but wanting it so badly none the less. He kisses me while he complies to my request and I start feeling that wild build up starting from the core of my body.

I run my fingers through his hair as I suck on his lower lip while my body does amazing things. Then everything goes blank. My mind stops working as I bury my face in his neck and my body starts to explode from the center until it reaches the tip of every limb. I lift my hips up and make an odd mewing noise when I orgasm and Draco kisses me as my whole body relaxes against the bed. I exhale against his skin and I can feel him shiver at the sensation. It makes me smile. He removes his fingers and wipes them on my sheet, which I do my best to ignore.

"You look so sexy when you do that," He says in a deep voice. I would blush if my cheeks weren't already red and I smile against his neck as I try to catch my breath.

I lay back against the pillows again and close my eyes as I let my body come back to earth while he settles himself on top of me again.

And then I feel pressure, and then I feel him starting to move in t_here._

"No," I say quickly as I try to move away from him, getting out of my turned on stupor. "No, not yet," I say breathlessly. I am not ready to have sex with him right now. Even though, deep down... a part of me most definitely wants to. I'm just not at that place yet.

He nods his head rests his forehead against mine for a few moments as he inhales deeply.

"I'm sorry," I add as he moves so he's no longer in between my legs.

"It's alright," he says with sigh and then he kisses my cheek before rolling to my side. "I don't mind waiting."

I turn on my side to stare at him as he throws his arm over his eyes and I bite my lip as I look down at his body. This doesn't seem very fair.

I kiss his shoulder and start crawling down his body again. "You don't have to," he says tiredly as I get into position.

"It's okay," I tell him. "I want to."

When I look up, he's smiling at me and then I go back to doing what I was originally doing before he pulled me up. I think I'm getting better at it because it didn't take him long to finish and when he was done, he pulled me up and cuddled me against his chest, kissing the top of my head in a way that made my heart warm.

I stayed like that for a while in the silence before I tapped my fingers against his chest. "What did Cho have to say to you?" I question again because I really want know.

"Nothing of importance," he says softly and I narrow my eyes in the darkness as I lift my head up to look at his profile.

"You've slept with her," I point out and he shakes his head.

"I never had sex with her," he says and I make a disbelieving sound. "I'm being honest."

"I caught you doing it at Folk Hills," I remind him because he's lying and he rubs his face with his hand.

"I've fooled around with her," he admits with a deep voice. "But I've never had sex with her. I'm highly selective with the people I decide to fuck."

He made that sound special, didn't he?

"Who have you slept with?" I question and he doesn't say anything for a while. "Is it a lot?" I whisper. I already feel way behind in the sex experience department with him. This conversation might just put me back a lot further.

"Does it matter?" he asks and I nod my head.

"Yes, I mean, you know I've never..." I trail off. "I would like to know who you've been with."

"I've honestly only been with two girls," he says like he thought I wouldn't believe him. I thought his count would be higher, to be honest. "I told you I'm very selective."

"Who was it?" I press further and he shakes his head.

"It doesn't matter who it was."

"Yes it does."

"Why?" he counters and I bite my lip. I guess it really shouldn't matter that much to me.

"But you didn't do it with Cho?" I don't know why I'm on that so much right now.

"Definitely not," he says flatly and I find a smile coming to my face as I kiss his shoulder.

"You seem awfully ready to have sex with me," I point out as I mumble against his skin.

"You should take that as a compliment," he says with a smug smile. "I have high standards."

I laugh a little, even though I actually am pleased in some odd way.

"I have high standards as well," I joke as he shifts his body so he's facing me on his side. "I don't just allow anyone into my bed."

"Speaking of that..." he says slowly as he brings his hand up to run up and down my arm. I tuck my feet under his and smile at how sweet we're being to each other. "Do you honestly promise to never cheat on me?" he says softly. "I know I have a jealous mind..." he trails off like he didn't want to admit that. "But I have reasons for it."

"Of course," I reply with a serious frown tilting my lips. "If I wanted to be with someone else, I wouldn't be with you. I would never get on with someone behind your back," I tell him truthfully. "It's mean and disrespectful. I would never cheat on you," I say and it's a promise I know I could hold.

"Would you make an oath?" he asks and it makes me pause for a moment.

"What?"

"That's a tall order to promise such a thing, Ginny. But it's just words," he says as he sits up and reaches around me to take his wand from my night stand. "Would you make a magical oath to guarantee it?"

"No," I say with a head shake as I sit up as well. I know I'm naked right now, but so is he, so I don't feel so exposed. "You should just trust me enough."

"If you're sure of your words then it should be easy," he says seriously and I look over his face in the darkness. I know that french ex girlfriend of his has cheated on him. Did it really bother him that much?

"Will you take it too?" I counter as I think of Cho.

"Of course," he says like it wasn't a big deal and he presses his wand to the palm of his hand until a small red dot glows on his skin. "I don't cheat."

He takes my hand and does the same until the red dot appears on my palm.

"Wait," I say before he makes me shake his hand to secure the magic. "What if we break up?" I ask in a panic because magical oaths are not to be taken lightly.

"Then the contract is void," he says as he looks into my eyes. "But I'm glad you have such high hopes for our future."

"How would the magic know if we've broken up?" I ask suspiciously.

"Do you have another boyfriend lined up?" he asks hotly and I glare at him.

"Of course not, I just want to make sure I know what I'm getting into."

"It's very basic magic," he assures me as he grips my hand in his so the red dots are lined up against each other. "If we were to part ways, the magic would know."

Red light starts to weave it's way around our hands, securing them together. This feels like all kinds of wrong.

"What happens if one of us cheats?" I ask worriedly as the magic starts to sink into my skin.

"Then the other will know it," is all he says and I frown. "Are you ready?" he asks and bite my lip.

"I don't know if this is right..." I say awkwardly and he gives me a fierce glare.

"Do you want to be with me?" he asks and I nod my head.

"Yes, of course."

"Do you trust me?" he asks and I furrow my brows.

"Yes. Apparently more than you trust me," I add and he clenches his jaw.

"This is for both of us," he says seriously. "It will make us both rest easy. Couples do this all the time. Please, just do this for me, Gin," he says softly and my heart melts at the way he said my name.

I nod my head.

He smiles and squeezes my hand.

Then the red light goes away and he lets go of my hand. I bring my hand up to my chest and flex my fingers. "That was it?"

"That was it," he says as he lays back against the pillows.

"How did it know what we were promising?" I ask suspiciously as I lay down beside him.

"It's an oath specifically designed for lovers," he says. "It knows."

Lovers.

Hm.

I lay on my back and stare at my hand for a few more moments. The red lines and dot are no longer there, but I feel like they are. Draco shifts on the bed, so I glance at him. His silver eyes look deeply into mine and he gives me a pleased smile as he kisses my lips.

This may have been a bad idea...

But he kisses _so_ well.

When we wake up in the morning, my mother is pounding on my door. "Ginny!" she calls and I jump awake in a panic only to find Draco casually sitting in a chair, putting on his shirt. He already has his pants on and I look at my own unclothed body before grabbing the sheet and wrapping it around me. "You're going to be late for work if you don't get up right now."

"Her voice is irritating," Draco says in a voice thick with sleep.

"Tell me about it," I whisper as I jump up so I can get dressed.

"Who was that?" she calls from the other side of the door. I go to my closet so I can pick out a dress to wear for work. She tries the handle and, when she realize it's locked, I can hear her huff. "Who is in that room with you, Ginevra Weasley?"

"No one," I answer quickly and I send Draco a glare because he shouldn't have spoken so loud.

"Open the door," she says as I pull a dress from one of my hangers after I hook my bra in place.

"I'm getting ready," I tell her. I shimmy into some clean knickers and then I throw the dress over my head. It's sea foam green and it washes out my skin tone, but I don't care. It's the first one I grabbed.

"I heard a voice that wasn't yours," she says suspiciously as she tries the handle again. "What are you doing in there?"

"I told you, I'm getting ready for work!" I yell in annoyance as I run to my vanity.

I tug a brush through my hair in an attempt to tame it as Draco watches me run around with an amused smile tilting his lips. He puts on his socks like he didn't have a care in the world as pull my hair back into a pony tail.

"Why can't I open your door?" she snaps and I'm sure she's using her wand right now. "Open this door right now," she snaps.

"I'm getting ready!" I hiss again as pull out my cosmetics bag. Draco stands up, and I figure he's going to leave like he should, so I ignore him as I put on my make up. I'm putting on blush when I see him step behind me, smirking at me from the mirror.

"Do you need help?" he asks with a handsome smile as he zips up the back of the dress for me, placing a kiss against my shoulder.

I smile at him and continue to get ready.

"Ah, fuck," I hiss when I poke myself in the eye with my eyeliner and Draco laughs at me. A very deep and obviously male laugh.

"Who is in there with you?" she snaps again and I give Draco another irritated look. "You are not allowed to use magic with out parental permission and boys are not allowed in your room. You know that, Ginny," she says and I roll my eyes. "Now open this door now!"

"Will you just leave?" I hiss in a harsh whisper to Draco.

I push him out of the way as I dive under my bed to find some appropriate shoes, trying like hell to be fast. I just assume that Draco will do the sensible thing and leave my room before my Mother figures out the counter charm to the lock, but he doesn't. When I finally find the shoes and pull myself away from under the bed, I find that he's not headed for the window.

Instead he goes to the door and opens it.

"What are you-" I start in a panic, but he lifts his wand at my mother and performs a spell with a quick flick of his wand.

"Go back to your room," he says and I just kind of freeze with my knees still on the floor because I honestly can't believe I just saw him use a spell on my own mother. "You already came to Ginny's room, you never heard my voice, and you already took her to work. Give it an hour and then start your day," he says in a monotone voice and I watch in amazement as my mother, with glazed eyes, turns right around and walks towards her bed room.

I listen to her footsteps traveling all the way down the hall and then her door shuts.

I drop my shoes.

"What did you just do?" I whisper as he turns around and pockets his wand.

"It was just a memory charm," he says like it was an everyday thing to use. He sits back down on the chair so he can put on his boots. "Stop looking at me like that."

"You can't just curse my mother," I tell him, trying to wrap my head around it as I stand up.

"It was hardly a curse," he says with a smug smirk. "It's a charm and it's perfectly legal."

"Oh my god," I say because I honestly can't think of anything else. When his boots are tied, he stands up to face me. I hate that he's so much taller than me. "Leave."

"You're honestly angry at me for doing that?" he says dryly like I was an idiot. "She was being annoying and she heard my voice anyways."

"So, she's my mother," I snap at him. "She's supposed to be annoying... and you shouldn't even be in my room," I tell him honestly. "She was doing the right thing a Mom should do."

"Why are you freaking out?" he asks and I feel the fire in my veins at his comment. "Now your day will go smoothly thanks to me. It's not like it will have lasting damage on her or anything."

"Would you use a memory charm on your own parents?" I retort and he raises an eyebrow as he grabs his cloak and places it over his arm.

"I wouldn't get that far," he says as he walks towards my bedroom door with the broom under his arm. I guess since he sent my Mom to her room for an hour, he feels safe using the front door as an exit. I'm glad my father goes to work early or I would fear what Draco would do to him. "My parents would flick my wand away before my arm was halfway up."

"Your parents are always ready to get cursed by their son?" I say hatefully because the longer I stand here, the angrier I get. He honestly can't do that to people! Especially my Mom!

"When you come from a family like mine, darling, you are always ready for the worst."

"Go home," I tell him because I feel like I might throw something at him. "Just go away."

"I was planning on it," he says and he strolls over me like he was going to give me a good bye kiss, and when I dodge his attempt he sighs loudly. "You are honestly upset," he says and I nod my head because I definitely am. "Look, what I did wasn't terrible but I'm sorry that it bothered you. I promise to never do it again if it really upsets you."

"I think it should go with out saying that you would never place a spell on one of my family members."

"If any one of your family members found me in your room, would they hex me?" he asks and thinking about it, they probably would. Even my mother has a hot temper that wouldn't be controlled if she saw Draco Malfoy, of all people, in my bedroom. I don't say anything and he continues talking. "I solved this problem easier than if we let it play out."

"You could have just left," I point out and he shrugs.

"But she still would have been suspicious of you and lets be honest, she doesn't exactly trust you. Your parents treat you like a stupid child who needs to wear a helmet and you've resorted to sneaking out and lying to them. That's on them, Ginny, and no one forced me into your room. Like I said, that memory charm was the easiest solution for everyone, but especially for you. I don't want to make your life harder because of me."

Why did that make so much sense to me? I send him a suspicious look because I know I should still be angry but a part of me knows he's right and now a part of me is grateful.

Damn him and his twisted logic.

"Right?" he says after a few moments and I begrudgingly nod my head. He smirks and kisses the corner of my mouth. "Good. I'll call on you later," he says as he starts back to my door. "Oh," he adds as he turns around as an afterthought. "Tomorrow Pansy is going to take you out shopping for a dress," he says and I furrow my brows.

"For what?" is the first of many questions that pops into my head.

"You know that the Debutante Ball is at Malfoy Manor in a week," he says like I would remember. "And I know you don't want me to be there without a date."

"But..."

"She'll get you around noon," he says and I step forward to stop him again.

"I work at..." I was going to tell him that I work at Folk Hills in the morning until well after noon, but he cut me off again with a devilish smirk.

"Noon," he all he says before winking and leaving.

I nearly follow him to question him more, but when I look at the clock I realize I'm late and that Del will have my head if I don't hurry. I slip into my shoes and then I go to the washroom to brush my teeth before hightailing it out of my house.

When I get to Folk Hills, no one says anything to me about being fifteen minutes late and the tongue lashing I was expecting to receive from Del never comes. Instead, my intimidating boss just keeps on walking by my little booth, eyeing me oddly like she had something troublesome she wanted to say to me, but couldn't exactly find the words to say it.

* * *

I'm going to lose my job. I'm getting fired. That has to be what's happening right now.

I clench my sweaty fingers around the arm rest as I look around Del's small corner office. True to form, the place is all neat and tidy with white walls void of pictures and a small wooden desk that's home to three stacks of inbox papers that I figure have to do with the ins and outs of the club. I'm sitting in the chair across the desk, of course, staring at the the rows of keys on the far wall that look menacing to me for some reason.

There's a water heater in the corner and it looks odd and out of place. I suppose Del isn't that far up on the totem poll here.

The only personal artifact in the room is a blue and white chipped coffee mug on the desk with 'World's best Mom' scrawled across it's body.

I wonder how many kids she has.

"Sorry to keep you waiting, Ginevra."

I nearly jump as Del enters the room and I swallow a hard lump in my throat as she closes the door behind her. This can't be good. Between Draco calling in special favors to get me off work and me coming in late once again... I just know I'm going to get the ax. There's only three weeks of summer left before Hogwarts starts up! I'm only so far away from goal for the retreat and I'll need these three weeks pay.

I'm so stupid.

"How was your morning?" she asks as she smooths out her skirt and sits down in the chair behind the desk. She rolls it forward and the sound is loud to my ears.

"It was fine," I say nervously as I start knotting my fingers together. "How was yours?" I ask to be polite and she nods her head.

"Fine as well," she says and then she lets her dark eyes dance across my face like she was trying to read the lines that were there.

It's really quite uncomfortable.

"So, um, why did you want to see me?" I press and she seems to have shaken out of her daze because she blinks a few times and then she fiddles with the paisley scarf that's tied around her neck.

"Oh, yes," she says and then she lets her eyes find mine once again. "I did call you in here for a reason."

"May I ask why I'm here?"I manage to scrounge up enough courage to ask. I really hope against hope that I don't get fired.

"I just wanted to have a talk," she answers as she looks at me with dark lined eyes. Okay, then… "I couldn't help but notice you've made some new friends here," she says slowly.

I gulp when I remember the way she looked at me as I left the club with Daphne and Pansy the first time. "Yes?"

She stares at me for a while and I hold her gaze for as long as possible before it becomes too uncomfortable for me to bear so I put my hands on my lap and look down.

"Would you like to talk about anything?" she asks after a long pause. I give her a puzzled look before shaking my head. I have a therapist, I don't need to divulge anything to my boss. She stares again and then she sighs before rolling her chair closer to the desk. "Listen, I know how things can get sometimes," she says and I'm confused so I knit my brows together. "I've seen girls like you come and go, but I will warn you now that he's not going to marry you."

That was like a punch to the gut. "Uh, what?" is all I can say to that.

"Men can be misleading," she says sourly and I blink a few times because this conversation can not be happening. "Especially rich men," she says seriously. "I would hate for you to get yourself into a situation that you can't get out of. It's a game to them and they're only after one thing."

The silence in the room after her little speech gets very heavy and I have no idea what to say.

"Do you know Nadia does sexual favors for men at the club for money," I say because I don't like that this attention is on me and Draco. I honestly don't think he's like that. I mean, it wouldn't be worth it to keep going as long as he has if he could have someone else, right?

I look down at my right hand where Draco had preformed that magical oath thing and I flex my fingers once more. No, he really does like me.

"I've known many women who've done a lot of things," she quips and I feel like I might be sick. "I just don't want you to get hurt... and hanging out with those high born girls will not work out well for you. Folk Hills is a den full of snakes and you have to watch out or you'll get bit."

"Am I fired?" I ask after another long and awkward bout of silence. I'm only half way through my shift today... I glance at the clock. It's barely noon.

"Do you understand what I'm saying to you?" she asks and I make a face, my anger is starting to show face now and I know I'm going to say something unpleasant.

"Do you not think I'm good enough to be liked by someone like... them," I ask, gesturing to the door behind me. I can't believe I said it out loud, but she is giving voice to my insecurities and I want to stamp them down right away.

"No," she says and my face flushes. "I think you're too good for them," she says as she leans forward. "And you should never forget that fact. Don't be manipulated into anything you don't want to do. You'll only get hurt in the end."

I want to say 'whatever' but I stop myself from saying that painfully teen word as I cross my arms. "So, am I fired or what?" I ask hotly and she sighs as she sits back.

"No, you are not fired," she says. "Right now you have a very important friend," she says as she rolls her chair over to the rows of keys and she picks one off the hook. "You'll no longer be working at the check out counter," she says as she hands me the key. "You'll report to club house five for the duration of the summer. The schedule will remain the same."

"What will I be doing there?" I question as I look down at the brass key in my hand.

She shrugs angrily and picks up a stack of papers to sort through. "Whatever they tell you to do," she says and then she glances at me. "Remember what I told you, Ginny," she says and I bite my lip. She never calls me Ginny. "You're in a den of snakes, but you can walk away any time you want."

Right.

I leave feeling slightly confused and very bothered with that conversation and I can't help but think it over as I head towards club house five. It's inside the actual club, through those thick wooden doors. It's one of the many red roofed buildings located closer to the tennis courts on the eastern side of the estate and it's quite large on the outside. I'm actually nervous to go in because of Del's job description and her creepy warning words.

I see someone approaching me from the corner of my eye before I enter the building, so I glance at them.

It's Pansy and Daphne.

"There you are," she says with a smirk. "We've been waiting for ages," she says as she pushes open the door I had been standing in front of, dreading to go in. "Let's head out."

"Head out?" I question as we step inside.

It's just a great hall, with a large dome ceiling and black marble floors. There are no adjoining rooms, no stairs... and, quite ominously, no windows. The only light comes from torches and there are large tapestries hanging from each wall in the room. I can't even make out the figures of depictions on them, but it makes my insides feel cold.

"Didn't Draco tell you?" she says as she walks towards the center of the building... like this big creepy room wasn't a big deal. "We need to find you a dress."

"But..." I say as I look around. There are no tables or decorations, just the torches and the tapestries and when I look down at the marble floor, I can swear it moved. "But I'm working..." I say as I shake my head out of my daze. This is the right building I was sent to, right? This just seems so strange. There's no one else here.

"Of course you are," Daphne smiles as we stand in the middle of the room. "And your new job is to hang out with us," she says with a smile.

"What is this building?" I ask as I glance down at my key.

"It's an all purpose room," Pansy answers as a long rope starts to fall down towards us from the ceiling.

"I don't understand," I admit and Pansy smiles again. "All purpose for what?" I can never remember the room of requirement ever looking like this nightmare.

"It's whatever you want it to be and right now," she says as she tugs on the rope. "We're leaving!"

"I don't want to lose my job," I say as we land outside of a very posh looking dress shop. I don't know the method of how we traveled here... it wasn't floo and it wasn't apparating. I don't recall pulling a rope as any form of transportation.

They laugh as they start steering me into the shop.

"You belong to Draco now," Daphne says as saleswomen swarm around us. "No one is going to do anything to make you unhappy there."

"I don't belong to anyone," I state with a worrisome frown and she glances at me with a charmingly fake smile.

"Of course," she says as she pats my arm. "A figure of speech, of course."

"Can we get a room please?" Pansy asks one of the girls. "And I want to see that dress on her," she adds, pointing to some yellow thing on the wall.

We end up in a large private fitting room, with me in a very uncomfortable dress. I try on five, complaining the whole time as they try to talk me into actually attending this stupid ball. He didn't even properly ask me anyways. I think he just assumed I would go...

"Of course he assumed," Pansy says with an eye roll as the sales woman walks around me with her wand drawn, fixing and fitting the current dress I'm wearing to my body. "You two are together now, aren't you?" she asks and I bite the corner of my lip.

"I don't know if I can even go," I say as I think of my parents. I would have to sneak out again... to Malfoy Manor... and his father would definitely be there.

"You're going," Pansy says like I was a foolish child. "Stop talking about it. You want to see Daphne and I introduced into polite society, don't you?"

"I don't know," I admit because I don't really get what the big deal is.

"Ginny," Daphne says like I had disappointed her. "This is an important night for all of us and you have people you need to meet," she says. I let the dress I'm wearing get pulled over my head and I sigh when a new one is replaced. "If you're going to be introduced next year-"

"I'm not getting introduced into society or any of that nonsense," I cut her off quickly. "My family doesn't believe in that kind of thing."

"That may be so," Daphne says carefully. "But you have to be introduced. Draco needs-"

"Daphne," Pansy says sharply and I glance in between them as they share a fierce little look.

"Draco needs what?" I ask because I'm not an idiot and I did hear that last bit.

"You may be able to get a sponsor for if you decide you want to come out when you're of age. You will not believe the connections it will give you when you're older," Pansy says. "And, you know, there will be a lot of writers there, ones that you actually know and admire. If you're introduced into society, then the paths are paved for you... Anyways, Ginny, obviously no one can force you to go... but come on. It's an actual ball! When are you ever going to get the chance to go to another one?"

I look away as I think of it. I guess she's right... but these dresses are just ridiculous.

I look down at my right hand and flex my fingers again as I think of that stupid oath spell. "Have you ever had a 'promise not to cheat oath magic thing' placed on you?" I ask and it sounded awkward, but that was the only way I could describe it.

"What do you mean?" Daphne asks as she clicks her fingernails against her knee.

I look at them from the mirror.

"The other night Draco made me do this spell. It was red and it intertwined our hands. It's supposed to be a promise to be faithful, I think... like the other person would be able to know if you were unfaithful. Is that normal?" I ask quietly because I know it was probably stupid.

"Of course it's normal," Pansy says with a serpentine smile. "People in relationships do it all the time."

"I've never heard of it," I admit as I bring my hand up to my chest and I massage my wrist with my other hand nervously. The saleswoman doesn't say anything about it as she works around me, trying to fit the dress better to my body. "It just seems weird. I know that vows and oaths are always dangerous but..."

"It's fine, Ginny. We do it all the time," Pansy bats my concerns away with a wave of her hand. "And good for you for doing that with him. That means the relationship is getting more serious."

"Yeah..." I trail off and bite my lip. "But... you know, what counts as cheating?" I ask seriously. "Like kissing... or sex?" I say with a blush and Daphne purses her lips.

"I think it's any physical contact with any one of the opposite sex that's not a blood relative," she says and Pansy shoots her a look.

"What?" I hiss because if that's what I agreed to, then to hell with that. "What if someone bumps into me? Or if I give a friend a hug?"

"It's not that serious," Pansy says with an eye roll, cutting off my panicked rant. "It's more intimate touches of course... but you wouldn't do anything like that anyways. It's just insurance."

"What happens if someone does cheat?" I ask. I should have found all this out before freaking doing it. "Draco said the other person would know... but I mean... how?"

"It burns," Pansy says with a shrug like it was no big deal. "But love always burns. Anyways, lets talk about something else. I want you to try on a different dress," she says as she snaps her fingers and the saleswoman disappears to get another thing for me to try on.

I don't bring up the oath again, and they don't ask.

I keep on waiting for Pansy to bring up me calling her sister a slut at that party as well, but it never comes up, and I don't bother telling her about it either.

By the tenth dress I was ready to agree to anything just so we could leave.

"This one is very beautiful," the saleswoman walks around me, making adjustments to the dress as I try to suck in my stomach.

"I like that one," Daphne says with a smile. I'm standing on the platform in front of the three way mirror as they all prod and poke at me. I can't afford any of these things. I don't know why I'm even trying. "The gold looks good," she says and I make a face.

"Don't you think gold is a little much?" I ask as I turn to the side. It's strapless with shimmering gold fabric that goes all the way to the floor. The bodice is tighter with a shinier metal material and small green gemstones run along the seams.

"Gold is never too much," Pansy says from her viewing chair and I bite my lower lip.

"I have that black dress you made me buy," I point out. "I could wear that."

Yes, I've decided to actually go. Pansy was right... when am I ever invited to a ball of all places?

"Absolutely not," Pansy says sharply. "That is not appropriate for this kind of party. You need something more formal."

"I'm just not sure if this is me. It's a little too much, if you know what I mean," I say in defense and the saleswoman nods her head.

"Of course, but I like the cut on you," she says as she takes the wand from her pocket and she taps it against her chin. "It's very flattering. Would you like to try it in another color?"

"Oh, what a marvelous idea," Daphne stands up and walks over to me, looking me up and down. "Green would look too Christmas-ish this time of year and it is summer..."

"Try Lavender," Pansy cuts in, and the woman lifts her wand to change the color of the dress, but someone else comes into the dressing room.

"Make it vermilion."

All heads turn towards the door where Narcissa Malfoy is standing, wearing a lovely navy sheath dress and white cardigan tied around her shoulders. My insides freeze as she walks further into the room, eyeing my dress with a curious tilt of her head as she takes off her white gloves and puts them in her small clutch purse.

"Vermilion is the color this season," she says as her high heels tap against the tiled floor. She touches the skirt of my dress and purses her lips. "And I think it would be lovely against her skin tone." She looks up at me and smiles. "It will bring out the color in your cheeks and compliant that lovely auburn hair."

I blush scarlet.

She looks at the saleswoman. "Well?" she says with a delicate eyebrow arched.

"I..." the young woman trails off and blushes. "I don't know exactly what vermilion is, Ma'am," she says in a small voice and Mrs. Malfoy shakes her head as she snaps open her clutch to take out her own wand.

"I'll show you," she says as she points her wand to my dress and then swishes her wrist a few times. My dress turns into an orange-reddish kind of color. It almost looks like a brick red and I look to Pansy for back up, but she's looking at Draco's Mom with a twinkle in her eye. "See, wasn't so hard," she says with a smile, showing white sparkling teeth all straightened in a perfect row.

She puts her wand away again and looks at the other girls in the room as I run my hands over the fabric of the dress, taking in the new color.

"Hello, Pansy, Daphne," she greats with a head nod and they both stand up to give her the obligatory kiss on the cheek greeting. "How are your parents doing?"

"Good, Mrs. Malfoy," Pansy answers.

"Mine are fine," Daphne mutters after and Mrs. Malfoy smiles at them.

Why is she here?

She's making my stomach tie in knots.

"That is good," she says as she steps back and surveys them. "Why don't you two run along. I'll send Ginny out when we're finished."

I gulp and widen my eyes as Pansy flicks a glance at me. Please don't leave!

"Alright," Pansy says with a head nod and then she smiles at my panicked face. "We'll meet up later, Ginny."

They both wave at me and then walk out of the dressing room, shutting the door behind them. "You may go too," Mrs. Malfoy says to the saleswoman who is more than happy to scurry out of the room, leaving me alone with the frightfully beautiful matriarch of the Malfoy family.

She walks around me again until she's standing in front of me and I give her an uncomfortable tight lipped smile because I'm nervous.

"I don't believe we've been properly introduced yet," she says as she holds out her hand for me to shake. I reach my shaky hand out and put it in hers, shaking it limply. Her skin is like ivory and my freckled hand next to hers looks so out of place. "I'm Narcissa, Draco's mother."

"I know," I blurt out rudely and my cheeks redden as I bring a hand up to my neck in nervousness. "I mean, I'm Ginny."

"Yes," she says with a smile as she studies my face with a calculating gaze. "I know."

Right.

"I just happened to walk in a little bit ago and the manager told me that my son's friends were back here. I just had to come and say hello, you understand," she says as she walks around me again to survey the dress.

"It's a pleasure to meet you," I tell her as she studies every inch of me like I was a science fair project.

"Charmed," she says as she takes out her wand again. "You know, this cut is nice on you, but it is a little dated for your youth. How old are you, darling?"

Darling? "I'm sixteen," I tell her and she smiles again.

"Oh, sixteen," she says with a head shake as she takes her wand and starts changing the shape of the dress. "I remember those days fondly."

"Yeah," is all I say like an idiot.

She puts straps on the dress, and changes the bodice into a square neck because she said it looked more 'modern'.

This is so freaking weird.

"My son has told me a lot about you," she says as she starts shortening the hem. "All good things I assure you," she says to my awkward silence. "I find that he is quit taken with you."

"Oh..." that's all I say. I feel like someone has stuffed sand or something down my throat.

"Are you taken with him?" she questions, standing in front of me again and blinking a few times like she was waiting for my answer.

"Uh, yes, I am."

This is painful.

She smiles again, that beautiful smile and she lifts her wand. "Good," she tells me as she starts removing the green jewels from the lining of the bodice. "I would hate for someone to come along and break my boy's heart."

Uh, what?

"I like Draco very much, Mrs. Malfoy," I tell her because I feel like I should and this whole thing feels just weird. If anyone's heart is going to get broken, it will probably be mine.

"I'm pleased to hear that, Ginny," she says as she holds out her hand for me to take so I can step off the platform. "Come here and see," she says as she walks me closer to the mirror. She's a few inches taller than me once I'm on the ground floor and that makes her even more intimidating. I glance at her shoes, three inch stiletto's... no wonder she's so freaking tall.

"Yes, this color is lovely on you," she says as stands behind me while I look in the mirror. "The dress is flattering, but still young and stylish... and it's appropriate for the event."

"It does look very nice," I admit and then she reaches up and takes the hair tie out of my hair, undoing the braid I had it in. My heart freezes again as her slim fingers work their way through my strands.

"You have beautiful hair," she muses as it runs through her fingers. "It's nice and thick and healthy looking."

"Thank you," I say, trying not to sound too freaked out.

"For the event, you're going to want to wear your hair up," she says as she twists my hair around into some fancy looking bun and she holds it in place with her hand. "With a few strands of hair," she says as she starts pulling strands out so they rest around my face along with my bangs. "Free and curled around your face to make a frame."

"Yes," is all I say just so she'll go away.

"I'll refer you to one of my salons," she says and I swallow hard. "I have a girl there that will be able to do your hair perfectly."

She smiles at my reflection in the mirror and lets my hair fall.

"I can not wait to see you in this. Don't wear any jewelry," she adds as an afterthought. "I have the perfect set that will go with this."

"Okay," I say like a fool.

She smiles and squeezes my arm. "It was wonderful finally getting a chance to talk to you. We'll have to do lunch sometime."

"Yeah," I say weakly.

Then she leaves and I'm left staring at this expensive freaking dress that I had no intention of buying. I reach under my arm to get the sales tag and one look at it makes me want to faint. Crap! Now she's going to expect to see me in this next week and I can't bloody afford it and she'll be mad and she has jewelry! I start breathing heavily and I bring my hands up to cover my face. What am I going to do?

"Uh, Ginny?" Daphne peeks her head in the room and when she sees me looking distressed, she comes in. "What's wrong. What happened?"

"Uh, I can't... Mrs. Malfoy practically made this dress for me," I say as I run the fabric against my fingers again.

"It does look wonderful on you."

"Yes, it does," I say quickly. "But, Daphne, I can't buy this dress. She's expecting me to wear it and... she is frightening, by the way!"

"Yeah, she is," she agrees with a sympathetic smile. "Why can't you buy the dress?" she asks seriously and I narrow my eyes. Honestly, she knows my family isn't rich.

"Daphne," I say, my cheeks heating up in embarrassment because I have to say this. "I can't afford this. Even with my savings..." I trail off and my heart starts hammering painfully in my chest. "What should I do? Will she hate me if I show up in a different dress?"

She bites the inside of her cheek again and then she steps back, rummaging through her purse. "Let me buy it for you," she says as she takes out a credit card. "I brought my Dad's just in case."

"No," I state firmly as I shake my head. "No, I don't want you to do that."

"Why not?" she asks like I was being silly. "You can just pay me back later."

I don't think she understands that it would probably take me years to pay her back this amount. I shake my head again. "No... I'll figure out something," I tell her as I try to still my beating heart.

I carefully take off the dress and put my usual clothes back on before Daphne and I walk up to the check out counter.

"Hi," I say to the saleswoman who was helping me earlier. "Is there any chance you could put this on hold for me?" I ask because I have to figure out something. Maybe I can figure out how to make that Vermilion color with my wand and change one of the dresses I already own. Or perhaps I can set up a freaking payment plan with the store.

"Hold?" the woman says as she checks the dress over, putting it on a hanger. "It's already been paid for."

"What do you mean?" I ask slowly as she puts it into a plastic dress bag.

"Mrs. Malfoy said that it's a gift," she says with a large smile as she hands the bag to me. "Do you need anything else to go with the dress today?"

"No..." I trail off with a head shake. "So, wait," I shake my head again. "Mrs. Malfoy paid..."

"For the dress," the saleswoman finishes for me. "Now, you ladies have a good day," she says as she walks away from the counter to help someone else.

"I guess she did like you," Daphne says as I hold the dress in my hand like it was a treasured artifact. "You should write her a thank you letter," she says as her eyes light up. "It would be the proper thing to do. She's probably testing you."

"Why?" I ask in desperation. "What have I done?"

"You're dating her son," she says with a smirk as we start walking out of the store. "And Draco is her only child so she has to make sure you're up to it."

"This is almost too much pressure."

"Oh, don't be silly," she says as we find Pansy window shopping down the street. "It's worth it. Besides, Draco wouldn't let you leave him now anyways."

"What does that mean?" I ask, but she starts walking ahead of me to meet Pansy. I'm left staring at her blond pony tail as it bounces with each step.

Great.

We shop for two more hours and I feel immensely guilty because I'm supposed to be at work right now... but I guess a part of me doesn't care. If this is really what was intended when Del gave me that key, then I guess I should be pleased that I get to do nothing and get paid for it.

Though, it doesn't seem very fair.

I try to hide the dress when my mother picks me up from work and when she asks about it, I tell her that it's a uniform they want me to try on. The lie comes quickly and easily and when she doesn't question me further I feel guilty all over again about lying... and about Draco cursing her memory the other day.

I am so sick of feeling guilty.

In my room, I take out the dress and look at the fine material as I hang it on the back of my closet door. It really is the finest thing I've ever owned and I just stare at it for a while, picturing myself at some fancy ball with Draco in a fancy suit. It's a dream that comes easily and after a while of daydreaming like a child, I pull out a clean sheet of parchment and a newly dipped quill.

_Dear Mrs. Malfoy,_

I start the thank you note formally, thinking it would be best.

_Thank you so much for the lovely dress. I don't think I could ever repay you that kindness and I'm looking forward to wearing it..._

I get stuck there for half an hour with nothing else to write. Mrs. Malfoy had scared the magic out of me today and I have no idea what to say to her in a thank you letter of all things.

I chew on the end of the quill as I stare down at the page and then my eyes shift to the bit of crinkled parchment that's by my ink well. I pause a moment before picking it up and smoothing out the wrinkles. It's the paper I had taken from Zabini's room.

_From the deepest desires often comes the deadliest hate._

Blaise had said that Draco was one of the players and that the chess board was life with it's different players and characters. He does control a lot... Of course, I don't take anything thing Zabini says to heart but I have to wonder...

I look at my right hand again and flex my fingers with a frown on my face.

If Draco is one of the players... who's he playing against?


	7. Chapter 7

"Are you nervous?"

"Of course I'm nervous."

"You don't have to be," he reassures me. "Now, I'm going to push. I don't want you to freak out, okay?"

I nod my head and close my eyes.

"Open your eyes," he scolds and I exhale slowly before opening them. "Just remember what I told you and everything will be fine."

"Okay," I say in a small voice. When he pushes my boat out so it's gliding on the river, I try not to panic. "What if I fall out?" I ask in fear as I peer down at the green water that is way too close for my comfort.

"This is a very calm river," he says as I use the paddle to control the movement of the boat just like he told me. "There is barely any white water here and I made you wear that life jacket for a reason... you couldn't drown even if you wanted to."

I tug on the bulky blue vest before putting my hands on the long paddles on each side of the boat like he taught me. "Why aren't you wearing one?" I ask in suspicion. He's just wearing a pair of shorts and a cotton slytherin house t-shirt. "What if you fall in?"

"I can swim," he says like I was a fool for asking. "And the water isn't very deep."

"Is this why you wanted to teach me how to swim?" I ask cautiously as I start paddling the boat through the water, following Draco down the river as I try to balance myself in the small kayak so it doesn't tip.

He nods and then smirks at me. "Yes, but I got distracted when I saw you in that swim suit. So a life jacket will have to do."

When I showed up to that weird club house five today at Folk Hills, Draco was waiting for me with a smirk on his face. I questioned him about my job and what I was supposed to be doing, but he just shrugged me off and Apparated us to some outdoor rec park that I've never heard of. He rented two small boats and a life jacket before walking us down to this freaking river and making me get in after a short lesson on boating.

"Are you sure my things are going to be okay?" I ask cautiously. He had taken my bag and heels and hid them along with his messenger bag among some trees. He promised me no one would be able to find them after he put a concealment charm on them, but I'm still nervous about it. My whole life is in my bag.

"Ginny, I'm a perfectly competent wizard," he says like I had offended him. "I can perform a concealment charm, thank you," he snaps and I nod my head as we travel along. "What do you think so far?" he asks as I try to steer the boat around a tree branch in the water.

I take a second to look around once the menacing branch is behind me. The river is surrounded by tall, thick trees that are heavy with green summer foliage, and there are crumbling rocks on the banks. A few birds fly over head and I shield my eyes from the sun as I watch their progression across the sky.

"It's pretty out here," I point out. The day is beautiful and the weather is perfect for out door play. Not too hot and not too cold. Just perfect. "I don't think I hate this so much," I say and he laughs.

"Well, I'm glad you don't hate it," he says with a smile. I smile back, enjoying the way he looks when he smiles. It makes my stomach flutter in a wonderful way and I'm reminded again about how much I like him.

We seem to be the only people out on the water today, and I let the current take us down stream as Draco and I talk.

"I read in the paper that your brother and Potter were in Knockturn Alley a couple of days ago," he says as he rows beside me.

"Yeah?" I say as I try to make my boat go to the right because I keep on leaning uncomfortably to the left.

If I fall in, I swear I might die.

"Yes," he says. "The paper said they looked very upset and they quoted some unnamed source that admitted they had been missing all summer. I didn't realize they weren't around," he adds and I glance at him. He's wearing those thick rimmed sunglasses so I can't see his eyes.

"They left the night before my birthday," I admit because I'm still bitter about it. I put the paddle on my lap and let the current take me as I fix my head band. My bangs keep getting in my eye, so I pull it all back. "Harry, Ron, and Hermione just up and left without telling anyone. They had my parents worried sick for them."

"What were they doing?" he asks and I shrug my shoulders before picking up the paddle again.

"They never tell me anything," I say honestly. "I don't care what they're doing."

When I look at him again, he smiles.

"When you were reading the paper, did you also notice the article about McGonagall?" I ask with my jaw tight. "They said it was robbery gone wrong." Just like the Order had said.

"Yes, I saw that," he says seriously. "How did you know before the papers did?"

"If it was a robbery gone wrong, then where is her body?" I question, ignoring his inquest. "Why hasn't anyone asked that question?"

"How did you know that information?" he presses again as we pass through a section that's totally shaded by the tall trees.

"You know that my family believes that you-know-who is back," I say because I don't feel safe saying his name out in the open like this. "They have people over," I say, trying to be careful, but wanting to talk to someone about it. "They know things."

"My parents have meetings too," he says in a deep voice as he stares at me. "They know things as well."

"Do you spy on them like I do?" I ask and he smirks at me.

"I don't have to," he says and before I can question him further, he cuts me off. "Make sure you go to the right here," he says as he starts turning his boat that way. I follow him because there's a big rock protruding from the lake bottom. His t-shirt is Slytherin green with silver writing and the back of his shirt has his last name printed towards the top. It looks comfortable. "My mother says that she invited you to come to the Manor earlier than intended." he says and I nod my head as I think about her.

"Yes, she came to one of the shops where I was trying on dresses. She's very intimidating," I add and he glances at me. "I'm nervous about it... what happens at Debutant balls?" I question.

"Well, the girls get introduced by their fathers and then there's a lot of dancing," he says and my boat starts swaying towards the left again, where a large tree branch is sticking out right at head level. I try to paddle away. "My Mom turned it into a charity event, of course, so they'll have dance cards that people will donate money to be on," he says.

"I'm going to run into this thing," I say in a panic, because I'm not listening to what he's saying and the water is making waves, pushing me towards the tree branch. "Draco, I'm going to hit it!"

"Calm down," he says with a laugh. "Just duck your head when you get close."

I bend down when I'm by it and sigh in relief when I survive. I exhale slowly and try to paddle my way back.

"Now, do you see that rippling water up there?" he asks, nodding ahead of us. I nod my head. "I want you to follow my lead. There's a small drop off there, so you have to go into the middle and immediately get to the right side," he says. "Just follow me, right?"

"Right," I say with a head nod. "What kind of dancing?" I ask to get back on track. I can't picture misses Malfoy grooving to modern music, to be honest.

"Formal dancing," is all he says as he rows in front of me in his sleek green boat. "You don't have to worry too much about it," he adds. "The songs that have actual steps, we can sit out if you don't know them and I'll be leading you in the rest. You don't have to fret. Pay attention, now."

I try to pay attention, I really do, but the small drop off looks more like a small waterfall and it made me panic. I nearly screamed as my boat flopped over it and I was too preoccupied with not tipping over, that I forgot to paddle to the right like Draco had said and I got stuck on one of the rocks.

"Really?" I hear him sneer sarcastically from a few feet away as I try to get the boat to move. No, it's definitively stuck. "You would," he says as he hops out of his boat to come rescue me.

He holds onto his boat and swims towards me to give me a push. After I'm back on the water, he pulls his boat onto the rock so he can get back in. "I'm sorry," I say as I start paddling away. I watch him get himself off the rock and paddle beside me again.

"It's your first time," he says. "I can't expect you to be a professional."

"How long is this river?" I ask with a serious frown because my arms are starting to hurt.

"This river runs a long way," he says and I make a face. "But we're getting off in three miles. I don't understand how you can be so nervous about this, but you can ride a broom miles from the ground like it was nothing."

"I can't drown in the air," I point out and he shakes his head.

We row in silence for a while, before I start thinking about Del and the club. "Is it right that this is happening?" I ask and he puts his glasses to the top of his head, finally letting me see his eyes. "I mean, I should be at work."

"Summer's almost over. I wanted you to enjoy it," is all he says as I paddle along beside him.

"It just doesn't seem fair to anyone else."

"Would you rather be there behind that counter?" he asks sharply and I shake my head.

"It just doesn't feel right," I say as I think about my talk with Del. "And... I don't want people thinking bad things about me." I admit in a soft voice and he scoffs.

"If people think bad things about you, it's probably because they're jealous." he says and then he gives me a charming smile. "Not everyone can have an amazing boyfriend like you do."

"Yeah," I say dryly. "Amazingly pompous."

"But you love it," he says as he puts his sunglasses back down and faces forward.

More than he probably knows, actually.

When the run was done, Draco helped me get out of the boat and he carried them both to shore as I sat in the grass. I was almost proud of myself for not tipping the boat, or having a panic attack on the water. I feel like I'm a step closer to getting over that particular fear.

Yay for me.

"We have some time before we head back," he says as he pulls out his wand from his pocket and waves it a few times until our bags appear. He dries his clothes and pulls out a blanket from his satchel, setting it on the ground. I watch him curiously as he pulls an apple out and cleans it with his shirt before sitting on the blanket, leaning his back against a tree. "Come here."

I crawl over to him and sigh when I reach the blanket. It's soft and way more comfortable than the grass.

"Have you told your parents about me yet?" he asks as I sit between his legs. He props his feet up on either side of me as he takes a bite from the apple.

I snort. "No," I answer honestly as he chews. "They would lock me up forever. I wish our parents didn't hate one another. It's so stupid."

"Do you even know why our families hate each other?" he asks as I lean against his chest and place my hand on his knee. I shake my head.

"Do you?" I ask as I play with the edge of his shorts. I grab the apple from him and take a bite on the untouched side.

"Yes, I know everything," he says I can practically feel him smirking.

"It's silly to have a blood feud that no one but you remembers," I admit after I swallow and he laughs. It rumbles in his chest against my back.

"It's part of our history," he says as he takes my free hand and holds it up against his. Of course, his is much bigger than mine and I muse about the difference as he continues to talk. "It's actually an interesting story."

"Could you tell it to me?" I ask as I thread my fingers through his. I take another bite of the apple. I was hungry... I'm glad he brought a snack.

"It started with some stupid dispute over land rights centuries ago when both our families were the prominent pureblooded lines at the time," he says as I get more comfortable in his embrace. "There was a section in the black hills that both our families claimed and for years they squabbled over it until it turned deadly. Each generation would have duels, then there would be retaliation, and then peace, but it always came back to that little bit of land."

"What was so great about that land?" I question. I feel like he's telling me a bed time story or something.

"It supposedly was one of those pockets of pure magic," he says and I crinkle my nose at the myth. Every magical child is brought up hearing about the caves that are so full of magic that you could have your wildest wish come true if you said the right words. It's all fairy tales, though, and no one actually believes that anymore. "And you can imagine how both sides would want that."

"Naturally," I say with a smile as I bring his hand up to my lips and I kiss his knuckles.

"So, they fought for years over this land until both sides decided that they had enough." He squeezes my hand. I bite into the apple again and chew. "You are aware that you're family is known for it's powerful witches," he says and then he peeks his head around to see my face. I shrug as I swallow and he shakes his head as he takes off the sunglasses. He places them in the grass beside us as I lick my lips. "Honestly, how do you not know anything about your linage?"

"I don't know," I say in defense. "Apparently your family kept better records."

"Do you even know what your coat of arms is?" he asks and I shake my head. "Ginny, honestly. How can you not know these things? You have such a rich heritage. Why wouldn't your parents tell you?"

"I guess they didn't know either," I counter.

He rolls his eyes. "Prepare for a history lesson, then," he says and it's my turn to roll my eyes. "Your family was once very wealthy and very powerful," he says as he rests his chin on my shoulder. "But it was known for giving birth to powerful daughters."

I bite my lip as I look out ahead of me. We're facing the river we just rowed down, and the water is rippling with the wind.

"In a time when women were just there to have babies, your family really churned out some respected witches that did amazing things in terms of spells and wand work," he says and I smile at the thought. "Anyways, so our families decided to come to a peace agreement and what better way to seal two families together then with..."

"Marriage," I cut in because I know where this is going.

"Exactly. So my ancestor, Lancaster Malfoy, was engaged to your ancestor, Miriam."

"You even know their names," I say with a smirk because I'm taking this whole story with a grain of salt.

"Of course I do," he smirks and I look at the apple, deciding if I want more. "Miriam was the youngest and most beloved daughter in your family," he says as he runs soothing circles on my thigh with his right hand. I wore a yellow sundress to work today, and it was cut just above my knees. "And Lancaster was the heir after his older brother died of Dragon Pox."

"Charming," I say and he shushes me.

"He courted her and fell in love. She was allegedly very beautiful," he says and then he places a gentle kiss against my neck. He starts bunching up the skirt of my dress, revealing more of my thighs. "Like you," he adds and I blush as he kisses me again before pulling away. "Of course, marriage contracts and agreements like that between families aren't as flimsy as they are today. If you entered one, it was basically set in stone and there was no way out."

"Did she love him?" I ask since I'm starting to get very interested in this fairy tale. I try to ignore the climb of his hands up my legs, but I can't, and I can feel my body starting to respond agreeably.

He shrugs. "I suppose not because the night before their wedding, she ran off and eloped with a muggle."

"Oh," is all I say as I make a face. "That didn't go over well, I imagine," I say and he laughs.

"Correct. Lancaster was so upset with the turn of events that he rode out that night to retrieve her. When he found them shacked up in some small tavern... he tore them both to pieces."

I make a face and sit up so I can face him. He sits further back against the tree to give me more room as I turn my body towards his.

"To pieces?" I say with an eyebrow raised.

He nods. "I'm talking total dismemberment. He took their body parts and scattered them across the village," he replies and I make a disgusted face. "He felt betrayed. His pride and honor was in jeopardy and that's all a man has at the end of the day."

"So he dismembered her?" I say incredibly with a head shake. I resume my spot with my back against his chest. "That doesn't seem like the most positive thing to do to the woman you love."

"I think your family saw it that way too," he says with a smirk as he takes the apple from me, taking a large bite. He swallows it before continuing. "They were so distraught with his actions that they burned down the village around my families home, killing hundreds and murdering five family members in the process."

"Fun," I say sarcastically and he smiles at me as he moves hair over my shoulder so he can place a kiss right where my neck meets my shoulder.

"They say that Lancaster found that pocket of magic before your ancestors came to kill him," he says. His right hand starts creeping up my thigh again until his fingers find the edge of my knickers. "He cursed your family so that no powerful witch would ever be born to break another man's heart like Miriam had broke his."

"He tore her apart, for Christ sakes," I say with a laugh as he traces the outline of my underwear and I try to ignore how turned on my body is getting. "Obviously he was a creep or she wouldn't have run off with that muggle."

"Will you let me finish," he says as he rubs me... _there_.. and I lift my hips. "So, anyways, he cursed your line, our families were nearly wiped out from the blood shed, and your house eventually fell into ruin... We've hated each other ever since."

I pause for a moment. "That was a delightful story," I say with a laugh and then I bite my lip when he slips his fingers under my knickers.

"I don't think it's just a story," he whispers in my ear. How did he make that sound sexy? I guess it's because he's running his fingers against the most sensitive spot on my body. "There's some truth in there."

"Hardly," I say breathlessly. I look out ahead of me, at the trees and the sun and the sky. We're outside... anyone could be watching. I put my hand on his wrist and pull his fingers away as I close my legs.

He doesn't say anything as I scoot away and face him, trying to continue the conversation like the whole 'touching my private spot' thing didn't happen.

"Obviously there was no curse. I'm here, aren't I?" I say with a smile and he leans forward.

"When was the last time a girl was born into your house?" he asks seriously and I open my mouth before clamping it shut. I know I'm the only girl to be born into the Weasley family for generations, but I'm sure it doesn't go back that far.

"What does that mean, then?" I ask and he throws the half eaten apple in the lake. I turn to watch it splash in the water, but Draco surprises me by pushing me on my back and settling himself on top of me when my legs scoot out in front of me.

"That means that the seventh moon is in the second house," he says and I furrow my brows as he pushes my legs apart so he can settle between them after hiking up my dress. I think I've heard that before.

"What?" I say as I try to sit up and place where I've heard those words, but he presses his hips into mine, keeping me in place.

"You were made for me," he says as he looks over my amused, albeit, slightly confused face. "That means," he says as he leans in closer and levels his silver eyes with mine. "That you're mine."

I laugh at that. Honestly, he said it so seriously. He reaches down to kiss me and I smile against his lips. "Is this how you get all the girls?" I ask in between kisses and he laughs a little as well.

"All girls get their knickers wet over a good blood feud story."

"Well, if I ever run off with a muggle, please promise me to try to talk it out before you cut me to pieces," I joke and he kisses my jaw.

"If you ran off with a muggle there would be no talking," he says against my ear. I laugh that one off as well... a bit more nervously, though. "I would never allow that."

I snort.

"Like you have much say in what I do," I say with a good nature eye roll and he pulls back to look over my face.

"You have say in what I do," he says seriously as he rolls his hips against mine so I can feel his very prominent arousal. "I would expect the same from you."

I don't have an answer for that, so instead I bring my hand up to his his face, running my thumb over his lips and jaw. "Don't look so serious, babe," I say gently. It was the first time I had used a pet name with him and I was kind of nervous saying it out loud... but it made him smile and he leaned down to kiss me again.

I sink further back against the blanket with my eyes closed while a soft sigh leaves me. I remove my head band and throw it in the grass to get comfortable as his fingers slip through my hair. It feels good and I wrap my legs around his waist to bring him even closer.

"Sweet little Ginny," he whispers against my ear after a rather long and lengthy snog session.

"What?" I ask breathlessly, because I'm not exactly thinking straight.

"Remember how good my fingers feel inside of you?" he asks with a smirk as he runs his fingers in between my legs. I'm wearing a dress of course, so there's no protection between my knickers and him. "Imagine how the rest of me feels," he says sinfully and I blush.

"That's a bold statement," I joke nervously and he looks at me more seriously.

"One I can live up to, I assure you," he says with a straight face and darkened eyes. It rattles me and my body starts tingling. "When you finally give yourself to me, you will not regret it."

I believe that.

I inhale a shaky breath, really thinking about saying yes.

"What time is it?" I ask cautiously because I'm scared that I want to actually do it with him right now.

"It doesn't matter," he says.

We start getting hot and heavy again and I don't even protest when he starts to pull down the front of my dress... and then we hear thunder and then clouds cover the sun.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me," he says as it starts to sprinkle and he glares up at the sky like it would change it's mind.

I take his arm and look at his watch.

"We need to head back anyways," I say as I tap the face of the Rolex. "It's almost time for my shift to be over."

I'm a little relieved it started raining, actually.

With a disappointed sigh, he sits back on his knees and watches me as I right my clothes. I go to sit up as well, but he puts his hand on my stomach to keep me in place. He's looking at me quite intensely and I furrow my brows because of it.

"You were going to say yes, weren't you?" he says thoughtfully as he looks into my eyes.

I blush again and push his hand off so I can stand up. "You'll never know," I joke but he doesn't laugh. "I want to," I admit uncomfortably because he keeps on looking at me like he wanted me to talk. "I just... don't want it to be too soon."

He doesn't say anything, he just nods his head and folds up the blanket. I put my bag over my head to keep my hair from getting wet as he gathers up his things and lifts his wand towards the boats so he can magically transport them back to the warehouse where he had rented them.

"We have to get to the Apparation point," he says as he takes my hand. "It's down this path," he explains as we start walking in the light rain. I nod my head.

Halfway towards the designated App spot, Draco's wand gets swiped from his pocket. He stops walking and pushes me behind him... then my bag gets magically tugged out of my hands and it zooms towards the trees. Draco's satchel is tugged on, but since it's strapped across his body, it doesn't get very far.

"What?"

"Sh," is all he says as his eyes scan the trees.

It starts raining a bit heavier, coming in at an odd angle that hurts my eyes.

I don't like that he doesn't have his wand anymore and I'm actually kind of afraid when a thin, scraggly man walks out of the trees, holding up a crooked wand. He looks homeless, honestly. His clothes look drab and ill fitting, his hair and beard are long and unkempt... and his eyes are wild. They keep darting around us like he was waiting for someone to jump out and kill him.

"Give me your bag," he says in a rough city accent and I crinkle my nose as I hide behind Draco a bit more. The rain makes mud of the dirt underneath us and my feet start sinking into the ground. He looks Draco over as the rain pelts us and he jabs his wand. "And that watch. Hand it over now, kid."

"Do you have any idea who you're talking to?" Draco asks in a calm, but stern, voice and I furrow my brows as my heart pounds against my chest.

"I don't care who ya are," he says as he puts Draco's wand between his teeth so he can rummage through my bag.

My heart falls into my stomach as he pulls out my things and he throws my notebook in the grass like it was nothing. I watch as rain drenches it and I nearly start crying. Draco goes to take a step forward, but the man jabs his wand towards us again and I grip his arm. I wouldn't pass it by him to curse us judging by how crazy he looks right now.

When he finds my change purse, his eyes light up and he puts that in his dingy pocket... and when he finds my actual bank card, I make a gasping noise as I imagine my savings... everything I've worked so hard for since I was thirteen.. gone in seconds. If we make it out of this intact, I have to go straight to Gringotts to cancel it before he does too much damage.

"Get my fucking wand out of your mouth, you disgusting ingrate," Draco hisses and the man levels him with a wild glare.

"You shut your mouth," the man hisses after putting Draco's wand in his breast pocket. "I swear I'll curse you. Now give me that bag... and you," he says, nodding towards me. "Give me those earrings."

I would snort if I wasn't so scared. These earrings are cheap and worthless.

"I am going to give you one more chance to give me my wand back," Draco says darkly. "I suggest you listen to me."

"You don't tell me what to do, boy," the man wheezes. Draco slides the satchel over his head and hands it to me.

"Hold this," is all he says and I take it with shaky hands.

He starts walking forward again, and the man drops my bag and shoots a curse right at Draco's heart. I scream and cover my mouth as it hits him, but instead of falling... or being shocked into inaction... it seems to have had the opposite affect on Draco. He lunges at the man, knocking the wand out of his hand as he wrestles his small form to the ground. The man tries to fight him off in vain... he's no match for Draco's size and youth.

I watch with wide eyes as Draco easily overpowers the man's frail body and he starts beating him against the head and chest with frightening precision. The rain stops for a little bit and I stand rooted to my spot as Draco punches the man without mercy, busting up his face until it's unrecognizable.

The sound of knuckles hitting skin and the moaning noise the man keeps making is making me feel ill.

"Do you have any idea who I am?" Draco hisses as he ruthlessly punches the man underneath him. "Do you have any fucking idea who you just messed with?"

"Draco," I say worriedly because the man has stopped moving and making noises. His face looks like uncooked meat and I have to stop myself from gagging. "Draco, stop."

He doesn't stop, he just keeps going. I fear he might actually be trying to kill the man. I step forward to stop him, but he seems to have caught on because he stops himself and sits back. He shakes out his right hand like it was hurting him... I suppose it would after the beating he just gave, and he stands up. I take tentative steps towards them as he digs his wand out from the man's front pocket.

I'm almost relieved when the guy on the ground moans and tries to turn on his side. That means he's not dead, thank god.

Draco cleans off his wand with the edge of his shirt and then he levels it at the man's chest. The cold look he has in his eyes is frightening... there's nothing there... no emotion, no warmth... just darkness that makes me terribly uneasy. He licks his lips and tilts his head to the side as he looks the man over and then he starts to flick his wrist around to start a curse. I widen my eyes again and run over to him, placing my hand on his arm.

He snaps his head towards mine. "Don't," is all I say with a head shake. I don't know what he was going to do, but judging by that hateful look in his eye... I doubt it could be good.

His eyes dance across my face and that iciness in his expression seems to be melting the slightest bit. "I can't hear you," he says dryly and that's when I notice his ears... they're bleeding.

I touch the blood that's running down his neck and I show him my fingers. It must be a side effect from that curse the man hit him with.

His eyes inflame again. He turns back to the man and kicks him in the side. I gasp once more as my hands start shaking. I've never seen anything like this before and it's scaring me to death. Draco glances at me once again and, when he notices how shaken I am, he sighs.

"Get your things," he says in a louder voice than normal.

I obey his order and gather up all of my possessions, stuffing them into my rain soaked bag. Out of the corner of my eyes I see Draco bending down and reaching into the man's pocket to retrieve my coin purse and bank card... I sigh in relief when I see it and I try not to be too upset when I pick up my ruined notebook. I try to peel the pages apart, only to see the ink all run together and blotched. All that time I spent writing in this notebook is pointless now.

I feel my eyes tear up, but I swallow the pain and stuff it in my bag. At least it was the new one that Hermione had given me for my birthday, so there wasn't too much lost. Draco points his wand at the man's chest again and before I can stop him he flicks his wand a few times, performing a familiar charm.

I'm familiar with it because I saw him use it on my mother.

"A group of muggles beat you up after they saw you doing magic in the forest," Draco tells the man who's under his memory removable charm. "You never saw me and you never saw her," he says, nodding towards me. He picks up the man's wand from the ground and snaps it in half. I flinch. "You should have listened to me," he adds hatefully before dropping the two halves of the broken wand on the man's battered chest.

Then he turns to me and hands me my card and purse.

I put it in my bag and look at the man as he moans on the ground. He looks terrible. "Come on," Draco says as he grabs his satchel from my shaking hands and he takes my hand.

I reluctantly let myself get pulled away as I hike up my bag on my shoulder. When we reach the safe app zone, I look down the path where the man is rolling on his side.

"Should we tell someone he's there?" I ask worriedly. He is beaten pretty terribly.

"I can't hear you, Ginny," Draco says in a louder than normal voice because he can't hear how loud he's actually being. "We're leaving."

Because of the curse, I assumed we would be going to St. Mungo's so Draco could get looked at. I was confused when we popped to Folk Hills and I give him a curious look as he dries my clothes and hair.

He glances down at me with his jaw tight and twitching.

"Your shift is over," he says and I open my mouth to respond, but he cuts me off. "I'll see you later."

"But..."

He puts his hand up to my face, running his thumb over my jaw. "I know this curse. I'll be fine," he says seriously before pulling back.

Then he pops away and I just stare at his empty spot for a few moments. It can not be good to have your ears bleeding... and that man... what if he dies?

"There you are," I hear my mother's voice and I turn around reluctantly. "We usually meet by the stairs," she says as she gives me a tight lipped smile. "Are you ready?"

"Yeah," I say with a head shake as I send another reluctant look to where Draco popped away. "I'm ready."

Pansy and Daphne had warned me about how intense Draco could get. I think I've only witnessed mild doses of it until today. That look he had in his eyes when he was beating that man...

It gives me chills just thinking about it...

When we get home I try to ignore the nagging feeling in the back of my mind that's warning me to run away now. To get away from Draco and everything I had built this summer, but I can't listen to that voice now. It's just the scared naive part of me, right? I'm supposed to be brave.

When I awake the next morning, that man in the forest is front page news.

A group of passing wizards found the beaten man's body that night, laying right where we had left him. The paper had called it a muggle/wizard hate crime and people were all up in arms about it. It triggered a debate on muggle/magical relations once more and the man, who's name I learned was Milton Harolds, was seen as a sympathetic figure as opposed to the dirty thief he was. Thankfully he didn't die, but he did suffer terrible injuries. He had severe head injuries, three cracked ribs, broken fingers, and two of his teeth had been knocked out. All of that was because of Draco and I just couldn't wrap my head around it without feeling sick.

I couldn't eat my breakfast as I read the article and when my mother asked me what was wrong... I told her I was tired.

And it was true. I suddenly felt very _very_ tired.

* * *

"Ah, muggles," my father says fondly as he puts his collection of spark plugs into a card board box. "What wonderful creatures they are," he says with a sigh.

He just got finished telling me how awesome technology is and I listened dutifully... because I had no choice.

I roll my eyes as I pack up some odd looking wire things into another box and labeling it with green marker. I literally write 'odd looking wire things' on the lid before sliding it to the side. I agreed to help my father clean out the shed this afternoon and I'm glad to have the break from the constant chattering of my Mother. I had the day off and she's been following me around like it was her job which I found highly irritating.

Dad was a better option. Even if I had to help him organize all his muggle crap.

"Know what I mean Ginny bean?" my dad sings and I smile at him.

"Yeah, I know what you mean," I tell him as I start gathering up the old computer monitors my father had been collecting the past two years and putting them in against the wall.

"So," he says he wipes his forehead off with the back of his arm. "What's new with you, huh? I feel like we haven't spoken in a while."

I shrug because I can't really tell him anything that is actually up. "Nothing really," I say softly and he smiles at me.

"Your mother tells me you have a boyfriend."

I drop one of the monitors and it breaks against the ground.

"Are you okay?" he asks in a panic as he runs over to me and cleans the mess with his wand.

"Yeah, I'm okay," I say with a head shake as I help him lift the mended monitor back to the table. "I'm fine. I'm sorry."

"Accidents happen," he says and then he smiles at me. "So, about this boyfriend..."

"Why would she say that?" I ask nervously as I avoid his eyes and he laughs.

"She said you had 'the smile'," he says making air quotations. "So... who's the lucky guy?"

He asks and I bite the corner of my lip. I can't lie half as well to my father. "Does he work with you at the club?"

I nod my head, giving in and not wanting to lie too much to him. "Wait," I say as I bite the corner of my lip a bit harder. "I met him at Folk Hills," I admit because I'm tired of lying to my parents. They will have to meet Draco eventually, right? "He doesn't work there," I mutter and my father knits his brows together.

"Who is it?" he asks carefully as he cleans the lenses of his glasses on his old shirt.

That I can't admit right now. "I'd rather not say right now," I say and when he tilts his head curiously, I rush to make it not sound so bad. "I mean... it's just I don't want everyone knowing because you know how mom and the boys are..." I say as I think of my brothers and he nods his head in understanding. "I'll tell you when the time is right. It's not too serious now," I lie and he nods his head.

"You know, whoever it is, you don't have to hide him from me," my Dad says seriously. "He can come over to dinner any time you like."

Yeah... right...

"Is he your age?" he asks carefully.

"He's in Ron's grade," I admit as I start moving the monitors again. "He goes to Hogwarts and he's really smart," I add for good measure and my father smiles at me.

"Does he have all his teeth?" my dad asks and I laugh because he's being goofy.

"Of course he does."

"And you like him?"

"Yes," I say with a smile. "I like him very much."

"That's important," he says with a head nod. "Is he the reason you've been sneaking out so often?"

If I was holding something... I probably would have dropped that as well.

"What?"

"Ginny," he says seriously. "I'm not stupid... and I hope that you're not either," he says.

I blush and look down.

"I remember what it was like to be your age and I know I can't stop you from doing something you really want to do. I can understand," he says as he shakes his head. "Your mother and I... well, we want you to be safe and I think we've sheltered you a bit too much. Much to your disadvantage," he says like he was working through it. "I just want you to make good decisions."

"I am," I say in a small voice... only half believing that. "Does Mom know?" I ask nervously. "That I've been... you know... leaving the house every now and then?"

"Ah, no," he says as he goes back to his spark plugs. "You probably would have bars on your window if she knew," he says and I snort in laughter.

"I don't think she's that extreme," I say jokingly and he flicks me a glance.

"We're talking about the same woman, right?" he says and we laugh at the thought. "You know," he says after a few moments of it hanging in the air. "It wouldn't hurt for you to be a little bit nicer to your mother," he says and I make a face because she's been annoying me so much lately. "She just cares about you so much and she's so stressed out with Ron gone and the Order meetings... You have to be understanding."

"Of course," I say sourly and he gives me a side smile.

"The tension has been so thick in the house and I just want it all to go away," he says with a sigh. "We all have a lot on our minds. Speaking of which," he says as he eyes me. "I have to wonder why you haven't bothered to ask me about the Order meeting in our kitchen."

I shrug.

"Is it because I didn't successfully get rid of every stupid extendable ear the twins felt compelled to give everyone under the age of seventeen?"

I smile a little, part ashamed and part amused.

"I'm almost of age," I point out lightly and he nods his head.

"I know you are," he says and when I look at him I realize how old my father has gotten. He's wearing a white t-shirt with dirty slacks and the wrinkles around his eyes seem deeper than ever. For some reason I feel guilty for it. "It seems like yesterday you were just a little thing with bright hair hanging off my leg."

He smiles wistfully and I raise an eyebrow. "You make me sound like some kind of odd growth," I joke and he laughs as he shakes his head.

"Just be safe, yeah?" he says and I nod my head. "Now is a dangerous time and I know I can't stop you from doing something you really want to do... but have a good head on your shoulders about it."

"I know," I whisper and he nods his head decisively.

"How about some music?" he says as he pulls an old carton of records out from under the table. They were banished here by my mother who refused to let Dad play them in the house anymore. He picks one out and puts it on the old player in the corner, putting the needle down as it starts spinning. The music starts to blare from the speakers and we go back to cleaning the place up in relative silence.

"Dad?" I ask after most of his things are boxed up and categorized. I've become distracted by the music. It's large band music... dancing music...

"Huh?" he asks as he dusts off a rather odd looking telephone thing.

"Do you know how to dance?" I ask as I think of the ball at the Manor. "I mean... like formal dancing? I mean, the ones that have steps that people would dance to at a ball or something like that," I say as I remember Draco mentioning them.

He wrote me after the incident in the forest with the mugger. He said that he was fine and that I didn't have to worry about him. Then he went on to talk about the ball and what was expected of me... it was a little overwhelming, actually.

"I know a few," he says as he stands up straight. He names off a few dances that he actually knows and my eyes light up.

"Would you teach me?" I ask because I want to impress Draco.

"I didn't think you kids cared to dance like that anymore," he says. "All I've seen are a lot of awkward hip movements and some snapping."

"Dad, please?"

He looks at me like he was pleased and he nods his head. "Alright then," he says with a grin as he digs through his box of records again and he pulls out a red one. "This one is called the clap and snap."

"The clap and snap?" I ask flatly and he smirks as he moves the table to the side of the shed.

"Well, it has a proper name, but I could never pronounce it... so I just call it the clap," he says as he claps his hands together. "And snap," he says, adding a snap. I roll my eyes with a smile on my face. I love my dad. He's just ridiculous sometimes. "This is a popular one at big hall dances."

That sounds like something I need.

"Okay, now, this is a very proper dance," he says as he positions me at the center of the shed. "So, you stand across from your dance partner," he says motioning to himself as he stands a few feet across from me. "And I bow," he says as he puts his arm across his waist and bends forward slightly. "And you curtsy."

I snort in laughter as I do it because I'm just wearing shorts and an old shirt that do not feel like curtsy worthy attire.

"Good, now listen to the music," he says as he stands up straight like a proper gentlemen. "Traditionally, people will be lined up on both sides. Girls on your side and, obviously, men on my side," he says and I nod my head in understanding. "When the music crescendos like it now," he says as he steps forward and puts out his hand. "Every other person in the line trades places with their partner."

I step forward, and he puts his hand in mine, spinning us in a circle before we switch places.

"Always with that little move. You just have to sway to the music," he says. "Listen to the piano."

This seems harder than I imagined... We do it a few more times until I get it down and then he smiles.

"Good. Now you clap," he says and I make a face before doing as he says. "Then you'd trade places with the person beside you and then you snap..."

It took me an hour to learn the dance... and two to master it. I figured it must be a fun thing to do with a big group and I was hoping that they would play it during the ball so I could show off my skills. I had a good time hanging out with my Dad as well. I didn't realize I needed the bonding time with him until it was over and I felt relived to have spent time with him. He taught me one more dance before we went back inside and my mother had lunch waiting for us.

"How was cleaning the shed?" she asks. My father looks at me like he was waiting for my answer as well, and I smile at my mom.

"It was fun," I admit as I take my seat and she gives Dad a curious look before smiling back at me.

"Well, that is just wonderful then. I hope you two are hungry!"

"Oh, I definitely am," I admit as I start eating the meal she places before me. She always cooks such wonderful meals and I glance at her as she takes a seat by my father. "Thank you, Mom," I say and she blinks a few times before smiling at me again.

"Of course, dear," she says softly and I go back to finishing off my plate.

My Hogwarts letter came two days ago, so after lunch Mom took me to Diagon alley to get my things. I decided to use my money to buy a new uniform and I could see my mother frowning as I paid for most of my things myself. I don't like having second hand things if I can help it and I think I may have made my mother feel bad when I said it out loud. Other than that, it was a pleasant day, and when I got into my room that night, I started packing all of my school things in my trunk.

I can't wait for school to start.

I take a shower and go to bed, falling asleep easily and slipping into a rather peaceful dream about clouds and unicorns...Until I wake to pounding on my window. I jump up in panic and glance at the clock. It's three AM and I fumble around with the light before going over to the window and letting Draco in.

"Jesus," I whisper harshly as he crawls through my window. "Draco, it's so late," I say honestly as I cross my arms. "Why are you here right now?"

"I'm okay, if you were wondering," he snaps harshly and when I remember the state in which he left me, I let my arms drop.

"I'm sorry," I admit as I help him out of his cloak. "Did you see a healer?"

He nods his head. "I knew the curse he used," he says as he lifts his wand towards the door to lock it. "It was weak anyways. One potion fixed it," he says and then he turns to me.

He looks tired. There are circles under his eyes and his hair is disheveled. He's wearing that black outfit again and I nearly question him, but I stop myself. It didn't seem like the right time. He goes over to my vanity and he pulls his shirt over his head. I watch his back for a few moments before walking over to him and wrapping my arms around his from behind, pulling him close.

"Are you alright?" I ask softly against his neck. "You seem a little off."

He grips my hands in his and he brings them up to his lips, kissing my knuckles softly.

"I'm just tired. I'm sorry I frightened you. It wasn't my intention."

"It's alright," I say honestly as I kiss his shoulder blade. I'm just happy that I can do that anytime I want.

"I'm tired," he admits. "I just want to sleep."

He takes off his pants and then we climb into my small bed. "Do your parents ever notice that you're gone at night?" I ask as we get comfortable and he shakes his head before turning off my light.

"As long as I'm where I'm supposed to be in the morning, they could care less what I do."

I frown and hold him close.

"That's weird. My parents are always all over me."

"I'm sure your parents wouldn't appreciate me sleeping over so often," he admits and I smile a little.

"I bet not," I say softly and he runs his fingers up my arm.

"I like being around you," he admits in a soft voice and I lift my head to see his face. "I can relax. I don't have to worry about what you're planning."

"What?" I ask softly so he'll elaborate further, but he doesn't.

He doesn't say anything to that... and I don't press the conversation. After an hour of laying there in the darkness, I finally let myself go back to sleep. The happy dreams of unicorns and sunshine doesn't come back to me. Instead I have an all together darker landscape before me.

I'm back in the chamber of secrets, sitting in a puddle of black ink as Tom walks around me. Tom was looking like his handsome young self and he had a devilish smile on his face as he looked me over. I felt like I was a child again as his onyx eyes stared deeply into mine. He stopped walking and smiled at me. All of a sudden I was back in his trap once more, helpless and young and stupid.

"Ginny, Ginny, Ginny," his smooth voice chastises me with each click of his tongue. "Why must your always disappoint me?"

"I'm sorry," is all I say as he starts walking about me again. He's wearing an old Slytherin uniform and his polished shoes tap against the concrete floor.

I try to get up, but I slip in the ink and Tom laughs.

"You can't get away from me," he says like I was being foolish for even trying to get up. "You know that. I own you."

"You don't," I say in a small voice .

He looks me down and raises a dark eyebrow. "I do," he says and I shake my head. "Dark magic always lingers, Ginny, and I've put enough in you to last a lifetime. I. Own, You."

"You don't."

"I do."

"You don't!"

"I do."

"You don't!" I scream and then I wake with start. I catch my breath and lean against my pillow as I close my eyes.

"I do."

I snap my eyes open and turn to Draco. "What did you just say?" I hiss at him as he rubs his eyes out with the heel of his palm.

"I asked if you were okay?" he says in a voice thick with sleep and I furrow my brows for a few moments before letting myself get pulled against his chest again.

"You don't," I whisper before closing my eyes.

* * *

I have work the next day and once Draco leaves I get dressed quickly and let my Mom apparate me with Folk Hills. I make my way to that stupid club house five and I unlock the door. No one is waiting for me this time, and I go inside the creepy building with tentative steps. What am I supposed to do here now? I put my bag on the floor and glance around me before sitting down and crossing my legs.

This is so odd.

I was paid on Friday and I actually made more money from the two days when my job was transferred here than with the cloak closet gig I had. It doesn't seem right somehow... it still doesn't seem fair.

But I'm not going to question it.

I pull out my notebook after a while and open it up. I had to start using my old one again since the new one was water damaged, but I suppose I don't mind so much. It's like having an old friend around again. I pull out my pen and start editing a story I had written last month while I wait for something to happen. After a few hours pass by, I start to feel strange just sitting here. I stand up and grab my bag before walking outside, looking around me with a frown on my face.

This can't be all I have to do today.

I stand outside for a few moments with my back against the building and my arms crossed before I see Daphne running towards me.

"I am so sorry I'm late!" she says as she pulls her hair back into a bun. She's wearing a hot pink baby doll dress that is one inch away from being a nightie and silver, dangerously high, high-heels. She's running pretty well in them, though. "I totally forgot I was scheduled to hang out with you today."

"Scheduled to hang out with me?" I ask worriedly as I hike up my bag and she nods her head as she tries to catch her breath.

"I had a dress fitting in the morning and I just forgot. Please don't tell Draco," she says and I frown.

"I won't..." I trail off carefully and she gives me a bubbly smile once she gets her bearings.

"Good, so... what should we do today?" she asks as she looks around with her hands on her hips. "We could go to the pool."

"Wait... when you said scheduled... did you mean you were really scheduled to hang out with me?" I ask seriously and she blinks a few times before looking away. "Does Draco make you guys do that?" I ask with concern and she shakes her head.

"Of course not," she says and I put my hand on my hips.

"But you just said..."

"I didn't say anything," she says as she takes my arm and pulls me back into club house five. "Let's go to my place. You haven't been there yet and my mother would sorely love to meet you."

"Wait, no, I want to know what you meant," I hiss as I pull my arm away from her grasp. "I thought we were friends," I admit fiercely. "I didn't know I was a job."

"Of course you aren't, Gin," she says as she bats her eyelashes at me. "Don't be silly now. You know I just talk so much I forget what I say half the time."

"How is okay that I get paid for hanging out with you people all day?" I question and she shrugs.

"You know the Malfoy's own most of this place. Draco thought he was doing you a favor," she explains softly and I cross my arms. "It was a sweet gesture."

"But he makes you hang out with me?" I snap hatefully because it makes me feel like some kind of unwanted child.

"Of course he doesn't make us," she says with an eye roll but I can tell she's getting flustered because her cheeks are heating up. "Don't tell him I said that he made us."

I give her a disgusted look and turn away. I feel very upset right now and I'm trying to file all my thoughts into their appropriate places.

"Ginny, don't be upset," she says softly as she touches my shoulder. I shrug her off. "I don't think you understand how things work," she says gently like she was talking to a child.

"Look," she says and she looks around like she was reaching for words. "I know how this may seem a bit odd, but Draco just wanted you to enjoy the rest of your summer. He knew that you would want to hang out with your friends," she says as she motions to herself. "I just say things in stupid ways sometimes. Anyone can tell you that. I'm sorry that I made you mad."

"It's alright," I say through clenched teeth and she pats my arm.

"You're just going to have to get used to dating a man with influence," she says with a good willed smile. I don't smile back.

We end up going to her house, and I have the very uncomfortable feeling that I'm being babysat as I'm introduced to Daphne's mother, who is a colorful housewife with beautiful blond hair just like her daughter.

"It's such a pleasure to finally meet you, Ginny," she says as she takes my hand. She's wearing a pink track suit with shimmering jewels lining the seams. "Daphne and the girls have told me so much about you."

"It's nice to meet you too," I say politely as she smiles at me. She looks really young for someone who has a teenage daughter. "You have a beautiful home," I admit as I look around me. It's all light and open and airy with Corinthian columns holding it up.

"Thank you," she says as she picks up a rather large and fluffy cat that walks past. It looks grumpy as she pats its head and I almost laugh at it. "Can I get you girls anything to snack on or drink?" she asks as Daphne scratches the cats head as well.

"No thanks, Mom," Daphne says with a head shake. "We're just going to hang out in my room for a little bit."

She waves us off and I follow Daphne up the metal staircase towards the second floor. Before we get to her room, though, a small girl with golden curls comes barreling towards us.

"Daph!" the child screams in greeting as she runs and when she reaches Daphne, she hops up in her arms. "You're home."

"I sure am," she says as she kisses the girls cheek and my sour mood seems to melt at the display of affection. "Carmen, this is my friend Ginny," she says to the little girl who can't be more than four years old. "Say hello to Ginny."

"Hello Ginny," the little girl blinks at me and I smile at her.

"Alright, now go find Mom," she says as she sets the little girl down and pats her back. "I think she has snacks down stairs."

"Bye!" the girl runs off like a bolt of lightening and I watch her little legs take her down the stairs before turning back to Daphne.

"My little sister," she says with an eye roll. "They're always a pain, but what can you do?" she says with a shoulder shrug.

We pass by a few doorways that all have girl's names written on them. I know that Daphne has a little sister that's around my age, Astoria, but that's it.

"How many siblings do you have?" I question as we walk down the hallway.

"Four," she says like it was a subject that bored her. "They're all younger than me," she says with a shrug when we get to her room.

She has a large canopy princess bed with pale pink walls and a flowered bedspread. I sigh when I see it and I close the door tightly behind me as I look around at the posters of good looking guys from famous bands.

Most of the afternoon was spent with her doing my nails and hair and I kind of felt like a doll that she enjoyed dressing up. I didn't fight it too much, I guess. It's better than working at the check out counter. After a while, I started thinking about Draco and I bite my lip as I watch Daphne paint my toes a ruby red color.

"How old were you when you lost your virginity?" I ask curiously with my chin on my knees. She flicks her blue eyes to mine before smiling.

"Fifteen," she says as she blows on my nails.

Fifteen. I think of myself when I was fifteen.. I could never be sexually active then. "Did you like it?" I question softly.

She laughs. "Of course I liked it," she says as she starts on my other foot and I frown. "I was well prepared, though," she says.

"What does that mean?"

"I mean, you can't just off and have sex. There has to be some foreplay before hand."

"Oh," I whisper as I think about Draco and his amazing fingers and mouth. "Does it hurt the first time?" I ask softly and she shrugs as she starts painting the toes on my left foot, using light strokes with the brush.

"It didn't hurt for me," she says seriously. "But then I rode a lot of horses when I was girl so I didn't have anything to break through," she says like it wasn't a big deal and it takes me a moment to realize what she's saying before I finally get it. Oh. "Why?" she asks after I stay silent. "Are you thinking of sleeping with Draco?"

"Maybe," I admit honestly and she beams at me.

"Oh, you should. He would be so sweet to you."

"I just don't know if I'm ready," I say seriously as I furrow my brows. "I mean... I want to.. but I don't want to regret it later... you know?"

"Trust me, you would never regret having sex with Draco," she says and I make a face.

"Daphne, do you know who Draco has slept with?" I ask softly and she raises her eyebrows. I know I can get more information out of her than Pansy. "He told me he's only been with two girls, but he wouldn't give me names."

"If he wanted you to know," she says as she finishes with the nail polish. She sits back and screws the lid back on the bottle as I wiggle my toes. "He would have told you."

"Did he sleep with Pansy?" I ask uncomfortably. I know they dated for a while and that would make me feel weird.

She shakes her head. "Nope."

But she doesn't say anything more as she gets up to put away the polish on her desk.

"Did he sleep with you?" I ask even softer because she's acting funny and she snorts at the thought.

"Of course not," she says as she turns back to me. "Like I said, if he wanted you to know, he would tell you. He'll let you know in his own time... but let's not talk about that. Let's talk about you," she says as she runs over to me and hops on her bed with her chin in her hands. "When you finally give in, I think it will be quit magical for you," she says and I purse my lips.

"Why do you say that?" I ask and she shrugs as she lays back against her pillows.

"Just because," she says and then she starts humming to herself. "He's done so much for you, and he likes you more than I've seen him like anyone... it would be such a nice gift to give yourself to him," she says and that makes me feel weird.

"I'm not sure that's a good reason to sleep with someone," I admit and she laughs.

"I didn't mean it that way, of course. I know you like him too, but girls are different than boys and they can hold onto their urges more successfully. Half the time it's for stupid reasons like wanting to have a good reputation, but if you just give it to one guy, you don't have to worry about being called a whore or anything. It's the proper thing to do when in a relationship. If you want to do it, you should do it. Nothing should hold you back... especially not what other people will think."

I look down at my right hand and wiggle my fingers again as I think of that 'no cheating oath' that I took with him. "You told me Draco is intense," I say as I think of him beating up that mugger in the forest. She nods her head. "Do you think he would..." I trail off uneasily. "Nevermind." I say with a head shake, but she sits up.

"No, go ahead. What were you going to say?"

"If he got mad at me, he wouldn't like hurt me, would he?" I ask and she narrows her eyes.

"You should be ashamed for asking that question," she says and I feel my ears heating up in embarrassment. "Of course he wouldn't hurt you. He's a gentlemen."

"You're right," I whisper. It was stupid. I really like Draco and I shouldn't have even thought that. "I'm sorry."

She sighs loudly and then pats my leg. "Don't be sorry. Draco can get a little... scary sometimes." she admits and I give her a troubled look. "But you're his now and he wouldn't do anything to hurt you."

"Why do you say it like that?" I ask curiously. "I'm not 'his'." That just seems like such a terribly possessive way to put it and I don't like it.

She turns her head and blinks at me for a few moments.

"If you're not his, Ginny. Then whose are you?"

"Nobodies," I say with a scoff. "I belong to myself."

"Of course," she says flatly like she thought I was being silly about the whole matter and I turn away as she goes back to humming a song.

I wish that Hermione was home, or that Luna was talking to me again. I feel like I need a friend outside the Slytherin walls because sometimes I feel like I'm being tugged and manipulated into a certain corner. Draco's corner.

I do like him, though... I like him so much that now I can't see myself without him.

I just wish I had an objective view on things.

I look at Daphne as she twists a golden curl around her finger, thinking over the conversation we just had. I bet if I was dating Harry and thinking of sleeping with him, Hermione would have totally different advice for me. I know we're all from totally different worlds, but I just feel like I'm on the losing side in this and, even with Pansy and Daphne... whatever Draco says will go despite my feelings on the matter. What is the motive, though?

It's odd. I can't shake the feeling but a very strong willed part of me... that part who likes Draco, doesn't seem to care.

Before I leave, I pass by Daphne's little sister's room once more and laying on the floor is a children's story book. I pick it up as Daphne watches me curiously and I flip it open to one particular story.

_The Tale of the Serpent and the Queen_

"Can I borrow this?" I ask softly.

"Uh, why?" she asks as I close it and look at her.

"Because," is all I say.

"Sure, whatever," she says with a smile like I was foolish.

I put it on my bag before we leave and it weighs heavily against my side.

* * *

"This is such a beautiful color combination," Mrs. Malfoy says as she clasps the necklace around my neck. "I know they say that 'Red and Green should not be' but the color of these jewels aren't really a true green," she says as she puts in the earrings for me.

The jewelery is heavy against my skin, mostly because it looks so expensive and it's weighing on my conscious. The necklace is made up of clean cut diamonds with three large green stones set inside the cluster that form a V in the middle of my chest. The earrings are made from the same mold, with the large green stones surrounded by smaller diamonds.

"It's a pale green," she says as she moves to my other ear. "With a bit more yellow in it."

"It's beautiful," I admit in a small voice as I touch the necklace.

I feel mildly ill to be stuck in this room alone with Narcissa Malfoy, but she insisted I come early to get ready. I lied to my mother, no surprise there, and told her that I had to cover someone's shift at work. She dropped me off at Folk Hills with my dress placed in a bag that I told her was my new uniform... I turned around and left as soon as she popped away.

From there, I went to one of those salons Mrs. Malfoy had mentioned. The woman there, Jonette, was already there and ready for me. She did my hair to Narcissa's exact specifications and when it came time for me to pay for it... which I was prepared to do, I was told that it was already covered and that I was also scheduled to get my nails and makeup done as well as my eyebrows waxed.

I didn't know if I should be insulted by it or not, but I let myself relax and actually enjoy being pampered for a while. My mother isn't the girly girl type so this kind of stuff was never in our bonding schedule. It was kind of nice and I was almost sad to leave for the most part but I was definitely reluctant to go to Draco's family home. It took me a while to gather the courage to Apparate. I had to talk myself into it.

When I saw Malfoy Manor, I honestly almost fainted.

It's the biggest, grandest estate I had ever seen. From afar it looked like some posh hotel and it was at the top of a rather large and winding hill. It took up most of the sky line and it looked down at the rest of the estate like a menacing castle.

I still can't believe people live like this.

I nearly ran away because I knew I could never fit in or be comfortable in a place like that, but I held my ground. I decided to be brave. Before going inside, I stood there and counted the windows that I saw on the house.. or Manor, I guess. I counted eighty six. There were eighty six windows and that was just the front of the house. I still can't quite get over it, and as I made my way up the walk way, I passed by concrete statues and well manicured shrubbery... and white peacocks.

I'm not even kidding.

A house-elf met me at the door and led me to Narcissa who was in one of the beautifully furnished bedrooms up the grand stair case. I have yet to see Draco or his father and a part of me is grateful for that. I still think his father would send me into some kind of embarrassing fit and I'm dreading seeing him later tonight.

"Look at you," she says as she steps back and she smiles at me from the mirror. "You look like a true lady now."

In this dress with the jewels and the hair and the make up... I do look like someone else all together. Someone refined and classy... someone beautiful. I feel a little smile on my face as I touch the fabric of the dress again. I don't look so out of place in this wonderful room, actually, and that's surprising.

"Thank you, Mrs. Malfoy," I say as I turn to face her. She's wearing a beautiful yellow dress with red jewelry. She looks like some kind of dessert off an expensive menu. "You've been so kind to me," I say. I'm still nervous being around her. I don't want to do or say the wrong thing so I've been pretty shy since I got here.

"Of course," she says, giving me a pleasing smile. "Now, let's get you downstairs. People are arriving now and the other girls need my attention," she says as she takes my arm to lead me out of the room.

"The other girls?" I question.

"The girls that are being introduced tonight," she says as we make our way to the hallway. It's large, of course, with ornate wood work and paintings on the walls. "They're in the room down the hall," she says, nodding in that direction.

"Oh," is all I get out. That means Daphne and Pansy are down there. I wish I could have gotten ready with them instead of having all of this awkward one on one time with Mrs. Malfoy.

She walks me all the way to the top of the stair case and I try to remember it all because I am sure I'll get lost in this maze of a house at some point in time. I can hear voices and violin music coming from down stairs and I feel a nervous flutter in my stomach as I run a hand over my hair to make sure it's smooth.

"I will meet you later," Narcissa says when we reach the top of the stairs and then she kisses my cheek. I didn't expect it and I tensed my body up at the contact.

"Bye," I say weakly and I watch her walk away before turning towards the stair case. There are so many people here already. I dig through my clutch and take out a couple anti-anxiety pills.

I'm glad that I have them now, thank god, and I down them quickly.

People are showing up, and they're taking up the large entrance hall with their fancy clothes and mindless chatter. I try to find Draco, but I don't see him anywhere and I chew on my lip nervously as my eyes scan the crowd. I don't want to go down there and wonder around by myself with everyone watching.

"You clean up well," someone whispers in my ear and I jump in surprise. It's Draco, of course, and he puts his hand on the railing by my side as he laughs at my reaction.

"Laugh it up," I say with a head shake as I face the crowd at the bottom of the stairs again. "Sneaking up on people isn't polite," I scold and he laughs again as he takes a drink from the flute in his hand. It looks like champagne.

"How was my mother?" he asks as he studies my profile.

"She was very sweet to me," I admit softly and then I glance at him. He's wearing a well fitted black suit with a bow tie and he looks sinfully handsome in it. "I was a nervous wreck, though. I think I only said a hand full of words."

"That's all she needs," he says with a smirk as he eyes me up and down. "She's always wanted a doll to dress up... and dress you up she did," he says with a pleased smile as his eyes scan my body. "You look very beautiful."

I blush. "Thanks," I mutter as I shyly look away.

We stand in silence for a while and then he brings his hand up to run his knuckles up and down my arm as we look down at the guests below.

"Are any half blooded... or muggle born girls ever introduced?" I ask and he snorts so I shoot him a look.

"I believe you know the answer to that," he says as he takes another drink from his glass.

Fair enough.

"Why is your family so big on the pureblooded stuff anyways?" I ask with a frown. He keeps stroking my arm like I was a cat on his lap.

"Your family doesn't exactly practice what it preaches, now does it?" he asks and I make a face. "You're still a pure line even after all this time. So you can say your family loves muggles and half breeds, but none of you Weasley's marry them."

"That's not what I asked," I snap because he's right and I don't like thinking about it.

"The more muggles and half bloods you let into a family, the more squibs it produces," he says and I furrow my brows because I'm not totally sure if that's true. "It's a fact," he says like he was reading my mind. "And our magic wains around big groups of muggles. That's why we've kept separate from them for so long and why they shouldn't be allowed in our world. If someone doesn't care about the purity of our blood, then we will go extinct."

"Muggles have magical babies all the time," I point out. "I doubt that will ever stop happening."

"That might be true, but they aren't very powerful."

"Hermione is the smartest witch in your grade," I say with a frown and he gives me an unpleasant smirk.

"She's smart, but she's not powerful," he says seriously. "She can read all the books she wants, it will not make her a better witch."

I don't agree with him at all and I turn my head away. "It's all in the numbers, love. I'm not making any of this up." I don't say anything. It was a bitter topic to bring up and I regret it already. "Let's go downstairs," he says as he touches my ear, playing with the dangling earring. "It's getting a bit thick up here, don't you agree?"

"Yes," I say with a sigh. "I agree."

I let him lead me down the stairs. "I'm nervous," I admit out loud as I see more people that I recognize from the papers and magazines file into the room.

"Don't be," he says with a smile and then he squeezes my hip. "My father is going to be here tonight," he says and I nod my head. "But I asked him to keep his distance from you. Until you're ready to engage in conversation with him, he will stay away. From your reaction the last time you saw him, I want you to know that it would not be considered rude for you to not greet him like it normally would because he is the host." I look up at him worriedly and he smiles as he brushes a tendril of hair away from my face. "You're the lucky one that gets a free pass."

"Does your father hate me?" I ask. I know that he was the one who gave me the diary that had messed me up so terribly, but he was still Draco's father... and for some reason I didn't want them to not like me as messed up as that is.

"Of course not," he says as he takes another glass of champagne from one of the waiters dressed in white. "He completely understands the situation."

"Okay," I say with a head nod as he hands me the glass. I've never had champagne before and I was kind of nervous to try it, but I figured if I could drink firewhisky, I could handle this.

Draco starts working the room, talking to just about everyone and introducing me to the highest of the high society. It was intimidating at first, but I liked watching Draco converse with others. He adapted to each person, changing the way he approached conversations to fit the need of each personality.

With Mrs. Cole, a prominent wizengamot members wife, he spoke with enthusiasm about her small corgi dogs and then he turned right around and agreed with another mans hatred of small dogs and their owners. In one conversation he was a die hard Quidditch fan, in another he preferred to read books over sports. He went from being a right wing conservative to a left wing liberal all within fifteen minutes.

It was actually kind of concerning because he was so believable in everything he said.

"What?" he says after we have a moment alone because I've been staring at him for the good part of fifteen minutes.

"You..." I trail off and furrow my brows. "You lie particularly well," I say with a worrisome frown and he scoffs at me as he takes a drink from his glass.

"It's called networking, Ginny," he says like I was silly. "Building connections."

"By lying to people?" I question and he shakes his head.

"I hardly have a set opinion on half the things," he says. "To be successful, people have to like you, and for people to like you... they have to think you share their interests."

I narrow my eyes. "Do you lie to me?" I ask and he gives me a look before he grabs my chin, tilting it up to his face.

"You're my girl," he says with a smirk before kissing me. "I don't have to lie to you."

"Right," I say as I shake my head out of his grasp. "So, what else happens now?" I ask as I look around the room. It's packed now and most people are eating finger foods from the large buffet table that's located along the left side of the room.

"Well," he says as he checks his watch. "The girls will be introduced by their fathers soon," he says. "There are a few more steps this year since my mother turned this into a charity event," he says like the thought annoyed him. "So once they're down here, the dances will be auctioned off," he says with an eye roll.

"What charity?" I question and he shakes his head.

"Some kind of endangered sperm whale or something stupid like that." he says like he could care less.

"Your mother has been very nice to me," I say as I touch the jewels on my necklace. "Wearing this scares me," I say with a nervous laugh. "I think it costs more than my house and I know I could never repay her for this dress.."

"She wouldn't accept money from you," he says seriously. "It was a gift and I must say, it looks like you were made to wear expensive things," he tells me with a charming smile. "Money suits you."

I'm not sure what I think about that, so I don't say anything.

The music stops and then a man in a white suit jacket walks towards the stairs, placing his wand to his throat.

"Ladies and Gentlemen," he says and his voice booms across the hall. Draco runs his fingers along the curve of my waist and hip and I smile at him before turning back to the man. "First of all, we would all like to thank the Malfoy family for allowing us to use their beautiful home for the annual Debutant Ball."

People clap and few eyes turn towards Draco and... his father, who I see on the other side of the room.

"And I would also like to ask that you be more than generous with your donations to the Save the Whales foundation..." he starts talking about the foundation and I lean my head against Draco's shoulder because it's boring. When he's finished talking about the whales, he finally gets back on track. "Now, this year we have eleven lovey ladies that will walk down these stairs and officially be young women, ready for a full adult life..."

He goes into another long winded speech about society and the girls who will be presented. I try to shift my weight from foot to foot because the heels I'm wearing are killing my feet. I hate wearing heels, it puts way too much pressure on the ball of my feet. I don't understand how women wear them all the time and I nearly slip them off, but the music starts back up and the girls start coming down the stairs on the arms of their fathers.

The same man in the white suit announces their names as they come down, listing off their accomplishments and their family history as the people clap. Cho is the first girl presented and her father is a handsome Asian man in a gray suit. She's wearing a beautiful white dress and she has feathers in her hair. In fact, all the girls have some sort of feather headdresses on. She does some kind of light sparkly thing with her wand that makes everyone clap and whistle like she was part of the show.

Pansy and her serious father come next. I had no idea that Pansy was a world class dueler in some kind of society and I clap softly as she does her wand work. Millicent is escorted by her uncle and when I ask why, Draco says that her father died a few years ago in some kind of magical accident. That made me feel a little bit bad, but I ignored it when she found me in the crowd and glared.

Daphne is all smiles and bubbly waves when it's her turn. She looks like a barbie doll and when she gets to the platform on the stairs, she stops and puts her hands on her hips, giving her best pageant smile that makes me laugh and shake my head. Her father's appearance is actually quit surprising to me. He's a shorter man and rather large. His shape is more like a ball than a normal man and his cheeks are red like Santa Clause. She sees me and winks as the announcer goes through her beauty pageant history and her pureblooded family tree. She lifts her wand, doing another light sparkly thing in the shape of a star. I guess it is part of the show...

"I heard you were dating a Weasley," an old man says and Draco and I both turn towards the voice as the other girls are introduced. I'm quite surprised to find a man sitting in a wheel chair, staring up at both of us like he owned the place. "Is that blood feud over then?" he asks curiously as he glances at me with a smile.

He's old, very old it seems, and he has short white hair, slicked back away from his face. I run my eyes over his attire because he's wearing a finely cut set of bottle green dress robes. No one wears dress robes anymore unless it's required in their job so I know he must be old fashioned... I look over his wheel chair... I've never seen a magical person in one. It puts him up quite high, his head reaching my chin, and it has a black leather seat and arm rests. He also has a roman nose that hooks down just the slightest bit, but overall he's attractive for an older man. When he glances at me I notice the eyes...silver, like Draco's.

"Grandfather," Draco greets with a smile as he shakes his hand formally. I feel my insides do a somersault and my eyes automatically snap down to the floor. "It's good to see you," he says and his Grandfather nods his head.

"Always a pleasure," he says with a regal voice and I keep my face looking down until I feel a finger on my chin, tilting it up. "Let me have a look then," he says as he sits forward in his chair and forces me to look at him. I finally find the courage to make eye contact. "Well, she is quite lovely, Draco," he says and I blush as he drops his fingers and sits back.

"I've always favored redheads," he says, giving me a charming smile. I can see Draco in him and I have to wonder what he really thinks of me. "I find them very adorable and it was always unfortunate that it seemed to be the dominate trait in your family. It was always so hard to hate so many redheaded children. There was always something so charming about them," he says with a laugh.

"Thanks?" I say softly. He props his elbow up on the arm rest and taps his fingers against his lips as he looks me over.

"But," he says as he glances at Draco. "Perhaps this union would put an end to all of that nonsense?"

"Perhaps," Draco says as I try not to choke on the word 'union'.

I look at Draco again as he finishes off the champagne and he hands it to a passing waiter. I look at his fingers... perhaps a union isn't actually such a bad thing. His fingers can do amazing things to my body and I bite my lip just thinking about it. He feels me staring awkwardly and he shoots me a quick and curious glance. I shake the thought of Draco's fingers and the amazing things they make me feel away as I focus back on his grandfather. I shouldn't be thinking about lusty foreplay right now.

"Well, Miss Ginevra Weasley," he says with a smirk as he takes me in again. He knows my name, I don't remember telling it to him. I'm amusing he knows all about me from his grandson. He shares a look with Draco and then he glances at me again as I try to figure out his wheelchair. "You keep looking at my chair," he says as he pats one of the wheels like he read my mind.

"I'm sorry," I say seriously. In the back ground I can hear the dance auction for the whales happening, but I try to ignore it. "I've just never..."

"Seen a wizard in one?" he finishes for me and I nod my head. "Some curses are not reversible, I'm afraid," he says as he looks at Draco. "But it makes for an interesting time when going downhill."

Draco smirks and I find a small smile on my face as well. That was kind of funny... perhaps he's not so bad.

"I have seen a lot of Weasley's in my life time," he says as he taps his fingers against the leather padded arm rest. People start moving into the room off the main hall, but we don't."And I must say that you are the most refined one I have ever seen."

I blush again and feel all kinds of uncomfortable.

"It appears that we're moving into the ball room," he says and then he smiles at me. "It was a pleasure meeting you, my dear. Now I will take my leave."

He snaps his fingers and in a moment a woman in a plum dress is behind him, wheeling him away. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding and I look at Draco.

"He liked you," he says and I bring my hand up to my neck to nervously play with the necklace.

"I barely said anything," I point out and he starts steering me with the crowd into the other room.

"You didn't have to," he says as he takes my hand and intertwines our fingers. "Remind me to teach you occlumency when the school year starts."

I let that sink in before I realize what he meant. "Wait, you mean he was..." I trail off with my cheeks turning red as I try to remember all I just thought about.

I remember looking at Draco's fingers and thinking... oh god.

"Are you kidding?" I ask with a whine and he shakes his head. "Oh god," I say as I start panicking and I bring my fingers up to my mouth so I can nervously chew on my nails. Hopefully he wasn't looking in on my brain when I was thinking about his grandson fingering me. "It's so rude to read peoples minds," I say in a shaky voice once we reach the ball room.

I just want to go home right now, actually.

"It's rude," he confirms as he finds another full glass of champagne. "It doesn't stop people from doing it and most people in this room have been doing it for such a long time that you wouldn't even know it. You have to be prepared and you need to realize when someone is digging in your mind," he says and then he glances at me. He gently brings his hand up and removes my hand away from my mouth. "I'm sure he's heard worse than what bops around in your head," he says seriously because I think he realizes how shaken I am right now.

"Do you know Legilimency?" I ask carefully.

"I do," he says with a head nod.

"Have you ever..." I trail off and bite my lip. "Have you ever read my mind?" I ask and he raises an eyebrow.

"No," he says seriously and I believe him so I nod my head. "Don't worry so much. Nothing in your mind can be that bad. You are far too sweet."

I down my glass of champagne and pass it off on one of waiters as I try to calm my nerves. I'm glad I had my pills because I would probably be a nervous wreck right about now. I try to block my mind, then, suspicious that everyone who looks at me is trying to read it, but I end up wearing myself out and I try to think pleasant thoughts instead. Draco was right, there's nothing in my mind worth reading, really.

Draco starts networking again, and I let myself get comfortable once he introduces me to one of the editors of the Daily Prophet. We talk about books and articles for a while until I feel totally at ease and when he walks away, I feel much happier.

The first dance was between the introduced girls and their fathers and the second was one of the auctioned off dances. I watched from the side lines as Draco's father took Pansy's hand and whirled her around the room like they were old friends. He didn't look half as frightening when he was trotting around the room in an old fashioned dance.

The third song was a dance that everyone could do and when the song started playing, my eyes brightened. I know this one! This is one that my father taught me in the shed and I look at Draco.

"What?" he asks as his hand moves up my back.

"Can we dance?"

"If you want to," he says carefully like he thought I was up to something and I pull him towards the center of the room as the boys line up on one side and the girls line up on the other. I stand by Pansy and she smiles at me.

"Your introduction was lovely," I say softly because I hadn't had a chance to talk to her yet. She smiles and crinkles her nose.

"Yes, it was, wasn't it?" she says as Blaise stands across from her with his hand in his pocket. "You look beautiful tonight," she says as she reaches over and touches my earrings. "Narcissa really went all out on you."

"Yeah," I say uncomfortably as I bring my hand up to my hair. "She sure did..."

The dance starts up and I look at Draco as he bows down a little bit from his waist, staring at me the whole time with a dark smirk on his face. I smile at him and do the curtsy, feeling much more comfortable because this time I'm actually wearing a fancy dress.

"You and Draco look like a very dignified couple," Pansy says before she steps forward and reaches her hand out, doing the spin with Blaise.

He takes her spot. I ignore him and step forward to the do the same with Draco. When I take his hand, he grips it firmly and winks at me before we spin. When I get back to Pansy she turns to me.

"I didn't know you could dance," she says as we clap. The clap and snap. My Dad was right on that front. "These steps are very old."

"My father taught me," I admit as we switch places. We snap. Then I look at Blaise because I know I'm going to have to touch his hand next.

Ugh.

When it's my turn to step forward, Blaise turns up the corner of his lips in a barely there smile as he grabs my hand. "I always appreciate the look of pure disgust every time you're around me," he says, but I don't have time to retort because I end up by Draco.

"Everyone is curious about you," Draco says says as he takes me by the waist and turns us until we're in a circle with another couple. I try to remember the steps on this part because this one is difficult. "They're all very envious of me right about now," he whispers in my ear before the dance pulls him away.

I take the hand of an older gentlemen who smiles at me before I get passed off back to Draco. "Why is that?" I ask before we're split up again.

"Because," he says as he pass each other. "You are the prettiest girl in the room," he says and I smile when we pass each other again. "And you're _mine_."

"Lucky you," I tell him with a smirk and he wiggles his brows at me.

It makes me laugh.

We go through the rest of the dance in silence, just listening to the music and doing the steps my father had taught me. I feel a pleased smile on my face the whole time and my cheeks heat up from all the movements. When it's finally over, we curtsy and bow again and then every one claps as I take in a deep breath. Draco comes back to me and kisses the top of my head which makes me feel special, so I put my arm around his waist and lean my head against his chest.

"That was fun," I say breathlessly and Draco smirks at me.

"Would you like something to drink?" he asks and I nod my head.

"Stay. I'll be right back," he says and I watch him walk off with a smile on my face as Pansy and Daphne approach in their lovely white dresses with feathers in their hair.

"Oh, Ginny, thank you so much for coming," Daphne runs towards me and gives me a hug. "Did you like our introductions?"

"Yes, of course," I say with a smile.

"You know what this means, right?" she says with a smile and then she gives Pansy an excited look. "We can be properly courted now. We can get married."

"You want to get married?" I ask skeptically and she nods her head.

"Oh, of course. What else?"

"Daphne doesn't have the highest expectations for life," Pansy says with an eye roll as she crosses her arms. "Draco hasn't been able to keep his eyes off you all night," she points out. We all look towards Draco. He's speaking to some older gentleman with a serious turn on his face. When he notices us staring, he glance our way and I turn quickly. "I believe you have successfully won him over," she says and I furrow my brows.

"I didn't know there was a competition for his affections," I add sourly and she shakes her head with a good natured smile.

"Just pointing something out, of course."

I see Ivy approach us and I stiffen. She's wearing a silver number with dangling chandelier earrings that weigh down her earlobes.

"Pansy, it was lovely," she says as she kisses her older sister's cheek. She does the same to Daphne and then she turns to me. "Ginny," she says and I stiffen again when she puts her hands on my shoulders and kisses my cheek.

What?

"It's so good to see you," she says with a tight lipped smile as I step away from her embrace.

"Yeah," I say carefully. The last time I saw her I did call her a slut, after all. It's smart to be cautious.

"Could I speak with you for a moment?" she asks carefully as she glances at the two girls by my side.

"Sure," I say slowly and Daphne and Pansy leave us as Ivy takes a step closer to me.

"I would just like to say that I'm sorry for the small misunderstanding we got into at Zabini's house," she says and I feel an amused little smile on my face. "It was all in good fun, you understand. I'm hoping that we'll become the best of friends."

Right.

"What did Draco say to you?" I ask curiously as I raise an eyebrow. I figure he must have risen to my bait and scolded her for treating me so badly. I'm anxious to know what was said.

"He didn't say anything to me, of course," she says with a fake grin and I smirk unpleasantly.

"Of course he didn't," I say in a way that tells her that I don't believe it. "I'm looking forward to getting to know you better," I lie through my teeth and she smiles once more before walking away. I see her shaking her head and slouching her shoulders as she walks and I smirk to myself as Draco approaches me.

"You look like you're in a good mood," he says as he hands me another glass of champagne.

"I am," I tell him seriously as another dance starts up. This one I don't know and I feel like I'm sweating from the first dance. "Where is the restroom?" I ask as I glance at him.

He gives me directions and I hand him my glass to hold. "I'll be right back," I tell him seriously as I start heading that way.

I see Mr. Malfoy standing by the door with his wife and I know I'm going to have to pass him to get to where I want to go. I pause for a moment to gather my courage to walk past them and I tilt my head up.

"Ginny, are you having a good time?" Mrs. Malfoy asks and I blush as I'm forced to stop and talk for the sake of politeness.

"Yes, I am," I admit and then I let my gaze slide over to Mr. Malfoy as he eyes me critically. He doesn't say anything and I blush when I recall the last time I saw him. I had fainted like a fool.

He's just a person. He's just Draco's father and he hasn't done anything to make me uncomfortable tonight.

I gather up my courage and look him in the eyes. "How are you this evening, Mr. Malfoy?" I ask with a head nod.

He smiles a bit, like it was a challenge I rose to. "Very well this evening, Miss Weasley," he says and I look over my shoulder once to see Draco staring at me like I was a Christmas present.

"That's good," I say awkwardly and then I feel like running... so I try to be nice about it. "If you'll excuse me," I say politely and they nod me off as I speed walk out of the room.

The hallway is dark, and I find someone sitting alone on one of the chairs. As I get closer, following the directions that Draco had given me, I realize it's Millicent. She has a plate with a piece of cake on top of it sitting on her lap and she's staring at it with so much intensity that I fear it may catch fire. I almost walk past her, but I stop myself because she looks so alone. I think about what Draco said about her father dying a few years ago, and my sympathy gets the better of me.

"Are you okay?" I ask when I stand in front of her.

She was introduced tonight as well, and her dress is a white puffy ball gown that makes her look like a cupcake.

She glances up at me with a glare and then looks back at the cake. "I haven't had cake in a year," she says flatly as she picks up her fork and pokes it.

"Cake is good," I say softly. The feathers in her hair make it look like two wings are sprouting on the sides of her head and she's wearing a set of sparkling pearls that catch the candle light just right.

"Cake is good," she whispers and then she looks up at me again. It's like she realized she hated me and she narrows her eyes. "Draco is like cake," she says and I raise my eyebrows.

"What?" I ask dryly and she continues with a fire burning in her eyes.

"He looks good, tastes good, but when it comes down to it... he's really terrible for you." she says and I roll my eyes at the analogy.

"Draco will rot my teeth and make me fat?" I question sarcastically and she sneers.

"He will twist you and turn you into something so far from what you originally were that you won't even be able to recognize yourself in the mirror."

I'm silent for a few moments before I bite the corner of my lip. "Is that what happened to you?" I ask cautiously. She did have all that work done and her body has been pulled in so many ways that I doubt anyone will know who she is when the school year starts back up.

She looks down at the cake again and then I see her shoulders rise in a deep breath. I step back when she stands up and I watch with a confused tilt of my head as she walks back towards the ballroom. She throws the cake at the opposite wall before plastering a fake smile on her face and entering the crowded room again as the cake and frosting slides down the expensive wall paper.

That was odd.

She has issues.

I shake off that odd conversation as I continue on my quest for the loo. I can tell someone about the cake on the wall when I get back. The bathroom is bigger than my bed room and I sigh as I stare at the furnishings and the golden plated sink. I have to wonder what Draco thinks when he's at my house. He's never said anything about it, of course, but he has to think something. My room is still painted yellow from when I was a girl and the furniture is painted light blue, but it's cracking and fading with age. It's shabby, but not in the shabby chic kind of way... if his bathroom looks this amazing... _God._

I wash my hands and straighten out my hair as I stare at my reflection. I bring a towel up to my forehead to dab off the sweat and I step back when I'm finished. I really do look like someone out of a magazine tonight with these jewels and I finger them again before leaving the restroom and closing the door behind me.

I take my time going back to the ball room. There are a few paintings hanging on the walls and I stop to look at them. One is of a blond haired man in knights armor, holding a bloody sword with body parts scattered behind him. I make a face at the gore and blink a few times as I remember that story Draco had told me about our families history.

"Did you enjoy the dance?" I turn around in surprise to find Draco standing right there.

"I told you I was just going to the restroom. I would be right back."

"You look so good tonight," he whispers as he walks towards me. I start backing up because he's looking at me so fiercely right now. "You have been perfect."

"Did you expect me to fall on my face or something?" I ask. I hit the wall, and then he's right in front of me.

"No," he says with a head shake as he places his hands on either side of my head. "I just didn't know I would be so impressed with you," he says with his eyes shining. He bites his lip and I raise my eyebrows as he bends down to kiss me.

I laugh at it, actually.

"What are you doing?" I ask as I put my hands on his chest to push him back. "Your whole family is here."

"It doesn't matter," he says seriously as he kisses my jaw. "You've pleased me tonight," he says as he brings a hand down to my one of my breasts and he squeezes.

"Oh my," I say as I inhale deeply as I put my hand over his. "Don't I please you every night?" I ask to distract him because I know I'm going to give in if he keeps on touching me like he is.

I'm turning into quite the pushover with him.

"Yes," he says breathlessly as he pushes his body into mine. He is being awfully needy right now. "But especially tonight. Come with me," he says as he takes my hand and starts pulling me down the dark corridor. "I need a place where I can take off your clothes."

"Wait..." I say as I tug on his hand. "Millicent threw cake on your wall," I tell him as I point behind me because I know I should tell someone.

"I don't fucking care," he sneers and I snap my mouth shut.

"You've been so proper tonight," I say with a smirk as I follow him. "I wasn't expecting this to happen."

"I'm not always so proper," he says. "I think that is something that you will find out in definite detail the longer that you're with me."

I smirk and grab his shoulder, spinning him around and pushing him against the wall as I press a harsh kiss against his lips. I hear him gasp in surprise and the sound is so unbelievably pleasing to me. I caught him off guard. Me. I actually caught him off guard and it felt good.

"Who wants to be proper anyways," I whisper against his lips and he laughs as he spins us around until

I'm the one pinned to the wall again.

"Don't tempt me," he whispers darkly.

Then we hear a loud bang that rattles the windows and a bright red and blue light illuminates the hallway.

"Fireworks," I say in awe as I push him away so I can go over to the window. Another loud bang sounds and I watch as the firework goes off against the backdrop of the dark sky. It's green and it fizzles out golden. "They're wonderful," I whisper as I watch them and Draco steps up behind me with his hands on my hips.

They start turning into animals that move across the sky and I lean back against Draco's chest as he wraps his arms further around me. After a while, I bring my hand up to the back of his neck and I run my fingers through his hair as we watch the show. This is turning into the most mature relationship I've ever been in and I like that I don't feel nervous about my boundaries with him. I can hear people awing and clapping from the ball room after each display that's grander than the next. I know that everyone in there is watching them as well.

I tilt my head to the right so I can glance at Draco over my shoulder. He smiles at me and kisses my cheek. Then he bites my neck.

"Draco!" I hiss as I push his face away and rub my neck. "You're going to leave a mark."

"How terrible," he says sarcastically. "I have something for you," he says as I pull back so I can face him fully. A purple firework goes off and it illuminates his face in an eerie glow. "I was going to wait until later..." he trails off as he pulls something from his pocket and I furrow my brows as he hands me a small rectangular box. "But why wait?"

"What is it?" I whisper as I take it from him. I don't know why I'm whispering, actually. I don't know why I'm nervous.

"You don't know what your family crest is," he says as I start to open the box. Whatever it is is covered in a black velvet cloth. I can feel something turning the pit of my stomach and I identify it as anticipation. "And I'm assuming you don't know your house colors," he adds.

"Scarlet and gold," I say automatically but he shakes his head.

"Not your Hogwarts house colors," he says like I was stupid. "Your family house colors."

"Oh," I say and when I remove the cloth, it reveals a silver bracelet. My heart starts hammering. "Then no, I don't know my house colors."

"I thought so." He gives me a gentle smile that puts my nerves at ease. "I figured you could just wear mine then," he says. "I know it doesn't go with the outfit tonight," he says as he takes it out. I put out my wrist so he can put it on. It has two intricately carved dragons set into the tarnished silver and the closer I look at it, the more details I see. The dragons almost look real and they have small emeralds as eyes.

It's actually very beautiful.

When it's on, I bring it up to my face so I can get a closer look. There are words inscribed around the dragons.

_Sanctimonia Vincet Semper_

"What does this say?" I ask curiously as I run my fingers over the dragons. It looks like an antique piece of jewelry, something that has been in a family for generations. You don't see this kind of craftsmanship on such a small scale anymore.

"My families motto," he says as he watches my face.

I look up at him and smile. "Thank you," I say softly. It's beautiful and the nicest thing anyone has ever given me. "I love it."

He smirks and I've never seen someone so attractive before. I think of what Millicent said about him and I bat that thought away. I've always fancied cake, anyways. I don't care if it's bad for me. The good far outweighs the bad.

He bends down to kiss me with the fireworks exploding in the distance lighting us in different colored lights. Perfect. My heart pounds pleasantly against my rib cage and when we pull back, he brings his hand up to my cheek, smoothing a tendril of hair away from my face.

It's official.

I'm fairly certain that I'm falling in love with him.


	8. Chapter 8

Draco holds out the snitch and smirks at me as I turn the broom so we're facing each other again. He's caught it the past two times and I am determined not to let him win again.

"You know, if you used one of my brooms you may have a chance," he says smugly as he sits back on his brand new black nimbus 2012. He puts one hand on his slender hip as he sends me a mocking smile. "You'll never beat me on a clean-sweep, sweetheart."

I roll my eyes and fix my riding gloves before gripping the broom. We're high up in the air right now, above an open field on the Malfoy estate.

"I don't need a fancy broom to beat you," I scoff as I put my goggles down. He smirks darkly before doing the same and leaning forward.

"On three then," he says with a smile. "One, two..."

"Three," I finish for him as he releases the golden ball from his firm grasp. It zooms into the air and we take off after it.

The past two times, Draco has been tailing me on his broom and then diving off in a different direction. It distracts me and by the time I find him again, he's already holding the damn snitch. He's faster than I am and he's a graceful flier; his movements are sharp and precise. I think I could learn a thing or two from him if I wasn't too prideful. I'm a good flier, I know that. I'm just self taught and there are some moves that Draco can do that just baffle me into amazement. I wonder if he'll teach me if I ask...

"It's amazing to see you fly so fearlessly," he says as I resist the urge to elbow him in the side because he is flying way too close to me. "When you nearly have a heart attack in a harmless little boat."

"Worry about yourself," I snap.

I hear him chuckle, so I steer my broom quickly to the left to get away from him. We both lose sight of the snitch as it reaches into the clouds and I stop my broom and hover in the air for a few moments before I see it reappear closer towards the grass. I glance at Draco, he's looking in the opposite direction and I smirk to myself as I take off after it.

I tilt the handle down and to the right as it hovers near a tree and I pull up at the last second before I run into a branch. I can hear Draco behind me as I weave through the threes and I reach out my hand with my teeth clenched as the golden ball flutters in front of me. I see Draco out of the corner of my eyes as I use the foot bars as leverage to lean forward a bit more. Almost...there... My fingers brush the small wings and I tilt my broom down a bit more to pick up speed as Draco cusses by my side. When I finally catch it, I'm so excited that I fly straight towards the ground and hop off the broom so I can gloat a little more freely.

"Oh, hell yes," I say with a smirk as I move the goggles to the top of my head. Draco lands beside me with a angry scowl as I give him a victory smile.

"I didn't even let you win," he snap angrily as he takes off his goggles. I grin as I turn the snitch off and throw it up in the air, letting it fall back into my palm.

"That was sweet of you," I say with a smirk as he takes off his gloves.

"Do you want to go again?" he asks as he throws his broom over his shoulder. "Even though I think two out of the three officially makes me the winner."

"Oh, when you say it like that," I joke with a laugh and he raises an eyebrow in challenge. "No," I answer with a head shake as I crack my back. "I don't want to embarrass you again."

"Oh, really? You want to go there?" he says as he starts approaching me.

"Already went there," I tell him with a smirk. I know what he's doing, he has that predatory look in his eyes. I give him one last amused look before hopping on my broom and taking off.

"Fuck," I hear him his as he fumbles around with his gloves. "You are not going to like what happens when I catch you," he calls and I look at him over my shoulder as he hops on his broom to chase me.

"I just might," I call back to him as I steady my broom with one hand while using my other lower the goggles.

"It's saucy things like that that get you trouble," he says and I laugh as I fly my broom higher over the grounds.

We pass over the horse stables and the gardens and we even cross small pond were geese are gathering in small parties. It's when we get towards the outside of the estate that Draco finally catches up to me. He grabs the back of my broom, yanking it back. I scream from the surprise and clutch the handle tightly because I almost fell off. I glare at him as he angles our brooms until we land on the hard ground.

I let my broom rest between my legs as Draco walks around until he's facing me.

"Got you," he says as he tries not to smile.

"Only because I let you," I lie.

"Hardly," he scoffs and then he approaches me with languid steps as I hold my broom loosely in my left hand.

He's wearing a pair of tight riding pants and a very vibrant royal blue polo shirt that looks so... good on him. I realize that I'm blatantly checking him out and I look away quickly with a blush on my cheeks.

When I gather the courage to look back at him, he's staring at me.

The look in his eyes...

"Why are you looking at me like that?" I ask nervously and he eyes darken as he tilts his chin down.

"I like watching you ride," he says softly. He takes off his gloves and stuffs them in his back pocket. "Your body..." he trails off as he gives me an appreciative once over before his silver eyes find mine. "You have no idea what you do to me."

"What?" I say shyly. Sometimes I can act so stupid and I wish I was more confident with this kind of sexy banter.

"I've had the patience of a bloody saint," he says dryly, his eyes slightly narrowed and he takes off the goggles and throws them on the ground. "Do you have any idea how turned on you make me?" he says and I swallow the lump in my throat. I thought we were having a nice innocent game of backyard Quidditch, but now he looks like he wants to eat me.

There's no doubt that Draco turns me on too. In fact, sometimes when I'm around him I think my body is going to explode I want him so badly... but when he gets that dark look in his eyes I just know that if I give in... I probably will never go back to being myself again.

"Draco..." I say softly when he stands in front me. He takes the broom from my hand and drops it on the ground; it lands with a thump. Then he carefully takes off my riding gloves and goggles. "What are you doing?"

"I have wanted to fuck you for so long," he says and my cheeks blush scarlet. What are you supposed to say when someone says something like that to you? "I'll wait if you want me to. Fuck," he says as he puts his forehead against mine and brings one hand up to squeeze my breast as he clenches his eyes shut.

I've been making him wait, I know that. Since the night of the ball, every time we've been alone, I've stopped us from going forward because I wanted to be smart about it. I know he's been getting frustrated with me, but he hasn't shown it until now.

I bite my lip and bring my hand up to his to gently pull it away. "I'll wait for as long as it takes but I am starting to break. I have never been this patient with anyone." He looks me in the eyes. "Do you understand what that means?"

"Not really," I whisper like an idiot and a ghost of a smile appears on his lips before it vanishes.

Then he kisses me hard and fiercely. The surprising forcefulness of it makes me falter and I put my hands on his chest, carefully pushing him back as I quickly look around the grounds. We're outside again. I don't feel comfortable doing things outside like this.

"Do you feel what you do to me?" he asks feverishly as he unbuckles the belt on his riding pants and he grabs my hand.

I don't say anything. I'm too nervous.

He pulls my hand inside of his pants so I can feel his very obvious arousal and he presses himself into my body as he bites his lip. It's not like I haven't seen it, or felt it, before... but the way he keeps looking at me is making me feel all kinds of uncomfortable. I don't like the way he's looking at me but a part of me doesn't want him to stop either.

How messed up is that?

"I want you so badly," he says. He brings his face down to my neck where he sucks and kisses so hard it actually kind of hurts. "I don't want to share you with anyone," he whispers against my throat like I wasn't supposed to hear it.

"We're outside," I whisper nervously.

"I bet you're wet for me already," he says with a smirk against my neck. He had given me a pair of woman's riding pants to borrow for the day, and he starts to unbutton them. I quickly pull my hand out of his pants and step back when he tries to un-tuck my shirt. "What is it?" he snaps and I shake my head.

It's almost too intense sometimes. I don't say anything and he sighs before bringing a hand up to my my face and he strokes my cheek softly before he kisses me again. It starts gently at first, and I become comfortable with the softness of it... and then, true to form, he deepens the kiss and I oblige, tilting my head back and opening my mouth for him when he nips my lower lip.

"Jeez," I whisper as I try to catch my breath once I push him back again. He glares at my hands. "What?" I ask in defense.

"You're too innocent," he says and I'm not sure if I should be insulted or not. He steps back and shakes his head. "The fantasies I have would make your head spin."

He cracks his neck before turning around. He buckles his pants and then starts to pick up our riding gear.

"What does that mean?" I ask softly. I tuck my shirt back in and button my pants again as I watch him.

"It means... " His eyes flick to mine before he picks up his broom. "Nevermind," he says flatly as he bends down to pick up my gloves. "It doesn't matter. Forgive me for being so forward," he says dryly with his jaw tight.

He can't even look at me now, and that makes me feel bad for some reason.

"I'm sorry," I add hopelessly as I let my arms hang limp at my sides like a rag doll. Sometimes I wish I was more like Pansy, more worldly and cultured about things like this.

"You have nothing to be sorry about," he says as he picks up my broom and hikes it under his arm with his Nimbus. "It's my fault for being too needy. I will not approach you like that again."

"No... I..." I trail off awkwardly as his face snaps towards mine. "I don't mind. It's just... I get nervous, you know?" I sound so young and stupid. I wish I could be more experienced in this area for him.

"I don't want to pressure you," he says and I shake my head.

"You're not...It's just that we're outside," I say as I look around me and I cross my arms. "Anyone could see us."

"I wouldn't comprise you like that," he says seriously. "No one can look at you like that but me," he says flatly and I bring a hand up to my neck. "But it's not just from being outside. You always work me up to a certain point just to pull back at the last moment. It's frustrating for me," he says and furrow my brows.

"I don't mean to do that," I admit. "I just... I like being with you and I want to do things..."

"Then why do you look at me like I'm one step away from raping you every time I get the slightest bit turned on? I can't help it, Ginny. I'm a man and you're my girlfriend. I'm allowed to want that from you."

"I... I know," I whisper because I'm not sure how I feel about this.

"You give me these 'come fuck me' eyes and then when I do respond you suddenly act like I'm a predator that's going to devour you. You make me believe you want me and then you push me away."

"That's not true," I say with a head shake, taking a step closer to him. "We do other stuff... I do want you. You know that."

"Other stuff," he scoffs. "Other stuff is nice, Gin, don't get me wrong, but I want to _feel_ you," he says seriously and my insides turn nervously. "I've never felt this way before and I want to f_eel_ all of you. Sometimes I feel like you're teasing me for your own amusement. Why don't you trust me enough?"

"I do," I say as I bring my hand up to rest on his chest. "I don't mean to tease you and I do trust you. I..." I stop myself from saying what I'm thinking.

"You what?" he snaps, annoyed with my delay. "What were you going to say?"

"I..." I lick my lips and then look at his throat before flicking my eyes to his. "I think I love you."

He's silent for a long time, and it's painful. I let my hand drop, but he grabs it before it falls.

"You think?" he asks in whisper as he raises one of his eyebrows. I guess that wasn't the best thing to say and I shake my head.

"I know," I tell him as I reach up on my toes to place a kiss on the corner of his mouth. "I love you."

"Look at me," he says softly and when I finally muster the courage to do it, he smiles warmly at me. "My sweet little Ginny," he says as he runs his hands up and down my arm. "I didn't realize how much those words would please me," he says with a handsome smile and I smile hesitantly back.

He keeps stroking my arm and I inhale a deep breath that I didn't realize I was holding. He doesn't say anything, and it's getting a little awkward so I look back at his large home. Even at this distance it's huge and intimidating.

"When you were young, did you ever play hide-and-seek in your house?" I question to smooth over the tension I feel. Shouldn't he like say it back or something? I feel very exposed right now... "I feel like a person could get lost there," I add with an uncomfortable smile.

"People have," he admits. "Do you want to go inside?" he asks as he looks me over with his cheeks flushed from our ride. I give him a pleading look because I want him to say something else... I've never told a boy I loved him before and this is not how I imagined it going. "I could give you a tour."

"Are your parents home?" I question softly. I should have found that out first, actually. A house-elf was sent to retrieve us after the fireworks the night of the ball and I didn't get to see much more of his house... Manor. It's not actually a house. I have no idea why I keep thinking of it that way.

"They're gone," he says seriously as he takes out his wand. "We'll just have to stay away from the front of the house. It's the third Wednesday of the month and the house is open for public viewing until five."

"Public viewing?" I say with my nose crinkling.

"This is one of the grandest estates in England," he says as he gathers up our things. "It's open to the public every now and then."

"Does anyone ever steal anything?" I question because I don't have much faith in the public. "That seems like a lot of trust just to have anyone in your house."

"They're tagged of course," he rolls his eyes. "We don't just let every bum into our house."

"Oh," is all I say as he puts his arm around my waist. "What are you-"Before I can get that question out, he Apparates us to a room in the Manor. "How can you Apparate inside your wards?" I question with a frown. "We can't do that at our place."

"Our wards are probably more advanced than yours," he explains as he heels out of his shoes. "We can't Apprate directly in or out, but we can travel within," he explains and I finally look around me.

It's a bedroom.

A very large and very masculine bedroom that has it's own living room in it.

"I thought you were giving me a tour?" I question nervously. The floors are covered in beautiful white carpet, and I take off my shoes quickly because I don't want to get it dirty. It's just so lovely in here.

There's a large marble fireplace in between two large doors that have beautiful molded designs around them. A large mirror is over the fireplace and my eyes follow the lines up to the golden chandelier that hangs down from the ceiling like something from a fairy tale. This is the most beautiful bed room I've ever been in and I sigh longingly while looking at the silky looking beige furniture and maroon throw pillows. There are two high backed chairs and a wooden carved loveseat set up around a small table and it looks like a scene from a magazine.

Draco moves about the room, but I'm too busy staring at everything around me take too much notice.

The walls are an olive green color, with a pattern printed on top of it in a darker green, and it's divided by white paneled wood. I want to touch it, but I refrain. I let my eyes linger on the posh looking writing desk against the wall before looking at the bed.

What a bed.

It's on a small platform, a few steps higher than the rest of the room and I inhale a shaky breath. It's a large bed, ten times bigger than my twin size one at home. It has a million plush pillows onto of a soft looking gold and green comforter. I almost want to take a nap just so I can sleep on it. I think it might feel like heaven.

"I am giving you a tour," he says and I glance at him. He's taking off his shirt his. I gulp. "This is my room," he says with a dark smirk. "Closet on the left," he says, nodding to one of the doors on the side of the fireplace. "Bathroom on the right."

He starts walking towards me, balling up his shirt.

"This is my floor, these are my walls," he says, his eyes never once leaving mine. "That's my ceiling," he says as I start backing up as he follows me. "This is my shirt," he says in a deep voice as he throws it to the side.

I look at his amazing torso before snapping my eyes to his.

"This," he says as he grabs my hand and pulls me towards him until I slam against his chest. "Is me talking to the girl who says she loves me."

"This is not the kind of tour I was talking about," I whisper to his neck.

This feels much more intense now. I know before, when we would mess around, I would toy with the idea of saying yes, of giving in and having sex with him; it's never felt this serious before. This felt way more deliberate and I feel like I don't have any control in this situation. It's like he's on a mission..a mission he is determined to win. He's looking at me like a predator ready to pounce on it's prey and I try not to look like I'm panicking. I don't want him to think that like he had said before. I don't want him to think I don't want him like that... but I have no idea what I want right now, actually. As confusing as that is.

"Alright," he says as he loosens his grip on my waist and he takes my hand, leading me up the three stairs to the amazing looking bed. "I'll get back on track," he says with a smile as he takes a step back to give me some more room. "This is my bed." He nods towards it and then looks back at me with darkened eyes."I think you should get better acquainted with that section of the tour, actually."

"Umm..."

That's all I say. I could kill myself for it, but I didn't know what else to do. I've never been in a sexy situation before and he's laying it on so thick that I might just melt.

"So," I say with a dry throat because he keeps on looking at me. "Is this you trying to seduce me?" I say, attempting to make it a joke, but he doesn't smile.

He walks towards me with slow steps and he loops his fingers into the belt loop of my pants. He pulls me closer to him and, like a zombie, I go along with it as he un-tucks my shirt. I don't even try to stop him when his fingers dance along my midsection until they reach the button on my riding pants. He undoes it without any objections from me and he slides them down my thighs until I'm left in my blue knickers. I inhale another shaky breath as he stands to full height to look down at me. I try not to shake.

"I'm not trying," he says deeply before he brings his hands up to my hair to hold me in place as he ravages my mouth.

I stop breathing. He's never kissed me like this before and it felt so much more intense and overpowering. My lips are burning when he pulls back and he stares at me deeply as he unbuckles his belt. I can't look away as he lets his pants drop; then he attacks me with another set of intense kisses that feel all consuming. I melt into it after a while as my mind goes blank from reason and I let myself get tossed on top of the covers. Draco stands before me looking all regal, and proud, and completely shaggable.

My shirt comes off.

His boxers get pulled down.

And then my bra and knickers get thrown some where.

I was shaking pretty terribly by the time he rested on top of me, slowing his kisses down until they were feather light and soft. "It's day time," I point out nervously because I always figured that people just had sex when it was dark in the middle of the night.

"I can see you better," he says in a husky voice. A grown up voice. I shiver as he kisses his way down my neck. "Why are you hesitating?" he asks against my throat. "I thought you loved me."

"But, what if your parents come home?" I ask nervously as he works his way around my body. From all the practice we've had, he knows exactly where and when to touch me to get me turned on. It was something I was regretting right about now.

"Nothing is going to happen," he says softly in a calming voice as he takes my hand and puts it in his hair. I guess he likes it when I run my fingers through it, so I do so with a shaky hand. "No distractions. No rain, no fireworks, no annoying people..." he trails off as he sucks on my collar bone. "All you have to do is say yes."

I don't say anything to that, and I don't move. After a while, he sighs and rests his forehead against my stomach before glancing up at me.

"You can say no," he says with an eyebrow arched.

"I know..." I say awkwardly.

I don't say anything else and I advert my eyes from his gaze.

"I'm accustomed to getting what I want," he says and I cover my breasts with a sheet as he rests beside me. "This is one of those rare occasions where I can put my needs aside until you want it as much as I do," he says flatly and I bite my lip and bring my hand up to cover my face. "But do not be mistaken," he says and I glance at him. He looks very serious. "I do want you and I want you now."

With that he gets up and sits at the edge of the bed with his hands on his knees. For some reason I feel guilty... or bad. I do want him, that's not a question and I think the only thing holding me back right now is my fear and inexperience.

Everyone but me has done it in this circle. It's not such a big deal and I love Draco.

I furrow my brows at the thought and sit up.

I look at the bracelet on my wrist and finger the dragons for a few seconds before making my decision. He's the best boyfriend I've ever had and I want to be close to him.

I lean over and kiss his arm. He gives me a sharp glance like I was doing something untrustworthy. "You shouldn't kiss me right now," he says, facing forward again. "I'm trying to calm everything down," he says as he takes in a breath and gestures in between his legs. "Literally," he adds and I nod my head.

Oh.

After a few moments, he stands up and puts on his boxers. I sit up on the bed and pull my knees up to my chest. He looks really disappointed and a part of me is disappointed in myself.

"Wait," I whisper as he starts to pull up his pants. He pauses before buckling them and he gives me a curious look. I don't want him to think I'm too young and stupid. Everyone thinks that about me and I want Draco to see me differently. I want him to love me as a woman. "Wait," I say as I sit up on my knees, covering myself with the sheet, and I reach my hand out to him. "Come back."

He gives me a look. "I'm not in the mood to be played with, Ginny."

"No," I shake my head and grab his hand to pull him closer. "I want you too," I tell him before tilting my chin up to kiss him. "I want to do this."

I feel his lips turn into a smile and he takes off his clothes again, settling back on top of my as I lean on the bed.

"I want you to be sure," he says as he uses his fingers to get my body ready again. "I don't want you to regret this."

I remember saying something similar to Daphne, and I shake that thought away because I don't want to think of anything else right now.

"I won't," I say with a head nod. I kiss his neck and shoulder with feather soft kisses.

He takes his time getting my body turned on again, kissing his way around and touching me in my most sensitive places. I'm a shaking aroused mess by the time he's done and I lick my lips as lays beside me, using his fingers to stroke me down there and pulling them out to look at the wetness that lingers. I blush scarlet and he looks down at me, using his free hand to move some hair from my face. I give him a nervous smile and he presses his lips against mine. I'm not as nervous right now... this feels more like my idea... He gets on top of me and positions himself in between my legs as I hold my breath and try not to shake.

"Ready?" he asks softly with a charming smile on his face as he looks down at me.

I can't speak, so I just nod my head and grip his shoulders. He starts to push in and I tighten my jaw because it feels weird and it actually kind of hurts. I inhale a sharp breath and clench my teeth together as he kisses the corner of my mouth. I refuse to cry, but the pressure I feel down there really makes me want to.

"It's okay," he whispers against my ear and I bring a hand up to his neck as he rests his head by my shoulder. "God, you feel amazing," he adds like he was talking more to himself than to me.

The moment feels like it's taking forever and all I can think about is how this is it... I can never undo this moment. I will never be a virgin again and if I get married to someone different, I will not be untouched on my wedding night. I slam my eyes shut and will myself not to cry. This time it's not because of the pain that my eyes are welling up, but I try to hold them back. With one final push, he's all the way in and I finally let out that breath I was holding.

I need to stop worrying about things... and this really hurts.

"Draco," I whisper softly as my legs shake around him. There's a whine in my voice that I wish sounded more stable.

I think he's giving me a moment to get accustomed to the feeling, because he hasn't moved yet. It still hurts, but the pain is dulling to just a minor ache as my body adjusts to accommodate his. He pulls back to look into my eyes. His hair is slightly disheveled and falling into his silver eyes that are catching the light at just the right angle making them shine like metal.

"I love you," I say with a girlish sob in my throat as I lean up to kiss him.

I wasn't exactly planning on telling him that again. I knew the relationship was still new, but if I was comfortable enough to have sex with him, then I should be comfortable enough to tell him how I really feel. For some reason it makes me feel better that I'm doing this with someone I love first. Even if that someone is a Malfoy.

He smiles a little, it's actually a heart warming smile, and he leans down to kiss me. He seems happy now and he slowly starts moving his hips up and down, sliding his length in and out of me. I've never done this before, so I'm not sure what to do with myself.

Draco lifts one of my legs and puts it around his waist and then he puts his hands underneath my back to pull me closer when he starts going faster. The mattress bounces with each movement and I start feeling a tingling friction in between my legs with each movement of his pelvis. When it starts feeling good, I bite my lip and turn my head to the side as I try to keep myself from making any embarrassing noises. I put my right hand on his back and I run my fingers up and down his spine just because I can. I've never felt this... _full_ before and it was an altogether odd sensation.

"I like that," he says in a breathless voice as he pounds into me. I keep running my hand up and down my back because he said he liked it and I kiss his shoulder just so I can get closer to him. With every new angle, and every hard thrust, came a different kind of pain and sensation and I bit my lower lip as I tried to just ride it out. "You look so sexy right now," he says, looking over my face.

No one has ever called me sexy before and I kiss him passionately to distract myself from everything that's going on and the odd noises our bodies are making as they work against each other..

Draco sits up a bit more and holds my hips tightly in his hands as he starts ramming into me with so much intensity that I bite my hand from yelling out or asking him to stop. It gets better after the first time, Pansy had told me that, and I need to just let this happen. My right hand starts tingling with each thrust of his hips and I glance at it quickly when Draco removes my hand so he can bend down and suck on my neck. Little red lines are starting to glow on my hand, just like they did when I took that oath with Draco, and I widen my eyes.

"What is that?" I whisper as I slightly push him back.

He doesn't seem bothered by it. He grabs my hand and pins it to the bed, intertwining his fingers with mine before kissing me heatedly. I get lost in the kiss and how hard and fast he's going. In fact, I've moved up the bed from his thrusts and I use my free hand to hold onto his headboard so I don't hit my skull. I wrap my legs around his waist and secure them together with my ankles because I fear I might go off the bed if he keeps moving as he is. He brings his left hand up to my hair, where he gathers some of it and holds onto it tightly, keeping me in place as he kisses me with his tongue and teeth. It kind of hurts, so I gasp and raise my hips. It hurts in a good way, actually, and I figure I must be some kind of freak.

"Tell me again that you love me," he says as he bites my lower lip, sucking the pain away before pulling back to look down at me. "Say it again. I want to hear you say it," he says in an uncharacteristically breathless voice.

"I love you," I whisper as I look into his darkened eyes. "Draco..." I say with tears in my eyes because of the pain, and the moment, and the importance of this act.

Is he going to say it back?

He smirks again and then tightens his jaw as he gets up on his forearms. The new angle in which he's moving sends a pleasurable hum down my body and I look down. I can see where we're connected and my eyes tear up again for whole other reason. This is the closest a person to get to someone else and I love him and it's almost perfect.

I'm just an emotional mess today.

"God," he whispers and then he shakes his head and clenches his eyes shut. "Not yet," he whispers as he pulls out of me and he sits back, placing his fingers on me down... _there._

"What are you doing?" I whisper because I feel almost empty without him now.

"What kind of gentlemen would I be if I just got off without letting ladies go first?" he says as he uses his arm to wipe off his forehead.

That's when I notice I'm sweating as well and I run my fingers through my damp hair as he works my body into a pre-orgasim state. He looks so hot right now, with his hair a mess and his cheeks flushed in arousal. I can't believe he actually wants me as much as I want him.

I start making little noises through my lips as my body starts the tingling sensations that I know so well from being with him.

"Do you like that?" he asks and I nod my head and bite my hand again to keep from making noises as I arch my back. He smirks sinfully and uses he free hand to remove it. "Tell me that you like it or I'll stop," he challenges letting the hand slide down to my breast to caress me there.

I'm so sensitive right now that it sends a tremor right to my core and he laughs a little when I make a moaning sound that I try to muffle. I figure this is him talking dirty during sex and I try to overcome my embarrassment as I lift my hips.

"I like it," I whisper in a hoarse voice as I put my hand over his to show him exactly were I want to be touched right now. He looks over my body as he licks his lips and raises his brows when we make eye contact again.

I know it's going to happen soon, but for some reason I feel frustrated. I feel empty after having him in me and I furrow my brows as I try to get more movement from his fingers. I want him. I want all of him in me again and I don't think I can say that out loud.

"What do you want, Ginny?" he asks darkly and I grab his arms and pull him on top of me so he'll get the hint. He smiles as I spread my legs wider for him.

He doesn't do anything, he doesn't move, and I reach a tentative hand down between out bodies until I touch him down there and guide him into my body.

He lets out a long breath as he starts pushing in and I bring my hands back up to his shoulders as I enjoy the feeling. "What a good girl you are," he says breathlessly before sliding all the way in.

All it took was that one stroke at that right angle and I was seeing stars. I arch my back and actually call out from the intensity of it as I wrap my legs tightly around him. I almost push him off of me because the feeling is so intense, but I can't get my limbs to move properly. It barely registers with me how fast he's going now because my body is so sensitive and I'm coming down from the ultimate high.

I'm a breathless, sweaty, smiling, mess when he finally thrusts one last time as every muscle in his body tightens. He exhales slowly and pumps a few more times before resting his body totally on mine and whispering my name. That pleases me and I smile as I kiss his ear. I try to catch my breath; I have no idea why I'm so out of breath... I barely even moved during this whole ordeal. I bring my hand up to his hair and run my fingers through it as I glance at my right hand. The red lines are gone.. I must have imagined it.

He kisses my shoulder before sliding out of me and we both sigh. When he rolls beside me, we stare up at the ceiling in silence for a while before I start crying. There's a painful throb in between my legs and I turn on my side and hold myself to deaden it... but it doesn't hurt _that_ bad.

This is just ridiculous. Why am I crying?

"Are you okay?" he asks as the tears leak from the corner of my eyes and I nod my head, trying to wipe them away quickly. "Hey, what's wrong?" he asks in concern as he turns on his side and pulls me to face him.

I sniffle like a pathetic thing as he puts his hand on my face, wiping tears away with his thumb.

"Did it hurt that badly?" he asks and I shake my head. "I tried to be gentle," he says like he was scolding himself for it.

"It ended up feeling good," I admit with a blush and he gives me a gentle smile.

"It felt awesome on my end," he says with a smirk and when I don't smile back he sighs. "Come here," he whispers as he pulls me to him.

I don't know why I'm crying, actually. This is just such a big important step that every girl has to go through. I wonder if I look any different. He lays on his back and rubs my arm as I get comfortable against his chest, letting silent tears slip out onto his skin.

"Do you wish you wouldn't have?" he asks flatly after a few silent moments and I shake my head again.

"Of course not," I say because it's true. Regret isn't what I'm feeling right now. I have no idea what it is I'm feeling... but that isn't it.

He squeezes my arm. "Then why are you crying?"

"I don't know," I admit in a pitiful whisper. I close my eyes when he kisses the top of my head.

He lays there with me for an hour, just holding me and staying silent. I listen to his heart beat as I look out of one of his large windows on the far wall. It's a perfectly lovely day, with blue skies and fluffy white clouds.

"I'll be right back," Draco whispers as he slides away from me.

I watch him get up and walk towards one of the doors on the right side of the fireplace. He doesn't even bother to cover his nudity like I would and I pull the covers back to look at my body. I don't know if I was expecting to look different now that I had finally had sex, but my body seemed more mature to me somehow, like it was finally evolved into that of a woman. I know that's silly. This is the same body that I was in this morning, but it had never made love until now.

I see a bit of blood on the green sheets and I sigh loudly when I realize what that is.

I can never undo this.

And I'm okay with that... I'm pretty sure.

I pull the covers back up when Draco comes back into the room, holding a small golden vial in his hand.

"What is that?" I question as he slides back beside me on the bed.

He hands it to me.

"Drink it," he says seriously as he moves some hair away from my face. I turn it and hold the vial up to the light so I can study it closely. "Unless you would like to have my child at sixteen, I would suggest drinking it," he adds after I don't obey him right away.

I didn't even think about that. How thick I am?

I unscrew the lid and sniff it before downing it all in one shot. It tastes odd, like chocolate milk just a day old and I crinkle my nose as I hand the vial back to him.

"That will last for three months," he says as he sets it on his night stand. "You'll have to remind me to give you more later."

I don't say anything to that since he's just assuming I'll sleep with him again.

He's assuming right, of course, but still.

We lay in silence for a while again, and I nearly fall asleep until he says my name.

"Did you mean it?" he questions lightly.

I turn my head so I can see his profile. "What?"

"When you said you loved me," he says as seriously as he turns his face to look into my eyes. "Did you mean that?"

I nod my head.

"Of course you did," he says as he studies my face. "You rarely lie." I furrow my brows at that odd statement as he smooths out my hair.

"I lie all the time to my parents," I admit with a guilty conscience and he kisses me softly on the lips.

"You don't lie to me," he points out and he's right so I nod my head.

Why hasn't he said it back yet?

I know I'm jumping the gun on this, but he could at least reassure me that he likes me a little bit.

"I'm not the nicest person in the world," he says seriously and I bite my lip uncomfortably. "I'm not nice like you are."

"I'm not always nice," I mumble and he raises an eyebrow.

"Yes, you are," he says with a head shake. "Even when you're trying to be mean you always give an opening for a second chance."

I shrug because I can't do anything else.

He takes a strand of my hair and he twirls it around in his fingers. "It looks like copper right now," he says softly. "The lights hitting it just right."

"Draco," I say nervously to get him out of the musing about my hair color. "I told you that I loved you. Aren't you going to..."

"Say it back?" he finishes the tough question for me. I just stare at him. "I don't even say those words to my parents," he says flatly and I start to get up to gather my clothes because I suddenly want to go home, but he grabs my arm.

I snap my face to his as he sits up until his legs are pressed into my side. He kisses me, but I push him back and scoff.

Honestly.

"It's very difficult for me to say those words," he says like it made sense.

"Well, I never slept with anyone until you, so there's a first time for everything." I'm getting kind of angry right now because I'm hurt that he doesn't feel the same. We did just make love, after all. The least he could do was say it back.

He brings his hands up to his lips and he rubs his mouth. I scoff at him and get up, angrily throwing on my clothes. I ignore his protests for me to return and the pain between my legs as I slip on my shoes and leave his room. I inhale a deep breath before taking off down an unfamiliar hallway. I turned down another corridor, and then another, and then I found a back stair way, and then another large hallway... Where is the fucking front door?

I'm officially lost by the time I reach another large hall that's home to suits of shining armor all lined up in a row like corpses. I take a seat on one of the viewing benches with my arms crossed angrily; I'm tired of walking. A place this big should have maps on every wall. I sit there for fifteen minutes until I hear footsteps coming down the hallway and I look up to see Draco walking towards me with his hands in his khaki slacks, wearing that blue polo shirt he seduced me in. I look away angrily and debate whether I should run away from him, but that's just a childish thought.

"Lost?" he says softly, trying not to smirk at me as I glare up at him.

When I don't say anything he sighs and kneels in front of me. He places a bag down on the floor and when I see it, I realize it's mine. I wouldn't have gotten very far with out it.

"Look," he says sternly as he forces me to look at him. "Your anger right now is ridiculous but not totally unfounded," he adds after my nostrils flare. He licks his lips before continuing. "I do love you, Ginny," he says and I uncross my arms as my heart leaps. He brings his hands up to my face. "And I'm pleased that you feel the same way, but I'm always hesitant to use those words. Love is a weakness in an ambitious man. My Grandfather always said that to me and I believe it."

"I was always taught the opposite," I say softly. I'm not angry anymore. He said he loved me and I feel like I'm floating on a cloud. Love was always seen as a strength in my household. I put my hands over his and I let him bring them down to my lap.

"Love is the only thing that can make a sensible person do stupid things. It's the most dangerous form of magic," he says and then he sits back on his heels. "I don't want you thinking I don't, though," he says as he puts his hands on my knees. "I've felt things around you that I've never felt before. I can be myself and let my guard down. I don't have to worry about your motives."

I smile and lean in to give him a hug, rapping my arms around his neck as I kiss his ear. Maybe it's my stupid teenager heart, but I'm officially better.

"So," I say softly once he pulls back. "What are your ambitions then, you ambitious man?" I ask to lighten the mood.

"I have many," he says with a sinful smile. He stands up and holds out his hand for me to take. "But I can show you my newest project if you promise to be discreet."

"I'm great at being discreet," I say with a smile as I let him pull me down the hallway with my bag over his other shoulder.

We take another back stair case and go through a large white sitting room before heading down a rather narrow wooden stairway that leads into a kind of basement. It smells like earth and burnt things and I cross my arms as Draco lifts his wands to light the torches. It looks like a torture chamber and I give Draco a look.

"It looks this way for a reason," he assures me. "Stand back, by the stairs."

I obey and go where he told me. I watch curiously as he lifts his wand and flicks it a few times until a jet of red light hits the opposite wall. Then the walls start to shake and I hold onto the railing as a loud, billowing noise fills the decayed hall.

I scream when the fire manifests itself. I know what that is. Fiendfyre, cursed fire, and I nearly start running as it takes the form of a large hissing snake, growing in size until it reaches the top of the large room. It hisses and spits and then starts burning up the entire room.

"Draco!" I scream because cursed fire is very dark magic that can not be controlled. "We have to get out of here!" I'm already sweating from the heat and I can barely breath. He doesn't move, he lifts his wand at the destroying mass and I run over to him to pull him out of the room.

He flicks his wrist a few more times and the hissing spitting fire snake stops. It freezes in midair and I watch it with wide eyes. When Draco moves his wand to the left, the snake's head turns that way, when he moves it to the right, it turns that way as well and I put my hand over my mouth.

"You can control fiendfyre?" I whisper as he as he continues to point his wand at the dangerously hot mass, making it move and turn in all different directions. He smirks. The fire reflects in his eyes. "Only powerful Dark Wizards can do that," I point out as I give him a troubled look.

"I can do more than that," he says as he swishes his wand. The fire disappears, leaving scorched walls behind it and when he turns to me, I take a step back. I've never seen anyone just get rid of cursed fire... I read that it had to just burn out. "I have more control over it than any wizard in history and I can get rid of it just as fast."

"How can you do that?" I ask worriedly. Cursed fire is one of those terrible curses that even the darkest of the dark wizards rarely use. It destroys everything it touches and it's impossible to control. I've read that even Voldemort can only control it for a few seconds before it goes on it's own.

"I found the spell you need to control it. I invented it," he says with a proud smile as he looks at me. "Brilliant, right?" he says and I nervously nod my head. There are ash marks on his face from the billowing fire and his eyes look dark. "Do you have any idea what this means?" he says and I shake my head worriedly. "It could revolutionize warfare. No one has ever controlled fiendfyre like this before," he says as he walks to the middle of the room where the stones are still smoking. "I've been trying to get it to downsize into a smaller scale. To get it to only focus on one target like a legitimate curse instead of eating everything in it's way."

"Why did you start doing this?" I ask softly and he looks at me with his hands on his hips.

"Because I could. I have all these ideas in my head," he says like he was relieved he could tell me. Sometimes he's so smart he reminds me of Hermione... if Hermione had an ego and dark ideas, that is. "It took me years to get this down."

"Does anyone know you can do this?" I ask seriously. Jesus, if Voldemort knew...

"No," he says as he walks back to me, placing his wand in his pocket. "Not yet. That's why I need you to keep this secret for me," he says as he looks into my eyes. "I wanted to share this with you because it's important, but during the school year I am going to teach you occlumency. We're getting closer and you need to be able to shield your mind because I guarantee that people will look in on you to find out about me."

I gulp.

"This is dangerous stuff Draco," I say seriously. "You're lucky it hasn't killed you yet," I say and he nods his head before walking towards the wall by the stairs. He uses his wand to remove one of the stones and he digs into it before he pulls out a note book and hands it to me.

_Prometheus_ is scrolled across the front of it and I give him a look before opening up. It's all numbers and letters and formulas.

"Everything in the universe goes back to math," he says as I flip through page after page of math problems that I can't make sense of. "Even magic. I don't do anything blindly," he says seriously. "I did the research on this and my theory was proven," he says with a pleased smirk. I look at him like I've never seen him before.

"I didn't realize how nerdy you were," I say and he laughs as he takes the notebook and puts it back in his hiding spot. "Do your parents know what you've done?" I ask and he shakes his head as he puts the rock back.

"Not yet," he says flatly and then he faces me again. "Aren't you impressed?"

"Yes," I say quickly because I am, but this is a little overwhelming. Dark magic makes me uneasy and to control that... I look at Draco... Geez, what else can he do?

He smiles again and walks closer to me, kissing my head. "Good," is all he says as he wraps his arm around my waist. Then he checks his watch. "I better get you back to the club," he says before cleaning us of the soot from the fire. "You have to change first," he says, nodding to my borrowed clothes. Oh, right.

I go to take my bag away from him, but he holds it out of my reach with a smirk. "You can change right here," he says as he looks over my body. "I would like to watch you."

"Don't be silly," I say as I try to retrieve my bag.

"I'm being serious," he says and I send him a look as he steps back. "I've already seen all of you today, Gin. You don't have to be modest around me anymore."

"Draco," I say with an eye roll as I step forward to get my bag again, but he puts it further out of my reach. "Stop being stupid."

"I'm not being stupid," he says seriously, his eyes slightly narrowing. "Do as I say," he says.

"Because you're asking so nicely," I say with an eyeroll and when I go to grab my bag again, he grips my wrist and kisses me. It throws me off guard and I gasp into his mouth as he pulls me close. The room is still hot from the fire, and I can feel sweat beading on my brow. "Come on, Gin," he says with a sinful smile. "Don't be a coward."

I scoff. He honestly wants to call me that? I step back and give him a challenging look as I start taking off my clothes. When I'm left standing in my bra and knickers, Draco lets his silver eyes slide down my body as I put my hands on my hips and raise my brows, trying to seem brave and confident. He smiles then, and takes a step towards me so he can touch my face tenderly. He kisses me softly on the lips before handing me the dress I had folded up in my bag. He helps me slide it over my head like I was a toddler.

"There," he says as he moves to my back and I put the hair over my shoulder as he zips it up. "That wasn't so hard, was it?" he asks as he hands me the heels I wear to work everyday.

I shake my head and smile little bit by how silly that just was.

"We should go," I say as I blink a few times and take my bag from him. "My Mom will be there soon."

When we finally get back to Folk Hills, Draco takes my hand and kisses the top of it as he looks into my eyes. My heart flutters when I remember that he loves me too. I try not to sigh wistfully. "Thank you for giving me your body today, Ginny," he says softly and my insides melt at the way he says my name. I blush and nod my head because I can't find my voice. "I'll see you later, babe," he says with a wink.

"Later," I say softly as I try to process every single thing that happened today.

"I'll send your broom and Quidditch gear to you later tonight."

I watch him pop away and then I go towards the back stairway to wait for my Mother. When she sees me, I quickly smooth out my clothes and stand up. When she looks at me I become very very very nervous. Can mother's tell when you've had sex? Can she see that I'm not a virgin anymore? I try not to panic as she smiles at me and we walk in silence to the Apparation point.

"You smell like fire," she says as she blinks at me and I shrug nervously.

"Strange," I say as I sniff my own hair and she nods.

"Very strange. You should take a bath when we get home."

I follow her orders and take a very long shower, running my hands over my body. Everywhere Draco touched.

I had sex today.

I clean my body and shampoo my hair. Once I'm finished I step out and towel dry, wiping off the steam from the mirror so I can look at my reflection.

I had sex today.

And I have a fucking hickey!

I panic and tilt my neck to see it as I move my wet hair out of the way. There's the dark bruise forming against the side of my neck and I widen my eyes as I stare at it. What was Draco thinking? God, what if my mother saw that?

I cover my neck with my hair and I get dressed in a set of casual clean clothes. I walk towards my room, hyper aware of my body and the changes it went through today.

I had sex today.

I can't stop thinking about it and the minor ache between my legs won't let me forget either.

I lay down on my bed and stare up at my ceiling until my Mom comes into the room.

"Ginny, honey, have you seen a bit of paper anywhere?" she asks. I sit up, raising my eyebrow and combing my hair over my right shoulder so it's covering the hickey on my neck.

"What?" I ask because that seemed awfully vague.

"You know, the bit of paper that your father and I leave in our drawer for emergencies," she says with a frown. "It has the ward password on it, written by our secret keeper."

"I know what you're talking about," I say so she won't describe it further.

"Right, do you know where it is?" she asks seriously. "I was cleaning this morning and it is not where it is supposed to be."

The last time I saw that... I gave it to Draco so he could pass our wards.

"I don't know where it is," I lie as I try to remember if he still has it... if I ever got it back from him.

"Okay," she says with her hands on her hips and she looks around my room. "I need to find it. You know how terrible it would be if it fell into the wrong hands."

"I'll let you know if I come across it," I say seriously and she nods her head before leaving my room. I sigh loudly and lean against my bed again.

I put my hand on my neck where the hickey is and I sneak out of my room, making sure my parents are no where in site as I creep down to the kitchen. I take out a spoon and put it in the freezer for a few minutes before pulling it out and running to my room again.

My roommates swear by this, and I go over to the mirror and move hair out of the way before placing the cold spoon on the bruise on my neck. I can't believe I have a hickey and it actually makes me smile for some odd reason. I think about Draco and I remember him saying he loved me too. I nearly start laughing like a fool as I go back to my bed and lay down against my pillows as I smile up at the ceiling with the cold spoon pressed against my neck.

What a wonderful feeling this is.

I start humming to myself and before I turn off my lights for the night, I go over to my window and open it just in case Draco wants to stop by.

Draco might be the definition of 'wrong hands' but his hands feel so damn good.

* * *

I have a terrible headache and I blink against the sunshine as hundreds of people crowd around me.

I'm standing by my mother on the platform and I play with the bracelet Draco had given me as I look around the crowd with a sigh, waiting to see someone I know so I can leave my freaking Mom. I know where Draco is, of course. I see him standing with Blaise and Crabbe by the train, but I can't just rush over to him right now with one of my parents watching. She would never let me freaking leave for school if she saw it.

"Now, Ginny, if you need anything please remember to write," she says and I roll my eyes as I cross my arms. "And please wear that necklace. With Snape in charge, you never know what will happen. I have half a mind to keep you out of school until Dumbledore comes back."

I shoot her an annoyed look but turn away once again.

I feel like I've run into a brick wall and my brain is throbbing. I haven't had a headache like this in years.

"Oh, my god," I hear her whisper and then she starts walking away from our spot with speedy steps, dropping one of my bags in the process. I glare at her as she makes her way through the crowd... and then I see what she's going after.

It's them.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione just came through the gate looking a little worse for the wear. They all have longer hair and paler complexions. I uncross my arms as I watch my mother embrace all of them in a fierce hug. They all look thin, and pale, and older than when they left...

..that night before my birthday...

I resist the urge to go over to them as well as I grumpily pick up the bag my mother had so carelessly thrown. I want to hug my brother and tell him I missed him, I want to confide in Hermione and see if she's okay, and Harry... I look at Harry as he steps away from my mother's all empowering hug and he scoots the glasses up his nose as the people around me start whispering about their arrival. Of course, he looks as handsome as ever and that annoys me.

Then he looks at me.

He had never looked at me like this before and it makes my insides turn oddly in the most unpleasant way. When he realizes that I'm actually looking at him too, he gives me a nervous, almost apologetic, smile. I quickly look away only to find Draco staring right at me as well.

He has his hands stuffed in the pockets of his tailored gray slacks and he tilts his chin up the slightest bit when someone crosses in front of us, breaking our connection. Once I can see him again, he raises an eyebrow and I glance over my shoulder only to find my mother crying and hugging the three of them once more.

I narrow my eyes and gather up all my bags and start wheeling my cart towards Draco. When he realizes I'm actually walking towards him, he smiles, and meets me half way to take the heavy bag off my shoulder.

"I didn't think you would have the guts to come over," he says. He takes the trolley away from me so I don't have to push it and he slings my bag over his shoulder so I'm left holding nothing. That was a very gentlemanly move on his part and I give him a pleased smile as he starts walking us away. "I was thinking I'd have to corner you on the train to get you to acknowledge me."

"I don't care what my mother thinks anymore," I say softly as he walks towards the train so he can give my main bags to the baggage handler for storage. "And I would have acknowledged you eventually," I admit with guilt as I approach his friends.

"Looking as pleasant as ever, Ginny," Blaise says with a fake salute on account of the hateful glare still on my face. I ignore him and the way stupid old Crabbe chuckled at it as I stand up straight and cross my arms again. "Looks like the prodigal son has returned," he adds as he looks in the direction of Harry who is now being swarmed by other people and news reporters.

"Why does anyone care?" Draco says with a head shake. "Do you care?" Draco asks me and I glance up at him.

"No," I say honestly and he winks as he puts his arm around my waist.

I nearly slide away from the contact because my mother could see... and everyone would understand my relationship with him... but I don't care anymore. My head hurts too much for me to care. I like him and that's all there is to it. He's wearing a tight fitting black shirt and it has a piece of string on it, so I take it upon myself to remove it for him.

"Are you grooming me?" he asks with an amused smile and I shake my head as I turn my head away from him. He has a pair of sunglasses folded up in the right breast pocket of his shirt, so I take them out and put them on my face. It helps with the headache. "You're in a good mood," he points out in amusement but I don't say anything.

I can feel eyes on me, so many eyes actually that I'm starting to feel uncomfortable. I send a look around the platform... The attention is divided between Harry's return and the fact that Draco is touching me so sweetly. Other students are staring at us with out a care now, whispering behind their hands and I'm glad I have sunglasses on so no one can see my glare. I guess seeing a Malfoy and a Weasley so intimate together is strange for most people.

I look up at Draco to see his reaction, but he doesn't seem to care much. His fingers are idly playing with the fabric of my shirt and he's talking to Blaise about some kind of security issue at Gringotts. I look down and start playing with the bracelet because everyone keeps looking and I let my fingers fiddle with the small dragons as I try not to be awkward about it.

"Gin," Draco whispers after a few moments and he tilts my chin up until I'm looking at him. "Relax."

I breath out and nod my head before turning more towards him when Zabini smirks at me.

I glance around once more until my eyes land on my brother.

He's noticed too.

Hermione is holding his arm, holding him back as he looks at me like he wants to ring my neck. My mother turns to see as well, and her eyes widen a fraction when Draco kisses the top of my head.

"Can we get on the train?" I ask quickly.

"What's the rush?" Blaise asks as he checks his watch. He licks his teeth and glances at me, his amber eyes shining against the sun. "The train won't leave for half an hour."

"I'm getting on the train," I say as I grab my bag from Draco and I head towards the door. "Do what you want," I hiss and Blaise raises his brows in surprise.

"That was a dramatic exit," Draco sighs as he follows me. I step onto the train and elbow my way down the hallway until I find an empty room. "The good news is that there aren't many people on the train," he says as he shuts the door and lowers the blinds. "And that means we've got time."

"For what?" I question as I climb up on the seat so I can put my bag in the overhead cabin. I gasp in surprise when Draco comes up behind me and pulls me down firmly with his hands on my hips.

"I think you know what," he says against my ear as he slides the sunglasses from my face.

"We can't," I whisper as I think of my family who are just on the platform thinking terrible, horrid things about me... I actually want to cry. "I'm sorry," I say gently as I turn around to face. "I have a headache."

"Wow," he says as he blinks at me. He folds up his sunglasses and hooks them back in his pocket "I didn't think I'd be getting that excuse from you so early in the game."

"I know," I say as I cringe. "And I'm sorry but my head really does hurt."

Draco stills my shaking hands. "It's okay," he says gently and then he kisses me. "I believe you."

"Did you look for that password?" I ask as I play with his shirt so I have something to talk about besides the obvious.

"I'm certain that I gave it back to you," he says with a furrowed brow.

"My Mom has been going mental trying to find it," I admit as I bring my fingers up to my temple to deaden the pressure of the headache. "She tore apart the house looking for it."

"I would tell you if I had it," he says seriously. "Wards are tricky business you don't want to play with."

I nod my head and take a seat by the window. He sighs and and opens the blinds like he knew nothing was going to happen and he takes a seat beside me as I cross my legs.

"Are you going work on your Prometheus project at school?" I question as he takes a book out of his bag. He glances at me. "Are you going to do anything with that?" I question.

"Probably," he says honestly as he opens his book. He's using my blue ribbon as a book mark again and I smile at it before looking into his face. "But I've got a lot of things to do this year," he says with a wink before getting comfortable and starting to read.

We're officially a boring old couple, I muse to myself, as I look out the window. After a while, students start to pile onto the train and the stares happen again as they pass by our window, looking in on us as Draco puts his hand on my knee while he reads.

"What book is that?" I question as he turns the page.

"The Biography of Nicolas Flamel," he says as he shows me the book cover. "Intriguing stuff, really."

"Was he really six hundred years old when he died?" I question as I turn my shoulders towards him and I place my hand on top of his.

"He was six hundred and sixty five," he corrects me and then he gives me a smile as he turns his hand to hold mine. "Kind of makes my Grandfather's age look like chump change."

"Jesus fucking Christ," Blaise opens up the cabin door with a dirty scowl on his face and I make a face at the noise. Draco raises his brows as he puts the ribbon back in the book to mark his place, setting the closed book against his lap. "I can not stand that ingrate bossing me around. He isn't even a proper wizard."

I've never seen Zabini so worked up about something and when Pansy walks in behind him, she gives us a look. "That beast of a caretaker really ripped into him for smoking on the platform," she explains with a frown.

"Like it's any of his fucking business what I bloody do," Blaise snaps and I furrow my brows. He is usually so blasé about things that his outburst is surprising to me.

"Hagrid?" I question because I figure that's who they're talking about.

"I'm surprised that bloated elephant has a name. He looks like some kind of mangy dog with only half the brains," Zabini seethes hatefully.

"Hey," I snap in defense. "I like Hagrid. He's very nice."

They all look at me.

"What?" I say as they give me condescending looks like I was an idiot. "He is."

"He's a half-breed, Ginny," Draco says with an eyebrow raised like he thought that would change my mind on the matter.

I give him a disgusted look.

"So?" I say hatefully and then I look back at Blaise. "You aren't allowed to smoke on the platform anyways," I point out. "It's against the rules."

"I do not take orders from half-breeds," he says coldly. He has that same look in his amber eyes that I saw when Draco was beating that thief in the forest. It's chilling. "Especially not from half-breeds who've had their wands snapped."

"Well, it looks like you did take orders from a half-breed," I hiss derisively. "You stopped smoking, didn't you?"

"You f-"

"That's enough," Draco cuts Blaise of sternly and he gives me a look. "Drop it."

I shake my head angrily and I cross my arms. My eyes flick to Pansy to see if she'd back me up, but she has her eyes slightly narrowed at me and when we make eye contact, she turns away. Daphne finds us next, followed by Crabbe and Goyle, but I don't greet them as I glare out the window, still upset about the comments that were thrown around about Hagrid. He's actually a dear friend of mine and that conversation did not make the pain in my head go away.

"You may want to get your wand out, Malfoy," Crabbe grunts as he takes a seat beside Pansy. "Weasley was out looking for you in the hallway. He looks like he wants to fight."

Draco's silver eyes slide to mine and he smirks. "I wonder why," he comments dryly and he puts his hand back on my knee, squeezing slightly.

"Hermione won't let him get this far," I say honestly as I look back out the window. If I know my friend, I know she'll stop him before he reaches the back of the train. "She usually keeps him in check," I add and Draco smirks at me.

"It's good to keep the dog on a leash," Pansy comments bitterly and I shoot her a hateful look.

"That's my brother you just called a dog," I say and she raises her eyebrows seriously.

"We're not talking about this," Draco snaps and he gives Pansy a death glare that shuts her up. Everyone becomes quiet as Draco digs through his bag. He pulls out a small bag of chocolates wrapped in shiny blue paper and he hands one to me. "Eat this," he says, stuffing the rest in his bag. "Your attitude has been less than pleasant today," he adds seriously.

I take it from him with a scowl and unwrap the chocolate before popping it into my mouth. How could he say anything about my attitude when it was his friends that were being the jerks? I huff in annoyance and cross my arms as the chocolate calms me down. It dulls the pain of my headache a fraction, so that's something.

"Better?" Draco asks, watching my reaction closely. I glance at him and nod my head. "Good," he says shortly before opening his book again.

When the train starts up, I tuck my legs underneath me as I look at the rolling scenery with my forehead against the glass. Draco puts his hand on my ankle, running his fingers back and forth like he was petting me. It puts me at ease from wanting to glare at everyone in the compartment. When we cross over the Scottish bridge I know that I have to change, so I get up to retrieve my bag, but Draco beats me to it.

"There are advantages to being tall," he says as he easily reaches my bag and hands it to me. "Go with her," he says, looking expectantly at Pansy and Daphne.

I resist telling him that I don't need babysitters because I don't want to make any more tension in the room. Daphne and Pansy get up dutifully and I don't even bother waiting for them as I open the door to the cabin and step out into the hallway.

I don't say anything as they follow behind me and when we get to the girls room, I pick an empty stall so I can change into my uniform. Pansy opens the door as I'm taking off my shirt and I gasp as she closes the stall door behind.

"What are you doing?" I hiss as I cover my chest with my shirt. "I'm changing."

"We have the same parts," she says with an eyeroll as she starts unbuttoning her blouse. "I just wanted to talk to you for a bit."

"What do you want to talk about?" I ask uncomfortably as I turn around and slip on a white tank top over my bra.

"Now that we're back at school... things are going to change," she says as I take out my white button down shirt and I put it on.

"What do you mean?" I ask as I poke the buttons through the holes. When that's finished, I look over my shoulder to make sure she's not looking before I pull down my shorts so I can put on the gray skirt.

"Well, there is a certain way you have to act now. During the summer we're obviously in our own company, but now we're integrated with everyone else."

"Okay?" I say as I zip up my skirt. I pull out a brush and tug it through my hair before pulling it back into a pony tail.

"There's just a certain way you'll be expected to act," she says and I narrow my eyes at the wall as I take out my tie and put it around my neck.

"Like calling nice men like Hagrid disgusting half-breeds?" I say as I turn around to face her. I raise my eyebrow as I do up my tie.

"No," she says, giving me a patient smile. "What I'm trying to say is that you can't act so... " she moves her hand around as she tries to find the words. "Available to everyone."

"What does that mean?" I question with a furrowed brow. She doesn't say anything right away so I pull out my vest and put it on before sitting on the bench to put on the knee socks.

"Ginny, you're dating Draco Malfoy now," she says as I roll the socks up. I take out my scuffed mary-jane shoes and she clicks her tongue. "No, no, no," she says as she takes the shoes away from me. I go to protest but she puts her hand up to cut me off. "Take the socks off."

"But..."

"It's not something you have to wear as part of the uniform. The socks cut off your legs and ruin the silhouette." she says as she pulls out a pair of black snake skin pumps from her bag. "You're not a child who wears mary-janes, thank you," she says as she hands the sky high heels to me.

I take them and shake my head. "I'm not wearing these," I say, trying to hand them back but she won't take them. "Even a one inch heel hurts my feet. I can't walk around in these all day."

I look at the shoes again, they have to be higher than three inches. I was glad when I was done at Folk Hills because I don't have to wear freaking heels anymore.

"This is what I'm talking about," she says flatly as she grabs my socks and starts pulling them off for me.

"Hey!" I snap as she balls them up and throws them over the stall wall.

"You're dating a Malfoy now; you are going to be held up to a different standard," she says as she sits back and runs a hand through her hair. "I'm not saying any of this to be mean," she adds because I think can tell how confused and hurt I am right now. "I'm being completely honest with you. Before you were little Ginny Weasley with no expectations and shabby clothes."

My cheeks heat in embarrassment.

"But now you are seriously dating the heir to one of the largest fortunes in England. Everyone is going to be judging you. It's unfortunate, but women in our situations are not judged by our character or intelligence. We're judged by how we look and how we present ourselves."

"I don't know if that's true."

"Think of any woman of influence," she says fiercely. "What they have to say takes a back seat to the designer they're wearing and how much weight they had gained. I'm not making this up, Ginny." She looks down at me with fire in her dark eyes. "No man has ever been asked what kind of shoes they're wearing but even women politicians get that question. It's an unfair double standard, but it happens."

The feminist in me wants to disagree, but the more I think about... I guess she's right in a way. "I'm not a woman of influence yet," I snap. I stand up. "And I doubt Draco would care about the shoes I'm wearing."

"He wouldn't say anything," she says with a dark eyebrow arched. "But he would notice. You love him, right?"

I nod my head.

"Then you want to look like you belong with him, don't you? You don't want people questioning why he's with you because, trust me, they are going to do that anyways. You have to look the part, Ginny."

I swallow the lump in my throat and rub my forehead with my hand. "Why do I have to change who I am?" I question. Draco hasn't had to change anything.

"You're not changing who you are," she says with an exasperated sigh. "We're just polishing the surface. I'm doing this for your own benefit. You're playing in a different arena now." I don't say anything. I just clench my jaw shut and take a heavy seat back on the bench. "The rules are different and you need to understand that. Men have history on their side and we have our bodies. We have to use that power to it's full potential and you can't do that wearing second hand, cheaply made, attire."

I scowl.

"Now," she says as she smooths our her uniform. "Put on the heels."

I pause for a moment before giving in and slipping them on my feet. "What are you going to wear?" I ask as I stuff all of my things back into my bag.

"I always bring extras," she says with a smile as she pulls out a pair of patent leather pumps. The heels hurt already and I'm not even standing up. I glare down at them.

"Ginny," Pansy says as she sits beside me on the bench. "I don't want to hurt your feelings," she says as she stares at my profile. "And I don't say things to you to be mean or hateful. I'm just trying to help. Draco really has feelings for you. I've known him long enough to see that and it's rare for him to care..." she trails off and I glance at her. "Make sure that you're compliant towards him and give him what he wants. He's a powerful wizard; he's going to be very successful and he will give you the world if you keep him happy."

Compliant?

That word made me want to vomit and I screwed up my face in disgust.

"School hasn't even started and I already hate it," I snap as I stand up and hike the bag over my shoulder.

"Don't say that," she says with a sigh. I unlock the door and step out. I go over to the mirror and dig out some lip gloss so I can apply it when the door opens and Romilda Vane comes bouncing in.

She's in my house and her bunk is always next to mine. We've never been close, though, there was always something desperate and gossipy about her personality that never clicked with mine. She stops when she sees me and she looks me over before running to my side.

"Oh, my god, Ginny Weasley," she says as she gives me a hug. I don't hug back, but she hardly notices. "Why on earth didn't you write me and tell me you were dating Draco Malfoy?"

I shrug. She doesn't help my headache either.

I wouldn't write her even if I got my right foot amputated let alone letting her know who I'm dating.

"It's heard rumors all summer, of course," she says as she glances down at my shoes. "Oh, those shoes! They are to die for. Are those Malcolm King's?" she asks as she bends down to get a better look at them. I shrug again. "Oh, they are. They're from his fall collection. How in the word did you afford something like that? Oh, I know, it's because of Draco, I bet. I thought you'd be wearing those nasty old shoes you always wear. It is so good to see you in something new. I was getting worried we'd have to start a shoe fund for you. I'm so jealous!"

I look in the mirror and see Pansy in the stall doorway, watching our exchange with her arms crossed. When we make eye contact, she raises her eyebrows.

"Yeah, it's good seeing you too," I say flatly as I put away the lip gloss and I turn towards Pansy. The comment Romilda made about my 'nasty old shoes' really proved her point. "You win," I state flatly before walking towards the door.

"I usually do," she says with mirth and I roll my eyes.

"Wait for me!" Daphne stumbles out of one of the stalls, running towards a mirror to fix her hair. "Don't leave yet," she says as she takes out a headband to pull back the glossy blond curls from her face.

"What took you so long?" I ask suspiciously as she rights her hair. Romilda tries to say something else to me, but the whole 'shoe fund' comment really put me off, so I ignore her until she goes away.

"She was probably using her compact to write naughty messages," Pansy says with a smirk

"Hey," Daphne says with a large grin. She pulls out a pair of earrings from her make-up bag. They have bright blue feathers on them and they look good against her skin. "A little sexting never hurt anyone." I laugh a little bit and when she's ready we walk towards the door once again.

Someone opens the door as I'm reaching for the handle, and I'm left staring at Hermione. We stare at each other for an uncomfortably long amount of time before she gives me a fake smile.

"Hi," she says as she sends a nervous glance to Daphne and Pansy who are stationed behind me.

"Hi," I say back.

There's so much I want to ask her right now, but I can't. Now is not the time and I'm still hurt by what they did to me. Leaving like that really bothered me and I doubt I'll get over it any time soon.

"Well, this was a pleasant chat," Pansy sighs loudly as she elbows past me and she grabs my arm. "Let' go then."

"Bye," I mutter to Hermione as I let myself get pulled away on these ridiculous high heeled shoes. I look over my shoulder once to see my old friend frowning at me and I turn away quickly.

I don't want to see it.

When we get back to the cabin, Draco and the other boys are already in their uniforms. Of course, Draco looks handsome in it and I nearly sigh when I see him. He's still reading that book, and when I sit beside him, I take his arm and rest my head against his shoulder.

"I like the shoes," he says quietly, never once looking up from the page.

I glance at the pumps, and then at Pansy who's giving me a critical look. "Thanks," I whisper softly, not bothering to say anything else.

The train ride goes by fast, and when we leave to get on the carriages I get bombarded by people I've never met before, asking me questions and inviting me to hang out. I had always fancied myself a bit popular within my house, but people from every grade and every house were coming up to me. It was really odd and I was glad when Draco put his arm around my waist and steered me away from the madness.

"Jeez," I whisper with a head shake as we climb into one of the empty carriages. "What was that all about?"

"People are curious," Draco says calmly as he puts his arm around my shoulders. "Most of them want to know how we got together, I imagine."

"Should we tell them that you relentlessly perused me until I finally broke down and gave you a pity date?" I look at him and smile.

"Is that the way you see it?" he asks with a smirk and he tilts his body more towards mine. Blaise gets totally cut off because he was sitting on the other side of us and I don't mind.

"Hm," I say, imitating his drawl. It makes him laugh. "You stalked me."

"That's how I get all my girlfriends," he says with a wink. "Stalking is endearing."

I smile and slick some of his hair back because it was falling in his eyes. He needs a hair cut. "Did your mother tell you that?" I ask jokingly and he smirks.

"She didn't have to," he says with his eyebrows lifted.

I start fingering that bracelet he gave me and then I look at his green and silver tie. "I hate that we're in different houses," I say softly because I don't want the other people hearing how sappy I'm sounding. He has been my closest friend this summer and I'll miss sleeping beside him. There's no way he can get into my room at Hogwarts.

"I get my own room this year," he says in a soft voice. "Being head boy and all," he says with a sinful smile.

Zabini coughs uncomfortably and I pull back. I'm glad when the carriage stops... but as we walk towards the great hall, I realize I'm about to be put into a very uncomfortable situation. It's the first feast of the school year and I _have_ to sit with my house.

"I'll be stalking you from across the room," Draco says before kissing my cheek. I watch him and the whole gang I've been hanging out with all summer walk towards the Slytherin table and I stand to the side, staring at my own table in disappointment.

I don't know where to sit. Normally I would just sit by Hermione when she was actually here for the feast, but if they were gone I would sit by Dean and Seamus... but Dean saw me making out with Draco in the club's pool so that would be uncomfortable. I don't really like the girls in my year and the ones above and below me aren't much better. I sigh and scan the table until I find Neville sitting by himself.

Yes. Neville is safe and judgment free.

I smile to myself and I take a seat beside him. He looks surprised for a moment and he knocks over his goblet of pumpkin juice.

"H-Hey, Ginny," he stutters out in surprise and I smile at him.

"How's it going?" I ask as I grab a roll from the table. I am famished and I break it apart with my fingers while good old Neville answers.

"I'm doing fairly well," he says with red cheeks. "Are you doing well?"

I look at him and give him a kind smile. I really like Neville, he is a non-threatening stand up bloke in my book. "I am very well."

"That's good," he says with a head nod as he looks away.

I ask him about his summer and we start talking about our holidays. He worked at some well known green house that past couple of months and he became a botanist's apprentice. He's always been good with plants and I'm glad that he's found his niche... My take on the summer holiday was more watered down, of course. I told him I worked at a country club and that I went swimming sometimes... that was about it. It made me sound impossibly boring, but I didn't feel like divulging my love life to him. I wondered, then, if I looked different to him after all the big changes I've been through recently.

I always knew Neville had some type of feelings for me. He had asked me out on many awkward occasions, but I always turned him town as easily as I could. He was a good friend and that's all I would ever see him as. There were times when I wished I did like him that way. He's the sweetest guy ever and he'll do anything for you. He'll make some girl very happy someday...

"I feel like Draco Malfoy is trying to set me on fire," he says nervously as he takes a drink from his glass. I furrow my brows and look towards the Slytherin table, but Neville snaps at me. "Don't look." he hisses but I shake my head and look anyways. "Why is he looking at me like that?" he whispers nervously as he fumbles around with his silverware.

I find where Draco is sitting and he is glaring daggers... not at Neville though, at me. I give him a puzzled look for it and he sneers before turning back to Blaise to say something snappish to him. I raise my brows and shrug it off.

"Draco is my boyfriend," I admit and I hear the gasp of surprise coming from the heavy boy at my side. "We started seeing each other over the summer."

I feel kind of embarrassed to look at him now, but I gather the courage and slowly make eye contact. Neville looks slightly hurt before it transforms into disgust.

"Why ever would you date a guy like him?" he spits out as he puts butter on his roll. "He is the worst person who's ever lived."

I snort. "I doubt that's true," I say and Neville makes a face.

"He really is terrible, Ginny. Why would you do something like that?" I don't answer because I'm starting to get angry and he sighs loudly. "Does Ron know? I bet he flipped a lid when he heard you were dating his worst enemy."

"I don't care about what Ron has to say, nor do I care about his infantile rivalry with Draco," I snap. "Let's talk about something else," I say because I really want to change the subject right about now and I still have that annoying headache.

"Okay, let's talk about how your _boyfriend_," he says the word with disgust and I make a face. "Keeps looking at me like he wants to kill me."

I look towards Draco again. He's still glaring at us and I shake my head before turning towards the noise coming from the hallway. All the little first years are being ushered into the room now and I smile as they pass by us to get sorted. Professor Sprout brings out the stool and the sorting hat starts singing some song about hope and unity, but I tune it out when I notice McGonagall's empty seat.

It saddens me so I look away, only to find Snape sitting in the headmaster's chair.

Oh, I forgot about that.

"What in the bloody hell do you think you're doing?" Ron's found me and he hisses in my ear before making the kid beside me scoot down.

"Ronald, honestly, this can wait until later," Hermione whispers. She's right behind him and the poor kid who was sitting beside me get's crammed down a little further.

"Not until you tell me what you're bloody doing with Draco Malfoy," he says.

I finally look at him. My brother is not the same boy who left the night before my birthday. He looks older somehow, more world worn, and there are dark circles under his bright blue eyes. I sigh tiredly and look down with a head shake.

"It's none of your business," I tell him but I know that won't settle this.

This is one of those fights that can explode into epic proportions. I can feel that stirring in my gut now.

"It's all my business!" he yells and everyone looks at him as the sorting hat continues to sing. Hermione gives him a face before he quiets himself down. "I need to know what my little sister is doing hanging around a snake like that."

I glare at him.

"If you were home at all this summer, you would know the answer to that question," I tell him in a low whisper. Most of the people around us aren't listening to the sorting anymore. They're all watching us.

"Don't pin this on me. Do you realize how stupid you're being," he says harshly and I clench my jaw shut and glare at my plate. "You can be a real idiot sometimes. What's this I hear about you and him dating? Are you actually dating him? Do you realize who he is... what he's done to me and Hermione... and the terrible things he's done to Harry? Do you realize his family is in league with you-know-who? Gosh, Ginny, I thought you would have smartened up by now."

"Shut up," I hiss at him in a low whisper. My wand hand is twitching. I want to curse him.

"Don't tell me to shut up," he says as he throws off Hemione's hand when she puts it on his arm. "What are you doing, Ginny? Are you doing this to get back at us for leaving?"

"Not everything is about you," I say harshly, but he shakes his head.

"I bet that's it. Well, I know how to put an end to this. Mom saw you on the platform. She didn't know you were dating him did she?"

"The worst she can do to me now is send me a howler," I state bitterly and his ears turn red in anger. "Now, go away. You're bothering me."

"Ronald, let's go. The first years are being sorted and they'll be serving food soon."

At the mention of food, my brother's eyes soften and he gives me one final glare. "This isn't over, Ginny. When we get to the common room I'm going to find out everything." '

"Whatever," I snap.

They go back to the end of the table where their original seats are I slump my shoulders.

"You okay?" Neville ask as the hufflepuffs clap when they get a new student.

I nod my head.

"You know your brother," he says with a wry smile. "He'll calm down soon," he says, placing his hand on mine.

It shocks me and I pull my hand out from underneath his.

"Sorry," he mutters as I massage my skin.

"It's alright," I say softly. "Just a little static."

Once everyone is sorted, I look over at the Slytherin table again. Draco is drinking from his goblet and he's in a very serious looking discussion with Zabini on his right. I sigh when the food arrives and take one bite before I realize that I'm not hungry. My brother had officially ruined my appetite. I gather my things and stand up so I can go back to my common room. If I get there early, I can hide in my room the rest of the night to avoid my stupid bother.

When I get to the doors, I look over my shoulder. Draco is watching me and when he makes eye contact he starts to get up, but I put my hand out and shake my head. He can't get into my common room anyways and I just want to be alone right now.

I take my time going to the tower, and I when I say the password to the fat lady she scolds me for leaving the feast early. I roll my eyes and walk into the common room once she opens up. I don't need to be chastised by a painting, thank you very much.

Harry is sitting by the fire, staring into flames... all by himself. I don't feel like talking to him either and I go to walk by him, but he stands up.

"Gin."

The way he says my name... I sigh loudly and stop walking.

"Yeah?" He doesn't say anything, he just stares at me and I become uncomfortable by it. "Are you okay?" I ask softly because he looks so... sad.

He shakes his head and sits down heavily on one of the chairs. I hesitate a moment before taking tentative steps towards him. He puts his head in his hands and sighs loudly as I approach.

"Harry?" I whisper when I'm standing right in front of him. He looks up at me, his green eyes are sparkling with sadness. I kneel in front of him and put my hands on his. "What's wrong?"

"Everything," he whispers as he looks over my face. "Ginny, I'm sorry," he says seriously.

I furrow my brows. "What are you sorry about?"

"I'm sorry about this summer, that we left with out telling you... that we missed your birthday," he says. "But... why him?"

"What?" I question softly and he forces his dark brows together.

"Why him, why Malfoy?"

I sit back on my heels and let my hands drop from his. "Are you going to yell at me like Ron?" I ask sharply with an eyebrow raised.

He shakes his head. "No, I just want to know why."

"Because he's sweet to me... and I like him," I admit honestly and Harry rubs his lips as he looks at me.

"Because he was there," he says flatly. I don't say anything to that and he cracks his neck and sits back in the chair.

"It's more than that," I whisper and he looks away.

"Dumbledore told me to come back to Hogwarts. That I would always be safe here," he says softly. "I don't feel safe anymore," he admits in a soft whisper. "Dumbledore was supposed to keep me informed until he returned, but I haven't heard from him in months. I fear he may be dead, Ginny," he says and when he looks at me again, I see his eyes watering.

Harry has lost everyone that was close to him and I suddenly feel very bad for him. I lean forward and wrap my arms around his neck to pull him to me in a tight hug. I had never touched him like this before and I nearly pulled away when he wrapped his arms around my back and buried his face in the crook of my neck. I think he's trying not to cry. I want to ask him what he's been doing all summer, where he's been and what he's found... but I can't bring myself to.

"I saw you at the Quidditch game," I whisper against his hair. "You ran from me."

"He's dangerous, Gin," he says, still clutching me. "They all are."

I pull back to look into his eyes and he brings his hand up to stroke my cheek. I freeze as his eyes study mine and when he starts leaning forward I take in a sharp breath.

He looks like he's going to kiss me.

Before his lips touch mine, a terrible feeling overtakes my body and my hands start burning. It feels like I'm on fire. I get propelled back by an unknown force and my back smacks against the floor.

"Are you okay?" Harry asks in a panic as he runs over to me. I pull myself up and push Harry's hand away when he tries to help. My skin still feels like it's on fire.

"I'm fine," I snap as I stand up and dust my uniform off. What in the hell was that? I look down at my right hand and I flex my fingers.

Draco.

I shake my head and run up to my room, ignoring Harry as he calls after me. When I get to my bed, I pull the curtains tightly around me as my body burns and my heart aches. I sit down, pulling my knees up to my chest after throwing off those stupid heels and I breath in and out deeply. What if Draco thought I cheated on him? Was that what the burning was about? Is that why I got sent backwards when Harry tried to...to do that thing he tried to do? I shake my head and make a noise in the back of my throat.

When the burning dulls to a manageable pain, I strip out of my clothes and put my pj's on as I look over my class schedule for tomorrow. My first class is potions with Slytherin and I make a face before laying back on the bed and glaring at the canopy. When my roommates file into the room, I ignore them and pretend I'm asleep as they gossip and giggle back and forth. I fall asleep listening to Romilda Vane talk about the boy she fell in love with over the summer as I try not to worry about what tomorrow is going to bring for me.

I get up earlier than my roommates so I can make it to the great hall before anyone else. I take a quick shower and do my hair in a loose braid as I try not to be nervous about my brother, and my classes... and my boyfriend. I'm hoping to talk to Draco first. If what happened last night was because of that stupid curse then I think I want to take it back. It's just ridiculous. My skin still feels slightly burnt, like a sun burn, and I'm surprised that my skin isn't red when I look into the mirror. I hesitated a moment before putting on Pansy's snake skin pumps and I gave myself one last once over in the mirror before heading out with my bag full of books over my shoulder.

I was going to go to the great hall and wait for Draco so we could talk. I didn't expect him to be standing right outside of the portrait hole, leaning against the stair banister with his arms crossed.

I pause for a second, just staring at him until he raises an eyebrow. "Good morning, sweetheart," he sneers sarcastically and I narrow my eyes.

"My skin still burns," I say sharply. It feels like I've been out in the sun for ten hours straight without any sunblock. "Was that because of that stupid oath thing?" I ask as I rub my arms, trying to get rid of the sting.

He looks me over coldly and then he raises his eyebrow. "What were you doing?" he asks slowly as he takes his hands out of his pockets.

"I was just talking to a friend," I snap angrily because this is stupid. He still stares at me so I shake my head. "And I gave him a hug. This shouldn't happen... I wasn't doing anything bad."

"It wouldn't have burned if you weren't," he says flatly, and then he starts walking towards me with calculated steps. "Look at me," he says seriously.

I clench my jaw and look up at him, he reaches out and puts his hand on the side of my face as he studies my eyes. Then I feel it, slightly at first and then more pronounced, as he digs into my mind. I clench my eyes shut as he pulls the memory and looks over it like he was reading a book. _I walk into the portrait hole, talk to Harry, hug him, get thrown back... _When he's done and he's satisfied, he pulls out and runs his knuckles over my face.

"You shouldn't have done that," I say with a tight throat as I blink rapidly, trying to focus on the real world. "You can't just go into my mind whenever you want."

"He was going to kiss you," he says softly. The burning stops and I let out a sigh to be relieved of the pain. "And I can do what I want, Ginny," he says sharply. "You're my girl and you didn't tell me to stop."

I guess there's some logic in that. He'd stop if I ask him to, right?

"It felt like I was on fire," I admit softly and he stares at me with dark eyes as I lean back and rub my temples. It still hurts from him digging in there.

"You didn't move away in time," he says flatly. "You were going to let him kiss you."

"No," I say as I shake my head because I don't want him to be mad at me. "I wasn't."

"Yes," he says flatly as he takes another step closer to me. "You were. It's funny that you can say that you love me when you allow yourself to get into situations like that? How am I supposed to trust you?"

"You can trust me," I say softly because now I actually feel bad. He was right about getting myself into a situation like that, I guess. "I wouldn't have let him kiss me. I don't even like him that way anymore."

"Anymore?" he asks coldly.

"This is stupid," I say in annoyance and he glares. "This is wrong. That stupid spell isn't normal and I shouldn't have agreed to it. I didn't do anything with Harry, but it burned me anyways and now you're all suspicious when you don't need to be."

"Shut up," he snaps and I widen my eyes in surprise. "You know you're in trouble and you're trying to weasel your way out of it. This is precisely why we did that oath because I knew something like this would happen. I just didn't think it would happen on our first fucking day of school."

Maybe he's right... I do feel terribly guilty. I put aside the injustice I feel over that stupid charm and I take a step closer to him.

"I love you, Draco," I say honestly. "That's the truth. I don't want to be with anyone else," I say as I reach out to lay my hand on his chest. "You don't have to read my mind or do any stupid spells to know that."

"Apparently I do," he says flatly and I bite my lip. After a few moments of glaring, he steps back and sighs, running a hand over his face. "I do not want to fight with you right now," he says.

"I agree," I mutter softly and he looks at me again, taking the bag from my shoulder.

"How bad was your brother last night?" he asks gently as he looks over my face. "I saw the way he was talking to you in the Great Hall."

I shrug and try not to think about it. "Angry as expected," I answer honestly. "I'm not looking forward to seeing him again."

"If you want to be in this relationship with me, you have to be brave, Ginny," he says as he takes my hand. "Do you think you can handle that?" I nod my head with my throat tight. "Let's go to breakfast," he says gently.

I take a seat beside him at the Slytherin table and we barely speak to one another. Eventually the tension becomes too much for me, so I put my hand on his leg under the table and kiss his cheek. He looks at me with eyebrows raised.

"I'm sorry," I admit in a soft voice. "You were right. I shouldn't have been in a situation like that and you have every right to be upset..." I trail off as he stares at me. "But you saw what happened," I tell him seriously. "I didn't initiate anything, you have nothing to worry about."

"I know I have nothing to worry about," he says darkly and I look at his chest. "Will you do me a favor?" he asks as he takes a drink from his glass. I nod my head. "Don't speak to him again."

I scoff. "I just can't stop speaking to him, Draco. He's my brother's best friend and we're in the same house. It will be hard not to talk to him when we're on the same team." I admit as I think about Quidditch this year.

"He wants you," he says seriously with his cold eyes raking in my reaction. I scoff again and shake my head. "He does and he can't have you. I refuse," he says and a chill goes down my spine at the way he said it.

His voice sounded so sure and so full of authority that it was almost frightening.

"I will sleep better knowing you're not on speaking terms with him, but knowing that's a selfish demand, will you at least honor my request to not speak to him in private like you did last night? I obviously can't trust him around you. He tried to make a pass at you despite already knowing we were dating. I can't have that."

He puts his hand on mine underneath the table and squeezes gently.

"No more private meetings with Potter, yes? That is fair, is it not?"

"Yes," I sigh softly. "I suppose that is fair."

"Good," he says with a smirk turning the corner of his mouth and then he kisses me. "I'm glad that it's settled."

I feel a bit uncomfortable with that settlement and I pick at my toast as the great hall fills up with people getting ready for the first day of school. Pansy comes in with Daphne and Millicent flanked on either side of her and they take a seat across from us as I glare down at my plate. I don't know why I feel so funny about this whole thing. I guess because a part of me knows it's wrong. I look at Draco's profile as he eats his eggs and I sigh when my heart warms over. Loving someone is complicated.

He notices me staring at him and his silver eyes slide to mine. I give him a nervous smile and leans over and kisses my cheek softly.

Luckily, my brother and his two friends do not show up for breakfast and a part of me is grateful for that. "I'll walk you to class," Draco says as he takes my hand and helps me out of my seat. I used to hate it when Dean would do stuff like that when we were dating, but I guess I just don't mind so much when Draco does it.

I allow myself to get pulled down the hallways towards the dungeons where Slughorn's classroom is. For whatever reason, Blaise decided to walk with us as well and he and Draco were in a deep discussion about some kind of spell I didn't understand as Draco kept his hand firmly on my back. "We'll talk about it later," Draco ends up snapping at his friend before we walk down the stairs towards the classroom, leaving Zabini in the hall.

"What was that all about?" I ask as his possessive hand stays on my back.

"Nothing," he says flatly and I give him a look but don't press the matter. A few kids are already waiting outside of the classroom and I give the few from my house a shy smile before Draco steps in front of me, blocking my path. "I'll see you at lunch," he says and I nod my head and look away. "Ginny," he says softly until I look at him. "Kiss?" is all he says and I give in and lean up, leaving a kiss against his lips.

He smiles when I pull back and runs his hand up my arm before looking at someone over my shoulder.

"Sit by her," is all he says before leaving. When he's gone, I look over my shoulder and see Ivy Parkinson and the other Slytherins from my grade all eyeing me critically.

I sigh loudly before walking into the classroom. I don't want to sit by them. Draco doesn't control everything I do and, with that thought in mind, I walk towards the front of the class and put my bag down by Colin Creevey who gives me a large and confused grin.

"Hey Gin!" he says happily as I take a seat and cross my arms.

I hear Ivy huff as she sits beside me and I turn more towards Colin. "What are you doing, Weasley?" She whispers fiercely as she pulls my arm until I'm looking at her. "You heard what he said. You have to sit by us."

"You are sitting by me," I say as I take out my notebook and quill.

"You know what he meant," she hisses as she glances at Colin who is shuffling through papers in a folder of his. "He won't like this."

"You know what," I say as I give her my full attention. "We don't like each other, we never have... Why are you all over me all of a sudden?"

"You know what he said," she says slowly like I was stupid and I scoff.

"I don't do everything Draco Malfoy says, thank you very much," I say as I think about what happened this morning and I bristle in annoyance.

Ivy doesn't say anything and when I glance at her she's giving me a look that I'm altogether uncomfortable receiving from someone who I don't like... She's not glaring, or scoffing, or smirking mockingly like I'm used to...

She's looking at me with sympathy... sympathy and _pity_ and when she gets her bag and stands up to take her seat with the other slytherins at the back of the classroom I swallow a large uncomfortable lump that had gotten stuck in my throat.

That one look from a known enemy has worried me more than anything in my entire life.


	9. Chapter 9

"What was it like?"

"What was what like?" I ask as I move some hair out of my face. It is too damn hot in this greenhouse. Sprout needs a cold air charm in here or something because I'm starting to sweat.

I _hate_ sweating.

"Making love," Luna says softly and I glance around quickly to see if anyone heard her say that.

We're in herbology, digging through some dirt to find a certain kind of root that Sprout said we needed for our lesson. I grabbed Luna right away and made her sit with me so we could talk about things. I haven't seen her since the summer holiday but all she wants to talk about is Theo, and sex, and having sex with Theo. It's all very tiresome and I'm not in a good mood anyways. I missed lunch because I had seen Draco speaking with Cho right before I went into the Great Hall and it made me lose my appetite. I have no idea what they were talking about, but my stomach feels like it's going to start eating itself soon if I don't get some food in there.

"It was... different," I admit in a whisper once I'm sure the other Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs aren't listening.

"Did it feel good?" she asks, not even bothering to keep her voice down and I blush as I pick up a large chunk of dirt with my gloved hands. I plop it down on the table and my stomach growls loudly. I cover it with a cough and continue with the dirt removal. I don't answer right away, so she asks louder. "Ginny, did it feel good?"

"Yes," I say quickly so she won't ask again. I look at her quickly and she blinks her large eyes at me. She told me she wanted to start 'making love' with Theo, so I guess she's trying to figure out what to expect, just like I had quizzed Daphne and Pansy before I slept with Draco. "I mean... it was kind of uncomfortable at first," I say honestly as I remember the initial pain of having Draco in me for the first time. "But, you know, Draco was very sweet to me and it ended up feeling really nice."

She sighs wistfully and I furrow my brows. "Is it romantic to make love?"

The way she says 'make love' makes me want to vomit, to be completely honest. "I don't know," I say as I focus on my pot of dirt. I don't want to talk about my sex life anymore. It makes me feel uncomfortable and anyone could hear her because she doesn't bother to whisper. She doesn't exactly have the best social skills.

"How do you not know?" she asks. I find the root Sprout wanted and I pull it out, thankful for the distraction.

"I found it," I say as I hold it up to get a better look. "It looks kind of like a prune, doesn't it?"

"Ginny," Luna says. She found her root too and she's following me to my desk. "How can you not know? Is making love romantic or not?"

"I guess it is," I say just so she'll stop talking about it. "I guess it depends on the couple," I say as I take my seat and put my root on the desk in front of me. I wouldn't exactly call it romantic, I just liked being close to him. "Let's talk about something else," I say as she sits at the desk beside me.

"I think I'm going to make love to Theo soon."

I sigh and put my head in my hands. "You said that before," I remind her as I glare at my desk. I don't want to talk about her creepy boyfriend anymore.

"When you did it," she says and I shake my head in annoyance. "Did you let him finish in you, or did you make him go in a cup?"

I look at her. Did she really just say that? "What?" I say flatly and she furrows her brows.

"When Theo and I fool around, he always finds like a cup or something to finish in."

I make a disgusted face. I do not want to hear about her creepy boyfriend jizzing into cups.

"Did you let Draco actually finish in you?"

"I don't want to talk about this anymore," I say uncomfortably because she is getting way too personal.

"If you let him finish," she starts as the other kids start to sit at the desks as well. "How do you know you're not pregnant."

"There are potions you can take," I hiss at her and I look behind me again to make sure other people aren't listening to this ridiculous conversation. I don't need the whole school thinking I could possibly be pregnant. "Now, this isn't appropriate to speak of anymore," I tell her gently.

She nods her head like she understands, but she keeps talking anyways. "Has Draco ever asked you to drink a polyjuice potion..."

"Luna," I snap, leveling her with a glare. I put my hand up when she opens her mouth to respond. "I don't want to talk about this anymore."

"Fine," she says as she sits back and crosses her arms in a pout. "I was just trying to talk to you."

I roll my eyes and look at Sprout as she walks to the front of the room to give her lecture about the root we had to dig up. Double Herbology is going to be my least favorite subject I think and it's on a Wednesday... Wednesdays are my longest days in class. I take notes diligently and ignore Luna's glare until the bell rings. I pack up my notebook and quill and put my root in one of the class room containers to preserve it until next time as Luna stays impossibly close to me. When we finally leave the green house, she's so close, our arms are touching and she's making me veer to the right.

"Luna, what are you doing?" I say with a sigh because she's walking right into me, but not saying a word.

"Just walking. Am I allowed to do that?" she asks sharply and I glare at her as I hike my bag up a little further. "Since you don't want me to talk to you."

"It's not that I don't want to talk to you," I tell her tightly. "I just don't want to talk about how your boyfriend puts his semen into cups."

"Friends talk about everything, Ginny," she says like I was being foolish. "Everything."

"Not when everyone else can hear," I say seriously. "I will be more than happy to-" I don't finish that sentence, because before I can get it all out, she gasps and starts running towards Theodore Nott, who's standing by the stairs of the castle.

I watch her hair shimmer in the sun as she runs towards him and I make an angry face at her retreating back.

Friends talk about everything. What a joke.

Hmf.

I walk by myself all the way to the castle and I glare down at my feet as I stomp up the stairs and follow the hallways towards the Great Hall. I'm grateful it's dinner time because my stomach is starting to hurt. I try to shake off how annoying Luna is being. She never was like it before and I completely and utterly blame freaking Theodore Nott and his stupid weedy looking face. I scowl at the thought of him. I need to find Luna someone else... someone who's nice and sweet and not a perverted creep. When I see Draco standing at the top to the stairs, my bad mood vanishes, and I find a smile turning my face as he puts his hands in his pressed slacks.

"Hey," I say gently as I get closer to him. I resist running because I don't want to be like Luna.

"How was Herbology?" he asks as he takes my bag off of my shoulders. I love that I never have to carry anything around him. He makes me feel like a lady.

I shrug. "It was alright," I say, trying to keep my irritated thoughts about Luna at bay. "It's not my favorite class," I admit and he smiles as he kisses my head.

"It's important though," he says as he takes my hand.

He says that about every class. He's such a nerd about school work.

"I'm starving," I say as I put my hand on my empty stomach. "Dinner couldn't come soon enough." He nods his head, but pulls me to the right as soon as we reach the Great Hall doors. "What are you doing?" I ask as I look back at the doors longingly. "I just said how hungry I was."

"You can eat in a minute. I want to talk to you," he says, stopping when we're away from the dinner crowd and facing me full on.

"Okay..." I say nervously. I find that 'talks' never turn our very well in relationships. "What is this about?"

"Why didn't you want to sit with Ivy Parkinson in potions on Monday?" he asks and when I realize what he's talking about, I almost laugh. "And I was also told that you didn't sit with them this morning when you had defense class."

"Are you serious?" I say as I relax my body. I thought it was something serious.

"Yes, I'm serious. I wanted you to sit with them."

"Why do I have to sit by them? I don't even like them."

"Because I said so," he says bitterly, like that made sense. I narrow my eyes, glaring right at his silver head boy badge. "Relationships are about compromises, Gin. I'm telling you I would prefer that you sit with Ivy and the rest of the people from my house when you're in classes with them. I expect you to do as I say because you love me."

That sentence made me uneasy and I bite my lower lip as I try to think it through. I do love Draco... I love him so much but sometimes when he speaks I get a very manipulative vibe from him. Like right now for instance. I doubt he even realizes it, but sometimes he falls into one of the worst categories a boyfriend can fall into: _Controlling_.

"But that doesn't make any sense," I say as I lean against the wall, trying to make him see sense. He props his hand up by my head as he towers over me. "I'm not friends with any of them."

"Who are you friends with?" he counters and I purse my lips.

"Does it matter?"I say and I watch a group of students walk by us, headed towards the Great Hall, and I'm envious of every single one of them. I bet they're serving chicken tonight... I love grilled chicken. "I just don't want to have to sit with people I don't like just because my boyfriend says so," I say dryly as I look up at him. "It's not like it's a big deal or anything."

He clenches his fist against his wall. "Ginny," he says with a tight jaw. "I gave a very specific order," he says and I furrow my brows as I remember that very concerning look Ivy had given me in potions. "I expect everyone to listen to me, including you."

I shake my head. "I just don't understand why," I admit and he sighs as he relaxes his body.

"You don't need to understand. You said it was no big deal, so for my sanity, will you please just do as I say and sit with them next time?"

"What about when I have class with the Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs? Do you want me to find a random Slytherin in the hall and drag them to class with me so I won't be alone?"

"Don't get smart," he snaps and I roll my eyes.

A silence falls over us and I look away, glaring at the opposite wall with his breath is warm on my face. I still don't get why he wants me to sit with his freaking Slytherin people. There's no point.

"Why do they always do what you say?" I question as I flick a glance up to him. It has been something that had been bothering me for a while, actually. "All your friends just do what you say like their life depended on it."

"Maybe it does," he says softly and I furrow my brows before the corner of his mouth tilts up. "Joking, of course," he adds because I think I'm giving him a very troubled look. He sighs again. "People do as I say because I have authority and they respect that," he says and that doesn't make any sense either so I cross my arms. "You should do as I say because you're my girlfriend and you should want to please me."

"What about what pleases me?" I say stiffly and he raises one sharp eyebrow.

"That is always on the forefront of my mind, I assure you," he says with a sinful smile and I blush at what he's implying. "In fact," he says, taking a step closer so his body is almost touching mine. "I think I know something that will immensely please you, my love."

I duck under his arm and step away from the wall so I'm no longer trapped against it. "Don't manipulate me with your sexy talk," I say with a pout. "This is a serious discussion we're having." I cross my arms again. "Why do your friends always seem like it's the end of the word if they disobey you? Ivy looked at me like she thought you would do something terrible because I didn't sit with them and all your other friends are all 'Draco said this... please don't tell Draco that... Draco won't like this..." I sigh tiredly. "What is that all about?"

"Who says 'please don't tell Draco that'?" he asks with narrowed eyes and I open my mouth before snapping it shut.

He's avoiding my question.

"It doesn't matter, that's not what I asked."

"Ginny," he says flatly, taking a menacing step towards me. He has _that_ look in his eyes now, and I bite my lower lip. "Who said that and why did they say it?"

"Daphne practically begged me not to tell you when she was late one time meeting me at Folk Hills..." I trail off and clench my jaw as I think about it. "And about that... why did you have them babysit me all the time?" I put my hands on my hips. "This is all so confusing and Blaise said you were playing chess against someone and I was the queen and I have no bloody idea what's going on and I don't like it."

I stomp my foot at the end of my little rant and he smiles at me like I was a child doing something adorable.

"Don't laugh at me," I say with a frown. "I'm being serious."

"You don't have to be troubled about anything," he says with a ghost of a smile still on his lips as he takes a strand of my hair and twirls it around his finger. "All you have to worry about is making me happy."

I scoff and smack his hand away.

"Honestly, Draco, that isn't an answer and you know it."

"Listen," he says with a sigh as he puts his hand in his front pocket. "When I'm around everyone else

I am constantly on guard. I have to block my mind and watch what I say... I can't relax. I haven't relaxed since I was a child, but when I'm around you, I finally can."

He brings his hand up and touches my cheek.

"You have no agenda. You have no ambitious plan to use me for whatever reason," he shakes his head and lets his hand drop to neck. "You have no idea how it feels to just let go for a while," he says gently. He takes a step closer and puts his forehead against mine. "I don't want to lose that with you. I want to keep it simple."

I exhale slowly. Again, he didn't answer my freaking question.

"But why do you want me to be around your friends all the time?" I ask softly. His soft words and his feather light touches are winning me over, but I need to know the answer. I can't just keep letting him change the subject on me... right?

"Tell me who you would rather be with and I'll change my mind on the matter," he says seriously. I don't say anything right away because I don't have much of an answer. "No answer?" he says with a brow raised. "Colin Creevey, perhaps?" he says flatly and I roll my eyes.

"I don't even like him," I admit with a head shake. "He's annoying."

"Then why did you sit with him?"

I open my mouth and then snap it shut. I'm not the one who should be questioned here. "That's not the topic. I just want to know why it's such a big deal to you that I sit with your house."

"I want them to be your friends too," he says gently. "We come from different worlds, Ginny, and I want you to fit in."

I bring my hand up to his and hold it against my neck as I try to figure out if I can accept that answer. He studies my face for a few moments before tilting his head and kissing me softly.

"That is fair, isn't it?" he whispers against my lips. "That makes sense?" I nod my head and let him kiss me some more.

I figure that's as much of an answer that I'm going to get from him today and I resign myself to that fact as he continues to press his body against mine.

"Draco," I whisper as he pushes me firmly against the wall. "I saw you talking to Cho Chang today," I say seriously as I remember seeing them together before I met him for lunch. "What did she want?"

"What she always wants," he says adding a kiss to my jaw.

He doesn't say anything to that and I frown, pushing him back. "And what's that?" I ask sharply. "Please don't ignore this question. I've had enough of you avoiding the topic today."

"She's annoyed that I ended things with her so abruptly," he says nonchalantly as he goes in to kiss me again. "She has emotional issues after what happened to one of her last boyfriends and she wants to give it another go," he says with a scoff. "You have nothing to worry about," he adds. "She is no threat to you or your standing with me. I've firmly established my intentions with you and I find her fucking annoying."

"Oh," is all I say as I think of Chang.

Cedric Diggory had died when the Dark Lord came back. How did I forget that? Suddenly hating Cho was a bit harder, but I couldn't take her constantly bugging my boyfriend about getting back together. Especially when I think she's prettier than me and she fits in better with his friends.

"Draco," I say again to get his attention as he moves to my neck with his hand caging me against the wall. "I'll do as you say," I tell him and he pulls back to look at my face. "I'll sit with your stupid house mates if you promise to not talk to Cho again."

I see a dark smirk curl at the corner of his mouth and his silver eyes start shining.

"You were the one who wanted me to speak with her at Zabini's house over the summer."

"I know," I answer with a head nod as I put my hand on his chest to play with his tie. "But I don't want you speaking with her anymore. I do what you say and you do what I say, right? Relationships are about compromises?"

"Right," he says with a pleased smile. "What a little negotiator you are."

"It's a deal then?" I ask softly and he nods my head, putting his fingers on my chin to tilt my head up.

"It's a deal," he says in a deep voice before leaning down to kiss me.

"You're in a hallway!"

I push Draco back with alarm and widen my eyes at my brother. He's standing right behind us, looking murderous with his ears tinted pink, clashing horribly with his hair.

"You're snogging Draco blooding Malfoy in a freaking hallway where anyone can see you! Have you no shame!" he screeches, looking at me like he had never seen me before. Harry is beside him, looking decidedly uncomfortable, but when his eyes slide to Draco, he glares.

"It's none of your business," I retort, a little shaken because I wasn't expecting this confrontation right now.

I've been successfully avoiding my brother and his friends for the past week and I suspect Hermione has kept my brother under wraps from doing anything rash because this is the first time he's addressed me like this after his scolding in the Great Hall the first night. My mother has also sent me a few howlers, but Draco had set them on fire before they even opened, which I was immensely grateful for. Everyone from my life before my current boyfriend seems to be disgusted with me, but Ron especially hates me now. I know Ron and Draco have gotten into a few fights when they were in classes together, but nothing too serious...

This morning was pretty terrible, though. I guess Ron had cursed Draco during their care of magical creatures class and I almost killed him when I heard.

"It's all my business," he says as he takes out his wand. Draco pushes me behind him and brandishes his own from his pocket. "You're acting like a... like a..." he searches around for a terrible word to call me before settling on one of the worst. "Like a slag."

"Ron," Harry scolds sharply, but Draco raises his wand.

"Don't speak to her like that," Draco says in a deadly voice and Ron sneers.

"She's my sister, Malfoy. I don't know what you're playing at, but I know you're taking advantage of her. I know what you are, Malfoy."

"Ron," I narrow my eyes and take out my own wand. "I'm not an idiot."

"You're with him, so I wouldn't doubt it."

"That's enough," Draco says with a menacing growl in his voice. "I have been more than patient with you, Weasley," he hisses the name and I furrow my brows. The hatred that dripped from his voice when he said it makes me uncomfortable because it's my last name too. "One more word and I'll blast you across the room."

"I'd like to see you try," Ron says and then he shoots a curse.

I push Draco aside and deflect the curse with my wand. It hits a nearby statue and makes it shake. The fury I feel right now is dangerous. "Ronald Weasley, how dare you," I say in deadly whisper as I lift my wand right at his chest. I can't believe he would curse us! "How dare you try to curse us!"

"His father is a Death Eater, Ginny," he says narrowly, his eyes sliding to Draco. "We saw him and we saw you," he says glaring at my boyfriend. "We know what you are."

I want to ask him more on that, but my anger won't let me. "Shut up, Ron," I hiss when he lifts his wand again. Draco scoffs at the wand pointed at his chest like it was insulting him. I look at Harry. "Please make him go away," I say in a pleading voice as I lower my own wand. I don't want to fight. "Harry?" I say softly to get his attention.

Harry looks at me with his eyes puzzled but when he looks at my boyfriend, they harden.

"Having a girl fight your battles now?" Harry asks coldly, looking at Draco with narrowed emerald eyes.

"At least I have a girl who likes me enough to want to protect me," Draco says flatly, his eyes leveled at Harry. "The last girl who loved you was probably your mother and she's dead."

I flick a disappointed glance at Draco. "Why would you say that?" I whisper because it's a low blow, but Harry raises his wand and shoots a curse right at Draco's chest.

Harry's getting emotional and he cheeks turn red as Draco easily deflects his curse and then lifts his wand to shoot a rather terrible curse right back. I step in between them to stop the duel, and I turn towards Draco with my hand on his until he lowers his wand. He clenches his jaw and tries to resist snapping at me as I shake my head.

"Please no," I say softly to appeal to his more sensitive side... if he has one. I know Draco could do some damage because he would do things Harry could never even think of. "Let's not do this."

He looks at me for a few angry moments before glancing over my shoulder. "I'm walking away before I change my mind and kill you," he says to them before turning on his heels. He looks at me over his shoulder when he realizes I'm not following. "Ginny," he snaps harshly and I put my wand in my bag with an uncomfortable unease in my stomach as he puts out his hand. "Come with me."

I look at my brother, he's practically seething, and when I remember hearing about the curse he hit Draco with this morning, I make up my mind. I sigh before taking Draco's hand.

"Ginny, bloody hell," Ron sneers in disgust as Draco pulls me down the hallway. He takes a few steps towards us as Draco looks steadily ahead of him with a tick in his jaw. "You're going with him after what he just said to Harry? Where is your loyalty?"

I look over my shoulder and give my brother an evil glare. I stop walking. "Loyalty?" I snap hatefully as I think of all the conversations I was butted out of, all the secrets that were kept from me, all the times I was left in the dust because of him and his stupid friends. "Don't talk to me about loyalty, Ron."

He curls back his lip in anger, but before he can retort, Draco pulls me away with a firm jerk. I shake out of it and realize that Draco's pulling me towards the Great Hall with swift and steady steps. Before we get to the doors, Draco stops us and pushes me into an alcove with his lips crashing against mine almost painfully.

I barely even get out a muffled 'what' before he forces my legs apart with his knee and he pins me against the wall.

"What are you doing?" I whisper once he pulls back to give me time to breathe.

He looks at me with dark eyes before bringing a hand up to my breast. Anyone could see us right now and I try to pull him away, but he's stronger than me.

"Draco..." I whisper to get his attention. He kisses me again, successfully silencing me.

"My Ginny," he whispers against my ear. It sends a pleasurable chill down my spine and my body starts to tingle. He runs his lips over my neck and cheek, finally settling on my lips. "My sweet little Ginny."

Jesus Christ.

I suppress a moan and furrow my brows as I start moving against his leg. I'm getting really turned on and when I go to un-tuck his shirt, he pulls back.

"Why did you stop?" I ask like a pathetic thing and he smirks before kissing my forehead.

"You were late meeting me last night," he says and I make a face. I was barely five minutes late meeting him by the library yesterday but he acted like it was the end of the word. "If I leave you wanting, you won't keep me waiting," he says with a smug smile and I cross my legs because I'm now uncomfortably wet.

"You're kind of a jerk sometimes," I tell him shortly and he snorts.

"I love you, Ginny," he says, kissing me briefly before pulling back. "I'll meet you in the library at eight on the dot, right?" he says, eyeing me like he was expecting me to agree and never be late again.

I right my uniform and glare at him. "You're not coming to dinner?" I ask and I have to stop myself from hitting him or saying something hateful. It is very rude to get someone that worked up only to pull away at the last second. I doubt he would like it if I did it to him.

"No," he says shortly. "I have something to take care of."

We walk out of the hidden alcove, and before he walks the opposite way, I grab his hand.

"Wait," I say worriedly. "You're not going to do anything to my brother or Harry are you?" I ask uncomfortably. I saw how mad Draco was during that fight and I figure he's itching to use his wand against them with out me there to stop him.

He scoffs.

"I have more important things to worry about than Potter and his boyfriend, thank you. Go eat. I'll see you later."

"Bye," I say weakly as he walks off.

Pansy catches me before I can sit anywhere else, and with a heavy sigh I take a seat at the Slytherin table surrounded by Draco's stupid friends. Daphne's chattering on about some stupid magazine article she read and Millicent is sitting across from me, pretending like I don't exist. I sigh as I put my chin in my hand and eat my food.

I was right. It is grilled chicken night.

No one worth while is in the hall right now and my eyes scan the tables until I land on Neville who is reading some kind of large text that has green pages. He looks up and smiles at me. I smile back and then my eyes find Luna's head of blond hair sitting at the end of the Slytherin table with Theodore Nott. I scowl at them and look back at Neville.

An idea hits me.

Neville and Luna would make a lovely couple.

Hm...

"Draco isn't coming to dinner tonight?" Pansy asks as I think of multiple ways to get Luna away from Theo the weird-o and with sweet, harmless Neville. I bet Neville would never jizz into a cup.

"No," I shake my head and finally look at her. She has her hair done up in a short pony tail with a sparkling headband that is clearly for show because it's not holding back any hair. "He said he had something to do." I shrug my shoulders and use my fork to pick up part of my roasted potato. I take a bite as I study Neville with a curious tilt of my head.

I wonder if he would date Luna...

"Did he tell you what he was doing?," she asks with an irritable sigh as she reads this mornings daily prophet over her chicken and broccoli.

"Nope," I tell her. Focusing on Luna and Neville's future relationship helps me ignore what happened in the hallway with Ron and Harry.

She shakes her head like she was annoyed with me and then she turns the page of the prophet with her eyes narrowed. "You know, you could have told me."

"Told you what?" I question. I push around my chicken and I try to ignore the way my mind is wondering towards my brother.

He's one step away from disowning me, I think. I know I need to talk to him just one on one. He has a lot to say to me and judging by the daily howlers I'm getting from my mother, I suspect she does as well. I wonder if I can get Ron calm enough to have a serious, rational conversation about Draco...

I think his face as been in a permanent sneer since school started, if I was being completely honest.

"That you and Draco are having sex."

I nearly choke on my pumpkin juice. "What?"

"Daphne told me," she says with narrowed eyes. I pick up my napkin and clean up the spill caused by my surprise. "Tara told her and her little sister told Tara that you were talking to Luna Lovegood about it in Herbology."

Jesus Christ news travels fast around here.

I feel my cheeks flush in embarrassment as I turn back to my plate. I suppose someone did hear us in Herbology and that makes me feel dirty.

"Why didn't you tell me?" she snaps and I inhale a shaky breath as I look around the room. Lavender Brown makes eye contact with me and I look away quickly with a blush staining my cheeks. Does she know too? How many other people know that Draco and I do it? How fast does information like that travel?

"It was personal," I whisper as I bring my hand up to my face to cover my reaction. I feel like everyone in the freaking room is staring at me right now. "I didn't want everyone knowing."

Oh, my god. I widen my eyes. What if my brother finds out?

I feel like slumping under the table and hiding for the duration of the school year.

"Why not?" she says flatly as she folds the paper over and lays it on the table.

"I don't want people thinking I'm easy..."

I am very close to having a panic attack and I lick my lips nervously before chewing on my nails. What if someone saw me practically humping him in the hallway? Ugh! People are going to think terrible terrible things about me now.

"Do you think I'm easy?" she asks sharply. I shake my head and furrow my brows because she isn't being very understanding about this whole thing. My eyes flick to the Ravenclaw table where Cho Chang is. Does she know too? "Do you think I'm a slut just because I have sex?"

"No, of course not... but... it just feels weird having people know we do that..." I trail off awkwardly and she raises an eyebrow.

"It's not weird to get fucked by your boyfriend," she says as she takes a drink from her water glass. I give her a scandalous look for her crude wording and she levels me with a glare. "You're fucking, Ginny. And it's not 'making love' like that looney lovegood freak keeps saying. Draco is fucking you and you're letting him. Stop acting like a little girl about it."

I blush again and look away, feeling slightly hurt by how sharp and unfeeling she's being towards me. I wish Draco was sitting with me right now. He usually makes me feel better. "Why are you being so mean to me?" I whisper softly as I start chewing on my nails again.

She sighs loudly and then she flicks her dark eyes to the end of the table. I see Blaise down there, flirting with a pretty Slytherin girl who's a year younger than me. He's working a toothpick in between his teeth and I suspect it's because he can't smoke as freely in the castle.

"I'm sorry," she spits out as she cracks her neck. When she looks at me again, her eyes soften the slightest bit. "I've been in a bad mood all day. I find that I hate the male sex at this particular moment," she says flatly as her eyes flick to Blaise again and then back to me. I'm still chewing on my nails, and she takes my hand, pulling it away from my mouth. It is a bad habit, I guess. "But I shouldn't take that out of you because you're here."

I nod my head in understanding and exhale slowly as I go back to my meal.

"So..." she starts after a few moments of awkward silence. "Did you like it?" I nervously nod my head and she smiles as she pats my back. Her sour mood seems to be shifting into a more light hearted area. "It got better after the first time, just like I told you it would, didn't it?"

"Yeah," I say. I clear my throat and look at her. Pansy is a girl... I need girl talk right now that doesn't consist of my gossipy roommates or a spaced out Luna. I think of the talk I had with Draco in the hallway and the way he worked me up just to pull away so I wouldn't be late meeting him tonight. "Sometimes..." I start and her sharp eyes look at me. "Sometimes I feel like he has a lot of control over what I do," I admit in a soft and worried voice. "He seems to have a lot of control over everyone."

"Draco has a lot of influence in our group," she says seriously. "He's smart and rich and handsome. That's all there is to it. If you don't want to do something, get a back bone and don't do it. Don't blame him if he convinces you otherwise."

Right.

Something still feels off about this whole thing... That look Ivy had given me can not be ignored... or the things Daphne had said to me... even Blaise...

I put my chin in my hands and grumpily eat the rest of my food as Pansy turns to talk to the girl on the other side of her. She wasn't any help at all. The news paper lays folded on the table and I pick it up to look it over.

_Bodies found in the Department of Mysteries_

I bite my lip as I skim the head line article.

…_.The bodies of three ministry employees were found Tuesday morning in the highly secretive science wing at the Ministry of Magic. Scientists were allegedly developing a spell that would control and contain the effects of the Fiend Fyre curse..._

I think of Draco's Prometheus project and I frown.

_...The victims had been there for weeks based on the state of decomposition of the bodies. Aurors say that it had taken so long to find them because of the secrecy surrounding the project... _

…_...The formulas the group were working on were not found at the scene and all their findings seem to have been destroyed... _

I put the paper down.

Does that have anything to do with Draco? I start chewing on my nails. Of course, Draco wouldn't kill anyone, but it has to be more than a coincidence that they were working on Fiend Fyre as well as Draco... but he said he developed it himself. Of course, it is a little far fetched that a wizard his age could control it and develop the spell himself... but he did... I saw it... and Draco did have an internship at the ministry this summer...

My head starts hurting as I try to put I all together.

Something catches the corner of my eyes and I divert my attention to the end of the slytherin table. I see Zabini smirk at the pretty blond girl and then he gets up.

Blaise.

He might be the person to talk to.

I grab my bag and stand up. "I'm going to go meet Draco," I lie. I keep my eyes on Zabini as he leaves the Great Hall. I speed walk to catch up to him, and I keep my distance so he doesn't realize he's being followed. He puts his hands in his black slacks as he jogs down the stairs and I try to be quiet as I step behind him, following him all the way to the owlery.

Most of the owls are sleeping on the perches and I stay back by the stairs as Blaise walks over to one of the windows and takes a cigarette from his pocket. I watch him with a furrowed brow as he throws his toothpick out the window and he lights the end of his fag with his wand.

I hear footsteps behind me, and I panic because I don't want someone to see me in the owlery with Zabini while he smokes. It could be a prefect! I hide behind a statue, but I scowl when I see lanky Theodore Nott walk past.

He approaches Zabini and I crane my neck to see them from my hiding spot.

"Nott," Zabini greets with out even looking away from the window. "To what do I owe this pleasure?"

"You have to talk to Draco for me," Theo the creep says as he glares at Zabini's back. "He's been ignoring me."

"He does that," Blaise says without a care as he turns slightly to see Nott from his peripheral.

"Tell him I don't want to do this anymore," he says and I furrow my brows even more. "Tell him I'm tired of it. She's weird and I can't do it anymore."

"You act like you have such a hard job," Zabini rolls his eyes and I narrow mine. What is he talking about? She's weird? He better not be talking about Luna.

"I don't want to do it anymore," Theo says finally. "Tell him I said that," he says sharply before turning on his heels and walking back out. Zabini shrugs and flicks his ashes out of the window.

"You can come out now," he says and I bite my lip. "You have red hair, Weasley. It doesn't exactly blend in with the shadows there."

Fuck.

I try not to blush as I step out of my hiding spot and I try to look dignified as I step into the owlery, closer to Zabini.

"Why are you spying on me?" he says as he looks down at his cigarette and then he glances out the window.

"I'm not spying," I admit, embarrassed that he caught me. "I just wanted to talk to you."

"About Draco?" he asks as he looks at me. I don't answer and he shakes his head with a bitter smile on his face. "I'm sorry, but do I have a fucking sign on my head that lets people know I'm the Draco Malfoy complaint department?"

I can't think up a response to that, so I ignore it.

"I just thought you could help me sort some things out, Blaise," I say seriously and he raises his eyebrows.

"It's _Blaise_ now?" he says sarcastically as I cross my arms uncomfortably. "Well, since we're on a first name basis, I guess we truly are friends now. What would you like to know, _Ginevra?_"

Ugh, he made my name sound terrible.

"Was Theo talking about Luna?" I ask worriedly as I point to the archway where Theo had left. An owl hoots up above, but I ignore it.

"I thought you wanted to talk about Draco," he adds dryly as he flicks more ashes out the window.

"You aren't allowed to smoke on school grounds," I point out because I'm not exactly sure how to word what I want to say to him.

"I didn't realize you had more authority over me," he says as he taps his prefect badge.

I inhale an angry breath and I stare at him for a few moments before trying once more. "Who is Draco playing against?" I ask and he squints. I take a step closer. "You said that Draco was playing against someone at your party over the summer. Do you remember?" I ask and he narrows his eyes.

"I don't remember telling you anything," he lies and my temper inflames.

"Blaise," I hiss. "You set up a whole little chess board with your cigarettes and everything. You said I was the queen."

"Oh, that," he says flatly as he blows smoke from the corner of his mouth. "It was nothing."

"But..."

"Is there anything else you would like to say to me?" he asks as he throws the cigarette out the window with a flick of his fingers.

"Yes," I say with my hands on my hips as I think about that prophet article. "Do you know anything about Draco's Prometh-"

"I'm going to stop you right here," he says with his hand up. "Before you get yourself any deeper, I would like you to know that I won't tell you anything. Though it's endearing that you think I would... I suggest you speak to your boyfriend about it."

He puts his hands on his pockets and starts to walk towards the archway, but I'm not done.

"Wait," I say as I run over to him and grab his arm.

He spins on me quickly and I nearly stumble back as he looks into my eyes with so much intensity that it almost hurts.

"Wait," I say softly once I get my bearings back and I take a step back from him and his menacing amber gaze. "You're his best friend... I thought you could help me understand a few things."

"Best friend," he scoffs and rolls his eyes. "Who do you think we are? Prepubescent girls?" He shakes his head and then he looks at me. "Listen, I like you and he really likes you. You're sweet and uncomplicated and I would suggest keeping it that way. You get to see a side to him that people rarely ever see and you should take advantage of it while he still lets you. He has a lot on his plate right now and all you have to do is keep it simple."

I open my mouth to retort, but he cuts me off.

"Now, are you going to tell him about this conversation, or am I?"

"What?" I say softly as he crosses his arms over his fit chest.

"He's going to find out anyways," he says as he studies my face. "I always find it's received better from one's own mouth."

I stare at him and he licks his teeth.

"I'll give you tonight to tell him yourself, but by morning I will have to let him know," he says seriously and I frown even deeper because this just adds to the puzzle. "I would just like to point out

that he stills gives you the benefit of the doubt. I don't get that from him anymore."

"What does that mean?" I say, more confused now than when I started this conversation.

He starts walking again "You are way too deep into this rabbit hole, Alice," he mutters as he stuffs his hands back into his pockets.

"What?" I say to his retreating back.

I watch him walk all the way back to the castle and with an annoyed turn to my feet, I follow angrily behind him.

No one is on my side in this. I realize that right now and I have an angry scowl on my face when I head towards the library to meet my boyfriend.

I glance at a clock as I walk down the hallway and when I see that it's ten past eight, I cuss and start running.

"You're late," Draco says as I scurry into the library with my heavy bag over my shoulder. He's already seated with a quill poised in his hand.

I sigh. "I guess your teasing method didn't work very well for you," I snap as I take a seat and I take out my books.

I pull out my quill and some parchment and open my transfiguration text so I can work on my assignment. All my thoughts turn towards that article, though, and I glance at Draco as he works through whatever homework he has in front of him. He's taken off his vest and loosened his tie, giving him a very laid back look. His silver eyes snap to mine and I look back down quickly. It has to be a coincidence, right? Blaise and Pansy have been no help to me... maybe Blaise was right. I should talk to Draco about it. We work for half an hour before he speaks again.

"Is there something you would like to say to me?"

I glance up and then quickly look away. "No, why do you ask?" I say softly as I twirl my quill around in my hand. It's close to curfew so the place is almost empty.

"It just seems like there is something on your mind," he says flatly and I shake my head before writing something down on the transfiguration essay I had been muddling through. I wouldn't even know how to bring up that article and I feel a bit guilty about talking to Blaise even though I know I shouldn't.

I can feel him staring at me and after a few moments, he grabs my essay. "Hey," I whisper fiercely as he picks up his quill and scans the parchment with his sharp eyes. After he reads it all, he shake his head and starts scratching things out with his quill.

I narrow my eyes.

"You can tell you didn't read the chapter," he says seriously as he uses his quill to edit the hell out of it. "Stupidity is one thing I can not tolerate and I know you are smarter than this."

My cheeks heat in embarrassment and I reach across the table to grab the essay back. "It's just a freaking rough draft," I hiss and he raises an eyebrow as I look at all the things he crossed out and corrected in that short amount of time. "I don't need a tutor."

"Apparently you do," he says flatly and I glare at him. "Make those corrections," he says, nodding to the parchment. "And take out that second paragraph. You have no need for it. You're just repeating what you said in the first one with different words. Quality over quantity, Gin."

"I don't want to do my homework with you if you are going to be this judgmental," I tell him as I start gathering up my school work to put in my bag. I'm ready to go to bed.

"I just want you to live up to your full potential in every subject," he says smugly and I shoot him a look before stuffing all my papers in my bag. "When you're finished with it, I would like to read it again," he says as he starts putting his things away as well. "Transfiguration is one of my best subjects."

I make a scoffing noise in the back of my throat and he shoots me a scolding look.

"You are being awfully serious today," I tell him with a frown and he leans back in his chair and crosses his arms.

"Yes," he says with a head nod. "I spent most of my morning in the infirmary nursing a stinging curse," he says and I suddenly feel bad because I know who did that to him. My brother "You know, it was very Slytherin of your brother to shoot a curse at me when my back was turned."

I bite my lip and slump a bit in my chair. "I'm sorry about him, Draco. I don't know what to do about it." I shake my head in anger when I think about what happened in the hallway with Ron and Harry. I was actually there for that one... I wonder what they say when I'm not around.

"You shouldn't be sorry about anything, but I will say that my patience is running thin. One of these days I am going to curse back and he will not enjoy it," he says and I nod my head in understanding. "There's only so much I can take."

"I know. Ron would deserve it, of course," I admit and he gives me a little smile before standing up.

I stand up as well and he takes my bag. As we leave the library, Draco takes my hand and when we walk past the stairs I need to take to my dorm, he tugs me back.

"Curfew is soon," I point out when we stop walking.

"You're coming to my room," he tells me without even asking. "I haven't touched you in a while and I wanted to start on your occulmency lessons."

"But I can't go into your room," I whisper. "Girls aren't allowed."

"Please," he scoffs as he starts pulling me in a different direction. "If Granger can figure out the counter to that charm to let your stupid brother in, then I am more than capable."

"Oh," is all I say. "Is her room close to yours?" I question and he nods.

"Right across the hall," he answers and he nods to a door on the other side of the hallway.

When we get to his room, I hesitate before stepping in and he gives me an amused look as he places my bag down on his bed.

"Don't be afraid," he says with a smile.

The door closes behind me and he smirks as he takes off his tie. "You can take a seat," he says nodding to a small writing desk along the wall. "I'm going to change," he says as he disappears through a dark door.

The room is of a modest size, full of his house colors and stone walls. There's a small loveseat under a rather large and curved window and candle holders curl out from the walls like snakes. I take off my shoes and loosen my tie as I look around me curiously. Draco's room is impossibly clean and his bed is impeccably made. My room never looks like this in the tower and I have to wonder if he tips the house elves or if he does it on his own. He's such a perfectionist that I'm pretty sure he does it himself like a weird-o.

"Would you like more casual clothes?" he asks as he comes out of a room that I'm going to assume is the bathroom. He's wearing a thin cotton t-shirt and a pair of black sweatpants that have his Quidditch number printed on the thigh.

"Uh, yeah, I guess," I say because if he's going to comfortable, I might as well be. He goes over to a set of drawers and digs trough it until he takes out a black V neck shirt and a pair of plaid boxers. He hands them to me and I start walking towards that maybe bathroom, but he blocks me.

"You can change out here," he says and I roll my eyes as I remember a conversation close to this at his Manor.

"You didn't," I point out and he smirks darkly at me.

"You know I like watching you," he says as he walks past me and takes a seat by his writing desk. "I haven't seen your body in a while. I would like to watch," he says as he sits back in the chair with his legs crossed. He's watching me expectantly, and then he raises an eyebrow. "Please?"

"What's in it for me?" I question softly with a smirk and he laughs.

"Well, what do you want?" he asks with a smile. I don't say anything as I try to think of something clever to say... but I'm not nearly as clever as he is. "You know I could give you anything, right?" he says, sounding a bit more serious. "All you have to do is ask."

"Could you give me an island?" I joke with a smile.

"If you play your cards right, I could get you three," he smirks and I laugh. A silence falls over us, and he cocks his head to the side. "I can't force you," he says nodding to the clothes in my hand. "But it would please me."

I don't want to disappoint him, actually, so I smile at him before dropping the bundle of clothes onto the bed. I take off the tie and I start unbuttoning my shirt. I can't be sexy about it, actually, I don't know how, so I nervously look down and push every button through the hole as quickly as I can. I shrug off the shirt quickly and then move to my skirt, with my hair falling in my face so I won't make direct eye contact with him. I let my skirt fall to my feet and I kick it to the side before awkwardly taking off my tank top, leaving me in my bra and panties... that do not match. I realize this a moment too late and I sigh at the cotton pink knickers and navy bra.

I just can't be effortlessly sexy, unfortunately.

Draco puts his fingers on my chin and I gasp in surprise as he tilts it up so I can look at him. I had no idea that he moved from the chair. He looks down at me with a warm look in his eyes and then he leans down and kisses me sweetly against the lips.

I sigh softly and kiss him back with my hands wrapped around his arms.

"You make me so happy, Ginny," he says and my heart flutters when he pulls back. I smile at him as he puts his hand on my neck and I place my hand over his. "You are perfect for me," he says as he runs his fingers of his right hand down my side, tickling the curve of my waist and hips.

I lean up and place a kiss against his neck, pressing my body against his because I like being close to him. "Alright," he says as he wraps his arms around me, pulling into a hug. "Get dressed and we'll get started."

"Okay," I say softly in a love stupor and when he steps back, I quickly put on his clothes. They're a bit too big for me, of course, but nothing too ridiculous.

"There are different layers to mind reading," he says as he takes a seat back by his writing desk.

There's no where else to sit but the bed to see him comfortably, so I sit with my legs crossed on the mattress as I watch him.

"That's one of the main things you have to understand. It's divided up into three different categories: Thoughts, fantasies, and memories. They always overlap and interrupt each other, so it takes a lot to actually go in and dig the truth out. If a thought is forefront in your mind... or an image.. then it will not be hard for a person to grab it. You wouldn't even feel it. Like, for instance, you thinking about reading that article while we were in the library," he says and I let my jaw drop.

"What?" I say softly even though I know perfectly well

"It is just a coincidence, Ginny," he says with a serious tilt of his face. "I don't want you to think about it anymore. This is why you need to learn this stuff. I can't have people listening in on you to find out my secrets."

"I'm sorry," I say quickly, even though I'm not sure if I should. "But, how did I not feel it?" I ask seriously. "I felt it the last time you were in my mind."

"The only time you feel it is when someone takes out a memory without lies. That's the hardest to shield."

"Like when you looked up that memory with Harry?" I ask softly and he nods his head.

"That always hurts," he says flatly. "That's why we need to teach you how to block your mind."

"Even from you?" I ask and raises an eyebrow.

"You'll never be able to block from me," he says seriously and I frown. "You feel too much for me," he admits. "Emotions always get in the way."

"That hardly seems fair," I mumble and he stands up with his wand in his hand.

"It's not," he admits as he takes my hand so I'm standing and he hands me my wand. "But you have nothing to hide now, do you?"

I think of my conversation with Blaise and how he said I needed to tell Draco before he did. I inhale deeply.

"Do you?" he repeats flatly and I tighten my jaw.

"I talked to Blaise before I met you in the library," I admit in a soft voice and he raises an eyebrow. "I thought I could talk to him about that article I read about the deaths at the Department of Mysteries. I almost asked him about your fiend fyre project."

"Why wouldn't you just ask me first?" he asks sharply and I shrug.

"I don't know," I admit. "I just... I don't know. I thought he could... I don't know," I repeat stupidly and he licks his lower lip.

"Will you let me see the conversation?" he asks as he takes a step closer to me.

"What?" I ask and he takes another step closer to me, putting his hand on my face and looking into my eyes.

I feel it again, that mind raping feeling that went through me when he was digging out that memory with Harry. He finds my conversation with Blaise in the Owlery and I clench my eyes shut as he watches it. It hurts and I nearly start crying. When he's done, and he pulls out, I open my eyes, noticing they're a bit wet from the intrusion.

"If you have questions, you come to me from now on," he says seriously as he runs his thumb over my lips. "Is that fair?"

I nod my head.

"Good, now, stand over there," he says, pointing to the opposite wall. I do as he says and I cross my arms.

He spends two hours giving me a tiring lesson on how to block my mind from intruders and when he's finished, I slowly crawl into his bed and rest against his pillows without a second thought as he curls up beside me. I'm exhausted and my brain hurts from him digging through it so viciously. He brought up every random memory I had. Kissing Dean for the first time, when my father taught me how to ride a bike, the first time Harry stayed at our house... Then he told me that if I start thinking of something out of nowhere, just a random thought that pops up, then I should shield myself because it's probably someone gently prodding my mind. I sigh when Draco puts his arm around me and I try to ignore the dull ache in my head as I drift off to sleep.

I awake to an alarm clock going off.

I crack an eye open and when I see what time it is, I groan.

"Why is it so early?" I snap groggily as Draco reaches over me to turn the alarm off.

"I have a meeting with the prefects," he says in a voice thick with sleep. He kisses my cheek. "You can go back to sleep for another hour or so," he says as he slides off the bed. "I have head boy duties," he says smugly.

"Glorified hall monitor," I mumble and he laughs.

I close my eyes again without a word as he makes his way to the bathroom and I huddle under the covers. His bed is much more comfortable than my dorm bed and I'm glad I get to sleep in it a bit longer. I hear a shower turn on somewhere and I cuddle more into the warmth of the bed as I try to drift back to sleep.

I fall asleep for all of ten minutes before I feel Draco's presence by me once more, sliding the covers back.

"I thought I had an hour to sleep in," I whine as he turns on the lights.

"You do," he says in a deep voice as he pulls the covers totally off of me. I scowl. "But I had some wicked thoughts while I was in the shower and since the source of my discomfort is willingly in my bed, I thought I'd take advantage of it this morning. "

"But I'm tired," I say with a yawn as I roll to my back and cover my eyes with my arm.

"And I'm hard," he says as he starts kissing my shoulder, and then he moves to my neck. "Only one of us can win this war... and I always win, so you do the math," he says as his hand slides in between my legs and he sucks on my ear.

I arch my back when his fingers slip under the hem line of his boxers and I finally open my eyes to look at him.

He smiles at me.

I narrow my eyes but I let him kiss me anyways.

"I'll have to deal with so many idiots today," he says. He pulls back and I lick my lips, looking at him as he stands up. He never got dressed after the shower, and he's just wearing a towel wrapped around his hips. He lets it drop and then he crawls into the bed beside me. "This will put me in a good mood."

I scoot over to give him room as he tugs on the shirt I'm wearing.

"Take this off," he says as he kisses my cheek.

I sigh loudly before doing as he says and removing the shirt. He starts snogging me again and his clever fingers reach around to my back to unhook my bra. It is so freaking early in the morning that I barely care what happens either way.

I hold back a yawn as I lift my hips to push down my knickers and boxers as Draco caresses me all over with his sinful left hand. After he's successfully worked me up and got me ready, he lays back and rolls me on top of him. I make a groaning noise into his mouth as we kiss and I try to get back on the bed, but he stops me.

"I'm tired too," he says with a smirk as he grabs me around the back of the knees so I'm straddling him. "Why don't you be a good girlfriend and let me relax," he says as I use his chest as leverage as I sit up.

He puts his hands behind his head and smirks at me. I become self conscience, so I go to cover my chest, but he stops me with his hands firmly around my wrists. "I would prefer to be on bottom," I mumble. I don't know how to move or how fast to go, and he's in a position where he can see absolutely everything and I haven't even brushed my teeth yet!

He shakes his head with a smile. "I'm tired of doing all the work," he says as he releases one of my wrists and he reaches down in between our bodies. "Come on, my love," he says and I glance at him for the tender way he's speaking to me. "Be sweet to me."

I lift myself up and settle my body on top of him, slowly lowering down until we're fully connected. I pause a second and close my eyes as I lay my hands on his chest. I feel him tuck some hair behind my ear and when I open my eyes, he's smiling at me.

"Move," is all he says and I bend down to kiss him as I start to rock against him.

I know I'm doing this wrong. I feel uncomfortable and everything is moving oddly. "Is this okay?" I ask nervously as I keep moving against him and he grabs my face and kisses me.

"You're doing fine, sweetheart. Just do what feels good."

"You always feel good," I admit in a soft whisper and he smiles at me. "I don't want to do this wrong."

"Just keep moving the way you are," he says as he puts his hands on my hips and he starts manipulating my movements with his strength. "Does that feel good?" he asks and I nod my head. He moves his hand down and rubs me... _there_... while I move. "Does that feel better?" he says with a smirk as I bite my bottom lip as I arch my back.

"Yeah..." I say in a breathless whisper because, oh my god, it does feel good.

"Good," is all he says as he watches me move. "Just keep that up."

Eventually, he starts telling me to go faster and I obey because I want to keep the feeling going. After a while, I feel myself getting ready to come, so I lean down and kiss him. "Can we switch?" I ask with a moan. "Will you be on top?" I love how hard he can go and he hits me in just the right spot when he's in control.

He nods his head with flushed cheeks and he rolls us in one fluid movement. He grabs my wrists and pins them to the bed as he pounds into me.

I get off quickly and he follows a few moments later with a hiss in my ear. We rest for a few moments before he kisses my temple and rolls off the bed.

"Go back to sleep," he says softly as he gets dressed. I watch him walk about the room as I pull the covers up. When he's finished and he combs his hair out, he walks over to me and kisses my lips. "I'll meet you in the Great Hall for breakfast, yes?" he says and I nod my head before he turns out the light.

When he leaves, I roll to the side and fall back asleep with a very uncomfortable wetness between my legs.

* * *

I haven't written anything in weeks and every time I try to sit down and actually come up with something, my mind draws a blank. All I think about now is Draco. How he smiles, how he makes me feel, the clever things he says. With each thought of Draco there's an underlining feeling of unease. That look Ivy had given me had really shook me and I can't help but try to figure it all out. The cryptic things that Blaise had said, the way Daphne acts like Draco is her boss, and the looks I always get...

Ugh, it hurts my brain.

I glare down at the empty page and chew on the end of my pen as I try to think of something to write. My thoughts, of course, drift to Draco again. He's such a mystery to me. I could ask him, of course, but but I never get a straight answer from him and he always turns it around on me somehow. I know that's not the best thing to think about the person you love, but it's true. I have to be honest with myself.

Draco can spin a good story.

I look down at the page again and sigh. Unlike like me, apparently.

With an irritated glare, I snap my notebook closed and stick my pen behind my ear. I look out at the lake and squint my eyes against the sun as I try not to worry too much about it. Draco has been giving me nightly occlemency lessons that wear me out, but the nightly shags aren't so bad. I think of it with a little smile and I touch my lips with my fingers.

"Can I sit with you?"

I jump and snap my neck to the right to see Hermione approaching me with quiet steps. It's a Sunday, so she's wearing her casual clothes. A pair of jeans, white trainers, and a pink t-shirt.

I don't answer, I just nod my head and sit forward again, trying to still my beating heart.

I scoot over as she sits beside me and we sit in silence for a while until she finally speaks. "How are you doing, Ginny?" she asks softly.

I itch my cheek nervously and look at the lake. "I'm fine. How are you?" I ask formally. I haven't spoken to her yet. In fact, I've been avoiding her since we've been here.

"I'm tired," she says honestly and then I glance at her from the corner of my eyes. She has her thick frizzy hair up in a messy bun and her eyes looks dark. "It's hard," she says and then she licks her dry lips. "It's hard to go to class and try to act normal when nothing is normal."

"Do you like having your own room, though?" I ask. "Being headgirl and all. I thought it would be your dream come true."

"My priorities have changed," she says dryly. Another silence falls over us and I hug my notebook to my chest. "This is the only time I've seen you alone," she says, her eyes studying my profile. "You're always with those girls... or _him_."

She says _him_ like he was some deadly disease.

"Yeah," I say as I nod my head because she's right. "I came out here to be alone," I admit in a whisper as I look behind me like I thought some Slytherins would be there watching me.

I'm never alone anymore. Pansy and Daphne are always around when I'm not with Draco and the Slytherins in my grade always keep an eye on me in class. That's another concerning thing, but I try to tell myself it's just because they like me... that I'm Draco's girlfriend so it's normal... That Draco just wants them to be my friends too so I can fit in better...

A part of me knows that's complete bullshit, though.

"Oh," she says and then she turns her body more towards mine. "Is he... is he nice to you?"

"Is who nice to me?" I ask, knowing full well who she means.

"Malfoy... he's so mean to everyone else," she says and then she purses her lips. "Is he nice to you?"

"Yes," I answer truthfully. I finally look her in the eyes so I can convey what I really mean. "He is so sweet to me."

"I've noticed the way he acts towards you," she says and I raise an eyebrow. "He's always with you, leading you around, and touching you... You hated it when Dean was so possessive like that."

"I know," I say because it's the truth. I shrug. "I guess I just don't notice it so much when Draco does it. It makes me feel special, I guess," I admit a dark secret to her and she furrows her brows. "Dean was just awkward about it, though... Draco seems like a gentlemen when he opens doors and puts his hand on my waist."

She eyes me for a few moments before looking down at my lap.

"Did he give you that?" she asks, nodding to the bracelet on my wrist.

I nod and put my arm out so she can see it better. "He did," I say and I smile a little bit as I remember the night he gave it to me. "Isn't it beautiful?"

"It looks very old," she says as she puts her fingers out to touch the dragons.

"Yes, I suppose it is," I muse as I look at the sparkling emerald eyes. "It's the nicest thing anyone has ever given me," I admit and she frowns.

"Harry told me about what happened in the common room the first night here," she says and I glance at her before looking away. "He said that when he got close to you, some kind of magic threw you back. What was that?"

"I think he was going to kiss me," I say to change the subject. "Why would he do that? He knew I'm with Draco."

She sighs loudly. "He's liked you for a while now, Gin," she says and I shoot her a look. "He didn't know what to do about it because of your brother, but seeing you with Malfoy is just killing him." I don't say anything... I just keep looking at her. "I know Malfoy might be exciting and all that. You can rebel against your family, whatever," she shakes her head. "But, Ginny," she puts her hand on my exposed knee. I'm wearing a denim skirt that I borrowed from Daphne and it is on the shorter side of the spectrum. "Harry _likes_ you. He's just been too nervous to admit it all this time."

"Why didn't you ever tell me?" I snap and she raises her eyebrows. She knew how much I liked Harry. If he's 'liked me' all this time, she should have mentioned it. "Or is this just Ron's scheme to get me to break up with Draco? I'm not a stupid little girl, Hermione, and this thing with my boyfriend isn't just a fling."

I stand up, so does she.

"Harry only told me he liked you that way this summer," she says and then she sighs. "But I think I've known that he's wanted you for a while... Just the way he looks at you..." she trails off. "He's my best friend and he made me promise not to say anything to anyone, especially you or Ron."

I cross my arms. "The timing of this seems suspicious," I snort and she shakes her head.

"Ginny, Harry likes you," she says. "Isn't that what you've always wanted? And he's so... sad all the time now. I think you'd be good for him. He needs someone to love him now, something more than what me or Ron could give him."

"I love Draco," I state solidly, even though there is a little flicker in my heart over Harry. I stamp it down quickly. I've made my choice already.

"How can you love him?" she says in disgust. "You barely even know him. You've been dating him for what... a few months maybe?" She shakes head. "And from what I've seen, your relationship with him isn't normal. He has way too much control over what you do."

"What are you talking about?" I scoff. "You don't know what our relationship is like.

"I know what I see," she says. "He never sits with your friends, he never lets you out of his sight, and I know what happened between you and Harry...that spell that made you get thrown back... that's not normal. That sounds like some kind of creepy dark magic to me." She looks at my bracelet. "Have you checked that for spells?" She asks and I glare. "Can you take it off?"

I flush for her last comment and then I narrow my eyes. "He doesn't sit my friends because I don't have any in my house that I'd want to introduce him to," I say hatefully, hoping to hurt her. "I thought you were my best friend until I realized your loyalty wasn't to me," I say as I stuff my notebook in my bag and I fling it over my shoulder. "It's always someone else," I mutter to myself. "I'm never anyone's number one."

"That's not true, Gin," she says with a head shake. "Where are you going?" she asks with a sigh as I start walking away.

"Away from you," I hiss and she jogs to catch up with me.

"Gin, I'm sorry about everything," she says but I narrow my eyes. "We'll be leaving soon," she says and I stop walking to glance at her. "We have to. Dumbledore told us to come back, but we haven't heard from him in months," she sighs and puts her hand on her neck. "We've found a way to kill Voldemort, Ginny," she says in a whisper as she looks around us to make sure no one is listening. "There are things we have to find before we can, but once we do, we can finally destroy him for good."

"That's... That's good..." I say like an idiot because I can't say anything else.

"Harry might die," she says in a tight voice. "We all might. I don't want you holding a grudge against any of us. I miss your friendship and I'm sorry for what happened this summer, but some things are more important."

"Right," I tell her and then I look away. "I have to meet Pansy," I say honestly as I check the time on the wall when we get inside. "We'll talk later, yeah?" I say, my anger melting and she nods her head.

"Yeah," she whispers as she watches me walk off.

When I meet Pansy and Daphne in the hallway by the Slytherin common room, they look annoyed. "Where have you been?" Pansy asks as she checks her watch. "We've been waiting."

"Sorry," I mutter as she turns towards the portrait to give the Slytherin Password.

Daphne takes my arm. "It's alright," she says brightly as we walk into their common room and I try to ignore the pain in my heart after the conversation with Hermione. Their common room isn't very inviting either... It's all dark and green and menacing looking. It's nothing like the warmness in Gryffindor tower. "We weren't waiting that long."

"Good," I say with a sigh as I let myself get pulled towards the seventh year girl dorms.

When we get to their room, Daphne sits me down at one of the chairs in front of a large mirror and she starts brushing out my hair. Pansy digs through her school chest and pulls out a bottle of wine. I look down at the bracelet on my wrist. To be honest, I haven't even tried to take it off. I frown at the thought of what Hermione said and I use my right hand to try to remove it.

"Where did you get that?" I ask as Daphne finds a pair of scissors in one of the drawers. She's been determined to cut my bangs and she's been bothering me about it for days. I finally gave in this morning when she started to whine over breakfast.

"There's a secret passage in our common room," Pansy says as she pops the cork and lets it breathe for a few moments before taking out three plastic cups.

Classy.

"It leads right outside of Hogsmeade and there's a place that sells the best wine a few blocks down."

"So you can leave the castle?" I say with a frown as Daphne combs out my bangs so she can trim them. I bring the bracelet up to my teeth in an attempt to open the clasp because my fingers don't seem to be strong enough.

"Not many people know about it," Pansy answers as she pours the wine into the cups. Daphne smacks my hand because it's in the way and I go back to trying to slip the bracelet off as it rests against my lap."Only Draco knows how to open it. His grandfather gave him the password last year. I would appreciate it if you didn't run and tell everyone that fact."

I nod my head. "Yeah, I won't." I honestly.

"Ready?" Daphne asks once she combs my bangs the way she needs them. They are getting long. They reach the top of my cheeks now. I don't think they officially count as bangs when they're that long, actually.

"Don't make them too short," I say worriedly as I stop fiddling with the jewelry. "There is nothing more stupid looking than a girl with bangs that are too short."

She laughs and brings the scissors up. "I'm a professional, Ginny, just relax," she says as she takes one of the plastic cups from Pansy and she takes a significant gulp before setting it down on one of the tables.

"Could you not drink right before cutting my hair?" I say seriously and she snorts.

"Don't worry," she says as she gathers some hair in her hand. She brings up the scissors and they make an irritating cutting noise as they chop through my hair. The strands fall on my lap and I sigh at them "It's just a little hair maintenance, is all. Nothing too serious."

"Right," I whisper as she moves the scissors through my bangs. Each cut is like sandpaper on my ears and I start biting my nails once she's out of the way.

Whens she's finished, she combs my bangs again and I dust off the hair, gathering it up and throwing it away before walking towards the mirror to have a look. It actually doesn't look too bad and I touch them before smiling. They rest right at my eyebrows now, like bangs should.

"What do you think?" Daphne asks as she walks towards me and hands me one of the plastic cups of wine.

"It looks good," I say before taking a drink. "Thank you."

"You know, if it paid better I believe I would enjoy being a hair stylist," she says as she puts my hair over my shoulders and she grins at my reflection.

"You are good at it," I say as I look at her own curled hair that she has done up in a complicated looking twist.

I sit on Daphne's bed and flick through a magazine while Daphne and Pansy talk about Blaise Zabini and what a whore he's being this year. It's a shoe catalog and I think about the snake skin pumps I wear everyday... I should get some of my own. I know eventually I'd have to return the shoes to her. They don't belong to me, after all, and I figure I could buy a few pumps of my own.

"What do you think, Gin?" Pansy asks as I bite my lip and try to decide what shoes I want to order.

"About what?" I ask as I turn the page.

"About Blaise. I think I'm going to break up with him." I look up and take a drink from my glass as Pansy eyes me.

"I didn't know you were actually with him," I admit and she narrows his eyes .

"I told you we had an open relationship, but I gave him an ultimatum. Either we get serious or it's over."

"What did he say to that?" I ask softly as she downs her cup.

"He laughed," she says bitterly and I give her a sympathetic look as Daphne pats her back. "I don't even know why I tried. He can't keep it in his pants."

"But he's so pretty," Daphne sighs and Pansy shoots her a hateful look.

"Zabini is a jerk," I say as I think of our talk in the owlery and she nods her head in agreement. "You deserve better."

"I know I do," she says and then she looks at Daphne. "You're right, of course. It's harder because he's pretty." She laughs a little and I smile sadly.

"When do you think you'll do it?" I ask softly and she shrugs her shoulders.

"I might just write him a note. He probably wouldn't even mind," she states bitterly. I furrow my brows.

"Doesn't he like you?" I ask cautiously. To be honest, I've never seen him treat her in any good way like a boyfriend would. "I mean, when you're alone, is he sweet?" I ask as I think of Draco.

She raises her eyebrows. "As sweet as he can be," she says with a shrug. "It's not exactly in his DNA to be loving."

"Oh," I say softly as I close the magazine.

"Is Draco loving to you?" Daphne asks as she takes a strand of Pansy's hair and she starts braiding it.

"Yeah," I admit as I blink a few times. I look back down at the bracelet and try to pull it off without bothering with the clasp, but it's too small to fit over my hand. "He's very loving."

"I wonder what that's like," Daphne says with a sigh as I clench my teeth and try to angle my wrist the right way to successfully take the bracelet off. "Draco is so short and hateful when he talks to me."

"That's because he doesn't like you that much," Pansy says as she looks down at her fingernails with her long legs crossed. Daphne makes a scoffing noise.

"Hey, he does."

Pansy looks at me and rolls her eyes before taking a drink from her cup. "You slept with his uncle," Pansy says with an irritable sigh. I didn't actually know Draco had an uncle and I make a face. "You knew how pissed off he was."

"Well," Daphne scrunches up her face. "His uncle seduced me."

"Hardly," Pansy says with an eyeroll.

"That was last year anyways," Daphne says like it was no big deal. "It wasn't _that_ big of a deal."

"It doesn't matter. Draco doesn't like loose women," Pansy says and she winks at me when I look at her. Daphne pulls her hair and Pansy cusses. "I was just joking," Pansy snaps as she pulls away so Daphne can't cause anymore damage as she rubs her scalp. "Don't be a bitch."

"Ginny, what are you doing?" Daphne asks as I put my arm against the bed so I can get a better hold on the clasp. "You look retarded."

I glare at her. "I'm trying to take off this bracket," I say as I furrow my brows and attempt to use my fingernails to pry it open. "Can one of you help me?" I ask as I get off Daphne's bed and I take a seat by Pansy with my wine cup in my right hand. I hold out my wrist to her. "Can you take it off?"

"Why do you want it off?" she asks skeptically and I shrug.

"I just want to," I say and she eyes me for a few serious moments before opening her mouth to respond, but someone comes barreling into the room without preamble. I snap my hand back to my lap.

"You guys need to listen to this," Ivy Parkinson runs over to the wireless radio against the wall. She spares me a little glance before turning it on and turning up the volume. "The whole castle is listening," she adds seriously.

_...The body of Albus Dumbledore was found this afternoon in the basement of a dilapidated home in Knockturn alley... _

I drop my cup of wine and it splashes all over the hardwood floor. I cover my mouth with my hand and widen my eyes as I listen to the radio.

…_.His body was thin and near death when the Aurors say someone used the killing curse to end the renowned wizards life..._

Harry.

With Dumbledore gone, Harry isn't safe.

"I have to go," I say. I get off the bed and head towards the door, ignoring Pansy as she calls after me.

When I get to the hallway, I start running. I head towards the head boy and girl hall and when I get to Hermione's door, I pound on it.

"Hermione, it's Ginny. Open the door."

A few seconds later, the door slides open and I step inside to see Harry and Ron both sitting on the bed with worried looks on their faces. The radio is on and the same voice I heard in the Slytherin dorms is coming from the speakers.

"You've heard," I point out and Harry nods his head. "Harry, you have to leave," I say seriously and Hermione closes the door behind me.

"We've tried. All of the secret passages out of the castle have been blocked... and there are dementers at the door," she says softly with a worried frown on her face

_Oh my god..._

We all look at the radio when the announcer says that. That can't be good.

_This just in: the Ministry has fell. _

My heart starts hammering.

_Reports are pouring in from all over England. The Ministry of Magic has been taken over by a group of black cloaked figures... The Dark Mark was seen above the carnage... Another report: Gringotts has been seized and many goblins slaughtered...Azkaban has been broken into and many inmates freed...Oh, my god... _

The announcers voice gets cut off and then there's dead air, buzzing through the radio in a eery whisper.

I look at Harry. He stands up and pulls on his hair.

"Goverment and money," Hermione whispers and then she gives us all a worried look. "Education is next. They'll be coming for Hogwarts."

"You have to leave," I state again, more fiercely this time and Harry snaps me a look. "Snape isn't going to protect you or the castle. McGonagall isn't even here to help."

"How, Ginny? We're not ready to fight him and there's no way to leave."

"Wait," I say as I think of what Pansy said in her room. "Stay here," I say quickly before leaving the room.

I run across the hall and say Draco's password. I run in and find him sitting by his writing desk, polishing his shoes as he listens to the radio.

"Draco," I say quickly and he puts his polishing rag down as I run over to him. "I need your help," I tell him seriously and he stands up, towering over me. "Harry needs to leave this castle and all the exits are blocked."

"What am I supposed to do about that?" he asks flatly. His eyes look cold and lifeless. I don't like it, so I take a step closer to him and I take his hand.

"Pansy said that there's a passageway in the Slytherin common room that leads just outside of Hogsmeade. She said you're the only one who knows how to open it."

"And..." he says coldly and I blink back tears as I think about the terrible things that will happen if the Dark Lord finds my brother and his very important friends.

"Draco, you can't deny that he's back now," I say as I motion to the radio. There's a new voice now, and the dark voice keeps on listing off the different government buildings and public places that the Death Eaters have taken over in their coup. "Please help," I say with my eyes watering. "They will kill Harry if he doesn't get out tonight."

He just stares at me and I let tears slip down my cheeks.

"Draco, please," I say softly. "Please help." I'm not above begging when it comes to the lives of people I care about. "Please," I say as I lean up to place a convincing kiss against his lips. "Please help me."

There's a loud beep and then Headmaster Snape's voice filters through the room.

"All students report to the Great Hall," his sour voice says calmly. "I repeat, all students and their head of houses are to report to the Great Hall immediately." There's another loud beep signaling the end of the announcement and I look at him again.

"Please," I say with a pitiful sob. I place another kiss at the corner of him mouth to try to win him over as I wrap my arms around him. Why isn't he helping! "Please, for me?"

After a few moments, I hear him sigh.

"Fucking fine," he says as he slips on his newly polished shoes. He walks over to his door and opens it. Students are running to get to the Great Hall and he looks over his shoulder. "Can he make it through the halls unnoticed?"

I think of his invisibility cloak and I nod my head.

"Good," is all he says as he walks back into his room and he pulls two Slytherin cloaks from his wardrobe. He hands them to me and I take his hand, leading him to Hermione's room where I pound on the door again.

"It's Ginny," is all I say and then the door opens. They're all up and packing their bags quickly, but when they see Draco, they all freeze and raise their wands.

"Wait," I say with my hand up. "Wait, he can help."

"Ginny, what are you thinking?" Ron hisses as he glares at me.

"He knows a way out of the castle. He can help," I say as I squeeze his hand.

"How can we trust him,? Hermione says as she flicks her eyes to Draco who looks away with an eyeroll.

"You can trust him because I trust him. When Snape notices we're not in the Great Hall. They're going to go looking for us. What other options do you have?"

"Do you really trust him on this?" Hermione asks as she looks deeply into my eyes. I nod my head and after a few moments she sighs. "Fine," Hermione says as she looks at Harry. "It's our only plan right now."

I throw his cloaks to Ron and Hermione as Harry puts on his invisibility cloak. I watch as Hermione tucks her hair under the hood and covers her face before we leave the room. The halls are a mad place, with students running and pushing one another over in panic and in a hurry to get to the great hall. I see Neville running towards one of the exits of the castle, but he gets blasted back by a security charm. No way out now. I just hope this secret passage can deliver.

When we get to the Slytherin common room, it's completely empty and I figure everyone is in the great hall. I watch as Draco walks over to the fireplace and he looks at all of us before shaking his head and tapping a few stones beside the mantle with his wand while whispering a quiet phrase in an old language I don't recognize.

When the fireplace turns to reveal a tunnel, an open and unblocked tunnel, I find a pleased smile on my face because it was true and Draco is helping.

"How do we know there aren't Death Eaters waiting for us on the other side of that tunnel?" Ron asks suspiciously as Draco leans against the wall with his arms crossed.

"You don't," Draco says flatly and I give him a look.

"He didn't volunteer to help," I point out. "I asked him. He wouldn't have this planned," I say and my brother sneers like the hateful beast he's become.

"Either we stay here and die or we go there and die," Harry says tiredly as he takes off his cloak, revealing himself.

"Here," Hermione digs through her small lavender purse and she pulls out a golden compact. "I have the other one," she says as I open it and look at the mirror. "Keep this on you. When we... if we..." she says as she flicks a glance to Draco. "If we get to safety, I'll let you know. The mirror will vibrate if I leave a message."

"Okay," I say with more embarrassing tears in my eyes as I give her a hug. "I'm sorry I was so short with you earlier," I say against her hair and she nods her head.

"Me too."

I go to my brother next and give him a firm hug. Ron was my best friend when we were little and I hold onto him a little longer than necessary. I couldn't take it if anything happened to him. Even though he is the biggest prat in the world, I still love him.

"If your boyfriend leads us to our death, I will never forgive you," he mutters as he hugs me back.

"Be safe," I tell him, ignoring his comment.

When I get to Harry, I hesitate a moment before giving him a quick hug. I don't want to start burning again, and when I pull back, I glance at Draco. He raises an eyebrow at me before I look back at Harry.

"Bye," I say weakly because I can't think of anything else to say. Hermione said that he liked me and now I feel kind of awkward being around him. My brother starts walking towards the tunnel with Hermione on his heels, but Harry just stares at me.

"Come with us," he says after a few long moments of silence.

"What?" Draco says dryly, but Harry ignores him as he takes a step closer.

"You're not safe here either, Gin," he whispers as he looks into my eyes. "Come with us. Please."

"_Please,_" Draco says sarcastically as he pushes himself off the wall so he can stand by me. "She's not going anywhere with you."

"That's not your call," Harry says darkly and then he looks back at me. "Ginny, I _want_ you to come with us."

How many years have I wanted to hear something like that from Harry Potter? Draco puts his arm around my waist and glares at my profile as I think of how to respond. Too many years, actually.

"No," I say with a dry throat, not exactly sure if it's the right decision or not. "I... I should stay here."

"Why?" Harry asks seriously and Hermione comes up to him and puts her hand on his shoulder.

"We've got to leave now," she says quietly. "Mrs. and Mr. Weasley will probably pull her out soon," she says gently. "She'll be safe and at least her family will know where she is."

Harry looks at me for one long moment before nodding his head and walking towards the tunnel. I wave to them as they leave and I sag my shoulders a bit when Draco shuts the passage way.

"Satisfied?" he says and when I look at him, I pull him to me in a tight hug. "We have to go to the Great Hall," he says after a few moments. "People will get suspicious."

I nod my head and I let myself get led towards the hall with his hand on my back. The Great Hall has been emptied of all it's tables and the house banners that usually hang from the walls are gone. All the students look confused and scared and I follow Draco until we're by Zabini and his small group of friends.

After half an hour of standing and worrying, the doors by the teachers table open and the faculty, plus a few other menacing looking figures, file out and stand before us as the hall quiets down.

A man I don't recognize steps towards the front and clears his throat. He's middle aged, with black hair that's white and gray peppered at his temples. His skin is very pale, like he hasn't seen the sun in a very long time and his eyes are rimmed in red. I fold my body more towards Draco and put my arm around his waist to keep him close as the man pulls a wand from a pocket in his black dress robes.

"My name is Izador Rookwood," the man says with a deep voice. A few students make some gasping noises at the name. I know Rookwood was a Death Eater... I don't know if this is the same notorious wizard that killed so many people during the first war with Voldemort. "After tonight I will officially be the new Head of Education and a liaison to the new Ministry."

I swallow the thick lump in my throat.

"Tomorrow you wake up to a new world and your education is going to be top priority in our empire," he says. "Classes will be canceled while we do evaluations on each and every student here." he says as his dark eyes skip around the room. "We'll be building a new curriculum and a new way of learning."

I bite my lip so hard it hurts.

"I know some of you would like to leave," he says as he zeros in on some of my Gryffindor house mates. "But if you try, you will officially be tried as blood traitors to our cause and sent for re-education in the newly established Azkaban penitentiary."

I glance around me until I find Neville nursing a wound from the protecting charms on the door. He looks one step away from cursing the man in front of us. There's a rage in his eyes that I've never seen Neville possess.

"Re-education?" I whisper but Draco shushes me.

"It has recently come to our attention that Harry Potter has left Hogwarts," he says as he puts his hand on his chest. "Any student known to have aided him in his departure will be punished to the full extent of the law." I start shaking, but Draco holds me firmly against him. "If anyone has any knowledge of his whereabouts, we urge you to come forward and share it with us. From this day forward, he is to be known as public enemy number one and he will be seized on sight," he says harshly and then he takes a deep breath. "Now, we want everyone in this room to rise to their full potential. Every drop of magical blood is needed for our world and we will hone your craft and help you grow within your required field."

I furrow my brows and I look at Zabini because he's crossing his arms. He has his eyebrows raised and he looks slightly amused by this whole thing. I shake my head and turn back to the man at the front of the room.

"There will no longer be houses dividing up the students of Hogwarts," he says as he takes out his wand and raises it to the ceiling. "We will live and die under one powerful symbol now. We are all in this for the greater good of our race."

He shoots out a spell from his wand and we all look up at the Dark Mark that's sizzling green against the cathedral ceiling. I think I might faint and I instantly regret not going with Harry and my brother. I hope my family's okay. We're known for being 'blood-traitor' and my father works at the ministry. I start biting my nails again as I worry about them. I hope they're okay. I blink back tears and I try to remind myself that no one could get past our wards. If they were home when this happened, they should be fine.

People start clapping and cheering as the Dark Mark glows against the castle walls, but I can't help the pool of dread that's in my stomach, making me feel all kinds of sick.

I flick at glance at Draco.

He's smiling and when he notices me staring at him, he brings a hand up and pulls my fingers away from my mouth.

"Stop biting your nails," is all he says before turning back to Rookwood who's still giving his speech on education reform and military diligence.

I feel sick and I hold my stomach to keep it from doing anything bad.

We're released to our rooms after that, with a reminder on the evaluations that will start in the morning, and I follow Draco all the way back to his room. I put the golden compact on Draco's writing desk and I stare at it intently for an hour as I chew on my fingernails and will it to work. Draco doesn't even try to talk to me as he sits down on the small loveseat by the window. He takes out a book to read like the world didn't just turn upside down all in three hours and I spare him a little glare before staring at the compact again.

When it finally vibrates, I jump up and grab it. I open it quickly and look into the mirror, sighing in relief when I see Hermione's face. She's covered in ash, but all in one piece.

"We were able to make it to a safe house," she says and my heart leaps. "Everyone is alright, but we can't talk for very long," she says and I nod my head. "Be safe, Ginny," she says before closing the compact, so I'm left staring at my own reflection again.

My heart is soaring now, and I run to Draco and pounce on him.

"Thank you," I say as I kiss him, throwing his stupid book to the side. "Thank you so much." I straddle his lap and kiss him deeply. "You saved their lives." I say softly when I pull back and I lock my hands around his neck. "Thank you. I love you so much."

"Yeah," he says dryly as he rolls his eyes.

I slide off of him and curl next to him, kissing his arm and his shoulder and his neck and his cheek over and over again to show him how grateful I am as I try not to worry about what tomorrow will bring. He picks up his book again and starts reading as I lean against his side and I tuck my feet underneath me after kicking off my shoes.

I stare blankly ahead of me, randomly kissing his arm as I try not to worry.

After a while, Zabini comes into the room unannounced, but Draco doesn't even look up from his book as Blaise clicks on the radio and sits on top of the writing desk. I stare at him as he pulls a cigarette from his pocket and lights it with his wand as a hissing and high pitched voice starts speaking.

I know whose voice that belongs to and I get a chill as I cuddle up closer to Draco.

Pansy comes into the room next and I sit up and give her a confused look as she closes the door and takes a seat on Draco's bed.

No one says anything and I worry my teeth between my lips as they all stare off, listening to the Dark Lord hiss out his plans for the future. Draco puts the book on his knee and bring his hand up to his chin as I stare at his profile and worry about my family. All of them belong to the Order... does the Dark Lord know that?

I kiss Draco's cheek just so I can touch him.

He glances at me and puts his arm around my shoulders, rubbing my arm as Voldemort goes on about unity and blood status and the importance of purity in family lines.

I tuck my head against his chest and stare at the floor as Zabini's cigarette glows against the dim lighting in the room...

When the speech is done, Blaise turns off the radio and the three of them share a long and significant look that's totally lost on me.

I feel something right now that is very uncomfortable for a Gryffindor like me to feel... Fear...

I'm officially afraid.

I look at Draco's profile again, and when he glances at me, I sit up and kiss him firmly against the lips, ignoring the other two in the room. I know I can trust him with anything after what he did for Harry, Ron, and Hermione tonight and all my doubts and worries and bad thoughts get thrown out the window. I slip onto his lap and bring my hand up to his neck as I continue to kiss him with all the passion I have in my body. When I pull back, I look into his eyes so he can see how grateful I am towards him... I want him to see how much I love him.

_I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. _

I keep repeating that thought over and over again, hoping he'll hear it if he decides to listen in on my thoughts. After a few moments of studying my face, he smiles and brings a hand up to my cheek. I take his hand and kiss his palm and his fingers and his wrist as my feet dangle off his lap.

"Gin, it's okay," he whispers as I hold his hand against my lips. He puts his free hand on my thigh. "Stop worrying."

He says that when we just listened to the public return of the Dark Lord on the freaking radio and everyone that I love could potentially be dead.

"You're with me," he says with a smirk, like everything was fine as I furrow my brows worriedly. "You're mine, Ginny. You're golden."

You're golden.

What does that even mean?


	10. Chapter 10

I'm laying on Draco's comfortable dorm bed while he sits between my legs with his back to me. He's reading from a large text about blood magic and he won't tell me why he was reading it. He shushes me every time I ask, so I've officially given up and I've been content with rubbing his back and shoulders for the past half hour.

I like being close to him. He makes me feel safe.

It's been two days since the whole world turned on it's side and he's been my only source of comfort in this scary and unstable situation. I scoot even closer to him with my feet on either side of his body as I think about how sweet he has been to me. I wrap my arms around his chest and I sigh when I feel his heart beat against my hand. I love him. With that girlish thought, I lay my head on his shoulder blade and listen to his breathing while I close my eyes.

"Why did you stop?" he questions in a deep voice as he turns the page. "That felt good."

I kiss the back of his neck and sit up straight, running my hands along his arms and up to his shoulders where I start to massage his muscles again. He puts his hand on my bare ankle and squeezes every once and a while as I lay back against his pillows with a sigh.

I'm too nervous about my family and about my future to be comfortable... so I just start biting my nails with Draco cradled between my legs.

A place where I find him most comfortable, actually.

He's wearing an old blue t-shirt from some summer quidditch team he was on, and I use my free hand to trace the yellow letters printed on his back. _M... A... L... F...O..._

"Do you want to talk about anything?" he asks gently as he taps his fingers against my foot. I trace the Y with my pointer finger before pulling away. "You seem restless."

Of course I am. He knows this.

"Are they ever going to let us send out owls?" I ask softly, running my fingers down his spine gently because I love touching him.

It makes him arch his back and I smile before he settles down again to answer me.

"No," he says like he knew for sure and I furrow my brows. "All letters are going to be read before being sent out to the appropriate channels."

"What?" I hiss as I sit up straight. Draco itches the back of his neck, not even bothering to look away from that stupid book.

"They told me during my evaluation," he says as he turns a page. "Everything is censored now," he says with a sigh. "So I would suggest not even bothering to send out that letter you have stuffed in your bag." I open my mouth to snap about that, but he continues speaking. "Getting mad about it won't change it. Save your breath," he says and I narrow my eyes.

I make a face as I glance at my bag that's thrown on his writing desk. I had written a letter to my parents yesterday, telling them everything about what's been happening at the school and wanting to know if they were okay. I just couldn't find an owl to send it out. When I went to the owlery, the doors were locked and the owls were gone... That's when I ran into Neville.

I glance at the uniform hanging on the back of the bathroom door as Draco's hand goes back to squeezing my ankle. He got a new one after his evaluation. I haven't seen it on him yet, but it looks ominous. It's all black; black shoes, black pants, black shirt, black tie, black jacket. Everything looks so dark and tailored and more military... that thought makes me shudder and I glare at the silver buttons on the jacket because they have small dark mark symbols etched into them.

"What will the girl's uniforms look like?" I ask seriously, ignoring the owl comment because Draco doesn't answer my questions in any satisfying way.

"I don't know," he says and then he cracks his neck.

He told me that his uniform would be different than a majority of the student body because he was head boy. The prefects would be the same as well... That's about all he told me about the evaluations... he said that they went as he expected and that I didn't have to worry about anything. All I worry about now is how he never tells me bloody anything.

"Babe," I say as I rub his back again. He's been so short with me today and I don't want him to blow off another one of my questions. "Can I ask you something?"

"You can ask me anything," he says gently as he squeezes my foot again.

"Will you actually answer?" I ask as I sit up again and wrap my arms around his torso. After a few moments, he sighs heavily and he closes the book. I'm thankful when he puts it on the nightstand and he finally turns his body towards mine, giving me his full attention so I'm not left staring at the back of his head.

"I've been distracted today," he says as he hooks his hands under my knees and he jerks quickly. I gasp as he pulls me down the bed. He settles his hips in between my legs and he brushes some hair away from my face as he rests on top of me. "I'm sorry," he adds. "What did you want to ask me?"

I bite my lip as I look over his face. His handsome perfect face. "I talked to Neville today," I say and his jaw tightens. I ignore it. "He said that they were going to move his parents from St. Mungo's and place them in a camp somewhere. They're doing that to all mental health patients at the hospital. Is that true?"

"When did you find the time to talk to him?" he asks levelly.

I narrow my eyes. He only said that because he's suspicious as to how I got away from my baby-sitters without being noticed.

"I'm sorry," he says once he notices my hateful glare. "Ask what you wanted," he adds, but I can tell he's not happy about it.

"Could you..." I lick my lips. "I mean, Neville said that for his evaluation they decided to send him away for re-eduction... What does that mean?"

"I honestly don't know," he says and I believe him. "I would tell you if I did," he adds and I nod my head.

"Could you help him leave?" I whisper and Draco furrows his brows. "I mean, through that opening in your common room. He's worried about what they're going to do to him and he wants to help his parents before they move them to that camp. His Grandmother is too old to do anything."

Draco stares at me and doesn't say anything for a long time.

I remember my talk with Neville and how worried he was as Draco mulls over my request.

I was trying to send out that letter to my parents and I was outside of the owlery door, cussing and trying to open up the door.

"Fucking open," I hissed as I tried to pry open the doors. I put the letter I intended to send my parents in between my teeth as I used both hands to pull on the large handle with all my might. "Damn," I snapped because it was starting to hurt my arms. I let go of the handle and I glared at the wooden door with a scowl on my face.

I didn't understand why it wasn't opening for me. The owerly was always open to students at all times during the day. It just didn't make sense to me at the time.

I took out my wand and attempt to unlock it, but of course that didn't work either. I tried pulling the large metal handle again, only to end up cussing some more and kicking it with my foot. No owls have been coming to breakfast because of the evaluations and I had thought they were all waiting in here, but the damn thing wouldn't let me in.

Did it ever actually have a door?

"Why won't you open?" I said to it with a frown on my face, not being as well informed as Draco on the owl censorship.

"It's locked," someone said from behind me and I jumped with my hand on my heart. I turned to see Neville standing there, with a solemn look on his boy like face.

"Obviously," I retorted bitterly as I glared at the door again. "But why is it locked? I have a letter I need to send."

"I don't know," he said gently. "I'm sure it's Umbridge's idea."

"Umbridge," I said in disgust as I remembered that foul woman. It sent an immediate chill down my spine and I knew nothing good would come from her being anywhere near our school. "Is she here?"

"Yeah, she is," he said and then he rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. It made me uneasy to see Neville so pale and shook up. With good reason, I found. "She was there for my evaluation," he said softly.

I had forgotten that his evaluation took place already to be honest. The seventh year boys had their evaluations first and it made me think of Draco. I always think of Draco and I felt a bit guilty about it because Neville was obviously troubled.

"How did it go?" I asked softly. I took a step towards him him just in case he needed a hug or something... but then I remembered the shock I got when Harry touched me, and I stepped back again.

He shrugs.

"What was it like?" I asked gently because he looked so tired now and so worn out. "Was it horrible?" I asked nervously.

"It was uncomfortable," he admitted and then he furrowed his brows. "They ask if you'll swear your allegiance to the Dark Lord," he said and I clenched my jaw.

"What did you do?" I asked carefully. I could feel it then, that uncomfortable pool in the pit of my stomach that made my insides freeze and hurt. I hated the feeling and I remember wishing that school was as carefree as it used to be in years past. But, of course, being so close to Harry Potter made that ideal nearly impossible.

"I said no," he replied with a shaky voice. "They gave me my papers," he said and then he gave me a troubled look. "I have to go for that 're-education' thing they were talking about."

I bit my lip. "Did they say what that was all about?"

He shook his head.

"Does anyone knows that that means? What do they do when they reeducate you?" I asked and he shrugged.

No one knows anything and the people that do... like Draco... don't bother sharing their knowledge I was finding out.

"I have no idea..." he trailed off and then he looked at me. "They're moving my parents," he said seriously and I remember frowning.

"What?"

"They told me that my parents have become a burden on the St. Mungo's staff. Everyone in the mental health wing is getting transferred.".

"To where?" I questioned.

Neville has always been such a sweet, and sometimes silly, boy. I often forget what happened to his parents. Bellatrix Lestrange is free now, out in the word to ruin families and make more decent and hard working people go mad with her wand. I wanted to hug him then, but I held back because I don't want to burn.

"I don't know. They said some sort of camp," he said and then his eyes snapped to mine. "I'm afraid they might kill them."

He let that hang in the air and I stared at him for a long time before he spoke again.

"I have to leave before they send me away," he said narrowly. "I have to get to my parents... to my grandmother... and make sure they're all safe."

"I know a way you can leave," I whispered as I thought of Draco.

I looked down the stairs and saw Pansy there, she was probably looking for me and I sighed tiredly.

He looked puzzled by my comment. "What?"

I took a step closer to him and I gripped his forearm to show how serious I was. Burning be damned "I know how Harry got out," I told him quietly so no one would hear. "I'll keep you informed," I told him before running off to Pansy before she saw me with Neville and questioned me.

I shake out of the memory and I look back at Draco. Why hasn't he said anything?

"Draco?" I saw as I bring my hand up to his face, running my knuckles over his cheek. "Will you help?"

He's silent again for another long moment but when he finally answers again, it makes my heart stop.

"No."

Perhaps I heard wrong.

"What?" I say gently and I blink a few times as he sits up on his knees and climbs off the bed.

"I said no," he says as he goes over to his desk and starts removing his watch.

I'm a little stunned and I get on my knees so I can get a better look at him. "Why not?"

"Because I said so," he says sharply.

I suppose he is actually saying no to me and I narrow my eyes.

"That's not a good enough answer. Why not help him? They might kill his parents and who knows what they're going to do during that re-education thing."

"I owe nothing to Neville Longbottom, Ginny. What has he ever done for me?" he asks as he turns around and crosses his arms. I'm a little baffled, to be honest.

"What?" I say again, not sure what to say. "What do you mean 'what has he done for me?'" I ask as I stand from the bed. "They might kill his parents."

"Don't be thick," he says and I raise my brows. "They won't kill his parents. You're all being so bloody dramatic about this whole thing."

"Of course we're being dramatic," I say with narrowed eyes. "It's the Dark Lord, Draco. He'll preform genocide on a whole race if he wants."

"Haven't I done enough for you?" he asks and I retract like he had hit me as he levels me with a glare. "I helped Potter and his stupid friends escape the castle for you. They would have my head if they knew I took any part in that."

"This isn't about doing anything for me," I say and he raises one eyebrow. "This is about doing what's right."

"I only do things that benefit me, Ginny," he says coldly and I open and close my mouth a few times before snapping it shut.

I don't know what to say to that.

"Now," he says, thinking he's won this conversation. "I am tired and I would like to go to bed."

I give him a hateful look as he goes to turn off his light and I stomp towards the writing desk to retrieve my bag. I'm not sleeping with him tonight.

"What are you doing?" he asks with a tired sigh and I glare at him.

"I'm going to my room," I tell him hotly and he narrows his eyes.

"Put the bag down," he says. "You aren't going anywhere."

"Well, I'm getting no benefit from staying here," I tell him, throwing it back in his face. "So I'm leaving."

I go to walk to the door, but he steps in front of me with a hard glare in his eyes.

"You are staying," he says and then he looks me over. "It's never good to go to bed angry," he adds a little softer and I furrow my brows.

"Move."

"No," he challenges. "Are you going to run away every time I say something you don't like?"

Jerk.

"Why won't you help Neville?" I ask seriously as I stare at his throat. "You are in the position to help, why not do it?"

"If he leaves the castle, they will find him," he says seriously. He takes my hand and he brings it up to his lips. I try to pull away, but he holds me firmly in place. "If he was selected for re-educaton, they would have put a tracker on him. He wouldn't have made it far and they would have killed him," he admits as he kisses my fingers. "He's safer here, he's safer going through the re-education training and coming back to the school. They won't kill his parents," he says gently as he moves his lips over my palm. "Killing the disabled is too much of a hateful PR move and the Dark Lord is trying to revamp his image."

"How do you know that?" I ask with a worried frown and he kisses my wrist.

"I know things, sweetheart," he whispers and then he pulls back from my hand. He licks his lips before bending down to kiss me. "Stay?" he asks as he takes the bag off of my shoulder. "Cuddle?" he suggests trying to win me over with a sly smirk. I look up at him with a confused tilt of my head.

I never know what to believe when I talk to him. He just jumbles things around in my mind and when he kisses me or touches me in any way... forget it...

"You're telling the truth?" I ask as I think of how broken Neville looked outside of the owlery.

"Always," he says and its a lie, but I don't press it because I want to believe him.

"Why didn't you just say that first," I scoff. "Instead of having me go through this whole fight."

"Come here," he says as he takes me by the arm, ignoring my question in that infuriating way that he does.. "Let's go to bed."

I stand in my spot for a while, just staring at him as he lets my bag drop to the floor.

"Ginny," he says softly as he takes a step closer to me and he runs his hand up my side. "Come to bed," he says gently.

I stare at him for a while until he bends down and places a soft kiss at the corner of my mouth.

"Is there anything we can do to help?" I press and he sighs as he pulls back, squeezing my arm.

"What can we do right now?" he asks with a sharp brow raised. "If he leaves, they find him and kill him. Simple as that. Do you want that?"

"No," I say. Of course I don't want that. It was a stupid question to ask.

"Good," he says as he pulls me towards the bed. "Let's go to sleep then."

I hold my ground for a few more stubborn moments before he shoots me a look.

I sigh.

Draco's passageway was my only game plan and now I'm stuck with nothing. I'll have to talk to Neville tomorrow, perhaps we could figure this all out together.

"Gin," he snaps and I look at him.

_Fine. _

I shake my head, but follow him to the bed anyways, crawling under the covers as he pulls them back for me. He turns off the light and rests beside me, but I'm still slightly confused and angry with him so I turn my back and frown. He rolls over after a few moments and puts his hand on my hip as I try to think of a way to help Neville.

Draco was right. If they put trackers on the kids who have to leave for the new education thing, then Neville is as good as dead if he gets out and then he might tell him who helped him and Draco would be dead too.

It hurts my brain.

I bring a hand up to my forehead and I try to smooth out my worry as I massage my temple. Draco grabs my hand.

"Do you want a sleeping potion to help you relax?" he asks as he brings my hand down and intertwines it with his own. I don't say anything and he sits up. "I'll get you one anyways," he retorts as he reaches under his bed and he pulls out a leather potions kit. He taps my shoulder and when I turn on my back he hands me a potions vial. "Drink the whole thing," he says as I sit up and uncork it.

I've been so nervous with worry that I've barely slept in days and I bring the potion up to my lips and take it down in one gulp.

Draco takes the vial from me and puts it in the case, snapping it shut with a flick of his fingers. I instantly feel drowsy as I lay back against the pillows while Draco puts his case back under the bed.

"This works well," I say groggily as I close my eyes. I'm already at ease and ready for sleep. "Come here," I whisper as I pull his body towards mine. I want to cuddle up against him and fall asleep. He's always so warm. "I want to touch you," I whisper, feeling almost drunk as I tuck myself against him and I kiss his shoulder.

"You can touch me anytime," he says and I laugh because I can practically feel his smirk.

I place my hand at the hem of his shirt and move up until it's resting on the smooth skin of his stomach. He inhales deeply but I ignore it as I start to drift off, with his warm body against mine.

Sleeping wasn't as peaceful as I had hoped.

I fall into a fitful sleep with horrid dreams about snakes and chambers and blood.

The chamber of secrets had always been a place in my nightmares and I was right back at the center of it again, laying on the ground like I did when I was eleven, staring up at Tom as the Basilisk slithered around us. It smells damp and it feels cold... and so close to being real that I can feel my heart skipping a few beats.

"Blood is important," Tom says. He walks around me with his handsome face set in a pleased smile as he drains the life out of me. "Blood is the most important thing in our world. Did you know that, Ginny?"

I didn't answer. I couldn't. I just looked away from him and tried not to let the headache take me over.

The basilisk moves past us, by the far wall, and I clench my eyes shut quickly. Looking at it made it real, and when it was real, it made me scream.

"I've always felt dirty," Tom pulls me back to the conversation.

He said that softly, like he didn't want me to hear him. I glance at him again through the haze of tears that were threatening to fall as he traces the veins on his pale wrist. He glances at me and then he quickly kneels beside me, running his fingers over my temple and cheek, tracing the thin blue lines down my neck like it was the most fascinating thing in the world.

His fingers are like ice and they make shiver.

"Your blood is so clean," he says like a madman as he bends down and puts his face against my neck. He inhales and I let a sob escape. "I could drink your blood like wine," he adds darkly and I try to pull away from him, but I'm too weak.

I'm always too weak and he is always so strong.

"Stop," I manage to choke out. I don't know what I want him to stop, really. I just want him to go away.

"I will never stop," he says levelly as he sits back on his knees. "It's not in my nature. You would do well to remember that."

Another quiet sob escapes my throat. He moves until he's hovering above me, with his black eyes taking me in critically.

"You're a powerful witch," he says, eyeing me again as he slowly sucks the life from my body. "Look at you, just eleven years old and your force is strong enough to bring me back. I think I chose you well," he says and then he takes my hand and starts tracing the blue veins webbing under my skin. "And your blood," he mentions gently with he brings my hand up to his lips.

They felt cold and I tried to pull away, but he jerked me back.

I whimpered.

"It's curse breaking blood, did you know that? You're special, Ginny," he says before moving his lips to my wrist, speaking against my skin softly. His breath felt like a chilly winter wind and I just wanted to die. "You're different and I have you all to myself," he says gently before sinking his teeth into the tender flesh of my wrist.

I scream and arch my back. His bite isn't as cold as the rest of him is. In fact, the pain burns hot and I try to get away, but he holds me firmly down with his knees on my thighs. My heart beat is racing so fast I think I might pass out and I start calling for my Mom like a little child. Whimpering and crying and begging for my mother to come and save me from all of this.

It was an empty prayer. I knew that. My Mother couldn't reach me here in the Chamber. No one could.

I keep calling for her anyways and it makes him laugh.

He smiles darkly against my wrist before biting down again and sucking more blood. When he finally pulls back, he inhales deeply like it was his first breath ever, and then looks right at me. My blood is dribbling down his chin; he looks like a vampire. His coloring changed, it turned less waxy and more human. Less like a ghost and more like a man. Even his cheeks were a little bit flushed and when he smiled, he had my blood coating his teeth giving him an all together frightening appearance. I couldn't help the deep and intense scream that broke from me, echoing off the walls and vibrating my ear drums.

The giant snake hissed somewhere in the distance, but I didn't care.

I would do anything to look into the snake's eyes now.

Tom quickly clamped his ice cold hand over my mouth and glared down at me with onyx eyes. "No one can hear you," he said in a menacing hiss, his breath now warm on my face. He was turning more real. "No one knows where you are." he flicks a glance down my body and then he looks me in the eyes. "It's a shame you aren't older," he says with a frown. "My teenage body is very excited by blood," he says and I didn't know what he meant so I just cried. "But now my young little friend," he says as he removes his hand and leans towards me. "You sleep," he says before planting a harsh kiss against my quivering lips.

It left blood on me. My blood.

It was my first kiss.

And it was with _him_.

This all felt so real... the feelings... the smells... the coldness in Tom's hands... The pain...

I bolt upright in my safe bed, back to reality once more. When I realize it was just a dream, I put my hand over my eyes and try to shake it off. It was just a dream... it can't hurt me... I'm sweating now, so I push my bangs from my eyes as I try to calm myself down. I do have a headache. A really terrible piercing headache and I bring my hand up to my temples as I try to rub it out.

Eventually the pain dies to a minor ache and I reach for Draco in the darkness, but he's not on his side of the bed. Still shook up from the dream, I quickly jump for the light and I click it on.

I find Draco sitting in the chair by his writing desk, looking right at me with darkened eyes.

When we make eye contact, he raises an eyebrow. "Bad dream?" he asks as he stands from the chair.

Was he just sitting there in the dark, staring at me as I slept? I nod my head and pull the covers further up my chest as he starts walking towards me. I notice he has his wand in his hand and I frown at it as he puts it down on the night stand. "What were you doing up?" I ask in a voice thick with sleep as he crawls into bed beside me.

"I couldn't sleep," he says as he turns off the lights and pulls me towards. "Go back to sleep," he says, adding a kiss to the top of my head.

"Why were you sitting in the dark?" I ask with a yawn... but the sleeping potion overtakes me again before I get an answer and the last thing I feel before drifting off into sleep is Draco gently caressing my arm.

I go right back to where my dream left off, only this time I was more lucid and outside of my little body. I was standing off to the side, by the large statue of a snake as Tom walked around my smaller form, taunting and teasing and hurting.

I gasp when I feel someone grip my hair tightly in their hands and I almost scream until I hear Draco's voice.

"He's envious of you," he says as he jerks my head to the side so he can suck on my neck.

"He's killing me," I whisper as I watch Tom hover over my eleven year old form as Draco and I stand in the shadows. He still has my blood dripping from his lips and he knows how much he's scaring me. That's why he's doing it. Tom thrived on fear.

"Dark magic lingers, little Ginny," Tom says as Draco reaches in between my legs, hiking up my sleep shirt. "And you had enough even before I came into the picture."

"That's not true," I whisper as Draco works his fingers against my body and my little girl self cries on the damp stones.

"Is it not?" Draco asks against my neck. The basilisk slithers behind us and I try to wake myself up because this dream is going to hell fast. I try to turn around, but he holds me firmly against him, with my back against his chest.

"No," I say as I shake my head. Draco jerks my head back by my hair until I'm looking at him. His silver eyes look dark; this is the most vivid dream I've ever had... and my scalp hurts from the way he's pulling my head.

It feels real.

I'm thinking real thoughts.

I _hate_ this.

"No?" he says gently and then he bends down to kiss me viciously with his teeth biting my lower lip painfully hard.

"That hurts," I whisper when he pulls back to breathe and I hitch my breath when his fingers slip inside me.

This feels way too real.

I try to pull his hand away and cross my legs as I look towards Tom and little me over by the door. Tom's still circling my body, saying terrible things to me as Draco works his fingers.

"You're ready," Draco whispers against my ear. "Get on your knees."

"No, I..." I trail off and bite my lip. This is the worst time possible to have a sex dream.

"Don't think," he says as he pulls my shirt over my head. He throws it on the ground and starts pushing me down until I'm on my hands and knees. "Just feel."

I close my eyes to get away from the image before me and I hold my breath as Draco lowers my knickers.

Tom starts telling me a story, about a serpent and a queen and a curse and a boat and I try to block it out as Draco puts his hand on my neck and positions himself behind me.

"…_...The king, thinking his new Queen was a dark witch, snapped her wand and banished her to the sea. On a small boat, where she was sure to die, the Queen spent days alone in the middle of the ocean adding more water to it with her tears. On the seventh day, thirsty and hungry, the youngest sister was near death when Dark wizard found her and disguised himself as a serpent once more, appearing on her small boat."_

Tom carries on telling that horrid story and I try to block him out.

Draco kisses my shoulder, pulling me away from it and he unhooks my bra.

He pounds into me from behind, and I don't want to watch anymore of the bad dream, so I rest on my forearms and put my head down as I focus on the way Draco feels inside of me. I feel him grab my breasts as he leans more on my back. He's ruthless in his movements and it's almost painful as I put my forehead down on my forearms and pray that it'll be over soon. It feels good, don't get me wrong, but it's almost too intense, too hard for me.

The noises aren't pleasant either. Draco's body smacking against my own are playing against Tom's silky voice in the background. The snake hisses somewhere to the left again and I clench my jaw. It's not sexy.

"_When the seventh moon is in the second house.._" Tom says as he twirls my hair around one of his long pale fingers. I try to block his voice out again.

"You don't love him, do you?" I hear Draco ask me in a breathless voice as he drills into me.

"Who?" I whisper with a moan as the friction starts to build in between my legs.

He twists his hand in my hair again and pulls my head up. "Him," he says as he sucks on my ear.

I look at Tom as he kneels over my smaller body, and I clench my eyes shut as I shake my head.

This is a fucked up dream.

This is even worse than the corpse dinner or the bloody hands nightmares I always have. This one feels too real.

"I can't hear you," he says, punctuating each word by a hard thrust. I inhale a sharp breath and bite my hand.

"I don't love him," I whisper into my skin. I feel my legs shaking. "No one has ever loved him.

"You love me?" Draco asks against my ear.

I don't say anything... I can't say anything. It all feels too real and too much.

I make a whimpering like noise in the back of my throat when he bites down on my shoulder.

He doesn't let up.

"That hurts," I whimper. He bites down a little harder and I feel my eyes swell up as he bites a little harder. "Please, Draco. It hurts."

He grips my hips so hard it burns.

"Draco," I say again, and he must have heard me this time, because he loosens his grip and he kisses my shoulder softly. "Thank you," I whisper in relief as he puts his hand on my back, running his fingers up my spine.

"Come here," he whispers as he slips out of me and he maneuvers me until I'm on my back, laying against the cold concrete. It hurts. He settles back inside of me as he puts his hand up to rest by the side of my head. He sighs gently and starts rolling his hips. "I love the way you feel," he says with a smile and I bring my hand up, cupping his cheek. "You love me?" he asks again and I nod my head, feeling tears leak from the corner of my eyes.

He kisses them away.

"I love you," I tell him gently and he smiles before wrapping his arms around me and pulling me close.

I hear the snake slithering again, getting closer and closer to us.

Draco kisses me once more before I see the large beast from the corner of my eyes.

Then everything goes black.

I wake early. My body is sore and I rub my eyes as I sit up. It's still dark outside and I glance at Draco as he slumbers beside me with his arm thrown over his face.

What a weird, terrible dream.

I stumble out of bed and head towards the bathroom, noticing the uncomfortable ache between my legs. It was just a dream, right? Perhaps my body is feeling it's side effects. I take a quick shower because I feel odd and as I'm washing my body, I notice the red marks on my shoulder. Upon closer inspection I find that they're bite marks and I furrow my brows as I look down at my hips. There are bruises there already from Draco's fingers.

Oh. _Damn._

I guess that part wasn't a dream and I feel weird with it as I shampoo my hair with an uncomfortable feeling in my stomach.

All the things that were said... did he see what I was seeing? Was he having the same dream as me? That's stupid... that's impossible. There is no way that Draco had been stuck with me in the chamber of secrets with a young Dark Lord.

What the hell?

We did have sex, apparently. I was just dreaming during it. I wonder if Draco noticed... I touch the bite mark on my shoulder and hiss. I can't believe that didn't wake me.. it really hurts!

God, what if I said something embarrassing?

What if I _did _something embarrassing?

Do people have sleep sex like some people sleep walk?

_Fuck me. _

After getting clean, I step out of his small shower and use one of his blue towels to dry off. I forgot to bring clothes into the bathroom with me. I sigh as I wrap the towel around my body and leave the bathroom with my hair hanging on my shoulders, dripping water down my body. It's chilly in the morning and I shiver a bit as I close the door behind me. The sun is just now staring to shine, and I squint my eyes against it as I walk over to the writing desk so I can pull some clean clothes from my bag.

As I'm pulling out a clean shirt, a book falls out and lands on the floor with thump.

It's that children's book I had taken from Daphne's house. I eye it for a few moments and then with a curious tilt of my head, I pick it up.

Why did I want this?

I think of the story I read in my therapists office... That horrid children's story with creepy illustrations... the same story Tom was saying to me in the chamber in my fucked up dream...

Oh, right.

With purpose, I sit down and start flicking through it, trying to find that story.

_The Tale of the Serpent and the Queen_

I furrow my brows when I find the title page and I start scanning it for one line in particular. I hear Draco rustle behind me as I flip through the pages.

"What are you doing up so early?" I hear him say in a voice thick with sleep.

"Couldn't sleep," I answer with a shrug as I turn the page.

The floor boards creek when he stands and I hear him walk towards the bathroom. I ignore him when he comes back out as I bury my nose in the book.

"How long have you been awake?" Draco asks with a yawn as he walks towards me and he moves wet hair away from my neck. "You smell nice," he adds he bends down and kisses my neck.

I wince because it's so close to the bite mark.

"I haven't been awake that long," I admit as I lean back in the chair, liking the feel of his warm hands on my arms in the cold morning chill.

"Oh," he says and then he pauses for a moment. "Oh, babe," he says in sympathy like he felt sorry for me and when I glance at him in question, he bends down and kisses the angry looking bite mark on my shoulder. "I didn't realize I was being so rough with you last night."

"It's okay," I whisper and then I sigh as I bring my hand up to his cheek. "I was dreaming when we were... you know," I say with a blush as he kisses my shoulder. "It was weird... I never really woke up. I was still stuck in a dream."

"Hopefully a good dream," he says with a smirk against my skin. "Judging by the way you were moaning my name, I suppose that is the truth."

"I wasn't moaning your name," I scoff. He puts his hands on either side of me on the writing desk as he presses his lips against the top of my head.

"Of course you were," he says with a smirk as he brings his knuckles up to run up and down my bare arm.

He's being very loving today.

"What else would you be moaning about?" he asks and I can practically feel him smile as I go back to the book. "Aren't we a little old for fairy tales, Gin?" he asks when he notices what's in front of me.

"Did you say this to me once?" I ask as I find the line. It's the same one Tom had said to me in the chamber in my dream.

He leans down so his cheek is placed against my own and his eyes quickly scan the page. "When the seventh moon is in the second house..." he trails off. "Probably," he answers with a shrug. "Why?"

"It's just... why did you say it?" I ask as I look at the illustrations of this horrid children's story.

He shrugs again. "It's a saying," he says like I was stupid. "It means everything is aligning perfectly."

"Really?" I say as I bite my lip. His clever fingers start to work their way to the knot in the towel I'm wearing, but I ignore it. "I've never heard it before."

"There's probably a lot you don't know," he says as he removes the towel. I try to cover myself, but he pushes my hands away and forces me to stand up. He kicks the chair out of the way and before I get a chance to respond, he bends me over.

"What are you doing?" I ask even though I know perfectly well what he's doing.

"I don't know what it is," he says as he runs his fingers down my back. "But everything about you has been turning me on lately," he says and I face forward with my chin resting on my forearms as I wait for another ride.

I glance down at the book as Draco starts to caress me and kiss my back, and I furrow my brows at that last sentence again.

_When the seventh moon is the second house, a powerful union between the two families will set the world on fire..._

I make a face, but when Draco enters me again, I crunch up the page in my hand so tightly that it rips.

* * *

I hold my arm and bend my elbow as I try not to cry. The old woman puts a cotton ball on my wound after removing the syringe and she walks off with a vial of my blood. Why do they need that? Where is she taking it?

Why? Why? Why? All I have are questions and it's starting to piss me off.

"Miss Givevra Molly Weasley," Dolores Umbridge reads out my name slowly like she was tasting it and I slink further down into my chair and let the cotton ball fall to the ground. "Are you ready for your evaluation?" she asks sharply as she looks up from her papers.

I gulp and nervously nod my head as I look at the table I'm currently sitting in front of. Umbridge, that Izador Rookwood character, Snape, and Lucius Malfoy are all sitting across from me with matching looks of indifference on their faces as I try not to break down and cry in front of them. I'm so nervous and the fact that Umbridge is currently holding my wand and studying it does not make me feel any easier...

"Why did you take my blood?" I ask in a whisper and she gives me a fake smile.

"To test it of course," she says sweetly like I was stupid. "Now let's see here..." she goes back to the paper in front of her and props it up to see better. "Age Sixteen, school year... sixth." Umbridge says with her fuzzy pink cardigan looking ridiculous next to the three men in black who are part of the new 'Department of Education'.

I flick a glance at my boyfriend's father, but he's steadily reading a piece of paper in front of him with a pair of glasses perched on the bridge of his sharp nose. I start playing with the bracelet his son gave me, trying to find some peace.

"Well, it looks like you have been doing fairly well in academics," she says as she flicks her eyes to paper in front of her once more. "Steady O's in most of your classes."

"She's fifth in her year," that Rookwood fellow points out and when he dark eyes find mine, I nervously look away.

"Indeed, and she's been on her house Quidditch team for two years." Umbridge says as she turns to another page. "Weasley," she says the name like she was pondering it's meaning. "Daughter of Arthur Weasley, currently in Azkaban for participating in a fight against the empire with the traitorous Order of the Phoenix."

I sit up straight when I hear that... Azakaban? My father is in Azkaban?

That makes my heart drop.

"And Molly Weasley," she says as she ticks her tongue. "Also in Azkaban for resisting questioning when officials were sent to her home. They had to break in to get her out."

"My home?" I say weakly and they all look up from their papers to stare at me. I lick my dry lips. "But, how did they get past the wards?"

"Nevermind that," Umbridge says as I bring a hand up so I can chew on my nails.

That freaking piece of paper! Draco said he gave it back... that's the only way they could have gotten my mother...Unless she let them in... but that doesn't make any sense. Umbridge said they had to break in. I pull my fingers from my mouth and start scratching my nails down my thighs so hard I think I might break through the denim.

"Sister to Charles Weasley, currently in Azkaban for treason. William Weasley, currently in Azkaban for treason. Fred Weasley and George Weasley, currently on a watch list for traitorous activity... at large," she adds, pausing for a moment before continuing. "Percy Weasley, arrested and in Azkaban for aiding the rebels in the fight at the Ministry of Magic. And lastly, Ronald Weasley, currently on the run with public enemy number one and wanted for treason against the state."

That's my entire family.

I can't even swallow that information properly.

I find my hands shaking and I look at Mr. Malfoy again. He's looking at me now, his silver eyes cold and unfeeling. I feel like I've been punched in the gut and I try to be optimistic. At least they aren't dead... that's a good thing to know.

Any news is better than no news, right?

No, not fucking right, but what else do I have to go off of?

"Tell me, Miss Weasley," Umbridge says in her sugary sweet voice as she folds her pudgy hands over the table. "Are you to be trusted?"

I don't say anything. I just swallow the lump in my throat and stare down at my hands.

"The Weasley's are a very old pureblooded family," Izador Rookwood says in his deep voice. "They're a powerful clan."

"Obviously full of blood traitors," Umbridge says as she motions to the folder in front of her and then to me. "I suggest we send her to Azkaban with the rest of her family and enroll her in the re-education program."

That doesn't sound good at all and I snap my eyes to them in a panic.

"What?" I say stupidly and Mr. Malfoy sighs as he takes off his glasses and folds them in his breast pocket.

"I don't think that will be necessary," he says and the others glance at him. "It would be a shame to waste her mind when there are only so many pure lines left."

_Waste her mind? _

What does that mean?

"Agreed," Rookwood says as his dark eyes take me in again. I look at Snape pleadingly.

He was a member of the Order. Is he really so evil?

"Miss Weasley," Snape says in his derisive voice. "Do you know where Harry Potter is?" he asks and I shake my head. I honestly don't, so it's not a lie. "Do you know how he left the castle?"

I shake my head again and look at my lap.

I have that golden compact in my pocket, I've taken to carrying it with me at all times, but right about now I wish it was safely tucked away in my trunk because it starts vibrating. I panic and look at them with wide eyes as it buzzes loudly, echoing off the high ceiling. Izador Rookwood raises a dark eyebrow.

"Do you need to get that?" he asks.

Hermione is calling me. Hermione, or my brother, or Harry. Oh my god, if these people knew. I quickly shake my head and pull it out of my pocket with shaking hands so I can turn it off. It falls from my grip and lands against the floor in my nervousness. It's still vibrating and making noise as my cheeks feel so

hot I fear I might catch on fire. I quickly fumble around and pick it up, pressing the button on the side to turn it off as they all stare at me.

I sigh in relief when I finally get it to shut up and when I look at them again, Umbridge has a distasteful look on her face and she makes a 'uh huh' sound before writing something down on the sheet in front of her.

I don't even want to know what she has to say about that.

"Do you have that under control?" Snape asks coldly and I nod my head as I stuff it back into my pocket and pray that the don't try to call again while I'm in here. "Good, now, as I was saying, do you have any information pertaining to the whereabouts and possible plans of Harry James Potter? We know how closely affiliated your family is with him."

"I don't know anything," I say in a mousy voice. I wish I was brave. I wish I was powerful and strong but I'm not so I just sound ridiculous and weak.

No one says anything for a while and I focus on the lump in my pocket. I hope they were able to leave me a message. I want to know how they are...

Then I feel it, softly at first and then more pronounced. It's the tingling feeling that Draco told me to watch out for for when someone was digging in my mind. I throw up the best shield I can and then I start thinking of a random memory to throw them off. If they knew that I had a compact that the three most wanted people in England used to communicate with me, I would probably be dead.

The first memory that comes to my mind is the fight Draco and I had gotten into with Ron and Harry in the hallway before dinner. Where curses were thrown and names were called and I ended up leaving with Draco, angry with Ron for his accusation of loyalty.

The presence leaves, and I snap my head up to the people at the table. They all still look passively annoyed, but Rookwood. His dark eyes look pleased and when I make eye contact with him, he smiles a little.

"I vote that she stays and takes the test," he says seriously. "We need more pureblooded girls and her line is quite unblemished despite the blood traitor activity of her family. She is still young and can be persuaded otherwise, I am sure."

"Good?" Umbridge seethes. She never really liked me and I'm sure she wants me out. "Her whole family is a pack of blood traitors and so is she."

"She is a hardly a blood traitor," Lucius Malfoy says with an eye roll. "In fact, I know she's the opposite. She has been staying at my Manor for a majority of the summer. My wife has taken her under her wing, shall we say."

Snape snaps his eyes to Malfoy, but doesn't say anything. He was in on the Order meetings. He knew that was a lie.

Why was he lying anyways?

Snape looks at me. "Miss Weasley, are you loyal to our Lord?" he asks, leveling me with calculating eyes.

I swallow the lump in my throat, unable to answer either way even though my mind is yelling at me to say no, to stand up and to declare my allegiance with Harry and the Order... but I'm not nearly as brave as I would like to pretend.

"Umm..."

That's all I say. I'm an idiot. I really am.

"She has already attempted to aid the Dark Lord her first year here," Lucius Malfoy breaks the silence as he holds up a page from the folder. I furrow my brows as they all turn to that page. The Chamber of Secrets, page five apparently. "She is dating my son and we all know where my allegiance falls," Lucius adds as he closes his folder and pushes it forward like dating Draco solved all the problems in the world. "She stays."

"She didn't answer the question," Umbridge says with a vicious snarl on her fat face. She glares at me. "Are you loyal to the dark lord? Do you renounce your family and your blood traitor ways for the betterment of our nation and the longevity of our empire!"

I might faint.

"Do you!"

"I..."

I was going to say no... but someone cut me off before I could.

"I think we're missing one key set of information here," Rookwood says as he pulls out a yellow piece of paper from his folder and I snap my mouth shut.

Crisis avoided, hopefully.

He hands it to Malfoy, who reads it and then he passes it to Snape who glances at it dismissively before handing it to Umbridge. She grabs it with her pudgy fingers and holds onto it with a death grip. I crane my neck, trying to see what it says. Why is that a key set of information? I'm not nearly so interesting... Umbridge's cheeks turn pink as her beady eyes run furiously back and forth over the page.

When she's finished reading it, she's gripping the paper so hard it tears.

There's a very long and very awkward amount of silence that falls through the hall, and then all three of them look at me.

I look at my knees.

I'm such a coward sometimes.

"Well, that settles that then," Umbridge says bitterly. "Odette!" she calls and the old woman with a hunched back comes into the room, wearing a purple cloak that shimmers oddly in the candle light. She was the one who took my blood at the beginning and I slide away from her. "Please take miss Weasley to take the test and have her fitted for a new uniform."

The old woman nods and walks towards me, but now I need to know what was on that yellow sheet of paper.

"What?" Is all I get out as I'm pulled from my seat. "Wait, what did that paper say?" I ask after clearing my throat.

"What do you think, Severus?" Umbrdige asks coldly and Snape eyes me for a few moments before nodding his head.

"It seems, Miss Weasley, that one of the prefects from your grade, Miss Felicia Hart," I nod my head. I know her. She's a quiet muggle born in my class that rarely says two words. "Has failed her evaluation."

How could she possibly fail? She is first in our year?

And that has nothing to do with my question!

"And considering your academic achievements, I would say it is quite prudent to offer you the post," he says and I bite my nails again. Lucius raises his eyebrows at it, so I quickly put my hand down. "But, you will have to complete your testing first to make sure."

I don't say anything, I don't move, and I barely breath until that old woman named Odette starts pulling me again.

"Follow me, dear," she says as she pulls me out of my seat. I look at the table of people once more with my mouth hanging open. I really don't know what to say and when my eyes slide to that Rookwood fellow, he raises his brows and smiles.

I don't like him.

I follow Odette to another room like a zombie. Ten other girls from my grade are already seated, looking nervous and shaken like me.

I see Luna towards the back and I give her a sad smile before Odette pushes my shoulder.

What a pushy bitch.

"Take a seat. We'll start your test in a moment," she says as she hands me my wand. I get stuck sitting at one of the desks in the front and I try not to cry like a baby.

There's a blank piece of parchment before me and a quill in an ancient looking inkwell in the right hand corner.

"Test," I say flatly and she nods her head.

We have to sit in complete silence as the time clicks slowly by. I twist in my seat and try to spot Luna again, but I can't seem to get her attention. She's too busy scribbling something down on the desk to look up and I glare at her before facing the front of the room again. The room fills up with more girls from my grade and when Ivy Parkinson comes, she spots me and takes a seat right by mine.

"How did it go?" she whispers only to get shushed by Odette and the other old woman in the room.

I don't say anything, I just sit forward and grip the quill in my fingers so hard it hurts.

When every girl from my grade is settled in the room, Odette locks the door and glances at the clock.

"You will have two hours to take the written exam," she says in a hoarse voice. "Starting... now," she says and I glance down at the empty sheet of paper in front of me.

A charms question pops up, and I look at Odette before picking up the quill and writing down the answer.

I have no idea what would happen if someone scored badly on this test, so I actually put my all into it, trying to do my best.

I know I don't want that re-education crap.

It takes me two hours to finish the written exam and then another hour of wand work. By the end of it I'm such a nervous wreck, worried about everything... my family... Harry... the wizarding world in general... that I'm shaking and pale by the time Odette collects our tests.

"You'll get your grades and your new class schedule by tomorrow," she says as she takes a clip board from the front desk. "Now, when I call your name. I want you to come forward to receive your new uniforms. You'll be sorted together with your new roommates," she says as she flicks her eyes around the room. "And you will receive a map of your new dorms where you'll be staying."

"Now," she says as she looks at the list. "I need these girls to follow me into the adjacent room," she says and I start chewing on my nails against like a dolt. "Astoria Greengrass, Ivy Parkinson, Helen Macnair, Luna Lovegood, Romilda Vane, Ginevra Weasley..." My ears perk up when I hear my name and I stand from my seat with my wand gripped in my hand as she lists off a few more names.

I follow the other girls towards Odette and once we're all gathered she makes us follow her into a different room. I grab Luna right away and hang towards the back.

"Are you okay?" I whisper as I hook her arm in my own. I noticed one thing about my new dorm mates... we're all purebloods.

"I'm fine," she says and she blinks a few times. Even Luna in all her dazed off dreaminess must realize the seriousness of this situation.

"They told me that my whole family was in Azkaban," I say as I try to blink back tears. "Do you think they're going to hurt them?" I question in a small voice.

"I don't know," she says, suddenly serious. "My father is there too, for printing negative things about the new regime. But Theo says... "

"Ginevra Weasley," my name is called again and I snap my eyes towards Odette. "Please come here for your measurements."

I nod my head and squeeze Luna's arm before walking towards that horrid woman.

She measured me and pulled out a newly folded uniform from a rather large cabinet along the wall and made me change into it behind a changing screen. There's a mirror back here and I glance at my tired looking expression before pealing out of my clothes and carefully folding them on one of the wooden chairs, careful to protect the golden compact.

The uniform is similar to Draco's. All black. I shimmy into black tights and pull on a black pencil skirt over them. After I zip that up, I button up the black shirt and then slide the black jumper over my chest. Then I put on the black tie. The shoes she handed me are a modest size two inch heel and I slip them on my feet and buckle them slowly. I feel like this is the outfit I'm meant to die in. It's depressing. There are silver studs along the shoulders of the jumper with the Dark Mark etched into them and when I look at myself in the mirror, I almost start crying.

_Traitor._

Odette walks around the curtain until she's standing right behind me, eyeing my reflection in the mirror.

"Your uniform might change a little bit if you make prefect after we review your test," she says as she pulls hair behind my shoulders to get a better look. "You'll get a jacket if you qualify."

"Oh," is all I say stupidly. I look at myself in the mirror again.

I look like a traitor.

I want to run away, but with my whole family in jail... where is there to run to?

I should have fucking gone with Harry.

She puts a cobalt blue arm band around my upper arm and I give it an odd look as she secures it with magic. "What is that?" I ask with a dry throat.

"Blood status bands, dear," she says and I glare at it.

Blood status bands, like the blood status ribbons we had to wear at Folk Hills... as blue as our blood.

I feel like I'm going to be sick.

"Now," she says as she fills out some form from her clipboard as I stare at myself in the mirror, fingering the silver buttons on my shoulders. "Here is a copy of your new dorm room," she says a she hands me a map. I look it over dismissively, not really seeing anything as I focus on this stupid uniform. "You'll move in by the end of the night."

I feel dirty in it.

I want to take it off.

"It looks like your parents Gringotts account has been frozen and turned over to the state," she says and I snap my eyes towards hers.

"What?" I say as she continues to fill out the form.

"You're going to have to be apart of our work study program to afford your uniform and schooling," she says and I look at her like an idiot. "Mrs. Umbridge is the head of the girls wing," she adds. "You'll work under her in a building outside of the castle on your down time. I'll have Carrie show you the building after this... We'll also have to put a tracker on your ankle because you'll be outside of the castle."

A tracker? Like Neville? What if I find a way to leave or to save my parents? They'll always be able to find me!

"But..." I trail off. Hogwarts never had tuition and this uniform can't cost this much. I have my own money... I can save myself from this. "Wait, what?" I say as I pull on the sweater uncomfortably. I don't want to be under that woman in any odd building off the grounds. She hates me! "What does work study mean?"

"It means," she says as she flicks her cold eyes to mine. "That you'll have to work so you can stay in school. We're building an empire and the Dark Lord must stimulate the economy. The information will be sent to you later, once your classes are scheduled."

"Wait," I say as I shake my head. "Wait, I have money," I say as I take a step forward and I put my hand on my chest so I can seem genuine. "How much will it cost?"

"I told you that your parents account is frozen..."

"I have my own account," I tell her sharply. "That's not frozen, is it?" I ask in a panic and she furrows her brows at me.

"Only traitors to the nation..."

"So I have my money still. I can pay for this. I don't need to be sent with Umbridge or anywhere off the grounds. I can pay this," I tell her as I take her quill and I start writing my account number down on the paper. "I can afford this," I say with my hands shaking as I write out every number carefully. "I have money," I admit again.

"Well," she says sharply as she takes the form away from me. "We'll see then. We'll get back to you," she says.

I sigh and nod my head.

I'm dismissed after that, and I gather all my old clothes in my hands before leaving the room. I see Luna getting measured on my way out and I wait outside in the hallway for her to come out so we can talk.

I send a look around, and when I realize that I'm alone, I put my pile of clothes on the ground and I dig through my jeans until I find that compact. Maybe they left me a message. I carefully open it, and I see Hermione's frozen face covered in ash. I hesitate a second and look over my shoulder before tapping the mirror.

It instantly comes to life.

"Ginny," the recording is breathless and she looks like she's on the verge of tears. "We went to the Burrow, but it had been torn down. We have no idea what happened to your parents..." I sigh sadly when I realize I know more than they do. "Everything is gone," she says and I feel my eyes welling up with tears as I think of my childhood home. "It looks like it's been burnt to the ground. I can't tell you what happened or how the Death Eaters got past your wards, but I thought you should know. Ginny, have Draco help you leave the castle. You must-"

Someone snaps the compact shut from behind me, and I gasp in surprise as Draco glares down at me.

"If anyone else heard that, you would be dead," he says coldly. He takes the compact away from me and places it in his pocket. "Use your head, Ginny," he says when I finally face him.

When he sees my tear stained face he furrows his brows.

"How did it go?" he asks as I lean against the wall and I put my hand on my forehead. "You're sad?" he says as he eyes me. "It is a little intense," he adds and I nod my head.

"My home is gone," I say in a sad whisper. "Did you hear what Hemione said? She said it was burned to the ground. My whole family is in Azkaban right now," I say with a sob and he pulls me to him, tucking my head under his chin.

"Why didn't they make you a prefect?" he snaps as he looks over my uniform.

"They said I had to take the test first," I admit in a whisper against his chest. "But I don't understand. Felicia is first in our grade. How could she fail her evaluation?" I think out loud.

"She's a mudblood," Draco says like it was known. "She wasn't going to pass anyways."

I shoot him a look as I pull back. "Why do you say things like that?" I ask and he raises an eyebrow.

"What?"

"Why do you say words like mudblood?"

He doesn't answer, he just stares at me and I notice that he's wearing his new uniform as well, with a leather strap across his chest that holds his wand. He looks so official... so intimidating. The only color on him is the blue armband declaring his blood status.

"Let's go to my room," he says as he brushes his fingers over my neck.

"No, I..." I trail off. I really don't want to go back to my room honestly since they assigned me a new one.

"You what?" he asks flatly as his sharp eyes take me in.

My lower lip starts to tremble.

"What are you doing?" he snaps and I bring my hand up to wipe away tears.

"My parents," is all I get out and he sighs loudly before pulling me to him and tucking me against his chest again.

"It's alright," he says gently. The silver buttons press into my ears and it hurts.

"No it's not, it's probably my fault! I should have found that stupid password. And... and they said I'd have to be a part of a stupid work study program. I don't want to be under Umbrdige. They said I would have to work for her in a building outside of the castle."

"That's foolish." he says with an eye roll and I glare at him through my tears.

"My parents are in Azkaban and he took whatever small amount was in their gringotts account!" I scream and he flinches before looking around the hallway to make sure others aren't listening.

"I'll pay for it," he scoffs at me after he's sure no one is listening. "Why are you letting this bother you? You know I wouldn't let you do that stupid work study thing."

My family is in Azkaban... and he's asking me that question.

"I gave them my account number," I say with my lower lip trembling. "I told them I would pay for it..."

"Don't be stupid," he says and I start sobbing.

I feel nervous and my stomach is turning in knots and I have no idea what I should do with myself.

"Don't cry," he says, pulling me to him again and kissing the top of my head. "I know how you must feel right now," he says against my hair as I pull him to me. I hope everyone is okay.. .I hope they're being treated well and I clench my eyes shut, letting more tears fall because I know that's probably not happening. "Let me take care of things," he says in a whisper. "As long as you're with me, things will be okay." he says. "I told you this, Gin. Don't be silly."

He pulls me back and puts his hands on my face, looking deeply into my eyes.

"Right?" he says as he studies my face.

I know I look horrid right now. There's snot dripping from my nose and over my lips, but I don't care.

"Gin," he says as he reaches into his pocket and he pulls out a handkerchief. He hands it to me and I step back so I can wipe off my face. "You believe me?" he asks as I try not to throw up. "That you're fine as long as you're mine?"

"Yeah..." I whisper in a hoarse voice because I don't know what else to say.

"I can't hear you," he says gently, putting his hand on my my arm.

I look at his uniform jacket, with the silver buttons. The dark mark is there, mocking me.

"Yes," I say, glancing up at him and letting one more tear slip. "Yes, I believe you."

"Good," he says, giving me a pleased smile. "Come," he says as he takes my hand and starts leading me towards his room.

"Draco," I say as we walk. "Could you help my parents?"

I'm tired of hearing people tell me Draco's a man of influence. I would really like him to live up to that.

"I can't do much right now, babe," he says when we reach his room and he opens the door for me. "I don't want you to think on it too much," he says as he walks me towards his bed. "There's nothing we can do."

"But Draco..." I start crying again.

I feel like an idiot. A useless idiot, but I don't know what else to do.

"Lay down," he says as he starts unbuttoning his jacket. "Do as I say," he says sharply and I nod my head.

I slip off my shoes and crawl in the bed. Draco puts his jacket over the back of his chair and crawls in behind me.

"You never have to worry," he says as he wraps his arms around me. "Just do as I say. Always do what I say and things will turn out fine."

He waits for me to calm down and stop crying and once the pain in my chest starts to fade I take a short nap. After dinner, he takes my trunk and helps me carry it to my new dorm room where all my roommates are already settled on their claimed beds.

He puts my things down by the only empty bed left in the room and the other girls leave as he shoots them a look. Even Romilda and Luna follow suit and I sigh tiredly before walking over to the window and crossing my arms.

There are bars on the windows.

It worries me and I try not to cry again as I look out at the sky.

It's impossibly sunny considering this is one of the worst days of my life.

"It's a lovely day," Draco pulls the thought from my mind as he walks up behind me and places his hand on the window frame, caging me against it.

I see my reflection in the glass, behind the bars with Draco's lips against my hair. I let a few more tears slip as he kisses my temple.

"I'll call on you later," he says as he squeezes my hip. "Stay here with your new room mates for the night," he says gently and I nod my head because there's no point in saying anything else. "I'll see you later," he says as then he tilts my chin towards his so he can place a kiss against my lips.

"Bye," I say softly and he stares at me for a few moments before he walks off.

Once he leaves, I realize a moment too late that he took the golden compact with him.

* * *

Things had changed at Hogwarts completely. When Rookwood said that there would be no houses dividing the students of hogwarts, that had been a lie. Now we're divided by gender and blood status. We no longer have co-ed dorms. Instead, all the pureblooded girls of all ages are placed in the tower and the boys are down in the slytherin dungeons. Half bloods girls are in the hufflepuff dorms and half blood boys are in ravenclaw... Muggle borns... They're in an odd building by the forbidden forest that was built just to house them.

I have no idea what it looks like on the inside, but I hear that it's disgusting there.

I wouldn't know though, I don't have any classes with muggle borns. I have no idea what classes they're taking or what they're learning about.

It makes me sad to think of it and everything makes me sad so I have to choose my poison wisely or I fear one day I will never wake up from my depression.

I'm sitting in our Magical Genetics class with Ivy Parkinson. She's one of my new roommates and she's taken to being my shadow now more than ever.

That's another thing, all the classes are changed as well with darker subjects. Boys and girls are separate again and I have no idea what the benefit of that is.

"Now," Carrow, one of the newly appointed professors points his wand at the chalk board where a DNA strand is drawn with yellow chalk. "Magic is not something you can just take," he says as he points to a significant strand highlighted in green chalk. "It's in our DNA. Some stronger than others," he adds as he looks around the room.

I put my chin in my hands and try to pay attention.

We're learning about the female witches anatomy and genetic make up and how certain curses and potions can effect the magical balance within. I'm trying to pay attention because I've heard rumors that the Carrows use unforgivables as punishments for wayward students. It seems so improbable, but in this new world, I would not doubt it.

"You can't change the magic in a person's DNA, but you can manipulate it," he says as he walks around the classroom to make sure people are taking notes. I quickly put my quill to paper as he passes.

"Magic is a recessive gene," he says as he taps Astoria's desk with his long fingers. "That is why we must keep the blood lines pure. The more pure the blood line, the stronger the magic in the DNA," he says, pointing to the strand on the board once more. "But different curses can manipulate it. For instance, the Boligarious Curse will snap the spinal chord and paralyze it's victim beyond magical repair, but the Magic within the body needs to be balanced, and while that wizard or witch may be confined to a wheel chair or walking charms..."

Draco's grandfather...

"Other magical senses will be heightened, as is the case with all curses besides the three unforgivables. Many magical people who have fallen victim to that curse are very successful in mind reading and wandless magic. That is why it is a curse rarely used. The magic actually has some benefits. But you must remember that all magic has a balance."

I write all that down as I think of Draco and his family.

"Blood curses run even deeper," he says and I write that down as well as he walks about the room again. "It can take generations to manifest itself in a person. In 1593 a wizard by the name of Francis Duddley cursed the Galey family line so that every first son born would parish by the time he reached eleven. It took three hundred years for the magic to balance itself out. In 1854 the curse was broken by a descendant of the Galey family: Edmund the Heretic."

A few girls gasp at the name. We all know him from history. He was called the Heretic because he roused a group of witches and wizards to go through small towns and burn churches through out Europe. They would do it on Sunday mornings... when the whole congregation was still inside. He killed thousands of muggles...

He walks by Luna's desk by the front and he looks down at her notes.

He makes a face and snaps the paper away from her. Showing her doodle of a horse to the whole class. "This is not note taking," he says hatefully and Luna blushes red. "I don't recall talking about ways to draw a fucking horse," he says and I cover my mouth with my hand because I have _never_ heard a professor cuss in a classroom, or anywhere else for that matter.

I guess he was in Azkaban for seventeen years... and a little rough around the edges.

Not that that makes it any better.

He glares at Luna.

"Go to the office," he says coldly and she nods her head quickly before gathering all of her things and running out of the room.

God, I hope she's okay.

"Now, back on track," he says as he tears up the picture and throws it in the rubbish bin. "Where was I... oh, right..." He starts walking again, like he didn't just cuss in front of all of us and send one of his students running. "We all know him, of course. He went on to become one of the greatest Dark Wizards of all time, second only to our Great Lord."

I try not to gag on those words.

"The curse from centuries ago came around full circle in Edmund the Heretic, making him a very powerful wizard. Even his blood had special magical components that he used in many ground breaking potions..."

The speaker beeps and Carrow falls silent as a voice echoes over the loud speaker.

It's not Snape... it's a woman.

"Will all pureblooded girls sixteen and older please report to the Great Hall. Thank you."

It beeps again and we all look at each other.

That's everyone in this freaking class and Carrow sighs.

"We'll continue this next time," he says as we all start gathering our things.

When we get to the hall, Ivy flanks herself beside me with Astoria on the other side. They're like boring more bitchy versions of their older sisters and I sigh as they start talking to each other... around me of course.

"What do you think they want?" I ask Ivy once we walk into the great hall after she's done telling Astoria about what she wants for her birthday. They should be a little more worried about this... but I find that they're never worried about anything. Their family isn't in danger of being executed, their boyfriends don't follow their every move, and they actually like these new uniforms.

It makes me want to jump off a cliff.

Every pureblooded girl above the age of fifteen had been summoned to the hall and I cross my arms as we walks towards Pansy and Daphne. I like them much better than the girls my age.

"Hey Gin," Daphne grins at me.

I don't think I've smiled in a week.

"Why are you always looking so depressed?" she asks as she hugs me.

I push her back.

"Daphne, shut up," Pansy snaps and then she looks at me. She knows why I'm always depressed.

Before she can say anything else, a tall woman with yellow hair stands up on the teacher's stage and puts her wand to her neck so it will echo over the hall.

"Ladies, I know you're all wondering why you're here."

"Oh, very much indeed," Daphne says with a smile. She gets glared at, but it doesn't seem to bother her.

"Now, you have all been excelling in your classes from which we are all proud," she says as she looks at all of us. I glance at Pansy, but she's watching the woman closely with her eyes narrowed slightly.

"And you all should know the importance of pureblooded girls in our society," she says and I look at my shoes when her cold eyes flick to mine. "In fact, the pureblooded woman is the most important part of our society," she says and I roll my eyes. "Without pureblooded girls, there would be no pureblooded boys to fight for our cause."

I swallow hard and clench my jaw shut tight.

"We have a very important job," she says as she starts pacing in front of us. "That Dark Lord has made it known that he expects great unions from all the major houses." I don't know what that means but it's just another long thing to add to the list of bullshit I have to worry about. "And as an added bonus, the families of such unions will receive money and tax breaks for every child born. Now, you are all so young," she says as she looks around. "But we are a dying race and soon you will be called upon to do your duty to our world."

"Will they be arranged?" Someone blurts out. I look over in surprise at Hannah Abbot, her strawberry blonde hair wild around her face.

"Yes... they will..."

The woman doesn't finish that sentence because the hall erupts with voices from every unhappy girl in the room.

"I have a boyfriend!" someone ends up shouting from the back.

"It does not matter," She yells over the crowd. "You will be chosen on intelligence and genetics that fit each profile to perfection," she says and I furrow my brows. "There aren't many of us purebloods left, we must make sure that the lines stay clean and mutation free."

Ew.

"Now, you will form three single file lines in front of the tables over here," she says, motioning to the tables where three girls are sitting in front of stacks of folders. "You'll be handed a folder full of your potential suitors and you can chose to meet the ones whom you seem fit."

More roars from the crowd. Draco has influence, right? He might be in my folder and obviously I could just chose him until this all blows over.

If it ever does.

I hope to god Harry comes through for us all.

"The Dark Lord is not heartless," she says and I actually let out a laugh. Pansy shoot me a look but I ignore it. "He knows the fantasies of young girls are important so he will make it easier for everyone. You have the choice over who you pick. If you have not chosen a proper suitor by your twentieth birthday, you will have one chosen for you, but rest assured you will have many promising prospects."

After another short speech on the importance of blood status, we divide into three lines. Since my last name is at the end of the alphabet, I'm in the third line by Romilda Vane, who has jumped straight into this whole pureblooded crap ever since she got that blue armband.

"Who do you think will be in your folder?" she asks in excitement as she curls on her toes. "Oh, I hope I get someone good... someone famous!" she says with a squeal and I glare at her. "Of course, Draco is probably number one on your list," she adds as she twirls a dark curl around her finger thoughtfully. "I'm sure that's a union that most people would like to see, despite the blood traitor status of your family."

"Shut up," I snap and she looks at me in surprise. "What about Harry?" I hiss. I feel like I should remind her she had a hopeless crush on him last year. "He is still out there, still fighting for our freedom."

"Not our freedom," she says as she taps her armband. "We have more freedom now in our rightful place than what we ever had before."

I sneer at her.

"Rightful place?" I hiss and she nods her head.

Then it hits me, why a girl like Romilda would like this... why she would accept it when she was just as much a Gryffindor as I am... It made her feel special... It made her feel good to be on the top of the blood ladder.

"What about Felicia?" I whisper. Felicia was her best friend in our house... the quiet, fiercely smart muggle born.

"What about her?" she asks and I make a face.

"Do you know how she is or what she's doing in that weird building by the forest?" I ask as our line moves forward. "I thought she was your best friend."

"Well... I can't help it if my magic is more powerful than hers," she says, obviously learning that from our class with Carrow. "We have to accept our different roles in society, Ginny, or the whole thing will crumble."

"You're not more powerful than she is. You can't even do a proper heating charm," I seethe. All my anger and resentment is pouring out of me now. All towards Romlida Vane because she's here and she's weak with her wand and it's easy. I realize I'm no better than anyone in this room, but I don't care. "You're stupid and fickle," I say through clenched teeth. "And an incompetent witch if there ever was one and you deserve to be in that muggle born building in by the forest!"

I shouted that last part and everything went silent as everyone stopped what they were doing to look at me. Romilda's face nearly turned purple in embarrassment and when I found Pansy's eyes, she was giving me a proud look, like she was pleased by what I had said. I was too pissed off to care and when I realized we were by the table, I stepped ahead of Romilda and looked at the mousey woman who had her jaw slightly open in surprise as she stared at me.

"My name is Weasley," I tell her hotly as the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end because I know everyone is staring at me still. "Give me my damn folder," I say and someone laughs. It sounds like Daphne and ignore it as the girl looks down at her name sheet so she can see where my folder is located.

"Weasley," she repeats in a small voice and I jerk my head up and down. "Weasley...Weasley... Oh, it looks like you don't have a folder."

Thank God. I nearly sigh in relief until she keeps on talking.

"It looks like you are a special request," she says, looking over the paper with bug like eyes.

"What?" I state dryly as I put my palms flat on the table.

"Yes, a special request. It says I'm to send you to Mr. Rookwood's office."

"What?" I say again because I can't say anything else. "What does special request mean?"

"It means," she says uncomfortably. I can hear girls giggling behind me as they look through their folders and I narrow my eyes. "That someone put in a special request to have you."

"Who did?' I question harshly and she flinches.

"You have to meet with Mr. Rookwood," she says. "His office is on the third floor by the head master's suite."

I'm too angry to bother with anyone else and I stomp all the way to his office, ignoring everything around me as I pound on his door. It opens a few moments later and he smiles at me.

"Who requested me?" I ask before I even sit down and Rookwood raises his eyebrows as he looks me over.

"Please, Mrs. Weasley," he says. "Take a seat."

I clench my jaw and walks towards the chair, letting my bag thump to the floor as I sit in the leather chair.

"Well?" I say. I'm tired, tired and pissed and over it all and I don't care to be a coward anymore. "Who is it?"

"I'm sorry," he says as he takes a seat behind his desk and he puts his hands on the table. "Let's try this again. You are a student," he says motioning to me. "And I'm the authoritative adult in this situation. Let's show a little more respect, shall we?"

I swallow hard and nod my head. He is a Death Eater, after all. I don't want to do something that would get me in trouble... or anyone else that I love.

"Good," he says pleasantly as he folds his hands together on the desk. "Now, you and I have to talk."

"Okay," I say uncomfortably as I pull the sweater sleeves over my hands and I cross my arms.

"The blood sample we took from you for your evaluation possessed very potent magical capabilities," he says and I frown. "It was quite a find," he adds.

I don't say anything, I just stare at him as he stares at me.

It gets weird so I look away.

"Now, let's talk about your marriage contract," he says and my heart jumps to my throat. "You, Miss Weasley, are one very lucky girl."

"What?" I whisper, my anger and courage is gone as I uncross my arms. The way he's looking at me doesn't make me feel very lucky.

He pulls a piece of parchment from a suitcase by his chair and he looks it over with his sharp eyes as my stomach ties itself in knots.

"You will never want for anything," he says as his eyes scan the paper. "All that will be required from you will be a monthly blood donation and the eventual development of pureblooded offspring."

_Offspring. _

I'm going to vomit.

I bring my hand up to my mouth as he continues.

"You will not have a demanding head of house," he says and the way he said 'head of house' really makes me want to barf. "You are allowed to finish your schooling and when you turn seventeen you shall receive a weekly allowance from your benefactor's estate." I lean forward a bit. I really do think I'm going to lose my lunch. "After you graduate, the bonding ritual will be completed and you will then be moved to a secluded estate in Wales where you will be well protected.

Well protected... secluded... what?

"Your free time will be used as you see fit and the only duties involving your husband will be in the marital bed." I gag a little and he pauses before continuing. "There will be no other requirement of you."

I swallow the bile in my throat. He actually said marital bed...

"Now, I know you are a young girl and most young girls have a certain romanticized idea pertaining to marriage and bonding. I will let you know that your benefactor does not expect you to love him, nor does he expect you to have any kind of relationship outside of what is required of you. But he does expect your respect. He will be your head of house and he will expect your obedience. He is a very busy, very important, and very powerful wizard. He cannot be troubled with the fantasies or dramas of a little girl."

"But," I lick my dry lips as I bring my hand down. "But the woman in the great hall said we could choose our suitor. She said we had choices..." I blink back tears. "This is not fair."

"Yours is a special circumstance," he says and then his eyes soften for a millisecond when he realizes I'm going to start crying. So he's not totally heartless. "Many young woman would kill to be in your shoes," he adds like that would help and I furrow my brows.

"Who is it?" I ask carefully and he shakes his head.

"That's classified information," he says and I make a face. "Information that will be revealed to you upon your graduation. It is safer for everyone if no one knows for the time being."

Maybe it is Draco... maybe in some twist of fate he was able to work this out. He does have a lot of money, he could buy this special request ridiculousness. If this is his idea of a joke, I'm going to kill him.

"Is he..." I try to think of a good way to word this. "Is he like... is he around my age?" I sound so impossibly young and it's disgusting to me, but perhaps it will soften Rookwood up a bit.

Rookwood eyes me for a few long moments before glancing down at his papers. "Your benefactor is very old," he says and my heart drops again as I hang my head. "But do not let that bother you," he says as I start sniffing because I'm crying full force now and my breathing is getting heavier "I believe you will be surprised by what you find waiting for you on your wedding night."

"I have a boyfriend," I say quickly in a last ditch attempt to stop all of this craziness.

"I would suggest breaking up with him sooner rather than later then," he says like it was unimportant and I start seeing black little dots in front of my eyes.

I might have a panic attack.

I dig into my bag to take out my anti-panic pills. They're almost all gone and I take two of them as Rookwood eyes me critically.

"Can I say no?" I ask in a shaky voice after I swallow the pills.

He looks me square in the eyes. "You can not say no to this man," he says seriously, tapping his finger against the paper. After a few moments, he sits back with a sigh. "I would suggest focusing on your class work and keeping a relatively low profile," he says gently. "A positive, low profile," he adds. "Trust me on this," he says darkly. "You do not want to disappoint this person," he says, tapping the paper again and it sends a chill down my spine. "You may go now," he says lightly and I just sit there for a few moments, staring at him like a fool.

"Do you have any other questions?" he asks because I haven't moved yet and I shake my head. "Okay, well, goodbye then, Miss Weasley."

"Yeah," I say as I pick up my bag and start walking towards the door.

"Oh, and Ginevra," he says when I reach the door and I look over my shoulder reluctantly.

"Yes?"

"The monthly blood donations will start in two weeks."

"It's not really a donation if I don't have a choice, is it?" I mutter but before he can answer, I leave.

Classes are over for the day, and I walk straight towards Draco's room so I can talk to him. I have to leave this fucking castle. I say his password and find him at his writing desk, composing a letter.

"I have to leave," I say as I drop my bag and tug on my hair. "I have to leave this castle."

"What are you talking about?" he says with a sigh, never once looking up from his writing.

"All the pureblooded girls had to go to the great hall to get information on suitors," I say quickly to his back because he won't fucking turn around. "And I didn't get a folder, they told me I was a special request and they sent me to Rookwood's office."

I inhale deeply. He keeps writing.

"He told me that I have to marry this random person I don't even know when I graduate," I say breathlessly because I'm panicking. "He wouldn't tell me who it is. He says its classified information, but he's old and powerful and I have to give him babies and blood and he actually said something about duties in the marital bed! They expect me to sleep with this creepy random old man!"

"That's not going to happen," Draco scoffs and I stomp over to him and grab his damn quill. He gives me an irritated look and snatches it right back.

"He said it would," I say in exasperation. "He said it didn't matter if I wanted it or not. That it didn't matter if I had a boyfriend. I would have to do it!"

"Stop shouting at me," he snaps as he goes back to his letter and I grip his shoulder and push him so he'll be forced to look at me.

He narrows his eyes in annoyance.

"This is serious, Draco!" I yell as I stomp my foot. "I don't want to marry an old Death Eater!"

"You won't be marrying anyone," he says as he carefully sets his quill on the table and he stands up so he's towering over me.

"But, he said-"

"I don't give a fuck what _he_ said," he snaps nastily and I raise my brows at it. "You aren't marring anyone else. You _can't_ marry anyone because you're already married."

I snap my mouth shut.

"What?"

I'm positive I heard that wrong.

"You can't get married when you graduate," he says a little more gently as he brings a hand up to brush hair away from my face. "It's impossible for you to be bonded to anyone else because you're already bonded... You're already married to _me_."

I stare at him for a insanely long amount of time and after all of that the only thing I can come up with to say is: "Uh, what?"

Uh, what.

That pretty much sums up my whole fucking year so far.


	11. Chapter 11

"Uh, what?"

Draco raises his brows. "What part of that didn't you understand?" he asks flatly and I push him back.

"What did you mean by that? What do you mean _we're married_?" I ask in a panic and he rolls his eyes like I was being foolish. "We're not married. I'm only sixteen! I think I would have remembered something like that..." I trail off as I remember the fidelity spell I agreed to, how the red lines bound our hands together. I saw it again when we were... _doing it_ for the first time...

Bonded together with magic... Bonded... Marriage...

"No," I say as I shake my head because it can't be true. He wouldn't do that to me. "No , you didn't."

"It's old magic," he says as he leans against his writing desk and crosses his arms. "Old magic that you agreed to, I would like to point out," he says and I furrow my brows. "When we slept together, it consummated the agreement and you accepted an heirloom from my family, cementing the relationship and solidifying your willingness to enter my family," he says, nodding to the bracelet. I start messing with the clasp again, trying to take it off.

"But, I didn't agree to all that!" I yell, anger boiling up in my insides as I try to take off his damn family heirloom. "If I would have known, I wouldn't have done it!"

"Precisely why I didn't tell you," he says sharply. "But, aren't you glad that I went ahead and did it now? You will not have to marry some old 'creepy death eater' and you won't give your blood to anyone either. I forbid it as your head of house," he says and I can feel my insides turning. "I saved you from a fate you can't even imagine."

"Why would you do all of this?" I ask. "How did you know?"

"I know a lot of things," he scoffs and I frown.

"But..." I stumble over my words and then I let my hands drop to my sides. "Wait, but you did all of this over the summer," I say, trying to work it out in my head. I honestly can't wrap my head around this properly. "That means you knew this was all going to happen? You knew that the Death Eaters would take over the country... You knew that they would do this new marriage law! You knew they would change Hogwarts... You knew and never told me!" I shout. Then I think of every conversation we ever had. "YOU LIED TO ME!" I scream like a mad person. I'm so loud I fear I might start shaking the windows. "You said you didn't believe Harry!"

He doesn't seem very bothered by this whole conversation and it's really starting to piss me off. He's the only boy I've ever loved and his betrayal is hurting me deeply... and he doesn't even care.

"You told me you didn't believe that Dark Lord was back! You lied right to my face if you knew all of this!"

"Calm down," he says and I sneer.

"Don't tell me to calm down!" I think of the password I gave to him to get into my house and the fact that I was sure he never gave it back. Did he lie about that? Did he give the Death Eaters the password so they could get to my parents? Why would he do all of that?

Doesn't he love me?

"What happened to the password I gave you?" I ask and he raises an eyebrow.

"What?" he asks and I glare.

"The ward password I gave you so you could get into my house. What did you do with it?"

"I told you I gave it back-"

"You're liar!" I yell again. I take out my wand and point it at him, shouting that mind reading spell he would use on me when he was training me to shield my thoughts.

I only get to see a glimpse of him in a dark cloak outside of his Manor before he pulls me out of his mind.

"How dare you," he says in a deadly whisper as he walks towards me and he snatches my wand.

Finally, some emotion from him.

"You read my mind all the time," I scoff. "Don't tell me that pissed you off."

I remember the golden compact that he still has and I push him to the side so I can go through the drawers on his writing desk.

I want it now.

I can't trust anyone anymore.

"I swear to god, Draco, if you're the reason why my mother is in Azkaban... why my house is destroyed... I swear, I will never forgive you,"

I pull out each drawer of the writing desk roughly and let them slam on the ground. One wooden drawer even breaks by the impact, but I don't care. I'm too angry to care.

When I find nothing of importance in his writing desk I move to the nightstand, he follows.

"I wouldn't do that," he says gently as I pull the drawer out so far that it smacks against the ground again. "I did everything to keep you safe, to keep you mine..."

"Why?" I hiss as I push around papers and quills. "You didn't need to keep me safe! You should have told me not to come back to Hogwarts! If that's the case, then you should have just let me leave with Harry."

He's silent for a moment and then he narrows his eyes. "You wouldn't be safe with him. He's wanted dead or alive... anyone with him is free game and your family is a target. You know that, Ginny. You're safer here, with me."

I shake my head.

"I love you," he says and I scoff again. Nothing is in the nightstand so I move to his dresser. "You're special, Ginny, but you were mine by right," he says and I glance at him over my shoulder before opening another drawer. "I told you that story of our family history," he says and I roll my eyes. "When you were born, it broke that curse, but the promise was still there," he says and I furrow my brows as I pull out his shirts and let them litter the floor. "I've known since I was little that you were promised to me, all I had to do was claim you. I wasn't going to," he says. "But I decided that I wanted you, and now no one else can have you. You were mine since birth."

"Where's my compact?" I hiss because I don't care to listen to him.

"Stop moving and let's talk about this."

"Why?" I ask as I turn on him. "So you can talk me out of it, change the subject, and manipulate me into believing a lie?"

Oh my God.

What if he's a Death Eater?

I recall him coming to my room at night during the summer in black clothing and smelling of smoke... He lies about everything... but why would he help Harry leave the castle if that was the case? He said he only does things that benefit him. What did he get for that?

"Ginny," he says flatly as he walks up to me and he grabs my arms. "You love me," he says as he searches my eyes. "And I love you. I know I should have told you everything from the beginning, but you would have ran away from me," he says gently and I narrow my eyes again. I grab my wand from him and stuff it in my pocket. "I saved you from being sold off as property to someone else. You should be grateful that I would do that for you."

Really?

I push his chest so he's no longer touching me.

"Listen to me," he hisses as I grab my bag to leave the room. I can not be around him right now. "You need to be introduced for it to be official in society," he says as I walk towards the door. "But you are my wife, Ginny," he says harshly because he's angry with me. "And I am your head of house and you will listen to me."

"Fuck you," I snap and his eyes narrow. "I want to break up."

If he knew all of this, he could have warned my family some how... he could have done a lot of things.

He's silent for a moment, and then he glares hatefully.

"I am trying to be patient with you," he says through clenched teeth. "That bonding spell we used is very old and I could have a lot of control over you if I wished. Don't temp me."

That thought actually sent a chill down my spine, and I furrow my brow.

"I want to break up," I repeat again because I'm so very angry and I just want to hurt him.

"You can't just break up with me, Ginny," he sneers like I was stupid. "I'm your husband."

It didn't sound right at all.

This is not how I imagined my married life taking off...

"Then I want a divorce," I say with my head tilted up and he actually laughs at me.

It's a humorless laugh.

"That's impossible," he says as he puts a hand on his slender hip. "I told you our bond was done with old magic. It's unbreakable because you were a virgin when we first made love. I'm sorry, but you're stuck with me."

"I hate you," I whisper. I didn't mean it, I know I didn't, but I just needed to say it for some reason.

I needed to get away from him so I could figure all of this out, but I had no one to run to. I narrow my eyes. That's his fault too.

"No, you don't," he scoffs like I was an idiot. "Now, stop this ridiculousness. It's over and it's done. It's not like we have to go and buy furniture together or anything. I did it to protect you. Fucking trust me, I don't want to be fucking married at eighteen, but I did it for you. As your head of house I can control what happens to you here."

"You're a liar and a manipulator and you're just like Tom," I tell him in a hissed whisper and he narrows his eyes again. "You're just like him," I tell him and the I look at him under harsh eye lashes. "Only not as powerful. You're a poser and I hate you and I don't want to be married to you and I want you to take this goddamn bracelet off of me! I should have never let you into my life. Everyone was right to tell me to be careful, but I didn't listen and now I'm stuck with you and you're a terrible person and after all of this Harry truly did like me and I should have gone with him because he never would have done something like to me!"

I meant for it to hurt, and I suppose it did because he clenched his fist and a vase shattered somewhere behind me. It made me jump and when I looked back at Draco in surprise for the uncontrolled magic, he was breathing heavy and his cheeks were flushed.

"I'm going to give you a moment to calm down," he says hatefully, loosening his collar as he tries not to yell at me. I've never seen him look more angry and that pissed me off as well. He has no right to be upset. The liar."I'm going for a walk."

He leaves after that, and I'm left standing in his stupid fucking room.

I narrow my eyes and then I go back to rampaging his things to find my compact. I look in every drawer, I check the closet, and the bathroom, and I even look behind his wardrobe with no luck. I can't find it anywhere and with a frustrated sigh I try one last place. I don't find it under bed either, but I find his potion's kit and I sit on the floor as I put it on my lap and carefully snap it open. He has a whole array of potion bottles and vials in here, labeled with black marker.

I pull some of them out and read the labels carefully. _Stamina._.. one says._ Pepperup_ is written on another. I pull out another vial that has my name on it. _Ginny/birth control_ it says and I make a face at it before putting it away. It made me feel easy for some reason to see my name by that. Something along the lid caught my eye, though. I noticed a manila folder sticking out from behind the lining of the box. I carefully tear the fabric until I can pull the whole thing out.

_The Prometheus Project _is written across the front of the folder in bold type.

It makes me think of the fiendfyre I saw him control at his Manor... and of the dead Ministry employs...

Maybe I'll find some answers.

I open the folder and skim through his pages of math formulas and spells... I don't understand most of it, so I keep going. There are drawings of rune symbols, lines with numbers around them, and odd looking buildings that are labeled by location. I don't get it, but I can recognize Draco's smooth handwriting. His notes are written in a language I don't know... It might be french, maybe, but my uncultured mind can't translate it and I end up biting my lip in frustration.

Then I find the pictures.

They are the mugshots of Voldemort's trusted inner circle. All of them have been released from Azkaban after the Dark Lord and his Death Eaters took over Wizarding England. I flit through the glossy photos of the sneering death eaters until I find the photo of Izador Rookwood. He looks vengeful in his mugshot, with his eyes on fire and his lip curled back in a sneer. He's a lot younger looking as well, with his hair long and a beard neatly trimmed.

I quickly turn it over to find some more of Draco's script.

_Head of education _

_unmarried-DBP_

What does DBP mean?

That's what's written on the back and I furrow my brows as I set the photo on the bed. I pick out another picture, one of Phillip Macnair and I turn that around as well.

_Treasury department _

_Widowed-DBC (Daphne)_

Why is Daphne's name on there?

I put that one on the bed as well before going through the rest. There are five photos of men, all with their new titles with the Ministry printed on the back. Draco's female friends are written by most of them as well and it confuses me as I try to put it together.

Everything bloody confuses me.

Rabastan Lestrange, the new Head 'Auror', has Pansy's name on the back of his picture and a fat man by the name of Charles Vandrows has Millicent with that mysterious DBC printed as well...Carlton Crow, a rather nasty Death Eater who killed his entire family for being blood traitors has Cho Chang's name printed on the back and I focus on her name for a few long moments before putting the stack on the bed.

It didn't make any sense to me and I couldn't figure it out.

It's really odd and I don't understand the DB... whatevers that are written either. There are two photos of women in the stack... one of Dorothy Whitewater who went to Azaban for killing muggles to use their body parts in her potions, and one of Bellatrix Lestrange.

They didn't have the same thing written on the back of their photos.

That Dorothy woman just had an address written. It looks liked some private home and a note was scrawled in beside it like an after thought. _(By the levee)_ it read and I shake my head before turning to the sneering and wild picture of Bellatrix Lestrange.

She had one word... one that was a bit more curious and I frown as I read Draco's handwriting.

_Christmas._

That was the quick note etched there and I set it down with the rest of the stack as I try to figure it all out.

Hermione would probably figure this whole thing out in two seconds flat.

Hermione... I need to find Hermione...

I snap my eyes to the clock in the room before making my decision.

I'm leaving.

I take Draco's folder and grab my bag. I will figure this out and I will find my friends. I leave his room and head straight towards the Slytherin dorms with determined and forceful steps. I find a first year pureblooded boy hovering around their portrait hole and I force him to give me the password with my wand pointed at his poor little chest.

"B-But," he starts as I jab my wand into his ribs. "No one can go in there just now. They said-"

"Just give me the fucking password," I tell him and his eyes brimmed with tears. "Please?" I added because I didn't want him to cry. He looked so little.

"Helios," he whispers and I pocket my wand.

"Thanks," I mutter softly, letting him run away.

I felt a little bit bad about doing that to him, but the moment of guilt passed quickly once I got inside of the common room.

To my surprise, and relief, the common room was empty and I hike up my bag before going over to the fireplace with Draco's folder under my arm. I know Draco tapped something over here with his wand to get it to open and I take out my own as I study the stones, trying to remember what he did the day he helped Ron and his friends leave the castle.

I tap a few stones with my wand, but nothing happens and I sigh before trying again. Think, what did he do? He said something too, I think. I try to remember what he muttered into the wall but after a few minutes, the door starts to open behind me and I panic.

I quickly, and stupidly, I might add, hide behind some curtains along the wall and I tilt my feet in to hide myself more as two people walk into the common room. I can see them through the little sliver I've allowed myself and I pray they don't notice how oddly I'm hidden with my bag pressing painfully into my back as I hold Draco's folder close to my chest. I hold my breath when I see Pansy and Blaise make their way in and they check the room to make sure it's empty before facing each other.

Blaise sits heavily down on one of the couches and Pansy settles across from him with her long legs crossed at her knees.

"So, you cleared out my common room quite efficiently," he says as he looks around. I hold my breath as his eyes run past me, but he gives no indication that he saw me. "What did you do? Threaten to sing to them."

The first year did start to say something about no one going into the common room. This must be why.

Damnit.

"Don't be a dick," Pansy hisses at him as she crosses her arms. "You know I've been wanting to talk to you for a while and you've been avoiding me."

"Successfully until now it seems," he says flatly and she glares.

"I want to get a few things straightened out," she says. "Before I do what I have to do," she adds and I furrow my brows. "You are fully aware of my feelings," she says sharply. "I have mentioned them to you many times throughout the year but you have either brushed me off or turned the conversation completely around."

Zabini raises and eyebrow and puts his arm along the back of the couch. Making himself comfortable, I see.

"Now, I know I've told you before, but this time I mean it. Either you fully commit to me and this relationship, or we're over."

Zabini is silent for a few moments before he taps his fingers against his knee. "What do you want me to say?" he says with a shrug and Pansy narrows her eyes. So do I. Zabini is such a tool. "You know I have no intention of being in a relationship with anyone. Before we started this, I made my intentions perfectly clear. You promised me that nothing was going to come of it, but here we are, having this fucking conversation that I always told you I didn't want to have."

Pansy retracts like she was struck, and then she narrows her eyes. "You told me you loved me."

He laughs.

"I was drunk," he says like it didn't matter. "And you were taking advantage of the situation."

"How was I..."

"You knew what day it was," he snaps hatefully and she shuts her mouth. "I said it because you did first. I don't love you. I won't love you and this whole conversation is bloody ridiculous. All that we are to each other is a few good fucks and then-"

Pansy pulls out her wand and shoots a curse at him.

He dodges it just in time and it hits the couch, tearing it to reveal the stuffing. He narrows his eyes as he hops out of his seat and he takes out his own wand as well.

"You fucking bitch," he says before throwing a curse at her.

I gasp as they start dueling against one another. A curse hit's Blaise that makes his nose bleed and then a spell hits Pansy's arm that causes it to burn and she screeches in pain. I spell hits the curtains I'm hiding behind and they catch on fire. I cover a scream and quickly point my wand at it put out the flames before they burn me up or reveal my hiding spot. No one notices the fire go out because they're too busy trying to kill each other.

I can't believe they're fighting so violently like this. It makes me think of my own fight with Draco and how tame that was. After twenty minutes of a heated duel that ended up breaking two lamps, a chair, Blaise's watch, and a painting, they finally stopped flinging curses at each other long enough for someone else to come into the common room.

The curtain I'm hiding behind is singed from the fire curse and it smells horrible so I cover my nose and close my eyes until I hear the new person's voice.

"What are you two doing?"

That is the last person I want to hear right now and I open my eyes to see Draco walk into the room with a scowl on his face. He takes one look around the room before he makes a face and takes out his wand.

He lifts it and takes their wands away from them.

They don't seem to protest much and they glare at each other as Draco places _their_ wands in his pocket.

"Fighting inside," he tisks his tongue as he walks further into the room and he takes seat on one of the leather arm chairs. "How very common of you two. Although not all together surprising, I thought we had agreed to keep a relatively low profile for the time being," he says sternly as he looks at the broken lamp by his side. He takes out his wand and fixes it with a swish of his wrist. "Although your spell work is lovely." he adds sarcastically before crossing his legs. "Is the room secured? I suppose it is after the show you just put on," he says and they both look away.

No one says anything for a while and he looks at both of them with raised eyebrows.

"Well?" he says, his cheeks still tinted pink and Pansy quickly nods her head..

Daphne once told me that only happens if he's pissed off or turned on. I bet I know which one he is right now, the bastard.

I wonder if he's still reeling from our conversation. I hope he is.

"Sit down," he says and they follow his order quickly. "Did you get your folder?" he asks Pansy and she nods her head before handing it over to him. Draco opens it and quickly glances down at the pages inside as Zabini wipes away the blood from his nose. "Well, you already know what you have to do," he says irritably as he closes the folder and throws it on the coffee table with his leg bouncing up and down. "I'm tired of bloody repeating myself to everyone I come into contact with and if you don't get Theodore Not off of my damn back I will break his hands," he says levelly, glaring at Zabini.

Blaise nods his head and runs his fingers over his thigh. "I will speak to him," he says flatly and Draco nods his head sharply.

"See that it gets done. I have more important things to do than worry about how he _feels._"

No one says anything for a while and Blaise sits back with his arms crossed as he glares at the table.

"How did Ginny take the news?" Pansy asks after a while of silence and my ears burn at the mention of my name. "She left the hall," she adds. "I couldn't watch her after that."

"Not well, as you can imagine," he says flatly and then he licks his teeth. "They had Rookwood talk to her," he says and my stomach starts sinking. They all knew this before I did. "He has put in his claim already and they're going to start taking her blood."

"We'll have to move up our plans," Blaise says with an eyebrow raised and Draco snaps his eyes to his friend.

"Yes," he says flatly as he furrows his brows.

He starts tapping his foot against the floor again... both of them take notice. Who is _he_? Is it Rookwood? They have to know who that is too!

"Are you okay?" Pansy asks skeptically as Draco starts to chew on the insides of his cheeks.

"Yes, I'm fine," he says sharply and she raises her eyebrows.

I hope he's not fine. Jerk.

He clears his throat. "I had to tell Ginny about our bonding," he says flatly as he looks at Pansy. "She was getting hysterical about the marriage arrangements they had made for her and I wanted to put her at ease," he says and Zabinia rolls his eyes. "But it seems to have had the opposite effect."

Hysterical. He honestly said I was being hysterical!

"I can see that," Blaise says flatly. "Girls can be so dramatic," he says, shooting a look to Pansy who narrows her eyes.

"I can understand her anger and confusion," he says as he taps his foot against the floor again. He stares ahead of him, not bothering to make eye contact with the others. "But once she calms down I am sure she will see the benefit to this. She wouldn't honestly try to leave me. Not that she could anyways, but still," he says, like he was talking to himself and Pansy and Zabini exchange an odd look. "She loves me."

"Well," Pansy says. "Maybe she said that to you when she was drunk and you were taking advantage of the situation," she says, making a jab at Zabini, but he rolls his eyes again.

"Hardly," Draco scoffs with a glare. He starts tapping his foot again and Pansy sits forward.

"I was just joking, of course," she says with concern as she watches Draco's wand hand twitch around his wand. "She will see the benefit of being bonded to you, Drake," she says, like she was reassuring him... carefully so. "You are a handsome rich wizard who can take care of her and she does love you. Girls like her do not lie about such things. She will come around and bend to your wishes."

Bend to his wishes?

What does that mean?

For some reason, that made Draco relax a bit and then he seems to find his fire again.

He flicks his eyes to Zabini. "I've made the decision to go to the levee tonight," he says and Zabini nods his head in understanding. "Time is more important now than anything," he says as he stands and walks towards the fireplace.

Crap.

I suck in, like that would fucking help, and try not to be seen as he takes out his wand and taps the stones. I try to pay attention, but I can't see from this angle and I can't hear what he whispers against the wall. The fireplace moves to reveal the passageway and he turns around to face his friends as he takes out their wands from his pocket.

"Conduct yourself with a little more dignity," he says as he tosses each wand to it's owner. "If we are the higher race, then we must act like it," he says before checking his watch. "I should be back shortly. I find that she is usually alone on most nights so it should be rather easy. My alibi is obviously with the two of you, so get your stories straight before I return. The papers will be buzzing and we need to be in shock with the rest of them," he says.

He waits for them to agree, and when they do, he nods his head before walking off.

The fireplace closes behind him and Blaise and Pansy spend exactly thirty seconds alone before they both stand up.

"We're studying charms in Draco's room. How does that sound?" she says sharply and Blaise nods his head.

"Perfectly fine and impossibly boring to me," he says with an eyebrow raised.

She glares one more time before leaving the common room and Blaise watches her go before running a hand through his hair and sighing.

"I need a cigarette," he mumbles to himself before jogging up the staircase to the right.

I take a deep breath and slide out of my hiding spot. My initial 'I'm leaving' fire has left me and I clutch Draco's folder to my chest as I scurry out of the common room. It's almost too much to digest, too many questions I need answered and no one to talk to. I clench my jaw as I walk around the castle, trying to figure things out and trying to decide how my actions will fit in with them until I find myself at the main entrance hall.

I can see Dementors floating in the distance outside and I sigh as I walk towards the doors and push them open. There's a constant fog around the castle now because of those stupid creatures and I take a seat on one of the concrete steps as I look at the sky, letting the wind chill my bones as I place by bag by my side.

I really wish I had someone to talk to here. I cross my arms with Draco's folder on my lap as I chew on my lip. I need a friend. I feel so isolated right now. Pansy had known this whole time it seems, and that would mean that she knew way before all this happened as well. Was she only my friend because of Draco?

I shake my head at my limited amount of friendships that have survived and I try to see my situation from another persons perspective. If my friend was going through what I was going through, what kind of advice would I give them?

I would probably tell her that Draco was a no good liar who was way too controlling.

I remember taking health class in my fourth year and we had to read a whole check list of red flags of an abusive relationship and as I think Draco, he does fit some of those descriptions.

-jealous and possessive... check

-controlling...check

-intimidating... double check

I can't talk to any of my family members and the only friends I have now are his friends... besides Luna, of course, but she's so far up Theodore Nott that she barely has time to look at me. I furrow my brows as I think about Luna. Did Draco make Theo date her just so I would be on my own? So I would accept his friends better... No... I shake my head. He wouldn't do that. That's just ridiculous.

I start chewing on my nails.

Of course, Draco has his good points as well.

I love him and I'm pretty sure he loves me.

He can be so sweet and he makes me feel important and special... sometimes... not when he lies.

I bite so hard I break a nail and I move to another finger.

He gives me nice things and he takes care of me and he kisses so bloody well.

I had trusted him completely when everyone warned me not to. I should have listened to Hermione.

I sigh as I think about how much he makes my heart ache and I start chewing on the fingers on my other hand. I can't focus on my feelings because I'll choose him every time just based on the way he makes me feel when we're together. I need to see this critically... as an outsider.

But he's so handsome...

But he could have told me everything sooner! He could have warned my family and the Order!

I feel like my heart is breaking.

This must be what it feels like to die.

"Would you like one?"

I jump when I hear Zabini's voice and Draco's folder slips to the ground. I quickly pick it up and stuff it in my bag. I was too stuck in my own thoughts to hear Blaise's approach and now my heart is racing. He sits down beside me and offers me a cigarette, but I shake my head and turn back to the gate.

"Suit yourself," he says as he puts one in his mouth and he uses his wand to light the end.

I roll my eyes.

"How did you know I was out here?" I ask coldly and he glances at my profile.

"I'm not stalking you, I assure you," he says as he blows smoke from the corner of his mouth. I glare at him. "I obviously just came out here for a smoke and I saw your little red head hanging about. I thought I'd come and say hi before they started showing up."

"Who's they?" I ask sharply and he nods towards the gate.

"They'll be coming back today," he says and I raise my eyebrows. "The people who were sent for re-education," he clarifies.

Neville.

I'm a terrible friend. They were all taken away last week. I was too worried about my family to really try to help him and Draco kept me so distracted...

That's another thing to add to the con list.

-Manipulative... check.

Some Gryffindor I am.

"What happened to them there?" I ask and he shrugs. Of course he doesn't know. If he did, he wouldn't tell me anyways.

We sit in silence for a long time before it becomes too much for me to bear.

"You knew." I whisper, thinking of Draco and I look at my right hand, where the red lines of his bonding spell secured our hands together.

"Knew what?" he asks flatly as he dusts ashes off his black slacks.

"That Draco and I were bonded?" I ask with a furrowed brow. I give him a troubled look. "I didn't know," I admit in a small voice. "He didn't tell me... I thought..." I trail off and shake my head as he studies my face.

"Of course I knew," he says and I give him a sharp look that he smiles at, with his amber eyes twinkling. "I told him it was a good idea," he says and my throat goes dry. "Why are you so angry about that?" he asks with his head tilted to the side. "It has always worked out in your favor, has it not?"

"But... my family..."

"They're still alive, aren't they? That's more than most people can say these days."

"But..."

"If you love him, why are you upset?"

"He lied to me. Not everything is forgiven just because you love someone," I say heatedly and he raises one of those dark perfect eyebrows.

"I thought that's what people like you did," he says. "Forgiving people and loving... all that nonsense."

I glare at him again, and then I stare at his lips as he puts the cigarette at the corner of his mouth and takes another drag before flicking it to the ground. It burns against the first stone step and I stare at it as I think of Draco.

I don't know if I feel like crying or hitting something right now, but I know I just want to understand what's happening... I want to understand why Draco has done things the way they he did and why... and I want to hurt him like he hurt me...

What would piss him off the most?

I glance at Zabini from the corner of my eyes as he runs his hands through his dark hair.

I smile a little to myself at my plan. I don't know why I'm smiling, actually. I'm not very pleased. I just want to break Draco's heart like mine is breaking. Draco has trust issues, that's been the thing from the start and he's always been so ridiculous when it came to me being around other guys. Now that I think about it, that's a little unhealthy. A little jealousy is nice, it makes you feel good, but not to that degree... not enough to justify trapping someone into a marriage they never agreed to in the first place.

_But you love him... _

_It doesn't matter!_

I look at Blaise's pretty face again... I want to make Draco cry a little, see if he even cares.

First step_: _

_Seducing Blaise Zabini._

"Blaise," I say as I turn my head towards him as he pockets his wand.

"Hm?"

"Look at me," I say and when he looks at me with his golden eyes, I bring my hands up to his one of the curls by his face and I touch it gently, pretending to smooth something off of it. "You had something in your hair," I tell him softly and he gives me a suspicious look and then he glances at the hand I have yet to move.

I study his face as I move my fingers down to his cheek.

I know Zabini is attractive, beautiful even, but he doesn't stir the same kind of feelings that Draco does... or that Harry used to... but he sure is nice to look at.

"What are you doing?" he asks with an eyebrow raised as I lick my lips.

My hand starts burning as I rest my hand on his smooth neck.

"Weasley, what the fuck?" he says as I let my hand slide down his chest.

The burning is almost unbearable now, but I keep going.

"Do you think I'm pretty, Blaise?"

It sounded like such a ridiculous question coming out of my mouth. It sounded sexier in my head, but I find that my mental rehearsals never seem to measure up to the awkwardness that is me in real life.

He grabs my hand before it can go any lower.

"Your boyfriend will cut off my head," he says, his voice sounding deeper, almost charmingly seductive.

Geez, no wonder he gets so many girls.

I look at his lips. "He might not be my boyfriend for much longer," I say a little sadly before leaning in and pressing my lips against his.

I can ruin a lot of things with this kiss.

Pansy's relationship (or lack there of) with Blaise. Blaise's relationship with Draco. Draco's relationship with me. My friendship with Pansy...This could be a domino effect and I can hit it all in one go.

It's nearly perfect, actually.

I get tugged back like I did with Harry that night, but I stand my ground and tense my muscles as I push him back and straddle his lap as I think of how angry Draco will be and how he'll be able to feel this because of that 'promise to be faithful' bond that was really a fucking marriage thing. Even Pansy would be angry if she knew who I was kissing and I don't even care. She lied too. She told me that many people did that in relationships and that it was a good thing. She knew all along as well and I slip my tongue against Zabini's lips as it starts to burn at such a level that I think I'm going to catch on fire.

Blasie kisses me back, to my surprise, and he even twists his hands in my hair.

I almost push him back because he seems to be getting too much into this... and then he freezes and he tries to push me off of him.

When I pull back he looks shocked for a moment before he glares at me.

I'm pissing off a lot of people with this and I'm pleased.

"What are you doing?" he hisses. I stare at him with my eyebrow raised. He pushes me off his lap and stands up with a panicked look on his face as I settle myself on one of the concrete steps. "Why did you do that?" he shouts as he stands up. "Do you realize what Malfoy is going to do to me? Do you have any fucking clue?"

I smirk at him as he cusses under his breath …. I think he calls me a cunt, actually, and I make a disgusted face at his back as he stalks off.

Good riddance.

I wipe off my lips and stand up with my bag slung over my shoulder as the gate starts to creek open. My body feels like it's on fire, but I'm too worried about everything else to really notice. Suddenly, rows of students dressed in black come walking in and I step to the side as they walk towards the castle in four single file rows, neat and crisp. They're all walking with their heads down and I furrow my brows as the female Carrow professor walks beside them, spewing off orders about staying in line and keeping their heads bowed.

I see Neville in the back and I hesitate for a few moments before running towards him.

He doesn't even look up with my approach and I grab his arm. "Neville, are you okay?" I ask.

Then he looks at me and I gasp.

There are bluish looking bruises around his eyes and his facial expression is blank. There isn't the warmness in his eyes that he usually has... there's nothing there.

"Neville?" I whisper. He's looking at me like he has never seen me before and that he didn't care to know who I was. "Are you okay?"

"Hey you," the female Carrow comes towards me and grips my arm. "You get back in the castle."

"What have to done to them?" I say, looking back at Neville's blank face as he falls back into line.

He looks like a zombie, they all look empty, cold.

I get pushed back and they all walk back into the building as I stare after them with my jaw slightly dropped. I should have helped Neville when I could have. I should have made Draco help... having a chance at life on the run would be better than whatever that is.

What happened to them?

Once they're in the castle and the doors are closed, I turn back to the gate and look out as it closes. My skin still burns, but I ignore it as I clench my hands around my wand.

I stand there for an hour, my skin burning, and that's how Draco finds me.

He steps behind me and puts his chest against my back. He smells like fire... like smoke, but I don't question it because I don't want to talk to him. I ignore him, but shift my gaze when he raises the golden compact in front of my face. I see my angry reflection in it and I reach up to snap it shut.

"I'm sorry," he says against my ear. He kisses my cheek and the burning stops. "Come back into the castle with me," he says seriously. "It's going to rain."

"I made out with Zabini," I tell him to hurt him.

"I know," he says with a sigh. "Come," he says as he takes my hand. "Come with me."

"Why did you do this?" I ask softly, sounding embarrassingly broken as tears threaten to fall.

"We'll talk later," he whispers. "Now is not the time."

I really do hate him right now.

"I don't run on your time line anymore," I say and there's a shakiness in my voice that I wish was a little more steady.

"I'm weaving a very tangled web," he says against my hair as I cradle the compact to my chest. "It's going to be hard for you to keep up."

"Okay," that's all I say... that's all I can say as I think of Neville and his zombie eyes.

"But..." he continues and I blink a few times before pulling back and looking at him. He looks into my eyes for a few moments as he runs his fingers gently down my jaw... and then he grips my chin with his fingers painfully to keep me in place. "If I ever find out you kissed Blaise Zabini again, I'm going to fucking kill him. I know you did it to get my attention but there are other ways to achieve that end. I won't tolerate it again."

When he lets his hand drop, I glare.

I take out his folder and push it at his chest. He looks surprised as it all falls to the ground.

"I never want to speak to you again," I tell him coldly before going back to the castle.

To my surprise... and a little disappointment... he doesn't follow me, nor does he make anyone else check up on my either.

I spend the night alone, in my bed with the curtains pulled tight as I stare up at the ceiling. I wish I was older, smarter, more powerful... I with I was a lot of things because I'm sure if I was better... I would know what to do, but instead all I can do is stare ahead of me and try not to cry.

It takes me hours to fall asleep and when I do I dream of Tom and snakes and boats...

When I wake up the castle is buzzing with gossip and fresh news. I grab a paper as I walk towards the great hall and I stop walking when I read the headline of the censored Death Eater run paper.

_Murder at the Levee _

I stop breathing for a moment or two as I see the photo underneath that bold letters.

_Dorothy Whitewater. _

_...Trusted Advisor and Head of the Security Council was found burnt to death in her flat last night. The aurors say they have no suspects, but all signs point to the underground Order of the Phoenix movement which has claimed the lives of more than twenty wizards and witches in the past two weeks.. _

That's an awful lot of speculation for a news paper... I guess it's more of a propaganda piece now.

_..The Auror department has no solid leads at this time but it has been assured the death of Mrs. Whitewater will not go unpunished. The Dark Lord has let it be known that anyone associating with or murmuring the thoughts of the recently disbanded Order of the Phoenix will be tried for treason..._

The articles goes on to describe what a great family woman and loyal follower of the Dark Lord's regime that Whitewater woman was and I fold the paper over as I stare at the wall, seeing nothing.

Draco went the levee, now a woman is dead.

He smelled like fire...

Oh, my god.

* * *

"I think I'm going to break up with Draco."

"What?" Pansy says flatly with one sharp brow raised.

I don't say anything for a few moments as I let it sink in. I know they all heard me. The three of us are sitting on top of the beds in the seventh year girls dorm and you could hear a pin drop it got so quiet.

"But... you can't break up with Draco," Daphne says, giving me an uncomfortable smile as she leans forward. "No, no, no, Ginny. You don't want to do that. Don't be silly."

"I'm not being silly," I say as I look at them both. "I'm being serious."

"But..." Daphne blinks again. "No, Gin, you love Draco, remember?"

"I know..." I say uncomfortably as I test the waters of our friendship. I need to find out if I have anyone on my side. "But I think it's time for us to take a break."

"Take a break or break up?" Pansy asks coldly. "Those are two different things."

"He's not the person I thought he was," I say honestly as I cross my legs. It was true. Who was Draco Malfoy? My lying, death eater husband, or the killer of death eaters? I don't know because he never tells me one way or another.

It's all scary.

"No one is who they seem at first," Pansy says as she slides off her bed. "Stop being so dramatic."

She knows that I know about my 'marriage' or whatever to Draco and she's eying me critically, like she was waiting for me to say more. What a bitch. I was so nice to her when she was talking about breaking up with Blaise and now she's trying to make me feel stupid for even bringing up such a thing. No one even asked me why I want to end it with him.

"I don't know if I love him anymore," I say. It was a lie, of course. I love Draco so much it hurts sometimes but now my mission is to hurt Pansy. "I think I like someone else."

"Who?" she asks sharply.

"I kissed Blaise," I tell her and Daphne gasps with her hand over her mouth.

"What?" Pansy says flatly as she narrows her eyes.

I look at her. "I kissed Blaise," I tell her and she looks like she wants to curse me, but instead she puts her hand on her hips as she stands. "It was nice," I lie and she narrows her eyes into small little slits.

"Why would you do that?" she asks through clenched teeth and I stand up as well.

"I thought you broke up with him?" I say softly, cruelly. I was supportive of her and her decisions, but come to find out she was never my friend to begin with. It all goes back to Draco.

"It doesn't matter what I fucking did," she hisses and Daphne widens her eyes as she takes a step back. "There's a girl code, Ginny, and you can't just snog your friend's boyfriend!"

"Girl code?" I snap hatefully. "If there is a 'girl code', I'm sure it's in there somewhere that if a friend is being manipulated by her over bearing boyfriend, then a friend should step in and help out."

"What are you talking about?" she hisses and I glare.

"You knew what Draco's been doing," I say and then I glare at Daphne. "You both knew and never told me because you were never my friends to begin with."

"Oh, Gin..." Daphne takes a step forward and shakes her head. "We..."

"Shut up," I say and she widens her eyes again in surprise. "I'm tired of people using me... lying to me..." I say as I glare at Pansy. "And I'm done with you both," I say as I storm towards the door. "By the way," I say as I glare over my shoulder. "Blaise will never love you. He doesn't even like you," I tell her to hurt her as I remember their conversation in the slytherin common room and I know my words hit target, because she makes a sad face before masking it with hatred.

I go back to my own dorm after that with my stomach fluttering nervously. I've never been this bold or hateful and it didn't sit well with me.

I pull the curtain around my bed and tuck myself on the side as I stare at the golden compact in the dark. I've been carrying it with me everywhere I go since Draco gave it back, but I haven't heard anything from Hermione or the others. I also found that it's a one way mirror... I can't send messages to them so I'm stuck just staring and waiting for something to happen.

I tap my fingers against it and close my eyes. I know I won't be sleeping anytime soon, so I just lay in the dark, thinking over my conversation with Draco over and over and over again. There's a knot in my stomach as I think about the way Daphne and Pasny looked at me as well. I hate it when people don't like me, but I'm too angry to give in right now.

Then the compact vibrates.

I sit up and grab my wand. I silence the bed around me and light the end of my wand before putting it behind my ear and carefully clicking the compact open.

I don't see Hermione.

I don't see Ron.

I see Harry instead.

What?

I sit up and give him a puzzled look as he eyes me through the mirror. He looks so tired, and it looks like he has the beginning of a beard coming in.

"Harry?" I whisper and then I bite my lip. He's not wearing his glasses. "Are you okay?"

"I can't sleep," he admits in a soft voice. "Ron and Hermione are in the other room. I took this from her purse... I hope... I hope you don't mind. I haven't talked to anyone in a while. I just wanted to see a friendly face."

"It's okay," I say with a sad smile.

Lonely Harry... lonely like me.

"Is it," he grabs his glasses from somewhere and places them on his face. "Is it safe for you to talk?" he asks, his voice sounding clearer and not so sad. "I'm such an idiot sometimes..."

"No, Harry, it's fine," I whisper as I draw my knees up to my chest. "I put a silenco spell around my bed. No one can hear us."

"Oh," he nods his head and then he glances at me with troubled eyes. "How's Hogwarts?" he asks softly. "We've heard rumors about the goings on at the castle, but it's hard to decipher the fact from fiction when you're on the run."

"Yeah," I say as I lean against my headboard and I start fiddling with my mother's necklace. I've taken to wearing the small sea shell jewelry just in case they escape Azkaban and ever try to find me. They'll know where I'm at no matter where I find myself. That makes me feel better for some reason. "Things have changed here," I explain to him. "Everything is different."

I give him a detailed account of the new happenings at Hogwarts. The divisions between blood status, the new classes, the punishments. I let him know about the building by the forest for the muggle borns and the re-education. Neville and the others were placed in a special dorm by the kitchens and they all walk around like lobotomized zombies.

Neville doesn't even know who I am and it breaks my heart.

"Are you serious?" he says sharply when I tell him about Neville and his dead eyes.

"It's all so terrible," I say and I'm going to start crying again, but I try to stop myself. I don't want to cry in front of Harry. He's the one who should be crying. He has the weight of the wizarding world on his shoulders. "I don't know what to do. Everything's messed up and now they have this new marriage thing they're doing."

"What does that mean?" he asks with concern.

I tell him.

I tell him about what the woman said in the great hall and I tell him about the 'person' who requested me.

"That's barbaric," he says in disgust, his eyes light up with a new kind of anger. "They can't do that to you. Can't you just say no?"

I shake my head, and then I think of Draco.

"What does Malfoy have to say about all of this?" With the mention of Draco's surname, I really do start crying. "Oh, Ginny, I'm sorry... I didn't mean to..."

"No, it's fine," I say as I try to push away those embarrassing tears. "It's just everything is so fucked up right now."

"I know," he whispers. "But it will get better. I promise."

It was an empty promise, but I cherished it none the less.

"I wish I would have gone with you," I admit as I hold the compact closer to me.

"What was that?" he asks because I said it so quietly he probably didn't hear me.

"I wish..." I trail off and furrow my brows as I look into his emerald eyes. "I should have gone with you. I'm sorry."

"You don't have to be sorry," he says. "Maybe this is for the best. I mean, Malfoy has connections right now that could keep you safe. We're constantly running for our lives out here... it's no way to live."

There's a noise in the background on his end and he fumbles the compact. I can see that he's wearing one of my brother's jumpers that has a big golden R stitched across the front.

"Sorry," he mutters once he comes back into focus. "It was just a cat. I'm so jumpy."

"You have every right to be," I admit and then I furrow my brows. "Why are you wearing that god awful sweater?" I ask, trying to lighten the mood.

I don't want to tell him everything about Draco because that would just mean that everyone who told me to be careful was right. I already feel stupid and embarrassed, I don't need anymore shame placed on me.

He gives me a boyish smile that tilts my heart.

"Ron has never worn it," he says as he brings the collar up to his nose and then he lets it drop. "And it smells like you."

That makes me pause and his cheeks turn pink as he tries to backtrack.

"I mean... that it's... your Mom probably used the same cleaning stuff and it smells like the Burrow. Is all I meant. Not that is smelled like you because that would be weird... not that you smell weird, of course. You smell lovely. I'm just saying that I didn't mean to say that the sweater smelled like you because I didn't want you to think I was a... weird-o or anything... because I'm not..I obviously didn't mean to say the sweater smelled like you... I... it's just..."

"Harry," I say to get his attention so I can put him out of his misery. "It's okay. I get it."

"Good, then," he says awkwardly and then he looks down. "We saw Fred and George a couple of days ago," he says and I sit a little straighter.

"You did?" I say. "Are they okay? What's happening with them? Where are they?" I ask. Fred and George were on some kind of 'watch list' according to Umbridge. They were the few family members I have that aren't rotting away in jail.

"They're under house arrest in their flat in Diagon Alley. We barely made it out of their building alive," he says with a slight shiver like he was mentioning something unpleasant. "But they're alive and as funny as ever," he says with a sad smile. "They've been doing an underground radio show to keep the Order members connected and informed on what's been going on. It's all in code and disguised as a comedy show, but I think the Death Eaters are starting to catch on because they keep on putting restrictions on them. I think they're going to try to escape here in the coming weeks."

"Oh, well, that's good," I say with a little smile. I'm glad they're okay and I'm glad there are people still out there hoping for a better tomorrow with out Voldemort. "I'm glad they're okay."

"Yeah..." he says and I look into his eyes.

"I'm glad you're okay too," I say and he nods his head. "Are you... okay?" I ask carefully.

He shrugs. "I guess so," he mutters and then he looks away. "I-I should go," he says and I wish he wouldn't. I sit up straight and stare at the mirror. "Can I... can I call you again sometime?" he asks tentatively and I find it positively adorable.

But for some reason I feel bad, like I was cheating on Draco or something like that, but I'm not doing anything wrong.

"Of course," I say with a pleased smile. "Just make it late at night... that way it doesn't go off during the day."

He smiles. "I'll try to remember."

"Great," I say and then I hesitate a second. "Good night, Harry."

"Goodnight, Gin," he says with a pleased grin and before he can close the compact I quickly say his name. "Yeah?" he asks uncomfortably.

"Thank you for.. .you know... everything," I say and he raises an eyebrow in question. "I mean being the savor of the wizarding world and all. I couldn't have picked a better candidate."

He laughs a little.

It's a sad laugh.

I close the compact after that and I lay back against my pillows with a little smile on my face.

All hope is not lost.

* * *

A large picture of Salazar Slytherin now hangs in the main hallway of the castle, looming down at the students with an ominous glare on his twisted looking face... and I'm painting all over it.

I hold the brush in my right hand and smear the red paint all over the old man's head. He looks like something out of an abstract painting now and I smile to myself. I've become quite the vandal to the utter annoyance of all the teachers in the building. I start writing over the picture, looking behind my shoulder once to make sure no one is watching before turning back.

_Long live Dumbledore's army!_

After painting out the message, I smile and stand back with the can of paint and the brush hanging in my hands as I look at my artwork. I seem to be what's left of Dumbledore's army, but who cares.

Little things like this make me feel like I'm doing something worth while. A little anarchy never hurt anyone and no one has figured out it's me that's defacing all of the statues and paintings of pureblooded hot heads like Salazar Slytherin. I'm pleasantly surprised that the other paintings and the ghosts haven't told on me yet, but I suppose they miss the way Hogwarts used to be run as well.

It's like a jail here now, some military jail run by monsters.

I hear someone coming down the hall and my heart starts racing.

Now would be a terrible time to get caught.

I quickly gather up all of my evidence of misdeeds and throw them in my bag before running from the scene.

I haven't talked to anyone in two weeks. Well, besides Harry, but his conversations are short and unsatisfying, usually cut off by some attack in the background. I wish I was with them, instead of being stuck here at this stupid castle with these stupid people and my stupid boyfriend.

I haven't spoken to him yet. So I really haven't had a chance to officially break up with him, but I think he gets the idea because he hasn't tried to talk to me... and he hasn't sent any one of his minions either. I wish there was an easy fix for all of this. I don't want to break up with Draco because I love him so very much, but I know I can't stay with him... Can I? I have no one to talk to now, and a part of me does miss him. I honestly feel like getting sick every time I think about him and my eyes water when I'm in class at the slightest mention of his name.

It's pathetic, really, and I thoroughly blame him.

Freaking jerk.

I clench my fists as I think of him and I duck my head as I try not to get upset about it. Then I run into something solid and that something solid makes me fall on my bottom.

My bag falls and the flap opens, revealing the paint and brush.

Fuck.

"Miss Weasley."

I cringe. Snape's voice is like nails on a chalk board and shyly look up at him as I quickly grab my bag and close it so he won't see what I've done.

"You're out of bed after curfew," he says as he eyes me with narrowed eyes. I stand up. I gulp and try to explain why with a lie, but he cuts me off. "I don't care what your excuses are," he says hatefully and my cheeks heat up. "Detention," he says and I make a face. "Tomorrow after classes are finished."

I sag my shoulders.

"Now, go to bed," he says as he walks past. I sigh in relief. "And Miss Weasley," he says and I look over my shoulder with my eyebrow raised. "You have red paint all over your hands," he says and I quickly look down. Fuck, he's right. "I would suggest cleaning all of that off before running into anyone else this night," he says, eying me closely before walking off with a swish of his robes.

That's it? That's all?

I sigh again. I guess Snape is feeling charitable tonight... he has to know it's been me doing all the graffiti around the castle. Why would he just let that slide?

I'm not going to push my luck.

I take a quick shower when I reach my dorm room and ignore everyone as I crawl into bed.

I make it through my day of classes before heading towards the detention hall where three other students are spread out. Cho Chang was made the new Head girl after her evaluation, and she's sitting at ones of the desks at the head of the class room, working on some art project that involves pipe cleaners and cotton balls... and Draco... Draco is sitting at the main desk.

I hate them both.

I narrow my eyes when I see Draco at the head of the classroom, writing on a piece of parchment with a black feathered quill. The Head boy and Head girl have to monitor the Wednesday after school detentions now and they don't look happy about it. When I walk in, he looks up and eyes me coldly before checking the clock. I take a seat at the very back and when it turns three on the dot, Draco stands up.

"You all have to sit here for an hour," he says as I pull a book from my bag. "No talking, no sleeping, no leaving," he says harshly.

He sits back down after that and goes back to his parchment.

I glare at him and start tapping my fingers against the desk.

It echoes in the large empty room and he snaps his eyes towards mine.

I raise an eyebrow and then start tapping my polished shoe against the leg of the chair. His eyes narrow, but after a few moments he goes back to his paper.

I take out a pen from my bag and drop it on the ground. He looks up in annoyance and I hold his intense gaze as I pick out another pen and do the same thing. It clanks against the ground, and rolls towards the front of the class. Cho shushes me and I smile at her as I take out a pencil and do it again. The three other kids in the room all look at me as well, but I don't care. I stare right at Draco as I pick up my book and slam it on the ground. The other kids jump and gasp as it slams against the stone floor.

"Stop it," he says coldly with his brows furrowed in irritation. "Or I'll have them schedule a more grueling detention for you."

I've heard those rumors, about how the Carrows deal with the more intense detentions with unforgivables, and I can't believe he'd actually threaten me!

I take out another text from my bag and actually throw it.

It lands on the desk in front of me and it echoes in the room as well.

"Ginny Weasley," Chang snaps as she stands up with her hands on the desk. "I'm going to report you to the head master-"

"Let me handle it," Draco cuts her off with a look and she sits down with a scowl on her face.

Draco stands up to intimidate me, glaring daggers. "Stop it," he says again as I take my pencil case and I throw that as well. I lands on a chair and rolls off, clattering against the floor.

I feel almost bad for the other people in the room, but I don't care.

"No," is all I say as I take out another thing from my bag.

I throw my ink well across the room. It shatters against the wall, getting ink and glass all over the stones.

"Fucking stop it," he hisses and the other kids cower as he stalks towards me.

"No," I say again and he looks like he's going to kill me once he finally reaches my desk.

He leans down until his face is right in front of mine. "You are really starting to piss me off," he says in a cold whisper so the others won't hear. "Knock it off."

"What are you going to?" I ask hatefully. "Crucio me."

"That's it," he hisses as he grabs my arm and pulls me out of the seat. The other students gasp in surprise as he drags me to the door, but Cho forces them to quiet down. "Do you think I enjoy heading detentions?" He questions once we reach the hallway with his hand still gripping my arm. "Do you think I enjoy giving up my free fucking time to babysit a bunch of idiots who don't know how to behave?"

"Are you calling me an idiot?" I hiss and he grips a little tighter as he pulls me further into the castle.

"Shut up," he snaps and I narrow my eyes.

When we get to the empty classroom he felt the need to drag me to, I wrestle myself away from him and cross my arms. "Don't tell me to shut up."

"You can't stay mad at me forever," he says hatefully and I glare.

"I can stay mad at you for as long as I like."

"Would you rather be married to someone else?" he snaps and I snap my mouth shut. "Do you like the thought of an old man slithering into your bed at night? He's not a man anymore, Ginny, he's a monster. Does that turn you on?" he asks, getting closer to me. "Does it get you wet thinking of the terrible life you're going to be subjected to and all the potions you'll have to drink just so you can conceive some twisted monster in your womb. Had I not stepped in and taken some fucking initiative your life would be goddamn miserable. I bet you wish you were with him right now, don't you? I bet you'd love for him to fuck-"

I smack him.

His face flies to the right in surprise and then he levels me with the coldest glare. I bring my hand up to my mouth to cover my surprise. I can't believe I just smacked him.

"You just smacked me," he says like he didn't even believe it himself. "You just fucking hit me," he says with a little more venom as he brings his hand up to his red cheek.

"Oh, my god," I whisper. I feel terribly guilty now... I know I shouldn't have done that no matter what he said. "Draco, I am sorry," I tell him as I step forward and bring his hand down so I can look at it. "I shouldn't have smacked you. I'm sorry," I say again as I touch his cheek. He winces so I let my hand grip his arm. "I'm so sorry."

"I can't believe you just hit me," he says with a head shake.

"Draco, I'm sorry," I'm starting to sound like a broken record. I just can't believe he made me so angry where I resorted to violence like that.

"Are you sorry?" he asks levelly as he looks into my eyes.

I nod my head. "I shouldn't have hit you."

He eyes me curiously for a few more moments before shaking his head. "You should be grateful to me," he says hatefully. "Any other girl would be."

"You're a pretentious bastard," I tell him coldly. I shouldn't have fucking apologized for hitting him. I take a step back to get away from him. "I feel bad for any girl you've ever dated. You're a horrible person."

"Bitch," he mutters and my eyes inflame.

"What did you just call me?" I hiss through clenched teach. "I have every right to be angry with you, Draco Malfoy!"

"Well, fucking get over it, Ginny," he shouts and I clench my fist. "There is nothing you can do to change anything. Even your midnight chats with Harry Potter can't help you now."

How did he know about those?

Has be been spying on me!

I push him and he stumbles back a few paces. "How do you know that?" I hiss as his eyes get so intense that I fear he might be trying to set me on fire.

"I know a lot of things, darling," he sneers sarcastically and I squeal in anger. "Oh, fucking grow up," he says in response and I ball my fists. "What are you going to do, hit me again?"

"Shut up," I hiss and he takes a step closer to me. "Go away!" I tell him before he traps me against a desk with his large body pressed into my own. "Step back, you brute."

"No," he says, mocking me from earlier and I narrow my eyes.

"I swear I will knee you in the crotch if you don't back away from me!" I bring my hand up to smack him again, be he grabs my wrist and glares down at me with stormy eyes.

"You aren't fucking hitting me again," he tells me coldly as he presses his body into mine. "Do you understand that."

"Get away from me."

"You're mine, Ginny," he says with darkened eyes. "I can do whatever I damn well please."

"You are the worst husband ever!" I shout and he's silent for a second before he actually starts laughing.

I don't want to be laughed at.

"Stop laughing!" I tell him and he smirks at me before looking down at me with fond eyes.

"Oh, Ginny, Ginny," he says with a head shake. "My sweet little innocent Ginny," he says before bending down and trying to kiss me.

I turn away.

"What are you doing?" I hiss because this is not where I imagined this fight ending up.

"I'm going to fuck you," he says flatly as he starts undoing my tie. "I'm going to fuck you so hard you won't be able to walk properly for a week," he says and my cheeks turn red in embarrassment.

Did he really just say that?

I smack his hands away.

"What?"

That kind of caught me off guard. I thought we were fighting.

"It has been two fucking weeks," he says as he starts unbuttoning his jacket. "I'm stressed and I want to fuck my girlfriend," he says as he puts his arm around my waist and he pulls me close, pressing his lips against mine. "Is that okay with you?"

"No, it's not."

Is he insane? Why does he think this would be okay? What is wrong with him?

I try to push him back again, only to have him grab my wrists and push me so I'm half leaning on the desk. He throws my legs apart with his free hand and he settles between them as I try to struggle.

"Get off of me!" I yell as I try to get away and when he tries to kiss me again, I bite his lip so hard I break skin.

He hisses and when he pulls back there's a bit of blood on his lower lip. "Fuck," he says as he brings his free hand up to the blood and then he looks at it glistening off his pale fingers. "That hurt," he says and then he looks at me again with fire in his eyes. "Be mad all you want," he says as he glares down at me. "But I know you still want me."

Of course he's right, but I don't want him to know that.

He takes my hesitation as an invitation, and he kisses me again. This time I don't bite him. "Give into me," he says against my lips as he loosens his grip on my wrist. I let my hands fall to my sides like a useless idiot and when he runs his tongue along my lips, I give in like a weakling. I want to be close to him... I'm so lonely and afraid all the time...

It's weak... I know it is.

I'm always so disappointed with myself... but he can make me feel so good.

Ugh, I'm a frustratingly self destructive person.

"I missed you," he whispers against my skin as he moves his mouth down my jaw and to my neck. "Please."

Please.

It sounded so genuine when he said it. I clench my eyes shut and kiss him back. My thoughts are too complex and my feelings are too warped to be much help right now. I can practically feel him smiling as I bring my useless hands up to rest on his shoulders. I slide the jacket off his arms until it falls to the ground as I sit up a little straighter and he hooks my legs around his waist as we kiss passionately.

It wasn't sweet or gentle.

In fact, it felt rough and desperate as I clawed at his clothes and he tore my blouse until it ripped open, the buttons popping off and rolling across the floor. I didn't think it could actually happen like that, to be honest, but I didn't seem to mind because I was in a totally different kind of state than a logical and practical one. He pulled my hair, so I bit his shoulder. He was slamming into me so hard that it hurt, so I forced him on his back and teased him slowly until he growled and used his strong hands to manipulate my movements. He's so strong that he can easily pick me up and throw me into different positions against the desk or along the wall and my nails are long enough that they leave angry red marks down his back when I scratch my fingers down his skin with the intention to leave a mark.

"God," he says as he pushes me up against one of the walls and he lifts me carefully until he slides right into me. "You are so fucking hot," he says and I kiss him again with my hands gripping his arms for balance. "What do you think, sweetheart?" he asks. I bury my face into his neck as my body starts to tingle. "How does it feel? Did you miss me too?" he asks softly as he leaves an open mouthed kiss on my shoulder.

"Yes," I say pitifully.

I shouldn't have said anything at all, because I could feel him smiling.

Smug bastard.

I was a sweating mess full of bruises and bite marks by the time we were both finished and I slumped against the desk as I tried to catch my breath. It made me feel better that Draco was in the same boat and after he was done getting off, he fell on top of my body with a sigh against my ear and labored breathing. His body felt warm and heavy against my own and I used my right hand to slick back some of his damp hair. It was nice that he was sweating too. It evened things out a bit. Draco was almost too perfect looking sometimes.

"Jesus," I heard him whisper and I smiled a little bit because I knew exactly what he was thinking.

That was bloody amazing and intense.

And it felt good to be close to him again... I needed this.

I ran my hand along his neck and shoulder and he hissed when my fingers ran over a rather nasty scratch on his arm. I kissed his cheek and relaxed again as I cradled him between my legs and closed my eyes. I felt at peace for the first time in weeks and as my body came down from the high of climax I let myself pretend that things were all right again.

"I forgot how good this little body of yours felt," he says with a smile as he sits up and hovers over me. I look at his naked body, glistening with sweat and flushed with excitement and I look away with a heavy heart when I remember why I was mad at him in the first place.

He's so good at getting me to do what he wants just because I want him so much.

It's not fair.

He leans down to kiss me, but I turn my head at the last moment. He gives me an odd look when I refuse to face him again. "What is it?"

I gently push him off of me and I start gathering my clothes.

I'm so mad at myself for giving into him.

"Ginny, what are you doing?" he asks as I slide into my knickers and I hook my bra back on. "Ginny," he snaps as I start to put my uniform back on.

He starts getting dressed as well and I can hear him buckling his pants as I attempt to button up my blouse... but I sigh when I remember that it's torn and most of the buttons are gone. I angrily take that off and put on my sweater with out it.

"Goddamnit," he hisses. "Fucking talk to me."

"I have nothing to say," I tell him with a tight throat as I right my skirt.

"Don't pull that shit with me," he says while stomping over to me. He grabs my arm and forces me to look at him. "Why are you acting this way? We just made love."

I narrow my eyes. "We just fucked," I tell him and his eyebrows shoot up in surprise as I pull back my hair so I can put it in a quick bun. "That was it."

"Why are you acting this way?" he says like he was genuinely hurt by my actions. "What do you want me to do?"

"You could start by apologizing and actually meaning it," I tell him shortly before leaving him there in that stupid room that smells of sex and all things Draco.

My hands are shaking when I reach the hallway and I rest against the wall with my hand on my forehead.

That's how Daphne finds me.

"Oh, Ginny," she runs over to me and I glare at her as I try to walk past. "You're not still angry with me, are you?" she says as she follows behind me. "Draco made me swear not to tell you. He wanted to tell you himself and he would eventually. Stop being so mean to all of us," she says, but I continue to ignore her. "What do we have to do to make you forgive everyone?"

I stop and look at her. She blinks her big eyes at me. "Do you know a way to leave the castle?" I ask with an eyebrow raised and she bites her lip.

"Only Draco can open that passageway," she says like she knew what I would ask.

"Could you get him to open it for you?" I ask and she furrows her brows as I take a step closer. "You know he won't do it for me."

"Did you ask him?" she says and I shake my head, but I know he'd just say something to talk me out of it. "Daphne, there is something I have to do. I only have have a handful of family members not in Azkaban. Fred and George are on house arrest right now in Diagon Ally and I need to go see them. I need to know what's happening to my parents."

"But..." she trails off, looking sad. "But I'm sure if you asked Draco he would help you with that. He'd go with you and make sure things turned out alright."

"I don't want to ask Draco," I tell her honestly. "I'm asking you. If you were ever my friend you would help me."

"You would come back to the castle, right?" I nod my head. She licks her lips and gives me a critical look. "I'll go with you," she says. "If I go with you, I'll see what I can do."

"Of course," I tell her, only half lying. I'm not sure what I would do with here with me, but I'm sure I could lose her.

"Okay," she says nodding her head. "We're having a party Friday night in the Slytherin common room... it's Crabbe's birthday... meet me there and I can see if I can get Draco to open the passageway.

"Okay," I say with a head nod.

"But if I do this, Ginny," she says as she takes a step closer. "If I do this for you, you must forgive Draco. You must do as he says."

"Why is it so important to everyone that I stay with him?" I ask and she furrows her brows.

"Because it's what he wants," she says like that made sense and I furrow my brows.

"Why does it matter what he wants?" I question and she bites her lip.

"Because," she says seriously, trailing off uneasily. "Because it's Draco..."

"Whatever," I say with an eyeroll as I start walking away. "I'll meet you there."

The party was a loud ridiculous display.

Drunk people were crawling all over the common room and music was blaring so loud I just knew the teachers would come and break it up. I glare at my reflection above the fireplace. Daphne had me drink a polyjuice potion to look like Pansy because she said that Pansy wasn't going to come anywhere near this party because Blaise was going to be here. She still hasn't forgiven him for some grave offense against her, I suppose.

So here I was, stuck in Pansy's skinny body with a red cup in my hand as I glared at everyone in the room. I thought it was a pretty good imitation of her, actually.

"So, now," Daphne comes to me with a smile on her face. "I'm going to ask Draco if I can go get more wine. Hopefully he'll open the passageway for us."

"Why are you doing this?" I finally ask her as she looks over my face... Pansy's face...

"Because I don't want you to think I only liked being your friend because of Draco. Of course," she adds as she looks at him. He's sitting on one of the leather chairs by the fire place, glaring into the fire with a shot of some kind of dark liquor in his hands. "We probably wouldn't be friends if it wasn't for him, but I do like you, Ginny. I like you a lot," she says, giving me a beautiful smile.

I smile a little back. Perhaps I was wrong about Daphne.

"Thank you," I tell her seriously.

"But you must never ever tell Draco that I did this," she says worriedly, furrowing her brows as she looks at him again. "He would be so very angry with me and he gets very frightening when he is angry."

"I won't tell him," I say softly. I really have no intention of coming back.

"And you must start obeying him," she says and I narrow my eyes as I look at her. "I know that's a disgusting word," she says and I nod my head. "But he really does have good ideas."

"What does that mean?" I ask and she raises her brows.

"Just, be good to him, yeah?" she says as she starts walking away. "I'm going to go ask him. Don't look suspicious or anything."

"Yeah, right," I mutter once she leaves and I lean against the wall with my arms crossed as I tap my fingers against my red plastic cup full of some kind of foul smelling drink.

I see Blaise approaching me from the corner of my eyes and I look away.

Fuck.

I look like Pansy right now.

Fucking fuck fuck.

"I'm surprised you showed up to tonight?" he says as he slithers beside me. I ignore him. "As I recall you said that you never wanted to look at me again for as long as you lived."

I don't say anything and he laughs.

"I think this is the first time in our history that you haven't had anything to say to me."

"Go away," I tell him shortly because I really do want him to go away.

"Ah, don't be that way, lovely," he says and I glare at him. He smiles again as he props up his arm by my head. "Come to my room tonight," he says and I give him a disbelieving look. After the fight I witnessed between the two of them, why would he even try after he so carelessly hurt her feelings? "Finish what we started this morning," he says with an eyebrow raised and I give him look.

I don't even want to know what they were doing this morning.

"When you told me you never wanted to look at me again but you ended up on your knees sucking my-"

"Oh my god, you're disgusting," I tell him as I cover my ears. "I don't want to hear you talk anymore," I tell him as I start walking away.

He follows with an amused smile.

"In all seriousness," he says as he strolls beside me as I push stupid drunk people aside. "I have the blue prints Draco asked for," he tells me and I stop to look at him. "I would like you to look over them before I turn them in."

"Blue prints for what?" I ask and he raises an eyebrow.

"Are you drunk?" he asks and I shake my head. He eyes me suspiciously before licking his lips. "Right," he says and then he steps back. "Anyways, I want you to look at them. You know how he gets when every little detail isn't perfect," he says, looking at Draco. "He'll be gone most of the night and he needs them by morning."

"Oh, alright," I say uncomfortably because I don't want to arouse suspicion.

"Good," he says and then he smirks as he pinches my bottom. I look at him in surprise as I smack his hand away. What a pervert. "My room tonight," he says with an amused smile and I glare at him as he walks off.

What a bastard Zabini is.

God, no wonder Pansy wanted to break up with him.

I glare at his back, but I turn back to Draco as Daphne kneels in front of him, speaking to him with animated hand gestures.

I inch closer to them so I can hear their conversation.

"... but, please, Draco. I would really like some wine tonight and it will only take a second."

Draco glares at her and then he looks at his watch. "I'm leaving soon," he says and she nods her head.

"You could let us out then and we'll come back right after. Please, before you leave."

"Why are you so annoying?" he asks and then his eyes flick to mine. "Is it so important that she has wine?" he asks flatly, looking hateful.

I nod my head.

"Everything is closed anyways," he says sharply as he eyes her harshly. "It's a Friday night, Greengrass."

She makes a confused face, like she didn't even think about that obvious flaw in her logic.

"Oh, but they have those vending things outside of the building. It's the cheaper wine, but I just would really like some tonight. Everyone else has what they want."

"Why didn't you fucking tell me when everyone else was getting their alcohol?" he asks and she frowns.

"I didn't know I wanted it until now. Draco, please?"

"Fine," he hisses as he stands up. "But I don't want you to talk to me for at least a week," he says and she claps her hands and then looks at me with an excited smile.

He walks over to the fireplace, and I follow close behind him as he takes out his wand. I hover over his shoulder so I can watch him do it, and he gives me a sharp look.

"Move back," he orders flatly and I gulp before doing as he says.

He never speaks this coldly to me and it surprises me that he does it to his female friends.

The passageway opens after a few moments and Daphne thanks Draco before skipping past him. I go to follow, but Draco cuts me off with his arm across the threshold. I stop and fearfully look up at him.

"Have you spoken to Ginny today?" he asks levelly.

I shake my head nervously.

"Still upset over Zabini?" he asked with an eyebrow raised.

Oh.

I nod my head.

"I don't care about your feelings," he says and I furrow my brows. "When I tell you to do something, I expect you to do it," he says coldly and I look away. God, he is so mean. Why is anyone friends with him? "I am tired of this petty bullshit," he snaps. "Do you understand?"

I nod my head.

"Can't you talk?" he asks sharply.

I lick my lips.

"Yes," I say softly. "I understand."

He eyes me for a moment. "Good," he says before dropping his arm and letting me pass.

I follow Daphne out and we exit the passageway on the other side by moving a large rock with out wands. My stomach is twisting in knots as Daphne takes my hand and starts walking us towards Hogsmeade.

"Where are we going?" I ask because the Apparation point is the other way.

"Draco is here," she whispers. "He needs to think we're getting wine, remember?"

Oh.

I look over my shoulder. Draco had followed us and he's looking at his watch again as he pulls a pair of black leather gloves from his pocket. He puts them on and then he slides a black cloak around his shoulders.

"What is he doing?" I ask as he walks towards the Apparation point.

"He has a meeting," she says and I furrow my brows.

"What kind of meeting?" I ask and she sighs.

When he pops away, we start back tracking to that point. "Just a meeting. Stop asking me so many questions. I don't know everything," she snaps at me and I glare as she takes my arm.

We Apparate to Diagon Alley and I find my brothers flat with no problem.

I knock, but no answer, and I give Daphne a troubled look as I gently push open the door. It's unlocked.

That can't be good.

I walk into their small living room and look around with worry in my chest. Tables have been turned over and there are scorch marks on the wall from magic.

What happened here?

There's an arrest warrant laying on the ground. I pick it up with my eyes glistening with tears and I shake my head in anger at this new world we find ourselves living in. It's not fair. My family, my brothers, are good people. They're not criminals and they shouldn't be treated as such.

"I'm sorry, Gin," Daphne says as she puts her hand on my shoulder. I crunch up the arrest warrant with my fingers and drop it on the ground.

"I just wanted to talk to them for a little bit," I say with a sob in my throat. God, I hope they're okay. I sit down on one of the torn up chairs and I put my head in my hands. "Why is this happening to everyone I love?" I ask softly to myself.

Daphne walks over to me and sits on the arm of the chair. She gently pats my back.

"It's alright," she says softly. "Everything will work out for the best. Everything happens for a reason," she says gently and I roll my eyes. "We should get back," she says as she stands up. "Your potion will only last for twenty more minutes and we can't have you walking back into the common room in your own form. Someone will notice and I will be in trouble."

"What would Draco do to you if he knew you helped me leave?" I ask softly as I take out my wand.

She shivers a bit.

That's not good.

"Draco can be..." she trails off and gives me a sad smile. "He can be creative in his cruelty. Let's just leave it at that."

"But what does that mean?" I ask and she shakes her head.

"Let's get back," she says seriously. "Before we find out, shall we?"

"I'm sorry, Daphne," I tell her as I lift my wand at her chest. She widens her eyes. "Thank you for helping me." I tell her before blasting her with a stunning curse.

She falls to the ground, stiff as a board with a look of surprise frozen on her face. I walk over to her and kneel by her side.

"I really am sorry," I tell her seriously as I take out her wand and place it in her hand. "My stunning curses only last a few minutes," I tell her with a frown. "Don't hate me too much," I add because she was a genuine friend after all, but I can't go back to the castle. "And tell Draco not to be mean to you. You were doing the right thing."

I stand up and dust off Pansy's skinny jeans before leaving the flat and closing the door tightly behind me. I have no idea where to go now. I pull the compact from my jeans and I open it up, staring at the mirror, willing Harry or Hermione or Ron to call me so I can find out where they are so I can join them... but I'm not so lucky and Daphne will be unfrozen soon.

I leave the apartment building and cross my arms over the sparkly tank top and black jacket Daphne made me wear as I try to think of someone I can talk to who isn't in Azkaban, someone I can trust.

The first person who comes to mind is Delsia from Folk hills. She was always a no nonsense person and she seemed to know a thing or two about the pureblooded elite. Maybe she could help me, or at least, know someone who could.

I walk around the cobble stone street for a while until I feel the poly juice potion starting to wear off.

My hair grows longer and turns back to it's original auburn color. The jeans are little too skinny now and I hide in a alleyway as I pop open the first button so I can actually breath with out it causing pain. It's a bit embarrassing, actually. My breasts fill out the tank top a little bit more and my feet scrunch up in the uncomfortable heels. I take them off and glare down at my feet.

I didn't realize I was such a freaking amazon in comparison.

I grip my wand as I hold onto the heels and I think of Del again with her stern face and warnings.

Yes, I need to find Delsia.

I don't know why I feel like I'll find her at Folk hills. I know she has a life outside of the club, but there are only a few places that I actually know the location of to Apparate to. I find an Apparation point and pop to the entertain of the club. I doubt I would be allowed in looking as I look right now. In clothes two sizes too small and bare feet, so I go the service entrance and slip in that way. On my way in, I pass by my old bag and cloak check out counter and I see Nadia there, filing away at her nails.

She looks up as I approach and her eyes widen in surprise.

"Ginny! What are you doing here?" she asks with a smile like this was a pleasant visit. "I thought you were at school."

"I was," I say seriously. "I need to talk to Delsia, though," I tell her seriously as I put my hand on the counter. "Is she working tonight?"

"Oh," she says and she makes an odd troubled face. "No, um, she doesn't work here anymore."

"What?" I ask seriously and she nods her head.

"She was fired today," she says like it was scandalous. "For speaking out against our Great Lord," she says and I would roll my eyes if I wasn't so worried.

"Did they send her to Azkaban?" I ask worriedly and she shakes her head.

"No," she says as she taps her nail file against her chin. "I don't think so. She was cleaning out her office earlier. You might be able to catch her if she's still here," she says and I nod my head. "So what are you doing here?" she asks but I don't have time to answer, because I start running down the hallway.

Which, by the way, is fucking hard in skinny jeans that are way too skinny in the first place.

I finally find Del's office and I knock on the door before going in.

All of her personal effects are in a small cardboard box on the desk and she's standing by the wall, staring at the keys hanging on their hooks.

"Del?" I say uncomfortably and she blinks her eyes before looking at me.

She looks odd. Her eyes look... flat.

"Ginny," she says and then she smiles as she walks towards me. "How good of you to visit me?"

What?

I clear my throat and walk a little further into the room. "I need your help," I tell her quickly. "I'm not sure what to do with myself my whole family..."

"It's a lovely night, isn't it?" she says as she looks around the room.

"Uh," I start with my brows furrowed. "Okay, yeah, I guess it is," I say uncomfortably as I tug on the tight tank top I'm wearing. "But, look, I was wondering if you could..."

"I lost my job today," she says like she was walking in a fog and I make a face as she walks back to the wall of keys. "Did you know that?"

"Yeah, I heard and I'm sorry," I add impatiently. "But, look, you were right about Draco and his friends and you said that I could always walk away if I wanted to. I don't think I'm too far into this and I was wondering if you could help me..."

"What time is it?" she asks dreamily and I slouch my shoulders.

She acting odd... she's acting... I widen my eyes when the realization hits me... she's acting _cursed. _

"Del, who cursed you?" I ask softly as she takes a key off the one of the hooks.

"Is it ten yet?" she asks and I nod my head as she walks towards me.

"Good, I must be going. It's been lovely chatting with you, Ginny," she says before walking past me.

"Where are you going?" I ask as I follow after her.

I can't just let her go anywhere by herself. Someone cursed her for godsakes.

"Club house five," she says as she dangles the keys in front of my face to show me. "You remember that place, don't you?"

"Yes, of course," I tell her and she nods her head.

"Did you know that Folk Hills was built on top of the infamous Black Hills?" she says as she licks her lips.

Black hills. That rings a bell and it makes me think of Draco when he was telling me the story of our families blood feud. The Black hills were the land that our ancestors were fighting over because of the magic it was said to have possessed... because of one of the caves and it's pocket of magic.

"The Malfoy's have owned this land for centuries," she says and for some reason it makes me feel uncomfortable... like it made that story he told me real. "And clubhouse five is said to be one of most powerful places of concentrated magic on the entire planet."

"How do you know all of this?" I ask uncomfortably as we walk towards the clubhouse with soft steps.

"I work here," she says with a shrug. "They say that every spell and every potion and every charm is ten times stronger when it's in Club house five. That's why all the ceremonies and rituals all the purebloods have are hosted there... It's a hotplate for magic and wands."

When we get to the door of clubhouse five, she puts the key in the lock and opens it quickly. I start biting my nails, but when she pushes open the door, I freeze.

"I see you have brought someone with you."

Fuck.

No.

I let my hand drop and I widen my eyes as Lord Voldemort eyes us from his place in the middle of the room. There are torches blazing around him and robed figures with their hoods up are all standing along the perimeter of the room. I can't see their faces and I pinch myself to make sure this isn't a dream.

Holy fuck.

I turn around to run, but the door slams in my face and I feel my heart skip a few beats.

"Let's see what you've brought me," _he_ says and then one of the robed Death Eaters comes towards me and grabs my arm, dragging me to the middle of the room, right in front of _him_ as Delsia stands by the door with her cursed mind. "Hm," he says as he looks me over. "What, oh what, are you doing out of school?" he asks with a sinister smile.

Harry told me that Voldemort had looked like a monster when he came back, with a skeletal bald head, slits for a nose, and lip-less mouth. He was more snake than man Harry had said, but he didn't look that way now... he looked more like the Tom from the diary... if Tom had been drawn by a thing of nightmares. The creature before me is wearing an expensive looking three piece black suit with a waist coat lined in silver thread and a red collared shirt with a matching silk tie.

I shivered as I looked at his face.

He looks older than the Tom Riddle from the diary. He seemed closer to middle age. His hair is thick and as black as coal, cut in an older looking shorter fashion and combed away from his face in a stately manner.

He let his eyes flick over my face and body and I tried not to stare at him. His eyes were sharp and redder than embers. He gives me a thoughtful look before putting his hands behind his back and slowly circling me like a vulture, studying my body in a way that makes me wish I was covered in a large wool sweater. His skin looks like white wax, with odd grooves in it like it was partially melted in some areas and his fingers were long and pale, like spiders legs and yellowing around the fingernails. He looks like he was in the process of dying... like his body was decaying and it made him look like an animated corpse.

"They've sent me photos of you," he says as he circles me. "I know exactly who you are, Ginevra Weasley," he says and I try to still my beating heart because it's thumping so loudly I'm sure they could hear it in another country.

He stops in front of me and tilts his head to the side before reaching out a hand towards me as he takes a step closer. I try not to cringe away as he gathers some of my hair in one of his creepy hands and he brings it up to his face where he inhales a deep breath.

He's smelling me.

I feel like I might faint.

"Your scent is a bit different from what my senses remember," he says as he runs my hair over his pale lips. He does have lips, but they're as pale as the rest of him is. "But there's still that little girl scent in there underneath it all. It's quite charming," he says as he lets my hair drop and I gather it all in my hands, trying to rub out his touch.

"You remember... how I smell?" I say in a shaky voice. This was a different Tom. This was Lord Voldemort, not the cruel teenager from the diary. This was the frightening thing that had killed thousands.

"I remember everything from the interactions with my things," he says as he walks around me again. "It's a fuzzy, jumbled mess, of course, but I remember things," he adds, running his hand along my arm. Like he was deciding whether or not he wanted to buy me from the market. "I remember your blood," he says and it sends a chill down my spine. I even shiver a bit. "It seems our meeting is a bit premature, I'm afraid. You are still too young and I am still a work in progress," he says and I give him a troubled look.

"What does that mean?" I ask in a soft whisper and he smiles. His teeth are disgusting, edged around the corners with some blackish blue substance by his gums.

"This body is new," he says as he steps back and holds out his hands. "Made entirely of magic, but I only have a fourth of my full potential in here," he says as he taps his chest. "You have curse breaking blood," he says, taking a step closer to me.

I look down at his shoes. They are polished so perfectly that I can almost see my reflection.

"Generational, rare, curse breaking blood," he says as his crimson eyes dance across my face. His pupils are slit like a cat's and he smells putrid like a rotting corpse. "Blood that I can use to make myself strong. It has already started to work, as you can see," he says motioning to his face and body. "When I came back I was nearly a skeleton in a robe, but I am slowly starting to build myself back again. I am still a wonder to behold with my wand, am I not?" I asks to the crowd and they all agree with him.

I forgot they were there, to be honest, and I worriedly put my hand on my neck as I try to make myself as small as possible.

"You're going to kill me?" I ask fearfully as I imagine myself cut and drained of all my blood.

He laughs. "Don't be silly," he says. "I must keep you around for a very long time. I will not waste such a gift by going all out in one go," he says as he starts walking around me again.

It makes me uncomfortable. It intimidates me and I'm sure he knows it.

I start breathing heavy.

I might have a panic attack.

I need my pills.

"Your body," he says as he places his hand on my stomach. I want to throw up and my eyes sting with tears. "Radiates old magic," he says thoughtfully. "I am not a man anymore," he says as he runs a cold hand up my arm. I shiver. "I am a God and I will live forever," he says and the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. "But recently it has been brought to my attention the benefits of having offspring that share my blood. There are many spells and potions that can be derived by such a union and seeing as how your blood is pure and strong, I believe we could make quite efficient children. I am a firm believer in fairy tales."

What?

"Oh my god," I hiss as I take a step back. I'm breathing so hard no I can barely get a word out. He cocks an eyebrow and smirks like my distress was amusing. "Oh my god, it's you," I say as I widen my eyes and cover my mouth with my hand as I try not to faint. "You're the person who requested me... you want to be bonded with me," I say in disgust. I can feel the bile in the back of my throat as he nods his head.

"Like I said, this is a body built on magic, but I have taken measures to insure my future in that area," he says as he takes a step closer to me. "And I was able to splice out unsatisfying genes. All that I will need is your half of the DNA and a womb to carry such a creation," he says and all I can think of is giving birth to little snakes with red eyes that spit ink. I feel dizzy and I close my eyes to collect myself... I can feel myself sweating. "You should be proud, little Ginny Weasley. You will very soon be associated with the most power wizard the world has ever seen. You are lucky I have chosen you."

"I think I might throw up," I say around my hand and he narrows his eyes.

"Don't you dare," he says darkly and it makes my spine tingle. He glares for a few more moments before smirking again. "Would you like to see, Ginevra, why your blood is important to me?" he asks and I shake my head. "Good, I shall show you," he says, ignoring me as he walks over to the cauldron in the middle of the room. I didn't even realize it was there and I know nothing good could come from a cauldron that big.

I'm breathing so hard that it's filling up the whole room with the noise and I feel like the walls are closing in, so I start backing up, away from _him_, until I hit something solid. That something solid is one of the Death Eaters and it grips my arms to keep me in place.

He nods towards one of his Death Eaters. "Bring the unicorn," he says and I look around me in surprise.

I've never seen a unicorn close up before and I cover my mouth again when I see one of the robed figures bring out a small baby unicorn from the shadows. It's a small thing, laying on some kind of cart. It looks so out of place in this dark room because it's as white as snow and it's pointed horn glistens like marble in the candle light. It's too pure of a creature to be in this den of snakes and I have to wonder if I look as helpless and as scared as that poor animal on the cart.

It's tied with coarse looking rope that binds its legs together so it can't move and it's mouth has been harnessed shut. It's dark eyes looks wildly around as the Death Eater wheels it towards the pot. It looks impossibly frightened and, with out even thinking, I bust away from the grips of my captor and I run towards it.

"What are you doing with it?" I ask as I gently pet it's mane to try to calm it. I even try to remove the rope from around it's snout, but it's tied too tightly.

"It's so hard to find and capture such creatures," Tom says as he walks towards me and he lays his hand on the unicorn's head as well. He's wearing a ring with a thick black stone at the center that has a intercity carved_ S_ set into it. I flick a look to him in surprise. "But there is a whole colony in the forbidden forest at Hogwarts," he says as he pets it. "It's like catching flies there," he says with a sinful smile and I frown. "The magical possibilities are endless."

"What are you going to do with it?" I ask again, licking my dry lips as I put my hand on it's side. The poor animal is shaking so hard it's vibrating the cart.

He smiles. "You shall see," he says and then he puts his hand on my wrist and he pulls it away. "Back away," he says, nodding to the Death Eater who had held me by the arms. The brute comes back to me and pulls me away, but I don't even struggle because I am far too afraid. Voldemort looks to another black robed figures against the far wall. "Kill the half-breed," he says and he uses his wand to curse Delsia again as she walks towards the cauldron.

I forgot about Delsia. I forgot that she was cursed. Is this why they did that? Is this why they brought her here?

"No," I say as I try to run towards her. They can't kill Del! "No, don't hurt her," I say as the big death eater holds me back with firm hands. "Don't kill her!"

"My Lord," and old voice hisses and Voldemort looks to his left. "The girl is being awfully insubordinate to you."

"Yes, Wormtail," The Dark Lord says in annoyance. He looks at me and smiles again. "But she is still young and learning, and I am a patient Lord, am I not?" he asks and the others in the room agree with him like puppets. "Good," he says and then he looks at the fat death eater who spoke. "Get back into your spot," he says harshly. "You speak out of turn one more time and I will have your tongue," he says coldly and I blink out a few tears.

I'm even more afraid now.

"We all have to sacrifice something for our nation, Ginevra," he tells me calmly as he pets the unicorn's head again, like the disruption never happened. "Everyone has their role."

"No," I shake my head again as a man comes out with a large knife and he grabs Del by the hair, leaning her over so her throat is exposed over the burning cauldron. "No! Stop it! Please!"

"Do make her shut up," Voldemort says.

The man takes a gloved hand and sets it firmly over my mouth. I can't get it off of me, but I keep trying to fight it.

"Wake her up," he says as he pets the unicorn again with his long scary fingers. "The potion tastes sweeter when there's fear," he says and the man with the knife lifts his wand.

Delsia blinks and then she starts screaming like she was coming out of a terrible dream. "What are you doing?" she shouts as she tries to wrestle away from the man who's holding the knife to her throat. "What do you want? I'll do what you want just don't kill me."

"Oh, but, sweetheart," Vodlemort says in a sweet voice as he leans over so he can see her eyes. "You see, killing you is just what I want," he says and she starts screaming again as he motions for the man to cut.

I clench my eyes shut, but I still hear the knife sever her head. It lands with a _plop_ in the potion and I feel dizzy, like I might faint... or throw up... which ever comes first.

"Good," Voldemort says and I keep my eyes shut, willing myself to wake up from this nightmare as I feel myself getting pulled forward. "Open your eyes, little one," he says and the hand that was around my mouth disappears. I blink reluctantly and open my eyes to see him staring at me with a smile on his face. "Dark magic is a dastardly business," he comments as he looks over my face. "But entirely necessary for the greater good."

My lower lip starts to tremble as I see Del's headless body get dragged away.

Then I really do throw up.

All over Tom's perfectly polished shoes.

I hear the other death eaters hiss and cuss at me, but Voldemort raises his hand. "It is alright," he says and he cleans the foul mess with a flick of his wand as I bring my hand up to cover my mouth. "I would be worried if you were more used to such blood shed," he tells me as he brings a handkerchief out of his pocket and removes my hand, dabbing the corner of my mouth where I guess there was leftover vomit.

I'm too afraid to even think that's gross.

"I always appreciate a mind that has yet to be molded," he says with a dark smile before throwing the handkerchief to one of his death eaters who doesn't seem too pleased to be holding something with my vomit on it. "Now," he says. "Where were we?"

I can't even move or speak now, I just keep staring at him as he goes back to the unicorn. I have a terrible feeling in the pit of my stomach as he strokes the creature's head again. I fear it's going to have the same fate as Del.

Poor Del.

I feel tears slipping from the corner of my eyes as Voldemort takes the knife from the man in the robe. He pets the petrified unicorn and few more times before slitting it's throat.

The noises it makes...

_Oh, God._

I cover my ears with my hands while it struggles against it's bonds. The silvery blood leaves it's body through the gaping hole in it's neck and I try not to throw up again. Voldmort takes a golden goblet and gathers some of the gushing blood into the cup. Then he pours it into the potion that hisses and sizzles with the contact. He touches some of the silver blood as it leaves the unicorn's body and I watch him in disgust and fear as he rubs it in between his fingers before putting it into his mouth.

I always knew it was a grave sin to murder a unicorn, but even more great was the sin committed when you drank it's blood.

Tom Riddle was for sure going to hell if he died.

I've never wanted someone to die before, but I was hundred percent positive that I wanted Lord Voldemort to die as soon as possible.

I clench my eyes shut again as he has one of the bigger brutes come up and snap off the creatures horn. It sounded painful, so I was almost thankful the thing was now dead. They threw that into the potion as well and then he turned towards me.

"Now for the main ingredient," he says as he holds out his hand. "Why use a tiny vial when I have the source right in front of me?" he says with an amused smile. "Take my hand, little one," he says and I shake my head. He narrows his eyes, like he wasn't used to someone telling him no. Then he smiles sweetly at me. "I don't think you heard me properly," he says in a bitter sweet smile. "I told you to take my hand."

"I don't want to," I whisper and someone makes a disbelieving noise behind me.

His nostrils flare and he clenches his fist before bringing his hand up and grabbing my hair, dragging me to cauldron that way as I try to break free. "I am running low on patience," he says flatly as he pulls me forward by my hair."Don't move," he orders as he lets me go. I cringe as I rub my hurt scalp and my cheeks heat in embarrassment because every one of those stupid Death eaters saw him treat me that way.

Tears and snot are freely running down my face now, but he doesn't seem to mind as he takes the knife and cleans it on one of his Death Eater's robes.

"Now," he says as he pulls my arm out so it's hovering over the hissing potion. "This is like our first date," he jokes and the others laugh as I cry a little harder. "Romantic, isn't it?" he says sarcastically before putting the sharp end of the knife to my arm. "This is going to hurt," he says before pressing down and slashing.

I scream as the wound burns and he turns my arm over so the blood drops directly into the potion that hisses and spits and turns a glowing neon red.

"There," he says after a few moments. I feel dizzy again. He cut too deep and I'm losing a lot of blood. "Now," he says again as he pulls my arm away and he pushes me back. I look down at my arm, feeling faint as I try to press my hand against it to stop the blood flow. "Heal her," I hear him say dismissively as he throws more things into the potion.

A small figure comes over to me and when their hood falls back, I gasp at Bellatrix Lestrange and her demented looking face.

"You are such a lucky little girl," she says wistfully as she mends my wounds and cleans off the blood. "So lucky," she whispers again before going back into formation.

I don't feel lucky.

After a few moments of stirring and chanting, I suppose the potion is done, because he takes out the goblet again and dips it into the boiling pot.

"A toast is in order, I think," he says snidely as he looks at me and he raises the goblet. "To Ginevra Weasley, my very own fountain of youth," he says with a smirk before downing the potion.

It makes him twitch and he cracks his neck as the potions settles within his body. Someone comes up and starts pouring the left over potion into a set of silver containers and wheeling them away as the Dark Lord hunches over and makes odd noises that sound like he's dying.

No one moves though, and no one moves to help him. I wish he would just die, but of course it doesn't and when he settles down and faces me again, he looks a little more real, a little more human. The waxy, almost melted look on his face is gone. He looks more firm, younger, and his skin is a shade darker, like a normal skin tone... his lips have a hint of color now too. There's also something else about his appearance that makes him look less like a monster and more like a man, but I can't put my finger on it and when he walks towards me, he smiles again and takes my hand, bringing it up to his face.

"See," he says as he looks into my eyes and he rests my hand on his cheek. His eyes are still red, but not as cat like in appearance. "Warm," he says with a small smile. "Your blood is important," he says as he lets my hand drop. "And it will help me rule the world."

I swallow hard as the other people in the room clap like they just witnessed the most amazing show.

He smiles again.

"Someone please escort Miss Weasley back to the castle and make sure no harm befalls her," he says out loud to the robed figures. He looks back at me. "I will see you again," he says, touching my hair once more. "And you will be prepared for me."

I swallow again, but I can't say anything like a coward as one of the Death Eaters comes up to me and takes my arm.

I let myself get dragged away. I don't even care what happens to me. I feel like a zombie. The cloaked figure Apparates us just outside of Hogsmeade where the opening to Draco's passageway is and I don't even have it in me to act confused.

"Do you see, Ginny?" I robed figure says and I shoot my eyes up in surprise as he pushes back his hood.

Draco.

"Do you see why I've done what I've done?" he says as he takes my arm and start kissing my wrist where the wound used to be. To be honest, I'm relieved he's here. He makes me feel safe. "Do you see what I'm saving you from?"

"D-Draco," I stutter out like an idiot and then I lunge at him, hugging him around the waist as I think of that poor unicorn and Delsia. "That was the scariest thing I have ever seen," I whisper into his cloak and he kisses the top of my head.

"He's a madman," Draco says and I look at him in surprise. "And his blood isn't even pure," he adds and I furrow my brows.

"So," I say softly. "What are you going to do?" I ask as I think about his careful planning. "Why have you done all of this?" I ask, gesturing to the bracelet he gave me.

He sighs loudly before giving me a critical look. "I need Potter and his friends to keep doing what they're doing," he says and I'm confused so I tilt my head. "The Dark Lord doesn't plan on claiming you right away so we have time before he finds out about our marriage. He will be angry, but there is nothing he can do about it because the magic is so old. He will never be able to touch you intimately as long as I'm alive," he reassures me as I blink back tears. "He will never be able to plant a child inside of you. Our bonding will not allow it, but he will still be able to take your blood. As your head of house I can forbid you to give it to him, but he'll find a different way. He will use force if he has to. You saw him in there," he says gently. "He needs it to keep going. The potions last him a month and he has to take it everyday to be stabilized in the kind of body that he desires."

"Why do you need Harry to keep doing whatever he's doing?" I ask in confusion and he looks at me for a few long and hard moments before speaking.

"I have plans, Ginny, but I can't do them on my own," he says seriously. "I need something from you."

"Okay," I say with a head nod. "What is it?"

"The Dark Lord plans on taking your blood whether you want to or not," he says as he searches my eyes. "I'm asking that you give it to me willingly."

I feel my shoulders slouching. "Why do you need my blood too?" I ask suspiciously. I didn't know it was so damn special, to be honest.

"Because," he says as he brings his hand up to my face and he touches my cheek. "I'm going to kill the Dark Lord, Gin," he says and I widen my eyes in surprise. "And you're the key to doing that."

_You're the queen, baby. _

Blaise's words ring in my head as Draco looks into my eyes like he was trying to see my soul. After a few moments, I nod my head slowly and he smiles a beautiful smile before he kisses me.

I sleep in Draco's room that night and I fall asleep with a dark twisted feeling in the pit of my stomach, like a monster that's lurking in the dark.

_You're the queen, baby. _

The thought is constantly repeated in my head throughout the course of the night as I fall in and out of sleep. I wake in the morning to Draco's fingers between my legs and his warm lips against my ear telling me how much he loves me.


	12. Chapter 12

"Draco," I whisper as I lick my lips. "Did you kill that woman?" I ask uncomfortably. "That Dorothy Whitewater woman all the papers are talking about?"

"Would it change your opinion of me if I did?" he asks coldly with his hand between my knee and I run my lips over his cheek.

"That answers my question, I suppose," I say because I don't want him to come out and actually confirm my suspicion. Dorothy Whitewater was a bad person anyways... she deserved whatever happened to her I'm sure, but I don't want to think of Draco as a killer. He's my Draco and I love him... he can't kill people with the same hands he touches me with. "I saw her picture in your folder," I admit to him. "It had her address on the back...That's why I ask."

"You read through the whole thing?" he says sharply and I nod my head.

"I didn't understand any of it," I admit in a small voice.

"It was written in french," Draco confirms my suspicion as I lay my head on his shoulder. We're back in his room after a rather long and tedious day of classes. I'm sitting sideways on his lap with my arm wrapped around his shoulder and my lips against his neck like the annoyingly clingy girlfriend I've become.

I've been all over him like a pitiful thing after coming back to the castle a couple of days ago. I'm too shook up to let him go, to be honest. My encounter with Lord Voldemort had frightened me to the bone and I hate being alone now... no matter how brave I try to be. I'm so afraid that Tom Riddle will come in and swoop me away before I even know what hit me and I will have no way of stopping it. Draco is the only person who can make me feel safe here and I'm taking advantage of his constant invitations to be by him.

I like being by him anyways, so it's not too much of a chore.

"My family is french," he says softly and I nod my head as he taps his fingers against my thigh. I kiss his cheek and run my nose along his skin as I sift my hand through his hair. He smiles. "You are being awfully affectionate today," he says with a laugh in his voice as I put my hand on his chest and run my lips over his jaw. "Not that I mind," he adds with a playful smile. "You just seem to be touching me a lot lately."

"I'm just..." I trail off uncomfortably as I stop nuzzling him like a lost puppy. "I just like being close to you," I admit in a small voice. "I'm scared all the time."

I'm sure other people would feel the same way if the Dark Lord wanted to marry them and take their blood. Sometimes, when I'm walking to class by myself, I fear that he'll come and snatch me away when I least expect it. It makes me shudder to think of what I would have to do with him.

"Don't be," he says shortly as he turns his face down to look at me. "I fix things," he says and he gives me a small smile. "I can fix this."

I chew on the inside of my cheek and nod my head as I look away.

"Will you tell me about it?" I ask gently as I place a kiss against his neck again, letting my lips flutter around his skin. "Explain what was in that folder? What your Prometheus project is and why you had photos of those Death eaters?"

He pauses for a few moments before sighing loudly. I sit up straight so I can look into his stormy eyes. A long lingering sigh is never a good sign.

"What is it?" I ask carefully as I bring my hand up to his chest again, letting my fingers slip between the buttons so I can feel the softness of his undershirt.

I can feel his heart beat. It makes me feel better.

"I don't want you to think I don't trust you or value your intelligence," he says and I frown. That doesn't sound very good. "But I don't think it would be prudent to tell you anything right now."

His refusal hurts me and it makes me think of Ron and his friends. I always find myself in this situation, being pushed aside and guarded from key information. It ticks me off. I go to get up, but he holds me down on his lap.

"Don't," he says softly before pressing his lips to my temple. "Don't be angry," he says quickly as I clench my jaw.

He pulls back so he can study my face with his eyes shining against the candle light.

"I'm just trying to be honest with you. I thought you would be better at Occlumency by now, but I fear you may never master it," he says and my cheeks heat in embarrassment because I don't like not being good at something. "You're too emotional and you wear your heart on your sleeve," he says and I furrow my brows. "It would be dangerous for everyone involved if the wrong person got into your mind. You already hold so many of my secrets and I can't risk anyone finding out any more."

"I can try harder," I tell him because I want him to tell me everything. "I've been practicing blocking my mind and everything, Draco. I swear."

He nods and smiles sadly at me like I was a child. "I know, babe," he says and I frown even deeper. "But it's not good enough," he says and I feel disappointed in myself, so I look down and shake my head because I don't agree with him.

"You're unprepared and undisciplined in that area," he tells me and I feel like he's grading my performance in a very critical way. "And you're constantly wide open for anyone to have at," he says and I make a face at his wording. "I caught you thinking about what I said to you during breakfast this morning," he says and I snap my eyes to his. "You didn't even notice me reading your thoughts and you were too caught up in your emotions over me telling you my plans for the Dark Lord that you didn't even bother to throw up a weak shield just in case someone looked in."

"But..."

"I know you're trying," he says as he tucks some hair behind my ear. "If Rookwood or Umbridge read your thoughts this morning, I would be dead and branded a traitor," he says and I feel guilty, so I look away. "I can't risk it," he tells me like it would hurt my feelings. I guess it does in a way. "My plans are too important."

"I'm sorry. I didn't even know," I say as my cheeks heat again in shame.

"I know you didn't," he says softly. "You're being watched now," he says and I look at him in surprise. "The Dark Lord has taken a particular interest in you and because of that, everyone in his inner circle is interested as well," he says and I shiver a bit as I remember my encounter with the new and improved Dark Lord. "A lot of people will be trying to get into your head," he says and then he tightens his jaw. "I don't want to have to wipe your memory of our past encounters that show my treason," he says and I give him a worried look.

"Don't," I tell him pitifully and he squeezes my thigh. "I'll get better at blocking my mind. You don't have to do that."

"I won't," he says. "But with the limited information you have, you have to bury it deep and keep it protected," he tells me with a serious tilt on his lips and I nod my head. "Please refrain from thinking of me murdering the Dark Lord over your toast."

"I'm sorry," I say again because I don't know what else to say.

"When things calm down, I swear I will tell you everything. I can't now, and I'm sorry for it."

"It's alright," I say with a tired sigh as I put my head back on his shoulder and I press into him a bit more. "No one ever tells me anything anyways," I state bitterly as I think of Ron and my family. "It's nothing new to me. No one thinks I can handle things... and I guess that's true," I admit in a shameful whisper.

"I don't think that," he says and I give him a disbelieving look as he brings one of my hands up to his lips and he kisses my knuckles. "You're just up against something so much bigger than yourself that there is no choice. I don't think you're stupid, or too young, or too naïve to handle things," he says and I'm thankful for it. "I just have to cover all my bases."

"So you can't tell me anything," I say and he nods his head. "But you can tell Pansy and Blasie and everyone else in your little clique?" I say harshly and I try to tone down my defensiveness, but I honestly can't.

"In our society, we learned at a very young age how to survive in a world like this," he says and I make a face. "Life was always very complex and games were constantly being played," he says with a tight jaw. "But it was part of our upbringing and we all know how to maneuver things in our favor . All of them are bound to keep my secrets safe."

"What does that mean?" I ask and he gives me a look, like I should know he couldn't tell me. "If I work harder at Occlumency, will you tell me more?" I ask hopefully.

He sighs again.

"You can keep trying." he says. "But I honestly don't think you'll be able to achieve the kind of level I will need you at, especially against Voldemort," I blush again and look down. "There's nothing wrong with that," he tells me as he tilts my chin up. "In fact, it might even be a good thing," he tells me gently and then he places a sweet kiss against my lips. "You're just a simple little country girl," he says with a little smile.

I'm not sure if I should be offended or not.

"And everyone has greatly underestimated you," he tells me with a smile curling on the corner of his lips. "_He_ will underestimate you," he says as he searches my eyes. "And we will all be the better for it."

I try to be understanding and I nod my head again, letting him kiss me once more. He lingers a bit longer this time and I lean into his chest with my arm pulling him closer. He brings his free hand up to my neck to hold me in place while he deepens the kiss with his tongue against my lips. He tastes like mint, he must have brushed his teeth when he went to the loo.

Then the compact vibrates.

I pull back and look at his writing desk were I had placed it. "Looks like your boyfriend is calling," he states bitterly and I give him a look before slipping off his lap and grabbing the compact.

I go to walk out of the room, but Draco's on me in a second, blocking my path. "What are you doing?" I ask as it shakes in my hands.

He raises a sharp eyebrow and glances down at the compact with disdain. "Is there anything you'll be talking about that you don't want me to hear?" he asks coolly and I furrow my brows.

"You have your secrets," I tell him softly and he tilts his chin up and stares me down. I sigh. "Fine," I say gently as I walk over to his bed and I sit down. "Just don't hover around me the whole time, please," I tell him sharply. He goes back to the loveseat and he takes out a book to read with an unhappy sneer on his face.

I eye him for a few more moments before sitting back by the headboard and clicking open the compact. I smile when I see Harry and then I send another look to Draco. He's watching me, and when we make eye contact, he raises his brows again. I let my smile fade and I turn back to Harry, trying not to seem too pleased to see him.

"How are you doing, Gin?" he asks with a small smile. He's pleased to see me as well.

"I'm fine," I tell him in a whisper and I look at Draco again. He's reading his book with his jaw ticking. I pull my knees closer to my chest and I rest the compact on top of them. "How are you?" I question.

"As good as I can be, I guess," he says and I nod my head.

I want to tell him about my meeting with Voldemort and about my blood, but I feel odd with Draco in the room listening.

A silence falls between us and Harry coughs awkwardly before trying to speak again. "So... he says uncomfortably and I bite my lip, painfully aware of Darco. "Is there anything new with you?" he asks seriously. "Have you gotten in trouble for the paintings?" he asks because I had told him about my artistic vandalizing ways.

I hear Draco make a noise and when I look at him, he's glaring at a page in his book.

"No," I say quickly as Draco shakes his head, letting me know he is listening to everything I'm saying. "No, but, um, Snape knows it was me," I admit. "He caught me out after hours and saw the paint on my hands. He just gave me a regular detention, though. I don't know why the punishment wasn't harder."

"That is strange," he says seriously. "I wonder why? I'm glad he didn't punish you further, though," he says gently. "Didn't you say the Carrows are using unforgivables?"

I nod my head.

"That's terrible," he says with a head shake and then he looks at me through the magic mirror. "I wish I could see you again," he says in a gentle voice. My cheeks flush and I avoid Draco's gaze. "I caught Ron and Hermione holding hands this afternoon after a close call. Someone recognized me," he admits in a sad voice. "We had to Apparate quickly... It's just them and me," he says with frown. "I feel..." he trails off awkwardly. "I'm very lonely," he admits like it was shameful and I give him a sympathetic smile. "I'm grateful for these talks."

"I'm glad," I tell him softly and I can practically feel Draco's heated gaze on me. "I understand why you feel lonely," I add because I have nothing else to say with my boyfriend in the room. "I hope everything works out."

"I'm sure it will," he says in a whisper. "I hope it will," he adds softly. He licks his lips. "I was wondering..." he trails off and I frown.

"What were you wondering?" I ask and he furrows his brows.

"I was wondering if..." he trails off like it was paining him to say it. "Hermione says I'm always such an idiot when it comes to this kind of thing," he says as he tugs on his hair. Draco stands, but I ignore him. "I want you to know something," he says as he looks into my eyes. "I need you to know something just in case something happens."

"What is it?" I ask uncomfortably because I'm pretty sure I know what it is. Hermione did tell me that he liked me.. he can't possibly be admitting it to me right now. Not with Draco in the room,

"Ginny... I'm...I..."

Draco takes the compact from me and snaps it shut. "Hey," I say as I get up on my knees to snatch it back from him, but he holds it out of my reach.

Damn him and his tallness.

"What do you suppose he had to tell you?" he questions lightly with a raised eyebrow.

"Give it back," I tell him hatefully as I stand up on the bed so I can get it from him. He dodges me and puts it in his pocket.

"No," he says as he starts walking backwards. I glare and jump off the bed to get it from him, my height putting me at a disadvantage. "What do you think Harry Potter was going to confess to you just now?"

"I don't know," I hiss and I lunge at him when I get close enough. He slides to the side and keeps walking around to avoid me. "You cut him off before he could say anything! That is so rude, Draco!"

"I think I know," he says hatefully. The compact starts to vibrate against his pocket and he narrows his eyes. "My patience can only be stretched so thin," he tells me harshly and I make a face.

"Give it back."

"Why?" he says harshly. "What do you have to say to him? Why do you have to talk to him? He was never your friend before."

"That's not true. We were always friends!" I yell in annoyance and he glares.

"That's a lie and you know it," he says as the compact shakes inside of his slacks.

I'm so mad that I go to tackle him, but he grabs my hands and I wrestle around with him until we both end up on the floor. The carpet burns the skin on my elbows, but I'm too angry to care. I grab for his pocket, but his strong hands hold me away and he actually starts laughing at me!

"Ginny," he says with a snicker in his voice as I try to fight with him. "I'm a lot larger than you, my love. You won't be winning this fight."

"Don't call me that when you're being a bastard."

"Bastard?" he says, still smiling in amusement as I try to get my hands out of his firm grasp. "I'm hardly a bastard. You're just trying to make me jealous," he says and then his voice drops to something more serious and dark. "And you know how jealous I get," he says sharply before rolling on top of me.

I try to struggle a few more times before I realize that I'm not actually fighting anymore... he's just holding me down and I'm struggling like a fish out of water. I sigh in defeat and level him with a hateful glare that I hope burns his soul as I relax my body.

"Let go," I tell him as I try to tug my hands from him again. He rolls off of me so I can breathe, but he doesn't let go of my hands.

He laughs as he throws his leg over mine to keep me trapped. My hair falls in front of my face and I blow some of it away in frustration.

"So you can try to tackle me again?" he says with a handsome smile. "I think not."

"You win," I grumble and he finally loosens his grip enough for me to move away.

"I usually do," he says smugly and, when my right arm is free, I take a swing at his arm.

"It's not funny that you're stronger than me," I tell him with a whine as my fist hits his bicep. I try to tug away from him again only to have him pull me closer.

"Hey now," he says with another laugh because my punch hardly hurt. I take a deep breath and lay my head against the carpet as I glare up at the ceiling. "Don't be hateful."

"You're hateful all the time," I tell him harshly. I look at him from the corner of my eyes as he relaxes and props himself up by his elbow so he can smirk down at me.

"That's not true," he says gently as he pushes the hair out of my face. "I'm kind of sweet to you," he tells me with a grin as he runs his thumb down my jaw and over my lips. I narrow my eyes.

"Why did you take that away from me?" I say as I nod to his pocket. "You know I like knowing what's going on with my brother and his friends."

"But Potter never tells you what they're actually doing, does he?" he says seriously, his eyes slightly narrowing. "Your brother never calls you. He doesn't care. Potter's only calling on you so he can have a back up if he survives the war," he says with a head shake as he places his hand on my stomach and starts playing with the hem of my shirt.

"What does that mean?"

"Look," he says as he slips his hand under my shirt. I suck in when his fingers skim across my midsection. It kind of tickles, but I don't want to laugh, so I put my hand over his and I use my other hand to prop up my head so I can see him better. "He's only now noticing you because he thinks he might die," he says and I shake my head. "It's true. He had no one else and you're here willing to comfort him. You're a sure thing to him, Gin."

"That's obviously not true," I tell him with an eye roll. "He knows you're my boyfriend."

"I'm sure he expects you to go running to him once he tells you he loves you and I'm sure the thought has crossed your mind," he says and my cheeks turn red as I turn my body towards his so his hand moves to the curve of my side. "Isn't that what Granger thought would happen when she told you he liked you?" he says and I frown.

I don't even bother to ask how he knew about that.

"Everyone expects you drop everything and go to him when he says, don't they?" he says and I bite my lower lip. "But you won't because you love me, right?"

"Of course," I whisper as I stare into his eyes as I lean closer to him. His breath ruffles my bangs and I prop my head up so I'm mirroring his stance.

He studies my face with his sharp silver eyes lingering on my lips.

"Then why do you want to talk to him?" he asks as he takes the compact out of his pocket and he hands it to me. I sit up Indian style on the carpet and put some hair behind my ears. He lounges in his spot like a spoiled cat.

"I guess..." I blink a few times... How did he turn the conversation in his favor? A part of me still likes Harry. I doubt that will ever go away, and when I was mad at Draco, I kind of toyed with the idea of being with Harry again, but it never felt right... I just wanted to keep the door open just in case. "I mean, he's my friend."

"But you know he likes you," he says as he lifts and eyebrow.

I nod my head and look down.

"So, you are either leading him on or you plan on leaving me for him when he saves the world. Is that it? Are you going to leave me?"

"No," I shake my head as he plays with his watch. "No, of course that's not it."

"Then you're leading him on."

"No, I'm not... I just..." I trail off. Damn, I don't know what to say. Am I leading him on by allowing him to talk so gently to me and not discouraging his compliments and smiles? I knew he liked me... was that wrong?

"Then you don't need to talk to him every night," he says seriously. "You can talk to me. I'm sure I'm just as interesting."

"But... I..." The compact starts vibrating in my hand and I look at Draco.

"Go ahead," he says with a sharp brow raised. "See what Potter wanted to tell you, but I think you know already," he says as he pushes himself up. He stands and walks towards his bed. "By all means, take your time," he says hatefully as he starts unbuttoning his shirt.

I stare at him for a few moments before carefully clicking the compact open. Harry looks panicked.

"Jesus, Gin!" he says with his breath heavy. "Are you okay? You left so abruptly I thought something terrible must have happened."

"No, I'm sorry, Harry," I say and I look over my shoulder once to see Draco taking off his watch and laying it on the nightstand. "I just... it was nothing." I lie.

"Good," he says with a sigh. "So, anyways... I wanted to tell you that I-"

"Harry, I have to go to bed," I cut him off quickly before he says what he has to say.

"I... what?" he says in confusion and I sigh loudly.

"I'm sorry, but I have to go to bed. We'll talk later, yeah?"

"Um... yeah... I guess that's okay," he says in disappointment and I give him one last apologetic look before closing the compact and cradling it against my chest.

"Come here," Draco says gently from behind. He pulls me to my feet and makes me face him. "You are a good girl," he says with a pleased smirk as he tilts my chin up and he places a kiss on my lips. "Now," he says with a sigh as he steps back to give me room. "Did you bring your potions essay? I can edit it before you turn it in tomorrow," he says as he starts unbuckling his belt.

"I left it in my room," I admit uncomfortably because I feel odd about the way I treated Harry.

Was that the right thing to do?

"Go get it," he says as he slips out of his button down, leaving him in his thin cotton undershirt. I hesitate a second as I think about walking down the hallways by myself and when he notices my pause, he raises an eyebrow. "What is it?"

"Will you walk me to my dorm?" I ask in an embarrassed whisper and he gives me a sympathetic look.

"Of course," he says as he buckles his pants back up and he slips into his shoes.

I put the compact in my bag, and I stare at it for a few moments. I hope I didn't hurt Harry's feelings. That would make me a terrible person.

We walk down the hallway and up the stairs together with Draco's firm hand planted on my waist. We pass by a group of re-educated students who are walking in single file from the library. I stare at their dead eyes for a few moments before looking away with a heavy feeling on my chest. I feel like I failed Neville.

I _did_ fail Neville.

I'm a terrible person.

"What is troubling you?" Draco asks and when I glance up at him, he raises his brow. "You're frowning," he adds as he touches the corner of my mouth with his knuckle. "I'm sure you're not thinking of Harry Potter, are you?" he asks softly and I shake my head.

"It was nothing," I whisper before facing forward again.

When we get to my dorm room, Draco leans against the door frame with his arms crossed as I go to my trunk to retrieve my homework folder. Ivy Parkingson and Astoria Greengrass are sitting on their beds listening to music as I rummage through my things. When they notice Draco, they both sit up straight and Ivy turns off her record player.

I roll my eyes and shuffle some sweaters aside as I try to find my stupid red folder.

Where is the damn thing?

I stop when I see the maroon sweater my mother had knitted me last year. It has a golden G stitched to the front of if it.

For Gryffindor and Ginny, she had said when I opened it for Christmas. For George the Great my brother had added and everyone laughed. I blink a few times as I remember the time with my family and a sad feeling settles in my heart.

I miss them.

I'm dangerously close to crying, so I fold the sweater over my arm as I push things around so I can find my folder.

I jump when I feel a hand on my shoulder, and when I look up, I see Draco hovering over me with a concerned look on his face.

"Here," he says gently as he bends down. Of course, the folder was right on top of everything. How did I miss that? "I've got it. Now, let's go, yes?" he says softly and I nod my head.

I let him take my hand and stand me up and I trail slightly behind him as we leave the dorm room. I look over my shoulder once to see Ivy sit by Astoria and whisper something in her ear. Probably something unpleasant about me and I frown again before facing forward and looking down at my shoes as I use my free hand to fiddle with the necklace my mother gave me.

I hope they find me some day.

The stairway is quite small and I find myself even further behind Draco as he jogs down the stairs. When he stops abruptly, I run into his back and drop my sweater.

"Oh," I hear a female voice and I pick up my sweater with a sigh. "Oh, hi Draco."

Daphne.

My face snaps up and I look around Draco's strong body to see Daphne on the other side of us, looking nervous as she stares up at my boyfriend. He's a few steps above her, so his height is even more intimidating. He doesn't say anything and I put my hand on his shoulder so I can gently push him to the side so I can step around him.

"Hey," I say gently when I'm standing by Draco on the step. I feel guilty for the way I had treated Daphne and I haven't had a chance to tell her yet. "How's it going?" I ask as Draco snakes his arm around my waist, resting his hand on my hip in annoyingly possessive way. Unnecessary for the situation, to be be frank.

"Good, good," she says with a fake grin as her eyes flick to Draco again who has yet to move or make a facial expression. "Are you good?"

I don't say anything. I just take another step down. It makes Draco drop his hand. "I wanted to apologize to you, Daphne," I tell her seriously. I lick my lips nervously. "I shouldn't have taken advantage of your kindness and I am very sorry for using my wand to curse you," I tell her. I feel uncomfortable with apologies, but I'm trying my best. "I hope you can forgive me for my terrible behavior towards you."

I only have so many real friends and I fear Daphne might have been the only person I could talk to within Draco's circle.

She looks a little stunned, to be honest, and then she shakes out of it and lets her bright eyes slide to Draco again. She snaps her jaw shut and nods her head before leveling me with a large fake smile.

"Of course I forgive you," she says as she takes a few steps up until we're close and she pulls me into a hug. I awkwardly pat her back. "I can understand why you acted the way you did," she says against my hair and then she pulls back. "If my family was in jail I'm sure I'd go a little crazy too," she says with a nervous laugh and I give her a sad smile. "Just warn me before you stun me next time," she says with a laugh. "It hurts my back terribly."

I fake laugh.

"So, we're good?" I say and she nods her head.

"Good," she says with a smile and then she looks at Draco. "Now, I must go to my room. If you two will just excuse me," she says as she slides past us in the narrow stairway. I watch her walk the rest of the way up to the seventh year girl dorms and when I turn back to Draco, he's glaring at me.

Of course.

"What?" I ask as he grabs my arm and starts steering me away. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"You shouldn't have apologized to her," he says flatly and I make a face.

"Why not? I cursed her when she was just trying to help me," I explain. "I owed it to her."

"You don't owe her anything," he says coldly. "We don't apologize to people, Ginny. They apologize to us and she fucking owes one to you." I raise my brows at how angry he is about this.

"But..."

"But nothing," he hisses and when we reach the hallway, he's practically dragging me. "She put you in a lot of danger."

"I put myself in danger. She was just helping me-"

"Fuck her," he says and I gasp at how mean he's sounding. "Do you realize what would have happened if the Dark Lord decided he wanted you that night?" he says and then he glares at me.

He glares at me a lot.

"Do you realize how hard it was for me to convince him to wait on you," he says and I stop walking.

"What do you mean?" I ask and he shakes his head before dragging me the rest of the way to his room.

He finally lets go when the door shuts behind us and I rub my arm.

"What do you mean you had to convince him to wait on me?" I say seriously and he sighs as he throws my folder onto his bed and he starts unbuckling his belt again.

"When he found out about your blood, he wanted to take you away right then and there," he says and I feel my hands shaking, so I stop them. "He's old," he admits. "In his time it was normal for girls to leave Hogwarts to marry older men, especially pureblooded girls," he adds and I shiver a bit. I even cross my arms. "My father and I convinced him to let you finish your education," he says seriously. "We told him an uneducated witch is hardly a witch at all, but the other night, at Folk Hills, he could have taken you then if he wanted and that would have been Daphne's fucking fault."

"When did he find out about my blood?" I ask seriously and Draco spares me a glance before pulling his slacks off, leaving him in his boxers. "How long have you all known?"

"It doesn't matter," he says and I make a face at his back. He crawls on the bed and rests against the head board as he pulls my folder to him.

"It does matter to me."

"We went over this earlier," he snaps as he shoots me a look. "I will tell you things when it is safe for me to do so. Until then, get ready for bed."

I make a face at him before stomping towards the bathroom. Freaking jerk. I take a long warm shower as I think it over. If Draco knew I had this weird magical blood for a while... is that why he was with me? Is that why he wanted me. I didn't like thinking about it, but I couldn't stop myself. After getting clean, I toweled off and slipped into a pair of clean knickers and the maroon and gold homemade sweater I had taken from my trunk. I bring the sleeve up to my nose and inhale. It smells like home... I know what Harry means when he said that now.

I miss my home.

With a sigh, I brush out my wet hair and put it in a braid before going back into the bed room where I find Draco two pages into my potions essay with his annoying red grading quill in his left hand as he marks things down with an agitated look on his face.

"You wrote defiantly like three times when you meant definitely," he says in annoyance as I sit down on the loveseat so I can put on a pair of gray wool socks. It's getting colder during the nights in the castle. Fall is coming. "It's irritating," he adds sharply and I shake my head.

"Hermione gave me auto correct quills for my birthday," I say honestly as I roll a sock onto my right foot. "They work really well, until they auto correct the wrong word I wanted to spell."

"Well, this is defiantly wrong," he says and I smirk at his joke before letting it fall. I forgot that I was worried about him.

I stare at him as he works through my paper and after a while, I bite my lip and walk towards the bed. "Draco," I say to get his attention. I start at the end of the bed and I begin crawling up his body.

He takes notice rather quickly and he watches me over the top of my paper as I make my way up his body. The sweater is loose enough to hang down, giving him a pretty good view of my breasts. "Yes?" he says with darkened eyes and he places my paper against his chest when I straddle his lap to sit.

"Do you love me?" I ask seriously as I place my hands on his chest for balance.

He smiles. "What a silly question to ask," he says as he puts a hand on my bare knee. "You know that I do."

"Is that the truth?" I say with a worried frown and he smirks before placing my paper on the nightstand by his watch.

"Of course it is, my darling," he says and it would have sounded so corny if it hadn't been Draco the one saying it. "Why do you ask such a question?"

"You aren't with me just because of my blood or anything like that, are you?" I ask in concern and he shakes his head as he places his hands on my thighs and he starts running upwards, pushing up my sweater as he goes.

"I'm with you because I love you," he says as he sits up a little bit. It makes my stomach turn wonderfully when he says things like that, and I smile at him. "And you're smart and sweet and as sexy as hell," he says before leaning up to kiss me. When he pulls back, he takes my sweater with him. Pulling it over my head like I was a child until I'm left in my knickers and socks. "And you smell amazing," he says as he attacks my neck with kisses and bites.

I place my hand in his hair to keep him there and then my eyes linger on my maroon and gold sweater that he threw on the floor.

"Draco?" I say as he runs his hands up and down my back.

"What?" he asks in a deep voice as he starts sucking on my ear. That's a sweet spot of mine and it goes right between my legs. I close my eyes and collect myself before slightly pushing him back. "What is it?" he asks with a frown.

"Will you take me to the Burrow?" I ask and he makes a face.

"What's the Burrow?" he asks in annoyance and I sigh.

"My home," I tell him and his face softens as he leans back. "Can you take me to see it? Please?" I add for good measure and I kiss his cheek. "I know they said the Death Eaters really did a number on it... but I would really like to see it again."

He slumps against the headboard and he stares at me for a few long moments.

"Please, babe," I say as I lean into him and wrap my arms around his neck so I can kiss him again. "I would really like to go there." I tell him gently to try to convince him to do as I want. I lick his lips and he smiles a bit. "I would be very inclined to make love to you more enthusiastically if you honor my request," I say as I grind myself against him more firmly. I can feel his arousal between my legs, so I know what he wants.

He laughs. "That was a mouthful," he says as he leans back his his hands on my hips. He runs his left hand up to cup the side of my breast as he studies my face.

"Will you?" I ask softly as I grab his hand and bring it up to my lips. I kiss his fingers. "You are the only person who can help me."

"When?" he asks. I put his hand back where it was and I lean down to kiss his lips so I can convince him.

I look at the sweater again.

"Now," I say, holding my breath for the answer. "Please?"

He puts his hand on my thigh again and taps his fingers against my skin before looking into my eyes.

"Please?" I whisper again as I bite my lower lip and settle myself right on top of his erection.

He looks into my eyes for an intense moment before bringing a hand up to my chin and studying every freckle on my face.

"Only for a little while," he says after a lifetime and I smile as I hug him tightly. "Get dressed," he says as I pull back to give him a grateful smile.

"Thank you, my love," I say to him and I smile because it sounded awkward coming from me, but I don't care.

I jump off of him and run over to my bag. I hook on a bra and throw on a dress quickly because I'm so excited I might burst. I sit down on the loveseat and bite my nails as I wait for Draco to get ready as well. All he has to do is put on pants and shoes, but he's taking bloody forever. I put my chin in my hand and tap my foot against the floor as he walks towards his dresser to pull out a pair of jeans. It takes him a few moments to sort through them and I roll my eyes as he picks a dark washed pair from the very back.

They fit him well, and I shake my sexy thoughts away because I'm going to see my home! He puts on a brown belt and grabs a pair of leather desert boots from his closet. He's taking forever to tie them and I stand up and slip on my shoes before I start pacing. He goes to his closet to pick out a shirt to throw over his undershirt and I frown at his back because he's taking forever.

"Just pick the blue one," I tell him harshly as he sorts through his closet, going back to a blue shirt and a green polo like he couldn't decide which to wear. "We're not going where anyone will see us anyways," I snap and he gives me a look before choosing the green one. Serves me right, I guess. "Thank goodness," I say as I run to the door and I wait there as he pockets his wand and puts his watch back on. "We're not having a fashion show, Draco. Come on."

"You know," he says as he walks towards me. "I don't have to do this for you at all. You should be a little more grateful."

I roll my eyes.

He makes the Slytherin boys leave the common room and when he opens the passageway, I nearly start skipping down the tunnel. That is, until he grabs me and forces me to walk beside me.

"Do not go anywhere out of my sight," he says firmly in my ear and I nod my head.

"I won't," I tell him because I'm too pleased to care.

When we get to my home, my knees nearly buckle when I see it.

The Burrow is half destroyed and I catch a sob in my throat as I stare at it from behind our gate. Windows are blasted through and the kitchen section in the front of the first floor had been burned to it's frame. I cover my mouth and my eyes sting with painful tear. I didn't realize this would effect me so and I just stare at it for a few long moments before opening the gate.

It falls over.

It makes me a cry a little harder.

I carefully walk towards my childhood home, barely believing what I'm seeing is real. The roof has a few large holes in it, curse holes, that show the guts within the house and there are scorch marks all over the yard. Why? Surely all this spell work wasn't used just against my mother...

"Are you alright?" Draco asks as I walk into the house.

The door was blasted off it's hinges and I shake my head because I am not alright at all.

Every good memory, every pleasant thought, and every new feeling that I ever had in this house just seem to be falling apart with the debris on the floor.

Most of the things are missing in our living room. The vases, the silver candle sticks, the painting over the fireplace that my great aunt made when she was a teenager... it's all gone. It looks like the house had been looted and anything of value was taken... everything that was left was turned over and destroyed. My heart is hammering in my chest and my ears are ringing as I walk around my house. It feels like a dead house now, a ghost house.

It doesn't feel like home anymore.

With tears freely falling down my face, I make my way up the dilapidated stairs. The photos that hung on the wall are still there, but most of the frames are off kilter and the glass is broken. I take one of the smaller family photos that was taken last summer and I take it out of the broken frame. I stare at the smiling faces of my entire family before rolling it up and holding it under my arm so I can take it with me.

The upstairs isn't in better shape. All the rooms are in disarray and there are holes in the floor. I'm shaking by the time I reach my bedroom, and I carefully push the door open.

My poor room.

My bed it split in two and the vanity mirror is broken into a thousand different pieces. My lower lip trembles as I walk further into the room and look around with a heavy feeling in my heart. This had been my bedroom since I was a baby, my own sanctuary no matter how shabby it was, and here it is now, totally ruined. There's a pink stuffed animal by my foot and I look down at it with tear blurred eyes. It's a stuffed cat toy that I had hid in my closet when Draco started coming over so I didn't look like a pathetic little girl.

I pick it up and then sit in the middle of the room, cradling it to my chest as I stare at the wall ahead of me.

I don't know how long I sat there, rocking back and forth like a crazy person, but eventually Draco did come to me and sit behind me, wrapping his arms around my middle. I cried for a while after that with him holding me until he said my name, snapping me out of my pity party.

"Gin," he says against my ear. "It's getting late," he says, nodding to the window with the broken panes of glass. "We have to head back."

"Where will I go when the school year is up?" I ask. It was a stupid question to ask. I knew there were a million other pressing matters I needed to sort through, but all I could think of was how I no longer had a home and once this madness was over... I didn't know where I would go.

"With me," he says simply as he kisses my ear and his left hands plays with the bracelet on my wrist. The bracelet he gave me... the bracelet that further cemented our bonding. "Always with me," he adds and I wipe the snot off with the back of my hand. I nod my head and let him pull me up. "When we get back, I'll make you feel better, yes?" he says before kissing my cheek.

I know he's talking about sex and I blink out a few more tears before following him out of my bedroom. Sex actually doesn't seem like a terrible thing right now... I need to feel close to someone. I need to feel connected with him and I pull him close as we walk down the stairs.

On the way out of the house, I pass my family's famous clock.

It's cracked down the center and the face looks like it had been burned by fire.

I glance at it in passing, realizing as Draco pulled me away that all the hands were missing but mine.

* * *

"I don't even know why Draco let you try out," Millicent says hatefully as she throws her broom in one of the lockers. "It's wasting everyone's time."

I glare as I take off my shin guards.

Hogwarts didn't have house Quidditch teams anymore, instead they were holding try outs for a school team that would play other magical schools in Europe. I guess the Dark Lord wanted to further his reach through sports before taking over the other empires. The thought pisses me off and I throw my shin guards in the bag after I get them off.

I just want to play Quidditch, to be honest. It's something I'm familiar with... something I'm good at that reminds me of my old life.

"You know you're not going to play, right?" she hisses by my side.

I try to ignore her. They had the try outs for the chasers today and I was stuck with Millicent in my group every time to the annoyance of both of us. She's not a very good flier, but she always did well on her house team in the past because she was always so big. Brute force can go a long way, but now she weighs less than I do, making her utterly pointless.

"You're just bitter," I tell her as I sit down to take off my riding boots. "I'm a better flier than you."

"It doesn't matter what you are. Draco isn't going to let you play," she says snootily and I glare at her.

"Draco doesn't have a say in my sports life, thank you."

"Draco has a say in everything you do," she tells me as she pulls her hair out of her pony tail and brushes it out with her fingers. "Don't kid yourself."

I shake my head and go back to ignoring her as I take off my chest protector and arm guards. I can't help myself thought, after a couple minutes of silence, I throw my gear down.

"You know what, Millicent," I hiss and she looks at me through narrowed eyes as I take off my goggles. "I don't like you very much," I tell her and she laughs.

"You think I care?" she says as she goes back to taking off her uniform.

"I just want you to know I think you're a terrible person."

"Oh, ouch, Weasley," she says with her hand on her heart. "Really, that hurt."

"I can give you something that will hurt," I tell her boldly, but she laughs again.

"Honestly," she says with a head shake as she goes back to her bag. "What has gotten into you? Draco loosen the leash a bit?"

"You know what I think," I put a hand on my hip. "I think you're such a bitch because Draco loves me and not you," I tell her and she raises an eyebrow. "Get over it. It's pathetic," I say and she gives me a cruel smile.

"I've never wanted Draco's love," she says in a bitter voice. "I wanted him, yes, but for other reasons. I would never want to be loved by a person like him."

"Yeah, right," I say as I pick up my heavy gear bag and I hike it over my shoulder. "Say what you want."

"You have no idea," she says with a head shake as she picks up her bag as well. "People like him treat the people they love like possessions," she says and I roll my eyes. "Like a toy that they play with until it breaks. You're that new shiny toy, Weasley," she says, taking a step closer to me. "And he's going to play with you until you break into a million pieces, but you can never get away from him like the rest of us. You're bonded for life."

I glare. Does she know about our bonding too?

It seems I was the last person to know.

"You'll just be another broken thing to add to his collection."

"I'm stronger than you think," I tell her in a cold voice and she smiles.

"No one's as strong as him," she says. "You're done, Weasley."

"Millie, shut up," Pansy hisses from over my shoulder and I glance at her in surprise.

We haven't spoken since I confessed that I snogged Zabini.

Millicent rolls her eyes before walking off, and once she's gone, I go to walk away too.

"Wait Ginny," she says and I stop and glance over my shoulder. She's still in her full riding gear and her goggles are on top of her head, pulling most of the hair out of her face. She's a pretty decent chaser, actually. "I wanted to talk to you."

"About what?" I ask callously and she narrows her eyes before taking a step closer to me.

"I don't know what you think of me now," she says as she levels me with a cold gaze. "But I want you to know that my friendship is always open if you want it," she says and then she inhales deeply. "And I want you to know what I do not hold any resentment over the kissing my boyfriend situation. I know that you did it to upset Draco, but in turn you had greatly upset me," she says and her hand tightens around her broom handle. "But... I know I must get over it because my problems do not match yours."

"Did he tell you to say that to me?" I ask with a brow raised.

"Who?"

"You know who," I say as I think of Draco.

"I'm not a mindless puppet," she says and then she narrows her eyes. "So there's that. I want to be friends again."

"Okay," I say slowly and she raises her brows.

"Okay? That's it?"

"I don't have anything else to say," I admit and she glares. "I have to take a shower."

With that I walk off, and Draco catches me outside as I'm walking back towards the castle. "You flew well," he says as he takes my bag and adds it to the large one he's carrying. I cross my arms, thankful that I don't have to carry the heavy gear anymore.

"You did well too," I tell him with a little smile. Draco was trying out for the seeker position and without Harry here to beat him, he was easily the best person on the pitch. "I think you're a shoo in," I tell him and he smirks at me.

His usually perfectly combed hair is wild from his workout and I smile fondly at him and his flushed cheeks. He's so good looking it's not fair.

"Of course," he says pompously as he takes a drink from his water bottle. He hands it to me and I take a drink as well. Arguing with Millicent has left me thirsty. "Where are you headed?" he asks once we reach the castle.

"I'm going to take a shower," I tell him seriously as I screw the lid on the bottle

Since I was made prefect after our test scores were released, I am able to use their amazing bathroom. That's one nice thing about it.

"I feel gross," I admit because it started raining halfway through our tryouts and now I smell like a wet dog. "Did you see Millicent try to push me off my broom?" I say in annoyance and he nods his head.

"I saw," he says darkly and I shake my head.

"I hate her," I say and he looks at me with a brow raised. "I haven't done anything to her and she's the biggest bitch to me," I hiss as I remember our conversation in the changing room.

"That's because she's jealous of you," he adds flatly and I shrug. "Pretty soon you are going to have everything she's ever wanted."

"I just think she's evil," I say and he laughs.

When we get to the stairways leading up to the prefect bathroom I want to use, I stop and make a motion to Draco to give me my bag.

"Why don't you take a shower in my room," he says with a sinful smile as he takes a step closer to me. "Take one with me," he adds as bends down to kiss me.

"I won't get clean if I take a shower with you," I tease and he smirks when he pulls back.

"But it is immensely more fun."

"I've been spending so much time in your room," I say as I put my hand on my neck. "What if one of these days we get caught? Girls aren't allowed in your private dorm."

He shrugs. "It hardly matters," he says. "I can talk my way out of anything. It's one of my many charms," he says with a smirk and I smile as I shake my head.

"Fine," I say with a long suffering sigh. "You talked me into it," I say with a laugh and he wiggles his brows.

"I always do."

"Don't be smug," I tell him as I take his arm so we can walk the opposite way to the Head Boy dorm.

On the way there, though, that old woman named Odette who took over the infirmary after Poppy quit calls my name and I turn around with a brow raised as she scurries over to me.

"Miss Weasley, you must go to Mr. Rookwood's office immediately."

"Why?" I ask as I send a nervous look to Draco.

"Your blood," she says. "You need to make a donation today."

"But..." I trail off. Didn't I just do that?

I swear I gave my blood a week ago.

"No, buts," she says. "Rookwood's office, now."

She walks away and I glance up at Draco. He's looking terribly serious now. "I'll walk you," he says and I nod as I start walking towards the old Death Eater's office on the second floor.

Draco and I walk in silence, but before I can open the door to Rookwood, Draco drops the bags he's holding and grabs my chin, forcing me to look at him.

"Keep your mind guarded," he says and I nod my head as he grips my chin so hard it hurts. He searches my eyes with an intense gaze and then he licks his teeth. "Ginny, as your head of house I forbid you to allow Rookwood to take your blood. You will be obedient to me," he says levelly and I feel something tickle in my brain. "Do you understand?"

"Yes," I say mindlessly and he nods his head before letting his hand drop.

I shake my head when he steps back. What was that all about and why do I feel so strange now?

"Now, go inside," he says and I nod my head before turning to the door and gently opening it.

Rookwood is sitting at his desk with a pair of glasses on the bridge of his nose. He has a syringe in his hand and he's staring at the needle. "Ah, there you," he says with a smile. "Take a seat."

I walk towards the chair and take a careful seat.

"I know we just made a donation a few days ago, but it seems that we need more blood," he says as he stands up and walks around his desk to get closer to me. "I know you don't mind."

Bastard.

He takes a cotton ball and dips it in some disinfectant stuff before pushing up my shirt sleeve and rubbing the substance over one of my veins.

"Wait," I say as I feel that prickling in my brain again. "Wait, don't."

"Don't be foolish," he snaps before lifting the needle to arm.

I smack it out of his hand and it goes flying across the room. "No!" I scream like a mad person as I jump up and plant myself against the wall. I don't know why it feels like life or death if I let him take my blood. I don't even feel in control of my own feelings right now. "No," I say again, blinking back tears.

Why am I acting like this?

"Now, Miss Weasly, you know you must do this," he says as he uses his wand to retrieve the needle. "You have a very important role and you must fulfill it. Now, stop being this way."

"No, you can not have my blood!" I yell and he cringes before lifting his wand to me.

"I am too old for this," he mutters before shooting a curse at me.

It's an unforgivable and I can feel my body hand over it's free will as I relax and slump against the wall. "Come here," he says flatly and I walk towards him like a zombie. "Sit down," he says as he slicks back his hair.

I take a heavy seat and stare ahead of me, trying to see through the fog in my mind.

"Give me your arm," he says and I throw out my arm towards him. "Good," is all he says as he walks towards me and he holds my forearm in his free hand. "Now, after this you can go back to your room and take a nap, yes?" he says and I nod my head.

"Good," he whispers as he puts the needle to my skin.

I feel it, and I wake up with a vengeance. "No!" I scream again as I jump up. "Stop it!"

"What in the hell has gotten into you?" he snaps in exasperation. I don't know the answer to that question either... I just know that I _have_ to do as Draco says. "How did you break my curse?"

"You can't take my blood," I say as I cross my arms. "He said no."

"Who said no?" he asks and I clench my jaw shut.

"My husband," I say and he lifts his eyebrows.

I widen my eyes and clamp my hand over my mouth.

_Why_ did I say that?

"Husband?" he says flatly and I nod my head.

_Stop nodding your head, idiot!_

He gives me a critical look before walking towards the fireplace and throwing some floo powder in. He sticks his head into the flames. I can't make out anything he's saying, but when he's done, he goes back to his desk and two second later someone comes through the fireplace in a flurry of black robes and crimson flames.

_Him. _

"Is it too hard for you to handle a teenage girl, Rookwood?" Tom says in a slithering voice as he lifts his wand to rid the floo powder from his body. He looks more human again, less like a monster and more like a man but when his red eyes fall on me, I realize he's not a man at all. This is like my worst nightmare, him coming back to Hogwarts to get me. Where's Draco now? "What is the problem here?" he asks as he walks towards me with his leather soled shoes tapping against the floor. I fall into myself and try to make myself as small as possible. "You know how much I detest being interrupted."

"My Lord, she has become hysterical and won't allow me to take her blood."

"Has she?" he says when he's standing right in front of me and he gives me a thoughtful look as he touches a strand of hair that has fallen in my face. "You smell bad," he says and my cheeks turn crimson.

"I had Quidditch try outs," I mumble out in embarrassment. Why do I care if he thinks I smell bad? What kind of person points that out anyways?

A terrible person, that's who.

"Hm," is all he says as he lets my hair drop and then he gives Rookwood a sharp look. "You have age, power, and size on your side. How is it possible that you needed to summon me for something so small," he says in annoyance and I shiver at his tone. "I have better things to do, believe me."

"She told me that her husband said she couldn't give her blood and then she broke my imperious curse," Rookwood says as he places his hands on the desk. "I thought you would like to know that considering everything that's happening with undesirable number one." Harry! "You know how close her family has been to him... and we found that picture of her at their last hide out."

They had a picture of me? That's kind of sweet.

Wait... do they think that Harry is my husband?

"Her husband," he says and then he looks back at me. He laughs. "Do you have a husband, little Ginny Weasley?" he asks but I don't say anything. "I hardly believe that," he says as he brings a hand up to my face and he grabs my chin. "But let's check, shall we?"

He starts sorting through my mind like he was reading a book and my eyes start watering as I attempt to bury a few memories that would incriminate Draco. He focuses mostly on my time with Harry and when he sees a memory of me using the compact to talk to him, he pulls out and smiles at me.

"Give it to me," he says and I shake my head. "Don't act that way towards me," he says sharply. "Because very soon, I will be your head of house for real and you will have to listen to me," he says and I nearly sigh in relief because he didn't see anything in my mind about Draco. "You always have it with you," he says looking down at my riding pants where there's a bulge in my pocket. "Give it to me now."

I shake my head and blink back tears as he glares at me.

He reaches into my pocket himself and pulls it out. For some reason it made me feel very violated and I step back and cross my arms over my chest protectively once he has it. He looks at the compact like it was the most fascinating thing in the world before smiling at me. "I could have you tortured for treason," he says and I gulp. "But I am in a forgiving mood today," he says and I sigh as I slump my shoulders. "I won't always be that way, mind you," he adds in a hiss and I shiver.

He takes a step back and opens the compact, staring at it from every angle with a curious tilt of his brow.

I take his preoccupation with the object to actually study his face. I've never seen a body built by magic and it is a wonder to behold, I suppose. Like something born form a nightmare that has no business actually _being,_ he seems frightening for some reason. He looks more like Tom Riddle than I remember from before at Folk Hills, but everything just seems a little... _off._.. I don't know how else to describe it.

He's like a picture slightly out of focus that hurts your eyes if you stare at it for to long. I furrow my brows as my eyes dance across the curve of his nose and the bow of his lips. He even has a five o'clock shadow on his face right now and I find that curious for some reason so I tilt my head to the side as he taps the compact with his fingers. He has longer fingernails than I do and I find that disgusting but they seem odd somehow, like they were made of glass instead of nail.

I look back at his face and I wonder if he ever shaves.

It seems ridiculous to imagine the Dark Lord shaving, to be honest.

When my eyes travel to his long pale fingers again, his eyes snap to mine and I look away quickly like he caught me doing something terrible.

"Your boyfriend is trying to kill me," he says and my throat goes dry at the thought of what he saw in my mind before.

Maybe I missed it, maybe he did see Draco. I close my eyes and shake my head. I know I shouldn't think such thing right now!

"But Harry Potter will never be able to hurt me," he says as he taps the compact and I sigh in relief again because Draco is safe. "He is merely a boy and I am the most powerful wizard in the world."

Modest too.

"And I will triumph in the end. It is true, my Ginny," he says as he brings a hand up to my hair and he pulls so hard it rips a few strands out. I whimper and bring my hand up to my scalp to deaden the pain as he places the hairs inside of the compact. He snaps it shut. "He has had limited success, but the closer he gets to destroying me, the stronger I get with your blood," he says as he takes my arm and he pulls it to him. "So, you understand why I must have it," he says and he snaps his fingers.

Rookwood appears beside us with the needle and he hands it to Voldemort before disappearing again.

"When the silly uprising is dead and I am secure in my power and leadership," he says as he places the needle to my skin. "It will be known all across the world how helpful you had been in squashing the resistance."

I let a tear slip out as he pushes the needle into my arm and he starts drawing blood.

"You'll be a Queen, Ginevra," he says and I shake my head. "Isn't that what every little girl dreams about?"

"It's not what I dream about," I whisper as I watch my blood fill up the vial.

"Hm, then what do you dream about?" he says and I cringe at the sweet way he's speaking to me.

Tom in the diary used to speak to me like that, right before he tried to kill me.

"I dream about dead bodies, and blood, and snakes," I admit as I think about my nightmares and he snaps his red eyes to mine.

Then he smiles. His teeth are still rimmed in black.

"I believe you and I are more alike then you know," he says and I shudder as he removes the needle. "Now, I am a busy man," he says as he hands the syringe to Rookwood and I put my hand over the wound. "And I will not be coming back here again to calm you if you decide to act up. So, Rookwood, you have my permission to use more creative curses if she tries to refuse her blood again," he says and a chill goes down my spine. "Is that understood, Ginevra?" he says leveling me with a cold gaze. I nod my head. "Good, then you know not to act this way again."

He walks towards the fireplace with his cloak swishing behind him and when he gets closer to the fire I can see the silver buttons from his waist coat shining against the light. I don't know why I noticed that, I guess it's just because I don't want to look at his face anymore. I watch him with dread in my heart as he grabs a handful of floo powder and turns his head slightly towards me, making his black hair fall over his brow.

"If I have to come back here," he says as he turns back to the flames. "Everyone in this room will be sorry," he says and Rookwood and I exchange a worried look. Good, I'm glad he's afraid too. "I want a closer eye watching her from now on," he says to Rookwood, who nods his head. "I would to hate to pull you out of school," he says as he looks at me again. I nod my head because I want him to leave. "But I will if you push me to it, and trust me, you will not find your living arrangements as comfortable with me as they are here."

He goes to leave and he gives Rookwood one last look before Rookwood bows his head. "My Lord," he says and then Tom's red eyes snap to mine.

I don't know what to say so I look away.

He doesn't move, he just keeps staring at me, and I glance at Rookwood whose head is still bowed. He snaps a glare at me like I was doing something wrong, so I panic and mimic his action with my hands folded in front of me.

"My Lord," I say awkwardly and I nearly choke on the words.

They make me want to vomit.

I glance up once to see Tom staring at me with a pleased smirk on his face and then he's gone with a flick of the flames.

Once out of the room, Rookwood and I both sigh out loud.

There's a moment of relieved silence before he speaks.

"You should have just given me your damn blood," Rookwood hisses with a clenched jaw and then he walks back towards his desk. "Get out of my sight."

I don't need to be told twice and when I leave his office, Draco is standing right outside of the door. The look on his face tells me he heard everything.

"Good girl," he says as he brings his hand up to my cheek and he kisses my forehead. "You blocked your mind so well."

"But he saw Harry," I admit as he pulls me away from the door. "He took my compact... and some of my hair. I think he's going to use a polyjuice potion to look like me and find out where Harry is," I say worriedly as I rub my scalp where he painfully pulled out my hair. That would be the only reason someone would take my hair, after all.

"It doesn't matter," Draco says and I frown at him. "Potter and his friends have been doing their job," he says with a smile and when I make a confused face he smirks at me.

"What?"

"I wondered why he needed some blood from you so soon after your last donation," he says as he brushes some hair away from my face. "He's dying, Ginny," he says in a soft voice so no one can overhear. "And very soon you will be the only thing keeping him alive and his body stable," he says and I make a face. "And you belong to me," he says and I look down.

He smiles again and tilts my chin up.

"That means the scales just shifted," he says. "I have something he wants...needs."

"I'm not a thing," I whisper softy and he kisses my lips.

"Of course you aren't," he says gently. "But you are the key to his success... and you're mine."

I don't know why, but I'm not comforted by that.

"Draco, when I was in there and Rookwood tried to take my blood, I was acting odd. Not like myself..." I trail off uncomfortably.

"Because I told you not to," he says flatly as we start walking back to his room again. I cuddle up beside him because I'm still shaking from my encounter with Voldemort.

"I know you did, but I felt like I wasn't in control of my actions. I was acting like a crazy person."

"Ginny," he says as he stops walking. I look up at him as he shifts our Quidditch bags. "The bonding spell we used was very old," he says and I furrow my brows. "Very old and very patriarchal. When I order you do something like that, you are obligated under magic to listen."

I hate that thought and I untangle myself away from him. It doesn't seem fair.

"Does that work both ways?" I ask softly and he glances at me.

"What do you think?" he asks and I shake my head angrily.

"But... what if he was going to curse me with something painful?" I say as I think of what Tom said about using more creative curses.

I don't like that Draco has that power over me. The Imperious curse is an unforgivable for a reason and it seems like that is pretty damn close.

"He couldn't at that time," he says like he knew all of this. "That's why he asked the Dark Lord to come. I got the information that I needed, so this worked. I wouldn't use it against you lightly," he adds like it would make me feel better. "I just needed to see if I could get more information than what I already had."

"What if he saw my thoughts about you, Draco?" I say with my brow furrowed in worry. "He went through my memories like they were nothing. If he chose to look for you, I wouldn't have been able to stop him."

"It was a chance I would take," he says as he brushes some hair away from my face. "But he wasn't looking for me, so this worked. I got what I needed."

"At my expense," I say bitterly and he glances at me again.

"Yes," he says flatly. "At your expense."

I glare at him, but I let him pull me to his room anyways, falling against him with a sigh as we take a shower together.

I don't want to be alone. I'm pathetic.

"I wouldn't actually let anyone hurt you," he whispers as he washes my shoulders.

I turn around and look at him as the water beats down on his back.

I'm not so sure I believe that and that worries me.

* * *

They tagged the list of names to the bulletin board outside of the Great Hall.

I stand in front of it and run my eyes down all the names. All the people who made the Quidditch team this year are written in a neat script with their position beside their name. I recognize a few names on his list...

Draco Malfoy- Seeker

Pansy Parkinson- Chaser

Blaise Zabini- Keeper

Cho Chang- Chaser

Millicent Bulstrode- Chaser

I frown when I read the other names on the list. Some of them from Ravenclaw, most of them from Slytherin, one or two of them from Gryffindor and Hufflepuff... all of the pureblooded.

I shake my head at the thought and go back to scanning the list.

I don't see my name.

I stand and stare at it for half an hour, reading and re-reading the names before I feel a fire in my veins. How could I not make the team! I was better than most of those kids out on the pitch that day! Especially freaking Millicent! It doesn't make sense. I glare as I hike up my bag and I head towards Snape's office. I have no idea who to talk to about this Quidditch business so I'm going to him.

I need Quidditch. It's the only thing familiar to me here.

When I get to his office, I bang on his door until he lets me in with an irritated scowl on his face.

"I hope there is an emergency of some kind to have to pound on my door such a way, Miss Weasley."

"I didn't make the Quidditch team," I say as I step into his office and he raises his brows.

"How unfortunate for you," he says. "You can leave now."

"Wait," I say before he can push me out. "I'm really good," I say and he rolls his eyes.

"Perhaps the other students were better. It's a bitter lesson we all must learn some time, I'm afraid," he says coldly as he walks back to his desk. I follow him and he raises his brows at me as he sits down.

"I'm an excellent flier and I'm a great chaser," I tell him fiercely. "I'm better than half the kids who made the team. It doesn't make any sense! It's not fair."

"Life is not fair. It's good for you to figure it out early."

I stomp my foot and he glares at me. "No, it doesn't make sense. Please Headmaster," I say, hoping to butter him up. "My family is in Azkaban. This is all I have," I say with my hand on my chest as I lean against his desk. "I need this."

He eyes me for a few long seconds before leaning back and pressing the tips of his fingers together.

"Have you thought, Miss Weasley, that you did not make the team because someone simply requested that you not play?"

Draco. No, he wouldn't do that. He knows how much I love Quidditch.

"I have it under good authority that you are already aware of who you are to be bonded with once you graduate," he says and when his eyes find mine, I gulp. "So you know the influence such person can have. It is my understanding that your benefactor would prefer you focus on academics instead of sports," he says and I open my mouth to protest, but he keeps going. "And it is preferred that you not get involved in anything that is so dangerous. Why put such a high priced commodity in harms way?" he says as he motions to me and I feel the color leave my cheeks. "You know as well as I do that there is no arguing with this decision and you will be compliant to your benefactors wishes."

"But..." I let my back slump to my elbow. "But that is not fair."

"A lot of things are not fair," he says seriously. "Now," he lifts a stack of papers to sort through. "Leave my office."

I stare at him for a while before turning around with stiff steps and walking away.

At least it wasn't Draco. Millicent had been wrong on that front. With a disappointed sigh, I walk towards the Great Hall for breakfast and I glance out one of the windows in passing. It leads to the courtyard and I see Dean sitting on one of the benches by himself. I stop and stare at how sad he looks and then I bite my lip before rerouting my steps.

I haven't talked to him forever.

When I reach the courtyard where he's sitting, he looks up quickly and when he sees that it's me, his shoulders relax and he looks back down.

"Hey, Dean," I say softly as I take a seat beside him on the bench, placing my bag on the ground. "How's it going?"

"Not very well," he says to his hands and I scoot a little closer to him.

"What's wrong?"

He sighs loudly before looking me in the eyes. "You aren't one of them, are you, Ginny?" he asks and I furrow my brows.

"One of who?" I ask seriously and he shakes his head.

"Malfoy, Parkinson, Zabini, and the rest of the Hitler youth in there," he says as he nods towards the castle.

Dean was raised by a muggle mother and I knew the reference from my muggle studies class. I knew who Hitler was and it hurts that he would ask me such a thing.

"Of course not," I whisper. "I want Harry to succeed."

"Then how can you hang out with them and act like nothing's wrong?"

"I know things are wrong," I say gently. "And maybe they're not as bad as they seem," I say as I think about Draco. "Even they know right and wrong," I add and he laughs a hollow laugh.

"Right," he says sarcastically and then he leans his elbows on his knees. "They took Seamus away," he says and I raise my brows.

"What?"

"Seamus kept on getting in trouble for talking back in class," he says as he sends me a look. "Of course, you wouldn't know anything about it because you're in your high end pureblooded classes," he adds bitterly and I frown again. "He kept on mouthing off to the Carrows and they gave him detentions where they actually used unforgivables against him," he says with a tight throat. I reach out and take his hand. I've always liked Dean and it hurt me to see him so upset. "They finally sent him for re-education this morning. He's going to come back a mindless shell like Neville and the rest of them," he says angrily as he grips my hand.

I'm surprised it doesn't burn, but I'm not actually touching him in any sexual way, so it's good.

"Isn't there anything we can do?" I ask because I realize I've been terrible and I haven't even thought about it. "I mean, to get them back to themselves or something?"

"Hell if I know," he says angrily as he brings a hand up to his forehead. "I didn't even try to stop them when they came for him this morning," he says and I look down because what was I doing this morning? I was all pissed off about not making a stupid Quidditch team.

It pales in comparison.

"I'm a coward," he says and I shake my head as I put my arm around his shoulder and I grip his hand with my left hand. "I didn't even move because I was afraid," he says. "Because I didn't want them to take me too."

"I'm sorry," I say and I seem to be saying that an awful lot. I kiss his temple to calm him just because I feel like I should and I rub his back. "Everything is so backwards," I admit with tears in my eyes when the weight of our situation sinks down on me.

"Yes," he says as he squeezes my hand again. "It is. I don't know what to do," he says softly. "If Harry doesn't succeed... I don't know what I'll do."

"He will," I say seriously, firmly. "And he's not alone," I say seriously as I think Draco again. "I think you'd be surprised who's on his side."

I don't know if you could label Draco and his friends as being on Harry's side... but they're both against Voldemort, so that's a start.

"Maybe," he whispers and then I hear footsteps approaching, so I look up.

"What are you doing?" It's Draco and I pull back quickly like I was doing something wrong and I mentally scold myself for it. I'm not doing anything that needs to be hidden. Draco just puts me on edge when he looks at me like that. "Am I interrupting something?" he asks coldly and I shake my head as I stand up.

"We were just talking," I say softly because he looks so angry.

I would roll my eyes if I wasn't desperate for his affection all the time.

"Talking about what?" he asks seriously and I glance at Dean.

He stands up. "I'll see you later, Gin," he says before squeezing my arm and walking off.

Once he's gone, I turn back to Draco. "Well, what were you two talking about?"

"Nothing really," I say with a shrug. "Just about life."

"Life?" He hisses and I nod my head. "Life is so rough that you had to hold him like that?"

"It wasn't like that, Draco," I say as I glance up at him. "And yes, life is rough."

"But you kissed him?"

"Yes," I say with a sigh. "But I was comforting him. You don't have to be so upset about it."

"Who says I'm upset?" he says and I give him a look. "My girlfriend was only out in the open, cuddling with a half-breed."

The way he said 'half-breed' makes me cringe.

"Some girl named Romilda Vane told me that you were out here flirting with Dean Thomas," he says with narrowed eyes. I glare too. Freaking Romilda. "She has one of the biggest mouths in the school and now everyone will know that you're stepping out on me."

"That's just ridiculous," I say with an eye roll as I put my hands on my hips. "I am obviously not cheating on you. You would have felt it."

"It doesn't matter, everyone else will assume you are because of the way you were acting and the fact that Thomas is an old boyfriend of yours. It makes me look like a fool, Ginny."

"I was just talking to him," I say as I motion to the bench where we were sitting. "Again, you would be able to feel it if I was doing anything inappropriate. I obviously wasn't and everyone else can go fly a kite for all I care if they choose to believe that I would cheat on you. My skin didn't start burning Draco, so I know that spell you put on me didn't even recognize it as cheating."

"The implication is enough," he says flatly and I narrow my eyes.

"You never even let me out of your sight, Draco! There is no way I could possibly cheat even if I wanted to."

"Shut up," he snaps and I clench my jaw shut. "I don't want to see you talking to him again."

I sigh loudly. "Draco, they took his best friend away," I say seriously as I take a step closer to him so I can win his sympathy for my friend."He's upset, if you can imagine."

"Well, I'm upset now too," he says and I glare at him. "Will you comfort me now?" he asks spitefully and I clench my fists. "You can't just talk to whoever the fuck you want now and I had better not see you touching him like that again," he snaps and I feel my heart thump.

"Or what?" I ask with a hand on my hip and he gives me a cold look.

"You don't even want to know," he says flatly and I repress a chill as I try to keep the glare on my face. I don't want him to 'order' me to do anything, so I keep quiet when I just want to smack him again. "We're going inside now," he says as he walks towards me and grabs my hand roughly. "This conversation is over."

"Are you upset that I was out here with Dean, or are you upset that other people told you before I did?" I say as I think about something Zabini had said to once when I was trying to get information out of him.

"A little of both, to be completely honest," he says as he pulls me into the castle. "I don't enjoy being the last to know."

"Join the club," I reply harshly and he gives me deadly look.

"We're not talking about this again," he says sharply and I roll my eyes.

"Whatever," I mutter under my breath because he can get ridiculous sometimes .

I have no intention of actually going to the Great Hall with him, not while I'm this angry, but I don't want to be by myself so when Daphne comes running up to me with a bright grin on her face, I see my chance to escape. Her eyes flick to Draco as I push myself away from him.

"I've been looking all over for you," she says and I give Draco a glare so he'll leave.

"Come into the hall when you're finished," he orders, glaring at Daphne and I roll my eyes.

He sneers and walks past us, leaving me with her with a angry tilt of his brows.

"Ginny!" she says and then she hugs me. It was awkward again because I wasn't ready for it and I watch Draco's back as he walks into the great hall. Stupid jerk face. "I'm so sorry that you didn't make the team," she says, giving me mock sympathy.

"So, everyone read the list?" I say and she nods her head. We're talking about Quidditch now, Quidditch is safe. Quidditch isn't scary.

Quidditch takes my mind off the fact that I just handed over one of the only contacts with Harry Potter to the Dark Lord.

I feel physically ill when I think about it, so I try to brush it off.

"I don't play either," she says as she links her arm with mine and starts walking me towards our table. "They're doing something new this year, though," she says with a pleased look on her face. "Because our team will be traveling on the weekends, they wanted cheerleaders too."

Oh, no.

"And of course I'm going to do it. Try outs are in a couple days. I was thinking we could do it together. I already saw the uniforms. They're the cutest green and black things I've ever seen and I think it would be terribly fun. You know, most schools have cheerleaders for their Quidditch teams. Hogwarts was one of the only places that never did."

"That's because cheerleaders are pointless. Especially for Quidditch where the stands are almost touching the clouds."

She bats away my logical comment as she takes a seat. I hesitate a second before sitting down next to Daphne, right across from Draco, who's having a discussion with Blaise. I'm still mad at him, of course, but I know if I'm by him the Dark Lord won't come and take me. That's weak... I know it is. I glance at Zabini before I sit and he quickly looks away with a scowl on his face.

Good riddance.

"It will be fun and you'll get to travel with the team," Daphne says from my side as she fills her plate with food. "And you're pretty. We can't exactly have trolls on our team," she says, sending a wary glance down to a rather overweight girl at the end of the table.

I glare at her because that wasn't necessary, but she ignores it.

"I'm just not into that kind of thing," I admit. I like dresses and make up and looking pretty, but I wasn't _that_ kind of girl.

"Ginny," she says and I see Draco staring at me from the corner of my eyes as I pick a peach from the table. "You won't be doing anything else. It's not like you're playing the game."

My cheeks heat in embarrassment and I look down angrily when I catch Millicent staring at me with a gloating smirk on her face. I can feel Draco staring at me too, so I give him a nasty look that I hope hurts him.

He narrows his eyes and goes back to his meal.

"Draco," Daphne turns her attention to my boyfriend and he looks at her with an irritated sigh. "Since Ginny is no longer on the Quidditch team, I thought that she could try out for the cheer squad. Isn't that a lovely idea?"

"He doesn't control what I do," I state and when I look at him, he's giving me a bitter smile.

"I think you'd look wonderful in a short skirt," he says and I glare.

"I don't want to be a cheerleader," I say sourly. "I want to play."

"We don't always get what we want," Pansy says sharply from the other side of Daphne and I glare at her before going back to eating my peach.

"I think you should do it," Draco says seriously as he leans across the table, his bitterness momentarily gone. "That way you can travel with us so you won't be alone on the weekends," he says and I give him a worried look.

Yes, I suppose that is true.

I frown as I take a bite of the peach.

"Are you sure it's not too dangerous?" I ask sharply. "My benefactor might not appreciate it," I hiss and he gives me a look before going back to talking to Zabini with a shake of his head like I annoyed him.

Well, good, because he annoys me too.

No one says anything after that.

I eat the rest of my breakfast in silence and Draco walks me to my first class with out saying a word to me. I don't even care. I make it through the day with out much excitement, but Luna has seemed a little off in all of our classes together. To be honest, she's always a little odd, but she seemed a little more out of it today. When it's time for herbology, I've decided that I'm going to talk to her. We've stopped having things to talk about because she's changed so much from being with Theo, but I think now would be a good time to ask her a few things.

I hesitate a moment before walking into the greenhouse and when I see her sitting at her desk, I bite my lip and walk towards her.

"Hey Ginny," she says softly, sadly and I give her a look as I take my seat.

"Are you okay?" I ask carefully because she looks like she's been crying.

She nods her head and wipes her eyes.

I make a face and lean towards her.

"Hey, what's wrong?" I ask as I put my hand on her arm and she gives me a pitiful look.

"Theo broke up with me," she says and I give her a sympathetic look even though I'm actually quite pleased.

"Why?" I ask, trying not to sound too happy.

"Do you promise not to tell anyone?" she asks as she looks around at the other girls in the class.

I nod my head and she takes a deep breath before continuing.

"When we would fool around," she whispers and I make a disgusted face. I don't want to hear about his and I pull my hand back. "He wanted me to take a polyjuice potion to look like someone else, but I told him I didn't want to do it anymore."

"Oh, I'm sorry," I say as I blink a few times. I guess she did mention that once, but I was too horrified hearing about her sex life that I didn't bother to learn more. That's kind of fucked up. "Who did he want you to look like?" I ask uncomfortably and she gives me a look before looking away.

"I can't tell you," she whispers and I place my hand back on hers.

"Luna, you can tell me anything, you know that."

She shakes her head. "You'll tell Draco and he'll tell everyone and everyone will be mad at Theo and everyone always does what Draco says so if you're mad, then Draco will be mad, and then Theo will get hurt."

I sigh. "I promise not to tell Draco," I say as I make a cross over my heart. "I swear."

She doesn't say anything for a few seconds and then she licks her lips as she stares at the texts on the top of her desk.

"Blaise Zabini."

"What?" I say flatly and she gives me a sad look.

"Blaise Zabini," she says again and I make a disgusted face. "That's who he wanted me to turn into."

"What... but... I thought Theo was straight?" I finish uncomfortably and she nods her head.

"He likes women, he was just curious and Blaise is almost pretty like a girl," she finishes and I feel like I might vomit. "He gave me a potion that made me look like Pansy once so I know he's straight," she adds like it helps.

"If he's curious then he's not straight," I point out and she nods her head sadly. "And you actually... did it with Theo in Blaise's body?" I ask and she nods her head. I bring my hand up to my mouth and shake my head. "That is just wrong, Luna. Why would you do that?"

"I don't know," she says. "I thought it was a one time thing but he kept asking me to do it and I thought eventually he would just want me...you know?" she says but I have the disgusting visual of Blaise and Theo having sex in my head. "But the last time, when I refused to take the potion, we tried but he couldn't..." she trails off. "So he broke up with me. He said it didn't matter anymore anyways because he got what he wanted and no one would make him see me anymore."

Ugh.

"I'm very sorry that happened," I tell her seriously. "That is terrible."

"It's okay," she says and then she starts balling like a baby.

"Shh," I say as I pat her back and look around at all the kids who are staring. "It will be okay. You're better off."

"But," she blubbers as snot drips from her nose. "But I love him!"

"Sh," someone says from behind us and I glare at Romilda Vane before going back to my friend.

"I know," I tell her gently. "But one day you will realize how wrong he was for you. He's a creeper anyways."

"And my Dad is in Azkaban," she says and I know that so I nod my head. "And Theo never even cared. He said my Dad was crazy. My father is not crazy," she tells me as she looks into my eyes. "A little bit weird, but not crazy."

"I know," I tell her as I pat her back.

"Do you think, if I apologize he'll take me back?"

I make a horrified face. "Why would you want him back? He sounds terrible. Luna," I grab her hands. "You deserve better."

"And you deserve better than Draco," she says with a sob. "But that doesn't stop you."

I sigh. "That's different," I say and she shakes her head.

"Maybe it's worse," she says and I roll my eyes because I know that's not true. "He controls everything you do. He manipulates everyone around him and Theo said that he's just going to get worse. He has so much power over you, Ginny."

"That's not true," I say softly because she's confused. He has never made me change into someone else to get off... but... he is awfully stubborn when he wants to get his way.

I think about how angry I was with him this morning and the sharp way he was speaking to me after seeing me comfort Dean... I shake my head. No, it's totally different.

She nods her head anyways. "Yes, it is. He controls who you talk to, who you sit by, what you wear, how you speak..."

"No, he doesn't," I snap because that's not true.

"I've noticed, Ginny," she says seriously. "You've changed since you started dating him."

"No, I haven't," I hiss as I lean back. "You're the one who changed."

She shakes her head sadly, but before she can reply, Sprout comes into the green house and starts her lecture. I ignore her the rest of class, but when we get out, I see Theodore Nott in the hallway talking to Millicent and I glare at both of them before I decide I'm going to tell Zabini about what Luna told me.

I promised not to tell Draco, but I didn't say anything about Zabini.

A part of me does feel bad for betraying Luna's trust but I can't just let Theodore Nott do something that disgusting to my friend with out some retribution. He took advantage of her love and now she's heartbroken in the worst way.

Yes, I'm definitely telling Blaise.

I doubt he'd appreciate it.

I avoid Draco, who's waiting for me at the bottom of the stairs, and I turn down another corridor so I can speak to Blaise. I find him outside of his common room with a toothpick between his teeth and when he sees me he rolls his eyes before walking the opposite way.

"Wait," I say as I speed walk to catch up to him. "I have to talk to you."

"No, you don't," he says over his shoulder.

I make a face at his back before I start running to catch up to him. When I finally get close enough, I grab his arm and spin him around. He looks pissed, but I don't care.

"What do you want?" he hisses as he throws my hand off of him like a jerk. "You have already caused me enough trouble."

"I'm sorry," I say, not meaning it as I take a step closer to him and not caring if that was the truth. "I have to tell you something about Theodore Nott," I tell him and he raises an eyebrow.

"Tell Draco," he says flatly, before trying to walk away, but I slide in front of him.

"You'll want to know this," I say seriously. "He broke up with Luna," I say quickly because I know I will only have his attention for so long.

"Oh, how heartbreaking," he says sarcastically with his hand on his heart. "I'm glad you told me, now goodbye." He goes to walk away, but I grab his arm again and he throws me off like it burned him. "_Stop_ touching me," he hisses. "Go tell your goddamn boyfriend and leave me alone. He lets you get away with so much," he adds like it was unfair.

I glare and ignore his hateful tirade.

"He broke up with her because she refused to take a polujuice potion anymore when they were having sex."

"As kinky as that is, I find no one in the equation attractive, so where is this going?" he snaps at me and I blink for a moment before shaking my head. I can't believe how mean he's being to me. Zabini has always been kind of jerk, but he was usually halfway decent. Now he's acting like something terrible will happen to him if he acts like a decent human being.

"Well," I lick my lips. He stares at my lips for a few moments before shaking his head and glaring at me. "He would have her take a potion to make her look like... you," I say and he narrows his eyes.

That got his attention.

"What?" he says flatly.

"He had her look like Pansy too I guess, but he wanted you a lot," I say softly. "I thought you would want to know that."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" he asks as he looks me over and I shake my head. "Why are you telling me this?" He asks suspiciously like he thought I was lying.

"Because I don't like him," I admit and he studies my face for a few moments before stepping back and giving me a thoughtful look. "And I want him to be in trouble for hurting my friend so badly," I say and he gives me a surveying look before curling his lip back.

"That's disgusting," he says and I agree with him. "Fuck," he says as he runs his hand over his face. "Why would someone do that? I just had a fucking talk with him a couple weeks ago about not falling in line and this is what he does?"

I shrug. It's nice that he thinks it's as wrong as I do. At least he has some morals after all.

"Just thought you'd like to know. God knows what else he's been doing with your likeness," I say and he gives me a look before I walk off.

That night when I come in for dinner, I see Theodore Nott sitting at the end of the table by himself with a black eye and busted lip.

I smirk when he looks at me.

Serves him right.

I sit by Draco just out of habit and I realize the moment that I sit down that I'm still angry with him so I sigh and eat my food with out a word to the boy to the right of me. I look towards Blaise when he walks in. He gives Theo a look that makes him shrink and then he sits across from me, by Pansy. She takes one look at his hands before shaking her head and taking out her wand to heal his knuckles.

Muggle fighting... how appropriate for the pure blood elite.

We make eye contact and he raises his brows in greeting. He even smiles a little bit before looking back at his hand.

I grin.

I like having control over other peoples actions by the words I use, I've decided. I feel kind of like Draco, to be honest. I stop smiling when I feel Draco's hand on my thigh, gently squeezing.

"Are you done being mad at me?" he asks flatly and I take a drink from my glass as he stares at Blaise like his life depended on it.

"I haven't decided yet," I say as I pick up my fork.

He licks his teeth and glance at me, squeezing my thigh again.

"Come with me," Draco says in a low voice and I give him a look.

"I haven't even had anything to eat," I say as he stands up and takes my hand.

"You can eat later," he says flatly before pulling me up.

I make a face as he pulls me out of the room. I figure he's going to take me somewhere to apologize to me because he doesn't want to do it in front of his friends, and I have a smug look on my face, until he pulls me into a bathroom. I have no idea why, but I let my face fall when I realize it's the empty girls bathroom on the third floor that holds the hidden entrance to the chamber of secrets.

"What are you doing?" I ask as he shuts the door behind me and he locks it with his wand.

I'm nervous now and I give him a troubled look as I cross my arms and back up, my heels tapping against the tiled floor, echoing off the walls.

"No one comes in here," he says and I watch his back fearfully. He's facing the door and unbuttoning his jacket so I can't see his face. "And it's closer than my room," he adds as he hangs his jacket on the door knob.

"Close for what?" I ask nervously.

I shouldn't be so nervous around Draco, but being in his this place again sets me on edge.

Yes, that's it. That's why I'm scared right now.

He turns around and eyes me for a few moments as he unbuttons his cuffs and rolls up his sleeves. Why is he doing that? When he walks towards me with short and purposeful steps, I shrink away from him.

"What are you doing?" I whisper when he brings his hands up to unbutton my jacket.

I just let him, because I don't know what else to do.

"I think you know what I'm doing," he says coolly. When the jacket is loose, he jerks it from my body and lets it fall to the ground before untucking my shirt.

"Draco, I don't know if this is such a good idea," I say as he takes off my tie and slips off my sweater. "I'm still mad at you," I say weakly and the corner of his mouth tilts up in a smile.

"We can remedy that, I assure you," he says as his fingers start to slide up my shirt.

Then he kisses me.

After a few moments, I turn away and still his hands from reaching their goal. He narrows his eyes before turning me around and making me face one of the sinks. The forcefulness of his movements makes my breath stop for a moments and it... makes other parts of my body come alive. Is that wrong to get turned on by the way he's looking at me right now? I look at his reflection in the mirror as he bends me over.

"Draco, what are you doing?"

I put my hands on the sink edge for balance as he leans over my body to whisper in my ear. "Shut up," he says and I clench my jaw shut angrily before closing my eyes when he gently bites my earlobe.

That is my sweet spot and he knows it.

But...I'm still angry with him, aren't I? His fingers slip in between my legs and I roll my head to the side in submission... Fuck, I guess it doesn't actually matter right now.

I could say no... I could tell him to stop... I could... he blows against my ear and sucks again, making my whole body shiver...I'm officially turned on now... I could tell him to stop... I could... but I'm not going to.

Weak.

I don't care.

I focus on how good that feels as his clever fingers work their way under my skirt again and I shiver when he pulls down my tights and knickers. I don't know why this is happening right now... but I'm not going to stop it when it feels this good. I glance at him from the mirror as he stands back and loosens his tie, unbuttoning the first few buttons of his shirt. His cheeks are flushed and his eyes are intense as I grip the edge of the sink so tightly that my knuckles turn white. I realize how sexy he looks right now and I lick my lips as his hands go to the fastenings on his pants.

I start breathing a little heavier when he steps behind me and when I hear him unbuckle his belt, I close my eyes. His zipper goes down and it sounds like an echo and it becomes very uncomfortable for me when I imagine his fingers doing sinful things to me. Even the noise of his zipper sounds sexy to me and I bite my lower lip as I try not to do anything embarrassing.

"Unbutton your shirt," he commands with his hands slowly reaching into his slacks as he watches my reflection in the mirror.

I nod my head and swallow as I stands up straight and with shaky hands I push every button through each hole at an aggravatingly slow pace because I'm nervous and turned on... and still impossibly in love with him even though he's impossible to deal with half the time.

Once the shirt is unbuttoned, I find Draco's silver eyes in the mirror again. I look at him shyly. I have a tank top on underneath, and he raises his eyebrow.

"You are taking too fucking long," he says as he slides the shirt down my arms and he throws it behind him quickly.

It's laying on a public bathroom floor and I don't even mind.

"This is time sensitive," he says as he presses his chest into my back. He reaches around my body and down the front of my tank top, pushing the fabric and my bra to the side so he can grab me there. I start breathing heavy again as I arch my back a little bit and he holds me a little more tightly against him. "I want to be back before dinner is over," he says against my ear and then he kisses my neck. "I'm hungry," he adds.

How romantic.

He pushes me down again, and he uses his sinful hands to get me ready for him. I don't even protest when he nudges my legs a little further apart. He grips his hand in my hair before sliding into me with his other hand on my hip. I arch my back and close my eyes again when he pushes all the way in at an infuriatingly slow pace. He doesn't move for a second and I open my eyes to look at his reflection again before I rock back into him, wanting him to move.

I look like a complete whore in my current position but Draco looks amazing and I eye him for a few pleading moments before he catches my gaze. He smirks darkly before tightening his hand in my hair and starting to move.

Thank God.

I close my eyes again and let him have his way with my body because it always ends up feeling so good. It helps me forget about everything. After he sets sow and steady pace for a while, his movements start to become more jerky and he makes a few noises when he slams into me so hard that I jump forward from the impact, just missing smashing my head on the mirror because of the grip he has in my hair.

I open my eyes again and look over my shoulder. His cheeks are flushed and there's sweat forming on his brow. When he notices me looking at him, he removes his hand from my hair and he pulls down the straps of my tank top so they fall down my arms, giving him more room to grab and fondle certain places. I face forward again as he bends over and starts sucking on my neck and shoulder.

The noises our bodies are making seem incredibly loud in this large empty room and I bite my lower lip as he leaves open mouthed kisses along my skin.

"Don't bite me too hard," I say in breathless voice as he kisses my neck and rocks into my body with such a force that I can barely get the words out. "Not too hard," I say gently.

I know that's what's coming next.

When Draco gets into the rough sex mode, he always ends up biting me and it leaves such a violent looking mark. I actually like the way it feels sometimes... but bite marks are always the hardest for me heal and they make me feel like a slag when someone notices.

I put my hand over his as he rests it on my stomach to get him to go easy on me. "I love you," I whisper as I turn my head to kiss him over my shoulder. He starts slamming harder and I grip the sink with so much force that I fear it might break under my fingers.

He bites me anyways.

I make a rather embarrassing whimpering noise that echos off the walls because it hurt but felt good at the same time and it caused everything inside of me to shiver and explode.

I lean my forehead against the mirror and whisper his name as my knees start to buckle from my own climax. Draco holds me up when I slump against the sink and he stays inside of me for a few moments before carefully slipping out and pulling up my tights and knickers again. I stay bent over so I can catch my breath as Draco runs his hand up my back, then he slips the straps of my tank top and bra back up and leans down again to kiss the mark he left of my neck.

"That is the last time you'll be talking to Blaise alone, yes?" he says flatly and I give him a look of surprise from the mirror. "And Dean Thomas?"

Was that why this happened?

I shake my head but answer the way he wants anyways. I don't even like Zabini so there's no point in starting a fight and I can always talk to him about Dean later... When I'm not in a such a lust fog.

"Yes," I say softly and when I stand up to right my skirt, I can feel his arousal running down my legs.

Ew.

"Good," he says as he hands me my shirt. I button it quickly and tuck it in with my tie hanging over my shoulder as Draco buckles his pants and cracks his neck. I slide my jacket on as he unrolls his sleeves and tightens his tie.

I stop moving for a second and I just stare at him. He notices and after a few moments, he walks over to me with a sigh. "You forgive me for being so short with you today?" he says as he places a gentle kiss against my lips. "I forgive you for hurting my feelings, yes?" he says and I furrow my brows.

The way he said that... I didn't know I actually hurt his feelings by talking to Dean and Zabini... I guess in a way it would... Pansy did say he has trust issues and I'm sure I don't help when I'm talking to other guys like that.

"Yes," I say weakly because I don't know what else to say. I kind of feel a little shell shocked for some reason.

"Good," he smiles. "Let's go eat, then."

"Okay," I say stupidly and I even wash my hands just because I feel like I should.

Something catches my eye above one of the stalls. I glance up at that stupid moaning myrtle ghost

staring at me with a grin on her face as she hovers over one of the lavatory doors. I narrow my eyes at her with my cheeks heating in embarrassment as Draco takes me by the arm and leads me to the door. I'm carrying my sweater and Draco's carrying his jacket and we look completely guilty when we pass by the other students in the hallways.

I bring the collar of my shirt to my nose and sniff it, wondering if it smells like sex. I'm not sure, but I do smell like Draco's cologne now more than ever and I sigh at the thought before shaking it off. When we get back to the great hall, I try to tame my wild hair and hide the bite mark on my neck as everyone stares at us.

Draco doesn't seem to care, but it seems pretty obvious to me what we just did because his hair is a little out of place and both of us have flushed cheeks.

I catch Millicent's dark eyes as we walk towards our spot and she gives me a knowing look with her eyes twinkling.

How embarrassing.

I put my forehead in my hand and I pick up my fork so I can eat my dinner in peace, but when I look up I see Luna watching me from one of the other tables with her eyebrow slightly raised.

I feel Draco's hand on my thigh again and I glance at his profile as he eats his dinner.

He squeezes gently and his fingers dance to the inside of my leg, gently tickling me there.

Control.

Yes, I suppose Draco does have control over me in a way... only if I let him, though.

Right?

* * *

After much deliberation, I finally decided that I would, in fact, try out for the cheerleading squad. Not because I wanted to, mind you. I just needed to get away from the castle, especially since that Odette woman has been following me around all the time when I'm not in class or in the dorms. I haven't been able to stay the night with Draco as much either because she is constantly there, constantly watching me, and I suspect she reports back to Lord Voldemort every time I sneeze because she as a notepad that she writes on every time I see her.

She's cut off my ties with the other students as well. I went to talk to Dean the other day to make sure he was okay, but she cut me off and ushered me back to my side of the castle. I want to curse her every time I see her stupid face.

She doesn't come to the practices, though, so it's a nice break from her and her old wrinkly form.

A rather large showing of girls, and a few boys, tried out for the squad to my surprise. Ten girls were chosen, one of them being me, most of them being Daphne and her little group, and to my surprise, Luna made the team as well. I was grateful that she showed up for tryouts after I told her about them. She was upset about what happened to Theo, but I told her I had kept my promise and not told Draco, so she got over it quickly... or she pretended to, at least. I wanted to be friends with her again and now that Theo was so far out of the picture, I thought now would be a good time to rekindle our friendship.

I suspect Daphne had something to do with it too, because I kept telling her how much I wanted Luna to make the team if I did. It's good to have connections.

All the boys who tried out made the team as well, heavens knows why. All they do is shout into a megaphone and clap their hands. Colin Creevey and his little brother are all over that though, and it makes me smile each time I see them jump and cheer.

It suits them somehow, I guess.

I look at myself in the mirror at my stupid cheer leading uniform with a hateful glare on my face. It's hunter green with a short pleated skirt and a sleeveless top with black pipping that shows my midriff. I make a face at is as I turn to the side and I suck in my stomach as I glance down at the white trainers we have to wear as well.

Tonight is our first game against Beaxbaton and I haven't actually worn the uniform yet.

The uniform doesn't say anything at all, it just has the dark mark stitched across the chest in white and black and I glare at it and the traitorous way it makes me feel as Daphne comes up behind me.

"Aren't they the cutest?" she says and I glance at her. Of course, she looks good in the outfit and she has her hair in actual pig tails with the ends curled.

She looks like a slutty toddler.

"I think they're terrible," I mutter and she makes a face as she comes up behind me with a brush so she can put my hair in a pony tail.

She pushes me down on the stool and puts my head forward. She already did my make up with pink lip gloss and fake eyelashes. All the girls had to do their make up like this and I glance at Luna on the stool next to me as she attempts to put up her long blond hair into some type of up do. Daphne yanks my head forward with the brush and I whine as I make a face. She glares at me and tells me to hold still. I feel like a doll getting dressed up by a demented girl.

"They could be worse," she points out and I shake my head as she pulls all my hair to the top of my head. "When it gets colder we'll have black turtlenecks to wear underneath," she adds as she ties the hair tie around the pony tail and then she combs out my bangs as I play with one of the stupid green and black pom poms. "So we won't freeze or anything."

"Joy," I say sarcastically as I cross my arms. "I don't know if I want to do this," I admit in a small voice. It doesn't feel right...

I look around at the other girls. Ivy Parkinson, Romilda Vane, Astoria Greengrass, and a few other girls that I don't know very well are gathered around the mirrors, applying lip gloss and glitter and eyeshadow that shines against the light.

I sigh. This is nothing like the locker rooms when you're actually on the Quidditch team.

It smells like roses and lavender in here.

I almost miss the sweaty smell of the locker rooms, as gross as that is.

"But we get to leave the school grounds," she says as she takes out her wand to curl my hair. She is all over this and, to the surprise of no one, was made head cheerleader. "And you'll be able to talk to people outside of Hogwarts," she says and I glance at her from the mirror. "You won't be so secluded here at the castle. That's a start, right?" she says and I nod my head.

After curling my pony tail she ties a green ribbon in my hair and steps back. "See, just perfect," she says and I look back at the mirror once again.

Traitor.

"We're all done," she says and then she pulls a camera out of her bag. "Come here, Ginny," she says and I reluctantly walk towards her. She puts her hand on my shoulder and holds the camera at arms length away from us as she tilts her head towards mine. "Smile."

She clicks the button and the camera flashes.

I blink a few times to get the spots out of my eyes as she turns it around to see how the picture turned out.

"Oh, Ginny," she scolds as she makes a face at me. "You didn't smile. We're taking another one," she says as she puts her arm back around my shoulder and holds the camera back up. "Smile this time," she says around a fake grin.

"I don't feel like smiling," I admit with my arms crossed and she glares at me from the corner of her eyes.

"This is for my scrapbook for graduation," she says. "I want good memories for my grandchildren to look at," she adds and I roll my eyes. "Smile goddamnit."

I sigh and then look at the camera, giving it one of my best fake Folk Hills smiles. The camera flashes and when she checks the picture, she smiles. "See, that wasn't so hard, now was it?"

She scurries off to take pictures with the other girls and I roll my eyes.

I shake my head and go to pick up my bag. I open it up to make sure I have everything. Pom poms, my wand, a sweat shirt and sweat pants, and extra lip gloss. Check. I zip it up and put it over my shoulder as I walk with the other girls out of the changing room. Luna walks by me with her hair in a bun and she gives me an uncomfortable smile as she tries to tie the green bow in her hair.

I take it from her and have her bend down so I can do it for her.

"Thanks," she says once she stands up straight. "These uniforms are awfully short," she says as she pulls on on the skirt. "I didn't realize we would be showing so much skin," she admits with a blush as my pony tail bounces annoyingly as we walk down the hall.

"I know," I say with a sigh. "But oh well," I say with a shrug. "At least we get to leave the castle."

I'm trying to be optimistic.

There's no Odette following me this time so I have to look on the bright side, right?

"Yeah," she says softly. "There is that. So, have you heard anything about Harry?" She asks in a whisper as she looks around to make sure no one is listening.

I've caught her up to speed on everything that's been happening with me. Voldemort, my blood, my marriage with Draco... Everything.

I shrug. "I figure you know who wasn't able to do anything. If Harry was hurt or captured it would be all over the papers. I would never forgive myself if it was my fault he was caught."

She squeezes my hand and gives me a sad look before we both face forward.

"Hey, Ginny, Lovegood," Daphne turns around with that damn camera again and lifts it. "Smile."

I go into autopilot and tilt my head towards Luna with a fake smile on my face. The camera goes off and I blink a few times before Daphne turns around and continues to walk.

"It feels weird to smile," Luna comments softly and I give her a troubled look before facing forward again.

When we get outside, the team is already by the carriages and when I see them in their cool black uniforms, I feel envy in my heart. It's not fair. Draco spots me when I walk towards the one of the carriages and he smiles as he approaches, raking his eyes down my body like he wanted to eat me.

"I _like_ your uniform," he says with a sinful smirk as I cross my arms. When he gets close enough, he tugs on one of my curls. "Yes, I like this very much," he adds and I narrow my eyes at him.

"Shut up," I say with an eye roll. I look over his uniform. Of course, it is much cooler than my own. The entire thing is black, with black riding pants and boots, and a black jersey top. The only color is the hunter green lining of the cape and the stitching of the dark mark on his chest. They actually look pretty cool... If the stupid dark mark wasn't there.

.

"It pleases me knowing you'll be cheering for me all night," he says as he takes my bag and throws it in the back with the others. "You do want me to do well, don't you?"

"Of course," I say with an eye roll and then I look down at my chest. "I just hate wearing this symbol. It stands for everything I despise."

"Now," he says as he uses his finger tips to tilt my chin up. "None of that. You're supposed to be a perky cheerleader, remember?"

I narrow my eyes. "Hoorah," I say flatly and he laughs as he runs his hand up my bare arm. He leans against the carriage as he looks down at me with a warm look in his eyes.

When he looks at me like this I know he loves me and it makes my heart skip a beat. I can forgive him anything when he look sat me like that... I do forgive him everything if I was being completely honest with myself. I put my hand on his chest and run my fingers up to the clasp on his cloak. It seems a little twisted, so I undo it for him and try to fix it as he stares down at me with soft eyes.

"Thank you," he says gently as he puts his hand on my waist and he pulls me close. I haven't really been talking to anyone but him and my girlfriends, so things have steadied out again and gone back to normal. I'm grateful for it. Once I'm finished fixing the clasp I sigh and stare at his chest as I rest my hands against his shoulders.

"I wish I could play," I whine again. I am constantly whining about it. I don't care if everyone else finds me annoying.

"I know you do," he says as he runs his fingers along the skin exposed along my midriff.

He studies me for a few seconds, before smiling softly and bending down to kiss me. I meet him half way with my hands on his neck as I lift myself up on my toes to reach him. I'm so used to wearing the heels for class now that the flat trainers throw me off when I'm kissing my boyfriend.

"Hey, guys," I sigh against Draco's lips when I hear Daphne's voice and when we both turn towards her, she lifts her camera. "Smile," she says with a grin and I look up to Draco to see if he's going to actually smile.

He glances down at me and smirks.

That's when the camera goes off and she scurries off before I can ask her to retake it. I don't have a picture of Draco and I. I realize now that I actually might want one.

The Quidditch coach, a big burly man in his late forties steps out and blows a whistle. "Alright, team, get on the carriages," he looks at his watch. "We should be at Beaxbatons by the hour."

Draco winks at me and kisses my cheek one last time before walking to the rest of his Quidditch team. I feel Luna touch my arm, shaking me out of my daze.

"Let's get on," she says, nodding to the carriage I'm standing by.

I nod my head and climb onto the carriage, hyper aware of how short the skirt is and how easily it would be for someone to look up when I'm climbing stairs. Just great.

I thought that Beauxbatons was an all girl school, but I suppose I was wrong because there are boys walking about the place in powder blue uniforms along with the girls. Their Quidditch pitch is just outside of the gates of the large sparkling palace that is their school and their locker rooms are pure white with bright lights that hurt my eyes.

"Everything so clean in here," Ivy comments as she sets her bag down on one of the benches.

Someone agrees with her as I put my bag in my locker and I follow the others to the stadium. It's all blue and silver like Ravenclaw house and I grip my stupid pom poms as we climb the stairs to the platform so we can be stationed in front of our stands to cheer for our stupid team.

Hmf.

I don't even know what we are exactly. They're the Beauxbaton Hares and they even have a boy dressed up as a blue rabbit running around their side of the stands, getting everyone riled up. I guess we're the Hogwarts- run by a dictator who is way too obsessed with snakes- team. We don't have a mascot for that. It would probably scare the children. I laugh at my own thought, but snap out of it when Daphne pushes me into position.

"Pay attention," she says. "Our team is going to come out soon.

"Oh," I say because I don't care and I put my hands behind my back as I watch the Beauxbaton team fly out of their entrance to the roar of the crowd. They have cheerleaders too, I see and I crane my neck to see them jumping around and doing kicks and all that other crap Daphne taught me.

Hmf again.

"Ginny," Daphne hisses at me and I jump when I realize we're doing some kind of cheer and I start following the steps of the others. I forgot the words, because I'm a horrible cheerleader, and I try not to mess up too many times as we clap our hands and cheer and chant and all that other boring stuff.

Our team comes out and I sigh in envy as they fly out into the night sky.

It's not fair.

I glare at them all, until I catch Draco's head of blonde hair. He's hovering close to where we're stationed, and when he sees me, he smiles and winks again before lowering his goggles. I find myself clapping and cheering a little louder after that.

The game went on for hours and I found myself yelling at Millicent more than once because she kept messing up. I should be out there! She shouldn't have made the team and when I screamed that at her as she passed, she grabbed a bat from one of our beaters and tried to hit one of the blundgers at me. I dodged it at the last second, but I fell on my bottom and Luna had to help me up. I glared at her until I saw Draco fly past her and knock her off her broom with a sly elbow to her ribs.

I laughed as she fell and didn't feel the least bit bad when a ref had to blow the whistle to save her from death.

She deserved it, that stupid harpy.

The seeker for the other team was a thin brunette who was quite good on her broom and she was giving Draco a run for his money. They kept on running into each other in their attempts to get the snitch and once she even out flew him towards the stands, but got hit by a passing quaffle that left her stunned for a moment or two. Then I could hear them speaking to one another when ever they passed our station and I tried to catch their conversations, but it was in french so I couldn't understand it even if I could hear all of it over the roar of the crowd.

"Who is that girl?" I asked Daphne when we stopped cheering to get a drink of water.

"What girl?" she asks and I nod towards the French stands.

"The other seeker that keeps running into Draco."

"Oh," she says and then she gives me an uncomfortable smile. "That's Sophie," she says and I raise my brows.

"Do you know Sophie?" I ask as we start walking back towards the stands.

She nods her head. "Yeah, that is Draco's ex," she says and my heart makes an odd thump. "That French girl I told you about," she says before plastering a fake smile on her face and running back out to cheer.

His Ex? Why does that make me feel so uncomfortable.

Cho flies past me on my way out and I glare at her too. Why does Draco have so many freaking ex's? And why are they all better looking than me!

Ugh, I have decided that I hate cheerleading.

_Go team_... yeah right.

I spend the rest of the night glaring and doing my stupid cheers with only half a heart. I'm relieved when Draco finally beats out that french girl and catches the snitch and I cheer and shake my pom poms along with the rest of the cheerleaders as he carefully sets his broom to the ground with his team trailing behind.

I watch as the two teams shake hands and I smile when Draco looks up to me.

He looks so good right now.

I love him.

I sigh as I put my chin in my hand and I lean against the rail on the platform until Daphne pulls me again. "It's like dealing with a child with special needs with you," she says as she takes my arm so she can drag me to the changing rooms again. "Pay attention, Gin."

In a another ploy for school unity among Europe we were all ushered into their great hall to eat dinner. I frowned as we were placed at a marble topped table along one side of the room, while the other team and their cheerleaders were along the other. So much for unity.

"Sit by me, sweetheart," Draco says against my ear and I shiver because I didn't realize he was so close to me.

I nod my head and take his hand as I walk with him towards the rest of the team. I sit down carefully on the bench, trying my best to keep my skirt down. "You cheered well," Pansy says from across the table, and I think she's making fun of me, so I ignore her while I pick up a piece of bread.

"You flew really well," I say to Draco as I kiss his cheek. He smiles at me as Luna takes a seat on the on the other side of me.

Draco eyes her suspiciously for a few moments and I give him a look so he shakes out of it and smiles at me.

"And you look great in that outfit," he says with darkened eyes as he takes me in. "It doesn't even matter if you know all the moves or not," he says and I laugh because he obviously was watching me mess up every cheer we had. "I could watch you all day."

I blush and let him kiss me and when I turn back to my food I see Zabini watching me oddly. When I glance at him, he quickly looks away and I frown. Weird.

"I'll be right back," Draco says as he takes off his riding cloak and he hands it to me.

"Uh, okay," I say in confusion as I watch him walk over to the french team's table. He stands at the head and leans over to talk to that Sophie girl and I narrow my eyes as she laughs at the funny french thing he said.

Then he stands straight and starts talking to the rest of the table with a hand behind his back and the other moving as he speaks.

"What's he doing?" I ask to no one particular, but Pansy answers.

"He's networking," she says and I glance at her as she takes a drink from the silver goblet. "You should get used to it," she says.

He looks back at our table, but he's not looking for me and when he finds Blaise, he nods his head. Zabini wipes his mouth off with his napkin and stands up, walking to stand beside Draco. He puts on his best charming smile when he gets there and he leans down to talk to a pretty girl. He tucks some hair behind her ear and says something that I bet is naughty judging by the way the girl is blushing.

I look at Pansy again and she's clutching her silverware so tightly that her knuckles are turning white. "Just networking," I say and she looks at me. "Gotten used to it?" I ask and she glares before turning back to her food.

I wonder if Sophie is one of the two girls that Draco has slept with. I don't know why I'm even thinking about it, but I feel something heavy on my chest... jealousy. I try to shake it off as I watch him talk to her with his handsome smile and I slump my shoulders a bit as she smiles back. Why does she have to play Quidditch so well? I wonder if he's impressed with her flying. I can't impress anyone with mine because of the stupid Dark Lord and his stupid demand that I not play my favorite sport!

I take a deep breath and look down at the roll I was tearing apart with my fingers.

The roll did nothing to deserve my wrath so I brush it off in my napkin and grab a new one.

I hope Draco kills him soon so I can have a normal life again.

I feel someone looking at me and when I look back towards the French table I see Draco staring right at me. When we make eye contact, he raises his eyebrows and taps his temple.

Oh, right.

I can't think of such things so unguarded.

I nod my head and turn back to my food as I try to think of something a little less deadly.

I don't know what this porridge... stew... soup... thing is that they served us, but it's disgusting and I make a face at it as I sniff it. No, I'm not eating that. I push it away and go back to eating the bread. Carbohydrates are great for a cheerleader, right?

I eat three rolls by the time Draco comes back to the table with a smug smirk on his face. "How did it go?" I ask with jealousy making my voice bitter.

"It went quite well," he says as he takes one of the rolls out of my hand and he takes a bite from it. I glare at him.

He smiles.

"Is my lover jealous?" he asks against my ear and I shake my head.

"Of course not, I always like watching you flirt with a pretty girl. What's not to like?"

"I was hardly flirting, but I bet you don't like it when the tables are turned," he says as he picks up his spoon to eat the gray muck in the bowl. "At least I wasn't cuddling her and kissing her cheek, right?" he says and I furrow my brows as I think about Dean.

"Why even bring that up?" I say with a sigh and he shrugs.

"Because it pisses me off," he adds flatly and I shake my head. Didn't he prove his point by being a dominant sex beast? Why does he always have to bring stuff like that up? "Anyways, I have to be charming to get what I want."

"What do you want from them?" I ask seriously as he takes a sip from the soup porridge sewage looking thing.

"Connections," he says and then he nods to their table. "I had them when I was dating Sophie, but once we broke up the connection with their pureblooded class was severed because of how it ended. I needed to make amends."

"What do the pureblooded french people possibly have that you want?"

"Ginny," he says with a sigh as he tugs on my ponytail. "I have very big plans," he says and I frown. "You will know them soon enough so don't pout. Your outfit is too appealing for you to sulk," he adds with a glance down to my chest. I push him away before shaking my head and taking another roll from the bowl in the center. "I will have fun with you when we get back to the castle so don't eat too many of those."

I laugh as I take a bite and he kisses my cheek.

I hope _Sophie_ sees it.

"Ginny," Luna whispers as she tugs on my arm. I look at her with my eyebrow raised. "That Odette woman is here," she says as she nods to the end of the hall.

I make a face when I see Odette there, watching me with her damn notebook in her hand, and her damn purple robes... I scowl.

"Oh, fuck it all," I say as I throw down my roll and everyone laughs.

I spend the rest of the dinner glaring at Odette and thinking of ways to push her off a cliff and make it look like an accident. I have a pretty clever idea that involves the girls tower at Hogwarts a strong gust of wind... but Draco snaps me out of my thoughts when he puts his napkin on the table.

"I'll be right back," he says and I nod as I go back to glaring at Odette.

Draco leaves the hall and I was figuring he was going to the loo or something boring like that until I spotted that Sophie girl get up and leave as well.

I narrow my eyes, but I try to calm myself down. I will not act like Draco. I am more secure in our relationship than that. I pick up my spoon and put it my mouth just so I have something to do with myself. As time passes, I glance at the clock. They've been gone ten minutes but it feels like five hours. I shake my head. I will not go and try to find Draco... I will not be that jealous possessive girlfriend everyone dreads.

I will not be like Draco.

I keep on telling myself that until I start feeling my body burn.

_It burns,_ Pansy had said when I asked her about the bonding spell long before I even knew what it was. _Love always burns,_ she had said. I look around me once as the burning becomes unbearable, heating my skin like it was setting on fire... slowly cooking me until there's nothing left. I'm not touching anyone, I'm not even sitting by another guy, and when I look back to the doors where Draco and Sophie both left, I narrow my eyes dangerously.

This isn't my fault this time.

That bastard is _cheating_ on me.

I stand up and throw my spoon down on the table so it clatters against the marble. I can feel a sneer on my face as I stomp towards the door, ignoring everyone when they try to call me back.

I can't bloody believe him.


	13. Chapter 13

_A/N: Don't worry... I am not dead! _

* * *

I am going to kill him.

I am going to kill him, bring him back, and then kill him again. I'm gripping my wand so tightly that it might snap in half. I am going to kill him.

I am going to _kill_ him.

I'm seeing red as I walk down the bright halls of the Beauxbaton palace. It's all sparkling and white and the curtains are a beautiful robin's egg blue color that shines in the sun... I hate it. I hate everything right now and I especially hate Draco. I sneer as I think of him and his handsome pointy face that I love so much. My hands start shaking and my cheeks feel like they're on fire. I am going to lift my wand and tear him to shreds, that cheating bastard!

I stop in my tracks when I hear a feminine giggle and I tilt my head to the left.

I hear it again and I feel my blood boiling.

It's a french giggle, if there ever was such a thing.

I narrow my eyes as I imagine all the terrible things Draco is doing right now to that french hussy. I can see them tangled around each other with Draco's cheeks flushed and that sinful smirk on his face. I can see him biting her shoulder like he always bites mine as he drills into her. I can see him telling her he loves her. I inhale a sharp breath and I bite my lower lip so hard that I break skin.

I am going to kill him!

I hear another giggle and my eyes narrow dangerously.

I can't stand it anymore. My skin is on fire. I feel like I'm going to explode and a terrible, terrible headache has started to weed it's way through my brain, making me see spots. I locate the door where the giggles are coming from and I open it with a jerk of my hand.

It bangs against the wall and the girl screams as she hops away from the boy.

The girl is Sophie and the boy is... not Draco.

Oh.

I feel my anger deflate as relief washes over me... but the relief is short lived because I'm so hot now that I'm actually sweating.

They both stare at me with shocked expressions and then the boy's eyes flick down to my lip. I bring a self conscious hand up to cover it and when I pull back, I see blood.

I must look a mess.

That Sophie girl says something to me... something bitchy in french judging by her facial expression, but I have no idea what the fuck she's saying so I shake my head.

"I'm looking for my boyfriend," I tell her as I send a look to the boy sitting on the desk. He looks a little too mousy to be with that lovely Sophie girl, to be honest. I would never say that out loud, of course. As long as she isn't with my Draco, I'm fine.

God, I am so hot.

I lean against the door frame and squint my eyes because the light is hurting my head... everything is hurting my head and I pull on the collar of my uniform to try to cool myself down.

"I'm looking for Draco. Do you know where Draco is?" I ask and she crosses her arms. "Draco Malfoy?"

"I know who he is," she says in a french accent.

I try to ignore the irritation in her voice.

I would be a little tiffed too if someone destroyed my snog session, but my head hurts too much and I'm way too hot to feel bad about it.

She was Draco's past girlfriend, after all. It's in a rule book some where that I'm not supposed to like her.

"Do you know where he is?" I ask and she shakes her head.

"I do not," she says with her hands on her hips and I nod my head. I spare a glance at the mousy bloke who's watching me like I just spoiled his favorite sport.

I look at Sophie again. I suppose I did.

"Okay, then," I say gently. "Sorry," I add for good measure as I close the door to let her get to it.

If Draco wasn't doing anything with her... then where is he and why do I feel so terrible?

I wipe my forehead off with the back of my hand and I cringe at all the sweat. Why am I sweating? I am so fucking hot and my head feels like it's going to explode. Draco never came to me sweating and looking like a beast every time the tables were turned. Why is this happening to me? I lean against the wall and try to catch my breath as I clench my eyes shut... trying to get rid of this damn headache.

"Ginny?"

I snap my eyes open.

Draco, just the person I wanted to see.

"You fucking bastard," I hiss at him. I find my energy and I push off the wall. "What have you been doing?" I snap at him and he looks puzzled.

"What?" he says and my temper boils over to an unhealthy level.

Draco is so good at spinning things around on me, changing the subject, and making something seem different than how it originally was.

I will not let him do that to me now.

"What have you been doing?"

The windows start to shake and he looks around with a quick snap of his neck before focusing on me again.

I don't even care.

"What are you talking about?" he ask as he steps closer to me, looking over my face with a critical eye. "Jesus, your face is all red. What's going on with you?" I push him with my hands on his strong chest and he stumbles back a few paces. "Don't fucking push me," he hisses and my brain pulses painfully at his glare.

A window explodes at the very end of the hall and Draco looks concerned.

"You cheated on me, that's what," I say as I inhale sharply. The little dots are swimming in front of my eyes again and I feel like my body is going to bust any moment now.

I had a feeling like this once when I was small and running around in the summer heat all day with out bothering to drink water. The healer said it was heat stroke... Why is it happening to me now?

"Calm down," he whispers while taking a step closer to me.

"Don't tell me to calm down, you cheating bastard!"

The windows keep on rattling down the hall, like a strong gust of wind was outside, making them shake like cowards.

"Ginny," he snaps. He grips my arm and pushes me against one of the vibrating walls. "Do you even see what you're doing?" he hisses as he glances at the shaking windows. "You're going to alert the whole damn castle."

"I don't care!" I yell at him and I smack his hand away when he goes to run his thumb over my hurt lip.

"Why are you bleeding?" he asks sharply. He shakes his head and brings his wrist up to my forehead, like he was checking my temperature. "You are burning up," he says as he lets his hand fall. "You need to go to a healer. You have an insane fever."

"Not until you tell me what you've been doing, you cheater!"

"I wasn't cheating!" he shouts at me and I flinch from the intensity in his voice. "It wouldn't make you burn like this," he says seriously, trying to control his temper as he runs a hand over my arm. "Only the person in trouble burns..." he trails off and shakes his head as he looks me over. "No, this is something different."

I don't know if I should believe him. I don't know what to do with myself right now.

"I wouldn't cheat on you," he says as he brings his hand up to rest on my neck. I inhale a long breath and look down because I feel like I honestly might faint or something terrible like that. "I am painfully monogamous in my relationships, Ginny," he says like I was stupid. "It would be quite unfair of me to be cheating considering how hard I am on you," he says and that does make sense, in a way, I guess. "I am too fucking busy to cheat anyways. I wouldn't even be able to find the time."

He didn't have to say that last bit, to be honest.

"Then why did you take so long?" I ask in a breathless voice. My stomach turns oddly and I put my hand along my midsection to deaden the odd pain there. "You weren't going to the loo for twenty minutes," I hiss as I glare up at him.

Don't let him spin this. Don't let him win.

"My father was at the game. He wanted to speak to me," he says with a frown as he looks me over like I had sprouted another head. I bend over slightly because my stomach, and my head, and my whole entire body feels like it's going to fall apart. "Jesus Christ, Gin. What is going on with you?" he asks gently as he runs his hand down my arm. I push him away and put my hands on my knees.

I might throw up.

I barely notice the windows still shaking. It's like background music now. Faint and not intrusive, but I cringe when I hear shoes tapping against the marble floor. It's echoing against my eardrums, making my spine tingle.

"You look terrible," Draco whispers as he kneels in front of me so he can see my face. "What is happening to you?"

I give him a look. "Don't say that to me," I hiss at him.

He just bruised my vanity by saying that. I am well aware that I look terrible considering how I feel. I don't need anyone pointing it out, thank you. I blink a few times and then I wince when my brain feels like it pulses.

"I can feel the blood run through my brain." I say. I know it doesn't make much sense, but Draco looks even more concerned than before. "Something isn't right," I whisper and he nods his head.

"Let me take you to their healer," he says gently as he stands straight to take my elbow.

"Just wait," I say as I inhale deeply through my nostrils. I hold my hand to his chest to stop him from trying to help me. "I don't want to move just yet."

"What is going on here?" I hear Odette's annoyingly old voice grate against my ear drums and I clench my eyes shut. It hurts to listen to her. "What are you doing, Mr. Malfoy?" she asks. When she gets close enough, she takes one look at me before looking repulsed. _Thanks again_. "Let me have a look," she says and Draco steps between us.

"No," he says flatly as he pushes my sweating mess of a form behind him. I fold my arms over my stomach and rest against the wall. "I will take her to the infirmary here."

Odette narrows her beady eyes dangerously and she lifts her clip board like it was a shield. "I am more than capable to handle this situation," she says flatly. "My healing license is as good as the next and I was given very specific orders to look over Miss Weasley's well being until she is old enough to be bred."

Bred.

She literally just said bred.

I am not some animal.

I narrow my eyes and suddenly the windows start shaking with even more force and ferocity. I barely even notice, but Draco looks at me with dark, unreadable eyes.

Our eyes meet and I glare.

I hate that Odette woman.

I hate that she is always following me and I never get one damn moment to myself between her and Draco and Draco's friends.

I hate them all.

"I must report this and her healing report after I check her over," Odette says as she glances around at the shaking windows with her eyes slightly narrowed as she writes a note on her clip board. "If she is ill, the Dark Lord will want to know why."

She goes to step around Draco but he doesn't move, so she ends up just reaching for me. When her paper like skin touches my arm, I yank it back violently.

"Don't touch me, you old hag," I hiss and she narrows her eyes into two little slits.

"How dare you," she says as she tries to touch me again. "I have orders from the Great Dark Lord to watch over you and I'll be damned if you ruin this for me."

"Do not touch me!" I yell as I stand to my full height. I'm taller than her. For once that made me feel like I had a little more power.

"You stupid little girl-"

Odette said more vile things to me, but I couldn't hear them because I was too angry and the windows were too loud.

When she went to touch me again, I pulled back and punched her in the jaw. Her face flew to the side like a rag doll and I just stared at her with hateful eyes, trying to still the pulsing in my brain.

My hand starts to hurt as I shake it out. I've never hit someone like that before. She snaps her old face back to mine with her expression screwed up in insane looking anger.

She wants to hurt me. I can tell.

She goes for her wand, but Draco pushes me back again.

He's saying harsh words to the wounded Odette, but I can't hear it... Well, I can... I just can't make out his words because now there's an odd ringing in my head that makes everything fuzzy. I lean to the side, with my back against the wall, and I hold my head in my hands.

"...You will be punished for you insolence in this matter, Malfoy..." I hear Odette hiss at Draco. I glance at his strong back through my fingers and I see his spine stiffen. "And I am telling the Dark Lord about all of this," she says and I see her hands motioning to the shaking windows. I glare at them. "Her magic is unstable and you were wrong when you said you could turn her..."

A pulse runs through my brain and I cringe as I hunch over more.

"...She will be taken and have her mind cleaned like the others..." Her voice again. It's like nails on a chalk board. "...Our Lord didn't want it to come to this, but I see no other option. She will not be changed..."

"Shut up," I say and my mouth feels weird and dry.

I lick my lips. It hurts.

"...This little experiment of yours has failed and I believe the Dark Lord has known for quite some time how attached you've become..."

"Shut up," I say a little louder as her voice tears at the headache in my brain.

"...She will be easier to manage under re-education. It was foolish to think a blood traitor would-"

"SHUT UP!" I scream.

It finally gets their attention and they both look at me in surprise as their conversation dies flat. Odette looks shocked for half a moment before glaring and Draco... Draco's eyes look unreadable.

Like always.

"Why am I even standing here talking to you children," she says with an eye roll as she goes to lift her wand again. "This is just foolish."

"I told you to shut up," I say darkly. I kind of want to hit her again and from the corner of my eye, I see Draco reaching into his pocket to get his wand.

"Yes, I heard that, dear," she tells me in a condescending voice. "In fact, I think all of France did." She flicks her wrist and means to hit Draco with a curse. I suppose it's to get him out of the way, but she didn't notice his wand and he easily deflected it. Her eyes inflame with anger and she looks like she's ready to kill when her curse goes bouncing off the opposite wall. Draco stands before her all tall and handsome with one hand casually in his pocket and the other leveling his wand at her chest. "Are you kidding me? You are already in so much trouble-"

She was going to start ranting again and I just couldn't take it. Her voice is too damn annoying and I cover my ears with my hands.

"Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up," I keep repeating with a stomp of my foot and my eyes clenched tight. "Shut up. Shut up. Shut up..."

"What is wrong with you!" she yells at me.

The way she said it, with so much disdain, made me want to throttle her.

"SHUT UP!" I scream again like some mad woman.

Then all the windows start to shatter, one by one, like someone was throwing a bomb through each window to see the inside explode.

Draco grabs me and forces me down to my knees. I cover my head as the glass flies around us and I hear Draco cuss and hiss as he drops to his knees beside me, covering me from most of the destruction. It sounds like a fireworks show and I jump with each explosion, but Draco barely moves. After a couple seconds, he cusses again and falls on me a bit more. I barely feel it as the glass breaks and busts and slashes everything around us. Then is all falls silent and I carefully uncover my head to look around.

There are glass shards everywhere... not one window was left untouched, and I blink a few times as I take in one of the tapestries on the far wall. I think it used to have some kind of unicorn scene woven into it, but it was in tatters now. It made me feel bad. The cold fall wind is blowing in freely from outside and it chills me and my fever. I stay on my knees and cross my arms as I look up at Draco. He's still kneeling beside me and he's staring down at me with a look on his face I can't exactly place.

Wonder and... and fear?

That can't be right.

I shake my head. Of course, that can't be right.

"Draco?" Is all I manage to say through the lump in my throat. He has a cut across his left cheek and I frown at is as the blood drips down his pale skin.

Did I do this?

I look around the hallway at all the broken windows while Draco stands up and towers over me. He offers me his hand and I look into his face. That look is gone. That odd look that I have never seen him have before has vanished, replaced by his usual look of cold, emotionless disdain.

It's a look that somehow fits him.

I take his hand and allow him to pull me to my feet. I wince when I see the cut even closer... a piece of glass must have got him and I feel guilty for it. We're lucky it didn't hit anything else, like his neck or his eyes... or anything else that could be fatal.

I don't feel any better, though.

My stomach still hurts.

"I'm sorry," I whisper as I eye his face. He stares at me for an uncomfortable amount of time before he raises a brow like I was a puzzle he was trying to figure out.

Then we hear a groan.

We both look towards Odette. She had been thrown on her back during the blast and she groans in pain again as she tries to roll to her side.

Draco takes out his wand again and goes towards the old woman. He kneels beside her and points his wand at her chest as he glares down at her. I watch as he swishes his wand a few times, erasing her memory the way he had erased my mother's and the man he had nearly killed in the forest that one summer day.

"You lost control of your magic and shattered all the windows in this hallway," he tells the old woman as she lays still on her back, blinking up at him like a frightened child. "You will suggest a leave of absence. You're too old and the job is too hard," he says and she nods her head. He pockets his wand and takes her clipboard, tearing off the top sheet and balling it up. "Now, lay here for another five minutes and then go find one of the Beauxbaton faculty. You will tell them what you have done. Do you understand?"

"Yes," she says and I furrow my brows as he puts the paper in his pocket.

How did Draco get so good at this? Messing with the mind is always tricky business.

"You never saw me and you never saw Ginny. You came into this hallway to find the washroom and got confused and disorientated. Understood?"

"Yes," she says again in the same monotone voice.

"Good," he says tiredly.

He lifts his wand one more time before standing and facing me again. I cross my arms. I still burn terribly.

"Did I do this?" I whisper, already knowing the answer.

He nods his head and then holds out his hand again. I eye it for a few moments and then I lick my lips nervously, placing my hand in his. He begins pulling me down the opposite hallway, away from Odette and all the broken glass.

"Why did you do that to her?" I ask seriously.

"I can't have her seeing the spells I have on you," he says and I swallow hard. "She would tell the dark lord and it's too early in the game for that."

"Oh..." I whisper even though I have way too many questions to ask him right now. I just feel like I might faint.

He doesn't say anything to me as we walk and he doesn't even look at me.

"Wait," I whine as a sharp pain in my stomach makes me stop. I tug on his hand as I bend over.

"What in the hell is going on with you?" he snaps hatefully and I clench my eyes shut again as my stomach turns.

"I don't feel well," I tell him and then I cover my mouth as the bile moves up my throat.

"What?" he says, because my words were muffled by my hand. He places his hand on my shoulder and my stomach heaves.

Then I throw up around my hand. It burns the back of my throat and I can taste how disgusting it is. I heave again and more vomit comes up, seeping threw my fingers. The thought of how it must look makes me throw up even more and I see spots in front of my eyes again. I can't stop it, so I put my hand down and empty my stomach all over the floor and all over Draco's riding pants.

I would be appalled if I didn't feel like I was dying. My eyes are watering and my stomach is contracting in a million odd ways that hurt and make me wish I was at home in bed with my parents watching over me. My throat feels like it's on fire as I heave and spit and make horrific noises.

Draco says something to me, but I can't hear it. He moves quickly to get out of the way as I fall to my knees and put my hands on the floor, emptying every single thing I had in my stomach. After a lifetime of getting sick, my body gives me a break and I breathe heavily for a few moments, trying to catch my breath as the air reeks of my sickness. I gag again and then open open my eyes so I'm staring right at my pool of vomit.

It's red.

Red like blood.

That can't be good.

It takes me a few moments to realize that someone's rubbing my back, but when I feel Draco's warm hand sliding up and down my spine, I try to relax my taunt frame. I settle back on my knees and wipe off the back of my mouth with my hand, feeling completely disgusting. Everything on my body hurts now. The muscles in my stomach, my throat, my mouth, my head... everything is in pain and I'm crying. Crying horribly with loud sobs and shaking breaths. I must look pathetic and when I feel my stomach lurch again, I shake my head. I can't possibly throw up again. I can't have anything left. That can't be happening...

I feel my mouth water.

I can't possibly...

I lean forward and puke again. This time I feel Draco holding onto my pony tail so it won't get into the vomit and I keep going until there is literally nothing left in me to wretch. I end up just dry heaving, wishing for death.

Draco waits a few moments, and then he swishes his wand. The puddle of vomit disappears, but the smell doesn't. "Let's just make it home," he whispers as he pulls me up.

I lean against him for support, trying not to shake.

We don't go to the Beauxbaton hospital wing and we don't go back to their Feast Hall. We head straight for the carriages and Draco lays me down on one of the seats before he disappears. I don't even care where he went. My world is spinning and when I close my eyes I feel like I'm on a boat in the middle of a violent sea.

"I told the coach we're going home," he tells me as he climbs into the carriage with our things over his shoulder. He throws them on the opposite seat and sits beside me. "I told him you were having women problems," he says in disgust and I make a face as well as he drapes his riding cloak over my body. I curl into a ball and hug my knees. "Guys never seem to question that," he says matter of factly.

I guess that's true.

I keep my eyes shut tight the whole ride home, trying not to throw up again. When we get back to the castle, Draco takes me by the arm.

"Why aren't we going to the infirmary?" I ask in a weary voice as we pass that hallway.

"Because," is all he says as we take the halls and staircases that lead to his dorm. I'm too tired to walk by the time we reach his room, and when he opens the door, I nearly lurch towards his bed. "Do you think you'll throw up again?" he asks flatly as I lay on the bed with my body curled into the fetal position.

I shake my head even though I don't know if that's true.

"Here," he says as he nudges my arm so I'll look at him. He holds up a glass of water and sets it on the night stand. "This is for you, and this," he holds up the trash bin and sets it by the bed. "Is if you throw up again."

I nod my head and turn back into the pillow.

"I'll be right back," he says and then he starts walking towards the door. I pull his cloak over me like a blanket because I don't want to move to get the actual covers.

It's that bad.

He pauses a moment and I hear him hesitate at the door before he walks back to me. He hovers over my body for a few moments, just staring at me as the weight from his hands makes the mattress sink down.

I ignore his stare.

He places a kiss against my temple and runs his nose along my cheek. "I love you," is all he says and I don't have the strength to say it back so I just nod my head.

He really does leave after that, and once I hear his door close, I sink even further into the bed. I feel like I just ran a marathon, a marathon in the desert without shoes or water.

I feel like I'm dying.

I allow myself to fall into a sweaty and fitful sleep.

* * *

When I dream I dream about flying.

Flying high over the ocean. My black wings cast a long shadow along the rippling water as I glide along the wind. In the distance, I see a small row boat floating along the water, rocking with the waves and moving with the sway of the wind.

I fly overhead.

Curled at the bottom of the small row boat is a woman in a white dress.

I soar down and perch on the boat.

She has long brown hair that's frizzy and tangled about her head. It actually reminds me of Hermione when she wakes in the morning after a long night's rest. The girl moves. She looks ill. Her skin is an odd sallow color and she looks impossibly thin.

I hop down on the floor beside her and then I turn into a snake. She doesn't move as I start to slither around her, nudging her awake. She's weak and she looks out of it as she blinks a few times and licks her pale, dry lips that are cracked and bleeding.

She swallows hard, like she was swallowing cotton and when she finally focuses on me she doesn't even looked surprised.

"I will not speak to you, devil," she says in a weak voice as she tries to push herself up, but she slumps against the boat floor in a weak and lazy heap. "It's so hot," she whispers.

I slither to the edge of the boat and I turn my form again.

"You could speak to me in that form," I tell her, knowing full well she was a parslemouth. "You just refuse to. You're so boring," I say with a sigh. "Your whole family is... besides your sisters," I whistle. "Aren't they just a joy to be around," I say sarcastically, but she hardly notices.

This time, I'm a tall man in a black robe and I help the girl sit up, propping her up against the edge of the boat because she's too weak to stand herself. Her white dress is filthy and looks like she's been wearing it for days. Dangling around her neck is a necklace on a long gold chain with a yellow stone on the end. I want to touch it, but I don't.

"My Lady," I say with a smirk on my face. My voice is deep and strong.

It's almost scary.

"My Lord," she says and I laugh.

It's a short bark of a laugh.

The girl tries to focus her tired eyes again, and when they land on mine, she lets her delicate draw drop.

"It's you," she says and I'm feeling rather smug as I pick some lint from my robe and flick it to the sea. "My Lord killed you last spring."

"Did he?" I ask with a raised brow. I put my hands together in between my knees and I smile. "It looks as though I am very much alive, wouldn't you say?"

"I saw you burn," she says, sounding stronger as she tries to sit a bit straighter.

"Did you?" I question. "How do you know it was me?"

"You're the Soothsayer that was banished from court. I saw you die." I suppose if she had been strong enough she would have yelled that. "You are an evil warlock."

"No," I say smugly. "I am a powerful wizard. There is a difference. And you," I lean forward and press my finger to her knee. "Are a witch."

"I am not," she hisses hatefully.

"Your husband seems to think so," I say as I lean back again. "Isn't that why you're out here?" I ask as I dip my hand over the side to touch the water and I flick some up so it lands on that filthy white dress of hers.

"He is confused," the woman says as she inhales deeply. It's a rattling breath. She's dying. "He was tricked by my wicked sisters. He is a good man. He is not evil like you."

"I'm not the one who sent you out in this boat to die, now did I? How evil does that make me then?" I ask rhetorically as the woman blinks, trying to keep her eyes open. "You know," I say as I casually cross my legs, my robe falls back to reveal black leather shoes with silver buckles. "You could have easily left this predicament you're in. If only you would tap into the magic that you know you possess."

"Magic is the work of the devil," the woman says and I roll my eyes.

"Saints do it, it's a miracle, everyone else it's evil. Perfect logic," I say sarcastically and she narrows her tired eyes. "I did not come here for conversation," I say, sounding more serious. "I came here to make a proposition for you," I continue and she stares at me with her dark eyes sullen. "Your sons are not dead," I say and energy flickers in her eyes once more at the mentions of her children. "Not totally," I correct myself.

"What does that mean?" she asks, her voice full of hope and newly found strength.

"I saw your sister's drowning the children," I tell her as I let my eyes dance along her face. Now she looks like she's in pain. "They left them in the water, hoping the current would take them away and the animals would feast on their flesh." The woman crinkles her nose and covers her mouth at the thought. "But they came to me instead," I tell her and her eyes water. "They were not completely dead," I tell her.

"What does that mean?" she asks again, leaning forward to get closer to me.

"I could bring them back to life with that evil magic that you find so repulsive," I explain, looking right into her eyes. "But magic needs it's balance and to bring your children back, there will be a price."

She's silent for a very long time.

When she speaks again, I know that I've won.

"What price?" She asks, her voice low and strange.

I smile and then pull the dagger from my robes.

"To do this, I would require a fee, if you will," I tell her and she frowns as she looks at the dagger with trepidation. "You come from a very strong line of magical folk who have stupidly hidden it from the rest of the world. People like us should not be in hiding. We are Superior, closer to God than any other thing on Earth."

"You speak blasphemous things," the once beautiful woman says. "God will smite you for such talk."

"Yes, I'm sure," I sneer sarcastically before getting back to it. "But, if you want your children to live full, healthy lives... then you must agree to something for me."

She doesn't say anything so I continue.

"I have seen what is to come if a union of our blood lines comes to pass," I tell her thoughtfully. "And I must say I enjoy the picture it paints. A world where people such as us are not reviled or hidden in the shadows, but held up as Gods to be revered and worshiped all over the world. After all, the Holy Lord is but a powerful wizard in all his glory, is he not?"

She wants to say something about God and smiting again... I can just tell, but she doesn't have the strength.

"What do you want?" she says flatly.

"I want a promise," I tell her as I dance the dagger blade along my palm. "From you to me through blood. I want an oath that will promise one of your descendents to mine. Unbreakable through blood and unstoppable through magic."

"If this is the future you see," she says softly. "Then why must I promise you anything?"

I sneer a bit. I didn't expect her to question me. "What could happen doesn't always come to pass. There is always an alternative road to be taken. I just want to make sure that this story takes the road I wish it to take," I explain flatly. "It is all for the betterment of our kind and the future of our race."

"How do I know you're not lying?" she whispers through cracked lips.

I take out my wand, a crude thing made from a three branch, not sanded and unstained. I put it at my temple. Out of it I pull a memory, and I flash it in front of her eyes so she can watch. Her babies cry as the sisters take them in the middle of the night... their struggles as they're held underwater... their blue lips as I fished them from the sea... the tomb in which I placed them, still breathing the shallowest of breaths, holding onto that spark of life just by the softest magic.

"Why do you leave them there?" she asks with a sob in her throat because she knows such images could not be false.

"They will stay there unless I have your word," I tell her harshly.

She nods her head.

I smile again.

I slice my palm and then hers.

I grab her hand so that our blood mingles.

Yellow bands of light circle our hands, binding them together and once the spell is complete, I go to hand her the dagger, but she just stares at it.

She gives me a questioning look. "What is this for?"

"One life for two," I tell her as her dark eyes take in the dagger as I hold it up to the sun. I can see my reflection in the blade. I see an older man with a strong jaw staring back at me and red hair that shines in the sun. Red hair, Weasley hair, my hair. "A mother's sacrifice is very powerful magic, you understand," I say as I offer the blade handle to her. "For me to bring your children back to a full life, you must die. Magic must balance. I can't bring them back without a sacrifice."

"You want to kill me?" she whispers as she eyes the dagger.

"You're dying anyways," I say seriously and it's true. "And I don't want to kill you," I say with a smirk and I wait for her shoulders to slump in relief. "I want you to kill yourself," I say, almost smiling at the panic in her eyes.

"Blood for blood, tooth for tooth... and all that," I tell her with a smile. She doesn't say anything for a great while as she stares down at the blade.

I hand it to her.

She takes it this time.

"Blood for blood," I repeat as I nod at the dagger.

She doesn't move.

I pull the memory with my wand again and flash her children in front of her once more. They're playing, running around, dancing, laughing, and alive.

Her lower lip trembles and then with a shaking hand she brings the dagger up to her neck.

She presses hard and slices quickly.

The blood comes pouring out as she falls back, slumping against the bottom of the boat. That filthy white dress soaks up some of the red blood as it pools around my shiny black shoes. I pick up the dagger and wipe it off with a part of her dress as her blood spills all over the boat.

My hands are covered in her blood.

I hold up the dagger to the sun again and look at my reflection.

I'm smiling.

I wake with a start and tense when I feel Draco's hand wrap around my middle. "Just a dream," I hear him whisper against my ear.

My breath is coming out in short gasps and when Draco kisses just under my ear, I try to relax.

Just a dream. It was just a dream. If I keep telling myself that maybe I'll stop shaking.

"Nightmare?" he asks softly and I nod my head, trying to get the image of that woman cutting her throat out of my mind.

It's disturbing.

My heart is fluttering a mile a minute and I blink a few times in rapid succession, trying to tell myself that it was a dream and now things are real. In bed, with Draco. That's real.

My hands still feel like they're stained with blood and I hold them up to see them in the morning light just to make sure. There's nothing there... but I can't help but _feel_ it.

"What are you doing?" he asks as I stare at my hands like I had never seen them before.

_I've always liked you in red._

I shake that voice from my head. Tom's voice.

"Nothing," I whisper softly as his arm tightens around me.

I take his hand and intertwine our fingers, bringing them up to my face where I rest my lips against the back of his hand. I close my eyes. My mouth feels disgusting and with a cringe I realize I haven't brushed my teeth yet. Draco scoots a bit closer to me so his chest is pressed right against my back and I shift uncomfortably when I feel his arousal pressing against me.

I do not want to have sex right now. I feel terrible. "I'm tired," I whisper so he won't try anything. I feel gross and sick and everything unattractive under the sun.

I try to curve my body so it's not touching his, but he holds me closer. "I can't help it," he says tiredly with a yawn and I feel the corner of my mouth tilt up the slightest bit because his voice sounds so soft and so... un-Draco like.

I kiss his hand.

"But don't kiss me," he says seriously and I laugh a little. "That won't help anything."

"Sorry," I say as I roll on my back and stretch my arms out before settling again. I'm still wearing the cheer-leading uniform from yesterday and I'm sure I look a right mess right about now. I bring my hand up to cover my mouth because I know my breath smells disgusting.

"You still look tired," Draco points out and I frown at him because that's basically saying I look like crap.

I feel like crap so that can't be too far off. He brings his hand up and runs his fingers over my profile. Tracing the line of my nose all the way down my chin.

"Go back to sleep," he says gently as he pulls his hand back. "I am going to take a shower."

I nod my head. It sounds like a good idea, actually.

I turn my head and close my eyes as as he gets off the bed and when the bathroom door closes, I turn on my side again.

I can't get that woman and her dark eyes out of my head, though. I try to go back to sleep, I really do, but I just can't so I sit up and let my feet rest on the cold floor as I rub sleep from my eyes. When I pull back I see my make up rubbed off on my fingers and I sigh.

Lovely.

I look at the glass of water on the night stand and I pick it up greedily, gulping it down quickly in a few swallows. I didn't realize how thirsty I was and when I put the glass back down on the table I wish there was more. I don't really feel like moving, though, so I put my elbows on my knees and close my eyes as I rest my chin in my hands. That dream seemed so vivid and real... like the dreams I have with Tom that have haunted me since I was eleven.

I shake my head again, but my eyes snap open the someone opens the door.

It's Blaise and he pauses in the doorway when he see me sitting on the bed. "Where's Draco?" he asks suspiciously as he looks around the room like I was playing some sort of trick on him.

"He's in the shower," I say in a scratchy voice as I nod to the bathroom door where the shower water can be heard.

He nods his head in acceptance and he looks around the room one more time before carefully stepping in.

He's fully dressed for a casual day off from classes. He's wearing a pair of dark denim jeans and a black v neck jumper that fits him perfectly, outlining his Quidditch players body. His shoulders aren't as broad as Draco's and he's a little bit thicker in his shape. I have no idea why I'm even comparing the two, to be honest... and I have no idea why I'm even noticing what he's wearing. It's weird and I shake it off. Under his arm is a leather potions kit and he stares at me for a few moments before raising his brows and walking further in the room, the door shutting behind him with a snap.

I cough. "What are you doing here?" I ask and I cough again because I seem to have something in the back of my throat.

He sets the kit on the writing desk and I stare at his back as he opens it and takes a few things out. "Did you know that my father was a very well known healer?" he asks as he holds up some kind of vial to the morning light. It shines like liquid gold against the sun and I see it disappear again as he places it on the desk.

"Your real father?" I state because I know Zabini has had a series of step fathers over the years. He nods his head sharply as he rolls up his sleeves. "What happened to him?" I question softly. I guess because it's so early in the morning, and I'm still a little off kilter by the dream, I feel a little braver when speaking to him.

"He died," he says flatly and I nod my head as I stand up.

"I know that but..." I trail off and furrow my brows as I cross my arms. It's cold and I'm still wearing that ridiculous cheer-leading outfit from the game yesterday. I grab one of Draco's blankets and I wrap it around me as I walk towards the writing desk, right towards Zabini. When I get closer to him, his amber eyes flick to mine and I realize how tactless I'm being. "Nevermind," I say as I look away. "Forget it."

He stares at me a little longer before shaking his head and going back to his potions kit.

"You look like hell, Weasley," he says and I know it's true, but my cheeks blush anyways.

"Thanks," I mutter as I try to tame my hair because its all loose and wild, having come loose from my pony tail some time during the night.

He eyes me again, like he thought I was going to do something to him, and then he taps his lip.

"You have blood right here," he says as he studies my face.

"Oh," I say as I bring my hand up to cover it. I guess I do from where I bit it last night and my cheeks blush again as I try to lick it off. "What are you doing?" I ask after I give up trying to look presentable. He's lining up ten little bottles of different colored potions on the desk.

"Getting my things ready," he says as he pulls a thick leather bound book from inside of the kit. In gold letters on the well worn leather cover is the name _C. Zabini._

"Why?"

His eyes flick to the door where Draco is still taking his shower and then he goes back to his things. "Let's wait on Malfoy, shall we?" he says and I frown a bit as I take a seat in Draco's writing chair.

"Of course," I say tiredly. "No one tells me anything."

"Maybe that's because you whine all the time," he says and I shoot him a hateful look. "Don't look at me like that's not true," he says with his mouth curved up in a cruel smirk. "Poor Ginny, her boyfriend doesn't tell her anything, she didn't make the quidditch team, girls are mean to her," he keeps going, making fun of all the things in my life that bother me and when he's finished he scoffs at my glare. "Come on, Ginny Weasley. Your life is good right now. I can tell you, I wouldn't be as forgiving as Draco has been if you were mine."

"What do you mean?" I say with my arms folded across my chest. I kind of want to hit him and I don't like word _mine_ for some reason.

"I mean that Malfoy is really nice to you and you don't even appreciate it."

"He's not always nice to me," I admit as I think over our relationship and Blaise snaps his kit shut so loudly it makes me jump.

"You have no idea what he's like when you're not around," he says as he glances at me, the light hitting his eyes making them shine like gold. "He's _nice_ to you, Weasley, and Draco is rarely nice to anyone."

"I've seen him be polite to many people." I feel like I should defend Draco. Even though he could be a right jerk sometimes, I like to believe that underneath it all he's sweet.

He nods his head. "That's his charm. He does it to get what he wants. Come on, Gin," he says and when he says my name like that it makes the hairs on the back on my neck stand on end. "We all have that gift," he says with a wink.

Ugh, Zabini. I shake my head and run my fingers along a groove on the writing desk. Blaise watches my finger run along the wood and when I notice the dirt under my fingernails, I quickly remove my hand in tuck it inside the blanket.

"Sometimes I think..." I say as I glance at the shower door again. "Sometimes I think he's using me." I admit as I think of my blood and everything that's transpired this year.

"Of course he is," he says with a small smile. "He uses everyone, but I will point out that he doesn't hold my hand in the hallways."

I lean back in the chair and narrow my eyes a bit. "So?" I say sharply and he raises one of his dark brows.

"I think you need to appreciate the fact that Draco is trying to be good to you," he says seriously and it makes me frown. "He doesn't have to be. There are other ways of getting what he wants from you," he points out and I narrow my eyes as I think about the time when he ordered me not to give my blood to Rookwood. He used me just to get information. "If you want him to tell you things, get better at blocking your mind. If you want him to stop being mad at you for being around other guys, then stop kissing and hugging blokes when no one else is around..."

"But..." I try to explain myself about the whole Dean situation but Blaise cuts me off.

"But nothing," he says with a sigh and then he look at me again. "Malfoy doesn't trust anyone. He never has and he never will." he says with narrowed eyes.

I stand up and take a step closer to him. I'm in fighting mode now.

"You're his friend. Doesn't he trust you?" I counter back sarcastically because I don't know why we're talking about this.

"No, he doesn't and with good reason," he says under his breath as he turns back to his potions.

"Why's that?" I press because I'm annoyed with him.

"Don't get me wrong, he can trust me with the important things," he says as he holds up some kind of vial of odd looking purple leaves. "It's just that I've always coveted his belongings," he says and then he flicks me a dark glance that makes me uncomfortable. "I can't help it." he says as he licks his lips. "He always seems to have the best of things..." He looks away. "Maybe they just seem like the best because they're his..." he adds with a raised brow like he was thinking it through. He looks at me again. "It's one of my character flaws," he says softly and then he turns back to the potion. "Not that I have many," he adds smugly in true Blaise Zabini fashion.

I don't say anything and he continues.

"It's been this way since we were small," he says and then he taps one of his canine teeth with the vial. "Draco would have the brand new toy my mother would never buy me and I would _want _it," he says in a serious voice as he looks out the window. "Doesn't mean I always got it," he adds flatly. "I learned that lesson the hard way when we were eight," he says with a smirk. "He knocked this out," he taps his tooth again. "I took his favorite broom and he took my tooth," he explains and then he licks his perfect lips before looking at me again. "It took two days for the healers to grow it back."

That's a disgusting story and when I make a face, Blaise catches it and smiles a little. A humorless little smile that tugs at the corner of his mouth.

"So, I say again, be more appreciative of how nice he is to you. His ruthless, Weasley. That's a lesson you never want to learn."

My frown deepens. "Is that kind of like a threat?" I ask uncomfortably and he looks at me once more.

"Take advantage of it while you have it. You aren't the only one bonded to Malfoy, Weasley, but he doesn't spoon anyone else at night and you should remember that. You're a part of this now and you're stuck. Do you want to man up and be a partner, or will you be joining the gardening club like the other mindless house wives in our society? Spending your summers at Yellow Springs, drinking ice tea while real wizards and witches are out there working to better our race."

I am so confused and I furrow my brows. "What do you mean by the bonded thing?" I ask seriously with an uneasy feeling in my heart. There are so many questions I want to ask him right now, but one sentence really stuck out in my head during his little speech.

I wasn't the only one bonded to Draco. What did that mean?

Blaise pauses for a second and runs his free hand through his thick dark hair like he was unsure if he should keep talking. "He doesn't have a harem of wives running around if that's what you're thinking," he says. "There are different kind of bonds and Draco has always been three steps ahead of everyone else. He might not be able to see the future, but he's prepared for it. Even when we were young and didn't know any better, he was thinking years down the line when we were thinking days," he adds, his voice sounding softer like he didn't want anyone else to over hear... softer and almost bitter.

"What does that mean?" I ask softly and he gives me a sharp look with his golden eyes narrowed.

"That means," he says as he glances at the bathroom door again. "Stop standing so goddamn close to me."

I take a step back just because of all the venom in his voice and a second later, the shower stops. Draco comes out of the bathroom after a couple of moments. He's buttoning up his slacks with a shirt thrown over his shoulder and when he sees Blaise standing by the writing desk, he raises a brow. I sit back down and wrap the blanket around me like it might protect me from everything bad in the world.

"You're early," he points out. He walks to the bedside table and picks up his watch to secure it on his wrist.

"Better than being late," Zabini says as he turns back to the desk.

I fold the blanket around me a bit tighter as I watch Draco put on his shirt. It's just a basic long sleeve shirt, but it's red, a very chromatic red that looks really good on him.

I don't think I've seen him in red yet. I like him in red.

He walks over to me and puts his hand on my shoulder, placing a kiss on the top of my head. "Are you feeling better?" he asks. He smells really nice and clean now and I feel gross all over again when I realize how disgusting I am right now. When his fingers dance along the curve of my neck, I can't find it in me to look at him or Zabini so I stare at the floor with a blush staining my cheeks.

"Yes, a little," I admit softly. He holds onto my earlobe for a moment before letting it drop and stepping away. "Why is he here?" I ask as I look at Zabini with an eyebrow raised. "He wouldn't tell me."

"I asked him to come so he could do a few spells to find out what happened to you last night," he says as he uses the towel to dry out his messy hair.

Blaise pulls out Draco's potions cauldron from his closet and sets it on the desk as well. I purse my lips when I see it.

"Why can't I just go to the hospital wing?" I ask as I eye Blasie. "With a real healer?"

"You hurt my heart, Weasley," Zabini says as he pulls a toothpick from his pocket and he puts it between his teeth while he works. "You really do."

"Discretion I think is best right now," Draco answers as he runs his hand up my arm again like he was petting me. "And besides, Zabini knows his stuff. Don't you, Blaise?" he says and Zabini nods his head.

"Of course," he says and he gives me a sly smirk that makes me doubt it. "Alright, just hold still then," he says as he takes out his wand.

My back stiffens a little when I see it pointed at my chest. Draco squeezes my shoulder reassuringly as Zabini kneels in front of me and scans his wand over my body. He's whispering a spell through his lips that makes the tip of his wand glow purple. After a few moments, a grouping of odd looking purple symbols appear glowing on his his wand. He frowns at them and stands up as I crane my neck to see his wand better. He walks towards the desk and then opens that leather bound book to scan the pages.

Draco runs his fingers over my mess of a hair.

"What is it?" I ask as he flicks through the pages of that old looking book.

"It looks like..." he says and then he looks at Draco. I look at Draco too and then he says something I don't understand in a different language.

Draco answers back in the same foreign language and I clench my fists. How fucking annoying.

"Stop doing that," I hiss as I glare at both of them. "You know I don't know what you're saying."

"I know it's rude," Draco says as he starts petting me again. He nods towards Blaise.

"You have way too many magical things on you," Zabini explains as he looks down at his book. "Your body is overheating. Your magic can't balance all of it out."

"What magical things?" I ask sharply.

Blaise looks at the symbols glowing on his wand again. "You have two magical objects that are full of spells," he says and I look up at Draco.

"Take off the necklace, Ginny," Draco says flatly. I clench jaw and grip the necklace my mother gave me.

"No," I say hatefully. "Take off this bracelet you gave me."

He sighs, like I was being tiresome and he kneels by my chair so his face is level with mine. "Take off the necklace," he orders again and I flick a glance at Zabini because we just had a talk about how "nice" Draco is to me. What a joke.

"No," I say again, a little more firmly this time around. "If I take it off my parents will never be able to find me," I tell him seriously and I move away when he goes to take the necklace off for me.

"You're a part of my family now," he says sharply, like I was starting to piss him off. "It's my responsibility to take care of you. The bracelet stays, the necklace goes," he snaps at me and I glare. He stares me down for a few moments before sighing and running his fingers along my jaw. "Just for now," he explains. "Until we find out exactly what happened yesterday. You don't have to throw it away or anything. Just take it off of your neck," he says softly as he studies my face. "The bracelet is a lot harder to take off," he adds.

I clench my jaw for a few seconds before letting him unclasp the necklace. He takes it and puts it in his pocket as Blaise goes back to reading his wand. "I want that back," I tell him as he stands again.

He nods then he turns back to Blaise. "A pureblooded witch can handle those things," he says as I stare at his pocket. Draco has a habit of not giving things back and I refuse to allow that to happen to my necklace. "A bonding and charmed object wouldn't make her system go so far out of it."

"You're right," Zabini says as he reads his book once more. "There's something more. The..." he trails off as he reads from the book and then he flicks his eyes to his wand again. "The Sangius Charm," he says and I frown because I don't know what that is. "And she also has a binding spell on her."

I watch Draco's face as his jaw tightens.

"Binding?" he says flatly, like he was angry, and Blaise nods, flicking his amber eyes to Draco.

"A very old one," he explains and they share a significant look before they both look at me.

"Fuck," I hear Draco say heatedly and then he goes to his bed, where he rests his hand on one of the posts. "The Sangius Charm...Does that explain the vomit?" Draco asks and I crinkle my nose as Blaise nods his head.

"Possibly."

"What would cause it to boil over now?" Draco asks with a frown and Blaise shrugs.

"Stress probably..."

"What is the Sangius Charm?" I ask carefully. I felt like I was intruding on something personal between the two of them, but damnit, it was my body! "And why is it on me?"

"It's a blood thing," Draco says dismissively like my question was unimportant.

"What type of blood thing?" I press even more.

"It goes along with the binding that's on you," he says and I furrow my brows.

"What's a binding?" I never know anything and it's frustrating.

I feel stupid all the time. I hate feeling stupid.

"It's like a promise," Draco says as he looks at me with a raised eyebrow. "The bonding would get rid of a binding," he says seriously.

"Unless it was an old and powerful binding," Zabini adds.

Old and powerful. I know someone old and powerful and I make a face as I think of Voldemort. "How do I get rid of it?" I ask and they both look at me. I stand up with the blanket still wrapped around me like armor. "How do I get rid of it?" I repeat.

Zabini looks at Draco and then back to me with a sinful smirk on his face. "How do you feel about maternity clothes?"

"Blaise," Draco hisses, making that smirk drop from his smug face. "Give her the potion and then you can leave."

Blaise nods. I watch him as he throws a few potions into the cauldron and then he warms it with his wand until it hisses. After a few moments, he dips a cup into it and hands it to me.

"What will this do?" I ask suspiciously. I don't want to just take an unnamed potion from Blaise freaking Zabini.

"It will help balance your magic so you don't overheat again," he says flatly and I glance at Draco as I bring it up to my lips.

I take a sip. It tastes like tea and I down it in a gulp as both boys stare at me closely. I hand the cup back to Zabini and he pours the rest of the potion into a clear container that he puts on the writing desk.

"For later," he tells Draco and my boyfriend nods his head with his arms crossed over his strong chest.

I watch Blaise pack up his things and when he leaves, Draco walks towards me. "Did that help?" he asks as he kneels down in front of me. I nod my head. I guess I don't feel as sick and he brushes some hair away from my face. " I think you should relax a bit, yes? I can start you a bath."

"I don't want to have a baby," I tell him, still reeling by Zabini's comment. I feel like I should tell him that right now. With my luck and the way Draco is, I probably wouldn't even know I was pregnant until I was holding the baby in my arms. "I _will_ not have a baby," I tell him sharply to get my point across.

"I know," he says as he stands. "Neither do I. Not now anyways," he adds, giving me a warm smile but I just can't return it. He lets that smile fade and he looks out the window with a frown on his face. "I'll figure something out. This just kind of throws me off guard."

"It's Voldemort, isn't it?" I ask flatly as I stand up to follow Draco into the bathroom as he offers me his hand. "The binding spell?" I add.

"Who else would it be?" he asks as he walks towards the tub and he turns on the water.

"I hate my life," I mutter to myself as I lean against the counter. I don't even have anymore tears to cry and I shake my head angrily before turning to the sink and grabbing my spare tooth brush. I start brushing my teeth as Draco sits on the edge of the tub and watches my every movement like his life depended on it.

When my teeth are clean, I put the tooth brush back and take off the blanket. "Is the water ready?" I ask as I lay it on the counter and I turn to Draco.

He nods his head as he runs his fingers under the tap and he turns off the water once the tub is full.

I look at him for a moment. That cut I remember seeing on his face yesterday is gone and I figure he must have healed it while I was asleep.

He stands as I fiddle with the zipper of the skirt and he walks towards the counter, leaning against it with his arms crossed as he watches me undress. I don't even care. Draco is a voyeur when it comes to me taking off my clothes and I don't feel like fighting with him about it right now. I let the uniform fall into a messy pile on the floor and I shiver a bit when I'm left in my underwear. I glance at Draco once over my shoulder as he watches me with darkened eyes and I shake my head before turning back towards the tub and unhooking my bra.

"You have beautiful skin," he says, but I don't respond as I put my thumbs in the waist band of my knickers and pull them down.

I kick them to the side and step into the tub, trying not to be awkward about it because I have an audience right now.

Once I sink into the warm water, I sigh in relief because it feels so good. I rest against the back and close my eyes as I let my body relax. This was a good idea. It does feel good.

"I want to talk to you," Draco says and I crack my eyes open, looking at him with a raised brow as he walks back to sit on the edge of the tub.

I sigh.

"About what?" I ask as I pick up the soap bottle and I squirt some of it onto a wash cloth. I wash my face first to get rid of the make up, and the gunk, and the blood.

"About what I was speaking to my father about yesterday," he says as I start washing my shoulder. I wish he wasn't in here right now. There is nothing sexy about washing myself in front of him. I just want to relax and be ugly for a second. Can't he just let that happen?

"Okay," I say slowly.

He licks his teeth and then dips his hand down into the water, running his fingers over my leg. He keeps petting me today. It's kind of weird, actually.

"Odette was right when she said that the Dark Lord has noticed how fond I am of you," he says as his hand tightens around my knee.

"Alright," I say flatly, waiting for this to go some where.

"I don't want you to take this the wrong way," he says, running his fingers along the inside of my thigh. "But we're going to have to break up," he says and my heart feels like it just dropped into my stomach.

I didn't think I'd ever hear that coming from him and my voice got caught in my throat.

"Not for real, obviously," he says when I sit up straight. "We're still bonded and we're still going to be together technically, but for the public, we're going to have to keep it on the down low. Rookwood and Umbridge have been telling the Dark Lord how... attached I am," he says flatly. "And he's seen it in my thoughts. You've been on the forefront of my mind lately and I think he knows it. I have to be seen courting other girls. I don't want you to be upset about it," he says, giving me a little smile. "You know where my heart lies and I know where you will lie every night," he says with a sinful smile in an attempt to be playful.

I bite my lip and draw my knees up to my chest so he can't touch me anymore.

"I..." I stop myself as I think about Rookwood. "Draco, the last time Rookwood took my blood, I told him that my husband told me not to. When he summoned the Dark Lord, they started talking about Harry and how close my family is to him. It was like they assumed I was talking about him instead of you." I sit up straighter as I think it through. "Obviously Rookwood knew we were together. We're always together and we touch in the hallways," I tell him and then I think about it with my eyes narrowed in thought. "And your father told Rookwood we were dating. Everyone knows we're together. Why would it bother him now?"

He's silent for a few moments and then he looks into my eyes.

"Odette wasn't the only one who was asked to look after you," he says flatly. "They were hoping I'd be able to turn your views so they fell in line with the Dark Lord's new regime. As you can see, I've been falling short on that order."

And there it was.

I felt like a bag of bricks were just thrown at my chest.

I sit in the bathtub, staring at him until the water turns cold.

After forever, I finally find my voice to speak. "Is that the only reason you started dating me?" I ask flatly, almost afraid of the answer.

"Of course not," he says.

Of course not.

I stand up and grab a towel, wrapping it around my body. The pathetic truth is that I would forgive Draco anything in the world if I thought he loved me as much as I loved him. With a breaking heart, I realize that I don't believe he does. Not anymore, not right now when the truth was staring me so strikingly in the face.

Blaise said that Draco uses everyone and he uses his charm to get what he wants... I glance at Draco's intense silver eyes again as I tighten the towel around my body. I just took a bath, but I never felt more dirty.

I shake my head and head towards the door, pushing him to the side.

He follows me into the bedroom.

"Then why?" I ask as I dig through the drawer that holds my spare things.

"You know why," he says to the back of my head as I quickly get dressed. I can't even look at him in fear of breaking totally.

"Because of my blood," I snap and when I'm dressed I look at him with a hand on my hip.

He sighs. "Don't be ridiculous," he says and I raise my brows. "You have been a perfect storm of everything I want and need. I won't feel bad about that."

"Right," I say and then I nod my head as I lick my lips. "You know, it won't be so hard to pretend to be broken up," I tell him as I gather my things from his drawer to take with me. If the Dark Lord told him to look after me, then there was no way he just wanted me on his own... if he found out he could use my blood for his stupid plans... then again, there is no way he just wanted to be with me for me. "Because I think it sounds like a good idea to spend some time apart right about now."

"Stop being dramatic," he says with an eye roll. "Everyone who matters will know that you're still mine and I will kill anyone who tries to take you from me," he says darkly and I glare.

He doesn't want anyone taking his golden ticket to Voldemort, is all. He could care less if I was just Ginny... no magic blood and of no importance to anyone.

"I'm not being dramatic," I snap at him. "You know, you use me for everything," I tell him, not sure if that's true, but I'm so angry it just feels right. "Even if you are nice to me," I say as I think of my conversation with Blaise. "This is a one sided relationship. I don't get anything from you."

"That's not true."

"Not the important stuff anyways," I tell him hatefully and he shakes his head, taking a step closer.

"Ginny, I love you. You know that. What more do you want?"

"I want to believe that you mean that, but the more I learn, the more I realize that you don't." He doesn't say anything to that. He just angrily shakes his head. "I used to write all the time," I tell him as I run a hand through my bangs in frustration. "I haven't even touched my notebook in weeks."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

I feel my shoulders slump a bit. "Exactly," I say softly as I hold out my hand. "Give me my mother's necklace," I snap. "Give it back now."

"If you wear it, you might get sick again," he says as he digs through his pocket to get it.

"Are you going to order me not to wear it?" I ask with an angry brow raised and he tilts his chin up with his eyes narrowed, but he doesn't say anything to that.

He he hands it to me and I snap it out of his grip.

"Bye," I tell him seriously as I get all of my things in order.

"Ginny," he says, stopping me before I reach the door. "Don't push me. I always get what I want in the end and Zabini was right when he said I could be ruthless. You don't want to find out just how ruthless I can be."

I look over my shoulder and level him with a cold glare. "Try me," is all I say and I see his glare turn cold as I go back to the door.

I leave his room and I don't even bother to look back.

* * *

The room of requirement is full of books today, and I run my fingers along the spines as I read the titles. They all seem to be year books, dating all the way back to the founding of the school. I wonder what year book would look like when photos weren't around and when I open an old looking book dating 1535, I see drawings in black ink.

How clever.

I shake my head and close the year book. Dust flies up and I sneeze before moving on. I spend hours, picking up random books and when I pick up one from the forties, my heart stops beating for a moment when I see Tom Riddle staring at me through the page. Head Boy, is written under his photo with all of his many accomplishments and I bite the inside of my cheek as I stare into the young Dark Lord's eyes.

I wonder what my life would be like with a person... a monster... like him. What if Draco or Harry don't succeed in their plans? I shudder to think of it. I rip the photo of Tom out of the year book and fold it over, putting it in my pocket as I continue down the rows. I fiddle through a few other year books before I find a photo of Draco from last year, on his broom out on the Quidditch pitch in the sports section. He looks handsome in it, like always, and my heart aches to see him. I love him. I don't think that feeling will ever go away no matter how sad and angry I get. I tear that out as well and place it with Tom's. There are a few large chalk boards on the walls and I walk towards one with soft steps. I take out the pictures I had taken and tack them on the opposite ends of the green board.

I pick up a piece of chalk and write my name in the middle.

Tom wants my blood.

I draw a line from Tom to my name. Draco wants to kill Tom. I draw a line from Draco to Tom. To kill Tom, Draco needs my blood. I draw a line from me to Draco. I know Harry Potter. I write his name on the board and draw a line from him to me. Tom hates Harry. Another line. Draco hates Harry. Another line. Harry is like family. I write my surname on the board to represent everyone and I draw a line from Harry to Weasley. Draco was the last person to have my password. Another line. Death Eaters invaded my home, taking my parents. Another line. Draco's friends are bonded to him as well. Another line.

Draco is a hardcore pureblood. I write that down and make another line. So is Tom. Another line. Why does Draco want to kill Tom if they believe the same things?

_His blood isn't even pure_.

Draco said that to me once and I make another line connecting me and that word. My blood is pure. Draco's blood is pure. Tom's blood is...

_..Filthy muggle name... _

I shiver when I hear Tom's voice in my head. I don't remember much from my time in the chamber, my therapist said that I blocked most of it out to protect myself from something... She said one day I might remember it all when I'm ready or some rot like that, but every once in a while I can feel it all sitting there in the corner of my mind, just waiting for me to find it.

I write down _impure_ on the board.

I draw a line to Tom.

I spend the better part of an hour, drawing lines from different things that connected the three of us together and when I was finished, I stood back to look at it with the chalk lying loosing in my hand.

It looked like a tangled web.

A tangled web of lies and actions and desires.

I take a seat on the floor as I stare at the mess I created.

I think I've known it all along, but right now I was faced with a very bitter realization. No one actually wanted _me._ When I fought with Hermione before she left, I had told her that I was never any ones number one, and that was still true. I was never with out love in my family, but being the youngest of seven children meant that the love and affection was divided. All I ever wanted was to be in love with someone who loved me just as much.

Tom never loved me when I was eleven. He just used me to get what he wanted.

Hermione was only my friend because my mother refused to let her sleep with the boys when she came over. She used me as a companion when they weren't around.

Dean always ditched me for Seamus when we were dating and it never really bothered me until now I guess. He didn't love me and I never loved him. Things might have been different if he actually put me first.

Pansy and Daphne were only friends with me to please Draco.

Draco...Draco used me for so many things and I truly thought for a moment there that he truly loved me even though the truth was staring me in the face this whole time.

I'm so stupid.

I shake my head and stand up, dropping the chalk on the ground until it shatters.

I will not cry.

I walk out of the room and hike my bag over my shoulders. I take the stairs three at a time and when I reach the cold air of courtyard. I put up the hood of my cloak and walk towards one of the benches. I take a seat and pull out my notebook. Theodore Nott and a few other pureblooded boys are under the archway smoking something that seems illegal because they're all sharing the cigarette thing and they're looking around them with shifty eyes.

Ugh, jerks.

I roll my eyes and take out a pen as I open my book.

I will start writing again. I need to get back to myself.

I just... can't stop thinking of Draco and everything I love and hate him for. It's so frustrating! I can't think of anything new or creative and with an irritated growl, I go the the beginning of my notebook in hopes of finding some inspiration.

I start reading through older stories I had written and I bite my lower lip as I scratch out some sentences with my pen and add a few words here and there...I always let Draco edit my homework because I hardly cared about half my subjects and he was so smart he always added things to make my papers better, but I shouldn't have let him do that. If I wanted to write, then I should have gotten it together and actually tried my best instead of constantly relying on him all the time. I sneer as I scratch out a misspelled word and I write the correction above it as a shadow falls over me. I blink a few times before looking up.

"Luna?" I say with my brow raised.

She is looking awfully pale today and her blue cloak is hanging half off her shoulder, like she had thrown it on as an after thought. In her hands is an open envelope and I eye it curiously.

"Can I sit with you for a moment?" she says as she takes a seat beside me.

I nod my head. Although, it hardly mattered. She was already sitting anyways.

"How's it going?" I ask as she looks over at Theo who's still smoking and laughing with his friends.

"Not very well," she admits and I glance at her. Her hands are shaking and she's breathing oddly.

"What's wrong?" I question. Luna has been acting odd for a while now, but I've been too wrapped up in my own problems to find out too much. I haven't even told her Draco and I have 'broken up' but I suspect she knows because I've been eating all my meals in my room and avoiding his friends at all costs.

It kind of hurts my feelings that she hasn't asked what's wrong with me yet... but I don't even know why I care. I should realize by now no one really cares about me... even after I divulged everything to her.

She hands me the envelope and I take out the letter. It has an official ministry seal on it and I frown as I unfold it. "What is this?" I ask as I read the heading.

_To whom it may concern_...

That's how it starts and Luna's fingers start shaking again. "I can get my father out of Azkaban," she says in a hopeful voice. As my eyes scan the page, I realize how try that is. "They said that he's only a threat level yellow blood traitor and if I can pay that fee, they'll set him free."

"Well, that's good news," I tell her, giving her a half smile because my whole family is in there and I never received a damn letter like this.

"But that's a lot of money," she says and I nod as I look at the total they asked for.

"This is a great deal," I admit softly.

"They froze my father's Gringotts account and I never saved anything from when I worked at Folk Hills. I spent it all on art stuff," she says with her wide eyes pale against the sun.

I look down at the paper again.

"I was wondering if you could ask Malfoy to lend me the money," she says and my head snaps to hers. "I could pay him back," she says quickly and I narrow my eyes a bit when I realize she didn't even notice how bad off I've been these past few days. "I just don't know what to do. That could get him out of that terrible place," she says with tears swimming in her eyes and she looks at Theo again. "He's the only family I have."

"Draco and I broke up," I say sharply and her jaw drops a bit. Hmf. She goes to ask me about it, but I stop her before she can. "I can give you the money," I tell her flatly.

"But.."

I stand up and my hood falls back. "I have enough money in my savings account," I tell her as I put my notebook in my bag. Since Draco's family covered the cost of my tuition this year, my account remained untouched. I have just enough to cover this amount. "I won't be able to go to that stupid writing retreat anyways," I say sharply. "It was a stupid dream and I can't write a damn thing anymore, so you can have the money."

"But..." she says again as she stands up. "What if you could get your family out?" she asks and I swallow hard.

"If that's the amount, I can only afford one," I tell her softly. "And I never received a letter like that."

"We could ask," she says as she reaches out to touch my arm.

I shrug it off.

"There's a mail desk just outside of the castle now. That's where I got this letter," she says as she motions to it. "A man works the desk. I think his name is Sean, and Umbridge's office is in the back. Maybe they would know."

"Would that make you feel better about taking the money?" I ask flatly.

She doesn't say anything, but I assume that's what it is anyways.

I let her lead the way as I follow her outside of the castle grounds. We pass that weird wooden cabin where all the muggle born students have been kept and I stare at it through narrowed eyes as I throw up my hood again. I wonder what they do in there? I wonder what they learn and what they talk about... Just beside that is a new brick 'mail' building of some sort that has a perch for owls at every window.

There are birds all over the roof and on the window sills and I can see wizards in green robes off in the distance, shooting down owls as they try to carry letters to the castle.

I shake my head at it and turn to Luna to follow her inside. "It's sad that we can't even read our own owls," I admit and she nods her head as she holds open the door for me.

There's a small waiting room and a counter that a short man with a round nose is behind. He's sorting through letters that have already been opened and putting them into different mail slots. I assume that's Sean.

"Hi there," Luna says as she approaches the man. He turns and looks at her, one of his eyes is a milky white and the other is a dark brown. It makes him look a little terrifying. "I have a question about the letter I received," she says as she puts it on the counter. Sean looks at it and then back to her.

"Yes?" he says in a grunt and I press my lips together as he itches his stomach.

Charming.

"I was wondering if this would work for all prisoners?" she says, sparing me a little glance. "Like for a member of the Weasley family perhaps?"

"Of course not," A sugary sweet voice from the back answers and I crinkle my nose as Umbridge walks towards the counter from the doorway in the back. She has a stack of opened letters in her hand and her pink heels are tapping annoying against the floor. "The Weasley's are threat level red blood-traitors. They will never be leaving Azkaban," she says sharply as she hands the stack to the man. "Sort these for me, will you?" she says and the man gets right to it. Sorting through the names and putting them them in the slots along the wall like his life depended on it.

"Even my mother?" I say as I take a step closer to the counter. Umbridge is wearing a pink tweed dress and matching jacket that makes her look like some kind of couch cover... an unattractive, lumpy couch cover. "She's threat level red?" I say sarcastically. "She's a housewife. How can she be that dangerous?"

"I don't make the rules, Miss Weasley," she replies with her toad like face scrunched up in disdain. "I just follow them."

"Right," I roll my eyes and she glares. I don't even care. "Am I allowed to pay for this?" I ask as I thrust Luna's letter at her. She reads it with her cold eyes narrowed and when she's done she looks at me with a questioning brow raised.

"You want to pay this?" she says and I nod my head as I dig out my pen from my bag again. "This is a great sum of money, you realize."

"I know that," I snap.

"It is my understanding that the Weasley family has never been of great means," she says and I give her a glare.

"Can I pay for it or not?"

"I would watch the attitude if I were you," she says and I make a face.

"Or what?"

"You know," she says as she leans in closer so she can whisper. "You are this close," she says, holding up her thumb and forefinger to show me the distance. "To being sent to Azkaban for re-education. Just give us a reason."

I smile unpleasantly. "Can I pay for this, or not?" I repeat a little more sharply and she leans back, giving me a surveying look.

"You can," she says as she shows me the back of the form that has a space for a Gringotts number and signature for payment. "But if the payment bounces, you have to pay the charge fees."

She's such a bitch.

I shake my head, but don't say anything as I fill out the form. Once it's finished and I sign on the agreement line, she grabs it form me and looks it over like she was checking for any mistakes. I watch her with my brows furrowed as she stuffs it into a new envelope and whistles for an owl.

I think of my family rotting away in Azkaban and I think of Voldemort because he's the reason for it.

I hate him.

"Can I send out a letter?" I ask quickly before she can disappear again.

"To whom are you sending it to?" she asks as she blinks a few times.

I don't say anything right away as I take out my note book and I tear out a page. Luna hovers beside me, but I ignore it as I jot down a quick letter full of requests. I have something he needs, then he should give me something I want, right?

It's worth a try.

When I'm finished, I hand it to Umbridge and she rolls her eyes before scanning the page. Then a little smirk graces the corner of her mouth.

"The Dark Lord does not read such letters," she says as she goes to throw it away, but I grab it from her.

"Just send it to someone who will read it," I tell her because it's worth trying for. My family shouldn't be in jail. Especially not my parents. They're harmless. "I don't care who reads it as long as it's someone who might be able to do something about it."

"This is just ridiculous."

"Send it," I demand with a little more bravado. "Or the next time I see him, I will tell him that you denied my communication to his staff."

She glares at me for a while and I suppose she saw that as a sufficient threat because she stuffed it in an envelope and whistled for another owl. "Send this to the Ministry complaint department," she says while giving me a nasty smile.

I don't even bother saying thank you and I put my pen behind my ear as I watch the owl fly away. After it's gone, I give Umbridge one more hateful look before taking Luna's arm and walking back outside. When the door closes behind us, Luna lunges at me and hugs me tightly around the neck.

"Thank you, Ginny," she says against my hair. I don't move for a second and then I hug her back with a vengeance with my eyes slammed shut. I didn't realize how much I've needed a hug and I hold on to her for a few selfish moments before she pulls back. "You're the greatest friend ever. I swear I will pay you back... or try to, at least," she says as she blinks back tears.

"You're welcome," I tell her with a little smile. I'm glad I could do something good for someone. It makes me feel a bit better.

I start walking back towards the castle and Luna follows. "So, what did that letter say?" she asks as we walk. "The one you had Umbridge send out for you?"

I lick my lips. "It doesn't matter," I say with a shrug and she grabs my arm, making me look at her.

"I know things haven't been very good between us," she says with a head nod. "We've both been stupid," she admits. "But you can tell me things, Ginny. You've trusted me with so much already. Don't stop now."

I stare at her for a while before walking again. She follows. "I wrote..." I trail off uncomfortably and look at her from the corner of my eyes. "I said that if they didn't release my family from Azkaban... then I would kill myself."

"Oh, Gin," she says softly, like she felt bad for me. "You wouldn't actually... do that would you?"

"Of course not," I say, only half lying.

We don't speak to one another as we go into the castle and we head straight towards the Great Hall. I'm hungry and since Luna and I are speaking again, I don't think I'll have to eat in my room because I'll have a buffer between myself and Draco.

When we get to there, it's already crowded with students and I let my hood fall back down as I follow Luna to the very end of the table where no one is sitting. I take a seat, ignoring the heated gaze that I know is following me and I look at the empty plate for a few moments before piling food on top of it.

I start eating the mashed potatoes as I glance around the room. I find Neville sitting with the other re-educated student and I hold my spoon against my lips as I squint my eyes. Seamus is sitting beside him, staring a head of him with eyes as dead as a zombies and I feel my lips turning down as I stare at them.

What happened to them at Azkaban?

I focus on Neville again and I remember my lessons with Draco as I reach into my bag and take out my wand. I hold it on my lap and whisper a spell as I stare intently at him, trying to dive into his mind. All I see are doors, locked doors with numbers on them and I hear a boy's scream coming from one of the rooms. I try to open it, I really do, but I just can't make it budge, so I get on my knees to look through the key hole.

I can see Neville laying on a leather chair and there's a wizard in a white coat hovering above him with his wand above his head.

"Ginny."

I'm pulled out of Neville's thoughts and I blink a few times before glancing up at Daphne. She gives me an uncomfortable smile.

"Hey, how are you feeling?"

"I'm fine," I tell her as I put my spoon down. "How are you?"

"I'm fine," she says and she sends a little look to Luna. "I just noticed, you know, that you haven't shown up to any of our cheer practices."

"Oh," is all I say.

"Yeah... you know, you kind of have to go to the practices to be on the team."

"Hm," I say as I go back to my food.

I glance to my left once and my eyes catch Draco's. He's looking at me with his jaw set in a line and his eyes slightly narrowed.

I try to block my mind.

I don't want him spying on me.

"It's just that, it's not fair to everyone else who actually shows up," she says and I ignore her as I go back to playing with my food. "I mean, I know you and Draco are kind of fighting right now," she says in a whisper like she didn't want anyone to over hear and I glance up at her as she leans over the table. Her beautiful blond hair almost dipping into a bowl of spaghetti. "And its okay to take a few days off," she adds as she sends a sideways glance down the table, down to Draco. "But you have to at least show up sometimes."

"Why don't you just kick me off the team?" I say as I go back to my plate. I tap my fork against the steak. ""I hate that uniform anyways," I mutter under my breath and when I look up again, she looks hurt... like I had personally insulted her.

I feel bad, but I don't know how to fix it, so I keep messing with my food.

"Ginny," she says softly and I look at her again because her voice sounds so pleading. "You can talk to me, you know," she says, glancing at Luna like she was intruding on something important. Luna must notice because she fidgets uncomfortably by my side. "If you need anything... or... you know."

"Yeah," I say. "I know."

"Good," she says and then she nods her head. She reaches into her pink purse and she hands me an opened black envelope. "I was supposed to give this to you at cheer practice yesterday... but you never showed up."

"What is it?" I ask. I wipe my hand on my napkin before taking it from her.

"An invitation," she says as I take out the card and open it. "The Malfoy's are having a Halloween dinner next weekend," she says as I glance over the invite. "You're required to attend."

I flick a glance at Draco and quickly look away when his eyes find mine.

"Required?" I say harshly because I don't like that word.

She nods her head. "It's not just some fluff dinner," she says as she looks at her friends on the other end of the table. "A lot of important people are going to be there, and you have to go."

"Why do I have to go?" I ask with a brow raised. "Because of Draco?"

She shakes her head. "No... because of the... other one," she says uncomfortably and I swallow hard. I know who that is. "Some of us will be there," she says, trying to give me an encouraging smile. "So you won't be alone with all those old people."

"Who all is going to be there?"

"A lot of people," she says with a smile. "Mrs. Malfoy is going to take care of your hair and make up, of course," she says like it would go with out saying. "She's coming early to pick us all up."

"What if I don't want to go?" I say softly as I look down at the envelope.

"You have to go," she says gently, like she didn't want to say it. "Rookwood is going to make sure you attend."

At the mention of that fool's name, I shake my head and stuff the invitation back in the envelope.

"I guess I have to go then, right? Because I don't get a say in anything in my life."

She gives me a sad look before trying to smile. "I'll see you there, then," she says before nodding her head and walking towards her group of friends. I watch her go and when she takes a seat by Pansy, she shrugs her shoulders and starts talking to her with a serious tilt on her face.

A lot of important people will there, she had said. I bet _he_ will be there.

The Great Hall doors open and I look towards them with my brows raised in surprise. A few men in black robes enter with their wands drawn and very serious looks on their faces.

I know those men.

They pull the kids out for re-education and I feel my heart hammering as they check a long list that the woman is holding. All the students are watching them with wide eyes as they scan the room.

They pick out three people who fight the whole way.

A boy named Harmen Dodds who's father was a muggle gets dragged away. A girl with a black stringy hair who has a rather loud mouth when fighting in the halls get pulled next, kicking and screaming the whole way out... and then my breath stops when they grab Theodore Nott.

"What are they doing?" I hear Luna hiss as they pull him out of his seat. She stands up. "What are you doing!" she screams and I try to pull her down so she wont call attention to herself and make her the next target.

"Sit down," I whisper harshly. I had never seen them take students so publicly like this, but I guess there had to be a reason for it. A warning of some sort.

Theo was yelling at the men. Demanding that he be let go and wanting to speak to his father. I was holding Luna back as they dragged him towards the doors and then I saw him look down my table, at Draco, like he would be able to stop this.

"Please, no," I heard him say pleadingly and I did feel a little bit bad for him despite what a terrible person he was. "Please do something! I'm sorry!"

I glance down at Draco. He was watching his friend being carted off like it was nothing and he takes a drink from his glass before going back to his meal like the yelling didn't bother him in the least bit.

Zabini, on the other hand, smiles at Nott and waves to him before the doors are shut. An eerie silence falls over the hall after that display and I bite my lip, completely losing my appetite. Blaise looks down at me and raises his glass before taking a drink.

I look away quickly and feel sick.

"Why did they take him?" Luna sobs by my side and I try to pull her to me to comfort her, but she pushes me away. "You have no idea," she says as she stands up. "You have no idea how terrible my year has been!" she screams at me before running out of the hall.

My ears burn as everyone looks at me and I push my plate of food away.

She thinks she had a bad year.

I shake my head angrily and I clench my jaw shut. Now I'm alone.

I should have just ate in my room.

I look at Neville again just to do something instead of looking like a pathetic loser.

My family is in Azkaban... re-education students get sent there first. I put my chin in my hands and frown as I think it through. That letter I sent today, what if I don't get a response... or what if they just tell me no? I don't want to kill myself. I'm miserable, but I've never been_ that _miserable. I don't want to die... but I can't keep living life like this... or waiting for things to happen to me that are outside of my control. Will I ever see my family again? Umbridge said I was so close to being sent to Azkaban for re-education... and didn't Odette mention something along those lines? I blink a few times as I try to remember it. I was feeling terrible, so I can only recall bits and pieces of her conversation with Draco.

Draco.

I think of the way he controlled the fiend fyre curse in that odd room in his home.

Fiend fyre would get someone's attention.

And it would definitely get me sent to Azkaban... I might even be able to kill some people with it. Not that I want to... but if worse comes to worse... I hate thinking that way, but I can't help it.

I look at Neville once more as I think of my parents. My mother must be so distraught right now. They all must be... I want to see them again and right now there seems to be only one way.

I stand up quickly and head out of the Hall.

I practically run towards Draco's room and when I slide in front of his door, I say his password. I'm relieved that it never changed and when I get inside, I close the door quickly behind me. I put my bag down and go towards his bed. I get on my knees and crawl under to get his potions kit where his Prometheus project is hidden. If I can get the formula for that fiend fyre curse, then I can try to figure it out before that dinner.

I find it resting against the wall, by the head board, and I crawl even further under the bed to get to it. I snap my feet under the bed when I hear someone at the door and I hold my breath when it opens and someone, I'm assuming Draco, steps inside. I close my eyes as his shoes tap along the floor and when he's right by the bed, I crack open my eyes. I can see his polished shoes by the bedside table and I know he's taking off his watch and laying it there. That's what he always does when he first walks into his room.

I hold my breath because he doesn't move for a few seconds, and then his footsteps carry him away to the bathroom. When that door closes, I let out a breath and fidget with his potions kit to quickly take out his folder and notebook. I go to stuff it in my bag, but I stop when I remember I put my bag down by the bed.

Fuck.

The bathroom door opens and I clench my eyes shut again as Draco walks around the bed. He pauses another second and then I nearly scream when he grabs my ankle and pulls me out.

"What are you doing?" he asks as he hovers above me. He looks at the folders I have in my hand and then to my eyes. "Ginny, what the hell?"

What now?

I lick my lips and get up on my knees as he gives me a suspicious look. I put the folders and notebook on the floor and I bring my hands up to his belt buckle. I feel wrong doing this, but I have no other way to distract him. He always uses sex to distract me and it always works.

"Ginny," he says gently as he stops my hands with his own. He grabs me by the arms and pulls me to my feet. "What are you doing?" he whispers as he brings his hand up to my face.

"I don't know," I admit as I take his hand and kiss it.

He frowns.

"Gin," he says softly as I look up at him. He shakes his head sadly and then he runs his knuckles over my cheek. "I know you're upset," he says softly. "I wish I could say something to make things be okay again, but I know you're too angry to listen right now."

I don't say anything to that. I just stare at his throat as he cups my cheek.

"Why were you under my bed?" he asks, sending a look down at his folder.

I don't say anything and he nods his head, like he found out his answer anyways.

"You're sad," he points out and I nod my head because it was true. I was sad. I'm sad all the time. "I know you're upset with me," he says as he leans down so his face is closer to mine. "Let me make you feel better," he says and I look down. "That's the only thing I know how to do right, it seems," he says gently.

I look down at the folder again and then back to Draco. Distraction and addiction seem to be my motivating factors right now. I nod my head and lean up to press a kiss against his lips. I haven't touched him all week and it felt so good to be by him again. He was like a drug to me that I couldn't shake and I almost felt high when his hands found purchase on my waist. He smirks against my lips and thinks he's victorious. When I pull him down on top of me and he looks down at me with relief in his eyes, I feel like I was the one who won.

We spend the better part of the afternoon having sex.

He was being really gentle with me and at some point I nearly forgot why I was upset in the first place. There were no rough hair pulls or painful bites, and even though those things always turned me on when Draco and I were intimate, it was really nice just to be vanilla for a while. His words were soft and sweet and his kisses were feather light as he danced his lips across my body. I almost started crying, actually, as pathetic as that is.

He was saying the nicest things to me, telling me how beautiful I was and how much he loved me. He even used the word gorgeous once, which I thought was a nice touch and I smiled at him, a real smile, as our bodies worked against each other. I know Draco always prefers rougher sex and deep down, so do I, but this was nice. This was almost perfect. Instead of biting, he was kissing gently. Instead of gripping, he was caressing softly. It made me remember why I loved him so blindly.

Through the haze of lust and the high of climax I could actually believe that he loved me for just me. Nothing attached. No blood, no binding, nothing of importance... just me.

I was disappointed when we were finally finished, because that meant that reality had to set it.

And set in it did.

I stare up at the ceiling as Draco smiles lazily down at me with his head propped up with his hand. I close my eyes and turn my back on him, feeling guilty and bad and... kind of good... in an odd way. I shake it off as Draco folds himself around me, leaving open mouthed kisses on my shoulder after he moves my hair out of the way.

"Now I'm tired," he says in a deep voice and despite all I'm feeling, I smile.

He rests his head against mine and relaxes his body. He's getting comfortable, but I can't. I'm fighting with myself, wanting to turn over and kiss him, talk to him, _love _him... I want to believe he always has my best interest at heart and that he wanted me even before knowing anything about... everything that made him want to date me. I clench my jaw again and try to shake it off. I'm almost obsessed with Draco and his affection and I hesitate a moment before turning around to face him and placing a kiss on his lips.

I'm like an addict who always comes back to just one hit.

"I think I'm going to take a nap," he says with a smile as he closes his eyes.

I stare at his face, studying every tilt and line. Draco once told me that love was a weakness in an ambitious man. I wonder if it came down to it, would he choose me over those mysterious ambitions that he has? Is it even fair to ask that question?

"Are you that tired?" I ask softly.

"I haven't been sleeping much," he says as he brings a hand up to his face and he rubs his eye with the heel of his palm.

"Why?" I question as I bite my lower lip.

He cracks his eye open. "Really?" he says sarcastically as he looks down at me and I turn away uncomfortably. Right. Me. Or I'm selfish enough to assume that, anyways. "I don't sleep much anyways," he admits with a sigh as he props his head up again so he's hovering over me. "I have a lot on my mind."

I nod and pull the covers up to hide my naked chest.

"Speaking of minds," he says as he taps his fingers against my stomach. I glance at him. "You have been keeping yours particularly well protected."

"I've been practicing," I admit and he smiles at me.

"Clever girl," he says as he runs his finger tips up my bare arm. "Although, I have to admit that I miss being able to easily dip into your mind whenever I want. You have some of the naughtiest thoughts," he says with a sinful smirk as he cups my breast. I laugh a little and grab his hand, pulling it away, but holding his hand just because I like touching him and being close to him so much.

I hate how conflicted I am and I frown as lay my head on the pillow, staring at him some more like a creep. I look at his hair and bring my hand to tame some of the more unruly places as he smirks down at me with that smug look on his face. I give him a warm smile as I comb my fingers through his hair. It's a very light blond... like Luna...

I frown when I think of her.

"Why did they take Theo?" I ask and he lets that smug smirk drop. "At lunch... why did they take him for re-education?"

"There are only so many strikes a person can have against them," he says. I furrow my brows and I chew on my lip. I fiddle with the edge of the cover as I look at him.

"Luna was distraught," I tell him as I think of her panicked face before she left me in the hall. I should have followed her to see if she was okay. I realize that now, and I mentally scold myself for it... but I'm just so out of it lately. "She loves him, no matter how terrible he is," I say as I crinkle my nose.

"Funny how that works out," Draco replies seriously and I glance at him.

"She told me I couldn't even understand the terrible year she's having," I say with a snort as I bring my hand up to my mouth so I can chew on my nails. "She has no idea," I mutter, but Draco pulls my hand away from my mouth.

"To be fair," he says as he brings my hand up to rest against his neck. "I never made you turn into a guy when we fucked. I think that allows her to go off the deep end a few times this year," he says and I smile a little. I guess that's true. "Think of all the therapy she'll need," he says teasingly and I smile again before becoming more serious.

Obviously there is no love lost between me and Theodore Nott. I never liked him, but I don't know if anyone deserves that fate.

"What will they do to him?" I question softly.

"What they do to all of them," is all he says and then he glances at me.

"But why?" I press again. "I thought he was under the all powerful Malfoy umbrella of protection," I say and he smirks at the name before scooting even closer to me so his body is pressed right against mine. His breath makes my bangs flutter.

"He had his chance," he says coldly as he tucks his feet under mine. "And Zabini can hold a vendetta. It was only a matter of time."

I don't say anything to that.

"Daphne gave you the dinner invitation," he says as he drums his fingers against my skin.

I nod. "What is that about?" I question and he runs his nose along my cheek.

He's the one being overly affectionate now.

"My mother always has a Halloween dinner," he answers. "It's kind of what she's known for," he says with his brows raised.

"It's just like a Halloween party?"

"No one dresses up," he says. "But she always makes up these elaborate themes and she decorates the whole Manor. Witch Weekly photographs it every year," he says with an eye roll.

"Why am I invited?" I ask.

"Why wouldn't you be?" he asks and I frown.

"Because we're no longer 'together'," I say, nearly choking on the word and he cups my cheek.

"We're still together," he says. "I already explained that to you and being at the dinner will not be for my benefit. You're very popular right now," he says seriously and I frown.

"Will you be there?"

"I think that goes with out saying," he counters and I nod my head.

"Will you be courting other girls?" I question softly. The bitter sting of jealousy makes my head hurt.

"No," he says flatly, seriously, and I give him a grateful look. I don't know why it would bother me so much even if it wasn't real.

We lay in silence for a while before Draco speaks.

"Are you still angry with me?" he asks, studying my face with a critical eye.

I don't even know the answer to that. "I don't know," I say honestly as I start messing with the cover's edge again.

"I don't..." he trails off uncomfortably and I glance at him. Draco is never so uncomfortable. "I don't want you to think bad things about me," he admits and I tilt my head curiously as I turn on my side to face him more. "I've never cared what anyone thought of me," he says as he looks slightly over my right shoulder. "After our last fight I realized that there is one person's opinion that I care about," he says as he places his hand on my hip. "That person is you."

Is he just telling me what I want to hear? Is this his charm that he's using to keep me compliant. I hate that I don't know and I hate that I'm not brave enough to ask because I fear the answer.

"I don't want you to hate me," he says seriously with his eyes slightly narrowed.

"I don't hate you," I whisper and that was true.

He kisses me. I let him linger there and when he pulls back, he smiles a little. "Well, enough of that talk then," he says, changing the subject quickly as he rolls to his back, pulling me against his chest with the movement. "I have a funny story," he says and I lift my head up to give him an odd look because... well... it kind of seems out of character for him to say such a thing.

"Yeah?" I say softly. He nods his head and scratches chest.

"I saw Slughorn fall down the stairs this morning," he says and I furrow my brows.

His delivery could use some work.

"Was he okay?" I ask and he smiles a little as he looks at me.

"Yeah, he was fine. It was just funny because he had a stack of papers in his hand and Peeves threw something at him. When he fell, all of his papers went flying in the air." He makes a hand movement to show me how all the papers went flying around. "And he started cursing like I had never heard before. I didn't realize that old man had those words in his vocabulary." He smiles to himself and then he looks at me. "Isn't that funny?"

I nod my head and give him a smile. "Yes, that is funny," I tell him and he looks pleased.

It was kind of odd that he told me that story. He doesn't usually do little day to day talk like that, but I was kind of pleased that he did. It's like he was holding onto that story all day just to tell it to me... just because he thought I would like it. In a way, that's kind of sweet... I think.

A silence falls between up as he takes my hand and lines his palm up with mine. He studies the differences between them before bending his fingers down in a show of how much longer his hand is.

"I have something for you," he says and then he lets my hand drop as he slides out of the bed.

"What is it?" I ask as he pulls on his boxer briefs and walks towards his writing desk. I sit up and put the cover around me to protect my modesty.

"A gift," he says.

I tuck some hair behind my ear as he opens one of the drawers and I frown a bit as I look at the bracelet he gave me. I'm not much of a fan of his gifts, actually.

Once he finds whatever he's looking for, he walks towards the bed and I furrow my brows as I see a book in his hands.

"I know the rain ruined the nice one you had," he says as he takes a seat beside me and he hands me the leather bound notebook.

I remember that day... during the summer when he had beat that homeless man so viciously.

"I thought you would like a new one." I run my hand over the cover and swallow hard. "I saw you had that old spiral one the other day and you said something about not writing anymore..." he trails off and I open it to the first page where my name is printed in smooth calligraphy. "There are a lot of magical properties to this," he says as he taps his finger against the page.

"What kind?" I ask as I flip through the pages.

"It will edit your words and make suggestions as soon as you write a page," he says and I glance at him. "There's a dictionary... just write in the word on the first page and it will give you the definition and you can research things. It's like a little encyclopedia."

"Oh," I say as I blink a few times. "Thank you," I say gently. I lean over and kiss his cheek. "This was thoughtful."

"I'm glad you like it, babe," he says before leaning in to kiss me against the lips. He lingers there for a little bit before pulling back, giving me a boyish smile that I didn't really know he had.

I find it so hard to stay angry with him even though I have every reason to be upset, or suspicious. I just can't be strong when he smiles at me like that. It makes my heart warm over and I smile back, leaning in to give him another kiss.

"I know Rookwood is going to call on you for another donation in the coming weeks," he says and I furrow my brows as I pull back. "He'll probably make you sign a contract."

"What sort of contract?" I ask with a frown.

"I honestly don't know," he says. "I overheard it being talked about, but I think it will have to do with your future with the Dark Lord. A thing that will bind you from saying or doing certain things... I'm not sure but I wanted to give you a heads up so you weren't blind sided by it."

"Thanks," I reply seriously. Great, another thing for me to worry about.

He stretches himself on the bed, laying sideways as he looks at me with his silver eyes slightly narrowed. "Will you let me draw some of your blood today?" he asks.

Oh.

That dirty feeling is back.

"What exactly do you need it for?" I ask uncomfortably as I draw my knees up to my chest. I set the notebook on the bed side table and wrap my arms around my legs. Did he just give me that gift so I would do what he wanted?

My blood. It all goes back to that.

"I haven't been able to get the right formula," he says as he looks down at his covers. "But I know the ingredients. If your blood is what will sustain the Dark Lord's powers, then it only makes sense that it could be used to weaken them as well." I don't say anything to that, I just look at the window and take in the sky. It's gray, like Draco's eyes. "Do you mind?" he asks.

I shake my head and he smiles before getting off his bed again.

He gets his potions kit from under the bed and he ruffles through it until he finds a small case that has four syringes in it. I keep looking out the window as he sits beside me. I can see him preparing the needle and I feel my eyes watering a little. I guess it's because I just wanted to believe he wanted me instead of my blood.

"Do you not like needles?" he asks as he sits closer to me.

"Who does?" I say. I wipe my eyes with the back of my hand as he takes my left arm and pulls it towards him so he can press the needle to my vein.

"Do you cry every time Rookwood takes your blood?" he asks softly as he presses the needle and I inhale a sharp breath. God, I hope he knows what he's doing.

"No," I answer honestly and he stares at me for a second before going back to the needle.

He takes a whole vial of blood and as he's labeling and putting it away, I cradle my arm to my chest.

"Now," he says as after he puts everything away. He gets back on his side of the bed and he pulls me to him so I'm forced to lay down."Let's take a nap."

He closes his eyes and listen to his heart beat as he drifts to sleep. After half an hour of just laying against him, staring at the wall, I crawl out of his arms and I pick up his notebook and folder, stuffing them in my bag before hiking it over my shoulder. I look at him again as he lays taking an after shag nap and I sigh sadly to myself. I do love him, after everything, and I walk back towards the bed and lean over, placing a gentle kiss against his cheek.

I feel so guilty. I know I shouldn't just leave him like this after we had been so intimate but I know if stay until he wakes... I'll never walk away from him again.

I can't let myself be that weak. I look at my arm again where he took my blood and I feel my jaw tighten.

I can't make up my mind on the matter and I'm so frustrated with myself.

I leave the room quickly just in case he wakes up and convinces me to forgive him and stay in his bed.

I can't be weak right now.

I shake my head and walk towards the abandoned girl's bathroom on the second floor where Moaning Myrtle is hovering about the stalls. When she sees me walk in, she smiles and giggles as I walk towards the sinks. I need a large space where no one will find me and I'm afraid I might ruin the room of requirement with the spells I'll be practicing. The chamber seems to be the best option.

"Where's that handsome blond fellow?" Myrtle asks in her squeaky little voice as she glides down to me in all her ghostly annoyance. "The one who drilled you good last time."

I give her a disgusted look and go back to the sink as I try to remember how to open the chamber. I walk around it with my fingers tapping against my lip as I try to remember how I got in and out when I was eleven. I try to ignore the pain in my heart over Draco. I can't just let myself be stuck in situations. I can change them.

"What is sex like?" she asks as she follows me about the sink.

"What is death like?" I counter and she's silent for a few moments before answering.

"Cold," she answers and I flick a glance at her. "Very cold. Your turn," she says as I look at myself in the mirror.

"For what?" I question in distraction as I try to remember some parsletongue.

"For your answer. What is sex like? It looks like it hurts... but it a good way judging by all the noises you were making."

"You shouldn't have watched us," I admit with my cheeks blushing red.

"What else am I going to do?" she snaps at me with her pale hands on her hips. "I'm dead!"

Solid point.

"Do you like it when he bites you?" she asks as she steps even closer to me. It's cold and it makes me shiver. "It looks sexy," she says with a little girl's giggle and I give her another irritated look. "And it looks like you like it. _Oh, Draco,_" she moans with a hand on her chest and I narrow my eyes at her imitation of me. "_I love you. Please don't bite me._ Blah!"

"Just because you're dead doesn't mean you get to be a spying pervert," I tell her with clenched teeth and she giggles against her hand.

"I'm not a pervert! You're the one shagging your boyfriend in a girl's lavatory. I live here, you know!"

"Do you know how to open this?" I ask as I gesture to the sink, trying to get her away from talking about my sex life.

"Maybe I do," she says as she blink at me behind her horn rimmed glasses. "Maybe I don't."

"Do you?" I ask sharply as I turn to give her my full attention. "Or not?"

She doesn't say anything. She just smirks at me.

"Well?" I continue in a bitchy voice and she furrows her brows for a moment.

"How do you get all those good looking blokes to like you?" she asks as she floats away from me again to sit on top of one of the stall doors. She crosses her legs and puts her chin in her hand. "What do you do to get them to like you? Is it the sex? Are you easy? Olive Hornby was easy and she had lots of boyfriends."

I don't even know who that is and I narrow my eyes again.

"I'm not easy," I tell her sharply even thought what I just did with Draco made me feel pretty damn cheap.

"Are you wanting to go back down there to see Tom Riddle?" she asks as she blinks a few times with a frown. "You've been in here with him before, helping him do all those terrible things," she says in a tight little voice. "You know it's his fault..."

"That you're dead," I finish for her flatly. "I'm not going down there to see him."

She frowns and looks like she's about to cry as she hops off the stall and comes back towards me. "Tom Riddle was handsome too," she says as she looks me over. "He was terrible unfeeling boy, but very handsome and charming when he wanted to be, much like that blond boy who dragged you in here."

I know that all too well.

"If you help me open this I will tell you all you want to know about sex," I tell her as I look back at the sink.

"Everything?" she asks curiously and I glance at her. She's a ghost forever a teenager. I suppose sex would be a topic she would enjoy.

"Everything I can answer," I tell her seriously.

She smiles in excitement and looks back to sink. She whispers something in a hiss and the sink starts to move and change, revealing the entrance to the chamber. I smile and try to shake of the feeling of dread as I take timid steps forward. Mytrle follows me, but I don't even mind. I'm glad someone... or something... is with me just in case I have a panic attack or something. When I was little, just thinking of this place would send me into a fit. I close my eyes and inhale a sharp breath before walking even further in.

If I could have held a ghost's hand, I might have grabbed Myrtle's as I stared at the door that led to all of my childhood nightmares.

"Do you need me to open this door as well?" she asks with her tilted to the side. "A girl learns a thing or two after all these years, you know," she says with a laugh.

I just nod my head and I swallow hard as she hisses at the door until it opens.

The torches flame to life, revealing the inside of the large, frightening chamber that used to be home to one of the greatest beasts in history. I bite my lip as I take out my wand and I hold it in front of me like a fool as I take a few steps inside. It all looks the same to me. The large snake pillars still stand as proud and as dark as before and the statue of Salazar Slytherin is still as menacing as ever. The only thing that's changed is me. I'm not that frightened little girl enamored with a memory anymore.

I'm braver now. I'm stronger. Or, at least, that's what I like to think.

Myrtle floats around me like an orb of light as I walk further into the chamber, looking around me with worried eyes like Tom would hop out behind one of the pillars and try to kill me with his charm.

"Oh, would you look at!" Myrtle's excited voice makes me jump. I'm a bit on edge, honestly. She floats over behind one of the pillars and calls me over. "Come see this!" she calls and I look around me once more before following her.

I see a skeleton. A large skeleton that runs all along the wall. Vertebrae, ribs, a skull, and fangs... what's left of an old monster that Harry Potter killed. I guess that's another thing that's changed since I left.

"I'm glad that old beast is dead," she says as she spits, or looks like she spits, on the bones.

"Yeah," I say and then I blink a few times as I try to calm myself down. I can feel my breath starting to quicken, but I try to stamp that panic down. "You can go back to the bathroom now," I tell her, only half wanting her to leave. I take the bag off my shoulder so I can dig out the things I stole from Draco.

"Can't I stay?" she asks with her head tilted to the side. "You know, so we can talk about s-e-x?" she says, spelling it out like there was a child present. "You promised to answer my questions!"

"Fine," I say as I sit on my knees so I can open his notebook. "But you have to promise not to tell anyone what I'm doing."

"Oh, a secret," she says as she sits beside me with her chin in her hand. "How interesting. I can keep a good secret."

"Good," I tell her as I flick through the pages, trying to find something that resembles the fiend fyre curse.

"But you have to do something for me."

"Answer questions about sex, I know," I say, waving a dismissive hand and she frowns.

"No, not just that, you have to come visit me," she says and I send her a sideways glance. "Come talk to me sometimes... like a friend."

"A friend?" I question sarcastically.

She has got to be kidding me.

She nods her head, her dark hair falling over one shoulder. "I don't have any friends," she says with an exaggerated frown. "One time," she says and she blinks a few times like she was remembering it. "When I was alive, a group of girls from my house pretended to be my friends just to get information out of me about the boys I fancied," she says and I sit back to give her my full attention. "They told the whole school about the things I said," she says seriously. "They all laughed at me."

I hesitate a second before looking down. "I'm sorry," I tell her honestly. "That sounds terrible."

"It was terrible," she says and then she smiles at me. "I really hate girls," she says and I nod my head.

"Yeah, I know what you mean."

A silence falls between and then she coughs. I don't even know why. She's dead, after all.

"So, what do you think?" she asks and I bite my lower lip. "About that deal?"

"Yeah," I nod my head. "Yeah, I think I can do that," I tell her and she smiles.

I give her an uncomfortable smile as well.

I feel bad for Myrtle now more than I ever did before. It must be lonely to be a ghost and I realize now how alike her and I are.

It makes me sad.

I hate being sad.


	14. Chapter 14

"Oh! Holy crow! That was fantastic!" Myrtle screeches as I put the fiend fire curse out and exhale a slow breath with a smirk on my sweating face. "Do it again!"

"I think I need to take a break," I say honestly as I take a few steps back. It's so hot in the chamber right now because of that curse and I wipe my forehead off with the back of my hand. The fire has made me hot and I take off my sweater. "That was crazy, yeah?" I say with a huge grin on my face as I look at the scorch marks on the concrete.

"Oh, yeah!" she says as she dances around me. Her toes barely touching the ground as she flits.

I can't believe it actually worked this time. It's taken days for me to get that stupid thing to even sputter out some fire, but now it comes out as a full blast. It's not fully mastered yet. I know I have to keep practicing, but it just feels really good to get this far with it.

I feel almost high.

"How wonderful!" Myrtle screeches as I throw my sweater down on the ground and drop to my knees by Draco's folders.

I need to start copying it down in my own notebook. I know he's going to want them back and I can't keep on hiding from him. He will find me sooner or later.

"So, back to the subject," she says as she sits across from me. I pull out a pen and start copying down the words. "When you give a blow job, why do guys like it so much? I mean, can't they just stand in front of a fan and call it a day?" she asks and I glance at her.

"What are you talking about?"

"Blow jobs," she says and I raise a brow. "You know," she holds her hand out like she was holding a boy's _thing_ and she starts blowing on it like it was a whistle. "Why would that feel good to them?"

"You don't actually blow," I tell her with a frown on my face as I start writing down all of the words I see in Draco's folder, coping it word for word in the notebook he had given me. "You just kind of... suck... like a sucker or something," I finish uncomfortably as I scratch my neck.

"Then why is it called that?" Myrtle asks as she hovers beside me, giving me the chills.

"I don't know," I tell her with a shrug.

"Why don't they call it a suck job if there is no blowing involved!"

She sounds legitimately angry about it and I find a little amusement in the situation as I smirk to myself. "I don't know the answer to that," I tell her honestly.

"Hmf," she says as she sits back and crosses her arms. "Do you do that with that blond fellow?" she asks with her brow raised.

"His name is Draco," I tell her as I write a few more things down with a scrape of my pen.

"Draco," she says the name like she was tasting it. I don't know why she's acting like she didn't know his name. She talks about him all the damn time. "Do you give Draco a suckjob? And don't lie!" She yells as she points a finger at me. "You promised to tell me the truth!"

My cheeks flush. "Sometimes," I say honestly. There's no point in lying to a ghost, really.

"Isn't that gross? I mean..." I glance at her as she makes a disgusted face. "I mean it's their.. thing," she says like it was something foul and she makes a motion to her own private spot. I cringe and look away.

"I don't mind it," I tell her, feeling dirty talking about it out loud. "It doesn't really bother me and I like that I can make him feel good," I admit in a little whisper. I guess it is easy to admit things to her because she's dead and of no real importance in the world now.

That was a mean thought. I shake it off and mentally scold myself for it.

"But you don't get anything out of it," she says as I try to scribble down every french word and every symbol in Draco's papers.

"He does it back," I tell her in frustration.

"He gives you a suckjob?"

"Well, obviously not," I tell her with a sigh. "I don't have a penis."

She giggles and I glare at her as she hides her laugh behind her hand. "You said penis."

"That's what it's called," I say flatly and she grins widely.

"It just sounds funny," she says with another giggle and I shake my head. "What does he do then?" she asks and I feel really uncomfortable as I sit back on my knees.

"He does..." I trail off and frown, trying to figure out the right word to use that won't make me feel dirty. "He does it back," I finish lamely and she cocks her head to the side. "I mean, think of a blow job and what you do to a guy... and then imagine it with a girl instead," I say and she crinkles her nose. "It's like that."

"Does it feel good?"

"Yeah... in a weird way," I say honestly and she raises her brows. "It feels kind of odd at first... but it feels really good in the end."

"When you have sex," she says as she scoots so close that she's touching me. It feels like ice. "Does it ever go into the wrong hole?"

Ew.

"What?" I ask sharply and she blinks.

"They're right beside each other," she points out. "What if it accidentally goes into the wrong hole? Has that ever happened?"

"No," I say in disgust. "I would kill him if that ever 'accidentally' happened." I say, using air quotes.

"Why?"

"Because that would hurt."

"Some people think it's sexy," she says and I give her a look.

"Who thinks it's sexy?"

She shrugs her shoulders. "I've heard lots of girls talking about that kind of sex over the years," she says as she puts her chin in her hand. "Keeps them from getting pregnant."

Charming.

"Do you think Draco is sexy?" she asks and it makes me think of Draco with his shirt off.

I pull on the collar of my undershirt a bit, feeling hot all over again.

"Yes, he's very sexy," I admit as I think of the way he looks when he's on top of me with his cheeks flushed and his hair a mess and that little smirk on his face.

I shift uncomfortably and try to shake the thought away.

"I think he's sexy too," she says with a girlish giggle. "I wouldn't mind if he was my boyfriend. You are so lucky and he looks like he's so good at shagging. Is he good at shagging?"

"Yes," I answer in a small and embarrassed voice.

"Thought so," she says with a nod of her head. "I wish I could have sex. I would so have sex with Draco all the time."

I snort at the thought.

"Right," I say as I turn away again so I can finish copying.

I'm not sure if I should remind her that he's my boyfriend, but she can't actually go after him, so I let it slide. At the rate I'm going it's going to take me years to copy all of this. I know Draco will notice I took them and I know I'll have to give them back at some point. I'm trying to jot down as much as I can so I can learn at my own pace because this curse might take a lot longer to master than I originally, and foolishly, thought.

"What are you doing?" she asks, leaning over my shoulder to see the notebooks.

I've been down here for hours, but she just now noticed I was doing something other than answering her gross sex questions.

"Making a copy of this."

"Why are you doing that?"

"Because."

"Why are you doing it that way?"

"What way?" I ask sharply because she's annoying.

"That long way," she says. "Don't you have your wand with you?"

I glance at her and hold it up. Obviously I have my wand. She just saw me use it.

"Then why don't you just use magic to copy it?"

"I don't know how to do that," I admit and she grins smugly.

"I do. The copy doesn't last that long, but it's better than taking all this time doing it." She floats in front of me and I tilt my head back to see her properly. "You just swish your wand this way," she says making a motion with her hand to show me. "And then you press the page you want to copy and then you swish again," she moves her hand and her black Hogwarts robe moves with her. "And then you touch the empty page you want it copied on and then you say how long you want it copied for."

"Can't I say forever?" I ask with a frown and she shakes her head.

"I said it only lasts for a couple weeks."

"Oh," I say and then I watch her as she shows me the rest of the spell. "Thanks," I say as I copy the first page successfully. "Why didn't I know this?"

"I think it's because teachers didn't want students to cheat on their tests or something," she says thoughtfully. "That's why."

"Well, it's awesome. Thanks for telling me," I tell her and she smiles a large smile that shows every crooked tooth.

I just might get this done without getting carpel tunnel.

"See," she says smugly as she hovers around me. "I know lots of valuable things."

"Good for you," I say, concentrating on copying the pages so I can pack up and go over them in my room.

"I have another question."

"Go for it," I say as I bite my lip and turn the page. I pause for a moment as all the french words start moving around and jumbling and twisting about the page.

"Are you going to have Draco's baby?"

"What?" I snap as I look up from the jumbling words so I can glower at her. "Why would you ask something like that?"

She shrugs her ghostly shoulders. "I hear things."

"Who said anything like that?" I ask sharply and she laughs.

"Oh, you look so angry right now. Your face is turning the color of a beet!"

I stand up. "Who said something like that?" I demand to know as I remember Blaise saying something very similar to that in Draco's dorm room.

"You are being awfully defensive," she counters with a bushy eyebrow raised and I clench my fist around my wand.

"Was it a girl or boy?"

"Ah, twenty questions!" she says as she sits down on the ground with her legs crossed and her chin in her hands.

Did I mention she was annoying?

"I love this game! Alright, it was a girl."

Girl. "Was it Pansy?" I ask and she shakes her head. "Daphne?"

"I don't know who that is," she says and I frown.

"She's blonde," I say as I touch my own hair. "She kind of looks like a barbie doll."

"Oh! Her," she says and I raise my brows. "No, it wasn't her."

"Was it someone in the grade above me?" I ask tiredly and she shakes her head. "Will you just tell me?" I yell with a stomp of my foot and she laughs again.

"That's not how you play."

"I don't want to play this stupid game, just tell me who it was!"

"Don't yell at me, missy!" she hisses as she stands up, hovering two feet above the ground.

"Tell me what you know!" I yell back in frustration. "I have more important things to do than hang out with a dead girl all day!"

She looks surprised and hurt by that and then she disappears.

She's just gone and I look around me, calling out her name a few times before realizing that she's not hiding close by. She actually left me in the chamber... alone.

I shake off the chilling feeling in my heart as I get back on my knees to finish copying Draco's papers. When I look back at my notebook, the words are no longer jumping around the page... but I can read it all now. I look down in amazement and I put some hair behind my ears as my eyes scan the copied page. It's all in English now.

The notebook translated it for me.

Thank you, Draco.

I hear a noise and I jump, looking around me once more in the darkness of the chamber. It sounded like something metallic fell off in the distance. I hold perfectly still and I hold my breath as I glance around, finally stopping on the statue of Salazar Slytherin. Nothing happens, so I go back to copying the papers... and then I hear it again and I look up and swallow hard.

I stare right at the spot where Tom Riddle tried to kill me when I was eleven and then I am suddenly all too aware of being alone.

I hear it again and I quickly gather up all of my things and stuff them in my bag.

No, thank you, big scary room.

I practically run out of the chamber and when I reach the bathroom, Myrtle is sitting on top of one of the sinks, crying her ghostly eyes out.

I ignore her and run past, heading straight to my room so I can get under my covers and feel safe.

When I finally get there, the dorm room is empty except for one person.

Pansy is sitting on my bed.

I look around awkwardly before falling back on her.

"Hi," I say slowly, uncomfortably as I walk further into the room. "What are you doing?" I ask carefully.

She raises her brows as she looks me over and then she crosses her long legs.

"Where have you been?" she asks with her head titled. "I've been waiting for you."

"Just around," I say as I shrug, not wanting to give too much away because I know she'd side with Draco over me any day of the week. "Why were you waiting for me?"

"Come," she says as she pats my bed. "Sit."

I look around again before nodding my head and walking towards her. I take a seat on my bed and watch her from the corner of my eyes as she takes a out a white box from behind her. "What is this about?" I ask nervously, figuring Draco probably sent her.

"Your outfit," she says as she unties the blue ribbon that held it together. "For Mrs. Malfoy's Halloween dinner."

She takes off the lid. Inside the box, I see the top of a fancy looking dress.

"It's not a normal Halloween party, where people dress up as stupid things," she says as she stands up and pulls the dress out to show it to me. It's a long dress that falls all the way to the floor. The bodice is made from a firmer material and it has a pattern printed on it that looks like some sort of crystallized ivy. It's connected to two little sleeves are are transparent and soft looking like a butterfly's wing.

"It's and old fashioned wizard formal," she says.

The dress looks like something from the Victorian area with a long layered skirt that looks like satin and silk. It's all a golden cream color in varying hues.

"Women are held to a strict standard of course. The men can do whatever the hell they want as long as they wear the formal wizard attire," she says with an eyeroll and then she looks at me. "What do you think?"

"About what?" I ask stupidly and she narrows her eyes.

"About the dress?" she says as she shakes it at me.

"It's pretty," I say as I stand up and touch the skirt. "It's a little much," I admit and she laughs.

"Please, you haven't seen mine yet," she says like I was silly. She's not scolding me, or glaring, or doing anything mean... I'm kind of thrown off guard by it. "This is tame. Mrs. Malfoy is keeping you sweet and simple." She pushes it at me. "Try it on then. I have to see if it needs any changes."

"Right now?" I say as I send a look to my bag. I still need to copy some of those pages before Draco hunts me down.

"Yes, right now," she says.

I hesitate a moment before going to the bathroom and trying it on to please her so she'll leave me alone. I realize the top part is a corset and I make a face at is as I unlace the back so I can step into the garment with ease. The material seems expensive and there are pearls tracing some of the stitching along the top. It's really pretty and when I stare at myself in the mirror I can't get over how sugary I look. It's like I'm an iced dessert waiting to be eaten alive.

"Come on out," Pansy says and I sigh loudly before opening the door. "I like it," she says, giving me a surveying look as she pulls me into the room. She stands me in front of another full bodied mirror and throws my hair over one shoulder.

I stare at my reflection as she stands behind and starts tying up the corset ribbons.

"What is the theme?" I ask as I put my hand on my stomach and suck in because she's tying it so tight.

"No one knows until they're actually there. It's always a good time, though," she says thoughtfully as she pulls particularly tight and I wince as I arch my back. "Or that's what I was always told. This is the first year I'll be allowed to go."

"Why?"

"Because I was introduced into society this year," she says seriously. "I can do a lot of things I couldn't do before."

"I've never been introduced," I say softly as I fiddle with a ribbon on the dress and try not to pass out. I think she's crushing my rib cage, all my organs feel like they're pushing together.

"Well, you are a special case." She eyes me for a few moments and she pulls on the ribbons once more. I exhale slowly. "Draco has been in a very dark mood lately," she says as she watches me with narrowed eyes when she's finished tying off the corset. "Do you have any idea why?"

"No," I whisper, lying through my teeth and feeling guilty as hell. "No, I don't." I take a step forward and put my hand on the mirror. "This is really tight," I admit as I try to find a comfortable way to stand.

She goes back to my bed again and pull out another white box. I watch her with wary eyes as she walks back carrying two high heeled slippers the same golden cream color. She puts them down and I step into them with out having to be told. They place me up higher and make the dress lay perfectly right above the ground.

She reaches a hand out and touches a strand of hair. "You're really beautiful, Ginny," she says seriously. "You look like a doll in this dress."

"Thanks," I say uncomfortably.

"Draco will like it," she says. I look away and roll my eyes."Ginny," she says harshly and when I look at her, she's giving me the usual Pansy glare that I am so used to getting. "When you piss Draco off, it has a trickle down effect on all of us."

"I don't know what you're talking about," I say uncomfortably as I put my hand on my stomach again, trying to loosen the corset in vain. She walks in front of me, standing far too close for comfort and

blocking my view of the mirror.

With the heels on, I'm actually taller than she is.

"Of course you don't," she says sarcastically. "You have no idea what you do to him. You just go along your merry way with total disregard to everyone's feelings."

"That's not true," I say with a frown as I take in a short breath.

"You act like you're better than everyone else just because your family was a part of the Order of the Phoenix and your old boyfriend is supposed to be the savior of the wizarding world. You have no idea what pain is, or what sacrifice is, but you act like the world is ending when one thing happens that you don't like. I have never met a more selfish person."

I step away from her before she kills me with her sharp tongue and I level her with a glare. "You have no idea how I feel," I tell her and she sneers. "I'm not selfish. My whole family is locked up, I have no friends I can trust, and my boyfriend is a liar! How does being upset about any of that make me selfish!"

"Please," she says, batting away my rant like it was nothing. "Everyone is so obsessed with Ginny Weasley right now. If you think Draco is just going to let you carry on the way you have, then you are in for a very harsh wake up call."

"Draco doesn't own me," I say stiffly, feeling utterly ridiculous to be having this fight in this terribly formal dress.

"Keep thinking that," she says sarcastically and I shake my head. "You're just like Draco, you know," she snaps. "You want everyone to do what you want and when you don't get your way, you get upset and make everyone pay for it."

"I'm not like Draco," I reply sharply and she shakes her head.

"Yes, you are," she says as she eyes me. "If you want something, if someone was mean to you, if you want to go somewhere, the first person you ask is Draco, but you don't appreciate it at all. You're just like him. Maybe that's why everyone likes you so damn much."

"Are you being so sharp with me because of Blaise?" I ask boldly and her glare becomes almost deadly.

"What does Zabini have anything to do with this?"

"I don't like Blaise. I don't want him, so you can stop being so hateful to me."

"You think this is about Blaise?" she hisses at me and I stand my ground with a hand on my hip. "I don't care who he wants to fuck, Ginny. This is so much bigger than petty little things like that. All you have to do is sit there and look pretty, but you're making it so fucking hard on everybody. Why can't you just do as your told? You don't even have to do anything hard! You just have to do what Draco tells you and he barely ever gives you any orders. If you could walk in someone else's shoes for just one second I think you would stop being so freaking difficult."

"I..." I start but she cuts me off before I can even finish.

"_You_ have nothing to worry about," she says as she puts a hand on her slender hip. "_You_ are going to be okay. Draco is going to make sure everything goes perfectly for _you _because he cares and he wants to make you happy. No one cares if I'm happy or not," she says hatefully. "No body cares how this is all going to turn out for me."

"I..."

"Apologize to Draco," she cuts me off again. "Tell him you're sorry and offer him some amazing make up sex because I am tired of being so stressed out all the time. Do whatever you have to do to make him happy again because if you keep on messing with him like you have been you are going to be sorry," she says, inches away from my face before she backs up. Her eyes skip down my body before settling on my eyes again. "The dress looks good. Don't get it dirty."

Then she leaves the room, and I just stare after her like an idiot.

I realize a moment too late that I can't get the dress off by myself and after twenty or so minutes of trying to untie it by myself like an idiot, Luna finally walks into the room.

Thank God.

"Luna," I say in relief as she walks straight towards her bed. She puts her bag down and doesn't even look at me as I approach her. "Can you help me?" I ask as I turn around and hold up my hair to show her the laces. "I can't get this damn thing off by myself."

She doesn't say anything but when I feel her fingers untying the back of the dress I sigh in relief.

"Thanks," I whisper as the bodice loosens, giving me more space to breath. "I thought I might pass out."

"You told Draco, didn't you?" she says flatly and I furrow my brows.

"Told Draco what?" I ask as the bodice gives and loosens with each lace coming undone.

"About Theo. About the secret I told you," she says and once the corset is completely loosened I turn around to face her. "That's why he was sent for re-education. I saw the way he looked at Malfoy before they pulled him out," she says with her eyes watering. "You told him after I specifically told you not to."

I shake my head. "I didn't tell Draco," I say honestly and that wasn't a lie.

"Then how did he know?" she asks. "Why would they all be so angry with him that they would let that happen?"

"I..." I knew it would be best to lie, but I didn't want to. Not to Luna. Not when I didn't have any one else. "I did tell Zabini," I say and her eyes inflame with anger as I put my hand out to explain myself. "I thought he should know. Someone was using his likeness. That's not good and what Theo did to you was wrong..." That was my lame excuse but she didn't buy it.

"I'm going to bed now," she says as she climbs into her bed. "Night," she says flatly before tugging all of the bed curtains tightly closed.

I frown and then go to my own bed. I suspect she had a lot more to say to be about the matter but because of all the money I gave up to get her father out of Azkaban, I think she was trying to limit herself.

I sigh loudly as I think about how much I hate my life and then I kick off the stupid shoes, letting them land somewhere under my bed.

After a long pause, I take off the dress and carefully place it back in the box before barricading myself inside of my bed as well. I take out my wand and place it behind my ear as I pull out my notebook and start reading the translated words on the page.

It all starts with a list.

A list of ingredients to make a potion I've never heard of before...

Even in English it's all complicated and the words are... long and hard to get through. It's like reading an educational text on something difficult and I feel my eyes drooping shut in sleepiness before I even reach the fourth page. I set it to the side after a while, promising myself to work through it during the light of day and I lay back against my pillows with a tired sigh.

I wake to Ivy singing a rather loud and annoying rap song as she curls her hair in the mirror. I rub my eyes and sit up, glaring at her back before sending a shy look to Luna's bed. It's already empty and made and I frown again before getting up to get ready for the day.

"Weasley," I look up at Astoria as she dives under her bed. "Have you seen my shoes?The ones with the buckle?"

I shake my head and yawn against my hand as I pull out that stupid uniform to wear.

"What are you going to be for Halloween?" I hear Ivy ask, but it's not directed at me so I don't even bother to look up as I shimmy into a pair of black tights.

"I don't know, I was thinking something funny," Astoria says. "Like a person from history or something, but like a sexy zombie."

Sexy Zombie.

"You could be a Zombie Wendy Wendella," Ivy says.

I put on my skirt and I tuck in my dress shirt before rubbing sleep from my eyes.

"Who's that?" Astoria asks with pursed lips and I roll my eyes as I slink into my jacket.

"She was like a famous witch or something a hundred or so years ago. I think she invented the imperius curse."

"Oh," Astoria makes a thinking face. "I was thinking of something more recent... something everyone would know," she adds as I put on the stupid blue arm band that brands me a pureblood.

Ivy ponders that for a moment while I do my hair and make up quickly. "You could be a Zombie Professor Dumbledore," she says with a cruel laugh and I snap my head to hers as I slip on my shoes. "That would be funny, you could have a really long white beard."

"I'm not sure if I could make that sexy," Astoria replies as my ears burn. "But that would be funny."

"That's not funny at all," I tell them before leaving the room.

"I guess it's too soon for some people," I hear Ivy say after me and they both cackle as I storm down the stairs.

I hate them.

The first bell rings as I leave the common room and the halls are crowded with students hurrying to their first class. I keep my head down and try to just blend in to keep out of trouble and to avoid a certain someone. I look up once when I turn a corner and, when I see Draco and a few of his guy friends walking down the opposite way, I feel my heart drop. He's eating an apple and smirking at something Zabini is saying to him. Eventually, his eyes find mind and I panic like a coward. I tuck my head down and watch my feet as I make a sharp right turn down a different corridor that is going_ away_ from the class I was headed towards.

This hall is just as crowded and I have to push through all the first and second years as I try to figure out a round about way to get to my class so I can avoid Draco.

I feel like a giant among all these younger students and I smile uncomfortably at one of them when they step on my toe.

I think I have a back way figured out when I feel a hand gripping my arm from behind. The little first years back away from me as I turn around and glance up a Draco with dread pooling in my stomach. I knew this confrontation was going to come at some point. I just really wish it wasn't so soon. I haven't had the proper time to come up with something to say and I gasp when he _yanks_ me and starts dragging me.

"Let me go," I say as I try to pull his hand off my upper arm.

"You don't get to tell me what to do," he says flatly and I try to elbow him.

"Let go."

"Stop talking," he says lightly.

The younger students part in front of us like the red sea, looking at me and Draco with wide eyed wonder like we were mythological beings traipsing down the hallway and putting on a show.

"Where are you taking me?" I snap at him. A little girl with blond hair wasn't watching were she was walking and she slammed right into Draco's strong chest

All of her papers went scattering to the ground as she bounded back and when she looked up at us with frightened eyes, I felt really bad.

"Are you-"

I was going to ask if the poor thing was okay, but Draco cut me off.

"Move," is all he says and the girl nods her head feverishly before gathering all of her papers and running off like a bat out of hell.

I glare at Draco as he starts pulling me again. "You don't have to be so mean to everyone," I tell him harshly and he spares me an icy glance before looking forward again.

"You have yet to see me be mean," he says flatly and I swallow hard.

I don't ask anymore questions and I even toy with the idea of kicking him in the leg and making a run for it, but when he pulls me down an empty hallway, I hear footsteps behind us. I look over my shoulder and see Zabini and Crabbe following us with narrowed eyes and when Blaise sees me looking at him, he winks. I sigh in defeat, knowing I wouldn't make it that far if I decided to escape anyways.

"Watch the hall," I hear Draco say to his gang members as he pulls back a large tapestry of a medieval maiden and he ushers me into the deep alcove it hides.

He pushes me against the stone wall and my breath quickens when he lifts his wand. A few torches on the walls flame to life, illuminating his face in a golden glow that makes him look like a devil.

A very angry devil that is very upset with me at the moment, to be exact.

"Draco..." I trail off as he pockets his wand and places his hand by my head, caging me against the wall.

"Did you really think I wouldn't notice?"

"Notice what?" I ask and then I jump when he smacks his hand against the wall beside me, making it shake and vibrate in my ears.

I feel my hands shake them and I try to hid it. I try not to look weak or worried.

"That was a real bitch move you pulled on me," he says hatefully and I swallow hard. Draco has never looked at me so coldly. Was this supposed to be my harsh wake up call? "Fucking me just to get to my notes," he says and I look at his throat. "Look at me," he hisses. "If you are going to do sneaky things like this then you better be able to look me in the fucking eyes."

My eyes water. I can't believe he's talking to me this way... but I knew he could be cruel. I knew he was hateful for as long as I've known him. I just couldn't believe he was talking this way to _me. _

"I have to get to class," I tell him as I try to slide away from him, but he grabs my arm and pulls me back.

"You're going to be late, I'm afraid," he says as he grips so tight I'm sure there's going to be a bruise.

I inhale a shaky breath and blink back tears as I look away from him.

"Are you crying?" he hisses and I shake my head. "Why are you crying? How did you expect me to react?" he snaps and I flinch. "We had sex and then you just left like it wasn't a big deal. You stole from me," he says and his fist clenches against the wall again. "If they ended up in the wrong hands then I could be dead. This isn't some goddamn game, Ginny. This is life and death and don't you dare fucking cry and make me look like the bad guy."

"I..." My voice fails me so I stop talking.

He's scaring me.

He stares at me for a long time before hitting his hand against the wall again, making me shrink away from him and cross my arms over my chest protectively. There's a long pause before he speaks again, his voice coming out in a harsh whisper.

"You act like I don't have feelings. Now you're crying and I look like the fucking villain when you are just as to blame as I am. You mess with my head all of the damn time but you don't see me fucking crying about it."

"Stop cussing at me," I say as I blink back more annoying tears.

He clenches his jaw and pinches the bridge of his nose with his free hand. "Give them back," he says tightly with his eyes shut. I don't move. I can't. He opens his eyes and lets his hand drop, leveling me with a deadly glare. It's a look that makes me feel terrible. "Give them back. Now."

"I..." I can't say anything else and it's frustrating.

"Now!" he barks sharply and my hands are shaking uncontrollably as I angle my bag so I can open it.

I fumble with the zipper and try to grab his things as quickly as possible so he'll stop looking at me so coldly, so he'll let me leave and stop scaring me. I'm so nervous, though, and my hands aren't working like I want them to. I end up fumbling all of my belongings and dropping a few things on the ground in my haste to get his folder. They clatter against the stone floor and the sound echos off the wall because Draco is being so stoically quiet all of a sudden.

"I-I was going to give it back," I tell him as I try to still my hands so I can actually grab his folders. "I wasn't going to keep them."

I stop moving when I feel his hand over mine, stilling them from shaking. His hand is really warm and it doesn't really go with his cold disposition. I snap my eyes to his as he looks me over and then he pushes my hands away. I let them fall to my sides like a limp rag doll as he grabs my bag and steps back. I watch with glassy eyes as he sorts through my bag and when he finds his folder and notebook, he takes them out and puts them in his school satchel.

My bag gets dropped on the floor and I cross my arms again, trying to make myself as small as possible.

"Why did you take it?" he asks as he closes his satchel, snapping it shut and locking it with a twist of a golden latch.

I don't say anything. I can't.

He sighs and then looks at me once everything is settled.

"Did you show anyone?" he asks sharply.

"Of course not," I whisper as I look at the ground. "I wouldn't do that to you."

"Did you read any of it?" he says with a brow raised.

"It's in french," I point out as I tuck hair behind my ear nervously. "I can't read french."

"You're a witch, Ginny, not an idiot," he says and my cheeks burn again. "You could find a way to translate it." He adds like he didn't believe me.

"I only read the first few pages," I admit. I have the rest copied down in my notebook, but he doesn't need to know that. "It was just a list of ingredients and directions on how to brew a potion of some sort. That's as far as I got."

"Do you know what that potion was?" he asks curiously.

I shake my head. I was going to look it up today.

"I will give you some very critical advice," he says as he looks into my eyes. "I already told you that Rookwood will be calling you to his office within the next couple of days. He's going to make you sign a contract of some sort to keep you under control. It's become well known among his followers what will happen to you once you graduate. It's basically a public relations move for them to bar you from embarrassing him, but I don't know what they'll throw in there. Try not to sign it if you can hold off," he adds softly. "Read the fine print. The Dark Lord isn't known for his respectable business practices."

"Okay," I say as I process his words carefully.

"And if he offers you some tea, do not take it," he says seriously and I frown.

"Why?" I question. It's not like I would drink Rookwood's tea, but still. "Would he put something in it?"

"Probably not," he says as he looks down at me. "But I know someone who has been. If you look up that potion you've been reading the directions to, I'm sure you'll figure out it's purpose. So, in short. Do not drink the damn tea."

"I won't," I mutter and I look down at his chest because I don't want to look into his eyes any longer.

If I look at him too long I always come up with a reason to forgive him, just once.

I shake my head angrily at how weak I am and I lick my lips. Why hasn't he stepped back yet? "Class," is all I say as I try to push away from the wall, but his quick hands come out and he pushes me back again.

When I glance up again, he's staring at me. His silver eyes are reflecting the flame of the torches. "I try very hard to understand you," he says as he looks over my face, running along my lips and then my cheeks. "You change your mind all the damn time. I never know how you're going feel about me on any given day. It's exhausting and I can't keep up."

I can't either.

"I don't know what to do with myself half the time," I admit in a small voice as I curl my body a bit more. "I never know what to believe."

He sighs loudly and then he takes a step closer to me, propping his hand up against the wall beside my head again. This time it's not in a threatening manner and I let my body relax a bit more as I stare at his shoes. I can feel him staring at me, so I look away and tuck some hair behind my ear just willing him to go away and leave me alone so I can have a good cry about it.

He puts his fingers under my chin and attempts to tilt my chin up.

"How do you feel about me today?" he asks when I muster up the courage to look at him. He studies my face with his silver eyes darkened. "Hm?" he asks with a tilted head as he stares at my lips. "Do you love me today?"

"I don't know," I admit and he smiles a little bit.

"Of course you don't," he says as he lets his hand drop and my cheeks heat in embarrassment when he puts his hand back against the wall. "You never know anything."

"Are we done here?" I ask as I look at the tapestry. "I need to get to class."

"You really piss me off, do you know that?" he hisses with his brows raised. "Sometimes I feel like you are so frustrating just to mess with me, just to piss off," he says as he takes a step closer to me, pressing his hips into mine. "Sometimes I think you're just playing with me. Trying to manipulate me with your tears and your sad 'I'm so innocent' eyes. Trying to make me feel bad and get off track. Is that what you're doing?" he asks angrily pushing into me a bit more and glaring. "Are you doing this to me on purpose?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about," I say as I try to move away him, but he blocks me and holds me against the wall, against him. "Why don't you just read my mind and find out?" I hiss at him. "You have no boundaries anyways."

"I've respected your boundaries," he says coldly. "But if you think otherwise, why do I even bother?"

"Just let me go to class," I tell him heatedly. "You have your precious folders, I've given you my blood, I haven't told any of your secrets. You don't have to keep pretending anymore. Now leave me alone."

"No," he says seriously as he tilts his head to catch my eyes again. "I'm not going to do what you want anymore."

"You never do what I want," I tell him hatefully. "Case in point," I tell him as I push at his chest, but he refuses to back up.

He grabs my wrists and forces me to look at him. "It doesn't matter what you want," he bites out slowly and it hurts to hear him say it, but I glare anyways. "Kiss me," he says as he looks at my lips again.

I scoff. "That's not happening."

He narrows his eyes and licks his lower lip."Kiss me," he says as he yanks my wrists so they're pinned at my sides.

I'm giving him a free pass to leave me alone. If he never wanted me in the first place and he was only dating me for my blood I will willingly give it to him if he'll just stop lying to me. It's pathetic to love someone who's only pretending to love you.

"No," I say as I shake my head and try to turn away from him again. He grabs my chin and I use my newly free hand to push his away.

He ignores it, the brute.

"Ginny," he says as he looks deeply into my eyes as he holds me in place. "I _order_ you to kiss me," he says. "As your head of house," he adds as his eyes darken.

Something over takes me and just like in Rookwood's office I hand over all my free will. I instantly tilt my chin up and place a kiss against his lips because I can't do any thing else. I go to pull back, but he grabs the back of my head and holds me firmly against him. He pushes his tongue against mine and like any good mindless slave, I respond with vigor, bringing my hands up to rest against his chest. My body reacts and I turn onto sex mode.

When he pushes his knee in between my legs, I welcome the friction and press against it as I arch my chest into him, letting my hands wrap around his neck. He slips his arms around my waist to pull me closer as I practically dry hump his leg. I even moan a little as embarrassing as that is and when he pulls back, his smile is cruel. The demand shakes off of me and I level him with a horrible glare as I wipe off my mouth with the back of my hand. I push his leg away.

I can't believe he made me do that.

"Remember that," he says seriously before pushing off the wall. "I could do a whole lot more than make you snog me."

He leaves me and I don't move for a few moments, trying to catch my breath. Once I know he's gone and I'm safe, I feel unbelievable anger at myself and at Draco. I get down on my knees and start picking up all the papers I had dropped in my haste to get to his folders. I stuff them in my bag with out much care and I hike the bag over my shoulder.

I'm fifteen minutes late when I make it to my Dark Arts class and Carrow gives me a hateful look as I slide into my seat.

"Why are you late?" the troll of a woman asks as I take out my text.

"I overslept," I lie as I push my bangs out of my eyes.

"You overslept?" she says sharply and my cheeks burn as every girl in the class looks at me. "Well, because you don't feel the need to be on time, perhaps you can help me demonstrate our next lesson."

I furrow my brows and slouch my shoulders a bit.

"Come to the front of the class," she says, motioning to me with her hand.

Damn.

I send a nervous look around me before grabbing my wand and walking slowly towards the front of the class with the all the sixth year pureblooded girls watching me. "Now, as I was saying before I was interrupted," she says, sending me an irritated look. "You will all master the cruciatus curse before the end of this year."

What?

"No one here will go into their last year not knowing how to preform the three unforgivables. As you know, once you graduate, all boys will be required to join the army and commit to three years of service before being released. You lot," she says motioning around the room. "Will be allowed to join the army, of course, but it's not a requirement. In fact, Our Great Lord would prefer to keep the young ladies of the country at home to carry out the war effort on our soil. The reason you need to know such curses is because we will be left when the men leave the country to broaden our empire. The women at home will have to know how to defend our livelihoods as well. Just in case."

Astoria Greengrass raises her hand and Carrow calls on her. "So... my question is..." she says, trailing off as she twirls a curl around her finger. She looks so much like Daphne sometimes it's scary. "If I don't learn how to do it properly... Will I still graduate?"

Carrow narrows her eyes. "Why do you think you will not be able to do it properly?"

"Well," Astoria licks her lips and Ivy sends her a look. "Those are such brute curses, aren't they?" she says and I raise an eye brow. "I just don't feel like, as a lady," she says, putting her hand on her chest. "That I would enjoy doing such curses and I don't think I would ever actually use them."

"What if a rebel Order of Phoenix member broke into your house at night?" My ears burn at the mention of the Order and the disgusted look half the girls make pisses me off. "They wouldn't be afraid to use those curses on you."

"If someone broke into my house... then obviously my father would take care of it."

"What if your father wasn't home?"

"Then my boyfriend," she counters with her arms crossed and Carrow narrows her eyes.

"What if your boyfriend wasn't home?" she says slowly, like she was talking to an idiot.

I look at Astoria as she twirls her hair and realize that she is.

"Obviously my bodyguard would handle it or my house-elf," she looks thoughtful for a moment. "Dipsy is a bit scrappy, actually. Yes, the house-elf would most definitely handle it."

Carrow makes a frustrated noise and shakes her head. "It's part of the curriculum. You must learn it," she says before turning back to the class. "Anyways, back to the lesson. Weasley, stand over there," she says, pointing to a random spot in front of her. "I am going to demonstrate how a proper curse should be delivered. I want you all to watch me closely. Pay particular attention to the way my wrist flicks up at the end."

"Wait," I say quickly when she lifts her wand. "You can't do that curse on me," I say sharply and the old bitch raises an eyebrow.

"This is a lesson for being late to my class. I'm afraid I can put this curse on you. It's clearly stated in the new student handbook that you all have. This is not Dumbledore's school anymore," she says and I narrow my eyes. "We're making real witches and wizards here."

"No," I say because there is no way in Hades I'm allowing this to happen.

My morning has been bad enough as it is.

"Just stand there," she ignores me and when she throws the curse at me I quickly lift my own wand.

I don't even know what spell I shouted, but it made the spell she was throwing at me bounce off and hit her right in the chest.

She instantly falls to the ground and starts screaming and crying and begging and I put my hand over my mouth as the other people in the class all turn to stare at me. I grab my bag and run out of the room, still hearing her screams as I race down the hall. I don't know where I'm running to. I just keep running, trying not to think about how much trouble I'm going to be in. God.

I close my eyes and shake my head as I stop and lean against one of the large stone walls. I couldn't just let her use that curse on me, though, right? Will I ever be allowed back in that class? What will happen now?

I bring my hand up to my head and cover my eyes. Why can't anything ever be easy?

I stand there until some one finds me and I get summoned to Snape's office. I take slow steps, like I was walking towards my death and when I get there, Snape is sitting behind his desk with a grim look on his face and Carrow is standing beside him with a bag of ice on her neck.

She glares daggers when I step in and I can feel all the color drain from my face.

"There, there she is!" she says, jabbing a pudgy finger at me as I take a seat. "I want her punished and then sent to Azkaban for re-education."

"Let's not be dramatic," Snape says slowly as he looks me over. "How did Miss Weasley come to curse you again?"

"I was having a demonstration for my class," she says through clenched teeth as I wring my hands together. "She lifted her wand and did it back."

"The Crucio curse?" he asks in a slow drawl and Carrow nods her head. "The same curse you were going to demonstrate?" She nods her head again. "The same curse your students need to know by the end of the year?"

"Yes, yes," she says impatiently and he narrows his eyes.

"Well, it seems as though Miss Weasley has mastered such a curse, wouldn't you say?" he says as he looks back at me with a raised brow. "I can hardly send her away for getting ahead on her education. Lunch detention with Professor Sprout I think will be fair," he says and then he lifts up a folder to look at. "You may go," he dismisses me with a shoo of his hand and I take my bag and practically run out.

I can hear Carrow yelling as I scurry down the hallway.

I wait in my dorm room until the bell rings and the make it to my next class on time and with out much problem. Everyone asks me what happened of course, and I give them the simple version in a soft voice in fear of Carrow popping out and torturing me until I go mad. In fact, I was looking over my shoulder the rest of day because of it and when I served my lunch detention with Sprout I was a nervous mess in her greenhouse.

She was a mess too, to be honest. She kept on mumbling to herself about evil and staying in for the children as she cut off leaves from purple potted plants that lined her window sill. I think she might be going mad.

The rest of the day went on without drama and when dinner time came, I decided to eat in the Great Hall so I wasn't alone and at that madwoman's mercy.

When I get there, I stare around me before looking at Dean Thomas. He's sitting by himself at the half-blood table and I send a look to Draco and his friends before walking towards him with purposeful steps.

He looks surprised when I sit down and even more surprised when I start loading my plate with food.

"Ginny?" he whispers, sending a little look over to the pureblooded table. "What are you doing?"

"Eating dinner," I tell him and then I give him a tight lipped smile. "You don't mind, do you?"

"No, ah, no I guess not," he says as he goes back to his corn. I send a look to the teacher table and quickly look away when I see Carrow staring at me with her eyes narrowed into slits. "It's just that..."

"What?" I snap and he shakes his head.

"Never mind," he mutters. He doesn't say anything for a while and then he puts down his spoon. "It's just, I don't think it's a good idea for you to be sitting by me."

"Why not?" I ask, my feelings hurt. Everyone hates me right now. I don't think I could take it if Dean did as well.

"Because," he says and then his eyes flick towards the pureblooded table. "It's just that I don't want any trouble, alright?"

"What do you mean?" I ask stupidly. "I won't cause you any trouble, Dean. I just don't want to sit by myself. Everyone is so angry with me right now..."

"It's not me, Ginny," he says with a long sigh. "It's just..." he looks Draco's group again and I frown. "I just don't want to have to deal with the drama you bring."

Ouch.

"We're friends," I say softly, hurt by his words as I try to understand them. "I don't like the drama I bring either," I admit.

"We're not friends. According to your boyfriend you don't have guy friends," he says flatly, looking at Draco.

"What do you mean?" I say that a lot.

"That's what he told me anyways, that day that we were talking in the courtyard. He cornered me later that night with his whole little gang. He let me know in not so many words that I wasn't allowed to talk to you like that again. I tried to tell him that you and I were just friends, but he didn't believe it and that's when he told me you're not allowed to be 'just friends' with blokes."

"That is ridiculous," I hiss and he nods his head.

"I know it is, but I didn't argue with it. He seemed really serious about it and I just don't have it in me to fight. I have my own problems," he says as he stands up. He sends a look to the end of the table, where the re-educated students are slowly eating their dinner, staring out into space, seeing and hearing nothing. Seamus, Dean's best friend is among them and I feel guilty all over again. "I'm sorry, Gin. But I can't sit with you right now."

He walks off and I'm left alone... again... like always.

Some Gryffindor he is.

I look at the pureblood table and catch Draco looking right at me. He takes a drink from his glass and raises an eyebrow.

I look away.

Some Gryffindor I am.

I stab at my food with my head in my hand and I exhale slowly. I'm so sick of being alone. Someone sits across from me, but I don't even bother to look up because I know exactly who it is. I could recognize that fragrance anywhere because Daphne always sprays it on in the mornings and then another quick spray in the afternoon. It smells like something sugary and sweet.

It smells like Daphne.

"Hey there, Gin," she says as she starts loading up her golden plate and I glance at her without bothering to smile. "How are you today?"

I shrug. "How are you?" I ask because I've become rather good at boring conversation.

"I heard that you cursed Professor Carrow this morning," she says and I slightly narrow my eyes as I kill a pea with my fork. "With an unforgiviable."

"She was going to curse me with it," I defend myself as I scratch my cheek and sit up straight.

"I know, I heard you didn't even get in trouble for it," she says with a perfect grin and I shake my head.

"Snape said that I had properly demonstrated the curse, so I had learned something... I don't know," I shake my head and shrug again.

"That's good," she says and I look at her as she takes a sip from her glass. "So, are you going to come to practice tomorrow?" she says softly, like she thought I would bite her head off if she questioned me a certain way. "We all miss you, you know."

"I'm not even good at it, Daphne," I tell her with a sigh. "I only did it because I wanted to leave the castle and do... I don't know," I shrug because I don't even remember why I thought it was a good idea in the first place. My plans have changed. "I'm probably the worst cheer-leader there is."

"That's not true," she says. "I think you do very well."

I laugh. "You're obviously lying."

She laughs too because she knows how bad I am. "Well, at least you look really good in the uniform," she says with twinkling eyes and I smile a little at her. "Lovegood is coming to the practices," she says as she nods to my friend. She's sitting by Romilda Vane who is talking her ear off. When did they become friends? I frown. "I would really love for you to come. You know you're my best friend on the team," she says, like she actually missed my company and I give her a look. "All the other girls are so tiresome."

"Are you going to give me a speech about going back to Draco too?" I ask with a sigh as I remember my last talk to with Pansy. "Should I just hop in to bed with him to make your life easier too?" I ask sharply and she furrows her perfect eyebrows together.

"I can't tell you to do anything. I know Draco can be intense," she says with a sigh. "I don't envy you for having his attention but I don't pity you either. Draco can be amazing."

"In what way?" I ask and she gives me a look.

"Like you don't know. Ask him to do anything for you and he'll find a way to make it happen."

"That's not true."

"Well, what do you want?" she asks as she blinks her big eyes at me and I look back down at my plate.

"I want my family out of Azkaban."

"Have you told him that?" she says curiously and I give her a look.

"I think it should go with out saying."

"But did you tell him?" she asks and I put my fork down.

"No, but he knows that I miss my family. He knows how sad I am and Draco has no control over that anyways."

"What else do you want?"

I look at the re-educated students. "I wanted him to help Neville but he refused."

"Did he say why?"

I look away as I try to remember. "He said that they would track Neville and kill him if he helped him escape or something like that."

"That seems legit."

I shrug. I never know with him.

"I think you're being too hard on him... but you know, I know how he can be," she looks at me with a shrug of her shoulder. "Let's not talk about it. Let's talk about something else. Are you excited for Halloween? Pansy showed me your dress. I think you're going to look like a princess." She puts her bag on the table and starts opening it. "Would you like to see my scrap book?" she asks, talking a mile a minute. I can't get a word in edgewise. "I just started it for this year. All my photos are done."

"Okay," I say slowly and she pulls out a very pink and bedazzled square book from her bag. I raise my eyes brows when I see it and she smiles wide when she hands it to me.

"I've been making them since I was a third year," she says as I open up the first page. There's a picture of Daphne and her prize winning smile with some sort of crown on her head.

"I won Miss Cherry Field at the beginning of the summer," she says as she taps the picture with her perfectly polished fingernail. "Before we started hanging out," she explains as I turn the page. There are beautiful glossy photos set on purple paper with little sayings and journals of the events written beside them in smooth hand writing.

There's a photo of Daphne dancing in some kind of sparkling green number. She twirls and spins across the stage as a spot lot shines on her. There's another of her in a yellow dress talking into a microphone. Her hair is teased and curled and her make-up looks professionally done as she winks at the invisible audience and laughs at something off to the left. The last photo on the page is her being crowed Miss Cheery Field. She doesn't look very surprised, to be honest, and the other girls in the background look positively livid.

"It's very intense, you understand," she says as I take a closer look at the page. "You aren't there to make friends."

"So, you didn't get Miss Congeniality, I take it?" I make a joke and she laughs.

"That's not even a category," she answers and I laugh a little before turning the page.

The next few pages have a lot of random photos of people at parties. There's one of Daphne and Pansy taking shots. There's one of Blaise blowing smoke at the camera in a very crowded room. There's another one of Draco and another guy sitting down on two chairs, having a serious discussion over a chess game and whiskey.

I find a picture of me being very drunk looking, dancing with Pansy at a house party. I think that might have been at Draco's summer house at Yellow Springs. Before he pulled me away and scolded me for dancing, of course.

"I look like a sweating mess in this photo," I say with my nose crinkling and she snorts as she leans across the table to see.

"You were pretty drunk," she says and I nod my head before turning the page again.

A million photo's from her 'coming out' dominated a good chunk of the book. A section was dedicated to her finding a dress and getting ready with all of her sisters around her, trying to help. A lot of close ups of her hair and make up are here and I look at them with mild interest as I sort through. More of her and her father and her plastic looking mother at Mafloy Manor. These photos are beautiful and I suspect they're professionally done.

"I thought you looked really pretty," I tell her as I tap a picture of her coming down the Malfoy stairs with feathers in her hair. "I loved your dress that night."

"Thank you," she says. "You looked pretty too. I don't think I got a photo of you that night," she says with a frown and I shrug it off.

Then I get into the back to school cheer-leading photos. I'm in more of these. There's a picture of me and Daphne, me and Luna, me and... Draco.

I stare at that one for a few moments longer than the others.

We look like a couple from some teenage book about school love. That stupid cheer-leading uniform is really short and my hair is perfectly curled thanks to Daphne's mad skills. I'm looking up at him so adoringly... it's almost sick actually, the way I'm looking at him, but he's so handsome. My eyes scan Draco's form as he smirks down at me. I really like the way he looks in that Quidditch uniform.

We actually look good together.

We look like we fit.

"I think you and Draco would make beautiful babies," she says and my eyes snap to hers.

"What?" I say flatly and she smiles.

"Not now of course, but look," she says as she points to the photo of me and Draco. "Can't you just see how cute those kids would be?"

I look down at the picture again and then I glance up to the pureblood table where Draco is eating his dinner. With a heavy sigh I have to admit that yes, those kids would be adorable.

Not that I'm in any rush.

* * *

Rookwood called me to his office three days later.

"You know the drill. Take a seat, Miss Weasley," Rookwood says. I step inside of his office and go to take my usual seat as I look him over. Rookwood looks odd. He looks sick, actually. His eyes are drooping and blood shot and he looks really thin, unhealthily thin. "I would have called you in sooner, but I've been feeling under the weather lately," he says and I nod.

He looks like hell, to be honest.

"You will be attending the Malfoy Halloween Dinner, yes?" he says as he sits down and opens up a drawer from his desk. He coughs and it sounds like it came from some where deep in his chest.

"Do I have a choice?" I ask with a brow raised as I take my seat and he gives me an unpleasant smile. His skin looks like chalk right and I make a face at it.

"No," he says. "I can't say that you do, but it is always nice to be polite about it, is it not?" he says as I slump back in the seat and cross my arms. "Now, you will be required to wear this," he says as he walks around the desk and he shows me a silver ring. I make a face as he hands to it me. "All the students leaving the castle will be wearing a similar device. We'll be able to track you if you desire to... take a field trip off grounds, shall we say," he says. "They will make sure you're wearing it before you leave the castle tomorrow night. Do not be caught with out or the consequences will be deadly."

"Understood," I say with a head nod as he takes a seat behind his desk.

He sorts through some papers. "Now, as you are aware, I called you in much earlier than scheduled."

"Yes," I say as I hold the silver ring up to the light to get a better look. It's just a regular silver band... nothing fancy or pretty about it.

"There is something I need for you to sign," he says as he sets a large stack of papers on top of the desk.

My eyes snap to his. A contract. Like Draco had said.

"What is it?" I ask carefully as I lean forward and flip through some of the pages. The print is impossibly small and it's written in symbols instead of English. I don't understand any of it and there are so many pages... it's like an inch thick.

"Nothing you need to concern yourself about," he says flips the stack to the last page. He hands me a quill dipped in blue ink. "Just sign on the line."

"I'm not signing without knowing what it is," I tell him flatly and he narrows his eyes.

"You do recall what the Dark Lord said last time he was in this chamber, don't you?" he says sharply as he rolls his wand against the desk. "I am allowed to use curses to get you to do as you are told. I am highly skilled in the imperius curse, I'll have you know."

"You can't use any curse to get me to sign a contract like this," I tell him. I heard that once in class and I'm hoping that I was listening correctly during the lecture. "Any binding magical contract can't be obtained under the influence of any curse. It would make the contract void, wouldn't it?" I ask uncertainly and he eyes inflame.

I guess I heard right. Thank god I paid attention that day.

"Sign the damn paper," he hisses. "You do not want me to involve the Dark Lord again."

"Tell me what these symbols mean," I tell him as I tap the contract again, feeling braver the longer he stalls. That means there's something pulling him back from cursing me.

He narrows his eyes as he looks at me and then he takes out a letter from a drawer in his desk and lays it on top of the contract. "Did you write this lovely piece of poetry?" he asks and I reach a hand out to see what he's talking about.

It's the letter I had Umbrdige send out.

"Bold statement," he says and I slouch in my seat again. Rookwood wouldn't help me. "One that the Dark Lord would not appreciate, I'm afraid," he says with a frown. "If you wanted to die, I am sure He would be more than happy to oblige you. I know he needs your blood, but he could take away your mind and soul, make you nothing but a vegetable. You'd be like sleeping beauty forever locked away in a castle. Hearing nothing, seeing nothing, feeling nothing... but still of use. You are only as valuable as your blood and you have no leverage to level demands at anyone," he says as my heart beats painfully. "You should consider yourself lucky you have been allowed to live as you have. He has been more than generous and your insolence will not stand any longer."

I clench my jaw.

"Now, sign the on the line, please," he says seriously, handing me the quill once more. I don't take it. "You want the Dark Lord to release your family or you'll kill yourself? How about this for an ultimatum, if you don't do as you are told, then your whole family dies." My heart stops and I look at him with wide eyes. This was a move I didn't expect, although I know I should have seen it coming when dealing with death eaters. "I am well aware that you have a great deal of family members. We could keep this going for a very long time if you chose to be so disobedient and disrespectful in the future. It would serve you well to keep that in mind."

I take the quill with shaking hands. Just thinking of one of my family members being hurt or killed scares me to death and I pull the contract towards me, trying hard to read the symbols even though I know I'll never know what they mean.

"Sir," I hear an elf squeak and I jump when it appears beside Rookwood with a tea cup and saucer in it's boney hands. "Your tea," it says as it lays it on the desk top.

"Set it down," Rookwood says dismissively to the trembling elf and I stare at the little creature. When it pops away, Rookwood pulls the tea towards him and picks up a spoon to stir it. "They never mix it just right, those elves," he says with a head shake as he works the spoon around. "Would you like some?" he asks, offering his cup to me. "I could have them bring more if you'd like."

Don't drink the tea.

"No," I shake my head and cross my legs uncomfortably. "Thanks, though."

I don't move and his dark eyes look into mine as he raises the cup to his lips. "Sign, Miss Weasley. I have important matters I must get back to."

I feel like I'm going to be signing my whole life over in this contract and I bite my lip hard as I put the quill to the paper.

Rookwood coughs.

I look up in surprise as he lifts his hand to his mouth. "Carry on," he say in a rough voice between coughs and hacks.

"Are you alright?" I ask because he's wheezing a bit now.

He nods his head and pulls a handkerchief from his pocket. He places it to his mouth and starts hacking as he leans forward. I stand up and take a step closer to the desk as I furrow my brows. Is he choking on tea?

"Do you need me to get someone?" I ask, unsure of what to do as I shift my eyes around the office, looking for something to help, but knowing I wouldn't even know what to do if I did find something.

When he pulls back the handkerchief, I can see the splashes of red on the fabric and when he looks at me, his lips are nearly as pale as his skin. He coughs again and I take a step back. His shoulders start rising and falling and his hands are shaking as he reaches a hand out to his wand laying on the desk. His hand falls limp on the wooden top and it sends his wand rolling off the side and clattering to the ground.

I cover my mouth and take another step back as he tries to stand up. He's looking at me pleadingly like I would be able to help and he reaches his left hand out towards me. I take another step back and when he opens his mouth to say something, blood dribbles out and rolls down his chin.

Oh, my.

He's too weak to stand and he slumps back in his chair. After another moment of coughing and wheezing, he lays his head forehead down on the desk and his whole body relaxes in an odd heap. I lick my lips nervously and I look around again. I don't know why. It's not like any one else is here. I look back at Rookwood nervously.

"Hello?" I say stupidly as I take a cautious step towards him. He's not moving now and it doesn't even look like he's breathing.

I feel a chill go down my spine at what that implies and I try to be brave as I walk around the desk so I'm standing by his side.

"Mr. Rookwood?" I say as I poke his shoulder. He doesn't move, his head just lolls to the side before falling back into place. "Should I call someone?" I whisper knowing full well that's what I should do but being too in shock to do it.

If he's dead... will people blame me? Would they hurt my family as punishment? This all Draco's doing!

"Rookwood?" I say a little more firmly as I push his shoulder. His body slumps out of the chair and falls to the ground with a thump. I cover my mouth when I see his face. His eyes are open and he's staring unblinkingly forward. "Hell no," I whisper as I back up. I run into the bookshelf and jump when a book slams to the ground beside me. He doesn't move, of course.

Yes... he is most definitely dead.

Now that I know that for sure, I have to get as far away from his as possible. I have no desire to be around a dead body and I head for the door, but I stop in my tracks as I look back at that thick contract still laying open on the desk. I scan the room again before running towards it and picking it up. I hold it against my chest as I run out of the room and the first person I see walking down the hallways is Snape in all his black and moody glory.

"Excuse me, Headmaster," I say as I run towards him.

He raises his hateful eyebrows, but doesn't stop walking, practically forcing me to chance him.

"Wait," I tell him as his robe swishes behind him. "I think Rookwood might be dead."

He stops and I nearly run into his back. "What did you say, Miss Weasley?" he asks, slightly turning his head so he can see me.

"I was in Rookwood's office and he drank some tea... then he started coughing and then he just kind of fell over and I think he may be dead."

He eyes me for a moment before tightening his eyes. "You are sure of this?" he says as he takes out his wand and heads straight for Rookwood's office.

"Uh, yeah," I say because how could someone not be sure of something like that?

I follow him the whole way and when he opens the door and steps inside, I hang out in the hallway and start biting my nails. I watch him walk towards the man lying on the ground and check his pulse. Then he does a few spells with his wand that make his brows furrow in an annoyance.

"You said he drank tea before this happened?" he says and I nod my head when his sharp eyes look towards mine. He picks up the tea cup and sniffs it before setting it down. "Did he have the tea already or was it brought to him?" he asks.

"Brought to him from a house-elf," I call from the door way because there is no way in hell I'm going back in there.

"What elf?" he asks sternly as he walks around the desk towards the fire place. "Do you recall?"

I shake my head. "I don't know... It had blue eyes though. I thought that was strange," I say and he nods his head as picks up some floo powder. "So, he is dead, right?" I say and he gives me a look like I was stupid.

"I believe Mr. Rookwood has been poisoned. I must make a call. I want you to wait in the hallway and do not move until you are told to do so."

"Okay," I say weakly as I hold the contract a little tighter to my chest.

I wait there like I was told and when Snape comes back out he's flanked by two Aurors. I have to give a statement and two interviews.

I don't get released until well after six.

Seeing his dead body get lifted and taken from the castle makes me think of the other dead body I had seen. When Delsia was killed at Folk Hills, her throat slit and her life drained from her.

I feel sick.

I spend the rest of the day in bed, under the covers, staring at the wall. I don't think I can cry for a person like Izador Rookwood, but death just makes me feel terrible and I can't stop thinking about Delsia. Does her family know what happened to her? What did they do with her body after they dragged her from that room?

These are demented and sad thoughts, but I can't help but think them.

I watch as the sun sets outside of my barred window and the moon rises in the sky. My other roommates make their way into the room later in the night and I hear them talking and chattering amongst themselves, mostly gossiping about Rookwood and how he died and when they notice me laying there with their back to me, a silence falls over them.

Then they start talking and giggling about something else and I close my eyes, pulling a pillow against my chest and cradling it to me like I was a child. I clench my eyes shut when someone turns on the radio and I sigh loudly, hoping sleep will take me soon so I don't have to think.

After a while they all stop talking again and I curl a bit around the pillow when I hear Draco's voice.

"Turn off the music," his deep voice says and I try to pretend to be asleep as someone clicks off the radio, leaving the room in a deadly silence. "Leave," he says next and I tense as I hear everyone's footsteps carry them from the room.

I don't want to deal with him right now. I don't want to fight with him. When he closes the door, I curl a bit more and refuse to open my eyes as his footsteps carry him closer to my bed.

The mattress sinks down when he takes a seat beside me and I can hear him untying his shoes and laying them on the wooden floor. I still don't acknowledge him and when I hear the metal of his watch hit my night stand I swallow hard.

"Are you okay?" he asks and his voice sounds really deep right now. Really deep and really scratchy but I don't bother to answer him.

He unbuckles his belt and I can feel the bed wrestle around as he takes it off, pulling it through each belt loop.

"I didn't want it to happen in front of you," he says and I hear the belt join his watch on the night stand. "Bad timing, I guess," he says softly then he turns off the lights.

In the darkness, I open my eyes and stare at the moon again. It's higher in the sky now.

"I know you're awake," he says flatly as he lays down beside me. The mattress sinks more and I straighten out my legs so I don't roll towards him. "You're just not answering me," he says as he folds himself behind me, putting his arm over my middle and pulling me against him. "You're being annoying," he adds a kiss under my ear and I shy away from him.

"Draco," I start so he knows I'm serious. "I don't want to start a fight with you. I don't want to talk about anything. I just want to be alone right now."

"I've let you have plenty of alone time," he says against my ear, his breath warm against my skin.

"Please, just go to your room," I tell him seriously, softly so I don't provoke his temper.

"You act like you're the only one that's allowed to be angry," he says sharply as his hand tightens are my forearm. "I don't know what your problem is. What do you want me to do?"

"I don't want you to do anything," I tell him.

"Then why are you treating me this way?"

I pause a moment and then I look at him over my shoulder as he sits up and turns on the light. "What way?" I ask sharply and he glares.

"Avoiding me, ignoring me, doing things that you know will make me mad."

I clench my jaw and shake my head. I didn't want to fight. I am so tired of fighting. "You are not the most important person in the world," I tell him sharply as I cross my arms across my chest, over the covers. "I just saw someone die, thank you. And unfortunately, it hasn't been the first time this year. Sorry if not everything is about you," I tell him and he glares.

He doesn't say anything and I clench my jaw.

"Why did you start dating me in the first place? You're using me, Draco. You got what you wanted. I'll give you my blood if you'll just leave me alone," I say as all my thoughts boil to the top.

He doesn't say anything for a few moments and then he sneers. "Is that why you're so pissed off at me?"

"I don't want to have to pretend my way through such a messed up relationship, Draco," I tell him as I sit up as well, holding my arms behind me to support my upper body. "I really believed you loved me."

"Why do you think I don't now?" he asks and I roll my eyes.

"You're using me to get what you want," I tell him. "You charmed me into falling in love with you to keep me around and you only started dating me because the Dark Lord needed my blood. You didn't want me," I tell him as I put my hand on my chest. "Do you realize how bad that realization hurts?"

"I like that you think you can tell me how I feel and what my motivations are," he says coldly. "Instead of just fucking asking me."

"You'll just lie to me," I tell him and he narrows his eyes.

"How am I supposed to do anything with that?" he snaps as he grabs a section of his hair and pulls until it sticks up. "I can't even tell you anything because you have your own preconceived notions about it."

"I'm confused all the time," I admit to him. "I'm scared all the time. I don't know what's going on and I constantly feel stupid. My best friend right now is a ghost. A perverted ghost who is crap at conversation but she's the only thing in this stupid castle who I can relate to right now."

I inhale deeply as he studies my face.

"Every time you do something or say something, I have to analyze it and decide what it means, or what it means for me and then there's this underlying concern..." I trail off because I don't know how to say this and my throat feels tight. "See, just you sitting here," I tell him as I sit up and motion towards him. "I don't know why you're here. I can't help but think that you're going to try to make me forgive you just so... I don't know," I say as I let my hands fall to the cover. "I don't know what your plans are with me and everyone is always talking in riddles. I can't stand it anymore."

I stop talking because I can't get my point across the way I want it to and I lay back against the pillows in a weak heap and throw my arm over my eyes.

"I'm so tired," I admit in a whisper, hoping he'll just leave.

Then I feel his hand on my hand, slowly running his fingers up my bare arm. "I told you a while ago that I could have had you any time I wanted," he says and I uncover my eyes to look at him as he runs his hand towards my shoulder. "I could claim you if I wanted."

"You also said you weren't going to until you found out the about my blood."

"I didn't say that," he says as he lays beside me again. "I hate your brother," he says as he puts his hand under my shirt, running his warn fingers across my stomach as he hovers over me. "I hated him so much," he says with a sneer. "I could have killed him I hated him so much."

"I get it," I tell him flatly because Ron is still my brother after all.

"I was blinded by my hatred," he says as he runs his nose along my cheek. "I never saw you," he says. "You were just a young little redheaded blur in my peripheral vision but when the Dark Lord started speaking your name, I starting thinking about you," he says seriously. "And it wasn't because of your blood or anything like that. I didn't know what he wanted at first, it just sparked my interest that your name was being whispered among the deadly death eaters that had been around for ages. When Zabini told me there was a new pretty girl working at Folk Hills, I went to see," he says and I glance at him as a smile tugs the corner of his lips as he looks down at me. "I must have been blind. I didn't realize how good looking you were," he says as he runs his fingers over my nose.

"When I finally realized who you were I was elated," he says. "I knew you were mine already, I just had to make you realize it too and everything was just falling into place so well. You have been perfect for me," he says as he kisses my cheek. "I'm attracted to you, I want you all the time, and you have everything that I need to do what I want to do. I love you, Ginny. Life usually doesn't work out this way."

Right.

"I love you," he repeats as he looks into my eyes. "I never say those words and I'm saying them to you. I don't know what else to say or do to make you believe that. The fact that I'm even here right now, talking to you, should make a point." I don't know what to say... I don't know anything. I turn on my side and he folds around me again, kissing my temple and holding his lips there as he pulls almost too tightly against him. "I have a temper, Ginny," he says softly. "I can't help it when I get mad."

I don't say anything to that.

"Don't," he says. "Don't turn your back on me. Stop doing this to me."

He kisses my temple again and grips my hand that I have up by my face.

"Tell me that you love me too," he says against my ear. "I want to hear you say it. Stop ignoring me," he says and his voice sounded different... it sounded desperate almost. "Stop ignoring me," he says sharply as he pushes me to my back so I have to face him.

"What do you want?" he asks softly against my skin as he places a harsh kiss against my jaw. "I'll give you anything you want."

"I don't want anything," I lie. There was so much that I wanted, so much, but I just couldn't say it. Not right now when Draco was looking at me like that. I lick my lips nervously and look down at the sheets. "I don't want you to ever order me to do anything again," I admit softly and he nods his head, like he understands, but he doesn't say anything else for a while.

I bring my hand up to his face and run my fingers over his cheek. I sigh and then I lean up to kiss him, letting myself linger there as my hand moves down to rest on his neck.

When I pull back, he smiles a little and I turn back on my side. It makes my heart thump. I do love him.

"Look," he says and he turns his body and opens one of the drawers of my shared night stand. I tuck my hand under my pillow as he fumbles around with the drawer. I lick my lips nervously. "I want to show you something," he says as turn turns towards me again.

He lays a group of pens and pencils beside me and I stare at them with my eyebrows scrunched together as he puts his palm over them and whispers a spell. The pens and pencils magically stand straight and start constructing a little building with one red grading pen balancing perfectly on the top like a lightening rod.

"What is this?" I ask as he lays behind me again with his arm over my side so he's spooned against me.

"My plan," he says as I stare at his writing utensil building held up by magic. "I know you've been reading my notes from my folder," he says gently as his breath ruffles my hair. "I'll explain it to you in simple terms," he says seriously as he flicks one of the pencils out and it clatters to the ground. "Rookwood," he explains.

He does it again to the right side and the building starts to sway. "Whitewater," he whispers and it makes me think of that Death Eater they found dead at the beginning of the school year.

Then he does it again to the blue pen, and then the yellow pencil and then the green gel pin that Astoria uses for her potions home works. He keeps flicking them to the floor, one by one, until all that's left is the red grading pen and a chewed up pencil that's holding it up.

"This is the Dark Lord," he says as he touches the red pen at the top. He puts his finger against the chewed pencil and pushes it, sending both of them to the ground.

They roll under my bed and I sit up to watch them disappear under the frame.

I get his little demonstration. I know what he wants to do and after seeing Rookwood die, I know he's serious about it.

"Why?" I ask when I turn to look at him.

He seems confused by my question and he sits up.

"Why do you want to do that?" I ask, motion to the bed where the graveyard of pens and pencils now rest.

"What do you mean why?" he asks sharply. "Why do you even have to question it?"

"Do you believe that purebloods are better than muggle borns?" I ask with a frown and he raises an eyebrow.

"I think purebloods are more powerful, yes," he says and I put my hand on my cheek.

"Why do you want to kill the Dark Lord?" I question again. "Do you not believe what he does?"

"This is what I know, Ginny," he says as he leans closer to me and he puts his hand over mine as it rests on my face. He brings it down to my lap and stares at our fingers together. "I know that the Dark Lord is a mad man," he says as he holds my hand and then he glances at me. "I know that the older generation that follows him have warped ideas on how a society should run and I know that the Dark Lord, the champion of purebloods, is not a pureblood at all. I refuse to take orders or believe someone who has dirty blood running through their veins."

"Dirty blood..." I repeat slowly.

What a terrible thing to say.

"The Dark Lord cares nothing of government or law. He has a one track mind to get what he wants and his main goal is to live forever. No one should live forever, Ginny," he says seriously. "He's insane and he's killing perfectly good wizards and witches to achieve that end. He doesn't want to better pureblood society. He's just using that as a ploy to get powerful and rich people to believe in him. He's a powerful wizard, but all he does it worry about the fantasies of children."

"And if he's dead, what will you do?" I ask softly and he leans in further, placing a gentle kiss against my lips.

"I will do everything," he says, but I don't understand it.

When I go to question him he silences me with another kiss.

"I want to show you something," I tell him as I lean over the bed to grab the contract I had stuffed there.

My shirt rides up from the stretch and Draco tickles my side. I snort and then glare at him over my shoulder, pulling down my shirt as he smiles at me.

"Rookwood wanted me to sign this," I tell him as I pull it out and place the heavy batch of papers on his lap. "I can't read it," I tell him with a frown and he flips through it with his brow furrowed.

"I can't either," he admits as he sorts through it. "This is a very old language."

"Why are there so many pages?" I ask and he shrugs.

"Can I keep this?" he asks as his sharp eyes scan the page. "I can translate later."

"Do you promise to tell me what it says," I ask him and he looks at me.

"I will," he tells me, leaning over to kiss me. "I promise." He puts the contract on the side table. "I know that there's a lot going on in your head right now," he says as he rests his forehead against mine. "Let's just sleep," he says as he kisses me again. "I'm tired too," he admits and I nod my head.

He turns off the lights again and when he lays back, I rest beside him and turn against his body, resting my head on his shoulder. He wraps his arm around me and I feel him kiss the top of my head as he lifts his wand and closes the bed curtains.

"What about my roommates?" I ask softly in the complete darkness and he squeezes his hand around my arm.

"It's a large castle. They can find somewhere else to sleep."

"That's not fair," I say with a frown as I try to imagine how I would act if I was kicked out of my own room for the night.

"Life isn't fair," he counters and I tilt my head up to his.

"Am I a part of that building?" I ask as I put my hand on his chest.

"What?" he questions around a yawn as I pull up the covers a bit more.

"That pen thing you showed me," I say as I place a kiss to his chest. Sometimes I can't help it. "Am I one of those that gets to be flicked to the floor?"

"Perhaps you're the foundation," he says as he scoots down and turns so we're face to face. "Thankfully I don't have to kill you."

Right. Comforting.

Thanks.

After a few hours of silence, I fall into a fitful sleep. I wake to his knee between my legs and I sigh softly as he crawls on top of me and kisses my neck. I'm halfway between sleep and waking and I don't even protest or consent when he slides into me with his lips against my ear, telling me that I was his and that I would belong to him forever.

I was so out of it that I think I might have actually agreed with it and I know I said yes when he hit a spot on my body that makes me lose all rational thought.

It went like that for a while, with him on top of me, and me feeling each amazing sensation, half lost in a dream. My bed isn't as solid as his, and it starts squeaking when his thrusts get more violent so I hold onto the head board and try not to make much noise as he kisses me and grips me and tells me horribly possessive things that shouldn't turn me on, but they do because I love him and I want him to want me so much. I think a part of me _wants_ to be possessed by him as backwards as that is.

I start to come out of my daze when he starts biting me, and I bite his shoulder in retaliation. I sink my teeth into his flesh and he hisses in pain, cussing under his breath. The pain must have turned him on more because he pulled back and looked down at me with darkened eyes before gripping me a little tighter. He switched positions so he could go harder and I grabbed one of his arms so he wouldn't send me flying off the bed in his need.

Unfortunately, I was fully awake when he told me he would kill anyone he thought I loved more than him.

I should have been more worried about that particular admission than I was.

"I don't love anyone more than you," I muttered tiredly when we were finished and I ran my hands through his damp hair as he rested against my chest.

"Let's keep it that way," he mutters against my skin and I close my eyes as I try to find sleep again.

It doesn't come easily.

In fact, right before dawn broke, it was me waking up Draco with my hand reaching under the covers in my need. He's not the only one who can initiate sex and I told myself that as I kissed his neck and gripped him under the sheets. He woke instantly and rubbed sleep from his eyes as I straddled his waist and leaned down with my hair falling over him like a curtain.

"Do you love anyone more than me?" I ask in a voice thick with sleep and he cracks his silver eyes open with his hands on my hips.

He shook his head. "No," he says simply before grabbing my hair and fisting it in his hands so he can jerk me down for a kiss.

"Let's keep it that way," I mocked him and he smiled against my lips before I started moving against him, slowly lowering myself on top of him.

Draco laughs a bit as he lifts my night shirt over my head and he throws it on the ground. The morning air is cold and it makes goosebumps rise on my skin, but I ignore it as Draco leans up and places a kiss at the center of my chest.

I was almost _there_ when the door opens and I scream a bit in surprise when I see Zabini standing there.

"Oh, _hello_," he says with a smirk in his voice. Draco pushes me off and covers me quickly with the blanket as my face turns so red I feel like I might melt. "I'm interrupting someone's sexy time," he says with a laugh in his voice.

"What do you want?" Draco asks and I bury my head in the pillow to cover my embarrassment. I even pull the blanket over my head to hide more.

"I was sent to find you," he says as Draco moves about the bed, no doubt getting dressed. I'm too ashamed to lift my head to see for my self. "Snape wants to speak to you. I suspect it's about Rookwood."

"Saw that one coming," Draco sighs and stands from the bed, leaving me cold.

I poke a little hole through my covers to glance at the clock. It's almost six in the morning.

"Put on your game face," I hear Zabini say as Draco gets ready and I clench my eyes shut.

Did he see everything?

I feel someone touch my shoulder and I clench my eyes shut when he pulls back the covers. "I have to go," Draco says in a tired voice and I nod my head. "I'll see you later, babe," he whispers as he bends down to kiss my cheek.

I turn at the last second and catch his lips. He stays there a bit longer as I bring my hand up to tangle in his hair for a moment.

"Later," he says when he pulls back with sincerity in his voice.

I nod my head and listen to his footsteps as they leave.

Then I hear a whistle and I look over my mountain of covers to see Zabini leaning against the door way, eying me like a predator with his arms crossed.

"My Weasley," he says with another whistle. "That was a gorgeous display," he says with a smile before turning of his heels and shutting the door behind him.

I slink down into the bed once more and try to wish away the embarrassment.

It doesn't work.

* * *

"Just putting the finishing touches on now," Mrs. Malfoy smiles as me as she puts the pearls around my neck. "So lovely," she whispers to herself as she puts pearl hair clip-thingy-ma-bobs in my hair. I look like a doll and I put my hand on my stomach as I look down at the dress. Mrs. Malfoy never fails to amaze me. She can make me look so beautiful.

I wonder if Draco will think I look beautiful.

I haven't had much time to see him since that night in my bed room. We had to appear "broken up" because Umbridge and Snape were still watching, and I was being followed. I never see who it is, but I can feel them and Draco must know something is up as well because he hasn't tried to come to my bedroom again. He says that things are getting very serious right now and that I'm under a microscope. He didn't even walk me out of the castle when we had to meet Mrs. Malfoy at the gates. I was stuck walking with Pansy who was glaring at Zabini too seriously to care about me.

And Zabini was watching my every movement closely like a creep and I figured he was picturing me naked.

It's a thought that makes me insanely uncomfortable.

"Well, that won't do," she says and I glance at her as she frowns at me.

"What is it?" I ask as I look around me, trying to find the flaw that would make her face look so displeased.

"That bracelet," she says as she shakes her head and grabs my wrist. "It doesn't go with the soft esthetic that we're trying to achieve with your outfit tonight."

"Oh," I blink a few times and then look away. How can I tell her that I can't take it off? That I married her son with out even knowing it because I'm an idiot.

Wait, does she know all of this?

She puts her hand on her chin as she eyes me over and then she shakes her head. "No, no it must go."

"I can't..."

I shut my mouth when she twists it with her fingers and it comes off. I stare at my bare wrist in amazement as she carefully places the bracelet on the table as my mouth stays slightly ajar. "Much better..." she says as she dusts her hands and then she looks at me with raised brows. "Oh, my dear, why do you look so surprised?"

"How did you..." I cough and try to cover my surprise. "How did you get that off?" I ask, trying to sound off handed as I look at the mirror and fluff my hair. I look stupid. All my hair is up, but I'm trying to keep up the appearance of nonchalance.

"There's a trick to it," she says as she looks into the mirror beside me to correct her jewelry. "I wore the damn thing for more than twenty years. One learns a thing or two after time. Now, let's go down stairs. Come on ladies," she says, smiling at all the young women in the room.

I don't move for a while until Daphne comes towards me and grabs my arm. "Come on, Ginny. Don't lag behind. You'll look like a weirdo."

"Oh," I say as I shake my head. I can't believe she just took that bracelet off like that! I'll never have to put it back on now. I frown as I think of Draco... of course, a part of me wants to always wear it.

All of the dinner guests are already sitting at the very long and very populated table in the dining hall and I gulp when I see it.

It is all very formal and everyone is wearing their wizarding best, all in shades of black and grays and even a few plums and midnight blues. I glance at my own golden color dress and I send Daphne a panicked look as everyone turns to stare at us. I stick out like a sore thumb. This dress is like a lit match in a dark room and I blush as I feel everyone's eyes on me.

"Why am I the only one wearing a light color?" I hiss as we walks towards the table.

"You're the only one that hasn't been introduced into society yet," she says as she smiles at an older gentlemen who has a pretty impressive white mustache. "You're wearing a different color than the norm so the men will know you can't be courted. It's tradition. You should feel lucky," she whispers with a grin. "I was never allowed to come to these things before I was introduced."

"I don't feel very lucky," I mutter as I look at the fall themed center pieces.

I soon find that there are cards on each plate that have peoples names so they know where they sit. When I pass Draco, I give him a nervous smile before walking along the table, trying to find my name on one of the damn plates. An orchestra is playing in the back of the room, filling the hall in creepy music that makes me feel cold and when I finally find my name, at the other end of the table where no one that I know is sitting, I frown the slightest bit.

I'm by a lot of freaking old people. Not just middle aged or early thirty old... but old like they probably don't remember if they put in their teeth in the morning.

I carefully take my seat and take my card off of the plate. I send a nervous glance around me. I'm definitely not in the kid section of this table. Everyone around me is old, very old, like white hair and dentures old and I nervously fold my napkin over my lap and stare down until Draco's Grandfather nudges my arm.

"How are you doing this evening, Miss Weasley?" He asks as he wheels himself beside me with his nurse standing over him, tucking the napkin on his lap.

"Fine," I mumble as I look at the chair at the head of the table, the chair I'm sitting right next to. No one is sitting on either head of the table and I worry my lip between my teeth as I imagine the Dark Lord sitting there, eating roast and vegetables with the rest of us.

"He never comes to these," Draco's Grandfather says and I flick a quick glance to him in surprise. "You have no need to be so worried."

"I'm not worried," I whisper as I look at the ceiling. Hanging jack o'lanterns are leering at me from above, flicking their lights in a frightening way.

"You're sweating," he points out and I furrow my brows. He leans over and puts his old hand on my arm. I look down at it. His veins stick up like mountains on his flesh. "Can you imagine the Dark Lord in formal dress, chit chatting with the rest of us?" He laughs loudly as I put my hand on my lap so he's no longer touching me. "He has never come to these dinners. Never has never will."

"That's good," I say gently and he smiles at me. I can see Draco in him. It's in his eyes, I think and the way his mouth moves as he speaks.

I wish I was sitting by Draco.

"I'm sure he wishes the same," his grandfather says and I snap his a look before the lights all go out.

"What's going on?" I ask but I receive no answer, even after I ask again.

I can't see anything and I start breathing heavily as things start whispering in my ear, hissing and spitting and saying demented things. I might scream and I reach for Draco's Grandfather, but I can feel nothing in the darkness. Suddenly a pumpkin appears in front of me, it's carved out face demented looking and smiling a wicked smile as the candle inside illuminates the small area around it.

No one else is talking, no one is moving. I can't see anything but the glowing pumpkin.

And then I hear the screech in the distance and I feel a panic attack coming on as I grip the arm rests of the chair so tightly that one of the fake nails Narcissa put on me pops off.

I hear the galloping before I see the horse and more candles flame to life show a headless horsemen galloping right towards me. I want to get up and run, but I can't move and I clench my eyes shut as I inhale deeply. I can feel tears leak out of the corners of my eyes and I crack my eyes open to see the headless man on his horse right in front of me. He has a sword and when he sticks it through the punkin I really do scream.

The lights come back on and everyone is laughing and clapping as Mrs. Malfoy stands up and smiles. "Wonderful display, Cissa," Some older woman in a large bird hat says as everyone claps.

I had no idea this macabre show was part of the act and I quickly wipe my eyes as Draco's Grandfather nudges my arm again. "Quite scary, right?" he says with wiggled brows and I give him a fake smile as I try to get rid of any evidence of my overreaction. "Halloween is always a great deal of fun at the Malfoy house."

I look around at all the smiling faces who are clinking their glasses together and laughing as another stray tear leaks from the corner of my eye. It seems like everyone was in on the joke but me and I look down the table to see what the other people in my age group are doing. Pansy is laughing at Daphne who's grinning with a hand over her heart. Cho is reenacting a scene to Millicent who is sitting by Zabini who's drinking his wine with a twinkle in his eyes... Draco... Draco is looking at me.

He looks apologetic as I wipe that tear away and I go back to looking at my plate.

When the clapping and cheers die down, one person is left clapping slowly... loudly, and we all look to the doorway to the figures standing there.

Abarax lied when he said that the Dark Lord never came to dinner parties, because there he was, standing right there in the doorway, clapping with his long fingered hands and looking around the room with a cruel smirk on his face. Bellatrix Lestrange and Severus Snape were flanked on each side of him and I gulped as his dark eyes danced across the room.

"What a lovely bit of magic, Narcissa," he says as he lets his hands fall to his sides. He's wearing a three piece black suit with a midnight cloak draped around his shoulders in a stately manner. "Really frightening. Although, I really don't believe the headless horsemen would be screaming considering he doesn't have a head," he says as he smiles a sinister smile and everyone laughs nervously. "Please," he says as he looks around. "Don't stop this dinner on my account," he says and then like they all realized who was in the room, they all got out of their chairs and got on one knee on the floor. Even the old people I was sitting by creaked out of their seats to kneel.

Everyone but me and Abarax Malfoy... but he's in a wheel chair so I don't really think that counts.

"You know, it's kind of sad," he says as he walks into the room, his shoes tapping against the floor. He walks along the other side of the table as I stay frozen to my spot. "Everyone in this room got an invitation to this... inspiring party... everyone but Severus Snape. Isn't that right, Severus?" He asks as he puts his hands behind his back. This is a long table. We may be in for a long night.

I look at the doorway where Headmaster Snape is standing like a tall dark pillar. He nods his head sharply and the Dark Lord smiles again. It's an expression that doesn't look right on his face.

"Why is that?" he asks and then he pretends to be thoughtful as he makes it down to the end of the table where the younger kids are still on bended knee. "Oh, that's right. You see, Severus Snape is a half-blood. Filthy muggle blood runs through his veins, but he has renounced his muggle father to join our cause. But there is tradition to follow in high blooded society, isn't that right? Tradition, standards..."

He picks up a silver fork and throws it on the table. It clatters against a serving dish and the noise sounds like a stampede.

"Money, blood, pomp and circumstance," his voice is loud and it echoes off the large walls. When he gets to the end of the table, he places his pale hands on the empty chair and looks around at the all the terrified looking people.

Why do they all look so terrified? Isn't this what they all wanted? Isn't this who they all want to rule the world?

"And he was one of my only loyal Death Eaters to follow me on this night to complete a very tedious task," he says seriously. "You are all well aware how potent the magical forces are on all Hallows Eve," he says as he taps his fingers against the wood. "And I find it strange that a half-blood was one of the only men in my inner most trusted circle to not call in sick," he adds, his voice rising so high it hurts my ears. A snake slithers into the room from between the large door frames and I hold my breath as it heads towards the table.

"I remained loyal," Bellatrix says like an eager dog and he sighs as he stands up straight again. "I remained most loyal, My Lord."

"Yes, and there was the lovely Bellatrix Lestrange," he says sarcastically as he motions to her. "Still loyal, albeit mentally disturbed, but loyal none the less," he adds as he starts walking again around the table again. He was on my side now and I inhale a few deep breaths. Bellatrix makes a face at the description of her, but doesn't say anything as he continues. "It's about priorities."

"We're sorry, my lord!" some old man in a top hat starts to plead, but the Dark Lord shoots him a hateful look.

"I'm not finished talking," he says, his voice dipping in disdain and it sends a shiver down my spine. The snake slithers under the table and I shake when I feel it's body run against my legs.

This feels like a nightmare.

"I accomplished a lot without you tonight," he says as he looks around. I feel like I'm witnessing a whole bunch of children getting scolded. "It makes me question why I even have you in the first place."

"My Lord," another woman tries to interject but he takes out his wand and blasts her across the room.

I gasp, but I can't move from my chair.

"But, I didn't come here to scold you," he says with another fake smile. I would snort if I wasn't so scared because scolding is exactly what it feels like. "You'll find I'm in a forgiving mood. A good mood, one could say," he adds. "I've found something I've been looking for for quite some time."

What does that mean!

"I'm feeling quite festive now... no thanks to you," he adds spitefully and when he gets to my chair, he pauses right behind it.

I look at my lap and try to calm my breathing but when he puts his hands on my bare shoulders, my whole body tenses and my spine tingles.

"You are not kneeling," he says as he bends down and his breath is a like a winter chill that rattles my bones.

I don't say anything.

"Your companion can't feel his legs," he says and I glance at Abarax Malfoy from the corners of my eyes. He has his head down and his arms folded on his lap. "What's your excuse?"

In a perfect world, I imagine I would have said something along the lines of I don't kneel to anyone let alone a murderous tyrant like you... but the world is not perfect and instead I just kind of made an odd whining noise that got caught in my throat and made me sound like a strangled cat.

He laughed.

Bellatrix laughed with him. It was a shrill sound that hurt my ears and when Tom ran his fingers up my neck, I shivered all over.

"Let's get back to this party," he says and when his hands leave my shoulders, I slump in relief. "You can stop kneeling now," he says as he takes a seat at the head of the table, right by me. "I wouldn't want any of you to ruin such fine attire that you've adored yourself with," He grabs the bottle of wine and pours himself a glass as everyone climbs back into their seats. The snake slithers along my legs again as he motions to the two Death Eaters by the door. "Please, loyal followers, take a seat," he says. "I think you'll find yourself at home."

Snape takes a seat at the opposite head of the table and Bellatrix takes the empty seat where the woman was blasted. She's still passed out against the wall and I stare at my plate as I try to calm my heart and block my mind.

Tom starts laughing and when everyone looks at him, he raises his glass. "To the half blood prince sitting at a pureblood table," he says towards Snape who raises his glass. Shyly everyone else raises their glasses as well.

I don't until I feel eyes on me and with out looking up, I grab my glass with shaking hands and raise it up.

Conversation dies flat after that as people clank their silverware and eat in awkward silence. I don't even bother to pretend. I put my glass down and stare at my plate as the snake slithers around the table. This is similar to that nightmare. Tom at the head of the table, a large snake moving around us as a table full of corpses dine.

I start breathing a little heavier.

"You're not eating anything," Tom says to me and I jump at the noise of his voice addressing me directly.

I swallow the odd lump in my throat. "I'm not very hungry," I whisper after forever.

"Me either," he says as he pushes his plate away. "Let us talk," he says like it was a private conversation, but I know everyone is listening... everyone is watching. "How was it to watch Izador Rookwood die?" he asks flatly.

I gulp again and feel sweat on my brow.

"Horrible I imagine," he answers for me as he takes a drink from his glass. "You know, I always saw poison as a very cowardly way to kill someone," he says, his voice deep and dark. "If you want someone dead, you should be able to look them in the eyes and do it yourself. Don't you agree?"

I don't say anything.

"You know, statically speaking, women are more likely to kill with potions and poises than men. Do you know why that is?" he asks and I shake my head.

God, does he think I killed Rookwood?

"Because women are crafty in their hatred... but men can be stupid in their acceptance of such hate."

I don't know what any of this means, but when the snake hisses at something I feel my hand starting to scratch the top of my thighs. I breathe with unsteady and short breaths as the room seems to be closing in on me.

Panic attack.

This is a terrible, terrible time to have one of those.

"I didn't poison Rookwood," I mutter out around my breath and he smiles, like my sweating, breathing, nervous tick display was nothing to him.

"Of course not, my darling," he says and I close my eyes. "You're made of all sugar and cinnamon, are you not?"

I keep my mouth shut.

"I have another inquiry," he says in a smooth voice. "How was it to torture Alecto Carrow?" he asks with raised brow. "I suspect that was quite a show. I have eyes and ears everywhere, Ginevra, do not think for one second that you are ever free of my influence," he says flatly and I shiver.

"Yeah," is all I say like some moron and I hate myself for it.

"Would you like to see what I found tonight?" he says as he reaches into the breast pocket of his jacket and he pulls out three wands. He places them on his empty plate and I look at them with my heart hammering against my ribcage so hard I fear it might crack.

Three wands.

I knew them all.

One was fourteen inches, willow with a unicorn hair core. Full of teeth marks and discoloration from spilled potions.

The second is a little shorter, a lighter wood made with dragon heart string. Perfectly polished and sanded to keep it in shape.

And the final wand made my mouth run dry.

Eleven inches, made of rare Holly wood with a core of a phoenix feather. Well used and full of power.

Ron... Hermione... Harry...

"I..." I stand up and the chair seems to screech across the floor. "I..." is all I say again before making a mad dash for the door.

I barely make it to the hallway before a full on attack hits me. I lean against the wall and put my hands on my knees like I was always taught. I put my head down and try to calm myself. I feel like I'm suffocating... I feel like I might die.

"Ginny?" I know Pansy's voice, but I just can't get my breathing under control. "Are you having an asthma attack?"

"No..." I inhale and exhale quickly. "I..." I try to catch my breath but I just can't. "Panic..." I try to explain as I put my hand on my chest. "Can't breathe..."

She doesn't say anything for a few moments and then she opens up her small clutch."Here, take this," she says as she pushes some pills into my hands.

"What... is... it," I ask with every inhale and I glance at her, my eyes just catch the bodice of her dress. It's a grayish purple with silky material bunched up to look like flowers all over her chest.

"Blaise had it with him," she says. "It will calm you down. You know you'll have to go back in there. He never comes to these things," she whispers like it was a secret. "I think his appearance has shook everyone."

I take the pills from her and stare at them for a few moments before pushing them in my mouth. I swallow them and it kind of hurts because my throat is dry and I try not to throw them up as I continue to breathe hard.

"Ginny, you can't just run out of the room like that," she says worriedly. "Not when he's here. Hopefully he doesn't curse you or anything." I actually start wheezing at the thought and she puts her hand on my shoulder. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. Of course he isn't going to curse you."

"I need..." She leans in closer to hear me as I wheeze like an old person dying. "I need... a healer..." I tell her because I feel like I'm dying and she furrows her brows.

"Here," she says as she gets down on her knees in front of me so her face is right by mine. She grabs my hands and forces me to look at her. "Everything is okay," she says sharply. "You are okay. Just calm down. Just breathe," she says as she exhales slowly to show me and her breath ruffles my bangs. "Breathe," she repeats. "Nothing bad is going to happen. It's alright."

I try to mimic her and eventually I do catch my breath. I close my eyes as my heart evens out and that feeling of extreme panic and dread slowly leaves me.

"Thanks," I whisper, gripping her hands before letting them drop as I stand straight. "I can't believe I did that," I whisper as I bring my hand up to my forehead.

"It's alright," she says as she stands in front of me and she starts fixing my hair and jewelry. "Let me give you some advice when dealing with the Dark Lord. All you need to say is Yes, My Lord, or No, My Lord. If he asks you something that is not an easy yes or no question, just say I do not know, My Lord. Don't look him directly in the eye and whatever you do, don't mention the resistance."

"Those wands," I say as I step away from her fiddling with me. "They belong to my brother... and Harry and Hermione," I say and then I look at her very seriously. "Did he kill them?" I let myself whisper.

I sigh in relief when she shakes her head. "That would probably be a national holiday," she snorts as she crosses her arms, but I don't find it funny. "I think he's getting closer though. There must have been a fight or something... that might be why he's so angry. We better get back," she says as she takes my hand. "We can't be too long. They may think we're conspiring."

"Right," is all I say before allowing myself to walk back into the room.

Everyone is right where I left them and I take shy steps towards my seat as the Dark Lord watches my progression into the hall with a dark brow raised in thought.

I sit down and put my napkin back over my lap as my body starts to tingle.

He doesn't say anything else to me, but he turns to the old man to his right and starts talking about something in Russia. I don't understand it so I tune it out as my mind becomes fuzzy and odd. I blink a few times as everything around me becomes illuminated in a nice golden haze. I touch the edge of the table and the fabric of the cloth feels like heaven so I dance my fingers along it with a little smile turning my face. When my finger tips touch the silver of my fork, I nearly gasp at the sensation. The walls seem to be spinning, moving in a delightful dance as the orchestra plays in the background. I can see the notes of music dancing in the air... purple, green, and blue floating above me in a wild dance.

I laugh at it.

Everything looks distorted now, like I was at a wild tea party with magical guests. I look across the table at the old man and the top hap he's wearing seems to be elongated, traveling all the way to the ceiling. I cover my mouth as I laugh and then I glance at Abarax Malfoy to my right. He has the head of a tiger and I widen my eyes as he cheers his wine glass towards me.

Wine.

I look in front of me. My wine glass is full and shining like a diamond.

I grab it and take a drink.

It's the most electrifying taste.

I hear a hissing noise and I tilt my head as the kaleidoscope of colors beats and pulses in front of my eyes.

I see a snake. A rather large snake and I smile at it. I swear it smiled back.

I place my wine glass down on the table and reach a hand out towards the creature so I can pet it. I smirk as I run my fingers along it's head, my skin vibrating at the sensation as I feel each scale. I run my hand down the snake's green and black neck... it's yellow eyes sparkle like the sun and I smile again as the snake tilts it's head more into my hand.

"Who gave the teenage girl drugs?" I hear Tom say and I blink a few times before focusing on him in that head chair.

There's a sinister light about him... He's surrounded by blacks and grays and I frown at that as his handsome face looks over mine.

"I did, My Lord," I hear Pansy's nervous as hell voice in my mind cloud. "I gave it to her to calm her down. I didn't realize exactly what it was," she hisses and I glance down the table. It seems insanely long and everyone looks troubled as she glares at Zabini.

Beautiful Blaise Zabini.

"And look at the spectacle you've created," he says and I know it's an insult, but I just feel too good to care. I go back to the snake again and smile when it lays it's head along my arm rest. "Nagini likes you," I hear him say and I blink before looking at him again. "You are lucky. She usually hates women."

"She feels like cotton candy," I say. He raises his brows and looks at me like I was a simpleton as I continue to pet the snake.

I remember the chamber and Myrtle.

I know how to speak snake!

I hiss out a few words I had heard my ghost friend say and the snake pulls it head back and looks at me.

"You just told her to open," Tom says and I look at him again as his red eyes flick across my face like he was trying to read my mind.

I don't even care.

"Where did you learn that?"

"From a ghost," I admit as I put my head in my hand. "Myrtle. You killed her, you know," I say and I hear some people grumbling at me, but I ignore them as I lean closer to Tom. "Why did you do that?"

He pauses for a second as he looks me over and then he leans forward as well. "You should learn now, my little drugged up princess, that I do things because I want to do them and I really _detest _it when people question me for my actions."

I frown. "You are awfully serious," I tell him and a cruel smirk tugs at the corner of his mouth.

"Enough of this then," he says as he leans back and takes out his wand. "Even though I love the ramblings of a intoxicated girl, I've had enough," he says and then he points his wand at me.

He hits me with a spell and I slump against my plate.

I fall into a deep sleep.

When I dream, I dream about blood.

A whole pool full of it and men and women in their swim suits are diving in and out of it without a care like it was nothing.

I'm sure that's a health hazard.

Draco walks up to me in a pair of board shorts and he hands me a glass of lemonade. His black rimmed sunglasses shine like a mirror in the sun and I smile at my reflection. He's covered in blood, head to toe, and then he smiles at me with a boyish grin.

"You should take a dip," he says as he nods to the pool of blood. "It feels good."

"I can't swim," I tell him as he pulls me up. I'm wearing a swimsuit. Some frilly white thing with polka dots and silver chains.

"I'll teach you," he says as he drags me towards the pool where people are swimming and having fun with beach balls and snorkels. "I can do anything."

"Who's blood is it?" I ask when we get to the edge.

There's a woman in a sun hat reading a book with her feet cooling in the pool and she smiles at a group of children who are playing a game in the shallow end.

Draco looks at me and takes off his glasses, his silver eyes are rimmed in red.

"Yours," he says before pushing me in.

I wake with a start and inhale sharply.

"I didn't come here just for this lovely party of course," I hear the Dark Lord say as I blink a few times. My head feels heavy and full of lead. I can't seem to lift it and I crack my eyes open, watching Tom as he taps his fingers against the heavenly table. "I would like to see Minerva," he says and I try to get up. I try to wake my body to follow my mind. I know that name. "Bring her to me."

Shuffling occurs and I blink a few times, trying to get out of my daze. "Minerva," I say slowly and then I get shushed.

I finally find the strength to sit up and I rub my forehead as some people from the table get up and leave the room.

There's a fork stuck to my forearm and I pluck it off then I wipe away some drool from the corner of my mouth.

How humiliating.

"I went to school with Minerva McGonagall," Tom says as he stands up. "A muggle lover if their ever was one," he adds, glancing at me as I try to fully wake. "And we all know how I feel about those kind of people."

I bring my hand up to my neck and blink a few moments before looking down the table, down at Draco. He's looking straight a head of him with his jaw tight and his brows raised.

A second later the doors bust open and two men come in dragging a battered and thin looking Minerva McGonagall. I blink rapidly, trying to shake off the pill Pansy had given me. I don't feel wildly high anymore like earlier but I feel like I have the worst hangover of my life.

None of this seems real and when the men throw my old teacher on top of table, I wince and scoot my chair back as she groans.

"Minerva, old classmate," Tom says with a smirk as he circles the table again. The others are watching the woman at the center of the table with dead eyes, like they were trying to place themselves away from the situation. "You have been no help to me what-so-ever," he says as McGonagall tries to get up, but she ends up slumping against the table, her head landing on a bowl of stuffing. "You didn't tell me where Dumbledore was. You didn't tell me what Potter was doing. You don't tell me anything of value. Last night I had to ask myself... why are you still alive?"

What?

"I believe it's because I keep thinking you'll eventually have some kind of use," he says as he stops by Narcissa Malfoy's chair and he taps his wand against his lips. "But tonight, when I was this close to killing Harry Potter," he says as he lifts his forefinger and thumb. "I realized you have been no help at all. In fact, you have given false information time and time again. But your lies are in vain. I know what Potter is doing and where he's going next. I know what you've been doing, and I will kill everything and everyone you hold dear."

"My Lord, if I may-" A man in a black lacy shirt starts, but he gets cut off rather quickly.

"You may not," Tom snaps hatefully.

He lifts his wand to McGonagoll, hissing a spell that grabs her ankle and lifts her in the air. She stays suspended there, hanging upside down with her finger tips grazing the table. He glares at her with so much force it's likes he's trying to turn her to stone.

"I will kill you now," he says and I shake my head. No, this isn't right. "And I will make sure everyone in your little resistance club knows of your death and I will let them know that you screamed," he says. "My loyal followers, take note," he adds. "This is what happens to people I deem worthless," he says before shooting another curse right at her chest.

She starts screaming, loudly, and horribly and I can't take it anymore.

I look at the three wands still lying on the plate by me and I grab one. Everyone is too busy staring at the tortured teacher to notice me take it and when I stand up and shout a curse everyone snaps their eyes to mine. A bird made of fire shoots out of the wand and heads straight towards the very angry looking Dark Lord. I try to hold the curse longer than I ever could when I practiced in the chamber and I watch with fear gripping my heart as the Pheonix flies right towards Tom. He dodges it at the last moment and a second later he's behind me with his wand at my throat.

"What were you thinking?" he hisses in my ear before gripping my arm with ice cold hands and hitting me with another curse that makes me pass out instantly.

When I dream, I dream of blood.

Swimming in a whole ocean of it with out a care in world and when I finally wake, I find myself laying on an expensive rug in front of a rather large and ornate fireplace. I sit up and when I hear a cough behind me, I snap my head towards the noise.

There, sitting in a leather arm chair with a book on his lap is the Dark Lord, staring right at me with a dark brow raised.

"Good morning," he says flatly as he lays the book on the arm of the chair. He stands up, his lanky form towering over me as I cower on the floor like a scared rabbit. "I believe it's time for you and I to have a talk, wouldn't you say?"

I gulp as my heart hammers against my chest.

This isn't good.

This isn't good at all.


	15. Chapter 15

"Where did you learn that curse?" he asks with a slender hand reaching into his pocket.

I watch his hand, fearing he will take out his wand and curse me until I go mad.

"Speak up," he snaps and I flinch away from him, still cowering on the floor like a trapped animal. I hate myself for the way I'm trembling and because I can't seem to look him in the eyes. I'm a coward. I hate that about myself too."Where did you learn such a curse?"

I don't say anything, I just stare at the golden thread on the expensive rug. I can feel that what little bit of patience he allows himself is officially running thin and when he repeats his question, I shrug one shoulder, the sleeve of my stupid golden dress falling down my arm with it.

"No," he says sharply as he takes a step towards me. I cower back and fumble with the sleeve, trying to pull it up without looking stupid. "You can not just shrug off that question. Where did you learn it?" he asks tightly.

I scoot back a bit more, closer to the fire, and it heats my back to an uncomfortable level as I glance around me, looking for a quick exit.

"That's not happening," he says when I spot an open door. He lifts his wand and it slams shut with a loud bang. I jump and feel my hands start shaking so I hold them together against my lap. "You had better answer my question now," he says, bending at the waist so he can see my face. "Use your words, Miss Weasley. I know you're not a mute witch."

I block my mind the best I can. Setting up wall after wall like Draco had shown me as I feel the slightest wind against my mind...

He's searching...

"I don't know," I lie with a whisper and he stares at me for a few more long moments before standing up straight with a sigh.

"You don't know," he says slowly like he was tasting the words, rolling them around on his tongue until he finally decides he doesn't like it. "I hardly believe that," he spits out and I finally find the courage to look at his face. The light from the sun is hitting his eyes in just the right way, making them crimson in color... almost purple, actually.

He's almost otherworldly in appearance and when he walks by the window, the sun illuminates him from behind making him look heavenly...

The sun...

"What time is it?" I ask in a panic as I search around for a clock.

We're in a rather large room with paintings of boring landscapes hanging on the walls and a collection of pipes resting on tables by the fireplace. I find no clock, but there are three large windows surrounded by thick maroon curtains that are pulled back by golden ropes tied in a bow. The place was a little gaudy, to be honest, but it reeked of wealth and old money.

"You don't get to ask questions until you answer mine," he snaps. I look away again and try to build another wall between myself and the constant intruder I find him to be. "I will only ask one more time. Where did you learn that curse?"

"A book," I lie again. I stare at his knees and then I become all too aware that of my submissive position on the floor.

I can't stay here.

I try to get up quickly, but I just turn into a fumbling stupid mess because I'm not used to moving with such a long skirt on. I stop dead when he holds out his hand for me to take and I eye it cautiously as I sit on my knees.

"I don't bite," he comments softly, his brows raised in slight amusement as he looks me over.

_Don't accept help from a monster._

"I'm hardly a monster," he says, plucking the thought out of my head in an annoyingly Draco way. He bends down and grips my arm, pulling me to my feet by my elbow. "What an awful thing to think."

When he lets go, I rub my elbow and glare at the floor like a coward. The strap on my dress falls down again, but I don't even bother to fix it this time.

"Take a seat," he says as he motions to a brown suede couch adjacent to the chair he was sitting in earlier. I stare at the piece of furniture like it might eat me if I decide to sit on it.

Tom walks towards a black wooden buffet along the wall where there's a crystal decanter full of some amber liquid. He pulls off the stopper and pours himself a glass of whatever it is as I cross my arms.

"Sit," he says again as he lifts his hand.

I feel something tug me from the middle and I get forced down to that stupid couch by a magical force. When I try to move, I find that I can't. I'm stuck, like my legs no longer work and they're cemented to the cushion.

"Better," he says and I watch his back as he takes a sip from his glass.

I feel like I might have another panic attack and when I imagine all the terrible things he could do to me right now, I find my brow sweating and my breath coming out in short gasps.

"Now, about this book you claim you found. What was it's name?" he asks as he turns around and leans against the buffet. "Not that I don't believe you, of course," he adds with his head tilted. "I just find it odd that any book would have the details of a curse that hasn't been properly developed yet. Don't you find that strange?"

I swallow hard and nod my head.

"Very strange, indeed. I would dearly love to read such a book. Perhaps it could teach me a thing or two," he says as he holds the glass up to the light and he watches the liquid inside of it for a few moments before looking into my eyes.

I barely feel it, but I see him sorting through my mind... and I try with all my might to block anything that has Draco in it...he pauses for a moment on a memory of me and Draco kissing and then he starts searching again... He finds me practicing the fiend fyre curse in the Chamber of Secrets... answering those embarrassing sex questions to Myrtle... I block the folder. I erase it from my memory and I feel like I have a migraine when he finally pulls out.

"Well, that was interesting," he says and I burn in embarrassment at the things he just saw me talking about. "Where did you get that book?" he says seriously. "That notebook that had that spell in it?"

"I found it," I whisper and he narrows his eyes before sighing loudly.

I blocked the folder, but not my notebook.

"No matter," he says, sending me a little smile as he walks back to the chair. "You're obviously lying to me, but the truth always comes out in time... and I have much time to spare, as you well know."

I shiver when he sits down and he crosses legs, resting his glass on his knee. I know his body looks young, but when he looks at me, with the sun hitting his magicked body like it is... he's never looked older.

"I don't know what I should make of you," he says, tapping his fingers against the arm rest as he looks me over. "People fall around you like flies. Izador Rookwood dies in your presence, Odette McAlister is rendered handicapped under your watch, you curse Alecto Carrow with an unforgivable, and you try to kill me," he says as he motions to his chest. "With a very controlled fiend fyre curse, I might add." he clicks his tongue as he looks me over and then he taps his fingers against the arm rest again. "You are turning out to be a very dark witch, Miss Weasley," he says with a smug smile as he takes a drink. "Although, I will add that subtly isn't your strong point."

I exhale slowly and try not to look at him as I bring a hand up to my neck. I can feel myself getting blotchy because I'm all kinds of nervous. I kind of feel like a trapped animal before the slaughter.

"I can appreciate your gumption. It takes a lot of guts to do what you did last night," he says as I slouch my shoulders a bit more. "A lot of guts and stupidity," he says and my cheeks heat in embarrassment. "I have to remind myself that you are young," he says sagely and I blink hard a few times. "And that you were under the influence of a mind altering drug," he adds and I can't help it, I look at him. "That's true, is it not?" He asks as he sits back, making himself more comfortable. "A girl had given you a pill to take, you were not in your right mind when you threw such a savage curse at me."

I don't say anything and he places his glass on the table. He misses the coaster by a millimeter. I don't even know why I notice.

"Understand this," he says as he taps his fingers against his knee. "An attempt on my life is the worst kind of treason there is," he says, his top lip curling back into an ugly sneer that makes my heart freeze. "I am willing to overlook your act and chalk it up to you being drugged. Would you prefer that I believe you were in your right mind?"

I shake my head.

"I didn't think so," he snaps and I look at my lap.

I want this to be over. I want to go home.

I don't even have a home anymore and that's depressing.

My whole life is depressing.

When I find the courage to look at him again, he smiles. It's a twisted look on his face and his teeth are still rimmed in what looks like bluish black ink. It's a ghastly sight to see a Dark Lord smile.

"I see much potential in you, Ginevra Weasly," he says thoughtfully as he looks me over again. I feel like I'm on display at some demented fun house. "You are a powerful little witch and, although you have much to learn, I believe you could do wonders if you follow the right path. My path," he adds with an incline of his head to make his point clear. "It's not just your blood either, you understand. With your back story and your family breeding, I think you would serve my image well."

I crinkle my nose because what he just said makes me think of being bonded with him... and bonded with sex... and babies... and I feel like I might be sick.

"Charming," he adds flatly, like he knew what I was thinking and when I look at him, I realize he does. "Please," he says with an unpleasant little laugh. "You're still a child. I have no intention of bedding an underage girl. I don't pick the fruit before it ripens, Ginevra," he says and I feel my stomach turn.

This conversation is making me feel ill.

"I may look young now," he says as he motions to his face. "But I have the mind of a man well advanced in age. I am much older than you. To me you are an infant. Though..." he says as he looks me over, his eyes lingering on the bare shoulder where my strap fell. "I do see the appeal and judging from the things you were saying to that annoying little ghost, it's safe to assume that I'll have an experienced woman in my bed when the time is right."

I might die.

I almost panic when I think about what Odette had said in the hallway about being bred. "I..." I start and my voice sounds odd and young against my ears. "You aren't... going to... like..." I didn't exactly know what I wanted to say. "You aren't going to... kids..."

I sounded like a fool, but he smiled again.

"I may be a lot of things, but a rapist isn't one of them." He smiles. "I have other means of getting the things that I desire than using muggle force. You are quite right to fear me as you do. I can make you do anything I wish with out much consequence. I could make you do a great deal of things you never thought you'd do."

A second later I'm leaning back on the couch with him on top of me, tearing at my dress... and to my horror... I'm kissing him with equal passion, trying to unbutton his waist coat in my haste to get it off of him. Then he's on top of me, inside of me, all around me and I'm enjoying every minute of his violent love making.

Then I'm standing by the fireplace with a wand in my hand as my mother begs for her life and I don't even bat an eyelash as I throw the killing curse at her chest. I push her dead body into the fire after she slumps against the carpet. I laugh as she burns.

Then I'm on my knees telling Tom Riddle that he is the greatest Lord and Wizard the world had ever known and begging him to mark me with his symbol. I even hold out my arm and offer it to him as my eyes water with love and devotion.

It's enough to make me want to throw up and when I come back to myself, I scream a little in surprise. I'm still on the couch... still fully clothed and still cemented to the cushion. It's like I just woke up from the worst of bad dreams and I blink a few times before looking at Tom in all his dark glory, smirking at me from his chair like he never left it.

"The worst prison," he starts as he taps his temple. "Is the prison of the mind, but you would know all about that, wouldn't you?" he says and I frown as he snaps his fingers.

A frightened looking house-elf appears. It's skin almost white in color and it's eyes a milky blue. It looks like an albino elf and I wonder at the rarity of such a creature before it hands a blood splattered folder over to the Dark Lord.

The elf disappears as quickly as it came and I'm left with the devil as he crosses his legs again and opens the folder.

Why is there blood on it?

"I had to kill to get it," he says simply and my heart drops into my stomach at the casual mention of murder. "Let's see here..." he says as he thumbs through the pages. "Ginevra Weasley," he reads as I stare at the folder. "The patient continues to have night terrors three to four times a week that has brought about a nervous tick in waking hours. She appears nervous at all times and self harms by scratching her fingernails down her thighs until the skin breaks. Constantly talks about the boy in the chamber in relation to her nightmares. Blood and death mentioned with uncommon regularity for age. Talk of suicide. Suggested admitting to a ward for surveillance, but denied by parents."

"What are you doing?" I ask in a soft voice as he turns over another page.

"Prescribed Gelatorian for panic attacks. Patient seems to be improving with each session and the dreams have become less violent. The sexual undertones inappropriate for her age have disappeared completely. Still talking of the boy in the chamber... possible molestation?" he stops and looks at me. "There's a question mark here," he says as he taps the page. "Your therapist was taking a lot of liberties."

"My therapist?" I say weakly as I look at the folder. Are those Dr. Carol's? Obviously they must be about me... but did he kill her?

"Yes," he says simply like it was an unimportant matter. "Complains of headaches," he continues as I cover my mouth. "Severe migraines. Parents reported that they found the patient sitting at the kitchen table at three o'clock in the morning on July third. Every drawer and cabinet was open in the room and a row of knives were suspended an inch above the table with the blades pointing down by wandless magic. The patient appeared awake, but unresponsive to any address made by the parents. When finally provoked to speak, the patient would only repeat one phrase: _The seventh moon is in the second house._"

I gulp audibly and he looks at me with a tilted head before going back to the folder. I don't ever remember that happening to me.

"The patient doesn't remember anything from the night. When asked in session, all involvement was denied and possibility seemed silly to her. Possible sleep walking. When talking of the 'situation' in her first year at school, large chunks of time and memory are missing. Repressed memories evident. When I told her that there were things that her mind had hidden from her, she said she had no desire to find them."

I stare at him with wide eyes, trying to understand why he's reading any of this to me.

"On December 26th, while home on Christmas break, parents reported that the patient was found in the middle of the night in the attic. The lights were out and she was speaking to something in the corner of the room. The mother reported hearing her say something about children being drowned in a stream. When the parents turned on the light, the girl screamed so loudly it woke the whole house and every light bulb was shattered. The girl has no memory of it and can't recall who she could have been talking to in the empty corner."

"Stop it," I whisper because I don't want to hear anymore. It was bad enough living with the confusion when I was younger. I don't need to hear it all again through the writings of my dead therapist.

"When I asked her to walk me through the dream she had that night, she had a panic attack and had to be taken to St. Mungos for treatment. Fear more abuse occurred at Hogwarts than previously thought. Prescribed Vadium for a more heavy sleep." He pauses a second and licks his lips. "I could keep going," he says as he looks at me. "It really is a fascinating read."

I shake my head and hold back tears as I remember how messed up I was after the Chamber of Secrets. It was all his fault and I hate him for it.

"My favorite part is when you nearly killed your brother," he says and I shake my head again.

"That was an accident," I tell him because I know what he's talking about.

Ron and I had been horsing around and he had tripped and fell down the stairs. Because of everything I was going through, they all assumed I pushed him. It took Ron to finally convince him that it was just an accident. My parents didn't look at me for a week.

"I'm sure," he says with a smile as he closes the folder. "It amazes me that you were ever allowed out of your house after all this," he says. "Suddenly you turn fourteen and everything is fine? Your parents pull you out of therapy and the nightmares are gone. I find that odd," he says with a frown. "One would think that my presence would live with you a bit longer."

"I got better," I tell him, feeling the need to claw my fingers down my thighs again.

"Right," he says with a smile. "You and I are a lot more alike than you know," he says seriously. "People will always try to fix us because we're different, because we're powerful. But we're not broken. You can't fix us and the world will find that out soon enough."

Tom said that to me once in the Chamber.

Word for word.

That makes me think of blood on the walls of Hogwarts... the coldness of possession and the frightened howl of a wolf...It makes me think of the boy I had known in the chamber of secrets, how I had admired and almost loved him to a fault...How that boy used me and took me over until I thought I would disappear into nothing... and my nightmares... and Draco and Draco in my dreams...and sex and blood and kittens.

"Your thoughts are annoying," he says and I snap my head to his. "It's a jumbled mess," he says with his eyes narrowed. "Thoughts, fantasies, dreams, and memories all jump and twist around each other."

"Oh," I say because I didn't realize my mind was so hard to get through.

I'm pretty simple, actually.

"It's difficult to tie down what's real and what's fake in such a mind," he says flatly as he moves the folder to the table beside him. "That is why I loath being around hormonal teenagers." He brings his hand up and rests a couple fingers against his temple. "It can be tedious."

I nod my head like an idiot because that's all I can think to do.

Then he stares at me.

He stares at me _forever _and I start fidgeting uncomfortably as his odd crimson eyes dance over my face and down my dress, all the way to my feet in the golden slippers. My lips are really dry, so I lick them as he studies everything about me and I try like hell to block my mind, just like Draco had taught me.

"How do you feel about Draco Malfoy?" he says and it makes me jump.

"What?" I whisper softly with my throat feeling odd and tight.

"Draco Malfoy," he asks as he runs his fingers across his lips. "I fear, from the memories I have seen in your mind, that Mr. Malfoy has taken his orders to procure you to my liking a little more seriously than I would have liked. What are your thoughts on him?"

Can't he find that out for himself?

"I could," he answers my silent thought with a tilt of his head. "But like I said, the mind of a teenage girl is like stepping into the outer ring of hell. I can't tell what's real and what's... fantasy," he adds, leveling me with a dark gaze. "Not that I couldn't find out, of course," he says smugly. "I can do anything. I just don't want to take the time, you understand. I'm an important person."

Fantasy. God, has he seen some of the naughty thoughts I've had of Draco? I'm sweating now, and I bring a hand up to wipe my brow.

"Well?" he says after a while. "Answer me."

I shrug. "I don't know."

"What don't you know?" he asks sharply, impatiently, as I tug on the bodice of the dress. Mrs. Malfoy didn't tie it as tight as Pansy did that one night, but it feels like it's suffocating me now.

"I-I don't know," I say again and his eyes narrow into small slits as he picks up his glass again and downs it with a flick of his neck.

"I'm running low on patience with you," he says in a deadly voice. "I am trying to give you the benefit of the doubt."

Why?

I don't question it outloud and I start scratching my fingers against the top of my dress. "I don't know what I think of Draco," I say, and that's only half a lie actually. "I like him," I say honestly.

"You think he's attractive?" he pries with a brow raised and I nod my head quickly. "No matter," he says as he flips his hand dismissively. "You've had your fun. Just don't do anything stupid," he says flatly, leveling me with a hateful look. "You'll have no time with this foolishness when you're with me," he adds. "You will have no lovers under my watch."

What did that mean?

"I believe I stated that plainly enough. It doesn't bare repeating," he adds, answering my thought openly.

No lovers under his watch? I dread the day when he thinks I'm old enough.

"What should I do with you?" he asks, looking me over again with his chin in his hand. "I could lock you away," he starts after licking his teeth. "I could keep you forever in one room with guards at the door. You would never escape," he adds like it wasn't a big deal. "You would never leave and when you finally came of age, I suspect you would welcome my company after spending years alone."

I swallow hard.

"Would you like that?" he questions cruelly and I shake my head so hard that one of those pearl clips comes loose, making hair fall around my shoulders. "No?" he says with a tilted head.

"No, I would not like that," I whisper out weakly and he sighs loudly.

"How about this. How about I send you back to school," he says and I inhale a deep breath. "But after you undergo re-education. It tames even the wildest beasts, you know," he says and I starts fiddling with the grooves on my dress.

"What happens during re-education?" I ask in a small voice. That was my main plan to see my parents again, after all. Let's hear how foolish that stupid plan was.

"It's actually quite simple," he explains. "The core memories of the subject are erased. It's a very painful process as you can imagine and it takes a very steadied hand... but eventually it levels them out so they don't even flinch when the dementors take their soul."

"Dementors?" I whisper as I think of Neville and Seamus... and even, god help me, Theodore Nott.

"How else would we retract their souls?" he asks like I was stupid. "It makes them completely obedient and, with their core memories gone, they have nothing to be sad about. It makes them perfect little soldiers. I have half a mind to do it to everyone, but I find individual personality too appealing... to an extent."

"Why would you do that?" I ask, feeling so overwhelming sad and worried.

"I already explained it," he says like I was slow. "Were you not listening?"

"No, but that's... that's terrible," I say like it would have any effect on the person I was talking to. "That is the worst thing I've ever heard. Why would you do that to someone... to kids? That's horrible."

"So many adjectives you're using," he says with a laugh as I try to process what life without memories or a soul would be like.

I was always taught that it was the worst fate in the world to have a dementor eat your soul.

"I find that souls, in a concentrated form, may be good for powerful magic," he says. "It's been useful in more ways than I could imagine."

"You keep them?" I ask, my voice shaking and sounding whiny.

"Some of them," he says. "It depends on the person. The dementors and I have an understanding."

I didn't know one could have an understanding with such creatures, but I didn't dare question it as I brought my hand up to my mouth so I could chew on my nails.

"Do you want that? Is that what I should do?"

"No, please," I say quickly because I couldn't think of a fate worse than that.

"Then I'm at a loss. You obviously don't respect me or the place I have held you in. None of your peers have been able to turn your mind on the right path. Is see no other agreeable option."

He lifts his wand to his empty glass and it fills again with the amber liquid from the decanter. I've never actually seen someone use so much magic for such little things before.

"No," I say quickly, putting my hand down and leaning forward. I didn't want any of that. I just want things to be normal again. I want to be home with my family. I want to be safe. "Don't do any of that, please. Just send me back to school and I swear I will behave. I won't do anything I shouldn't."

"And you will be grateful for that I imagine?" he says, sipping his drink again.

I nod my head.

"I find that a grateful follower is the best kind," he says as he sets the glass back on the table. He stands up, towering over me as I look pleadingly up at him. "I am not such a cruel lord," he says as he brings his hand out and pets the side of my head like I was a puppy. "I believe that you will be obedient... even enthusiastic, on your return to Hogwarts," he says, still petting me. "As a token of good will on my part, I will release your mother from Akaban," he says and my heart soars at the thought.

My mother.

"She will be monitored, of course, but I will set her up in a very reasonable little flat, far away from the dank prisons and dementors that have been in her life up till now. Would you be grateful for that?" he asks seductively with a dark brow arched in question.

I nod my head again, staring into his eyes... almost hypnotized by the color.

"I'm sure you would," he says, pulling his hand back and placing it behind his back. "As I am sure such good fortune would motivate you to be a more agreeable citizen of my new world order."

"Thank you," I tell him, sounding sappy and everything that I hate.

"Yes," he says with a smug little smile. "I have been very merciful with you today," he says as he walks back to one of the large windows. "I don't want you to leave here thinking me weak, though," he says thoughtfully. "If you so much as step one toe out of line, your mother will be the first to die... but not the last," I repress the shiver the tickles my spine as he continues. "So, I would suggest always looking at me favorably and cease all your silly little plans of revolting against me. You know they're futile and will never work out the way you wish them to. I have eyes and ears everywhere, Ginevra. Even in your dreams," he says darkly and I lick my dry lips.

There's a heavy pause as he stares out the window and then he looks at me again.

"Now that we are friends again," he says, with another smug smile. "I would like for you to tell me where you learned that curse you used against me. I can't seem to place the thought in your mind... perhaps you forgot because I would hate to think you are purposely hiding the knowledge from me," he says darkly and I start to sweat again. "Well, my little lady?" he says after a moments pause and I hate the term of endearment from his lips. "What have you to say?"

Lie.

Lie well.

"I found it," I repeat and his expression becomes stoney in appearance. I sit a little straighter and lean forward to convince the king of liars that I'm telling the truth. "I really did, I swear. I found it in the bathroom on the third floor where the entrance to the Chamber of Secrets is located. It was there... in the chamber."

"Really?" he sneers, feeling the lie and I nod my head, sticking with it.

"I swear."

He narrows his eyes for a moment and then tries to ravage my mind once more. I block it.

I actually block it and he retreats from my mind with his eyes deadly. He opens his mouth to speak once more but the albino elf pops back into the room and bows low to the floor.

"What?" he snaps as the elf hands him a letter written on black paper.

He takes it from the trembling creature and his eyes scan the page quickly. Then his lip curls back in disgust as he balls up the paper and throws it into the fire. "Get Mrs. Davenport for my guest," he says and the elf nods before popping away. "Do not think for one second that you are ever away from my influence," he tells me, waving his hand in my direction. I can feel the spell lift from my legs and I long to stand and stretch them out. "Remember my kindness," he says flatly with a glare. "I will never be so understanding again."

With that he leaves and I start breathing so hard that I'm actually making noises with each breath. I slump against the couch and bring my trembling hands up to cover my face. Everything that I was holding in during the talk washes over me like cold water and I'm shaking uncontrollably. I feel like I'm having an asthma attack and I clench my eyes shut, trying to get my breathing under control in case he chooses to come back.

A few moments later, a tall woman walks into the room with sky high red heels on her feet and an air of importance about her . Not wanting to look anymore weak than I am, I stand up quickly and she looks me over with a judgmental eye. It takes me a few moments to become accustomed to her beauty and I blink a few times as she comes towards me with a polite smile turning her features soft. Anything has got to be better than being alone with Tom Riddle and I thank every god out there for whatever that letter was that took him away from me.

"You look very ill, indeed," she says in a posh voice as she lifts my sleeve back into it's proper place. "I feel like we should clean you up first."

"Who are you?" I ask in a shy little girl voice that betrays my fear.

She laughs at me for a while before taking my arm.

My stomach growls as she introduces herself as Ruth Davenport, Mistress of the Manor we are currently residing in. I try to be polite despite my unease as she ushers me into a large dinning hall, all the while giving me empty greetings and pleased remarks on my dress. I take a seat and she takes it upon herself to unravel my napkin and place it on my lap.

"Are you hungry?" she asks.

I don't answer her and she eyes me coolly as she takes a seat across from me. When the food appears, I realize how very hungry I am and, not wanting to do anything terrible like faint in front of this well bred woman, I grab my fork.

"It's a great honor, you realize, that Our Great Lord has chosen my home to have a meeting with you," she says and I nod my head, not listening. "I am very pleased with your presence," she adds with a smile and I look at her once before going back to the food.

I'm just thankful to be alive, and I tell myself that over and over again so I don't feel guilty for the cowardly way I conducted myself in the Dark Lord's presence.

I take a large bite from the omelet on my plate and practically inhale it in my hunger as Ruth watches me from the other side of the table with a brow raised. I bring my napkin up to my mouth and try to be a bit more civilized before downing my juice. I have no idea who she is and I have no design to ask her because I don't want to know. She's probably someone terrible who does something terrible in a terrible place.

I know one thing, though. I know that this Ruth Davenport woman makes me very uncomfortable.

Maybe it's the critical way in which she's viewing my every movement with her eyebrows slightly raised and an odd little smile on her face. Or perhaps it's because she is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen in my life.

Yes, that's probably it.

She looks ageless, somewhere between the age of twenty to forty five and her skin is dark and smooth, the color of chocolate and cream. I'm not exactly sure what ethnicity she is either... she might be black, Caucasian, Asian...Indian...middle eastern... anything, really. Whatever the combination, it's lovely and I look down at my own freckled skin before deciding that I have bigger things to worry about than my vanity.

"Are you alright?" she asks and my eyes snap to hers.

She has green eyes. Bright green, brighter and greener than Harry's even and her eyelashes are dark and long, curling at the ends. She seems very modern in dress, more modern than the classic Narcissa Malfoy. She's wearing a zebra printed blouse that has ruffles down the front and black skinny jeans that look like they were painted on. I could see her lacy black bra underneath the fabric of the top and she layered a few different necklaces made of silver and black beads.

It was a little intimidating, actually.

Her hair is black and short, almost as short as Draco's, and it's curled and styled about her head like a model in a magazine.

I look away quickly when her eyes snap to mine. I look like a freak staring at her, but I can't help it. She has a long neck and high cheek bones and full lips and a small nose... and...

God, I think I have a girl crush on her and I start shoveling eggs into my mouth again as I try to banish that inappropriate thought.

"You are quite uncouth," Ruth says.

"What?" I say with food still in my mouth and I could kick myself for it.

I might seem stupid right now, but I know what uncouth is.

"It's just, you know," she says as she looks me over. "I expected more. Not that you don't look lovely, of course," she says as I look down at my dress after swallowing a large gulp of food. "This has Narcissa Malfoy all over it," she says as she motions to me and I frown as I wipe my mouth off with the back of my hand. "I just thought you'd be a bit more..." she moves her hand around like she was trying to find the word. "Polished."

Polished.

I put my fork down and try not to blush as I run my tongue along my teeth, hoping that I don't have something stuck in them. "Don't get me wrong, you have a certain charm to you," she says, her voice sounds like ringing bells in the spring time and when she smiles it's like sunshine.

Jeez, my thoughts are starting to sound creepy.

"But even under all that Malfoy glitz and glamor I can see the simple country girl underneath."

I think I should be insulted. Should I be insulted?

"Narcissa really did go all out on you," she says as she eyes me over and I let my hands rest on my lap. I'm no longer hungry, believe it or not. "She busted out her grandmother's pearls," she says as she motions to the beads around my neck and I touch them with my fingers. "I wonder why," she says thoughtfully as she starts playing with the silver chain around her neck.

My fingernails are probably dirty.

I quickly put my hand under the table.

"Special Ginevra Weasley," she sings like it was a song and I scratch my neck nervously. "It looks like you were raised on corn and sunshine," she says with another smile and I furrow my brows.

Was that an insult too?

She squints her eyes as she looks me over and I bite my lower lip as I look out the window, finding the branches of the tree fascinating.

"I think you and I will get along well," she says. "After we brush off all of that farm living that clings to a person after a while."

"Huh?" I say, rather _uncouthly_ and she gives me a patient smile.

"You used to work at the Hills, did you not?" she asks as she brings up her hand to rest against her chin.

She's wearing three silver bangles that clink against each other on her wrist.

The hills... Folk Hills... what people call it to make it sound posh.

"Oh, yes," I say, trying to be a little more _polished_ about it. "I worked there over the summer."

"Thought so," she says with a smile breaking, showing a row of sparkling straight teeth. I go to take a drink of my juice again because my throat feels very dry. "I believe I've heard my son speaking of you," she says. I miss my mouth as I look at her and some juice dribbles down my chin and rolls to my chest. My ears turn red as I put the glass down and I fumble around with the napkin to clean it up.

I wish she wasn't look at me so closely.

"Of course, he never said anything directly to me," she says with a laugh as I try to clean myself up so I don't look like a clumsy child. "Teenage boys never tell their mother's anything."

"Who is your son?" I ask softly like a fool as I clean up my mess.

"Isn't it obvious," she says with a large smile. "I'm told he looks just like me," she says smugly.

It took me all of two seconds to realize who her son was.

When I was around Blaise Zabini I had the same thoughts. He was so beautiful he didn't even look human sometimes and it would make sense that this woman would be the one who gave him those good looks. In fact, the more I look at her, the more I see him in her features.

God.

"Blaise Zabini," she says with a sigh, figuring I didn't know. "I believe he may be a year or two older than you."

"I know him," I mutter softly.

"Then you can understand my confusion," she says as she motions to me. I look down at the juice stain on the top of my lovely dress. "You aren't exactly a great beauty."

Girl crush officially over.

I narrow my eyes and push my plate way. Now she's the one being _uncouth _and I would have told her so if I wasn't such a coward in fearing another private meeting with the Dark Lord.

"But like I said, there is a certain charm to you," she adds as she plays with one of her necklaces. "Something I can work with when you stay with me over Christmas."

"What?" I ask flatly, snappishly almost, and she raises a perfect eyebrow.

"You'll be staying with me," she says with an impish smile. "Over your winter holiday. Originally you were to stay with the Malfoy's and take classes under Narcissa, but plans have changed."

"Classes?" I ask sheepishly and she nods.

"You can't just be welcomed into society because you know the right people. There are things you must learn, of course. If you want to be a true lady, you have to know which spoon to use," she says and I let my mouth hang open in surprise at the revelation. "And when to close your mouth," she says and I snap mine shut quickly.

"I don't..." I was going to tell her that didn't want to stay here for one more moment, let alone the rest of my Christmas break... but I remembered my talk with the Dark lord and I kept my mouth shut. Not a toe out of line he had said and I believed him.

"Good, it's settled," she says and she stands up, looking at the clock on the mantle piece. "I should get you back to school. Our Lord was rather specific in his orders of getting you back by a certain time," she says and I stand as well. "Let me fetch you a cloak for the trip," she says as she snaps her fingers and a frightened house elf appears by her knees. This was a different one, not the albino elf I had seen in that odd room upstairs. "Get Ginevra my blue riding cloak please. I believe it will rain soon."

The elf disappears and when it comes back it's holding a very lovely cape made of a thick blue suede. Ruth takes it from the elf and walks towards me. She smells good, like some kind of expensive perfume, and I get a whole whiff of it as she puts the cloak around my shoulders. It has a gold lining and a fur collar to ward off the chill. I look down at the clasp as she snaps it together for me. A golden swan with a diamond eye.

It was fancy.

"There," she says with a pleased smile as she smooths out the material along my shoulders. "Perfect. Let's get you back then."

It was uncommonly bright outside, but Ruth Davenport had been right. Just before we made it to the Safe App zone on her property, the clouds covered the sun and it began to drizzle little droplets of rain. I was pleased with the cloak she loaned me more than ever as I wrapped it around myself and tried not to think of my terrible situation.

She Apparates us to the castle gate and, before I head inside, I start to remove the cloak.

She puts her hand on my shoulder to stop me.

"It's a long walk to the castle," she says as she motions to the long path I'll have to walk by myself. "Just give it to Blaise. He'll send it back," she says before disappearing.

I don't want to give it to Blaise. I don't want to talk to Blaise.

I want to talk to Draco. I need to talk to Draco.

I speed walk all the way to the castle and nearly run to my dorm. First order of business is taking off this ridiculous dress and when I get to the common room, Pansy is reading a book by the window. When she sees me, she looks concerned for a moment before she sees what I'm wearing and then she stands up with her eyes raking over my body.

"Where did you get that cloak?" she asks flatly.

I look down at the beautiful cloak and take it off. After everything that just happened to me that is not the question I expected her to ask. "Ruth Davenport let me wear it home."

"You were around Blaise's mother?" she asks sharply.

"I'm fine, by the way," I tell her as I level her with a cold look because she seems more concerned with what I'm wearing instead of worrying about my welfare.

I did try to kill the Dark Lord with a fire curse last night. Someone should be a bit worried about my well being.

"Obviously you are," she says as she looks at the cloak in my hands like it was a treasured artifact she wanted to touch. "Why did she give you that cloak?"

"It was raining when she brought me back," I tell her sharply and she blinks a few times. "She didn't give it to me. I'm going to give it back."

"Why would she give that to you?" she says again, glaring at the blue cloak in my hand like I had stolen it.

"I just told you-"

"Give it to me," she says flatly. "I'll give it back to Blaise."

"What... no," I tell her as I yank the fabric away from her. "Why are you being so weird?"

"I'm not being weird," she hisses and I give her a glare before turning towards the stairs.

"Yes, you are," I tell her.

I don't say another word to her.

I employee the help of Astoria to help me untie the dress and she does it without asking me anything about anything. I don't even care. I would rather not speak to anyone right now. I need to be touched and comforted. I really need Draco. I carefully take off the jewelry Narcissa had let me wear and I put it in a small box along with the lovely hair clips. I will give them back later, I decided, and I get dressed quickly in more casual clothes. I put that stupid cloak Pansy had spazzed over in a random plastic bag that I found under my bed before leaving to find my boyfriend. He can give the cloak back to Blaise if anyone can anyways.

When I leave the dorm, Pansy is still in common room, glaring at me the whole time I as exit the door on my hunt for Draco.

He's not in his room.

He's not in the boy's dorm.

He's not anywhere and I become frustrated almost to the point of tears when I enter the library to find him.

I don't find him, but I find Blaise there and I'm thankful for the crowd of people as I approach him. He has a few texts out in front of him and he's writing something down furiously with his quill.

"Hey," I say uncomfortably when I reach his table and he looks up with a his eyes lighting up in surprise. "Hey... do you know where Draco is?" I start by asking because he did see me naked and yeah...

"He was held back at the Manor," he says as he looks over my face. "He'll be back later tonight, I imagine."

That makes me feel uneasy. "Is he in trouble?" I ask uncomfortably as I lean over the table a bit so I can speak softly. I feel like someone just told me Christmas was canceled. I really need his company and reassurance right now.

"Why? Did you tell on him, Weasley?" he asks, his eyes dipping to the neckline of my shirt where he can... clearly see down. I stand up straight with a snap when I realize that and I feel a blush staining my cheeks. "He's not in trouble," he says. "I talked to him this morning... and I'm surprised you aren't in more trouble, by the way."

He flicks me a sly little glance and I shrug. "I guess he was in a forgiving mood."

"I wouldn't count on that," he says as he puts his quill down. I take the seat across from him as he sits back. "That Dark Lord is a lot like Draco," he points out. "There's a reason for every action. It's easier to attract flies with honey, is it not?"

"I don't want to question it," I say quickly because it was true. He could have easily killed me or my family members last night and I walked away with my head still intact and my Mother possibly free of prison.

When the weight of the situation actually hits me all at once like a ton of bricks, I just kind of stare at the window like a zombie... just staring... seeing nothing... hearing nothing... feeling nothing...

"Weasley!" I snap out of my melancholy state and I blink at Blaise. "I just asked what's in the bag?"

"What bag?" I whisper and he nods to the plastic bag in my hand.

"That sketchy looking bag you're carrying."

"Oh," I whisper softly as I place it on the table. "I have something of yours," I tell him as I reach into it and pull out the cloak. "Well, it's your Mom's actually. She said that you would send it back to her."

He eyes the cloak for a moment before taking it from me and folding it on the chair beside him.

"She gave you this to wear?" he asks as he plays with the golden swan clasp.

"Yes," I say as I try not to think of what happened earlier. "It was raining and cold this morning... your Mom is very unpleasant by the way," I tell him with a frown as I remember my conversation with her and he snorts as he shuts one of his books.

"What a lovely thing to say, Ginny," he says, making a mockery out of my name.

"She called me uncouth," I tell him, feeling anger in my heart at the word. "And I'm fairly certain she called me ugly."

He laughs as he looks at me with his golden eyes twinkling. Yes, he looks just like his freaking mother. "I highly doubt she called you ugly," he says with a smile and I shake my head.

"She didn't exactly say ugly," I explain. "But she hinted pretty heavily towards it. She said I had a certain charm to me and something about being a country girl... expecting more and not a great beauty," I tell him as I go through the conversation in my mind. "I'm pretty sure she kept on insulting me, but in a weird polite way. It was really uncomfortable"

"My mother would never call a girl ugly unless she was really unfortunate looking and, even then, she would never say it to the girl's face. She was raised like a proper lady... she talks behind everyone's back," he says with a wolfish grin like his comment was funny. I don't smile. "You seem to have all your teeth and your eyes shoot straight. I would call you far from ugly."

"Thanks... I think," I tell him and he laughs.

"Or..." he says, trailing off with an annoying smirk on his face.

"Or what?' I snap.

"Or she saw you as a threat," he says and I raise an eyebrow.

"A threat to what?" I snap and he shrugs.

"It is curious, I would like to point out," he says as he touches the fur collar on the cloak. "That she gave such an uncouth country girl her best cloak to wear home in the rain."

"What's so curious about that?" I ask as I watch his fingers move along the seam of the cloak.

"My mother is hardly that charitable," he answers and I frown.

"Stop talking in riddles," I tell him in frustration and he laughs at me again before looking at the cloak with his eyes dazed.

"My mother has always favored winter weddings," he says in an odd voice. "She's been married seven times already, you see," he adds with his brows raised. "She's kind of a pro at it."

"Okay?"

"She married my father in this cloak," he says as he taps the swan. "My families crest," he explains and I feel confused.

"What does any of that mean?" I ask seriously and he smiles at me again, his eyes glowing yellow in the sun.

"That means," he says with a sinister smile as he puts all of his things in his bag.

"Means what?" I question impatiently because he's taking too damn long to answer that question.

He smirks at me.

"Mother approves."

* * *

"Do you think he was being honest when he said he would let my mother go?" I ask seriously.

"I don't know," Draco answers softly and I furrow my brows. "He has said a great many things before that have been lies... but I will say that he did not lie about killing her if you displease him. He will use your feelings as leverage. It's how he works."

"I thought he was going to kill me," I tell him as I look out the window.

It's raining and I follow a few droplets of water as they race across the glass. I run my fingers up Draco's forearm and I lean down to kiss his skin after the raindrops combine against the window and form a speedy torpedo heading towards the corner of the frame. I bring my hand up and start playing with his watch as I try not to think about how scared I was.

"I was so frightened." I lick my lips.

We're in a random study room in the Slytherin Boy's dorm that he was able to clear out for the night. Draco said it was one of the only places we could be alone with out being found out because he feared that his room was bugged by the Dark Lord after the Halloween dinner. That makes me feel guilty and I hate that I seem to ruin everything for everyone. As I think that, Draco brings his hand up to my hair and he starts combing through it with his long fingers. I nuzzle against his chest again and curl into him a bit more.

I'm laying in between his legs, using him like he was a piece of handsome furniture. He's actually quite comfortable. He's wearing a navy and green argyle sweater that's really soft and warm and he unbuckled the belt on his khaki slacks for me when I decided to lay against him. I thought that was a gentlemanly thing to do. I really needed to be cuddled after the time I had and I'm thankful for his company because I've been deprived of it since we came back from the Halloween dinner from hell. I rest my head against his chest as he plays with my hair and I listen to his heart beat as it thumps against my ear.

I don't why I find that so soothing, but I do and I close my eyes, taking in that wonderful cologne he always wears.

"I don't know what you were expecting," he says, his voice deep and gentle as he draws up his knees, caging me against him in a way that makes me feel safe. A feeling I find myself missing every so often this year. "You can't just do things like that and get away with it."

I nod my head. "I wasn't thinking," I admit as I tilt my chin up to look at him.

I just got done telling him everything that happened with the Dark Lord and Ruth Davenport. He was uncommonly quiet throughout the whole thing and I even had to ask him if he was still listening a few times because he barely made one noise during it all. The only part I omitted was when the Dark Lord read from the folder that he stole from my therapist. That was classified information and no one needed to know it.

"I didn't want him to kill McGongall. I really liked her," I say as I think of the teacher I had adored so much. "What happened?" I ask as I sit up a bit and he lets his hand fall from my hair. "After I left... what happened to her?"

He stares at me for a few moments before shaking his head and my eyes water. "I'm sorry," he says gently and I bury my head against his chest again, wrapping my arm around his torso so I can get closer.

What I did was pointless. It did nothing but get me in trouble with the worst person in the world.

"Why?" I ask sharply. "She was good person... a good teacher... a pureblood," I add quickly because that seemed to be the most important thing to everyone there.

"This is war, Gin," he says against my hair as I glare out the window. "It doesn't matter if someone is good or not. It just matters who's side they're on."

"I hate the Dark Lord," I say spitefully. "I hate him so much. I think I'll die if he ever tries to touch me."

"It won't get that far," Draco says lightly as he strokes my arm like he was completely sure of it.

"He knows you're my lover," I tell him as I nuzzle against his chest. "In fact, that's what he called you. It was disgusting to hear him say that word," I tell him with my face in disgust. I can't even describe how terrible he made the word _lovers_ sound. "I was trying so hard to block my mind and hide anything that would incriminate you, but I let a few things slip. He saw us kissing... and me talking to someone about having sex with you. He told me I could have my fun while I could because when I was finally with him there would be no more of that. It makes me feel sick just thinking about it."

"Lucky for you, I am a jealous lover."

I don't say anything for a while and I hug him tight as I watch the rain beat against ground.

"Do you think I'm selfish?" I ask softly as I think of Pansy and I feel him run his chin over the top of my head.

"No," he says simply. I lick my lips as I tap my fingers against the window pane.

"Pansy said I was selfish. She's been so mean to me lately," I admit and Draco sighs loudly, his chest rising with the movement.

"She's been on edge recently," he says, his chest rumbling against my ear.

"So, you don't think I'm selfish?" I say with a frown as I draw a circle on the window. He takes my hand with his left and kisses my palm.

"I think you're young," he says after pulling my hand away. I tilt my head up to look at him.

"You're only a year older than me," I point out. He brings his hand up to my face, brushing some hair away from my cheek.

"I know," he says as he studies my face. "But we grew up in different worlds," he says and I actually sit up, crossing my legs as I face him. "I don't think you're selfish," he says as he puts his hand out and taps my knee. "But I don't think you weigh your actions beforehand very well."

"What do you mean?"

He cracks his knuckles and looks out the window. "You're like every other bleeding heart Gryffindor," he says and then he looks at me again. "You have a lot of gumption," he admits. "You're brave and you do things on impulse, but you rarely think about the consequences."

"I think of the consequences," I tell him with a pout and he raises an eyebrow.

"No, you don't," he says seriously. "I'm impulsive too, Ginny," he says. "There's nothing wrong with it, you just... don't take into account the big picture. It's not your fault. You've lived a very sheltered life. And that's okay."

I slump my shoulders and bit and cross my arms.

"Like what you did at my mother's dinner... that fiend fyre curse? He could have killed you right then and there...did you realize that?"

"I just wanted to help McGonagall..." I mutter in a whisper and he sits up a bit straighter.

"I know, and that's good," he says as he grabs my hand. "But now, the Dark Lord knows that a controlled fiend fire curse is out there. He knows that the science has been completed and he knows you somehow learned to do it... There was a section at the Department of Mysteries that was studying that curse. I interned at the ministry over summer. He'll put the pieces together.. He's going to ask questions and all those questions are going to lead right back to me."

"I didn't..."

"You didn't think of that, did you?" he asks softly.

"No," I admit. "I lied to him. I told him I found a book that had the curse in it. He didn't believe me but he didn't find out anything else."

"Rest assure that the subject didn't die when your conversation with him ended. He will keep pursuing the answer until he's satisfied with it's honesty," he rubs his forehead like he had a headache and then he looks at me with his arms crossed. "I try to be very understanding of how... naïve you are," he says and I crinkle my nose at the name.

"I'm not naïve."

"If you're not naïve, then I don't know what else to call it," he says seriously. "I find it hard to believe that you would do half the things you do if you didn't know any better. You rarely take my feelings into consideration."

"That's not true," I tell him because sometimes I feel like he's the end all, be all in my life and all I think about is him.

"Yes, it is," he says flatly and I exhale slowly, turning my head away from him, back to the window and the rain.

I don't say anything. I want to fight him on this... but I don't even know what I want to say. I guess that just kind of proves his point in a way.

I scratch my neck before taking his hand and looking at his silver watch. I don't even know how he tells the time with this thing... it looks complicated.

"Ginny," he says to get my attention and then I glance at him. "Do you think I'm wrong?"

I don't answer and he sighs.

"The first time I took you to a party at my families summer home, I caught you grinding against some guy. That was the first time a lot of my people had met you, and you were dry humping someone else."

"I apologized," I tell him softly, feeling guilty all over again but remembering how rough he was with me afterward. "I was drunk and I said I was sorry."

"I know you did," he says and then he pushes his sleeves up to his elbows. "Then you made out with Zabini knowing full well how pissed off it would make me."

"I was mad at you," I say in a small voice, realizing now what a terrible decision that was.

"Mission accomplished if you wanted to hurt me, Ginny. The thing is, no matter how upset with you I was, I would never kiss someone else."

"But, you were lying to me... and I was mad."

"That only makes it worse. That it was revenge of some sort." he says as he shakes his head. "And you know that Zabini desires you."

I shake my head. "He's disgusting," I say with a scowl and he raises a brow.

"You lead him on," he tells me with his voice dropping into a rather hateful tone. "That's another thing that makes me mad."

"I do not," I tell him, my temper rising as I pull my hand back. "I can't stand him."

"That's not true. You constantly seek out his company with out my permission, or knowledge, I would like to point out."

"I don't need permission to talk to anyone."

"Come off it, you would be pissed if I was constantly alone with another girl."

"I'm not constantly alone with Zabini..."

"I specifically told him not to talk to you, but you've cornered him for information when you could have just talked to me."

"That's not..." I don't know what I wanted to say. True? Was it not true? I don't know.

"You kissed him, Ginny, and now all of his thoughts are dominated by you. He eye fucks you all the time, but you do nothing to spur his interest. How am I supposed to feel about that? Every time I find out you've been alone with Zabini I have to ask myself, does she want to kiss him again? Every time you 'comfort' someone like Dean Thomas I have to wonder... does she want to fuck him? Why would she be touching him like that? Why does she seek out their company and not mine. Doesn't she love me? Why would she tell me she does if she acts like such a fucking tease to everyone else."

"Draco..."

"I know when you're attracted to someone," he says flatly. "Did you ever wonder why it never burned when you were practically on top of Dean Thomas but when you barely touched Harry Potter it threw you two feet back. Didn't you ever think how upset it would make me to realize you were attracted to one of my friends in that way as well?"

"I don't like Zabini," I reassure him and he narrows his eyes.

"If you get mad at me, are you going to go sleep around behind my back to get back at me?"

"I can't even..." I was going to point out that the bond would make it impossible for me to cheat like that, but he cuts me off.

"That shouldn't be your only reason," he snaps harshly and I back down.

"I have forgiven you a million times even though you know how you drive me mad, how jealous I get. I told you all of that, but I keep holding myself back because I know you don't mean it. I know you don't know any better. I tell myself that you're young and inexperienced in a relationship with a person like me... but some times I get so angry I feel like I might kill someone. Someone I need. Someone like Blaise who is too fucking important right now for me to just off because my girlfriend doesn't seem to care that he's looking down her shirt. I know the world is scary for you and I am trying to be understanding, but you have to realize I'm in this too and you never think of my feelings. You have to meet me half way."

"That's... That's not true," I tell him, his words weighing heavily on my shoulders. Aren't I the one who is always upset with him? He never tells me anything... but... "I think about you all the time. I think about your feelings..." I tell him. "I love you," I add lamely and he stares at me for a few moments before leaning back and crossing his arms again.

In fact, to show him, I get on all fours and lean over to kiss him with my back bowed and my hands supported against the bench. I slip my tongue against his and we snog for a little bit before I pull back, licking my lips to let the taste of him linger there.

"I don't think you're selfish," he says again, looking out the window. "I just think you don't see much outside of your reach."

"You don't think that applies to you either?" I ask softly, almost timidly as I look down.

"I'm as selfish as hell. I won't deny that. I know what I am... but the difference between you and I is that I always know what I'm doing. I know how it will effect people but I do it anyways."

"I'm unsure of my actions," I tell him honestly, trying not to automatically run on the defensive. "I don't mean to hurt your feelings or make you upset. I'm sorry," I tell him as I blink a few times, my confusion making me hesitant. "Maybe you're right," I say with a worried frown.

"Maybe," he says softly as he pulls me against him again and I hold him tightly against me. "Zabini is good looking, but that's about all he is," he says and I make a face. I don't want to talk about him anymore. "Remember that over this winter break. No matter how sweet his words can be you should keep in mind that he will never be able to give you what I can give you."

"What's that?" I question softly.

"Everything," he says and I feel my heart thump. "I can give you everything and anyone else, especially Blase, can only give you a second rate cheap version of it. Trust me on that," he says and I lean up to kiss his cheek.

"I don't want anyone else," I feel the need to point out again and he nods his head before a silence falls between us.

Then my eyes water and I start crying out of no where like a freak. "Why are you crying?" he asks and I shake my head.

"I don't know," I admit. "Everything... I guess..." I say with a sob as I pull him close and cry into his sweater.

I realize I've become a terrible person who cried all the time, but I couldn't help it. I was too afraid... I was too sad... and I was too messed up to not cry. Draco didn't say anything more as I sobbed against his chest. He just held me a bit tighter and ran his lips over my head, gently kissing me every once in a while as I let all my misery fall out of me like a waterfall.

It was pathetic, really, how much and how long I cried. I just couldn't stop. There was a moment there where I feared I would never stop crying. I would just go through life constantly sobbing against someones shoulder as the circumstances of my life, that were so out of my reach, took their toll me.

"Sweetheart," Draco whispered after a lifetime of me crying. "Don't be sad. Your life won't always be so frightening for you," he says as he squeezes my arm. "I promise you that."

There was a very real possibility that Harry... and Draco... wouldn't succeed in their endeavor to kill the Dark Lord. Where would that leave me if they were found out... or if they changed their minds on the matter? I got a pretty good glimpse of it at the home of Blaise's mother and I think I would rather die than live like that.

"Harry isn't dead, is he?" I ask fearfully when I remember his wand lying on the dinner table at Malfoy Manor. "He didn't kill them?"

"No," Draco says flatly. "He did not... but he thinks he's close."

"I want this all to be over," I admit softly.

"I have no intention of joining the army," he says and I remember what we had been told earlier in the year. That once we graduated all the boys were required to join the army and commit to three years of service. "My plans should come to fruition by the first of the year."

That was pretty soon, actually.

"Don't die," I tell him seriously.

That suddenly became a very real fear of mine. What if he died or was killed if the dark lord heard his plans? What would I do?

He snorted like that was funny.

"We should go out flying," he says thoughtfully and I frown.

"It's raining," I say as I tap the window again, trying to let my tears dry and willing no more to come.

"So?" he says with a shrug. "No one will watch us," he points out. "Come on," he says as he kisses the top of my head. "I know you haven't flown in months. It could be fun."

I let a little smile come to my face as I pull back so we both can stand. "Yes," I say with a head nod realizing I haven't flown in ages and I really would like it. "Yes, it could be," I say, my mood automatically brightening.

I quickly put on my shoes and then I watch Draco as he sits down to tie up his leather desert boots. I sigh softly to myself as I look him over. He's always so well dressed. I look down at my own outfit with a frown as I pull on the end of my shirt. I always look so shabby next to him. I'm wearing a long t-shirt that Charlie got me last year for Christmas and a pair of black leggings. Romilda Vane told me that they weren't pants so I shouldn't wear them as such, but I wanted to be comfortable and now I wish I would have dressed up a little bit for him.

"Ready?" he asks once his shoes are done up and he looks at me expectantly.

I let go of my stupid stripped shirt. "Do you like the way I dress?" I ask self consciously. It was absurd that I even cared, but I couldn't help my trivial thoughts that came and went so quickly, over lapping with the darker situations that dominated my days.

He laughs a little. "What are you talking about?"

I look down at my outfit again and then to him. "The way I dress?" I say with a frown. "Do you think I look... I don't know," I shrug my shoulder and pull on my shirt again. "Would you prefer it if I dressed more like Pansy and Daphne?" I question softly and now it's his turn to frown. They were always so well dressed and so put together... like Draco.

"I would like you in anything you chose to wear," he says as he stands and walks towards me.

"That's not what I asked," I say with a pout because it wasn't and I needed a solid answer, not just the automatic boyfriend answer that every guy resorted to.

He gives me a funny kind of smile. "You know me better than that," he says, giving me a humored look. "If I wasn't pleased with the way you dressed, I would have told you. It's not in my nature to spare feelings when it comes to such things. And, even though I do play favorites when it comes to you, rest assured that I would tell you if I hated something you were wearing. Does that answer please you?"

Perhaps he's right.

The admission did help my mood and I gave him a smile when I realized his belt was still undone. He smirks when I pull him to me by his belt loops. "Can't have you going out looking like a bum," I tell him as I start to buckle it for him.

He laughs a little as he watches me. "I would remove your hands from that part of my anatomy or we'll never leave this room," he jokes and I wink at him before pulling back.

"I don't have five minutes to spare. I want to fly," I tell him with a laugh before leaving the room.

He's on me a second. "Five minutes?" he says in disbelief. "That's how long you think my love making lasts?" he asks. He walks beside me as we make our way through the common room.

"Love making?" I laugh at the words and he wiggles his brows when I glance at him. "Is that what the young kids are calling it now-a-days?"

"What else should I call it?" he asks with a smirk. "Making Ginny scream?"

I back hand his arm and he laughs as we leave the dorm. "Meet me outside," he says as he looks around the hall to see if we're alone. "Under the arch by the stands. I'll bring riding gear."

"Alright," I nod my head and let him land a quick kiss against my lips.

"Five minutes," he mutters with a head shake. "Honestly," he says with an eye roll. "You hurt my pride." I grin at him like an idiot as he walks off.

I wait a few moments, watching him walk away before heading outside. It's cold, I should have brought a coat or something. I debate whether I should head back inside to get one, but stop when I see Draco walking towards the archway with two brooms under his arm and a bag in his left hand. When he gets closer, I meet him half way and hold him against me.

"It's cold," I point out and he nods.

"Indeed it is," he says as he pulls back to open his bag. "I brought you this to wear."

He hands me a hooded sweat shirt and I give him a grateful smile as I put it on and zip up the front. It smells like him and I inhale against the fabric before taking the broom Draco gives me.

"Do you just want to fly around?" he asks as he hands me a pair of riding gloves and goggles. "Or do you want to play a game?"

"Just fly around," I tell him honestly as I put the riding gear on and then I straddle the broom. "Are you sure this okay?" I ask worriedly before I take off. "No one will see?"

"If they do," he starts as he puts on his gloves. "You know how good I am at making people convinced to forget it."

I nod my head and a second later I take off. It's raining pretty hard as we fly over the lake and the forbidden forest, but I don't even care. I dive down among the trees with Draco close behind me and I even close my eyes for a few moments as I give into the sensations. The pleasant sensations of flying that I haven't felt in a very long time.

In fact, it was during the flight through the forest that I closed my eyes once more and then, almost immediately, ran into a tree. I was pushed off the broom from the impact and I fell against the forest floor with a thump.

I wasn't hurt, just the wind was knocked out of me and my pride was deeply wounded. I cover my face with my arm as Draco approaches on his broom. I'm completely mortified when he reaches me and I refuse to get up because I would probably just melt in embarrassment.

"Are you okay?" he asks in a panic as he kneels beside me with his goggles at the top his head, pulling his hair back.

I remove my goggles and stare up at him, the trees protecting us from the rain.

"I'm uncouth," I tell him with an embarrassed frown as my cheeks glow red.

When I look at him, I can tell he's trying to hide a smile and I know he would really like to laugh at me right about now. "How did you manage to run into a tree?" he asks as he helps me to my feet. I go to retrieve the broom that, thankfully, didn't break into a million pieces from the collision. "I know you're a better flier than that."

"I had my eyes shut," I mutter in a small voice and then he really does laugh.

"Silly girl," he says as I pick up the broom.

Upon closer inspection, I realize that the wooden broom is cracked down the middle and I cringe as I look at the damage. "I think I broke your broom," I tell him with regret as I get on it and see if it will fly. It doesn't move. The magic has been lost and I look at Draco apologetically. "I'm really sorry," I tell him as he walks towards me to inspect the damage himself.

"It's alright," he says with a shrug as he puts the broom against the tree. "It hardly matters. What's a broom?" he asks as he looks at me with a smile. "Are you alright?" he asks again, walking closer to me and touching my arm. "Does anything hurt?"

"Just my pride," I admit and he laughs a little. I look at the broken broom and shake my head. "I break everything now it seems," I tell him with my arms crossed and he gives me a warm look as he kisses my cheek.

"Come on," he says as he picks up his own broom and gets on. "Let's head back."

I nod my head and climb on behind him, wrapping my arms around his waist and leaning against him. I send one more sad look to the broken broom before Draco takes off towards the sky. I close my eyes and lay my head against his back as he flies us out of the forest.

"Can we not go back to the castle right away," I whisper against his ear. He nods. "Let's ride around," I tell him.

He listened to me and we finally stopped flying an hour later. We found shelter under one of the canopies in the old Ravenclaw stands. I was soaking wet and shaking as I climbed off Draco's broom, but I was feeling better. I loved to fly, even if I was in the back seat it was nice to just let go. Draco put the broom on one of the bleachers, removed his goggles, and stuffed his riding gloves in his back pocket as I watched him. I impulsively pulled him to me and kissed him when I got his attention again.

He seemed surprised for half a second before deepening the kiss and I brought a hand up to his neck, letting my fingers thread through his hair. We kissed like that for a good while until he pulled back and smiled down at me.

"That was sweet," he said with his brows raised and I placed a kiss at the corner of his mouth before he sat down.

I took a seat beside him to absorb his body heat. Draco always ran warm and I was grateful for that fact as I nuzzled closer to him.

"Thanks," I say softly as I look out at the rain pelting the opposite stand... the stand that used to be red and gold but had been painted green to reflect our new school colors. "It felt good to fly," I admit with a little smile as I go over the dips and turns in my mind.

"I agree," he says with sigh. "I don't have to think about anything," he admits and then he turns his body, straddling the wooden bench so he can see me better.

I give him an odd look and put my hands inside the pockets of the hoodie I borrowed from him.

"I have a serious question for you," he says and I raise a brow.

"Yeah?" I say uncomfortably as he takes something from his pocket.

It's the bracelet he had given me over the summer. The bracelet I thought was the greatest gift ever given to me and the same one I could never take off... Until Mrs. Malfoy removed it like it was nothing. He lays it on the bench between us and I stare at it.

"Do you want to be mine always?" he says flatly.

"Always?" I repeat with a little laugh, thinking it sounded odd.

He doesn't laugh or even crack a smile. He just stares at me with his eyes slightly narrowed as the rain beats down outside.

"What do you mean?" I ask after an awkward silence and I pull my hands from the pocket. "Always?"

"I have tunnel vision when it comes to getting things that I want and keeping them that way," he says and I furrow my brows. "I'm giving you a very small window of opportunity," he says as he pushes the bracelet towards me. "Maybe I'm having a lapse in judgment," he says softly, almost to himself as I study his face.

His hair is drenched from the rain and a mess about his head and his cheeks are flushed from the ride we just took.

"It won't be easy," he adds seriously. "Being with me. You know how I am now..." he stops and trails off and he sneers a little to himself before looking out at the stands. "It won't get better. This is how I am and how I act. This is how our relationship will be. I can't help it."

I raise an eyebrow.

"I like order," he says as he looks to me again. "Everything has a purpose and everything has it's place. I've had my future set out for me for a very long time and I won't deviate from that plan."

"We're still young, Draco," I point out worriedly. "I don't think we need to have this conversation right now."

"Yes, we do," he says sharply and I blink in surprise. "I won't have this talk with you again," he says and I turn my body towards him.

"Why not?" I say with a frown. "That's not fair. Too much stuff is going on. I can't think that far down the road right now."

"I can," he says flatly and he taps the bracelet again. "And you will. Do you want to be with me or not?"

"That's not fair," I mumble. I put my hand on my neck and stare at the bracelet. "Well... what are your plans?" I ask seriously and he raises a brow.

"Once the Dark Lord is dead, the government will try to go back to what is was before he was resurrected, but there will be a lot of internal fights," he says and I start biting my nails. "I want this all done by the end of the year so I can go to University instead of enlisting in the army," he says. "Once I'm done with my education I'm going to work at the ministry."

"Doing what?" I ask and he raises a brow.

"What I do best," he says. He reaches towards me and pulls my hand away from my mouth. I look at his eyes and he raises a brow. "Telling people what to do."

"Do you have a plan for me too?" I ask cautiously when he lets go of my hand and he smiles a bit.

"Of course, but it's all centered around being mine," he pushes the bracelet closer to me again so it's right against my leg. "I won't force you to wear it again," he says. "But I would be lying if I said I wouldn't care if you didn't."

"What's my plan?"

He stops for a second and watches my lips before raising a brow. "You'll finish school and then go to the same university as me. You can major in whatever you want," he adds like I wouldn't object to him just choosing my college like it was his decision to make. "You'll have to get a degree in something. Education, or the allusion of one, is always important. After that we can have an official marriage. Obviously we're already bonded but this way my mother will have pictures to show to her friends," he says with an eye roll. "You'll also have to legally change your last name," he says and I just stare at him.

"You can write all day with out the burden of having to get a job to afford to live. We'll settle down somewhere in the north and have children... two possibly three..." he says thoughtfully and I raise my brows at the dull way in which he's speaking of this made up life he's obviously been thinking over.

"Two possibly three..." I trail off and he nods his head.

"No less than two, no more than five," he says seriously and I feel weird about this. "You never want to have too many children or two few when you're in the spotlight."

"Spot light..." I repeat with my throat feeling odd.

"You'll have to take public speaking courses. I suspect you'll have to make a speech or two when I campaign."

"Campaign..." I'm starting to sound like an idiot, but I just can't get my thoughts in order.

"I think people will love you. They can relate to you," he says. "Your humble upbringing and family life will endear you more as it has endeared me," he says, giving me a little smile that usually melts my heart, but right now I'm just... confused... "I will admit that I thought of living the life a gentleman and not worry about working, but I don't like to stay idle. With your station it would be quite accepted for me to enter politics and you are so sweet," he says as he takes my hand and kisses my wrist. "I will enjoy coming home to you each night."

"What if I don't want any of that?" I question and I watch as he clenches his fist against his knee. I could have had bigger plans than just marrying and having babies. I knew I always wanted to be a writer... but what about if I wanted to travel and live in France for a year? There was a good chance I wouldn't actually do that, but with Draco's strict 'rich house wife with a pointless degree' sounding plan, I would never be able to do what I wanted. "What if I say no?"

"Then you say no," he says flatly, trying to hide his anger at the statement.

"What about if I change my mind after this window of opportunity?" I ask him.

"I told you this is the first and last time we'll be having this conversation."

"Things change all the time, Draco," I tell him. "I'm in this relationship too. It can't just be you calling the shots all the time."

"Stop talking back to me," he snaps and I narrow my eyes at the snappish way he's speaking to me. He inhales a large breath and then tries to level his voice. "Do you think you'll stop loving me tomorrow?"

"No," I tell him honestly.

"Do you think you'll stop loving me five years down the road?" he questions more sternly and I pause a moment. "If you say 'I don't know' to that question, then you must not love me as much as you say."

I don't like where this is going.

"But, that plan... what if I don't want to have kids or anything like that?"

"Why wouldn't you want to have kids with me?" he snaps hatefully and I'm surprised by the venom in his voice.

"Well... I don't know... I just... what if I change my mind? What if I want to become like a healer or something?"

"Do you want to be healer?"

"No... but..."

"Then why are we even talking about it? You want to be a writer, yes? And all a writer needs is a typewriter and time to write. I can give you that. I can give you all the free time in the world."

"To wait for you to come home, like some kept woman?" I ask and he narrows his eyes dangerously.

"Don't you want to be kept by me?" he asks in a flat and deadly voice.

I don't say anything.

"Besides," he adds harshly. "You wouldn't be a kept women because we're married. You would just be my wife, doing what a wife is supposed to do and I'll be doing my role as head of house. Why are you making this difficult?"

"What if you meet someone else?" I ask, nearly choking on the words. "Will this effect you or am I the only one held to this now or never stipulation?"

"You're pissing me off," he says with a clenched jaw and anger flames in my heart.

"It's a good question to ask," I nearly start yelling at him. "You're just as much mine as I'm yours. I deserve to know this stuff."

"I won't meet anyone else," he says seriously. "I don't want anyone else and unlike you, I'm not constantly confused about my feelings and the life that I want. Do you want anyone else?" he asks sharply and roll my eyes. "Don't make that face," he snaps. "That must be the only reason why you're hesitating on this very easy and obvious fucking question."

"I'm trying to be realistic," I defend myself and glares.

"No, you're not. You're being stupid."

That's all he says and it infuriates me when he talks down to me like I'm a child. "Don't call me names," I hiss at him.

"I was trying to be nice about this," he says hatefully.

"I know that's hard for you," I sneer and he stands up. "Can I date other people?" I ask hatefully. "Or will I still burn because of the marriage thing?"

"Why would you even ask me that fucking question?" he snaps and I stand as well.

"Well? Can I?"

"No," he says flatly.

"Then that defeats the purpose of this little talk, doesn't it?"

"If I can't have you, no one else can either."

"That's what crazy people say before they murder someone," I hiss and he narrows his eyes dangerously.

"I'm walking away from you before I call you more names," he says sarcastically before hopping off the bench and taking the stairs two at a time.

Before he can leave, I start to feel guilty. He has been so kind to me today and I know he tries hard to make things nice for me. It is out of Draco's character to give such a choice... maybe this was him trying to be sweet. It's kind of sweet in a way... if someone else said it without Draco's demanding disposition I suppose it would be romantic. Is it so wrong that my boyfriend would want to be with me like that? No, I guess not. With a sigh, I pick up the bracelet.

"Draco, wait," I say tiredly as I stand up to follow him. He stops to glare at me over his shoulder. "I'm sorry," I tell him honestly. "But this conversation is kind of odd..." and worrisome.

"It's not odd. You're just over thinking it. I shouldn't of even fucking brought it up. My attempts at being understanding have been misplaced and now I'm officially angry."

"It wasn't my intention to make you angry," I tell him seriously. "This is just... a loaded question for me. I'm not like you," I admit. "Thinking that far down the road scares me."

"Then let me do the thinking," he says and I bite my lip. He looks down at the jewelery in my hands. "You don't have to wear it," he says and then he looks into my eyes. "I won't make you. I could," he adds. "But I won't."

He touches my arm and steps closer to me when I don't say anything and he bends down, placing a kiss against my cheek.

"It's alright," he says as he takes the bracelet from me. "Think on it, yeah?"

He starts to put it in his pocket and I put my hand on his wrist. "Wait, I'll wear it," I whisper and he looks at me.

"I don't want you to do it just to please me," he says with a sigh and I shake my head, taking it away from him and putting it on my wrist.

"I know," I tell him seriously as I hold it together so he can clasp it for me. "I want to wear it."

He looks me over for a few moments before nodding his head. "Alright," he says as he fixes it together for me. He pauses for a moment before bringing my hand up to his mouth and kissing my knuckles.

I pull my hand away and lean in to kiss his lips.

"Tomorrow," he says as he lingers against my lips. "After the Quidditch game, I want you to get in a fight with me and smack me," he says. I snort and pull back.

"What?" I say once I realize he's totally serious.

"Umbridge and Snape will be watching... I need them to see you break up with me. I know we've been avoiding each other but, with the Dark Lord knowing we're intimate, I need it to be known that you hate me."

"I'm not going to smack you," I tell him.

"It's not like you haven't done it before," he says and I slump my shoulders.

"That was wrong. I shouldn't have hit you," I tell him, feeling all guilty again. It's not right for boys to hit girls, it shouldn't be right for girls to hit boys either.

"I need it to be dramatic," he explains. "So it will resonate in their mind the next time they're around the Dark Lord. I need him to see it. Besides," he says with a sexy little smirk. "I like when you hit me."

"Don't be perverted," I reply and he laughs.

"I think you like it," he says with a smirk, leaning in close, only to pull away at the last moment when I go to kiss him.

"Hey!" I scold and he laughs.

"We better get back inside. I bet the Dark Lord will be having his minions looking for you soon," he says and I nod my head, becoming serious again when I realize that it's true.

"Aren't you one of the minions?" I ask, trying to make a joke and he snorts.

"Yes, a very handsome minion," he says with a laugh and I smile at him as we leave the stands. "One who, luckily, likes you a great deal."

I smile at him again and we part ways when we reach the castle.

I'm dripping water all over the floor as I walk back towards my dorm with a silly smile on my face. I'm playing with the bracelet on my wrist when I hear a polite cough trying to get my attention and I stop walking all together when I place it.

"Hello, Miss Weasley," Umbridge smiles sweetly at me as she walks towards me. "My, what have you been doing? Outside, in this weather?" she tisks her tongue as she takes in my appearance, her eyes lingering on the blue sweatshirt I'm wearing that is obviously male and obviously not mine.

"Yeah," is all I say.

She's wearing a yellow dress that has yellow feathers across the collar and sleeves. She looks like some demented bird with the face of a toad.

"Where are you going?" she says and I motion towards the stairs.

"My dorm," I say softly. "I have... I have homework to do," I say because it seems like I should have something to do when I get there.

"Ah, yes," she says as she takes my arm. "Allow me to walk you."

"No, it's alright. I know where my dorm is," I say and she laughs at me.

She is being a little nicer than I ever remember her being.

"After Mr. Rookwood's unfortunate demise, the Dark Lord saw fit to place me as the new liaison to the Ministry of Education. You will be reporting to me from now on," she says in a sweet little voice that makes me sick.

"Okay," I say because I can't say anything else and she pats my arm.

"I think you'll find that I'm more attentive than Mr. Rookwood was," she says and I swallow hard. "Don't send a man to do a woman's job, I always say."

I smile politely even though I want to run screaming.

"Let us make the best of this year," she says, giving me a grin when we reach my dorm. She pats my arm after letting go of it. "After all, your success will reflect on all of us."

Oh, now I see why she's so nice.

"It will be a good year," she says and I nod my head as she turns to walk away.

"Bye," I whisper to her retreating back.

As she walks, she leaves a trail of feathers in her wake and I watch them fall along the castle floor before going to my common room where Daphne bombards me with a new cheer idea for the upcoming Quidditch game.

* * *

"You gave her_ all _that money?" Daphne says in disbelief and I nod my head as I tie the trainers on my feet. "And now she won't even look at you?"

"I can't say I blame her really. She loved Theo... and it's my fault he was taken away."

"How was it your fault?" she asks as I hop on the little brick wall that runs along the lake and I balance myself on top of it as we walk towards the stadium. "Did you make the men take him?"

"Well, no," I tell her with a frown as I pull my cloak around me a little further to ward off the chill. "But I told Blaise, knowing full well something was going to happen."

"But you didn't know he would be sent for re-education," she points out and I shake my head. "Then I don't know why you're so bent out of shape about it. What Theodore was doing was disgusting and he made a lot of people mad. Draco would have saw it eventually, it was only a matter of time. You should tell Lovegood that."

"She won't talk to me, so it hardly matters," I admit. "She's all buddy buddy with Romilda Vane now." I feel my heart bristle as I remember seeing them together during practice and I sneer a little to myself. "I don't know what to do. I feel like I should go and beg for forgiveness but a part of me doesn't want to do that."

"Because of all the money you gave to release her father?"

"Yeah, I guess," I admit uncomfortably. "Does that make me a bad person?"

"No," Daphne says with a shoulder shrug. A gust of wind comes and she reaches into her blue pea coat to pull out a pair of white puffy ear muffs. "I think I would feel the same way," she says as she puts them on. "So, now you're like broke?" she says and I nod my head.

"I got my bank statement yesterday," I tell her, it's the only mail that I ever get. "I only have a couple gallons left." When I saw the total, I nearly cried, to be honest. I have been saving since I was twelve... it was hard to see it all gone in one swoop. "I guess that writing retreat is out of the question," I say bitterly.

It's not like I had a chance anyways in the Dark Lord's new world, but it was hard to let go of that dream.

"I'm sure you can still go if you wanted," she says with a laugh in her voice. "You know who to ask."

Draco, yeah. It always goes back to him. "Yeah," I trail off with a shrug as we reach the locker rooms.

"We should do something tonight," she says with a sigh. "Like have a girls night or something after the game. Things have been so drab around here."

"Will you invite Pansy?" I ask carefully and she gives me a curious look when we enter the room. All the other girls in the squad are already there and ready for the game. I take off my cloak, dressed in the cheer-leading uniform. I'm grateful that it's cold because we get to wear the black mock turtle necks underneath the revealing top. "I think she kind of hates me," I admit.

"She doesn't hate you," she says with a smile as she goes over to the mirror to check her make-up. "She likes you."

"I doubt that," I say as I send a look to Luna who is sharing a funny secret with Romilda Vane.

"She actually does. I think she's just kind of all turned around. She really likes Blaise, you know," she says and I nod my head. "And Blaise is such a jerk to her... She's kind of like Draco... she takes it out on everyone."

"She's obsessed with him," I say and Daphne nods her head.

"She's been obsessed with Zabini for years..."

"Not Zabini," I say quickly and she looks at me, her blue eyes twinkling. "Draco... she's obsessed with Draco."

She makes a face and shakes her head. "No, she's not."

"Why does she care so much about if he's happy or not? She was one of the main people who kept pushing me at him and, before the Halloween party, she was so mean to me... she called me selfish and that I needed to apologize to Draco and all this other stuff. What type of girlfriend would say that to me? Even if I was wrong for some reason... if she was my friend, then why is she more concerned with how Draco's doing than me?"

"Her and Draco go way back. They've been friends since... forever."

"That's fine," I tell her. "But she doesn't have to pretend to be my friend when all she is is a bridge for Draco."

"Let's not talk about it..." she says uncomfortably. "Let's talk about something else."

"How are you bonded to Draco?"

"Say what?" she asks, blinking her long lashes in my direction.

"Draco, I know you guys... all of you are bonded to him somehow... like I'm bonded to him. Can you explain that to me?"

"I..." she trails off and then we hear the music signaling the beginning of the game. Her eyes widen. "Ah!" she says as she hops up and grabs her pom poms. "Let's go everyone! We need to go!"

I frown and grab my own stupid pom poms, following behind everyone else as they jog up the stairs to our cheering station. We're playing some Swedish team today and I'm glad that it's a home game because I don't think I would have been up to traveling all the way to Sweden. Of course, I don't really know any of the cheers we're doing, so I end up just kind of giving up and sitting down on the one of the benches to watch the game with my arms crossed. I want to know how everyone else is bonded to Draco... and do they all want to follow him... or is there one who will ruin it for everyone?

I think that as Millicent passes by me on her broom. She drops the quaffel after a thin chaser from the opposite team cuts her off and they intercept it. I huff angrily at how bad she is and I cross my arms as I watch the rest of the game in impatient silence. To my surprise, Draco didn't catch the snitch. Their seeker, a rough looking bloke with black hair braided down his back caught it. I could tell that Draco wasn't happen about it and, judging by the angry sneer on his face, his team mates were going to get an ear full in the locker room. With the game being over, we all retreated to the great hall to eat dinner, but I was stopped by the Draco before I could go in to eat.

I could tell he was upset about losing the game, but before I could ask him anything about it, he cut me off with an absurd request.

"Hit me."

"I'm not going to hit you," I tell him sharply as he tugs on my arm and glares down at me after all the students, including the happy Swedish team, take their seats.

"Fucking hit me, Ginny. People are watching."

"I'm not hitting you," I say in a fierce whisper as the hall quiets down to look at us.

"Hit me, you cunt."

That words sends an angry pain down my spine and I narrow my eyes dangerously. "What did you just say?" I ask in a deadly whisper and he tilts his head up with that smug look on his face.

"You know what I said," he replies with a pleased little smile on his face. "You want to smack me now, don't you?" he adds like a know-it-all.

I roll my eyes and shake my head, crossing my arms so I don't actually do as he wants. "It's a stupid idea and calling me names isn't going to make me change my mind on that."

"Fine," he says bitterly and he takes a step closer to me and bends down closer to my face. "As your head of house, I order you to smack me."

Free will leaves me and I bring my hand up to callously smack it across his face. He looks very pleased with himself as the hall gasps at my actions and when the demand shakes off of me, I narrow my eyes dangerously. He said he wouldn't make me do anything against my will again and I find anger making my face hot.

To his utter surprise, I bring my hand up and smack him a second time by my own choice. That smug look left him rather quickly. "That's for calling me a cunt," I tell his surprised face before I walk off.

My hands are clenched in fists at my sides as I stomp down the halls. I can't believe that jerk. When I enter an empty corridor at the rear of the castle, I hear footsteps trailing behind me and when I glance over my shoulder, I see Draco's predatory approach. Why is he following me?

Of course, he grabs me before I can make it to my room and he pins me against the wall. "I think it's sexier with the uniform," he says against my ear before adding a bite.

It's weird that hitting turns him on so much and when I told him so he laughed and said he must be a masochist. I scoffed at the idea and when he pinched my bottom I inhaled a sharp breath, then he said I must be one too.

Then I remembered what he did and I pushed him back. "You said you wouldn't make me do anything with that stupid order head of house thing," I cry and he shakes his head.

"I said nothing of the sort," he adds with a little smile but I'm not willing to play with him right now.

"Draco, I honestly don't like it when you do that to me. I don't like not having control over myself."

"You're right. I'm sorry, but now there will be no doubt in anyone's mind that our attachment is through. At least for the time being, the Dark Lord can rest assured that there isn't a traitor among his inner circle."

"What if someone see's you mauling me?" I ask with a brow raised when he starts kissing my neck. "All that hitting was for not."

"I have half a mind to make you quit," he says, totally ignoring me as his hand runs along my midriff under the dark turtle neck. "Everyone stares at you when you wear this."

"I thought you liked my uniform," I fake pout as I bring my hand up to his arm, officially forgiving him because I love him.

"That was before, when everyone knew you were mine," he says seriously. "I could show you off," he adds. "Now you're free game. I don't like it..." he says, trailing off with a frown on his face.

It's actually kind of adorable to see him frown that way and I laugh as I kiss him. "I'm hardly that in demand," I tell him as I bring my arms up to his neck. "Stop pouting," I tell him with a pleased smile and he smirks, lifting me up. I squeal in surprise and grip his shoulders.

"Draco!" I say with a laugh as he lifts me up and I cover my mouth because that was really loud. "You're going to get us caught."

"I need to take you somewhere," he says as he kisses me again, a quick snap against my lips.

"We can't go to your room. We can't go to my room. We can't go anywhere," I tell him as I run my hand over his cheek. "You said everyone is always watching. I guess we just have to..."

"We could go to the green house," he says quickly as he looks down the hallway.

"What if Sprout is there?"

"I can knock her out," he says seriously and I snort in laughter at how needy he's being.

He really wants to get laid right now.

"You can't do that," I tell him softly because I know he totally would. "Wait..." I say when he cusses under his breath. "I know a place," I say as I think of the room of requirement.

"Where's that, copper top ?" he says, kissing my jaw and I snort again at the nickname.

"Come on," I tell him as I take his hand. "I can show you."

We sneak around like children playing hide and seek, hiding behind statues and running down halls as people pass us. When we get to the third floor, Draco smirks as he rubs his hand up the back of my skirt.

"I remember this," he says with a smug smile and I shake my head before going towards wall and walking three times in front of it.

A door appears and inside we find a rather posh looking living room with large fluffy white couches and yellow walls.

"This is cozy," he says before grabbing me around the waist and walking me back towards one of the couches. "Good thing too," he says as he pushes me down. He stands in front of me as he starts to unbuckle his belt slowly. "I'm not in a good mood. I can't believe that fucking git caught the snitch before I did. I have half a mind to think he cheated."

"You would think that," I tell him with a smile as I scoot to the end of the couch to help him unbutton his riding pants.

"I do," he says with a smug smile. "There is no way I would have lost during a fair match and it didn't help that I was completely distracted by you wearing this ridiculously short skirt. It was just a recipe for disaster and I can't be held accountable for it."

"I sat out for most of the game," I tell him with a smile and he nods his head as he bends down to kiss me. He fingers work their way behind my back and he has my top and turtle neck lying on the floor in two seconds flat.

"It doesn't matter," he says sharply and I smirk as he pushes me back until I'm laying on the couch.

I make room for him by spreading my legs and I let him crawl on top of me after he throws off his Quidditch jersey. God, he's so good looking and I readily pull him down to me for a passionate kiss. I was wearing a sports bra, so he couldn't easily unclasp it like he normally would and he cussed to himself in frustration when he realized I would have to sit up to take it off. I laughed at it, of course, and he gave me room to move as I threw the bra with my other clothes. It was nice and warm in the room and I was turned on so I was feeling the heat even more so than usual as I pulled him back down to me. I was more than ready to give in to him, until I remember something very alarming.

"Wait..." I tell him with a sigh, I push his hips back a bit and he narrows his eyes. "I haven't..." I trial of uncomfortably as I shift underneath him.

"What is it?" he snaps impatiently and I bite my lower lip.

"I haven't taken any of those potions," I tell him with my legs wrapped around his. "That birth control potion. You said I needed to take it every three months."

"It's okay," he says, bending down to kiss my neck. "I'll pull out."

"Draco," I push him back again. "I don't want to have a baby."

"Neither do I," he says seriously.

"Everyone keeps talking about that," I tell him worriedly, admitting another secret fear of mine. "There's a lot of foreshadowing that makes me uncomfortable."

He sighs and rests his elbow against the couch so he can support his head. "No one's foreshadowing anything. I have a plan, Gin, and teenage pregnancy isn't one of them. I can't go into politics with that stain on my reputation," he says and I frown as I look at him.

"But Blaise said..."

"How about you not worry about what Zabini says," he says flatly. After a few moments he brings his hand down and get to work on removing my skirt and knickers. "But he was right," he says seriously when he pulls them down my legs, leaving me totally naked to the soft lighting in the room. "The Dark Lord's claim is older than mine," he says as he glares down at me like it was my fault. "Only a child could break it. So either he has to die soon or..."

"Baby," I say flatly and he nods his head as I take out my hair tie, letting my hair fall back freely against the pillows.

"It would instantly break any tie he had to you," he says as he pulls down his own pants and boxers. I watch the movement, always fascinated with his body. "The contract he wanted you to sign would further cement that tie."

"What did it say?" I ask softly as he begins touching my body intimately to get it ready for him

"A lot of things," he says seriously, never once stopping his clever fingers. "It would act mostly as a gag order of some sort. You physically wouldn't be able to say anything negative about him or about your time spent alone with him. It would bar you from contact with certain fractions of society and it would sign over all rights you had, including parental, to him. You wouldn't be able to go to the loo without his permission. He would be able to do that," he says. "With that claim he has."

I bite my lower lip, my mind worried about what he just said and my body worried about how good his fingers feel. "Isn't there any other way?" I ask softly as I grab his shoulder and lift my hips.

"You know what I plan on doing..." he says and I can't help myself, I lean up and kiss his jaw just because I feel like kissing him when he touches me like that.

"But what if you don't? What if it takes longer for you to do that?"

"There's only one way to break that bond he has with you besides the baby thing, but there's no way of actually knowing it."

"What is it?" I ask in a whisper against his ear that makes his body shiver. I smirk at the movement and the smug way it makes me feel to have that effect on him.

"Which ever side did the spell first... whoever initiated it might be able to do a counter spell," he says. "It was so long ago and it's a very strong might... I would place money on the spell cast on the Slytherin side," he says, looking deeply into my eyes as he wets his lower lip. He's sexy and I can't help but think that besides the serious conversation we're having. "We're all sneaky bastards."

I smile a little.

"But like I said, hopefully there will be no worry for you on the matter," he says and I bite my lower lip again when a pleasurable hum ripples through my body. "My first course of action is always the best."

Right.

He kisses me again and then he removes his fingers and I pout at him as he smiles at my disappointment. "Stop being so impatient," he says as he kisses my collar bone. I know where his downward trail is leading him and I smile at the thought.

"Are you going to give me a suck job?" I ask with a smirk and he raises a brow as he kisses my stomach.

"What?" he asks with a laugh and I run my hands through his hair.

"Never mind, inside joke," I admit to him with a smile as I think of my ridiculous time in the Chamber with that perverted ghost.

"Who do you have an inside joke with?" he asks, his face losing some of it's humor as he wraps a hand around my waist.

"No one important," I say, still feeling playful and his face becomes a lot more serious than I would have liked.

"Tell me," he says as he sits up a little and I frown at the dark look on his face. "Saying inside jokes but not sharing them is very annoying," he says and I try to shake off how ridiculous he's being by leaning up and smiling as I touch his chest.

"Don't be silly," I tell him as I move forward to place a kiss against his neck.

He pulls away. "Why aren't you telling me?" he asks suspiciously and I give him a disbelieving look. "Is it a guy?" he asks and I give him a surprised look because of the conclusion that he just automatically jumped to. "Is it Dean Thomas?" he asks and I give him a nervous laugh.

"What are you talking about?" I ask as I try to pull him to me again. "It's not a guy. Don't be ridiculous. "

"Then fucking tell me," he snaps and I try to quench my anger at how he's speaking to me to reassure him of my feelings.

"It was that ghost," I tell him softly with a furrowed brow, all playfulness gone. "From the bathroom. Moaning Myrtle. She kept calling a blow job a suck job... I thought it was funny," I tell him with a frown as he studies my face, looking for the lie. "Why are being so serious?" I implore and he runs his hand through his hair before crawling back on top of me, pushing me against he cushions in the process.

"You should have said that from the beginning," he says flatly as he parts my legs and pushes into me.

I'm not half so turned on anymore and I turn my head to the side because I find myself not in the mood as he slides in and out of me. He just ruined the moment for me and I shut my eyes as he works on top of me, getting harder and faster with each thrust of his hips. This wasn't the loving sex I had been looking forward to just a moment ago and I tried not to think too much about it as his body slid in and out of my own, creating amazing friction.

After a while I, begrudgingly, started to get into it again and I wrapped my legs tightly around him as he drilled into me, leaving bites and kisses on my neck and shoulder. By my first orgasm he was officially forgiven for being such a demanding sort of person and I was kissing him full on by the time he was ready to finish.

"Pull out," I reminded him between kisses as I ran my fingers down his back. We were both sweating. He was holding out for a remarkable amount of time and I suspect my 'five minute' comment that I had teased him with had really made him want to refute that claim.

He mumbles something against my neck... something that sounds suspiciously like _no_, and I frown as he puts one of my legs in the crook of his elbow, pulling it up further.

I forgot for a moment, what I was saying in the first place, but when his movements became less controlled and more jerky, I realized what was about to happen.

"Remember to pull out, Drake," I tell him softly, shortening his already short name to endear him more.

I like to think he heard me. I like to think that he was going to do as I said despite not answering me, but when his body started to tense and he made three more long and deep movements against me... I knew he was done and he had _not_ pulled out.

He collapses on top of me, breathing heavily into my ear as I pet down his hair. He stays there for a few moments before exhaling a slow breath and moving to my side, finally pulling out of me.

"You didn't pull out," I point out flatly as I put my fingers in between my legs. I wish I wouldn't have, actually. It was a mixture of mine and Draco's arousal that coated my fingers and I made a face as I wiped it on the couch.

"No," he said breathlessly. "I didn't."

"You have more birth control potion in your room, right?" I say, trying not to freak out about it. After all, not everyone gets pregnant that easily and I was sure it would be the case with this. "I can take it soon?"

"Yes," he says with his hand on his chest and then he sat up to clean himself up and put on his pants.

That was all he said, and I sat up, moving sweaty hair out of my face as I scooted towards him and kissed his shoulder.

"It would be nice to live in here for a while," I muse as I look around the room. He puts on his shoes. "This is a magnificent room, don't you think?"

"It is nice," he says. He looks around him and then he glances at me as I run my fingers lovingly through his hair.

He stares at me for a few serious moments before he smiles a little to himself and turns away.

"What was that?" I ask, matching his smile because it makes him look so handsome. "What was the smile for?"

"I just like you a lot," he says with a boyish smile as he ties his riding boots and I laugh a little as I reach for my clothes as well.

"I'm glad you _like_ me," I tell him sarcastically, making fun of the word.

"Not many people have that honor," he tells me as I put on the sports bra and knickers.

"You only _like_ me for my body," I joke and he smiles at me.

"And quite the body it is," he says suggestively as I put on the turtle neck. "I could do without that though," he says, eying the turtle neck with distaste. "Remember when we had that talk about your clothes?" he says and I look at him with humor. "Well, I fucking hate _that_."

"Well, unfortunately for you, it's part of the uniform and I _have_ to wear it," I tell as I put on the skirt and zip it up.

"Another reason to make you quit," he says flatly and I laugh at him as I put on my shoes. "Perhaps you can keep the rest of the uniform for my private viewing pleasure," he says with a wink.

"Everyone would be so disappointed if I quit," I say with a fake pout as I push him back and straddle his waist once we're both dressed again. "I am the best on the squad, you know."

He laughs as he puts his hands on my waist. "The team would be losing a gem in your absence," he says with a pleasant smirk on his face as he leans in to kiss me. "How would the people know how the cheers are _supposed_ to look if they don't have you to show them how they definitely are _not_ supposed to be?"

"That sounded suspiciously like an insult," I tell him as I purse my lips in thought.

"No need to be suspicious," he says with a smile. "It was," he adds and I bite his lower lip as punishment for his remark.

He laughs it off and after a long kiss he pulls back with a sigh. "We should venture out," he says as he looks into my eyes. "People will notice both of us are absent and I don't want to have all the smacking go to waste."

"For sure," I tell him rightly as I nod my head. I stand up and let him put his hand on my waist as we walk towards the door.

"By the way," he says when we get to the door. I look up at him curiously as he puts his hand on the knob. "You hit like a girl."

I pretend to look offended when he opens the door and he peeks his head out to see if the coast is clear. "I should go back to the Great Hall," he says. "If you want, I can have Pansy bring some food for you. I don't think it would be wise for you to go in with me."

"Okay," I say gently because I was hungry and that did sound like a good plan. "See you later."

"Bye," he whispers as he plants a quick kiss against my cheek. We go to part ways, but we both hear the footsteps before we see them. I send shocked looks to the person running right towards us.

To my relief it was Daphne, but she looks quite upset.

"Come quick," he says to Draco in breathless voice. "We need your help."

"Why?" he asks as he follows after her when she begins running down the hall. I look around me for a few moments before I decide to follow. "What happened?"

Daphne doesn't answer and we scurry all the way to Rookwood's old office where Millicent Bulstrode is standing guard in front of the door.

"What is this?" Draco snaps hatefully and when he opens the door to the office, I peek around him to see Dolores Umbridge bound to the office chair, gagged with magic.

Her eyes are on fire when she sees Draco in the doorway and she starts spitting hate from around her gag as she wiggles with her bonds. I cover my mouth in surprise and send a look to Daphne who is looking very bashful and upset.

"What happened?" Draco asks in a dark and chilly voice as we both walk into the room.

The door shuts behind us and I look at the other occupants. It seems that there was a girl's club meeting of some sort because Pansy, Daphne, Millicent, and Ivy were all in the room, looking very nervous as Draco eyes the hated professor.

"She was going to follow you after you left the hall," Pansy says flatly. "I'm sure to spy," she adds. "I knew what you were doing because you had _that _look in your eye," she adds, giving me a look, taking in my messy appearance. I knew what she meant.

She knew he was going to come to me and she knew he wanted sex.

That's fun to think about.

"If she would have caught you together after that display she would have gone right to the Dark Lord," she says and Umbridge grunts around the gag. "After your declarations at your Manor, I knew that he would be extremely suspicious if you were caught with her like that after what you had said."

What did he say?

"I followed her," Daphne says fearfully. "I tried to distract her, but she just kept pushing me aside. She went your dorm first," she says, looking at me. "She found a notebook," she says as Pansy hands it to Draco. "She read through it quickly... she was going to tell him all of your plans, Draco!" she says. "I didn't know what to do so I cursed her and I had them help me bind her after she woke up. Perhaps you can swipe her memory of the incident. Make it like it never happened."

Draco doesn't say anything for a while and I watch his face as he stares at Umbridge with such a cold look in his eyes that I became a bit chilly myself.

"A sharper mind can't hold onto a memory charm like that," he says and then I blush a little when I think of how easily he tampered with my mother's memory. I guess she's not as sharp as Umbridge. "She'll remember eventually," he says, his voice low and dangerous and dark.

It's actually concerning to hear the way he's speaking right now because it's in such stark contrast to how sweet he was just a few moments before.

"Then..." Daphne trails off uncomfortably as she looks at Draco. "Then what should we do?"

He's silent again. This is a side of him I have only glimpsed before and it didn't put me at ease.

After a life time of standing and staring, he finally speaks.

"She has to die," he says and I look at Umbridge.

Her eyes have gotten impossibly wide and I felt enough compassion to feel bad for her.

"Draco," I whisper to get his attention and when he looks at me, his eyes are dead and cold. "Are you sure a memory charm wouldn't work on her?" I say, almost pleadingly because, even though I didn't care for the woman bound to the chair... I didn't know if she deserved to die. "You're so good at those. I'm sure it would work and hold."

He pushes my notebook at me and levels me with a cold glare. "Burn the pages you wrote," he says flatly and I cradle the book to my chest. "You made it very easy for someone to find them and God knows what else you have to expose me."

"I..."

"Shut up," he snaps and I snap my mouth shut, a blush staining my cheeks because of the harsh way he's speaking to me in front of so many. "Go to your room now. Millicent will accompany you."

"Draco..." I trail off again and reach out to touch him to make him see reason.

He puts his hand up to stop me. "Don't touch me," he says and I retract my hand quickly. "Do as I say."

"Come on, Weasley," Millicent snaps at me as she takes my arm.

"What are we going to do?" I hear Daphne say as I head towards the door.

"_We're_ not doing anything," I hear Draco's voice dripping with hatred. "This is your folly. _You_ are going to do it," I hear him sneer and I look over my shoulder once to see Daphne's ashen face staring at the man I had just made love to.

Millicent holds onto my arm the whole way to the common room of our dorm and she pulls me towards the fireplace that's alive and heating the room.

"Well," she says after a few moments. "You heard what he said. Burn the pages."

"Surely he doesn't actually mean to kill her," I say outloud. I mean, I knew what kind of person he was and I knew what he had been doing, but to actually see it like that... the decision he made like he controlled who lived and who died so readily was weighing heavily on my heart.

Millicent sighs loudly like I was stupid and then she grabs the notebook from me and opens the first page. I cringe as she rips it out and throws it into the fire.

"You're so stupid," she says as she tears out a second page. "What do you think he is? Some knightly gentleman?" She throws more pages into the fire as I stare at her with glassy eyes. "Don't act like you don't know his intentions. He would kill all of England to get what he wanted and you know all that very well so don't pretend to be shocked."

"What is it he wants exactly?" I ask with a cry in my voice and she looks at me as she throws the last remaining pages of my notes into the fire.

"He wants," she starts with narrowed eyes. "For the world to be perfect as he thinks it should be."

I don't say anything to that. I just feel very troubled as she shoves the notebook at my chest and marches me up to my room.

She leaves me there by myself and I crawl into my bed with a headache pressing against my mind. I can't really do anything right now. I feel bad that I can't move to help someone in such dire situations... but who would I tell? Every authority figure would go straight to the Dark Lord with the information and then Draco would be found out. He would be killed. Umbridge is an unpleasant woman and God knows what she's been doing as a Death Eater. Does that justify my inaction? Should I go back downstairs and beg Draco to change his mind? I don't know... so I just stay where I'm at. I stare at the wall as the other room mates come into the room, grumbling about losing the Quidditch match and totally unaware of what murder could possibly happening right at this moment.

I stay in that spot for hours.

In the middle of the night, close to three in the morning, I jump when I feel a hand on my shoulder. "It's just me," I hear Daphne say in the darkness and I furrow my brows as she climbs into bed beside me, pulling the curtains around my bed to protect us from the others in the room.

"What are you doing?" I ask softly as she slides under my covers. It sounds like she's crying and I turn my body so I can face her. "Are you alright?"

"I'm sorry," she says with a voice thick with tears. I've never heard her cry before and it kind of threw me off guard. "I shouldn't have let Umbridge enter your room and go through your things. Now Draco is so very mad."

"It's okay," I tell her as I put my hand on her shoulder. "It wasn't your fault. Pansy said she intended to follow us after we left the hall. That is no ones fault but mine and Draco's."

She cries for a few more moments, making loud whining noises and turning her face into my pillow.

I rub her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her. "Did you..." I trail off softly as I think of Umbridge and the thing that Draco had said in her office. "Did you do that to her?" was all I could get out and she shushed me quickly.

"Let's never ever talk about it," she says with a cry as she puts her hand over my mouth. I peel her fingers back. "We must never ever talk about it. It never happened."

I don't say anything to that, but I honor her request and I don't bring it up again.

After a few minutes her sobs die down and she moans into the pillow once more. "Draco is going to be so mad at me for a while. He holds grudges like no one else," she says with misery evident in her voice. "And he's so very mean when he's angry."

"He has no right to blame you," I tell her seriously. "You had no way of knowing what she would find in my room and it's not your job to stop her. You only did what you thought was best... He's lucky, actually, that you chose to follow her. It's actually me he should be mad at... I was the one who just left my things out unguarded."

"Could you tell him that," she whispers hopefully. "Tell him that it wasn't my fault. That I didn't know what else to do. Convince him not to hate me. He's so cruel when he's upset."

"I'll talk to him," I tell her. "But I'm sure after he cools down he'll realize it himself."

She doesn't say anything to that, she just gives me a side hug. "I knew you would be good for him," she says against my hair. "I'm so glad we're friends," she says softly.

She doesn't say anything after that and neither do I. After a while, I think she actually falls asleep and I turn my back on her, trying to find my own space at the edge of the bed so she'll stop cuddling me.

Draco has a plan for everything, even he admitted that. I think I just saw what happens when things don't go according to his well thought out plans and I shiver to think of what he would do if the stakes were raised.

Politics seems like the worst thing for a man like Draco to go into.

_Do you want to be mine always._... now that seemed like a life sentence instead of a romantic declaration of love.

I try not to think about it.

Sometimes I wish someone would clear my mind of the memories I hold. I can't seem to escape them... the Dark Lord was right when he mentioned the prison of the mind. It is the worst kind of hell.

I am sure of it now.


	16. Chapter 16

The castle was ablaze with rumors the week the Dolores Umbridge went missing. I kept my head down and my mouth shut as people gossiped and whispered about where she could be. She left, it was said, during the dinner feast and no one has seen or heard from her since. She left no note and she packed no bags. She even left her wand laying on the desk in her office. It was odd, people said... foul play was suspected. A ghost reported seeing her going up the stairs to the tower sometime around nine, but couldn't be sure where she went after that.

If they only _knew._

I constantly feel sick and when I was interviewed by Snape, questioning me on my whereabouts during the Quidditch feast, I told him that I was upset after getting into a fight with Draco Malfoy. I went for a walk about the castle until late into the night to blow off steam. I never saw Umbridge, I lied, even though I could clearly picture her panicked expression in my mind when Draco said she had to die.

Snape stared at me for a long time in his office, reading my eyes and watching me fidget with an appraising look on his harsh features. After being released from the Headmaster's office, I suddenly felt very nervous. Umbridge was another person who was supposed to look after me and something bad happened to her as well.

The Dark Lord will not be pleased.

I'm worried so deeply about my family now that my depression has seemed to seep into everything that I do.

I can't find myself to be optimistic anymore.

I'm not like Harry.

His rash decisions always seem to reach the best conclusions and he has so much luck engrained in his system that I think he might be made out of the golden luck potion.

I'm stupid.

I try to be a good person but I always seem to do something wrong.

I do _everything_ wrong.

I'm a coward... but when I try to be brave, I just end up making a fool of myself.

My good intentions always seem to fall short and they do nothing but get me, and everyone around me, in the deepest of trouble. Then again, Harry did have the best support system. Dumbledore and countless others kept close watch on him from the time he was small, knowing he would grow up to be such a great hero. Even though he did grow up in the worst of homes, with his abusive aunt and uncle, he was completely loved in our world... not to mention he always has, and always will have, Hermione and Ron by his side. They're the greatest friends anyone could ask for and their talents far out weigh their flaws.

With that thought, I look down the table at Luna who's sitting with Romilda Vane again. I wonder what that feels like, to have friends so close they were willing to die for you a million times over. I'm envious of Harry now, and with another stab to my heart I realize once more that I should have gone with him when he asked. I shouldn't have stayed here at this horrid school with Draco.

Draco...

I felt bad even thinking that thought. I love him so much and I feel like a traitor for even thinking about leaving him. I'm not like him either. My careful plans always end up falling out at the bottom at the last minute. I'm not smart like he is. I'm not smooth. I can't see connections. I can't view the path into the future so effortlessly and so boldly... I can't be okay with making the decision for someone to die.

Die.

I put my spoon down and stare at the soup I haven't been able to eat. I don't know why this is bothering me more than anything else. It's not like death is anything new to me.

"Are you okay, Gin?" Daphne asks with a sunny smile as she nudges my arm.

I nod my head.

She's returned to her happy disposition not long after the night she crawled into my bed bawling her eyes out. Whenever the subject was brought up, she would quickly sour and demand that the subject be changed to a more agreeable topic. '_Let's not talk about dark things'_ she would say with her blond hair a halo about her head. '_Let's be happy_.'

That's easier said than done.

"What's this?" she asks as she pulls something from between the notebook I had lying on the table. I try to grab it from her, but she holds it out of my reach.

"It's my family," I mumble as she looks at the photo. It's the one I had taken from the burrow when Draco gave into my request to take me there.

I should have known right then things were hopeless.

"Who is this?" she asks as she points to someone in the picture.

I crane my neck to see.

"Bill," I tell her softly as I tilt the picture so I can see my older brother a bit better. "He's a curse breaker at Gringotts... was..." I correct myself. She brings the photo closer to her face to give it a good viewing.

"He's good looking," she says with an appraising look in her eyes.

I nod my head. Every girl thinks that about Bill.

"That's Percy," I tell her pointing to the only brother who wears glasses and she makes a face.

"Him. Not so good looking," she says and I shake my head.

"I think he looks fine," I tell her in defense of my proper older brother. Even though I know Percy is perfectly ridiculous, distance has made my heart grow fonder and I will defend him to the death if I have to.

"Twins I know... Ron, I know, obviously," she says, scanning the photo. "Who's this?"

"That's Charlie," I tell her with a little smile on my face as I remember my favorite sibling. "He's two years younger than Bill. After Hogwarts he went to study dragons," I tell her as I remember him and she looks at me, studying my profile. "He had the coolest stories when he came back for the holidays."

Thinking of Charlie makes me sad, and I lick my lips before giving her a fake smile so she doesn't feel bad for me.

"Once he said he found three baby dragons just hatched in a cave. The mother had been killed by poachers and he was able to keep them for few weeks until they were strong enough to fly on their own. Wouldn't it be cool to have a baby dragon?"

"That would be cool," she agrees with a head nod.

"Yeah..." I trail off, letting the depression make me sad again. "It is," I whisper, trying not to over think it.

"You must miss them a great deal."

"I do," I say softly as I try not to let that sharp pain in my heart kill me. "I try not to think about," I admit as I fold up the photo and put it back in my notebook.

If I think about it too much I think I'll just ball up and cry all day long. I have no idea what they're doing... if they're okay... what's happening to them... I would give anything to see them again. Even if all we did was fight and bicker with each other, I would choose that over this life any day.

A silence falls between us and she looks at me as I fiddle around with my notebook.

"I think if I was in your position I would be the saddest girl in the word," she says and I glance at her before nodding.

"So have you had any more letters from your suitor?" I ask quickly to change the subject because I just might cry.

"Of course," she says with and eye roll. "And each one is duller than the next."

This suitor business has been on the forefront of her thoughts since she started corresponding with the man two weeks ago. It's easy to talk about... it keeps me distracted from my own life problems, which seem to be overwhelming at times and it lets her vent.

"What is his name again?" I ask as she takes a drink of pumpkin juice.

"Macnair," she says flatly and I try to remember where I had seen that name again. I can barely recall... "Phillip Macnair. He keeps writing me, of course, but he is the most boring old thing I've ever met."

"Why did you choose him?" I ask curiously and she blinks at me.

"It was a good match," she says with a side shrug.

"But you don't like him?"

She makes a face. "He's... very old and boring."

"But you like older men, do you not?' I attempt to joke as I nudge her shoulder but she looks disgusted. "Do you... Do you not like him?" I whisper. "I thought you had a say in who courted you. Wasn't there someone more agreeable in your folder?"

I didn't get a choice, of course, but everyone else did. I would kill to be in her shoes right about now.

"I chose him, actually," she says as she stuffs some cooked carrots into her mouth.

"Then why do you seem so disgusted about it?"

"He's..." she looks at me and makes a face. "He was the best choice," she says with a head nod like she had to convince herself.

Okay, then.

"But... Oh, Ginny, he is _so_ ugly!" she screams like it was the worst thing in the world. "Not that it matters, in the long run," she adds as she looks around to see if anyone heard her yell. Of course, everyone did and they're all staring at us. "But I will have to look at him and he is just..." she makes a horrid face with her nose scrunched up. "He is a troll."

"Is he nice, at least?" I offer and she rolls her eyes.

"Nice enough," she says with a bitter look on her face. "But he has this horrible bulbous nose. It looks like a potato that has sprouts coming from it."

I almost laugh at the visual, but can't seem to break a smile. She keeps going.

"And he has one eye that veers slightly to the left at all times," she says as she tries to mimic the look. She looks ridiculous and I snort. "It's really distracting!"

"Then why are you letting him court you?" I ask her seriously. "I'm sure there are a million other men in your folder who would be a good match."

"It's just... it's nothing..." she says with a shoulder shrug. "No matter."

I let the conversation die for a moment and then I look across the hall at Draco again. He's tapping his fingers against his glass and staring at Pansy as she says something to him. Phillip Macnair. Why do I know that name and why do I know it has to do with Daphne? Did I see it somewhere? Was it in his folder...

"How are you bonded to Draco?" I ask quickly. Because of the way she's acting about this ugly suitor I have a feeling it has something to do with Draco... and his notes... wasn't there something about Daphne in there... and was it Philip Macnair?

I think it was.

I can recall seeing his picture now. The old man with the large nose and the Death Eater robe. It did have Daphne's name on the back. I can remember that now.

"We shouldn't talk about such things," she says sourly and I frown.

"I would like to talk about it," I say honestly. "Why are you letting that ugly guy court you if you have no interest? Does it have to do with Draco's plan and the bonding? Tell me how everyone is bonded to him."

"I don't want to," she says like a stubborn child and I furrow my brows.

"Please tell me. I would tell you if I knew."

"No," she says as she shakes her head. "You wouldn't."

"What's the big deal? You know I'm bonded to him," I lean in to whisper so no one else can hear. "You know how and why. I think it's only fair that you tell me."

"Ask Draco," she says and I bite the inside of my cheek so I don't snap at her.

"I don't want to ask Draco," I mutter and she gives me a look before turning back to her food.

I sigh loudly.

Draco was upset after the Umbridge thing and it took him a while to forgive me. He would rarely talk to me and his comments were especially nasty if he did. Of course, the sex never stopped, but it was shorter and rougher than before and he wouldn't cuddle with me afterward. It made me feel used, actually, and I hated that feeling.

I hated a lot of things.

I especially hated it when Draco was angry with me. He was my only source of comfort in the world and, even though the sex always felt amazing, I missed him being sweet to me.

I needed _someone_ to be sweet to me, after all.

The more I thought about, the more I realized it _was_ my fault Umbridge had to... go away. It had nothing to do with Daphne not stopping her. It was the fact that she found my notebook so easily and that it had all of Draco's plans clearly listed for anyone who chose to read it. Daphne was my only friend now and I needed to make Draco see that.

He was especially bitter after I told him not to be so mean to her. He spat on about how naïve I was again, and how I never realized it when people where manipulating me. Daphne knew what she had done wrong and it was terrible of her to take advantage of my emotions like she did.

He called me gullible.

It sounded like he described himself and when I told him that he silenced me with a dominant kiss and there was no more talk the rest of the evening. I didn't really mind, actually. I was addicted to Draco's love making and it was the only time I ever felt... _good. _It helps... with the numb depression I feel. It makes me _feel _something, at least.

I look at Draco again as I think about it and he turns away from his friends to find me. He studies my face for a moment and when I think about how intense my orgasm was last night, he smiles a little to himself before winking and turning away. I blush and bring my hand up to my neck because of what I just let him see.

We finally made up yesterday morning, thank God.

When I walked into the room of requirement, he was sitting on one of the white sex couches, reading the news paper. We had already had a heated discussion about Daphne so I didn't want to bring it up again, but I was tired of him being angry with me all the time. I sat down beside him and turned my body into his.

He didn't even look up from the paper.

"Hey," I had said.

That was my lame greeting, but he didn't bother to respond.

"How are you doing?" I pressed with my head cocked to the side and he spared me a little glance.

"I think you know how I'm doing," he answered and I sighed loudly.

He went back to the paper and didn't look away.

A heavy silence fell between us as I studied his sharp profile.

I needed to apologize to him. I had been toying with the idea all week but I just couldn't get it out. I didn't know if I should say sorry to someone who... could make that kind of deadly decision, but I realized that I needed to. For myself more than for him, actually. The truth was, I couldn't stand it when Draco was upset with me no matter what the reason. It made me feel bad. I didn't want him thinking bad things about me and I didn't like the way he looked at me when he was angry.

I wanted him to be nice to me again.

I needed him to be loving because the world was such a scary place for me.

"I'm sorry that Umbridge found my notebook," I had told him softly, honestly. I was sorry. I was so sorry and I wished I wouldn't have written anything down. It just got me into trouble and it hurt people around me. "I just left it in my trunk. I didn't even think anyone would find it."

"Of course you didn't," he snapped as he folded over his paper and set it on the table. "Because you never think."

My cheeks burned and I slumped back.

"Did you burn all the pages like I said?" he asked flatly as he stood up and he walked over to the fake fireplace against the wall that burned with purple flames.

"Yes," I said as I started picking at my fingers. "Did you have to..." I trailed off, not sure of what I wanted to say as he put his hand on the mantle. I remember staring at his strong back and thinking he was just so handsome. How could someone so handsome be so deadly? "Did you have to do that to her? I mean, I've seen you do the memory charm a million times. You even charmed my mother."

I looked at the paper folded on the desk. A photo of Umbridge in that garish pink sweater was smiling at me from the page. It made me feel sick and I looked at Draco again as I tried to understand why it had to happen that way.

"You're so smart, Draco. You're such a good wizard. I don't understand why a memory charm wouldn't work."

I was waiting for him to change the subject, or to approach me for a violent shag session like I was used to... but he didn't do either of those things and it surprised me.

"I said that a sharp mind won't take a charm like that," he replied and I felt insulted for my mother when I remembered how easily he swiped her memories.

"My mom's not stupid," I told him in a defensive voice. "I'm convinced you didn't have to kill that woman."

"You're convinced," he said nastily as I stood up because I just knew it was going to turn into a fight. Draco always won our fights and I didn't want that to happen again. He finally looked at me after a brief pause and the purple flames of the fire reflected in his eyes. "Do you think I just go around killing people as sport?" he asked sharply and I realized my comment was a little rash.

I'm trying not to be that way anymore.

He sighed loudly after a while and ran a hand through his hair.

"I can tell by looking into a mind whether or not it will hold," he said seriously. "It has nothing to do with intelligence. It has to do with the way the mind processes thoughts and feelings. For instance, I couldn't swipe Blaise's memory from seeing you naked even though I wanted it gone but I could easily make Cho Chang believe it was Tuesday if I wished and she is a smart witch."

I blushed again at the thought of Zabini and I crossed my arms over my chest protectively.

"Umbridge is the same way. It may have held for a day, maybe a week, but when she remembered... I would be dead."

I sat back down and stared at my knees for a while before I found the courage to speak again.

The conversation about Umbridge was going nowhere because sometimes talking to Draco was like talking to a totally convincing and intelligent brick wall.

"You don't have to be so mean to Daphne," I told him again for the millionth time. I knew he hated it when I brought it up, but I knew it was wrong of him to be so one sided.

I did promise her I would speak to him and I couldn't tell her the truth every time he snapped at me about it. I thought that I could get through to him, though. I wanted to bring her some good news because Draco was constantly blowing her off. I feared she might develop a nervous tick from it and he seemed ready to talk about things... kind of...

"I think she did you a great favor by following Umbridge to my room," I told him... again... saying the rehearsed words I had been practicing in my mind. "You should be grateful that she stopped her before she went to the Dark Lord."

"Grateful?" he bit that word out like it hurt him to say it. "You think I should be grateful that she forced my hand on a situation like that? It's her fault Umbridge is gone, Ginny. I will not be grateful for that."

"But Draco, I don't think you're being fair," I told him...again... trying to be level headed about it. "If you have to be mad at someone, be mad at me. I'm the one that had the notebook with your plans in it."

"Would you rather I take it out on you?" he asked me with a brow raised.

"You're mad at me already," I mumbled, flicking him a quick glance before looking down at my knees again. "It's obvious." I exhaled slowly as he eyed me. "I just think you should try to be a little bit nicer to Daphne." I rested my elbow against the arm rest and put my head against my forehead. I was tired. I was tired of everything. "She's so nice and you're being mean to her for no reason."

"You're so gullible, Ginny," he repeated in frustration as he ran his hand over his face.

"No, I'm not," I had told him as I brought my hand down to glare at him. "Stop calling me that."

"You think Daphne Greengrass was having all those midnight chats with you because she wants to be your best friend forever and ever?" he asked, using a condescending voice that made my eyes narrow. "She just wanted you to talk to me," he said as he rolled his eyes and turned to the fire again. "I don't know how many times I have to tell you that before you understand. I'm tired of talking about it."

I shook my head then because I honestly couldn't believe that. No one can fake crying like she did... or... I don't like to think they could. I liked Daphne. She was my friend and in the dark corner of my mind I had a brief thought of Draco trying to isolate me from true relationships in my life so I would rely on him more... but I banished that thought away. It was almost too evil.

"Well," I snapped hatefully. "Being your wife should have some benefits," I spit out and he glared at me for a few moments before the corner of his mouth turned in a smirk.

"Spoken like a true Malfoy," he said flatly as he knocked his knuckles against the mantle.

"I'm not a Malfoy," I told him and he laughed.

"Your thought process is ridiculous," he replied. He started walking his way back towards me then. I could tell he wasn't half as angry with me as he was from the start. "I'm sick of having this redundant conversation with you. It ends now, is that clear?" he said sternly and I exhaled slowly.

"This isn't even a conversation. You just talk down to me all the time," I admitted to him and he narrowed his eyes slightly.

"I don't talk down to you. I can be just as stubborn as you are and I'm not moving my thoughts on this matter. I want you to understand that so you can save your energy for something else."

"Why do you have to be such a dick?" I said with out a thought and he raised his brows.

"Excuse me?"

"You're acting like a jerk," I told him boldly and he tilted his head to the side.

"I think you misunderstand what you're fighting for right now, _darling_," he said. His voice dripped with sarcasm. "You want me to stop being mean to your friend? Why doesn't she grow up and tell me that herself instead of using my feelings for you to manipulate everyone? She knows I favor you and she's trying to use that to her own benefit."

I went to reply, but he cut me off sharply.

"The thing with Umbridge had to be done. There is no other way. If she didn't die, then we would probably be dead by now. You have this warped view on what is right in your head right now, but just trust me and my decisions."

"But..." What did he say? I wasn't even sure and I frowned as I tried to make sense of it.

"But nothing," he snapped and I frowned.

"Stop being so terrible to me," I told him flatly and he clenched his fist for a moment before facing me.

"I'm angry, Ginny," he admitted and I nodded.

Obviously.

"The reason why I am so mad at Daphne is because she knows better," he said, walking towards me. "I'm irritated that you left your notebook just hanging out in your trunk for anyone to find, but I can understand you wanting to know what I've been doing. I haven't exactly been forthcoming with you so I can't blame you for that. Greengrass should have known better than to curse Umbridge and leave her bound to a chair while still conscious. There were a thousand other things she could have done, but she made this mess by being an idiot."

I studied his face as he tried to explain it to me with a strangled calm voice, like he was attempting to use his words and not his fists.

"I was under the microscope before, but now I have officially earned the suspicion of a very suspicious man. The Dark Lord is being backed into a corner and that's when he's at his most dangerous. It's not just me this effects. It my whole family, everyone close to me," he added as he sat on the coffee table across from me and he reached out to put some hair behind my hair. "Now, to take the pressure off of me, I have to find a scapegoat for my transactions," he said and that made me furrow my brows. "That's another life ruined, Gin, just because she didn't use her fucking head."

"What do you mean a scapegoat?" I whispered even though I had a good idea. "Who will you choose?"

"I haven't decided who's expendable to me yet," he said flatly and I bit my lower lip. "I hope it won't come to that."

"It wouldn't be like..." I trailed off, thinking of Daphne. "Like anyone I know... like my friend or anything, will it?" I questioned and he looked over my face before touching my neck.

"Don't worry about it. Let me do that for you."

"But... You won't... choose me for that would you?" I asked carefully and he actually laughed.

"Of course not," he smiled at me. "We're at the top of the food chain, babe. Nothing bad happens to us."

I wish I could take those words to heart.

"I have something for you," he said as he reached into his pocket.

I was still confused and a little bit angry, so I wasn't too thrilled by his happier mood.

"What wonderful thing to you have to give me now?" I asked sarcastically and he paused for a moment before smiling.

"You are being awfully catty this morning." He looks me over. "If I had lower self-esteem I think I would be hurt."

"Luckily for me you don't have low self-esteem," I told him, almost laughing at the thought of Draco being self conscience about _anything._

"Too true," he smirked before becoming rather serious and leaning forward, putting his hand on my knee. "Don't be mad at me, sweetheart. I'm tired of feeling upset over this. Let's just let it go, yes?" he said, his eyes looking so warmly into mine.

"Yes," I answered before I even thought and when he smiled I knew I would be doomed to a life of agreeing with him just because I loved him too damn much.

He pulled back and smirked, showing me the small vial in his hand. "This," he says as he hands it to me. "Is for you."

"Oh, birth control," I smiled at him with a fake excited voice. "How _romantic_."

"If you don't wish to take it," he said as he went to grab it. "I can just take it back."

I hold it out of his reach. "Let's not get too hasty," I told him with a smile, trying to be normal and not sad all the time.

Sex with Draco was something that could put me in a good mood, honestly, and I was pleased he was being playful with me. I thought he might even hold me for a little bit afterwords.

It was pathetic, but sometimes I just really needed to be held.

"I could have used this yesterday," I told him when I remembered how, after another heated fight about him being overly mean to people, he had me bent over one of the white shag couch and he came all over my back when he was finished.

"You were the one who wanted me to pull out," he countered and I gave him a look that he smiled at.

I looked at the vial again. "I don't want to get knocked up. My boyfriends would be disappointed."

"Pretending to be a slag is not endearing," he said seriously and I laughed before uncorking the lid and downing it quickly.

"Who's pretending?" I joked and he raised an eyebrow.

"If you would like to give me a demonstration on your abilities, I will be more than willing to oblige you," he had said with a smirk.

"I'm sure you would."

"In any case," he added. "I have something else you might like. I received some news from my father that I think might interest you."

"Good news from your father?" I questioned sarcastically as he moved to sit beside me on the couch. The cushion sunk with his weight, making my body slide closer to his. I watched him curiously as he removed a letter from his pocket. "I am on the edge of my seat to hear it."

"You don't want to know?" he teased as he held the letter in front of me. "I could always keep the information from you if you find the source so distasteful." I rolled my eyes. "Okay," he said as he retracted the letter. "If you don't want to hear about your mother than I might as well just burn this letter."

"Wait," I said quickly as I pounced on him and grabbed the letter. "My mother?" I said quickly as I unfolded it and scanned the page. The handwriting was small and clear and I skimmed the first few paragraphs that talked about a hunting trip that was planned for Draco's winter break and there... at the end...

_Unfortunately Binns will be out of commission for the retreat. He has been placed at a post in Knockturn Alley where blood traitors released from Azkaban are under constant surveillance. _

"You think my Mom is part of this group?" I said hopefully as I started biting my nails.

"Think?" he said as I skimmed the line again, trying to find more of a clue. It didn't say anything about my mother, but the implication was there. "I know," he said and then I felt him pull my hand away from my mouth. "Stop biting your nails," he said flatly. He's always scolding me for it, but I could hardly care. "Does that news please you?"

I nodded my head. "I could go see her," I said and then my eyes lit up at the idea. "Draco, you could take me!" I told him in excitement as I got up on my knees. "Through that passage in the boy's common room. You could take me."

He looked at me and I knew he was going to say no. I could just tell by the way he was staring at me.

"You forget things so easily," he tapped the letter again. "She is under constant surveillance and you know you're on a tight leash here." I sat back on my heels and frowned again. "Besides," he said flatly. "That's how I was getting to all my meetings and the Dark Lord knows that," he snapped bitterly, but he didn't elaborate further. "But," he added and I looked at him. "I could probably give her a letter during the Hogsemede trip next weekend."

I had forgotten about the trip. I wasn't allowed to go. Besides the obvious fact that I have no one to sign my permission form this year... I doubted the Dark Lord would want me so out in the open where I could run away if I had the chance... not that I would with my family in their dire situation...

"You don't think..."

"Don't think what?" he asked after I trailed off and I gave him a worried look.

"He told me about what happens to the re-education students. The things that he does to them," I said repressing a chill. "Do you think that... that they would do... or did that... to my mom or my other family members?" I whispered when the thought washed over me.

If they can do it to young teens, they could do it to threat level red prisoners. Another thing I have to worry about.

"I don't think so," he said as he reached out to touch my neck. I loved it when he touched me and I welcomed it. "It's called leverage, my love, and you're the golden goose."

I wish I wasn't.

"Would you still love me if I wasn't?" I asked softly and he gave me a little smile.

"I wish you had more confidence in me," he said and I felt guilty so I nodded my head, letting him lean in to kiss me. He was so good at making me feel guilty and making me realize how foolish I was being.

It made me think of my Mother and father and the relationship they always had together. It was nothing like mine and Draco's and I couldn't decide if it was because we loved each other more intensely or more unhealthily... it was a toss up I wasn't all together comfortable with.

That thought brought up another series of uncomfortable realizations.

"Come here," he whispered after a few moments as he laid back against the cushions. He pulled me to him and I curled beside his body so we were facing each other.

I tucked my hands under my cheek as I stared at him.

He stared right back until I looked away.

"I've been thinking," I told him after a lifetime of laying there against him.

"More thoughts?" he said with a raised brow before putting his hand on my hip.

"Yes, I've been thinking about that talk we had," I said seriously as I looked at his lips. "On the Quidditch stands last week."

"What about it?" he asked as he moved in to place a gentle kiss against my jaw.

"I don't want to just sit on the sidelines of my life."

He stopped kissing me.

"I love you... I-I can see a future with you," I told him as he slowly pulled back so he could see my face. "But I want to feel like it's my life too."

"Okay," he said and then he put hair over my shoulder so he could kiss my neck.

He wasn't listening to me so I pushed him back.

"Where does my family fit into your plan?" I asked him. I thought a lot about that too. "I mean, you hate Ron, but he'll be the uncle to your future two possibly three children," I told him and he narrowed his eyes. "I love my family."

"You hardly think about your family," he said and I felt ashamed when I realized it was the truth.

"They mean so much to me," I said softly. "Like you mean so much to me." I reached out to touch him. I needed him to understand. "I want everyone I love to survive this," I had told him. "I want my family to survive this. I want you to get along with my brothers and I want..."

"What?" he asked with a brow raised as he looked at me.

"I want my Dad to like you." I didn't realize how important it was to me until I said it and I covered my mouth because I didn't want to cry. I always cry. I've become annoying. "And I want... to have a say in my own life."

"You always have a say," he said flatly but I think we both knew that wasn't true.

"Okay," I told him as I put my hand down. I didn't want to further that conversation right then. He'd just talk me out of it, or around it. "That's, that's just what I was thinking about."

We laid in silence for a while and then he looked at me for a few long moments before leaning in to kiss me. "You are in luck," he said with a charming smile. "Parents usually love me."

I smiled at his meaning and ran a hand through his hair. "Even my parents?" I questioned with a brow raised and he smirked.

"I have never backed down from a challenge."

He made me happy when he was being sweet and I kissed him again. We continued on like that for a while... just laying against each other and talking softly to each other. It was actually really nice. When we parted, he tucked some hair behind my ear and reminded me to write a letter to my mother for him to take with him.

That earned him another long kiss.

Daphne nudges me again and I blink out of the memory. When I look at her she has a piece of corn stuck to her front tooth. "Does it look like I have a gold tooth?" she asks and I laugh a little.

"It looks like you have a rotten corn tooth," I answer and she smiles before eating it with a laugh.

I go back to staring at my soup and then I chance a glance up to the other table where Draco is sitting with his friends. Draco's not looking at me, but someone else is and when I make eye contact with Blaise, I turn away quickly.

"Will I get to see anyone over break?" I ask Daphne quietly as I poke at my soup. "Will I be able to see you?" I question and she shrugs.

"I suspect you would. I think Blaise's mom will use you as her one way ticket into every high society party."

I frown at that. "Why have I never seen Ruth before?" I question seriously. "If she's Zabini's mom, I think I should have seen her before. I know I would have remembered her," I add because she was that beautiful.

"That's because you've only been to events at Malfoy Manor," she says with a smile like she was divulging a juicy secret. "And Ruth never goes to things at Malfoy Manor."

"Why?" I question softly and it was the right thing to ask because Daphne leaned in close.

"Oh, it's something terrible, I am sure. Ruth and Draco's mother used to be the best of frenimies, of course," she adds with a head nod like it was common knowledge. "They did everything together, even though Mrs. Malfoy always thought Blaise's mom was a little _less than_, if you know what I mean."

"I guess," I answer and she continues.

"No one particularly liked her in the Malfoy family because she married Blaise's Dad, who was best friends with the old Mr. Malfoy."

"Draco's dad?" I ask in confusion and she shakes her head.

"Draco's Grandfather. Carmine Zabini was an old man by the time Ruth married him. He was already retired as a healer and Ruth was always seen as a gold digger. She had the title," she adds. "But no money. The Zabini family was loaded. Carmine died seven years into the marriage and things started turning sour after that because they said she poisoned him," she whispers like others were listening. "With the help of her lover."

This sounds very dramatic.

"The relationship was always shaky, but something big happened a few years ago and Narcissa Malfoy blacklisted Ruth from a majority of high society functions. It is a horrible thing to get on the bad side of a Malfoy and Narcissa runs society with an iron fist. No one knows what happened, but I bet Ruth is just dying to get a hold of you," she says as she wiggles her brows at me. "That means she _has_ to be welcomed back into society. I bet the Dark Lord didn't even know the history there!" she says with a laugh. "Ruth's family went bankrupt funding the Dark Lord during the first war. It completely ruined her family after the he vanished the first time."

I doubt he would care even if he did know.

"That's sounds like a lot of drama," I say and Daphne laughs.

"I know!" she smiles. "Isn't it brilliant?"

I don't say anything to that.

I look back at Blaise, trying to imagine him as a boy with an ancient father and a beautiful mother who was possibly a murderer...murderess... I'm not sure the proper name, actually.

"Ginny," Daphne whispers to get my attention and I turn away from Blaise. Her happy smile falls flat as she looks at me. "Don't do anything with Zabini," she says and I would have laughed if she wasn't so serious. "Over break," she continues. "Don't let him get close to you."

I snort at the thought. "I don't like him that way... in fact, I don't even like him at all," I say as I take a sip of the soup. It burns and I crinkle my nose before putting the spoon down.

"I know," she says seriously. "But... everyone has an agenda and Blaise...he... he _lies,_" she says. "He _lies_ all the time. He'll lie about anything to get what he thinks he wants."

"I have nothing worth having," I mutter.

"You're wrong," she says, her eyes looking into mine. "You have everything."

I swallow and turn away.

"I'm stronger than that," I tell her with an eyeroll. "He can lie all he wants, it will have no effect on me."

"It works on everyone," she says. "He's so good at it."

I chance a glance at Blaise and Draco again.

I know Zabini is possibly the most beautiful boy I've ever seen, but I was more attracted to Draco. When I have fantasies, they didn't have a sexy naked Blaise in them, they have my boyfriend and I don't see that changing any time soon. No matter what lies he tells me.

"I love Draco," I say honestly.

"I hope that's true," she whispers.

"It is true," I tell her seriously and I even put my hand on her arm so she'll take me seriously.

She nods once and I go back to looking at Draco.

He looks up and smiles at me.

Everyone is going to Hogsmeade tomorrow and I give him a fond smile back because I've already given him the letter for my mother. I hope she's alright. It took me days to figure out what to write to her. I didn't know what to say, but after the first few hard sentences I found my hand whipping through stories and thoughts, and hopes... I wrote six pages and when I handed it all to Draco he raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything.

He's not eating much either and I frown in worry until the intercom comes on and drowns out the hall, jumping me out of my daze.

"Attention," says a female voice over the loud speaker and we all stop talking to listen to the announcement. "Ginevra Weasley is to report to the Headmaster's office immediately. Ginevra Weasley to the Headmaster's office," the voice repeats before beeping off and it feels like a thousand eyes turn towards me at the same time.

I put my head down and gather up my things before scurrying out of the room. What now? I dread to know as I walk the long halls towards Snape's office. What terrible thing did I do and what is waiting for me there? I've been trying to keep my toe in line like he wanted. What if they found out about my involvement with Umbridge? What if he hurts my family?

I'm a nervous wreck by the time I reach the head master's office and I start biting my nails as I wait to be let in.

Snape is waiting for me when the door opens and I tuck hair behind my ears nervously as he tells me to sit down.

"Let me get right to the point," he says as he steeples his fingers. I put my bag down and carefully slip into the seat across from his imposing desk. "Every person who has been put in the way of watching you this year has not ended up in a very pleasing condition," he says and I swallow hard and look at my lap, not wanting to be blamed for anything else.

Please don't hurt my family. Please don't hurt my family. I keep repeating that thought in my mind, willing it to happen.

"The Dark Lord is very concerned about it, as I am sure you know," he says, eying me closely as I fiddle with my fingers. "And it has also been brought to his attention that you do not have a familiar."

"A familiar?" I whisper softly and he nods sharply as I look at his dark eyes.

"So the Dark Lord saw fit to combine two issues into one," he says as he walks over to the closet at the back of the room and he opens it up.

My insides freeze over when a large green snake slithers from the confines and heads straight towards me. "I don't understand," I whisper as the creature winds it's body around my chair. I swallow hard again and try not to shudder in disgust when I feel the scales against my ankle.

I'm too scared to move. All I want to do is jump on the desk to get away from the snake and scream until someone kills it.

"Nagini is a favorite pet of our Lord," he says and I watch the creature as it moves about the room like a green river on the carpet. "I think you will find her a very intelligent and attentive companion." I glance down at the snake and make a face. "I will warn you that the Dark Lord can easily see through Nagini's eyes as he does his own. I would remain to my studies if I was you."

"But... what do I do with it?" I ask as it's tongue flicks against the air. I don't want to be by it. It freaks me out and I hate it. "I-I don't want it," I say seriously, trying not to freak out. "I don't like snakes."

"You seemed rather fond of her at the Malfoy Halloween dinner," he points out.

I was under the influence then. I would never EVER pet a snake if I was in my right mind.

I shake my head. "I don't know how to care for a snake. I don't want it. Can't I have a cat?" I plead and he shakes his head.

"You don't need to do anything," he says. "She is more than capable of taking care of herself. Also, I doubt that your room-mates in the girl's tower would appreciate the kind of familiar your are requiring today," he says, motioning to the snake. "You'll be moving to a more private room."

"I... what?" I say in confusion and he blinks slowly for a moment before continuing.

"Professor Carrow is to show you your new lodging."

"But..."

"Just a little advice," he says, leaning forward to address me closely. "Do not do anything in front of this snake that you would not like the Dark Lord to see," he says and I look at the snake again. I might have a panic attack. "She is to be your constant companion, so be respectful."

"What if it bites me?" I whisper and he shakes his head.

"Nagini is not a normal snake," he says as he sits back in his chair. "She is more intelligent than most of the students here," he adds as he makes a sweeping motion with his hand. "And older than most as well. She will not do anything she should not."

I gulp hard and shake my head. I don't want this stupid scary snake following me around all the time!

He presses a button on his desk and Carrow walks in, glaring at me with beady eyes .

"Go with Professor Carrow," Snape says, waving a dismissive hand. "I think you'll find all your belongings already transferred."

"I..."

"Goodbye, Miss Weasley."

"But..."

Carrow puts her hand on my shoulder and I let myself get pulled up. I don't know what to do, so I just follow like a child and I nearly start crying when I hear the snake slithering behind me. We walk down an abandoned hallway and when we reach the end of the hall, Carrow pushes a random door open.

"Here's your new room," she says as I look around with a cold feeling settling on my heart.

It's barely bigger than a broom closet. I look at the small bed and the equally small desk against the wall with trepidation in my heart. The walls are stone, as well as the floor, and there are no windows.

It's dark and the few candles along the walls hardly help.

"There are no windows," I point out as I spot a round basket in in the corner, full of pillows. When the snake slides towards it I realize what it is and I try to hold back tears again.

"You don't need them," Carrow says from the doorway as Nagini slithers into her bed.

"What about my privacy?" I ask and she raises a brow as I look at the snake.

"The ladies bathroom is right down the hall and besides," she says as she taps her fingers in midair where the door should be. "You and your familiar are the only creatures the room with allow to enter."

"Now one else?" I say with a worry as I look at the snake, curling up in a wicker basket in the corner.

"Who else would you need?"

"What about my friends?" I ask worriedly and Carrow laughs.

"Nagini will accompany you to your classes," she says and I feel like I might throw up. "She will take time to hunt in the forbidden forest, but I wouldn't count on her being absent from your side for long. She takes her tasks very seriously, you see, and she would love a reason to... discipline you," Carrow says with a twinkle in her evil eye. "She has a taste for human flesh."

"Human flesh?" I repeat softly.

"Enjoy your time with your new friend," she says with an evil laugh and I make a face. "Goodnight Weasley," she says before closing the door.

I guess she's being so mean because I cursed her. Yes, that's probably it.

That's when I see the hole in the door, just the size for the snake and I sit down on my bed and cross my arms as the snake moves about the room.

This is like a nightmare.

A horrible, horrible nightmare.

I stare at the snake and I've never felt more like a prisoner of my own life.

I bring my legs up to my chest and I rest my chin on my knees as I stare at the snake named Nagini. I don't sleep. I don't move. I just stare at the creature and when it cocks it's ugly head to look at me I could swear that more intelligent eyes were looking back at me.

I hate my life.

* * *

I'm losing my mind.

I can't sleep. I'm constantly paranoid that Nagini is going to slide into my bed and... I don't know... touch me... that I can't even get comfortable enough to lay down.

I hate that fucking snake.

It follows me everywhere. The only time I'm by myself is when I'm in the loo or during random classes when she leaves to hunt poor souls in the forbidden forest. No one wants to talk to me. No one wants to talk to the freakish girl who's getting followed by a snake and I can't say that I blame them. Daphne approaches me sometimes, but she's afraid of snakes so every time Nagini gets close she practically runs away.

People literally run from me now.

I haven't had a chance to talk to Draco yet. To see if he saw my mother... or give her my letter. I miss him. I'm lonely and I want to talk to someone, but I can't because she is always there... right by my side, freaking everyone out.

I _hate_ this snake.

As I think that, she slithers under the table and curls around my feet. I want to stab her with my quill and leave her to die.

That's how much I hate her.

I'm in the library. Of course, no one is by me. There are a few students on the other side of the room but that's about it and every once and a while someone will look at me and give me a face like it was my fault I had a snake with me.

I fantasize about killing her.

It's morbid, really, how mean my thought's have gotten, but I don't care.

I'm fairly certain that she can't read because if she could she would probably be concerned with my reading material.

Care of magical creatures has become my best friend.

I want to know how to charm this snake to make it leave me alone.

I think I've found a spell to confound her. It might give me enough time to talk to Draco one of one. I feverishly write down notes from the book, all about how to charm reptiles and how much magic to use on one as large as her.

She hisses at something and I kick her side. I don't even care if she bites me and she hisses again at my foot.

I hate this snake.

I pack up my books and fling the bag over my shoulder. I don't even bother to wait on her as I start heading towards the Great Hall for dinner. She follows, of course. She always follows and I glare at her when we go inside because everyone hates her as well. And because of that they hate me because they think it's my fault she is constantly around, scaring everyone.

It is my fault, in a way, I guess so it's not far off mark.

I sit by myself at the end of the half blood table and I load up my plate as I think about the spell I'm going to test out tonight. It will knock her out for three hours if I do it correctly but I don't want to take my chances. I only need an hour or so to talk to Draco.

Draco.

An idea hits me and I reach into my bag again and pull out a blank sheet of paper and my quill. I scribble down a quick note and then look across the way to Daphne who's sitting by Pansy and Millicent.

I wave at her.

She waves back.

I shake my head and wave at her again. I'm not waving to say hi, stupid girl, I'm waving so she'll come to me.

She takes one look at the snake by my feet before shaking her head and saying sorry. I slump my shoulders and turn to Pansy. She's not afraid of snakes and when I make the same motion, she raises her brows before standing up and walking towards me.

Ugh, thank god.

"Hey," I whisper when she's close as I write _Give to Draco_ on top of the folded letter. "How's it going?" I ask as I pass it to her.

"Good?" she says as she raises a brow and looks at the note.

"I just wanted to see how your Hogsmeade trip was," I lie as I point to the letter and then put a finger over my mouth so she won't say anything in front of the snake that makes me paranoid.

"It was good," she says, nodding in understanding as she pockets the note. "How is your new familiar?" she asks, glancing at the snake who's poking it's head out from under the table to watch now.

"It's fine," I lie with a fake smile and she nods before walking back to her table.

I eat my dinner because I need to eat. Because if I don't eat I'll die. I've already lost so much weight this year. Not the good kind of weight loss, but the kind that makes me look sick and unhealthy and I have to be strong. I need to survive this. Long enough for Harry, or Draco, or anyone else to fix this.

After dinner I go back to my lonely room and I light the candles with my wand as my companion slithers in behind me. I glance at her as I go to my writing desk and I take out my homework to complete. Since Nagini has been with me I've become the best of students. All my homework is done well and on time and I proof read all of it on my own even without Draco's assistance.

I'm officially a nerd.

After I finish up a potions essay and my configuration assignment, I tuck them away in my folder and then take out the notes I had taken from the library. I look them over and then I look at Nagini curled in the corner, watching me.

"Do you like being a snake?" I ask because I have no one else to talk to. I might as well talk to her.

She raises her head, but, of course, says nothing. I purse my lips and look down at the notes again.

"You know," I say as I take out my wand. "There's that old legend about how snakes were made. They say snakes used to have feet like a lizard," I say as I stand up with my wand in one hand and my notes in the other. "But an unfortunate snake scared a powerful witch so badly, that she cursed the creature so it would have to slither on it's belly for all eternity. The curse was so powerful that it stuck," I say as my eyes skip over the words of the spell. "Do you believe you're cursed, Nagini?" I ask as I lift my wand.

I do the spell and a jet of light shoots from my wand and hits her right between the eyes.

She freezes for a moment, and then her neck falls, resting against her curled up body. I watch carefully as her eyes shut and I smile a little to myself. I go over to her after a few moments and poke her with my wand. She doesn't move and I nearly laugh. I wait for a while until I'm sure she's knocked out and then look at the clock.

Just on time.

I practically run out of the room and sprint down the halls towards the room of requirement. I stop and walk fast when I past other students so I don't look suspicious, but then I start running again once they're out of the way.

"Where are you running to?" Someone stops me with a jolt and I screech to a stop in front of Blaise Zabini.

When I open my mouth to retort, he taps his prefect badge.

"I'm on patrol right now," he says with a glint in his eyes. "I'm in charge."

"Get out of my way," I snap at him as I move to go around him but he slides in front of me to block the hall. "Move."

"I enjoy it when you get so flustered like this."

"Oh, shut up!" I yell at him because I'm on a time crunch. "Get out of the way. I'm going to meet Draco."

That changed his mood. He slid to the side to let me pass and I glared at him before going on my way.

"You won't always be running _towards_ him," he says so softly I barely hear it.

I don't even care and I start running again when I'm sure he's out of the way.

"Did you run the whole way here?" Draco asks when I open the door and I run over to him right away, my heart pumping with adrenalin.

I jump on his lap and kiss him quickly.

He smiles.

"How ever did you get away from your new babysitter?" he asks as I loosen his tie and kiss his jaw.

"I cursed her," I say quickly. "With a spell I got from a Care of Magical Creatures book. Who knew that class had a purpose?" I ask and he laughs. "Were you able to to give the letter to my mother?" I ask him as I unbutton a few buttons on his shirt so I can put my hand on his chest.

It just calms me down. I don't know why.

"I did," he says and I kiss him again.

"Did you see her? Is she okay? Does she looks taken care of?"

"I didn't get a chance to see her," he says and I pull back to give him a questioning look. "I had to quickly stuff the letter through the door, but I didn't see her. I'm sorry," he says and I nod my head.

"Thank you," I tell him. "For doing that for me. I'm sure it wasn't easy."

"There wasn't much to it," he says casually. "How's living with a snake?"

"Terrible."

I tell him everything, about how she keeps me awake at night and the weird little room we have to share. The whole time, he just kept creeping his hand up my thigh until he finally reached under my skirt.

I ignored it.

"I hate her," I end up saying after telling him everything and he nods his head.

"He's spying on you," he says seriously as his hand slips under my tights and knickers. "The Dark Lord," he confirms and I nod my head when he starts petting me. "Do you know why?" he ask with a brow raised.

"Because I'm the golden goose?" I ask as I bite my lower lip and he nods his head.

"Yes," he says with a head nod. I arch my back a little. "And Potter is almost finished with his work," he says with light in his eyes. "If I didn't know any better, I would think the Dark Lord was nervous," he says with a little smile.

Nervous.

I'm nervous. "I should go back," I tell him softly as I attempt to pull his hand away from me, but he's stronger and it doesn't work. "I'm not sure how powerful my curse is. I don't want Nagini waking up with out me there."

Stupid Zabini took up some of my precious time as well.

I glare when I think of him.

Draco's fingers don't let up and he starts to kiss my neck again "Can you do this again?" he asks with a brow raised. "Knock her out to see me?"

I nod my head with a little smile and turn to kiss him. "If this works, I suspect I'll be using that curse a lot."

"Good," he says pushing his fingers inside of me and I inhale deeply.

"Wait, Draco, I think I should go," I tell him worriedly even though I don't want to. I try to pull his hand away again, and he lets me. "I can stay longer next time. When I'm sure my curse will hold," I tell him and he nods his head, letting me stand up.

I go to walk to the door with Draco trailing behind me.

"One more thing," he says as he grabs me and pushes me against the wall.

I laugh. "I have to go," I tell him with a smile as he kisses my cheek.

"I'm sure your curse will hold a bit longer," he says as he actually _rips_ my tights.

I gasp.

"I wanted to talk to you about this," he says as he brings his hands up to my school shirt.

"What about it?" I ask as runs his hands over my breasts.

"Are you aware that you had your shirt halfway unbuttoned all the way through dinner," he says as I look down at my shirt. The three top buttons are undone, but that's it. "Don't do this anymore," he says seriously and I give him a look. "If you decide to be so unclothed, then at least wear a shirt underneath."

I laugh, but he just glares down at me.

"Wait," I say with a brow furrowed. "You're being serious," I say flatly as I let my smile fall.

"Of course I am," he says as he takes it upon himself to unbutton my shirt the rest of the way. "I could see your bra every time you moved. Did you want everyone to look at you?"

I blush at the thought.

"Oh," is all I say with a frown as he takes off his shirt and start unbuckling his belt. "I didn't realize you could see my bra," I mutter and he kisses me.

"Now you know," he says before lifting me up.

Of course, I was already ready for him so he could easily make me his again. He was so good at that.

"You don't seem to mind that I'm showing my bra now," I tell him with a laugh as he slams me against the wall and I hold onto his shoulders for balance.

"If I had it my way, I would be the only person who could ever look at you."

"That sounded weird and unhealthy," I tell him with a smile because I think he's joking. I'm sure he's kidding...

"I don't care," he says with a growl and a hard thrust.

I let out a little yell and grip him a bit tighter. "I think you need to calm down," I tell him, half joking as I kiss his neck.

"I can not wait until all this bullshit is over," he says, leaving an open mouthed kiss against my shoulder. "I think I'll take off a whole month just so I can fuck you at my leisure."

I snort in laughter and kiss his lips. "You act like I don't have a life."

"You shouldn't. I'd chain you to the bed if I had to."

"Of course you would," I tell him with an eye roll. "You dominant beast."

"Nice guys finish last," he tells me, holding onto my hip with crushing strength. I know it's going to bruise later but I can't find it in me to care.

After a few moments, he furrows his brows and his jaw clenches... then he shakes his head.

"Fuck," he says before throwing me against one of the couches.

The cushions feel better on my back and I welcome the surprise as he continues to drill into me, never missing a beat. He's on fire right now and I smile at the thought as I start to sweat from his closeness. I stare at the ceiling as he claims me for the millionth time and I muse over it's content. It has a swirling pattern that looks like the night sky and I run my hand up his back as I study the colors.

"Damn it..." I hear him whisper against my ear in frustration. He tilts my hips up and start slamming into me so hard that I actually whimper.

"That doesn't feel very good," I tell him gently because I don't want him to _stop_, I just want him to stop hitting me so hard. It's at a weird angle and it felt painful because the position was making me pull a muscle somewhere.

He doesn't stop, he just starts slamming into me harder and I clench my jaw. "Draco," I say to get his attention as I grip the pillows so my head doesn't slam into the armrest. "It's starting to hurt."

He pushes into me so hard I whimper again and then he stops all together. He's still hard. I can feel him and he's panting as he looks down at me with narrowed eyes.

I give him a questioning look for the terrible way he's looking at me.

"Why aren't you fucking me back?" he snaps like it bothered him and I'm confused. He starts moving again, his teeth clenched as he tears into me so hard that tears almost sting my eyes.

I try to ride it out until my body gets used to it, but when he fists his hand in my hair I can't do it anymore.

"That hurts!" I yell at him and he shakes his head as he loosens his hand.

He still looks pissed off and after a few moments, he stops moving again.

"Goddamnit, Ginny," he hisses.

I open my mouth to respond, only to have him pull out of me completely. He still has an erection and I blush when I see it.

"What?" I ask as he glares down at me and I move my hand down between my legs because he was being too rough and it's actually kind of painful.

"You always move your hips. You're not doing that now. What has you so distracted? Who are you thinking about right now?" he snaps in question and I furrow my brows.

"No one... I'm not thinking of anything," I tell him, as I reach up to touch his chest.

He grabs my hand and looks into my eyes.

I know what he's doing and I block his intrusion into my mind. I actually was able to keep him out, but it just pissed him off and he started to get up.

"Babe, no," I tell him as I get up on my knees to stop him. I put my hand on his shoulder and kiss the corner of his mouth. "I wasn't thinking of anything. It was feeling good. You always feel good but that angle was hurting me," I tell him as I kiss his mouth again. "I don't know why you're so upset," I admit as I stare into his eyes. They have yet to change from their coldness. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong," he snaps.

"Why do you always do this?" I question softly. "You always get these crazy ideas in your head."

"Shut up," he hisses and I furrow my brows.

I don't know what to say to that and he stares at me for a few tense moments before he faces forward on the couch and puts his head in his hands.

I've never seen him look so... out of control and I hesitated a moment before sitting behind him and kissing his shoulder.

"What is it?" I ask softly as I trail my lips against his skin. I wrap my arms around his torso in hopes of calming him.

"Nothing," he snaps hatefully and I shake my head. He can't see it, but I do it anyways. "Don't block your mind from me," he says after a few moments of heavy silence. "It pisses me off."

I stop touching him and sit back. "Well, it pisses me off that you think you can just spy on my thoughts anytime you like."

"You shouldn't have anything to hide from me," he replies coldly.

"And you should trust me enough to know that without digging through my thoughts." He doesn't say anything for a few minutes and I sigh. "What is really troubling you?" I ask him because I know he's not mad just about this. There seems to be something boiling under the surface and I'm getting the brunt of it. "You can explain it to me, use your words like you did the last time we were in here."

"You're the only thing that's troubling me right now," he says with venom in his voice and I blink a few times. "You know the things you do fucking irritate me."

"Because I'm not _fucking_ you the way you want me to? You were being selfish and hurting me just because you couldn't preform!" I say hatefully in hopes of hurting him and when he looked at me with his gray eyes glassy and flat... I knew I had done just that and I regretted it instantly.

"Don't talk to me that way," he says in a deadly voice and I was actually a little terrified for a moment as he glared.

"Then you don't talk to me that way," I counter and he looks forward again.

He exhales slowly like he was trying to calm his temper from tearing my head off and he rubbs his forehead as I glare at him.

"I'm leaving," I tell him as I get up.

I start to get dressed again, and he doesn't say a word to me until I reach the door.

"Do you actually love me?" he asks softly and I glare at him over my shoulder with the hand on the door knob. "I mean, do you _really_ love me?"

"Yes," I tell him with out any feeling behind it because I won't let him use it against me. "And it's moments like these that make me question my sanity for even feeling that way."

He doesn't say anything for a few moments, he just looks at the wall. "I actually love you," he says with a brow raised as he stares ahead of him. "I think that might be the stupidest thing I've ever done."

Wow.

"Do you say things just to hurt me?" I ask him harshly and he finally looks at me.

"No," he says as he shakes his head and stands up. He starts walking towards me and I narrow my eyes at him. "No, I don't," he whispers and when he's close enough, he touches my cheek and puts his forehead against mine. "I'm tired," he admits after a moments silence. "I feel like I have to act all the time..." he trails off and shakes his head. "I'm overwhelmed."

I hesitate a moment before bringing my hand up and placing it over his. I try to bite my anger down because he looks so... he looks so exhausted.

"Of course you are," I tell him gently, trying to be understanding and ignoring the injustice that I feel over the things he just said to me. "I don't even know half the stuff you do, but I can't imagine being as young as you with all these big plans in the works. It has to be stressful."

He nods his head and closes his eyes.

"Do your parents..." I stop myself before continuing. "Do your parents know what you're doing?"

"Not everything," he admits. "But they know enough. They don't want to follow the Dark Lord either."

"Oh," I whisper as I look down at his shoes.

"You stress me out the most," he says as he pulls back to look at me. "I think about you all the time. I obsess over you constantly," he says with a little sneer as he pulls back and starts walking away from me. "Do you have any idea what that feels like?" he snaps at me like it was my fault. "How inconvenient it is for me to be so worried about someone else all the time?"

I try to hide my smile as he glares, but I can't help it. I actually laugh a little.

"Why are you laughing at me?" he snaps and I walk towards him.

"How inconvenient love is for you," I tell him with a little smile.

He's lost on the joke and he puts his hands on his hips. "Stop smiling. This isn't funny."

This whole conversation actually made him a bit more endearing, and I lost all anger at how ridiculous he was as I walked towards him and put my hand on his chest again. I found that even a Malfoy could be stressed and even though he handled it like a right jerk, I couldn't stay angry with him.

"I actually do love you," I tell him in confirmation as I start taking off my shirt again. I pause a moment to kiss him. "You can talk to me about things," I tell him as I start to unhook my bra. "You don't have to worry about what you say. You can trust me, Draco... I'm trying to not be so rash in my actions. I want to grow up more." I lick my lips. "I can block my mind a lot better now."

"Unfortunately for me," he says with darkened eyes as I take his hand and lead him back to the couch.

I lay back and pull him on top of me as I spread my legs. "I know your life is stressful," I tell him as I run my hand through his hair.

I always think of myself. I never think of how messed up Draco's life is. All of his plans had to have come from somewhere and it makes me think of the kind of childhood that he always hints towards. I'm sure it wasn't the loving carefree one I had and he has so much on his shoulders. He wants to kill the Dark Lord. How brave is that? It's impossibly brave to go against something you were always taught and I spread my legs a bit wider to give him room.

This is something I can give him. We all have a place like he said and I guess I could be a little bit more ...helpful to him. I bite my lip as I think about it. If this was Harry and I still loved him, I don't even think I would question it. I would just do what he asked me because I trusted him... and... right? I shake my head and bring my hand up to Draco's neck. I hate that I stress him out.

I'm a terrible girlfriend.

He does have a lot on his plate and I haven't been very understanding of that. It makes me feel guilty and I reach between our bodies so I can guide him into my body.

"You can... You can go hard like you were before if you liked it," I tell him as I angle my hips up to align with his. "I wont... I won't tell you to stop or anything," I tell him because I want to make him feel better. Small scarifies, I guess. "I'll get used to it after a while."

He stares down at me, his eyes softening. "That was mean of me," he admits. "My love making shouldn't be painful to you... unless it's the good kind of pain," he says with a smug little smile because he does know how I like it a little rough sometimes. "Or you're being punished," he says with a sinful smile as he bends down to nip at my ear lobe.

"What a lovely thought," I say and he smiles as he eases into me gently.

"Would you like to see how I punish bad witches?" he asks with humor shining in his eyes.

I smile. "I would love to," I tell him with my brows raised before thrusts into me.

"I'll have you screaming by the end of it," he says suggestively before claiming my lips.

The most annoying thing about Draco is that he usually ends up being right. This time it was to my benefit.

When I finally get back to my room, with my tattered tights in hand, Nagini is still asleep on her bed. I get dressed quickly in my pj's, watching her the whole time then I slide into my bed. When I dream, I dream about flying.

I've had this dream before and when my bird legs land me on the shaking boat, I feel something on my leg. I jump awake and throw back the covers. Nagini is on my bed, right up against my leg, staring at me.

I scream.

"Get off of my bed!" I yell as I stand up. "Go away!" I hiss and she slinks off the bed, but when she looks at me it's like she_ knows_ what I did to her and she wanted me to know that she knew.

She's just an animal. I keep telling myself that.

* * *

I used the curse three more times on her during the week. The first time I met Draco in the room of requirement for another talk and shag session, the second night I met with Daphne and we drank wine and laughed about silly things. The third night I just got out and walked about the castle, glad to be on my own...before meeting up with Draco.

I was always back when she would wake up and I was even nicer to her during the day. I became a bit braver and decided to do the curse one Wednesday morning so I could go to class with out her following me so I could actually sit with my friends... or people, for that matter. No one wanted to sit with me with Nagini close by and I wanted some companionship that wasn't shagging Draco or an animal.

I made it through half the day with out trouble and when I passed by the third floor girl's bathroom, Myrtle appeared out of thin air to follow me to my next class.

"Where's the snake?" she asked and I shrugged, not wanting anyone to know what I had done. "Where have you been, Ginny?" she asks with an exaggerated pout. "I haven't seen you in ages and ages."

"I know," I say, feeling bad about it as I pass a large group of students. They all stare at me.

First I was the weird girl with the snake, now I'm the weird girl with a ghost.

Just great.

"I'm sorry," I tell her after a few moments. "I should come and visit you more often."

"Yes," she says with a head nod. "You should. I have more questions, you know!" she yells and it echos down the hall.

I look around to see if anyone heard that and of course they did.

"Like I heard this one the other day," she says as she floats in front of me and I stop in surprise. She gets very close to me and scrunches up her nose. "What does a donkey punch mean?"

I'm saved from answering that question when I hear a few screams and I look over my shoulder to see what the commotion is.

I feel her before I see her.

I screamed out loud, that's how badly it hurt, and I immediately dropped to the ground from the crippling and intense pain on my lower leg.

I hear a hiss and when I look to my left, I see Nagini hovering by me, spitting at me in a defensive snake move. Tears spring to my eyes as I grab my leg and she coils around my body as students run away.

She obviously woke up from my curse and I damned myself for trying to be bold during the day. It's bleeding, it's bleeding a lot and with a sob I rip my tights open to see the wound. The two fang marks are surrounded by black vein looking spider webs and I try to press my hand against it to close the wound, but it just won't stop bleeding.

I can't believe that bitch bit me!

"Myrtle," I whine to get her attention because I know she has to be somewhere close by. The snake stares menacingly at me like there was intelligence behind it's yellow eyes but I try to ignore it. "Please."

"Oh my!" I hear the ghost's voice as she floats beside me, sitting cross legged to watch me, hovering two feet above the ground. "What mess have you gotten yourself into?"

"G-Get a teacher or something," I tell her as more blood _spews_ from the wound. Spews. It's actually spewing and now I'm feeling lightheaded as it pools underneath me.

"Why?" she asks curiously as she watches me try to stop the bleeding with my hands. Puddles of blood. "If you die we can hang out all the time."

I glare at her and her warped thoughts about my mortality and then I look at the snake. "You're a bad snake!" I yell at it as it stares at me. "You're a bad terrible snake!"

"Ginny!" I heard Pansy yell my name as students gather around. I didn't even notice them, really. I'm starting to feel woozy. "Are you okay?" she asks as she drops her bag and kneels beside me.

Snot was running freely down my face and I try again to press my hand against my leg. "It won't stop bleeding," I say as she takes out her wand.

"Let me see if I can close it. Move your hand," she says and I do so reluctantly.

"Your lips are white," I hear Myrtle sing by my side. "It's not a good look," she adds and I glare again as Pansy looks disgusted at the wound. "You look like a _ghost!"_

"It won't close," she says worriedly as I try to drown out Myrtle's giggles. "My spell's not working."

"Pansy," I say with a weak voice and she looks at me with her brows together. "I think I might pass out," I say honestly as I see little dots in front of my eyes. "Don't let me die. I don't want to hang out with Myrtle all day."

"I heard that!" Myrtle yells right before I close my eyes and faint.

When I dream, I dream of sex.

A strange drunk kind of sex where my eyes can only focus on one thing at a time, leaving the rest blurry and dark. A hand on my shoulder, pushing down my bra strap. A man's bare chest in front of me. My hand going through dark hair. Sweat on a man's neck that I lick off.

The noises are amplified. A gasp from my lips echos in my ears. A zipper being pulled down sounds like nails on a chalk board. A smack against flesh is like an avalanche.

Feelings are intense. A bite against my shoulder feels like a razor blade. Being thrown against a table feels like a train wreck. A kiss feels like heaven and my orgasm feels like flying.

It was dirty painful sex and I was just a sweating naked heap on a black leather couch when it was through. I can hardly focus on the body resting on top of mine, taking my breath away.

"Do you see?" I hear someone say in my fog of lust and I look to the right where there's a floating sphere.

It's small, the size of a Quaffle, and I stare at it as it spins on a axis. Suddenly I'm standing right in front of it. Staring as it turns and moves.

It looks like the world. A world I could hold in my hand.

"Do you like it?" I hear the same voice ask and I nod my head as that person comes up behind me, putting a hand on my stomach.

I reach out to touch it, and when my fingers graze it, it bursts into flames.

"Lovely isn't it?" I hear the voice say as he kisses my shoulder and when I look to see who it is, I see Tom.

When I turn back to the burning world... standing on the other side I see Draco.

"_Hold off on all future correspondence."_

I shake my head as I stare at the world. That doesn't really go with the dream.

"_If it's force he wants, then let us oblige him."_

What?

I blink a few times, officially waking from sleep and when I see the back of a black leather couch I feel my stomach drop. I try to sit up, only to fall back down with a weak thump.

"I believe Sleeping Beauty is awake. You may go now, Severus."

I hear footsteps leave and then a door closing. I try to focus more on staying awake, but when I hear the slithering of that damn snake I wish I was still asleep. I blink hard again and sit up. The couch is against a wall, an ochre colored wall, and swallow the large lump in my throat before turning my body until it's sitting properly on the couch.

It looks like an office. A very modern looking office with black shelves against the far wall full of books and papers. There are two large windows on the opposite wall, covered by a sheer white curtain that has a black design printed on it. My eyes focus on the metallic looking desk I was trying to avoid. There _he_ is, writing on a piece of parchment with a black feathered quill, looking completely at home in the modern work setting.

It surprises me, actually. I always pictured the Dark Lord in an ancient castle surrounded by velvet and stone walls.

"You lost a lot of blood. That doesn't please me," he says, never once looking up from his papers as I stare at him and his tailored black suit. "I'm sure I don't need to tell you that Nagini's venom is very toxic."

I feel like I'm in hell and I look down.

"There is a very special antidote that's needed to close up a wound from one of her bites. Of course," he says, sparing me a little glance as I find the strength to sit up. "You would know all about that. I understand that Arthur Weasley was in the hospital for months trying to find it."

"I know," I say as I tuck hair behind my ear and I look down at my leg where that damned snake bit me. It's all healed now, but I can see two raised scars where the fangs came in. "I remember," I whisper as I recall how scary and how sad it was after my father was attacked at the ministry.

Thinking of my Dad makes me sad, and thinking of him makes me think of everyone else and then I start to panic.

"I didn't do anything wrong," I say quickly, feeling the need to explain that so he doesn't kill my Mom like he said. "Your snake overslept. She had no right to bite me."

"Over slept?" he says, looking up from his papers to stare at me. "Is that the story you are going to stick to?"

I nod my head, feeling a bit nervous when his snake hisses. Tom looks down at her and then nods his head before looking back at his paper.

"Well, that is obviously a lie. So let's try again, shall we?"

I exhale slowly and look down. "She never leaves me alone."

"That's her job," he counters and I nod.

"I just... I just wanted some alone time. She didn't have to bite me!" I say seriously. "Everyone avoids me when she's around. I just... wanted to go to class without everyone staring at me," I half lie and he raises a brow.

"Your life must be so hard," he says sarcastically. "Heaven forbid a snake damper your popularity. I'm only running a country, taking over the world, changing the way of life for everyone on the planet but time stops when Ginevra Weasley feels like she's not getting enough attention from her friends."

I don't say anything.

"You had a dream about me," he says and I snap my head up. He gives me an appraising look as I blush in shame. "It was a sexual dream," he says with a smug smile. "I'm pleased that your mind thinks I can preform so well."

I blush so hot that I think I may melt, but I can't bother to respond.

"I didn't do... I didn't do anything on purpose... to be bad," I say softly. "Don't... don't hurt my mother."

"It sounds like you're telling me what to do," he says and I shake my head. "I can't have that, Miss Weasley," he says as he moves his paper to the side and picks up another.

"I-I wasn't telling you what to do," I say softly. "I'm just... I don't want to... I don't want you to do anything to my family. I wasn't doing anything terrible. I was just going to class!" I say as I ball up my fist against my thigh.

"You love them," he says and I'm not sure if it's a question or not, but I nod anyways. "I find love to be a fleeting amusement. Many people who claim to love each other will offer up that love on a platter if it suited them."

"You must not know so many good people," I mutter and he thinks on that for a moment before nodding his head.

"That may be so, but the stats are alarmingly clear. It's a foolish past time to those who take it seriously and dire for those who don't realize how foolish it is."

A silence falls between us and he goes back to scrapping his quill against the paper.

I stare at him as he writes. He still looks airbrushed, like someone not totally human but impossibly beautiful in his inhuman perfection. It's not natural. He seems old, he feels old, but he looks so young. It likes the children in those toddler beauty pageants where they paint up three year old's like prostitutes and prance them around in colorful clothes. It gives you a slightly off putting feeling but it's hard to look away... that's how I feel when I look at him.

"Haven't you ever loved anyone?" I whisper, trying to stop myself from saying it but unable to hold back.

"No," he says simply like that wasn't the saddest answer ever.

"No one? Ever?"

"I said no," he says as he turns to a fresh page.

"Not even when you were little? Like a toddler. Didn't you love your mother?"

With that he snapped me a look that made me lean back. "Do you not understand what no means?" I look down. "There is no such thing as love," he says and I shake my head in disagreement. "There's lust, there's amusement, there's attachment... even admiration at times, but the romanticized love does not exist. I have never known such a feeling then I know it must not be true."

There is no logic in that and I would have told him so if I was braver.

"You say you 'love' someone because they have something you want, something to offer you. Money, prestige, social acceptability... a good looking bed mate... whatever it may be it's more of a partnership than an emotion based feeling. Even love between a parent and a child is a fabricated tale born more from social responsibility more than actual attachment."

He has a lot to say on the matter.

"Love does not rule all like all those books and plays want you to believe. People like to say it does because it makes them sleep better at night thinking that something so attainable to even the poorest of wizards can concur all. But it can't. Ambition is the only true thing in the world. Power concurs all, Ginevra. If love is real, then it must be for idiots."

"Then I must be stupid," I whisper and he nods his head.

"Immensely."

I blush a shade darker, but refuse to raise to his bait and fight him on it.

"But I would rather you be stupid than conniving. You can never settle around a conniving witch," he says, giving me a smug little smirk that I can't stand. He puts his quill down and dusts off his shirt.

"This will be your last year at Hogwarts," he says and I furrow my brows. "I was going to let you finish out your schooling, but I've changed my mind on the matter. It seems you can't handle it and since Nagini has cramped your style so thoroughly, I suspect you won't mind either."

At the mention of her name, the snake rears it's ugly head from behind the desk.

"You'll go with Ruth Davenport over the winter holiday. Luckily for everyone it's only a couple days away so you're not ruining everyone's week. I will decide what to do with you after that. I don't know if it would be in anyone's best interest if you return to Hogwarts. I doubt it would be in mine considering what a headache you've become to everyone involved."

"Okay."

"Okay?" he says sarcastically. "Is that all you would like to say?"

"I said okay," I blink hard a few times and cross my arms.

I watch from the corner of my eyes as he stands up and walks towards me as he buttons his jacket. When he gets close enough, he kneels in front of me and grabs my arm.

"I could make this easier on you," he says as he searches for a vein on my arm. "I could play with your mind rather easily. I am very good at it," he says, giving me a smile. "Would you prefer it if our brief encounters were sweeter... or that you went away think that they were? Would you prefer I insult your intelligence that way?" he asks as he brings his hand up to brush some hair away from my face. "Like in your dream," he says in a deeper voice as his cold hand lingers on my cheek. "I could make you feel like you love me."

"No..." I say seriously, wanting to push him, but knowing better. "I would prefer not."

"Really?" he says. I try to slink away in disgust with out being overly obvious about it. "I have many talents, Ginevra. In all areas. You admired me once. I could convince you to again."

"No," I say. "No," I whisper. "No," I say over and over again because I can't seem to get anything else out. "No..." I whisper one last time when he grabs my hand and squeezes it.

"No matter," he says as he pulls back and sticks a needle in my arm.

I gasp in surprise at the minor pain and look away, trying not to melt into the couch because he touched me so intimidatingly. Where did the needle come from anyways?

"I am quite skilled at mind games."

I shake my head and look out the window.

"Perhaps you're right," he sighs as he pulls the needle out and I watch him use his magic to secure it and put it in a desk drawer. "Your mind is a mess. Memories are trying to surface that have been confounded for years. It's quite a train wreck in there."

"What do you mean?" I whisper softly and he smiles at me.

"The headaches," he says as he looks at me with crimson eyes. "The vivid dreams, the _off_ feeling. Those are all symptoms of confounded charms trying to break," he says and I give him a suspicious look. "I would like to point out again how odd it was that when you turned fourteen, you stopped seeing a doctor and suddenly you were all better. A terrible secret for your parents to hide from you, wouldn't you say?"

I shake my head because that can't be right. I remembered things from the chamber. Not everything, granted, but I doubt my parents would do that to me.

"They probably wanted you to forget how close we used to be," he says.

He runs his hand down my arm until it's resting over the bracelet Draco gave me. He furrows his brows and then he bends down and actually sniffs it.

"This has magic on it," he says as he taps it.

I don't say anything.

"This is very old," he muses as he holds my wrist up so he can get a closer look. "And very powerful. Where did you get it?"

"It's a family heirloom," I whisper, and it's true... it just wasn't _my_ family... well, in a way Draco actually was my family now. We were bonded, after all.

"From a family who doesn't trust you very much, I must say," he says as he sniffs it again. I cringe away only to have him yank me forward. "So many spells on this."

"What spells?" I question because I honestly don't know and his crimson eyes flick to mine as I think about Draco giving it to me.

As quickly as it started, he pulled his hand back and sat beside me on the couch, with his arm along the back by my shoulders.

He snapped his fingers and suddenly a house-elf was before us, holding a large stack of papers and a red feathered quill.

"I hope you didn't think I'd forget about this," he says as he waves his hand and the pages turn until they reach the last piece of paper at the end. "Sign it," he says as he hands me the red quill.

"What is-"

"Sign it," he cuts me off as he grabs my hand and pulls it towards the page. "The original copy suspiciously went missing from Mr. Rookwood's office," he says thoughtfully as my fingers shake. I know what it is now and I look at it worriedly. "Funny how things like that happen around you," he muses. "Now sign it."

"There's no ink," I point out and he squeezes my hand.

"Sign."

I don't know what else to do. Not when the Dark Lord is right there, telling me to do something with my family hanging heavily over my head.

I sign my name in stiff letters with the invisible ink.

Then I cringe in pain when a slit across my wrist appears and starts to bleed... I look at the paper as I drop the quill, there's my name in blood red ink, slowly appearing on the page as the wound heals itself.

"Good," is all he says as he flicks his hand.

The contract slams shut and the elf disappears with it.

I feel like I just signed over my whole life.

I start breathing a little bit heavier.

"It is a horrid day outside," he says and I inhale deeply, ignoring the quick change of conversation. It's raining. It's always raining. He crosses his leg at the knee and leans back against the cushions, getting comfortable. "Ginevra," he says as he taps his long fingers against my shoulder and when I look at his profile, he nods to the window. "Close the curtains."

That's a weird demand. I go to get up, but he claws his hand around my shoulder and holds me in place. "But..." I was going to explain that I need to get up to do as he wants, but he shakes his head.

"You're a witch," he says as he nods to the window again. "Use magic."

"I don't," I trail off as I try my pockets. "I don't have my wand."

"Close the curtains," he repeats flatly, like he didn't hear me.

"I don't have my wand," I repeat again, feeling my skin crawl because he's touching me and sitting so close in a way that makes it look like we're_ together._

"Use your magic," he says sternly as he squeezes my shoulder.

"I... I can't," I say seriously.

Only a very disciplined and very studied wizard or witch can do wandless magic and only then very minimal at the most.

"You lie," he says as he looks at me.

I can feel his red eyes dancing along my features and I shrink away from it.

"You didn't even try," he points out and I look down. "Try," he demands and I inhale a deep breath, just wanting to burn his hand off my shoulder.

I hear him click his tongue and then he squeezes his hand again, letting me know that he heard that.

"Now," he says sharply, leaving no room for argument.

I look at the curtains. They're just regular curtains and I stare at them for a few serious moments before sayings the spell. _"Aperio,"_ I whisper as I think of the curtains and Tom flicks my shoulder.

"Wrong spell," he snaps. "You're closing a curtain, not opening a jar. Do it again."

I lick my lips as I try to remember my studies and what spell I would actually use to close something as loose as a curtain. I lick my lips some more as I sort through my mental catalog of spells, trying to find something so mundane that I thought I would never actually use.

"You should use all magic," he says seriously, plucking the thought out of my mind. "There's so much to discover in our world. You shouldn't leave any rock unturned, even the mundane ones," he says flatly and I lick my lips again. I keep licking my lips. They burn. "You know it," he says as he spares me a little glance. "About three thoughts back."

I try to remember what it was, but I get distracted because he starts to _pet _my neck with his finger tips. It almost tickles, but this situation is too serious to giggle, so I try to suppress the shiver as it tingles my skin.

"That one," he says as he taps my neck. I backtrack, trying to find out what he was talking about. "Here," he says as he lifts his free left hand and I watch his fingers as he holds them in front of me.

"Watch," he says flatly.

"_Propinius_" he says as he flicks his fingers like he was getting rid of a fly and I look over at the curtains on the left window as they gracefully close. "See," he says with a smug smile, his lips right by my ear. "It's easy. Now, you do it."

I exhale slowly again. "_Propinius," _I whisper.

Nothing happens.

"Not trying hard enough," he says as his fingers go back to petting my neck. "Do it again."

"Propinius."

"That was worse," he says seriously as he tugs on my hair. I cringe as my head moves with the jerk, but I don't make a noise. "I didn't even feel a spark of your magic. Do it again and with feeling."

I pause a second and try to concentrate on the damn curtains so I can go back to school. "Propinius."

"Again," he snaps after nothing happens.

"Propinius," I repeat and he curls his lip back.

"Do it again."

"Stop touching me," I hiss at him in a whisper because it's hard to focus with him touching me like he is.

"Get used to it," he bites out, putting his arm back along my shoulders. He pushes my shirt to the side and starts to fiddle with my bra strap. That doesn't help! "Do it again."

I try to shake off the feeling of him _touching _me so intimately, but it doesn't help.

"Propinius."

Nothing happens.

"Again."

Nothing happens.

"Again."

Nothing happens.

"Again," he keeps saying after each failed attempt and I start to feel very frustrated.

I even hold out my hand try to recreate how my wand would move with the words but nothing happens.

"Do it again," he hisses and I lick my lips one more time.

They hurt they're so chapped and I'm sure they're bright red because they keep burning. It just adds to my annoyance.

"Propinius," I say and when nothing happens I ball up my hand and hold it firmly against my leg because I want to hit something. "I can't do it!" I yell before he can scold me and my breath is coming out in short gasps of anger.

"Maybe you need a little more motivation," he says and then he snaps his fingers, finally letting go of my bra.

The door behind us creeks open and I look over my shoulder to see why. Bellatrix Lestrange is standing in the doorway and when she sees how close we're sitting, and the intimate way he has his arm around my shoulders, she raises her brows.

"Bring me a Weasley from Azkaban," he says with a flippant hand wave. "Any one will do."

"What?" I whisper as I stare at him.

Lestrange nods her head and says something about "How great Our Lord is" before disappearing.

"Why are you doing that?" I ask softly, staring at his throat as he faces forward again.

"Motivation, Miss Weasley," he says as he stares at the window with the open curtain. "Is of insurmountable importance."

A moment later, Lestrange comes barreling back into the room, dragging a person who's hidden from view with a black bag over their head. It's a man, obviously, dressed in a dirty gray and black stripped uniform with a blue band strapped along his arm very similar to the pureblooded ones we wear at Hogwarts... only his has a large red 3 printed on it.

Lestrange throws him to his knees in front of us and binds his hands behind his back.

I know who it is.

I know right away just by the build and color of skin. "Charlie," I say as I lunge forward to touch him, but the imprisoning hand on my shoulder holds me back.

"He can't hear you," he says as I watch my brother struggle against his bonds. "He can't see you," he says as me motions to the bag over his head. "Why don't you try to close the curtain again?"

"I can't do it," I whisper with a cry in my throat as I stare at my brother who's so close to me, so close, but unable to touch.

"I thought you'd say that," he says as he stands up and he walks back to his desk. "I will need my wand for this," he says as he picks up his ebony wand he holds it in his right hand. "Packs more of a punch."

"This is stupid. It's just a curtain."

"Then you should be able to close it," he says with a brow raised. "Try again."

I shake my head because now my insides are twisting so badly I feel like I might throw up.

"If you refuse," he says as he points his wand to my brother.

"Wait!" I scream as I start to stand and I hold my hand like I would actually be able to stop his curse with it. "Wait, I'll try again."

He smiles to himself, like he was pleased by my reaction, and he crosses his arms. "Go ahead." he says and once I'm sure his wand isn't pointed at Charlie I turn back to the curtain.

I try to narrow my focus on the curtains and I hold up my hand. "Propnius," I whisper.

Nothing happens.

My brother starts screaming and I look at him as the Dark Lord uses his curse to torture him.

"Stop it!" I yell and I try run over to him, but the Dark Lord holds up his hand, forcing me to stay in place with a wall of magic in my way.

"You disappoint me," he says as he lifts the curse and my brother slumps against the ground with a thump. "Everyone always disappoints me," he adds with a sigh. He lifts his wand again. "I suggest trying again."

"I can't do it," I tell him as I hold onto the fabric of my shirt, balling it up in my sweating fists because I can't do anything else. "It's not fair!"

"Nothing is ever fair," he says as he shoots another curse at my brother who starts flopping around on the carpet like a fish out of water.

"Stop!" I yell again, tears forming in my eyes as I watch my brother get tortured. "Please stop."

"Do as I say and I might," he says and I stomp my foot and look back at the curtain.

I try again and nothing happens.

My brother keeps screaming.

I try again and I could swear that the curtain moved a bit, but they didn't close the whole way.

"How about a little more motivation," he says as he pulls the curse off. "Should I start cutting things off?" he asks as he walks towards my brother. "I know a very clean spell for removals," he says as he kneels beside him. "I've learned a lot over the years."

I try to move the curtain again, but of course it doesn't work because I can't do wandless magic.

The Dark Lord releases my brother's arm from behind his back and when I fail again, he uses his wand and cuts off Charlie's hand.

A scream gets caught in my throat and everything on my body feels completely tight, like I was being suffocated in a plastic bag. Blood starts to pool on the white carpet and I stop moving, I stop breathing, and I stop all thoughts as I stare at it.

"Try again," he says and I can't find my voice. "Try again or I'll keep going. There are a lot of things I could take off."

I'm going to have a panic attack.

"Don't you dare," he says as he stands up and walks towards me. He grabs my face and glares down at me. "Don't you dare start that now. Stop being such a coward and grow up. Reach your full potential."

"I..."

"You know I won't accept that answer," he says as he drops my face and goes back to my brother who's loosing so much blood.

Too much blood.

His hand is laying on the ground by his body and I feel the bile in my throat.

"I will kill him," he says flatly as he kneels back down. "I have no problem doing it."

I go back to the curtain and try to close it as my whole body shakes. He points his wand to my brother's neck and I scream the spell so loud that the walls actually feel like they shook.

"Keep going," he says as I try again, my face a mess of tears and snot and everything terrible.

I try again and when he starts to form the words for another terrible curse, I feel the magic explode through my fingers and the curtains slam shut, before catching on fire.

The flames eat up the fabric quickly before reaching the ceiling.

He laughs and hops over my brother's body to reach me. "Do you feel it?" he says as he takes my hand and puts it on his chest where his heart should be... if he had one. "Do you feel it?" he says urgently to my shocked face.

I do feel it.

My fingertips can feel a pulse through his chest and it sends a shock through my body.

"What is it?" I whisper because it feels like the most electrifying feeling.

"_Our_ magic," he responds.

The way he says _our_ worries me.

"Now," he says with a pleased smile as he watches the flames destroy the room. "That is a way to close a curtain. It appears you can do things, Ginevra," he says as he steps back. "Perhaps love is a greater motivator than I thought."

I bring a hand up to my mouth as the room starts to fill with smoke.

"Bravo," he says with a smile before shooting a curse down at my brother.

His head rolls away from his body and I do scream, breaking away from the curse he put on me to keep me in place and I run to Charlie. His body starts changing. It becomes smaller, and his skin darker, and when I take the black hood off his decapitated head I see someone else entirely.

"I don't understand," I whisper through tears as I stare down at the terrified face of a thin black man.

"Charms and potions wear off after death," he says dismissively as he raises his wand and puts out the fire.

"You... you..." I say as I stumble over my thoughts.

"I... I..." he mocks with a smile. After putting out the fire, he sits back at his desk like nothing happened. "Aren't you glad I didn't kill your brother?" he asks flatly as he goes back to writing on his parchment.

"Who... who is this?" I ask, getting over my shock and feeling terrible for the man that was killed for this little lesson.

"I have no idea," he says with a sigh. "It is a good thing for me to find you important," he says as he glances at me. "You do not want me to think of you as useless," he nods to the dead man in front of me. "You might just end up a stain on my carpet."

I might throw up.

"Do that somewhere else," he says as he waves his hand. He hisses something at his snake and when she comes out from her hiding spot, I scramble back until I hit the couch.

The snake coils around the dead stranger and then I watch as she unhinges her jaw and starts to... I cover my mouth and look away. I can't do this anymore. This is too much. I cradle my knees to my chest to get as small as possible and I cover my ears as I clench my eyes shut to get away from the horror in front of me.

After a while, I feel a hand on my arm, pulling me up.

I snap my eyes open and stare at Bellatrix Lestrange. "I will show you to your room."

"Room?" I say weakly, refusing to look at the snake and her overly full body. "I-I'm staying here?" I whisper in question as she starts dragging me out of the room.

"Ruth Davenport will come to receive you in two days."

"Two days?" I say with a sob in my throat because I want to get as far away as I can get from this place. "C-can't I go back to school?"

"No," The Dark Lord answers from behind us and Bellatrix forces me to face him before we leave the room. "I can hardly send you back there now. Why don't you use your time alone wisely and practice closing that curtain more like a witch and less like a pyromaniac."

I swallow hard and look at the blood stain on the floor.

"Nagini will be keeping an eye on you," he says and I think he knows how much fear I have for her right now. "She has my full authority to punish you again if you chose to curse her or do something you shouldn't. She's a smart snake, my Nagini," he says fondly as he pets her head. I look at the display of affection with disgust and he looks back at me. "And be nicer to her," he says as he picks up his black feathered quill once more. "She's starting to resent you."

Like I care.

"You should care. She's thinking about eating you," he says and I pale as I look at him. "And I would hate to clean up that mess. Do you see, Ginevra, why love is so foolish," he says as he waves to the blood stain on the floor. I don't move and he goes back to his papers. "Take her away now."

Lestrange tugs on my arm and I walk with her like a zombie as we head to our destination. The room she ushers me to looks like an old supply room with overturned chairs and empty boxes. My school trunk and book bag are sitting by an out of place twin sized bed in the corner.

"This isn't a hotel," Lestrange says as she pushes me towards the bed. "You're only here because he says so. You can not leave this room for any other reason but to use the bathroom," she says, her rotten teeth yellow and gross. "It's down the hall and the last door on the right. Do not go anywhere else. You know what will happen," she says, giving me a menacing look to intimidate me.

It works.

I nod my head and walk towards the bed. My wand is laying on the sheets and I pick it up quickly.

I don't even think about leaving, through. I just sit down on the makeshift bed and stare ahead of me. I feel sick. The sun runs across the sky and when nighttime falls Lestrange comes back to bring me food. Just some bread and water and I look at it for a few moments before putting it on the ground, refusing to eat it. She tells me that Nagini will be with me in the morning and I make a face at the thought.

I hate that fucking snake.

She leaves and I stare at the food again after my stomach growls loudly.

I end up giving in and drinking the water and then I open my trunk to make sure everything is there after lighting my wand. All of my things are accounted for and I decide to change into more comfortable clothes... just because... because I want to feel normal. I want to pretend I'm just going to bed like usual. I want to pretend that I didn't see what I saw earlier and pretend that I'm not stuck in a supply room.

I huddle under the scratchy covers and curl into a ball. I can't sleep, of course. I can't do anything but stare at the wall.

I do that for hours before I regret drinking that freaking water.

I have to go to the bathroom.

After a few minutes I _really_ have to go and I clench my teeth together.

I cross my legs and turn on my stomach, trying to clench everything just to make the pain go away. I don't want to leave this room even if it is to use the loo. I can't do it. I don't want to run into anyone I'd rather not and I don't want Nagini to bite me again.

I groan in pain as I start shaking my leg, trying to distract myself from how badly I have to pee.

This feels like torture of the worst kind and I try to think about something else, something to take my mind off the pain of holding it, but I just cant.

I have to go.

I make the decision and I stand up, clenching again and cringing as I feel around in the dark for the light. I turn it on and squint against it before cracking my door open. It's a long corridor and the bathroom is supposed to be at the end on the right, right?

I lick my lips and look around to see if anyone is up, and when I'm convinced the coast is clear, I practically run down the hall and I tentatively open the door. It is a bathroom, thank god, and I lock the door behind me before doing my business. Nothing feels quit as good as going after holding it for so long and I swear I was in there for half an hour before I was finally finished.

I washed my hands quickly and looked at myself in the mirror for a quick moment. I looked pale and terrified and I turned off the light quickly so I wouldn't have to see the reflection I barely recognized.

I go to open the door to let myself out, but when I hear footsteps, I freeze and slide the lock back through. There is no one in this building that I could possibly want to see in the halls. I hear voices as the footsteps get closer and I press my ear to the door to hear it.

"He's been looking for one like this for a while," a female voice says. I can place it, it sounds like Bellatrix Lestrange. "A one legged wizard with a black heart," she says with a laugh and the voices are so close they sound like they're right in front of the door. "The dementors hardly would give it up."

"I could make a wizard have one leg," A male voice growls and Lestrange laughs, it like a cackle.

"They have to be born that way, of course. It's hard to find a deformed wizard that can't grow it back!"

Once the voices and footsteps are far enough away, I crack the door open. They're gone and I stare down down the hall. They mentioned the dementors. The dark lord was saying something about having an understanding with the dementors and the taking of souls.

It makes me think of Neville and all the other students who haunt the halls of Hogwarts with their blank stares.

_No, Ginny. Just go to your room_, I chastise myself.

I don't need anymore trouble. I don't need anymore rash decisions. I just need to do what I'm told and go on my merry way. I stare for a few moments, before nodding my head and going back to my room.

I can't stop thinking about it.

I turn in the bed and then I start shaking my leg again as I try to think of something else. It's like having to go to the bathroom. It's too painful now after an hour of thinking and fighting with myself, I get up and dig through my trunk to get my school cloak out. My new school cloak that's black with the dark mark stitched along the heart.

_This is a bad idea_, I tell myself as I throw up the hood and toe into a pair of black slipper boots my mom gave me for Christmas last year. They don't tap or make noises as I walk and I want to be quiet.

_You're going to get caught, Ginny. You always get caught. You're not Harry. The world is not on your side._

I grab my wand and put it in the waist band of my sleep pants.

_Too much is at stake. Get back in bed! _

I pause for a second with my hand on the door knob.

There's still time to go back to bed and forget this stupid idea.

I stand there for a good while as I debate it and then I think of Neville and his dead eyes... The urge to be stupid becomes too much, so I crack the door open again and look out. No one is there, no people, no Nagini, no menacing shadows. I exhale quickly before stepping out and following with quick steps the way I had thought I heard Bellatrix and the man go.

It's a confusing building, full of stops and turns like a maze and I was mentally yelling at myself again when I get lost. Then I hear the voices again outside of one dark door and I hide behind a filing cabinet. It's Bellatrix Lestrange and the gruff man. She's laughing as they leave the room and they start talking about how cold the building is as they leave.

I look at the door after their footsteps carry them away.

This is Harry level luck.

I hesitate a second before drawing my wand and opening the door.

It's look like a library, but instead of books lining all the shelves there are small wooden boxes. I lick my lips and close the door behind me once I'm sure no alarms are going to be set off. I take a tentative step forward and let go of the breath I didn't even realize I was holding.

The first box I open has a brass plate on it.

_Wizard: Zack Campbell. _

_Age: Thirty five _

_Appearance: Caucasian. Brown Hair. Brown Eyes. _

_Defining Characteristics: Birthmark on right thigh. _

_Blood status: Half-blood. _

_Member of Order of the Phoenix. Threat level 2. Magic level 5/10._

I open up the lid and inside is a small ball the size of a snitch with Zack Campbell's name etched into the metal. In fact, it's gold like a snitch and I pick up and look down at it with a curious tilt of my brows. It looks like a container of some sort and when I start to twist it open, the brightest light starts to emit from the crack. I quickly twist is closed out of fear of what would happen.

I put the ball back and snap the lid of the box shut.

I move to the next box right beside it. _Melinda Crabbtree. Anthony Crockette..._

They're all in alphabetical order and I start speed walking down the rows until I get to F. Finnegan... Seamus Finnegan. I smile when I see his name and I pop open his box. Inside I find the metal ball and I thank god that his name was kept as I take his ball out and hold in my left hand. I stare at the empty box before lifting my wand.

I simple duplication spell.

Simple magic for a simple purpose. It will wear off after a couple weeks... but the Dark Lord was right. It's always best to know all magic no matter how mundane. I use the charm to make a perfect replica of the metal ball and I continue on, looking for people I know. I seem to know a lot of them and I pull my shirt under to serve as a carrier as I collect the souls of my classmates and replace them with fakes.

When I get to the L's I find Neville's name with a special star buy it. I ignore what that might mean as I take the ball out and place it with the others in my shirt basket.

_Remus Lupin._

I pull that one as well and add it with the others.

I feel like I'm at the supermarket. I wish I could take them all, but I can't carry that much and I feel really guilty for it, so I try to get all the names that I know and I promise myself to get the others later. When I get to the N's, I look for Theodore Nott's name, but I don't see it. I don't see it anywhere and I frown a bit as I think of what that would be.

I feel even worse now. Theo was just a teenager, just a boy, and even though he did horrible things to my friend I didn't think he deserved a life like that.

I tried to shake that terrible feeling off as I collected more names. When I got towards the end, I sent a look at the W's.

_Arthur Weasley. _

_William Weasley._

_Charles Weasley._

_Percival Weasly. _

_Fredrick Weasley. _

_George Weasley. _

_Molly Weasley. _

Everyone. Everyone but me and Ron and I start gathering them together with so much haste that I nearly drop everything I'm holding.

He did this terrible thing to my whole family. In a way, I had really lost them. What of my mother? Was she really in a flat in knockturn ally like Draco and the Dark lord had said. Did she get my letter? Could she even read it?

I hear a noise behind me and I quickly gather up all the snitches and put them in my shirt. I hold it all tightly as I scurry out of the room. I don't want to push my luck any more and I make it all the way to my room where I roll all of the balls on my little make shift bed.

I have a whole mound of them and I hide them at the bottom of my trunk. I curl under the covers and stare at the wall until morning comes.

I'm just waiting for someone to bust into my room and demand to know where I put the souls, but no one does and I get dressed slowly as I stare at the trunk. I'm glad to have them, but I actually don't know what I'll do with them now.

Nagini follows soon after and she stays with me most of the day. I get three meals of water and random meats and breads before night falls again. I was planning on going to the soul room to collect more, but Nagini stayed by the door, curled in a ball and watching me with her serpentine eyes that made me uncomfortable.

I hate her.

When morning comes again, I'm already awake and dressed, glaring at the snake as she sleeps.

Someone knocks on the door and I jump.

"Yes?"I whisper and an older man opens the door.

"Ruth Davenport is here to receive you," he says. "I'm to help you with your things," he says as he walks into the room and goes to pick up my trunk.

"No," I snap quickly and he looks at me with a tilt of his head. "I can do it," I tell him as I take out my wand. "I'm a witch," I say and he nods before stepping aside.

I magically lift my things and I give the stranger a sideways look as I follow him out of the room after double checking to make sure I have everything. Waiting in the main hallway of the big and metal building is Ruth Davenport and her son who's giving me the once over as his mother chit chats with a tall guy who's standing guard by the door. I let my trunk carefully lower to the ground when she notices me.

"Ginevra," she says with her eyes brightening like we were old friends. She walks over to me and embraces me. I feel awkward about it and I try not to show it as she kisses my cheek. She's towering over me, wearing sky high nude heels that look painful. "How good to see you," she says when she pulls back. "How are you?" she asks as she looks over my shoulders like she was waiting to see someone.

"I'm fine," I say flatly as I try to avoid Blaise and his infuriating smirk.

"I had no idea I would be picking you up here," she says loudly with another smile as she looks around. "Our Great Lord does most of his business in this office. What luck you have to see it up close," she says and I look at her. She's wearing a beige skin tight dress with a cowl neck line that scoops down so low I can see her cleavage and she has large diamonds weighing down her ears.

"I don't think he's here," I tell her flatly because I think I know why she looks so eager.

"Yes," she says, smiling at me with a fake grin. "Of course. Let's show you to our home. Blaise, be a dear and get Ginevra's things, will you."

"No," I say as he lifts his wand. "I can do it."

"I'm a gentlemen, _Ginevra,_" he says, rolling my name off his tongue in a way that makes me narrow my eyes. "And a gentlemen never lets a girl magic her own bag," he says as he lifts his wand.

I look at the trunk as it floats by me. "Of course, you're right, Blaise," Ruth says as she puts her hand on my arm. "Let's Apparate."

"Don't you dare drop that," I whisper when I pass Zabini and he gives me an amused look as we walk outside.

"I forgot how pleasant you were," he smiles at me and I sneer before watching my trunk with it's important contents float beside us.

"I'm so pleased you'll be joining us for winter break," Ruth says when we reach the App zone. "I have so many lessons planned for you. I'm sure you will enjoy them all," she says and I nod my head.

"I'm sure," I mutter as we come to a stop.

I look back at the large building we just left. It's a tall metal thing that's full of windows that shine against the sun like mirrors.

I look back to Ruth Davenport as she starts rolling up the bottom of her dress and I raise my brows sky high when her leg is exposed to the crisp air.

"What..." I trail off when I see her wand strapped to a guarder belt on her well shaped thigh and I look away quickly, back at the building where I see the guards gathered at one of the windows, watching the display. "Jesus," I whisper to myself as I look away from the gawkers.

This is so awkward.

"Ready?" she asks as she lifts her wand and puts her dress back down in it's proper place.

I can practically feel the disappointment from the men in the building.

"Blaise, bring Ginevra's trunk," she says before taking my arm.

We pop in front of a large and beautiful house and she starts down the walkway as Blaise pops behind me.

I wait to walk with him and my important trunk.

"One thing you'll learn rather quickly," Blaise says by my side as we start following his mother towards the house with my trunk close by. "My mother doesn't exist unless people are looking at her."

I frown at that and then I look back at the house where Ruth Davenport is _strutting_ towards the front door.

I can barely find myself to care as the souls hidden in my trunk weigh heavily on my mind.

Before we walk through the door, a guy walks past the right side of the yard with his shirt off, wearing a pair of board shorts. It's freezing outside and I raise my eyebrows at him as he walks into a brick building by the house. When I look to Blaise for an explanation, he smirks.

"Indoor pool," he explains.

"Who was that?" I whisper and he smiles.

"That's Chuck. My mother pays him to do things around the house." he says in a voice that tells me that Chuck doesn't really do much for that money. "She likes them young," he says with a brow raised as he opens the door for me. "Ask your boyfriend."

What did that mean? I didn't get to ask because at that moment, Ruth realized we weren't right behind her and she called to us.

Ask your boyfriend? That didn't seem suspicious at all.


	17. Chapter 17

"Do you draw?"

"Not very well."

"Do you play an instrument?"

"No."

"Do you know how to formally dance?"

"A little, I think."

"How many languages can you speak?"

"Um, one," I admit with a red face and Ruth raises her brows as she looks me over.

"Do you sew?"

"No."

"Then what do you do?" she asks and I lick my lips as I stare at the fish on the plate in front of me.

"She writes," Blaise answers for me and I snap him a look as he raises his wine glass to his lips. He smirks at me. "Quite well, actually," he says and I frown.

How would he even know?

"Well, that is something," Ruth says as she sits back in her chair to eye me. "I must say I am rather pleased that you haven't had the proper training of a lady," she adds with a grin. "I am not Narcissa Malfoy. Those staples of femininity do not apply to a woman like me and I must say I find the whole 'accomplished woman' a bore. You should know more than how to sew a cushion and say hello in five different languages to be a success into today's age."

I don't say anything.

"This will be a whole lot of fun," she says with a smile before going back to her food.

This is the first meal we've taken together. After I arrived here, I was shown to my room and I took my meal in there for the night. I didn't have to see anyone until today, when I was called down from my hiding spot to have dinner with their odd little family.

"Tomorrow morning we'll start your lessons," she says as she cuts into the fish thing on her plate. "I have an early breakfast with Monty, but we'll meet in the dining hall at nine thirty, how does that sound?" she asks and I nod.

Like I have any options.

"How is Monty?" Blaise asks, his tone of voice hinting towards the fact that he could care less.

"He is doing perfectly well," Ruth answers, never looking at her son as she takes a sip from her wine glass. From what I've gathered 'Monty' is the new husband. "If you responded to any of his owls, I'm sure you would know that."

"Hm," Blaise says as he winks at me. I quickly look away. "What's the point of trying to build a relationship with the man when we both know he won't be around long enough to care?"

There's a heavy pause in the room and then Ruth takes out her wand and clears Blaise's plate. "It looks like you're done eating, darling. Why don't you go to your room?"

"No," Blaise replies flatly and I feel really awkward so I slump down in my seat again, trying not to look at anyone.

"You look tired," she says in a sugary sweet voice. "Go to bed."

Nobody moves, nobody breathes, and I flick a quick glance to Zabini to catch his reaction. He has his jaw clenched and he's glaring at his mother with a brutal intensity.

She's glaring right back.

"Now," she says and then she blinks at him. "You need to lay down. You look _exhausted_, my love."

Blaise doesn't move for a few moments and then he scoots his chair back. It scraps against the floor loudly and I watch him with my brows raised as he throws his napkin down on the table and stomps out of the room. When he's gone, the door slams, and I look back at my plate.

Oh, man. I feel like I just watched a child get put in place.

"Lesson number one, Ginevra," she says as she snaps her fingers and the albino house elf appears. "Never let a man talk to you with disrespect. Even if you love them," she says as she orders the elf to bring us two shots of... something called a red devil. "The moment you let them see a weakness, you're done for."

"Oh," that's all I say because I'm an idiot, but I don't know how else to respond.

I've never met a woman like Ruth Davenport before I didn't know how to carry myself.

"How are you liking your room?" she asks as an elf comes back with two shot glasses on a silver tray.

The liquid inside of them is red, and they're on fire.

Literal fire.

"It's lovely," I tell her and it is. It's a large bedroom that's all white, silver, and heavenly... like a room fit for royalty.

"I trust you slept well last night?"

"I guess," I whisper.

Truth is I didn't sleep one fucking wink. I'm too stressed and I can't help but play over every traumatic thing I've witnessed this year... like if I view it enough, it will turn out to be a puzzle that all falls into place.

"It's one of the best bedrooms in the estate," she says as she sighs loudly and hands me one of the shot glasses. "Carmine's sister, Georgina, designed the room herself."

"Carmine is Blaise's father, right?" I ask as I look at the flames dancing on top of the shot.

"Yes," she says as she looks me over. "Just so you know you can go anywhere in this manor," she says as she waves her hand around in the air. "The house is open as well as the grounds. We just ask that you stay inside of the Apparation ward. The Dark Lord was very specific on his restrictions for you. Please do not make me regret being so nice to you."

I nod my head.

"I don't believe you'll find much of interest here," she says as she looks around with her lips pursed in thought. "I've wanted to quit this house for years, but Blaise refuses to move," she rolls her eyes. "Sometimes we must give whining boys what they want, don't we?" she asks and I nod my head because... I think should. "Once he graduates he can have it," she says dismissively. "I've been looking around for an update for ages."

"Oh." Again, that's all I say.

She holds up her flaming red devil shot and urges me to do the same. "To our wonderful winter break," she says as she clinks her glass against mine.

"I'm..." I trail off when she pulls the glass back. "I'm not of age," I mutter as I look at the flaming glass.

"Has that ever stopped you before?" she asks as she downs the flaming liquid in one gulp. I don't say anything. "Come on, one shot won't hurt you. I find this old place gets rather cold in the night and alcohol can warm a system up. Now, down with it," she says as she motions to the shot.

I hesitate a moment before drinking it.

I cough as it goes down and then I make a face because it tasted horrible.

"That a girl," she says with a smug smile. "Feel free to help yourself to my liqueur cabinet as well. I think the drinking age is ridiculous," she says with a laugh and I can't help but think about how much my mother would _despise_ her. "I can't rightly tell the younger people around me not to drink when I did the same thing when I was a teenager."

"Yeah..." My mother would want to kill her right about now...

"Now, tomorrow I think we'll get you a hair cut and then go shopping for a winter wardrobe," she says as I try to shake off the taste of that terrible drink she just made me consume. I resist wiping off my tongue with a napkin. "The Dark Lord has given you a rather hefty allowance and I would hate for that to go to waste."

"Yes," is all I say because I'm too afraid to say anything else.

"So what are your thoughts on him?" she asks, blinking at me as I start fiddling with the napkin on my lap. "The Dark Lord. Not many people have had the honor of having so many private meetings as you have."

"I think he's-"

I stop. I wanted to say he was scary, but I couldn't get the words to roll out.

"It's-"

I wanted to say it was intimidating, but I just couldn't bring myself to say it.

"I think-"

I wanted to say that I thought he was frightening to be around, but nothing came out. It was like I physically couldn't say anything bad. I took a quick drink of water as she eyed me with her dark brows raised. I remembered the contract I signed and what Draco had told me about it. It would literally bar me from saying bad things about the Dark Lord and our time together.

I would never be able to tell anyone about the horrible things I've seen or the scary things that happened to me.

"It's fine," I end up muttering and she nods before checking her watch.

"Well, look at the time," she says as she stands up. I go to stand as well, but she raises her hand. "Oh no, darling. You stay. Finish your food. I have a prior engagement I have to go to. You understand, don't you?"

"Yeah, sure,'" I say in confusion.

"Now, if you need anything just snap," she says as she snaps her fingers. "And Franklin will help you."

With that, the albino house elf pops back into the room, looking all sad and depressing as it bows at the waist.

"Franklin, you will obey Ginevra like she was one of us, do you understand?" she asks and the elf nods his head. "Enjoy your night, dear," she says as she starts walking out of the room. "Remember, meet me here at nine thirty tomorrow," she says before blowing me a kiss and leaving.

Uh, okay...

The house elf is still there, staring at me like it was waiting for a command and I send him a sideways look. "Um, you can go now..." I say and he bows again before popping away.

I'm left alone in the large dining hall and I start eating the fish again before putting down my fork. I'm really not that hungry and being alone made me realize how big this house was. It wasn't as large as I recall Malfoy Manor being, but it was still bigger than anything I had called home.

I take a sip from my glass again as I look around me, taking in the high ceilings and tapestries of ancient wizards hanging on the walls. This place feels... empty...Empty and cold and... uncomfortable.

Draco's Manor had felt like a proper home, at least.

A home to ridiculously rich people who had way too much money, but still a home...

This place kind of feels like a museum... or a tomb of some sort. A shell of it's former glory days and, after year I had, I don' exactly want want to be alone in a tomb.

I snap my fingers.

Franklin pops in a few seconds later and I give him a little smile.

"Hi, Franklin," I say and he blinks at me. I can tell it's an ancient creature, full of wrinkles and exhausted muscles that sag on his bones. "Would you walk me to my room? I mean, if you're not busy?"

The elf looks curious for half a moment before nodding his head. I stand up and wait for him to follow before we leave the room together. His toe nails tap against the floor as we walk and I try not to look grossed out when I notice them. They're long and thick and... green.

Yuck.

"How long have you worked for the family?" I ask to make conversation and he clears his throat before answering me.

I've never really had a conversation with a house-elf before but Harry always liked Dobby. I could give Franklin a try... gross toe nails aside.

"Since I was born," he says and his voice sounds like it was filtered through a grinder. It was rough on my ears and I crinkle my nose as I look at him.

"How old are you, if you don't mind me asking?" I inquire timidly because I don't know if it's a rude question to ask an elf.

The elf doesn't say anything for a few moments as we start walking up the stairs. "I don't remember," he says after a long time and I frown as I look away.

That sounded sad.

"You work with your family?" I ask.

He doesn't say anything.

I don't say anything.

The conversation dies until we make it to my room. When I get inside, I notice him look around the room curiously with a tilt of his wrinkly forehead. When he spots the bed side table, the table that I moved to the right side of the bed, he goes towards it instantly and starts to scoot it back to the left.

"What are you doing?" I ask as he works.

"Wrong spot," he says and I step in front of him.

"I moved it for a reason," I explain gently and he stops pushing to look up at me. "I sleep on that side," I tell him as I motion to the bed. "I like it on that side better."

It keeps me closer to my wand, honestly.

"The miss likes it on this side," he says as he starts scooting it again like my comfort didn't matter.

"I'm sure Ruth won't mind if I put it on the other side for now." I tell him gently.

He actually looks a little bit mad now and I open my mouth to tell him he can move it if he wants, but someone beats me to it.

"Frank," Blaise snaps and I look over my shoulder in surprise. He's leaning in the door way with his arms crossed. "Stop being a pest and put the damn thing back where she wanted it."

"But the miss-"

"The miss isn't fucking here," he says and the elf tenses up before scooting the night stand back to where I had it.

"I really don't mind," I say because the elf looked really pissed off. I haven't seen one show so much emotion, to be honest. Besides Kreacher and he was off his rocker.

"If you didn't mind, you wouldn't have moved it in the first place," Blaise says as he lights a cigarette with his wand and blows the smoke from the corner of his mouth. "When you're done with that, you can make me a sandwich," he says to the elf and I frown when he pops away.

"I'm pretty sure you could make your own sandwich," I tell him flatly and he laughs as he eyes me from the door way.

"I could, but I won't because I'm rich enough to afford not to."

I sneer at him as I take a seat at the vanity so I can dismiss him. "You always give me reasons not to like you."

He laughs and steps into the room. "You say that like it was an option that you would." I don't say anything to that and he smirks at me. "It's good to see you alive, Weasley. The last time Pansy saw you she was convinced you were done for. There was a whole puddle of blood around you, she said."

I remember the snake bite and recoil at the thought.

"Please leave," I tell him flatly as I look at my reflection.

"Did my mother ditch you already?" he asks as he sits down on my bed. I glare at him. "I would get used to that," he says with a sigh as he blows smoke towards the ceiling. "It's one of her greatest talents."

I roll my eyes and go back to my reflection. I took a bit of care doing my hair today because I knew I would see Ruth and she would be judging me. I shake my head at my reflection. I can be so foolish sometimes. I start taking out the clips and pins I used to keep it up and I hope Zabini will just... leave... so I don't have to talk to him anymore.

"Who was the house elf talking about?" I ask curiously as I think about it because he's making himself at home and obviously not freaking leaving. "When he said 'miss'? He wasn't talking about your mother, was he? She's officially a Mrs... right?"

"He was talking about my aunt," he says tiredly as he lays back on the bed like a lazy cat.

"Georgina?" I ask as I remember his mother saying something about her staying in this room.

He blinks at me and then smiles. "You are informed. Yes, he was talking about her. He was very attached to her, if I remember," he says as he flicks his ashes on the floor. "She drowned him in attention."

"Did she..." I trail off as I face him and look around the room. "She didn't like... die in this room or anything?"

He laughs. I don't think it's funny. "She is still very much alive," he says as he lays back. He still has his shoes on and they're getting mud on the white comforter.

I make a face at it and when he flicks his ashes on the floor again, I stand up.

"Where is she, then?" I ask with my hands on my hips and he shrugs.

He flicks more ashes on the pristine white carpet and I feel my nostrils flare in annoyance...He's making a mess of everything.

Draco would never do this.

"You are getting mud all over the cover," I tell him harshly, unable to hold back and he raises his brows.

"So?"

"So? You weren't raised in a barn," I scold. I go towards him and I throw his legs on the floor. They land with a thump of his heels. "And stop putting your ashes on the ground."

"I wasn't raised in a barn," he says as he laughs at me. "I hear you were," he counters and I blush as he smiles at me. "And, unlike you, we have house-elves."

He puts out his cigarette on the night stand and I feel like punching his perfect looking face in as the smoke dwindles in the air.

"Stop looking so sour," he says with a grin, amused by my angry expression. "If I don't make a mess, then the servants have nothing to do with themselves. I'm just helping the circle of life keep turning."

"You're disgusting," I tell him with arms crossed and he stands up, taking a step closer to me.

I would take a step back but I don't want him to think I'm weak.

"You really don't think that," he says with a smirk.

He goes to touch me, but I finally give in and back away. "Stop," I tell him and he blinks a few times before dropping his hand and stepping back.

He nods his head and I watch with my brows furrowed as he clenches his fists before relaxing. He shakes his head and then he smiles at me again, like everything was fine.

"You know, the beauty about most things in our world," he says as he looks at my wrist where the bracelet Draco had given me rests."Is that there is always a loop hole. Every magic has a counter spell... Every bonding... has an unbinding..."

"Go away," I tell him as I turn my back to dismiss him again.

I don't want to listen to him. He'll just confuse me even more than I already am.

Franklin comes back into the room carrying a ham sandwich and I glance at him as he hands it to Zabini.

"I won't be here for much longer," he says with a fake pout before taking a bite. I go back to the vanity and pick up a brush to pull through my hair so I have something to do instead of hitting him. "In a couple of days I have to leave to go on a hunting trip," he says and I glance at him.

"Are you going with Draco?" I ask, remembering the letter his father had written him and he looks at me.

"Of course," he says softly. "It's his father's retreat. We have to be men and go kill some animals before Christmas."

"That sounds charming."

"Indeed," he says with a sly smirk as he watches me brush out my hair. "It's snowing, did you know that?" he asks curiously as he looks out the window.

"Blaise," I snap as I turn in the chair to look at him. "I don't want to hurt your feelings," I tell him patiently and he laughs.

"It's sweet that you think I possess those," he jokes and I bite my lower lip as I put my hand on the back of the chair to speak earnestly to him.

"Anyways," I continue from his interruption. "Draco is really stressed out right now," I tell him honestly. "I think you know that," I tell him flatly and he sits up on his elbows to watch me more closely. "I don't think it's a very good idea for us to be talking like this," I tell him, motioning to the bed he's laying on. "You know how Draco is," I admit softly. "I don't want to worry him more than necessary."

"You say that like you think I'm trying to seduce you," he says with a sly smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes. "Why would you think such a thing about me?"

"I think you know why," I tell him seriously, thinking over the conversation I had with Draco about how Blaise was attracted to me and how I just led him on.

"How boring you've turned out to be," he says as he stands up and stretches his upper body. "We do have an extensive library on the first floor," he says with a brow raised. "You know, just in case you wanted to research any of those loop holes I told you about."

I roll my eyes as he leaves the room and once I'm sure he's gone, I close the door and go over to my trunk. I carefully open it up. I move aside some clothes and then I stare at the gathering of balls I have hidden there. I pick one up, the one that belongs to my father, and I roll it around in my hands, trying to imagine what I should do with it.

If I can see them, perhaps I can... put it back? I don't even know how that would work, perhaps I should take up that library thing.

I put it back and cover them with clothes when I hear a knock on my door. I glare for a few moments before going towards it and opening it up.

I knew right away who was going to be there and I narrowed my eyes at Zabini. "What?" I sigh loudly and he raises a brow.

"You were being so mean to me that I forgot why I came to bother you in the first place," he says and then he whistles.

I hear the jingling of a bell and I raise my brows as a small black cat trots towards us.

"This is Henry," he says as he picks up the cat and holds him against his chest. "He's my familiar."

"You have a familiar named Henry?" I say flatly and he smirks.

"He's a lot better than the creepy one you've had as of late," he says as he goes to hand the cat to me. I give him a weird look as the cat wiggles in my arms like a worm. "Stop holding him like that," he snaps at me. "Hold him normally."

"Why have I never seen this familiar?" I ask as I hold the cat against my chest, trying to support his body a bit more so Blaise will stop staring at me like I'm going to drop a baby. "You didn't bring him to school."

"I never do. Animal's just get in the way at Hogwarts."

"Why are you showing me this?" I ask as the cat's tail slaps against my arm.

"Company," he says as he itches Henry's head fondly. "My mother rarely ever keeps her appointments, especially early morning ones," he says, giving me a look. "You will be alone a lot this break, I suspect."

"Oh..." I trail off. Was this nice or is this him just trying to play with me? I give him a suspicious look as the fat cat jumps out of my arms and hops over to the center of my bed. "Thanks... I guess."

"You're welcome... I guess," he mocks me with a smirk. "That is all, you can go back to ignoring me," he says before closing my door.

I frown and then turn back to the cat.

It's licking itself and I make a face before going over to the bed and pushing it off. It lands on the floor with a thump and I give it a look as I change into my pj's. Blaise was right, it is snowing and I curl into the bed before pulling out my notebook.

I haven't written anything in ages and made up stories just seem silly now. Especially when my life is ten time more interesting than any play or book.

I wonder...

_The Dark Lord is the biggest bastard in the world. _

I smile to myself at the sentence. I might be barred from _saying_ anything about him, but it looks like I can write it and writing is definitely something I feel comfortable doing.

Yay for loopholes.

I spend the better part of the evening writing down just about everything that's gone on between me and Tom Riddle that I could remember. Every scary, insane, worrisome detail.

It actually felt good to get it out.

It was therapeutic and I suspect Dr. Carol... if she was still alive... would approve.

Dr. Carol. I forgot about what he did to her and I copy that memory down quickly before I forget.

When my eyes start feeling too heavy, I huddle under the covers and try to find peace enough to go to sleep.

I'm burning up. I throw the covers off of me and turn on my side. I'm still hot and I'm starting to sweat so I take off my sleep pants, leaving me in my knickers and a tank top. When I finally fall asleep, I feel like I'm falling and when I hit the floor I'm back in the chamber.

When I was possessed by Tom Riddle, I barely felt it. It was like I was a puppet being led on strings around the castle doing terrible things and writing messages in blood on the walls of Hogwarts. I was walking barefoot through the castle then, my feet scrapping against the stone floors as I ran my hand along the wall.

My finger tips were red, dipped in blood, and I was humming a song that I've never known before. I felt like flying, I would rather be a bird than slither on my belly all day like a snake and when I got to the tallest most tower I open the window and stand on the ledge. It's very cold and it chills my bones but I could care less.

I imagine I can fly with out the help of a broom. All I need is my magic and I can fly in the clouds, over the lake and through the forest like an eagle... or a Phoenix, where I can catch fire and be born again in the morning.

When I jump, I fall for years until I finally hit the earth... it barely hurts.

I wake at eight and take a quick shower before getting dressed, trying to shake the weird dream off. I have nightmares... I always have them so they shouldn't bother me anymore. I get myself ready and walk down the long stair case as I rub sleep from my eyes. I wish I could just sleep all day, but Ruth did say to meet her at nine thirty and I don't want to make anyone angry.

I take a seat at the dining table and snap for Franklin. He brings me a glass of juice and a witch weekly with out me even asking for it. I read it with tired eyes as I wait for Ruth and I take small sips from my glass as I try not to count the seconds... I end up waiting three hours before Ruth finally shows, wearing a crisp white pant suit with a caramel colored camisole underneath.

"Hello, dear," she sings as she enters the room.

I frown and look at the clock.

"I know I'm running a bit late, but we need to leave," she says and then she looks at my outfit. An old sweater and jeans. "You can't wear that," she says with her lip curling up.

I blush and look down at my outfit. "I thought I was just getting a hair cut..." I mumble under my breath and she clicks her tongue.

"I had to reschedule that," she says as she grabs my arm and starts dragging me out of the room. "We've been invited to brunch at Priscilla Goyle's house. This is such an important step for us," she says and I furrow my brows again as she pulls us down a different hallway. "You have to look presentable."

I don't say anything and when she pulls us into a large bedroom, I stop for a moment and look around me. It's even grander than my own, with a golden bed with swans etched into the head board. I fold my arms over my stomach as she goes to her closet and I watch her back as she starts throwing things behind her.

"Go ahead and take off those... clothes," she says like she hesitated calling what I was wearing such.

I pause a second before unbuttoning my jeans as she picks out a good outfit for me. I take off the pants and fold them against the bed before taking off the sweater, leaving me in the pink tank top I put on over my bra.

"Here," she says as she pulls out a burgundy sweater dress that has a scoop neckline. "Put this on," she says before going over to a set of drawers and pulling out a set of black tights. "Do you have any tall leather boots?"

"Well... no..." I say as I quickly put on the form fitting dress. It's a little on the tight side, but because it's sweater material, it lets me breathe. She throws the tights at me next as she goes to another door. When she opens that I see another walk in closet... full of shoes.

Jeez.

I shimmy into the tights quickly because it seems like I can't doddle and she throws a few things aside before pulling out a pair of suede tall boots with a two inch heel. "These should work," she says as she walks back towards me.

She forces me down on a chair as she starts brushing through my hair and I look at the size on the bottom of the boot.

"These are too small," I admit in a small voice. "I wear a whole size larger than this."

"Make it work, Ginny," she says as she tugs on my hair, twisting it and pulling it. "You need to make scarifies. I haven't been invited to the Goyle brunch in _years_. I won't get kicked out just because you look like a ragamuffin."

I blush again and force my foot into the too small boot.

It hurts my toes, but I don't say any thing as she twists and clips my hair up. After she's finished with my hair, she scurries to do my make up and she picks out some chunky jewelry for me to wear because she said it was very in 'vogue' right now. All the rage in Paris she had said... like I fucking cared.

I roll my eyes when her back is to me and then she sighs loudly before finally deciding I don't look like a hobo anymore.

"That will have to do," she says as she looks me over from head to toe, taking in every minuet detail. She sighs again and shakes her head. I look away, ashamed that she thinks I look so bad. "Let's go," she says as she checks her delicate golden watch. "We're going to be late."

Shocker.

I let myself get pulled away again and the albino house elf is waiting for us by the door, holding two fur lined cloaks. She hands me the black one as she puts on the purple one. I sneeze loudly before she drags me outside to get to the App zone.

"This is so exciting," she says, giving me a smile.

My nose is running and I nod my head in agreement before sniffing loudly. She gives me a disgusted look before lifting her wand and Apparating us.

We land in front of a rather large white gate and she presses a button at the center of it... which I guess works as a door bell. After a few moments out in the cold, a house elf shows up to lead us to where we need to go. We didn't enter the main house, which I thought was strange. Instead we were lead to a small building behind it that was made up of purple colored glass... kind of like a greenhouse of sorts and it was full of exotic looking plants.

Inside, it's actually pretty warm, so I take off the cloak and hand to the houseelf with a grateful smile before it pops away.

"Oh, Ginevra and Ruth have arrived," I hear a woman say.

I sneeze into my hand again and Ruth gives me another miffed look before smiling and walking towards the group of well dressed women who are all sitting around wrought iron tables full of tea and small finger sandwiches and cakes.

A large woman with dark eyes stands up to receive us. She gives Ruth a hug and then she turns to me with a smile. "Why, you must be Ginevra Weasley. We have heard so much about you," she says, her eyes growing gentler as she speaks. "I'm Priscilla," she says as she holds out her hand for me to shake. I take it and we shake for a moment before she offers me a seat.

I sit quickly, my feet sighing in relief as I do so.

"I believe you know my son, Gregory?" she says and I nod my head. I kind of knew Gregory Goyle, not well enough to talk about him, though. "Not the smartest one of the bunch, God bless him, but he is a sweet boy."

I almost snort at that. Gregory Goyle is not sweet.

"Well, let's start with introductions," she says as she waves across the table.

I knew most of the women already from the times I was at Malfoy Manor, the only new face was Camille Parkinson... Pansy's mother. She was a stick of a woman who looked far older than the others and her hands shook as she brought the tea cup up to her thin lips. It wasn't what I was expecting from a parent of Pansy, but I couldn't really judge. There was a war going on and I couldn't rightly look down upon anyone.

Narcissa Malfoy was, of course, the classiest looking woman at the table and when Ruth sat down at the empty chair by her side, she raised a delicate blond eyebrow before turning towards me.

"Ginevra, you look lovely," she says as I grab one of the sandwiches. I'm starving. I didn't eat breakfast because I thought that I would eat it with Ruth... but that didn't happen.

"Thanks," I say before biting into the food. I glance around me quickly as the women clatter and chit chat with one another.

I'm the only young person here and I swallow a large bite uncomfortably when I realize that.

"You have lost a lot of weight since the summer holiday," she says as she looks me over with a slight frown.

"How did you do it?" Goyle's mom plants herself in our conversation over her tea cup. "I've been on every diet and every weight loss potion under the sun and have yet to lose the pregnancy weight," she says as she pats her round stomach.

Pregnancy weight? Really? Goyle is seventeen years old and she is way too old to have any more children. She's just a large woman who's in denial about it.

"Stress," I mutter honestly as I nibble at the corners of the sandwich... it's not very filling... it's just a cucumber and mayonnaise thing that feels like I'm eating air.

It's not very appetizing, but I'll take what I can get.

"What do you have to be stressed about?" Ruth says as she picks up the tea cup from the saucer in front of her. I finish off the sandwich and grab another."You have been the luckiest girl in the world as of late."

"It's hard being sixteen," Mrs. Malfoy says as she folds her hand on her lap. "With so many expectations," she says and I look at her in surprise as she smiles at me. "Is it not?"

"Well, I will say that I do not envy kids these days," An older woman with gray hair purses her lips as she continues. "All those slutty clothes and parties," she shakes her head and I look back at Mrs. Malfoy. "And drugs! Oh, I hear that kids are eating drugs like candy now-a-days. Who ever heard of such a thing?"

Mrs. Malfoy's reactions are hilarious and her lip curls back for a moment before she switches the subject.

"Of course, there's a war going on as well," she says, her voice sounding pleasant and sweet as her right hand plays with her jewelry, some long silver necklace with blue stones hanging off of it. "That can change a generation of kids."

She reminds me of Draco, actually, and I want to be closer to her just for that fact.

I finish the sandwich and then I sneeze again. I need to blow my nose, actually, so I excuse myself with my napkin so I can do it out of the way. I hide among some purple flowers and start blowing my nose rather loudly as my eyes water. I kind of feel miserable right now and my throat is starting to feel itchy. I think I have a head cold.

It makes me think of the flying dream I had last night... I shake the feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach and bunch up the napkin when someone approaches.

"Are you sick?"

It's Narcissa Malfoy and I glance at her in surprise. "I think so," I tell her, my nose all stuffed up, making my voice sound nasally.

"That is one terrible thing we have in common with muggles," she says as she opens her clutch to hand me a real tissue. I take it thankfully and blow again. "There is no cure for the common cold."

"It just started," I say as I blink and blow my nose again. "I was feeling fine yesterday."

"Yes," she nods her head and then a silence falls between us as she studies my face.

"There will be a battle soon," she says quickly and I look at her with my brows raised at the blunt way she's speaking. "The Dark Lord has his strong hold over England, but he must kill Harry Potter to be successful. He was foiled by a child once and his reign could not survive it again."

"Oh," I say because... I can never think of the right thing to say.

She takes a step closer to me and then she grabs my forearm with her slim hand, looking seriously into my eyes. "I know that Draco is planning something," she says and my heart starts thumping. "He is an ambitious boy and Lucius has put ideas into his head..." she trails off, shaking her head before continuing. "I care for him too much to allow him to be so foolish," she says seriously. "He puts weight in your opinion."

"I don't know about that," I whisper and she tightens her hand around my arm.

"Tell him that he doesn't have to do anything. Tell him that war is better left to the adults and that he is far too young to go up against Lord Voldemort."

"Why can't you just tell him all of that?" I ask gently because Draco wouldn't listen to me. He has his plans and he's going to see it through... he's made that more than clear.

She gives me a sad smile. "He is headstrong and he rarely listens to me, or his father for that matter. He's good at hiding things but I know... I've known for a while that he has been unhappy with the Dark Lord. We all have," she whispers as she looks behind her. "He's not thinking straight. It is better to be on the winning end of things if you want to survive and the Dark Lord will win," she says flatly, her eyes looking deadly. "Our ties are too deep, we're too close in the circle... to be found out that our son is a traitor will ruin us."

"But what if... What if he doesn't win?" I ask as I think of Harry and how brave he is.

"I have looked at it from every angle," she assures me. "Lucius seems to think that there's a chance, but I can not throw out logic. The Dark Lord is the most powerful wizard in the world," she says flatly. "Dumbledore is dead, and the fate of the wizarding world is on the shoulders of a seventeen year old boy who doesn't have an army behind him. I will not allow my son to go down in flames like the Order."

I swallow hard and look down, trying not to give away too much.

"If you aren't pleased with Voldemort," I whisper as she looks behind her again. "Then why are you following him? I'm sure the Order would have accepted-"

"Just because we don't want to follow a madman does not mean that our principals have changed," she tells me sharply and I snap my mouth shut. "It's easier to go with the devil you know."

"If...If Voldemort wins," I whisper as I bring my hand up to my mouth so I can chew on my nails. "I will have to be with him," I admit in an embarrassed voice. "I can't... I don't want to live my life like that."

"And I am sorry for that," she says seriously as she gives me a sad look. "I truly am, and if there could be another way out for you, I swear I would condone it. I had thought that you would be good for Draco in the beginning, I didn't fully understand the Dark Lord's attachment to you. I know now that it's deeper than I imaged and the Dark Lord will not be swayed in his opinion. For whatever reason he will not let you go willingly and because of that, scarifies have to be made. I would prefer my son have a broken heart than be dead. Do you agree with that?" she asks.

I think on it as well. I don't want Draco to die. I slowly nod my head.

"I implore you, please speak to my Draco. Please tell him to cease whatever he's planning." I blink back a few tears as I think about what that would mean for me. The life I would be forced to live with the Dark Lord always near. "Don't cry," she whisper as she touches my shoulder. "Your life won't be so terrible," she says honestly. "You will not want for anything, you will always be protected, and since the Dark Lord is not like a typical man... I'm sure his needs will not be tedious on you."

I sniff loudly and bring the tissue up to my nose again.

"And perhaps Harry Potter will succeed," she whispers again, clutching my shoulder. "But it can't be my son. It can't be Draco," she says seriously. "If you were a mother, you would understand what I ask of you."

I don't say anything.

"Please say that you will talk to him," she says, clutching my shoulder. "Please say that you will do what's best and not let him offer up his life for his foolish pride."

I hesitate a second before answering. "I-I'll talk to him," I say gently and she smiles.

"Good," she says, offering me a small hug. "You are a dear girl, Ginevra."

That was the end of the conversation and when we went back to the table I found that my appetite had been killed yet again. I sat and stared at my plate for the rest of the brunch as Ruth became the lively center of attention...that was until Bellatrix Lestrange showed up.

I nearly dropped my tea cup when she was lead into the room by the frightened looking house-elf. She was wearing a complicated looking dress made of green velvet and her hair was done up in wild curls about her head.

A weird hush fell over the women in the room and I suspected that she wasn't actually invited.

"Am I late?" she called as she took off her riding cloak and dumped it on the poor elf's head. "Sorry for my tardiness, but I was detained. I have an important _job,_ you see," she says, her dark eyes growing wide with mirth as she said the word.

When I looked around the table at the obviously uncomfortable guests I realized that it was meant to be an insult. I doubt anyone else at this table had a job.

"Bella, we're so glad to see you," Mrs. Malfoy stood with a wry smile on her face. "Come and have a seat," she says, motioning to an empty seat across from me.

Bellatrix eyes it for a few moments before sending a sly smirk to the other women. "I hope I'm not intruding," she says as she walks towards the seat. Her pointed shoes tapping against the marble floor with each step. "My invitation must have gotten lost in the mail."

"Of course, you are always welcome," Mrs. Goyle smiles, her lips tight and unforgiving. "Any sister of Narcissa's is a sister of ours."

I guess I didn't really realize that Narcissa Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestrange were related, but when I looked closely at the dark haired witch as she sat across from me, I could see the resemblance, and with a worried frown I could also see a bit of Draco. That kind of disturbed me in a way and when Bellatrix's dark eyes turned to mine, I looked away quickly.

She had killed Sirius, after all, and I could never forgive someone for that.

"I had no idea Miss Weasley would be joining your little tea club, Cissa," she says as she grabs a cucumber sandwich and watches me closely. "Are we trying to get into _his_ good graces?"

I knew immediately who she was talking about and I started biting my nails again, that was, until Ruth smacked my hand and scolded me for it.

"I doubt a brunch among friends has any sway in what the Dark Lord thinks," Narcissa replies coldly as she picks up her tea cup. "Ginevra will be introduced into society next year and it's in everyone's best interest that she be made as comfortable as possible coming from her unfortunate upbringing."

My cheeks turned red at what she had said and when she glanced at me I saw that her words were not said with malice... but that didn't mean that it didn't hurt my feelings.

"Unfortunate indeed," Lestrange mused as she dipped her finger into the tea cup before her and started stirring with her fingernail. "I believe all of your attempts at sucking up are in vain, I'm afraid."

As she stirred her tea, I could see the Dark Mark just under her sleeve and it sent a chill down my spine.

I sneezed again, loudly, and everyone looked at me as I tried to wipe the snot from my nose quickly.

This was just a perfect time to have a cold.

"The Dark Lord cares nothing of society and its silly rules. All he cares about is loyalty and power with in pureblooded families," Bellatrix says as she looks me over, her eyes resting on the bracelet Draco had given me as I try to stop my nose from running. When her eyebrows raise in question after seeing it, I quickly put my hand on my lap.

"I find it very strange that you pretend to know what the Dark Lord cares about," Mrs. Malfoy countered after taking a delicate sip of her tea. "Everyone knows how dangerous that can be. Especially you."

That must have been a sore subject and I saw Bellatrix Lestrange's eyes light with fire as she glared at her sister. "Indeed very dangerous. I wonder though," she says as she looks at me again before glancing at her sister. "Why Miss Weasley is wearing the bracelet I clearly remember Lucius giving _you_ on your wedding day." she adds and everyone looks at me. I look at my lap like the coward that I am. "That is odd, don't you think? Especially considering how the Dark Lord put Draco under surveillance for being far too attached to his mission," she says, giving me a sly look.

"I find nothing strange about it," Mrs. Malfoy says flatly. "Draco was asked to look after Ginevra and that is just what he did."

"Looked after her quite well it seems," she adds, looking me over. "Why give her such a valued family heirloom? I recall your husband making quite a big deal about it when you lost it right after the marriage. Do you remember?" she asked with a serpentine smile. "How he raved at you? How he forced you to go back to the beach and find it because it had been his mother's. Do you remember how upset you were... you stayed with me and Rodoplus for three days because of his anger."

"I remember that all quite well as I'm sure you remember what spells are on it," Narcissa snaps, the tops of her cheeks dotting with pink blush in her anger. "I had ceased wearing it ages ago," she adds, sparing me a glance. "And Draco must have taken it from my vanity, but it has served his purpose. Miss Weasley could have disappeared with her older brother, following Potter in hiding, or she could have done a million other things that would have been disastrous to _his_ master plan... but because of my son and his cunning she has stayed right where the Dark Lord needed her to be. Because of my son, we know what Potter has been planning and where he's going next, and because of Draco she has seen the light and turned her loyalty to_ him."_

Bellatrix laughs, it's high pitched and hurts my ears. "_Loyalty?"_ She spits the word out. "You think the little Weasley blood traitor is_ loyal._ Fear and threats do not a loyal follower make," she adds, giving me a ghastly smile showing me her rotten teeth.

I doubt Azkaban had much of a dental plan.

"Then what does, pray I ask?" Mrs. Malfoy asks with a sharp eyebrow raised.

This is really uncomfortable and everybody else seems to be thinking the same thing because they're all averting their eyes and pretending like this fight isn't going on right in front of them.

"Belief," she answers. "Belief in _his_ power and the all knowing nature of _his_ intellect." I would have laughed if I was braver but I'm not. Instead I sneezed again. "Belief in the purity of blood and the hatred of muggles and their disgusting way of life. Belief in a greater tomorrow where witches and wizards can reclaim what is rightfully theirs by birthright." She slightly stands up and bends over the table like she was giving a speech to a thousand. "Belief that the superior races of the world should rule all others. Belief that the Dark Lord is master of all magic and should be honored as such."

Master of all magic? Are you kidding me?

"Belief in his reign and his rule and his absolute power over everyone and everything!" She slammed her fist against the table, and all the tea cups clinked with the vibration.

No one said anything after her rant and a very uncomfortable silence fell among the brunch guests as Bellatrix worked to control her breathing. It had become frenzied during her little speech and I half feared she might take out her wand and start flinging fireworks to make it more of a show.

"I have seen his power," I say to the shocked and silent room.

I figure now is a better time than any to lie about something... to get the crazy person off my back... off of Draco's.

"I may come from a family of blood traitors," I add, almost chocking on the disgusting word as it left my lips. "But it's a pure line none the less. I have seen the Dark Lord's greatness first hand and I must say that my attitude has changed to favor his... designs for the future."

Bellatrix's eyes narrowed at the lie and then she tilted her head as I glanced at her.

"Don't call me a blood traitor again," I say bravely, hoping that the memory will linger in her mind for the Dark Lord to see. "I am not a traitor to my bloodline any more than you are a traitor to yours."

Silence fell again and when I glanced at Narsicca, she was eying me closely, like she was waiting for me to slip up and make a mistake.

"Well," Ruth said after a lifetime of silence. "That was intense," she added and the other women laughed nervously. "Let's get back to this brunch, shall we?"

I spent the rest of the brunch tearing my napkin under the table, trying not to give anything away as Bellatrix's dark eyes watched my every movement.

It's very unnerving to be under the surveillance of such an evil woman, but even more unnerving was the moment that I looked up and caught her smiling at me.

It took all that I had to look at the woman who had tortured Neville's parents into insanity, who had killed Sirius Black and countless others... it took every brave bone in my body to smile back.

Then I sneezed.

* * *

The week after the Goyle brunch was full of shopping, hair cuts, pedicures, and late night dinners. I wasn't receiving much lady 'training' like I was expecting. Most of my time was spent listening to Ruth talk about herself while I was being poked and primed until I looked up to her standards... and the rest of my time was spent waiting on her.

She was constantly late, like Blaise had said, and I had plenty of time to go through the library with Henry by my side like the loyal pet he was turning out to be.

I rarely saw Blaise and he left a few days after I arrived to go hunting with Draco... And as for Draco, I haven't heard one damn thing from him either. I can't stop thinking about what Narcissa said to me. Maybe she's right. Maybe I should just take one for the team. I could save a lot of lives because it wasn't just Draco's well being that was on the line. It was Blaise, and Pansy, and Daphne and countless others who had been helping him through the year.

It gave me a headache just thinking about it.

I run my hand over the silk ruffled shirt I'm currently wearing, wondering what would happen if I spilled my drink on it. The shopping was getting a little out of hand, actually. We went out just about every day and Ruth always told me that I needed to take advantage of the sizable bank account the Dark Lord allowed me while I had the chance because I never knew when that privilege would go away.

I hardly cared about the clothes. In fact, most of them were a little on the revealing side with low necklines and slimmer cuts. I was uncomfortable in most of the things I was forced to wear but I didn't have much of a choice. Not when she would look at me like I was little more than a stain on the wall if I was wearing anything less than par.

The third day, Ruth came into my room in the middle of the night, half way drunk and laughing as she opened my trunk and started to go through my clothes. I was in the final, bad, stages of my cold and I stayed in bed for most of the day.

"These are all tragic," she said as I ran over to her to stop her.

I didn't care much for my own clothes besides the basic attachment one would feel to their things, but I had those souls hidden towards the bottom and her finding them was the last thing that I needed.

"We shall give them away," she sang as she threw sweaters and homemade dresses over her shoulder.

I scrambled to gather them up and my body ached from my sickness.

There were a few things I refused to part with.

Everything my mother ever made me... .every Christmas sweater, every terrible hat, every summer dress... I held onto those for dear life and Ruth rolled her eyes before saying that I could keep them as long as I didn't wear them in public.

I nodded in agreement and watched as she called for a house-elf to bag up the rest of the wardrobe. "You won't be needing any of these things," she had said, waving her hand to the servant as it rummaged through my trunk.

I was a nervous wreck, red faced with fever as the creature dumped out all of my clothes to sort through. Thankfully... by some miracle... the souls were saved and I snapped the lid shut and sat on top of it as she continued on her rampage with the chest of drawers I was using for my under things.

She threw away all of my underwear. Every cotton knicker and every loyal bra was just thrown in a bin like they didn't matter.

"How do you ever expect to feel like a lady in any of those things?" she had said in distaste as she picked up a pair of white cotton knickers that I had... embarrassingly, for a while... but they worked and they didn't have holes in them! "We'll buy new ones tomorrow," she added flippantly before throwing it into the bin with the others.

I was kind of sad to see them go. Some of those were my comfort knickers and my once a month because they cover everything panties... But she assured me that I would buy more than I could ever need.

And we did.

We bought chests full of boy shorts, hipsters, thongs, bikinis, high cut, low cut... full coverage... every different cut of panties under the sun in every color and pattern imaginable. In silk, lace, and cotton. Then hours were spent on bras. Push up, strapless, colorful, skin colored... all of them sexy and all of them new. She made me buy new sleep wear as well because she detested the sleep pants and ratty old t-shirts I seemed to favor.

"You must go to bed looking good," she said as she threw piles of silk nighties at me. "Silk is good against your skin. You should always sleep in it," she told me after throwing a peach colored robe on top.

It was exhausting being with her all the time. She ran at high speeds and rarely stopped for a break.

"Ginerva?" I blink out of the memories and I pet Henry's head as he sleeps on my lap. I've been spending my time in their small library, trying to find anything and everything about souls detached from the body.

I wasn't having much luck.

"Yes?" I say as I look at Ruth standing in the doorway.

"Come. I want to show you something."

"Are we going shopping again?" I ask as I stand up, letting Henry jump to the ground.

Ruth shakes her head and I pick up the cat to take with me as we walk towards the basement. "Where are we going?" I ask timidly as we start heading down the cement stairs.

It smells like the chamber, all damp and musty.

"I'm going to give you some very vital information," she says as I hold Henry a little closer to my heart. "This is very important. Every woman needs to have this collection. You should never rely on anyone else for your happiness," she says as she looks at me

I don't know what she's talking about.

The basement is just a large open room with a low ceilings and yellow hanging lights. At the end of the room is a black cabinet built into the wall and in front of that is a large cauldron with a stirring spoon resting inside of it.

A witches lair if there ever was one.

"Potions are my specialty," she says as she takes a key from her pocket and she opens the cabinet with a twist of the lock. "I've mastered a few of them over the years."

Inside are rows and rows of small purple bottles that have yellow labels on the front of them. I furrow my brows worriedly as she takes out a small velvet bag from one of the shelves.

"What's that for?" I ask as she taps her long fingers along the bottles, making them click.

"I'm giving you a starter kit," she says with a grin as she picks one of them up. "This, is birth control," she says as she puts it in the bag.

I open my mouth to tell her I'm already covered with that, but I stop myself. I shouldn't rely on Draco for my reproductive needs. Henry jumps out of my arms and I watch as he runs up the stairs again, back to safety. _Traitor,_ I think bitterly before turning back to Ruth.

"This one," she says as she picks up another. "Will make your boyfriend... or husband... sick," she says and I make a face that she laughs at. "They can be persistent. If you're not in the mood just slip this into their drink. Trust me, once you're married you will be grateful for it."

"Thanks?"

"And this, is for the opposite. It will stir a man's libido. Men will do ridiculous things if they want to have sex with you."

Inappropriate.

"This is a love potion," she says as she puts it in the bag. "Use that sparingly. It wears off after a while and it makes the drinker... very violent if the dosage is wrong. Get what you want and then leave. They'll never know what hit them," she says.

Right.

"This is to get rid of pregnancy," she says, showing me the label so I'll remember. "You should never have a child you don't want. It's a chain that will bind you forever," she says softly before putting it into the bag.

Nice.

"This one is the most important," she says as she hands it to me.

"What is it?" I ask because I don't recognize the name on the front.

"It's poison," she says. "A slow killer. Put this in their drink for two weeks and they'll be dead as a door nail. The beauty of it is that it weakens their magic," she says as I turn it over to read the ingredients. "So they can't fight back even if they wanted to."

The words were familiar to me... this was the potion I had seen written down in Draco's notebook.

This was the potion that killed Rookwood.

"Mrs!" an elf popped into the room and I jumped, nearly dropping the potion in my surprise as the small creature bowed at the waist. "Master Blaise is back from his hunting trip!" it says.

"Good, go and tell him we'll be there to greet him momentarily."

She looks back to me and takes my hand.

"The world is big scary place for a girl," she says gently, being sweeter to now than she has ever been. "Your fate is very stressful, so keep this near," she says, pushing the bag into my hands. "Use it."

"Thanks..." I trail off, not sure what I'm thankful for.

When we leave the basement we find Blaise in the front hallway, shaking off his cloak from the snow that lingered there while Henry weaves himself around his legs. "How was it?" Ruth asks with a hand on her hip as I finger the velvet bag.

Blaise shrugs. "As good as it ever is," he says.

Ruth goes up to her son and I watch as she takes his shoulders and kisses his cheek. "Happy Birthday, baby," she says with a smile and I raise my eyebrows. "You've been getting a lot of owls," she adds. "I left all the letters and parcels in your room if you want to go through them."

"Thanks," he says flatly and then he looks at me.

"Happy birthday," I say automatically and he snorts a little before heading towards the stairs and jogging up with his hands in his pockets.

"He can get so morose," Ruth says as she shakes her head. "Anyways," she says as she snaps for a house elf. "I think we'll start your dancing lessons tomorrow. We've been invited to the Malfoy Christmas party so you must learn to dance," she says as she commands the elf to bring her cloak. "Keep Blaise company. He always acts like such a girl when he comes back from that hunting trip," she says as she rolls her eyes.

With that she was gone and I hesitated a moment before going up to my room. Henry was on my bed and I smiled at him before going over my trunk and hiding the velvet bag inside.

It was an odd gift to be given.

I picked up Henry after the bag was hidden and walked towards Blaise's room. If anyone could be sympathetic about being ditched on your birthday-it was me, but when I went to knock on his door, I heard a female voice.

It was Pansy.

"Nothing much has changed," I heard her sigh and I put the cat down so I could press my ear to the door. "My mother is back from rehab," she adds and I think of her thin mother who looked worse for the wear at the the brunch. "But I caught her putting vodka in her juice this morning so I doubt it helped anything."

"Well," Blaise says as I press my ear a little closer to the door. "You can't win them all," he says and I imagine he's smirking.

"How is living with Ginny Weasley?" she asks and my ears turn red at the mention of my name.

"I hardly know," he says and there's shuffling inside of the room. What are they doing? "I've been gone."

"Yes," she says. "You're not... you're not trying anything with her, are you?" she asks and my cheeks heat. "I've seen the way you look at her sometimes," she adds. What way does he look at me? "You know Draco will murder you."

"I am well aware of that," he snaps. "I don't need you meddling into my personal affairs."

"He loves her, Blaise. You know he does no matter what he says and he will literally kill you if you turn her against him. He's getting pretty scary about it, actually."

He snorts and I figure he's smirking. "I was just with Malfoy for a week. You don't think I haven't heard an earful from him? If you find that you can't stop talking about it, then leave."

She doesn't say anything for a while and then I hear... noises that I can readily identify as sex noises.

Ugh.

I shake my head in disgust before going back to my room. That's what I get for trying to be nice to him. I look outside. There's a thin lair of snow on the ground and I put on my snow boots and thick sweater so I can take a walk to clear my head. I pull out my notebook and a pencil before I grab a red knit hat that my mother had made me. I pull it over my head before jogging down stairs to get my cloak.

Once outside in the cold, I pull the hat down a little further to ward off the chill. The hat has ear flaps and toggles... so I know it's ridiculous but I like wearing it. It makes me feel like I'm back home... it makes me feel like things could be normal again if I pray hard enough.

The snow crunches under my feet and I walk towards the building that houses their indoor pool for the winter. There's a small archway by it that's home to a swing that I suspect must be a good spot to look out over the grounds in the summer judging by its randomness in the courtyard. I brush off the snow from the bench and take a seat. I look out over the horizon as I sway the swing forward and I give the sky a thoughtful look before opening my notebook.

I've been writing almost non stop since I got here. I decided to keep track of what's happened to me this year, starting from my meeting with Draco at Folk hills at the beginning of our courtship. I'm hoping it will help me make sense of it all and maybe help out when I have to retell this story to my family or my friends after this whole thing's is over... I hope if turns out that way... I hope I still have family and friends after this to tell my story to.

I doubt half of them would believe it, to be honest.

I pick up the pencil and start writing as the cold air bites at my cheeks.

Time passes and my fingers become numb so I pack up and head inside again, tucking my notebook under my arm as I seek warmth from the house. When I go back to my room, I notice Blaise's door is open so I bite my lower lip and turn my steps towards his doorway.

"Hey," I say as I peak my head in his room. Pansy isn't here anymore and I sigh in relief because I didn't want to walk into anything like... that.

"Hey," he counters with a brow raised. He's laying on his bed, reading a magazine and I blush when I see that he has his shirt off.

"Happy birthday," I tell him softly and he sits up, putting the magazine on his nightstand.

There are a stack of gifts and unopened letters on his writing desk and I send them a look before going back to him.

"Yes, it is a rather boring affair isn't it?" he says as he looks around his room with a sigh. "I just don't have it in me to start a party right now." I don't say anything as I linger in the doorway. "Did my mother come back?" he asks and I shake my head, feeling bad for him. "Figures," he mutters to himself.

"How was the hunting trip?" I ask because I don't want to ask about Pansy. That would be like admitting I was spying on him. "Your mother said you get sad after you come home from it."

Well, I think she actually said that he acts like a girl, but I didn't want to tell him that.

"It's a father-son hunting trip," he says with a brow raised. "And I'm pretty sure it's her fault I'm the only one with out a father there." That was kind of depressing, and I don't say anything as I look down at my feet. "I didn't speak to Malfoy that much," he says and my eyes snap to his. "I know that was your next question. That's the only reason you seek out my company."

"That's not true," I half lied as I stepped into his bedroom with Henry hot on my heels. "I didn't know today was your birthday," I tell him gently.

"It hardly matters," he says flatly as he goes to his desk and he picks up the long sleeved thermal he has resting there.

He puts it on as I play with the toggles on my hat I have yet to take off. All that I can think about is how horrid my birthday this past summer was because my whole family was so worried about Ron and his friends that they left me alone the whole day... I had to seek comfort in Malfoy who made it one of the best birthdays I had ever had.

There was no earth shattering news that would keep Ruth from Blaise today.. she just wanted to leave...

I wouldn't want Ruth to be my mother.

"I have a gift for you," I tell him as I take off the hat. He looks at me surprise as he sits at the foot of his bed. "I know it's silly and last minute," I tell him as I walk towards him. I hand him my hat. "But my mother made it for me," I explain to him as he looks at it with his brows up in surprise. "It's one of the only things I own that means something to me."

"You didn't have to give me anything," he says as he plays with one of the toggles. "You were just wearing it a second ago. I can spot an 'oh shit' present when I see one," he says as he goes to hand it back to me. "You don't owe me a present, Weasley. Today is just another day and I won't take the weird looking homemade hat just because you feel bad for me."

"Think of it as a thank you," I tell him as I push it back to him. "For letting me hang out with Henry," I say as I look at the cat, curled up on the rug. "You were right. I spend more time with him than your mother... and it's not weird looking," I defend with a pout. "I think it looks kind of cool."

"Cool?" Blaise counters as he holds it up. "Now, I know that's a lie."

"Okay, so I don't... but it still has meaning... and I want you to have it even if you don't wear it."

He smiles a little and puts the hat beside him on the bed. "Thank you," he says as he looks into my eyes. "You are far too sweet to be mixed up in all of this," he says softly and I furrow my brows. "But no matter," he says as he stands up and walks back to his desk. "Would you like to play chess?" he asks as he takes out a kit from his drawer. "I find myself rather bored."

"Um, yeah okay."

I wait for him to set up the board by his fireplace and when he's finished, he pats the chair across from his. I walk over and take a seat, waiting for him to make the first move.

"I need a drink," he mumbles before snapping his fingers.

He makes a house-elf bring us alcohol first, of course, and when I give him a bemused look he tells me that it's his birthday so being drunk is in the cards.

I cautiously take the glass of wine from the shaking house-elf and thank him before turning back to the board.

"All the stuff you force the house-elves to do, you could easily do on your own," I scold him and he smirks.

"But I don't have to. That's the beauty of it."

I roll my eyes and take a sip from my wine as the fire burns behind us. I enjoy chess to a moderate degree and, as we started playing, I was glad for the break from the loneliness I always felt and the vapid disregard of Ruth. We rarely talked into the hour and I stared at his face as he studied the board for each future move.

"Are you sad that your Mother didn't stay here?" I ask gently and he glances at me. "Since it's your birthday?"

He shrugs. "I hardly care," he admits. "It's not like I take pleasure in her company anyways." I frown at him and when he looks at me again, he laughs. "Stop looking at me like I'm a wounded puppy, Ginny," he says. "I'm the most handsome wizard in all of England and I have money. I do not need that _look_ from you."

"Are you doing anything tonight?" I ask as he takes one of my pawns.

"I'm doing it right now," he says, giving me a sly smile that I frown at.

"I doubt that," I click my tongue at him. "I find it hard to believe a guy like you would spend your birthday playing chess with me."

"Too true," he nods his head and drinks his glass. "You are boring."

Jerk.

I lick my lips and move my knight. Then I glance at him again. I wanted to avoid bringing up Draco because I knew that was all that I talked about with him... but I really couldn't help it. My thoughts were too deep.

"When you said..." I lick my lips as he moves a piece on the chess board. "When you said that thing about your Mom liking men young," I say and he looks at me. "What did you mean?"

"I meant she likes to fuck younger guys," he said bluntly and my face blushed at the admission.

"No, I meant... when you said... ask your boyfriend. Why did you say that?"

He doesn't say anything. He doesn't answer even though I know he clearly heard me and I put my wine glass down.

"Would you still follow Draco if you weren't bonded to him?" I ask as he looks over the chessboard with his fingers on his lips.

"I'm not bonded to Draco," he says as he orders his next move.

The admission surprises me and I furrow my brows. "But you said..."

"I said _you_ weren't the only one bonded to him," he cuts me off. "I never said I was."

"But... Why do you do as he says then?" I ask seriously and he finally looks at me .

"Maybe I believe in the cause," he says with a rueful grin and I frown. Then he sighs. "Draco is a powerful wizard who will be very influential one day," he admits. "I would like to be a part of that. Even though he's as mean as hell, he does have his strong points."

"But the Dark Lord..."

"The Dark Lord lost my vote when he made it known that all witches and wizards with disabilities would be sent to internment camps and eventually exterminated," he says as I think of Neville's parents and his worry about them.

I thought that was very good of him, but I couldn't understand why he would care.

"Why does that specific thing bother you so much?" I ask quietly.

"My Aunt is in a camp right now," he says as he moves another piece on the board. "Georgina. You're staying in her room right now."

"Oh..."

"She was tortured under Voldemort's regime during the first war. She was a blood traitor," he says, glancing me. "Like you."

"Don't call me that," I whisper and he smirks.

"Anyways, she wasn't made totally bonkers, but the prolonged torture did leave a lasting mark on her mind. She was like a child after that," he says as he frowns. "She was a friend to me when I was small," he admits.

"I'm sorry," I tell him honestly. "I didn't know."

"It doesn't matter," he says. After a long pause he starts again. "My mother wants me to be your lover," he says flatly and I look at him in surprise.

"What?" I ask softly and he runs his fingers across his lips.

"She thinks it could be a great asset to our family if we were intimate," he says with a little smirk. "She obviously doesn't know how much you hate me..."

"I don't hate you," I tell him flatly. "I just find you annoying."

"Charming," he says with a hand on his heart. "If I can't manage to seduce you, she wants me to use other magical means of persuasion," he says with a his brows raised. "I don't think she realizes that it would burn the shit out of you."

"Oh..." I don't say anything to that. I just send a worried frown down to the chess board.

"You sleep walk," he says another random line and when I look to him... he seems rather serious.

"What?"

"You walk... in your sleep," he explains like I was an idiot. "You did it every night before I left for the hunting trip."

"I did?" I whisper.

He nods his head, the curls falling in his eyes. "You sing sometimes... and sometimes you hiss."

"Like a snake?"

"Like a snake," he confirms. "Ginny," he says, looking at me. He didn't say my name jokingly this time... it was much more serious. "I believe things are going to get far worse for you before they ever get better."

"What does that mean?" I ask, forgetting about the chest game as I lean forward.

"That means a great deal of things," he says as he moves his knight by my king.

"Can you explain that?" I ask with a worried frown and he sighs loudly.

"No," he says flatly.

I look down at the board again because I know it's my turn.

"Check mate," he says flatly after I realize what he's done.

"You cheated," I whisper as I look over the game, trying to see where the mix up was.

"Prove it," he counters and I inhale a short and angry breath before standing up.

I will not let him provoke me and try to muddle my mind with riddles. I scowl at him before I go back to my own room and I could swear I heard him laughing as I left.

* * *

I've been avoiding Zabini for the past few days and I make sure to lock my door each night. Daphne said he lies... so was he lying about my sleep walking? What was I even doing walking around when I was always right in my bed in the morning?

I hardly know.

Ruth gave me dance lessons earlier today which consisted mostly of her snapping her fingers for the elves to bring her more wine and me uncomfortably dancing with a house-elf who was made to walk on magic stilts to reach my height. I didn't learn a damn thing and it was uncomfortable for everyone involved.

I didn't understand why I had to learn this way and she answered me with a harsh voice. Blaise, she said, refused to help in my lessons because he was a selfish brat who cared only of himself.

I had the impression that Ruth Davenport didn't think too highly of her only son and it made me question the honesty of him saying she wanted us to be lovers... because, honestly, it seemed like she could hardly stand him and she didn't sugar coat that when I was around.

In any case, I was glad it was the elf and not Blaise I was dancing with. I don't think I could have handled his sly smirk and catty remarks.

It was a long and exhausting lesson and I went to bed right after supper.

In my room, I fell asleep quickly and woke a few hours later to use the loo. I get up and stretch my arms above my head before grabbing that silk robe Ruth made me buy. I hated it, but I hated the little slip I was wearing more and I refused to go in the hallways so unclothed. Unfortunately for me, the bathroom is right across from Blaise's room and I give his door an annoyed look when I see he still had his light on.

Jerkface.

After using the loo, I wash my hands and dry them on a towel before leaving with quiet steps so I don't let him know I'm awake. I would hate for him to come out and bother me when I would love nothing more than to go back to sleep.

"I've seen it." I stop in my tracks when I hear that voice coming from Zabini's room.

It's Draco.

I bite my lip before creeping over to his door to listen.. "It's what I suspected."

"Does she know?" I hear Blaise ask and I frown as I push my ear to the door and hold my breath.

"I can only get to the memory when she's asleep," Draco answers flatly. "She doesn't even see it herself it's so hidden."

They're silent for a moment and I almost knock to make my presence known, but something stops me. Something inside of me knows I should just listen for information. Neither of them would tell me anything outright, anyways, I justify to myself.

"I'm sure I can find a separation charm or something," I hear Draco say softly, his voice sounding rough and stressed. "There's a counter to everything," he adds. "I just need to focus more."

"What if you can't?" Blaise asks. "Would that end better justify the means?" he questions in his smooth voice and I frown again. "You've had this in the works for a long time. You knew this was a possibility-"

"I don't need you to tell me that," Draco snapped and I could tell that he was glaring. Just the tone of voice gave that away.

Henry meowed behind me, making me jump and I was afraid I would be found out so I tip toed back to my room. I waited for two hours, and I was almost asleep again when my door opened swiftly. It scared me and I jumped up to face the intruder, half awake and hazy in my memory.

"Geez," I put my hand on my heart when Draco turns on the lights. It hurts and I squint against it as my eyes adjust."You scared me. I thought you might be Blaise," I say softly so he doesn't catch onto my spying.

It backfires. He stops and raises an eyebrow with his hand on the door knob.

"Does he come into your room often in the middle of the night?" he asks sharply and I roll my eyes.

"Of course not," I tell him seriously. "How did you get in?" I ask as he heels out of his shoes.

"It's not like I'm blocked from the wards here, Ginny," he says tiredly like I was stupid for even asking.

"Oh," I say as I slump down.

He shuts and locks the door behind him as I rub sleep from my eyes.

He approaches me and when he's close enough he puts his hand on my face. I look up at him curiously as his fingers trace my jaw. "I'm not very nice to you, am I?" he says softly.

I shrug a shoulder and get up on my knees to kiss him.

"It wouldn't hurt you to be a little nicer," I mutter against his lips as I pull him to me with my arms around his neck.

I would dearly love to ask him about what I overheard, but I know I shouldn't... and I know he would just talk me around it.

"I think I would die of shock," I tell him, trying to joke but he doesn't smile. "Are you okay?" I ask gently as I run my hand down his back.

"You smell nice," he says instead of answering my question and he puts my hair over my shoulder so he can kiss my neck. I turn my head to the side to give him better access.

"Thanks?" I whisper with a smile. "Don't I always smell nice?"

"Yes," he says as he pushes me back so I'm laying on the bed.

"Draco, shouldn't we talk?" I say as he starts to crawl on top of me. I haven't seen him all break. I feel like I have a lot to tell him.

"Why? What's there to talk about?"

"I haven't seen you for a while," I sigh. "You know...I feel like..."

I was going to scold him for not talking to me... an owl would have sufficed, but he cut me off.

"I don't want to talk about it," he snaps hatefully.

"But... your plan..."

"Don't press me into talking about something I don't want to talk about."

"Okay," I say with a frown. "I'm sorry."

He stands over me and rubs his forehead. "I'm sorry," he says flatly as he looks at me. "I'm so mean to you," he says as he walks way from me and he runs his hand over his face. "I have a headache."

"What's going on?" I ask softly as I stand up to approach him.

"I don't want to talk," he snaps as he turns to face me.

He grabs my face and crushes his lips down on mine. I'm stunned for a moment by the forcefulness of it but eventually I get into his rhythm. I'm not actually in the mood to have sex, but I want to comfort him and, if this is what he wants, I don't think I have the heart to deny him. He starts to untie my new silk robe and when he sees the slip I have on underneath, he stops the kiss and looks down with his brows raised.

"What in the hell are you wearing?" he asks sharply and I start to close the robe self-consciously.

"Ruth donated most of my other clothes after she made me go shopping," I admit with a blush, thinking he doesn't like it. "She said the silk was good for my skin... or something like that."

"You had better not be wearing this to breakfast in the mornings," he says with narrowed eyes. He pushes the robe down my shoulders and he starts sucking on my skin, where neck meets shoulder.

"Does it look that bad?" I whisper, unsure of myself in it in the new outfit.

"It looks see through," he snaps as he puts his hand around my waist and letting it trail down until he reaches my... yeah... He pushes me against him a bit more and I put my hand on his arms for balance.

Now I feel bad about myself and I make a face as he starts placing kisses on any exposed part of my body.

"What else did she buy you?" he asks before he sucks on my neck so hard that I know he's going to leave a mark. It makes me cringe in pain, actually, and I grit my teeth as he runs his thumb over my lips. I feel like he's consuming me right now and I can barely breathe.

"She didn't _buy_ me anything," I tell him. I hiss when he sucks a bit harder and dig my nails into his arm. "The Dark Lord did," I say flatly. "That hurts," I whisper.

He stops his assault on my neck and he pulls back to look down at me. "The Dark Lord bought you this?" he asks and I nod. "Really?" he says with a sharp brow raised in question and I nod my head.

"Yes," I answer honestly.

"So, the Dark Lord wanted to buy you clothes and this is what you chose?" he snaps as he motions to the night slip.

"I...I didn't pick it out," I tell him as I push back so I can get away from his firm embrace. "I had no say in half the stuff I picked out. Stop making me feel bad about it," I tell him as I step back and put my hand along my stomach. "I can't control anything in my life."

He stares at me for a few moments before rubbing his forehead and trying to pull me close again.

"I'm not in my right mind," he says as he runs his hand up my side. "You look very sexy in this," he says as he looks down at the slip that makes me feel terrible. "I like it. I like it too much and it drives me mad to think someone else will see you in it," he explains, trying to use his words again. "I am not a very understanding boyfriend," he admits and I would snort if I was feeling better about it.

"Is that your apology?" I ask.

"Yes, I suppose it is."

"I guess I've become accustomed to not expect mushy declarations from you," I tell him with a half hearted smile.

"I can't be that way for you," he tells me honestly and I nod because I know... I've always known. "I'm sorry," he adds like he really was.

Somehow he always manages to say the right thing to me and I take his hand, intertwining our fingers before walking him towards the bed.

When I lay back on the mattress, he takes my leg and places it on his lap. I watch with brows furrowed as he runs his fingers up my foot until they reach the two raised scars where Nagini marked me.

"You were alone with him again?" he says as he runs his fingers over the healed wound.

I nod my head.

Then I remembered the contract I signed under all of the horribleness that happened to me... I look at Draco.

I try to open my mouth to tell him about it... but nothing comes out so I reach for my notebook and sort through the pages until I find the passage that I want. He watches me, his fingers trailing the two fresh scars on my leg as I try to find the words I had written.

When I get to it, I hand it to him and he raises his eyebrows before taking the book.

"_It was awful_," he reads out loud. I draw my knees up to my chest and hug them like a child. "_He made me believe he was torturing my brother... he made me believe he was killing him just so I would close a damn curtain." _

"A curtain?" he asks with a brow raised and I nod my head.

"Keep reading."

"Why can't you just tell me?" he snapped and I tapped the page again.

"Please, just keep reading."

"_He wanted me to do wandless magic... he made me..._" He trails off because my words had trailed off on the page. I shudder as I think of it. "_He forced me to do it by doing terrible things to a person I thought was Charlie. When he killed him I thought..."_ I blink hard. _"I thought my heart had dropped in my stomach." _Draco's voice is so deep and smooth- it calms me even with the horrid words he's reading. _"But it wasn't him, it was another man that he made look like Charlie. Why would he do that?"_ My words ask the question from Draco's lips and I reach forward to touch him.

"Why would he do that to me?" I question now that he understands and he rubs his forehead.

"He does that so if it happens again... you will allow yourself to have a sliver of hope that the person he's torturing is not your loved one at all. That way the blow is much greater when it turns out that it actually is."

The explanation makes me shiver and I blink hard a few times.

"Why are you making me fucking read this, Gin?" he asks and I bite my lip before taking the notebook and turning it back a few pages.

I hand it to him again.

_I signed a contract._ I had written those words and I watched as he read them, not bothering to say it out loud this time._ It was exactly like the one I took from Rookwood. It took my blood as ink._

"That's why you can't talk about it," he says flatly after looking up and I nod my head. Then his face becomes a mask of fury as he snaps the book closed to glare at me. "Why did you sign it?" he hisses at me and I let my mouth hang open in surprise before blinking out of it..

"I didn't have many options... he was sitting right beside me, literally forcing my hand."

I'm surprised I was allowed to say that much, but the magic was making my throat feel tight. I was walking a very fine line with that spell.

"Goddamnit, Ginny. I told you not to sign it," he says hatefully as he stands up and starts pacing. "Why would you fucking do that? You know I can't help you if he calls now."

"Stop yelling at me," I tell him with my eyes blinking with tears as I recall how frightening it was. "I didn't know what else to do. He's..." _Terrifying!_ My mind was screaming the word but wouldn't allow my mouth to say it.

"Now what?" he asks with his hands on his hips. "What if it takes longer for him to die, Ginny? He's the Dark Lord, he isn't exactly known for going out easily. I can't help you because you signed that. He's a step closer to canceling out everything I've done for you this year."

"I'm sorry," I whisper. "I didn't want to sign it. I didn't know what else to do!"

He rubs his face. "I have to make a reversal potion for the birth control you took. I can't wait fucking three months now for it to wear off."

"Wait... why?" I ask as I stand up.

"The only way I can keep my hold over you now is to get you pregnant," he says and I swallow hard as I shake my head. "And I only have a week to do it."

"I don't want—"

"It doesn't matter," he snaps. "It doesn't matter what you want."

He's horrible sometimes.

"There has to be another way. I thought you said you didn't want kids until later. I don't want have a baby with the world as messed up as it is. I can't handle it."

"Plans change, you made sure of that," he says and I start crying... just because I was already hanging on by a thread and I crumble against the bed as he paces about the room. "You won't have to keep it," he says softly as I try to wipe my eyes, but tears just keep coming. "I just need that first spark of conception," he says seriously. "You could abort it after that."

"Abort it?" I say in disgust, looking at him like I'd never seen him before. "You would want me to get pregnant with _your_ child and then just get rid of it like it never happened? Why would you even say that? What's wrong with you?"

He doesn't say anything for a while as he watches me cry and then he walks towards me. I flinch away from him when he tries to touch me so he sighs and kneels in front of me so I'm forced to face him.

"It was a stupid thing to say," he says as he goes to touch my cheek. "That's not what I want..." he exhales slowly. "This is all stressing me out and I'm trying to keep my thoughts organized. Don't cry," he says because I have yet to stop bawling like a baby.

I'm even starting to hyperventilate and he brings a hand up to my face.

"I don't want to make you cry."

I wipe my eyes again with the back of my hands and I try to catch my breath. "I just want things to be normal," I admit and he nods his head.

"I know," he says as leans down to kiss me. "There are so many things I want to do for you... There are so many thing I want to protect you from but I feel like my hands are constantly tied."

I hold his hand against my face. "I wish I was better... I wish I could be more like you but I never know what to do with these situations. I'm just... I'm so stupid."

"You're not stupid," he says firmly. I know it's a lie so I look away. "You're not stupid, Ginny," he tells me as he leans in to kiss my forehead. "Soon you won't have to worry about any of this," he adds as I lean in to hug him.

I feel his heart beat.

It makes me think of Mrs. Malfoy and what she had asked from me. For some reason I can't get the Dark Lord torturing Draco out of my head and I hold him a little closer.

"What is it?" he whispers against my hair as I cling to him.

"It's just..." I trail off trying to find the words I want to say. "I don't want you to get hurt."

"I won't."

"Draco..." I lick my lips. "You don't have to go through with this," I say as I think of Nariccsa and the earnest way she was looking at me. "I'm sure Harry will win.. Harry always wins."

"My mother made you talk to me," he says flatly and I open my mouth to respond, but he touches my forehead. "You're not blocking anything right now," he adds. "I can see it."

"Maybe she's right, though," I say softly. "I don't think I could stand it if you were hurt."

"I will not follow a half blood, Gin," he says seriously. "I will not follow a man who would take you away from me either," he adds, kissing my temple. "We deserve better than that."

He holds me for a while and we stay in silence as time ticks by... then we start kissing. Sweetly at first and more the more fiercely until he beckons me to lay back. Once I'm comfortable against the pillows I pull him on top of me, kissing his lips and running my hand along his arm. He pulls back a little so I can help him lift his shirt over his head and once his chest is bare I run my hand down his stomach.

When I get to his pants, I shift underneath him so I can help him unbuckle his belt.

I bite my lower lip as I try to get, but when he says my name I glance up to him.

"I can't be gentle with you tonight," he says seriously after a moments pause and I furrow my brows.

"That's okay..."

"No, babe," he says with a head shake as he puts his forearms on the bed so he can hover over me. "I try to be sweet to you," he says as he brings his hand up and runs his fingers down my profile. "I can't do that tonight."

"I think I can take it," I tell him because he's been rough before and that's nothing new. "I like it."

He looks down at me and bites his bottom lip. It makes my heart thump because... because he got that from me. I guess I'm rubbing off on him too and that thought pleases me.

"Just tell me to stop," he whispers before dipping his head down.

I guess I wasn't exactly sure what I was getting into.

He was being insanely rough.

He was going so hard like he never thought he'd ever have the chance to do it again and there was something almost desperate about his movements. He bit, he gripped, he grabbed, and he practically threw me around the bed as I tried to calm my breathing and enjoy what was happening to me. It was almost animalistic in a way and borderline brutal in it's intensity. It made me realize how much Draco held back when we were together before and I tried to just grit my teeth and bear it... but after half an hour of the constant roughness, I stilled his hips and gave him a lingering kiss as I folded my legs around his waist.

"Do you want me to stop?" he asked with labored breathing against my ear and I shook my head as I tried to calm my own beating heart.

"I just... I just needed a break," I tell him gently before kissing his shoulder and getting my bearings once again. We're both sweating terribly and it's making my hair curl. I lick my burning lips and nod my head as I close my eyes. "Okay," I whisper as I bring my hand up to his neck. "You can keep going."

He starts moving slowly again and then he takes my hands and intertwines our fingers, pinning them against the bed as he lets his head drop.

He takes my ear lobe between his teeth and tugs gently. Draco knows what that does to me and I arch my back at the feeling as he pulls back to smile at me.

"Your turn," he says sweetly as he bends down to kiss me and I smile against his lips as he slows his pace to something I find enjoyable.

When we were finished, I just knew I would have some fresh bruises, but there was an odd kind of ache that I didn't really mind. I always used him for my comfort and I couldn't be mad about him wanting to use me as well, even if he was a bit more... hard... for my taste. I love him and it had felt good. With that thought I turn on my side and kiss his shoulder.

"Do you feel better?" I ask him as I curl by his side.

He's sweating and he has his hand behind his head as he stares up at the ceiling.

"I do," he nods his head and he turns to me, giving me a long lingering kiss before smiling at me. "Thank you," he whispers against my lips.

I smile at him and prop myself up on my elbow so I can play with his hair. When it's wet it sticks up in any position I put it in and I spike it up in the front before he kisses my wrist.

"You're so handsome," I tell him honestly because he is and I sigh as he puts my hand on his chest.

His cheeks are flushed and he grins at me before he turns us so I'm laying under him again. He gives me another deep kiss and I sigh softly as I bring a hand up to his neck to keep him there.

"I love you," he says against my lips and I know he means it.

It surprises me every time he says it and I can't help but smile at him as I pull him close and open my mouth so he can slide his tongue along mine.

"Whatever happens," he says as he pulls back, only to rest his head on my chest to listen to my heart. I run my hands through his hair, combing through his strands so they stick up in an adorable way. "I don't want you to doubt that."

"I don't doubt it," I tell him because at this moment, I feel perfect in our relationship.

He hugged his arms around my body and I smiled as he sighed against my chest.

We lay like that in silence for a while and I look out the window as I run my fingers along his shoulders and back.

"I'm going to kill my aunt," he says softly and I furrow my brows, stopping my hands.

"What..."

"My aunt. Bellatrix Lestrange," he says flatly. "I'm going to kill her."

Oh.

"Um..." I lick my lips. I honestly have no idea what to say to that. "Umm..."

"You don't like that I'm so blunt about such serious matters?" he asks as he raises his head to look at me. His hair is still sticking up from where I was playing with it and it makes him look like a boy.

An adorable boy with so many twisted and deadly plans.

"I don't know what to think about it," I admit as I run my knuckles over his cheek.

He leans into my touch and then gets up on his fore arms so he's hovering above me. "She needs to go. Not only is she insane, but she's a powerful witch who will do everything to help the Dark Lord be successful."

"How... How does your family feel about that? Isn't your mother having her Christmas party soon? Is your Aunt invited?" I ask and he shrugs. "Will the Dark Lord know?" I ask worriedly. "I mean, if she's gone, he is bound to notice, right?"

"Eventually, but no one will find her body and I expect him to be dead after Christmas. Everything is moving now and we're in the final stages," he says flatly. "He won't have a leg to stand on after I'm through."

"And Harry?" I ask softly, not wanting him to get mad. "How does he factor into this?"

"He'll be coming to Hogwarts," he says seriously. "The Dark Lord is setting up a final battle to get rid of him once and for all, but with his inner circle out, it will be harder for him. The only thing is that Potter doesn't have an army to back him up against the countless Death Eaters that will be there," he bites his bottom lip again and I kiss him quickly before he continues. "Most of the Dark Lord's opposition has been put out and with the soulless masses in Azkaban... he'll have his own mindless army fighting against their left over loved ones. That's what worries me," he says as he narrows his eyes in thought.

I think of my trunk and the souls I have stashed there.

"I have something to show you," I tell him as I slide out from underneath him. I put on the peach robe again before going over to my trunk. "When I was with the Dark Lord... in that weird building," I tell him and he nods as he follows me. I kneel down and pop open the lid. "There was a room," I tell him as I move aside all of the clothes I had covering them. he drops to his knees by my side. "It was full of these," I tell him as I reveal the snitches.

I hold one up and hand it to him. It has Neville's name on it and he rolls it over in his hands.

"Can we put them back?" I ask with a brow raised. "Can we make them whole again? I know every single person in here would fight against Lord Voldemort," I tell him honestly. "They would all fight with Harry," he looks at me and I put my hand on his arm. "And you," I add for good measure.

He puts the ball back with the others and then he looks at me... he really looks at me closely and then he smiles and kisses me quickly.

"Brilliant girl," he whispers against my lips. He even brings a hand up to squeeze my breast inside of my robe. "I can separate these," he says when he pulls back and I leave the robe open just because... he's naked too. "I have access to Azkaban... I can get to the prisoners here before the battle and I can send Zabini to Hogwarts. This could work, Ginny. This was good."

I smile, pleased with myself. He looks back at the trunk and then he notices a black lacy bra that Ruth forced me to buy. He picks it up with a brow raised. "What is this?" he asks and I blush as I grab it.

"Ruth made me buy that too." I mutter with a red face and he smiles.

"Can I see it on?" he asks with a sly little smirk and I glance at him.

He raises an eyebrow.

"Turn around," I tell him as I grab it and the matching knickers.

"I just saw everything," he says with an amused grin. "It's not like it would be anything shocking to me."

"Just do it," I whisper as I push his shoulder.

He raises his brows before grabbing his boxers. I watch his back as he slides them on and I start putting on the lingerie. I have to adjust the straps on the bra and once that's in place I shimmy into the lacy black underwear. I was a little nervous for him to turn around so I glanced to the mirror to make sure everything was okay. I fix my hair quickly before adjusting my breasts one more time and then taking a deep breath.

"Are you almost done?" Draco asks in annoyance as I try to suck in my stomach.

"You can look now," I tell him and when he turns around I see his eyes darken as he takes me in.

"Wow..." he says and I felt a little pleased by his reaction.

I know he's seen me naked a million times over, but I felt sexier in pretty lacy things like this.

"Do you like it?" I ask as I run my hands down my stomach self consciously.

"Very much so," he says with a smile, the sad mood gone. "Turn around. I want to see everything."

I feel silly, but I bite my lip and do a slow turn anyways.

"It's just... it's really not me, though," I tell him as run my fingers over the hem of the knickers, knowing full well I'm on display for his watching eyes and I also know how much he likes that.

"You wear it well," he says with a smirk and I laugh as I cross my arms. "I might have to fuck you again."

"You say it like such a romantic," I tell him with a smile and he smirks as he crooks his finger to beckon me to him as he sits on the bed.

"Come here, then. Tell me what other sinful things you bought with the Dark Lord's blood money."

"Blaise's mom really has a particular kind of taste, doesn't she?"

"I would expect no less from her."

Thinking of her makes me think of Blaise... what he said about Ruth liking young men. I bite my bottom lip as I walk towards him and sit on his lap with my feet dangling above the floor.

"I have a question."

"Alright," he answers as he runs his lips over my cheek.

"Did you..." I trail off as I remember him saying that he's only slept with two girls before me... he never told me who it was.

God, no. I don't like where my thoughts are going.

"Did I what?" he asks as I fiddle with his watch.

I try to think of how I want to word it. "Did... like..." I can't think of the right words. Daphne did say that something happened years ago between Narcissa and Ruth... was it Draco? Ew. "Have you and Ruth..."

"Have we what?" he asks.

All I can think of is how beautiful Ruth is.

"Did..."

"Fucking say it, Ginny," he snaps at me and I lick my lips before looking at him.

"Did you sleep with Ruth Davenport?" I ask bluntly and he narrows his eyes.

"Why would you ask me that?"

"That doesn't answer my question."

"What does it matter to you?" he asks. "I would never cheat on you."

God, he did.

I stand up. "Draco, she's... she's old... how old were you?" I ask with a disgusted look on my face. "Oh, ew," I say as I shake my head. "That's... that's just wrong."

"I don't have to justify my sexual history to you," he says sharply. "It doesn't affect you in any way..." he trails of and then gives me a deadly look. "What brought this up? Did Zabini say something to you?"

I can't get the thought out of my head.

"Do you still have feelings for her?" I ask because... well, because she's just so perfect looking.

He snorts. "I never had _feelings_ for her. I was fourteen, Ginny. I hardly cared. I was just pleased that I was getting laid."

"Fourteen," I say in disbelief. "Jesus, she raped you."

"It wasn't rape," he says with an eye roll.

"She is old enough to be your mother and you were just a baby. That's... that's against the law!"

"It's over and it happened. It doesn't even matter..." he trails off and stands up. "It was fucking Blaise wasn't it? He was the one who told you that... That fucking-"

I don't get to hear the last bit of that because he stormed out of the room.

Where is he going?

I scramble for clothes and when I hear a door slam, I forgo clothes and just grab the robe as I go running down the hallways towards Blaise's room.

"You think I don't know what you're doing," I hear Draco hiss as I approach.

"Oh, my god. Draco, stop," I scold when I get into the room. His wand is out and Blaise is on the ground, bleeding from his nose. "What did you do?" I ask as I run in to help the obvious person in trouble, but Draco grabs my arm and yanks me back.

"You," he says, giving me a deadly look. "Do not go near him."

"He's bleeding," I say with a furrowed brow.

"Obviously," Blaise chimes in as he gets up and tries to stop the blood with the heel of his palm. "Thanks for pointing it out to the class."

"Get your father's potions kit and make the counter potion to Vernax," he says and I furrow my brows. He still has a harsh grip on my arm. "And you," he says, glaring down at me as Blaise gets to his feet to obey. "Go to your room."

"I won't be dismissed like a child," I tell him wriggling my way out of his grasp. "Stop talking down to me like that, Draco."

He inhales deeply, his nostrils flaring. I flinch back when he clenches his fist in anger.

I shy away from him and cross my arms over my chest as he watches Blaise start making that counter potion thing he was talking about with a fire burning in his eyes. He ignores me as Zabini scoops up some of the green potion into a small vial and he hands it to Draco with out even looking up from the cauldron.

"Drink it," Draco snaps as he approaches me with it.

"Is... Is this that thing you were talking about? That birth control reversal thing?"

"Stop questioning me and fucking drink it, Ginny," he snaps hatefully.

I take the damn thing and throw it on the ground. It shattered against Blaise's floor. "I am tired of doing things other people tell me. I don't want to drink that. I don't want to have a child right now. I don't want any of this!" I yell and Draco's eyes flame.

He gives Blaise a look. "I'm coming back later," he snaps harshly. "Make sure she drinks that fucking potion before I come back," he says before leaving the room.

Once he's gone, I look at Blaise, who's stuffing a napkin up his nose.

I wait a moment before going to him and putting his hand down so I can have a look. "I wouldn't suggest that," he says as I tilt his head back. "You heard what the general said."

"I'm not drinking that potion," I tell him as I grab his wand to see if I can heal his wound. "I won't."

"He could make you," he says with his brow lifted as I try to set his nose right.

"He could, but if he loved me he won't."

"Draco Malfoy doesn't think the way you do," he says and I nod... because that was the truth. "He loves selfishly," he says flatly.

I don't say anything to that.

"You would do anything to help the people you love, right?" he asks after I set his nose straight and I nod.

"I wouldn't be here if I didn't."

"If push came to shove, would he do the same for you?"

"Why do you say things like that?" I snap at him as I pull away after he's healed. "Just drop hints that you know mess with my mind."

"Maybe I'm more like you, Weasley. Can't say things outright."

"Whatever," I say softly as I hand him his wand.

He goes to the mirror and looks at my healing job before shaking his head and setting it again with another yelp of pain. "I am far too pretty to have a crooked nose," he scolds me as I sit down on his bed and cross my arms.

"Where did he go?" I ask worriedly as I look at the door where Draco left.

"I suspect to take a much needed walk," he chimes in as he cleans the blood from his face. "He was pretty pissed off if you didn't notice... and with a violet temper like that I doubt he wanted to stick around and kill everyone."

He goes back to the cauldron and uses another vial to scoop up more of that potion. I don't say anything as he sits beside me and holds it in front of my face. "Drink it," he says with a sigh. "I can't take another curse to the face," he says and then he looks me over, the peach robe slightly open because of the way I'm sitting. "It looks like you couldn't handle much more of his tough love either."

He uses his wand to open the robe a bit more by my neck and he makes a face at the mark left there after our shag session.

I push his wand away and close the robe so it's secured all the way up to my throat.

"He gets so angry," I say as I stare at the vial. "It's like his moods change so quickly. He was being so sweet just a little bit ago."

Blaise doesn't say anything.

"How did you know that he slept with your mother?" I ask gently.

That is what sparked this whole outrage anyways. I thought I should ask.

Blaise raises a brow and then leans back on the bed, using his forearms to keep himself propped up. "I caught them once, during winter break..." I make a face as I think about it. "The thing is," he says thoughtfully as he looks away. "Neither of them seemed to care that I saw it."

I crinkle my nose at the image and shake my head.

"That's disgusting," I say and he nods.

"Indeed."

"So if you're not bonded to him," I say, sending him a little glance. I stare at the blood still clinging to his nostril. "Why do you keep helping him?"

He sighs loudly and sits up straight again. "Sometimes, Weasley," he says as he hands me the vial. "It's best to throw your lot in with the lessor of two evils." He brings a hand up and touches my earlobe, holding it between his fingers. "Besides, he always gets the best things..."

I snap his hand away and stand up before he can finish that sentence. I'm going to my room. I've had enough of bastard Slytherins.

"Take it, Ginny," he says and I stop in the doorway to look at him over my shoulder.

He doesn't even turn around and I stare at his back before walking back to my room.

I set it on the nightstand and I sit on the bed, waiting for Draco to return.

He comes back just before dawn, and I feel him staring at me before he walks in and picks up the potion.

"Please," he says softly. "Please take it. It might just be a shot in the dark anyways... but please," he says as he kneels in front of me. "Please. I can't have him putting in his claim now. Not now. Please."

"I've never heard you say please so many times," I point out.

He stares me down and I put my hand on my forehead before taking the stupid thing and uncorking the lid. I can feel him watching me as I down it and then I throw the stupid thing across the room.

"When this is over," I tell him as he bends down to kiss me. "You need to start doing things I say from time to time," I tell him.

He doesn't say anything as he pushes me back on the bed.

I hesitate a second before I allow him open my robe.

"And no biting this time," I tell him as I put my hand on his shoulder.

He didn't bite me, but I would have traded one bite with birth control for the three times he had sex with me me that morning without it.

When he left, he took all of my hidden souls and I made him promise that he would do as he said... that he would bring my family back to me.

He replied that he would do that... that and so much more.

I could hardly find enough faith in me to believe him.

* * *

I wasn't feeling very good. My head hurt and I couldn't help the terrible feeling that was pooling in the pit of my stomach. It's that feeling you get as the roller coaster is slowly creeping up the large incline and you know any second it's going to drop and you're going to go with it.

It's nauseating, actually.

The Christmas Party at Malfoy Manor is, of course, an extravagant affair with silver and glitter and magic all over the place... only there were a lot more darker figures than I pictured such a jolly event having on the guest list. I'm standing by myself by a large bay window as I watch the girls from Draco's little group hang off the arms of the old and menacing looking Death Eaters.

I wonder if they kiss them... or have sex with them? Sex is always on the forefront of my mind it seems...

I have a constant ache between my legs now because I've been way over used in the bedroom. Draco has come to me three to four times a day pining me to the bed and spreading my legs in hopes of knocking me up because I signed that contract.

It's officially taken all the fun out of sex and my body is sore from the constant exercise.

Jeez, even an hour ago, Draco pulled me into his bedroom when I went to go to the bathroom and had me up against a wall.

I don't understand how he can get hard all the time. It's like he has the stamina of a rabbit.

I try not think about it and what it might mean for my future. I find I handle things best if I just pretend like it's not happening.

I make a face when I shift my legs. A little ache goes through me and I glare as I watch Daphne flirt with her troll of a suitor. I flick a glance around to find Draco. He's talking to his father across the room with his eyes following Bellatrix Lestrange as she skips about the room with her husband, talking about the Dark Lord in an overly loud voice to anyone who will listen. My stomach turns when she passes me and I turn against the wall a bit more, hoping to fold into the background.

It doesn't work very well for me. In fact, people I don't even know are coming up to me to introduce themselves. They all tell me I look pretty and that I'm a great asset to the 'cause'... whatever that is. I suspect they're sucking up to me and they would probably be a bit disturbed to realize I have no sway with Tom Riddle in the least bit so all their empty compliments are in vain.

I look around for Ruth to save me from the pointless conversation but she's at the center of the room, among a group of well dressed gentlemen, looking completely at home with a martini in her hands as she flirts with the men around her. I look away from her to the hostess, Mrs. Malfoy spares me a little glance before looking away.

I start chewing on my nails. I'm in a crowded room, but I've never felt more alone.

I grab a drink of some sort as it floats past me and I take a sip to calm my nerves. It tastes like peppermint and I lick my lips before taking another drink and looking around.

Why are we celebrating Christmas anyways? It's not like it's a happy holiday for anyone anymore and I take another bitter drink as I fold my arms across my chest. I've decided to hate Christmas this year... I might even boycott it, actually. Oh, and I might be pregnant because I drank that stupid potion my boyfriend wanted me to drink just because he said _please_.

Cheers to the new freaking year.

I exhale slowly and take another drink.

I spend most of the night on my own, watching as Pansy leaves early with her old man... Daphne goes next with her suitor... Millicent... Cho... and few others leave on the arms of older... scary looking, men and I furrow my brows.

Where are they going?

After a few more people come up to me to introduce themselves and tell me how long they've followed the Dark Lord, I've had enough and I push myself off the wall to find Ruth to ask her to take me home.

"Why ever would you want to do that?" she asks after I pull her away from the hoard of admiring men.

"I'm tired," I say and it's actually the truth. I want nothing more than to sleep.

"The night is still young," she smiles at me before picking up another martini. "Stay. Have fun. Make friends." she looks around. "Where's Blaise... he can dance with you."

"You never taught me any of these dances," I remind her flatly and she gives me another charming smile before ushering me away.

I end up by the wall again.

As the night dwindles down... the hall empties and all that's left is a drunk Ruth surrounded by the group of horny men. There are a few other clingers still hanging around but a majority of the guests have gone home for the night. Draco left with his father a couple hours ago and never came back and there's an old woman drunk on eggnog snoring away in the corner... and Mrs. Malfoy, who is looking on the display with disgust written all over her beautiful features.

She walks over to me. "Ginevra, why don't I set a room up for you," she says, watching Ruth Davenport like if she stared hard enough the woman would catch on fire. "You can sleep here for the evening."

"But..." I frown as I look at Ruth. I don't want to get in trouble with the Dark Lord because my 'mentor' is a drunk slag.

She claps her hands and a little elf with yellow eyes appears. "Show Miss Weasley to one of the guest bedrooms and make sure she's comfortable," she says and I open my mouth to respond but she holds up a hand. "I'll take care of it," she snaps.

I allow myself to get pulled out of the room and when we reach the large blue guest room I lay on the bed with out even bothering to take off my shoes. I am far too exhausted for that.

At half past four, Draco storms into my room.

"Here," he throws a cloak at me and turns on the light. He's looking a lot worse for the wear and his face is bleeding... in a few spots, actually. "We need to leave... now."

I don't even bother to respond as I put on the cloak as quickly as I can.

"What's happening?" I whisper, still half asleep, thinking he wants to fuck again. "What happened to your face?" I ask, feeling the need to touch him... heal him... before moving on.

"I knew she wouldn't go down with out a fight, but her mental problems made me forget what a good dueler she was."

"You killed Bellatrix Lestrange?" I whisper and he nods.

I have to run to keep up with him and we Apparate outside of Draco's Hogwart's passageway. His strides are long and angry as we go through the hidden tunnel towards the boys dorm and when he get through the fireplace, he grabs my arm and starts steering me like I was a child.

This all seems so sudden... I wasn't ready for this and I'm a little bewildered.

He should have kept me informed.

I look at Draco as he pulls us through the halls of Hogwarts. He has his hood up, but as he jogs down the stairs it falls back to reveal his profile. His eyes are narrowed and sharp and when I fumble on one of the steps, he grips my hand and intertwines our fingers.

"Pay attention, Gin," he whispers under his breath in annoyance once I get my footing.

I nod my head and follow him. It's hard to run in the heels Ruth made me wear, but I try to keep up with him.

When we reach the courtyard, he uses his wand to enlarge Apparation circles that he pulled from his pocket. I recognize them as practice portals that students use when they're trying to take their test to get their Apparating license. You can only get from one first circle to the next and they're always a few feet away from each other in the main hall so you can't break any apparating rules. We use them because you can't Apparate in or out of Hogwarts directly... I look at Draco as he places them around the fountain and I take a second to marvel at how smart he is. He's such a clever wizard. Blaise and Crabbe jog towards us after a few moments and Draco gives them a look.

Zabini nods his head.

"We were able to put them back. Those soul holders worked," he says and my heart leaps when I think of what that will mean. Neville... Seamus... their souls are back! "They're getting used to it now, but they should be prepared to fight in the next few minutes. The ones that we didn't have souls for are locked in the kitchen."

"Good," Draco says as he checks his watch. "The Dark Lord might call on them if he realizes what we've done. Potter should be bringing the others from Azkaban shortly."

I look back at the fountain and nearly scream in surprise when Cho Chang pops within one of the circles. She looks sick, like she's going to throw up, and when she looks at Draco, she nods her head.

"What does that mean?" I ask.

No one answers but when I remember Draco talking about taking out the Dark Lord's inner circle... it makes me think about his folders... and the names that were written on the back of pictures. That's the reason why the girls were allowing those older... disgusting... men to court them...

They were going to kill them.

Pansy comes next. She's holding her arm and when I go to see if she's okay, she waves me off. "He woke up before I could curse him,"she says with a hiss as she moves her arm to reveal the cut. "Terrible aim, though."

"He's gone?" Draco asks and Pansy nods as Blasie starts to mend her arm. "No one was alerted?"

"Not even an elf," Pansy says and then she hisses as Blasie uses his wand against the wound. "I would have killed him with out an order," she says nastily. "You should have seen the way he was pawing me all night."

Daphne comes next, looking pale and shaken, and then a few more of his female friends apparate to us, half clothed and shaking like a leaf, but nodding in confirmation that a terrible task had been completed.

"His inner circle is almost gone now," Draco whispers as we all stare at the last circle still unoccupied. "He won't have a leg to stand on when he comes to kill Potter."

"Who's missing?" I ask softly as I give Daphne a hug to stop her trembling.

"Millicent," Pansy says with a brow raised once Blaise is done with her arm. "She should be here shortly."

We wait.

And we wait.

"Did something bad happen to her, do you think?" I offer and Draco shakes his head.

He checks his watch again and then after a few moments, his lip curls back in a hateful sneer. "She had better come..." he snaps.

I guess that's bad.

I feel something tickling my neck, so I scratch it.

As we wait, the feeling doesn't go away and I blink a few times before I feel a pull in my chest. I turn and start walking... walking without a thought like I had no say over my actions. When the group notices that I've wondered off, I can hear them calling to me... but it's very faint... like it was lost in a fog. I can't control my movements. I'm like a zombie walking aimlessly towards the front gates.

I can hear people calling my name from behind as I pick up speed and start running. I have no idea where I'm going or why I'm going, or when I'll stop and I feel a tug in my chest when Draco commands me to come back, but a faint tickle was all it turns out to be. It has no hold over me any more and I can feel the panic behind me as I finally reach the gate to the waiting arms of darkness.

* * *

I dream of Tom and skipping behind him as we play hide and seek in the castle at night when the world is asleep. I dream of the room of requirement and a thin woman kneeling at the center of a mess of junk staring up at me with cursed eyes.

"Just a squib," Tom says as he comes up behind me with his hand on top of mine, clenching our fingers around my wand. "Family disowned her... all that jazz," he whispered and I could practically feel his breath against my ear even though he was hardly real yet.

He was just a ghost and I was just a girl who was in way over my head.

"She was in the forest," I answered because my mind could remember seeing her living in a tent in the forbidden forest where no students were supposed to go. I remember seeing her there when Tom was showing me how to do dark magic... How to make animals do as I say without anyone knowing the difference and how to make them scream.

"Hiding out," he tisks his tongue. "Free loading off wizards and witches," he adds.

"We should tell someone," I say and he nods his head against my shoulder.

"Indeed we should," he says thoughtfully. "Or, we could do something much greater."

"What's that?" I ask softly. I was young. So young. Too young and my mind was being twisted and warped and turned over into something completely not my own.

"She can make us stronger," he says as he lifted my hand, making me point my wand at the comatose woman on the floor. "Don't you want to be strong?"

"Yes."

"Don't you want the word to love you?"

"Yes," I whisper.

"Don't you want everyone to pay attention to you? To finally realize how grand and wonderful you truly are?"

I nod my head.

"Don't you want to please me?"

"More than anything."

"Good, then let me in," he said and I closed my eyes.

When Tom would possess me, it was like watching a play from seats high in the rafters of a theater. I could hear what was happening and if I tried hard enough, I could see it, but I could hardly do anything about it. I heard the woman scream, I saw the jet of green light leave my wand... I heard Tom laughing as I cowered against the back of my mind and I _felt_ his power.

It was the greatest feeling I ever felt.

When I finally came to, Tom was more solid in form and he was standing over the woman's dead body, tapping his hand against his lips as he looked around the room.

I knew what had happened. I knew what I did, but I just couldn't wrap my little mind around it as Tom used his strength of solid form to sort through boxes and cabinets that were stacked on top of each other about the room.

"Keep that feeling, Ginevra," he says as he throws things over his shoulder. "Keep feeling empty," he says as I put my hand on my heart.

It was fluttering so fast I feared it might explode.

"There you are," I heard him say and when he comes back into view he's holding a small head band of sorts. It looks like a crown for a princess with a large blue stone in the middle surrounded by diamonds.

When he approaches me, I do nothing but stare at him as he puts his hand on my chest and literally pulls something out of it.

I don't know what it was, but it felt like my whole body was being torn apart and I fell to the ground as he picked up my wand to do some complicated looking magic with it.

"This is a very treasured artifact," he said after he was finished and he helped me to my feet after the hole in my chest filled itself up. "Now, you will be like me," he says as he places the crown upon my head. "Little Ginevra Weasley," he says with a soft smile. "You are a powerful witch. It is no surprise that I was handed to you, little one. Only you could bring me back so successfully," he says as he pulls me towards one of the large mirrors, covered in a dusty sheet. "I will need you."

He moves the sheet and dust flies up around us to reveal my reflection. The mirror doesn't show Tom. But it shows me, a terrified eleven year with old a beautiful crown on my head.

"You are now like me," he says as he looks at my refection. He puts hair over my shoulder to reveal my small neck. I was a freckled little thing and I just stared wide eyed with out moving as he moved his hands down my arms. "You will never die," he says as he pets my back. "You will age until twenty five and stay there, watching the world age with me."

"Why?" That was all I said, that was all I could get out and he laughed.

"Because," he said and as he traces a vein on my wrist with his cold fingers like he was tracing a map. "Your blood is important."

He always said that.

He looked at the reflection again and I glanced at him as he smiled. "Queen Ginny," he said with a mocking laugh.

"Why?" I questioned again.

"Your blood will keep me relevant," he said as he brought my wrist up to his nose where he inhaled deeply like one would a fragrant flower. It made me shiver. "But, alas, you are not as powerful as I am," he says, letting my arm drop.

I frowned at him and his clever smile.

"This is the best part," he says as he takes the crown from my head to return it to it's hiding spot. "Your soul is not as hard. We're connected now, in ways we have never been connected before. If someone wants to kill me," he says, waving the crown. "Then they will surely kill you. Unlike me, you can't survive if it were gone," he laughs. "You're too weak in that area. It's such a beautiful tragedy, is it not?"

"That sounds terrible," I whisper and he smirks.

"We're immortals now. Isn't that pleasing?"

When I wake, I wake to Draco gently stroking my cheek and I sigh in relief when I see him.

"Bad dream?" he asks with a brow raised and I lean up to kiss him firmly against the lips.

"Always," I admit before laying back against the bed.

He gives me a devilish smile before his hand disappears between my legs. "What are you doing?" I whisper softly as he starts turning on my body. I'm not wearing anything from the waist down so he had pretty easy access. "I thought we were..." I trail off and blink when he dips his fingers inside of me.

Weren't we doing something before... this?

Was that all just a dream?

It did seem to be moving at hyper speeds...

"Hush now," he says before bending down and silencing me with a kiss.

"Can't we just sleep for a little bit," I plead because we're _always_ doing it now. "Please, babe," I whisper as I put my hand in his hair. "Can't we just rest for a little while? I'm still sore from before."

He laughs. It's a deep, throaty laugh. "I am sure you are," he says with amusement in his voice. "But you can rest later. I need you now."

_Fine_.

I relax my body, happy that the seriousness seems to be gone and I sigh, letting him manipulate my body for what's about to happen. As always, my body gives into his advances after a while and in my need, I reach for his belt. I start undoing it haste-fully as his fingers slip in and out of me.

"You are awfully willing now," he smiles as I work at his pants. "Aren't you?"

"I spend a majority of my time being willing for you," I joke with him and I reach inside of his trousers once I have them open.

He's solid in my hands and when he rolls on top of me to start, I notice he has all of his clothes on. I spread my legs for him and pull back so I can unbutton his waist coat. He grabs my hand and pins it to the ground.

"That's hardly fair," I tell him with a brow arched because I want to feel his skin against mine.

"There's not enough time for that, little one," he says and I lean up to kiss him again, holding him there with my free hand as I snake my fingers through his hair.

It's not an opened mouth kiss and I frown as I pull back. "Kiss me," I whisper softly and he pauses a second before bending down to meet me halfway.

He deepens the kiss with a vengeance and it takes my breath away as he consumes me with it. When he pulls back, my lips burn and he smiles down at me, his silver eyes twinkling. I lean in to kiss him again as he lines his body up with mine.

"Look at me," he says as he pulls back. I smile and do just that, looking into his eyes as he slowly enters me. I bite my lower lip and hold my breath until he's all the way in.

He always feels so good.

He finally breaks eye contact and lets his head drop by mine as he starts moving. I bring my hand up to run down his back as I wrap my legs firmly around his waist. It's getting so hot in here and I start sweating as his body works against mine with quick movements.

I close my eyes and hold him a bit closer as each thrust jolts my body with a pleasurable hum.

"Oh, babe..." I mutter when he hits a very sensitive part of me and I arch my back as I tug on his hair a little.

He bites my neck in retaliation and I smile a little to myself from the pain.

He makes an odd noise after while... an odd noise that kind of sounds like a hiss and I open my eyes.

"What did you say?" I whisper against his ear as I let one of my legs drop.

"I wasn't talking to you," he says as he takes the fallen leg and pulls it up, resting it in the crook of his elbow. It allows him to go deeper and I make a whimpering noise because it hits that perfect spot.

"Who were you talking to then?" I ask as I crane my neck so I can see, but he grabs my hair and forces his lips onto mine.

"No one," he says flatly after pulling back.

I roll my eyes at how foolish he is before I use all the strength that I have to turn us so I'm the one of top. I give him a smug smile as I lower myself on top of him and I run my fingers up his clothed chest.

"Aren't you burning up?" I ask as I go to his buttons again, but he stops me with his hands firmly on my wrists.

"I said no," he says sharply and I furrow my brows at the serious and harsh way he just spoke to me.

That's nothing new to me. Draco gets especially on edge when we're intimate and I nod my head. "Okay," I whisper softly and he lets my wrists go.

I settle my hands back on his chest and I start moving again. We were having sex, after all. I should get back to that.

"I'm so hot," I say again after I pick up speed and then I quickly take off my dress, throwing it behind me before going back to him.

I lean down to kiss his neck and I move his hands to my back. "Take off my bra," I tell him.

I want to keep him involved. He laughs a little and it takes him all of two seconds to undo the hooks. I lean back up and let it slide down my arms. I throw that behind me as well and then I go back to him.

He's looking up at me with a little smile on his face.

A very pleased smile like a cat who just ate the mouse and I want to kiss it off of him. In fact, I do and he brings his hands up to clench around my waist as I bite and then tug on his lower lip. Usually when I'm on top, Draco puts his hands between my legs and kind of... helps me along. He's not doing that right away, so I take his hand and place it there because I_ need _it.

He laughs again as he starts moving his fingers where I need them to be moved. "You know exactly what you want, don't you?" he says with a smug grin.

"I had a good teacher," I tell him with a smile.

I lean down to kiss him again, and then I feel something hard against my hand on his waist coat. Something is in his front pocket and I furrow my brows. I pull on the chain it's connected to and out comes a pocket watch. I stop moving and eye it curiously as I pop it open.

"When did you start carrying this?" I question.

"We're not having a chat session right now," he says as he takes it and snaps it shut. He rolls us so he's on top again. "No more talking," he orders as he slams into me.

It was such an electrifying feeling and I've never felt anything like it before. When I felt a burning sensation on my left hand, I went to take a look, but Draco grabbed my face again and forced a harsh kiss against my lips.

"I like that," I say as I bite my lower lip when he's done claiming my mouth, almost like I was in pain. It wasn't pain I was feeling.. it felt amazing and I wanted him to keep it up. He was jerking his hips at a different angle... and it was the greatest thing I've ever felt. "Don't stop," I whimper as I grip his shoulder and fist his shirt in my hand.

I look up at him, tears forming at the corners of my eyes because the feeling is so intense. For a moment, blond haired turned jet black and then blond again, like an image slightly out of focus. I shake my head and I lick my lips before bringing my free hand up to fist in his hair. It feels shorter in my fingers than I remember it being, but I shake that thought off because it's silly.

"Lovely little Ginny is enjoying herself," he says with a sly smile.

I can't bother to respond.

I'm right on the edge of climax and when it finally comes I kiss Draco firmly as I moan into his mouth. I arch my back and almost push him out of me because the feeling is so intense and it almost kind of hurts because my whole body is now so sensitive. I don't, though, I prolong the moment, and I can feel a tear leak from the corner of my eye as I ride it out.

After I'm finished, I rest back and close my eyes, basking in the after glow as he continues to move on top of me.

He's not finished yet and he keeps going... I open my eyes to stare at him, to smile at him, but I stop myself because it doesn't seem right... there's something about him that seems _off_ and I figure it must be because of the powerful orgasm I just had.

I blink as his features start shifting... they start changing... his hair... black... I blink away and shake my head... black hair... He looks down at me, sweat starting to gather on his brow... gray turns to... turns to... red...

Draco turned to Tom... Tom smiled at me...

I was shocked awake and when he continued to look down at me with that cold smile curling his lips, I realized all too soon what was happening to me.

It was real. This wasn't a dream and it wasn't Draco who was about ready to cum inside of me.

He was on top of me... he was _in _me...

"Stop," I push at his chest, trying to get him away from violating my body anymore then I had already allowed.

How could this happen... how could this...

"Someone woke up from my spell," he whispered against my ear. I felt dirty and I started fighting him as he held my hands down. "You were much more compliant a moment ago. I think I even had you moaning."

"Stop!" I scream as I try to buck him off.

I can't help but feel completely panicked right now. I can't believe I'm having sex with the Dark Lord. I can't believe I had allowed it to get this far, curse or not.

"Hush," he says in my ear as he grabs my hands and pushes them into the ground.

We're not on a bed, or a couch, we're on a ground and I look up to see where we are. I can't place the room right away but when I see the tall empty ceilings, I know... It's that weird building at Folk Hills. That weird building where I saw him murder Delsia and the unicorn. Clubhouse five.

I look back at him again, his red eyes flecked with black.

I need to fight.

Fight.

"Get off!" I yell. Trying to arch my back as I feel tears well up in my eyes. How did this happen? It was like being possessed again. "No. Get off of me!" I scream loudly as I try to wrestle against him.

"Stop fighting. I'm almost finished," he says and I shake my head.

No, no, no. I didn't realize I was saying it out loud until he covered my mouth with his ice cold hand to silence me.

"Don't be rude," he snaps. "You had your fun, now it's my turn."

My thoughts are all over the place, I just keep trying to fight, but he's stronger and I can't... get... up...

"Don't make me curse you again," he hisses against my ear, making me shiver. "I could make you_ love_ it again. _Oh, babe..._" he mocks my words from before when I thought he was someone else... someone I loved... "_Kiss me. Don't stop._"

I don't want that either and I try not to throw up or pass out as I damn my own body for being weaker than his.

"You don't have to be weak," he whispers, taking the thought from my mind.

He drops his head by my own with his hand still firmly pressed over my mouth and he hammers into my body a few more times before he's finished. He rests his heavy body against mine for a few moments and I let tears leak from the corner of my eyes. He's still fully clothed and his tie clip is digging uncomfortably into my sternum. He licks my neck one more time before pulling out of me and I just stare at the air in front of my face as he gets up and rights his pants.

Did this really happen? I bring my hand up to my neck where he licked and I pull back. Blood coats my fingers and I glance at him because I'm waiting to wake up from this dream.

But deep down I know it's real.

"Well, that does have it's merits," he says as he tucks in his shirt. He lifts his hand and a silver mirror appears before him as he buckles his belt. "I feel much more relaxed now. They say it's a great stress reducer," he says as he combs his fingers through his hair while he eyes his reflection with a pleased grin on his face. "You have completely messed up my hair," he adds as he straightens it and I bite my lip.

God, it really happened.

I can feel _him_ still inside of me and I suddenly come to as I scramble to put on my knickers and dress once more. They had been discarded a few feet away from me and I quickly put them on as I try to ignore what he left between my legs and the implication of what that means.

"You could be great, Ginevra," he says as he straightens his collar. "I don't understand why you resist it. You could have stopped that if you wanted," he says as he motions to the floor where it happened. "You could have done so much, but you didn't because you're a coward. Or..." he trails off and gives me thoughtful look from the magic mirror. "You wanted that to happen."

"I didn't want that to happen," I tell him harshly as I stand and cross my arms protectively over my chest. I feel like taking a shower and scrubbing between my legs until all traces of him are gone for good. "You said you cursed me."

"I did," he nods his head. "And you broke that curse rather easily which is quite a feat. You know how powerful I am," he says darkly as he tightens his tie. "I've made great wizards kill their whole families and not remember it in the morning. You have squandered potential."

I hate that I seem to be watching him groom himself and I look towards the door.

"But that's all you did. With our forces combined we could be amazing together, Ginevra," he says off offhandedly like he didn't just... rape me. "I don't know why you can't see that. It's so irritating how childish you are. Stop being such a coward about it."

He did rape me, right? I slept with him under false pretenses.

I was cursed.

That's rape?

Rape.

It was hard to think about.

With another shock to my system I remembered the freaking potion Draco made me drink and what it would do. I looked at the Dark Lord as he prepared himself and I almost threw up. I couldn't let this happen. I couldn't have his child. I didn't even know if a body made of magic could produce something as such, but I don't want to chance it. I need to get to my school trunk. I need to get to that velvet bag of potions Ruth had given me.

I look at the door again before making a run for it. When I throw it open, I don't see land or the pathways of Folk Hills. I see water... like the ocean, trailing far and wide as the eye could see. I freeze as I stare at it. I can't swim and I'm terrified of deep water but even if I wasn't... where would I go?

"What magic is this?" I ask softly and then I look over my shoulder at Tom as he stares at his reflection like a vain thing.

"I'm the most powerful wizard in the world, Ginny," he said my name like it was a joke. "I didn't get to where I am today by being painfully _average_."

I feel my hands shaking as he stares at me.

"Come, I want to show you something."

"No-" I barely got the word out of my mouth before he snapped his fingers and magic unlike anything I've ever felt before clenched around my stomach and lurched me back towards him until we were standing side by side in front of that ghastly floating mirror.

"Stop being so difficult," he chastises as he pulls me until I'm standing in front of him. "You should be honored to be in such close vicinity to a great wizard."

I would snort if it wasn't so serious.

He reaches into his pocket and pulls out his wand. I hold my breath, thinking he's going to curse me again... but he didn't. He preformed a spell I didn't know and a record player appeared by our side. When I gave him a questioning look, he smiled and put the needle on the record. Music started to play, big band music from an older era that was hard on my ears.

"When I was your age," he says as the piano, trumpets, cello's, violins, and all other kinds of orchestra instruments invade my ear. "There was a war going on as well," he says and a singer comes on in a deep and throaty voice... _It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that swing..._ "Muggles were killing each other left and right with guns and bombs and gas."

His lip are close to my ear and he puts his hand across my stomach.._.. It makes no difference if it's sweet or it's hot... _

"I had a hell of a time in Germany," he says with a smile against the my ear, the music moving in the background, echoing off the walls. "When people die during war, no one seems to care very much. They all just blamed the man with that terrible mustache," he says with an amused smirk. "I was able to hone my skill," he says as he taps his fingers against my stomach, like he was keeping time with the music. "It's funny how so many magical persons in our world claim to love muggles so much, but they didn't dare lift a finger to help them when they nearly destroyed each other. Everyone has an agenda, Ginevra," he adds darkly. "Remember that."

I swallow hard.

…_.Just give that rhythm everything you've got..._

"When I tortured my first muggle," he says, his breath hot against my neck. "This song was playing. It always seems to put me in the mood," he says with a little smile.

…_. It don't mean a thing..._

"Now it's our turn for war. Now it's my turn for victory."

…_.if it ain't got that swing... _

"It is wonderful, is it not?"

The music keeps playing like some kind of demented circus and I can't help but ask."Why?" I whisper as I think of his hand covering my mouth as he... did that terrible thing to me. "Why did you have... to do... that to me?" I knew it wasn't for his own amusement. I knew it couldn't just be for the sex and that made me even more uneasy.

I put my hand across my stomach and try to tell myself that it's not my fault even though I feel like it is.

If it was war he wanted, having sex with me was pointless.

"Draco Malfoy isn't the only one who knows how to do a bonding spell," he says and my eyes widen at my reflection. He smiles at me. "The foundation of our union was made long before he was even a thought in his parents mind. It was a silly thing for him to try," he says against my ear and I want to flick him away... but he's not Draco... He won't just scold me or glare... he just might torture me for it. "I can't have that. You know how important you are to me," he says with a cruel smirk as he puts hair over my shoulder.

I feel sick.

How will I ever tell people about this? How could I ever admit that he... did that to me.

Draco would probably never want to touch me again and everyone would look at me differently.

I feel disgusting.

"It will end tonight," he says seriously as he looks in the mirror, studying my terrified face. "Potter... the Order... all the little rebels within my own circle who were foolish enough to go against me. My power will be absolute after tonight," he says as he taps the mirror. "And you shall stay here, where you can watch as I kill every single person you _love_," he says seriously. "Afterward, I imagine you will see the world differently. Perhaps you will finally realize what the implication of being with me means."

I swallow hard and when he puts his palm against the mirror our reflections vanish, revealing the front hallway of Hogwarts, showing before us like a picture.

The record changes and a new song emerges. Another old song from a forgotten decade. _...Would you like to swing on a star..._I hate it. I want it to stop_...carry moonbeams home in a jar..._

"You have a front row seat to the battle, little one," he says against my hair as he uses his hand to switch the picture to another area of the school, where students are running, screaming, as Death Eaters throw curses at them.

The song keeps playing. It's light subject matter and pleasant music in stark contrast to the images I'm seeing.

"You should pay attention," he says as he moves to another area, by Hagrid's old cabin where I see Luna Lovegood hiding with Romilda Vane behind a pile of dirt. "This will be a turning point in history," he whispers. "This will be when I stomp out all opposition... This will be a historic day," I can feel him smile against my neck and then he steps back.

"What is this?" I ask as I look around the mirror.

"I've had the security charms installed earlier in the year," he says seriously as I move my hand across the mirror. With each movement a new area of the castle is revealed..._by the way if you hate to go to school..._ "Nothing could hide from me," he says as I pass the Head Boy room. Draco is there... glaring as he speaks to Blaise Zabini... his face still a mess of gashes and blood. "Even the things people wanted to hide." _….You may grow up to be a mule..._

"Draco..." I trail off as I say his name.

"The thing Draco Malfoy fails to realize is that no matter how absolute you think your power is, you will always have a traitor who rats you out."

Millicent.

I feel hatred boiling in my heart when I think of her.

That's why she didn't show at school. It has to be...

"Speaking of rats," he says as he snaps his fingers. A short fat man comes limping into the room carrying a wooden box and a black cloak. "Ginevra, meet your new friend Peter Pettigrew, or as he's better known as... Wormtail."

I knew him. I knew him instantly. I knew him because Harry had told me... I knew him because he had lived as a rat on my brother's shoulder for years. I knew him because he was a traitor to the Order.

I hated him.

He was the worst kind of traitor and he was the reason why the Potter's were dead... why Harry's life was hard... Why the Dark Lord was able to return to power... He was the worst of all evils.

The Dark Lord grabbed my chin and forced me to look at him.

"I wish you could see how great you could be under my tutelage. I will never try to hold you back. I would never squander your potential like the countless others who claimed to love you did. I will never make you be less than what you're intended to be. You could be a powerful witch, Ginny. I'm not afraid to admit that and if you follow me... swear allegiance to me, I could give you the world in return. I won't treat you like a child or like a porcelain doll with no brain. I will treat you with respect."

That's rich, after what he just did to me.

"I only ask for your respect and loyalty in return." He puts his hand on my stomach like he was hoping that something was forming there already and he smiles at me. It was a hateful and cruel smile that made me sick. "My Ginevra," he says my name, his voice sounding darkly seductive and darkly like Tom Riddle in the chamber. "How you've changed so much."

I wait until he drops his hand and then I let out the breath I was holding.

"And you will continue to evolve and change. You will see," he says, smirking at me as Wormtail helps him into his cloak. "You will do the right thing eventually. Every one will come to see things my way in the end. You just wait."

He left after that, going out the door where the water was so high it reached his knees... and he was gone in flash. After he disappeared, I was left with the greatest traitor of all and I glared at Wormtail as he glared right back at me.

"What's in the box?" I ask, trying to think of a clever way to get around him and out of here to help my friends and family.

"Something you don't need to be concerned about," he says, flicking a glance down to my stomach.

"Why?"

"Just because you have all of a sudden catapulted yourself into _his_ good graces does not mean that the rest of us, who have put in the blood, sweat, and tears," he says, showing me his silver hand. "have to bow to your requests as well."

"Don't you?" I ask, playing it up as I put my hand on my stomach for added affect. "I'm sure you will be very sorry for saying that to me."

I held my breath for a response and then he started to laugh, his double chin jiggling with the movement.

I hear a scream and I turn back to the mirror quickly, ignoring Peter Pettigrew and his horrid face.

The battle is heavy and I feel very useless just sitting in this fucking room. I go towards it and put my hand on the surface, moving it to the side so I can see the rest of the castle. People I know... People I love are dueling and I can hardly watch it as they fight and dodge deadly curses thrown at their chests. I see my father fighting a rough looking Death Eater who has facial scars and I smile a little to myself to see the fire in his old eyes.

Draco got to them. Draco put them back together... only to turn around and fight to the death.

I can't watch it anymore and I turn the mirror again until it lands on the front courtyard of the castle. People are screaming and the crowd parts when Voldemort, in all his dark and evil glory, appears out of thin air. He looks like a tragic hero all dressed in black in some twisted fairytale.

The record changed again and another song started back up as I watched the carnage before me.

_... You must have been a beautiful baby... _

The Dark Lord is fierce with his wand and I cover my mouth when I see it.

…_. You must have been a wonderful child..._

I've never seen anything like it and I start biting my nails as he kills everyone in his path with a flick of his wrist, never once breaking a sweat over the power he's using.

…_.When you were only starting to go to Kindergarten... I bet you drove the little boys wild..._

Mad eye moody, one of the roughest wizards I know goes down with a curse aimed to his chest. I can't believe this is happening.

…_. And when it came to winning blue ribbons...you must have shown the other kids how..._

"Oh, my God," I whisper as he sends a curse to Professor Sprout that takes off her head.

…_.I can see the judges eyes... as they handed you the prize... _

Wormtail comes beside me and elbows me to get a look as well. "Do you see how great Our Lord is," he whispers in awe as he watches his boss take out half the castle.

I see countless people, adults and students alike, fall victim to his wand.

…_.I bet you made the cutest bow... _

He's a powerful wizard. There was no denying that and I have never feared more for Harry or Draco than I do at this moment.

This was _real._

I take a deep breath as he reaches into his pocket and I step away from Wormtail to see better as the Dark Lord pulls out a small metallic ball that shines with the fireworks of curses being thrown.

I know exactly what that is and I take a step closer to the mirror see what he's going to do with it. I watch with wide eyes as he throws it into the air and then he aims his wand right at it and blasts it with a curse that looks like black smoke.

The ball explodes and the brightest light I had ever seen burns through the mirror. It hurts my eyes and I back away and shake my head to make the dots go away. When I come to again, I look back at the mirror. The image of the castle is back, but the Dark Lord is the only thing standing. Everyone within walking distance seems to be on the ground, their skin charred from whatever dark curse he used with the contained soul to kill them.

…_...You must have been a beautiful baby... _

I hear more blood curdling screams as the Dark Lord looks over his shoulder. He looks up for a moment, right where my view is...and I swear he smirked at me before traveling into the building.

…_.'Cause, baby, look at you now... _


	18. Chapter 18

The record player kept going, playing those old songs as I watch the battle from my hidden spot at Folk Hills.

It wasn't just wizards and witches in the battle... it was all kinds of dark creatures. Trolls, spiders, dementors, house elves... they were all fighting on each side and dying because of it. I spotted Hermione and Ron in the third floor bathroom, disappearing into the chamber with a small golden cup. When they returned the cup was gone but they both looked wide eyed and red faced as my bother held onto a series of basilisk fangs.

I wish there was a view from the chamber. I want to know what they just did.

I spot Harry by the room of Requirement where he met up with his two greatest companions. They disappear into the room and afterward, I can see Draco and Blaise go in as well. They were in there for a while... almost too long and I couldn't stand it anymore.. I turned the mirror again and I watched as people I knew... people I loved... were dying... hurting... running for their lives.

I can't take it anymore... I should be there to help!

I send a sideways glance to Wormtail. He's off to the left now, picking his teeth with his metallic hand as the music echos off the wall, covering up most of the screams from the battle.

"Why aren't you there?" I ask him as I try to think where his wand might be stashed. If I can get it away from him, I can get out of here. "Does your Great Lord not trust you enough to fight on his side? Afraid you might turn coats like you did to the Potters?" I ask and his lip turns up in an ugly sneer.

"I am a very capable wizard, highly regarded by His Grace," he snaps. "But I have been assigned a very important task that I don't need to explain to you!" he shouts and I look at the box under his arm.

"You're my babysitter?" I ask spitefully, trying to belittle him and it's working because his face is getting hot. "How highly he must regard you to watch a defenseless teenage girl."

"You know nothing," he says, sending me a look like I was dirt on the ground. That's rich, coming from the man who pretended to be vermin for thirteen or so years. He cradles the box to his chest and sneers at me. "The Dark Lord trusts me above all else!"

I snort and cross my arms. "Hardly," I say with and eye roll. "What's in the box?"

"You have no authority here," he says and I hear the people crying again so I glance at the mirror.

I see Tonks get blasted against a wall and I feel the fire in my veins.

"What's in the box?" I repeat as I take a step closer to him.

"Step back," he snivels at me and I glare.

I take another step closer and he removes his wand. I nearly smile when he sees it as he points it at my chest. The record player starts to skip, replaying one word in the same song over and over again as I approach him slowly.

"I said step back!"

"You aren't going to curse me, are you?" I ask softly. There are a lot bigger and badder people in the world. I refuse to be afraid of a person like Peter Pettigrew. I take a step closer. "I doubt that would keep you in_ his_ good graces."

"You know nothing, you stupid girl!" he hisses at me.

He takes a step back and the box fumbles in his hands. I take the distraction to lunge at him. I grab his wand hand, and he drops the box as he tries to wrestle with me. He's much larger than me and he has a lot more pounds on his frame than I do, but I try to use what I have in my favor.

We fall to the ground as I try to pry the wand from his fingers, using my agility to wiggle and move around. Our magic is coursing through us and it's shooting off random spells to the ceiling from the tip of his wand.

I almost have it out of his sweaty hands by the time we roll to our sides. He cusses and spits at me as sweat starts to gather on my brow. I... almost... have... it... I bite his wrist and then he brings his knee up and slams it right into my stomach.

It knocks the air out of me and my fingers slip from his wand as I roll away from him and curl into myself to deaden the pain.

Fuck, that hurts.

"No," he whispers to himself, seeming panicked as he hovers above me. "You're fine," he says as he touches my arm. He's sweating and a few beads of his sweat _drip_ onto my arm.

That's my breaking point.

"Get the fuck away from me!" I hiss at him angrily as I clutch my stomach.

He scrambles to get away from me and then he starts apologizing over and over again, begging me not to tell the Dark Lord.

If I ever see the fucking Dark Lord again, you can bet I'm fucking telling.

I inhale deeply and go to stand up... .that's when I notice the noise.

It's like an odd little girl scream and I furrow my brows as I get to my knees and look around. I finally focus on the box Wormtail had been clutching so closely. It's laying open on the floor and inside is a sparkling crown with a blue sapphire set in the middle. That's where that noise is coming from and I frown as I get to my feet, still holding my stomach, as I start to walk towards it.

Why is it making that noise... and why have I seen that before?

"Harry Potter is dead!"

My neck snaps to the mirror when I hear that sentence and my heart falls. I run towards the mirror again, forgetting that damn thing in the box as I put my hand on the surface to turn it a million times so I can figure out what's happening. People have stopped fighting on both sides and I think there's an announcement going through the loud speaker because the female voice is cracked sounding, like it was filtered through a speaker.

"Let us all lay down our wands and join our new Lord in the courtyard! Any drop of magical blood spilled is a tragedy..." the voice goes on, but I can't seem to hear it as I try to make sense of what was just said.

Harry can't be dead.

He's Harry. He's doesn't die... he's the boy that lives!

"Our Lord has prospered, like I knew he would," Wormtail says as he stands and picks up the screaming box, snapping the lid shut, leaving us with just the skipping record player. "When we wake tomorrow, the world will be brand new."

"Stop talking," I hiss at him in a low and dangerous voice.

He obeys and I would have smirked a little if I wasn't so devastated. People started to gather in the courtyard and I watch as people I know and love look full of despair as they wait for the Dark Lord to come back from the forbidden forest... a place my magical mirror could not see.

Eventually, the Dark Lord and a majority of his army come back into view... along with Hagrid who's tied with ropes and chains... and in his arms... lying limp and dead... is Harry Potter.

I cover my mouth again and tears sting my eyes.

Any hopeful thought I ever had about the war seemed to have come to a stand still as I watched the progression to the castle. I felt my shoulders slump even more when I saw the gloating face on Lord Voldemort as Nagini slithered triumphant by his side.

I'm never going to escape that mad man.

I feel like crumbling to the ground, but I'm too stunned to move... and I don't want Peter Pettigrew of, all people, thinking I'm so weak.

"They deserved it, you know," Wormtail says thoughtfully as he watches the Dark Lord make a speech about greatness of the wizarding world and urging the rebels to join his ranks. A few cowards throw down their wands and run towards his army, falling in line and bending their knees in submission.

I feel like someone just ripped out my heart and ate it for dinner.

"For thinking they were so much better than me... so much greater..." his lip curls back again and his eyes are glassy, like he was stuck in a memory that was all together unpleasant for him. "And look at what I've done. I've brought back the greatest wizard the world has ever seen and now they're all _dead."_

He starts to laugh, a loud and annoying laugh.

"Dead!" he says with a grin like a pleased school boy. "All of them dead and _me,_ the one they thought was the weakest... alive! And honored by his lordship."

God, he's pathetic.

I turn back to the mirror as he places his metallic hand on it and starts sifting through the images as the Dark Lord starts talking to the rest of the war torn people in the courtyard, mocking them and burning the dead with fire. I can practically smell it from here as the black smoke billows in the air.

I see Draco with his face covered in ash and blood standing... standing next to my father... and I cover my mouth again just because I can see that, he too, was surprised by the turn of events.

Wormtail turns the mirror, going over the rooms and corridors of the castle as Tom's dark voice booms through the halls.

I can see the dead people that I had loved, their bodies pale and bloody against the floors.

"Remus... Siruis... James... All dead!"

He's laughing so hard that he didn't notice the door to the club house open. He was too busy gloating to see it.

But I did.

To my utter surprise, I see a man in a wheelchair in the door frame, blocking out the light behind him so he falls into silhouette. I only know one wizard to use one of those and I feel something like hope stir in my chest as he makes himself known. Abarax Malfoy rolls himself into the room, wearing a brown tailored suit and matching fedora as Wormtail hisses hateful slurs at him.

When he sees me, he smiles and put his hat on his lap, ignoring Wormtail.

"Hello, Ginevra," he says pleasantly like the only hope in the wizarding world didn't just get snuffed out. He looks at Wormtail with the same pleasant smile. "Oh, and the ruffian is here as well. Joy to the world," he says with a smirk and I give him an odd look as he pulls out his wand. "Did you all hear the good news?"

I nod my head... feeling the sob get stuck in my throat.

After all, I really don't know what side Abarax Malfoy is on. Their family dynamic is so different than mine that I wouldn't be surprised if they were all fighting for different sides.

"Potter is dead!" Wormtail yells. "The Dark Lord has achieved his goal and those who have remained loyal will be rewarded. Money can not buy that!" he says and Abarax rolls his eyes and gives me a private smile like Peter Pettigrew was a simpleton who couldn't be helped.

I look at Wormtail, the corners of his mouth are white with dried spit and I can't say that's too far off.

"Your blood traitor family will be slaughtered!" He yells and Abarax nods his head.

"Yes, indeed," he says coldly. I feel my heart clench at the thought. "I'm afraid that will come to pass... Of course, that will only happen if Our Lord captures them and you know how slippery my Lucius can be, " he says with a laugh, like it was funny... like it wasn't a serious threat.

That shuts Wormtail up rather effectively but I don't care. I turn back to the mirror to see what's going to happen next. If my family is going to be okay... If Draco is going to be okay...

I can't tell now. The smoke from the burning bodies is blocking my screen. I start turning the mirror to see a different angle but nothing is showing up and I feel frustration make my heart hammer.

I want to know what's happening!

I clench my fist and resist stomping my foot. I just keep on turning the mirror to try to see something when I notice the jet of light behind me. When I snap my neck to the side, I see Wormtail get a whole chest full of curse from Abarax's wand and he goes flying back, smacking against the wall with a sickening crack of bones. My mouth falls open with surprise and I look at Draco's Grandfather, frozen to my spot.

"Rebellion is for the young," he says as I give him a wide and questioning look. "But treachery," he says as he puts his hat back on. "Now, that is for the old like myself."

"What?" I whisper softly, confusion lacing my voice as he smiles at me.

I see so much of Draco in it that it hurts my heart.

"Apparently cripples and the feeble minded," he says, nodding to Wormtail, still knocked out against the wall. "Aren't allowed to fight in any great battles. So I'm here to escort you."

"To where?" I ask softly, hope soaring in my chest for the first time in days.

"Home," he says with a smile and my heart warms over. I almost run to him to hug him, but I hold myself back. "Until the Dark Lord is defeated."

"But... Harry is dead now," I say softly and he shrugs.

"But my Grandson is not," he counters. "Wars are not won in a day, Ginevra," he says gently. I nod my head and look towards the box that Wormtail dropped. I should take that as well. I walk towards it as he continues talking and I bend down to pick it up. "It takes time. There is more than one-"

A shot of green light blasts right by me. I snap my head up and watch as hits Mr. Malfoy right in the chest. The blasts throws him back, making him fall out of his chair and his body thumps to the ground with a sickening crack of bones.

Oh my God.

I drop the box and run over to him, kneeling by his side as I tentatively touch his chest. His eyes are open and staring ahead of him in a flat stare. I try to find his pulse on his neck, but I feel nothing.

He's dead.

Wormtail.

Fury rises in my chest and I look over my shoulder at Peter Pettigrew as his hand shakes around his wand. There's blood dribbling from his nose and his complexion is a sickening shade of green. I don't even say anything my anger is so fierce and I pick up Abarax Malfoy's wand and I point it right at Peter Pettigrew and his stupid rat looking face.

I want to kill him... I want to kill him so badly but I just can't, so I turn my wand to the pillar beside him and blast it apart. The rubble falls on top of him and he screams loudly, but I don't even care as I run to the door. The water is still there, but now I have a wand and I jump in before Apparating.

I land right in front of the castle of Hogwarts and I start running towards the courtyard. As stupid and rash as it is, I don't care. I just want to see my family again... I want to hurt Tom Riddle.

As run up, I end up right behind the hoard of Death Eaters who are standing behind Tom Riddle on the bridge to the castle. He's still talking, giving a detailed speech about a better tomorrow as I weave my way through the dark cloaks and hateful sneers. I even use my wand to send a few of them flying off the bridge to their certain death below.

When I get close enough, I can see Hagrid to the side and I can see Harry's feet dangling from behind his large form.

I swallow the cry in my throat as I push against Death Eaters. I have the wand clenched in my right hand and when I get close enough, I lift my wand right at the back of Tom's head.

The movement didn't go noticed, of course, because before I could utter a spell, a Death Eater grabbed my arm.

"My Lord!" the tattletale in the silver mask grips my arm so hard that it burns.

Tom looks over his shoulder curiously and then he smiles when he sees me, like we were old friends about ready to reunite.

"Ginevra Weasley," he says as he walks towards me. He snatches the wand from my hand with out a fight and then he runs it under his nose, like he could smell who it belonged to. "Abarax Malfoy," he says thoughtfully as he tucks the wand in his pocket. "That family has turned out to be my greatest disappointment."

I hear a roar of the crowd behind us, and the Dark Lord snaps his head to Hagrid. Harry has jumped from his arms and I feel my heart leap in hope as he falls to his feet like a cat pouncing.

He's calling to Volemort now and then, as quickly as it started the first time, the battle comes back to life. I was pushed aside and I fell to the ground as magic started to blast around me. I crawled backwards, my skin scrapping against the rubble as I tried to find a safe place to hide to get my barrings.

Harry's alive.

That one thought alone puts fight back into my system and when I find a rather large stone that had fallen from the castle, I hide behind it and try to catch my breath.

Harry's alive. Hope.

"Ginny," I hear my name being said and I widen my eyes as I turn my neck to the right.

Charlie... "Charlie!" I yell with a smile as I jump up and pull him to me in a tight hug.

I haven't seen my favorite brother in so long I barely believed he was real. A nasty curse has caused boils to grow on his right forearm and he cringes when he pulls back.

"It's so good to see you," he says, grabbing the back of my neck and kissing my forehead. "Jesus we thought you were dead... or worse."

I nod my head knowing exactly what worse could be because it happened to me earlier. When the Dark Lord used a curse to look like Draco... to... to do that thing he did... I hold Charlie's hand against my neck for a moment before a blast from a nearby curse makes a rock nearby explode. Charlie pushes me down and covers my head.

"Come on," he says as he takes my arm. "If I can get you in the castle... to Mom... she'll take you home."

Home.

I nod my head. I don't care to fight now. I want to see Mom.

He peeks his head out from around the rock and then he clenches his hand around my arm. "Now," he whispers and I follow with out question.

Curses blast at us from all sides and Charlie uses his wand to deflect the worst of it. As we run through the courtyard, I see Romilda Vane, dead on the ground from a binding curse to the throat. She still has scratches from her fingernails along her neck, trying to get the curse from strangling her.

I see Remus' dead body still bleeding from a wound to the chest...Some kind of Dark Creature is eating the flesh from his leg and Charlie kills the thing with a blast of red light. We run past Pansy' father who's struggling with a festering wound in his stomach and beside him is a dead spider the size of a muggle car.

There was so much blood shed I could hardly wrap my head around it.

"There's a medic station in the Great Hall for our side," Charlie whispers as we run through the front doors of the castle that have been blasted off of their hinges, splintering the wood. "The wards are strong," he adds.

I see Slughorn slumped against the stairs, half of his guts spilled out and falling around him like bloody ribbons. I stumble on one of the steps and fall down sharply on one knee as my wide eyes take in the terrible image. I feel the bile in the back of my throat as I stare at him with out blinking.

"Just don't look at anything but me," Charlie says once he notices my hesitation on seeing such a sight. He grabs my face and forces me to look at him. "Just me," he says and I nod my head.

I watch the back of his copper colored hair as we run, trying not to see the terrible outcome of the battle that litters my peripheral vision.. Charlie was a meaty man, tall and broad in the shoulders, and even though I know this was a war won by magic, not brawn, I couldn't help but feel safer in his company.

He was a dragon tamer after all... He could tame the worst of Death Eater's as well.

Or, I just like to think that.

When I was really little... I can remember sneaking into his room late at night when I was afraid and finding comfort from his strength. Ron was always such a scardy cat in the middle of the night and he would slip into our parents room and sleep in between them, leaving no room for me. So Charlie became my safe haven.

When there are so many children in one family, the older siblings always seem to fill certain rolls the younger ones need but can't get from their busy parents. Charlie was like a substitute father to me at times.

I love him.

I miss him.

I squeeze his hand and he glances at me as we run up the second set of stairs, headed towards the Great Hall. He gives me a sad little smile and squeezes back.

"Your nightmare will be over soon," he says and it makes me think about all the times I ran into his room, scared from my dreams... Even before the chamber I had a terrible nightmares. "I promise."

I nod my head, my voice getting stuck somewhere deep down in my body.

Right before we enter the Great Hall, Charlie stops me with his arm across my middle, making me fall back from it's suddenness. Something was off and he sniffed the air for a moment before raising his wand.

"Get down," he whispers and I obey immediately.

I crouch by the wall and cover my head as three Death eaters run towards us with their wands blazing.

Charlie starts fighting them off with deadly curses and he takes one down in the matter of seconds before another runs up to take it's place like a hydra. Charlie is a great wizard and his curses hit home multiple times, but there are too many of them for one wizard... even I can see that.

I crawl towards one of the fallen Death Eaters and pry the wand from his dead fingers.

I'm so over the horrors.

I throw a curse to one of the men in a silver Death Eater's mask and it hits him in the chest. He cusses and then his attention turns to me.

"Ginny!" Charlie yells at me, but I don't listen to him as I help his duel.

We take down the rest of the duelers after a long fight and one of the men managed to take a chunk out of my arm that caused me to scream so loud I'm sure the whole castle could hear it. Charlie killed him quickly and then put his hand on my face.

"Let's go inside," he says, nodding to the Great Hall as he glanced at the missing flesh of my arm that was hurting so badly I thought I was going to die.

We turn to run, but right before we reach the well warded door, a cloud of black smoke appears before us and we both stop short.

When the smoke clears and I see who it is, I feel my insides ice over with fear.

I was _almost_ there.

I was almost safe.

I feel like crying.

"Where are you going?" Tom asks with his dark brow raised as he looks right at me, like he was looking deep into my soul. "I hope you don't think you would be able to get away from me that easily. I can find you anywhere, Ginevra."

Charlie steps in front of me and pushes me behind him. I shake my head and try to move around him because, after all that I've seen, I know Charlie is no match for Tom Riddle. No matter how great I know my brother to be, I know that the Dark Lord is greater.

There's no use denying that fact.

"Leave her alone," Charlie says in a deep and courageous voice and the Dark Lord smiles at him, like a cat ready to play with the mouse.

"Really?" Tom says as he taps his wand against his lips. "That is very sweet of you to try to help, but you're wasting your breath. Judging by the hair color I can assume you're related, yes?" he asks, looking over my brother's shoulder to catch my eye.

I don't respond.

"I will give you this one out," he says, giving me a charming smile like he was doing me a favor. "Run. Run now, boy, and your life will be spared from my wand."

Hearing Tom call Charlie _boy_ seemed ridiculous, but I couldn't get over the fear that had seized my heart. That was a good deal. A great deal my brother needed to take.

"Run, Charlie," I whisper as I reach forward to embrace his hand. I know what the Dark Lord can do and we have his undivided attention right now. Charlie doesn't stand a chance. "Run."

"Listen to your sister, _Charlie_," Tom says with a smirk. "And perhaps you may survive this battle."

"I'm not running and leaving my sister with a tyrant like you."

"Tyrant?" the Dark Lord snaps and the venom in his voice makes me flinch. "I am hardly a tyrant. But... if it's a tyrant you want..."

He lifts his wand and I can see it coming. I push Charlie to the side and deflect the curse quickly, much to the surprise of Volemort, who raises his eyebrows.

Then he starts laughing.

"You will have to do much better than that, my sweet, to stop me."

"My sweet?" my brother says in disgust as I redden in embarrassment.

"Didn't you know, _Charlie_?" Tom asks cruelly as he takes a step closer to us. "Your sister and I share a very special bond," he says with mirth in his eyes as he leers at me, no doubt remembering what he did to me earlier.

I feel like I need to take a shower again and he smiles when he sees me cross my arm over my stomach.

Charlie doesn't bother with a response as he lifts his wand to throw a curse at the always diligent Dark Lord.

Tom deflects it and, with the same swish of his hand, rips the wands from both of our hands. I barely have time to blink as he shoots a curse right to Charlie's chest to kill him.

"No!" I scream as he falls to the ground, the green from the killing curse still burned into my retinas. "No!" I scream again as I run to kneel beside him, only to get tugged back by Voldemort. "No!"

His strong arm snakes around my middle, flushing me against his chest. "No!" I was sobbing and I fell limp in Tom's arms as I kept repeating that word over and over again as I stare at my brother. "No..."

"Hush now," Voldemort whispers against my ear like I was being silly about the matter. "Come, I will have someone take you home," he says and I scoff at the word coming from his lips. "This is no place for a lady and I have a teenage boy I must kill again."

He lifts me easily and my rage returns as I look at Charlie, huddled on the floor. Dead.

"No," I kick to get out of his arms and he lets me drop to the ground, landing painfully on my knees. I get up and start running as he laughs, telling me to run all I like because he will get me in the end.

He always gets me in the end.

I sprint down the stairs, flames from the nearby torches flicking far into the air as I run.

One of the towers collapses on top of the trolls outside as the windows shake and shatter down the hall. Green flames start to eat up half the castle as I blast Death Eaters across the hall with sobs in my chest. Bones crack and crunch with each step of my feet.

Blood. Flames. Sweat. Tears. Blood. Flames. Sweat. Tears.

Screams.

Screams.

Screams.

Screams.

Darkness.

I make it all the way to the courtyard and I can hear people yelling my name as I try to find myself again. Trying to focus as the world around me spins and blurs in front of my eyes. I hear my name once more and I turn to my right. I see Draco running towards me, my tunnel vision bringing him into focus as he calls my name.

Then he stops short and his eyes narrow at something directly behind me.

Then I feel the pull around my middle once more, a familiar icy arm around my waist, as a wand gets pressed to my neck.

"I told you I would catch you," Tom whispers against my ear, his voice low and dangerous with hate. "It was only a matter of time."

He shoots a curse right into my neck and I slump in his arms.

Darkness.

Darkness.

Screams.

When I dream, I dream flying. High and far above an ocean of blood.

* * *

When I wake up, I find myself in an unfamiliar bedroom that has deep green curtains and a small fireplace against the opposite wall. I get up quickly to survey my surroundings at a more agreeable position and I cross my arms over my chest as I back myself against the wall.

It was just a plain old bedroom, nothing too grand or too suspicious about.

I try to remember what happened last... How I ended up in this place.

The battle of Hogwarts. Charlie dying... Draco running towards me.

I stand against the wall for a while, letting my despair over take me as I remember all I had seen and all that had been done to me. All the blood... so much blood... Sobs wrack my body into a sniveling mess of tears and snot with my grief over what I had lost. After ages of crying, I find my resolve once again. I stand straight, on my guard, and I try to find out where I am.

After deciding there are no threats visible in the room, I look down at what I'm wearing. At the battle, I was still wearing the dress from the Malfoy Christmas party... some pleated cranberry colored thing that Ruth picked out...

I wasn't wearing that now, though. I was wearing one of those thin night slips and I put my hand up to my mouth when I realize what that meant.

Someone had changed me while I was blacked out... someone... I lift the slip... someone had changed my knickers too.

That made me very... very...very uneasy. My skin seems fresh and clean and my hair smells like strawberries... I run my hand over my right arm where that curse had taken a chunk of my flesh, but it was gone... it was healed and not even a scar was left to make it real.

I look around the almost too perfect room again and realize something.

I have to get out of here.

I run towards the door. It opens easily and I pause in the hallway to take in my surroundings. It was just like any other hallway in a grand house... but it wasn't like Zabini's mansion or Malfoy Manor... it was a different home all together and as I tentatively walk though the halls, I kept up my guard.

Thoughts of Charlie, Abarax Malfoy, and the countess others I had lost during the battle swim in my mind.

I wish I had my wand...

I grab a candle stick from a nearby table and hold it up like a Quidditch bat. If I can't do magic, I can sure put up a good fight. I'm tired of being the victim in my own story and waiting for someone else to save me. No one can save me but myself, I've decided.

I sneak down the hallway, waiting to hear voices to give me a clue to where I am... but the house is silent. The place is bare. In fact, a lot of the rooms don't even have furniture in them.

The house has an odd smell to it as well... like fresh paint and newly cut wood...When I was young, my parents added a new level to our house to give Charlie and Bill their own rooms. That smell was in the house for months...

I don't see anyone and when I get down stairs, I look out of one of the front windows. All I see is a large velvety green lawn as far as the eye could see, surrounded by a gathering of trees far away from the house, making a wall of wood to keep people out... or people in for that matter.

I frown and then go to the front door with the candle stick held loosely in my right hand. I hesitate one moment before bringing my hand out to the knob and turning.

It doesn't open. I guess, deep down, I knew it wouldn't.

I go over to the window and try to pry it open. It refuses to budge and I inhale a deep breath before picking up the candle stick and bashing it against the glass.

It bounces back, like the window was made of rubber, and I hiss in pain when my arm twists oddly from the impact. I try again on another window, only to have it do the same thing and I bite my lower lip with a hand on my hip as I try to figure out what I should do.

"The miss can never leave."

I jump and look over my shoulder in surprise. There, standing right behind me, is an albino elf wearing a tea cozy dress. I thought for half a second that it was Zabini's elf, Franklin, but upon closer inspection, I realized that this creature in front of me was of the female variety... even if her voice sounded like a deep dark pit.

"What?" I ask stupidly as I clutch the candle stick once more, ready to strike.

"The miss can not leave," the elf says, her voice low and raspy like a life long smoker. "The Master of Lords does not permit it."

"But..." I lick my lips. "Where am I?" I ask, changing my tactic as I scoot back against the door, checking the corners of the hallway to make sure no one can sneak up on me.

"This was not a magical house," she says, her tired eyes taking me with disdain. "The Master has made it a wizard's home now and gotten rid of all the muggle filth," she says and I furrow my brows. "Faun is to show you where you eat, sleep, and change, and then you is to by yourself."

"By myself?" I ask and she nods her head, her large ears dropping with the movement. "No one else is here?"

"No visitor, no owls, no leaving," she says and then she turns her back to me and beckons me with her hand. "Faun will show you now. It is time for breakfast."

I pause a moment before following her. I'm not exactly sure what my next course of action is, so I follow with the candle stick still in hand. When we get to a large drawing room with ornate golden carpets, Faun... I guess is her name... waves to a set of book shelves set into the right side of the wall.

"The miss can read," she says and I almost snort. I guess I won't be entertaining any guests in this room, after all.

That leads up to the dinning room, which is a bit smaller than the one at Zabini house, but still big enough to be intimidatingly beautiful. The windows are large and let the sunlight in and there's another fireplace... not big enough to be a floo connected one, but it still had an elaborate looking marble mantle that had cherubs and 'R's molded into it... Above the mantle it was uncomfortably empty, like a photo or painting had hung there once but had eventually been taken down... and never replaced.

In fact, it made the whole room seem off and when I finally see the warm food still steaming on the table, I raise my brows.

"This miss will eat now," Faun says and I make a face.

"I'm not hungry," I admit and Faun shakes her head again, her purple eyes bugged out in anger.

"The Master of Lords says the Miss is to eat every meal!" she yells and then she snaps her fingers.

The chair that I was standing beside suddenly creaks to life and I give it a surprised look before the elf uses her magic to push me into it.

"What are you doing?" I snap. I can't believe a house elf is treating me so roughly.

She snaps again and the arms of the chair comes to life and fold around my waist like a chain that was binding me.

"What is this?" I ask as I try to pry the arms away with my fingernails. "Stop this!"

"Eat."

"No! I'm not hungry!"

"Eat!" she yells at me and I give her a look because of the way she's talking to me.

"I will not."

"Fine," she says and then she pops away. I fight with my chair captive and claw at it until my fingers bleed.

She doesn't come back and the arms begin to tighten around my midsection, making it hard to breathe with each creak of it's wooden arms. It's starting to hurt too much, so I pick up my fork and take the first bite of eggs in hopes that it will loosen it's grip.

The arms loosen.

Another bite... more room to breathe.

By the time my plate was finished, the arms were back in their original place and I looked at the elf when she popped back into the room with her bony arms crossed.

"Now Faun will show you your room."

"I think I can find it on my own," I say in a deadly voice.

"No, Faun will show you."

Fuck off, Faun, I think darkly in my head but I don't want to be out magicked by a house elf again, so I follow her up the stairs to the room I had woken up in. She goes over to a wardrobe and opens it. All of my clothes are there, hanging and sorted by color.

"Where's my wand?" I ask and Faun shakes her head.

"No magic for Miss."

Of course.

"What about the rest of the things in my trunk?" I ask, thinking of my notebook and the velvet bag of potions.

"They are in your drawer," she says, pointy a knobby finger to a desk along the wall.

I go over to it and open up one of the drawers. There's my notebook. I pick it up quickly and open it to the middle. I sigh in relief when I see my words are still in there. The elf says something about leaving, but I don't care as I start sorting through the other drawers. Then in the bottom right one, I find the bag Ruth Davenport had gifted me.

I sigh out loud as I take it out and then I dump the small vials on my bed once the elf leaves.

Thank god.

I pick up the birth control and down it quickly. I will take NO chances now... Would it work if I was already pregnant? I'm sure I'm not. I couldn't... I would know, right?

I pick up the one that will abort a pregnancy and I read the back. One dosage is the whole bottle and it will kill the fetus at any stage in the womb. I make a face as I imagine that... What if it was Draco's baby? I would never kill something that I made with him... but Tom...

My stomach turns and I place my hand over it.

That didn't feel good.

It turns again and I drop to my knees with one hand on the bed to support myself as I let my head drop. I start breathing a little bit heavier and then... and then...

I cover my mouth and run to the bathroom.

The potion I just swallowed starts to come right back up along with most of my breakfast. I drop to my knees in front of the toilet as I heave and make odd choking noises until all the contents of my stomach are expelled. I can see the gold of the potion throughout the mess and shake my head weakly with sweat drenching my face.

No.

No.

No.

I throw up one more time before I slump against the floor, exhausted and burning from what I just did. Why did that happen? I wasn't feeling sick.

I look towards the toilet once again and I cringe.

Did that mean the potion... did that mean the potion won't work now? I only had one bottle!

After I calm myself down I lift off the floor and flush the mess. I wash my face and I brush my teeth quickly before going back into the bedroom.

What now?

I sit on the bed and take out my notebook and a pen. I start writing about what happened at the battle. I leave out the rape at Folk Hills... because I can't... I can't write that down. It makes it real. It makes it solid. I shake my head and start writing down the people who I had seen at Hogwarts. All the Order members who had died... my brother...

Tears swim in my eyes again, but I push them away.

I cry too much.

I keep going until I pass out from exhaustion and when I wake in the morning, I take a shower that lasts for hours.

After scrubbing my body raw, I realize something very troubling.

No matter what I do... no matter how many times I wash or clean or bathe my body... no matter what... I was always going to feel dirty now.

And it was_ his_ fault.

* * *

The days mash and fold together in a long continuous stream of nothingness. The books in the drawing room were hardly entertaining... most of them are books about purebloods and the importance of genetics in the creation of magical children.

It was ridiculous and I didn't want to read any of those damn things. I never saw Faun again, but a bell would ring for each meal, breakfast, lunch, dinner and like Pavlov's dogs I would respond to it readily.

I ate everything placed before me because I didn't want to chance getting trapped by the chair again and I knew that I wouldn't be permitted a snack later because there was actually no food in the kitchen. I found that out when I finally found it on a lower level. In fact, there was nothing in the kitchen and I started to wonder where my food came from. Who made it and how did they transport it here?

There was no getting out of here... I tried. I tried each day only to fail and fail again.

I was getting terribly lonely. All that I had was my notebook and it would keep me company as I wrote down my story in striking detail because I had the time to do so.

I wonder sometimes, if this is what my life will be. I will be forever in this house... forever alone for the rest of eternity.

Sometimes I wonder if I actually died during the battle of Hogwarts and this was my own personal hell.

That thought makes me sad.

I traveled every inch of the house and found nothing of interest, that was, until today when I found the hidden door to the attic. It was hidden behind a very out of place wardrobe in an empty wing of the manor. I just happened to peek behind it and saw the hinges of a door.

It's taken me hours to move the damn thing and I'm sweating like a madwoman by the time I have it scooted far enough away to get to the green door it was hiding.

I open it, it wasn't locked, and I smile to myself as I start up the narrow stairway. There isn't much up here, honestly. I see a few bits of furniture covered in sheets and a couple of white boxes with lids covering them from debris.

I uncover a wing backed chair and pull one of the boxes towards me as I take a seat. Inside is nothing really interesting... just old photographs of people I don't know and ancient looking receipts handwritten on yellowed paper. Who ever this family was they were loaded and bought the most expensive things imported from France and the America's in the early twenties and thirties.

A name on one of the ledgers stopped me for a moment and I furrow my brows as I read it a few times.

_Riddle._

That was too close to be a coincidence and I start to comb through all of the boxes of the prior muggle owners of this house with a fever until a find a muggle photo of a man who looks suspiciously like Tom Marvolo Riddle. It makes my heart stop, it's so dead on. It sends back violent memories of the chamber of secrets and I start to have a panic attack as I put the photo down and clench my eyes shut.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

After a few moments, I finally get myself under control and I open my eyes to look at the photo again. It has the name 'Junior' written along the bottom in spidery handwriting and I lick my lips before stuffing it in my notebook.

Half blood... Draco had called him that time and time again... and now I knew why.

It was true.

There were a few wooden chests that held the papers and personal belongings of a another muggle family called the Wrigleys. I suspect they lived here after the Riddles because the dates were a little later on their papers. A teenage girl named Mary had lived here during the sixties and she had a whole collection of records that were in an old milk crate hiding under one of the tables.

I brought them with me downstairs and listened to them on a record player I found in one of the bare rooms on the lower level.

Most of them were soundtracks from musical muggle films and I would listen to them with my eyes closed, pretending like I was living in one of their stories, dancing and singing and enjoying life.

That was about as interesting as the house got and the time flew by slowly... a loud ticking clock above the fireplace in the drawing room is the only thing that lets me know that time moves forward.

It felt like I would be stuck for years alone the house, until a large Death Eater named Yaxley came to receive me one night while I was writing by the fire. He has a nose that looks like a pig snout and his presence frightened me because he looks so firm and serious.

He tells me to put on a nice dress.

I didn't even question it.

I refuse to wear something that was bought with the Dark Lord's money, so I pull out the red polka dot dress my mother had made me for my birthday.

I had hated it then, but now I feel like it's better than any armor I could have. It makes me remember who I was... who I am still, and the death eater raises his brows at me when I come down the stairs in it and a pair or riding boots just in case I have to run.

I look at Yaxley and his unfortunate appearance as he Apparates us to a large manor house surrounded by a few large lakes.

I look up at the unfamiliar home as I swallow hard. Why was I being dragged here? What was the purpose? With dread in my stomach, I'm pulled inside and into a dinning room. There was quite a spread of Death Eater's in dark robes with the Dark Lord keeping house at the head of the table.

I feel sick again.

This was all too similar to a very vivid nightmare that had terrorized me in my youth. I'm made to sit at the other end of the table and Yaxley pours red wine into the glass in front of me, over shooting it and spilling some wine on the white table cloth. I send a shy glance around the table as I try not to tremble like a frightened little girl... but deep down I just want to hide under the table and never come out.

The Malfoy's were no where to be seen, of course. They were officially blood traitors in the eyes of the people I was sitting around. I see Wormtail at the end of the table, his body swollen and bruised from the tumbling pillar. I was hoping he would be dead, but there he is... sitting there... eating a greased leg of some kind of bird. I feel the anger boiling in my heart again and then I sense someone's stare so I turn to Tom.

He gives me an amused smirk and he winks at me.

I look away quickly, a blush staining my cheeks. The other people left from the Dark Lord's original inner circle are Millicent's Uncle Damian, who sat to the right of the Dark Lord with a piercing gaze. Crabbe Sr. and Gregory Goyle's parents who looked hard pressed to speak at the moment because they look so pale.

My stomach twists in knots as I look around me. His inner circle was dead, but there were others who would readily take their spots and every seat was full of dark and menacing looking witches and wizards... including the Carrows. Alecto smiles at me as I glance at her so I quickly look away.

What was the meaning of all this?

"Ginevra," the Dark Lord says my name and I look over the display of food to see him at the other end of the table.

He's wearing another dark three piece suit made of a material that almost looks plum when the light catches it just right and he's drinking a glass of wine that he lifts in my direction.

I swallow hard... this is all too close for comfort. My dream... my nightmare... becoming a reality.

"My beautiful, my sweet, my darling..." he says mockingly and the others laugh.

I know they aren't terms of endearment coming from his heart. He doesn't have a heart. He's just making fun of me in front of his raving fans and my cheeks heat in embarrassment.

"It is so good to see you again. How are you liking your new home?"

I don't say anything. I can't.

"I imagine you love it," he says with a smile. Wormtail laughs around a mouth full of food and I give him a disgusted look. "I do hope that you aren't ungrateful. I could have sent you back to that pathetic shack your family called a home," he snaps and everyone laughs again.

I would rather be there than anywhere in the world right now.

He hisses something. The door opens and his snake slithers into the room. When she gets by me, she runs her body across my foot.

"Oh, how Nagini has missed you," he says as I cringe.

Nagini's tongue feels around my calf and I clench my eyes shut before she slithers to the other side of the table... by _him._

"You are looking well," he says, giving me a once over that makes me want to melt into the background. "I see three square meals a day have really made you look more healthy. I dare to say that you are_ glowing_. There is nothing less attractive than a skinny woman made of bones and skin."

They all agree, the mindless masses, and I lick my dry lips as the Dark Lord watches me. It's uncomfortable to have his undivided attention... and it's made even more uncomfortable when the others notice his long stare.

Suddenly, his attention shifts to a long and lanky Death Eater who has a rather round ended nose. The man produces a letter from his breast pocket and hands it to Tom.

I watch, fear making me shake, as his sharp eyes scan the page and then he crumples the letter in his hand.

"It looks as though Malfoy Manor is still unattainable," he says with a grim smile as he throws the letter behind him.

It hits the floor and rolls away towards the fire.

"Abarax was always very talented with his ward spells," he says and I can detect the displeasure in his voice as he tries to smile at the other Death Eaters. "It's a shame really. I wanted to use that grand estate for my own pleasure and then I would burn it down for all the world to see. Pride was always the worst of sins with that family."

"We would all help, my lord!" some pinch faced looking woman with a high voice says eagerly from her chair. "The Malfoy's are the worst blood traitors!" she pretends to spit on the ground and the Dark Lord gives her a crooked smile before taking a drink from his glass.

"If I got a hold of that Lucius traitor I would snap his neck!" another one said.

"Make them pay!" screamed another. "Skin them alive!"

I swallow hard and look at my lap as I imagine all of these things coming to pass... but then I feel something warm settle in my chest as they all speak of the terrible things that are to be done to Narcissa, Lucius, and Draco Malfoy when they're finally caught... I think it's because I know they're alive now... they have to be considering all the rage that's being shot around the table right now.

I almost smile.

"Yes, I'm sure you all would do a great many things if given the chance," he says sarcastically putting his attention on another death eater who has one milky white eye. "Donoholv," he says and the man bows in head in respect. Ugh. "Would you say that the goblins at Gringotts are still firmly under your control?" he asks as he puts his chin in his hand like he was having a casual conversation.

"Yes, my Lord," the man named Donoholv says with a sharp nod of his head.

"Hm," Tom nods his head and then looks down at me as he fiddles with the stem on his wine glass. I look away again before he turns back to the Death Eater in question. "If that is true, then I find it very odd that they didn't alert you when Lucius Malfoy went to Gringotts two weeks ago and withdrew _everything_ from all five of the Malfoy family vaults."

"Umm..." Donoholv's face colors immediately and I can see the sweat forming on his brow as he sputters for an explanation.

I don't foresee this ending well for Mr. Donoholv.

"Did the Goblins alert you to that fact?" he asks with a dark brow raised in question and Donoholv struggles with the answer. "It's not a hard inquiry," he snaps. "The Malfoy's have a rather substantial fortune and if they were to pull out all their valuables from the bank, someone would have heard about it."

The man can't seem to find his voice and I look at him from the corner of my eyes as he brings his napkin up to his upper lip to wipe the sweat.

"If what you say is true, and the Goblins are firmly under your control, then I must see that as a form of treason for aiding a traitor to my regime."

Donoholv pales at that and starts sputtering again.

"But if the goblins did _not_ tell you about Malfoy's movements two weeks ago, than I can only deduce that you, in fact, do not have them under your control as you had told me. Making you a liar to your Lord and a lazy follower who I should replace."

The Dark Lord removes a wand from his pocket and puts it on the table. We all watch him as he rolls it back and forth on the table cloth.

"So, which is it, Doloholv? Are you a traitor or are you a liar?"

The choices were not good for the nervous looking Death Eater and even though I knew he probably deserved it... even though I knew he was a terrible person... I felt kind of bad for him. He just looked so... _fucked._

"No answer?" The Dark Lord mocks. "Well, how about some time in the pit? I think that will help," he says and then he waves his hand. The Carrows get up and drag the man from his seat.

He yells and pleads the whole way as they remove him the from the room and I feel my hands shaking under the table as I try not to cry. The pit must be a terrible place to make a middle aged death eater with one terrible looking eye scream and beg like that.

A silence falls over the hall once he's gone and my breathing starts to quicken as I try not to break down and have a panic attack in front of all these... people...

I start scratching my nails over my thighs, hiking up the skirt of my dress so I can get to my skin... making it burn.

"What has you so disgruntled, my darling?" The Dark Lord asks after a lifetime and I look up at him as he swallows more wine from his glass.

I scratch so hard I feel like I might break skin.

"You seem to have such delicate sensibilities," he says with a mocking smile and I ball my hands into fists. I shouldn't scratch... Dr. Carole wouldn't like it.

Tom killed Dr. Carole.

"Did that display upset you?" he asks, making a sweeping motion to the door where the man had been dragged. "My poor girl," he says with a twinkling smile.

I'm sweating... I can feel it on my brow and I resist wiping it off.

"Perhaps it was a bit premature of me to bring you out of your secured little home. "

I look down and wish to blend into the background as he taps his glass with a silver knife.

He pulls something from his pocket and I flick a glance up as he puts the golden compact on the table. I had almost forgotten about that... I had forgotten that he took it. "Do you remember this, my love?" he asks with brows raised.

Is he really going to call me those kinds of names all night?

He turns it in his hands and I watch as Wormtail eyes it curiously.

I don't know who I hate more...

Tom stands up and holds it in his left hand as he starts walking around the table... right towards me.

"Of course you do, my Ginevra," he says in a softer voice and I can feel the chills in the room as he passes by each person, his fingers tapping against the heads of the chairs.

When he gets right beside me, he places the golden compact on my empty plate and he puts some of my hair over my shoulder. The movement sends a chill down my spine and I inhale a shaky breath as the back of his fingers brush against my neck... where the marks of his bite are still healing.

"You are a clever little thing, are you not?" he asks gently as his fingers trail down to my collar bone. "But not as clever as that mudblood Potter runs around with. You see," he says, bending down so his cold breath is against my cheek.

He clicks open the compact and I'm left staring at my terrified reflection.

"She knew right away when we presented Harry Potter with a false you," he says, his lips turning against my temple and I feel my eyes getting wet. "Barely even got a word out before the connection was blocked."

"What do you want from me?" I whisper.

He smiles. "I want you to leave him a message," he says, tapping the table with his fingertips.

He stands up straight and makes a motion to the door.

Three odd looking people start to file into the room like they just happened to stumble upon it. One is a large man with no neck and he's looking around the dining hall full of the worst witches and wizards in the world with his bushy brows raised like he was appraising the room of it's worth. The woman by his side is much taller than him with a thin upper lip and a rather unpleasant looking face.

"Quite gaudy, don't you think, Vernon?" she says with her hand through the arm of a meaty looking boy with blonde hair that looks like straw. He's younger, around my age. "Too dark for my tastes and can you imagine! Purple walls!"

"It is rather dark," the man says. "Look at all the candles, Petunia. What is up with that? Do they not believe in electricity in this part of the country?"

"Probably got the power cut," the woman says with her nose tilted in the air... totally oblivious to the others in the room. "This place smells dirty."

Petunia? Vernon?

I know those names... I look at them again, and then it hits me.

I do _know_ them.

They have to be Harry's aunt and uncle... and... I look at the confused beefy boy again... and his cousin.

The Dursleys.

"Muggles," the Dark Lord smirks against my ear as they look around the dining room, touching tables and commenting on the tapestries on the wall. "Easily fooled by magic. Unable to hold off even the simplest of imperious charms," he adds. He shakes his head as they walk about the room, not knowing they had just stumbled into a snakes den. "Such simple creatures."

"Why are they here?" I ask with a troubled frown as they continue on like they were the only people in the room.

He makes another motion with his hand and the doors open again. This time someone I recognize right off the bat comes into the room and I can feel my chest pull when I see Blaise...

He doesn't look frightened and he's not being dragged in.

In fact, he looks perfectly pleased as he comes in, his face as perfect looking as ever.

"Zabini?" I can't help but say and he smirks at me. "What..."

"I told you that there is always a rat, Ginevra," Tom says as Blaise approaches with a small box in his hands. "And it's always surprising, is it not?"

Suddenly I feel the most overwhelming desire to hurt Blaise Zabini. I know Draco may be alive... but he might be hurt... I don't know who in my family survived the battle at Hogwarts and I blame all of that... everything... on him.

He was the rat.

He was the Wormtail of the group and anger blinds me.

All of his riddles and annoying words...

When he gets close enough to hand off the box to the Dark Lord. I push myself out of my seat. The chair skids across the floor and Blaise doesn't even have a moment to defend himself as I hold onto his shoulders and knee him square in the crotch. I was pulled back before I could inflict more damage and I even think I spit on him as Tom Riddle laughed.

"How very muggle of you," Tom smirked as I was pushed back into my chair by a faceless death eater.

My breath was heavy as Blaise recovered from my attack and his had was still shaking as he put the box on the table.

"I can't believe you," I hiss at him, ignoring the others as I send him waves of negative thoughts.

He refuses to look at me as he pours himself a glass of wine and I take pleasure in seeing his hand shake with the movement. I know that I hurt him and I hope it takes a crew of healers to fix it.

"I knew I hated you for a reason," I tell him and then he finally looks at me, his golden eyes hard and unforgiving.

I hate him.

I hate this place.

I hate everyone.

I didn't want to be here anymore.

It was a split second decision and I aimed for the dining room door as I got up, covering my ears while I ran so I wouldn't hear any demands that would make me come back.

I made it all the way to the front door before I was tackled to the ground and I hissed and fought with my captor before I realized it was Blaise.

"Calm down, Weasley. You know you won't be able to get far," he says as he struggles to keep me still.

"You're a traitor!" I yell at him as I bring a hand up and scratch my fingernails down his perfect looking face.

He hisses in pain as blood starts to bead from the wounds, but he doesn't back up. It just seemed to reinvigorate his efforts and I whimpered when he wrestled me to my back and put his knee on my sternum.

"Traitor to whom, Ginny?" he hisses in my face. "Huh? Traitor? What do I believe in?" he snaps at me, his eyes looking wild and full of emotion. "The Order? Draco? Purebloods? What did I go against?" I twist in his grasp but he holds firm.

"Stop fighting," he snaps at me, his face twisted in anger around the violent red scratches. "You know he's going to make you go back... and trust me... you don't want him to be the one looking for you."

"Let me up," I struggle. "I can't breathe. You're too heavy!"

"Shut up, Weasley," he sighs loudly and then he moves his knee, letting me breathe before laying on top of me, keeping me in place with his weight.

He's too close to me... he's laying on me too intimately and I try to buck him off, but he bends down and presses his lips close to my ear.

"You need to start questioning things," he whispers sharply. "The Dark Lord... Draco... they had the power to make you do anything they wanted... they could make you a soulless creature in Azkaban who had no say or drive in life... they could do that... but they didn't. Do you know why?"

"Get off of me," I snap at him as he presses his leg between mine to hold me in place.

"They didn't, Ginny. Not because they didn't want to. Not because it was better off if you came around on your own. Why didn't they do it? And why hasn't the Dark lord done it himself? You're just a girl, Weasley. Nothing special, right? Just a girl with some strong blood... Why haven't they swiped your mind...Why has the Dark Lord propositioned to train you... why haven't they killed your family?"

I hold still now.

"Because they know what's boiling under the surface. You touched it a little bit at Hogwarts..." he trails off and pulls back to look into my eyes. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to do," he says gently. "Bond... no bond... whatever. They have no real power over you and they know it. They're just hoping that you never find that out."

"I..." I trail off, confused by what he's telling me and then I raise my brows in surprise as he bends down and plants a soft and quick kiss against my lips before pulling back with a pleased little smirk.

"Just thought I'd throw one of those in there," he adds as he loosens his hold on my arm. "Who knows when I'm going to get the chance to ever do that again," he says with a shrug as he helps me to my feet.

"I never know what you're talking about," I admit and he watches me as I wipe off my mouth with the back of my hand.

"Didn't anyone tell you, Ginny?" he asks with a brow raised as I look into his eyes. "I'm a liar," he smirks a devilish little smirk. "And I'm damn good at it too."

What?

He lets that smile drop as he looks me over, his eyes looking much older now than they ever did before. "Wars are not won in a day," he says softly, gently. He reminds me of Abarax at club house five. "They take time and everyone has to do their part. Like chess, remember?" I nod my head as I think of his analogy. "We're just getting into position."

"I don't want to play anymore," I whisper and he gives me a sad look. I don't want to receive looks like that from him of all people.

"That's not your call, I'm afraid."

A second later, I hear the slithering of a large snake and I look down the hall to see Nagini headed towards us.

I glare at her and Zabini takes my arm roughly.

"Aren't you glad I volunteered to grab you?" he says, pulling me down the hall with the snake close behind like a guard. "You know she would have bitten you."

When we get back to the dining room, Tom was speaking to the others at the table over a map and Blaise practically threw me into my seat. It hurt and I whimpered as I tried not to show how painful it was.

"Take a seat, Mr. Zabini," Tom said, making a sweeping motion to the unoccupied seat by my own. "Before she decides to make it so you never have children in the future."

They all laugh like puppets and I glare at Zabini with everything I have. I hate his riddles. I hate his lies... he does lie, right? Isn't that one of his things? How am I supposed to know what's real?

"Enough of that," Tom taps my shoulder so I reluctantly tear my glaze away from Blaise to focus on him as he clicks open the box. "Be cordial to my guests."

Inside of the box is a dagger, and when I see it I send a panicked look to the Dursleys, who are still mulling about the room like it was afternoon tea. I've seen a dagger like that some where before... but I just can't place it right now.

"I am tired of playing this tug of war game with Harry Potter," he says with a sigh. "It must end now. I have more important things to do than worry about a young boy ruining all of my very thought out plans," he says as he removes the dagger from the box and he holds it up to the light. "I want to bring him out of hiding again... and I need you to do that for me."

"Why are they here, then?" I ask with a dry throat as I nod to the Dursleys. "Harry doesn't even like them... they were so terrible to him. They hate magic."

"Yes," Tom nods his head, mocking sympathy. "But you see, the thing about you little Dumbledore lovers is that you will do anything for anyone if you think it's your fault they're in pain."

He hands the dagger off to Alecto Carrow. "Kill the young one," he says and I go to stand up as she takes off towards Dudley Dursley, who's staring at one of the moving paintings with a quirked head. "Make it bloody."

Tom puts his hand on my shoulder, keeping me in place with his iron grip and a silent demand that my body listens to with out my consent.

"This is an odd telly, don't you think..." As soon as the youngest Dursley turned to speak to his parents, Alecto Carrow came up behind him and slashed his throat with one sweeping motion of her hand.

The vomit got stuck in my throat as blood started to spill from the gash like a waterfall. He gargled and fell to his knees as he tried to reach for something... anything to help. Right before he died... he noticed all of us and he was looking right at me as he slumped against the hard marble floor... dark blood pooling around his body and spreading.

I will never get used to seeing such horrors and I felt tears blurring my eyes as the Dark Lord petted my neck.

"Do you suppose this is real silver?" his mother asks, walking right past her dead son. Petunia Dursley steps in the blood and her shoes leave bloody foot prints as she walks towards one of the candle stick holders.

"Good," the Dark Lord claps his hand before turning to me. "Now, press that button and leave Mr. Potter a message for me, will you, my love?" He blinks at me, red eyes almost black with magic. "Let him know that I am tired of playing this game... let him know that it is time for him to die."

"I don't... What am I suppose to say?" I ask with a shaking voice and he reaches down and clicks the button on the side of compact.

It doesn't ring, of course, it goes straight to recording a message.

Tom stands behind me and puts his hands on my shoulder as I stare at the reflection, knowing that it's saving it like a memory so the person on the other side of the mirror can watch.

"Tell him what just happened," he says as he bends down to whisper against my ear. "Or I'll kill someone else to encourage you."

I look at my reflection.

"Harry," I start out awkwardly. "Your... they just... your cousin just was killed," my voice sounds odd to my ears... like it was almost too high for it to sound normal.

"Tell him that I will kill his aunt and uncle as well," he whispers, just soft enough for me to hear as he runs his hand over my neck and collar bone.

It made me sick thinking someone else would be able to see him touching me so intimately. When his fingers started dance along the top of my dress, I felt my face pale and when the hand went further down, dancing over my breasts before resting on my stomach, I feel tears sting my eyes. What would Harry think? Would my parents see this? Would Draco.?

I felt the cry get stuck in my throat again and I had to cough before I could continue.

"They have your aunt and uncle too... they might kill them."

He makes a motion with his hand and then I hear screaming. I ignore the compact and my head snaps to Petunia Dursley as the Dark Lord finally removes his hand from my stomach. One of the Death Eaters woke her up from the curse and she noticed her dead son... She dropped to her knees by his side, her pale pink skirt becoming saturated from the blood she's kneeling in.

I put my hand on my heart at the sight and I blink back more tears.

The Dark Lord hums a little song to himself as he turns the compact so it will record the image as Petunia Dursley screams so loud that it makes the room vibrate. The pain in her voice is real... so real that it's heart breaking and even though I knew she had been terrible to Harry his whole life... I still felt horrible for her. For having to see her son like that... for realizing as she looked up that she was in a room with the things she despised most in her life.

I wonder if she feels justified in her hatred of wizards and witches and all things magic now? She looks at us like a scared animal backing up in a corner and I can't say that I could blame her if she thought that.

"Hello," Tom says pleasantly when she notices him finally, standing by me at the head of the table.

He picks up the compact and turns it towards her again to catch the expression of pure terror on her face.

"I'm not a boy," The Dark Lord says and I figure he must have pulled a thought from her mind. He tisks his tongue and looks at the table of followers. "Stupid muggle," he says. "She thinks I'm just a teenage boy like her nephew."

They all laugh again and then he turns back to the frightened looking woman. I can't say I blame her for thinking that. Tom does look young now... like a young man just out of university and his mocking remarks and smirk do little to deter from it.

"I can assure you I am no boy," he says, taking a step closer to her. "I am Lord Voldemort," he says proudly. "And you, pathetic woman," he adds insult to injury as he eyes her tears in distaste. "Have had the mass misfortune of being related to Harry Potter."

"I knew that boy was no good," she says as she crawls backwards until she's by one of the pillars that holds up the fireplace mantle. She puts her arm around it like it would protect her from the darkest wizard in history. "We didn't want him from the start! No good wizard like his father..."

"Do you hate wizards?" he asks curiously, like he was concerned by her opinion.

"Magic is the work of the devil," she says in a hysterical voice as she hugs the pillar like her life depended on it. "Demons the lot of you!" she screams as she points a shaking finger to the table of the worst witches and wizards a muggle could point an accusing finger at.

"Well," the dark lord smiles with the compact still in hand. "In that case..."

He makes another motion with his hand.

Harry's uncle was still talking about the tapestries on the wall and he had walked closer to me to admire the meal set on the table. He had ended up right between me and Blasie and he was eating a chicken leg, oblivious to anything happening in the real word.

He was talking to his dead son about how the chicken was good despite the surroundings as the Death Eater named Yaxley stood up and removed his wand. Tom circled the table for a better view to record what was about to happen.

He lifted his wand to Harry's uncle and shouted a spell.

I don't know the spell he used, but the impact was instantaneous. Gashes opened on Vernon Dursley's face and neck and I could see it saturate his white staunch shirt as he kept talking about the chicken, still under the imperious curse. Too far gone to realize he was going to bleed to death. Yaxley did another curse that took a chunk out of his neck, and the attack made blood from the muggle spray over my face.

I was too shocked to move and I just sat there with Harry's uncle's blood splattered on my face as he started to bleed out. Petunia Dursley was screaming so loud that I couldn't even hear him drop to the floor.

I was frozen in my spot with my hands halfway to my face as I stared ahead of me, trying to dissociate myself from the horrors that were happening in front of me. Tom was talking to the compact now... I don't know what he was saying and I don't really care... I just couldn't... I might throw up. I turn to the side and dry heave a few times, but nothing comes so I sit straight and stare down at my lap with my eyes clenched shut, trying to pretend like I'm some where else.

Somewhere safe. Somewhere warm. The Burrow... Draco's bed... anywhere but here.

I start thinking of songs from the record player at Riddle Manor... living in a beautiful land like in the _Sound of Music_. My favorite of Mary Wrigley's records. I can hear the songs floating in my head as I place myself away from where I am in reality.

I would be perfectly content to live in a dream.

Someone said my name, so I opened my eyes, pulled back to the real world of darkness and blood.

Then the Dark Lord was back by my side, turning the compact towards me to show my shocked and blood splattered face.

"Say goodbye, Ginevra," he says and I glance at the compact, at my reflection.

My face was stark white... even my lips are pale with fright and it makes the blood on my face stand out alarmingly. My eyes look glassed over and if I wasn't breathing so loudly I would say I looked like a dead person... a corpse walking around like a zombie.

"You look ravishing, my love," he jokes again with a cruel smirk. "I've always liked you in red."

I don't respond, I just keep staring at my dead eyed expression in the mirror. I want to be saved now. I want Harry, the Order, Draco... I want them all to come and rescue me. Please. Just save me.

He snaps the compact shut after that and then a few of his followers lift their wands to get rid of the bloody mess and bodies.

"Take her away as well," he says, motioning to the frantic and hysterical woman sobbing on the floor.

He reaches in front of me to grab my glass of wine, downing it all in one gulp.

"You won't be able to kill Harry," I say flatly, bravely, as I feel the hatred for him boil inside of my heart.

He glances at me as he swallows.

"You can't beat him. No matter what you do. He's proven himself against you time and time again and I think deep down you know that he will kill you in the end. Harry will win this war... not you.. Never you..."

Blaise kicks me under the table... I guess to get me to shut up, but I ignore it... I ignore him all together.

"Harry is going to kill you."

He laughed, a short bark of a laugh. "Just like your Mr. Malfoy was going to beat me?" he asks and I feel the pang in my chest at the mention of Draco. He laughs again as he pulls a handkerchief from his pocket and he throws it on my plate. "Clean yourself," he says with amusement clear in his voice. "You look like hell, Ginny bean."

That did it.

That was the name only my father called me and I knew that the Dark Lord had pulled it from my memories to play with me... to torment me... to embarrass me.

"I hope you die soon," I say with bitterness lacing my every word.

"I can't die," he says, talking to me like I was a child and he touches my face quickly with his finger tips before pulling back. "Have you forgotten that already? The world is such a big scary place for such a frightened little girl, isn't it?" he asked tauntingly. "Things must get so confusing for you."

"I hate you," I hiss at him and then I couldn't stop... the words just kept coming.

I didn't even know what I was saying... I just kept talking about how Harry was going to beat him and how he was weak in comparison. How a boy with with half his experience has gotten the best of him yet again and will continue to do so because...

I started thinking about the house I was staying in and the boxes in the attic... the boy in the diary. Tom Riddle.. Riddle Manor... Tom Marvolo Riddle... _I will not follow a half blood, Gin_... Draco had said that... he had meant it.

"You will never beat Harry," I tell him as I aim for the jugular. "Because your father was a muggle and you're even more of a half blood than Harry is." I can feel the hush fall over the room as the Dark Lord's eyes narrowed into slits. "You're nothing but a dirty half blood."

I intended the admission to stun... and by God it did.

As soon as that slipped from my mouth I knew I was going to regret it because a silent chill had fallen across the room. Voldemort had a very dark expression on his face as soon as I stopped talking and I thought he was going to hex me, but instead he gently gripped my chin and tilted it towards him.

The calm fury in his eyes was almost too frightening and I wanted to pull away, but I knew I had crossed the line and there was no going back.

"Why do you say such hurtful things?" he asks softly as he runs his knuckles over my cheek with feather light touches, smearing the blood that was starting to dry there. "Didn't your mother ever tell you that if you can't say anything nice, then you shouldn't say anything at all?"

Him mentioning my mother infuriates me... I have no idea what condition she's in.. if she's still alive. I hate him for doing this to us... to me... to the people that I love and when he gives me a cruel and mocking smirk, I can't help it. I don't actually know what came over me, but I narrow my eyes and then I spit right at him.

I was aiming for his face, but it landed somewhere on the lapel of his jacket.

The silence was deafening.

Tom let go of my chin and then he looked at the spit, sliding down the fine material of his jacket. He looked murderous for a moment and then he laughed, a light and humorless laugh as he took the green kerchief from my plate to dab his lapel.

"Oh, how you make me laugh," he says and then the others laughed uncomfortably because they think they should.

I don't. I just stare daggers at him and once my spit is cleaned from his jacket, he puts his hand back on my face. He starts to caress me gently, his finger tips gentle and searching as they run up my neck and over my cheek. He stares into my eyes for what felt like a lifetime before smiling.

"You are such a pretty little thing," he says before bringing his hand back and swiftly smacking me across the face.

It was a surprise attack and it sounded like the crack of a whip, echoing off the walls.

The impact sends my face flying to the side and I bring my hand up to cover the burned cheek as everyone in the room holds their breath. I have never been struck before... not like that... not deliberately in the face by a grown man... I felt like crying, but no tears came out and I glanced at Blaise because...

I don't know why I looked at him... I guess just because he was the only person I knew in this room of snakes...but be wasn't looking at me... he was looking at his empty plate and I hated myself for being embarrassed.

"Why do you do things that make me want to hurt you?" Tom asks thoughtfully as I gather up the courage and the pride to glare at him again, still cupping my throbbing cheek. "You brought that on yourself."

There were chimes of agreement by his followers and I felt a stray tear leak from the corner of my eye with out my permission. I saw him take pleasure in the tear, following it's progression as it dripped down my face... He looked triumphant when another tear fell, thinking he had won the battle of wills and I looked down at my lap... out of shame and anger.. as I plotted my revenge.

Most of it involved sending a large spike right through the bastard's heart.

I can't believe he smacked me... I close my eyes to regroup and inhale a shaking breath.

Tom grabs the back of my neck and I flinch when he squeezes, thinking he's going to hurt me again... like smack my face into the table to break my nose.

"Go to sleep," he says flatly and because of the bond, I feel the itch in my chest and then I close my eyes and slump against the table.

I don't dream about anything or any one. Just blackness... empty cold darkness all around me.

* * *

I wake in a soft bed with a man with thick glasses hovering around me. I blink a few times, knowing that my waking hours can be manipulated and when I find the strength, I fumble around until I push myself up in the sitting position.

I'm in the green room at the Riddle house again and a rather pudgy man with sausage fingers is poking around my stomach.

"Stop," I say as I smack his hands away. My voice sounds muffled, like I swallowed a bunch of cotton.

"Let him do his job."

I close my eyes when I hear that voice. I must be stuck in a nightmare and when I see the fat man move to the side to grab something from a leather bag, I notice Tom sitting at one of the wing back chairs by the window. He's reading the newspaper with the fingers of his left hand pressed against his temple.

"Don't give him any trouble." he adds flatly and I let my hands fall weakly to my sides as the man comes back with his wand to run over my midsection. "I have no problems using more persuasive means of getting you to obey. As you know."

I lay back against the pillows and clench my eyes shut as I wait for the strange man to finish whatever the hell he's doing. I don't care. I give up caring. When the wand work is done, the man nudges me and when I open my eyes, he's holding a vial of a glowing green potion in front of me face.

He doesn't say anything, but I know what he wants me to do.

I shake my head. "What is it?" I mumble out and he pushes it at me again, forcing me to hold it. "I won't drink something I don't know."

"You may go now, Talbot," Tom says as he folds the paper over the arm rest. The man named Talbot gathers up all of his things in that black leather bag and then scurries out of the room.

Leaving me alone with the devil.

I stare at my lap as his polished shoes carry him across the floor boards until they reach me. He sits beside me on the bed, the mattress sinking with the weight, and he takes the potion from my hand. He uncorks the vial and then he holds it under my nose.

"You will drink this because I am telling you to," he says flatly. "You will do as I say because I am Lord Voldemort and anything I say goes," he licks his lips and I feel my stomach turn. "You will start listening to me unquestionably. I am not your enemy," he says and I nearly laugh at the tenderness in his voice as my bruised cheek screams in protest.. "And you definitely do not want me to think of you a such," he says darkly. "Now do you?"

I shake my head.

"Good," he smiles pleasantly. "Drink." I hesitate. "Now."

I bring it to my lips and tilt it back. It tastes like citrus and mint and when I swallow it all, I feel his icy hand on my wrist, pulling the vial way.

"Good girl," he says and he reminds me of Draco.

The main difference being that I love Draco... I do not love the Dark Lord. I_ hate_ everything about him. I know he heard that because he smiled again and brought a hand up to my face. I flinched because it hurt and the smack resurfaces in my memory. I still can't believe he hit me like that... but he is the dark lord... I shouldn't be surprised.

"I have a gift for you," he says as he reaches into the front pocket of his waist coat.

I watch nervously as he starts pulling out a long golden chain and dangling from the bottom is a oval yellow stone.

"You will wear this," he says as he puts it over my head until it's resting against my neck. The yellow stone lays against my chest and Tom picks it up and runs it through his long fingers. "A gift from my family to yours," he says with a little smile on his face.

It makes me think of the bracelet that Draco gave me and I start fiddling with the dragons on my wrist. Accepting something from him would cement our bond even more... but I don't have a choice. Why even fight it? He lets the the stone rest against my chest again and then he studies my face with his eyes slightly narrowed.

"You still have blood all over your face," he says as he lifts his wand. He flicks his wrist and I can feel a cleansing spell clean my skin from all the blood, sweat, and tears.

He touches my cheek again.

He doesn't say anything, but I can feel his magic as it runs through his finer tips and heals the bruise forming there. Then his hand starts to drift down my neck and then to the strap of the ridiculous dress I'm wearing.

I go to stop his hand, but it's a weak attempt and his evil eyes snap to mine.

Why?

That was my one thought and he started to lower the strap as he pondered my question that I know he heard.

"Because," he says flatly as he watches as more skin is exposed to him. "I told you there were great magical benefits to our union. If your blood can make me whole again, imagine what the blood of a child with both of our magical capabilities would do."

All that I can imagine is a baby with tubes running in and out of it's arm to collect blood. The Dark Lord sees the image and laughs as he goes to pull down the other strap.

"I would hardly keep them alive," he says and I furrow my brows.

"What do you mean?" I ask with a hoarse voice and he smiles again, a cruel look hardening in his eyes.

"The greatest evils produce the most powerful magic," he says as he leans in and inhales against my neck like I was a steak he was going to devour. "That's why no one would ever be as powerful as me. Because they are cowards and there are lines that cowards won't cross. I will be a God," he says softly, like it was a day dream. "I will be_ invincible_. Isn't that something your Gryffindor mentality can respect?"

It takes me a few seconds to realize what that would mean and then I feel the revolting feeling squeezing my stomach.

"You..." I trail off as he runs his nose against my cheek, his hands disappearing to my back to work on the zipper. "You would kill them?"

The thought is too great of an evil to even understand and I just couldn't get my mind to wrap around it. For a person to have a child just to kill them for their own benefit... for their own magic... how could one person be that evil?

"You're still young," he says as he slowly unzips the back of my dress, one of his cold hands disappearing under the fabric to run across my skin.

It causes my skin to prickle with goosebumps.

"Your body has plenty of time to reproduce. I might let you keep one or two," he says and I feel like my throat is so tight that no air can escape. "If you're good," he smirks against my ear.

He pulls down the top of my dress, exposing one of the lacy bras that Ruth made me buy and I feel a very embarrassed blush staining my cheeks. I watch as he looks down at it, licking his lips in a very human fashion as that golden necklace he gave me falls between my breasts. God or not... he was still a man under it all and I was regretting that fact right about now.

"I..." I trail off as I think of what Blaise said as he held me down in the front hall of that house. I don't have to do anything I don't want to do and I know where this might be leading. Tom runs his hands up my back to take off my bra and I grip his upper arms, digging my nails into his flesh. "I don't want to."

"Don't want to what?" he asks casually, like he knew I wouldn't want to say it.

"Get away from me."

He smiles in amusement, like I was a puppy doing something adorable.

"Get away," I say again trying to focus my magic like I did when I closed the curtain.

He laughs, no doubt feeling the tingle of magic I was trying to use and then his face turns serious as he grabs my arms and throws me down on the bed.

"You can't use that against me, little one," he mocks as he wraps his hands around my arms so tightly that it starts to hurt. "I think you forget who I am."

"Get away," I say flatly trying again to focus my magic.

"Make me," he says in challenge as he rips the covers away from me. He releases one of my hands and I take that opportunity to punch him directly in the jaw.

It feels like hitting pure marble and I whimper like a weak thing once I pull back.

The pain ripples my hand and I hold back a cry as he glares down at me, red blossoming on his skin.

"I guess you owed me one, yes?" he says with his jaw clenched in anger as I bring my hurt hand up to my lips like it would deaden the pain. I feel like I broke a finger. "How about you act more like a witch and less like a muggle. Make me stop with magic, Ginevra, and I will never try to touch you again. I can swear to you that."

I try to push him off again, but he pins me to the bed, his eyes almost black again as he tilts his face to the side.

"With magic," he repeats. "Use magic to stop me and I will let you walk away from this house. No strings attached."

He starts to tear the dress from the rest of my body and I kick at him with all my might. It's no use... he's physically stronger than me anyways and I was totally naked and full of fresh bruises within two seconds of fighting. He was unbuckling his belt by the time we fell off the bed and onto the ground. I was trying to focus my magic... but I couldn't do it... my mind was too frazzled... I was too scared...

I'm too weak.

"You can't win," he says before biting down on my ear in a mock imitation of Draco's soft kisses there. "No one can beat me."

He's holding me down again as he unzips his pants and I look away... to the left...under the bed... his wand... I feel hope in my chest and I even dare the corner of my lip to turn up in a smile. It must have fallen from his pocket when we fell from the bed.

That I could do.

He frees himself and I can feel him pushing into me. It hurts. I'm not turned on at all and completely unprepared for the intrusion. I've never really felt this kind of pain before but it spurs me into action. I reach for the wand and I can feel my magic move through me. The wand is just out of my reach, but my magic pulls it to my hand. I have it against his neck before he's able to press the rest of his body into mine and he freezes.

Then he laughs, pulling back to look down at me.

"What are you going to do?" he asks as he looks into my eyes. He pushes into me a little bit more and I wince at the pain. "Kill me? You know you can't do that," he says sharply as he pulls back and then he slams into me so hard I nearly drop the wand. "Don't you remember?"

A memory surfaces in my mind. Of being eleven in the room of requirement. The Dark Lord using my hand to kill a squib and him pulling a piece of my being from my chest to place with his in that beautiful head piece... The lost diadem of Ravenclaw he had called it.

"We're bonded in more ways than one now."

He starts showing me things... He shows me memories of his life... how he killed so he could live forever... how he hid away his soul in objects so he could rule the world... how he made me do the same.

Suddenly I knew everything... what Harry was doing when he traveled with my brother and Hermione... killing the objects to kill the dark lord... but they didn't get to he crown because it was hidden... because it was with Wormtail..

_If they want to kill me, they will surely kill you_... his voice echoes in my head and I clench my jaw.

If they want to kill him... they'd have to kill... I shake my head. No. It's too horrid to think about..

He's right, I can't kill him. Not now anyways, but I can't have him this close to me anymore. I can't have him almost inside of me.

The only spell that comes to mind is one that will get him far away from me. I shout it and the spell blows him across the room, making him hit the small fireplace, shattering most of the decorations on top.

I stand up and grab the cover, wrapping it around me quickly as I run from the room. I can hear him hissing behind me and then I hear Nagini.

Fuck.

She's faster than I am but I sprint towards the stairs and jump down three at a time. I nearly trip over the blanket, but I keep going until I use his wand to blast open the front door. The wood splinters and the magic holding me in breaks as I run over the threshold. I keep running even though I can hear him calling. I keep running even though I know deep down I won't get far.

I need someone to save me... I'm no good at saving myself. That much is obvious.

Why hasn't anyone come yet?

I keep lifting the wand to Apparate, but the magic fizzles off. I'm not at a safe app zone yet and I curse under my breath when I look over my shoulder and see Nagini right behind me...

I catch my foot on a rock and fall on my knees. It sends a shock of pain right through my system and I know I've lost when Nagini curls herself in front of me and gets up so her head is waving in front of my face, hissing and spitting at me.

I bet she's cussing at me in snake speak.

"That was a nice try," Tom is right behind me as I clutch his wand to my chest while holding the cover in place with my left hand. He starts petting my hair as he sighs loudly. "But, I must say-"

The sentence gets caught in his throat as I make a swishing motion with his wand. The spell slices off the head of that fucking snake and there's a deafening pause as Nagini's head slides from her body.

A white mist escapes her neck and her body slumps to the ground as her head rolls to the side, her face still open in a hissing expression.

Tom grips my hair tightly then and yanks my head back. The pain from it makes me drop the wand and it clatters to the ground.

"You fucking bitch," he snarls and I feel a little smile on my face when I see his anger... there's none of that mocking tone in his voice... there's no playfulness... just a deadly rage that lightens my heart.

I had just done something that was unexpected and it had pissed him off.

I kind of felt like I won this battle.

He throws me to the ground and tugs the cover from my body. I don't even resist that much as he crawls on top of me and holds me down, forcing himself into me for the second time in one day. He's merciless in his movements and it's one of the most painful experiences of my life... but I don't even care.

I'm laughing... and crying at the same time... but every time I look to the right and see Nagini's dead body I can't help but feel pleased.

This time it was definitely rape and he was doing all that he could to make it hurt.

And it did hurt... it hurt more than I could imagine and I knew that once this was over and I was by myself that my heart was going to break into a million pieces, but I couldn't think of that right now... I just had to focus on Nagini's dead body to bring me some peace.

It was surprisingly easy.

I was laughing when he pulled on the chain of the necklace he gave me and he twisted it in his hands until it was nearly choking me to death. It didn't stop me from being pleased, but it did hurt like hell.

When he was finished, he didn't say one word to me. No cutting remark or quip. He just transported me back into the bedroom and then put up the wards again as I laid on the bed and stared up the ceiling, laughing like a maniac.

When he's gone, my laughs turn into sobs and then I stand up on wobbly legs to make my way to the bathroom. I turn on the shower and don't even dare look at myself in the mirror before climbing in.

The water's hot and it burns every bruise and cut on my body. When I wash between my legs, I pull back to find blood there. The shower washes it away, making the water by my feet almost pink and I feel my eyes start to burn

It all hits me like a ton of bricks and I slide down the wall. Once sitting at the base of the tub, I pull my knees to my chest and wrap my arms around my legs. I start to cry like a child. The water beats down on me until it turns ice cold, but I don't move...

I stay for hours.

The pain was worth it, I think, just to see that surprised rage on his face.

I doubt much surprises the Dark Lord.

I smile a little to myself before I put my forehead on my knees, pretending like I'm somewhere else.

I imagine I'm a child again going to Yellow Springs with my family and riding the Ferris wheel with my father.

I imagine I'm happy and smiling and laughing.

After this year... I don't know if I'll ever be able to laugh again.

Another sob gets stuck in my throat and then I remember how Nagini's head thumped to the ground.

That sob turns into a laugh.

I think I might be losing my mind.

* * *

Days over lap and time stops ticking as weeks pass by with out incident. No one comes to see me... not that I really care, but I do find myself reading some of those ridiculous books in the drawing room. I agree with none of it and it makes my heart burn. How could anyone believe that crap?

The necklace he had given me refuses to come off. Every time I try to pull it over my head, the chain gets smaller until it almost chokes me...I have a constant red ring around my neck because of the violence I seem to inflict on myself. Like I was hanged until the point of death only to be revived again. It's no use. I know deep down it's not coming off. I stopped caring about that too.

I take my meals each day in the dining room and each morning with my breakfast there's a small vial of that green potion that Talbot gave me before the Dark Lord...before he...before he did that evil thing that he did to me after I killed Nagini.

It hurts too much to thinking about, so I try not to.

I try to ignore it even though the soreness and bruises that followed the violent act made it hard to pass over. I try... even though sometimes in the middle of the night, I wake in a cold sweat, feeling the weight of his body on top of mine, screaming as he holds me down.

I try to ignore it so much that I refuse to even write it down in my detailed accounts in the notebook.

It never happened.

It was a time that doesn't exist anymore...even though sometimes I can still feel him inside of me... pushing... hurting... laughing...

It's too much for me to bear.

I spend most of my time stuck in a day dream. I fantasize about living a life with Draco... the life that he wanted... where I could spend my days writing and raising our two maybe three children while he does something amazing in politics.

Something that changes the world for the better because being stuck here... away from him and everything that he was makes my mind view him more and more favorably with each passing moment.

I miss him so much that it hurts. I want to see him again, just one more time.

Sometimes I live in memories of my childhood when things were normal... when I was normal... when life made sense. I live in my thoughts about Charlie and Tonks and Remus and everyone else that I had loved who was taken from me violently.

Sometimes I don't think at all... I just stare out of the windows in the drawing room... hearing nothing... seeing nothing... becoming nothing...

I feel like I'm turning into a piece of furniture in this well furnished house. Just Ginny... in Riddle Manor... left to rot like a lamp or a table.

Just Ginny.

In fact, it was when I was staring out the window one afternoon when I heard a very distinct jingling coming from the kitchen.

I stand up with the book in my hands to investigate the noise and when a cat comes running towards me my mouth opens in shock.

"Henry?" I whisper in surprise as the fat cat hops in my arms. "What are you doing here?" I ask with a brow raised as I scratch his head.

Of course he doesn't answer and I hold him close to my chest.

I look around me, to find some clue as to where he came from... I check the kitchen and the upstairs... every nook and cranny... but nothing turns up any answer for me.

I shrug it off. I guess I don't care about that either.

I bring him with me to the drawing room to finish up my afternoon routine and when night comes he snuggles down with me on the bed. I pull him to me and nuzzle his fur as he paws at the covers. I cry some more as he curls into my arms. I'm so glad to have another thing to talk to, it's almost pathetic, really.

More days pass... night turns to day turns to night turns to day... a continues stream of nothingness.

I start feeling more alive with my favorite companion, though. He gives me a purpose and a reason to get out of bed.

He makes me feel like I'm not a doll, living forever in a play house owned by a demented child. I owe him my life for it, honestly. Good Henry. I feed him bits from my plate in the dining hall and I speak to him in soft whispers about how I fantasize about decapitating the Dark Lord with an ax.

All that sunny teenage girl stuff.

I bring him to the room with the record player and I hold him against me as we dance to the music. I like to imagine that the fat old thing likes it, but deep down I know he hates it. I don't care too much and sometimes I sing to him as he plays with a tassel on a pillow... _Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens... _I laugh at his bitter looking face as he tries to wiggle away from me..._Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens..._

I dangle my necklace in front of him and he hops to it, landing on my lap as his claw-less paws bat at the yellow gem... _Brown paper packages tied up with strings__ ..._He's the only cat I've know to be de-clawed like that and it makes me think of the Zabini's... of course they would domesticate their pets like that..._ These are a few of my favorite things.._.

I stop singing as I scratch behind his ear.

Thinking of the Zabini's makes me think of Blaise and thinking of Blaise makes me think of how fond he was of Henry. Thinking of that makes me think of his albino house elf Franklin and thinking of Franklin makes me think of the female albino elf that harassed me my first day here.

Is she related to Franklin? Did she bring Henry to me?

I want to ask her. Maybe she'll bring me other things... maybe she'll help me leave this place.

I call for her all the time, but she never shows and finally I figure out how to get her attention.

I stop eating.

On the third day of my fast, weak with hunger, she pops into the dining room, a face of fury. "The miss must eat!" she screeches as Henry hides underneath my chair. "The master wants the miss to eat so the miss will eat!"

"Are you related to Franklin from the Zabini house?" I ask, licking my dry lips. I haven't brushed my hair in days and my lips feel cracked and dry from chewing on them so fiercely.

I must look a right mess to this little elf and she's doing a terrible job of hiding her disgust with me.

She looks upset for half a second before snapping her fingers. The chair traps me again, and I know what it means so I pick up a fork.

"Are you a house elf owned by the Zabinis?" I ask because albino elves are hard to come by and... it would explain Henry.

"The miss will eat," she repeats as I put some noodles on the fork.

"Faun," I say, looking into her purple eyes as I bring the fork closer to my lips. "I order you to tell me," I say flatly knowing no elf could resist an order like that. "Tell me what I want to know."

She struggles for a moment before shaking head. "Frankie belongs to Master Zabini, so does Faun," she says as Henry runs across my legs, weaving his body between them.

"Does Franklin ever come into this house?" I ask.

"Frankie does the cooking for the Miss!" she calls, her hands clenched in fists at her admission. "Frankie does not like the new master. Frankie wants Miss Georgina back! Frankie gave miss the cat even though it is forbidden!"

"Why is it forbidden to give me a cat?"

She doesn't say anything.

"Can I talk to Franklin?" I ask and she snaps her fingers, making the bonds on the chair tighten to a painful degree.

Right.

I don't press the matter. I don't want him taken away and I've learned what I wanted to know. I know why I had gotten Henry.

It was because of Blaise and I almost felt bad for kneeing him in the crotch.

Almost.

I take a bite of food and the bonds loosen as Faun watches me with narrowed eyes. She's getting added to the list of things I want to kill.

Right up there with Tom Marvolo Riddle.

I lick my lips before taking another bite... my throat is dry and it feels like I'm eating sandpaper, so I take a quick drink from my water glass before looking at her.

"I would like to talk to the Dark Lord," I whisper. I don't know where it came from but I just can't... I can't just keep doing nothing. "Can you tell him? Can you tell him I want to see him?"

She eyes me for a few moments before popping away.

After I eat the rest of the meal, the chair finally releases me and I pick up Henry.

"Now we're getting somewhere," I whisper to his fur.

I run upstairs to make myself presentable and then I run back down with my heart beating a mile a minute...

I wait in the drawing room, staring at the buffet along the far wall as I try to come up with something to say if he comes. Should I tell him that I want to follow him? Should I swear my allegiance just so he'll let me out of this freaking house?

There's a tumbler full of amber liquid with four glasses set around it on the buffet. I gave it a curious look before walking towards it and pulling the cork from the top.

I sniff it.

It's some kind of alcohol. I'm nervous, so I pour myself a glass with shaking fingers and hold it up to my lips.

Liquid courage, right?

I take a tentative sip. It burns my throat but I know what it is right away because I had it before over the summer at one of the parties Draco took me to. It's firewhiskey. I have no idea why it's in this house with me, but I don't mind as I take another sip.

After finishing the glass I start thinking of why it would be here. Not for my benefit surely... I start thinking of the only person who would come here... the Dark Lord. I have never seen him eat, but on several occasions I had seen the Dark Lord drink.

At the Zabini house he was drinking some kind of alcohol from a very similar looking tumbler and at the Malfoy's Halloween dinner he was drinking wine... even at that terrible dinner where the Dursley's were murdered he was drinking.

He likes alcohol.

If he came, I bet he would drink this.

I put my glass down as I stare at the amber liquid inside. I know instantly what I should do. I bound up the stairs and dig through the chest of drawers until I find the bag of potions Ruth Davenport had given me. I shift through the until I find the poison and I lick my lips before running back down stairs.

I look over my shoulder quickly before uncorking it and pouring it all into the tumbler. I put the stopper back on and shake the alcohol around to mix it up before throwing the potion bottle into the fire to hide the evidence.

I sit down on one of the chairs and start biting my finger nails until they're so short that it almost hurts.

I fell asleep in the chair after waiting well into the night.

He doesn't come for three weeks.

* * *

I'm in the drawing room again, wearing one of those ridiculous dresses my mother had made me when he comes into the room wearing a black fur lined cloak that has snow clinging to it's fabric. Henry's on my lap and he tenses his furry body as the Dark Lord approaches with quick and dominant steps.

"You wanted to see me?" he asks flatly and I'm actually kind of surprised that he came considering... considering what happened last time and how long it took for him to get here.

"Yes," I stand up and the cat drops to the floor.

He eyes him for a moment before looking back at me.

"How did that come into your possession?" he asks, nodding to the cat who's hissing at him from under the chair. I don't answer and he nods. "It seems as though there is a house-elf I must punish, yes?"

"No, don't," I shake my head and then inhale sharply as I find a lie. "I found him in the basement. He must have crawled in through a hole."

"I doubt that," he says flatly, clearly not believing me. "What did you want?" he asks, changing the subject.

"I wanted to speak to you."

"Well, by all means, speak," he says as he walks towards the tumbler of firewhiskey. I hold my breath as he takes off the top to pour himself a glass. "I'm on a schedule."

He walks over to the fireplace so he's standing in front of me, demanding my attention in a way only he can. I sit down just because his presence is so imposing.

"I wanted... I wanted..." I trail off, trying to find the words as he holds the glass to his lips. He pauses for a moment and I look away so he doesn't see what I have done. "I wanted you to show me magic," I mumble as he puts the glass down on the mantle.

I look at it as he takes off his cloak and eyes me suspiciously. I hate this man with a passion and I start knotting the skirt of my dress as I try to stamp down my emotions. I hate everything he's done and everything he is, but I try to keep it down as I inhale deeply through my nostrils.

"After the stunt you pulled?" he questions as he throws the cloak on a near by chair. "I think not."

"I've been thinking..." I pause again as he looks to me with his brows raised.

He was wearing a more casual outfit today. When I saw him before, he was always wearing a well fitted suit, but today he wore a pair of darker khaki slacks and a black pullover sweater. I must have caught him on a day off from taking over the world and for some reason that thought amused me.

But only for half a second.

"Thinking is always a dangerous business," he comments as he studies me. "I never recommend it."

I ignore his joke as I bunch up my skirt again.

"I've been thinking about you... and magic..." I say. "And how powerful you are. You're right... Harry... no one will ever beat you. Your power is too great," I lie as I flick another small glance to his poisoned drink. "You're too... powerful..." that's all I could come up with. I figure stroking his ego could never hurt. "I've been wrong to resist," I lie again and he narrows his eyes, catching it easily. "I've been stupid. I don't want to be stupid anymore... or weak... I want to be great like you."

"So you can use it against me one day?" he asks as he picks up the glass again. "Why even put in the energy when you have no intention of actually following me? Why waste my valuable time on you? I could keep you here, you know," he says as he looks around the room before taking a seat and crossing his legs. "Forever. No one could stop me... no one could find you."

"I know," I say weakly because a part of me believed it.

"Why should I?" he asks after a long pause. "What do you have to offer me?"

I couldn't actually think of anything and there was a long pause before I spoke again.

"What do you want?" I ask and he looks at me before sending a glance down to my stomach.

Oh.

"I've placed you here without magic at your disposal," he says thoughtfully. "I wonder if you have taken my advice and practiced doing wandless magic?"

"I..." I trail off feeling stupid because I haven't.

What have I been doing my with my time? Sleeping... day dreaming... playing with Henry... crying...

"I thought so," he says flatly. He stands up, his glass untouched. "I will come back when you're serious about learning something. I will not waste my time."

I stand up as he puts his cloak back on and starts to walk from the room.

"Wait," I plead and he glances at me over his shoulder.

I can't find any words, so he raises his brows before walking off again.

I don't want to rot in this stupid house any longer and with that thought in mind I tried using magic. I felt the desperate tug in my chest and just before he left, every curtain in the house closed, cloaking us in darkness.

I hold my breath as he removes his wand to open the curtains again, letting in the bright winter afternoon as he looks back at me with an appraising look in his eyes.

"Well," he says as he tucks his wand in his sleeve. "That is something."

I watch him as he looks me over and then he walks back fireplace and takes a seat across from my reading chair. I watch as he picks up the glass and takes a drink.

I feel the pleasure seep through my body as he sets it down, not noticing what I had put in here.

"Take a seat," he says and I nod my head, sitting down at the chair across form him. "Knowledge is power, Ginevra," he says and I agree. "And I will not give you that power unless you show me you can be trusted."

"What does that mean?" I whisper and he gives me a charming smile.

I don't want him to force himself on me again. I couldn't handle that.

"How about we play a little game?" he says as he takes another sip.

I watch his throat as he swallows and when his eyes turn to me, I give him a little smile back. It's painful for me to do, and it felt like daggers in my chest as my lips turned up.

"I will show you how amazing you can be," he says as he leans forward to address me more earnestly. "If you tell me your secrets."

"I don't... I don't have any secrets."

"You're wrong," he says after licking his lips. "Everyone has secrets. I just want full access to your mind. No resisting."

"Can't you do that anyways?" I ask gently as he watches my profile.

"The mind is like a large house," he says as he sits back and crosses his legs. "Like this one," he adds as he waves around him. "There are basic rooms everyone can go in with ease. The front hall... dinning room... even the bathroom," he says with a smirk. "But there are always hidden rooms, locked doors where no one should venture."

I nod my head in understanding, thinking of the hidden door to the attic.

"There's always a room with forgotten things just waiting to be discovered. Give that to me, and I will show you magic."

"Okay," I say softly as I glance at the drink on the table.

"Good. It's an understanding then," he says and I watch as he downs the whole glass with a flick of his neck. "Let's go somewhere more comfortable," he says and I snap him a surprised look. "Go upstairs. I will be up momentarily."

"But..."

"I thought we agreed there would be no resisting," he says and I swallow a large lump in my throat.

I nod my head again and try not to shake as I scurry up the staircase. I don't actually know where he wants me to go, so I end up in my bedroom. When he comes in a few moments later I feel my hands start shaking as I remember the last time he was in here, when I had to fight him off of me... only to lose in the worst way in the end.

"Lay down," he says, nodding to the bed as he pushes his sleeves to his elbows.

"I..." I trail off and look at the mattress. "Um..."

"Lay down," he repeats sharply

I lay down nervously and put my hands on my stomach, knotting the fabric as he sits beside me on the bed, running his hand up my arm.

"I thought-"

"Hush," he cuts me off sharply as he runs his fingers up until they rest against my temple. "Close your eyes."

I close my eyes and lick my lips with my breath coming out in short gasps.

I might have a panic attack.

"That's a good girl," he says as he leans over me more and I can feel him staring at my face. He doesn't smell like anything... it's kind of odd, actually. "Now, just relax. This is going to hurt."

It did hurt. It hurt something terrible, like someone was taking a scalpel to my brain and slicing it to pieces. He spent the better part of an hour intruding in my brain as he sorted through memories and dreams and fantasies.

When he finally pulls out, I'm sweating and breathing heavily.

So's he, to my surprise.

"I'll come back in a few days," he says as he stands up, trying not to sound winded as he rolls his sleeves back down. "Try practicing wandless magic. If you can break yourself out of this house, I will be impressed," he says with a charming smile.

When he's gone, I sleep for two days.

More time passes... days turn into weeks turn into months... January passes without incident and February brings a flurry of snowstorms that chill my bones. Tom comes to me very once and a while to see my progression and rape my mind. I have no idea what he's looking for, but I don't resist. He knows everything about Draco anyways and that's the only secret I've had.

I've mastered closing curtains without a wand and have moved on to lighting candle sticks and fireplaces. A thing that has come in very handy on the cold winter nights after the fire had died out. I'm miles away from being strong enough to break the wards around the house, though, but I keep trying.

Every time Tom comes to visit me, the tumbler of firewhisky goes down... I can see the change in him with each passing session. The poison doesn't kill him, of course, but his skin has started to take on a more waxy sheen and he uses his wand more and more... like the wandless magic that he was trying to get me to master was going away from him.

Even simple spells seem to be a struggle for him and I can see the frustration in his face every time he tries to do something. I don't think he suspects me of anything because he keeps drinking from the tumbler. He keeps going until it's all but empty.

I don't point out my observations in fear of being found out, but I couldn't help but be happy. I would replay my pleasure to my ever present notebook and I would whisper about my conning to Henry who turned out to be a very good listener. He hates Tom and hisses every time the Dark Lord is near so I've taken to hiding him in the attic so he doesn't get killed.

The Dark Lord is not a cat person.

No surprise there.

The sicker Tom gets, the more desperate he seems... and he starts taking my blood two... sometimes three times a week.

Sometimes he drinks it straight from my wrist like a vampire and I just pretend he's Draco kissing me a little _too_ passionately. That's really easily, actually. He reminds me so much of Draco anyways and I just have close my eyes and pretend it's Draco's sharp voice dictating to me instead of the Dark Lord's smooth drawl.

They have so much in common, but some how they're still miles a part.

I still bleed some each month, so that kills any other kind of fears I may have about what's been going on in this house. Even though I still find that green potion resting by my plate each morning during breakfast. I take it even though I have no idea what it is, and I take it even when the potion color changes from green to red as the time passes.

I figure it must be something to keep me healthy or something because I can see no other changes.

When March came with it's rain showers, I start to lose faith in being rescued and when April brought with it the spring time heat... I just knew there was no hope.

It was a stupid thing to wish for anyways and I was musing over it after one of my lessons and the Dark Lord had heard it. They had to care, though... people had to me missing me, right? Why have I been here so long?

"I can assure you that if they had cared for your well being you would not still be here," he said sharply, his eyes were rimmed in red and black. He was getting weaker. "You think that the order with all of their resources would have been able to find you," he says, nodding to the bracelet Draco had given me.

It also made me think of the necklace of my mother's that was still up in my trunk. Of course, they would know where I was. They had to know how to find me and it made me feel sick when I realized that.

"With as diligent as they are, one would wonder why they haven't put in the time and energy to save one abused little girl?" he asks flatly, tilting his head to watch my pain.

I don't respond and he smiles.

"If you take something they actually care about... something they _love_... I promise you they will come running."

"They love me," I say fiercely, breaking my good girl routine as I glare at him.

He smiles that charming smile again as he licks his lips. "You wouldn't be here with me if that was true," he says, making my thoughts go dark because a part of me couldn't help but agree.

He stood up then and walked towards me. I knew what he was going to do, so I put my hair over my shoulder and tilted my neck to the side as he pressed his wand against a vein there. I cringed from the pain that punctured the holes in my skin and I tried not to make a noise as he bent down and started to drink from my neck.

Like a Vampire.

I fucking hate vampires.

When he got what he wanted, he pulled back and I glanced at him. Some of my blood was smudged at the corner of his mouth and he smiled at me as he ran his hand over my face.

"I will show you," he says as he reaches for his glass of firewhisky on the side table. "And you will see," he adds before swallowing it all in one go to wash down the taste of my blood.

Successfully drinking a the rest of the poison with that last gulp.

"I will show you, my darling," he mocks as he stands up, bringing a handkerchief to his mouth to clean the blood. "And you will see that, after all of this, I am the only one who cares for you."

I nod my head, because I can't do anything else, and then I look at the empty glass as he sets it on the table.

I start counting down in my head, waiting for him to fall down dead... but he never does.

"Your nose is bleeding," I say softly as he turns to me.

"What?" he asks sharply as I grab his discarded handkerchief and I stand up until I'm right in front of him.

"Your nose," I whisper as I bring the cloth up to wipe away the blood. "Is bleeding."

He grabs my wrist with his ice cold hand and he stares down at me with narrowed red eyes. For the first time in a long time he looked down at me with suspicious eyes and I held my ground, staring right back until he pushed me back.

He left then, with the handkerchief falling to the ground.

I pick it up as I hear the front door slam and I smile a little to myself when I see his blood smudged on the fabric, right by mine.

_...So long... fair well... __au revoir... auf wiedersehen..._

I smile to myself again, my thoughts dark and brooding.

* * *

All the chairs in the dinning room are floating three feet above the ground and my forehead is beading with sweat as I hold them there, suspended in the air with my magic. I lick my dry lips. I'm getting stronger... I'm kind of pleased by my accomplishment and when Henry meows beside me, I smirk down at him.

"What do you think?" I ask as I turn my hand, making the chairs turn with it. "Do you think I'm getting better?"

I pretend he nods in agreement and I go back to the chairs. At the beginning of the week, I could only raise one... and here I was... raising all twelve.

Maybe the Dark Lord was right... I did have a lot of potential hidden away.

I lick my lips, my cheeks feeling hot. It's a warm day out and I haven't mastered any cool air charms, so the house is like an oven on hot days like today. I can't open the windows and there are no fans to cool me. I just sweat and feel miserable all day.

I hate the humidity.

I pulled my hair back in a loose braid this morning and I'm wearing a yellow sundress my mom had made me that has daises printed on it. It's on the shorter side because I have grown since I wore it last, but I don't mind too much.

It's too hot to care.

I hear the front door slam and all the chairs fall to the ground when I lose concentration. It had been months since I had seen anyone who wasn't the Dark Lord, so when I saw Yaxley with his pig snout and glare, I raise my eyebrows.

"What are you doing here?" I ask I pick up Henry and hug him to my chest.

"His Lordship has asked me to retrieve you," he says as he holds out his hand so I will go with him.

I don't take it right away, so he walks towards me to take my arm like I was a rag doll.

I hesitate and he grips my arm, making me drop Henry. I don't say anything as he roughly pulls me from the house, not even giving me time to grab a pair of shoes. When we get outside, I pause a second to look at the sky. I haven't felt the actual sun on my skin in ages and I close my eyes to inhale deeply, but Yaxley tugs me sharply, shaking me from my daze.

I try to keep up with his long strides and when he Apparates up in front of Folk Hills... I tilt my head in question.

"What-"

Yaxley cuts me off with another tug to my arm and I don't bother asking again.

On the way in, my unprotected foot catches the end of a rather sharp rock and I hiss in pain before limping along. Hating Yaxley and his disregard for my well being shoots him to the top of my kill list as well. I narrow my eyes at the back of his thinning hair and wish him deadly thoughts.

Death Eaters in black robes are wondering around the grounds when we get in and they look so out of place among in the sunshine and beautiful flowers.

It's almost funny, actually.

Death Eaters in Springtime.

When we approach club house five, a very odd feeling starts to settle in my stomach... Something close to fear and when the door is open and I'm pushed in, I swallow hard. Death Eaters are crawling all over the place like roaches and there, sitting at the center of it all in a metal high backed chair is Tom Riddle.

He doesn't frighten me like he used to. I'm too familiar with him now, but I do feel a very primal urge to turn around and hide as he looks up, right into my eyes.

He's leaning back in the chair with his foot tapping impatiently against the marble floor. His elbow is leaning on the arm rest and he's tapping his fingers against his lips, like he was keeping time with music only he could hear.

He looks _horrible_. Like a gaunt ghost of his former self.

His skin is even more wax like and pale than I remember it being just a few days ago and his eyes are rimmed in dark circles... like a corpse...

As I approach with burning feet, I can see that the veins around his temples and jaw are almost black in color, like a person had drawn them on with a fine tipped quill and mapped out their progression all across his face.

The once handsome Dark Lord looked positively ghastly in this light and when his blood red eyes snapped to mine, I gulped.

He didn't say anything, he just looked at Yaxley as he gripped my arm and then nodded to the place right beside his feet. Yaxley seemed to understand what that meant and he pulled me closer to Voldemort, pushing me down to my knees by his chair.

_Seriously?_

"Sit," Yaxley orders gruffly and I feel my brows furrow as I try to adjust myself into a comfortable position by his feet... like a dog.

"Do we not believe in getting the lady shoes?" the Dark Lord asks flatly as he looks at my toes peaking out from underneath me as I move my skirt so I'm not flashing the entire hall my knickers. My feet are almost black from dirt and I'm sure my right foot is bleeding from that sharp stone. "Surely there was time for that."

"I am sorry, My Lord," Yaxley bows his head and I glare at him. He's not sorry at all.

He gets waved off and I look around me questionably.

It's cold in here, like an icebox, and I cross my arms as I glance at the darkly robed death eaters... some of them are even wearing their silver masks for the occasion. Even the Dark Lord is wearing a dark set of traditional wizard's robes that show a hint of green in the thread every time he moves.

I look back at my own yellow dress, thinking I must look sorely out of place. I finger one of the stitched daisies as I imagine what I must look like to an outsider around all this darkness. I'm not wearing any make up either and with out mascara my eyelashes are almost blonde, giving me the look of a twelve year old.

I wonder if any of these Death Eaters feel sorry for me. Here I am, just a young girl in a stupid flowered dress with no shoes on...who was in way over her head in the darkness.

"My Lord!" A young Death Eater with his hood up comes running into the room and he falls to his knees when he gets close to Tom.

When he puts his forehead on the cold ground to get into an even more submissive pose, I roll my eyes.

"The rebels have surrounded the grounds, sir!"

"Of course they have." There's a smirk in Tom's voice and he pulls a piece of hair loose from my braid, twirling it in my fingers until I look at him. "Didn't I tell you?" he says and I frown in confusion. "Take something they actually care about and they will flock to it like a moth to the flame."

What did that mean?

He makes a motion with his with hand and two men come from the shadows with a body lying limp between them. I know instantly who that is, and I try to get up to run towards her, but the Dark Lord grips the back of my neck viciously to keep me in place.

"We only caught her a couple of days ago," he says flatly as he squeezes my neck painfully hard. "And do you see how they gather already?" he asks as they throw Hermione on the ground. "Does it hurt, Ginevra, to know that they were perfectly content to leave you with me, but take their precious mudblood for one day and they're already on the attack. It's depressing... how little they care for you."

A part of me believes that, but I won't tell him he's right.

"I'm the only one you can count on. I'm the only one who cares."

A death eater raises their wand to wake my old friend and Hermione blinks a few times before licking her dry lips and turning over on her back.

"Open the roof," the Dark Lord says and a few of them lift their wands to scale back the roof so the hot spring time sun illuminates us. "I want them to hear this," he says as he stands up and raises his wand to Hermione.

He starts to torture her with his wand and I can't take the screams so I retreat into myself and cover my ears. I start rocking back and forth, wanting it to be over, wanting to be somewhere else. I start singing those songs from the record player again... replaying a few of my favorite things in my mind to make things be alright.

"Stop it!" I hear someone yell. "Stop it, Ginevra!"

It was the Dark Lord and I felt someone tugging my hair back. When my neck snapped to look up, I saw Tom, his face drenched in sweat and an angry scowl on his face.

"You are going to set the whole building on fire. You will stop it now!" he shouts.

I didn't even know what I was doing, but when he stepped back, I could see. The torches that were on the wall were blazing with green flames, rising high into the air. Some were bursting with magic, making random things in the room catch fire as the Death Eaters scurried to fix it.

"As your head of house, I order you to stop," he hisses as he bends down to get into my face. "Now."

I can feel the itch in my chest and the fires start to die down to normal flames. He stares at me for a long time and I can hear Hermione whimpering behind him as he runs his thumb over my lips like he was contemplating something serious.

Just when I thought he was going to say something of importance, the Order busted through the front doors.

Tom jumped away from me and someone from behind grabbed my arm and started dragging me behind one of the large Corinthian columns, far away from the struggle. I leaned against the pillar and tried to catch my breath as the person who dragged me pulled back their death eater hood.

It was Blaise... and he was smiling.

"Hello, lovely," he says with a smirk as he opens his cloak. Strapped across his chest was a leather satchel and he lifts it over his head to hand to me. "Will you hold this for me?" he asks as he dumps it on my lap.

He takes out his wand and blasts a wizard who was running towards us before turning back to me.

"What is this?" I ask as I reach into the bag to pull out a wooden box.

He smiles as he kneels in front of me. "Another fabulous lie," he says as I pop open the lid... inside is a crown... the lost diadem of Ravenclaw. My soul keeper. "I let him believe my mother was trustworthy," he says with an eye roll. "She's probably in the south of France right now, working on husband number nine."

I don't even crack a smile and he gives me a fake pout.

"Your total disregard to my humor hurts my feelings. I only risked everything to save your life," he jokes with his hand on his heart as a battle wages behind us. "This is your rescue mission, doll," he says, pinching my cheek. I push his hand away. "You should be a little more happy."

_Not my rescue mission_, I think bitterly. The Dark Lord's words are making my thoughts dark and I try to shake it off.

There's a duel happening beside us and Blaise stands up to help. I can see the blue cloak of an order member fighting Wormtail and when they kill him with a death curse to the throat, the person who he was dueling with turns to Blaise, his hood falling back.

"I don't see the snake anywhere."

I know that voice.

My breath catches in my throat when I see Draco turn his head to look at me.

"Must be hiding her," Blaise says, lifting his wand to another death eater who's calling him a traitor.

They both come back to me in my little hiding spot and Draco kneels in front of me to study my face. He looks older some how... more world worn and his hair is a bit longer than I remember it being... but his features are still as proud as ever, even with the tired rings under his eyes.

He looks me over closely and then I can see the corner of his mouth turn up in a relieved smile. He leans in like he was going to kiss me but I turn away quickly because I just... I just can't.

"I killed Nagini," I say to cover the slight and to get the look of hurt off Draco's face .

He sits back and they both raise their brows. "What?" Draco asks softly.

"I cut off her head..." I start counting the suns cycles and moon changes on my fingers. Trying to place the time when it happened... seconds before the violent rape. "Weeks... no... months ago."

_Months. _God, that one word sent a pain right through my heart.

"How did you manage that?" Blaise asks over Draco's shoulder like he was impressed.

"I cut her head off with his wand," I say and my voice sounds weird... it sounds detached and far too high for my liking. "He wasn't very happy about that," I say more to myself as I remember what happened directly afterward.

I haven't even thought about that brutal rape since the night that I cried in the bathtub. I just viewed it with cold indifference because I had to, because if I didn't, I felt like my emotions would suck me dry.

With Draco here, staring at me so closely, it was fresh in my memory, like every bruise was back and every wound was open so someone could pour salt all over them.

I hated the feeling and I felt dirty all over again, so I curled a little more into my self as Draco watched my face with an intense look in his silver eyes. Blaise ran off to fight, leaving me alone with Draco. He licks his lips before bringing a hand up to cup my cheek.

"I missed you," he says so softly I barely hear it, but him touching me like that... it reminds me too much of Tom... the way he touched me right before he smacked me and I push his hand away.

He looks heartbroken for half a second before hardening his eyes.

"Here," he says as he pulls something from under his cloak. "Stay here and wear this."

It was Harry's invisibility cloak and when he starts to put it around my shoulders, I still his hands.

"Just stay here," he repeats with his hand on mine. "As soon as they get Granger to safety, they'll be coming back for you."

I felt fire in my veins at that statement. Of course they would get Hermione first. My eyes started to water and my lip started to tremble with out my permission. Why wouldn't they get me first? Why wouldn't Draco just get me out of here now! I've been with _Lord Voldemort_ for _months_. Months of my life... months!

Months being totally alone.

Months of having him rape my mind whenever he wanted.

Months having to heal my wounds by myself.

Months having to do what he wanted me to do.

Months at the total mercy of the Darkest wizard the world had ever known and still I'm not top priority.

Tears slip from my eyes and I hate myself for the weakness but I can't help it. I just want to go home! Why is that so hard? Hermione had only been tortured for a couple of seconds and the Dark Lord said they had only caught her a couple days before so even if something more happened... it hadn't been that long.

My torture had been a slow burn over the course of this entire year... and maybe even since I was eleven if you want to view it closely.

Maybe Tom was right. I doubt this would have even happened if Hermione was never caught... they would have just let me rot at that house.

Draco watches the pain slip over my face and I can feel his stare as I close my eyes and clutch the box to my chest.

"Voldemort's men are under strict orders not to harm you," he says gently, his hand squeezing around my arm. "They would have no qualms about killing Granger. That's why she went first."

I nod my head and open my eyes to look at him. I wanted nothing more than to kiss and hold him, but I just couldn't. There was too much broken inside of me to do it. "I understand," I answer flatly because I do understand.

I get it.

It makes sense.

I just wish someone would take all that logical thinking and throw it out the window. Can't they all see that I'm drowning, that I've been drowning on my own now for a while? Why can't someone do that for me? Because I need it. Because I already feel like I'm dangling off a cliff, holding on by my fingertips.

I just want out of this place! I don't want to be here around these people anymore!

Draco leans in and kisses my forehead quickly. Someone from the Order gets blasted against the wall nearby and we both look at him. I don't know who it is, some black fellow with dread locks and Draco squeezes my arm once more.

"Just stay here, babe," he says as he stands up and removes his wand. "Wait for them to come."

I shrug in indifference and push Harry's cloak off my shoulders. "It hardly matters," I whisper, but he caught it because he gives me a troubled look as I turn against the pillar a bit more.

"Ginny..." he trails of and I glance at him.

"I've been poisoning him, you know," I say softly as I swallow hard. "That's why he looks so terrible. His magic is weak. Even a lumos spells tires him."

He's still just staring at me, his eyes hard and calculating.

"Now would be a good time to kill him," I say coldly as the box Zabini gave me weighs heavily against my lap.

He's in front of me again and he takes my head in his hands, placing a firm kiss against my lips before I can pull away. Then his hand slides down to my neck where he feels the raised punctures that mark my skin.

He pulls back and moves my braid over my shoulder to see them better. I know there's a whole litter there now... Tom had been drinking more and more from my neck with each session and would never heal them. Draco's face changes to something I can't readily identify as he looks at the places where the Dark Lord would take my blood. Then his fingers trace the bruise that rings around my neck from tugging on the necklace.

"This..." he falters for a second as he presses his forehead against mine. I'm not sure if it's because there's too much emotion in his voice, or he's not sure what he wants to say. Either would be surprising for me. "This shouldn't have happened this way."

I put my hand on his as it rests on my neck. He smells like Draco and I lean in and hug him, my arms wrapped around his waist. Hadn't I dreamed of this moment? Didn't I want him? Why was I being so weird about it?

"You're... this is real, right?" I ask pathetically as I pull back, letting him run his hand down my face. "This isn't like... a spell or anything? This is real?"

He studied my face for a moment and then realization set in. Why would I ask such a thing? He must be wondering that... and after thinking it through... I think he found the troubling answer. An answer I would never ever tell him.

"This is real," he says firmly, he jaw set in an angry line. "I will never let us be apart again," he says dangerously. "This is all my fault."

He whispered that last part, like he was talking to himself.

Draco stares at me until the fight drags him back to the center of it, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

The fight wages on behind me and I feel useless once again, but I don't want to fight any more. I don't care about any of it. I just want to go home. Someone gets killed to my left and I watch as a dagger gets dislodged from the death eater's hand. It skitters across the floor until it lands somewhere close to my foot. I eye it... and then pick it up, turning it in my fingers.

I remember this.

It was in the box that Zabini brought out at the dinner. It had killed Dudley Dursley. It must have some kind of magical properties for a wizard to hold on to it. I hold it up and look at my reflection... dark eyes stare back and a strand of red hair falls across my cheek.

It reminds me of a dream I had.

The Serpent and the Queen.

I know where I've seen this dagger before and I play it through my mind once again. The woman with dark hair stranded on the boat. The Dark wizard coming to her and giving her a choice to bring back her children. Blood for Blood... this dagger against her throat... a promise.

I feel a chill go up my spine.

Looking at my reflection with dark and tired eyes staring back... my reflection... his reflection. The man had red hair like mine... red hair like a Weasley. Tom... and a promise and a dagger... I bring the dagger down and look back at the crown still resting along the velvet lining.

The necklace Tom had given me weighs heavily against my chest so I clutch the yellow stone and hold it up to the green light. The firelight catches the cuts in the gem and scatters it across my face.

The woman wore a necklace like this in my dream as well.

A long golden chain and a yellow stone dangling at the end.

I bring the dagger up to my neck and push the blade against the golden chain. I pull at it as the chain digs painfully into my neck, leaving an angry red mark to add to the already painful bruise. I keep going until the necklace snaps and it goes flying off of me... landing somewhere against the wall with a hiss of dying magic.

I stare at it as I rub my sore neck.

Then I look back at the diadem.

If they want to kill him... it will surely kill me because I was bonded with him in more ways than one. The ancient promise... the forbidden magic in this crown... the bonding through our bodies... I stop crying, resolve settling over me as I stand up with the box and dagger in hand. Knowing what I have to do, I walk around the dead and wounded bodies to the heart of the room.

I see Millicent fighting her Death Eater uncle who had introduced her at her coming out during the summer. He kills her when she's too slow to deflect his quick curse and she slumps against one of the pillars. She wasn't the traitor I thought she was and I feel bad for my hateful thoughts towards her, but there's no time for that now.

I'm on a mission, the music in my head playing loudly over the carnage, spurring me forward.

…_.You wait, little girl, on an empty stage... for fate to turn the light on..._

I take no caution with my steps and curses go flying close to my body, some actually hitting the skirt of my dress and tearing holes in it. I can hear my father calling to me, telling me to hide... to run away, but I've already made a decision and I know what the outcome is going to be.

…_.Your life, little girl, is an empty page... That men will want to write on..._

Harry had already played the martyr card against the Dark Lord... and I'm not Harry... I'm not lucky... Dumbldore never prepared me for anything that would happen like he had prepared Harry Potter. I remember after the Chamber of Secrets, Dumbledore brought Harry to his office to talk to him, and he didn't say anything to me. He let McGonagal handle my trauma.

Now they're both dead.

_...You are sixteen, going on seventeen...Baby, it's time to think..._

I'm not Harry. I will not be coming back from this. I have no one who loves me enough to protect me from it and I think I'm okay with that. I think I've known for a while this was going to happen.

…_. Better beware... be canny and careful..._

It just took me a while to figure it out. I'm slow on those kind of things... I'm not smart like Draco... or lucky like Harry...

_... Baby, you're on the brink..._

I wonder if they knew this was going to happen. I wonder...

…_.You are sixteen, going on seventeen..._

When I get to the center of the room, right under the opened roof with the sun beating down, I drop to my knees and carefully open the box again... the crown whining at me as I hold the dagger over it.

…_.Fellows will fall in line..._

I lick my painfully dry lips.

_...Eager young lads and rogues and cads..._

I tighten my shaking hand around the dagger.

_...will offer you food and wine..._

"What are you doing?" I snap my head to see the Dark Lord right in front of me, a nasty gash along his cheek that's oozing dark blood not natural for a living creature.

…_. Totally unprepared are you..._

I lick my dry lips again as I hold the dagger tight, poised right over the crown that's home to our mangled and tangled souls

_... to face a world of men..._

"Don't be foolish," he says darkly, his wand lying in his right hand.

_...timid and shy and scared are you..._

I can hear the hall become quiet... the fight had stopped for both sides and they were all watching me and the Dark lord.

._..of things beyond your ken..._

He glances down to the box and then to the dagger in my hand.

_...You need someone older and wiser... telling you what to do..._

"Give me the crown," he says softly, looking me in the eyes. "Give it to me... now," he orders more sharply.

_...I am seventeen, going on eighteen..._

I feel that itching in my chest...

_...I'll take care of you..._

I hesitate and he clenches his fist.

"Now!" he shouts in anger and my resolve falters as our bond fights to obey him.

"Don't speak to her like that," I hear Draco somewhere behind me, but I ignore it.

He was just as bad, ordering me to do things that he wanted...

Tom holds out his left hand and offers me his open palm. "Give it to me now... and the dagger," he says, looking at the shining blade I have hovering over his precious soul. "Remember," he says darkly. "I am the only one who cares for you. I'm the only one who wants you to be at your best. The others hold you down, the others put mudbloods ahead of you when they all know what a powerful pureblood you are."

I swallow hard. I don't have to do anything I don't want to do. Thinking of my dream and the man in the boat... I know I have the power to do it.

I don't want to be weak anymore.

"No."

I said that so plainly and so firmly. I could feel it then... the bond that was between us broke... Like it was that easy. Like there was a taunt string connecting us together and that one word was a knife cutting through it.

The Dark Lord must have felt it too because he came closer to me and lifted his wand to my chest.

"Ginevra," he says in a dark and deadly voice as the world falls away from us, just leaving him and I to stare at one another. "As your head of house, I command that you give it to me."

I licked my lips again and shook my head. "No," I whisper.

His eyes were enraged and his wand hand shook, but he dropped the hand to his side. He probably wanted to save his magic, not wasting it on me because he was as weak enough as it was.

"No?" he says smoothly, his taunting voice back as his upper lip curls up in a sneer.

"No," I say again, trying to sound stronger.

_...I am sixteen going on seventeen..._

I knew he was going to hit me the split second before it happened. His anger was practically vibrating the walls and I clenched my eyes shut, waiting for the impact as he raised his left hand. He smacked me hard across the face and I fell to the side but caught myself with my arm.

_...I know that I'm naive..._

I didn't cry or feel embarrassed like before... In fact, the smack seemed to spur me into action and the flames of the torches were roaring high into the air as I lifted the dagger and slammed it down at the heart of the crown.

…_.Fellows I meet may tell me I'm sweet..._

I felt like the air had been sucked out of my lungs as the crown hissed and cried out. I felt dizzy as smoke clouded my vision... the building was on fire, but I didn't really care as I slumped to the side.

_...and willingly I believe..._

People started screaming again, curses were thrown above my head as I curled my body.

When I closed my eyes, I was brought back to a memory of me and Draco right after we went boating on that river.

I was sitting in between his legs eating an apple as he told me about our families history... why we hated each other and what had happened years before either of us were born. It was all about love lost, of course... like it always is. Our families were fighting over the Black Hills that was home to one of the purest pockets of magic in the world... If you said the right words any wish would come true.

Black hills... Folk hills...

I curl a little bit more and wish to go home.

I just want to go home.

…_.I am sixteen..._

I wish I could go home.

_...Going on seventeen..._

I _want_ to go home.

_...Innocent as a rose..._

I _need_ to go home.


	19. Chapter 19

_I've always liked you in red._

Tom's voice filters through my head and I try to shake it off. I can't stand it.

_I will show you..._

_Queen Ginny._

I blink hard a few times but my vision is blurry. I clench my eyes shut and then let my head roll to the side as I try to get up.

Just get up.

There's an odd tickling along my chest and then...and then I _feel_ it. The painful sharp burn starts on my stomach and when the pressure gets hotter... I scream.

"I'm sorry." That's Draco's voice and I try to open my eyes again as the pain keeps going, slicing across my body in thin ribbons. My chest. My arms... My neck... My shoulders... "I have to do this. I know it hurts, but I have to."

His voice sounds sharp and upset.

If I didn't know any better I would say that he sounded_ pissed._

I scream again when I feel the pressure against my thigh. I know I'm bleeding. I know I'm covered in open wounds, but I just can't move.

_Blood is what binds us._

"It hurts," I whimper as the burning feeling inflames my whole body.

"I know..." That's Draco's voice again. When I feel a hand on my face, I try to open my eyes but there's smoke... too much smoke.

Smoke and green flames and blood.

He presses something to my lips and when the coppery taste slips over my tongue, I spit it out.

"You have to drink it."

I shake my head.

_Blood is the most important thing._

"Babe, please, you have to drink it."

I won't.

"You have to," he say a little more firmly as he pushes it into my mouth again. The copper tasting liquid spills over my tongue and before I can spit it out, he covers my mouth with his hand and plugs my nose. "Swallow it, Ginny."

I have no choice in the matter.

It feels like I'm swallowing nails. Slicing my throat to pieces in the process. Once it's down, I get only a moment of peace before I feel a fire start to burn my chest into a red hot poker. It begins in my stomach and itches its way up my body. I start clawing at my throat, trying to get it to stop, to deaden the pain... but it keeps going. It keeps burning until I feel like I will never be whole again.

I can imagine my blood dripping from the open wounds as my body becomes engulfed in flames. I feel my right arm shaking uncontrollably as my body is overcome with the heat.

I scream loudly when someone lifts me from the ground, igniting every wound into a white hot fury that feels like hell.

I can barely breathe... it feels like something is covering my mouth and nose and I can't catch my breath.

"I've got you," I hear Draco say against my temple. "Just keep breathing."

I can't.

I hear shouting and screams and yells of desperation.

"Just keep breathing," he says before darkness pulls me back in unconsciousness. "Just breathe," he says before blackness takes me.

Just breathe.

_Just breathe._

Why is that so difficult all of sudden?

* * *

When I wake... Wake... I wake because I'm alive. I wake because I have to and when I blink up at a familiar cracked ceiling, I feel a frown turning my face down.

What's happening?

Aunt Murial's guest bedroom at Shell Cottage fills my senses. I glance around at the light peach walls and flowered curtains as my body lays prone on the bed. I can hear the sea outside of the cracked window and I shake my head... trying to focus my mind to get up.

Just sit up.

My movements are slow and sluggish as I bring a hand up to my forehead. My long bangs are out of my face and when I touch my hair... I feel two french braids... tight against my scalp.

That can only mean one thing.

_Mom._

I sit up and hiss in pain when my whole body aches in protest. I blink back a few tears and I swing my legs over the side of the bed. It's a chore to move and I clench my eyes shut for a moment before taking a cautious look down my body.

I'm wearing a large set of striped pajamas that do not belong to me and I stare at the terrible yellow and pink fabric for a moment before making a face. With sore and slow movements, I slowly unbutton the top to show my torso. There are white bandages wrapped all around my stomach and chest... even my upper arms and thighs.

What?

Dread pools in my stomach at what that could mean and I bite my lower lip so hard I feel like I might draw blood.

Blood.

There's always freaking blood.

_I've always liked you in red... _

I shake off Tom's voice and start peeling back the bandage by my shoulder. When I see the symbol there, sliced into my skin, I narrow my eyes. Everything in my body screams in protest as I stand up and drag myself to the carved mirror embedded into the wall to check them out.

There are sea shells and star fish etched into the peach colored walls. They seem to dance as I step across the wooden floors with a pain induced snarl on my face.

I ignore them.

I pull back the rest of the bandage that reaches down to my collar bone once I reach the mirror. It looks like some kind of ancient rune had been carved into my skin with a scalpel and I frown deeply at the thought. The cut is red and shiny in the sun, just starting to heal over in a scab.

_I'm sorry. I have to do this. I know it hurts... _

Draco's voice floats in my mind and I quickly put the bandage back when I hear a toilet flush. I don't know what to expect, so I grab a nearby horse decoration to defend myself as the door knob starts to twist.

I hold my breath, expecting the worst, until the door swings open to reveal my mother. She's holding a cup of tea and she freezes in the door way as her dark eyes get wide. I stare at her, still holding the figurine like it would protect me from whatever darkness was lurking just beyond.

There's no shelter from the darkness. I should know that.

She drops the cup, letting it shatter against the ground with her mouth open in shock. Then she comes running towards me...

"Oh, my girl," she starts to cry as she embraces me in a firm hug. I drop the decorative horse. "My poor baby!"

I scream when she holds me too tight because of the pain in my body and she backs up quickly like I had burned her.

"I'm sorry!" she says. She stands back and covers her mouth with both of her hands as she looks me over. "You're awake!" she drops her hand and smiles, her eyes swimming with tears that roll down her cheeks.

My mother has lost weight since I last saw her and the roots of her once vibrant hair are starting to show shades gray and white. It looks like she's aged ten years from the last time I saw her on the train platform and I wonder if my life has had the same affect on me.

I wouldn't doubt it.

"We weren't sure if you were ever going to wake up!" she starts sobbing as she takes my hand and holds it in between hers. I try not to squirm from her touches. "I'm so happy." she's crying so hard I can barely understand her words. "I... Oh... Ginny, I'm so glad you're okay!"

I'm not okay. Not really, but I don't want to ruin her happy moment so I nod my head, letting a little smile turn the corner of my mouth. It feels wrong on my face.

"Yeah..."

That's all I say. That's all I _can_ say and she wipes off her face with the sleeve of her cardigan before shaking her head.

"You should lay down," she says as she comes behind me and starts ushering me back to the bed. "You need your rest. After all you've been through."

I give her a suspicious look. I wouldn't put it past Tom to do this to me. To make me believe I was safe with my mother just so he could show up and crumble all of those dreams with one cruel word.

He's evil like that.

"What are these marks on my body?" I ask seriously, not ready to believe she's real just yet.

My voice sounds weird and scratchy. I don't like it.

"Draco Malfoy did some very complicated blood magic," she whispers. She pushes me into bed and props up the pillows behind my head.

It reminds me of the books he was always reading but never told me why. All those books about blood magic and runes and spells... I narrow my eyes at the thought of him keeping me out of the loop yet again as my Mom stares down at me.

"Your brothers were yelling at him something awful, but it saved your life," she says as she sits down on the bed and moves her hand to my forehead like she was feeling my temperature. I gently push her away, not wanting to be touched. "I think you should keep them for a few weeks... before we heal them," she whispers as she looks into my eyes, putting her hand on my cheek again. "To make sure the magic sticks."

I resist pushing her hand away again.. she just looks so happy. I can't take that away from her. Not if she's real... not if this isn't some terrible prank on my mind.

"How are you feeling?" she asks. I spare her a little look that makes her swallow the question bitterly. "Yes, silly question. How about some tea?"

That's a very Mom question to ask. Whenever there's anything serious happening in someone's life, my Mom will suggest tea... Like she needs the distraction because she just couldn't handle the heaviness of real life.

_When in doubt, make tea._

"Why are we here?" I ask, looking around the room once more.

This cottage was part of my childhood, a safe haven from summer days spent at the beach. When the Dark Lord would rape my mind, he would have seen this at some point. The time when I was happiest in my youth, before he came and tore everything apart with his demented ambitions.

I could see him wanting to ruin this memory for me, so I scoot away from my mother and start biting my fingernails.

"It's an Order safe house, dear," she smiles at me and tucks the cover carefully around my body. I study her face, trying to find some lie in her voice. "One of the safest in the country."

Right.

"Where is everyone?" I ask, like I expected my whole family to come rushing in to welcome me.

I roll my eyes at the thought. I should know better than that even if this is real. If there was a totem pole of importance, I would be solidly placed at the bottom.

"There's been a... situation," she says carefully and I give her a hard look because I am in no mood to be babied. "At camp Lux. They're going to try to liberate it," she gives me a weak smile. "You-know-who still has his strong hold—"

"Is he dead?" I ask sharply, my body suddenly cold and shivering.

She doesn't say anything for a few moments and then she starts crying again. "Ginny, I am so sorry for what you've been through!"

She reaches out to touch my hand and I slyly pull away so I can chew on my nails some more.

"He's not dead," I say flatly and she shakes her head after staring at me for a few long moments.

I retreat more into myself as I lean against the headboard with my thoughts getting darker by the second. I imagine Tom and all of the terrible things he had done to me and all the terrible things I wish would happen to him...

Why won't he just die?

Why won't _I _just die?

"I hope you don't mind," she whispers and I glance at her. She opens the wicker night stand by my side and pulls out my note book. That gets my attention and I sit up. "While you were asleep... I read..."

I snatch it away from her and she looks surprised by my sudden movement as I pet the cover and flip through the pages to make sure it's intact.

"So you know what happened," I say flatly as I cradle it to my chest once I'm sure it's alright. I glance at her again as she nods her head, her eyes watering.

"We tried so hard to get you away from him," she says and I don't really believe that, so I look away. She's starts crying hard, so I look at the window, uncomfortable by her emotions. "We couldn't get past his wards... they were too strong. We tried... all of us tried."

She cries for a while and I let her hold my hand before I pull back again.

"Your father is going to be so relieved," she whispers. I glance at her as I think of my Dad with his glasses and silly love for all things muggle. "He has barely slept... we barely slept... since you were away from us."

"You must be tired then," I say sharply and she swallows hard before fiddling with the covers, smoothing out the crinkles so she has something to do with her hands.

I don't say anything after that and a thick silence hangs in the air.

"Did he hit you often?" she whispers after a life time of waiting and I wince at the memory of him smacking me in front of Order members and Death Eaters alike. "I saw... at Folk Hills... the way he..." she trails off like she was too upset to keep going and she wipes tears away before continuing."Did he do that a lot?"

"Only twice," I answer because it was true and there was no point in lying about it. It was already bad and she had read my notebook, so she knew.

"That's two times too many," she says, anger making her voice high. "That man deserves terrible things!"

She starts ranting about how terrible Tom is and I watch her as she spits out the hatred for the Dark Lord. My Mom. My Mom who I haven't seen in over half a year. My mom who I barely recognized anymore.

My mom.

When she looks at me again, I stare into her brown eyes for a few moments... eyes that people say I have... I find them to be genuine in their emotions. She really is my Mom. I don't think magic could fake that look and I feel the tightly wound coil in my chest start to loosen when I realize that this is real. I'm with my Mom and I'm away from the Dark Lord.

Hitting me wasn't the worst thing that he did. I look at Mom again as she spits out hate for Tom Riddle and I bite my lower lip.

Should I tell her about the thing that never happened?

That's how I think of it anyways.

I don't like giving it a name and I never wrote it in my notebook so she doesn't know anything about it. The r-a-p-e word is like a cancer in my mouth and I can't bear to say it out loud. I flinch at the thought and worry my lip between my teeth a little harder.

Maybe I should tell her. It would be good, I think... to tell someone... I never wrote it down because that would make it too real... but... I sit up straighter and let her take my hand again. I have no one else to talk to about it, anyways. The Dark Lord had killed Dr. Carol because of me... and I can't... I should tell her...

Maybe she'll try to hold me. I don't think I would push her away this time.

"Mom..." I say her name, sounding like my old self with my voice soft and gentle.

She stares at me as I try to find the courage to admit the humiliating truth, but she beats me to it.

"After reading your notebook... I was so sad, Ginny," she's still talking and I hold on a littler tighter to my notebook. "I was so sad about what happened to you... all the terrible things you had to see... you had to live though..." I nod my head.

It had been a lot to go through and there was even more to divulge. Even more to hate about it...

"I can just thank God nothing worse happened..."

That catches my attention and I look at her. I _really_ look at her. Her eyes are questioning as she says that to me... she looks so sad.

"At least you're alive," she whispers in a broken voice. "At least you are safe with us now, away from him and that terrible life... it could have been worse."

I stare at her for another long moment before I feel the tears tickling the corner of my eyes.

I realize now that I will never be able to tell my mother about the thing that never happened.

My lower lip trembles pathetically and I nod my head. "Yeah," I say with a short head nod as my fingers pick at a thread in the cover until it unravels. My voice is thick with emotion now, and I cough to rid it of the sadness as I give her a small smile. "It could have been worse."

She looks relieved for half a second before going on about the Dark Lord and what a horrible person he is as I lay back and stare at the ceiling.

"When the boys get back," she says as she touches my cheek again. "They are going to be so pleased to see you. We have all been so miserable with you gone, but now maybe we can find some light in this darkness."

I don't respond and she squeezes my arm.

Now, at this moment, I realize I can never tell _anyone_ in my family about what else happened with Tom. I would never be able to tell them that he forced himself on me because I don't want to break them like it had broken me.

War was different. People were fighting, dying by curses, hits... pulls... slaps... that was okay to talk about. Sexual violence was a whole other level and I just knew I would never tell them. It was going to have to be my private pain. It was easier to keep a secret than admitting to it.

So I just nod my head and let her rant on.

Thinking of Tom makes me think of that house and thinking of that house makes me think of... Henry..

I have my notebook... so they had to have been able to get it out of Riddle Manor somehow.

_They got my notebook when they could never get me_.

The bitterness makes my heart go cold, but when I think of my furry little cat, I can't stay angry.

"Where's Henry?" I ask. He could be dead in that house. I sit up and look around me like he could be hiding somewhere in the room. "Where's my cat?"

I start to panic and I even go to get out of the bed, ignoring my mother as she raises her brows in surprise.

"Where's Henry?"

"Hold on," my mom puts her hand on my shoulder. "We have him."

She gets up and when she comes back into the room, she has a grumpy looking Henry held awkwardly in her arms.

"That boy with dark hair was able to get him... and your trunk," she says, nodding to the wall where I guess my trunk is, but I don't care. I reach out for Henry and smile when he hops on my lap. "A secret keeper was killed during the fight. The wards were broken." she explains.

I hold him against my chest and kiss his head as he wiggles in my arms uncomfortably. I'm holding him too tight, he wants to get away... but I don't let him and he meows in displeasure as I huddle him against me.

I forget about my mother as I start whispering to Henry... because... because that's how I've been doing things for a while now, and I don't know how to talk to my Mom anymore. I can feel her staring at me and I look up from scratching Henry's stomach to see. She's staring at me so oddly now... like she knew... like she knew I wasn't the same and I never would be.

"I'm..." I lick my lips as I look back down at Henry's head, petting his back. "I'm tired," I tell her because I want her to go away.

"Of course..." she nods her head with her voice odd and light.

"Could you... can I go to sleep... on my own?"

"Of course," she repeats, giving me an uncomfortable smile.

When she leaves, I get up to look out the window with Henry still pressed against my chest like a rag doll. A few seconds later my door busts open. Henry jumps under the bed as I turn around in defense.

It's Daphne Greengrass with her face all aglow.

"You're back!" she calls as she comes towards me and hugs me tight. I yelp in pain and she backs away quickly. "Sorry!" she calls as she pulls me so we're both sitting on the bed. "Your mother said not to bother you, but I just had to come see."

I look her over as she gushes about how happy she is now that I'm awake. Her hair, once long and curled, is now cut short, almost to the nape of her neck and when she sees me looking, she touches it.

"Oh," she says as she narrows her eyes. "At the battle of Hogwarts a death eater singed off my hair. Singed!" she shouts in anger. "Can you imagine! Singed off my lovely hair! I had to cut inches off to make it normal looking again. Inches! I smelt like burned hair for days! It's taken ages to grow back" I can tell she's pissed off about it and I actually start smiling just because it's so ridiculous.

So many died during that battle and here she was, bitching about her hair.

"I have to say," she says as she looks at me. "I think you are the only person who gained weight during this war."

I raise my brows, my lips turning into a firm frown as I look down at my body.

"What?" I ask flatly and she's quick to recover.

"Not in a bad way!" she says as she reaches out to touch my arm. "It's just... you were getting so skinny last I saw you. You looked like... like a skeleton... Now you're a normal weight. That's all.. that's all I meant to say."

"Well," I say sharply as I cross my arms under my breasts. "Lord Voldemort kept me well fed," I say bitterly and she realizes her error and apologizes quickly. "Why aren't you with the others?" I ask as I spare her a glance. "Isn't there a coup or something happening?"

"I'm not a fighter," she admits as she taps her fingers against her knee. "I just kind of got in the way at Hogwarts. Not all of us are meant for war. Your Mom's been taking care of me," she says, giving me a smile. "My parents... they took my sisters into hiding right after Christmas," she says, her eyes turning sad as she looks at me. "I haven't seen them since. I don't know where..."

"Is Pansy here?" I ask to cut her off because I don't want to have to comfort her about not seeing her family. I feel like a bitch but I honestly can't care about it right now. "Are the rest of yours friends?"

"Pansy's still alive. She's fighting with the Order," she says. "She's a good dueler. You haven't seen what she can do," she says, her eyes lighting with fire. "Millicent died..."

"I saw that," I tell her honestly and she nods.

She starts naming off the others... Who lived and who died and what happened while I was away for so very long. Draco and Blaise survived, of course. Cho still lives and so do her parents... A lot of Draco's group managed to live through the battles that had went down over the course of the long months I was locked away but a few had perished...

Everything dies eventually. I just hope Tom Riddle will fall into a very terrible death very soon.

I look out the window as she talks non stop and wonder how the sea would feel against my skin. I'm like a new person.

New person, new mind... new skin.

But she just keeps talking. It's like she has to fill each moment of silence without the help of someone else contributing to the conversation. Daphne has always been a talker and I guess I can't fault her for going to the one thing she knows best. It must be very awkward to talk to me now.

_When in doubt, talk._

"I want to go outside," I say, cutting her off and she stops short.

"Um..." I start to push off the bed and I bend down to get Henry.

"Come here, you," I say as I pull him to me from his hiding spot under the bed.

He bats and hisses as I tug him out and I just laugh at him as I start out of the room with Daphne hot on my heels.

"Um, Ginny... are you sure you're okay to go outside?"

"I'm fine," I say flatly as I hop down the stairs.

I know my way around Shell Cottage.

We used to come here when I was a child and I could run my way through these halls with my eyes shut if I had to. I know all the rooms and all the hallways by heart. Thinking of my younger days makes me think of my brothers... and Charlie...

I shake off the thought of his dead body as I cuddle Henry close.

A part of me wishes I would have never woke up.

Mom's in the front living room with Bill's wife, Fleur. When she sees me walk past, she gets up and calls my name. I ignore her and keep walking until I get outside, not even bothering to spare her a glance.

Once the fresh air hits my face, I pause and close my eyes, tilting my head up to the sun.

I take a few moments to just take it in...

It feels like freedom.

"Who else is staying here?" I ask after a couple minutes because I know Daphne and my Mom are behind me.

Watching me.

Staring at me.

Feeling bad for me.

I let Henry hop out of my arms to explore as I glance behind me.

"Just us right now," Daphne answers because my Mom is just staring at me in the saddest way. "Most of the men in your family stay here... and your brother's wife and child," she adds. I know she's talking about Fleur.

"Child?" I say quickly once I realize she said that and Mom nods her head.

"You have a niece," My mom says with a weak voice. "Little Victoire."

I let my cold exterior falter for a moment when I think of the new family connection before letting myself shake it off.

"Who's still alive?" I ask flatly. My voice is sounding very cruel, but I can't help it. I don't know any other way to be anymore. "I know that Charlie..." I stop when I think about it.

How he fell. How it took two seconds for the Dark Lord to kill him. I look for Henry again and find him playing with some drift room. I go and pick him up... he wiggles in my arms, but I don't let him go.

"Your father's alive," Mom says quietly, tears threatening to fall again as she watches me walk back towards them. "Bill," she swallows hard like she was reliving some terrible memory. "George... and Ron..." She starts crying again and she pulls a tissue from her pocket.

That meant that Percy and Fred were dead. That meat that three out of six of my brothers had died during the war and I hated the Dark Lord all over again.

"How?" I ask, sending a little look to Daphne as she crosses her thin arms, watching me like I was a circus attraction.

"F-Fred..." Mom starts sobbing and Daphne pats her arm.

"I think Fred died during the battle of Hogwarts," she answers for my mother. "Something fell on him," she says and Mom shakes her head and mumbles something about going to the loo. She disappears inside and Daphne waits for the door to close before she steps down to get closer to me and Henry. "Percy was killed during the siege at Folk Hills..."

"The siege?" I say, blinking against the light. "That's what you're calling it?"

She doesn't say anything for a few moments and I turn back to the sea, looking at the rippling waves. "Granger is at Malfoy Manor if you want to see her," she says like it would please me. "She's probably sleeping. She sleeps all the time," she comments.

I feel something bitter in my heart at the mention of Hermione, but I try to stamp that down because it isn't fair. It's not her fault everyone thinks she's more important than me.

I lick my lips and start walking towards the water. I let Henry jump from my arms because I don't think he'll appreciate it.

Daphne comes behind me as I roll up my pants. "Where does Draco stay?" I ask timidly, trying to act like I don't care.

"There's a camp at Yellow Springs," she says as I walk towards the sea. "A few houses survived the destruction." The destruction? I missed a lot. "Most of the rebel army stays there... Malfoy Manor is set up as a medic station." I glance at her and she smiles. "I know, can you imagine, Mrs. Malfoy... dealing with all those sick and wounded people!"

She snorts in laughter and I smile a little too at the thought. How ridiculous it seems.

"The fireplace here is connected to those two places. You turn the knob once for the Zabini's home at Yellow Springs, twice for Malfoy Manor. The line is closed to all other outside connections," she explains.

Malfoy Manor... it makes me think of Draco, envisioning his handsome face hovering over me and smiling down.

Why isn't he here right now?

"What is camp Lux?" I ask as we walk towards the water. I close my eyes when I feel it crash against my legs.

How wonderful it is to be outside.

It's been ages.

"My mom said... that's where everyone is... they're trying to liberate it?" I fumble awkwardly, trying to remember what she had told me.

"Camp Lux is where the Dark Lord was holding all the undesirables," she says softly. "Some of them were prisoners of war, but most are patients that were deemed unfit for life. The ones taken from St. Mungos..."

"Like Blaise's Aunt?"... And Neville's parents, I mentally add, but don't say because I'm not sure Daphne would care.

"Yeah... I guess so," she says with a head nod.

I don't say anything else as I stand in the ocean. I close my eyes and let my head fall back again. I didn't even realize I was crying until Daphne put her arm across my shoulders.

I slink out of the embrace awkwardly because my skin feels like it's crawling when someone touches me.

"I thought Draco was going to go mad, you know," she whispers as I quickly wipe my eyes with my sleeve. The tight braids are starting to hurt my head, so I carefully undo them as she keeps talking. "When you were taken. He's so particular about his plans... he didn't foresee that happening. He was a mess and Draco hardly lets himself get that way..."

"Then why did it take so long for anyone to help me?" I ask sharply once my hair is free and tumbling down my back. She raises her brows.

"We couldn't get to you. We tried..."

"Not hard enough," I cut her off and she licks her lips. "I have this stupid thing," I say as I hold up my arm to show the bracelet. "He knew where I was..."

"The wards..."

"The only reason anyone helped me was because of Hermione. If they didn't find her... I would have rotted in that place... with him..."

Just thinking of Tom Riddle and his red eyes makes me shake and I try to stomp down my fear as I swallow hard and look at the horizon.

"Why do you think she let herself get caught?" she whispers and I spare her a little look before the door to the cottage slams open.

"Ginny!"

George comes running from the cottage, straight towards me. My heart leaps to see my brother alive and happy to see me... but when he gets closer, I see what he intends to do, and I hold up my hands to stop him.

"Don't hug me," I warn him when he gets close enough and he stops at arms length. "It will hurt."

I learned that lesson.

"It is so good to see you," he says, leaning in to grab my face so he can kiss my forehead. Emotion swims in his voice "It's been too long."

"I agree," I tell him.

He pulls back and smiles down at me, his smile crooked with sadness. He must miss Fred a great deal.

I miss Fred a great deal too. I will never see him again... or Percy... or Charlie... The sadness is so thick it nearly makes me want to fall into the sea and drift away. I never get to say goodbye to anyone.

"Gin!" There's another yell from the house and I swallow my depression as Ron comes running towards me. Harry Potter is hot on his heels, looking very serious. "We thought you would never wake up..." he has his arm in a sling and a rather nasty looking cut is across his forehead.

"But here she is..." George says as he motions to me. "Looking as radiant as ever."

He looks at Daphne and winks.

She blushes.

I frown and turn away.

"How did the... thing go?" I ask awkwardly as I cross my arms after Harry gives me an odd sideways hug. He looks different somehow. Darker... older... I barely recognize him. "The camp thing."

"We lost a few good men," George says seriously. "But we were successful," I see a smile tilt the corner of his mouth. "The camp is ours."

I guess that's a good thing. I look to Ron because I haven't seen him in so long, and he gives me an awkward smile.

"I take it.. everyone we know is okay?" I ask softly because I don't think I could take anymore bad news right now.

"In a way, yeah," Ron says, rubbing the back of his neck as Harry stares at my profile like his life depended on it. I push some hair behind my ears when I feel his stare on me like fire."Dad is fine... Bill is fine..."

I look at George and he rolls his eyes at the bland way in which Ron is speaking.

"And Draco?" I ask.

I don't know why I keep asking about him. I'm starting to sound silly.

"Malfoy's alright," Ron answers dryly.

"And Zabini?"

I don't know why I'm asking about him either.

"He's great, anyways..." Ron reaches out and squeezes my arm. "How are you?"

"How are you?" George snorts at the question and then he hits Ron's head with his back hand.

Daphne laughs.

"Are you seriously asking that question?"

"Well..." Ron's ears burn and he gives me a sheepish look.

"Well..." George mocks him and I give him a little smile. I had missed my brothers. It's been too long since I've seen them. "It's not like she was a prisoner of war for half a year. So dense, this one," he says, nodding to Ron.

I don't really know what to say, so I just nod my head.

"Dad's inside, nursing a pretty terrible curse to his leg," George tells me. "He'd really like to see you, Gin."

I nod my head again.

I'm being so terribly awkward about all this but I can't help it. I've been away from them for so long I don't know how to be around them anymore.

It's like meeting a new person.

I follow them inside and I find my father sitting in the living room. His leg is propped up on a foot rest and Mom is trying hard to heal a nasty looking cut on his leg.

"Dad?" I ask, hardly believing he's real.

He puts on his glasses and gives me the largest, goofiest grin I've ever seen.

"Ginny Bean!"

I wince at the nickname, remembering when Tom used it. I walk towards him as I try to banish all thoughts of the Dark Lord from my mind. I will not let him bother me any more.

Before all of this, I would imagine the old Ginny would run to my father and hug him tightly around the neck... overcome with happiness.

I don't do that.

Instead, I give him a side hug to not hurt my wounds and his eyes start watering as he hugs me back.

"How's your leg?" I ask quickly so he doesn't start crying as well.

I couldn't take it if my father was crying around me too.

I take a seat on the foot rest in front of him where his leg is propped up, bandaged and smelling of medicine.

"It will heal," he says as he reaches forward to squeezes my hand. "Most things heal with time," he says, giving me a crooked smile around his crooked glasses.

"Do you think that's true?" I say quickly, hopefully, and my cheeks heat when I realize everyone is staring at me.

Time is all I ever seem to have.

"Of course it's true," my father says with a sad smile.

I nod my head and bring a hand up to my neck as I fold back into myself.

"It's so good to have you back," he says honestly. "Are you hungry?"

I can't help but smile a little at that. It's a very Weasley thing to ask.

_When in doubt, eat. _

"I am actually," I admit as my stomach growls.

"Your Mom made a plum pie yesterday..."

"She would hardly want something like that, Arthur," my Mom chastises. "Probably something more substantial. How about I make you a nice meal, dear?" she says, looking at me earnestly. "I could whip something up."

"I'm hungry," Ron adds and George hits his head again.

"You haven't been in a coma for three days, idiot," George says. "You can wait."

Mom shakes her head at my brother's behavior before looking back at me.

"I could make you some soup or heat up some chicken..."

My mom's voice sounds stronger now than before because she's in a position she's comfortable with.

_When in doubt, cook_.

"I actually would like the pie," I say softly because I never had anything sweet when I was stuck at Riddle Manor.

No dessert puddings or cake was available to me and I just realized I would give my left kidney for just one slice of plum pie.

"Would that be okay?" I ask softly as I look around me. They're all staring at me, like they were waiting for me to snap and start biting their necks.

"Of course it would," Dad says and then he looks at George. "Get your sister pie!"

"Do you hear that, Gin?" George says as he gets up to do as my father says. "I've been ordered around like a bloody house-elf since you've been gone."

He smiles as he goes towards the kitchen and I start biting my nails as a silence falls over the room.

Conversation only starts back up again when George comes back into the room with a plate of pie and a fork. He hands it to me with much ceremony and my eyes devour the dessert as my tongue starts to water.

How long it's been since I had something sweet.

I go to take a bite, but I stop myself.

Something doesn't feel right.

With out even thinking, I get up and walk myself into the kitchen. I take a seat at the dining room table and I put the plate down in front of me. I grab a napkin, putting it across my lap, pausing a second as I glance at the chair I'm sitting in. This one won't trap me if I don't eat.

Thanks goodness.

I lick my lips once before carefully cutting a piece off with the side of my fork. I close my eyes as I take the first bite and I feel my whole body relax when I swallow.

It tastes like heaven.

When I open my eyes, I look towards the doorway where everyone is standing... staring at me like I was a circus freak. Even my Dad with his bad leg had gotten out of his seat to watch me and I take my napkin and wipe off my mouth before explaining to them my odd actions.

"I'm sorry," I say because the way they're looking at me makes me feel wrong. "I'm just... I'm so used to eating at a table."

Because I had been trained that way.

My father limps into the room and when he gets right by me, he puts his hand on my shoulder. "You can eat where ever you damn well please," he says, his voice firmer than usual. "You can grind your crumbs into your sheets if you wanted. No one will stop you."

"I guess being kidnapped by Lord Voldemort gives you all kinds of free passes," George jokes before Fleur, of all people, hits his chest to shut him up.

I nod my head and give my father a thankful smile.

I don't move, but everyone else takes seats around the table.

"Might as well have some myself," George says as he cuts himself a slice from the pie at the center of the table. "Payment for labor," he says, giving me a smirk.

I glance around me as I finish eating the pie. My Mom, Dad, George, Ron, Fleur... Even Daphne and Harry... it all just seems so surreal to me. Eventually, Bill comes blazing through the fireplace with a baby in his arms and he introduces me to his daughter with enthusiasm.

Enthusiasm I try hard to match, but I fall short awkwardly.

With each tick of the clock, the more comfortable I become with the family I had loved so much.

I spend the rest of the day in the living room, speaking with my family like the war wasn't happening and life was beautiful. After a while, I started to feel more like my own self even with the sad cloud hanging over the room of a family half taken by death.

By the time the sun set... I was all in line to forgive each and every one of them for what I had viewed as their indifference towards me. Even though we had all changed in different ways over the course of this war...Sometimes being with them felt like it did before... before when things were right and happy and true.

Even Fleur didn't seem to annoy me.

"Would you like to hold her?" Bill had asked after his child was done nursing from his wife's chest. "Aunt Ginny," he teased and I shook my head.

"Not really," I admit as I stare at the little bundle in his arms. "I might drop her or something..."

"You won't," he says as he places her in my arms like I had no say in the matter.

I never have a say and I sigh before looking down at her.

She has blonde hair like Fleur but there's something in her features that is dominantly Weasley. That thought pleases me and I feel a little smile tug the corner of my mouth when she opens her eyes.

She's still so new.

It makes me think of myself from the beginning of the summer.

How very young and silly I was then.

I lean down and place a kiss against her head, inhaling that wonderful baby smell that makes me feel warm.

My stomach turns and I look up only to find everyone staring at me once more.

I pass the baby off quickly and go back to trying to blend into the background. My safe place. As the hours pass, my father finally pulls me to the side to speak to me about my time at Riddle Manor. What happened to me, what potions I was taking... what conversations I had with the Dark Lord.

I couldn't handle it and I think he realized that right away because he backed off and offered to play a card game with me, but I just couldn't do it.

There were too many people.

"I'm going to bed," I say quickly before picking up Henry and practically running upstairs to the room I had woken up in.

I slide into bed and pull the covers over my head as I clench my eyes shut and breathe in deeply. In and out.

In and out.

_Just breathe._

Henry fights his way out of my cover cave and once I'm by myself, I curl my body into a ball, trying to make myself as small as possible.

_When in doubt, disappear._

I start thinking about Draco as I fall into my own thoughts. His absence right now is weighing heavily on my heart and before I know it, I feel tears running down my cheeks. It's so ridiculous. I need to stop crying so much... I thought I was all out of tears anyways but I guess I was wrong.

It's like a Ginny Weasley Manifesto...

_When in doubt, cry. _

* * *

It took two more days before I saw anyone outside of my immediate family that wasn't Daphne Greengrass or the random Order member that would show up.

Half the time I wouldn't know who they were and I rarely got a moment to myself.

It was kind of irritating, actually. I went from total solitude at Riddle Manor, to constantly being in the company of two or more people at all times.

It was exhausting.

I finally broke away from my brother's, who are playing some kind of board game in the front room, to catch a moment to myself in the kitchen.

I make myself a cup of tea and I take a seat at the kitchen table, staring at the dark cuts in the ancient wood as I hold the cup between my hands. My thoughts are all over the place and weird. Halfway between logic and insanity and I just wish... I just wish I had that record player with me so I could lose myself in that music from Riddle Manor.

I had built quite an imaginary life in those songs.

I take a sip of tea and relax my body. I've taken off the bandages because they were itching my skin, but the wounds are still fresh and sometimes they burn.

They burn right now, actually.

But I've honored my mother's wishes and I will not have them healed...not until we're sure the magic holds. Maybe then she'll stop keeping vigil at my bedside each time I fall asleep for the night. It's like she thinks I'll never wake up again once I close my eyes.

Sometimes I wish that was true.

The fireplace flames to life after a few minutes of peace, and I stand up quickly when I see the two men in the grate... they look like men now...

I feel a blush staining my cheeks as Blaise and Draco stand on the other side of the table.

"Hello," Blaise talks first with his brow raised in amusement as he takes in my surprised face.

Like there wasn't a war to be fought.

His hair is even shorter than I remember it ever being and he's wearing a dark outfit with some kind of cylinder tube strapped across his chest like a satchel.

"Nice to see you among the living."

"Shut up, Zabini," Draco says firmly and I glance at him.

He's looking handsome as always. It makes my heart ache... and then an overwhelming anger courses through my body. Why is he here now? It had been days since I've been awake and here he was, acting like it was nothing.

Blaise rolls his eyes and then Henry scurries out from under the table to welcome them.

"Henry, you old thing," Blaise smirks as he picks up the cat.

I watch Draco as he glances at the cat. He's wearing a pair of dark slacks and a light weight blue shirt that has three buttons at the top. He looks so put together, even if his hair has an unkempt look a little too messy for a Malfoy. I look down at the old stripped pj's I've been living in and feel shabby.

He always makes me feel that way.

"You're getting fat, Henry," Blaise says, weighing him up and down in his hands like he was a scale. I can feel Draco staring at me, but I try not to look at him as I focus on Zabini."They need to stop feeding you."

"Stop holding him like that," I whisper as I walk around the table to correct him because I can see how unhappy Henry is. "Hold him normally."

Zabini snorts. "I remember saying something very similar to you," he says with a twinkle in his eye as he looks at me. "How he has grown on you," he says as he looks down at the cat. "Like a fungus."

I laugh a little at the comparison and he glances at me.

"You were able to liberate camp Lux?" I ask because I have nothing else to talk about and I know something more must be resting behind that liberation for Zabini. I look at Blaise and only Blaise because I can't look at Draco.

He nods. "Indeed we did. Fought like savages and reaped the rewards."

"Was your aunt there?" I ask and his smile falters for a second with real emotion. "Is she alright?"

"I came for your brother, Bill," he says, handing Henry off to me as he lifts the cylinder holder wrapped around his chest, ignoring my question. "Have some blue prints. It's all about the rebellion," he says, putting his fist in the air in mock salute. "Hoorah and all that, right?" He flicks a glance to Draco and then he nods his head. "I get it. I'm going."

Then he leaves and Henry follows after him, leaving Draco and I to ourselves.

"They told me you were awake," he says and I spare him a little glance as I go back to my tea cup. "I was going to come earlier..."

"Did something more important detain you?" I ask and my voice sounds terrible. Mean and cold.

I bring the cup to the sink and dump out the remaining tea.

"No," he says flatly. "I thought you would want some time with your family before I came and demanded all of your attention."

_Demanded._

I drop the cup in the sink and it clatters loudly. I know he was trying to make a joke, but it fell flat on my ears. I couldn't stand the thought of that word anywhere near me.

I turn on the water and start to clean the dishes that had gathered throughout the day just so I have something to do with myself.

A long silence falls between us and he walks towards me, his boots clicking against the polished floor. "I can heal you," he whispers as he gets closer to me. "The marks.. on your body..."

"Mom says I have to keep them on for another week or so."

"You've been awake for days. It will be safe for me to heal them..."

"I don't want _you_ to," I end up saying coldly and then I bring my hand up to my forehead.

Why am I being so mean to him when I so easily forgave everyone else?

I can feel him standing right behind me as I wash the dishes and then he reaches a hand out and runs it up my arm.

"Don't touch me," I whisper and he pulls back quickly.

A very long and heavy silence runs between us, the tension so thick in the air it almost suffocates me.

"I'm sorry," I say softly, letting my shoulders sag with the weight of guilt.

I don't want to hurt his feelings. I don't know what I want to do.

"Why..." I stop and turn around so I can face him. He's standing so close that it surprises me and I lean back against the sink.

"Why what?" he asks as he looks over my face.

I try not to be affected by his closeness and I look away, to the picture behind his right shoulder. A barn in the country with chickens in the yard. How very kitsch.

"What is it, Ginny?" he asks softly, gently, deeply, sweetly.

I inhale a shaking breath. I never even wanted to touch the subject with anyone else, but Draco was different. Draco knew the kind of evil the Dark Lord was and he could have matched it.

Draco could have saved me, but he didn't.

"Why..." I bite my lower lip and then start knotting my fingers together. "Why... Why did you leave me with him so long?"

He doesn't say anything to my pathetically delivered question and I bring a hand up to my forehead as I try to make sense of it.

"I know he's the Dark Lord and it would have been hard and everyone else would..." I shake my head and then look him in the eyes. He looks so cut off right now... so cold and emotionless. "But you are always so confident and so sure. Was that part of your plan? To let me rot in that house..."

"Of course not," he says sharply, his eyes narrowing at the thought. "That was never my intention. If you wouldn't have signed that damn contract-"

I push him back so I can get away from him.

I actually wanted to smack him, but after the Dark Lord hit me... I knew that it was wrong to strike another person in anger... no matter how angry you get.

"That's not what I meant," he says as he steps back and then he pinches the bridge of his nose with his finger and thumb. "I meant... I tried to make it so you wouldn't have to sign anything like that. That's why I killed Rookwood so soon. To cut off that tie. I didn't expect the Dark Lord to make you sign it himself."

He inhales deeply and lets his hand drop.

"You didn't try hard enough," I say hatefully and I feel like I just took a knife and stabbed his heart with it by the way he's looking at me.

He walks away from me, back to the kitchen table, and I watch as his fist clenches by his side.

"Do you realize how hard it was for me to know exactly where you were, but not able to get to you? His wards were too great. Only two people were approved to enter... himself and Richard Yaxley on rare occasions," he says, sparing me a sharp look over his shoulder before facing me fully.

I glare.

"Anyone else would literally catch on fire if they passed the trees to that manor. Can you imagine what it was like for me to see the house in the distance, knowing you were inside, but having no way of getting to you... no way of helping you..."

"I can imagine a fate worse," I snap at him with my eyes wet. "Because I was living it. How terrible it must have been for you when I was living with it every day!" I shout at him and he shakes his head.

He grabs the back of a nearby chair, his knuckles white against the wood.

"You could have figured something out, but you didn't," I snap, blaming him for everything in the world. "You could have sent me a message, a note, to let me know I wasn't totally alone. Something to let me know that I wasn't drowning on my own, but you didn't! All that I got from the outside world to let me know someone had me in mind was a cat!"

"A cat?" Draco says with a clueless tilt of his head. "Nothing could go inside of those wards. You don't think we tried!" he shouts at me and I hear the talks in the other room go silent.

We have an audience now and I turn around to face the sink again.

"This is all your fault," I hiss at him unfairly and there's a long pause before he starts talking again, his voice tight and full of anger.

"You hate me then," he says flatly, his voice low. "After all this, you hate me."

"Who am I supposed to hate?" I snap as I look at him again. "The Dark Lord? I already hate him. He's evil, Draco!" I yell and I know the others are listening in rapt attention. "But I don't love him. I loved you and you failed me."

"You're not being fair," he says, his eyes starting to water, but no tears fall.

So very Draco.

"You're never fair," I tell him, my eyes burning with emotion. Unlike Draco, my tears fall down in streams. "I guess I learned that from you." I go back to the dishes, but I stop when the anger makes my hands shake.

I slam down the tea cup and it shatters in the sink.

"You never told me I could say no." I spin around to level him with an accusing glare. "I always believed things were out of my reach... the things that were happening to me just had to happen because I had no way of stopping it." I inhale deeply. "You let me believe I was weak."

He flicks a glance to the door way.

"Let's talk somewhere else," he says. He walks towards me like he's going to take my arm and I back away from him. "Everyone is listening."

"Then let them listen," I say flatly and he clenches his jaw, backing away with his eyes narrowed down at me.

"I never thought you were weak," he says harshly. "I _never_ told you that."

"But you always led me to believe I couldn't control anything. I can. I can control everything in my life and you never wanted me to know that..." I wipe away a stray tear. "Because you wanted to control me, because it benefited your plan."

He doesn't say anything for a moment and then he looks away.

"That's not true, Ginny," he whispers so the others won't hear. "I have loved and protected you the only way I know how." He puts his hand on his neck and he looks out the window. "Now you act like you finally see me for what I truly am and you're disgusted with it."

"And what are you?" I ask flatly and he looks over my face.

"Don't you know already?" he asks sharply and I shake my head. "I don't know what you want me to do," he says softly, his resolve melting as he relaxes his clenched fist. "I have done all that I could..."

"I want you to love me enough... I wanted someone to love me enough," I add for the others listening. "To save me first!"

"What do you think I've been doing this whole fucking time!" he shouts, his anger back and something drops in the other room. "I don't know any way else to be," he says in a soft voice as he glances back at the door. "I don't know what I can say to you."

"Then don't say anything," I snap.

He takes a step closer to me and looks deeply into my eyes. The sun shines in from the window and hits them in just the right way, making them shine like steel.

"After all this time apart, I feel like my feelings for you only burned greater... but I see yours have cooled considerably," he whispers, his voice sounding wounded.

He takes another step closer to me and brings his hand up to rest on my neck. I don't push him away, but I don't give him the benefit of looking into my face anymore. I clench my jaw and turn my head towards the window.

"Look at me," he pleads and I spare him a little glance. "I'm sorry," he says softly before bending down like he was going to brush a kiss against my lips.

The door opens, and he pulls back quickly.

"You two are making quite a ruckus," my Dad says as he hobbles into the room with a wooden crutch under one arm to help him walk. "Let's take a break, shall we?" he smiles as he looks between me and Draco. "Mr. Malfoy, I suspect you have something for me?"

"Yes," Draco steps even further back and pulls an envelope from his pocket. "From my father," he adds as he hands it off to my Dad.

Of course.

I feel the anger pool in my stomach again. He didn't come here to talk to me. He came here for that.

I inhale a sharp breath and Draco looks at me again with his brows furrowed.

"Thank you, Draco," Dad says as he stuffs the letter in his breast pocket. "You should stay for dinner," he says and I shake my head, hoping my father sees it.

He doesn't.

"Come," my father gives us a quick look. "Let's talk in the front room."

Dad walks back out, leaving the door open for Draco to follow. He looks at me once more with his head tilted to the side.

"See," he whispers flatly. "Your father likes me."

I swallow the lump in my throat and watch him leave. When the door closes, I turn back to the sink and put my hands on the counter. I inhale a deep breath and let my head drop until the door opens again.

My Mom and Daphne walk in with matching looks of sympathy and my cheeks burn because I know they were listening.

"Hi," I say flatly as I go to walk out of the room, but Mom stops me, giving me an odd hug that I don't participate in.

When she pulls back, she cups my face in her hands and gives me a sad smile before glancing at Daphne. The surrogate daughter she replaced me with while I was gone.

"Why don't you help us cook?" she offers and I look at her with my eyebrows raised. "It would be fun."

No, it won't.

"I'm making onion soup," Daphne tells me with a grin. "It's world famous."

"I didn't know you cooked," I whisper suspiciously.

The thought of Daphne doing anything in a kitchen is kind of comical.

"I don't really, but your Mom's been teaching me how. I like it," she smiles at me. "Can you imagine...me a cook?"

I feel that unjust bitterness at her words and I clench my jaw. I'm so easily replaceable it's ridiculous.

"I'm going for a walk," I snap as I turn to go out the door.

"Don't go outside the wards!" Mom calls after me as I leave the room.

I grab a pair of shoes, ignoring the eyes that are on me as I go outside. I decide to go the opposite way of the beach. No too far behind the house is a thicket of trees, a small woods of sort, and I take off, trying not to focus on the burning hot rage in my chest.

There are birds chirping above my head as I disappear between the trees and I keep walking until I reach the edge of the wards.

I take seat on a nearby log and stare out ahead of me.

Seeing nothing... hearing nothing... feeling nothing... a thing I used to do at Riddle Manor to pass the time. Become a piece of furniture with no thoughts or feelings. I would prefer to have no thoughts or feelings, actually.

They just get in the way.

I pick up a dried leaf by my foot and I hold it up to get a better look a it. It's dead, brown and crunchy. I narrow my eyes and use wandless magic to lift it in the air in front of my face. I sit further back on the log with my hands supported behind me as I watch it turn in the air.

I lick my lips and then set it on fire.

The flames burn green and I watch as the leaf burns and crumbles into nothingness.

Like me.

"Ginny?"

I panic and my magic dies, making the burning leaf fall to the ground. I get up quickly and stomp out the fire with my foot so I don't inflame the whole forest.

"What?" I snap at Harry even though I know he doesn't deserve it.

"Your mom wanted me to come get you," he says awkwardly and when I finally look at him, he's staring at me with his hands stuffed in the pockets of his worn denim jeans. "Dinner's ready."

"Already?" I snap and he checks his watch.

"You've been out here an hour," he says and I blink a few times.

It didn't seem like an hour.

"Oh," I shake my head and step over the log. "Alright then."

I fall into step beside Harry as we head back towards the cottage. Being this close to him makes me realize how tall he's gotten this past year. He's almost Draco's height now and I look up at him as we walk through the trees.

"What?" he asks as he glances at me. "Is there something on my face?" he asks quickly, bringing a hand up to his face.

"No," I shake my head and stop walking. Harry Potter, the heroes of heroes... "Harry," I lick my lips and he stops walking as well. "If... If I was your girlfriend," I start and his cheeks inflame. "I meant, if you really loved me... Would you have done everything to save me from the Dark Lord?" I ask.

Harry was so good at saving people. Between him and my brother and Hermione it would only take them a couple of days to come up with a good plan. Why hadn't they saved me?

"I would have tried my hardest even if I didn't love you," he says, his face so red it's almost steaming. "We were all trying, Ginny. No one forgot about you," he whispers.

I nod my head, but don't respond.

"What was it like for you?" he asks and I spare him a glance.

"What was what like?" I ask flatly as I glare at some trees like they owed me money.

"To die," he whispers. "I did too, you know. Only for a little bit." I shrug and he runs a hand through his messy hair. "It was like a dream," he admits. "I was on the train platform... only it was bright and white and I talked to Dumbledore."

I narrow my eyes. Even in death Harry gets more attention than me.

"I had a choice to go back or stay..." he trails off and I clench my fists so hard that my nails break the skin of my palm.

"I never had a choice," I bite out harshly before taking off towards the cottage.

Story of my bloody life.

We walk the rest of the way in silence and when we enter the kitchen, the smells of a well cooked dinner fill my senses.

I know it smells good, but there's something that is making my stomach turn.

"Are you alright?" Mom asks with her hand on my arm and I open my eyes, nodding my head.

"Of course," I whisper before taking a seat beside my father. Harry sits down at the empty place to my left.

Everyone filters into the kitchen when the food is placed on the table. We're just a happy little family with Draco Malfoy and Blaise Zabini. The collection is almost comical. Draco takes a seat across from me and I find him in deep discussion with Bill about some kind of Quidditch game that happened years ago.

It warmed my heart to see it, but when he looked to me, I turned away quickly.

I wasn't ready to forgive him.

I wasn't sure I could.

"Harry," I whisper as I turn to the boy who lived.

He just took a drink of milk and some of it was left on his upper lip. So adorable, that Harry Potter.

I make a motion to it, and he blushes before wiping it off quickly. "Oh," he whispers.

"When will Hermione be okay?" I ask him seriously. "She's been at Malfoy Manor for a while now, right?"

"They cursed her pretty badly," he answers in a soft voice as he picks up his fork. "But she'll be okay in a couple of days."

"I should visit her," I say with a frown. "Daphne said that she let herself get caught for me. Is that true?"

He nods his head and goes to explain, but someone cuts him off.

"The place where you were held was too well guarded," my father says and I look at him in surprise. I didn't realize he was dropping in on my conversation. "And you were never let out," he looks at my mother before looking at me. "We needed to do something that would get you away from that house."

"The Dark Lord made it known that he wanted to capture someone from your past," Zabini cuts in after my father hesitates. I give him a look too because I didn't ask him. "I think you know why," he says as he levels me with a look. "He had a point to prove, did he not?"

_Just wait and I will show you_... Tom's words of depression ring through my head. _Take something they care about and they will come running_.

"He was manipulating you, Gin," Draco says gently, but I refuse to look at him.

"I didn't ask you," I snap at him and an odd silence falls over the room.

Like they were all surprised I could be so rude.

I can't help it. He's like Tom. He manipulates me just as much.

"What about that first time?" I ask, looking at Blaise. "When Harry's Aunt and..." I trail off, looking at Harry as he clenches his hand around his fork. What a terrible thing to remember.

"I didn't know you were going to be there," Zabini admits as he looks around the table. "If I had known it would have been different. You weren't let out after that but he started talking about wanting to find someone you knew... someone important to your family."

_I will show you... _

"Hermione volunteered," Harry whispers after a few moments. "He would have killed me... Hermione is very well known in their circle. They could spot her from a mile away," he says as he looks down at his food.

"I didn't..." I trail off feeling stupid with Hermione's screams echoing in my head. "I feel so terrible." I whisper to myself as put my spoon in Daphne's famous onion soup.

"You shouldn't feel bad," My mother says gently. "You've been through enough."

I take a little sip of the soup.

Then I inhale deeply as my stomach turns.

I try again, taking another spoonful of the world famous soup that burns on the way down.

My stomach twists in pain.

I put the spoon down.

"Are you okay?" Daphne asks me from my left as I close my eyes... the smells...

I take a quick drink of milk and then I feel it come back up, so I put my hand over my mouth and swallow it all down.

"Yeah," I croak out as I bring a hand up to my forehead. Why am I sweating? "I'm just not used to so much spice in a my food, I think," I lie as I swallow hard.

I might throw up.

I cover my mouth again when it starts it's upward track.

I swallow it all again, but the feeling isn't going away.

I open my eyes, only to see Draco looking at me with a worried frown on his face.

"I don't..." I inhale again as I go to stand up. Draco stands up too and everyone gives him an awkward look for it that makes him back down. "I don't feel well," I admit.

"It looks like your famous soup is going to make Weasley literally ralph all over the place, Greengrass," Blaise says with a chuckle in his voice as he lifts his glass in her direction. "Bravo."

I can't stay.

I scoot my chair back, making it whine against the floor. I get up and start running.

I make it all the way to the hallway before I start throwing up.

I hate throwing up... it's like dying from the inside out and when Mom comes to help, I cling to her like a child. She smooths back my hair and whispers words of love in my ear before pulling me up and bringing me to my room. She gives me some kind of potion as I lay against the pillows, sweating buckets in the sheets before falling into a fitful sleep.

When I wake up, my hair is french braided again.

I quickly take them out.

I'm not that girl anymore.

* * *

It took me one week to be brave enough to go visit Hermione.

Thinking over my life and what I had lost made me realize that I owed Hermione a lot. I wouldn't be with my remaining family now if she hadn't let herself get caught and I needed to swallow all my bitterness and thank her for it.

We all made sacrifices after all and since my family refused to acknowledge mine, I would acknowledge hers.

I want to bring Henry with me, so I tie a ribbon around his middle and use it like a leash so I don't lose him when I'm there. I stand in front of the fireplace and stare at the grate for a few moments.

I have no idea why I'm so nervous to see her.

It's silly, after all that's happened, but I feel my stomach twisting and turning with fear as I put my hand on the knob.

I had taken my time getting ready this morning, putting on a nice dress and a jean jacket to cover the marks on my shoulders. I even put on a bit of make-up so I didn't look like a child...make-up that Daphne helped me with so I didn't look too over done.

She called it my 'day face'. I wasn't totally sure what that meant, but I rolled with it. I tied my hair back in a bow to keep it out of my face and it took me half an hour until I was satisfied with my appearance.

I was acting like a weird-o.

I shake my head and turn the knob for Malofy Manor.

The grate flames to life and I step into it.

The magnificent front hall of Malfoy Manor is bustling with people running back and forth, holding medical supplies and talking about the camps that the Dark Lord is losing to the Order. No one really notices me as I pull Henry a little tighter against my chest and push my way through the crowd.

All of the splendor and wealth had been stripped from the walls, leaving Draco's amazing ancestral home looking quite bare and cold. I have a feeling it's all stored away somewhere for safe keeping... each painting, silver candle stick... vase... I can see them locked away in a vault for protection.

Much to chagrin of the Dark Lord, I knew that the Malfoy fortune was still intact somewhere. A Death Eater had gone to the pit for it.

I wonder where it is.

After searching around and running into no one that I know, I find rows of white beds lined up in the large ball room. Dozens of men, women, and children are lying down, nursing wounds and curses to their bodies as people in green robes run around them like it was St. Mungo's.

I spot Hermione right away. Her ball of frizzy brown hair is hard to miss and I swallow hard before walking towards her.

I'm wearing a pair of wedge sandals that Ruth Davenport had me buy. Surrounded by all these people with their illnesses, I felt ridiculous so dressed up and I regretted it instantly.

She's asleep as I approach her bed and I press my lips against Henry's head as I walk towards her.

She looks horrid and her skin is so pale it looks like all of the blood had been drained from her body. Even her lips are white and I feel so guilty for all my bitter thoughts as I put Henry down, holding his ribbon leash tightly in my hand as he crawls under her bed.

I take a seat by her cot and look her over with my eyes starting to water.

I hate war.

After a few moments, her eyes start to flutter and she blinks a few times before focusing on me.

"Ginny?" she whisper, her voice rough and low.

I nod my head. "Hi," I say like an idiot.

Neither of us say anything for a while as her eyes start to droop shut.

"I'm sorry," she mumbles. "I have so many potions in my system right now."

"I..." I trail off and then cough to catch my balance. "They told me what happened," I say as I reach out to take her hand. It was the first time I initiated contact with anyone since I've been back. "They said that you let yourself get caught."

"You shouldn't have been with him that long," she says in a soft voice. "It was the only way."

"I..." I fumble with my words as I stare at her little frame. She looks so much thinner than I remember and she looks so ill. "Thank you," I tell her, swallowing hard and she gives me a little smile.

"You look well," she says as she tries to push herself up, only to fail miserably. I get up to help her, but she stops me. "It's alright. I'll just lay."

I nod my head and sit back down.

"What did they do to you?" I ask, staring at her from the corner of my eyes, guilt thick in my stomach.

"It doesn't matter," she says as she closes her eyes. "Things heal eventually."

Right.

"You're brave, Hermione," I whisper because it was true.

"I saw what you did at Folk Hills," she says after a few moments. "I think you just might be the bravest person I know... and I know Harry Potter."

I laugh a little before frowning. "I'm not brave at all," I whisper and she glances at me before closing her eyes again.

"That's not true," she says with her words slurred.

Then she falls asleep again and I wait a few moments before looking around the room.

There's blood, missing limbs, people screaming and crying.

I can't take it anymore. I take Henry and his homemade leash and practically run outside. I hate war and death and all things associated with it. After this is all over, I never want to see another battle. I never want to be around wars or curses or liars or Lords.

I just want to be normal.

I'm such a selfish idiot.

I speed walk until I reach the edge of the large grounds, with the ward fence just a few yards ahead of me.

Once away from all the people inside, I can finally breathe. I let out a breath that sounds like a sob stuck in my throat.

"You're blocking the sun."

I snap my neck around when I hear that voice and I drop Henry. Blaise is lying in the grass just beside me with his legs crossed and his arms behind his head.

"Get out of the way," he says with a smirk playing on his lips.

He's wearing sunglasses, so I can't make out his eyes, but I'm sure the mirth reaches them.

"Sorry," I mumble as I pick up Henry's leash before I realize I shouldn't be apologizing to him when I'm the one trying to run away. "What are you doing out here?"

"What are _you _doing out here?" he counters as he gets up on his elbows, letting his glasses fall down so that the sun shines into those golden eyes of his. He looks at Henry and a little laugh leaves his mouth. "Do you have my cat on a leash, Weasley?"

"I don't want him to run away," I admit in defense as Henry hops on Zabini's chest to rub up against him.

He laughs.

He laughs and he laughs and he laughs.

He actually laughs so hard that he takes off his sunglasses to pinch the bridge of his nose like it was all to much for him.

"I know, real funny," I say as I pick up Henry to protect me. I resist kicking his side as he sits up and holds his stomach "Keep laughing."

"I'm sorry," he says as he wipes his eyes and puts his sunglasses to the top of his head, pulling dark curls away from his face. "It's just that you have a cat on a leash." He laughs again. "It's just so funny."

I don't say anything, I just give him a sour look as he laughs at me.

"Why don't you take a seat?" he says, patting the spot beside him. "Keep me company."

"I don't want to sit with you," I tell him flatly as I put Henry down and tug him along with my ribbon. "You're mean."

He laughs again."I am mean," he says with a head nod. "One has to wonder how I hold any friendships."

"One _does _wonder," I say grumpily and he smirks.

"Come on," he says, patting the grass again. "Let's hide away from the war together."

I hesitate a moment as Zabini looks up at me, his eyes squinted against the sun shining from behind me. He did let me have Henry... he did tell me I could say no. There was more to Blaise Zabini than the irritating boy I always thought he was.

I lick my lips before taking the offered seat by his side and I let Henry roam around as he lays back on his elbows again.

A silence falls between us and I spare him little glances as I try to figure out the riddle that is Blaise Zabini.

"Have you noticed," he says as he nods to a tree nearby. "That one looks like a vagina."

Okay, maybe there's really not so much to him.

He laughs at the way my lip turns up in a sneer and he pushes my arm. "It's true, look at it."

"You're gross," I snap at him as I cross my arms, thinking that I was an idiot for sitting with him.

"That might be true," he laughs and I send a glance to the tree in question. I can kind of see what he's saying, but I wouldn't dare give him the pleasure of knowing that. "Why do you look so disgusted?" he asks with a grin.

"I hate that word," I say honestly.

There is nothing pretty about the V word and it makes me feel dirty just thinking about it.

"What word?" he asks ruefully and when I glare at him, he laughs again. "Why?" he questions with a brow raised. "Would you rather me say cunt?"

I cringe. "God, stop it," I say in disgust and he laughs.

"You're in possession of one, are you not?" he asks and my cheeks heat. "Why be so disgusted with something you own?"

I don't want him thinking about what's under my knickers... or what my private spot might look like.

His voice drops to a lower tone when he speaks again and it makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. "I bet you taste like honey," he says in a quiet voice, barely above a whisper as his hand comes up to finger the ribbon in my hair. "You're so sweet."

I push his hand away.

"I'm hardly sweet," I counter because the implication of what he just said is making me very uncomfortable.

He snorts. "Perhaps with a side dish of bitchy to help it go down," he says and I narrow my eyes before I let them soften...

Then the corner of my mouth starts to turn up in a smile as Zabini watches the progression across my face.

"Why are you smiling?" he asks curiously with his head tilted. "Haven't I offended you to the point where you need to go stomping off in the distance like a spoiled child?"

I shake my head with a laugh dancing on my tongue and I turn back to the trees.

"Everyone has been handling me with safety gloves," I admit to him as I draw my knees up to my chest. "It's kind of nice to know that you've remained stubbornly bastardish."

"Bastardish?" he says with his lips pursed. "I'm not even sure that's a word."

"It's not," I tell him flatly as I pluck a clover from the yard. "I made it up just for you."

"Aren't you kind," he replies as he sits up so he's even with me. "You might of forgotten that I once saw you spit on the Great Dark Lord," he says and my face falls when I remember the incident. It was right before the jerk of a man smacked my face. "I'm pretty sure a girl with that much gumption can handle herself pretty well."

"One would think so," I whisper.

"One _knows_ so," he counters and when I look at him, he smiles again.

"I came here to see Hermione," I say as the hot sun beats down on us. It makes the jean jacket I'm wearing itch, but I won't take it off. The marks on my skin are red and ugly. "It was horrible."

"Don't think about it then," he says with a shrug.

I shake my head, but don't say anything to that. Perhaps he's right.

He licks his lips as he looks over my face before facing forward.

"You know," he says as he dusts something off of his jeans. "Malfoy is inside right now."

He nods back to the Manor and I look at it over my shoulder... the big menacing mansion on a hill.

I don't respond and he pulls out a small metal case from his pocket. I watch as he clicks it open, revealing his cigarettes all lined in a row. I roll my eyes as he pulls one out and lights it with the end of his wand before handing it to me.

"I don't smoke," I tell him, trying to refuse the cigarette but he pushes it on me until I'm forced to hold it.

"You do today," he says before pulling out another for himself.

As with everything else in my life, I'm awkward. so I watch what Blaise is doing as I bring it up to my lips. I cough when I inhale a whole lung full and practically spit out the smoke on the exhale as Zabini rubs my back in an all too close for comfort way.

I push his hand off of me and scoot away.

"You'll get used to it," he says with his smoke dangling from the corner of his lips as he speaks.

Once I master the whole smoking thing, I flick my ashes on the ground as I watch Henry play in the grass. Of course, I start thinking about Draco, because I always think about Draco and I watch Zabini as he runs a hand through his dark hair.

"Have you ever been in love before?" I ask him because... I guess I don't know why I asked.

Half of me wants to run inside and jump on Draco... kiss him and hold him and love him... Have him comfort me because things are so bad... Talk to him about Hemione...About my brothers who are dead and the war that's being fought... But another part of me can't even stand the thought of being the same room as him.

"I love myself a great deal," he says as he puts his hand on his navy v neck.

"You know what I mean," I mumble as I snuff the cigarette out on the near by rock.

I'm not much of a fan.

"I find that love makes fools of us all," he says with a sigh as he goes back to resting on his elbows. "And I hate being made a fool of."

"Don't you love Pansy?" I ask, remembering their tumultuous relationship over the past year and how it had affected Parkinson.

"No," he says with no hesitation and I give him a troubled look because... Because I know how Pansy feels about him.

"Then why do you lead her on?" I ask softly as I hug my knees to my chest, staring at his profile like my life depended on it.

"Because she loves me," he says plainly with a half shrug on his shoulders. "And that makes me feel good. It's kind of intoxicating, you know... When someone keeps coming back after you treat them like shit."

I make a face. "That is horrible."

"I never said I was a nice guy," he counters quickly as he tilts his head.

"You're not," I say flatly and he laughs as I pick a blade of grass.

Another silence falls between us. I start thinking of my relationship with Draco and how he's treated me. Lying, keeping things from me...

"Do you think Draco thinks that way about me?" I ask in a half whisper but he hears it.

He shakes his head and tosses his lit cigarette in a patch of weeds in front of us.

"You want to know what I think?" he asks and I nod my head."I think Malfoy is inside right now planning a war that he never intended on fighting with people he never intended on helping," he says seriously. "For a girl who refuses to fucking talk to him."

I glance at him because he sounds so... so unlike himself that it makes me pause.

"I think you've been viewing this whole year from the wrong angle," he adds. "Don't get me wrong... Malfoy is a terrible person. He's lied... cheated... killed people..."

It sounds terrible when said out loud and I nearly cringe at the thought.

"He's manipulated your feelings so you would do as he wanted and he's trapped us all in this stupid fight that none of us give a flying fuck about," he inhales deeply.

I turn my body to his so I'm facing him full on.

"He's fucking mean and a domineering bastard, but you knew all of that when you decided to fall in love with him, so you can't claim ignorance on that now. You knew he was an arrogant son a bitch when you started dating him."

"What's you're point?" I snap harshly, burned by his words.

"I wasn't lying to you when I said that you should be grateful that he's so nice to you.," he says as he leans up and moves closer to me so his face is right by mine. "His kindness to you is not an act. He just treats you better than he treats everyone else. It was kind of refreshing, actually, to see him not glare at someone all the time."

I stare at him as he brings his hand up to my hair like he was going to touch it before quickly letting it fall.

"I know he's had his fair share of sharp words with you, but you can trust me when I say that your fights have been tame. I've seen..." he trails off and shakes his head like he was remembering something unbelievable, but he doesn't elaborate further. "Don't get me wrong," he adds, sparing me a little glance and smirk. "I'm all for stealing you away from him," he says and my cheeks heat in embarrassment. "I'm a very experienced lover... I think it would blow your mind."

How dare he even...

"It's one of my greatest talents... taking things from Malfoy, but I would rather it not be just because you're being vengeful towards him."

"I don't want you," I tell him hotly and he laughs.

"Sure you don't," he says sarcastically with an eye roll. "I've seen you looking at me, you know," he says as he runs his thumb over his lower lip as he stares at me. "You think I'm sexy."

"You are just a pompous... arrogant... narcissistic..."

He makes a twirling motion with his fingers as I stutter out the insults. "You have a wonderful vocabulary," he cuts me off.

I make an angry noise and turn my head away.

"The Dark Lord only wanted you for your curse breaking blood," he says and I glance at him over my shoulder with an angry glare. "He only made a Horcrux for you so your body would live as long as he did. With out your original body, you would have been worthless to him."

I open my mouth to respond, but he cuts me off.

"When Malfoy found out about your blood, he could have killed you," he says seriously. "He could have gotten rid of your body with your precious blood and the Dark Lord would be the weak thing that he came back as originally. You know he has no problem with murder," he says in a dark voice and it sends a chill down my spine. "He could have done that and made it look like an accident. It would have been more beneficial to his plan to kill you, but he didn't. He could have. But he didn't."

He looks me over, his eyes searching my face.

"Why don't you think on that for a while, Ginny," he almost whispers and I feel my anger spike. "How he spent most of his time keeping you alive when all had to do was off you and be done."

"So what?" I hiss as I turn to face him fully. "I should be grateful that he didn't_ murder _me when he had a chance?"

"I'm not saying you should be grateful or not," he says sharply. "I just want you to realize that he had two roads in front of him and he didn't chose the easy one. His very careful plans and ideas have been rerouted multiple times to accommodate you. Draco wasn't the only one who knew about your blood and wanted the Dark Lord gone," he says seriously. "There were others who could have done it but you're here now because Draco _wanted_ to keep you."

I shake my head.

"It's a terrible thing," he says as he looks me in the eyes. "To be loved by a person like him."

"It's a terrible thing to be loved by anyone," I snap shortly and he gives me a look as I stand up. "It just ends up hurting."

"Indeed it does," he says flatly.

"How do you even know?" I spit at him and he stands up as well. "You don't love anyone but yourself."

"And I am the worst person to love, aren't I?"

"You know what," I tell him as I point my finger right at his chest. "You are frustrating. I don't know why anyone likes you. You never have a point to anything you say!"

"Don't point your finger at me, ginger," he says and I sneer at the name. "I have points, you're just too dense to realize it."

"Shut up."

"Oh, now you sound like Malfoy," he smirks at my glare. "My point, for this conversation is..." he pauses for a second I suppose for dramatic affect as he looks into my eyes. "Draco Malfoy cares nothing of mudbloods or muggles or halfbreeds, but he's putting all of _our _lives in danger to save them from the very people he agrees with."

His voice sounds bitter and angry as he glares at me.

"I nearly died yesterday trying to save a few fucking muggles from a burning building. Fucking Muggles," he sneers at the thought. "Just because Draco fucking Malfoy wants your family to like him."

I look down.

"So, miss Ginevra Weasley," he says, leaning forward to tug on my hair until I look at him again. "Who really is the fool in this equation?"

It was a good question and I found myself doubting the answer.

* * *

I've been hanging out with Zabini a lot more than I should.

It's hard to explain. He doesn't treat me very well, but I actually prefer the way he treats me over everyone's fake niceness. Isn't that odd? It's like nothing has changed between us from when I first met him and I kind of like that.

It's kind of refreshing.

After the cottage falls asleep, I sneak out of my bedroom and use the floo line to go to Yellow Springs where Zabini stays. I sneak pass other bedrooms to reach him. We play chess, sometimes we drink... sometimes we just talk. Just because I like talking to him doesn't mean I don't want anyone else knowing I like talking to him too. I don't speak about our nighttime chats to anyone, not even Daphne.

I like Blaise. I never knew that was possible.

He tells me things about the war and about the Death Eaters with out talking down to me like I was a child. He keeps me in the loop without sugar coating the horrors of war and I appreciate that. I'm not a stupid little girl anymore. I can handle information better than most after what I've seen and I think Zabini knows that.

I was grateful that Blaise gave me Henry and when I told him that, he just shrugged. He said that Henry liked me better than him so it wasn't so far of a stretch. When I asked how he was able to do it with out being found out... his expression got dark.

The Dark Lord killed Franklin after the elf let Henry into the house. Blaise was upset about that and he ranted about it for hours. How he had to bribe Franklin with a photo of his aunt to even get the elf to do as he said... How Faun ratted Franklin out when the Dark Lord questioned her... How Zabini cut off her head for disloyalty after the Dark Lord's men took Franklin's.

It was a bloody business, but I was thankful for Blaise's personality. He didn't linger too long on dark thoughts and he could easily turn anything into a joke.

He makes me smile a lot.

He doesn't try to kiss me or anything, which is nice, but he doesn't exactly hide his affection either.

Yesterday I had to push him away when he went to hold my hand.

I feel like I'm playing with fire, but I guess a part of me is used to that.

Oh well.

He's awake when I slide into his room and I smile when I see him. He's sitting by his open window, smoking a cigarette and blowing the smoke outside.

"Queen Ginny," he greets me as I shut the door behind me.

"Don't call me that," I tell him as I walk forward to take a seat on his bed.

"Then what should I call you?" he asks with a brow raised as he throws the cigarette out the window. "I can't exactly call you pleasant, now can I?"

I snort in laughter as he takes a seat on the opposite side of the bed.

When he gets close enough, I can see the cut on his lip. It's angry and red and I frown when I see it.

"What happened?" I ask seriously as I get up to get a closer look. "I didn't think you've been on any missions recently."

"I haven't," he says with a shrug as I walk around the bed.

There's also a bruise forming on his cheekbone and lower jaw.

"Who did you get in a fight with?" I ask and he smirks.

"I would like you to think long and hard about that one," he says and it takes me all of two seconds to think of Draco. "You think he appreciates you coming into my room at night?"

"How does he know?" I ask like a child getting caught doing something wrong.

"How could he not know?" Zabini counters and I frown.

"He shouldn't hit you," I snap hatefully with my arms cross, my anger at Draco coming back ten fold. "When did this happen?" I ask.

"Yesterday."

"Why didn't you heal yourself?" I ask, knowing he's good with those kinds of spells.

He just shrugs.

"You know, one would think you were trying to be vindictive. You pass his room each night to get to mine," he says and I didn't actually know that so I furrow my brows. "If I didn't know any better, I would think you were trying to hurt him. You know the issues he has."

"I didn't know he stayed here," I say flatly.

To be honest, I thought my time with Zabini was a secret.

"First door on the right at the top of the stairs," he says and I frown when I think of the light that is always on when I creep by at night. "He _knows_ every time you come here, Ginny," he says with a little smirk. "He was bound to try to kick my ass at some point in time."

I shake my head. "Did you fight back?" I ask, wondering if Draco has matching wounds.

The thought of him nursing them by himself makes me feel worse.

He laughs and rubs one of his eyes with the heel of his palm.

"I'm fighting back right now," he says, giving me a smile as he reaches out to take my hand.

I let him and only pull away when he brings his hand up to place a kiss against my knuckles. "Don't do that," I whisper as I move away from him.

"Fair enough," he sighs loudly. "How about something to drink?" he says. "Let's get drunk and talk badly about people," he smiles and I nod my head.

Getting drunk always helps.

He pulls a bottle of whiskey from under his bed and two glasses come soon after. "This is strong," he says as he pours me a glass and hands it to me. "Drink with caution."

Fuck caution.

I take a large gulp and nearly choke on the taste, but I keep it down as I sit on his bed. He pulls up his desk chair to sit right across from me.

"Let's play truth or dare," he says and I roll my eyes as I take another painful drink.

"That's a stupid game."

"Truth or dare," he asks and I eye him for a moment with the glass against my lips before sighing.

"Truth."

"What's your favorite sex position?" he asks and I laugh at how ridiculous he is.

Thinking of sex makes me think of Draco... I lick my lips and shake my head. "Pass."

"You can't pass," he says seriously.

"Fine," I whisper as I take another drink. "I don't know," I say honestly because I've liked everything I've done with Draco... Zabini gives me a look. "I guess... I guess if I had to chose I like it when the guy's on top best. I like the closeness," I admit with a red face and Zabini snorts.

"Missionary?" he rolls his eyes. "Just when I thought you couldn't get anymore boring."

"Fine. What's yours?" I snap at him, finishing the glass.

He readily pours me another one.

"I like fucking a girl standing up from behind," he says and my cheeks turn so red at his blunt delivery that he starts laughing. "That was your turn. Now, truth or dare?"

"Truth," I say and he leans back, taking another sip from his glass.

"Alright, do you spit or swallow?"

"Blaise!" I hiss and he smirks.

"Well?"

"I'm not telling you that," I snap, and he gives me a wide smile.

"Then you have to do a dare."

"Keep it clean," I tell him flatly as I take another drink.

The whiskey is strong and I'm already feeling light headed.

"Alright," he says as he runs his hand over his mouth. "Sing the Hogwarts school song," he says with a smirk. Easy enough. "While gurgling your drink."

That I could do.

I take a drink of the horrible tasting whiskey and keep it in my throat as I start singing the song. He laughs at my attempts and half way though the song, I give up and swallow the whiskey with some of it dribbling out of the corner of my mouth.

"I see you swallow," he says and I laugh as I throw a pillow at his chest.

"You're horrid," I tell him with a drunk smile as I wipe off the side of my face. Officially gone with the alcohol. "Truth or dare," I ask him with a laugh, my cheeks hot from the embarrassing dare.

"Truth," he says as he eyes me.

"Do you like anyone?" I ask, thinking of Pansy and he rolls his eyes.

"That's a stupid question."

"I meant, do you have a crush on anyone," I say quickly and he runs his finger over the rim of his glass as he looks right at me.

"Yes," he says seriously and I smile.

"Who?"

"That's two questions," he laughs at my sour face as he takes a drink. "Truth or dare?"

"Truth," I say as I take another sip.

"Do you like the way I look?" he asks as he raises his brows and looks me over.

"You know you're good looking," I tell him with a head shake, thinking he's silly.

"But do _you_ like the way I look?" he asks and I spare him a glance before looking down at my drink.

"Yes," I say softly and I can feel his smile. "Truth or dare," I say quickly so he'll stop gloating.

"Truth."

"Do you like the way I look?" I counter, wanting him to be uncomfortable too.

"Very much so," he says in a very deep voice and when I look at him, he's not smiling at all.

He looks all together serious as he stares at me and I look away to get away from it.

"Dare," I say so I don't have to admit any other embarrassing truths.

"Sit on my lap."

"W-What?" I whisper as I snap my face towards his, my drunk mind slow on the intake.

He leans back in his chair and then pats his thigh.

"I... I can't do that," I stutter as I think of Draco.

"Why not?" he asks with a dark brow raised. "Are you afraid of me?"

"I'm not afraid of you," I scoff.

"Then sit on my lap," he says as he stares me down.

I feel like he's challenging and because I'm drunk a little bit out of my own mind, I stand up and walk towards him. He smiles to himself as I smooth out my skirt and sit down sideways on his lap, trying hard not to lean against him and touch his chest, or anything else, for that matter.

"Look at you, being brave," he jokes and I spare him a little look as I take another drink from my glass. "Alright then, my turn. Truth."

I go to stand up to go back to the bed, but he puts his arm on my thigh.

"What are you doing?" he asks with a brow raised, his mouth by my ear. He smells spicier than Draco...

"The dare is over. It's your turn," I explain to him like he was a simpleton, trying not to be affected by his closeness.

"Haven't you ever played this game?" he asks and I frown. "You have to stay until the end of the game."

"No..." I shake my head but then he is warm... and he does smell good. I take another drink and shrug my shoulder, relaxing on his lap again.

Who cares?

"Fine. What do you pick?"

"Truth," he says as he sits back again, taking a drink from his glass as he studies my profile.

"Have you talked to your mother since Christmas?" I ask and he shakes his head.

"I've written to her," he admits as he looks away with his lips against the glass. "But she hasn't written back. Truth or dare."

"Dare," I whisper because I hate his questions and he looks at me closely.

"Finish your drink," he says and I gulp it all down, feeling the world spin as he pours me another. "Truth," he says as I blink a few times, trying to keep the world in focus.

"Was your aunt at camp Lux?" I ask stupidly, but my drunk mind isn't holding back.

"Yes," he says and I nod my head, feeling my mind get blurry.

"Is she dead?" I whisper and he looks me over.

"Yes," he says and when I give him a troubled look, he smiles. "When they found out we were coming, they locked them in their cabins and started executing them," he explains as I lick my lips. "Guess who was in cabin number one."

I feel my heart clench. "I'm... I'm so sorry," I tell him honestly. "That is awful."

He shrugs. "War is awful. Now, that was two questions... so you have to do two.. Truth or dare."

"Dare."

"Finish your drink."

"Didn't you just say that?" I ask as I gulp down the burning liquid in my glass. When it's finished, Blaise is right there to pour me another one and I shift on his lap to get closer so I don't fall off.

"Again," he says as I down the drink like a shot.

It makes the world turn in front of my eyes and I pause a second to collect myself before turning to him.

"Truth or Dare?"

"Truth," he says again and I lick my lips as I try to sort through my thoughts that are all leaping and fumbling around each other in a slurred mess.

I start thinking of him and the things he says to me that are so confusing. "Why do you say things I don't understand?" I ask with a frown and he shakes his head.

"I don't know the answer to that question."

"Yes," I snap, glaring at him with a pout. "You do."

"Maybe it's because you pout so prettily," he says with a smirk and I shake my head as I take another drink.

"Dare again," I mumble into my drink and there's a pause before he speaks.

"Take off your shirt," he says as he looks at my chest.

I shake my head.

"It's a dare, Ginny," he whispers. "You have to do it."

I take another drink as the world starts to spin again.

"I can't do that," I whisper. "Draco wouldn't like it."

"Is he here?" Blaise asks sharply and I shake my head.

"Blaise," I lick my lips as I give up trying to fight it and I lean against his chest with my lips close to his face. "I have a tank top on under my shirt," I tell him and he raises his brows. "You won't see my bra if that's what you wanted."

"Then it shouldn't be so hard for you to take this off," he says, tugging on the red blouse I'm wearing.

I shake my head.

"I have..." I frown as I try to find the words. "I have those cuts on my chest and shoulders," I tell him as I touch my collar bone. "You'd be able to see them if I... if I take this off," I mutter off self-consciously and he puts some hair over my shoulder.

"You say that like I didn't know."

I nod my head and have him hold my drink as I pull the blouse over my head, leaving me in the black tank top with thin straps.

"Look at you," he says as he brings his hand up and runs his fingers along one of the cuts on my chest. "You look like a warrior princess."

I smile at him.

"Dare," he says after a few moments and I think for a second before repeating his dare because I'm getting too drunk to form real thoughts.

"Take off your shirt."

He laughs. I sit foreword and hold his glass as he tugs the black polo over his head. He doesn't have a tank top underneath like me and I stare at his bare chest when it becomes visible to me.

"You're really warm," I tell him as I put a shy hand out to touch his shoulder.

I watch my hand as it runs over his skin. I haven't been this close to someone in such a long time and I didn't realize until this moment that I was longing for human interaction. I was drunk enough not to shy away from it, and I was drunk enough not to think of the Dark Lord... or Draco...

"Truth or dare?" he asks in a soft voice as my hand slides down to his chest.

"Dare," I say, not even realizing what I had chosen.

He brings his hand up and tilts my face towards his. Blaise Zabini, all dark and beautiful with those amazing amber eyes.

"Kiss me."

"What?" I whisper, knowing that it would be wrong. "No," I shake my head and go to get up. "I shouldn't..."

He doesn't answer, he just leans forward and presses his lips to mine with his hand holding down my leg.

I freeze when he drops his glass and brings his hand up to rest in my hair. I clench my eyes shut when he deepens the kiss and I can't do anything but just sit there for a few shocked moments. Much to his pleasure, because he tangles his hand more tightly into my hair and starts devouring my face with a vengeance. He tastes like whiskey and cigarettes and it feels odd against my drunk lips.

He doesn't taste like Draco.

I shouldn't be doing this. I don't _want_ to do this.

I hate the way he's holding my leg down. I hate the way that he's trying to get me to kiss him back.

I try to pull back, but he keeps his hand firmly in my hair and his mouth against mine.

I can't stand it.

I grab his hair and try to pull him back roughly, but it seems to have the opposite affect because he makes an odd growling noise in the back of his throat... pulling my body against him more firmly.

"Blaise," I snap when I finally turn my head far enough away to break the kiss.

It doesn't stop him, his harsh kisses start to move down my jaw and I bring my hand up to his neck, using my nails to pinch as hard as I can.

"What the fuck," he snaps as I push him back.

I stand up quickly and glare at him with my eyes embarrassingly wet. "Don't do that," I hiss at him as I wipe off my mouth.

"What?" he snaps at me.

"Don't do that again," I snap at him as I pick up my blouse.

I practically run out of the room and when I pass by the balcony, I go outside to catch some air before I go back to the stuffy cottage where my family lives.

I realize now that I brought the glass of whiskey with me. I make a face at it before placing it on the railing and glaring at it like it was it's fault I had allowed that terrible thing to happen.

I inhale a deep breath, trying to let the summer night air sober me up as I replay what just happened. Why did I let him kiss me? I'm so stupid. I put my hand against my head and inhale another deep breath. A couple moments later, I hear someone step onto the balcony behind me.

Thinking it's Blaise, I ignore him and cross my arms over my chest as I close my eyes.

"Why do you seek out his company and not mine?"

That's Draco's deep voice and it shocks me into action. I turn around quickly and see him standing in the doorway with his hands in the pockets of his gray slacks. He takes one look at me before glancing at the blouse in my hands. I feel naked before him and I hold the blouse up to my chest.

"What?" I whisper, my heart hammering a mile a minute like he just caught me doing something horrible.

That's not far from the truth. It would kill Draco to know I was kissing Blaise... or sitting on his lap.

"Why do you talk to him when you completely ignore my existence?" He rewords his question and I turn away quickly as I put that blouse back on so he can't see the cuts he inflicted on me.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I lie as I tug on the hem of the blouse, trying to set it into place.

"Don't play that fucking game with me," he snaps and I give him another shocked look because of the venom in his voice. He walks towards me, his shoes tapping against the concrete. "I know you come here at night. I know you go to his room."

"I'm not having sex with him..." I whisper, wanting to... I don't know... reassure him?

"I didn't say you were," he cuts me off sharply and I bite my tongue as I look away. "But that's not to say that my old friend hasn't been trying his fucking hardest to get you into bed. Has he been successful," he asks, looking down at my damning red blouse. "You want him now, don't you?"

"Stop it, Draco," I whisper pathetically as I cross my arms uncomfortably.

"I almost wish you were fucking him. It would be better than the relationship you seem to be building with him."

I don't say anything to that. I can't.

He takes a step closer as he looks me over and then he narrows his eyes even more. "Are you drunk?" he scolds and I turn away, trying to fix my messy hair. He sees the glass of whiskey... He picks it up and sniffs it and then his faces goes dark. "Have you been _drinking _with him? You smell like fucking whiskey."

"My head hurts. Stop yelling at me," I snap at him as I bring me hand up to my forehead.

He _throws_ the glass down and it shatters against the concrete floor.

I jump back and cover my mouth at the violence.

"Could you just explain it to me, Ginny?" he says with his jaw clenched in anger as he steps through the glass, his boot crushing some pieces to dust. "I can understand you hanging out with your brothers, or even Harry Potter. But why Zabini. Why him?"

I stare at him with wide eyed shock and then I look at the glass shattered on the ground.

Why did I like hanging out with Zabini?

"He's funny," I say after a lifetime if horrible silence. "He makes me laugh," I say and a painful look slips across his face before it turns cold once more. "He was the only person I saw when I was... was there... and he's just... he's funny."

"Can I not make you smile?" he asks flatly.

I look at the shattered glass once again and then my eyes flick to his clenched fists.

"You remind me of him," I say gently. "Of Tom... Voldemort," I correct myself as he stands straight. "It's hard for me... You and him are so much alike... it's hard for me to be around you because it reminds me of him," I try to explain my thoughts, trying not to sound too much like a rambling drunk person.

"I am not like him, Ginny," he says softly, looking deeply into my eyes.

"But you are. You don't see it," I explain as I turn away and rub my forehead.

How do you explain to someone that they remind you of a genocidal maniac who tortured you? How do I do that without hurting him?

"I would never do what he has done. I am not a tyrant, Ginny. I am nothing like him."

_But you are, though._

"Okay," I whisper because I don't.. can't... explain myself to him.

"Do you like Zabini?" he asks, looking away and clenching his fist again. "Do you love him more than me?"

_I will kill anyone I think you love more than me. _

"Will you kill him?" I ask a little more sharply than I wanted when I remembered that line and he glances at me.

"I want to," he says as he turns away to look out at the grounds."I know you've been kissing him."

"What?" I say in surprise, making my cheeks hot.

He shakes his head and then smacks his hand against the railing. I jump. "I knew it."

"What are you talking about?"

"I can tell. Your lips are all red and when I just said that you didn't fucking say no." He puts his hand in his hair and inhales deeply. "Why would you do that?" he asks fiercely.

"It just kind of happened. I was drinking and we were playing a game." I realize how terrible it sounds. I still love Draco and even though I've been terrible to him recently, that was no excuse for what happened. "I'm sorry. I stopped it...I didn't want it...it was just a drunk stupid... thing."

He shakes his head.

"Why are you sorry?" he asks sharply. "It's not like it matters to you, does it? You hate me, remember?"

"I don't hate you," I whisper, my eyes red.

"You must hate me, or your wouldn't continuously hurt me as much as you have been."

"I'm sorry," I snap back, this time it's meanly. "I didn't realize you were the only one allowed to have hurt feelings."

"No," he snaps, approaching me with quick steps. "You do not get to use that as a reason for this!"

I turn away and look over the grounds.

I want to go to bed.

"I am trying to be something I'm not," he says. "I don't know why. You can do what you want. I won't stop you as long as it's what you want. But you better be sure, Ginny. You better be fucking sure because I'm not going to go through all of this if you don't fucking know."

I don't say anything to that.

"But just..." he exhales slowly and clenches his hands around the railing. "Zabini isn't any better than I am. He's worse in some ways," he says, but he doesn't elaborate and I don't question it. "Don't go for him. Don't be with him. If you hold any affection for me what so ever, you will not go to him."

"I don't want to be with him," I whisper honestly. "After what's happened, I don't know if I want to do be with anyone," I say and I feel like I just took a knife and stuck it right in his heart.

Draco's eyes were red, but he doesn't cry. Draco never cries. Instead he narrows his eyes and nods his head stiffly.

"Right," he says sharply. "I get it."

I don't think he does.

"Draco..."

"No," he holds out his hand as he starts walking back towards the house. "Spare me."

"Wait," I say as I turn to stop him.

"I don't think so," he says sharply and I cross my arms. "I'm not going to listen to you ramble your way through this. I'm too tired to fucking deal with you."

I'm trying to explain myself to him. I'm trying to word this right...

"Stop being so mean," I tell him gently and he turns around with his hands in his hair.

"I'm not being mean!" he shouts and I jump. "I can't be anyway else," he says in frustration. "I'm not like Harry Potter. I am not like the men in your family."

He runs his hands over his face as he tries to calm himself down.

"I am not sweet. I am not kind. I can't.." he stops himself, his voice emotional. "I can't be the person you're supposed to be with."

"Supposed to be with?" I whisper in surprise and he inhales a deep breath.

"I do not have noble thoughts. My motives for everything are selfish and indulgent. Maybe you're right," he whispers. "Maybe I am like the Dark Lord."

He inhales deeply before continuing, giving me a venomous glare that pierces my heart.

"I am jealous of everyone you look at and everything you touch. I want to murder the people who hurt you... and the ones who make you smile more than I do. I want to pull you into a room and show you how much I have missed you even though I know you won't let me. I want to claim what I think is mine because that's how I am and no matter how many times I'm told that's wrong, I can't fucking help it."

I look away.

"I wasn't lying when I said the stupidest thing I've ever done was fall in love with you." That hurt and I make a face. "My thoughts are obsessive. They always have been, but you are the main object of my desires and I feel like I'm going mad sometimes."

He takes a step closer to me.

"Before I started seeing you, I knew exactly what I was doing and where I was going. Now I've had to change my plans in a million different ways to accommodate this feeling," he puts his hand on his chest. "That I have for you."

I can't say anything.

"And now I'm playing a fucking rebel just to keep your goddamn family alive so you won't cry. I am exhausted. I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't be doing this," he snaps as he throws up his hands. "This is not how this is supposed to happen."

I look at him as he pulls on his hair.

"I don't fucking care about mudbloods or muggles," he says and I flinch at the derogatory word. "But I care about you. That's the only reason why I'm doing any of this. For you, because you are the only one who makes me a halfway decent person."

"Don't you have your own moral compass?" I ask because I can't believe that. I can't believe I'm the only reason he's good because I'm not good at all.

"You," he says flatly with no warmth in his eyes. "You are the only person who makes me think twice." He walks towards me and reaches out like he wants to touch me before deciding against it. "You are perfect," he says.

_He wants the world to be perfect as it should be_... Millicent had told me that and I still have no idea what it means.

"You are perfect for me and the life I want to live," he admits firmly. "But my life will not be perfect without you in it. Not anymore. It makes my thoughts go dark to think you do not love me. I am not a good man, Ginny. I have done many terrible things in my pursuit of power but you are my one road block that I've allowed to change the course of my well thought out life. You have to love me because I can't accept anything less... I _will_ not accept anything less," he corrects himself as a chill goes down my spine.

"I..."

"And I can't have you going around making out with people behind my goddamn back!"

I bring my hand up my eyes and I start crying. Of course. Because I'm weak and I always cry.

"Stop it," he snaps. "Stop crying!"

Maybe I did mess up terribly by kissing Zabini. I was killing Draco's feeling, but... but he shouldn't be shouting at me! I've had a hard enough year and he hasn't helped me forgive him.

"Stop yelling!" I snap back after I wipe my tears away. "You're just like him! Always yelling at me!"

I push past him and go inside.

"Stop running away from me," he shouts from behind and he chases after. "Stop running away!"

I stop and glare at him over my shoulder. "You said the stupidest thing you've ever done was fall in love with me," I tell him harshly. "Well, I'm the stupid one!"

"Don't yell at me."

I throw my hands up. "You're the one that started yelling at me first!" I snap.

"Why was I yelling at you?" he snaps hatefully. "Why was I yelling, Ginny," he asks as he approaches me. "Tell me why I was yelling at you," he says as he gets so close his chest almost hits mine.

"Back off," I hiss but he shakes his head.

"Not until you tell me why I was fucking yelling at you in the first place."

"Because you're horrible!" I push him back. "Stop speaking to me like this. You shouldn't be talking to me like this! You don't get to speak to me like this!"

Our reunion should have been loving, not like this, not this heated. Part of it was my fault, I know that, but still!

"I was away for a long time," I tell him meanly. "How do I know you weren't doing anything with any other girl?" I counter and his eyes inflame.

"Because I am not a cheater," he snaps, putting his hand on his chest to make his point. "I can control my libido a lot better than you apparently can and just in case you're confused, let me clear something up for you. _We_ are not broken up," he says, grabbing my wrist. "We have never been broken up and I swear to God if you cheat on me with Zabini one more fucking time-"

"What?" I taunt, hating the coldness in his voice. "What are you going to do that hasn't been done to me already?"

"You are still mine, Ginny. You're still mine!" he yells at me with emotion making his voice sharp as a knife.

I shake my head, pissed off beyond belief, and I go to take off again... to get away from him... to collect my thoughts... but he blocks me and I inhale deeply through my nostrils so I don't snap.

"You don't get to run away from me," his voice drops to a darker level and he grabs my arm. "You don't get to kiss anyone else," He says, his eyes intense and stormy. "You don't kiss anyone but me."

"What if I don't want to kiss you?" I spit with venom.

"You're a liar," he says, leaning forward. "You're a fucking liar."

He presses his lips against mine in a demanding kiss and he grabs my arm when I try to get away.

I push him so hard he stumbles back. "You can't tell me what to do," I snap at him. He looks at me with his cheeks dotted pink with anger. "Leave me alone! I'm leaving and I don't want you to follow me."

I jump when I hear something shatter behind me and I pick up my pace and run towards the downstairs fireplace.

When I get to my room, I sit on the bed and stare out the window until the sun comes up.

My heart feels like it's been blown into ten thousand pieces.

As the dawn break against the horizon, I finally realize what it feels like to be alive again.

* * *

I feel awful.

Completely and utterly awful.

It's not the same kind of pain that comes with violence, it's a pain that rests deep in the heart. I take a bite of my apple and glare up at the sun. I shouldn't have treated Draco that way. I know that. But he just gets so defensive and he _yells. _

Perhaps his yells weren't out of anger, they were out of frustration and that I can understand. I do get why he's so frustrated. If he was taken and held up in Riddle Manor, what would happen if I was in his shoes? Fighting all the time for a cause I didn't believe in to bring him back... just so he can come back to ignore me and kiss my friends and sneak around behind my back instead of just talking to me.

I would probably yell a lot too.

And Blaise was right. I knew how Draco was when I fell in love with him and I couldn't stand it now just because it reminded me of Tom, but that wasn't fair either.

He wasn't Tom no matter how alike they seemed.

Draco loved me. The Dark Lord didn't love anything.

When I'm finished with my apple, I throw it in the grass and walk back towards the cottage. I've been avoiding people most of the day and I threw up again during breakfast. I just can't handle certain smells anymore and I feel like some big bloated mess of senses.

Daphne catches me at the door, taking a picture of me with her camera.

"Please don't do that," I say as I hold up my hand to the lens.

"I'm making a scrap book for the war," she says with a smile and I snort at the thought of war time photos on glossy pink paper. "To show my future children," she says as she takes another picture.

I glare at her.

"Please stop taking pictures of me," I say again as I walk past her.

"You should try it," she says as she follows after me, coming up behind to take another photo. "Things look much better through a camera lens."

Another picture gets snapped and I stop. I'm wearing a tank top because it's so hot out, so all the cuts are showing. I don't want to have a picture out there as a reminder.

"Daphne," I tell her as I put my hand on her arm to lower the camera. "Please, stop taking photos of me."

Her smile falters for a moment before she nods her head. "Of course," she says as she pulls the strap from around her neck. She hands it to me. "You should try it. Take some pictures. You'll find the beauty in things again. I'm sure of it."

I take the camera. "Can I ask you a question?" I ask and she nods her head as she follows me to my room.

"What is it?" she asks softly.

I close the door behind us once we reach my room and I take a seat on the bed. She sits beside me.

"What was Draco like when I was gone?" I whisper as I fiddle with the dials on the camera.

"What do you mean?"

"You said he was a mess... what was he like?"

"Oh," she says softly. "He was very unlike himself. Reckless, making very rash decisions." she shakes her head at the thought. "He was just very sad...You could tell."

I look down, feeling guilty again.

"Was he faithful to me?" I ask, thinking of Blaise.

"Why would you ask such a thing?" she whispers and I shrug my shoulder as I bring the camera up to my face to take a photo of her.

"I was gone for a very long time," I admit as I put the camera on my lap with a long sigh as I think of Draco's lust. "That's a long time to a guy."

"Draco is no ordinary guy," she says as I snap a photo of the window.

"You're right," I whisper as I stand up. "He runs much hotter," I say to myself as I walk towards it.

"Did you fight with him again?" she asks as she turns to look at me.

I don't answer.

"Over Blaise?" she says and I give her a surprised look. "You've been seeing him a lot," she admits. "We all know it."

"It's no ones business but my own."

"You know that never matters to people," she says, giving me a sad smile. She stands up as well. "I told you to be careful around him. Zabini is like a very gifted violin player... and he's playing all your strings."

"He's honest with me, at least," I whisper. "He talks to me plainly..." albeit more perversely.

"And doesn't that make you like him all the more?" she says seriously. "You're defending him now, aren't you?"

I won't tell her about the kissing. I lick my lips. "I miss..." I trail off as I think of my time with Draco over the year. "I miss talking to Draco," I whisper. "But I don't know how to talk to him anymore and then he just ends up yelling at me."

"Maybe you're not making it easy for him."

That was true.

"Can I borrow this?" I ask her as I lift the camera. "For the day. I will give it back."

"Of course," she answers. "Take all the photos you want. They might make the cut for my scrap book."

"How exciting," I say sarcastically but she doesn't catch it.

After a talk about what she plans to do with her pictures, she goes to her own room to play with her hair. I walk around the house to gather images for her scrap book. She's right. Things seem to look much better with a filter in front of you.

When night comes, I avoid dinner with my family and I find myself walking the halls of the Zabini house at Yellow Springs after changing into those horrible striped pj's that have become my comfort clothes.

I go up the stairs and start heading to Blaise's room to talk to him about that kiss and how it didn't mean anything and will never happen again, but I stop at the top of the stairs. I look at the first door on the right and the light that spills out from underneath it.

Draco.

My heart thumps.

I should talk to him first.

I _want_ to talk to him.

I knock gently and then I peek my head in his room when I find it unlocked.

He's awake and he looks at me with his brows raised as I open the door. He's sitting on his bed with only three candles lit about him and he's shining his shoes with a horse haired brush. I know this routine of his... he's very particular about things and I have no idea why I think it's sexy that he shines his own shoes.

I just do.

I can't help it.

What other eighteen year old boy would take such good care of his own footwear?

"Hi," I say stupidly as I close the door behind me and lean against it. "Can I come in?"

I was already in, but he understood what I meant because he nodded his head and started putting his shoe care kit away.

"Of course," he says flatly as he puts down his polished shoes to give me his full attention.

He's still burned by our prior fights... I can tell and I can't blame him for it because I was too.

"What's with the camera?" he asks as he nods to it.

I take it from over my neck and place it on the chair by the door.

"I was taking pictures. It's Daphne's," I explain to him awkwardly and he nods his head.

I walk nervously into the room and take a seat at the end of the bed... about a yard away from him. He stares at me and I stare at him before he finally speaks.

"You're looking well," he says, flicking a glance down my body, taking in the ridiculous worn striped pj's I favor.

I cross my arms.

"I look atrocious," I tell him sharply. "I _feel _atrocious. Everything seems to be bothering me," I admit to him because I can, because I can always admit these things to him. "Like my senses are heightened to an annoying level. I can barely stand the smell of half the things in the world now."

"Well," he says flatly as he stands up to light more candles. "You are still the prettiest girl I've ever seen. Atrociousness aside."

I feel my cheeks start blushing. "You haven't seen many girls then."

"Did you come here to fish for compliments?" he asks as he lights the fireplace with his wand to give us more light. He glances at me over his shoulder... he's wearing his sleep wear already, a pair of black sweat pants and a thin white cotton t-shirt. "I have plenty more if you want to hear them."

"You're being nice to me," I point out and it sounded stupid when I said it, but he didn't seem to mind.

He just shrugged his shoulder and went back to the fire.

"I don't like being mean to you, Ginny. I just get mad easily and you know I have a temper," he admits in a low voice. "I can't seem to help it."

I toy with that thought as he turns back to the fire, pleased that he's being nice to me. It's ridiculous that I think the boy who loves me would be mean to me all the time... Why do I think that way? Maybe because Draco_ is_ mean, actually. Just not to me... most of the time...

I watch him as he bends down grab some more wood to throw in... that's when I make out the outline of something under his shirt.

I stand up with a frown as I see the shadow across his back.

"Of course, if it's humor you want, you're in the wrong room," he says and I nearly flinch away because of the hurt in his voice. "Is Zabini not in tonight?" he asks me cruelly as he looks at me again. "Is that what I owe this pleasure?"

"What happened to your back?" I ask him, ignoring his hurtful words as I walk towards him.

He turns back to the fire and doesn't say anything so I walk up behind him and lift the thin shirt. I roll the fabric with my fingers until I see the source of my concern.

An angry looking raised scar cuts across the plain of his back, curling around his waist in an angry fish hook design.

"_Oh, babe,_" I whisper when I see how painful it looks. "What happened?" I ask as I reach shy fingers out to touch the ugly looking scar that cuts across his skin.

"_Babe_ is it?" he asks gruffly as he walks away from me, pulling his shirt down angrily. "You know there's a war going on," he says flatly. "I wasn't just off having picnics when you were gone. I was fighting to get you back," he says, sparing me a little glance before walking towards his bed again. "You know some scars magic can't heal."

I knew that all too well.

"Did that hurt a lot?" I ask with a troubled frown as I put my hands together so I can resist touching him.

He sits heavily on the bed and starts taking off his watch.

Another routine of his that I'm familiar with. "A lot of things hurt," he says flatly and I look down, biting my lower lip because I feel...

I feel horrible.

"Why did you come here, Gin?" he asks tiredly, his anger melting as he rubs his face. "What do you want?"

"I was..." I lick my lips as I walk towards him again.

What did I want? I hardly know, but I sit beside him again... closer this time... and I wait until he looks at me.

"I didn't kiss Blaise," I say seriously. "He kissed me, but I stopped him. I didn't kiss back..." I say quickly. I have no idea why but I feel like he needs to know that. "I didn't want it."

"I don't want to talk about it," he says seriously. "If that's what you came to say, then I would rather not hear it."

I bite my lip and look away with my hand on my neck.

"I just... I think you're a good person underneath it all," I say, not fully knowing if that was the truth or not but his words has been burned into my heart. "I don't think I'd..." I was going to say that I don't think I'd fall in love with someone who was evil... but that seemed ridiculous. "I don't think that you do all that you do for selfish reasons. "

"Then you don't know me very well at all, sweetheart," he sneers sarcastically.

I know he has to be wrong. That can't be right.

I long and heavy silence falls between us as the fire crackles behind us. I lick my lips so many times that they start to burn and Draco just stares at me, making me feel uncomfortable in my own skin.

"Maybe..." I say as I try to extend an olive branch of peace.

"Maybe what?" he snaps, but I ignore his harsh tone and I lick my lips one final time.

"I was wondering if you would heal me now," I say softly as I give him a shy look.

"The healers at the Manor are more than capable..."

"I want you to," I cut him off quickly. "Please?"

He eyes me for a moment, like I would have an alternative motive for my request, before he nods his head. A short and sharp nod. "Give me a second," he say as he gets up.

He leaves the room and I wait for a few minutes before jumping in surprise when he comes back in with a small jar full of clear looking snot.

Lovely.

"What is that?" I ask as he sits beside me.

"Something that will help with the cuts," he says as he unscrews the lid, putting his wand behind his ear as he works. "You're going to have to take off your shirt," he says, giving me a quick glance. "And your pants," he says and I feel that blush on my cheeks again.

"Is that what you say to all the girls you heal?" I attempt to joke. I attempt to be normal again and when corner of his lip turns up in a smile, I mirror him.

This is a step in the right direction.

"Only the ones I like," he says as I stand up and turn around so I can unbutton the pj top.

Do I want to be so unclothed in front of him? Of course, he's seen me in less, but I was a different person now... I was new... I look over my shoulder to find him watching me, an unreadable look in his silver eyes.

I go back to my top and slowly push the buttons through each hole. "You're not going to take advantage of me, are you?" I tease as I let the shirt hang open and I untie the strings to my pants.

"Only if you want me to," he says in a deep voice that sends a pulse between my legs.

It makes me uncomfortable with the friction. I haven't been turned on by anything in such a long time.

Once everything is loose and open, I turn to him.

To be honest, I would feel more comfortable with Draco healing me than a stranger medic and I was glad that I asked him.

"Come here," he says. He pats the bed beside him as I clench my shirt closed. He hands me the jar. "You have to rub that onto the cuts," he explains. "Then I can heal them with a spell."

"Okay," I mumble as I twist open the lid. "This looks like snot," I admit as I dig some of it out with my fingers. "It _feels_ like snot."

"It's not," he says with an eye roll as I sit back and open my shirt, revealing my bra.

It makes me blush thinking of him watching me, but I try to ignore it as I put the the snot on my skin. I start with my shoulder, rubbing it in until my skin glistens.

"Is this right?" I ask, looking up at Draco to see if I'm doing it wrong.

He gulps and then nods his head before getting up and going over to the window. I watch him for a moment as he puts his hand on the frame and he uses his free hand to rub the back of his neck.

Right.

I start on the other marks, moving my top and pants to accommodate my movements as I work. There are seven symbols in all cut into my body and when I'm finished I cough to get Draco's attention because he hasn't looked away from the window yet.

"I'm done," I tell him as I screw the lid back on and put the jar on the night stand. "You can look now," I mutter and he glances at me as I close my night shirt.

I'm self-conscious in this body now. Because of the abuse I had suffered, and the cuts on my skin... and it doesn't help that Daphne keeps pointing out that none of my clothes are fitting properly.

"Okay," he says as he picks up his wand and walks towards me.

He sits back down and he reaches a hand out to pull back my shirt to see the mark on my shoulder.

"Alright," he whispers as he licks his teeth. Then he glances at me. "I'm not doing this to be perverted, but I really do need you to actually take off your shirt," he says seriously.

I nod my head and pull my arms through the sleeves, letting the top drop to the side as he watches me.

"Did..." I trail off as I sit back against the head board with my arms crossed. Daphne was right, I have been gaining weight, and my bras hardly hold in my breasts anymore.

Something I was painfully aware of right about now.

"Did anyone... Did anyone see me when you did this?" I ask as I start fiddling with the draw string of my pants. I wouldn't care if Draco had seen me, of course. He knew my body better than I did... I just couldn't bear the thought of someone else seeing me.

"There was a lot of smoke," he says as he gets closer, staring at the mark on my stomach. "I don't think anyone saw you so unclothed," he says, calming my dread at the thought of everyone and their mother seeing me in my under things.

"Good," I whisper as he lifts his wand.

I clench my eyes shut. Behind my lids I can see the bright light of a spell that he whispers under his breath.

When I open my eyes again, the mark on my stomach is gone.

"That didn't hurt," I say as I run my hand over my newly healed skin.

"It's not supposed to," he says seriously.

He heals the mark on my right shoulder... and then on my left...

I stare at him as he works, his hair falling into my eyes as he heals the marks he put on me. To save my life... I've been spending most of my time away from the Dark Lord comparing Draco to him. To everything that reminded me of the two... why they were so similar. Two ambitious men who have very little empathy for the people around them... two men who used me to their advantage...

"Fuck," I hear Draco whisper as he fumbles with his wand when I pull my pants down so he can get to the marks on thigh.

I bite my lip, trying to hide a smile at the blush on his cheeks. He's being perfectly lovely right now. Maybe I was being unfair to him. Maybe I should be looking for differences instead of similarities. Draco flicks a little glance up at me and I smile a little at him.

He goes back to my leg and I can spy the corner of his mouth tilting up in a barely there smile.

_Draco smiles. _

The Dark Lord doesn't smile. It's all cruel smirks and mocking tilts of his lips. The things that please him, _the dark things that please him_, are nothing but mild amusements to him and his emotions are cold and stale. He doesn't smile because he has no real feelings. He never smiles just because he's happy... because the Dark Lord is never happy. Because the Dark Lord is a monster.

_Draco is blond. _

Obviously.

I snort at my own thoughts and bring my hand up to touch Draco's hair. His neck snaps up as I run my fingers through it and he gives me a puzzled look as I tuck some strands behind his ear.

"Your hair is getting long," I tell him honestly.

It's true. Draco had always kept his hair short and neatly styled but now the hair, that never went past his eyebrows, was tickling his cheek bones.

"I haven't had time for a hair cut," he admits as he stares at me.

He's finished healing my legs, so I pull my pants back up with a blush on my cheeks.

"Your hair is really long as well," he points out as he reaches out and tugs on a strand of hair that used to be my bangs. Now it's to my jaw... officially just part of my hair. "But you have lovely hair."

I blush again and bite my lip before reaching a hand out to touch his face.

_Draco lets me touch him. _

I never wanted to touch Tom Riddle, of course. I cringe just at the thought.. but Draco.. Draco is so guarded with himself that I'm almost proud that he lets me touch him whenever I want. I _want_ to touch him, I realize, and I let my hand drift over his face as he watches me.

"I don't want to fight anymore," I say gently and he nods his head. "I don't want us to shout at each other."

"That I can agree with," he whispers.

"I won't... I won't seek him out anymore," I tell him honestly as I think of Blaise Zabini and how badly I must have been hurting him. "I don't need his friendship that much. I won't talk to him," I offer because I know how jealous Draco gets and there's no point in putting him through any pain just for Blaise. "I won't speak to him anymore."

He looks into my eyes and I give him a little smile.

Then he turns his face and presses a kiss to my hand.

"You have facial hair," I tell him, running my fingers along his cheek like I was feeling him for the first time. "Like..._ real_ facial hair," I add with a little smile. "Like a man."

"You say that like you doubt my gender."

I snort in laughter. The Dark Lord's humor was mean and taunting, but Draco, his humor is dry and flat and I had almost forgotten how much I like it.

"It feels like sandpaper," I whisper as my hand travels to his neck.

"Sorry," he says with a shrug as I look at his lips. "I don't have time to do much of anything."

_I like kissing Draco. _

I haven't been kissed by him in months. Months and months and months... I look at his lips as he runs his tongue along the bottom one to wet it. I lick my own lips in response. I scoot closer to him let my hand rest on his shoulder. He puts his hand on top of mine and gives me a questioning look as he his eyes glide over my face.

_Draco looks at me like he loves me. _

He does love me, right?

"I love _only _you," he says seriously and I blink I surprise, not realizing I had said my thought out loud."And that is a rare thing, indeed," he says in a deep voice that makes my insides flutter.

I move even closer to him on the bed until I'm practically on his lap. He looks at me for a while before bringing a cautious hand up to cup my cheek and I resist pushing him away.

_Draco doesn't hit girls. _

He told me that himself. I know it should go with out saying, but after being around a man who had no problem hitting me, it felt nice knowing Draco never would. He doesn't hit girls no matter how annoying they are. I smile a little when I think of his words and he watches my lips as I tilt my head, leaning towards him.

"Ginny..."

I press my lips against his.

I close my eyes as I thread my fingers though his longer hair and I slip onto his lap with my feet dangling over his strong legs. I inhale before tilting my head more to slip my tongue against his. He smells good. Draco smells good. I missed that.

He puts his hand on my back as he lets me control the kiss with my timid and searching movements. He tastes like cinnamon tooth paste and I let my hand slide down his neck... then to his shirt where I put my hand under to feel his chest.

He shivers under my touch and he breathes out slowly before letting me kiss him again.

_Draco runs hot. _

The Dark Lord always ran cold like a snake and it would chill me every time he was near. I hated that about him... that and so much else. I don't hate Draco. He puts his hand between my knees like he always used to and I feel a hunger building inside of me as I adjust my position so I can straddle his legs.

_Draco feels good_.

He always feels good... I press his back against the bed and lower my mouth to his again.

_Draco tastes good._

He puts his hands on my hips as I pull back so I can run my lips along his cheek and neck. I pull back and make a face. I rub my mouth because it hurt and I sit up, glaring down at him like it was his fault.

"What?" he asks with a brow raised in question and his cheeks flushed.

"It burns," I tell him and he furrows his brows in worry. "Not like that," I say quickly, thinking of that ridiculous bond. "I meant, your beard thing that's growing on your face. It burns my lips."

He runs his hand up his neck and nods his head. "I'm sorry."

_Draco says sorry. _

I climb off of him and rest against his head board as he sits up to look at me with his elbows propped on the bed.

"I'm sorry too," I tell him as I look at his hands. "For being so terrible to you."

He doesn't say anything to that, so I pull him to me. Laying on my back as I let him settle between my legs, hovering above me.

_Draco turns me on_.

I kiss him again and I tug on the bottom of his shirt until he lets me pull it over his head. I run my hands down his chest. He looks down at me as I reach around to feel that scar on his back.

"I'm sorry," I whisper to him, complete honesty in my voice. "I'm so sorry about all of this... and I'm sorry about your grandfather," I tell him, thinking of Abarax Malfoy. "I'm sorry he died."

He leans down to press a sweet kiss to my lips, letting his weight rest on top of me as I settle my hands on his arms. I close my eyes as he places open mouthed kisses on my neck.

"I know you must miss your brothers a great deal. Life is never easy like we want it to be. I have learned that the hard way," he whispers against my ear before going back down to my neck. "I've wanted to kiss you for so long," he whispers to himself.

My neck...

I shake my head, trying to get the feeling of Tom's lips out of my mind. Sucking the blood from my body. I pull Draco's head up, back to my lips, to take my mind off of it. He brings his skilled hand up and gently runs up my stomach and breast. I inhale deeply as my insides starts to twist and spin wonderfully.

"You love me, right?" he asks gently as he pulls back.

"I love you," I say honestly as I pull him to me for another kiss.

He starts to rock against my body, letting me feel through his clothes just how turned on he is. My body responds to him shamelessly... until... until he starts rocking against me a little too hard and his hand comes up and grabs my wrist to hold me down... Then his kisses are too rough and his voice is too deep...His starts to pull down my pants and I freeze when they come off, fear gripping my heart as it all comes flooding back to me.

Like a tidal wave finally come to shore.

Tom.

The rapes.

The house.

The hits.

His weight on top of me.

I can't breathe.

I push Draco away from me and flip my body until I'm sitting at the edge of the bed with my hands on my knees, trying to catch my breath.

"Gin."

Draco's behind me in an instant as I gasp and claw at my thighs, trying to get the images out of my mind. He kisses my shoulder and puts his hands over mine, stilling my nails digging into skin.

I clench my eyes shut and inhale deeply, trying not to push him away.

Just don't push him away.

"Let's just sleep," he says calmly against my ear. "I'll hold you," he says as he kisses my cheek. I shudder and he pulls back. "Come here."

I nod my head, sweat beading on my brow as I let him pull me back until I'm laying under the covers. I turn on my side and he pulls me into his arms, wrapping himself around me as I close my eyes, trying not to shake.

"A part of me hates going to sleep," I admit softly, seriously after I finally calm down.

He lifts his wand and snuffs out all of the lights, leaving us in the dark that makes me cling to him closer.

"What?" he whispers deeply against my hair as I try to settle my beating heart.

"Sleep," I say gently. "I hate going to sleep. I dream of terrible things... and when I do finally wake up, I always think I'm back in that horrible house with the Dark Lord's presence looming over me."

He's silent for a moment before he runs his lips over my ear.

It makes me shiver.

"What do you dream of?" he asks gently.

I lick my lips, staring at the darkness ahead of me. "Blood," I answer. "Always blood. Whole oceans of it. Sometimes I feel like I'll drown in it," I admit flatly as I feel his hand tighten around me.

"You are in luck," he says as he runs his fingers gently up my arm until he reaches the hand I have stuffed under the pillow. "I am in the possession of a very sturdy boat."

I hear the joke in his voice and I feel a little smile turn my lips as he intertwines his fingers with mine. "I am very fortunate indeed, then," I say as I squeeze his hand. "That you have a fake boat to help me during my nightmares. I foresee that being very helpful to me."

"Perhaps your dreams are the only front where I can not help," he says softly, running his lips over the shell of my ear. "But if you always fall asleep in my bed, I can assure you that you will wake up in safe arms."

I bring his hand up to my lips and place a gentle kiss against his skin.

Draco speaks so well sometimes.

He doesn't say anything more and I don't either as he holds me a little tighter. I keep his hand against my lips as I curl my body... He moves to set himself around me a little more comfortably and I kiss his hand again because we fit so well this way.

_Draco cuddles. _

I'm very grateful for that fact right about now as I snuggle against him. I haven't been held in months. I fall asleep a few hours later to his beating heart against my back.

I have no dreams. It's a blissful night.

It felt so good to sleep against Draco again. I didn't realize how much I missed it and each time I woke up, panicked that I was at Riddle Manor, he was right there to talk me down and pull me back into his warmth. He didn't even snap at me for waking him up so many times and right before dawn, I blinked awake again, expecting to find the four walls of the Riddle bedroom, but instead I see Draco's face.

He's asleep and he looks so handsome.

I sigh softly and lean forward to place a gentle kiss against his slack lips for being so good.

It's less threatening to kiss someone when they're practically passed out and I'm taking full advantage of it.

I smile with my hand in his hair... then I kiss him again.

And then again...

And then again...

And then...

"Are you trying to wake me up?" he mumbles after I pull back and I smile even though he doesn't open his eyes.

"I'm sorry," I whisper as I press a kiss to his cheek, running my nose over his skin as he smirks.

I put another kiss underneath his ear and another on his jaw.

I pull back when he puts his hand on my face and he cracks his eyes open. "The sun isn't even up yet," he whispers as he lifts his head, tilting his face to the side as he brushes his lips against mine. "Did you dream of blood?" he whispers. "Should I fetch my boat?"

"I didn't dream of anything," I admit with a little smile, pressing another kiss to his lips. "We should go back to sleep," I say, catching onto his yawn as I yawn myself. "I am tired still," I mutter.

He rolls to his back and I tuck myself against him, putting my leg over his as he kisses the top of my head.

I fall back asleep.

When the sun is up and shining in the room, I wake again. Feeling cold, I reach for him, but he's not in the bed. I have a moment of panic, thinking the worst... thinking it was a dream. That I was really back in the Riddle house and Tom was going to come in and torment me, but when I hear the sink turn on in the bathroom, I inhale slowly in relief.

I sit up, rubbing my eyes from the sleep that clings to them as I glance to the bathroom. The door is slightly open, showing me Draco's reflection as he brushes his teeth. I get up and walk over to Daphne's forgotten camera and I snap a photo of the little bit of him that I can see. He doesn't notice. I smile a little, letting my heart warm over as as I grab his t-shirt and slink it over my head.

I approach him with quiet steps and when I open the bathroom door, he looks at me from his reflection.

"What are you doing up so early?" he asks. I walk further into the bathroom and I hop on the sink as he runs his toothbrush under the water. "I was going to let you sleep in."

I shrug and put the strap of the camera around my neck so it rests against my chest.

He doesn't say anything as he pulls his shaving kit from the medicine cabinet.

"Doing some spring cleaning?" I ask with my voice thick with sleep. I scoot back on the counter, resting my back against the large mirror as I draw my knees to my chest to watch him.

"Well, I don't want to burn off your skin every time I touch you," he says with a smirk as he opens his kit.

I watch him as he takes out his shaving cream and applies it to his face. He looks kind of silly with the fake white beard and I snap a picture of him with the camera Daphne had given me. I wonder if these will make the war time scrap book.

"You think this is photo worthy?" Draco asks. He looks towards the mirror and picks up one of his expensive metal razors.

"Yes," I answer. I snap another photo as he tilts his chin up to make the first motion with his blade. "You're so good looking," I admit softly as I take another photo.

I mean it. I love the way he looks. He might not have the smooth features that make Zabini so beautiful but he was just perfect for me.

I can't imagine a better looking man.

"Not as good looking as you," he says, sparing me a little glance before going back to shaving off that terrible facial hair.

I smile a little and feel a pleased blush on my cheeks.

"It's hard to believe we haven't wasted away staring at ourselves in the mirror, then," I tease as I take another photo. "With as pretty as we are."

I set the camera beside me to watch him as he works. After a few moments, I pick up his leather shaving kit and start peaking through it. It's all of his man grooming stuff and when I find his cologne, I take it out and read the label with my eyebrows raised. I take off the lid and sniff it, sighing softly at the familiar fragrance.

I had missed that.

"Do you like it?" he asks when I put the lid back on.

"I do," I nod my head. "You always smell so good."

"It's called bathing, Gin," he jokes and I splash some water at him as he laughs.

Then I look down at my legs, I raise my brows before taking out his shaving cream and a spare razor.

"What are you doing?" he asks as I lean over the sink to get my hands wet.

"You aren't the only one who's been neglecting your grooming habits," I tell him. I splash water on my legs before lathering them up.

"I wasn't going to say anything," he says as I put the ball of my left foot against the running faucet so I can steady my leg. "I thought you'd gone native."

I snort in laughter and shake my head as I start moving the razor against my skin. "It wasn't _that _bad," I say softly with my cheeks turning red.

He squeezes my foot and when I look up, he winks at me. I smile a little before he goes back to his face and I go back to my leg.

I bite my lip as I move the razor against my skin. He's almost finished by the time I move to my right leg and he sits back to just watch me for a while as I work.

He still has a bit of shaving cream on his face as he picks up the camera.

Before I can stop him he takes a picture of me and I push the lens away when he tries to take another. "Don't do that," I say quickly. "I look horrible."

"What are you talking about?" he asks as he backs up, leaning against the opposite wall as he fiddles with the focus, pointing it at me again. "You're beautiful."

I shake my head and I let him take a few more photos of me before he's had his fill. When he's finished, he sets it back down and places a kiss against my head. I roll my eyes and smile as he goes back to the water to wipe off his face.

I glance at my reflection.

"Do you think I look fat?" I blurt out as I run the blade under the water.

"What?" he asks with his brow raised as he uses a towel to dry off his face.

"Daphne said something about me gaining weight," I say with a frown as I glance at myself in the mirror again.

"Daphne's a moron," he says flatly. "You look fine."

I nod my head, believing it when he says it.

He puts on some after shave and I wash off my legs once I'm finished. "What do you think?" he asks as he bends down to me.

I bring my hand up to his face and run my knuckles over his cheek. "Much better," I say with a smile as he rubs his cheek against mine.

"No burn?"

"No burn," I whisper as he pulls back.

He hooks his hand under my knee and turns me until I'm facing him. He presses himself between my legs as he runs his hands up my calves.

"Better?" I ask with a blush as I put my hands on his chest, running my hands up to settle around his neck.

"I missed you so fucking much," he admits in a deep voice. He brings a hand up to my face as he studies each freckle and he sighs gently. "I will cut off his hand for hitting you," he whispers as he caresses my cheek, like he was remembering the smack at Clubhouse five.

I put my hand over his.

The old me would be horrified by what I'm about to say. The old me wouldn't even fathom it. But I'm not that stupid little girl anymore. I'm not that 'there's good in everyone' kind of person any longer. Ginny from a year ago wouldn't even recognize me.

"How about his head instead," I say, looking at his throat as he swallows.

"If that's what you want," he says darkly.

"That's what I want," I say quickly.

"Then that's what you'll get," he whispers before kissing me like we just made a romantic declaration.

_He will twist you and turn you into something so far from what you originally were that you won't even be able to recognize yourself in the mirror_.

Millicent Bulstrode said those words to me last summer. I glance at Draco before looking over my shoulder at the mirror again.

She was right.

But I don't care.

"I missed you too," I admit as I run my fingers over the top of his sleep pants.

I don't think I've told him that yet. I've been so cruel to him.

My hand starts to sneak below the waist band and his breath quickens just the slightest bit when I finally reach _him. _

_Draco's sex doesn't hurt. _

Well, that wasn't totally true. He was rough sometimes, but it was always consensual and he always made sure that I was taken care of too. I hold him in my hands firmly, gently searching like I had never done before.

When he's hard, and the top of his cheeks are tinted pink with arousal, I slip off the counter and kneel in front of him.

There is nothing pretty about the male anatomy. I try to avoid looking at it all together if I can, but there was something about Draco's that turned me on and I could feel my own arousal building between my legs as I helped him pull down his pants. Was it okay to be turned on after everything that's happened to me?

Draco's sex never hurt me. Rape wasn't sex anyways. Rape was violence and violence was disgusting. Sex was love and I loved Draco.

I lean forward to take him into my mouth, but he stops me.

I look up quickly, confused and little bit hurt.

What kind of guy would give up a blow job?

"What?" I ask pathetically as I sit back on my haunches. "Don't you want me to..."

"God yes," he says as he pulls up his pants. "You have no idea how tempting you're being right now."

"But..."

He doesn't say anything to that, he just pulls me up and I have a confused frown on my face as he looks me over.

"Draco, if you don't..."

"I do," he says gently as he bends down to brush his lips against mine with his hands tangled in my hair. "I really, really do," he breathes out as he runs his hands down my sides until they reach the bottom of his cotton under shirt.

He starts pulling it off and I lift my arms to help him.

"You have no idea how much I would love that," he says as he bends down to kiss my shoulder, pulling me closer with his hand on my hip. "Just thinking of your lips wrapped around me..." he trails off as his fingers slip across my midsection.

It speeds up my heart and I clutch at his arm as I lean my body into his.

"Just thinking about it..."

His hand slips under the fabric of my knickers and I quickly grab his wrist. He lets his forehead rest against mine.

"Please let me do this, babe," he whispers as he runs his fingers along my most sensitive spot. "Let me."

"I don't..." I close my eyes and rock against his hand. "I can't..."

I inhale a deep breath when I can't seem to find my voice.

I missed his fingers.

"I know," he says as he runs his lips against my neck. Then he slowly lowers himself down until he's kneeling in front of me. "I'm the one who should be on my knees right now," he says in a deep voice and it sends a pleasing shiver right up my spine.

"You don't..."

"I do," he cuts me off as he starts rolling my knickers down my legs. "I've been such a fool," he says as he places a kiss against my stomach... and then my thigh... and then my... "I'm so sorry, Ginny," he whisper before angling my hips and dipping his head down.

"Oh..." I whisper as he lifts my leg, resting it over his shoulder. "Draco..." I pull on his hair. I can't really say anything and he smiles up at me from his place between my legs.

"It's been way too long," he whispers and I arch my spine with my back angled oddly against the counter.

He uses his tongue and fingers and I tug my lower lip between my teeth as I look down at him. This was a good feeling, strange, but good none the less and it was something that Dark Lord would never do. I snort at the thought of him going down on any girl. It's almost ridiculous.

It _is _ridiculous, actually.

I thread my fingers through Draco's hair and arch my back when he hits a very sensitive part of me. I haven't had an orgasm in months either. I haven't even touched myself because it brought up too many bad memories for me... but what Draco was doing felt so good from what I went through... the dynamic was so different.

He pushes my legs a littler farther apart and my legs shake as I clutch at the counter, trying to keep my balance.

I almost forgot how good being intimate with someone felt.

I clench my eyes shut and try to keep my thoughts focused on how good it feels to have him touch me again. My body is heating up and my insides are tingling. It's a slow build, but he doesn't give me a moments rest and when I feel the beginning of that wonderful feeling, I have a hard time holding back a moan.

When my whole body starts to burst, I grip his hair and try not to rub against his face as he pulls back to finish me off with his fingers. I feel so warm and so good... I can't... I try to push him away because the feeling is too overwhelming, but he grabs my hand and finishes me off with his jaw clenched as he watches my face. When I'm done, I slump against the counter and he stands up, wiping off the back of his mouth with his hand.

"Was that alright?" he asks, looking down at me with a little smile on his face. "I've been out of practice."

I can't find my voice, so I nod my head.

"Thank you," I whisper as I lean forward to rest against his chest.

He pulls me into his arms and tucks my head under his chin as I close my eyes, trying to get my body under control.

I lick my lips and exhale slowly before pulling back and looking up at him. He looks so sweet right now. I take his hand and walk us from the bathroom and towards his bed. I take a seat on the edge and pull him to me as I scoot back on the mattress.

"You are not the Dark Lord," I say as I pull him on top of me.

"I am not," he says as he presses a kiss to my lips.

"When the war is over, what will you do?" I ask as I run my hands down his back, fingering that nasty scar.

I spread my legs a little wider as he rests on top of me, my body still humming from what happened in the bathroom. I want to give this to him. I want to be close to him too. He runs his fingers up my side, tickling my ribcage as he slides around to unhook my bra.

It's what I_ want. _

"Finish school," he says as I rest against the pillow, running my hands down until I reach the top of his sleep pants. He runs his lips over my neck. "Go to University."

"Will it be that easy?" I ask him as I start to pull them down.

"After the Dark Lord is dead, the government will go back to being a three person tribunal like it was before the Modern Ministry came into effect after the dark ages," he says as I reach between our bodies and he nearly hisses when I find him under the covers. "My father will be one of the three."

I want to ask him how he's so sure, but I wouldn't doubt that Lucius Malfoy would find his way in there.

"I will finish school and further my education once the country starts to heal," he says. He reaches out to touch my hair as I start to guide him into me... into a place where I thought I would never want to be touched again. "By the time I'm old enough we'll be back to elected officials."

I glance at him with a worried frown as he starts to sink into me. The feeling is so good that I bite my lower lip and try not to make a whimpering sound.

"I will run for the wizongamot until I reach the Order of Merlin first class," he says softly, closing his eyes once he's completely inside and we both take a moment to let out a breath of relief. "Once I have my strong hold there, Zabini will run for Minister of Magic."

"Zabini?" I whisper harshly and he nods his head as he slowly pulls back only to go in once more. "Why Zabini?"

"He's a good liar," he admits, placing a kiss against my lips. "And people like him better than me."

"I don't like him better than you," I say softly and he gives me a little smile as he sets a slow and steady pace. "And if anything goes wrong, they'll blame him instead of you?" I ask and he nods.

I know that's the way he thinks. It's not surprising.

"What's the point of all of that?" I ask. I turn my head to the side, putting my palm against his neck.

"I want to make our world be as it should be," he says as he reaches down to wrap one of my legs around his waist.

"And how should it be?" I ask as I lock my ankles behind his back. "What is the most important thing to you?" I add, thinking of Tom and what he would say.

He would say power. Always power.

"Truth," Draco says seriously before leaning down and giving me a long open mouthed kiss. "And you," he whispers against my lips as he picks up his pace.

"But truth first," I say gently before kissing his shoulder.

"You are my truth," he whispers before sucking on my earlobe.

I don't even know what that means, but that's a sweet spot of mine and it makes my back arch.

"Fuck," he whispers with his eyes clenched shut as he holds onto my thigh. "It's been too long," he whispers to himself as he picks up his pace, his voice becoming breathless.

I missed how Draco's sex felt and I could feel tears gathering in my eyes as I kissed him, cutting off our conversation so I could focus on his body against mine. How right it felt and how stupid I had been for avoiding him for so long.

Maybe this year... what had happened to me was his fault. I felt that way for a long time at Riddle Manor... but like he said, he was loving me and protecting me the only way he knew how... and right now I was loving the way he was loving me.

I didn't even think once about Tom because his sex was never sex in the first place.

When Draco tells me he loves me, I kiss him again and I ride out another amazing tremor in my body before he cusses to himself.

"It's been too long," he says in frustration with his head dropped against mine. "I can't..."

"It's okay," I whisper to him, sweat at my temples at I run my fingers through his hair. "It's okay, babe," I press a kiss to his lips.

"You feel so good," he whispers in a strangled voice as he bites his lower lip.

"Draco," I whisper, pulling his lips to mine to kiss him gently. "It's okay."

After a few more moments, he finally lets go with his jaw clenched and he kisses me hard as he thrusts a few more times before relaxing against me completely.

He lets out a long breath and stays between my legs as I comb my fingers through his hair with a little smile on my face.

I missed being close to him.

"I knew what you were doing... when you had that dagger in your hands at Folk Hills," he says softly after a moment of silence.

"What?" I ask with my brows furrowed in confusion as I run my hands down his shoulders and back.

"Why would you do that?" he asks as he pulls up to look at me. "You knew that it would kill you."

I lick my lips as I think of where my thoughts were during that time at Folk Hills. How sad and lonely I was... How I just wanted it to be over and the Dark Lord to be dead.

"Did you know about the Horocrux?" I ask softly. "Did you know I was attached to it?" I ask as I think about the marks on my body and the books on blood magic he was always reading.

"When I found out, I knew I could find a way to separate your soul from it. I just needed more time," he says flatly as he looks down at me.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I ask, my voice soft and barely a whisper as I touch his face.

He shrugs. "I didn't want to frighten you."

"It was too late for that," I tell him flatly as I let my hand fall to the bed. "I..." I blink and look away, with his body still pressed into mine. "I don't think you realize how I felt then. I was so lonely, scared all the time. I hadn't heard from anyone in months... and when you came and told me that they were getting Hermione out first... I thought..."

I trail off and shake my head.

"I thought of course they would get her first." I whisper bitterly. "No one cared about me. Tom had been telling me that and I believed it. You can't possibly understand. I just didn't care. I wanted it to be over."

"I understand now," he says gently, leaning down to kiss me again. "I never want you to feel that way again. It would kill me, Ginny, if you gave yourself up like that. You mean too much to me."

"The most important thing is the truth," I change the subject and I look away, bringing up our earlier conversation. "What's the truth?" I whisper as he leans closer to me. "Why do you care so much about our government?"

"I think that there's a ladder of hierarchy in the world," he explains. "And wizards and witches," he says, placing a kiss on my cheek as he finally rolls to my side, leaving my body cold. "Are on top and it's within our rights to make sure the world knows that."

"What does that even mean?" I whisper as I turn on my stomach to view him better. I know full well what that means, but daring him to say it out loud.

"It means, that we shouldn't be hidden," he says as he looks past my left shoulder. "We shouldn't be killing each other, and we shouldn't let people born of muggles dictating to us."

"You still think that way," I whisper. "After everything?"

"I still think that way because of everything," he admits and I run a hand over my face.

I make a face at the thought and how closely to the Death Eater's creed that is and he sees it.

"I never try to change your beliefs," he says as he searches my face. "It's unfair that you think mine are so disgusting."

"If I believed in throwing kittens into fires I think you'd be disgusted with that."

"Those aren't my beliefs and you know it," he says flatly. "I am not the Dark Lord, we just established that," he says seriously. "I don't want to kill everyone who looks at me wrong," he says, bringing his hand up to hold my earlobe. "I just want the world to be a better place than how it was when I was born," he says seriously.

I shrug out of his embrace and stand up with the sheet wrapped around me. "I just want things to be like they were before Tom Riddle came back and ruined everything."

"Things weren't perfect then either," he says. "Things are always changing. There are always flaws that need to be worked out."

"You talk like it's going to be a Utopia for magical people, but what about muggles and other creatures in our world? No one should be second class citizens, Draco," I tell him seriously. "No one."

"What do you think we are?" he counters with his brow raised. "Why don't you go into any muggle town and walk into their church. They have them on every corner. Tell them what you are and see what they do."

I don't know much about that, so I bite my lip and look away.

"Don't look so troubled," he whispers as he stands up. He runs his finger over my worried brow. "Let's talk about something else."

Thinking of his future plans for the world makes me feel insignificant and I glance at him quickly before looking at his throat.

"I thought a lot about you when I..." I trail off awkwardly as he sits down on the bed, pulling me onto his lap. "I mean... when I was locked away in that house... I thought about you a lot."

He brings his hand up and starts running his fingers through my hair.

"I fantasized about living with you. You know, like when you said that thing about me being able to write and stay home with kids and all that stuff?"

"It doesn't have to be that way," he says gently. "You can do what you want."

I lick my lips. "What if... What if I don't want _you _to do that government stuff?" I say as I look into his eyes. "I mean, it actually sounds kind of nice... writing and staying home. I don't think I would mind that... I know I was angry when you brought it up that first time, but I think if you hadn't dictated it to me like you had, I would have wanted it on my own."

He furrows his brows.

"But, I just... I think if you're off trying to rewrite history... what happens to me?" I ask, blinking hard, feeling selfish but not able to hold back. "Will you still... will you still be around?" I ask, trying to figure out the proper way to say this. "I feel like my whole life, I've just been trading in one prison for the next, and I can't do that anymore. I cant...I can't do that. I don't want that life if I'm not... "

I can't say it... it's just too selfish.

He runs his hand down my arm. "If you're not what?" he asks.

"If I'm not the most important thing in your life." My eyes get wet as I pull away from him, feeling incredibly horrible for saying that out loud. "I know that's not fair... things are always more important, but I just... for once in my life... I want to feel like someone can't live without me. I know that makes me a bad person for wanting that," I whisper to myself as I cross my arms.

"Ginny," he says, tilting my face towards him. "If you don't realize already that you are the most important thing to me, than I have no idea how else to convince you. If I could have your love always, I would live in a shack if I had to."

"No, you wouldn't," I snort as I cross my arms.

A little smile tilts his lips.

"You hold a lot more power over me than I would like to admit to anyone." He brings a hand up to my hair. "You are the only person I will allow to have that kind of advantage." He leans down and kisses the corner of my mouth. "You're my queen."

_Queen Ginny. _

"I don't want to be a queen," I whisper and he puts his forehead against mine.

"Then what should I call you?" he asks seriously.

I have no idea.

"If I'm a queen, does that make you my king?" I ask curiously and he pulls back to look down at me.

"No," he says seriously. "That makes me your slave."

I laugh at the thought of Draco being subservient to anyone, let alone me. The thought is ridiculous and just as I opened my mouth to tell him so, there was a sharp knock on the door that brought us out of the conversation.

"Who is it?" he asks sharply.

I move to find my clothes to put back on. No sense in letting someone come in seeing me so unclothed.

"Your father wants us to pick up the post at Diagon Alley in half an hour," That's Harry voice and when Draco opens the door, I turn my back on them to quickly button my pj top. "He says its important that we comply."

"How long will we have to be there?" Draco asks sharply as he walks towards his dresser to get a pair of slacks.

"Most of the night. The troops are gathering down the street..." he trails off and I'm sure he sees me now. He coughs uncomfortably and I glance at him over my shoulder.

"Hi, Harry," I say once I'm completely dressed and Draco disappears into the bathroom to finish getting ready.

"Hi..." he trails off awkwardly and then he rubs the back of his neck as he glances at the bed and then to me... and then to the bed.

I sigh loudly as I slip on my shoes.

"Is there going to be a fight?" I ask and he shakes his head as he looks away from me. I hear the sink in the bathroom and I take a step closer to Harry as he stands in the doorway... looking uncomfortable.

"I doubt it," he says as he pushes his glasses up. "Someone probably just left the post without signing out. It happens all the time."

"Oh..." I trail off and look at the bed... He looks too and when he sees my bra just kind of... lying there... his cheeks turn bright red.

He looks away quickly as I try to be nonchalant about covering it up with the blanket.

The silence is suffocating and I breathe a sigh of relief when Draco comes back into the room.

He's dressed in a dark striped shirt and black jeans and when he sees me, he smiles. I smile back and go to pick up his wand from the side table so I can give it to him.

"I'll...uh..." Harry fumbles with his words and Draco spares him an irritated glance as I hand him his wand. "I'll see you guys down stairs."

"Bye, Harry," I give him a small wave as he walks off.

"I'll walk you to the fireplace."

Draco takes my hand and intertwines my fingers with his as we leave his room. He explains to me what the posts in Diagon Alley are for and why he and Harry have to do it. They're both quick with their wands, he tells me, and they don't like each other, so there's no chance of them talking to one another... There's no chance of them missing something because they're not paying attention.

It was actually kind of funny the way he was describing it. He wouldn't make friends with Harry even if his life depended on it and it seems to be the same on the other side as well. But they were civil to one another now, even though sometimes, Draco says he wants to pick up a rock and throw it at Harry's head just to see if he can hit his scar.

When we get down stairs, Blaise is in the hallway. I clench my hand around Draco's when he notices us. Draco doesn't even acknowledge him as we walk past. He was leaning against the wall, but he stands straight as we pass and I see him zero his gaze down at our linking hands before making a face and walking off.

I felt guilty for half a second before Draco leaned down and kissed me.

When we get to the fire place, Draco puts his hand on the mantle place, caging me against it as he smirks down at me.

His mood has brightened considerably and I feel happy that I can do that to him.

"Be safe, yes?" I say and he nods.

"I'm not sure how long I'll be," he admits. "It might be close to midnight when I finally get back."

"Midnight?" I whisper in surprise and he nods his head.

"Can I come to you afterwords?" he asks gently as he tucks some hair behind my ear. "I doubt your family would appreciate me showing up so late. I might have to sneak into your room," he says with a smile. "Like old times."

"That would be fine," I nod my head and let him kiss me. I put my hand on his chest when he tries to deepen the kiss. "Later?"

He nods his head and winks at me before turning the knob and pushing me in.

I land at Shell Cottage with a smile on my face, only to find my Mother in the kitchen... sitting at the table like she was waiting for me.

"Hi?" I say awkwardly as I try to make myself look less... guilty.

"Where have you been?" She asks, her voice taking on a very familiar edge.

The 'I'm your mother and you will listen to me' edge.

"Out," I say as I bring a hand up to my neck... I haven't had to answer to anyone in so long that I didn't even realize that staying the night with Draco would affect others.

"All night?" she asks with her eyes narrowed. "You can't just stay out all night."

"It's not like I'm staying 'out'," I tell her with a hand on my hip. "I only have two other options. I can't go to a club or anything."

"I don't appreciate your tone, Ginny," she says, pointing a wooden spoon at me.

I snort, but cover it with a cough. I just can't believe this conversation. I'm not very sure about this scolding... it seems so silly after everything that's happened... but when I look at my Mom... with her tired eyes and frizzy hair... I know she's reaching for normalcy.

I can give her that.

"I'm really sorry," I tell her. "I won't do it again," I add, trying to hide my smile. " I'll go my room and think about it."

"Wait..." she trails off. "Yeah," she nods her head. "Yeah, you go to your room and you stay there until I call you down for lunch."

I smile as I leave the room and shake my head at how weird that was. I jog up the stairs and when I get to my room... I pull out my note book. My entries seem to be more and more pleasant now and I bite my lip as I start writing about Draco.

I get called down for lunch and I pretend to look sorry as I eat my sandwich. Then I go back upstairs again and spend the rest of the night by myself, playing with Henry and reading a book to pass the time until Draco comes.

Sometime during the night, I venture down the hall to use the loo and on my way back, I hear Pansy's voice carrying through Daphne's room.

I pause a second, debating whether I should knock and say hi.

"You can't marry him, you know," I hear her say as I bring my hand up to rap against the wood. "He's a Weasley."

I put my hand down.

"Draco has a Weasley," I hear Daphne pout and I can't help but think they're talking about me like I was a breed of dog.

"Draco has the means to take care of Ginny," Pansy whispers. "If you married George Weasley, who would take care of you?"

"My parents..."

"Your father would cut you off," Pansy cuts in and I tilt my head to hear better. "You know better than that."

"George is smart," Daphne says.

"George is a Hogwarts drop out who hasn't even tried to fuck you yet," I blink hard at the blunt and terrible way she's talking. "I think being here by yourself has messed with your mind," Pansy hisses hatefully. "You don't even know if he likes you."

Someone stands up and I back away from the door.

"You're a beautiful witch with wealth and pedigree on your side. Stop trying to settle for the closest thing with a dick. At least try to find someone who will have a few coins to rub together after this fucking war."

I make a face at her words.

"You're being awfully rude," Daphne snaps. "I take it your so pissed off because Zabini refuses to screw you."

I hear someone scoff.

"Because he's too busy trying to screw Ginny Weasley," Daphne sings like it was a song and my cheeks heat.

"Well, we all know that's not going to happen, now don't we?" Pansy's voice is full of venom.

"Do we?" Daphne asks cruelly.

"It's not polite to spy on people," someone whispers in my ear. I jump and spin around.

It's Draco, and he's smirking at me.

"I..." I trail off awkwardly and he smiles at me.

"Come on," he takes my hand. "Stop listening to those catty bitches."

I let myself get pulled to my bedroom.

I climb onto my bed as he heels out of his shoes. "How was the post thing?" I ask as I watch him unbuckle his belt.

"It was alright," he says and then he flicks me a glance as he pulls out his belt, setting it on the side table. "Boring as fuck."

I give him a thoughtful look as he takes out his wand, placing it beside his belt. I've been doing nothing with my time back. I've been selfish. "Draco..." He looks at me as I knot my fingers. "I'm... I'm kind of strong," I tell him and he gives me a funny smile. "I mean, my magic can be strong. I could help, join the rebel fighters."

"It would be too dangerous for you to go out, babe," he says softly, like he thought I would snap at him for it. "The Death Eaters would jump at a chance to capture you. You're the only thing that could help the Dark Lord get healthy again. We can't... I can't risk you like that."

I nod my head in understanding, thinking of all the restrictions I always seem to have.

"I'm good at things now," I say to myself. "Tom taught me."

"Why do you call him that?" he asks hatefully as his watch joins his wand and belt on the table.

"What? Tom?" I asks and he nods sharply. "Because that's his name."

He shakes his head and sits beside me, putting my face in his hands. "That's not his name, not anymore. He hasn't been a man in a very long time, Ginny."

I shrug and push his hand off.

"I can do wandless magic," I tell him. "Not everything, but enough to help."

"I know," he gives me a little smile. "Every time I see green flames I know it's you." he touches my hair. "You set everything on fire."

I give him a look before allowing him to kiss me as the moon shines in through my window.

_When the seventh moon is in the second house..._

I push him back and straddle his waist.

_A powerful union between to the two families... _

I kiss his jaw and unbutton his pants. I look up when one of the candles on the nightstand flickers to life.

_Will set the world on fire... _

The flame is green.

Like a snake.

* * *

"Why are you crying?" He asks with a frown on his face as I inhale a deep breath, my eyes stinging with tears.

"You killed him," I say with a trembling lip as I sit with my legs crossed on the blanket, trying not to out right sob.

"It was just a spider, Gin," Draco says as he looks at me like I was being ridiculous. "And it was crawling on my arm."

I am being ridiculous. I can't help it. I just feel so sensitive lately.

"I know," I say with a shaking voice as I wipe away more annoying tears with the back of my hand. "But what if it had a family?"

He snorts and shakes his head as he reaches out to squeeze my calf. "It was just a spider. No reason to cry," he says and I nod my head as I try to catch my breath.

"I don't know what's wrong with me," I admit in a quiet voice. "Everything is making me cry," I say and it's true. I started crying earlier today when Ron said I looked tired just because I thought he meant that I looked bad.

It's getting out of hand, really.

"I guess I'm just all out of sorts because of the war," I whisper as I wipe away more tears. "And what happened with Bill."

Bill has been missing for two days. He went on a mission with four others to find a warlock to help with the cause. They found half the group dead... hanging from a black tree in Knockturn Alley with the dark mark carved into their chests. Bill and an Order member named Jillian haven't been found.

My family has been in a tail spin ever since.

He nods his head as he sits back to stare at me. We're outside, sitting under one of the willow trees inside the well warded grounds around Shell Cottage. I love being outside and, even though it's really hot out today, I would rather be hot than inside... cooped up like I was at Riddle Manor.

I tilt my head back and inhale the fresh air as I adjust my gray dress. It's one of the only ones I can wear now. It's a cotton blend, almost like the material of the t-shirts Draco wears to bed, and it has small cap sleeves that cover my shoulders. It has a stretch to it and falls around my knees. All my other clothes are a little too tight now...

"I'm hungry," I say out loud because it's true... my stomach is growling.

"What do you want?" Draco asks flatly as he picks a piece of grass and twirls it in his fingers.

He's fiddling with things. He doesn't enjoy wasting time like this... sitting out here when there are so many plans to be made inside... but he's doing it for my enjoyment and my sanity. With so much sadness around me right now, I can't handle being cooped up, listening to people cry.

"I don't know," I admit as I touch his hand, still wrapped around my calf to show that I do appreciate his company. "I don't know why I'm so hungry. I just ate. I'm getting pudgy," I whisper, half hoping he'll contradict my statement to make me feel better.

It so silly, really. After all that I had been through I have no idea why I even care what I look like.

He's silent for a moment and then he flicks me a little look. He got his hair cut yesterday, bringing it back to it's former glory and I smile at it before he speaks.

"You're not pudgy," he says and I give him a grateful half smile even though all of my clothes that I can't wear would protest. "But you have gained weight."

I let that smile fall and tears sting my eyes as he sits up. How could he say that to me? I deserve to gain weight after all I've been through! I open my mouth to tell him all that before he reaches out to touch my face.

"Don't cry," he says quickly. "I'm not pointing that out to be mean. You have gained weight," he says again and I actually start crying in full. "But it's all right here," he says as he lets his hand drop to my stomach.

Then I get it.

Then I shake my head.

"No.."

"The crying... the mood swings.. Throwing up..." I shake my head as he keeps going. "Ginny, when was the last time you had your..." He trails off and I push his hand off my stomach.

"My what?" I spit out harshly and he rubs his eye with the heel of his right palm.

"You know what I'm asking," he replies sharply. "This is uncomfortable for me to talk about too."

"I've had it," I hiss at him, knowing full well he's talking about something men and women shouldn't talk about with each other. "I can't believe you would even say that to me!"

"It's a possibility, Gin," he says seriously as I struggle to get to my feet. "You know it is."

"No, it's not!" I scream because it can't be... because I won't allow it to be.

"Sweetheart-"

"No," I snap with my hands up. "No pet names."

"It's okay," he says, approaching me quietly as I turn away from him with my hands on my hips. "It's okay," he whispers, reaching out to touch my back. "We would be fine if that's the case," he says and I start breathing heavily. "I don't mind, Ginny."

"You were the one who said that disgusting thing about abortion," I tell him hotly, trying not to have a panic attack.

It's too hot outside now.

"I was just trying to make you feel better," he says softly. "I wanted to give you options."

"What about your plan? You said teenage pregnancy would be a stain on your reputation."

He sighs loudly and steps even closer, kissing the back of my head. "There's always a surplus of young pregnancies during wartime. It would be okay," he repeats, bringing his hand up to squeeze my arm. "We could do it. You're safe now."

I step away from him with my arms crossed tightly over my chest as I close my eyes.

"I'm not pregnant, Draco," I say flatly, coldly.

"Alright," he says gently. "I still think you should have a healer-"

"I'm not pregnant!" I scream. I actually scream and a bird flies off of a branch overhead from the noise.

"Gin..."

"No," I hold up my hand. "This conversation is over."

"Why are you being so abrasive about this?" he asks sharply. "I'm trying to be nice. It's obvious to me and everyone else that something is happening to your body... "

"Everyone else?" I snap as I face him full on. "Who else has been talking about it?"

"Everyone who knows I've been fucking you," he says and I flinch at the terrible way he's speaking.

I curl my fists and tense my jaw. "Stop talking like that," I say in a low voice and he runs his hand over his face before giving me a look.

"Ginny, I am trying to be patient." I roll my eyes, like it's hard for Draco to act like a decent human being and he should be given a pat on the back when he tries. "You drank the counter potion to birth control. We were together multiple times after that... " he pauses a second before taking a step closer to me, trying to calm his temper by inhaling deeply. "It makes sense if you're showing now. Unless you've been fucking any guys I don't know about there's only one possibility I can draw."

That last sentence cut me like a knife and I really feel like turning around and running away from him. To where? I have no idea... but I can't seem to move. I just keep on staring at him as pictures of Tom and his forcefulness run through my mind.

I exhale slowly before glancing at him with my hands on my back... like a pregnant woman. I quickly let my hands drop and turn away from him again.

"I didn't have sex with anyone else. Not by choice," I say out loud for the first time and I hold my breath as Draco stares at my back. "The Dark Lord... he..."

I couldn't seem to say that terrible word out loud.

"What?" He finds his voice after a few long moments and I turn to face him.

"The night of the battle of Hogwarts.. when I went away," I tell him as he stays stone still, watching my face with his hands curled into fists at his side. "I blacked out for a moment," I explain to him. "When I woke up.. I thought I was in bed with you," I tell him as I remember it.

I feel sick.

"It was a spell or a curse or something," I fumble for words as he stares at me so closely I feel like he might burn my soul. "But he... I thought it was you. We were doing it all the time and I guess I was confused..." I tell him as I look at his shoes, realizing how stupid I was to think it was him. How stupid and naïve and ridiculous. "I would have fought if I knew it was him. I..." I trail off and blink away burning tears. "I thought it was you."

He doesn't say anything. I feel embarrassed and ashamed talking about this. This was the thing that never happened and as he stares at me I knew that I shouldn't have freaking said anything. I should have kept it to myself. I shouldn't have told him...

"The spell wore off... but I wasn't strong enough," I wipe away tears and shake my head. "The second time..."

"The second time?" he interrupts in a deadly voice as I turn towards the willow tree.

"I tried to fight, but he's bigger than me," I explain like it was my fault it happened as tears slide down my cheeks. "He was so mad because I killed Nagini and he... he was being so rough... I couldn't stop him... it hurt too much..." I exhale a long, shaking breath. "I tried..."

I can't finish. I just can't do it anymore and I cover my eyes before and I realize something. I almost panic as I think of the rest of my family finding this out.

"You can't tell anyone," I tell him as I look into his eyes. He looks so cut off right now and I approach him carefully. "You can't let anyone know. My mother," I cover my mouth with my hand when I think of it and then I reach out to touch his wrist. "They can't handle it. Especially now with Bill missing. Please, Draco, you can't tell anyone that he did that to me. You can't tell anyone."

He pulls away from me, running his hands over his face and exhaling slowly.

He turns around and I feel so fragile as I stare at his strong back. Then it all comes crashing down on me. Of course he would turn away. Draco was always such a jealous boyfriend... even if I looked at someone a little too long for his liking he would get pissed off. He probably can't even look at me now knowing I let someone else do that to me.

Of course he would think it was my fault. He thought it was my fault when I signed the contract that got me into that position... I shouldn't have let the Dark Lord do that to me. I should have kept fighting. I'm such an idiot.

"I tried to stop him," I whisper to his back, thinking he must think I'm untouchable now.

Disgusting and untouchable.

"I didn't want to," I say with a cry in my voice. "I tried to stop him. I fought him. I did." I'm stuttering like an idiot now. "A-And... I had some birth control that Ruth Davenport gave me. I took it as soon as I could but I threw it all up as soon as I drank it. I should fought harder, but I couldn't."

I kept fumbling through my thoughts on the matter and I didn't even realize he said my name until he was standing right in front of me with his hands on my cheek, tilting my face to his.

"No more crying," he says as he wipes away tears. "We will not cry anymore," he says seriously.

"But..."

"I've been in denial," he says as he leans down to brush his lips against mine. "I could feel when our bond was broken. I knew what that implied, but I didn't want to believe it." He presses his forehead against mine. "I love you so much."

He kisses me.

"This choice is yours," he says seriously. "But there is a chance, that if you are pregnant... it could be mine," he whispers. "The Dark Lord isn't a man anymore. It would be harder for him to... to produce that kind of outcome," he adds uncomfortably.

"You won't just tell me what I should do?" I snap, rather unfairly, considering he's being so sweet.

He doesn't say anything to that.

A loud bang disrupts us and we turn towards the cottage. It was a strange noise, and we shared a look before another loud bang shook the earth and nearly made me topple to the ground. Someone screams from the cottage and Draco and I start rushing towards the house. I find Fleur in the kitchen, with her face pale and her hands shaking. Draco asks her whats wrong but she just points to the doorway.

We walk with cautious steps into the living room.

What I see makes my stomach drop.

The Dark Lord's army has surrounded the perimeter of the wards. There were hundreds of them and my mother yelps in surprise when she comes rushing down the stairs to see.

"I will get my father," Draco whispers before disappearing into the kitchen.

I walk closer to the window. Daphne is leaning against the couch, watching the Death Eaters gather with her eyes blinking rapidly.

"How does he still have so many people following him?" she whispers worriedly. "They can't get through these wards," she whispers with a frightened expression on her face. I glance to my left where Harry is and we share a look. "The Malfoy's did them. They have the best wards ever... they can't get in."

Order members start to come in through the fireplace with their wands ready. I watch them crowd into the room before turning back to the window. A cloud of black smoke appears, soaring high into the air before it lands with a loud bang in front of the hoard of masked Death Eaters.

I swallow hard.

I know exactly who that is and as he materializes, I move back... like the distance would help.

I keep retreating, basically hiding behind my other family members as my breath quickens to an unhealthy level.

I can see him through the bodies of the Order as I keep moving back until I hit a wall. He paces in front of the wards. It's hard to see from here, but I can tell that his black cloak is lined with purple silk. I get a glimpse of it as the fabric billows behind him, the only flash of color in the mob of black and grays.

I didn't realize my hand was shaking until someone grabs it and I look up in surprise as Draco steps beside me.

"Breathe," he whispers because he can tell I'm starting to lose it.

"What's he doing?" I hear my mother's voice as more Order members come in, filling the room to it's max. "He can't get in."

"He has something you want," I hear Lucius Malfoy from the kitchen and I freeze. "Look," he says, walking towards the window and pulling back the curtain with his wand. The Order members part like the red sea to let him through. "Notice the two captives towards the right. Don't they look familiar?"

"That's Bill and Jillian," Ron says and I drop Draco's hand to get a closer look.

"He wants to talk," I whisper as I watch the Dark Lord pace and bark demands to the people behind him.

_This_ is why they took Bill and the other Order member. I can see Yaxley and his pig nose right behind Tom and my throat gets so tight I feel like I might pass out.

"He would have killed them by now," I add as the people in the room send me sideways looks.

There's a silent pause as my words sink in and then someone shoots a curse right at Bill's throat.

Fleur screams behind me and someone tries to calm her down as Bill's body slumps to the side. After a silent moment, he stands straight and the Dark Lord walks towards him. I watch as Tom grabs his shoulder, pulling him close to hiss in his ear.

"What's he doing?" I hear Ron ask as I bite my lower lip.

"Bill can walk through the wards," Draco points out as the Dark Lord clenches his leather clad hand on my brother's shoulder.

He makes a motion with his hand. Someone comes up behind him and places a dagger... _the dagger_... in his palm. The Dark Lord says something else to Bill and then presses the dagger into Bill's waiting hand.

We all watch as my older brother walks through the ward barrier with the dagger clenched in his fingers. He pauses a few yards from the cottage and Fleur goes to run out the door, but my father pulls her back.

"He's cursed," he explains. "We must be cautious."

"Well, then let us go see what he has to say, shall we?" Lucius Malfoy says with a sharp eyebrow raised.

I get pulled back by my mother and I watch with dread in my stomach as Draco's father and my father approach my cursed brother with careful steps.

It's a heated argument that none of us can hear and then I cover my mouth when Bill lunges at Dad with the knife ready to strike. A few others from the Order run out to help as Bill wrestles my father to the ground. I watch as Lucius Malfoy tries to subdue him before... before Bill turns around and buries the blade right into the older Malfoy's chest.

Then all hell breaks loose.

People run past me to get outside and others pull me back. "We need to get you out of here!" My mother yells as she grabs my arm and drags me to the kitchen. "The fireplace must be barred so it won't compromise the other two camps."

"What?" I ask with a furrowed brow as she grabs some floo powder from the pot and stuffs it in my hands.

I look through the open door to try to find Draco, but it's of no use. There's too much commotion going on.

"Ginny," she says seriously as she grabs my face. "Lucius Malfoy was our secret keeper. His death means the cottage is compromised. You must leave now."

"The death eater's can get in?" I ask in a panicked voice.

I hear yells and screams outside as more Order members come in through the fireplace with panicked looks of alarm on their faces. A red light starts flashing on the mantle and I hear Henry hiss when someone steps on his tail. He hides under the kitchen table and I watch him as he glares at the world.

"There's not much time!" she yells as I back into the wall. "The fireplace will shut down once that red light stops flashing. Ginny, you have to leave."

She grabs my arm again and, just before she throws me into the grate, I stop her.

"Henry."

"What?" she snaps like a mad woman.

"Henry. I can't leave him!" I go to pick him up, but he runs from under the table and hops up on the counter by the sink... where the window is open...

"Don't be mental," she hisses at me as she tries to pry my fingers off the mantle, keeping me from stepping into the grate. "Leave!"

She doesn't understand what Henry means to me.

"It's just a cat. He'll be fine."

She really doesn't get it. Henry is more than just a cat to me and when he jumps outside, I know I have to get him and bring him back.

My mother is old and out of shape, so it's easy for me to maneuver around her. Once she realized what was happening, she opened her mouth to scold me, but I pushed her into the grate and turned the knob twice until she disappeared into the network.

When she was gone, the light on the mantle stopped flashing and black bars slammed down in front of the fireplace opening.

I swallowed hard, but when I heard a window shatter somewhere towards the front of the cottage, I knew that Lucius Malfoy was dead and the death eaters were coming.

My heart ached for Draco and what losing his father would mean to him, but when a curse came flying just past my head and shattered a container of flour, I knew I had to do something.

I needed to find Henry.

He favored the thicket of woods not far away from the beach. I picked up my mother's discarded wand, running out the back door and heading towards the woods as the fight waged behind me.

"Henry," I call as I run between the trees. I know the noises must have scared him and he's hiding somewhere.

I fumble over a tree branch and catch myself on a thin stocked tree. I call his name again and pause when I think I hear a meow. I hold my breath and when I hear it again, I take tentative steps towards the noise until I find him huddled under a log.

"What are you doing?" I ask in relief as I pull him out. He's shaking and he resists as I try to rip him from his safe place. "It's okay," I whisper against his fur as I pull his trembling body to my chest. "I will protect you."

If I can get further out, I can Apparate. Maybe once I get him to safety I can come back and help the Order. I pause a second to look around me before clenching my fingers around the wand and taking off again with Henry's reluctant body against my own. As I scurry through the woods, I can hear footsteps... running towards me...

I panic and pick a rather large tree to hide behind. I see two dark figures chasing one smaller person with dark hair when I peek around the trunk with Henry held in a death grip.

I know her instantly.

It's Pansy and I bite my lower lip as she throws a curse over her shoulder, hitting one of the masked death eaters in the face.

The person falls to the ground and doesn't get up. I assume he or she is dead and so does the person who was running beside them because an anguished scream came from the other Death Eater. It was a woman and she tears off her mask to reveal her face.

It was Alecto Carrow and she looked insane.

I would bet that the robed person who just went down was her brother.

"You traitorous little bitch!" she hissed as Pansy sprinted straight towards the tree I was hiding behind. "I'm going to gut you like a fish!" she screams and Henry jumps from the noise.

He freaks and fumbles out of my arms.

"Henry, no," I whisper as I watch him take off to hide once more. "Damnit," I whisper to myself right before I hear Pansy fall to the ground with a yelp of pain.

My focus shifts back to her as she scrambles on her back, holding her shoulder. It's oozing blood all over her hand so I know it must be bad.

Alecto has a pleased little smile on her face as she approaches Pansy and I clench my mother's wand as tightly as I was holding Henry.

"I am going to kill you," she says with her rotted teeth showing with a demented smile. "Like I killed your father at the battle of Hogwarts. Then I will bring your skin to the Dark Lord so he can hang it on the ministry walls with the rest of the betrayers. So future generations can see what happens to blood traitors!"

She lifts her wand, but I lift mine faster and I disarm her quickly. Her wand flies in the air and smacks against a tree, cracking it in half. She looks frightened for a moment until I step out from behind the tree with my wand raised at her chest... then she smiles.

"You," she says like we were old friends... Like she was pleased to see me. "We've been waiting for you," she says as she pulls back her sleeve to reveal the dark mark. She places her thumb against it and it starts to darken into a deep and dark red.

"Kill her, Ginny," I hear Pansy say as I look into the eyes of the crazy woman whom I've hated. "Don't even think about-"

I threw the curse even before she could finish her sentence and Carrow had a shocked look on her face as she fell to her knees. Then she slumped forward in the dirt.

"What curse was that?" Pansy asks as I walk towards her to take a look at the wound on her shoulder.

I shrug. I'm not even sure if it was a real curse or not. It just kind of happened. "She's not dead," I point out as I pull back some material from the gash on her arm. "Just knocked out."

"Let me remedy that for you," she says as she sits up and takes my wand, pointing it at Carrow with a sneer on her face. "I never liked her," she says before shooting the killing curse at her prone body.

I don't even bat an eyelash at it. That's how sick I've become and I try not to dwell too much on how horrible my soul has gotten as I go back to Pansy.

"I can't heal this," I admit as I use her torn shirt to stop the blood flow. "I'm rubbish at healing charms."

"It's alright. I can get someone else to heal it later," she says as I stand up and offer her my hand to help her to her feet. "Thanks."

She dusts off the back of her pants with her good arm before handing me my wand.

Then I hear Henry making the most terrible noise.

"No," I say as I leave Pansy behind to find him.

He's hissing and crying and I can tell he's in pain.

I start running, ignoring Pansy and her pleas for me to stop. I follow the noise as it echos off the trees and rattles my insides, like it was a horrible record playing a tune only my mind would hear. Down by the beach, I see _Him_ holding my Henry with a group of black robes around him. He has my cat by the neck and Henry is twisting in vain to get away. I stop dead still at the end of the forest and when the Dark Lord sees me, he smiles a little.

"I thought this was yours," he says as he_ throws_ Henry to Yaxley stationed right behind him. Yaxley's nose is bleeding something awful and I would call that an improvement. "It was only a matter of time before you came running."

I study his face. His body is more rail thin than I remember and he's pale. So very pale. It's like his skin was dusted with chalk and charcoal. His face was frightening... like a waxy mask of what a handsome man used to be and his lips and the hollow of his cheeks had an odd bluish hue to them...

I couldn't stop staring at him and he stared right back at me without a word. His eyes had the familiar red color I had come to fear, but the whites of his eyes now had a dark red tint to them as well. It was hard to distinguish where the iris started... It was like someone had injected blood into his eye and never stopped.

He looks like a demon... or a rotted corpse of one.

It was horrifying.

"Come here," he says flatly and I swallow hard at the soft, but firm way he's speaking to me.

I look at Yaxley who's holding Henry in a death grip. "Can I have him back?" I ask nodding to my cat and the corner of the Dark Lord's lips turn up in a pleased smile.

"Of course," he says as he holds out his hand and beckons me to him. "Come."

I take a tentative step towards him. I don't even know where Pansy is now, but she's not saying anything. I take another step as I watch Henry tremble in Yaxley's arms.

"You've grown in my absence, Ginevra," Tom says, sending a sly look down to my stomach once I get close enough. "Do you hear that?" he asks, grabbing my mother's wand and snapping it in half with a smile. He tilts his head to the side and inhales deeply as he puts his hand over my stomach. "A steady heartbeat. One so strong it could bring me back from the poison you slipped in my drink."

I don't even bother to wonder how he knew about that when he obviously didn't know when it was happening. I swallow hard and try not to stutter out my words as I push his hand away.

"It's probably not even yours," I whisper harshly as I think of Draco and his sweet words to me earlier.

That makes him laugh.

He laughs and he laughs and he laughs.

"You are still so naïve," he shakes his head and takes a step closer to me. "You can think whatever you want," he says as he grabs my arm so roughly I nearly cry out. "Because your thoughts are all you're going to have to accompany you from now until eternity."

I hear screams and we both turn to the cottage to see what the commotion is. A large dragon made of fire is roaring high into the sky before diving down, setting most of the woods ablaze. The Fiend Fyre curse. I know that it's Draco and my heart starts beating a little faster.

"You can't make me do anything," I say, standing stock still as he puts hair over my shoulder and inhales against my neck.

The gray sky starts to gather clouds in the distance and a dark murkiness approaches with the promise of rain as Tom glares down at me.

"That may be true," he whispers against my skin and it sends a chill down my spine. "I might not be able to make you do anything... but I can do many things to you," he whispers menacingly against my ear. "And you will be surprised how often that turns to my favor."

He makes an odd groaning noise as he inhales against my neck again. I nearly throw up when he presses his hips against me.

"All this blood shed has made me thirsty," he whispers as he pulls me towards the trees. "Watch out for rebels," he calls to the few Death Eaters at his back and when they all mumble affirmations, he pulls me deep into the forest until we're covered from view with thick trees. "You have no idea how many times I have thought about peeling your skin off in retribution for the disrespect you have shown me," he hisses as he slams me against a tree, caging me with his strength.

A slight drizzle starts to fall from the sky, letting droplets land on Tom's hair and shoulders.

"It's an all together pleasant fantasy for me to revisit when I'm feeling low," he says as he presses his knee between my legs. "Your screams," he sighs as he bites on my ear, tugging my earlobe. I try to slink away from him, only to be held onto more firmly. "They're like ambrosia to me," he says darkly. "And then I'd let my men heal you and you'd be as good as new to play with again."

"You're sick," I whisper honestly because he is, because no one in their right mind would be the way he is unless there was something wrong with them.

"Yes, well, you're the helpless one caged against a tree," he reasons before bringing his wand up to my neck and whispering the familiar spell. "Let's not throw stones."

I wince as I feel the two marks puncture my skin again. I clench my eyes shut and dissociate from the situation as he bends down and starts sucking the blood out.

He puts his right hand over my mouth to stifle the cries I didn't even know I was crying. I try to think of something else. Something pleasant... something nice.

Who am I kidding?

There is nothing pleasant or nice left in my world. Lord Voldemort made sure of that... and just like that, resistance seeped into my mind as I brought my hands up to push him back. He merely laughed at the attempt. When he had his full of my blood, he pulled back with my wrists gripped firmly in his hands.

"It's amazing, the affects your blood can have on me," he says, his front teeth coated in red. A little bit of color starts to come back to his face and his eyes start to clear. "Better than any potion," he says with a smile... and then his red eyes flick to my stomach.

He licks his teeth.

"Although," he says as he lets go of my wrists and starts to crouch in front of me. "Perhaps I should just cut this out of you now," he says as he places his hands on my protruding stomach. "Even without the rest of the potion, I think he would bring me back to my former self."

He looks up at me, squinting against the rain that has gotten heavier.

He smiles.

"You look so pale," he says as he runs his hand over my abdomen. "Don't fret, my darling. I told you I would fill you again," he says as he presses his ear to the... thing inside of me. "It's a boy," he says. "A very strong boy."

That makes my eyes water. His confirmation was worse than any spell or curse and I felt my insides crumbling at the thought.

He presses his ear tighter against my stomach like was listening for something.

He wasn't doing it like a proud father wanting to listen to his baby kick against him. He was doing it to size me up and decide the best way to... do the terrible thing he's about to do.

He takes out his wand and runs it along my stomach.

"This is going to hurt," he says after pulling back and lifting my dress, leaving my legs bare and cold against the rain. "You're going to scream and cry," he says with a little smile on his face like the thought pleased him. "And beg and plead."

"Wouldn't you want to see it come to fruition? Wouldn't the magic be even more great if he was actually born?" I ask quickly to stop him from cutting me open.

"No," he says simply. "This will be over quickly and then you will be taken back to your tower, princess, where you can rot until the end of the world."

When I feel the first pain of his wand against my stomach, I grip his shoulders and push him away roughly.

He laughs.

When I do it again, magic flies through my fingers tips and shoots him back against a tree.

He stops laughing.

He pulls himself up with feline grace and levels me with the deadliest glare.

"I offered you the world and this is how you repay me?" he spits as he glares at me. "You are the most ungrateful brat I have ever know," he nearly shouts that and I press myself further back into the tree as I tug my dress down. "I have decided to make every moment of your life miserable. When you're all alone, feeling terrible, with the dead bodies of the people you had loved at your feet you will finally realize my retribution."

His voice is rising as the battle gets closer, the fiend fyre curse eating away at the woods surrounding us.

"Only then will you truly be sorry, my Ginevra, only then will you understand all the dire..._ dire_ mistakes you have made," he says, repeating that word like it was a death sentence. "You will view your time with me before this moment as a mercy."

I turn tail and start running.

I don't want to listen to him talk anymore about the torment he wants to put me through because I know how true it will be if he catches me.

He always catches me.

But I keep running as he chases behind me, throwing curses and threats at my back as I sprint through the trees until it hurts to breathe... until my legs give out from the stress of running after being idle for so long.

I trip and stumble on the root of a large dense tree. I fall to my knees and he comes up behind me with a smug laugh in his voice as the rain makes mud of the ground.

"You can run all you want," he says as he comes up behind me and grabs the back of my hair. "But I will always-"

He didn't get to finish that sentence because something exploded to the right of us and sent us both flying back. I smacked my head against a stone and darkness overtook my vision as I tried to hold on to consciousness.

I don't know how long I was passed out, but I woke with smoke in my lungs and the smell of fire all around me. I blink a few times as my mind spins around like on a merry-go-round and I try to sit up, only to slump against the ground in a weak heap.

I cough to get the cotton from my throat and I can see shadows in the distance, silhouetted against the dying sun. Curses flash in crazy colors against the trees and people yell and scream at each other over the roar of battle.

My head is throbbing. With sore muscles, I bring my hand up my forehead, hissing when it burns in pain and I pull back only to find my fingers covered in blood.

Blood.

It makes me remember who I was running away from and, even though my body was in pain, I sat up straight and looked around me with panicked eyes to see where he went. I don't see him anywhere and I quickly scramble to my feet so I'm not at a disadvantage when he decides to strike.

Where is he? I bring my hands to my chest and look around me with my brain throbbing in pain. I slump along the trees, keeping my eyes peeled for the Dark Lord and I put my hand to my head like it might help deaden the pressure I feel there.

I hear footsteps and I snap my head up to see Tom. His nose is bleeding and he's running right towards me.

I panic and start running again.

Suddenly a cloud of black smoke appears before me and I fall back as Tom materializes in front of me. This time he has Henry. He cracks his neck as I move in the mud, crawling backwards. I stare up at him and my poor cat who's hissing and trying to wiggle away.

"You know what really pisses me off," he says as he casually walks towards me, with his wand at my chest. Mud starts to coat my arms and body as I crawl backwards through it. I just can't seem to pull myself up."Your total disregard for your own life. You have no idea how maddening it is."

"Put him down," I say pathetically as I stop crawling and just stare up at him.

"No," he says flatly. "You see, little one, I do not do what you say," he snaps. "You do what I say!" he shouts and Henry hisses. "Let this be your first lesson," he says as he grabs Henry's neck and then he... snaps.

I feel like all the sound had left the world as I stare at Henry's limp body.

Tom throws him to the side like he was nothing and I clench my jaw so tight that my teeth hurt.

"Why won't you just leave me alone!" I scream, so tired of all of it.

"You," he says as he reaches down to grab my ankle. "Know why," he snaps as he pulls me towards him.

It was a mistake, because I kicked him in the head with my other foot.

His expression was deadly as the surprise made him pause and I took the distraction to get up and sprint away. A curse shot at a nearby tree makes it fall and land right in front of me... I fall back and fumble around in the mud and rain as he gets closer. I finally pull myself up and face him with my hand up in defense.

I really wish I had a wand.

Tom is drenched from the rain and his black hair is falling into his eyes. He smiles a little bit when he sees my hand shake and he tilts his head to the side as he lifts his wand.

There's another explosion that sends us flying and my back smacks against a tree. I scream in pain but I refuse to let him get the upper hand when I see him get to his feet a few yards away. I give him a look and when I notice him scan the ground I realize... I realize he doesn't have his wand.

We both spot it at the same time... it's an equal distance between us and a wicked smile crosses his terrible lips as he raises his brows in challenge.

"Beat me to my wand, Ginevra," he smiles. "And try to kill me with it."

I work my jaw as I stare at him and then at the wand, laying against a bed of wet leaves.

"Do you think you could kill me?" he ponders out loud as my toes curl in anticipation. "I don't think you could even hurt a fly."

There's a second pause, and then we both run for it. His long arms reach it first and we both fall to the ground as I try to wrestle it from him. He laughs at my attempts and eventually his size over powers me until I'm pinned to the ground with his wand against my throat.

"It's always amusing when you decide to go with the muggle way of doing things," he says as he presses the tip of the wand into my neck. "That's why I will always win," he says with a smirk. "Because you're too stupid to realize what you can do."

"Are you going to curse me?" I ask with my brow raised as I reach my hand out to finger a nearby rock.

He smiles, holding my gaze. "You know I have no problem doing that."

"Do you think it will hold?" I ask once I have the stone in my hand. "I'm pretty good at deflecting your curses."

He laughs and sits back. "One thing I do like about you," he says as he uses his wand to brush hair out of my eyes. "You never know when to shut your mouth. Perhaps I'll have it permanently sown shut," he says as I clench my fist around the rock. "But then..." he ponders with his hand on his chin. "I wouldn't be able to kiss you and I just love how disgusted that makes you feel."

He leans down like he was going to kiss me. I take the distraction to bring the rock up and I slam it against his temple.

He cusses as the shock makes him fall to the side and I hit him again, straddling his chest and hitting him again and again and again and again... until blood sticks to the rock and the wand rolls from his fingertips.

I drop the rock and grab his wand, pointing it at his throat as he laughs, with blood gushing from the open wound at the side of his head.

"What do you think, little one?" He asks with a blood coated smile. "Are you going to kill me?"

I hear a loud scream in the distance, but I don't look up. I hold his blood red gaze even as the forest starts to go up in flames. He smiles again and for some reason that makes me think of Draco... or even Blaise. How easy would it be for them to turn into this monster underneath me...

"Why..." I press the wand a little bit more into his neck. "Why are you so evil?" I ask and he laughs again.

"I don't think I'm evil," he says with a smirk. "That's an ugly word, isn't it?" he says with a pout. "One could call you evil for bashing my head with a rock," he says. "Now I have a headache."

He brings his hand up and grabs my wrist. "Stop," I say, pressing the wand against his throat once more, but he doesn't stop, his hand just clenches around mine.

"You're a whiner, Ginevra Weasley," he snaps as he digs his fingers into my flesh so hard it hurts. "You whine and cry and complain, but you never do anything about it. That's the main difference between me and you," he says sharply. "I get things done."

He throws me off of him and he's on me in a second, prying his wand from my fingers as I try to fight back. This time he doesn't wait to talk or ask questions, he sends a curse right to my chest that makes me black out.

When I dream, I dream of blood. A whole ocean of it and I'm just a small bird flying overhead.

"Ginny..."

I shake my head.

"Ginny, fucking get up."

That's Draco's angry voice and he's pulling me to my feet as I try to open my eyes. The air is thick with smoke and there are flames surrounding us... green and red... crackling high into the air like it was Christmas.

"What..." I trail off, trying to remember what had happened...

"We're getting out of here," he says. "The Death Eaters have scattered."

"Draco..." I trail off and stop him with my hand on his arm. "What's going on?"

He looks at me, his face full of blood and ash. "We have to get out of here or we're going to burn to death."

"Wait," I go to stop him again but there's something in my right hand... something I'm clutching in a death grip. I look down at it, shocked in surprise when I see the Dark Lord's wand. "Where is..."

I look around me... there's too much smoke... too much fire.

Am I dead? Is this a dream? It feels too real to be a dream.

"Jesus," he hisses and when I look at him again, his silver eyes are trained on my thighs. "You're bleeding.

"W-What?" I stutter like an idiot as my legs give way underneath him. I fall against his chest as I blink against the smoke.

"You're _bleeding," _he repeats as he looks down at my dress.

I follow his gaze down... where a large maroon spot is saturating the front of my dress and coating my inner thighs.

"I..." I stutter as I start to shake.

I start to fall again, but Draco grabs me under my arm and lifts me up. My hands shake as I drop Tom's wand. I clench my eyes shut and Draco cusses as he pulls me through the forest.

I can see Tom in my minds eye, looking handsome in a black tailored suit in front of the Hogwarts gate drinking a glass of wine that he tilts my direction.

_I've always liked you in red._

His voice is like an echo in my mind and I clutch Draco a little tighter as the pain starts to awaken in my stomach, following the blood that flows down my legs.

_When the seventh moon is the second house, a powerful union between the two families will set the world on fire. _

Fire and blood.

"Just breathe," Draco says with his lips against my temple.

_Just breathe._

Why is that so difficult all of a sudden?


	20. Chapter 20

_A/N: Good news! I am not dead, or injured, or sick... I've just been taking my good old time writing this chapter. It's going to be a bear. This is actually the first chapter of a two part season finale... so prepare yourself and don't be sad when this cuts off because there is more coming._

_That being said, I'm sorry it took so long to update. I know a lot of people were worried. I'm thinking I should actually leave a note somewhere just in case something happens to me in my real life. Then someone will have all my passwords to let my fanfiction friends know what happened to me. Apparently people would care!_

_Also, to address some rumors flying around that I might be turning this into a published story... I actually have no idea how that started or where it came from. I love writing and I do work on stories outside of the fanficton genre, but I would never turn one of my online stories into a book. _

_These stories are written by a fan for fans. The characters do not belong to me and even if my stories are original and some of the characters I flesh out are my own... I just feel like that's not what fanfiction is about. _

_Like I mentioned, I do write original works outside of fanfiction and I'm all for making money off of those, but this is free for everyone and I only write them because it's fun. _

_And I swear to Zues if I see one more freaking thing about Fifty Shades of Gray online or on T.V. I'm going to have a goddamn conniption. It was a crappy fanfiction to begin with and now it's a crappy book. _

_Sorry if you love it, but I literally feel my heart clench in anger whenever I see it mentioned ANYWHERE and now all my facebook friends seem to have found it and are posting about it all the time. Maybe it makes me so mad because there are actually GOOD fanfictions out there and everyone who just loves that book don't realize it._

_Ugh._

_Freaking Twilight._

_That is all._

_-rrabbit_

* * *

He's crying.

I can hear it ringing in my ears and I just can't stand it. It makes me feel so sad, so hollow, so upset... I pull myself from the bed and quickly wrap myself in a silk robe to ward off the night time chill. I run down the maze of corridors as the cries get louder, echoing off the walls and making the windows shake.

I don't know much... but I know that I must get to him soon.

I must make it so he's not crying anymore.

It hurts my heart to hear him cry.

I find him in a dimly lit nursery that has wooded landscapes painted on the walls. The trees twist and turn like they're alive and dancing to music only they can hear. I ignore them and walk towards the gently swaying cradle, smiling down at his tears...Finding myself relieved to see him after all my night of searching.

"Don't cry," I whisper when I finally pick him up.

I brush my lips over his head and carry him to the rocking chair that's covered with a patchwork quilt. It's right in front of a large bay window where I can see the ocean outside moving in the moonlight. The waves are crashing against the shore, dancing to the same music as the trees on the walls.

The baby makes a noise and I glance down.

He's so perfect.

I press my nose to his hair and inhale... the smell of him almost intoxicating, filling me with a warm feeling I had never known before. It makes me smile. I open the robe to pull down the strap of my night gown, watching his face illuminated in the pale light as he eats from my breast. The way his cheek curves, the slant of his eyes... the perfect bow of his lips...

He looks like his father.

I bring his small hand up to my lips and press kisses to his palm.

I love him more than I thought I could ever love anyone.

I feel like my whole life was just waiting for this moment... for him...to be his mother... to love him... and everything that came before and everything that will come after is just filler.

Unimportant filler.

He stops crying when he eats and I smile again as I hum a little song, running my hand over his soft hair while I hold him close. My voice keeps him calm and soothes his fears just as his face soothes mine. I close my eyes after a few moments and stop humming as I let the peacefulness of the scene settle over us.

_Us. _

That's what we are now.

An _us_.

Two half people who made a whole and my heart will belong to him always. No matter how much time or pain will pass, that is one truth I will always know.

I_ know._

The sound of the ocean hums through the quiet room. The water reaches toward land and then pulls back... reaches out and then pulls back...reaches out...

I hear an odd tinkling noise.

It breaks the silence and I look over my shoulder into the dark vastness of the room.

The mobile above the cradle is moving in a slow creep and a bell like melody is playing... It kind of sounds like a wind chime on a breezy day.

I frown and stand up with the baby against my chest to investigate.

It stops moving after I flip the switch on the side and I stare at the mobile with a worried frown. Something doesn't seem right... It looks like men are hanging from the strings that dangle down... like they were being strangled by a noose... but that can't be right.

That can't be right at all...

I squint my eyes in the dark as the baby whines against my breast. Of course, now that I see them in focus, I realize I'm wrong. They're just sea creatures... innocent enough... a friendly octopus, a beautiful mermaid, a joyful rainbow fish...

"Sorry, sweetheart," I whisper to the grumpy baby as I walk back to the rocking chair, trying to shake the nonsense out of my head.

Silly me.

I look back at the ocean, the waves crashing against the beach as the stars shine above the water. I start humming again and we fall back into a peaceful rhythm, just like the ocean outside. His little heart beating four beats for each one of mine. It's a story written long before either of us were here and will continue long after we're dead.

_Dead._

The lights flicker and I look up to the brass chandelier that hangs down from the ceiling. One candle is burning brightly, revealing a blood red ceiling made of shining cut glass. I frown when it goes out, the smoke curling into the midnight air and making the room smell like fire.

_Fire_.

Once back in the darkness, I turn to the window and I feel a very uneasy chill crawl up my spine when I realize the water outside has stopped moving.

It's completely still, like a muggle painting instead of a live scene before us and the silence is deafening with no wind or waves to break it. I feel my heart starting to speed up and I lick my lips nervously as my eyes jump around the room, trying to find out what's happening...

There's a loud bang that shakes the walls and I jump when the baby starts screaming.

"Shhh..." I whisper. I pull him close, placing kisses on his head as I try to ease his fear. "It's alright."

Right?

The lights flicker on, blinding us, before quickly going out again. This time it takes the moon and the stars with it... leaving us in pitch black darkness. There's nothing now... no moon, no stars, no light of any kind...I can't see a thing and I feel myself starting to shake when the temperature in the room drops below freezing.

I try not to panic as I hold the baby closer.

He's crying, of course. Crying and crying and crying and I cradle him to my chest, trying to soothe him with words of love and reassurance. Words that make me brave because I have to be when I'm with him.

"It will be okay," I lie to him because I truly don't know. "Everything will be fine."

I'm a horrid liar.

I press my lips to his hair and keep repeating those words over and over again until I almost believe them. The darkness is all consuming and frightening but it's the silence that's truly eerie. It's like we're in a cave of some sort and every movement... every breath... is amplified and echoing off the walls to feed the beast that rests below.

The beast that is waiting to swallow us hole at any given moment.

We sit in the dark for days it feels like. Days and hours and months and years... until the lights come back on without warning.

Every single candle in that chandelier is lit, burning brighter than any sun. It's hurts my eyes and I have to blink a few times for the world to come back into focus...

When it does, my heart drops and stops beating altogether.

I'm no longer facing a large window with a beautiful sea side view. Instead, I'm staring directly at a black stone wall that's weathered with age and there's some kind of black liquid oozing from the cracks. I stand up quickly and place a protective hand on the baby's small head as I try to figure out what magic is making this happen.

_You must have been a beautiful baby... _

I snap my head over my shoulder when I hear that familiar song as the baby's cries shake the walls. The mobile above the cradle is turning again. Spinning, spinning, spinning at a hyper speed... making all the little sea creatures go flying from the ends. The trees on the wall are twisted and dark and the horizon line behind them is shining with a blood red sun.

_Blood. _

I blink a few times... I must be going mad.

_You must have been a wonderful child... _

"Ouch," I hiss and look down at the baby.

I think he just bit me.

_When you were only starting, to go to kindergarten..._

I wince in pain at the feeling as the music plays loudly.

_I bet you drove the little boys wild... _

_wild... _

_wild... _

_wild... _

_wild... _

_wild.._.

_wild... _

_wild.. ._

The mobile song starts skipping, replaying the same word over and over again before turning the opposite way with a mechanical clink and clank of it's gears. A whole different song starts playing and I'm frozen into inaction by my fear.

It's big band music from an older time that shakes the walls in a bass lead rumpus.

_It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that swing... _

I remember Tom playing that song. I remember him saying it was playing the first time he tortured a muggle. I remember it playing in club house five where I had witnessed so many horrors. My feet feel cold and wet, so I look down. That black liquid that was seeping from the wall is flooding the room... I fear I may drown in it.

I can't swim.

_It don't mean a thing, all you have to do is sing..._

It keeps going, it keeps playing, and I back up until I hit the wall. The music is too loud... the light is too bright... my heart is beating too fast...

"Ow!" I yelp again when I feel another bite against my breast.

When I look down, all I see is blood... blood as red as a rose that coats my nightgown and robe. The baby I had loved is gone, replaced by fangs and red eyes swaddled in a blood soaked blanket. When he hisses, I really do drop him, and I cover my mouth when I see a snake slither from the depths of the black water pooling at my feet.

The black snake grows and gets bigger as the music gets louder. I crumble against the wall, unable to take my eyes off of the beast as it pulses with the music. The snake waves it's body in front of my face and I clench my eyes shut when it snaps forward to finish me off.

_It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that swing..._

I scream and sit up straight right before the fangs can bury into my face. When I find myself within the four walls of a familiar bedroom, I exhale loudly in relief.

"Another nightmare?" I hear Draco ask as I wipe the sweat from my brow.

I almost feel like crying, but I don't dare.

I'm done with tears.

I nod my head as he rubs my back and I squint when he turns on the light. I've had nightmares just about every night since the battle at Shell cottage. They're vivid and not going away.

"Here, babe," he whispers, pressing a glass of water to my arm.

I take it and swallow a large gulp after trying to catch my breath. The water feels good against my throat. I didn't realize how sore it was... I must have been screaming and I feel guilty for waking Draco that way... again...

"Thank you," I whisper as I put the glass on the side table, my heart still beating so fast I may have a heart attack.

I can feel him staring at me, so I cough.

"Bad?" he asks and I nod my head, a short and sharp nod as I try not to remember.

"Did you dream about anything?" I ask after a long pause to take the heat off of me.

I give him a little smile when he doesn't answer right away to make him comfortable, trying to shake off the tremor of that terrible nightmare.

"No," he says seriously and I nod again as he dances his fingers up my bare arm.

Of course. Draco never has things that haunt his dreams. He has no regrets and I doubt he truly fears anything.

Not like me. I'm afraid every second of every day of everything and every one.

Time has made me pathetic when it's made everyone around me brave.

I would be more angry about it than I am if I wasn't so afraid to tempt fate for the millionth time. I know that I should be dead by now... but I'm still here, still living, and still having nightmares that make me want to cry.

Time does not heal all wounds. I know that for sure.

Draco wraps his hand around my upper arm and squeezes gently as he watches my profile. I glance at him and smile as he leans over to kiss my shoulder.

"Lay down," Draco orders as he runs his fingers up my spine.

I hesitate a moment before nodding my head and laying against the pillow. Draco pulls me to him quickly and buries his nose in my hair, adding a kiss to my temple as he wraps his arms around me. I think he likes holding me... I wonder if it makes him feel strong.

"What did you dream about?" he asks as he rubs my arm.

I shrug.

There's no reason talking about it.

It's the same every night... the same dream where I see a baby as a demon snake with Tom's presence looming over me. How can I explain that to him without sounding mad? How can I tell him without hurting his feelings?

I can't. So I don't.

A silence falls between us and I feel him kiss the top of his head before reaching his arm over to click off the light.

"Let's go back to sleep," he says seriously, his voice sounding deep and sleepy. "I have to get up soon."

I nod and let him hold me a little tighter.

He has more posts to hold and missions to go on.

Just because the Dark Lord was dead, didn't mean the war was over. Wars are not won in a day and I'm realizing now how true that is. I always thought that once Tom Riddle was finally killed, the world would be righted and the sun would come out over our kind... .with birds singing and bells ringing... all that rot.

I was wrong.

It doesn't help that no one is sure how he died. Once the smoke cleared, he was found a few feet away from me, his throat cut with black blood oozing from the wound... black blood... like the black water coming from the cracks in the wall...coming to drown me in it's darkness.

I shake the thought away quickly. It does me no good to dwell on the things I see when I close my eyes. I need to focus on what's real... what's tangible..The things that I know to be true.

I turn my face and kiss Draco's chest.

He's real.

I know that for sure.

I don't remember anything from the battle, of course. I blacked out and no matter how deeply they try to pry into my mind, nothing will come to the surface. Even though people said they saw me walking around, holding a long black wand...The Dark Lord's wand... They saw me using magic during the fight, flinging curses that cracked through the air like fire bolts.

They remember things I don't even recall doing.

Like killing Death Eaters with simple curses aimed right at their chests.

I don't remember that at all.

A part of me is glad, but another part knows that I must be crazy.

I roll on my back when Draco starts to shift. Eventually he falls back to sleep and I pull myself out of the bed. There's no going back after that nightmare and I walk over to the chair by the window and take a seat.

The hotel is one of the tallest buildings in the area and I can see the roofs of shops and homes nearby as the dawn breaks along the horizon... everything is a pale gray that makes me feel even more depressed than I already am.

My life feels like one big blob of gray area and the indifference I'm starting to feel towards it really scares me sometimes.

As I think about my life, everything from my childhood to now, I start scratching my thighs. I didn't wear pants to bed. Just one of Draco's well worn t-shirts and a pair of cotton knickers, so they're easily accessible to me.

I use my fingernails to scratch words into my skin.

Spells and curses and promises.

My mind starts thinking darker thoughts. I start thinking of the dead...

_Charlie... _

_Fred... _

_Percy... _

_Neville..._

_Remus... _

_Tonks... _

_Sirius... _

_Dumbledore... _

_McGonagall... _

_Sprout... _

_Slughorn... _

_Arbarax Malfoy... _

_Seamus Finnagin... _

_Dean Thomas... _

_Mad Eye Moody..._

_Lucius Malfoy... _

_Millicent Bulstrode... _

_Henry... faithful, perfect... Henry.. _

There are more... too many to count and I start clawing at my thighs as I think of them... Their faces floating in front of my mind, glaring down like they just couldn't believe that I had survived when so many good people had died.

I didn't deserve to live over any of them... I know that... and it makes me feel like hell.

Draco shifts on the bed again, so I glance his way. He's up and he's looking right at me.

"What are you doing?" he asks as he pulls himself to sit at the side of the bed with his feet flat against the floor. "You know I can't sleep when you're awake."

"I'm sorry," I whisper, not wanting to bother him anymore.

"Why are you up?"

I shrug and turn back to the window, running my fingers so hard against my thigh that I nearly break skin. I can hear him walk towards me, but I ignore it as I go back to my thoughts. As depressing and dark as they are. I scratch again and nearly wince when I glance down at the damage. It looks like I've been fighting with a very angry kitten.

"Stop that," Draco says sharply when he gets to me and he puts his hands on top of mine. "I don't want you to hurt yourself any more."

He's caught me doing this every morning and I know he's fed up.

I don't blame him.

"It doesn't hurt," I tell him because it's true. My memories hurt me far worse than any force I could inflict on myself.

He pulls the other chair up to mine until my knees are in between his legs.

"I can see the scratches," he says as he looks down at my legs, tracing one of the really red ones with his finger tip. "No more," he says seriously.

I don't respond. I just stare at him and he narrows his eyes before bending down and gently kissing the scratches. He wraps his hands under my knees and I put my hand on the back of his head, threading my fingers through his hair as he runs his lips over the tops of my thighs.

"Your skin is too beautiful for this," he says gently before pulling back and looking into my eyes with the light gray color of morning highlighting the sharp points on his face. "I wish I could make it so you weren't so depressed."

"I'm not depressed," I lie to make him feel better.

He gives me a little smile before pressing a kiss to my lips.

"Come to bed," he says as he stands and pulls me with him.

I follow him, like always, and we climb back into bed, taking our usual spots with him on the right by the door and me to the left by the window. I lay against him and stare at the wall as I rest my head on his shoulder.

I like listening to him breathe.

I put my hand on his chest until it's resting over his heart.

I like feeling that too.

He kisses the top of my head again and he falls back to sleep with little trouble.

He's tired... exhausted from his fights in the ministry and on the battle field. Losing his father had tossed up his plans and he's been working overtime to find a better solution. Lucius Malfoy's death was something he did not foresee, but he keeps going... he keeps doing what he wants for the end goal that will please him.

I pop my head up to stare at his profile.

I like the way he looks and I smile a little to myself as I greedily let my eyes trace the hills and valleys of his handsome face.

I can't resist touching him, so I bring my hand up and run my fingers over his nose and brow.

I envy Draco. He's done a lot of bad things... horrible things... but he's so solid with himself. He knows where he wants to go and what he wants to do... He knows exactly who he wants to be and who he is now...

I have no idea who I am anymore.

At the start of all of this, I was a Weasley, part of a large loving family who liked writing. That was about it. Now I've changed... I've evolved and was forced to move so far away from that... I don't even know who that is anymore. I don't know who I am or what I want to be in the future. I just know that I don't like where I've been or where I am now.

I wonder sometimes if I'll ever be happy again.

I think I could be happy with Draco. Just him and I forever in this room with nothing else but each other for the rest of our lives.

It seems better that way.

I like to think he's the best version of himself when he's with me and I'm... I... I just like being around him.

I try to go back to sleep... And I only seem to get a few minutes in before Draco's alarm goes off.

He gets up and I watch him with heavy lidded eyes as he disappears into the bathroom.

Richard Yaxley has taken up where his Lord had left off and whatever Death Eaters are still alive are following him tooth and nail to the bitter end. And it is the end. Voldemort's regime is all but destroyed but Yaxley has been able to hold Hogwarts as a fortress. Using little groups of his military to cause problems for those who are trying to build up our world again.

People like Draco and my family and the ever hopeful Harry Potter.

I listen to Draco take a shower as I push myself into the sitting position. I use the backboard to support myself as I grab the remote to turn on the television.

It's been decided that the safest place for me is in a muggle hotel, in a muggle town... with muggle technology.

I turn down the volume because I know Draco hates it and I pull the covers up as I watch a talk show... where a group of women gossip loudly about famous people... totally oblivious to the evil that had been coming for them in the form of Voldemort and his army.

When Draco's finished, he comes out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his hips and his hair disheveled. He looks really good and I send him a sly look as I follow the trail of hair on his stomach that leads down to...He makes a noise and my eyes snap to his, a blush staining my cheeks.

He sends one look to the t.v. before scowling, not having noticed how I just shamelessly ogled him.

"You're watching that fucking thing again," he says as he walks towards the... phone. I'm still learning the names of most things. My father has always loved muggle technology but I'm finding he was wrong about most of their uses.

He orders room service and then climbs into bed, leaving the towel on the ground as he shifts under the covers.

"Why do you keep watching this?" he asks as he grabs the remote to turn it off. "I can't stand that noise."

"I don't know," I admit as he rests against me, laying on his side with his body propped up by his elbow. I smile at his messy hair before leaning down to kiss him.

"You look really pretty today," he says after I pull back. I snort and then look towards the window.

The sun is just starting to shine along the horizon and the sky looks almost pink.

"I look like this every day," I tell him seriously.

"Well, then you must be pretty everyday."

"You are layering it on very thick," I tell him with a little smile as he reaches out to put his hand on my stomach.

He probably wants to have sex.

Draco_ always_ wants to have sex.

Sometimes I think he'll explode if he doesn't get it when he wants it and I oblige him every time because... because I want him just as much. It's easy enough to blame it on his libido because he's a man, but mine is just as needy if I was being completely honest with myself.

Everything about him turns me on. Especially now when everything is so sensitive. Now I find even his cruelty can get me hot and I would let that thought concern me if I could... but I can't... so every firm word, sharp look, painful grab, and smug smirk gets my knickers wet.

Sometimes when it happens, I realize that I am irreversibly broke.

Sometimes I care.

Most of the time I don't.

I can just be grateful that I fell for a Malfoy instead of a great guy like Harry Potter. Harry wouldn't understand me the way Draco does... Harry would treat me like a porcelain doll that could be broken with every turn. He would be so nice to me... too nice to me.. Maybe a part of me needs that, but it's not what I want.

I want Draco.

That's not saying Draco isn't nice to me. He is. He's perfect. In fact, he treats me better than anyone ever has... but he'll still snap at me if he thinks I'm being annoying and he can be stubborn when it comes to something he wants.

And he wants a lot of things.

One of them being me.

He's like Tom. I'm not blind to that, but his pro's far out weigh those cons. From when I was a young girl I think I was conditioned to want a man like him.

As messed up as that is, I think I finally see the situation clearly.

I watch his long fingers as he taps them against my sleep shirt, running up and down the roundness of my belly.

"Has he kicked?" he asks, for the millionth time this month and I shake my head.

Draco is fond of the baby.

I should feel lucky, the healer had told me, the baby that was growing inside of me was so strong.

I started crying and he thought they were tears of joy. To be honest, I had no idea what I was feeling at the time. The Dark Lord was dead, that was cause for celebration, but I still felt like there was a weight on my chest... some large boulder that refused to move.

The healer told me that there was a strong wizard forming in my womb like it would put me at ease. No one acted surprised when they found out I was pregnant. I guess I was the only one who didn't... couldn't... see it. No one seemed surprised when Draco said it was his either.

People just kept on hugging me and telling me things would be alright. I doubted it, but didn't say anything. Draco said that he didn't even want to have a paternity test after I told him what the Dark Lord said to me in the forest... he said that it didn't matter and I was too far along to do anything about it anyways.

When I questioned him about that further, not trusting him, he told me that I belonged to him... which meant that the child inside of me belonged to him as well. That was his reasoning and then he told me to shut up about it... in true Draco form. Saying something so sweet only to turn around and ruin it with a harsh demand.

I can't help but love him, though.

"How are you feeling?" he asks with his brows up as he leans down to press his lips to my stomach.

I put my hand in his hair, running my fingers through the wet strands. I think that he's convinced the baby's his... but I don't know... He keeps saying that the Dark Lord was not a true man and that it would be hard for him to conceive without a lot of magic and potions... Potions... it makes me think of the potion I took every morning at Riddle Manor.

I never told a soul about that.

"I'm feeling fine," I tell him seriously. "You worry too much," I add as he turns his head so he's facing me. "It's not like I'm in any danger here, right?"

He nods his head, sitting up so he can press his lips against mine. I hold him there with my hand on his neck, wanting to taste him. Then someone knocks on the door and Draco hops up, putting that towel back around his waist.

It's the room service and Draco tips the guy with muggle money after he rolls the cart in. I am hungry, but my eating habits are still not the best and I hesitate a second before Draco taps my knee.

"Eat," he orders and I inhale sharply before nodding my head.

I grab the plate of waffles right off and Draco laughs at me as I set it on my lap, dousing it in syrup from a fancy metal container.

"Hungry?" he asks as he pours himself some coffee.

"Famished," I say after taking the first bite and savoring it with my eyes closed.

He laughs again before handing me a glass of juice.

My juice to his coffee.

My waffles to his omelet.

Just little things like that make me feel so immature, but I try to shake off those thoughts as I eat the strawberries that are on the side of my plate.

As I eat, I try not to think of Riddle Manor and that horrible chair that would keep me locked in until I ate everything on my plate... I try not to think about Tom and the way he stared at me from across the table the night he killed Harry's relatives... I try not to think about the way his hand felt like ice as he danced it up my neck.. .I try not to think of how red his eyes looked when he was on top of me...

"Ginny," Draco says my name sharply and when I look to him, he raises a brow. "Eat," he repeats and I nod my head, going back to the waffles and strawberries with a little less vibrato than before.

I start thinking of my dream as the baby kicks inside of me and I pause a second with my hand over my stomach.

"Is he moving?" Draco asks softly, placing his hand over mine.

He takes a drink from his coffee when the baby kicks again and I move his hand to the right spot, finally letting him feel something he's been waiting to feel all week.

"Do you feel that?" I ask, giving him a tender smile because I know how much he likes it... a lot more than I do, apparently. I try to match his enthusiasm so I don't seem like the heartless one in the relationship. "It's like he's running a marathon," I joke and Draco gives me a warm smile like the thought pleased him. "It keeps me up at night sometimes," I admit, my voice dropping to a more somber level.

"I thought I was the only one who did that," his says as he wiggles his brows. I snort in laughter and he looks down at my stomach where his hand is still pressed against the baby.

He kicks again and Draco's eyes shine with something I can't readily place.

"Wild," he says with a little smile dancing on the corner of his lips.

_Wild... _

_Wild... _

_Wild... _

_Wild... _

_Wild..._

The skipping mobile from my dream makes me pause and I shake the thoughts away quickly with a violent turn of my head.

"What are you thinking?" Draco asks as he pulls his hand back. "Your mind was far away just now."

I lick my lips as I look into his concerned eyes and I grip my fork a little tighter.

"Half of me is afraid he's going to have scales and fangs," I admit softly, stabbing some more waffles with my fork. "Like a snake," I whisper shamefully as I think of the red eyed beast in my dream.

"I'm sure the healer would have noticed if you were giving birth to a reptile, Gin," he scolds me like I was being ridiculous and I know he's right, but I can't help it. "This is about your dream, isn't it?" he pulls the thought from my mind as he puts his mug down. "You're being silly about it."

"I don't think I'm being silly," I tell him flatly. "I just think..." I trail off, not sure of what I think.

"Stop thinking so much," he says seriously as he looks me over. "You over think everything. Things are fine. You've seen what he looks like yourself. Nothing out of the normal... no deformities."

He's right, of course, and I nod my head.

"Besides," he says with a sigh as he leans over to kiss my shoulder. "What if it isn't a snake you're dreaming about?" I give him a puzzled look, and he smiles. "What if it's a dragon?"

I match his smile and roll my eyes. "I think I would know the difference."

"Would you?" he asks as he takes my plate, putting it down on the serving tray before turning back to me. "Scales, fangs... snakes aren't the only creatures that have those."

"You're reaching," I tell him with a little smile and he laughs.

He grabs my chin and tilts my face towards his, giving me a deep kiss. He tastes like coffee and I wonder if I taste sweeter for him after the syrup and strawberries.

I hope I do. I want to be sweet for him.

"I was thinking," he says when he pulls back, tilting his head as he looks into my eyes. "When I come back, we'll go out."

"Go out?" I raise an eyebrow. We never go anywhere... not any more.

"Yeah," he says, giving me a charming smile. "Out."

"Out where?" I question and he silences me another kiss.

He puts a little more passion into it and then he pushes me down until I'm laying on my back...A position he seems to find me most pleasing, actually. He tangles his hand in my already messy hair and I make a very odd whining noise into his mouth when he does that thing... that thing with his tongue that drives me wild.

_Wild._

He takes my hand and pulls it towards his lap so I can feel his very obvious arousal...

"I don't know," I whisper as I pull my hand back, putting my forehead against his. My parents are right down the hall and I just... I'm so big now.

"You don't know what?" he asks.

His kisses go to my neck as he settles more on his side, leaving a trail of open mouthed kisses on my skin. Then he moves his hand to my breast where he squeezes gently, making my body come alive with want. He likes that they've gotten bigger, and he told me that was another pro I could add to the list.

Like_ that _mattered to me.

"I don't feel very well," I lie to him because I'm too far along and my body is too different to feel comfortable being intimate with him right now... and I haven't finished my plate.

I need to finish my plate.

It's a rule.

"Come on," he says with a little smile that turns me on because everything he does turns me on. "Don't be that way. Let me make you feel better."

"I feel fine," I say gently, teasingly, because we both know how this is going to end up.

"Well," he says with his lips against mine as he pushes up my shirt. "Let me make you feel better than fine."

He adds a kiss to my jaw and I lick my lips as he goes back to touching me with those clever fingers of his. He glances at me when my breath quickens and he smirks in victory... The sun is shining into his eyes, making them look like steel.

"Yes?" he asks, knowing very well what I'm going to say.

"Okay," I say softly, because I can't seem to deny him anything... not now... not anymore. I just feel like I owe him so much and it's a debt I'll never be able to repay.

He gives me another charming smile before kissing me heatedly. I let him pull off the t-shirt quickly and I roll to my side as he folds himself around me. It's harder now, that my stomach is so large, and we have to use different positions to make it work, but he never seems to care.

He doesn't mind at all.

I barely get any rest, actually.

He calls it making up for lost time, but I think he's just sad. He's sad over the death of his father and maybe he's even scared about the war. He's been through so many battles already and, with even more to be fought, there's a good chance that he could be hurt. People that he loves could die...

Die... just another name on my mental list.

His hand disappears under my knickers and I close my eyes when I feel his clever fingers doing things they seem to be made for doing. Sex is a comfort that we both use... an escape from what makes us miserable and he never says no to me... so I shouldn't say it to him... right?

I let him, even if I don't really want to or even if I'm too tired. I let him because I love him and it's what he wants...and no matter what I initially think, I always end up wanting it too. That seems to be a theme with me, anyways. Unsure and resistant at first until I give in and then towards the end I realize that I wanted it all along.

How messed up is that?

"Put your hand in my hair," he whispers against my ear as he slides into me. I reach over my shoulder, letting my fingers slide up his neck and into his hair.

It was really easy to convince my parents to let Draco and I share a room. I was already pregnant, after all, and they were giving into my every whim. It's because they feel bad for me... I can see it in their eyes every time they look my way and I can tell in the way their voice dips when they speak to me. I'm pitied by just about everyone but Draco and his friends... who still seem to think I'm ungrateful.

"Tell me you love me," he orders as he puts his hand on my thigh, opening my legs further.

"I love you," I whisper softly and I say it again when he sucks on my earlobe. "I love you so much," I end up whimpering because he was feeling too good and I know he likes to hear me say it.

He smiles against my cheek and adds a kiss as a reward.

Pansy had actually snapped at me yesterday for what she deemed my selfish disregard for everyone's feelings but my own. She didn't appreciate me toying with Zabini's feelings. She didn't appreciate me toying with Draco's. She called me selfish again and told me to grow up.

She told me to get with the program or 'get off the fucking boat'.

I just stared at her. I was eating a bag of chocolate covered peanuts and I just stared at her as they melted in my hands. Someone must have told her about my late night chats with Zabini... Honestly, it seemed like a lifetime ago, but it must have been a fresh wound in her memory because she just kept going... she just kept yelling at me.

Eventually I gave in... I told her I was sorry and I explained to her that Draco and I had already worked everything out. Things were fine, I told her. Draco was fine.

"Draco has been very forgiving with you," she cut me off quickly with a hand on her hip. She has a scar on her face now... a red one that runs down her cheek and it won't heal with magic. "A mercy he hasn't extended to the rest of us."

I didn't say anything to that, I just let the chocolate melt.

"I'm tired of hearing about this kind of stuff. You are driving a wedge between Draco and Blaise and that is a partnership that was formed long before you came into the picture," she snapped at me and I felt guilty... a feeling that seemed to be an every day occurrence now.

"You need to grow up," she repeated for the millionth time and I just let her scold me because what did I have to say about it? Nothing. I never have anything to say. "Stop playing the wounded farm girl and take one bloody moment to realize your actions affect others. Realize how lucky you are."

"I know-"

"You don't know," Pansy hissed. "Stop playing dumb. There are only so many times that can slide."

Her narrowed eyes flicked to my stomach as my face got hot.

"You don't have many options right now, Ginny," she said flatly. "Draco isn't going to let you leave him."

"I don't want to leave him," I replied, somewhere between hating her and wanting to hide from the conversation that I thought was unfair.

"Then act like it," she snapped as she walked towards the door. "You know, you aren't the only one with problems," she said with her hand on the door knob. "Get over yourself and stop acting so helpless. You owe him _everything_."

With that she left and I was too stunned to do anything. No one had talked to me like that since I had been back from Riddle Manor and it was hard to wrap my head around.

_Everything_.

I owe him everything.

I hate owing people.

Draco's movements become more insistent, so I shake out of my memories to focus on him and how his body feels against mine.

"Kiss me," he demands and I turn my neck, finding his lips and letting him slide his tongue along mine.

I take his bottom lip between my teeth and tug as I pull on his hair.

"Draco..." I whisper into the pillow. He presses his teeth down on my shoulder, but he doesn't bite me because he knows that I don't want that... not now anyways. "Say it," I whimper.

I need to hear it. I need to know it's him.

"I am Draco Malfoy," he says against my ear.

I can feel the smile on his face because he thinks this is silly, but he doesn't understand. He doesn't get why I need him to say it. I need to make sure he's not someone else.

There's a certain way, a proud way, that Draco says his name that tips me off.

I will not be fooled again.

"I am fucking Ginny Weasley," he laughs as he picks up his pace and I grab his hand. He kisses my neck. "I am Draco Malfoy," he whispers against my skin. "And I love you."

_Love. _

I know the Dark Lord can't say that word with the same kind of conviction. I turn my head and grab his hair to pull his lips to mine in a violent kiss.

That does it.

It only takes him a few more thrusts to be done and I press into him as he rides out his orgasm. He whispers a few cuss words as he holds me tightly before pulling out with a kiss against my neck. He rests his head against mine for a few moments before checking his watch and groaning.

"I have to go," he says quickly as he gets up and starts to pull on some clothes.

I watch him as I tug on one of his shirts to cover my nudity while he gets ready. His hair is a mess and I smile a little as he goes over to the mirror to comb it out.

"I like it when your hair is messy," I muse as I watch him try to tame the wild strands that are sticking up all over the place.

"Can't go around looking like Potter, now can I?" he jokes with a wink and I smile at him.

"I like Harry's hair," I say and he gives me a sharp look that I laugh at. "But I like yours better," I add for good measure.

"I should hope you do with the way you fucking play with it," he tells me flatly and I bite my lower lip to stop another giggle from escaping. "Besides, I'm pretty sure that his hair just grows in all stupid looking like that," he says as he looks back to me with a brow raised. "Mine only gets out of place when being tugged on by a beautiful girl."

I feel a pleased blush stain my cheeks and he stares at me.

"You always look so good after I've bedded you," he says wistfully and I give him a smile as I sit on the bed to braid my hair. "Maybe that's why I do it so often."

"Only because I let you," I tease him as he leans over the bed to place another gentle kiss against my lips.

I hold him there with my hand on his neck.

"Do you really have to go?" I ask softly, trying to pull him back into bed. I make him lay beside me and I run my nose along his. "Stay with me and cuddle," I say with a pout because I hate when he takes off after sex.

I feel like he gets his, so I should get what I want too.

He looks at his watch. "I don't know-"

I press a kiss to his lips to cut off his answer and I tangle a leg in his. "Just for a little while..." I whisper when he pulls back. I bite the corner of my lower lip and give him my best pleading look. "Please? Just keep me warm?"

I don't like being alone. I don't know who I am if I'm not with someone else... I mean... my thoughts get too dark... my mind goes to weird places if Draco's not there to bring me back.

He looks at his watch and then he nods quickly. I smile in victory when he gets comfortable again and I lay against him.

"I wish you didn't have to go," I pout against his chest. "I wish you could stay with me."

"I wish that too," he says, only half lying. "I enjoy your company much more."

"I can go with you," I offer as I drum my fingers against his chest.

He laughs and it rumbles against my ear. "I don't think so."

"Why not?" I ask, knowing perfectly well, but he humors me anyways as I creep my hand down his chest.

"Because," he says as he takes a strand of my hair. "Because your hair so incredibly bright that it would distract everybody and we don't want that, now do we?"

I smile and shake my head. "Not at all," I answer softly as I pop my head up to look at him. "Maybe I should dye my hair black."

"No," he says as he kisses my forehead. "I like your bright hair. It makes you easier to spot in a crowd."

I laugh again and then my hand disappears under the waist band of his pressed gray slacks. He arches his back when I find him under his boxers and I bite the corner of my lip, hiding a smile...

"What are _you _doing?" he asks with a hand on my wrist.

"Sh," I say as I start moving my hand and I think he's going to stop me for a moment, but he uses his left hand to unbuckle his belt.

I smirk in triumph as I sit up and help him.

"I'm going to be late," he scolds as our fingers fumble around each other to unzip his pants.

"But you're doing nothing to stop it."

"Of course not," he whispers. "Do you think I'm an idiot?"

"No," I say seriously as I straddle his waist. "I think you're sexy."

He laughs and so do I because I can't believe that left my mouth. I bring my hand up to cover my loud laugh and then I smile down at him as I bite the corner of my lip.

"If there was a reality where I could just fuck you all day, I think that would be heaven," he says as he gives me his best smug smile with his hands on my hips.

"We could do that," I say gently as I bend down as much as my stomach will allow to place a lingering kiss on his lips. "Just stay in this hotel room forever," I whisper as I pull back. "Where real life worries don't exist."

"I doubt you'd want to be around me that much," he jokes. I finally stop teasing him and I actually lower myself down onto his waiting body. "I'm kind of a bastard."

"That's half the reason why I love you," I admit to him as I reach under his shirt to feel his warm chest.

"What's the other half?" he asks with a brow raised and his cheeks start to heat from my movements. "My big co-"

I cover his mouth with my hand before he can finish that sentence and laugh at the indignant look me gives me.

"You have such a dirty mouth," I chastise.

I let that hand slide down to his hair when my movements get too involved and I can't talk anymore. He puts his hand on face and then he runs his thumb over my lips, smirking, as he looks at me with darkened eyes.

I love it when he looks at me like that... Like I'm the only person in the world.

I hold his gaze for as long as possible before clenching my eyes shut and turning away. It's building too quickly... I'm going too fast. I'm going to be done soon. I don't want him to leave just yet so I slow my movements down and I use his chest as leverage as I gently roll my hips against his.

I know he hates it. Draco always likes it hard and fast... Even though he'll humor me sometimes and be loving about it, I know his best orgasms come with speed and little a bit of pain.

"Harder," he says with his fingers digging into my skin. "You know you're going too fucking slow."

I stop moving all together and look down at him with an eyebrow raised, almost taking pleasure in his frustration.

"Move," he snaps.

I know he's close. He jerks his hips up and I gasp at the feeling, my body already so close to the edge.

"No," I say with labored breaths as I push the bangs out of my face. "Say please," I taunt and he narrows his eyes.

"You're aware that I could just throw you into whatever position I want," he snaps as he thrusts up again, making me clench my eyes shut. "I'm a lot bigger than you are."

"Not that much bigger," I tell him with a little smile curling at the corner of my mouth. "Say please," I say as I move up and down only once to prolong his torture.

"Trying to get me to beg," he nearly laughs as sweat gathers on his brow. "Does that turn you on now?"

"Maybe you looking so pissed off while you say it does," I say with a smile as I move my hips again, only to have him moan and arch his back.

"Please," he says through clenched teeth when I refuse to move for the fifth time. I grin down at him and he glares.

"What was that?"

"I said please, goddamnit," he snaps and I snort in laughter before I actually start moving again because if I test him anymore, I know he really will throw me into a different position.

He's done it before.

"You need to work on your pleading skills if you want this relationship to work," I tease as I use his chest as leverage to move hard and fast like he likes.

"Stop talking," he hisses and I laugh again.

When we're both finished and a sweating mess, I rest beside him with my breath coming out in short gasps.

"I was going to say conscious, you know," he smiles at the ceiling with his hand propped up behind his head. "That's what I was going to say before you covered my mouth. My big conscious."

"No, you weren't," I smirk when he turns to kiss me. "You were going to say cock."

"I _like_ the way you say that word," he says with a pleased grin. I make a face at his obvious pleasure as he looks down at me with fond eyes. "Look who has the filthy mouth now."

He kisses me again and then he checks his watch.

"I really have to go now," he says with a long sigh.

"Okay." I nod head before he places a very sweet and very gentle kiss against my lips. "I'll allow it," I add for good measure and he bops my nose with his finger before standing straight.

"Be good," he says quickly, throwing on a pair loafers...using a shoe horn like an old man because he obsessively takes care of his footwear.

I watch him walk to the door while tucking in his shirt and I hide a secret smile because his hair... his hair is impossibly messy now. It's sticking up in the back and a few places in the front like he had a rather impressive cowlick. I smile at him because if he saw his reflection, he'd probably stop all he was doing to comb it out again.

"Don't watch too much of that thing," he says, pointing to the television as I try not to laugh at how adorable his hair looks. "Those muggles will rot your brain."

I nod my head, knowing I'm not going to listen to him. He gives me another sharp look as he buckles his belt.

"I'm serious, Gin."

"I know you are," I reply with a teasing smile.

That earns me another terrible look that I laugh at.

When he goes to open the door, Hermione is standing on the other side with her hand up like she was about ready to knock. I scramble to put on a pair of sweat pants and now it's Draco's turn to laugh as he hears me fumble behind him.

"Hey, Draco," she says tersely, saying his first name as a way to make peace.

He looks at me and raises his brows.

"Let her in," I whisper as Hermione's cheeks blush at his obvious disdain for her.

There's a moments pause before Draco steps aside, not saying one word in greeting.

I make a face at his back for being so rude, but I let it fall quickly as I try to adjust the pants.

"I'll be gone about six hours," Draco tells me and I nod my head, trying to act like I had pants on the whole time. "Be ready when I come back."

"I will, babe," I tell him with a little smile and once the door closes, I look at Hermione. She has a book in her hand and a very affronted look on her face. "What are you doing here?" I ask with a little blush on my cheeks as I tug on my shirt.

I am pleased that I won't be on my own. I try to show it by smiling sweetly, ignoring the stupid pants and how uncomfortable they make me feel. I think I put them on backwards because I feel the tag digging into my tummy... but it's too late to fix it now.

"Just thought I'd say hi," she says as I find the remote to turn the t.v. back on. To hell with whatever Draco has to say on the matter. "I still don't like the way he speaks to you," she says, nodding to the door as she cradles that book to her chest.

"What are you talking about?" I ask with a frown as I start flicking through all the colorful channels.

"Malfoy just orders you around. He never asks you nicely like a normal person. He just barks demands."

"No, he doesn't," I say in defense before I realize that Draco does seem to come across that way... especially around Hermione. "He can be sweet," I add honestly as I remember how good he was this morning. "You don't see him the way I do," I admit.

She makes a face that she thinks I can't see, but I do.

I look towards the serving tray where my half eaten breakfast is and I reach for it. Hermione sees my struggle and she grabs the plate for me, handing it to me after I say thank you.

"That's just the way he talks," I say with a shrug as she takes a seat beside me on the bed.

She probably wouldn't want to sit there if she knew what Draco and I just did in that spot not too long ago.

I bet she'd make all kinds of faces then.

"Well, I don't like it," she says.

I stand up with my plate to sit at the small table in the corner. Without Draco here to coach me through it, I don't feel comfortable sitting anywhere else. I take a seat and pause a second before digging my fork into the waffle.

"He's not like Ron," I admit because I've heard the way Ron speaks to Hermione now that they're officially together. He's so nice and fumbling with his lines... Draco's never that way. "He just doesn't talk like that. He's not being rude... I just think he doesn't know how to be any way else. He's a good guy."

"Trust me," she says seriously. "Half the time he's just being rude."

"That means the other half of the time he isn't," I counter and she purses her lips.

She doesn't say anything for a few moments as I eat and watch t.v. When I offer her a bite from my plate, she declines with her hand up.

"I wanted to talk to you," she says and I glance at her after taking a drink from my juice.

"Yeah?" I say nervously because that never ends well for me.

"Yeah," she nods her head and then looks at the t.v. where I've stopped on a channel that plays music videos all day long. "I overheard you talking to Parkinson the other day," she says.

My cheeks heat and I push my plate away because I know what conversation she heard.

"What was that all about?" she questions softly and I think a moment before replying.

"It was nothing," I lie with a shrug as I take another bite of waffles even though I'm not hungry any more. "She was just upset with me... it was stupid."

"She shouldn't talk to you like that," Hermione says and when I glance at her, she has a frown on her face. She stands up, leaving the book on my bed to sit in front of me, successfully blocking the view of the television. "No one should talk to you like that," she adds.

I don't say anything for a few moments as I construct a reply and I lick my lips before looking at her.

"She was just mad at me," I decide on saying. It was true, Pansy was angry with me and I can't say I blame her. What I was doing with Zabini wasn't fair to her either because I knew how she felt about him. "That's all."

Hermione stares at me, not saying a word.

"It's nothing," I shrug to fill the silence. "Everything is fine now."

She looks me over, studying my face as I look back at the t.v., craning my neck to see around her bushy hair

"You know you don't owe Malfoy anything, right?" she says and I glance at her. "I mean, you don't owe anyone anything. That was a terrible thing for her to say and you can leave him if you want."

"I don't want that," I say tightly and she nods.

"But you do know that you don't have to be with him if you don't want to, right? You know that?" she asks softly and I nod my head. "No matter how much you think you owe him or... you know, that..." she adds, motioning to my stomach. "You don't have to be with someone you don't want to be with."

"I'm not stupid, Hermione," I tell her as I stand up and walk over to the window, crossing my arms as I stare at the muggle city below.

"I didn't say that," she says and then she sighs. "You know, I never felt okay with the way that he courted you."

"What?" I ask more sharply than I should, but she doesn't catch it.

"He was just all over you all of sudden and his friends... it was like they were courting you too, constantly pushing you in his direction. It was weird."

I don't say anything.

"If I would have known that your parents couldn't get you out of school, I would have made you come with us when we left," she says as I remember that night. How the ministry fell and they had to run. "I shouldn't have left you with them. It was always them against you. You never had a chance..."

"I love Draco," I tell her firmly.

"You know, just because he doesn't hit you..." she trails off when I give her a sharp look and she retracts quickly. "I mean, abuse takes many different forms."

I roll my eyes and turn away. "Draco isn't abusive."

"By your definition," she replies and then she shakes her head again. "Love is a partnership, not a dictatorship. A lot of people can't tell the difference until it's too late and I fear from what I've seen... what I've heard..."

"Stop," I hiss, my voice taking a very dark tone that surprises her because she snaps her mouth shut quickly. "I don't know why you're saying such ugly things to me. It was Draco who helped you out of the castle that night. If it wasn't for him, you three would probably be dead."

"And do I owe him anything for that? Do I owe him something for being a decent person?" she asks as she stands up to approach me. "You're not stupid, Ginny. You're not stupid. You're not helpless. You're brave and those people... people like Pansy... they don't give you enough credit. She said you were lucky? You've been through so much. No one should talk to you like that. The Ginny I knew would have probably pulled out her wand and hexed Parkinson for saying such a thing!"

I look at her with a frown on my face. Her eyes are a darker brown than mine and I stare at her for a few moments before turning away and shaking my head.

"I'm an awful person, Hermione," I tell her as I look outside. "I've been a terrible girlfriend to Draco... a terrible friend... a terrible daughter... a terrible sister..."

I trail off as I think of all the bad things I've done.

"I hurt everyone who loves me. Pansy is right. I am selfish and ungrateful and weak and foolish. Everything bad that's happened to me, happened because my decisions have been stupid. I never think before I act. I never think of who I'm going to hurt or what's going to happen. I just do the first thing that comes into my head like a... like a child... and I never know the right thing to do. I'm not like you."

I can see her furrow her brow and shake her head.

"I'm not like you," I repeat. "I'm not clever or strong. I'm just... I don't know..." I put my hand on my forehead and clench my eyes shut. "I'm even whining right now," I say in disgust as I think of Tom and how often he scolded me for it.

There's another long silence. I start chewing on my finger nails as she stares at me.

"I think the worst thing that came out of all of this was that people made you feel this way," she says as she reaches out to touch my arm.

I don't say anything.

Then she hugs me.

She hugs me as tight as my stomach will allow and I tense for a few uncomfortable moments before wrapping my arms around her too. I feel almost desperate as I cling to her. It was pathetic really, how emotional I was getting over one little embrace. I missed Hermione. Even though I had always felt like she was just my friend because of Ron and Harry... I don't care about that right now.

I miss her.

When she finally pulls back, my eyes are wet.

"You're brave, Ginny. You're brave and you're strong and you're so good." she swallowed hard. "If I had been through what you'd been through... isolated... with the Dark Lord... I wouldn't be half as okay as you are. You don't give yourself enough credit. And... maybe it would be a good idea to kind of take a break from Draco for a little while," she says and and I shoot her a look. "I mean... if you want."

I don't want to talk about it anymore, so I turn away.

"What book are you reading?" I ask as I go to the bed t pick it up.

_Gods, Myths, and Folklore from around the world_ is the title and I turn it in my hand to read the back as she stares at me.

"Is it any good?" I add as I flip the pages, trying to lead her away from the prior conversation. "I haven't read anything in such a long time."

"You can borrow it," she says softly, walking towards me until I'm forced to look at her again. "It's kind of interesting."

I nod and let a silence fall between us, hoping she won't bring up anything uncomfortable.

"What's that like?" she asks and when I give her a curious look, she nods at my stomach.

"Oh..." I trail off and put my hand there. "Uncomfortable mostly," I admit because it was true.

I haven't really felt very bonded with him yet... I think a part of me is afraid to just in case he comes out with red eyes and looking like Tom Riddle. I feel like a terrible person for it, but Draco seems to be looking forward to parenthood a lot more than me.

I'm scared to death.

"Do you think Malfoy will be a good father?" she asks, still looking at my stomach.

"I know he will," I say without hesitation and she looks at my face again, giving me tight smile.

"I hope so," she says and before I can reply, she smiles. "I know you're going to be a great mother."

"I hope so," I mutter and then I give her a fake sunny smile. "Let's talk about something else... or better yet..." I go back to the remote and point it at the t.v. "Let's watch a movie."

The conversation stays in lighter waters as she sits and watches some muggle movie with me. After an hour into it, she looks at the clock.

"I have to get going," she says as she stands up and rights her clothes. "I have to go to the ministry... they're having some kind of walk through of the war," she says with an eye roll. "So that old men who didn't fight can get the story straight. Do you want to come?" she asks after a seconds pause. "I mean, I'm sure what you would have to say would be invaluable."

Thinking about even talking about my time with Tom Riddle makes my skin crawl and I shake my head as I look back at the television.

She nods. "Alright, well, I'll see you later."

"Bye," I say with out looking away from the screen.

With that she leaves, and I'm okay for another hour or so... but then my thoughts start to twist... my memories start playing back every bad thing that happened to me. The Dark Lord with his red eyes and cruel smirk are at the forefront of my mind and I stare at the television, seeing nothing at all but the nightmares in my head.

_Do you hear that? _

Tom's voice slithers into my ears.

_A steady heartbeat._

I put my hand on my stomach and glance down at the baby.

_One so strong it could bring me back from the poison you slipped in my drink._

What else could he bring him back from? The final death? Could he do that? Could I risk that?

I get up to use the rest room as the thoughts spin and twist in my head. I stare at myself and my new body in the mirror for a while, turning to the side and running my hand along my middle before sighing loudly.

I honestly don't know how to feel about it and all these dreams are messing up my mind.

I dig into one of the drawers under the sink and when I find my hidden bag towards the back, I pull it out quickly. I sit on the ledge of the bath tub and take out the small blue vial with the golden label... a potion that Ruth Davenport gave me.

_You should never have a child you don't want. _

I hold it up to the light as I remember her words.

_It's a chain that will bind you forever. _

Is that what I want?

I put a hand over my belly and then read the instructions on the back.

It will kill a pregnancy at any term... Just down the whole bottle in one sitting and it will be terminated.

_There might be blood. _

I know I shouldn't... I know it's wrong. I know it's not fair...

I just keep thinking of the snake in the nursery... and Tom... and the rapes... and no matter how sweet Draco can be... those thoughts refuse to go away.

I uncork the top and sniff it.

It smells like flowers and soap.

Of course, there's a flip side to my thoughts.

For each snake, I think of a beautiful little baby like Victorie. My brother's little girl seems to be one of the only rays of light in this deary world. She's so sweet... so innocent.

I rub my stomach again.

For each thought of Tom, I think of Draco when he's at his best.

For each violent memory, there's a thought about the future... where Draco and I are a family, living in a perfect house, in a perfect world, with a perfect child.

_Where the world is perfect as it should be._

All those sunny thoughts quickly fade in the darkness of my mind... I had been through too much to ever be normal again and I can't see myself being that happy ever again. Not really... not like before... never again.

I bring the vial up to my lips and I pause for a second.

What do I really want in this situation?

I'm not ready to be a parent to anyone. I'm not even good at caring for myself let alone someone else... and what if he's evil? What if he brings the Dark Lord back... What if he's like Tom and I... I pull the vial away from my lips and press my palm to my forehead.

I hate that life is not easy.

That things are not clearly black and white... that there isn't a heavenly force that can come down and tell me the right thing to do.

I probably wouldn't even believe it if that happened. I'm too dense to realize a good thing.

Is Draco a good thing?

_Is this a good thing? _I ask myself as I rub my stomach again.

I think of Draco, with his handsome smile and his lips pressed against my stomach... I think of the little kicks I've started to feel as the baby moves around. I stare at the vial again. It's white knuckled in my left hand and burning a hole into my skin.

What would I tell people?

That I had a miscarriage?

They were all surprised that the baby was so healthy after the battle at Shell Cottage... There was blood... too much blood to be believed and they all just assumed he was dead. But there was a heart beat... I could hear it in my head as I slept.

I can hear it now... thump, thump, thumping against my mind like a well oiled machine.

What would Draco say to me right now? Of course he would talk me out of it. He thinks that the baby's his anyways and I'm sure he'd snap at me. Question me why I'd want to get rid of something that we made.

He'd be surprise, I'm sure, that the thought even crossed my mind.

Maybe he'd even be angry with me. He'd probably take the vial away and scold me for being selfish.

_Selfish._

I am being selfish. I'm always selfish.

I can't do it.

Before I change my mind, I stand up and pour the potion down the toilet. I watch as the black liquid flushes down and I start biting my nails until it's all gone with something heavy settling on my chest.

I look at the empty vial and then throw it away before leaving the bathroom.

I feel like this is the right thing to do. Right? Why do I feel so awful about it?

I go back to the couch to watch another movie on the telly as I curl myself into the cushions... trying to get comfortable with my hand on my stomach. When he kicks a few times, I know that I made the right choice even if it was wrong.

I immerse myself in the fiction playing on the screen and for a blissful while I can forget about my awful life and just relax. When Draco finally comes back, I'm still stationed in front of the television, watching the final scene of some epic three hour drama with a cover bunched around me like a cocoon.

"Gin," he snaps at me, clearly irritated and when I look at him, I feel my cheeks blush. "Come on."

"I'm sorry," I whisper before turning back to the show. It's over now and the credits are rolling. "I lost track of time," I say, fighting with the cover to get up so I can take a shower and ignore what I almost did.

I almost ended something that barely had a chance to begin and I feel incredibly horrible about it.

"Just give me a few minutes."

Before I get to the bathroom, he grabs my arm. I flinch, thinking he's going to yell at me, but instead he leans down to press a kiss to my lips.

"Hurry," he sighs.

I nod my head, blushing at my over reaction and the embarrassing pulse that went between my legs.

"What should I wear?" I ask him before going into the wash room.

"Clothes," he says with a smirk, thinking he's clever.

I take a quick shower and dress for the day in one of the only outfits that fit. An oversized green shirt and stretchy leggings. I am very aware of Draco's presence as I brush through my hair and put on some make-up in front of the mirror by the bed. He's changed out of the dark clothes he left with this morning, wearing an altogether lighter outfit.

"You're dressed really nicely," I point out, frowning as I pull my hair up into a high pony tail.

He looks down at his outfit and shrugs. He always dresses nicely, of course. He's a Malfoy after all, but today he just looked so polished and clean. He favored darker colors and well pressed slacks, but he was wearing shorts today... Khaki, well tailored shorts that go down to his knees with a steel blue dress shirt tucked in. His sunglasses are hooked into the front pocket of his shirt and he has brown leather deck shoes on his feet.

He looks like he just stepped off of a very expensive boat.

I look down at my own outfit... there's a stain on my chest and I frown as I try to rub it out after I lick my thumb.

I can see Draco moving from the corner of my eyes. When he sits on the bed to watch me with his ankle on his knee, I glance at him.

He's smiling.

"What?" I ask stupidly before going back to the freaking stain, trying to rub it out so hard that my thumb starts burning.

"You're cute," he says and I frown at him.

Then he pulls out a straw fedora, placing it cock-eyed on his head as he grabs the book Hermione let me borrow. He starts flicking through it with his brows up like he was bored before finding something of interest and settling back to read it. I look at him with a scowl on my face as he scratches his neck, his silver watch catching the light from the window.

"Are you wearing the hat too?" I ask in whine and he cocks his eyebrow at me.

"What's wrong with the hat?" he asks and I shake my head.

"You always look so good and cool," I snap as I go back to the wardrobe where my clothes are hanging... "It's not fair," I mutter so he won't hear.

"Cool?" I can hear the joke in his voice as I sort through the clothes I was able to keep from my many moves. "You think I look cool?"

"You _know_ you look cool," I hiss at him as I find a pretty dress that was stuffed at the bottom of the wardrobe.

It's white and has thin blue stripes on it.

It will do.

It's wrinkly and had fallen off the hanger some time ago, but I pull it out anyways because it's the only half way decent thing that has survived.

"It's hard to be this suave, Ginny," he says. He comes up behind me as I pull off the ugly t-shirt. "What you were wearing was fine," he says gently as I stuff myself into the dress that's a little too tight.

"It had a stain on it," I snap at him as I pull up the thick straps over my shoulders. "And I can't go anywhere with you if you're looking like... like that," I say, waving a hand in his well dressed direction.

He wants to laugh at me, but he hides his smile.

I huff and puff as I work my into it and then I glance at Draco. "Will you zip this for me?" I ask as I move my hair out of the way and face the wardrobe.

He starts, and then hesitates when the zipper is half way up. "I'm not sure if this is going to zip," he says seriously.

I inhale deeply and try to suck in as much as I can. "It will zip," I snap as I try to hold in my stomach.

"I don't want you to be uncomfortable."

"I'm uncomfortable anyways," I tell him sharply. "Just zip it."

I can practically feel his glare on the back of my neck as he struggles to zip up the rest of the dress. Once it's finally done, I exhale the breath I was holding and pause a second, putting my hand on my protruding stomach and rubbing thoughtfully for a moment before shaking my head and reaching under the skirt of the dress to take off the leggings.

"This is turning into an all day fucking affair," Draco chimes in as I throw the leggings to the side.

I spare him a little look before he sits back down on the bed and picks up the book again.

I don't actually know why I'm so angry about this. Maybe because it makes me thinks of an old conversation I had with Pansy Parkinson on the train to Hogwarts. I want to look like I belong with him, don't I? Not that I'm just some country girl who's pregnant in a stained shirt next to his polished perfection.

"Where are we going anyways?" I ask as I grab a pair of shorts.

"Nowhere that should take this damn long to get ready for."

"Stop being hateful," I say as I shimmy the tight black shorts, hiding them under my dress.

He grabs a pen and writes something down in the book.

"That book belongs to Hermione," I tell him as he blows on the ink before snapping the book closed. "She only let me borrow it."

"All the more reason to vandalize it," he says, looking up as I adjust the shorts. "What's with the fucking shorts?" he snaps. "I don't have all day."

"If we're walking anywhere, I need to wear them because my thighs rub together and it's really, really hot outside!"

He sighs loudly and I can feel his temper rising as I pull my hair out of the ponytail.

I go back to the mirror to brush it out, but he beats me to it, grabbing my arm and glaring down at me.

"You look fine now," he says in sharp voice telling me he doesn't really care either fucking way. "We're going."

I nod my head and let him take my hand, practically dragging me out of the room. There's something sad about a pregnant teenager and all the muggles who work at the hotel keep giving me really depressing looks as I keep my head down, staring at the silver ballet flats I picked out. I think they actually belong to Daphne and they're a little too long for me but they go with the outfit.

Draco doesn't seem to care, he just puts his sunglasses on when we reach the lobby and I have to jog to keep up with his large strides. When we're going down a set of stairs, one of my flats fall off and I stumble.

Draco catches me and he grabs my shoe impatiently, kneeling in front of me and offering it to me so I can slide my foot in like Cinderella. I blush at the people looking at us as I stuff my foot into the flat with out much grace.

"This shoe doesn't fit you," he points out.

I feel my lower lip tremble before I cut off that emotional wave. No more of that.

"Nothing fits me," I mumble and when he looks at me, he doesn't look half as angry as before.

When we get outside, Draco says we have to go to the garage so I figure a car's going to be involved. I nod and let him take my hand, already sweating from the freaking heat. I feel like a stuffed ham or something equally as unattractive in this dress and shoes. I won't complain, though, because I don't want Draco to pop a blood vessel. I already know I've tried his patience too much today.

A Malfoy can only be spread so thin.

When we walk towards the black car with tinted windows, Draco takes out his keys and unlocks it as I stare at the ground, feeling uncomfortable.

"Here," he says as comes towards me and makes me turn around. "I didn't tie this properly," he says gently. There's a thick blue ribbon that runs right under my breasts on the dress and it's supposed to be tied in a ribbon on the back.

I guess I forgot about it, and when Draco's is finished tying it, he turns me around and kisses my forehead.

"I don't want you to be so unhappy," he says when he pulls back, tilting my chin up with his finger. "You look very pretty," he says to stroke my ego and I appreciate it even though it makes me feel like I'm a bratty little child. "Like a little doll," he muses as he presses a kiss to my lips.

He puts his hand on my stomach quickly before kissing me again. Then he takes off that very trendy hat and places it on my head.

"There," he says. He pushes it down over my ears so it's covering my eyes. "Now you're just as cool as me."

I laugh a little and push it up. "I doubt that's possible."

"True," he says with a smug smile before opening the car door for me. "But you can try." He motions to the seat and nods his head. "In," he orders. "It's fucking hot."

I give him a look for cussing and then I slide into the seat. He leans over me to help put on my seat belt like I was a child. "I think I can handle that," I whisper as he clicks it into place.

"No, you can't," he says, placing a kiss on my lips, staying there a little longer than necessary. When he pulls back, his sunglasses slide down his nose, revealing his silver eyes. He smiles as he looks over my face. "I bet you were a beautiful baby."

My face pales.

"W-What?" I stutter and he smirks before pulling back and shutting the door.

I start replaying my dream in my mind. That awful dream with that awful song...

I'm still reeling from it when he hops into his seat and I shake my head when he asks me if I'm alright.

"I'm fine," I say, giving him an uncomfortable smile. "Will you tell me where we're going now?" I ask once I clear my throat. "You know I don't like these muggle cars."

"It's a surprise," he says with his brows up as he starts the car.

"What kind of a surprise?"

"A good kind," he replies shortly as he cranes his neck to look behind him with his hand on the back of my head rest.

"Is there such a thing?" I ask as he moves the steering wheel around and around...

"We shall see, won't we?" he says gently, distracted as he tries to drive the car from the garage. "So stop asking."

I push the hat up because it's getting into my eyes and then I take it off totally so I can look at the band on the inside. It has some french tag I can't read and I finger it as Draco keeps driving.

"Where did you get this?" I ask because I've never seen him wear a hat before and I doubt he's gone shopping recently.

The thought is just silly.

"It was my father's," he says before putting his hand on my thigh.

Oh.

I put it back on and stare out the window.

Draco has rarely spoken about his father's death. There was a memorial for him and all the others who died at Shell Cottage a couple weeks ago. It turned into a memorial for every person who was lost during the war and it was the saddest thing I've ever sat through.

Everyone cried.

Everyone but Draco and Narcissa Malfoy who stayed stone still with their sunglasses on at the edge of the grounds with their icy expressions being commented on by everyone.

I leaned on Draco most of the day, and I overheard Mrs. Malfoy hiss that she couldn't stand that her husband had been lumped in with the others. That he had died for this pathetic cause...

Draco took her inside after that and I didn't see them the rest of the day.

When Draco found me later that night, he was drunk.

So drunk he was falling down and I ran to catch him before he slammed into one of the dressers.

"What are you doing?" I had asked him, squinting against the light he had turned on when he stumbled into the hotel room.

He reeked of firewhisky... and smoke... and another suspicious smell that wasn't pleasant. There was vomit on his shirt and when I realized what it was, I cringed.

When he tried to kiss me, I pushed him back.

He glared, his eyes glassy and red rimmed.

"Don't do that," he snapped as I backed away from him. "Come the fuck back here."

I had never seen Draco drunk before and he was almost belligerent.

He tripped again when he tried to make a grab for me and then he slumped against the wall, clenching his eyes shut.

"Where have you been?" I asked him with my arms crossed over my breasts.

"Out," he snapped, like my voice hurt his ears.

"Obviously," I whispered and he turned his face more towards the wall with his forehead pressed against it.

I started to feel guilty and it made me remember the first time I had drank... how I threw up and how he took care of me.

"Here," I walked towards him and started to unbutton his shirt. "Come on. Let's get you out of these clothes."

"Yes, please," he said with a little smirk on his face. "You should get undressed too."

I rolled my eyes and he let me take off his shirt. I crinkled my nose at the puke on the fabric as I bunched it up and threw it in the bathroom. Draco then proceeded to fall face first into the bed and for the first time ever I saw the toll that this year had placed on him. He looked just like an eighteen year old should... a little lost and not in control of anything... he looked so very young that it was heartbreaking.

I had never actually seen him so out of it and I hesitated a moment before going towards him and pulling off his shoes.

He mumbled something into the pillow and then turned on his back with his arm over his eyes when I threw his loafers on the floor.

"I'm just going to take off your belt," I whispered, not wanting him to be uncomfortable. "Then you can sleep."

"I don't want to sleep," he said... he almost whined... as I leaned over him to undo the buckle of his black leather belt.

He opened his eyes and stared at me as I pulled it through each of the loops.

"Are you feeling alright?" I asked softly because he just kept on staring at me. I paused a second to look into his eyes. "Do you think you'll be sick again?"

"I didn't get sick," he said and I glanced at him before rolling his belt up and putting it on the ground by the shoes.

"I think you might have, honey," I said softly. I was sounding and acting really motherly to him and it was kind of strange considering he was usually the one in control of things.

"Honey?" he snorted at the endearment I had never called him and he sighed loudly.

"You had a lot to drink," I pointed out.

I couldn't fault him for it. Even though I was kind of hurt that he just left and got drunk with out telling me... I understood. I didn't want to be bitchy about it and I tried to resist asking him a million questions about where he had been and what he had been doing. I stood up to get him a glass of water and he grabbed my wrist.

"I did," he nodded his head and struggled to sit up. "Sit down," he said, tugging on my arm sharply.

I took a seat beside him as he rested against the head board. I ran my hand over his brow, brushing his hair away from his forehead.

His cheeks were flushed from the alcohol and his hair was disheveled.

He looked like a boy.

"Where did you go?" I asked softly as he grabbed my hand and pressed his lips against my palm.

"Nowhere," he admitted bitterly. He brought my hand to his lap and he started fingering the bracelet he had given me. "Everywhere. I don't know."

He finished that sentence with a shrug and I frowned.

"Are you alright?" I whispered as I watched him study my hand like it was the most fascinating thing in the world.

"I'm fine," he snapped at me and I flinched a little at the venom in his voice. "Don't ask me that question again."

I tugged my hand back. "Don't snap at me like that," I told him seriously, but it didn't really seem to faze him because he just narrowed his.

"Are you mine, Ginny?" he asked and I rolled my eyes.

"Of course I am," I answered with a head shake because he was being ridiculous.

He sat up a bit straighter and scooted towards me. He folded himself around my body with his hand dancing up my middle, finally resting on the baby bump that was forming.

"I don't regret things," he said in a harsh whisper as he ran his lips over my jaw. "I never regret things... If I did, I think it would have a domino effect and then I would never want to get out of bed."

I put my hand over his to calm him and then I turned my face towards his to kiss his cheek.

"Do you regret things?" he asked me softly, looking into my eyes. "Do you regret loving me?"

"Of course not," I told him seriously as I brought my hand up to rest on his face. "I would never regret that."

"Maybe you should, Ginny," he said darkly. "You're stuck with me for life. Do you realize that?"

I furrowed my brows because he eyes were starting to look a little too dark... a little too wild.

_Wild..._

"If you ever left me, I would find you and bring you back," he snapped at me like he was angry. "If you tried to hide from me, I would find you. If you left me for someone else, I would kill them." I opened my mouth to respond to his horrible drunk ramblings, but he beat me to it. "I know I should probably let you go. Tell you that you'd be better off without me... that I love you enough to realize I'm not good for you. Well, fuck that."

My eyebrows shot up in surprise as he glared at me.

"I am not that kind of guy. I love you and I have you... and I'll continue to have you no matter what."

He paused for a second as he licked his lips and pulled away from me.

"I feel bad for you sometimes," he said seriously. "You deserve better than me, but that doesn't mean I'm fucking going anywhere."

I didn't really know what to say to him. I knew he was just drunk talking, but his subject matter was troubling. He sighed loudly after a few moments and then tugged on my arm as he sat back.

"Sit on my lap," he ordered as he pulled me towards him.

I did as he said and once I was in place with my feet dangling above the floor, he put his head in the crook of my neck and inhaled a long breath as he wrapped his arms around me. I kissed his head and threaded my fingers through his soft blond hair. He didn't say anything and we sat like that in silence as I held him to me.

"I am _so_ drunk," he finally said after about an hour of just sitting in silence and I couldn't help but laugh.

"Just a bit," I answered when he finally lifted his head from my neck. I pressed my lips to his and he rested his forehead against mine.

"If you can think that way..." I trailed off as I swallowed hard. "I can too," I told him and he raised an eyebrow. "You're mine and I won't let you leave me either."

He smirked and the kissed me hard.

I glance at Draco again, pulling out of the memory as I watch him drive. That was the only time I've ever seen him so inebriated. I was kind of glad I saw it, though. It made him more human... it showed that things did bother him.

"I wish we could ride on your motorbike," I say with a little smile and he glances at me. "That was fun."

"That was on your birthday," he says as he swerves into traffic, tugging on some of my hair until I look at him. "What a sweet thing you were then."

I smile at him and he puts his hand on my thigh again, running his fingers over my bare skin after pushing up my dress.

"Showing up at my house with your dress unzipped. You were such a tease."

"It wasn't all the way unzipped," I mumble as I remember and he smiles at me. "I just couldn't reach it."

"You looked all little and innocent," he says like he was remembering it well and I put my hand on top of his. "And that pink bike with the basket," he laughs at the memory and I find a laugh on my own lips as I look at him. "You were like a piece of candy just waiting to be eaten."

"Charming," I joke and he laughs again, a short bark of a laugh as the smile lingers on his lips.

I start playing with his fingers and, just because I can't help myself, I lean over and kiss his temple.

"I'm seventeen now," I say, actually realizing it as I pull back. "We both had birthdays," I point out. I stare at his profile as he moves the car through traffic. "They just passed by like it was nothing. I'm of age," I blink when I realize that... my birthday just came and went a month ago... just like it was nothing. "I'm of age now," I say, smiling at Draco.

"Indeed you are, sweetheart," he says.

"You're eighteen," I point out. "We should celebrate our birthdays... do something nice."

"You gave me an awfully nice present this morning," he says with his brow raised behind his glasses.

"You get that present all the time," I mutter with my cheeks red and he smirks.

"I'm not complaining."

"You wouldn't," I counter and he squeezes my thigh.

"I don't hear any complaints from you either, lover," he says and I snort at the nickname.

"I like being close to you," I say honestly and he glances at me, like my sentence had made him pause. I grab his hand. "You're my favorite person."

He smiles again, a very sweet and gentle smile.

"I'm glad you think so," he says softly. "At least someone likes me." He bites the corner of his lip and I tilt my head when I see him make the gesture.

"What?" I ask as he taps his fingers against my knee.

"Will you say cock again?" he asks and I make a face that he laughs at.

"Shut up," I flick the back of his hand. "Stop making fun of me," I say with a pout that he smirks at. "Or I'll never touch it again."

"Touch what?" he teases and I make a face.

"Shut up," I repeat and he laughs.

I laugh too and then I blink a few times, feeling something odd in my eye. I fumble around with little mirror... sun blocker... thing that's attached to the ceiling and when I pull it down to see the mirror, a few photos fall on my lap.

I tilt my head as I pick them up.

There are three of them.

Two are of me and Draco that Daphne had taken during the school year. In one I was looking up at him in that stupid cheerleading outfit before a Quidditch game. In another... another I don't recall being taken... we were in the Great Hall and he was kissing my cheek. I bite the corner of my lip as I turn to the last one.

It's just of me smiling.

"You keep pictures of us in your car?" I say, my voice taking a kind of tone one would take when viewing a rather adorable puppy.

He glances at me and then to the photos. "Yes," he says like it wasn't a big deal and I feel my eyes water. "Are you crying?"

"No," I say, getting my stupid pregnant emotions under control. "This is just really sweet, Draco."

"I wouldn't go that far," he replies. "I didn't have any other place to put them."

"You're lying," I say and he smiles.

"You're right," he answers as he brings his hand up to pinch my cheek. "I am lying. I just like looking at them sometimes and I'm in this fucking muggle thing more than I would like," he admits, his voice still light and playful but I know... I know he's telling the truth.

I feel my eyes watering again... but I stomp it down... not before he notices, of course.

"All these tears...You're acting like I like you or something."

"You _do_ like me," I say and he laughs. I put the pictures back in their hiding spot and then I take his hand, pressing my lips to his fingers. "And I like you too."

"Of course you do," he says with a smug smile as he runs his fingers down my face. "I'm your favorite person, remember?"

He puts his hand back on my thigh and I can't stop smiling like a fool.

I start to recognize some of the buildings we're passing and when we pull into a parking garage, I look at him again with my head tilted in thought.

"The aquarium?" I ask softly, another memory from my sixteenth birthday.

He nods.

"You do know that my parents donated a hell of a lot of money to have it opened," he says as he gets out and walks around to open my door. I take his hand when he offers it to me and he helps me out like a gentleman. "And my father owned the building. Now I own the building."

"Oh," I trail off as he takes my hand and starts walking us through the empty parking lot. "Did... I mean... what happened to all the animals?"

Since there was a war and all that.

"They're still in there," he admits. "It's closed to the public, but there were workers who stayed to help take care of them. The Death Eaters had more important things to do than attack an aquarium."

I nod my head and he takes out a key as we approach the large building.

"Besides," he adds and he unlocks one of the front doors. "The mermaids would go insane if they saw so much magic inside," he adds. "Remember that they were transported here and they don't actually know they're in an aquarium."

"I remember you saying that," I tell him as I put my hand on my back, my dress so tight it's almost painful to breathe.

"They're good fighters. If the Death Eaters made them realize where they were, they could probably kill everyone."

"We should have brought them with us to the battles," I say and he smiles at me before opening the door and motioning for me to go inside.

The building is completely dark and Draco turns on the lights with his wand. "The staff left for the day," he admits as he takes my hand.

"Why did you bring me here?" I ask him curiously as he puts his arm along my back, using his free hand to remove his sunglasses.

"Let me show you."

He leads me down the dark hallways where sea creatures swim past, illuminated by soft lights. I stop only a moment to admire them before being pulled on by Draco's insistent hand. There's a black door by the mermaid exhibit that he stops in front of and I move towards the glass to watch a few of them swim past while he unlocks the door.

They look as dreadful as I remember. Trapped in a cage, not realizing they're prisoners.

"Gin," he says to get my attention and when I look at him, he props open the door and makes a motion with his head. "Ladies first."

I smile a little and send one more look to the mermaids before taking the hand he offers me. The door leads down to a spiraling stair case that seems never ending, curling into the darkness deep underground. I hesitate a second when I feel a moment of fear.

"There are no monsters down there," he says against my ear to reassure me.

I nod my head. "It's just very dark," I admit as I take a timid step forward like the coward I am.

He laughs before lifting his wand and flicking a spell into the darkness. Torches blaze to life, lighting the way down with purple flames that lick against the stone walls. It makes me feel better and I look over my shoulder, giving Draco a thankful smile and kissing his cheek before making my way down.

The wrought iron stairway makes an awful clanking noise with each step and it seems to be held up by string. That doesn't put me at ease, but Draco does, and I'm grateful that he's walking so close behind.

"How far down is this?" I ask after a while as I keep my right hand white knuckled against the railing.

"Not too far," he admits.

Every once in a while, I can feel his hand brush the back of my dress, playing with the ribbon that ties around my middle with his clever fingers. I'm getting embarrassingly winded and I'm sweating when we finally reach the ground floor, only to find another locked door.

Draco takes out his keys and fumbles with a few of them before unlocking it and pushing it open. Candles burn with the that odd purple flame, showing a circular office. There's a black desk at the heart of the room and Draco goes towards it quickly as I walk about, admiring the artwork on the round walls.

They're all paintings of the ocean, some violent... some peaceful... but all of them are moving with magic. Dancing, and spinning and living.

Draco starts talking... about bonds and banks and inheritances as I reach out to touch one of the paintings, only half listening to him. I pull back quickly when lightening strikes in the foreground of the picture and I start chewing on my nails as Draco keeps talking.

This is the first time I've ever actually heard him talk about his finances and it's hard to keep track of all the business words he's spewing at me. There's a lot to keep up with when he starts talking about accounts and gold and properties and loop holes...

"Ginny," He snaps at me and I blink out of my thoughts to look at him. "Did you just hear what I said?"

I shake my head. "I'm sorry," I admit in a soft voice as I walk towards the desk and I put my hand on his shoulder. "What was it?"

"Now that my father is dead, I am the main beneficiary to the Malfoy Estates," he says as he pulls me to his lap.

He has papers stacked up on the desk and he runs his hand over them. I take off Draco's hat and place it nearby as I try to scan the pages to see what they say.

"All of the family assets are now in my name," he says as he picks up a green feathered quill. He dips it into an ink pot and initials some of the papers.

I sit back against his chest and chew on the corner of my lip until it bleeds.

"I think it's safe to assume that this is happening," he says, touching my stomach briefly with his chin grazing my shoulder. "I want you to sign this," he says as he pulls something from a drawer.

It's a stack of papers, like a contract, and he puts the quill in my right hand.

"What is it?" I whisper softly as I look it over, licking my lower lip to rid it of the blood.

It looks really familiar to me, but not in a good way.

"We're going to be a family very soon, Ginny," he says seriously rubbing my stomach again. "And there are still a few pockets of Death Eater's who refuse to surrender. This," he says, tapping the front of the contract. "Will make you the beneficiary of my inheritance in case something happens to me."

"Nothing is going to happen to you," I say worriedly and he nods his head.

"I know... just in case," he says. I lick my lips, trying to read the front page. "As of right now, I'm the last of the Malfoy name," he says and then he kisses the side of my neck. "Not for long."

To be honest, it looks a lot like the contract the Dark Lord had made me sign. It was written in English, but there were still some symbols I couldn't understand.

"Do we have to be married?" I ask gently as I turn to the second page. The second of one hundred it seems.

"This will bind you to me more," he admits, nodding to the contract. "The death of Voldemort has erased your bond with him," he says. "So my claim is still there," he adds.

He pulls a black box from his pocket, making me shift on his lap as he tries to get it.

"If you accept another heirloom from my family, it will solidify our bond once more. I already asked your father," he says and I give him a surprised look as he sets the black box in front of me. "And he agrees that it would be better if we were married."

I look at the box with something odd fluttering in my heart.

My father does like Draco now, and I know that my family would want me to be married before I had the baby. They were old fashioned in some aspects. Of course, my mom gave me a speech on doing what was best for me and trying to be happy... but even she admitted that Draco had surprised her. She was pleased with the young man he had grown up to be and if I truly loved him then she had nothing bad to say.

He won everyone over.

I pick up the box.

I want to ask him so many questions. What will happen to us once the Death Eaters are gone... what the plan will be once the world is set right... I want to ask him if he's sure he wants to do this with me even though he's told me a million time that he does.

He's being perfect about it and I turn the box in my fingers as I think about how sweet he is to me and how much I truly do love him.

I should jump at this chance. Why am I being so weird about it?

"You are taking a fucking long time," he says, his voice dropping to a dark place that makes me feel bad.

"I haven't been a very good girlfriend to you," I whisper as he runs his lips over my bare shoulder.

"What are you talking about?" he asks flatly and I glance at him.

"I've been so terrible... I've never trusted you, not once," I inhale a shaking breath. "I think it's because I'm so unsure of myself. It makes me do stupid things that hurt your feelings," I whisper as I think of what I did with Zabini.

"I can't pretend that I'm an easy person to be in a relationship with, Gin," he admits in a deep voice. "I like things to be a certain way and I put a lot of pressure on you."

"I've never been all into this relationship," I admit to him. "I always had one foot out the door because I think I just... I just thought that if you did do something wrong, then it would justify my feelings about it. I just think I never thought someone like you would like me."

"What does that mean?"

"It's just... you're so smart and good looking and you're a part of the well to do society that I had only read about in the papers. I love you," I tell him quickly so he doesn't get the wrong idea about what I'm saying. "I love you so much," I say as I turn in his lap so I can see him better. I put my arm around his shoulder to steady myself and he places his hand between my knees. "I think I just never understood why you loved me and I was always looking for a reason why you didn't."

"I love you," he says seriously I nod my head.

"I know," I open the black box and inside I find a beautiful ring of silver and diamonds. I pick it up and slip it on my ring finger. "I know," I tell him again as I lean forward to kiss him.

I put my hand on his neck to keep him there as I feel the magic run through my hand. It doesn't even bother me. When I finally pull back, I look over his face. He looks happy.

"I'm sorry," I tell him seriously. "I'm all in now."

He smiles a little and then he takes my hand, playing with the ring.

"This is my mother's ring," he tells me as he takes my left hand and lines it up with his. "You must never take it off."

"I won't," I whisper as I kiss his cheek. The thing is, Narcisssa Malfoy is still alive. "Doesn't she... Doesn't she want this ring?" I ask softly, not wanting to bring up painful memories of Lucius Malfoy's death.

"Not anymore," he says as he sighs, his breath ruffling my hair.

I nod my head and start flipping the contract until I reach the last page. I pick up the quill as Draco rubs my back.

"Don't you want to read it?" he asks as I put the quill to paper. "I can translate it for you."

I sign my name and date it. "If I can't trust you," I tell him as I lean in to kiss his lips. "Then I can't trust anyone."

He looks at me for a moment before grabbing my face and kissing me hard. The quill falls from my hand as I wrap my arms around his neck. I love the way he kisses and I prolong it as long as I can until he pulls back for air.

He watches my face as I try to catch my breath and he smiles as he runs his hand down my face.

"You are such a good girl, Ginny," he whispers before giving me a sweet little kiss on the side of my mouth.

He runs his thumb along my cheek.

"I do not want to be like my parents," he says and I furrow my brows.

"What do you mean?"

"My parents... they loved each other, but I don't know if my mother was actually in love with my father."

"How would you know that?" I ask with my brows raised, trying to figure out where this came from and where it will be going. I run my hand down his arm.

"She respected him, she was attracted to him, maybe she loved him at one time... but she didn't really love him like you love me," he smiles a little as his hand cups my face.

He gently runs his thumb over my lips, watching the progression like it turned him on.

It probably does.

"I don't know if he loved her that much either, to be honest. They were a good partnership, though. That's how we're brought up... to look for good partnerships. Love fades over the course of a few months... my father told me that. Look for benefits first... love is secondary if needed at all."

I put my hand on his neck and then I hold onto his earlobe.

"I don't know if he did... he probably did," he says to himself.

"What are you talking about?" I ask after a pause as I try to follow what he's talking about.

"My mother," he says, looking at me as my hand moves to thread into his hair. "She had affairs. A couple I knew about," he says and I frown. "My father knew, of course, but he didn't care as long as she was where she was supposed to be when he was home and that no one else knew about it. Maybe that's why she feels so guilty now."

I don't know what to say... so I don't say anything at all.

"I know he cheated too. He was hardly innocent," he adds with his brows up. "He always kept his mistresses in the upscale flats by Diagon Alley. When my mother found out, she nearly divorced him. Not because he had a mistress... but because he was doing it so closely to where she took me to shop for my school supplies. She hated the thought of running into one of his whores," he says and I nearly flinch at the word. "But that was it... she wasn't hurt or upset by him sleeping with another woman."

"That sounds... horrible," I say softly.

"It is horrible," he says darkly as he glares at the air in front of him. "I think the only thing they had in common was that they both loved me," he adds and I kiss his cheek again. "I refuse to live my life that way."

I don't say anything, I just keep on kissing him.

"I've never trusted anyone," he says as I run my lips over his jaw. "That's rule number one. You never trust another man with your life and you never trust a woman with your heart. Feelings just get in the way of logic."

"Love is a weakness in an ambitious man," I whisper and he nods his head.

"Exactly. Everyone knows that. It should be our family motto, actually,"

He looks at the table with his brows furrowed in thought. He looks so very serious and I kiss his cheek again.

"That's not normal, is it?" he says, smiling a little. "That's weird?"

"It's sad," I admit and that little smile he had on his face falls.

"Yeah," he nods his head, looking at the table again. "I guess it is."

"And not true," I offer. He flicks me a little look as I run my fingers through his hair.

"You would say that," he mutters softly. "You don't know any better."

"I know enough," I tell him seriously and he nods.

Then he looks at me again and studies my face before pressing a soft kiss to the corner of my mouth.

"Of course you do, sweetheart."

I pull away with a head shake. "I hate it when you do that."

"Do what?" he asks curiously, like he really didn't realize how he just spoke to me.

"Talk to me like that. Like I'm stupid."

"I don't think you're stupid."

"But you talk to me like I'm a toddler sometimes. I know I'm not clever like you, but you don't have to patronize me."

I go to pull away, but he stops me.

"I didn't realize that I was doing it," he admits. "I'm sorry." I nod in acceptance and he watches my profile. "You are pretty clever, you know," he says after a little pause. "You have done many brilliant things this year."

I snort at the thought. "That's hardly true."

"Most of your family members owe you their lives. If you hadn't had the forethought to take those souls when you had the chance, there would be a good chance they could have been dead or worse by the time the battle of Hogwarts started."

I open my mouth to respond, but he cuts me off.

"Mr. Lovegood is back to writing that ridiculous publication with his daughter because of all the money you gave to get him out of prison."

I think of Luna and her father with his printing press, spreading rumors mixed with truths about the resistance.

"You poisoned the Dark Lord and killed his snake. His magic was weakened because of it. We never would have defeated his army if he was at his full power. That was all your doing. No one told you that and you've done a million other brave things."

I don't say anything to that. I just look at my lap.

"I trust you," he says and it was the first time I think I've ever heard him say that. "I don't want to be like my father and I don't want you to be like my mother. You understand that I won't accept that, right? You will not be having any affairs and I will not be complacent with a glorified friendship. I will require that you love me and you will never share those feelings with anyone else."

"I wouldn't do that," I whisper and then I start thinking of Tom and his force and I recoil at the memory.

_Stop thinking about it._

"I'm serious, Ginny," he says and when I look at him, he flicks his eyes to mine. "I'm dead serious. This is it. This is the way it's going to be."

I nod my head, trying to ignore the uncomfortable turn in my body.

"Yes," I say, running my knuckles over his cheek. "I know."

I _know._

"You don't have to bully me into this," I admit because I hate it when he uses that tone of voice. When he says those kinds of things in a _this is how it's going to be and you have no say in that matter_ way. "I want that as much as you do. You don't have to make is seem like I don't have any other options."

"You don't," he replies flatly and I roll my eyes because he missed my point.

I kiss him again, even though what he just said was actually a little ridiculous... I couldn't laugh at him. Not when he was looking so serious. I feel like something just tightened on my chest... like a belt that was put one notch too tight.

I try to ignore the feeling.

"I didn't know any of that about your parents," I whisper with my lips still against his. It does seem like a terrible thing for a boy to know about their Mom and Dad. "It won't be that way with us, Draco," I tell him, pressing another kiss to his lips to reassure him. "I won't be that way... You won't be that way. When this is all over... we'll be happy. We'll be happy, I promise."

He smiles against my lips and deepens the kiss.

As he's kissing me, he pulls a key from his pocket. He dangles it in front of my face when I pull back to catch my breath and I let my eyes focus on it. It's gold and has a blue ribbon tied around the looped end.

"I have something else to show you," he says as he urges me to stand up.

I get to my feet and then follow him to one of the candle holders attached to wall. He puts the key into a keyhole I didn't even see and then the round walls start spinning. Spinning and spinning until an opening appears.

It's completely black inside, and Draco takes my hand as he lifts his wand to ignite the torches.

I let my jaw drop in awe as the hidden room glitters and sparkles against the fire light. The room is impossibly big... tall and long and full of so much gold and silver I can't even... I feel a little sick, actually... I think Draco sees it because he puts his arm around me to keep my knees from buckling.

"This is just half of it," he says lightly as he looks around. There are jewels and armor and paintings and statues... and _piles_ of gold."The rest is hidden at another location in France," he admits and then he smiles at me. "And this..." he hands me that key with the blue ribbons. "Is yours now as well."

"I...I..."I actually feel like I might faint. There is too much in this room... too much wealth. "I can't," I say as I try to push the key back to him. "I can't take this."

"Ginny," he says flatly as he steps in front of me, blocking my view of the dazzling room. "Malfoy's are rich. That's just the way it is," he says as he presses the key to my hand. "You never will want for anything again. What's mine is yours now and I have a lot to give."

I just stare at him for a while and then inhale a very deep breath.

"I don't have anything to offer you," I tell him honestly. "I don't. I don't have any money... I don't have any ancient family heirlooms... or anything. I don't have anything."

"You've already given me everything that I need," he says as he cups my face in his hands. "I just need you... that's all. Just Ginny," he adds with a little smile before kissing me.

_Just Ginny. _

I lean against a wall as he deepens the kiss and put my hand down... but I end up touching something sharp.

"Ouch," I hiss and Draco pulls back quickly as I cradle my hand to my chest.

"What is it?" he asks seriously as he takes my hand to inspect the damage.

"That thing," I snap, glaring down at some gold spiky thing beside me. "Hurt me."

"You're bleeding," he whispers as he looks at the blood beading at the tip of my finger.

_Blood is what binds us. _

"Poor baby," he smiles at me before kissing my finger, licking the blood away with his tongue.

_Blood is the most important thing. _

Blood.

Didn't Draco take my blood? I gently pull my hand back and give him an uncomfortable smile.

We only stay at the aquarium for a half hour, and Draco lets me take one last look at all the animals before we lock up for the night and go back to the car. He buckles me in like I was a child again and I stare at the beautiful ring on my finger, feeling a very warm and very girly feeling overtake my senses as we drive.

A wide grin graces my face the more I look at it.

I can't wait to show this to people... even if they won't really like it... like Hermione, but now I feel like gushing about it. I am sure Daphne will gush with me. I should show it to her first. It looks really good on my hand... the sun hits it just right... It's just so beautiful.

"What are you smiling about?"

"I'm just happy," I admit as I hold out my hand so the sun can catch the diamonds. "This is just lovely."

He touches my earlobe and when I look at him, he smiles.

"I'm glad," he says before going facing the road again.

I look back to the ring on my hand and then I let my eyes drift to the tip of my pointer finger where that small cut is.

"Draco," I say as I lick my lips, turning my hand so I can see the ring from a different angle. "What did you do with my blood?"

"What?" he asks as he turns left down a heavily populated road.

"My blood... you took it, remember?" I add. "You said it would help you kill the Dark Lord or something."

"Oh," he says as I remember the needle in my arm... I remember him keeping the vial of my blood and I don't remember him using it. "It turned out I didn't really need it after all," he says.

I study his profile when he puts his hand on my thigh. He's wearing the hat now and it looks impossibly good on him...

Maybe it's because I've grown up since this time last year... maybe it's because I've been around Draco and the Dark Lord far longer than it should... Maybe it's because I'm just not as naïve as I used to be but I know... I know that's not the truth.

I _know_ that he's_ lying._

He's lying to _me_.

I look out the window with my brows furrowed in thought as his fingers dance along the inside of my thigh. I did tell him I was all in now...

I just have to figure out what that means to me.

* * *

"... And then there was this huge explosion and we went flying."

Ron makes a motion with his hand to show me and I give him a tight lipped smile as we walk around the gardens behind the hotel. Harry is with us and he has his hands stuffed into his jeans as Ron rambles on about the fight.

He's been talking about it for the last half hour.

He likes talking about battles. Harry doesn't like to talk at all.

"And then this guy came running towards me and Harry," he pushes Harry's arm with his elbow and Harry nods his head. "Harry came up behind him with his wand and shot a curse right at his chest. It was brilliant. The best thing I've ever seen."

"It sounds nice," I say and then I make a face because it didn't sound nice at all.

"Harry is such a great dueler. I don't think you've seen him in action, Gin," he says and I nod my head, glancing at Harry as he looks at the ground. "You'd be blown away."

"I'm sure," I answer and then I look at Harry again. "He's great at everything," I say and his cheeks blush.

"That's not true," Harry says seriously.

"Have you seen him dance?" Ron laughs as he punches Harry's arm. "He is bloody terrible at that."

"You're one to talk about dancing," Harry counters and Ron's ears turn red.

I smile a little and then Ron spots Hermione coming out of one of the back doors. He waves her down and then looks at me. "I've got to go," he says as he gives me a grin. "Hermione is taking me to a movie theater. They say that the screen is as big as a wall!"

He takes off running, leaving Harry and I to ourselves.

I put my hand on my back and try to shift my legs as an uncomfortable silence falls between us. "I'm sorry, Harry," I tell him as I spot a bench near by. "But I have to sit down."

I take a seat and Harry sits down beside me quickly.

"Ron talks a lot," he says after a few moments and I nod my head as I sit back with my hand rubbing my stomach. "I'd rather not remember any of that, but it seems to be all he can talk about."

"I've noticed," I reply as he puts his hands on his knees.

My feet hurt... so I slip off my sandals and let my heels rest in the cool grass. I think that my feet are changing sizes... That or they're swollen all the time because nothing I own seems to fit properly. I didn't expect the betrayal from my faithful footwear and it pisses me off.

I'm so engrossed by my thoughts of my changing body, that I totally forget about Harry... That is until he coughs to get my attention and I pull my thoughts away from my stupid feet to find him staring at me.

"Where's Malfoy?" he asks. "I don't think I've seen you without him since we've been here."

"He's inside," I say nodding to the hotel. "He's reading," I add with an eye roll.

I kept trying to talk to him this morning and he kept snapping at me because he was reading the Daily Prophet and I was _bothering_ him. He even called me irritating and told me to go find something to do with myself.

Because he's lovely.

"Oh," he says as he scratches his forehead. "That sounds exciting," he says sarcastically and I give a little laugh that he smiles at.

"Draco is all kinds of fun," I joke and now it's Harry's turn to laugh a little.

I put my hand on the key I keep on a gold chain around my neck and I start playing with it. I had no idea what else to do with it, to be honest. What does one do with a key that can unlock half a Malfoy fortune? Keep it close. That's all I could do because I know with my luck I would probably lose it.

When we hear a giggle, we both turn towards the noise. Daphne is running through the garden in a revealing two piece swim suit that's a strong wind away from being indecent. Her hair is wet and her body is dripping from the pool. George is close behind, chasing her in swim trunks and bare feet.

They're both laughing loudly like it was all great fun.

I can barely hide my displeasure when George catches up with her, grabbing her around the middle and tossing her in the air. She squeals in delight and then he throws her over his shoulder like a cave man so he can carry her back to the pool.

There they are, having the time of their lives, and here am I... barefoot and pregnant with a boyfriend who is thoroughly annoyed with me.

How unfair life is.

"I know it shouldn't bother me, but I feel completely disgusted when I see other people acting so happy," I admit as I tug on my necklace a little too hard and Harry laughs. "Especially them."

I don't know why. I have nothing against Daphne dating my brother... but maybe I do... maybe because I know Daphne has been around the block a few times... but I also know that George can hold his own...

I just don't like it.

Maybe because I'm jealous that their relationship seems so simple, but that's a secret thought that I barely allow to surface.

"I know exactly what you mean," Harry commiserates with me and I'm grateful. "There are all kinds of weird pairings that the war brought about," he adds, only to be drowned out by a splash and another obnoxious giggle.

_Ugh_.

"Yeah," I agree. The baby kicks like he just wanted to remind me that I would never be carefree again and I sigh loudly."I just never saw that one coming."

"I didn't see a lot of things coming," Harry says gently as his eyes flick to the ring on my finger... To Draco's claim that shines brightly in the sun for anyone to see.

I don't bother responding to that and another silence falls between us as we both get lost in our own bitter thoughts.

"We could go too, you know," he says and when I look at him in question, he's quick to explain. "To the movie theater... I mean... It's only a block or two away. I have some muggle money if you want to go."

"I do like movies," I admit. I like that I can lose myself in them for a couple hours and not have to think for myself. "Do we have to like... find out what's playing or something?" I ask, unsure about how it would work.

He shrugs. "I'm sure there will be something we can watch."

"Okay," I nod my head. It would be nice to get away... especially if Daphne and George insist on flirting so loudly the whole hotel knows them by name. "That sounds like fun," I tell him with a smile and then my smile falters when I think of Draco. "I should ask Draco."

"If you can go?" he snaps, his voice taking on a bitter edge that I don't like.

"No, if he wants to go too," I explain as I struggle to my feet. "Would that be alright?"

"If he wants to come, he can... but I'm not paying for his ticket."

"I doubt he would want that either," I snap before exhaling slowly and slipping on my shoes. "Just give me a second. I'll go ask."

He doesn't say anything, he just makes a face as I go back into the hotel. I use the elevator to get to the thirteenth floor and when I get to my room, Draco is sitting on the bed... with the paper strewn about him. He hovers over the pages with his brows furrowed and a pen in his hand.

Right where I left him.

"Hey," I say, but he doesn't look up. "Are you looking for a job?" I joke but it falls on flat ears.

He completely ignores me until I try again.

"Do you want to take a break from that for a little while, babe?" I ask in a louder voice.

"I told you I was busy," he says flatly as he turns one of the pages.

I swallow my bitter response and walk further into the room. "Is there anything I can help you with?" I offer because he's been at it all day, but he shakes his head. "What are you doing exactly?" I ask and he rubs his eyes.

"I'm trying to figure out who I need to get close to next," he says, holding up a paper that has a photo of four wizengamot members on it. He taps a photo of a man with long white hair tied back in a pony tail with the end of his pen. "One of these men will take my father's seat at the tribunal and I have to figure out which one I want to put my name behind."

"Oh..." I say because I'm stupid and I give him a smile when I think of Hermione's words.

She's wrong of course, but there was some good advice sprinkled in there...We are going to have a child together, after all. He's going to be a_ Dad_... and I'm going to be a M_om_... as wild as that thought is, I can't help but want to find some common ground with him. I don't want us to be so conflicted with our beliefs if we're going to be a family soon.

I'm willing to give in a little to meet him in the middle if he is too.

_Love is a partnership. _

"Is there... Is there anything I can help you with?" I ask as I walk further into the room and stop when I'm by the bed to look over his shoulder.

"Just keep being pretty," he says, looking back at his papers and dismissing me as he writes something down. "That's all I need from you."

"Draco," I sigh, almost offended by his off color compliment. "I'm not useless, you know," I tell him as I reach out to touch his shoulder, squeezing gently in affection. "We're in this together, aren't we?"

"Are we?" he asks me, breaking away from his paper to give me a look. "Gin, you don't believe the same things I do. I don't want to pull you into something that is just going to make you mad at me."

I frown at that and sit beside him.

"You've never taken the time to explain your thoughts to me," I admit softly because I don't want us to be so different. Not now when we're so entwined with one another. Not now when I'm in it for the long run. "I know you're not like him," I say gently. "You're not like Tom..."

"The Dark Lord was a mad man," he admits. "And a half-blood who had no business trying to rule our society... but with this war, I've been fighting against my own interests," he says, narrowing his eyes as he looks back at the paper. "_Our_ interests," he corrects himself as he reaches out to touch my stomach. "The people who are in charge now do not share my politics and I did not work this hard to live life under their rules."

"How are they different?" I ask. I look into his eyes and I put my hand over his.

"Honestly, there are a lot of things and not all of them include muggle/magical relations," he says as he pulls his hand back to reach for the paper again. "But I'm really busy right now, sweetheart. We can talk about it later, yeah?"

I nod my head. "Yeah..." I trail off until I remember why I came up here in the first place. Poor Harry. I'm always making him wait. "I know you're busy," I tell him and he flicks me a little look again. "But do you want to take a break and go to a movie theater with me? A cinema?"

"What?" he asks flatly.

I can just _feel_ the enthusiasm.

"There's a place that plays movies," I tell him with a little smile as I reach out to touch him again, wanting him to come and enjoy something with me. "They have TV screens the size of a whole wall," I repeat Ron's words with a tender smile. "Do you want to come with me? I think it would be fun."

"No," he says before going back to the paper. I stop smiling then I nod my head. Of course he wouldn't want to go. It was silly of me to even ask. I go to get up, but he grabs my wrist. "You're not going by yourself."

"I'm not," I tell him with a frown. "Other people are going too."

He puts the paper down. "Who are you going with?"

My first instinct is to lie to him, but I know that's not right. There's no reason to lie.

"Harry," I say and when I see _that_ look get into his eyes, I'm quick to cover. "I mean. I think Ron and Hermione are going to be at the same cinema."

"So, it's a double date?"

I give him a look. "It's not like that. I invited you, didn't I?"

"Knowing I would say no." He makes a face and lets go of my wrist. "I don't think so, Ginny," he says darkly. "You're not going to some muggle bullshit without me."

"But you don't want to go."

"Exactly," he says flatly. "So you're not going either."

_Love is not a dictatorship. _

"I just came up to ask if you wanted to come with me. I didn't come to ask your permission."

"Funny how that turned around on you."

I shake my head after he stares me down and then with an angry jolt, I walk towards the door.

"Ginny," he snaps and I look over my shoulder. "I said no."

"You're not my father," I tell him sharply. "I don't need to ask you for this kind of thing."

He stands up to tower over me which is a very effective Draco arguing tactic because he's so freaking tall.

"You can watch a movie in here," he says, motioning to the television. "It's bad enough we're staying at this fucking muggle hotel where we can't do magic. I don't need you any more integrated into their culture than need be."

Sometimes I forget how much he dislikes muggles. That's just another thing that divides us...

"Babe," I sigh to get him to see reason so I'm not automatically going on the defensive. "You're not being reasonable..."

"Sit down." He actually snaps his finger and points to the couch.

That does it. I'm officially angry and I give him a hateful look for treating me like a dog.

"I'll see you when I get back," I tell him condescendingly.

I go to open the door, but a spell shoots past my shoulder and slams it shut. I inhale a surprised breath and then I look over my shoulder with my brows up in disbelief.

"You aren't allowed to do magic here!" I shout. I turn to face him with my hands clenched into fists.

"You heard me. I said no," he answers as he tucks the wand in his pocket. "I have plenty of places we could stay. The only reason we're here is because your parents thought that this was the best idea and I wanted you to be around your loved ones," he says as he walks towards me, acting like he's the final say in all my life decisions. "I did not come here just so you could go skipping around acting like a muggle with Harry Potter."

I inhale an angry breath before leveling him with a hateful glare. "What's wrong with you?" I snap harshly as he narrows his eyes. "You go all over the place without me and I never tell you what you can and can't do."

He stares me down like his glares would convince me to just obey him like a mindless puppet.

"You're only doing this because I haven't been paying much attention to you today," he says and my temper flares again because he's talking to me like I'm some senseless child. "Well, you have my attention now. You can sit over there," he says, nodding to the couch in front the television. "I'll be done here soon and then we'll talk about whatever you want."

"Wanting to go to the movies isn't a ploy to hurt or get back at you for not paying attention to me," I snap in disbelief. "I could have gone without even telling you about it and you would have never known!"

"Trust me," he says darkly. "I would have found out and you would not have liked that."

I shake my head and then turn back to the door to twist it open. He slams it shut with his hand by my face and I swallow hard. My anger so thick I can taste it.

"Stop it," I say flatly as I glare at the wood grain.

"Sit down on the goddamn couch," he says as I glare at his hand.

I will not be told what to do. Not like this. Not _for _this. Not even from him._ Especially_ not from him.

"We're a couple, Ginny," he keeps talking as I glare at the door. "You can't just go around doing whatever the hell you want."

I know what he's doing. I can tell... I can see it. He's going to try to twist this. He's going to try to make this into something it's not. He's going to turn this around on me until I'm the one apologizing.

"Do you realize how easy it would be for someone to pick you up outside of the hotel? There is no magic in this town, no wards to keep you safe, and you want to go out in public with Harry Potter of all people."

I shake my head, wanting him to stop talking

"Listen," he says with a sigh as he runs his hand up my arm. "After all this blows over, I will be better to you," he says gently. "We'll go places. We'll travel and I will show you how amazing our world can be. I'll take you to shows, and plays, and concerts, and great restaurants... You don't need to do this muggle stuff. You don't even know your own culture, sweetheart," he adds a kiss to my shoulder like he was trying to coax me into agreeing with him. "Maybe that's why you don't understand my position. I will show you. I will show you very soon, but for now we just have to lay low and stay together."

"I don't understand why you're doing this," I whisper, refusing to face him after the stupid thing he just said. "You said you trusted me... Were you just saying that? Why would you say that if you don't mean it? Why would you say that if you don't practice it?"

There's a heavy pause and I can feel him staring at me.

"I've had my moments," I admit. "But you've never trusted me no matter what you say," I add spitefully. I finally turn around to face him, but he doesn't even move back. He's standing too close to me. "It shouldn't be like this. You shouldn't hold all the cards all the time. I shouldn't let you."

He stares me down and I shake my head.

"You know, Harry knew you were going to do this. He even mentioned it when I said I was going to come up to talk to you. Everyone knows how demanding you are. They think you're too controlling."

"Do they now?" he says with his brows raised. "Who told you that?"

"Everybody!" I snap.

"I doubt everybody told you that," he says sharply. "There is not enough time in the day for _everyone_ to say that to you."

"Everyone who matters," I say and he laughs."Don't laugh. This isn't funny. I agree with them, you know. You are too controlling and I just let you because I love you so much."

"You need my control, Ginny," he snaps at me, leveling me with a steely eyed glare. "Without it, you make stupid fucking decisions."

That hurts me, so I retract like it was a direct hit to the face. He exhales slowly after a moment like he knew he went too far and I resist hitting him even though I want to. He pinches the bridge of his nose, stepping back to give me room to breathe.

"I should have worded that better," he admits softly, like if he used that gentle voice I would automatically forgive him.

"I won't let you be such a manipulative jerk to me anymore." I say in a deadly voice that I adopted from him.

The conviction in my tone must surprise him because he doesn't say anything for a few moments.

Good.

Then his anger comes like a wave crashing against land.

"I'm the manipulative jerk?" he snaps after getting over the initial shock of my emotions. "You manipulate me all the fucking time."

"I do not," I hiss with my arms crossed.

"You're fucking doing it now, aren't you? Pouting around until you get your way. Don't act like you're above it. All you do is toy with my emotions."

"That is not true!" I yell like a mad person and he shakes his head. "I just want to go to the movies with my friend! There is no reason for this fight!"

"Are you going to start crying now?" he asks with a sharp brow raised. He pretends to check his watch and he taps the face. "Right about now is the time during the fight when you start crying to make me feel bad."

"I don't cry to make _you_ feel bad!"

"You don't?" he says sarcastically. "I highly doubt that."

"I cry because_ I f_eel bad, you insensitive prick!" I stand straight and tighten my fists by my sides. "I am my own person, you know," I tell him harshly. "You're just upset that I'm not around all of your friends who'll just stuff your agenda down my throat. I can do what I want without your approval and I'm not an idiot. I can make my own decisions."

"My agenda?" he says harshly. "I've been with Order members for half the year. You don't think I've had that agenda stuffed down my throat? Trust me, it's much more disgusting coming from your family members."

"What does that mean?" I ask sharply.

He steps back and rubs his right eye. "Never mind."

"No, what did that mean?" I ask seriously as I take a step closer to him. "You think my family is disgusting?"

"I didn't fucking say that. Don't tell me that I said something I didn't say. This is another thing you do," he snaps. "You twist my fucking words around."

"Then what did you say?"

"I'm saying, you aren't the only one being fed someone else's beliefs. Let's just leave it at that."

I turn back to the door and I hesitate a second as I decide what I want to do. How embarrassing would it be to explain this to Harry? He knows how Draco is anyways... maybe I should just go anyways, but then Draco would be so mad at me...

But I feel like that's why I have to go.

I don't need his control. It's not like this is a life or death situation... Draco is just being... just being a tyrant.

Like Tom.

I shake my head. No, he's not winning this fight. I put my hand on the door knob so I can finally leave, but he grabs my arm. I nearly start crying in frustration, but I shake them away and decide to focus those angry tears on actual anger.

"Draco, stop."

He presses his body into my back and I clench my eyes shut.

"Don't," I tell him flatly as I shake him off. "Stop touching me!" I shout to get him to leave me alone, but of course he doesn't because he's Draco and Draco never leaves me alone when I want to get away from him.

"Wait," he says as I try to push him away. "Just wait," he snaps and I glare over my shoulder.

He glares right back before his eyes soften and he looks away for a moment, finally letting go of my arm.

"You're right. I am being unfair," he admits, and it sounds like it's hard for him to say. "I get these notions in my head and it's very hard for me to shake them." I don't respond and he steps away. "I try not to have those thoughts about you... I can't help but feel like one day, if I'm not paying attention, you are going to stab me in the back."

"I wouldn't-"

"I know," he cuts me off before I can even finish and he reaches into his pocket. "I know," he repeats as he takes out his wallet. "I can be awful to you sometimes."

"What are you doing?" I ask him as he pulls out a few muggle bills.

"It's only a couple hours, right?" he says flatly as he hands them to me. "That's all."

"What is this?"

"It's money," he says like I was stupid and I clench my jaw.

"I know that, but..."

"I'm sorry," he says gently, like he meant it and I frown because I don't know what game he's playing. "I..." he trails off for a moment and I raise a brow in surprise. "I shouldn't tell you what to do," he says and I feel the fire that had inflamed my heart slowly start to extinguish because of the way he's looking at me. "I can't help but want to," he adds coldly. "It's just the way I've always been. You can't imagine what goes through my head."

He brings his hand up and runs his knuckles down my cheek.

"Go, have fun, and then come back to me," he says seriously.

I feel like I should be thankful... but then... then doesn't that mean he won again? Is this just another spin to manipulate me? I should trust Draco... I shouldn't have these thoughts, and I put my hand over his as I try to get them out of my mind.

"But I don't want to hear about how great it was or how funny Harry Potter is. Is that understood?"

"Harry has money," I say gently, my anger all but gone now, and Draco raises an eyebrow.

"That's not happening," he says harshly. "He's not fucking paying. I do have my limits."

I don't say anything for a moment and then I nod my head, looking down at the muggle money before flicking him a little glance.

"You have no reason to worry," I tell him gently, moving my hand out to touch his chest. "Trust me," I say softly, running my fingers down until they teeter off by his belt.

He nods. A quick and sharp nod that gives away his doubt.

"Are you sure you don't want to come?" I add, wanting to give him a chance to be involved again.

"No," he says flatly as he goes back to the bed... back to the paper. "I do not."

"Okay," I say, almost smiling when I see him plop down on the mattress like a pouting child. "I'll see you when I get back..." I add quickly.

He waves me off as he goes back to his papers.

When I get back downstairs, Harry is leaning against the wall. "Jesus," he says when he sees me. "I was going to send out a search party for you."

"Sorry," I tell him with Draco's money just kind of clutched awkwardly in my hand.

"Malfoy not coming?" he says when he notices Draco isn't with me and I shake my head. "Not surprising," he mutters under his breath.

"He's busy," I cover and he nods his head, accepting my answer but not believing it.

I can tell by the way he's looking at me that he doesn't, but I don't bother pushing it because my emotions are still raw from the fight and I fear if I try to explain it, I just might cry.

"You ready to head out?"

I nod my head and follow him down the stairs to go outside. "You do know where this is, right?" I say when we get outside the building. I don't know my way around muggle cities and the thought is almost scary to me.

There's too much noise, too many machines... too many things that can go wrong because magic isn't there to fix it.

"Of course," he answers to reassure me. "You better put that money in your pocket or something," he says we make our way down the sidewalk. "You are just begging for someone to mug you."

"They would mug a pregnant woman?" I joke and he smirks.

"That means you just can't run as fast."

I laugh a little and stuff the paper money in the front of the shirt... thing... that I'm wearing. It's a maternity shirt that my Mom got me from the department store across the street. It's a weird floral printed fabric in pink and green that kind of resembles a brightly colored tent. Draco made a face when I first put it on and Daphne said '_oh honey'_ like I was some poor orphan in a third world country who was wearing the only thing available to me.

But it's comfortable... and it fits.

"Are you happy?" Harry asks after a while, cutting off a rather exciting conversation about the weather.

"I am," I say with a smile. "I do like movies..."

"No, I meant... are you happy. Like in general..."

I shrug. "I'm grateful to be alive," I admit as I think about Draco and how rough we still are with one another at times. "I'm grateful that people that I love have survived this."

"Yeah, me too," he says with a head nod.

"I mean... who could be happy after all this?" I ask seriously as we walk. "I mean... things make me happy but there's this..."

"Thing always in the back of your mind," Harry finishes for me and I nod my head.

"Yeah, like a shadow that kind of creeps up on me when I'm not expecting it," I add as I kick a pebble with my shoe. "It makes me feel bad."

"I've felt that all my life," he says softly and I glance at him. "I thought it would stop... when he was finally dead, but it's still there. It's like I'm always waiting for the other shoe to drop."

"I understand," I tell him and he gives me a sad little smile that clenches my heart.

We cross the street and start down a busier block where muggles come out of the buildings with shopping bags.

"I think my shirt is blinding people," I mutter as I pass by a woman who gives me a double take. "That or it's because I'm so huge."

"I doubt that," he says smiling a little. "You're not that huge."

"You're not off the hook either," I tell him as we pass by two old women who look at my stomach before whispering about me behind their hands. "They probably think you're my baby daddy."

He snorts. "You have been watching a lot of muggle telly," he says with a handsome grin.

I laugh a little too when I realize he's right.

When we get to the theater, we decide on some animated show with talking animals. It's funny and kind of clever... even if the theater is full of children eating popcorn and snacks. I only had to go to the bathroom two times which was good considering how bad I've been with it lately.

Being pregnant is awful.

At the end of the movie, all the animals work together to help save the farm and I feel my eyes stinging with tears because of how nice it is.

"Are you okay?" Harry whispers when I sniff loudly.

I nod my head. My hormones are ridiculous and they embarrass me.

"Are you sure?" he asks and I nod again, wanting him to stop looking at me. "Ginny," he whispers after I violently wipe my eyes, trying to stop crying over the stupid pigs and fake horses.

When I look at him, he brings a hand up and helps me wipe some tears away. I just stare at him, looking into his emerald eyes as they skip over my face.

"Maybe we should have picked a less heavy movie?" He says and I nearly laugh.

"It was a cartoon about animals. I don't think you get any lighter than that," I reply and he smiles again.

Then I realize how close we are, so I back away quickly. "We should go back," I say as I stand up. The credits are rolling and my face feels hot.

Harry leads the way out of the cinema and I follow behind, wiping my red eyes with the back of my hand like a freak and hoping no one else sees me. When we get outside, the sun is still shining brightly and I narrow my eyes. Harry takes out his sunglasses and then hands them to me.

"Here," he says, placing them in my hands.

"No..."

"Just take them," he says, refusing to take the glasses back. "It's too sunny and I can't see properly when I wear them anyways. They're not prescription."

I hesitate a second before putting them on. "Thanks," I say, feeling something warm settle on my chest. If there was an alternate reality, I think Harry and I would have made a very good couple. "You're very nice."

"I know," he says, like it pained him. "And it doesn't exactly get me anywhere."

"It will pay off one day," I tell him as I push the glasses further up my nose. "I think the world needs more nice guys," I admit as I think of Draco and how _not _nice he is.

"Yeah," he says with a sigh as he stuffs his hands in his pockets. "That's what everyone says."

I snort because I've never heard anyone actually say that but I suppose he's right. Guys like Draco always win and guys like Harry, who deserve nothing but happiness, always seem to come up short.

I try not to think about it too much.

Traffic is heavy on the road and the heat is making me sweat. I hate sweating and, with the sun glaring down at us, the hike back to the hotel seems like an epic journey. Harry and I walk the rest of the way in silence and I stay stuck in my own thoughts about my future and hating humidity for all that it is.

"Watch out," Harry throws his arm in front of me and I nearly fall back when a motorbikes cuts in front of us on the sidewalk, blocking our path.

I feel instant panic when I see the rider in all black and I have flashes of Death Eaters and deadly curses that snap bones clean in half. Harry slides in front of me and takes out his wand, ready to fight and defend me as I ball my hands into fists. Muggles scream and jump out of the way as the rider puts the stand down and takes off the helmet.

When I see Blaise Zabini climb off the bike, I'm not sure if I'm relieved or pissed off to see him.

"Zabini," Harry says sharply as he pockets his wand. "You can't just park on the sidewalk," he scolds, sounding upset and little bit relieved as well.

My feelings exactly.

I push Harry's sunglasses up to the top of my head and I narrow my eyes as Zabini smirks at us with a shrug.

"Where are you kids going looking so happy?" Blaise asks curiously. He looks in between me and Harry with a grin on his face as he puts his riding helmet in the crook of his leather clad arm.

I bet he's really hot in that leather jacket and the thought of him being so uncomfortable pleases me.

"Quite the pair you two make," he adds, looking at me again like he caught me cheating.

I take a step away from Harry like I thought Zabini would run back and tell Draco.

He probably would, the bastard.

"What are you doing?" I ask sharply, tugging down my brightly colored shirt and glaring at him. "You nearly killed us."

"Hardly," he laughs as he rests his foot on the bike. His jeans are way too tight and I stare at his crotch one moment longer than I should because he notices and he actually laughs.

I turn away quickly and blush, putting Harry's sunglasses on once more to shield my wondering eyes.

"Is that Draco's?" I ask. I look at the familiar motorbike behind him as I try to divert from my embarrassment.

"You look very muggle today, Weasley," he ignores my question as he looks me over, eying my loud t-shirt with a hateful sneer curling his face. "I believe my Grandmother had a couch like that once."

"Shut up," I mutter as I pull on the shirt again. "I know it's bad."

"Where were you headed?" he asks curiously, flicking his eyes to Harry Potter once more.

"I really don't think that's any of your business, Zabini," Harry tells him seriously.

"Maybe not," Zabini replies with a smirk. "But I am a nosy fucker none the less and you nearly look happy, Potter," he jokes. "He is such a glum bastard, isn't he, Gin?"

I really don't like that he called me that and I crinkle my nose at the thought of him trying to give me a nickname.

"What do you want, Blaise?" I ask softly. "Did you need something?" I ask because he wouldn't just go out of his way to chit chat with me and Harry.

Or at least, I hope not.

"Not really," he says with a shrug as he pulls something from inside his jacket. It's a rolled up piece of parchment on blue paper. "I do have a message for Potter, though," he says as he goes to hand the parchment to Harry, but he pulls back right when Harry is ready to take it. "Where were you two coming from?" he asks, tapping the message against his lips as he looks me over. "I doubt Draco was okay with this."

"What does it matter to you?" I ask and he smiles. "Or Draco," I mutter to myself as I look away.

"Just curious," he says with shrug. "It looks like the whole Ginny needs another man in her life spot was taken away from me."

I blush hard and narrow my eyes as Harry blinks at that answer.

"Shut up," I hiss and Zabini laughs.

He laughs and he laughs.

Harry snatches the message and he reads it as Zabini smiles at me with a snicker still on his lips.

"I'm sorry," Harry says as he stuffs the message in his pocket and I give him an odd look because his voice sounds so intense. "I have to go see Kingsley."

Kingsley is one of the early leaders of the Order and his main job is to gather intelligence for up coming missions. When he writes, you know something big is about to happen.

"Okay? What is it?" I ask with a frown because he looks so uncomfortable.

"I'll tell you when I get back."

Then he runs off before I can say anything else. I frown at his back as he jogs across the street to get to a safe App Zone and I put a hand on my hip when he disappears around the corner. It leaves me alone with Blaise and I flick him a little glance as he looks as pleased as can be.

"What did that message say?" I ask and Blaise shrugs. "You don't know?"

"No, I do," he answers pleasantly. "I just don't want to tell you." I make a face that he laughs at. "Don't frown... we're not an item anymore, remember? You can't just get away with hurting my feelings and still reap the rewards of my friendship."

"Do you even have feelings?" I ask.

"Why do you say such mean things to me?" he asks and I shake my head before walking past him and that freaking motorbike.

I keep walking and he rolls the bike, falling in step beside me as people glare at him and hop out of the way.

"Stop following me."

"My God, you're full of yourself," he says with a smirk. "You aren't the only person in the world and last time I checked, you didn't own this particular sidewalk."

"You're bothering me."

"Of course I am," he says and I spare him a harsh little look. "Queen Ginny must only see people by appointment."

"Shut up, Zabini," I hiss, stopping fully to glare at him with my hands on my back. "What do you want?"

"You're a bitch, did you know that?" he asks flatly and I feel a fire in my heart as I clench my fists at my side. "I could see you from a mile away, you know," he says as he follows me when I decide to get away from him again. "What you're wearing is atrocious."

"Do you enjoy insulting me?" I ask, tugging on the shirt again as I speed walk towards the hotel. "Is that really your only motivation?"

"I enjoy looking at you," he tells me, seemingly pleased with the blush on my cheeks. "And your blushes. I enjoy those to."

I make a hmf sound that he laughs at.

"Don't you miss me?" he says, for once not sounding half as joking. "I know I miss you," he adds. When I look at him in surprise, he smirks before putting on his helmet and taking off again.

Muggles scream and jump out of the way as he swerves the bike into heavy traffic. I frown at his trail in the distance. _I know I miss you_. Honestly. I roll my eyes at the thought of him missing anyone before making my way back to the hotel by myself without further interruption.

I'm already to tell Draco about the movie, but when I get to our room, he's no where to be found. I find a note by the bed letting me know that he'll be back later and I frown, missing him already like some pathetic thing.

I take off my shoes and sit on the bed, tired from all the walking in the hot sun. I spot Hermione's book laying on the nightstand and I pick it up to kill some time.

I flick through the pages until I settle on one story that sticks out from the others.

_The Rape of Persephone _

That word triggers all kinds of horrible images in my head and I try to shake them as I read on. It's the story of a girl with an overprotective mother who kept her hidden away from the world. She was just a sheltered maiden who loved playing in the sunshine and picking wildflowers in a meadow with her nymph friends.

Until she caught the eye of Hades, the Lord of the Dead and King of the underworld.

He was so tempted by her beauty that he made a plan to kidnap the girl and bring her down into the darkness below the earth.

I feel a chill creep up my spine as I read, burrowing further under the covers with the blanket tight around me

He watched her as she played in the meadow, picking flowers and putting them in her hair and had commanded the earth to grow a single black rose to tempt her as she had tempted him. Persephone was so caught up in how unusual the rose looked, that she didn't even question it's existence in the light meadow and began to pluck it from the soil.

As she did, the ground opened up and four black horses pulling a golden chariot rose from the depths of the earth. Hades, in his dark armor, grabbed Persephone by the arm and tugged her into the carriage before urging his horses to jump back into the crack in the earth, back to hell, where she would be his Queen.

_Queen... _

I frown at that and I skip a few more pages before reading the end of the story.

The overprotective mother had demanded her back and punished the world for her absence. No crops would grow in the coldness that followed and the land became ice. Many had perished and many more would die, so the other gods urged Hades to give Persephone back for the sake of humanity.

He had to agree, but before he gave her back to her mother, he tricked Persephone into eating six pomegranate seeds that grew underneath the earth. Anyone who ate from the land of the dead had to remain there forever, but she only ate six, instead of the twelve he intended.

She would have to return to him six months out of the year to reign over the land of Darkness as his Queen. The other half of the year would be spent with her mother, in the sunshine, where the crops were plentiful and land was healthy.

I put my hand on my stomach and look down at the baby.

How very familiar that story seems to me now and that upsets me. I go to close the book, but I stop myself.

There's a note at the end of the chapter... I recognize Draco's handwriting right away and my heart flutters wonderfully at his words. He writes my name first and it's like he knew I would find myself reading this story, like he knew I would find it so troublesome... and he's lucky I didn't give this back to Hermione, because she would be confused as hell to receive this love note intended for me.

And a love note it was... as loving and mushy as Draco could get anyways.

_It is better to reign in hell with the person you love, than serve in heaven with the person you don't. _

He writes, his handwriting perfect and slightly slanted.

_You are loved and you are mine. _

He doesn't sign it... but he doesn't have to. Draco writes how he talks... clear and sharp.

_You are loved. _

I smile at the words as I read them again.

_And you are mine._

I have a very girlish smile on my face as I lay back and read the story again with new eyes. I don't find it half as upsetting when I decide to make it a love story. It's nearly romantic if I make the two main characters tragic heroes in love instead of a captive and her captor.

It only takes a little turn in a story to change it completely, doesn't it?

I decide to wait up for Draco... but as the hours pass with out word, I start to worry. But my worry soon subsides because his missions have taken him away from me before...sometimes he doesn't come home into well into the night...but he always comes home eventually.

I fall asleep sometime after midnight with thoughts of Gods and Hell dancing in my head.

When I wake, Draco is still not back and my worry comes back tenfold when I find my mother at my door, holding back tears with a letter gripped in her fingers.

_You are loved and you are mine._

Those words seem to have more meaning now.

* * *

"...I'm sure it's nothing serious."

I nod my head.

"They've only been gone for..." Dad checks his watch as I let my Mom rub my back. It actually feels kind of good, so I don't mind that she insists on doing it non stop. "About twelve hours."

"Twelve hours is half a day," I point out flatly.

My parents keep looking at me like they're waiting for me to freak out and wail about the room in my misery. Mom had received a letter in the morning from some Order member who let her know that Draco, Pansy, Harry, and George had all been on a mission that should have only taken a couple of hours...but none of them returned to their posts.

With the recent Death Eater uprisings, it has everyone fearing the worst.

"They've been trained," my dad says like it would put me at ease. "They know what to do in a crisis."

Right.

They had heard that Petunia Dursley was still alive and she was living in some Death Eater's house in London. The Death Eater was dead, but Mrs. Dursley was still unable to leave because of the magic that kept her in. That information was what pulled Harry away from me after the movies... it was what kept Draco from coming back to our room.

It was supposed to be quick and easy.

No one has heard anything from them since they left.

I don't know how I feel.

"I'm sure it will be okay..." My mom adds for the millionth time as she squeezes me like I was crying... but I'm not crying... I just keep staring at the wall."Those four kids... they're so good with magic and the best are out there looking for them. They'll be fine. I've never even seen some of the curses those kids use."

"Kids," I say with a head nod. "They are kids. Why did you let them go anywhere?" I snap and sound hateful, but I can't help it. "They shouldn't have gone."

No one says anything to that and I inhale a shaking breath. Most of my morning was spent in my parents quarters, curled up on their bed like a cat and complaining about how unfair life is.

I'm annoying, I know that.

Ron and Hermione left the hotel hours ago to meet at some Order base in London. My mother discouraged from going and told me that the stress would be too much for me and the baby. She told me that I needed to wait and stay calm until more information came to light on the matter.

Once again I find myself being completely useless.

"All of them are full fledged members of the Order," My father says after a long pause. "They're all of age."

He said that like it was an explanation and I crinkle my nose. I go to stand up, pushing myself up awkwardly as I try to get to my feet. My Mom stands with me like I was an old person that needed assistance.

"I'm going to get something from my room," I tell them so they won't follow.

I want my notebook.

I just want to hold it. That's weird, right?

"Of course, dear," My mom smooths back my hair and Dad nods his his head. When I leave their room, I know as soon as I close the door that they're going to start talking about me.

They're worried. I know they are. Why can't I ever just have something nice? Why does everything horrible happen around me? What will I do when I'm by myself? What awful things will go through my mind?

They couldn't even imagine.

When I get to the room that I share with Draco, I sit down heavily on the bed and run my hand over his pillow. I don't know what to do, so I take out my notebook and I just pet the cover like it would put me at ease. I guess it does in a way.

Sometimes when things happen, I can't seem to move or think properly. This is one of those moments and I keep on staring at the wall ahead of me as I stroke my notebook, my thoughts blank and uninspired until I start thinking of awful dark things that lurk in the corners of my mind.

I think of dead bodies and fires and snakes and the absence of hope.

Of course I think the worst because I've learned to always expect the worst possible outcome.

They could be dead.

_He_ could be dead.

_Dead..._

If that was true, I don't know how I'd ever survive it. I would just curl up in a corner and cease to exist. I should have just done that from the start... then none of this would have happened.

As I'm petting the cover of my notebook, lost in my own horrible thoughts, my door slams open. I jump to my feet in defense, but when I see Narcissa Malfoy standing there in all her witch finery with three house-elves around her, I let myself relax.

A little.

"Mrs. Malfoy..."

"Take everything that does not belong to the hotel," she says as she looks around the room with her nose tilted in the air. The elves start to it, opening the wardrobe and drawers to pull out clothes and other personal belongings. "Pack it nicely," she adds, sending a sharp look to the old elf that's stuffing my clothes into a wooden trunk with out care.

He gives her a bashful look before carefully folding the rest of the garments in a neat little pile.

"What is this?" I ask worriedly.

When we first came to the hotel, there were rules we had to adhere to. No cloaks. No wands. No magical creatures. No magic. Mrs. Malfoy is standing there in an emerald green cloak with an intricate silver clasp that's covering a very elaborate purple dress that no muggle would ever wear. She has her wand out and she's shouting spells at random things in the room to help the elves along.

Successfully breaking all the rules in one go.

"You have been here too long," she says as she watches me put a protective hand on my belly. Her eyes flick down my body before they find my face again. "No grandson of mine will be born around so many muggle devices."

She glares around the room again, focusing most of her rage on the television.

"He could come out a squib if you're not careful. You can't be around all of this muggle technology."

"I don't think that's true," I admit and her eyes snap to mine.

I gulp and look away.

"We're a family now, Ginevra," she says as the elves flit around me, packing everything that I own in trunks. "And families stick together. I've set up a room for you at our home at Yellow Springs. It's close to your old family farm. I think you'll like it," she adds and I frown because that makes me think of the burrow... how it was destroyed beyond repair. "You'll be safer with actual magical wards than in this foul place."

"Wards have not saved me at all," I point out softly, but she pretends like she didn't hear me.

"Is there anything the elves missed that you would like to pack?" she asks as she pockets her wand. "I don't foresee us coming back here." She checks her watch. "Jonathan is pulling the car around so there isn't much time to dally."

I feel a little blind sided and I blink a few times with my mouth opening and closing before shaking my head. "I can't.. I can't just go with you right now," I say softly and she tilts her chin up. "I mean... my family is here... my friends... we're all waiting for..."

"For what?" she asks sharply. "For the Order to run in and save my son when it's their fault he was captured in the first place!"

"Captured?" I say with my brows furrowed.

Of course, I knew it was possible, but I was still holding out the hope that they would just come waltzing in at any moment. Even my Mom encouraged those thoughts and told me this could all be a misunderstanding.

Mrs. Malfoy inhales a deep breath and flicks her hair over her shoulder like she was upset that she let herself get so flustered.

"Yes," she says seriously. "Unlike your parents, I will not lie to you. Draco and the others are not merely lost because of misplaced directions. A fraction of Voldemort Loyalist had picked them up somewhere in London. They could be dead... they're probably dead," she adds with her tone sounding a little bit softer. "We're family now," she says as she walks towards me and grabs my hands. "We're Malfoys and that trumps all."

"Um..." That's all I say like an idiot and her hands tighten around my mine.

"You are all the family I have now," she says and then she presses her open palm to my stomach. "This is the only family I have," she says softly as she searches my eyes.

I look down and lick my lips. She's right, of course. I know that Draco's grandparents... her mother and father, had died years ago and this war had taken away her sister and husband and father-in-law... and now maybe even her son...

I had lost a lot during this war too... almost too many to name but I still had people to surround myself with. I still had my parents and some family members. I still had friends and people who loved me.

What did Narcissa Malfoy have?

The sad answer was me.

Just me... and that had to be depressing as hell for her because I wasn't much.

I look at her again as she looks over my face, trying to weigh my reaction. I can see Draco in her expression... in her mannerisms and the shape of her eyes.

"Please?" she asks with her eyes starting to get wet with tears. "This would mean the world to me."

She's a manipulator just like Draco... and I am an easy target because as soon as she let a tear drop, I knew I would do what she wanted me to.

"Okay," I nod my head and a beautiful smile stretches across her face. "Okay," I say again. I go towards Draco's leather satchel that's sitting on one of the chairs. "Just let me get a few things," I answer and I can spy a smile curling the corner of her mouth as I pack the things the elves forgot.

My notebook. Draco's folders. Hermione's book...

"You are a wonderful girl, Ginevra," she says as I stuff a few quills in the bag.

"Call me Ginny," I tell her softly.

I hate my full name.

"Why do you hate it? It's so lovely," she says and I snap her a look.

I know I didn't say that out loud and when she smiles at me again with tears shining in her eyes, I throw up every mind shield Draco ever taught me.

I put the satchel over my shoulder and look around the room for one final sweep before looking back to her. "Let me just tell my parents."

"No time," she waves a dismissive hand as she grabs my arm. "You can write them a letter once we're settled."

"I don't know if..."

"Hush now," she says and I snap my mouth shut when we get into the hallway.

She's just like Draco in that front too, only _hush now_ is much more polite than _shut up_.

She starts walking us out of the hotel as she uses her wand to confound random muggles that we pass in the hallway. On the elevator, she even knocks out a bell hop who seemed to be a little bit frightened by the house-elves and floating trunks.

I feel really guilty on all counts.

I pause a second in the main hall of the hotel and I look behind me. "I should tell my parents."

She acts like she didn't hear me and then she has one of the elves retrieve me. The poor creature grabs my wrist and I let myself get pulled to a large black car.

"I should tell my Mom and Dad," I say a little louder with a frown as I look back at the hotel again, imagining what my poor parents would do if they found my room empty.

"I'll send an elf to give word," she says, snapping at one of the creatures until it pops away. "Then you can send a letter to reassure, yes?"

I nod my head, feeling wrong in agreeing. The car ride is short and I play with the key around my neck as the muggle city passes by us. We stop on a country road outside of the town to Apparate and Mrs. Malfoy grabs my arm to take us to Yellow Springs. When we land, I stare at the large estate in the distance and feel awful for leaving my parents the way that I did.

"Don't look so sad," she says as she punches a password into the key pad on the gate. "I told you that you can write a letter once we're settled."

I don't say anything to that.

When we get inside the Malfoy's large summer home, Narcissa starts barking orders at the elves. Sending them to this room and that room to do this and to do that... I lean against the wall with my hand against a door frame, chewing on my lower lip until it starts bleeding again.

"Dear, are you alright?" she asks when she finally stops commanding her servants to look at me.

"Do you know where Draco is?" I ask softly.

"I suspect if he is still alive, then he would be held at Hogwarts," she says. "I hear they had a hell of a time at the beginning. The ghosts kept rebelling against the Death Eaters... but they've gotten it under control now."

I lick my lips, ridding it of the blood that lingers. "Can't we... isn't anyone going to get them?"

She gives me a sharp look with her iced blue eyes narrowed in thought.

"The wards they have set up were put in place by Voldemort himself," she says and I nearly shiver at the name. "They are too strong to simply just walk in...You shouldn't think of such things," she says, walking towards me and taking out her wand to heal my lip. "You are sharing your body with another little wizard now," she says, touching my stomach briefly after waving her wand in front of my face to close the self inflicted wound. "You must be smart about the things you choose to do and think about now."

Right.

She shows me to my room after that and leaves me to write the letter to my parents. I start and stop five times before looking out the window. It's a room at the front of the house that faces the rest of Yellow Springs. A lot of the houses are burned to the ground but a few are still standing.

One of them being the Zabini summer home where Draco had stayed when I was with Lord Voldemort.

Blaise.

"Ginevra," I glance over my shoulder when Mrs. Malfoy says my name. She's standing in the doorway, her purple dress looks dazzling in the sunlight. "Come. Let's eat something. It is no good to go about hungry in your condition."

I nod and jot down a quick note for the house-elf to send out before following Mrs. Malfoy from the room. I go to the table, but I don't eat anything. I just push around my food with the fork, but Narcissa doesn't say a word to me... because she's doing the exact same thing.

"Have you thought about baby names?" she asks after a long and silent hour.

I shake my head and she frowns.

"You and Draco have not spoken about it?"

Thinking of Draco makes me sad and I look at my plate.

"Not really," I admit and she purses her lips.

"You are aware that Draco is the last male with the Malfoy name." I nod my head. "And you are having a son to carry on that legacy." I nod again. "He needs a proper wizards name. Not something common and muggle sounding."

I nod just to get her to stop talking.

"There are books I can bring you," she says. "Of course, you can name your child whatever you like, but I would greatly stress giving him a regal name. As a Malfoy there will be certain expectations of him and he can't exactly go around being named Bob Malfoy or anything ridiculous like that.

Bob Malfoy. That just sounds wrong.

"What about Charles?" I ask, just to test the waters and when she makes a face, I feel a very angry pulse go through my heart. "It was my brother's name," I say softly.

"Oh, well... your family is known for giving their magical children muggle names. I would suggest not doing that."

I don't even bother saying anything else.

After a very awkward dinner, Mrs. Malfoy gives me a quick tour of the place. I actually know most of the rooms because I had been here last summer... but I doubt she knew that because she was never around.

She urges me to go to bed early but, of course, I can't sleep.

I just can't.

I feel like I should do something... but maybe Mrs. Malfoy is right. I look down at my stomach again and sigh loudly. I'm not the only one in my body anymore.

I go back to the writing desk and take a seat, looking out at the once posh neighborhood that the war had destroyed... I look towards Zabini's 's one light on upstairs, burning yellow against the night time sky. It's Zabini's bedroom. I know he's home and I resist going to him because I would have nothing to say.

He's just the closest thing to Draco that I could have right now.

I wonder if he's sad too. Draco was his friend and Pansy... he has to have some feeling towards her. I wonder if he's as worried as I am.

"Miss?"

I nearly jump out of the skin when the elf pops in beside me and I put my hand on my heart.

"What is it?" I ask, thinking the worst as the elf holds out a vial of glowing blue liquid.

"The mistress says yous to take this," the elf tells me as he stuffs it in my hand. His ancient face is wrinkled with time and hard labor. "She says stress isn't good for the baby and you is to relax."

_Relax_. Like that would ever be possible.

"The mistress insists!" he squeaks loudly after I hesitate. "She says that Alba is not to leave the room until the miss drinks."

Well,_ great._

I don't move right away and the poor elf gives me a pleading look with his large eyes shining in the candle light..I sigh loudly before taking the cork out and downing the potion quickly. Whatever. It doesn't even matter. The elf smiles and takes the vial from me before popping away.

I scoot back on the bed and pull out my notebook, but I stop when I open Draco's satchel and I decide on Hermione's book instead.

I look over Draco's note and read it a few times.

_You are loved and you are mine. _

My eyes start to droop from the effects of the potions.

_It is better reign in hell... then serve in heaven._

The book slips from my fingers and I fall asleep hard and fast with images of Draco in black armor like Hades coming from the earth in a blood red chariot.

I wake early in the morning to an odd noise and I crack my eyes open only to see the same house-elf who had me drink the potion last night bustling about the room in a great hurry like he was on some kind of schedule. I clear my throat when he lays an orange dress on a nearby chair and then he turns my way quickly with his ancient brows up in surprise.

"The miss is up," he says, giving me an uncomfortable smile. I push myself up and rub my head. "I ran a bath!" he squeaks proudly, rolling on his toes like he was really pleased with himself. It makes me miss Franklin's nastiness, to be honest. "And laid out clothes," he adds, showing me the pile where he put a bra, yellow knickers, and a pair of white bobby socks. "The mistress was very particular in her demands."

"Oh," I say as I pull myself to my feet.

I walk towards the orange dress and run my fingers over the soft fabric.

"This isn't mine," I admit softly and the elf nods his head.

"The mistress sent out for clothes this morning," the elf named Alba answers. I sort through the undergarments. These aren't mine either. "Just for the miss," he says proudly, beaming at me from ear to floppy ear.

"What's wrong with my old clothes from the hotel?" I ask softly and the elf blinks a few times.

"They is being washed."

Oh.

"Thank you," I tell him, not sure how I feel as I make my way towards the bathroom where steam is floating towards the ceiling. "Do you have any shorts?" I ask, stopping short and turning around when I realize that is something I want. The elf tilts his old head to the side in question. "So I can wear them under the dress," I explain quickly.

The elf still looks confused and I sigh before going into my explanation on why I want to wear shorts.

"My thighs rub together," I admit and the elf blinks a few times. "And after a while, it hurts."

He furrows his brows before popping out of the room. I wait a moment, but when he doesn't return, I figure I won't be getting any shorts today. I guess I'll have to manage. I go into the washroom and use the alone time to take a long bath.

The water helps clear my head as I clean my body and hair with expensive shampoos and soaps. The smells of lavender and vanilla are really relaxing and for a moment I nearly forget why I'm so sad in the first place. I stay in the tub until the water turns cold and I dry quickly, using a white fluffy towel that feels wonderful against my skin.

There's a terry cloth robe hanging on the door and I put that on before walking into the bedroom with my hair wet and dripping on the floor. I find a pair of navy shorts laying on top of the knickers and I smile to myself as I pick them up.

"Thank you, Alba," I whisper before getting dressed.

The dress looks polished and it fits me very well with plenty of room to breathe. I fold down the top of the socks and look around for a pair of shoes. I find a pair of brown wingtip oxfords by the bed and they fit just as perfectly. Of course. It's like someone took my measurements while I was asleep and that thought is kind of disturbing.

Disturbing because it probably happened.

I pause a moment to look at myself in the mirror after I braid my wet hair. Ruth Davenport dressed me as a little version of herself in tighter skirts and trendy silk blouses. Mrs. Malfoy seemed to be doing the same with a tailored dress in a retro cut and classic footwear.

My identity was again getting lost in other people's ideas of how I should look.

I don't even care.

I make my way downstairs and find Mrs. Malfoy in the breakfast nook, eating a grapefruit with a silver spoon as she reads the paper.

"Good morning," she says, giving me a tired smile as she motions to the seat beside her. "I hope you were able to rest."

"That potion worked very well," I admit. "Thank you," I add as I blink at her. "And thanks for the clothes. They fit very well."

"Yes," she smiles at me. "Don't mention it."

"Has there been... any news?" I ask, looking at the paper.

She shakes her head and takes a drink from her coffee as oatmeal and peaches appears on the plate in front of me. "The Order has sent an owl to Yaxley's base in hopes of bargaining with him. If he's smart, he will agree to their terms. It's the only way he will make it out of that castle alive."

I don't say anything. I just pick up the spoon and push food around, taking little bites so I don't die of starvation. The food tastes like cardboard and is not appetizing.

"Did my mother write back?" I ask softly and she nods, handing me a letter.

I open it and scan the pages wearyingly. Of course she's upset and I could tell she was yelling at me in her letter. Which is a very hard thing to do through handwriting without looking like a lunatic but my mother was doing it surprisingly well. I'm surprised she didn't send me a howler, but being surrounded by so many muggle things, she probably couldn't muster up the magic.

I put the letter on the table and take a drink of milk as Narcissa Malfoy watches my every move like a hawk.

"I imagine your family is not very happy?" she questions and I shake my head.

"Not at all," I admit, playing with the key around my neck again.

If she's anything like her son, she probably read the letter before I did.

"Well, it's not like you won't get to see her. You will be safer here by far and I'm sure she will come to understand that."

I nod and take another sip from my glass.

"I have something I thought you would enjoy seeing," she says, snapping her fingers until a house-elf appears with a large leather bound book.

She takes it from the elf and hands it to me. I raise a questioning eyebrow.

"I'm finding myself very sentimental," she says as I open it to the first page. "I started looking at this after you retired for the evening and thought you may like to see it."

It's a scrapbook of Draco's life. From the time he was a baby all the way up until now... before the war started. There's a photo of Narcissa holding him as a newborn and another of him as a chubby baby with blond hair crawling around Lucius Malfoy's chair. It warmed my heart to see him as such a cute little thing.

The book is well documented with every major milestone and birthday perfectly recorded and categorized in a neat little package.

There are dates and descriptions and mementos held within the green pages. Like baby fine hair from his first hair cut and fingerprints from when he was five years old. There are photos of Christmas toys that made him beam in happiness and summers at the lake where his skin almost looked tan. _Almost_. Pictures of friends and horses and games and swim meets and little league Quidditch teams...

Draco was loved.

That much is obvious and I can't help but smile a little to myself to see him look so normal and happy and just like a boy should be. It's hard to think of the Draco I know now as such a carefree little child who did regular things.

"He was such a sweet baby," Narcissa says as I keep flipping through the pages. "We didn't have to have anymore children after him," she adds, sipping her coffee. "Perfected it on the first try."

I give her a little smile and go back to the pages.

Halfway into the book, I see a picture of Abraxas Malfoy in his wheelchair. I pause for a second to admire the older Malfoy who Peter Pettigrew had murdered and I feel something heavy settle on my chest when I remember that he died trying to help me.

Sitting on the couch beside his chair is a very regal looking man in a three piece suit. There's a cane resting against his side and the marble top has a wolf carved into it.

He was older, like the elder Mr. Malfoy, and his skin was very dark... almost as dark as his coal eyes that reflected the light of the fire nearby. I look underneath the photo for the caption. This was taken during Draco's fourth birthday and the two gentlemen in the picture are listed by their names in neatly written cursive.

There was Abraxas Malfoy, of course, which also held the title of _grandfather _before his name and beside that was the name Carmine Zabini.

Zabini.

Blaise's father.

I quickly go back to the photo to study the man with a closer eye. Carmine Zabini, world renowned healer, was an imposing looking man. Even in his advanced age his eyes were sharp and heavily lidded as he smirked at something off in the distance like it was mildly amusing, but only just.

He didn't look like Blaise.

To be honest, Blaise's ethnicity was always a mystery to me that I never quite figured it out. Not that it mattered, of course, but it was always there to wonder about. I knew that his mother had the same look that could be taken a million different ways, but his father was clearly black and had very dominant features that Blaise didn't seem to inherit.

It's kind of confusing, actually.

Carmine Zabini was a tall man in life. I could tell just by looking at his legs as he sat. His head was clean shaven and his limbs were thick and muscled like a tree trunk. A violent looking scar ran from the top of his forehead all the way down to his jaw, leaving a streak through his left eye and a cleft in his eyebrow. I wonder if he got that fighting for the Dark Lord...

He looked like a warrior in a waist coat.

"Ginevra."

Mrs. Malfoy says my name, so I pull myself away from the picture to be polite.

"You are studying that photo very hard," she says sharply. "Do you have any questions or are you just admiring the camera angle?"

"Oh... it's just.. I was looking at Blaise's dad," I admit. "How did he... How did he die?" I ask because he just looked so fierce and so strong, even at his age. "Did Ruth Davenport really poison him?"

"She's never went to jail for it," she says as she grabs the book to take it away from me.

That's all she says... and a silence hangs in the air before an elf comes in to drop off a note.

"Excuse me," she says as she gets out of her seat after reading it. "I have a floo call I have to take."

She leaves the room with the photo album and I stare at my food for a few moments before I start thinking of Draco and how terrible his world must be right now. I can't stay idle any longer. I need to get up... I need to move.

I decide to go back upstairs to get my notebook, but I stop when I see Hermione's book resting on the nightstand. I grab it and flip through the pages until I find what I want.

_You are loved and you are mine._

I rip the page out and fold it into a small square, stuffing it in my pocket.

_You are loved._

I rub my face before leaving my designated room and moving down the hall. I don't stop until I reach the bedroom I had slept in with Draco over a year ago... when I was still unsure and so naïve about everything.

I open his door and peak my head inside.

Everything looks immaculate and clean. I doubt he stayed here much and I chew on my lip as I step into the room. There aren't any clothes in his closet or in the drawers, but Narcissa had left the trunk of his things that she had taken from the hotel at the foot of the bed... like they were awaiting his arrival.

I go over to the trunk and pull out one of his wool jumpers that he would only wear during the night when it got too chilly to bear.

It still smells like him.

I bundle it in my hands and bring it up to my face to inhale against the fabric. I hold it there for a while, comforted by the familiar scent, as I walk towards his desk. Of course, that's fairly bare as well because this was a room he rarely lived in, but there was a book about fishing on his desk top. I pick it up and flip through it because I have nothing else to do and by touching his things, I feel closer to him.

Something falls out.

A little bit of paper glides to the floor and lands by my feet. I bend down to pick it up and I lower Draco's jumper so I can read it properly.

What I see makes my heart stop.

It's just a name.

One simple name...

The name of a pureblooded family that the Dark Lord had all but wiped out.

The name of my Grandfather and uncles who had perished in the first war.

My mother's maiden name.

Written on the same bit of paper I had given Draco over a year ago so he could come into my house.

The piece of paper he swore he gave back.

The ward password to the burrow.

_Prewett..._

I drop his jumper and leave the room.

I keep walking, walking and walking and walking until I find myself going out the back door, headed towards the dock. It's a place that holds pleasant memories for me... memories of a budding relationship before the world got too twisted.

I take my shoes off and then stuff the bobby socks inside them before taking a seat. I dip my feet into the cool water and nearly smile when I ripple my toes against the surface. I remember watching Draco swim in this lake, his body moving like a shark in the water. I remember his smiles and sweet kissing and gentle words.

They seem to take president over everything else and I don't realize I'm crying until footsteps shake me out of my thoughts.

I move quickly, pulling my feet from the water and turning around to face the intruder. When I see Blaise Zabini standing there with his hands in the pockets of his jeans, I exhale slowly with my hand on my heart.

"You frightened me," I admit. I turn back to lake and sit back down at the edge of the dock.

"I have that effect on most people," he jokes. He walks up beside me as I quickly wipe unwanted tears away.

I watch from the corner of my eyes as he takes off his shoes and then he sits down, leaving only an inch of space between us.

"What are you doing?" I ask softly, pushing hair behind my ear as I glance his way.

"I heard you were here," he says with a shrug as he rolls up his pant legs so he can put his feet in the water. "The wards always let me in, no matter how annoyed Mrs. Malfoy gets."

He smirks at that and I face forward.

"I was just thinking about you," I admit to him and he looks surprised. "Mrs. Malfoy had a photo album she was showing me. It had a picture of your father in it."

"Did it now?" he asks, a brow up as he studies my face. "And what did you think?"

"He didn't look how I imagined," I tell him honestly as I start paddling my feel to make waves in the water.

"How did you expect him to look?" he asks and I look his way, taking in his handsome features again...He looks like his mother, but there was still a sharpness to his features that I don't think he got from either parent... and his coloring was still too light to make sense.

It doesn't really matter, though, and I shrug.

"I don't know," I reply as I bring a hand up so I can chew on my nails. "Do you think... Do you think they're dead?" I whisper softly, knowing Blaise would be the one to tell me the truth.

"No," he says seriously and I feel a sigh of relief leave my lips. "Maybe your brother is," he adds and my heart tightens at the thought. "Pansy too. They have no use to the Death Eater's and are of no importance."

"They're important to me," I say sharply and he gives me a look.

"Let's be practical," he answers as he leans in close. "Harry is the face of the resistance and Draco is the richest wizard in England. What would George Weasley or Pansy Parkinson have to offer?"

That realization sinks in painfully and my eyes well with tears so I turn away quickly.

"I'm sorry," he says softly. "I forget how easily you cry."

"So, Harry and Draco... they would keep them alive for sure right?" I ask, my voice sounding hopeful even though all I want to do is curl up and cry.

"Alive maybe, but what's left of the Death Eaters are not the most stable people. Draco wasn't only a traitor to our bloodlines, but a traitor to the Dark Lord. They will make him pay for that and it will not be pretty."

I cover my mouth as I think about the torture that they could inflict and the cry gets stuck in my throat as Zabini puts his arm around my shoulder like he wanted to comfort me. How could he comfort me after saying something like? I push his hand away and crunch the paper up in my hand until my fingernails cut into my palm.

He doesn't say anything for a while and neither do I...

"What do you have there?" he asks, grabbing the password from me and smoothing it out.

"I found it in Draco's room," I admit. "It's the ward password to the Burrow... to my home... He told me he gave it back. He was certain he did." I frown and kick my feet against the water again. "He must have misplaced it," I say to myself, but Zabini hears it.

"Maybe he did," he says. "But when have you known Draco to misplace anything?" I frown, giving him a sideways look from the corner of my eyes. "Maybe he gave the password to the Death Eaters."

"He wouldn't do that," I hiss, my vice dark. "He wouldn't compromise my family like that."

"You know he would," he says flatly. "You just have to figure out what truth you want to believe. After all, lies are only lies when you don't believe them."

I'm not sure there's any sound logic to that, but I don't say anything.

"Let's just pretend for a moment that we knew for certain that he gave the password away. The important question is why," he says, studying my face with a critical eye. "Why would Draco give your ward password to the Death Eater's, knowing full well that your family was on Lord Voldemort's most wanted list?"

I don't know the answer to that.

"Maybe it was because he knew that Azkaban would be safer for your family. Maybe he knew that the probability of them dying in the field was far greater the longer they waited and maybe he knew that they wouldn't be executed in prison."

"Maybe," I say, willing to accept that answer if it was true.

"Or," he says, pausing for dramatic effect. "Maybe he wanted them out of the way so no one would try to pull you out of school. Maybe he wanted it so no Weasley's were out there to come after you."

"Maybe he just forgot about it," I reply sharply, hating his words.

"That is a possibility... a very slim one," he answers, nudging my arm. "After all, isolating you is the best way to control you, isn't it? Just ask Narcissa Malfoy," he adds, nodding behind us to the large house in the distance. "She is very similar to her son in that regard."

"What are you talking about?" I say sharply. "Narcissa has no one else. She's all alone..."

"Is that what she told you?" he asks, giving me a sad look like I was a stupid child who just didn't know any better. "If something happens to Draco—who is the main beneficiary to the Malfoy estates?" he asks and my face snaps to his."It's not her anymore. Lucius Malfoy left all of it to his favorite son. With the stipulation that he take care of his mother and leave her with a very hefty allowance. There was no such clause in the contract you signed. Imagine what's going through her mind right now."

He reaches into his pocket to take out a cigarette as he eyes the golden key around my neck.

"If Draco dies, the largest fortune in England is going to be left to a blood traitor from an inferior family. Just imagine how awful her thoughts are towards you right now... especially since you're carrying a child out of wedlock."

My cheeks heat and I look away, almost horrified by what Narcissa Malfoy must think of me.

"I'm sure that's not true," I whisper. "She... no... Why would you say that?" I ask him sharply, putting the blame of my confused thoughts on him.

"I like the way your mind works," he says, giving me a fond kind of smile that I hate. "I truly do. It is a rare thing to be so sweet and optimistic, even after all you've been through. If only you could be so optimistic about me," he says seriously, a pouting frown on his lips. "But I suppose I am the exception to your rule... A part of me never wants you to lose that sweetness, but unfortunately it has disabled you in your dealings with my kind of people."

"Your kind of people," I reply with a brow arched.

"Yes," he answers. "My kind. It's not that I think you can't play the game," he admits as he puts the cigarette to his lips. "I just think you brought the wrong equipment to the field."

"What's the point of telling me any of this?" I ask tiredly, tilting my face towards the sun. "Besides you just wanting to confuse me... mess up my thoughts."

He uses his wand to light his cigarette and I glance at him as the smoke curls into the air.

"I want to prepare you for what I want to say."

"What is it?" I ask softly, not sure if I want to hear him.

"What if they don't make it out alive?" I look at him, almost ready to yell. Wanting to demand why he would say such a thing, but he holds up his hand. "But most importantly, what if they do? I am all for opportunities," he says, turning to touch me, but I pull back. "This is our only get out of jail free card."

"What-"

"I've been thinking that you and I could leave England. We could leave all this behind..."

He starts talking. Words that fold and mix together and I just stare at him with wide eyes, hardly believing this is real.

"...and I'm of age so I've come into my inheritance. I no longer need to rely on my mother and if something does happen to Draco, you will have a very fine fortune yourself. In fact," he says, reaching out to touch the key. "You could take a very large sum right now and no one would be the wiser."

"What are you talking about?" I ask in disbelief, struggling to my feet because I can't finish this conversation sitting down. "We're not going anywhere. Especially not together. Draco is your friend... and what about Pansy? What is wrong with you?"

"Nothing is wrong with me. I'm just weighing my options and this is a route we both could take. It could work out for us. The blood that binds us is strong, but this is a small window we can jump out of now. I know it could work. We could-"

"There is no we!" I shout. "I love Draco."

"And his love comes at a higher cost," he says darkly. "You can't have the girl and the world too, Ginny. Which one do you think he is more willing to give up? My ambitions aren't half as strong as his. I don't need the world. You and I..."

I shake my head.

"You and I," he repeats firmly. "We could build something far away from this. You could love me. I know you could. If you can love him, you can sure as hell love me. I know it."

"I don't love you."

He pauses for a second before flicking his cigarette into the water and taking a step closer to me.

"You liked kissing me. Don't even lie and say you didn't. I know you did. I could tell you did. Why is Draco the only one who gets to be redeemed? Why does he get forgiveness from all his evils just because you love him? Why does he get that from you? Who cares if you never love me? You could try," he says as he grabs my arm. "Your kindness would eventually break you and you would see what a wounded beast I truly am and you will find yourself loving me as you love him."

"Get off," I try to push his hands off me, nearly seething in anger.

"I'm older than Draco, by a few months, actually," he says, his grip firm on my arm. "I think you'll find I could be a good substitute," he says, glancing down at my stomach. "My father loved me when he didn't have to," he adds, and I think that was an odd thing to say. "It could work."

"Get away from me," I push him back and he stumbles, only to catch himself before he falls into the lake.

"I will not force you... I will not trick you into this," he say sharply, running a hand through his dark hair and making it messy. "Can you not see what this could be?"

"How could you even think this way? Don't you care for anyone but yourself?"

"Maybe I care for you. I could, you know. I am capable of that no matter what people think," he says flatly and I shake my head because if he did, he never would have brought this up. "Draco does love you and I've been wrestling with myself all year with that knowledge. In fact, it's his love that has put him this situation and you know that he will not allow that to happen again."

I push him away again and grab my shoes, stuffing my feet into them with out bothering with the socks.

"And maybe I saw you first," he says as I tie them quickly. I see him fumbling with his own shoes as I hurry. "Maybe I saw you before the Dark Lord started saying your name and maybe Draco didn't care. What do you think of that?"

"I don't think anything," I tell him harshly, wanting to hurt his feelings but it doesn't seem to deter him.

"What will happen ten years down the road? Have you thought of that? You never ask yourself_ and_ _then what._ That's your main character flaw. _Then what._ If you asked that question more often, you wouldn't get in half as much trouble as you do. You love Draco, he comes back... _and then what_? Do you think he'll be as warm with you as he has been once the honeymoon faze has worn off? Trust me, the laughs and smiles and kisses and touches are not in his character and tigers do not change their stripes so easily. Especially not for a girl. Not even for you, Ginny."

"I know how Draco is," I snap, because I do. I knew it all too well. "I know he can be mean. I know he can be impatient and cruel and cold, but there are many sides to one person. You don't know everything."

"Let's look at this year from a clear perspective then, shall we," he says, taking out his wand as I take a step back. He points to the water, swishing his hand until a bright light flows from the tip. "Not long after Lord Voldemort came back, he started saying your name quite often to his inner circle."

He tilts his wand up and an image of the Dark Lord flashes in front of us, making me retract and look away as memories rise to the surface.

"Who do we know who was in his inner circle?" he asks with a brow up, shooting another image into the air. "Lucius Malfoy," he says as the older Malfoy smirks at us from above the lake. "With as unhappy as the Malfoy's were with Voldemort's return, if it was known that your blood would make him more powerful, can you imagine the things they spoke about?"

I refuse to reply and he keeps going, shooting an image of Draco into the air.

"Now Draco, Draco knew that he had a claim to you from some ancient bloodline bullshit. Suddenly he's interested in cashing that check after so many years. You know why," he says flatly. "He didn't expect to like you so much and I think once he realized what the Dark Lord had planned for you-"

"This isn't new to me," I cut him off quickly, staring at the shining buttons his shirt as the images fade. "They used me, I know that... but Draco and I are in love and..."

"And what if Draco could have gotten you away from the Dark Lord after you were caught? Have you asked yourself that question? I was able to bribe a house-elf into giving you Henry, why wasn't he able to do something similar... why wouldn't he let me?" He looks at my stomach again. "Did he want the Dark Lord to do that to you?" he asks, making a motion to my middle and I inhale a sharp breath because I thought Draco was the only one who knew the truth of what happened to me. "Why would he? Would it be beneficial in the long run?" he asks before continuing. "When the seventh moon is in the second house," he says as my insides turn and my brain starts pulsing. "A powerful union between the two families..."

I can't let him finish. I bring my hand up and swiftly smack him across the face. It rings loudly in my ears and birds fly from the branch of a tree nearby.

I pull back quickly and cover my mouth when he turns his head to give me an awful glare. An awful glare that I deserve because I know how terrible it feels to be hit like that... but my anger is too great and I couldn't let him finish what he was implying.

It was too evil. Even for him.

He touches his face that's starting to flower in a violent red hand print across his right cheek. He licks his teeth once before dropping his hand and narrowing his amber eyes.

"If Draco survives this, you'll build a life with him. One day you'll open your eyes and find out he's turned into everything you hate. Which of your convictions will hold you after you're in too deep? Will you fight against him, or burn the world by his side?"

"I thought you wanted what he wanted. I thought you believed the same things."

"I do," he says seriously, he jaw clenched in anger. "But maybe I don't want to fight for it anymore. He has led me down a path that I can't seem to get off of and I'm tired," he says, his hand on his chest. "I am fucking tired of it."

I hesitate a second before I remember something he told me... something from long ago where he admitted he always liked taking things from Draco.

"You're just doing this to hurt him," I say seriously, frowning as he shakes his head. "You're very sneaky in the ways you do it, but you're always out to hurt Draco."

"Maybe he deserves it," he says sharply. "Have you ever thought of that? Of course not. You still view him through rose colored glasses. It's not like he doesn't hurt everyone around him, Ginny. You've seen how he deals with his anger," he adds darkly. "And you have adopted his views," he spits out, touching his hurt cheek again. "I've suffered more broken bones from his wand than I would care to admit and so what if I go out of my way to hurt his feelings every once in a while? That's minor and has nothing to do with this"

"You were the one who gave that message that Harry," I say, putting my hands on my back as I try to piece this together. "Did you know... Did you intend for them to get caught?"

"No," he shakes his head quickly. "There is no way I could have orchestrated that... but maybe Draco did."

"What?" I ask flatly.

"I know you'll believe whatever you want, but what if Draco wanted Harry out of the way." I shake my head. "There are multiple motives for him to want that. If Potter died, then Draco would be the big hero of the war... a spy who helped the order and fell in love with a Weasley. Could you imagine how well that would sell to the public? But Potter's the favorite and would continue to get all the glory. If he decided to go into politics, Draco would have no chance in beating him fairly in an open election, especially with his beliefs being as they are."

"That doesn't..."

"Doesn't what?" he asks. "Doesn't make sense? Of course it does, and to top it off, Potter is probably the biggest rival for your affections. He loved you. I think you know that because Draco could tell right off the bat."

"How would he end up captured as well?" I ask, shaking my head again.

"Maybe that's where his love for you comes into play... or maybe his guilt. He didn't know that your brother would go with Harry. That he would volunteer to help. That's how Malfoy and Pansy ended up going after them and the plan backfired... but maybe I'm lying," he says with a shrug... an infuriating shrug. "I guess it's whatever you want to believe."

"Why even tell me any of this?" I ask hatefully. "I'm in too deep now anyways... I already told Draco I was all in. There's no going back from that. I love him too much. Every time I came to you with questions, you would push me in his direction. Why are you saying any of this now? Why? Why now?"

He doesn't say anything, he just shrugs and looks at the lake.

"You can leave if you want," I tell him, playing with the page in my pocket.

_It is better to reign in hell with the person you love, than to serve in heaven with the person you don't._

I turn to walk away. Away from the dock and away from Blaise Zabini, but when he says my name, I stop and glance over my shoulder.

"There is another option I can propose," he says. His hands are stuffed into the pockets of his blue jeans and his eyes are shining gold against the sun. "Plan B, if you will. Or C... probably plan C actually. I don't think you'd like plan B. It's very similar to plan A in the sense that we both get the fuck out of here because I am tired of fucking fighting... but you'll like plan C.."

"What is it?" I ask, my jaw clenched and my posture rigid.

"It's an idea that I think you will find most pleasing. It has Ginny Weasley written all over it."

I raise my brows, waiting for him to say something of use, but he doesn't say anything for a while and he just stares at me.

I start walking away again.

"We could go and get them."

I turn to face him and he smiles when he sees the look on my face.

"See, there it is. I knew you'd like that. You're all about suicide missions, are you not? And why not? Why the fuck not?" he says with a shoulder shrug as he walks towards me. "Meet me on the dock after Mrs. Malfoy goes to sleep. She usually goes down around ten after a few glasses of wine."

Then he sighs loudly and looks at the trees.

"We're giving our freedom up. You realize that, don't you?"

I don't say anything and he comes towards me, tugging on my hair and giving me a smile I can only describe as sad.

"In any case, it's about time we use all that pent up power everyone claims that you have." He smirks, the sadness in his eyes gone so suddenly I hardly believe I saw it. "You've been pretty useless in that area, wouldn't you say?"

He goes to walk past me, his eyes narrowed and thoughtful.

"Mrs. Malfoy says that the wards are too powerful at Hogwarts," I say, my throat dry and tight. "She says that Tom put them up himself."

He blinks at me calling the Dark Lord by his real name and I blush, turning away when I realize I shouldn't have done that.

"Now that the Dark Lord is dead, you're the big dog on campus," he says, giving me another amused smile. "Didn't you know that? When we go there, we can show the Death Eater's who they truly need to fear."

He starts walking up the stairs that lead to the house, and I feel something odd settle inside of me... something close to pity.

"Blaise," I say to his retreating back and he stops on the steps to glance at me. "I'm sorry I hit you," I say honestly, the guilt finally catching up with me. "And everything else."

"Don't be," he says, his foot on a step above him as he looks me over. "Survival tip number one," he says, giving me a crooked smile. "Never be sorry about anything. Especially if you don't mean it."

"I do mean it," I admit.

"I imagine we'll have this conversation again. Only the roles will be reversed and we'll both be a lot older," he muses to himself. "But don't worry," he says gently. "I will not be so quick to say no to you and I will definitely not smack you for it."

With that he leaves and I can't find it in me to move for a very long time. His words fumble around in my mind, refusing to settle or make sense to me and I stay on the dock until Narcissa calls me from the back door. I trudge my way to the house with my head down in thought as I think of Blaise and puzzles he presents to me.

Why does he have to present everything with _maybe_ in front of it?

The day is long and uneventful with Mrs. Malfoy speaking to me of the past like she was living a memory. A pleasant memory where everyone she loved was alive and well. I feel bad for her too and around nine she sits by the fire in a living room with a bottle of wine by her side as she tells me stories of Draco's birth and how Lucius was such a doting father.

"You can't imagine how sweet it is," she says, her eyes drooping from the wine. "To see such a hardened man love something so much."

Maybe I can imagine.

Blaise was right, around ten she retires for the evening, leaving me to myself in living room. I wait until I'm sure she's asleep before I grab a black cloak and I stuff my wand in my pocket. I pause outside of Draco's bedroom door before going in and finding the wool jumper I had discarded on the floor.

I pick it up and press it to my nose again before slipping it on over my dress. The nighttime air is chilly and I like being surrounded by something that smells like Draco.

It makes me feel closer to him, no matter what evils he might have done.

Zabini is waiting for me by the dock, his face turned towards the sky as a lit cigarette burns red against the night.

"Are you sure you want to wear a dress?" he says, looking over my outfit when I approach.

"It's okay," I admit as I put on the black cloak that I had gotten at Hogwarts. It still has the Dark Mark sown into the chest and I feel like a traitor for wearing it. "I'm wearing shorts underneath."

He snorts in laughter, throwing the cigarette into the lake as he puts up the hood on his own cloak.

"Fair enough," he says. "Are you sure you're ready for this?" he asks as he studies my face. "It's not too late to turn back."

"I'm ready," I say steadily and he nods.

"Good," he whispers as he takes out his wand.

He makes a motion with his hand and I follow him up the steps and around the house. We don't stop until we reach the front gate that he pushes open.

"Any last words?" he asks as I look back at the Malfoy house like I'll never get a chance to see it again.

I shake my head. "You?" I question and he smirks, a light coming to his eyes that I have never actually seen before.

"I hope you're ready," he says, reaching out to take my arm so we can Apparate together. "Things are about to get wild."

_Wild... _

_Wild... _

_Wild... _

_Wild.. _

_Wild... _

_Wild..._

When we land outside of the castle gates, Blaise pulls away from me and stares at our old school with his eyes narrowed.

"Hogwarts is going to burn tonight," he says seriously, his tone somber and dark.

As the child moves inside of me, I can't help but think of the words that I smacked Zabini for... The words I couldn't bear to have him finish...

_When the seventh moon is in the second house, a powerful union between the two families will set the world on fire. _

Hogwarts is going to burn tonight... and I'm the one that's going to do it.


	21. Chapter 21

Hogwarts was once a place that held so much magic for me but now it's just a ruin, decaying on a cliff that still stinks of death from the prior battles. I can smell the rot all the way from here and it makes my stomach turn…I bring my hand up to cover my mouth and close my eyes for a moment as I try to get myself together.

Now is not the time to be weak.

The nighttime air is chilly, so I pull the cloak a little tighter around my body and I look at the castle through timid eyes... Large chunks of the building are completely missing and Gryffindor tower has been blasted to smithereens...It's hard seeing something I once loved so much just completely destroyed.

"It's kind of sad, isn't it?" Blaise pulls the thought from my mind as we stand just outside the ward barrier. "How the mighty have fallen."

I lick my lips and grip my wand a little tighter. My hands are sweating something fierce and my thoughts are scattered all over the place. There are a couple of lights on in the castle, and that makes me nervous...

"...Ginny?"

I shake my head. Has Blaise been talking this whole time?

"Yeah?" I ask, swallowing hard as I glance his way. His hood is drawn back and black hair is falling into his amber eyes. His good looks don't comfort me at all. They remind me too much of the demanding men in my life who have turned and twisted me beyond repair…

"I asked if you wanted to hear my plan?" he asks with a that simple Zabini smile that holds a thousand secrets. I nod my head, so he takes a step closer, pulling out a folded piece of parchment from his pocket. "This is a little treat I stole from your side of the fence," he explains as he opens up a map to the castle... where little dots with names floating beside them are moving about. "An amazing bit of magic, really. It shows every living being inside."

I take the map from him and lay it out against a tree to see. Richard Yaxley is in the great hall surrounded by other people whom I'm not familiar with... A few names I recognize as Death Eater's are mulling about the halls... but there... in Snape's old Potions lab, are _Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter, Pansy Parkinson_, and _George Weasley_.

"They're alive!" I shout and Blaise shushes me, looking around like he thought someone would curse us. "Look here," I press my finger against the parchment and nearly shove it in his face. "They're alive."

"Yes, I see that." He snatches the map away from me and folds it back into his pocket. "Now, all we have to do is break the wards and we're set."

"And then we just go in there?" I ask, looking back at the castle. "You think we can do that?"

"I think you can," he counters with a wry grin.

"What?"

"You're going to have to break the wards. I can't do it. I'm not strong enough, but I think you are. From there... well, I guess I'm just going have stand impossibly close to you the whole time so they won't kill me."

I give him a hard look and he smiles, knocking my chin up with his knuckle.

"Don't look so surprised. I don't matter. They'll kill me on site, but you... you they're going to want to hold on to for a while." I shake my head, turning away from him as he laughs. "The safest place in the world is standing right next to you," he says, reaching out to touch some of my hair. "And it's a good thing that I like you so much."

"I don't see how that could be true," I tell him as I pull away from his wondering hand. "No one is safe by me," I say because that's the cold hard truth of my life.

"Of course it's true," he says, tugging my hair so I'll look at him. "Didn't you know that? The plan is to use you as a human shield." He's smiling at me again and I can't help but roll my eyes. "I'll just shadow you all the way through the castle and throw you about when someone tries to curse me. It's a perfect plan, if I do say so myself.'

He's so smug and he wiggles his brows when we make eye contact….I turn away from him when I think about how silly he's being and I feel the corner of my mouth tilt up.

"Is that a smile I see?" he asks, tilting his chin to view the turn of my lips. "She can smile? Call the papers, we've got breaking news."

"Stop," I tell him, pushing his hand away when he tries to touch me again. This is serious and neither of us should be smiling about it.

"Why wouldn't they try to hurt me?" I ask, blinking at him as I put some hair behind my ear. "What am I to them?" I ask with a frown, sobering up quite quickly at the thought. "The Dark Lord is dead. It doesn't make sense. What if they... What if they try to curse me or something?"

"They won't," he says simply, plucking off a piece of lint from his sweater.

"How do you know?" I ask, a little too harshly as I push some hair away from my face. I'm kind of nervous and I can't stop messing with my hair. "You can't possibly know that."

"They will not want to hurt you," he answers with a sigh. "Trust me, Ginny. No one in their right mind is going to raise their wand to you."

"They're not in their right mind... They're Death Eater's."

"I thought this was what you wanted. Are we getting cold feet now?"

"No," I say quickly... too quickly, actually. "I just want to know what I'm getting into... is all," I say as I start messing with my hair again. "I want to be prepared. It's good to be prepared... Don't you think? Do you think it's good to know what we're getting into? Questions are good, right?"

I'm rambling now, but he ignores me as he picks up a nearby stick that's roughly the size of a Quidditch bat. He looks at it thoughtfully for a second before throwing it at the ward barrier with an underhanded toss. The stick freezes mid air before bursting into flames and then crumbling into nothingness.

I stare at the now empty space with my mouth slightly ajar. Blaise makes an _hmf _noise before peddling backwards and leaning against a tree with his arms crossed.

"That's nice," he says, making a motion to the now empty space where the stick once was. "Good luck with that, darling."

"You're not even going to try to help?"

"I'm here for moral support," he says, giving me a charming smile that I'm sure dropped many knickers once upon a time. "I'm your greatest cheerleader. Team Ginny all the way," he says with a fist pump before bringing that hand to his chin and tapping his fingers thoughtfully for a moment. "Hey, remember when you were an actual cheerleader?" He crosses his ankles, his oxford shoe bent at the toe. "I really liked that uniform," he says as he tilts his chin down and gives me a predatory, golden eyed, glare. "Do you think you'd ever consider wearing it again? When you're no longer knocked up, of course," he adds quickly like that would have a bearing on my decision.

I give him a disgusted look that makes him laugh.

"I guess it doesn't matter," he says with a dismissive shrug as he starts picking at his fingernails. "I have enough images to last me for the rest of my life. My spank bank is completely full… You looked like such a slut…"

"Hey," I snap, giving him an icy look as I pull the cloak around me again. "Stop saying things like that to me."

He just blinks innocently like what he just said was no where _near_ being offensive.

"What? I didn't say that you _were _a slut... I was just implying that you may have looked like one. Wasn't that the point of those things, anyways? To make you girls look like sexy slut bunnies? I would be lying if I said I didn't thoroughly enjoy it…"

"You're disgusting," I snap before turning back to the wards and tapping the wand against my thigh. "This is important," I tell him, giving him another look over my shoulder. "Stop saying things like that to me. I'm serious. I don't like it…"

How could I… After all the stuff that happened to me with Tom...

"I let you say mean things to me all the time," he counters.

"I don't say mean things to you," I hiss, putting my hand on my stomach when the baby moves. "You're just awful."

"See, that was mean," he says with a smile but I refuse to respond. The wards are making the nighttime air shimmer lightly before my eyes and I inhale a shaking breath. I have no idea what to do next so I start gnawing on the corner of my lip as I stare out at the castle.

"You don't have to be afraid-"

"I'm not afraid," I say quickly as I tug down on Draco's sweater. I pull the sleeve over my left hand and I bring it up to my face, inhaling against the fabric so I can smell Draco's cologne.

"Of course," he says with a little smile like he was humoring me. "How foolish of me to even think such a thing."

"You _are _foolish," I mutter spitefully under my breath... but he hears it.

"That was mean too," he says with a hand on his heart. "You really have no idea how terribly you treat me. I have half a mind to quit you all together…." I spare him another look and he licks his lower lip. "But of course I won't. I haven't conquered you yet."

"That's never going to happen," I tell him with an angry head shake.

"Never say never," he mutters like he didn't necessarily want me to hear.

I choose to ignore him anyways and I turn back to the castle. Zabini shouldn't be talking to me like that and he shouldn't be flirting with me. Especially not now... Not when things are so serious and real people who matter to me could be hurt. I try to find the strength to do what I have to do next, but I have no idea how to break the wards, no idea how to even start…. I lift and lower my wand a few times as I think about Draco and my brother... and Harry and Pansy. Just because they're alive, doesn't mean they're not in pain.

What if they're being tortured right now? Death Eater's are known for torturing their captives... They take pleasure in it and Draco was a traitor... Harry was the face of resistance... God, they won't survive much longer!

If I can pick out all the anger and resentment I have...If I can focus all my energy...

"Are you going to do something?" Zabini asks, checking his watch and breaking my resolve. "Or are we going to be here all night?"

I give him a dirty look and he puts a hand up in defense.

"Hey, don't look at me like that. I just don't want to stand around all night. These shoes are new and not broken in yet."

"This isn't funny," I tell him, turning back to the castle. "This isn't funny," I repeat under my breath.

"Of course it's not funny," he says, and I can feel him glaring at my back. His tone is much colder, much more hateful than before. "It isn't funny at all, babe."

I glance at him when he calls me that name, but he's not looking at me anymore. He's fiddling with his wand with his eyes narrowed like I had hurt his feelings some how, but I don't care. I don't say anything to him, I just wait until he looks at me, and then I promptly look away. He starts to unfold the map from his pocket as I pace back and forth in front of the wards, trying to remember something..._anything_...that Tom had said to me in the past that might help me now.

_...You have so much potential... and it's all wasted on you..._

"Oh, look at this," he says, but I ignore him because he's a jerk. "Yaxley is in the room with Malfoy and the others...Well, that's troubling..."

"What?"I stop pacing and look at him over my shoulder "What's troubling?"

"Your brother..." he says. "His name is gone."

"What?" I stomp towards him and snatch the map away to see for myself. "What... What does that mean?" I ask hopelessly even though I'm pretty sure I know what it means. "Does that mean he's dead?" I ask as I look at the empty space by Harry, where George's name used to be.

"Or close to it," he says lightly as he watches my profile. "That's a shame, really. I liked that brother of yours. He was one of the bearable ones..."

I clench my jaw and push the map back at his chest. That's just the spark I need and with the thought of my brother's dead body in my mind, I lift my wand and blast a curse right at the wards.

The curse is bright blue and it sores high into the air, breaking apart like a firework before hitting the wall of magic with a loud, deafening boom. Nothing happens for a few seconds and then a gust of unnaturally cold wind hits us and ruffles my hair, sending the shoulders of my cloak flowing behind me. The wind shakes me to the core and a few painfully silent moments pass before the wards start cracking...shattering like glass until it all crumbles to the ground at our feet.

There's a heavy pause before Blaise speaks and, when he does, his voice is low and unlike anything I've ever heard coming from him. "I didn't think you'd actually be able to do it," he says softly.

I glance at him to see to his reaction, but he looks... he almost looks upset.

"Isn't this why you brought me?"

He doesn't answer, but I don't wait. I start to head towards the castle, but Blaise grabs my arm before I can.

"What are you doing?" I snap as he pulls us into the forest. "We have to get in there...My brother..."

"You're not going into that castle, you silly girl," he says, pushing me against a tree and messing with an odd dial on his watch. "Just hold still."

"No, my brother..." I go to push him back but he slams my shoulder against the tree.

"I'm sorry that hurt," he says quickly. I go to move again, but he holds firm. "Your brother is fine. I lied to you," he says as he takes out the map to show me... George's name is back in the room with the others and I tilt my head in confusion when I see it. "I used a bit of kid magic to trick you. See? He's right there."

"Why would you do that?" I ask fiercely, grabbing the map and trying to figure out how he could have fooled me so easily.

_Stupid girl..._

"So you would break the wards, of course," he says simply and he snatches the map back. "If anyone had a chance of doing it, it was you. This was the only way."

I stare at him while he stuffs the map back in his pocket, but before I can call him out on his constant lies, two pops of Apparation break the silence. It makes me jump and I raise my wand to the two people in black cloaks who are barreling towards us with purposeful steps. They're on a mission, that much I can tell... but Blaise puts his hand over mine and pushes my arm down. He even tuts his tongue like I was being rash about the whole thing.

"We don't have much time," the woman on the right says as she takes off her cloak. Blaise keeps his hand over mine and squeezes gently to get me to relax, but I don't. "You're Ginny," she barks when she gets closer and I nod my head, letting her shake my free hand with callused fingers. "Name's Trisha. I'll be taking your likeness tonight.

"Wait… What?" I ask when she starts to strip out of her jeans and t-shirt.

She's older, in her mid forties, and her graying hair is cut short and spiked about her head. The man beside her is a big brick wall with a black mustache that looks like a squirrel crawled on his lip and died. He keeps pursing his lips and scanning the trees while she throws clothes on the ground. One article after another gets added to the pile until she's down to just a sports bra and grandma underwear that reaches up way past her navel. I step back and watch in confusion as she pulls out an odd looking pillow from her bag and starts strapping it around her stomach.

"Blaise?" I ask softly, unable to mask the confusion in my voice as I tilt my chin to look at him. "I don't understand…"

"They're expecting to see Ginny Weasley," Blaise says as Trisha arranges the fake stomach against her belly, punching it into place in such a way that makes me step back and touch my own belly. "And we're going to give them one. Only Trisha is a trained Auror and she's obviously not pregnant."

"I don't..."

"You don't understand," Blaise finishes for me and I blink a few times as he starts removing my cloak. "I didn't exactly fill you in," he says as he unclasps the cloak with his long fingers. "I'm good at lying, Ginny, and I had no intention of actually going into that castle just the two of us. That would be fucking stupid, no matter how strong you may be. In a few minutes the rest of the Order is going to show up, waiting for my signal to go inside. I told Yaxley that I would bring you to them if they released the others. He thinks I care about them enough to do that," he says with an eye roll. "Shows what he knows."

He starts to take off Draco's sweater, but I stop his hands.

"We were out in the open," he explains. "The Death Eaters would have been watching... They were waiting to see you break the Dark Lord's wards. They know what you were wearing."

"I..."

The woman named Trisha opens a flask and she plucks a single strand of hair from my head.

"Ow," I whisper as I rub out the pain and she gives me a crooked smile.

"Sorry," she answers before throwing the hair into the potion. It fizzles for a few moments and once it settles, she downs it all in one large gulp.

She even belches afterward and I make a face as Blaise turns to me, his broad shoulders blocking the others from view.

"Why didn't you tell me any of this?" I say to his chest because I'm so angry I feel like I might hit him. "I'm strong, Blaise. You weren't wrong about that..."

"You are sharing this body with a wizard, Ginny," he says gently. "I know you try to ignore that fact, but I will not put you in harms way... Especially when you're carrying a child."

"Blaise..."

"Listen," he says, pulling me away from Trisha and the strange man so they can't hear us. "Just listen for a moment. I am going to tell you something that is true." I swallow hard as he presses close to me with his hand running over my rounded middle. "You have a child in here that has never seen the evil we can do to one another. This pregnancy has been so stressful he's probably going to come out pulling out what little hair he has to start with."

"Don't say that."

"Are you deciding to care now?" he asks and I clench my jaw in shame because he's right.

I wasn't thinking of baby names. I wasn't really wondering what he'd look either. I'm not excited to decorate his nursery or pick out his clothes…. If I woke up tomorrow suddenly not pregnant, I don't think I would even care… I might even be _pleased_, as sad as that is….I have no drive to protect him and I have no desire to hold him… The awful truth is a dark part inside of me doesn't give a damn about him.

Blaise sees the look on my face and takes a step back, pinching the bridge of his nose before giving me a hard look.

"My mother never wanted children," he tells me, his voice low and serious. "She's a selfish bitch who never wanted me, a fact that she made very clear numerous times in my childhood."

I feel guilty, but I refuse to show it.

"She only kept me because she knew that she could use me to get the things that she wanted. Money being the driving force behind most of her decisions, she realized that I had the potential to be a big pay day for her... one she could milk until I came of age. My father..." he trails off for a second, blinking hard before continuing. "He was old. He never had any children. When he found out she was trying to do and what would become of us once she did it... he offered to marry her, give her a comfortable home life and a sizable bank account. He had always wanted a son..."

He stops talking for a second and then he looks at me.

"I wish you could have met my father. He was a good man... The world doesn't seem to have many of those."

"Your father was a death eater." I wince as soon as I say it. It might be true, but it was insensitive to bring up.

"He was a lot of things," he says, his voice a little sharper in his anger. "Beliefs don't make us dangerous; it's the actions that show the true measure of a man. Anybody can have beliefs…" he trails off and shakes his head like he was getting off track and when he looks to me again, he's serious and somber and so unlike the Zabini that I know. "My father and his sister were the only people in the whole world who ever loved me…. but my Aunt was simple. She was damaged during the war and loved like a child... My father... he died when I was young and I was left alone with my Mother who had resented me from the moment I started to grow inside of her."

"Why are you telling me this?" I ask in frustration, trying not to be moved by his little story because he's Blaise and Blaise is a liar.

"It still hurts that my birth parents never cared," he answers, running a hand over the roundness of my stomach. "It's a pain no child should ever have to know."

I turn away, the guilt starting to sink heavily on my chest because he sounds so genuine.

"Many people are going to try to use him," he says, staring at his hand on my stomach. "You know that," he adds seriously, flicking his golden eyes to mine. "And the best way to protect him from that is to love him. Not because you have to, not because you'd feel guilty otherwise... but because he'll be your son._Your _son, Ginny," he says like he was trying to make it sink in. "I know you will. You're incapable of anything less, but you have got to start acting like it. You have to start protecting him now. This baby might grow up to be a lot of things, but first and foremost, this baby is yours. How much you invest could make all the difference in the world."

"You said they wouldn't even try to hurt me...Remember, you said that..." I say pathetically because I don't want to feel bad anymore.

"I say a lot of things," he admits softly, bringing a hand up to brush his knuckles along my cheek. "They would tear that child right out of your womb if they had a chance." I swallow hard at the thought. "What kind of man would I be if I let you walk into that?" he asks seriously, sparing me a golden eyed look that makes me feel ashamed. "I am a lot of things, but I am not a monster."

"I..." I trail off for a second, not knowing what to say.

He's just staring at me, giving me this look... This look like I would be an awful person if I didn't agree with him... and maybe he's right. I look down at my stomach and sigh. Was I awful... was I selfish?

"Does that make sense to you?" he presses, tilting his head to catch my eyes. "Don't you agree? I know it's frustrating."

"Why didn't you just tell me all of this?" I ask, the anger burning my chest again. "You didn't have to trick me."

"I'm sorry," he says, looking serious again. "I thought it was the only way. Your magic plays directly off of your emotions…"

"Zabini," the woman named Trisha calls to him in a loud whisper. He looks around the trees and makes a motion with his hand.

"Just another second," he tells her before looking back to me and tilting his face down so he can see my reaction. "Ginny, please tell me that you understand. I'm not doing this to be mean or overly deceitful. I am trying to do a good thing here, to be a good guy. It's a very rare thing for me. You've already broken the wards for us and that is bounds above what anyone else will do tonight. I can't let you go in, so please say you'll stay out here."

I don't say anything for a while and Trisha whispers to us again. Zabini asks her for a few more moments and I look down at my stomach, running my hand along the baby when I feel him move. _He _moves. He's real and one day he will be born... and he will walk... and talk... and cry... and hopefully love… I look up at Zabini. He's staring at me with his dark brows furrowed and I turn away.

"Okay."

"What?" he asks gently, tilting his face to hear me better.

"I said okay. I won't go in. I'm not even good at dueling anyways," I tell him with clenched teeth. "I would probably just mess it up."

"I don't think that's true," he says, brushing his hand along my arm. "But I'm pleased anyways. Now," he exhales slowly and he's standing so close that it ruffles my hair. "We're going to need your clothes," he says, sending a look down to my dress. "Like I said, the Death Eater's were watching you at the gate."

I nod my head and I take off the cloak handing it to him and making him turn around while I take off the sweater.

"What am I supposed to wear?" I ask as I lower the straps of the orange dress. He tilts his face so I can see his profile and I bet he's peaking. "That woman was wearing jeans and a tight shirt. She's a lot smaller than me. They won't fit unless you know any sizing charms, because I sure as hell don't."

"I asked her to bring something for you," he explains. I let the dress pool at my feet as goosebumps rise on my skin. "We won't make you walk around naked."

I can hear the smirk in his voice, but I ignore it.

I bundle up the dress and hand it to him over his shoulder. I'm pleased I decided to wear shorts now. "She's not going to need my bra and underwear is she?" I ask uncomfortably as I cross my arms. "Because that's gross."

"No, just your shoes," he says and when I hesitate, he explains. "She has bigger feet than you do," he flicks me a quick glance before looking away.

"Oh," I say as I try to find a comfortable way to bend down to untie the oxfords. They come off along with my socks and I'm left barefoot and nearly naked in the forest that is far too cold for the season.

"Just give me a second," he says as he walks towards the others. I rub my skin to keep it warm and when he returns, he's holding a folded up white thing and bright red wellies.

"What?" I ask as he places the rain boots by my feet. I look at them in disgust because I know for a fact those kinds of boots aren't comfortable.

"Those are what she brought?"

"She said it was all she had that might fit you." He hands me the white bundle and I unravel it, holding it up to see a white night gown with lace trim.

"What?" I repeat because it's floor length and ridiculous. "Seriously?"

"Yeah," he says. I quickly put it on because I don't want to just be standing around in my underwear anymore. It's sleeveless and fits like a tent.

"Are you kidding me? She didn't have any sweat pants or anything?" I ask as I bundle up the fabric in my hands.

He shrugs.

"Zabini," Trisha comes towards us, only she's not Trisha anymore…. She's me. Wearing my dress and my shoes and braiding_my_ hair…. "We've lingered here too long. They're going to get suspicious."

"What shoes did you wear here?" Blaise asks. "They might be better than what you brought."

Trisha, who looks like me, glances behind her and bends down to pick up a pair of rough looking combat boots caked in mud and covered in something green and awful smelling.

"Well," Zabini looks back at me with an amused eyebrow raised. "It's the red boots or the lesbian shoes. Pick your poison."

I don't even bother to answer as I slip my feet into the rain boots, hiking up the skirt of the night gown so I don't trip all over the place.

"Ready?" Trisha asks and Blaise nods his head, reaching out to squeeze my hand. "Let me get the potion from Jaul and we'll go in." He nods again and she walks back to the brick wall with the mustache.

"Don't worry," he says giving me a little smile when I start chewing on my lip again. "I won't leave you totally out of the loop. I am not like Malfoy."

He steps back and moves his wand in the air. An odd pink spell tints the night time sky before disappearing and in its place is a mirror set into a carved silver frame.

"The surveillance is still up," he explains as he taps the mirror so a view of the front hall of Hogwarts comes into focus. "I will not let you come in with me, but I can give you the next best thing," he says as he turns the mirror with his hands, showing different sections of the castle as he pulls me to his side. "I think all the main sections are covered..."

"How do you know this magic?" I ask softly as I take a step forward to get a better look at the mirror.

"I know a lot of magic," he says with a smile as he steps behind me so his breath is warm on my neck. "Watch," he says as he reaches past me, his chest pressed into my back as he does a sequence with his hand that shrinks the mirror until it could fit in a pocket. "There." He says as he smiles against my neck. He hands it to me. "Now, to make it lager again, you just tap the corner four times in a row," he says, showing me with air movements just above the glass. "I will try to bring everything out to the halls so you can view at your leisure."

He's standing too close to me, so I move away and face him again, gripping the mirror in both hands with a worried frown on my face.

"Blaise, how did you know how to do this?" Zabini looks down at me, completely amused by my expression and he tilts his head when I furrow my brows. "The Dark Lord used this kind of mirror to show me Hogwarts once," I admit in a soft voice because I don't like talking about my time with Tom.

"And we're both wizards. Imagine that," he jokes, reaching out to put my braid over my shoulder before letting his hand travel down to my stomach where his warm hand rests just above the baby. "Remember, Ginny, if you care nothing of yourself, at least care for him," he says. "And remember what a nice guy I was tonight because I just might die."

"You're not going to die," I tell him seriously, hating the thought.

"Let's hope not. The world would be a very dull place with out me in it."

I nod because I couldn't deny that. I would be sad if he died, as awful as he is.

Trisha uses my voice to call his name again and in a moment of misplaced affection, I put my hand over his. Maybe I'm just feeling sentimental, but the move surprises him and he almost smiles as he spreads his fingers and lifts them until he threads his fingers through mine. His hand is warm and I'm cold...and maybe it's just nice to be touched because I don't pull back right away.

"Isn't it funny?" he whispers. His voice is soft and gentle as he tilts his face down to catch my eyes. "That holding hands hold more affection than a kiss?"

My stomach is starting to knot and I glance up at him, not moving because I feel like it would make him sad. He smiles for a moment before bending down like he wanted to kiss me... I turn away at the last moment... This was wrong. I shouldn't have done this.

"It depends on who you're kissing," I say as I step away quickly and start smoothing down the night gown.

"Zabini," Trisha comes to find us, looking like me and dressed like me… and even glaring like me. "Let's head in."

"Jaul is going to stay with you until the others come," Zabini says, his voice is unpleasant and cold. The man with the mustache steps forward and looks me down. I guess he's Jaul, then. "I've arranged for your father to pick you up," he adds sharply. I've upset him and a part of me feels guilty. "You shouldn't have left them with out telling," he adds. "That was actually really shitty to do to the people who love you."

I blink a few times, feeling like I had been smacked into place, but I can't respond. We share a look before he grabs the hand of the fake me and they start heading out of the forest and towards the gate. I have a silly moment where I almost follow them, but the man named Jaul grabs my arm and shakes his head.

"Blaise," I call and he stops, not looking over his shoulder, but tilting his head so he can hear me. I want to say something about Draco... about bringing him back safely, but I don't think Zabini would care too much for that right now. "Good luck," I end up saying, leaving a million things left unsaid in between.

They leave, and then Jaul hands me Trisha's cloak when he notices that I shivered. It's made of wool and it itches, but I wear it anyways. I look down at the mirror, seeing only the front hall of Hogwarts before a loud commotion starts... Pops of Apparation litter the forest and when my father, of all people, comes out of no where to pull me into a quick hug, I inhale sharply.

"Dad?" I say in a muffled voice against his chest because his grip way too tight. He pulls back and grabs my face, looking deeply into my eyes with his glasses slipping down his nose. "Dad?" I say again, confusion making my head pound.

"What is your great aunt Muriel's middle name?"

"What?" I blink a few times.

"Great aunt Muriel's middle name," he says firmly, his jaw setting into a firm line. "What is it?"

"It's..." I have to think for a moment. "Um, Lafonda...Something stupid like that..."

A grin breaks out on his face, like my answer had pleased him.

"Just had to make sure," he says, giving me a smile and pulling me into another tight hug. "Ginny," he sighs against my hair, like he was relieved to find me alive and so well. "Oh, Ginny. We thought we lost you again," he whispers, kissing the side of my head a few times before pulling back with his hands on my shoulders. "We need to get you out of here..." he says seriously, like he just realized where we were. "Here, I'll bring you home..."

He takes my hand, but I hold firm.

"I can't go home," I tell him honestly... because I just... I just can't. "Is there anything... is there anything I can do to help?"

"You try to do so much," my Dad says as Order members take positions hidden in the woods. The mirror is too cold, so I put it in a pocket in the cloak located right along the heart.

"I can do more..."

He looks around before focusing back on me like an idea had hit him. "I can't have you be anywhere near here... but I know a way you can help," he adds when he sees the look on my face. "Your mother is in Hogsmeade... helping the healers set up camp there. I can bring you there," he tells me, brushing some hair away from my face. "There you can really help."

I think for a moment, putting my hand over my belly when the baby kicks and I nod my head.

There I can help and stay out of harms way, right?

"Your mother is going to be so happy to see you," he says and I swallow hard at the thought of seeing my Mom again after leaving the way I did. I bet she's not going to be pleased.

I let myself get Apparated just outside of the Hogshead tavern that's been converted into a make shift hospital and I hesitate at the door.

"You can do a lot of good here," Dad says as he walks me in with his hands on my shoulders. "The most important job in the world…." We find my mother towards the back, fussing with Daphne as they fold bits of fabric on one of the make shift cots. "Molly," Dad coughs to get her attention and when she looks up, she puts her hand on her heart before running to me.

"Ginny!" she says as she hugs me tight, taking my breath away and squeezing painfully. "I am so pleased you're here. I wasn't sure I would ever see you again. How could you just leave with out telling us!?"

"I was with Mrs. Malfoy," I mumble, turning into a twelve year old as my mother berates me.

"You should have told us." she snaps, her eyes narrowed as she pulls back. "We thought you'd been kidnapped again... and then we just get a letter letting us know you're with that woman. A letter? The Death Eater's could have made you write something like that! I nearly had a heart attack until Narcissa Malfoy showed up in all her finery...and what are you wearing?" She pulls open my cloak and looks at the silly night gown. "What is this?""

"Molly," my father coughs, stopping my mother from delving into the rant she so sorely wanted to get out. "She wants to help," Dad says and they share a look like they didn't want to bring up how upset they were with me. Blaise was right. What I did was shitty and I would have to find the time to properly apologize, but right now wasn't that time… because right now too much was happening. "I thought this would be a good place for her."

"Right..." Mom nods, sending me another awkward smile that's tight lipped because she can't decide whether she wants to yell or hug me. "Daphne," she calls over her shoulder and Daphne, her blond hair a halo about her head, bounces towards us in a white apron that has healers supplies stuffed in the pockets. "Let's set Ginny up with a job," Mom smiles at me again with her arm around my shoulders. "Not in here though," she adds quickly before Daphne gets a chance to speak. "There are too many open potions. The fumes aren't good for the baby."

Right.

"I need to get back," Dad says as he checks his watch. "We'll be taking the castle soon. Hopefully this will be the end of it."

"Be careful," Mom says, tears threatening to fall as she lets her arm slip from my shoulders. She steps forward to hug my father and then she kisses him on the lips...The child in me wants to make a face, but I don't. "You be safe and bring our boys home."

They kiss again and just for a moment they are two human beings who love each other instead of Mom and Dad who lived only in the roles I have placed them in. It's hard to watch their intimacy, so I look away to escape it and my gaze falls on Daphne. She has her hands clasped together in front of her chest and her large eyes were brimming with tears.

"They're alive," I say to reassure her and she flicks her blue eyes towards mine. "I saw it. George is alive," I whisper because I know... I know that she loves him. "Zabini had a map. He showed me..."

She gives me a tight lipped smile that looks relieved and then she covers her mouth, turning away for a moment when a wave of emotion hits her. I barely feel anything and I glance back at my parents who finally break apart to look at me. "You be safe," Dad says with a emotion in his voice. He gives me a hug, kissing my head again before pulling back. "I love you."

"I love you too," I say and it sounds weird when I say it, like my voice is too high to be real.

He hugs Daphne too before leaving with a grave look on his old face. We watch in silence as he leaves... not saying a word before the door shuts. My heart falls to see him gone…. Like it used to drop when he would leave for work in the morning when I was little… but this was much more serious…. This was life and death and he might never come back….

"You know," Mom says. Her voice is light and cracking with sadness. "I have done this so many times, one would think I would be used to it by now... but I never am." She appears to be talking to the air in front of her and Daphne steps forward to take her arm. "It always hurts."

"They will all be alright, Mrs. Weasley," Daphne says, playing the good comforting daughter as I stand awkwardly by a cot. "The Weasley men are a resilient bunch."

They share a smile and then turn to me as I play with the ring on my finger, never feeling more left out of my own family.

Mom shakes off her sadness and a sharpness comes back into her eyes. "Now, Ginny," she smiles as she wipes away her tears. "I think we should put you upstairs. Things will be getting bloody down here and it won't be good for you to be around it." She walks towards a basket that's full of white towels. "We can set you up in a room where you can sterilize these for us. You know how to do that, right? It's a very simple spell..."

"I know it," I admit and she smiles that weird smile again.

"Good. Good..." she nods her head and then makes a motion with her hand. "Come with me, then. I'll show you the way."

When she starts walking, I follow, but before we reach the stairs, a girl in healers robes rushes towards my Mom and demands an audience. The basket gets handed off to Daphne and my Mom waves us on, telling Daphne where she wants me stationed and what orders I have to follow.

I look towards Daphne and she gives me a sweet smile that makes me look away.

"Follow me, Gin," she says as I feel an itching in my chest.

We walk up the rickety staircase before reaching an empty room to the right of the hall that has one grime covered window. The room is humid and I take off the cloak, folding it over my arm and looking around with a brow raised.

"I can grab you a chair," she says as she sets the basket down. The room is bare, but there is one dresser against the far wall that's warped from water damage and missing a few handles. Daphne puts her hands on her hips and looks around with a sigh. "Maybe two, that way you won't have to bend down so much."

I bring a hand up to my head and rub my temple…. I feel an ache now… just starting in my mind.

"Are you alright?" she asks and I blink hard a few times before nodding my head.

"Sorry," I whisper. "I think I'm getting a headache."

"Oh, well… I mean…. We might have something for that if you want."

"No, I'm fine," I say. I dig inside of the cloak to take out the mirror. For a moment, I forgot I even had it.

I exhale slowly before walking towards the center of the room and tapping the corner four times like Blaise had shown me. The mirror makes a cracking sound before enlarging and floating in front of me like it was hanging on an imaginary wall. Daphne gasps behind me, but I ignore her as I run my finger along the glass, turning the images of the castle until I find Blaise and the imposter Ginny in the back hallway on the second floor, talking to Yaxley and a whole group of Death Eater's robed in black.

"My God," Daphne says, walking up behind me as I try to fiddle with the mirror to see if I can hear anything. "Where did you get this?"

"Blaise gave it to me," I say as run my fingers along the sides, looking for some sort of volume control. I could hear things with the Dark Lord's looking glass, it only makes sense that it would work with this as well.

"He was the one who brought you here?" she asks and I nod my head, narrowing my eyes as I watch them speak... trying to read their lips.

"Yes," I say as that ache in my brain starts to get a little more pronounced. A witch with purple hair falls in front of the imposter and reaches out to put her hands on the fake stomach, but Blaise kicks her back with a sneer.

Something pulses between my legs and I look away from Zabini to focus on something else.

"Why?"

"Why did he bring me?" I ask impatiently as I look over my shoulder. Daphne, her blonde hair a mess, looks incredibly timid as she wrings the end of the apron out with her hands. "Because," I say as I look back at the mirror. "I had to break the wards."

"You broke the wards?" she repeats, like she just couldn't grasp the idea and I nod my head sharply. "Ginny... That's... That's quite a feet."

"Is it?" I ask snidely, wanting her to stop talking.

"I should get your mother... She should see this."

"Don't you dare," I say hatefully, giving her an awful glare over my shoulder that makes her wince. "She'll just take it away. I need to see what's going on," I tell her, my voice is starting to sound crazed and I'm sweating. "Don't you tell her, Daphne."

"Alright," she puts her petite hands up and nods her head. "I won't but... But Ginny, you are looking awfully pale... You look... Oh, my God!"

"What?" I snap, turning back to the mirror when her eyes grow as wide as saucers. "What did I-" I was going to ask what I missed, but I stop short because I can see it.

The purple haired witch had gotten to the imposter and discovered the fake stomach. The scene was frenzied... Death Eaters were arguing and one of them had locked Trisha into a hold with their wand pointed at her neck.

"Poly juice potion would only replicate you," Daphne says behind me, her voice sounding worried. "Not the baby."

Something happened.

Yaxley did a spell that made his wand glow yellow and then the witch who was holding onto Tricia used a curse to... a curse to kill her. It's a bloody death that tears open her insides. I cover my mouth and Daphne squeaks behind me as they let her fall to the floor. Her own likeness came back as her life, and most of her insides slip from her body.

"That can't be good," Daphne says and I agree with her, nodding as my head starts pounding something terrible.

Blaise jumps out of harms way and slides down the banister as Death Eater's start to chase after him. Tricia's trampled under heavy boots and discarded quickly like she never mattered at all and I have a moment of sadness for her loss because she probably had family… she might have even had kids… and she died for taking my place. I shake out of it and I turn the mirror to find Blaise again. He's being pursued through a corridor and I tilt the mirror so I can follow. A curse gets his arm and blasts a cut right through it, but he keeps going even when the blood starts flowing.

Blaise is a quick sprinter and he makes it to the Great Hall, hiding in an alcove and speaking frenzied words that I can't hear into his watch. Death Eater's follow shortly afterward and find Zabini in his hiding spot, but Order members start to show up just in time. They fight against the wall of Death Eater's and Zabini takes the distraction to slink away again, hiding by the stairs where he heals his arm with a quickly done spell before looking up…. Right where I'm looking down…. He stares for a few moments with his jaw tight before running into the battle and fighting like hell.

"Can you see the others with that thing?" Daphne is standing right beside me now. "Can you see George or Draco?"

I shake my head as I turn the mirror a million different ways. "They're in a room that's not covered," I tell her as I turn the mirror back to the battle. "They're in the Potions lab. Blaise knows that," I add as I start chewing on my nails.

Daphne starts to say something else, but pops of Apparation can be heard from outside and she runs towards the window.

"It's started," she says with a head shake, blonde curls bouncing around her face. "I have to get down stairs. There are ten people bloodied up already."

She runs towards the door, purpose making her steps sharp... and she glances at me before taking off into the hall. That look in her eyes was so heavy and so serious... I realize now that this war had changed us all... Even silly Daphne...She wasn't half as silly anymore.

When she's gone, I look back at the mirror. At the raging battle... but I notice something through the all the craziness... Yaxley, and that awful pig nose of his, is starting to creep away from the battle. He keeps looking over his shoulder, like he was waiting for someone to follow him, and then he starts sprinting away once he's in the clear. He goes back upstairs... to the third floor... and into the girl's lavatory.

Where the entrance to the Chamber of Secrets is.

Why is hey going in there?

"In here!" someone yells and I snap my neck to the doorway.

Three healers come stomping into my room and the mirror falls to the ground. It shatters at my feet and I bend down to salvage it... but it starts sizzling against floor before disappearing all together. I clench my fist in anger to lose that window to the castle and I nearly stomp my foot but I stop myself. The healers are speaking frantically to one another it takes my attention away when I realize they're carrying in two people completely covered in blood.

"I'm sorry." The taller healer notices me first. He's older, with a balding head of white hair. "We need the room. These two will need extensive attention."

I get out of the way when one of the healers produces two sterile cots with his wand and I back up against the wall when the bloodied people are laid down on top of them. One is screaming bloody murder and the other is gurgling…. I can see that one is a man is one is a woman now...Two of the healers start to work on the man, hovering over him and using their wands as he screams in pain. That leaves the older healer to work by himself woman, who is bleeding from so many open wounds on her body that I can hardly see how she could survive.

"You, girl," the tall healer snaps at me as I try to slink out of the room and when we make eye contact, he nods to the basket of towels. "Grab a few of those for me, will you?"

"They haven't been sterilized," I admit, feeling stupid saying it and stupid for not doing the one job I had.

"I don't care," he snaps as the woman groans underneath his wand and makes that odd gurgling sound like there was water in her throat. "Just grab some and come over here. I need all the hands I can get."

I grab a few towels and scurry towards him, hesitating a second when I see all the blood and carnage.

"Put one of those against this wound," he says, nodding to the gaping gash in the woman's stomach. "Just put pressure on it and hold it there while I heal this," he says, moving back to the awful looking mark on her neck….that must be the cause for that awful gurgling noise. "I assume you know nothing of medicine?"

"No," I admit and he nods.

"Not surprised. You look like you're twelve."

I would be offended, but I can't find the energy to be... too much is happening and I'm literally pushing a woman's insides back into her body.

"I hate the Death Eater's," he sneers as he works, getting blood all up and down his arm. "They're cruel fighters...Beasts are what they truly are. They pick targets and surround them... ganging up on their opponents with no sense of dignity or honor. The curses they use are foul," he says, sparing me a little glance before going back to healing the poor woman below. "They're not fighting a war... They're not fighting for something great. They're mutilating bodies. Look at this poor child," he says and I flick a glance down. I can barely make out her face... it's so disfigured. "She can't be a day over fifteen."

I look down at her as the healer starts to mend bone and cartilage... Weaving together open sores and bloodied cuts... When I see a tuft of dirty blonde hair that's unstained from all the bloodshed, realization washes over me like an ice cold shower.

I _know_ who this is.

How could I not know?

I quickly look down her body again… of course… the tall lankiness of her form is still there and when she opens the one eye that actually _can_ open…. I see the light blue misty iris that I had once looked into when she was considered my best friend. My hands start shaking. My heart starts pounding… and my head starts screaming.

"She's seventeen," I say, glancing at the healer again as the bile rises in my throat. "Her name is Luna Lovegood."

"You know her?" The healer asks.

"You have to save her. You have to make her better…." I keep rambling variations of that and my eyes become blurred from crying. "You have to fix this."

"What's her name again?" he asks, using a soothing voice as he heals all the life threatening curses on her body.

"Luna," I say quickly, breathlessly, as I keep my hands pressed against her middle.

"She's your friend?" he asks as snot starts to drip from my nose.

"She was," I admit because it was true.

I had lost her during the war. Her father died sometime in the beginning and I thought she went into hiding with a family friend in the north, but here she is…. Here she is and I had no idea she had joined the army. Here she is where I have failed to be a good friend to her once again. Our friendship seems like something that happened a millennium ago but the good memories are still fresh in my mind… They still make my heart clench.

"You have to save her!"

"I need you to calm down," I healer says, speaking to me in a straight monotone voice as every fiber in my being shakes. "I need your help, but I need you to calm down and stop getting so emotional. I know it's very hard, but I need a steady hand. Just breathe," he says and I inhale slowly. "And keep your hands still."

I nod, trying to do as he says…moving this way and that way and grabbing more towels when more blood comes pooling out. His voice is tense and taunt, but the movements of his wand are fluid like a well learned dance.

"What house was she in?" he asks, as he tries to heal that gash on her throat again because the other thing he tried didn't hold.

"Ravenclaw," I say, my voice sounding odd and frightened. "We've been friends since I was twelve," I admit softly, closing my eyes when the wounds…. The wounds start to fester and smell.

"Does she have any family?" He asks and I shake my head.

She had no one left... and I was miserable even though I had a majority of my family intact.

He doesn't say anything after that and sweat starts to form on his brow when he opens a breathing passage in her throat, inserting some kind of tube that he pulls from his pocket to help her breathe. I feel like I'm going to throw up, but I keep swallowing it.

When he moves to the wound on the stomach, I cringe away and have to cover my mouth.

"You look ill," he says as he starts mending the wound with his wand. Luna makes an odd rattling noise with her throat. "If you need to throw up, you can leave. I can take it from here."

"I'm fine," I tell him, using more towels to help... but she starts screaming and it frightens me so my hands falter for a moment. The scream is a desperate scream, one I've never heard before but it haunts me so I look away from it... towards the second bed where the two healers are amputating the legs on the man...

I'm not fine anymore. I grab the now empty basket of towels and drag it to the hallway where I empty my stomach until I feel like my whole body is turning inside out. I break out in a cold sweat and I throw up one last time before standing straight and pushing hair out of my face. My nightgown is all bloodied now and I close my eyes for moment, catching my breath before finding the courage to go back into that room.

I've seen awful things... I've been through awful things...I can be there for an old friend.

When I get back into the room, the old healer is wiping sweat from his brow and he's sitting back on his haunches. I walk towards him, sending another look towards the man who's legs are gone before kneeling down. She's not screaming anymore but she's breathing slowly... her wounds still looking awful.

"Matthew," a woman in healer robes comes running into the room and the old man looks up. "There's a boy downstairs. His sternum is cracked and the Stacklized Curse has reached his heart. Seth is busy..."

"I can be down there in a second."

"What?" I ask as he stands up, grabbing a clean part of the towel to clean his hands.

"There's really not much I can do right now," he tells me. "You can stay here with her, but I have to go back downstairs. I've done all that I can."

He leaves after that and the other two healers keep working on the man in the next bed. I go back to Luna and use my wand to clean bits of blood and dirt that I find as her chest rises and falls. She can't speak, her jaw is too messed up, but she keeps looking at me with that one good eye, so I take her hand.

She squeezes my fingers.

The man in the second passes out and one of the healers leaves while the other bandages what's left of his legs. I inhale sharply and look back down at my friend. The world is an awful and unfair place. Just over a year ago Luna and I were still friends, still working and laughing together... until I dragged her to Pansy Parkinson's house and the whole thing went to hell.

"I didn't know you joined the army," I say as I look at her uniform. It's torn and blood stained, but I can see the Order's logo stitched on her sleeve. "I'm so sorry this happened." She makes a noise in her throat, that odd gargling noise again. I ball my right hand up in a fist and bring it up to my forehead. It feels like there's a hammer pounding away right behind my eyes. "We've all been drowning, you know, since last summer," I whisper as I think of Theo and Draco. How light it all seemed and how quickly it turned dark. "It all went to hell so fast...and I have no idea what to do."

She left hand is clenched into a fist and she starts to move her arm, her muscles straining and shaking the whole way.

"Luna, don't move," I tell her, putting my hand on her arm and resting it against the cot again. "Try to relax. It might help with the healing."

Her face screws up in a weird expression and she shakes her head.

"No, don't do that," I panic as I hover over her. "He put some tube thing in your throat to help you breathe. Don't move your head."

She exhales slowly and closes her eye for a moment.

I can practically feel her frustration.

"This is it," I tell her. "After this fight there will be no more. The Death Eaters will truly be done and what's left of them will be tried for their crimes. Maybe things will get back to normal then... and you could come and stay with us, you know," I tell her gently, grabbing her hand again. "We could be friends again."

She tries to say something and it comes out like a strangled whisper.

"Just rest," I tell her, putting my hand on her shoulder.

She doesn't rest. She starts moving her lips... attempting to speak, so I lean in closer to hear.

I make out nothing at first... just jumbled words through muffled breaths... then I make out my name and I lean in closer.

"What?" I ask softly, my stomach pressing into the cot

She says something else I can't make out and then the next word out of her mouth make me pause.

"Second..."

"What?"

"Second house."

"I don't understand," I tell her, pulling back to look into her eye.

"The second house," she says, opening her clenched fist, revealing a silver pendent that has a two swans entangled around a shield. I take it from her and wipe off some of the blood with my thumb. I've seen this coat of arms before in random places around her house. It's not so strange to see such things in mostly pureblooded house holds... I just don't understand why she's holding it now. "The second house is falling."

"Falling?" I whisper, but my neck snaps up when lightening strikes outside and thunder claps soon after. The bang rattles the winders and shakes the walls... wind whistles and rain beats against the roof... and then another loud clap of thunder rumbles the building... and Luna starts shaking uncontrollably.

"Oh, my God," I try to hold her arms from flying about as her whole body moves and jerks... A foam starts to comes out of her mouth and I panic. "Luna."

The healer next to us rushes over and tries to do a few things with his wand. "She's in shock," he explains, sparing me a little look when his spells don't do anything. He's middle eastern and he looks exhausted. "Um... let me think..." he says to himself as he helps hold her down. "Let me think..."

He starts saying something else, but Luna's skin starts cracking...I fall back and the healer does as well because she's cracking like an egg shell, showing black charred skin underneath. The noise it makes is awful and I cover my mouth because I've never seen anything like it before. It's like a scene out of a demented nightmare I have no business witnessing and I scramble back until I hit the wall as fear grips my heart. She breaks all over, like her skin was just a covering and not attacked to her body at all...and the smell... the smell is horrific.

"What is this?" I ask, but the healer doesn't get a chance to answer because Luna suddenly bursts into flames.

She starts screaming... a loud and soul piercing scream... as her entire body goes up in flames...

It's unlike anything I've ever seen before and the healer tries to put out the fire with his wand. When that fails, he grabs a nearby towel and attempts to put it out the old fashioned way, but that's not working either and her screams shake my entire body with a feeling I've never felt before. I suddenly become numb to my feelings and I just stare... eyes wide open and hardly seeing a thing as the flames eat her entire body... The noises she's making... I feel like I might faint but I can't move. My muscles are made out of stone and I feel like there's an anchor on my leg... keeping me in place. The fire is an odd purple color with green at it's core when it normally would be blue, and watching it so closely is almost hypnotic..._ Cursed fire..._.. I shake out of my daze and pull myself up to try help the healer, but as suddenly as it started... the fire extinguishes before I even take my first step.

A moment of tense silence follows before the healer uses his wand to run over Luna's charred chest.

"She's dead," he declares softly..._.Pointing out the obvious.._. "I've never seen anything like that before," he admits, sending me a worried look. He's just a young guy... maybe twenty six... and he looks completely in over his head. "Are you alright?" he asks, coming towards me as I stare wide eyed at the corpse of my friend. "Jesus, I didn't realize you were with child," he says, looking down at my stomach with troubled eyes. "What are you even doing in a place like this?"

"What kind of curse would do such a thing?" I ask, my throat tight as I look at Luna's charred body. There's a sadness inside me... something buried deep in my chest that's screaming and crying right now... but the shock is too much and nothing is coming to the surface just yet.

"I'm not sure," he says with a head shake. "Something evil."

He leans forward and takes a few blood stained towels to cover what's left of her body. "Wait," I say, going towards the cot and looking down at what used to be my friend.

I feel something brewing deep in my chest... Something awful that has morphed from months of sadness and abuse... Something catches the light and I reach out to grab the silver pendent from Luna's tightly clenched fingers. I look at the two swans through blurred eyes and then I clutch it so tightly that it breaks through the skin of my palm and starts bleeding something terrible. The healer says something, but I ignore him as I take the towels and cover Luna's body myself.

_The second house..._

I look at the window, through the rain and through the trees where the castle is in the distance. Resting on a cliff like a demon from a nightmare.

_Something evil..._.

I send the healer a look before leaving the room. I jog walk down the rickety stair with the nightgown bunched around my thighs and when I get to the ground floor, I stop short when two healers run in front of me, blocking my path as they hustle to help more fallen Order members.

_The second house is falling..._I shake my head to get Luna's voice out of my head.

People are all over the place. Running, healing, yelling... and blood... so much blood.

_Blood is the most important thing..._

I shake my head again and watching the madness like it was moving around me in slow motion. The old healer upstairs was right, the Death Eater's are cruel with their curses... they weren't seeking just to kill or injure... they were seeking to torture and ruin...My mother is working hard, running around the healers to assist them. Daphne is close by, her white apron soaked in blood. She looks completely frazzled as she hands off potions and supplies to impatient healers who are barking demands as they try to salvage the lives of the Order members brought in from the battle.

I don't know which is worse, being in the heart of the battle, or being around for the aftermath.

_I've always liked you in red..._

It makes me think of Tom and all the times he said I could be so much more than I am. How powerful I could be and how wasteful I was... I know my talk with Blaise had made me feel guilty, but I know deep down that I could honestly help. For Luna and the countless others who've lost their lives... I look down at my wand, turning it in my hand for a few moments before making the decision and walking towards the front door. No one notices me leave during the commotion and when I get outside, I look towards the castle far in the distance as rain drenches my clothes before lifting my wand and Apparating.

I land on the third floor. With the wards broken, Apparation to and from the castle is possible and I look around to make sure no one is going to attack me before exhaling slowly. Appparting makes my bones ache and I pause a moment with my hand on my back before looking down at the wet bloodied nightgown. It's too long. I can't move easily with it, so I slash it with my wand so it rests at my knees.

The fight is still in the main hall and it's making the whole castle shake. I grip my wand before I start heading towards the stair case to join, but someone starts yelling my name. I turn around quickly, only find Moaning Myrtle at the end of the hall, hopping up and down and waving at me.

"Ginny! Oh, I knew you would come!"

"Myrtle?" I whisper in confusion as I approach. She's standing in a circle of black salt... ghost salt..._.confinement salt of for the dead..._

"I told them... I told them Ginny Weasley was my very best friend and she would never stand for this!"

"What's happened?" I ask softly, looking at the circle with a furrowed brow.

"Those awful Death Eater's grounded us!" she snaps as she motions to the circle. "All because The Bloody Baron and Nearly Headless Nick wouldn't leave well enough alone. They tried to have a mutiny against them! Can you believe that? Ghosts against living people! It was just silly. I told them so... I told them it was silly but no one listens to sad old Myrtle. I've been stuck in this stupid circle for months. Months, I tell you! It's been just so completely awful. I can't move!" She _moans _as she paces back and forth inside the circle. "It's the worst thing that's ever happened to me... other than dying, of course, that was pretty awful... but this... this is torture! I can't fly, I can't walk through walls... I can't even spy on people! And you know how much I love spying on people!"

"I..."

"Oh, and you know what," she says, totally ignoring me as she stops pacing to stare me down. "That pig faced Death Eater is the worst of them all! He is so terrible to everyone and he's not even good looking! At least Tom Riddle is good looking! Anyways, if you could just put a dash in this pesky circle and set me free, that would just be great."

I bring my foot out and make a swipe in the circle. She laughs loudly and floats towards the ceilings doing a few back flips and spinning like a ballerina.

I head towards the stairs.

"Where are you going?"

Myrtle plops herself in front of me and it makes me stumble back.

"I'm going to end this," I tell her, walking around her with my thoughts of Luna and her burning body.

"All by your lonesome?" she asks as she floats beside me with her hands resting behind her back.

I flick her an irritated look and decide to ignore her.

"You're going the wrong way, you know."

"What are you talking about?" I ask when she jumps in front of me again.

"Aren't you going to save your boyfriend? Isn't that why you're here?"

"Draco..." I trail off for a moment, blinking hard when my head pulses. I could do that... I could free them before joining the battle. Saving lives would be a whole lot better than taking them, anyways. I pass her again to get to the stairs so I can go down to the dungeons, but she blocks me. "What are you doing?" I snap and she tilts her head.

"Where are you going?" she asks, turning so she's hanging upside down right in front of me.

"The potions lab."

"Why would you ever do that?" she asks when I start going down the stairs.

"That's where they are."

"Oh yes," she nods her head as she starts tiptoeing down the bannister. "But they were moved when the battle started up..." she says as she smiles at me. "All four of them, including Draco Malfoy."

I stop.

"Seriously?"

She nods and smiles. "I saw it myself... and they were in a bad way." She shakes her head like she was remembering something unpleasant... and in turn I think of Luna. A bad way, indeed. "Not sure if they'll survive the night down there."

I did see Yaxley disappear into chamber... that would make sense, I guess. I hesitate a second before nodding my head and turning.

"The best place to put things you want to keep hidden is the Chamber," she says as she follows me up the stairs and down the hall. "But of course, you would know all about that."

"Who's been opening the door?" I ask, the question stopping me short when I realize the only way to get into the chamber would be with someone who can speak to snakes.

"Hmm?" she asks, blinking at me behind black rimmed glasses.

"Who's been letting them into the chamber? Harry wouldn't. He's the only parslemouth I know and I'm not sure he can even do that anymore..." I trail off when she shrugs. Myrtle knew how to open the door, perhaps another Death Eater knew the right amount of hisses to get inside as well.

That could make sense too.. .

"I might need your help getting into the chamber," I tell her honestly, because I had needed her when I was using the space for practice... I might need her again.

"Why?" she giggles as she spins in midair. "Why need my help when you have a snake in your belly?"

"I do not," I nearly yell and she looks amused by my reaction.

"That's what everyone here is saying anyways," she says with a shrug.

"Well, everyone is wrong," I say harshly and she just smiles as she floats above me with a little grin on her face.

I shake her off and go to the bathroom. The sink is already parted, revealing the darkness that leads into the depths of the castle. I tap my wand against my thigh for a few moments... hesitating before taking the first step. Myrtle follows me, singing songs and doing flips in the air as we make out descent. It's a long way down and it feels like years of my life were being sucked out of me with each step. When we finally reach the chamber door, I start to feel something troubling settle on my chest... a feeling close to dread with a dash of hysteria.

"Open it for me," I say to the ghost who's sitting cross legged on a nearby beam.

"Are you sure you want to go in there?" she asks, tilting her head to the side and letting her glasses slide down her nose. "I mean, it is ghastly, isn't it?"

"You said they were in there, right?" She nods and I grip my wand. "Then I need to get in there. Just do it for me. Please?" I ask through clenched teeth.

She raises a brow before hissing the practiced words. The door starts to creek open and I pause for a second, waiting for an attack, but when none comes, I take a tentative step forward...then another... and another... until I'm completely inside of the damp chamber. I trigger immediately, but I close my eyes and try to breathe slowly... I will not have a panic attack. Not now.

_Enemies of the heir beware..._

Not now! I clench my fist and try to find it in me to be brave... Shaking off all thoughts of my childhood...or lack thereof... I let my eyes open after getting my emotions under control and I look behind me when I realize Myrtle didn't follow. She's hovering in the doorway, blinking at me behind those silly glasses.

"Are you coming?" I ask softly, trying not to sound frightened.

"I can't..." she motions down to the floor. A solid line of black salt is blocking her path. "Break the line and I can help you find the others."

I nod, guessing that the death eaters wouldn't want ghosts to interfere with their demented word down here. I walk to her and swipe a line in the salt. She claps her hands before floating past me with a squeal of delight and she disappears into the darkness before I can call her back to me.

The chamber always smells like an unpleasant basement and I make a face when the scent brings up awful memories. Ginny from a year ago probably would have had a panic attack by such a smell, but I'm not that girl anymore. I do my best to shake it off and I lift my wand, igniting the torches that line the walls. They bathe the never ending room in an unhealthy green light that makes the Chamber feel like the first circle of hell. If there was such a place as the Underworld... it probably would like this... with it's never ending darkness and the soul consuming feeling of hopelessness...

My rain boots squeak against the stone floor as I walk towards the statue of Salazar Slytherin... He was not an attractive man and I have to wonder what he would think of the world now... What would he think of the school he help to build... and the beliefs that helped destroy it? I hear a rustling, so I stop and look around for Myrtle, but she's no where to be found.

Suddenly, a spell shoots out from around the statue and grazes my neck.

I screech in pain before shooting a frenzied curse in the direction of the caster. The curse, a blind curse unknown to me, makes the statue blow up with a bang, sending the pieces flying all over the chamber floor. I hide in an alcove to escape the wreckage with heart pounding.

"Oh, I think you got him," Myrtle yells once the blast settles and the dust clears. I peak my head out as she floats towards the shattered statue. "You got him good!" she starts doing a little dance. "Killed that pig nose dead!"

"Yaxkley is dead?" I squeak.

"Indeed. This block fell right on his chest," she says as I cautiously step out of my hiding spot. "Hopefully he doesn't come back as a ghost. Could you imagine how terrible that would be for me?"

"Where are the others?" I ask as I scan the room, walking around the shattered statue and glancing down at Yaxley.

He _is _dead... .His glassed over eyes are staring straight ahead and there's a large stone on his chest that flattened his ribcage. Still clutched in his left hand is a velvet bag of ghost salt that's spilled around him from the impact of my curse. It's disturbing to see and I feel the bile rise in my throat before I push it back down.

"They have to be around here somewhere," she calls from the ceiling with a fake thinking voice. I cover my mouth and look away from Yaxley. "Oh, where, oh, where could they be?"

"You said you knew they were in here for sure."

"Oh, I did know..." she nods her head, pigtails tickling her cheeks. "But they might have moved them again."

"Might?" I hiss angrily as I bring my hand up to the wound on my neck. It's bleeding something awful and the pain's finally hit me. It's white hot and it makes my eyes tear up, but I will _not _cry.

"Yes, might..." she looks around with her hands on her hips.

"If they aren't here?" I ask as I use my wand to move the rubble of the statue, becoming frantic in my search. "Then why did Yaxley come down here..." I trail off because I can see Myrtle heading towards the door. "Where are you going?"

"I'm going to check upstairs. Make sure no one's coming," she says as she peaks her head out of the doorway. "This is a one way exit, Ginny Bean," I make a face at the nickname, but I don't mention it. " Trust me, you do not want to get stuck down here," she says and I nod my head in understanding before turning back to find the others.

"Thanks..." I start to say, but when the door slams, I jump and run towards it, tripping over my feet and the stone body of Salazar Slytherin.

I pound my fists against the door and feel around for something to hold onto...but there are no handles... no door knobs to open it back up. I press my shoulder against it, refusing to be stuck down here in this hell hole with a dead body... a dead body of a person I just killed.

Myrtle always had to open the door with the same hiss when it would close before...

"She'll come back," I whisper hopefully to myself as I press the door again. I even try to use a bit of magic, but it just ricochets off the door and hits the wall behind me. "She'll come back..." I say again, nodding my head and then pressing my forehead to the cold metal with my eyes clenched shut. "She'll come back..."

"No, she won't."

I snap my eyes open when I hear _that _voice and a cold chill crawls up my spine.

"Betrayal hurts, doesn't it?"

I turn around quickly with my wand up, but I nearly drop it when _he _appears among the rubble.

"You can't trust anyone," he says with a smile and I shake my head because he can't possibly be here. "They're all liars and crooks."

I inhale quickly, my breath catching and nearly choking on the suddenly cold air. There...standing right in front of me in his old Hogwarts uniform looking just like he stepped out of a diary is Tom Riddle. It's bringing back too many memories... too many nightmares... and I start breathing heavily as I flatten myself against the wall.

"At least I'm honest about who and what I am. It's completely despicable to go against someone so completely. Even I know that."

"How are you-"

"Nothing truly dies," he replies as he leans against the wall with his hands in his pockets. He's a ghost- as white and translucent as Myrtle and as beautiful as Tom Riddle in his prime ever was. "Not if they don't want to anyways," he adds with a smile. "You have nothing to say to me? After all we've been through?"

I swallow the lump in my throat, but I can't look away.

"Don't you miss me?"

"How..." I trail off, not sure of what to ask and he gives me another patient smile. "I saw your dead body," I tell him, my right hand is shaking uncontrollably and Tom sees it, smiling at the twitch like it was something adorable. "It was burned..."

"You can kill the body," he says. "But it's a lot harder to kill the soul. A simple knife will not do that." He smiles at the look on my face. "Come on now. You knew it was too easy. I would never go out that quickly"

"No..." I shake my head. "This is not even happening. This is a dream." I close my eyes shut, willing it to be so. "This is just a nightmare."

"You dream of me often?"

"Shut up," I hiss, turning around and pressing my forehead against the door and bringing hands up to cover my eyes. "This isn't real."

"Oh, but it is real," he says. "Look at me and you will see how real it is."

I tilt my head and look over my shoulder. He's still there, still staring at me with black coal eyes.. still smiling. This has to be a dream and soon Draco will wake me up and these past few days will be like they never happened..._Never happened. Never happened. Never happened... _

"You're dead."

"That's true," he says, nodding his head. "In one sense of the word, I suppose."

"It's not possible. I must be going mad."

"You're not mad," he says. "You have never been mad. A little confused... a little naive... a little whiny... a little silly... but never mad."

I don't say anything to that, I just turn back to the door and press my forehead against it again. I toy with the idea of slamming my head against the wall until my brains come out.

"Weren't you wondering how I died after our little meeting in the forest was going so well?"

I don't say anything.

"After all, that is the last time we saw one another... No?" he asks when I refuse to answer and he comes closer, his ghostly shoes tapping against the hard stone floor. "I could show you, if you'd like..." he says as I shake my head. "Powerful wizards make powerful ghosts. I bet you don't remember, do you? You rarely remember anything of interest."

"Leave me alone."

He stops walking for a moment and I look behind me to make sure he's not going to do anything terrible. "You and I are alike," he says, removing his hands from his pockets to touch his chest like he was giving a heart felt statement. "Do you still not see that? We are cut from the same cloth and nothing will ever change that."

I shake my head again, some hair coming loose and falling in my eyes. "You're evil."

"There is no such thing," he counters firmly curling his hand into a fist. "People like you and I are above good and evil...We're above all of that..." he trails off for a moment and then looks over my face with a sigh. "You look frightened."

"I'm not," I tell him, my teeth clenched and betraying my emotions as I turn to face him full on.

"Of course," he says, giving me a smile and looking so much like Blaise."Let me give you a little lesson in trust, Ginny. I'll show you a great betrayal," he says, walking my way until he's standing toe to toe with me. "Let me show you why I am this way and why you are the way you are."

"No."

He smiles again. Handsome teenage Tom Riddle in his Slytherin robes, smiles at me. "You keep saying that word. I think you know by now that it doesn't matter a thing to me."

"You're dead," I tell him, blinking at him through my lashes. "You can't do magic."

"But the dead carry memories," he says as he gets so close to me... so close I can see that one freckle he has on the side of his face. "And I've got a whole bag full for you."

Before I can run, he takes a step forward until his body is right inside of mine. I freeze. I can't move... I can't breathe... I can feel him inside of me, going through my thoughts and feelings and turning my blood into ice. After a few torturous moments, the chamber falls away and I find myself in a buried memory outside of Shell cottage.

I see it all going on around me like I was watching a muggle television show. Outside but inside and all around the forest... The battle is raging wild around me, curses are lighting up the sky and people are dying...I walk through the memory, the edges clouded and fuzzy and beyond my reach. I can see myself among the trees. I was laying on the ground with Tom, a man built by magic and blood, hovering over me with his wand pressed against my exposed belly.

I was knocked out during this. I remember him throwing a curse at me... I remember the darkness that followed but the rest of the night was gone to me...but here I can watch, here I can see Tom, his dark hair falling across his brows as he starts to cut my stomach open with his wand. I can feel it... It hurt something terrible and inside I was screaming, but I just couldn't move... until my hand started to reach up to stop him. I grabbed his wrist and dug my nails into his skin until he finally looked at me.

What he saw made him smile.

I didn't try to curse him, I didn't try to run or scream... and he didn't try to put me under again. I move closer to see as I sat up and touched the small cut Tom had left on my stomach. The blood was bright red and I held it up to the light before licking my finger.

I cringe in disgust... Memory me smiles... and then I see my eyes... they're as red as Tom's have ever been.

"There you are," The monster named Tom whispered as I looked over his face, red eyes dancing along his features before something odd happened... something in the way I was looking at him changed. I tilted my chin down and smiled... a very weird and seductive looking smile.. before bringing my hand out to his neck and pulling his face towards mine.

I kissed him. I kissed him long and hard and passionately and I just couldn't believe what I was doing. Tom Riddle was my tormenter, my nightmare, my rapist... and there I was... kissing him like I loved him. I laid back against the forest floor while curses split the trees around us and I pulled him close, tilting my face and deepening the kiss.

What in the hell was I doing?

I'm completely horrified as I watch my hand dance down his chest until I reach his belt buckle, but he stopped me before I could do anything awful.

"Now is not the time for that," he said, clicking his tongue as he put my hand on his shoulder. "There is a war going on," he smiled as I watched him, red eyes against red eyes. "Besides," he added, pulling back to run his hand along my stomach again. "I wouldn't be able to do anything in that respect." His red eyes flicked to mine again. "You broke me and there is only one way to fix it."

He started to bunch up my dress again, but I grabbed his wrist in a firm grip. "No."

He clenched his teeth. "You know how much I don't like that word."

"I'll die," I said, my voice sounding strong and confident... more like his.

"That's hardly true," he replied, and his voice sounded softer, sweeter, more like mine.

I looked around with my new red eyes before looking back at Tom and reaching out to touch his arm. "No," I said, my voice still as solid as ever.

"This is all your fault," he replied, smiling at my hand as I danced my fingers down his arm... where I took the wand from his fingers without any resistance. "You've been a very naughty girl."

Why was he talking so casually with me? Why was he letting me take his wand and why was I listening to him?

"You won't die," I told him. "Don't be silly," I smiled at him before pulling my hand away and pressing his wand against my wrist... cutting it open with a spell before willingly offering him my blood.

"Silly," he said the word like it was funny and he flicked a glance to me before bending his neck and drinking the blood from my wrist.

And I let him... I just let him... There was a war going on around us, trees were catching fire and people were dying... and there I was,_ letting_ him drink my blood like it was the most normal thing in the world. I watched in horror as I brought my free hand up to thread through his hair, moving even closer to him so my lips were pressed against his head...pressed against him like I loved him.

The shock of such a scene is making me sick... it's disturbing and it can't possibly be true...

After a few moments, he pulled back, his teeth coated in blood. He smiled when I brought a hand up to wipe away the blood at the corner of his mouth all _lovingly_. I was smiling at him... he was smiling at me...I felt stick... and then I leaned forward...

I kissed him again.

I kissed him and I kissed him and I kissed him. I kissed him passionately. I kissed him like I loved it... I kissed him with my arms pulling him close... and he kissed back, bringing his hand up to my neck to hold me in place, twisting in my hair when I tilted my head to the right. When I finally pulled back, I added one last kiss against the corner of his lips before exhaling slowly and pressing my forehead to his.

A curse came flying right towards his head, and he deflected it quickly, never once looking away from me...then we broke away and we both turned towards the culprit. Draco was standing there, his wand drawn and his face covered in ash. He looked thoroughly broken and betrayed, but I hardly cared.

"Boyfriend is jealous," Tom said with a smirk, getting to his feet and taking the wand that I handed him. Draco saw the exchange and his eyes narrowed. "Boyfriend is _very_ jealous."

"Step away from her," Draco said, his voice sounding hard, but his wand hand was wavering.

Draco was afraid.

"Oh..." Tom taunted and he smiled down at me. "Boyfriend is trying to be brave, but even he knows he can't beat me in my weakest state, let alone after I've had a bloody pick me up."

Draco blasted a curse and Tom deflected it with another mocking smile. It goes on like like for a few minutes... with Draco shooting curse after angry curse and Tom laughing and laughing... And then Tom stopped smiling and he looked at me with a serious tilt of his head.

"Should I kill boyfriend now?" he asked. I didn't answer and he nodded his head. "I think it might be time for him to die. You think she won't find out what you've been doing?" Tom asked, turning back to Draco with a narrowed eyed glare. "You think she won't figure out the twisted relationships you've built. At least I am honest about who I am and what I want. But you, you are almost masterful in your manipulation. Why don't you tell her?" He asked, nodding to me. "Tell her what your end plan is."

"Shut up," Draco said breathlessly.

The Dark Lord laughed again. "That's almost adorable... Telling me to shut up." He looked at me again, red eyes dark and wicked. "I plan on keeping you alive for a very long time... What does boyfriend plan on doing?"

Draco took that distraction to send another curse and it hit Tom, just barely, but it did graze his face...making a small cut along his cheek where dead black blood started to ooze out. Tom looked murderous then and he started on Draco with a vengeance, throwing curse after deadly curse with all his might. Draco could hardly keep up with onslaught of violence and he ended up falling back after Tom's curses started to crack the shields he was throwing up.

Draco was no match for the Dark Lord... even though he did try his hardest.

Tom eventually disarmed him and pocketed his wand with a smug look on his face. Draco didn't look afraid, his gray eyes were on fire as he looked up at the Dark Lord and when Tom bent down and pressed his wand under his chin, Draco didn't even flinch.

"Game over," Tom hissed, his voice sounding like a snake. "You lose."

He squared his shoulders to do the killing curse, but out of now where, Richard Yaxley Apparated behind Tom and grabbed his hair, jerking his head back to expose his neck and slicing across his throat with a dagger. Black blood covered Draco's face and he sneered before pushing Tom's lifeless body to the side. He wiped off his face with the back of his sleeve and then Yaxley offered his hand to help him up. They started talking to one another. Draco was angry and Yaxley was frantic. I move closer to hear what they're saying, but suddenly they both stop...

And then they both looked at me.

Yaxley was quick, he sprinted towards me and pushed me to my back, tilting the dagger above my stomach before bringing it down... but someone was faster... someone blasted him in the chest and he flew through the air, hitting a nearby tree and blacking out as a fire started to brew within me. Blaise stepped around my body, giving Draco a look as he gripped his wand.

Blaise and Draco started to talk quietly to one another, sending glances to Yaxley with hushed voices and viscous glares.

I pulled myself to my feet and they didn't move for a while as I walked towards them. Then Draco started speaking to me, empty words on empty ears as I bent down to pick up Tom's wand from his dead fingers. They both took a step back when I turned towards them.

They almost looked afraid.

How funny that expression looked on their faces.

And then I started killing people. Order members and Death Eater's alike. Red eyes blazing with the Dark Lord's wand that felt so right in my hand... and I just kept going until my head started to hurt so badly I thought it was going to explode. It was a razor sharp pain and I stumbled a bit when little flashes of light started to dog my vision. I started to petal backwards, retracing my steps over dead bodies as the pain started to grow and pulse and heat and break.

I backed up into a large tree a few feet away from the Dark Lord's dead body and I slumped down until I was sitting with my head in my hands. Everything was hurting... everything was broken...

"Ginny?"

I snapped my head up and saw Draco... his face was ashen as he stared at me with his wand at his side. Blaise was beside him, looking around at all of the damage before spotting Yaxley knocked out by the tree.

"Malfoy..."

"Shut up," Draco cut Zabini off sharply, giving him a sideways look before glancing back at me and taking a step forward. "It's alright."

Yaxley started to wake and he made an awful noise as a white hot pain seared through my body. It was so bad I actually yelped a little and Draco hurried to me, dropping to his knees in front of me and tilting my chin up.

"What have you done?" he whispered, staring over my face and noticing the red eyes.

I blinked through blurry tears and saw Blaise to the side of us, _healing_ Richard Yaxley. "No," I shook my head. "No, don't do that."

Draco and Blaise shared a long look and then Zabini shook his head. "You can't," he said to Draco with his dark hair falling in his eyes. "That's why she's getting so many headaches. She won't be able to take much more-"

"I know," Draco snapped, looking back at me seriously. "I know..."

"What do you know?" I asked, blinking hard when another pain shocked my system.

"You know that I love you," he said, grabbing my face to get him to look at him. "You know that I love you," he repeats as grips his wand. "You will always remember that first, right? You will always remember that I love you."

"Malfoy..." Blaise tried to cut in, but Draco gave him a sharp look that shut him up.

He looked back at me, my eyes weren't red anymore and I look more confused than anything. I looked past his shoulder at Blaise, who was looking so deathly serious, but for a moment he smiled and winked at me. Draco tilted my face towards his, leaning forward to press a soft kiss to my lips before raising his wand and hitting me with a spell...

"You will not remember the last half hour," Draco said, looking at his watch. "You will remember nothing of what you've done or who you've seen."

I blinked once, my eyes suddenly dazed and glassy.

"You didn't see me, you didn't see Zabini, you didn't see Richard Yalxey...Do you understand?"

I nodded a curse nod.

He sighed loudly, putting his hands back on my face and kissing my forehead. Then I started screaming. Screaming as loud and as hard as I could. The noise brought the battle towards us and a fire started...burning up the forest in green flames as I screamed something terrible when the pain in my body became too much to bare.

Tom stepped away from me, pulling us out of the memory so we were back in the chamber. Just me alone with a ghost.

"Do you see?" he asked with a brow raised as he brings his hand like he was going to brush hair away from my face, but his hand goes right through me. "Yaxley made a deal with your devil to end me, but he got too greedy...And your devil has been doing a lot of awful things to you. How many times, do you suppose, he's done that? How many times has he messed with your memories to serve his own purpose?"

"You're lying."

"I'm not," he seriously. "Seeing is believing, is it not?"

"What would his purpose be?" I asked softly, my voice cracking in betrayal.

"That is a good question," Tom said with a smile. "And he isn't the only one who's done that to you. Your mind is scrambled by the people you trust most. Why is that?" he asks. "Maybe its because they've seen you for what you truly are." He tilts his chin down and gives me a serious look. "You're just like me."

"That's not true..."

"Oh, but it is," he says with a smile. "You saw it. In that memory... That wasn't some mix up... it wasn't some magic I placed upon you. That was your true form. I didn't corrupt you. You were corrupted already. It's in your blood, Ginevra. Darkness like that never goes away no matter how hard you try to hide it."

A rumble shakes the walls and we both look up as the ceiling starts vibrating.

"The fight is getting quite heated..."

"What was Yaxley doing down here?" I ask, watching the ceiling at it shakes.

"He wanted to see me," he says with a smirk. "Maybe apologize for slitting my throat."

"He was keeping you in here," I say when it dawns on me. I look down at the black salt scattered by the door. "How did he end up inside?"

"I told you, powerful wizards make powerful spirits. I've always been good at convincing people to do as I want." Another loud bang is heard and Tom smiles. "We should go watch," he says, looking up. "See what our old friends are up to."

He hisses something at the door and it starts to open. On the other side of the threshold is Myrtle. She's sitting there on that old fallen beam and she stands up when we come into view with a smile on her face.

"Isn't he handsome, Ginny?" she asks as she blinks at Tom Riddle like he was just the dreamiest thing she's ever seen.

"He murdered you," I remind her, my voice wavering, but anger lacing each syllable.

"Let's not drag up past transgressions," Tom chides with a tut of his tongue. "It's not polite to do that in front of company."

Myrtle makes a _hmf_ noise and nods her head in agreement. I look down at the salt as Tom walks through it and then he looks over my shoulder, reading my face and realizing what I'm thinking.

"Are you going to barricade yourself inside?" he asks. "I can wait." he says as he crosses his arms and Myrtle laughs, covering her mouth when he gives her an annoyed look. "I don't have to eat, or sleep...I'm perfectly at ease waiting."

"Or have a baby!" Myrtle adds with a jump.

"Or have a baby," Tom repeats, holding out his hand like he wanted to help me through. "Don't be silly. You're among friends."

_Silly._

I hesitate a second, staring into Tom's dark dead eyes before stepping through the doorway and following the ghosts up the old staircase that leads to the third floor bathroom. I am not an idiot. I know they're not my friends, but what other option do I have? Stay in the Chamber until I rot?

_Her skeleton will lie in the chamber forever..._

My right eye twitches and I rub it out with the heel of my palm. Tom walks in front me, his ghostly shoes tapping against the ground as Myrtle floats overhead, singing a song and talking loudly until Tom tells her to leave us. She pouts, her face falling, before she disappears into a pipe.

"If she wasn't already dead," Tom starts when we reach the bathroom. "I would kill her again."

I don't say anything to that. We make our way to the stair cases that move us to the second level where we can see the fight happen in the lower hall beneath us. I run over to the banister when I see George. He's alive, but looking worse for the wear as he fights a death eater like a muggle, fist against fist.

"This is where it happened, you know," Tom says, as he curls his fingers around the back of my nightgown. "What everyone has been looking for since you were just a child."

"What are you talking about?" I ask as I see the Death Eater and George disappear down a corridor.

"It took me a while to find it myself. I tried... so did everyone else... what you saw and heard when you were here..." That makes me pause and I tilt my chin down, catching him out of the corner of my eyes. "Everyone always thinks Harry Potter is the main player, but you've had your own story playing out under everyone's nose and no one even bothered to look until it was too late."

George reemerges, his nose broken, but still alive and I sigh in relief.

"Prophesies are one in a million, but it's the content that truly matters, wouldn't you say?" I turn away from him, back to the battle... where hundreds are fighting and dying. "Dumbledore knew what you were, but he made a choice and he chose Harry Potter. That seems to be running theme in your life, isn't it? Getting passed over when you're in need."

I shake my head.

"Think real hard, Ginny," Tom says as he runs his lips over the back of my head. "Everything you've ever needed to know is right in here. The doors are all open now. "

I blink hard once and look down the hallway. There are some people dueling by the statue of Helga Hufflepuff and I lick my lips nervously.

"Do you remember?" he asks gently. "You were seven."

I could see myself at seven... My hair was cut short and my freckles were darker and more visible than they are now. I liked playing outside. I liked sports, wearing Quidditch Jerseys, and I loved my older brother Charlie the most.

When I was seven, Charlie was sixteen and he was the captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team.

"It was a long game, wasn't it?" Tom says, his lips back at my ear. "It was cold and raining."

I remember that game. Ron and I were huddled under an umbrella in the family section of the Gryffindor stands. The sky was so dark and the rain was so heavy that even with the bright stadium lights, it was hard to see anything. About two hours into it, I had to go to the restroom so my Mom took me to the castle. When I was done, we started to walk out, but we ran into an old teacher of my Mother's. I can't even remember who it was now, but I remember she wore a pointed purple hat and my Mom talked to her _forever_.

Forever to a seven year old is more like fifteen minutes, but I was restless.

I took the time to wander around and look at the things in the hallway. I always loved Hogwarts and I couldn't wait until I was old enough to do magic. I was already pretty good at doing wandless magic on my own, doing little things in my bedroom so my parents wouldn't see... I started to wander further away because my Mom just kept talking and then I decided to ride the moving staircases.

It was a favorite past time of mine whenever we went to the castle.

As I was hopping from stair to stair, someone screeched and I snapped my head up... on to find Professor Trelawney looking horrified.

"Little girl!" she snapped making me freeze with one foot on the stairs. "What in Merlin's name are you doing?"

I didn't say anything, I just kind of stared at her, looking guilty.

"Where are your parents?" she questioned, her big eyes blinking behind ridiculous glasses. "Come here this instant. You're going to hurt yourself. You could fall to your death doing such a thing."

She made a motion with her hand, adjusting her brightly printed shawl in the process.

I looked around for a moment before walking towards her shyly. "My Mom is downstairs," I mumbled, nodding down to the lower levels.

"You should be with her then, not wondering around the castle," she replied, grabbing my hand with ring covered fingers. "This place can be dangerous to an untrained little witch," she said, patting my hand. "Many young ones have died in these halls."

"Died?" I asked, my face twisted in horror.

"Yes," she nodded, wild hair falling over her arm and tickling my cheek. I made a face and moved it out of the way. "And more to come," she said, tapping the spot in between her eyes. "I can see it all, you know. I have the sight."

"The sight?"

She nodded again, smiling at me. "Runs in the family, I'm afraid. A burden I must carry around with me for the rest of my life."

"You can see the future?" I asked and she nodded. "Can you see my future?"

"Oh, my dear, people always want to know what the future holds for them, but they are hardly pleased with the answer."

"Could you tell me?" I asked, ever the curious seven year old. I stopped walking and smiled. "Could you tell me if I'll be famous like Rhonda Raptor?"

"Who's Rhonda Raptor?" she asked, sniffing at the name like it was nothing.

I dropped her hand and turned around to show her the back of my jersey. "Number 15 for the Chuddly Cannons. The best seeker in the league!"

"My, what an accomplishment," she said. When I turned back to look at her, I rolled on my toes in excitement. She laughed for a moment, looking down at me before nodding her head. "Oh, alright," she smiled as she bent down until we were eye to eye. She took my hands in between her own and started making an odd humming noise. "Are you ready?" she asked and I nodded my head. She smelled strange... something spicy and foreign... "Close your eyes."

I clenched my eyes shut.

"No peeking," she said when I opened one eye to see her. "What is your name?"

"Ginny Weasley."

"And age."

"Seven... and a half," I added for good measure and she laughed.

"My, that_ is_ important. Let me see..." she started humming again, gripping my hands tightly. "I see many great things in your future," she said and I opened my right eye to see. She had her eyes closed and she was making the silliest face. "Yes, many friends...good grades...Quidditch team captain..."

"Really?" I said in excitement, opening both eyes.

"The sight never lies."

"What house will I be in?" I asked, believing she was real because I was seven and I had no reason not to.

She hummed for a moment and then her large eyes flicked down to the pin I was wearing that had a picture of Charlie with his Quidditch uniform on it. "Gryffindor." she said and I grinned, rolling on my toes. "Does that please you?"

"Yes. My whole family has been in Gryffindor."

"Because you're brave and noble," she said. "Now, come on. I bet your mother is looking for you."

We started walking again, and I was smiling from the news of my very happy future...until Trelaweny stopped short, make me trip over my own feet.

"Are you alright?" I asked as she stared ahead, her eyes looking glassy and her body rigid. "Um..." I poked her arm. "Are you okay?" I looked around to see if someone could help because I was pretty sure something was wrong... but we were alone in the hallway. Not even a portrait was nearby. "Hello?" I asked, waving my hand in front of her face.

Everything about her was different and when she spoke, her voice wasn't the same. It was different and deep.

"_A darkness..."_

"What?" I ask curiously, tilting my head and frowning at her strange behavior.

"_A darkness rises..." _

"Rises?"

She paused for a second and then her whole body went ridged and her lips curled back into an ugly sneer as her voice boomed across the entire hall.

"_A darkness rises from the ashes in the depths of the Black Hills. Born into blood when the second house falls. An ancient oath is fulfilled when the end of an age draws near and a union forged in fire will reign for one thousand years. An awful love will decide which way the pendulum sways and the daughter of the crow will revive the son of Ishar with blood made of magic. Two paths taken with two promises made, the child of the broken wizard will hold the fate of all..."_

She blinked and then cleared her throat.

"Oh my," she said, blinking rapidly as she licked her lips. "What was that? What did I say?"

"You..."

"Ginevra Weasley!" My Mother found us then and with her was Albus Dumbledore. "I was looking everywhere for you! What are you doing in this part of the castle?"

"I'm sure she was just going on a little adventure," Dumbledore smiled, his blue eyes twinkling behind half moon spectacles."No harm done."

As I walked past, Dumbledore watched me and looked into my mind. I didn't know it then, but I know it now. He saw the speech made to me by a teacher on his pay roll and for a moment the all knowing Dumbledore was perplexed before being concerned.

"He convinced your parents to rid you of that memory when you started having nightmares. For your sake, of course. Good old Dumbledore, savior of all."

Tom presses himself against me again, this time I don't bother to get away from him.

"You were too young to handle the information... too stupid to know these things... too silly to care about...But Dumbledore, he knew... he knew it was about you. About you and me...And Yaxley, that little social climber," he smiles as he presses his lips to my hair again. "Killed me for a promise and he was stabbed in the front after stabbing me in the back. People are just awful, aren't they?"

That was one thing I could agree with.

"Do you know what Ishar means?" he asks curiously.

_The son of Ishar... _

"It's snake language. It means 'The Great Traitor'. I wonder..." he trails off, smiling again. "What traitor that could be." I don't answer and sighs."Do you hear that?"

I shake my head, wanting him to shut up but when he touches me again, I bite my lip. "How are you touching me?" I ask, thinking I must be going mad.

"We're by so much magic," he says motioning to the fight. "It feeds a wizard's soul. Didn't you know that? Now... Close your eyes."

"No."

"Just try," he whispers against my ear. I cringe because I want him to go away but he never does. "Close your eyes and focus. Do you hear it? All those heart beats..."

I do hear them, but I won't let him know that. He already thinks we're so much alike...I don't want to give him anything else to rub in my face. But I do hear them... There are one thousand two hundred and fifty two heart beats in the castle. One thousand two hundred and fifty two heart beats that are thumping and pounding together like war drum...

"All those lives..." he says gently, running his hand up my arm. I close my eyes and shiver at his ice cold touch. "Ours for the taking."

I snap my eyes open and try to slink away from him, but he blocks me, keeping me trapped against his body and the railing.

"It's wonderful, isn't it?" he sighs wistfully and presses himself behind me, curling his hand around mine on the banister. "One of the most beautiful scenes in the world is a colorful curse flying at the peak of a wizards battle."

"And witches," I say, swallowing hard when I feel his nose run along the shell of my ear. "There are witches down there too."

"Of course, you're right," he says and I can feel him smile against my hair. He's going to humor me. "Women have come a long way since my day. Just look at you," he laughs, clearly making fun of me. "What a modern woman you are."

I ignore him and go back to watching the fight that's tearing up the front hall of the castle. Death Eaters and Order members alike are dying for an ambitious man's senseless war...I lean over so I can see better, but he puts his hand on my stomach.

"I wouldn't do that," he says as he taps his fingers down my tummy like he was playing piano keys. "One of them might see you."

I push his hand off of me, but he doesn't seem to care.

"How long until they figure out you're not where you're supposed to be?" he asks, but I don't bother to respond as I rub my eye with the heel of my palm. It's starting to twitch again. "Isn't it that the way it always is? Bossing and pushing poor little Ginny around?"

"Stop talking."

I can feel him smiling and I slide away so I can watch Draco. He's by the front doors, standing next to a broken glass window. He's doing a hell of a job fighting off a dark robed Death Eater. I watch my Draco hit the woman in the chest with the killing curse and she screams so loudly it makes my teeth gnash together. She thumps to the ground in silence and Draco walks over her dead body to move on to his next victim.

Now there are one thousand two hundred and thirty one heart beats.

"You know why they do it? It's because they're afraid of you... Afraid of what you are and what you could become. So many people down there are fighting for their right to tell you what to do," he says, his voice a hiss in my ear. "Who's your boss now?" he asks curiously, making a chill creep down my spine. "Mother?" Father?" he runs his hand along my side as his chin grazes my shoulder. My poor father looks so old and tired... and he's moving so slow... I feel like he won't survive the night. "Family... Friends?" I see Hermione and Pansy fighting side by side... "Boyfriend?"

He pauses and lets the word hang in the air as a curse grazes the side of Draco's face, making a slice along his cheek bone. I inhale sharply to see him hurt, but Draco is a seasoned warrior by now. He doesn't even stop to see the blood before killing the wizard who cast the badly aimed curse.

"And what a boyfriend he is," he adds with his lips by my ear. I tilt my chin down and turn my face slightly to the left so I can see him from the corner of my eyes. He's just a dark shadow behind me and he smiles when we make eye contact.

I promptly look away.

"Now, that one is troublesome," he curls his lips against my ear. "Because it branches off into a million different pieces, doesn't it? Boyfriend... Boyfriend's friends...Boyfriend's family...Boyfriend's government... Boyfriend's army..."

"You say that like you're any different," I snap hatefully, pushing him off again and he laughs... he laughs and he laughs and he laughs...

"In my perfect world," he continues, his cold hand curling against mine on the railing. He starts playing with the engagement ring Draco had given me, rocking it back and forth on my finger. "Everyone else would be beneath you. No one would dare tell you what to do or make you feel inadequate. It would be a punishable offense to talk down to you or tell you you've been wrong when you've been so very right... because you and I," he says, pausing a second to smile. "Are always right."

"Get away from me."

"No," he says simply, like my request was silly and not worth thinking about. "In my perfect world you would only have to answer to me. Just me and no one else. How nice would that be?"

"I shouldn't have to answer to anyone," I whisper, moving my hand from underneath his.

"Now, that's not true," he replies, his hand dancing up my side. "A part of you likes it."

I make a disgusted face and push away from him when he tries to run it over my stomach. The fight below is getting frenzied and hard to watch. There's too much movement... too many colors to properly focus on one thing...It makes my head hurt...and there's fire... the same purple fire with the green core that took my friend.

"You could end this now," he says as I narrow my eyes, my right hand twitching as I stare into the fire. "You know you could."

"Leave me alone."

"All those souls down there," he breathes out slowly, chilling my bones. "My Death Eater's are greatly outnumbered... but they will never stop. You know that...They will never stop and you will never sleep well again. If the Order is successful in taking the castle, what is your government going to do after this is over? Try them and put them in jail? Do you think that will stop the idea?"

I don't say anything as the purple fire pulses.

"No, of course not," he says after a long pause. "You can never kill the idea... it will always linger in the back of your mind and it will never go away... And there are people who will see it come to fruition with or without me," he says motioning to Draco again. "You know what you can do," he says, trailing spider like fingers up my arm. "You know how easy it would be... just like how easy it was for you to break the wards...You know why you were able to that? Because you are like me."

I don't say anything to that.

"Fire is very purifying. It burns out all evils."

"Does it?" I ask, thinking of Luna and her awful death... and her screams that will forever haunt me.

"You know it does," he says, leaning forward so he can see my face. "They will deserve it. They will never stop fighting if you don't do it. They will kill more people... They will always be there. You could end this, Ginevra. You could end them," he says as he touches my hair.

I lick my lips and he taps his fingers against the banister.

"Look at all those people... All those people you claim to love..." He makes a sweeping motion with his hand and I follow the line until I reach my Father. A younger Death Eater has him cornered and is throwing curse after curse right at him.

He falls to the ground, putting up as many shields as he can, but the shields are starting to crack.

I could end this... Tom is right. I could stop this right now. I hate the Death Eater's. I hate everything they stand for and everything they are and I hate that they keep fighting. I look to my father once again... That Death Eater is hovering over him, ready to strike with a killing curse and I can't let that happen...

I lift my hand.

I know the curse well and I know how to control it... I can practically feel Tom's smile when I say the words and a green fire starts to spew out of the tip of my wand. It falls to the ground and grows bigger and longer as it curls down the staircase until it takes the form of the a fully grown Basilisk. The curse kills the Death Eater's, eating them whole and leaving only scorched bones in it's wake. The sound in the hall is chilling as they all scramble for cover, but there's no use. The Fiend Fyre curse I had spent so many nights practicing will only kill those I want it too... and it will kill them no matter where they hide.

It only takes ten minutes before they're all dead and the curse dies with them... falling against the ground and crackling like a true dying fire before disappearing all together.

_The Prometheus project at it's finest... Bringing fire to man. _

"Brilliant," Tom breathes against my ear before he steps back, his body leaving me cold.

Now there are six hundred and eighty heartbeats in the castle... frantically beating in fear and astonishment.

There's a long silence before all six hundred and eighty heartbeats look directly at me. My father is the first to break the silence... He says my name softly as he walks up the stairs with his hand out like he was shielding himself from me.

"Here now," he says when he gets close. He brings his hand out to take the wand from me and I step back. "Oh, honey," he sighs sadly, looking at me brokenly like I had done something that could never be fixed. "What have you done?"

I look behind me. Tom is hiding in the darkness now and I look back at my dad as he gently pries the wand out of my hand.

"It's alright now," he whispers, talking to me gently like I was a feral dog. "It's over."

He goes in like he wants to hug me, but I step back and cross my arms. The thought of being touched right now sickens me.

"Ginny," I know that voice and I look towards the stairs.

Draco runs to reach us and when he does, he moves past my father and puts his hands on my face. He looks terrible... his lips are bloodied and there are dark circles under his eyes. He hasn't slept in days and I doubt the Death Eaters fed him.

"What happened to your neck?" he asks quickly, turning his head to see the gash in my skin. He covers it quickly with his hand. "You've lost so much blood," he points out as he tries to heal it. It closes the wound, but it stings terribly and I nearly cry out. "You need to see a healer."

"Are you okay?" I ask softly because he looks so terrible. Even though I'm not sure what I was feeling... I never want him to be hurt.

"I'm fine," he says as he looks over my face with his brows furrowed. His voice is deep and unnaturally scratchy. I doubt the Death Eaters gave him water either...

"You don't look fine," I admit as I bring my hand up to grab his wrist.

"Neither do you," he says and when I give him an affronted look, he backs off and takes off his cloak... leaving him in an undershirt that's positively filthy.

"What are you..."

"Your nose is bleeding," he says as he uses a bit of the cloak to wipe off my chin and lips before pinching my nose shut. "Tilt you head back," he says, but I just push him away. He looks hurt, but he covers it quickly. "You have a headache?" he asks and I suddenly realize that a do... A terrible headache that feels like someone is taking a pickaxe to my temple.

The lights seems too bright now... the voices too loud... I back up and blink a few times in rapid succession.

"Let's get you out of here," Dad says, taking my arm. "You should see a healer.

_...And a psychiatrist..._ my father thinks sadly and I glance at him as he looks at the scorched spots on the floor. _….What has my little girl done?..._

My father is scared of me.

I look back at the others... they're still staring and I look around until I find Blaise. He's standing by an alcove and there's some blood at the corner of his mouth. His expression is blank and when we make eye contact, he tilts his head in a curious way.

"Gin," Draco takes my hand and I look at him. "Come on," he gently urges me to follow him.

"I do have a headache," I admit as the pounding becomes too much to handle.

"I know," he sighs sadly, like he could feel it too. He starts helping me down the stairs as the whole world stares at me. When we reach the landing, something breaks inside of me and I grab his arm. "What?" he asks quickly and when he looks at me... that way his expression is... He looks so horrified. "Oh, my God," he says, looking over my face like something awful had happened.

"I don't feel well," I say before the walls of Hogwarts start to crumble around me and darkness covers my eyes.

The last thing I hear before I fall is Blaise Zabini commenting on all the blood.

* * *

It's a funny thing about dreams... It's a funny thing that they make you feel so many wild emotions all at once. Twisting and turning and moving too fast and far too slow all at the same time. It's a funny thing how they kill you and bring you back to life a million times over...All in the time frame of a few hours...

I'm walking down a stone staircase surrounded by curved walls that are lined floor to ceiling with dusty shelves full of books. It's a place I've never been before, but at the same time, I feel like it's a place I've always know... A place I've always gone to and a place that could be considered a home... I shake my head at my own silly thoughts and carefully walk down the steps as the sound of the ocean echoes off the walls. It's soothing and it calms me as I make my way deep into the earth. I'm carrying a lantern in my right hand and there's a single black candle inside of it to light my way.

A candle that burns with a green flame that makes the whole place seems sinister.

There's darkness all around me...behind, above, and especially below, where the stairs spiral down into the earth...I feel like I'm gliding on a cloud... The dream making me feel okay even though I'm walking down to hell...To Hades, where the souls of the dead roam free and where I'll spend the rest of eternity by the side of my king...

The books around me have no titles. Maybe they did at one time, but now they're too old... they're too worn and nearly every spine is broken like they had been read a million times and then a millions times more. I dance my fingers along the shelf as the water hums beneath me and I start singing a song to break the silence.

"_Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens...Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens..._" I stop when I hear an odd noise and I tilt my head. When it doesn't repeat, I shake it off and start singing some more. "_Brown paper packages tied up with strings...These are a few of my favorite things." _

Those aren't really my favorite things. Do I have favorite things?

"_Spaghetti with meat balls and cupcakes with icing... _"I attempt my own version of the song. _"Playing some Quidditch and then going biking..."_Do I really like those things enough to add to a song? I shrug and continue. _"Having some friends who actually care about me... These are a few of my favorite things..."_

My voice echos off the walls and ruffles a few dust bunnies.

"_Reading a good book and kissing my boyfriend..." _I make a face at that lyric and add a bit more. _"Even though is a big fucking liar...Some days I think I should kill him with fire...And tell all his friends I wouldn't do such a thing... These are a few of my favorite things..."_

Something thumps to the ground behind me and I stop singing.

I look over my shoulder, holding the lantern in the direction of the noise. It's one of the books...and it's just laying a few steps above me like it had always been there. I tilt my head curiously, but nearly drop the lantern when it opens of it's own accord. I even fumble down a few stairs, nearly falling into the darkness when the pages start to flip frantically.

With a final whoosh of air, the flipping stops, resting somewhere in the middle of the ancient book.

I look into the darkness before walking towards it and sitting down on the step, pulling the book to my lap so I can read it properly. The pages are yellowed and held together with twine. The corners are dog eared and crumbling...but what I see on the page makes me curious. There's a painting of a redheaded wizard in velvet black robes. In his hand he's holding a jewel incrusted dagger that has the head of a crow carved into it's handle. It's the wizard I remember seeing in a dream... A wizard who made an awful deal with a dying witch to save her children.

_Edmund the Marvelous, Born in the year 482 C.E._

"Edmund the Marvelous," I whisper, feeling the name on my lips and liking how it curls around my tongue.

I turn the page to read more, putting the lantern to my side_. _It casts a wicked looking shadow against the wall and some hair falls in my face so I quickly tuck it behind my ear.

_Edmund Crow, known as Edmund the Marvelous, was a dark wizard that lived during late antiquity and into the middle ages. The earliest recorded __Metamorphmagus__ in wizardry history, he could change his appearance at will and used his ability to gain access to the muggle courts across Europe and Asia..._

There's another picture...One of a coin with a coat of arms on it. _A dagger and a crow..._I run my fingers over the seal before continuing, letting my eyes skip over each printed word.

_Son of the Great Wizard Ewlfred Crow and the High Witch of the North Ester of Sedania, Edmund was best known for being the leader of the separation movement which lead to the Great Divide in the year 565 C.E. The rumored writer of the Unequal Doctrine, Edmund is also accredited with developing the first plague curse that devastated human history. The Black Death killed up to 200 million muggles between 1348-1350, leaving a majority of the magical population unharmed... _

I make a face at the picture that follows the entry. It's a drawing of dead bodies with open sores, piled on top of each other in a city square. I jump ahead a few paragraphs when I see my last name... and I hold the book closer, squinting against the awful lighting so I can see.

_He was known by non-magical people as a crafty warlock who would find his way into high ranking positions with deceptions, stealing fortunes and stirring wars across nations. His Metamorphmagus abilities let him change into the form of animals, often shifting into a snake or a crow to taunt his victims. His preferred form was that of a weasel, lending to the superstition that if a weasel crossed your path, death was sure to follow. _

_He took the surname Weasley in the summer of 547 after killing the King Of Gweynedd, Maelgwn Gwnedd. The king allegedly claimed that the famous Edmund was no great sorcerer, but a 'weasley' jester in disguise... _

_Weasley... _I think of my family and turn the page.

_He was put to death over three hundred times and is said to have liked the feeling of fire, purposely seeking out that method of death and torture. There are five known cases of identity switching during his executions. According to Herodius, Edmund would force a member of the royal family to consume a potion that would take on his likeness. He would then swap places with the muggle before the execution was to take place and watch with the family as they were murdered. _

_Out of the five switched bodies, three were crown princes, one was a princess, and one was a King. Three had their heads chopped off, one was hanged in a public square, and another was stoned to death. All returned to their own appearance after death, creating a frenzy in the watching crowd... _

I let my eyes trail towards the bottom of the section as a bone chilling wind climbs up the stair case.

_He was killed by Lancaster Malfoy in the fall of 1435 at the age of nine hundred and fifty three. His unnaturally long life is attributed to the rumor that he mastered the Horocrux curse first created by Herpo the foul... _

Another book falls and I jump.

I look around before standing up with the lantern and walking towards it.

_The History of the Black Hills._... I pick it up and put the lantern on one of the shelves. There's a photo of a creepy looking cave that goes deep into the earth on the title page, drawn in black ink. _The Black Hills hold one of the strongest pockets of pure magic in the known world... _I turn a few pages until I find another picture.

It's a beautiful woman with red hair flowing down a jewel encrusted dress. She has piercing blue eyes that almost glow behind her lashes and she's wearing a pear choker that holds a black stone at her throat. The stone has an intricate _W _carved into it.

_Miriam of the house Weasley. Died in the summer of 1435. Her severed head was found by a family member who recognized her bright hair as he was walking through a field. Miriam's murder ignited the one hundred years war with the House of Malfoy. It's believed the rest of her remains are scattered along the black hills. _

Another book falls and I swallow hard before picking it up as well.

_Blood Bonds and Bindings: Magic of the ancient world..._

I hear someone start to whistle and I look down into the darkness..._A darkness rises from the ashes in the depths of the Black Hills..._I shake my head to get that voice out of my head and I put the books down because I don't want to read anymore..._Born into blood when the second house falls..._

_The second house... The second house... The second house... The second house... The second house... _

I feel something wet on my lips and I bring my hand up to feel, pulling back and seeing blood on my finger tips. I pick up the lantern and start my way down the stairs with curiosity pushing me forward...The rain boots are squeaking with each step and the nightgown does nothing to stop the coldness that's creeping up from the pit.

I walk forever... for years it feels like... until I spy a light at the end of a dark tunnel. It's a green fire that shows a brick lined path leading further into the wet earth. I walk towards the light, my heart thumping against my ribcage and speeding up when I hear someone start humming a song again_. _It's a pleasant enough voice, one of a woman. When I reach the light, a door opens to the left of me, revealing a small room that looks like someone's homely kitchen.

The yellow walls are completely covered in odd looking instruments... Some I can tell are actual pots and pans... but others seem more sinister...with sharp edges and shining blades covered in dried blood. I swallow hard and take a step forward because something inside of me tells me to. There's a double sink on the right side of the wall covered in rust and above that is mirror, held in a silver frame that's carved to look like the outline of a forest. At the heart of the room is an extremely large table... It's dark wood burned with odd looking symbols I don't recognize_. _

I hear footsteps and a second later an old woman walks into the room from a nonsexist door in the wall, holding a stack of folded white towels. She's humming to herself, the same song I heard on the stairs that brought me down here. She resembles the typical witch of muggle nightmares... with her hair, wild and gray, piled on top of her head in an messy bun and her nose, large and crooked, covered in warts. She's hunched over with a very large lump protruding from her back under ratty clothes that look like they haven't seen a wash board in ages.

I take a step back... but hit the wall.

I send a panicked look behind me, expecting to see the opening to the tunnel, but that's gone now. It's like there never was a door and I send another scared look to the old woman, realizing I'm stuck now in this windowless, doorless, room under the earth.

"_Down in the valley where the darkness lies..._" She's singing now, ignoring me completely as she sets up the towels on the table. Unfolding them and laying them out as her ragged voice continues on. "_The big old beast could hear the children's cries..."_ She goes over to the wall and taps her bony finger against her lips before grabbing one of the scary looking instruments that's made of metal and looks like it could kill a man. _"He came one night with his blood red eyes..." _She starts washing her hands in the sink. _"And killed them all under moonlit skies..."_

I must have made a noise because she looks my way. She grins, showing crooked yellow teeth rotting in her head.

"Finally," she says, walking towards me with rickety steps. Her eyes are black... as dark and soulless as a moonless night. "I've been waiting for you..."

"Waiting?" I whisper.

"Yes,waiting. A very long time, indeed," she nods. "You're lucky you didn't wait any longer," she says, taking my hand. "You can't just have a baby by yourself..."

"Baby," I say, my brain feeling foggy.

"Just look at you," she says, motioning to my legs. I look down and see that the white nightgown is stained with blood at the meeting of my thighs. "Leaking all over the place."

"But I don't..." I shake my head. "I don't feel any pain or anything..."

"You will," she says as she pats the table where she placed all those towels. "But lets not dwell on that."

I sit on the table top and she opens a cabinet, showing rows of colorful potions.

"This is a dream," I point out... I've just never been this lucid before. It's a funny thing about dreams... you never know what's going to happen when you're in them.

"Of course it's a dream," she says like I was silly. She taps the the bottles with her nails, poking and shaking some with those bony fingers of hers. I can see my reflection in the silver mirror above the sink... and what I see is frighting...There's blood everywhere... coming from my nose, my ears... it even looks like my eyes have been bleeding and crying blood red tears.

"What happened to me?" I ask as I bring a hand up to the dried blood... only to see my hands are covered in it too.

"Great magic asks for great sacrifices," she sings, turning to me with a glowing red potion in her hand. "Drink this now. The pain will be coming soon."

"Who are you?"

"I'm your fairy Godmother," she smiles, clearly joking as she pushes the vial into my hand. "All little girls wish for one of those, don't they? A good fairy to come in to make everything perfect and right... if only for a night."

"I don't believe in any of that," I say, putting the potion down. "And I'm not drinking this."

"Well, then you only have ten seconds," she says, looking at a sand timer on the wall.

"Ten seconds for-"

I don't get to finish that question because pain unlike anything I have ever felt before courses though my body. I fall back, my head smacking against the table as my spine curls and a high pitched scream leaves my throat. I scrap nails against my thighs and clench my eyes shut when the torture pierces every part of my body.

The crone presses the potion bottle to my lips. "Drink," she urges. "It will deaden the pain."

I don't even care if it kills me. I drink all of it in one swallow and bunch the nightgown of my dress up with sweaty hands, wishing for the pain to subside. It get's to an almost unbearable level when the woman sets up camp at the end of the table and uses a pair of scissors to cut off my shorts and knickers.

"No. No," I mumble through the pain, knocking my knees together and actually kicking her in the chest when she takes off the wellies.

She laughs before becoming very serious, looking me with dark lidded eyes. "You are having this baby right now. I would suggest you let me help you."

"I want to wake up now," I say, closing my eyes and laying back again. "I want to wake up now..."

"Keep hoping for that," she says as she goes back between my legs, doing things I can't see with a crooked looking wand. "And listen to me when I tell you to push."

I open my eyes and look up. Something is carved into the ceiling... It's a six pointed star... A star that almost looks like the star of David... but the lines are too curved... and inside each triangle is the likeness of an animal.

"That represents the six major families that led the Great Divide," she says. I can feel the sweat on my forehead. It feels like it's pooling all over my body. "When witches and wizards officially broke away to create their own world. That's your family," she says, but I don't look at her. The pain is too great. "At the top. You were a Crow before you were a Weasley."

_The daughter of the Crow..._

I scream loud when the woman tells me to push.

"I like Weasley better," she says with a little smile as she looks over my knees. "People underestimate a Weasley. That's what people don't understand. You can have loud tyrants, proud kings, and overbearing lords, but its the quiet ones that stand in the shadows and whisper suggestions that truly burn down empires."

"Empires," I repeat because I can't say anything else.

"Empires," she says, but her voice is different. It's deeper. "You are the product of one of the oldest, strongest, purest blood lines in history. You should have never allowed anyone to treat you the way they have."

I arch my back and clench my fists when another contraction tears through my body.

"Immortality isn't reached through spells or potions, it's true form is through the blood line...through the family you create." I want to rest. I want to stop. I would give up anything in the world to make it stop. "Power is not won through force. It's won through confidence. Confidence in your beliefs and your magic and the way you carry yourself. Someday the veil will be lifted and you will see... you will see that you've been sitting on top this whole time. You are not to be abused," she says, her voice low like a man. "You are the abuser."

"Abuser," I repeat, looking up at the ceiling... seeing a swan in one of the triangles.

"House of Branon," he says. He sounds like a man now, but I don't have the energy to look. "The second house of the great six families."

_The second house...The second house...The second house..._

"And the second house has fallen. Everything it stood for... everything it was...Everything it ever would be... is gone."

I think of Luna and her pendent. How she was all that was left of her family... all that was left of her line...

"Tom is still around," I point out, looking up as the star starts spinning and the animals come to life. One of them is a snake and I know that belongs to the House of Slytherin. "Tom will never be gone."

"Tom Riddle was the son of a degenerate inbred witch and a pompous muggle. He is no threat to you."

_An awful love..._

God, this hurts.

"There is so much pain," he agrees as I push again until something inside of me breaks. "The world is a wild and wonderful place, filled with horrible people."

"People who kill," I say through a scream, seeing the flames of the castle in my minds eyes... Seeing the purple flame of death.

"People who do nothing," he corrects me. "Those people are horrible. Lazy people. People who refuse to stand up and fight for something... anything... those people are the true evil in our world. If you don't stand for anything, how can you ever expect to fly?"

I scream again. I scream for hours as the animals on the ceiling jump and slithering and fly around each other in some kind of demented dance. The crone tells me stories... fables and wild tales that couldn't possibly true as I push through the night and well into the next day. I hear a high pitched wail of a new life after tortuous hours of labor, but I want nothing to do with it. I want to pass out and sleep for a full year. But I can't. Not when a shadow hovers over me and places a weight against my chest.

"Hold him," he says. I crack my eyes open, cradling the weight to my chest and looking at the voice.

Above me is a red haired man with eyes as red as blood cloaked in midnight robes. "See," he moves sweaty hair away from my face so I can look down. For a second I have the horrid thought of the thing having scales like a monster... but what I see is just a baby. A baby with copper colored hair slightly darker than mine.

"He looks like you."

The man bends down and presses his lips to the babies soft head.

"New baby smell," he says with a smile, flicking red glowing eyes to mine. He has a square jaw and a crooked nose that looks like it'd been broken a few times. Edmund the Marvelous didn't look half as marvelous in real life, but there was a presence about him... an aura that lingered in the air when he spoke. The same aura that followed Tom when he was at his finest. "There is nothing like it. If there was such a thing as heaven, I believe it would smell of this."

The man moves and I lean down to press my nose to baby's head. "It does smell like heaven," I whisper as I brush my lips over his forehead. "I like it."

"Of course you do. Flesh of my flesh. Blood of my blood... "

"Ginny!" Someone is always yelling my name.

I look up at the red haired man again and we smile at one another as the room starts to fall away... piece by piece... brick by brick... It all crumbles until I'm left in a large empty cavern. Large and dark and wet... Everything is gone and I'm left with is a sobbing naked baby in a cave made for dragons.

"Sh..." I whisper as I wrap a bloodied towel around him, holding him close. I'm not on a table any more. There is no longer warm fire or soft towels... I'm just on the hard ground made of rugged stone and I can hear water dripping somewhere from the high ceilings. The only light is a wand glowing a few feet away... but it's not my wand. It's some kind of crooked stick looking thing and I give it a look before going back to the baby and trying to sooth his cries. "It's alright.."

He keeps crying... He keeps screaming...His face is red and his screams are echoing around the cavern. I don't know the first thing about having a baby...but the screams trigger something inside of me and with a shaking hand I lower the strap on my nightgown. It takes a few tries before the crying stops and he latches on for the first time.

...And suddenly everything was fine...Suddenly everything was perfect for the first time in my life...

I stare at him, using my bloodied fingers to touch his hand and the side of his cheek. I hear footsteps, but I ignore them as I study the child in my arms.

"I don't want to move just yet," I saw to whoever just took a knee beside me.

"You are going to have to see a healer." I glance to my left... where I see Draco. He puts a cloak around my shoulders and sends a troubled look down my body. "He could get sick down here," he says, his eyes sad and dark.

"He won't," I say, knowing in my heart that's true. "He will never get sick."

Draco doesn't say anything as a darkness begins to cloud my vision. I hear a chiming in my head... an ancient promise finally coming to fruition...

_When the seventh moon is the second house, a powerful union between the two families will set the world on fire...and from the ashes we will rise a race not burdened in it's contempt...but reveling in it's discord... _

I feel a smile creep to my face because the world is a wild and wonderful place.

* * *

"Are you sure?"

"Of course," the witch tells me. She has a hook nose and awful smelling breath. "He had a stash of them. Was able to grab a few before they burned the place down."

"If I find out that you're lying," I tell her, looking her square in the eye. "I will kill you."

She nods, and for a moment she looks frightened. She knows who I am and what I can do.

"Good," I tell her, handing her the bag of coins and taking the vial from her. I hold it up to get a better look before quickly tucking it into my pocket and checking the time.

I'm late.

I leave without saying a good bye and throw up my hood. I don't need to be recognized doing dealings in this seedy alleyway... not with the reputation I already have thanks to that night at Hogwarts. It's February now... and the weather has been deary and cold. I stuff the hands into the pockets of my coat and get to safe App zone where I lift my wand and land in the forest outside of a muggle church. It's a new building that has ugly yellow bricks and large windows that remind me of a prison, but I go in anyways because this is the only place where I feel truly at ease.

Inside, I find my group in one of the choir rooms, sitting in a circle on metal chairs. Kristi, the group leader, sees me first and stands up when I approach.

"I'm sorry I'm late," I tell her as I take off my coat, placing it on a table nearby and taking my empty seat. "I got held up."

Kristi nods her head. "It's alright, just try not to be late again."

I nod my head because I know the rules. If you're late two times, you're asked to leave. This group has stiff guidelines, but it helps us all to heal in ways other places can't. I glance at the cross hanging from the wall and quickly look away. We're not affiliated with any religion here, but we have to use the church because it's the only place that will let us do it for free. There's nothing quite like a man being tortured on a block of wood to make you feel all good about yourself.

"Alright," Kristi takes out her notes and a pen. "Before we get into our meeting, is there anything anyone would like to talk about?" she asks, looking around the room at the other broken women who refuse to meet her eyes. "This is a free and safe place to open up," she says for the millionth time. "No one here will judge you on your feelings or decisions."

"I went home for the weekend." Pam, a college aged girl with short brown hair speaks first. "For my Grandma's birthday," she explains, flicking uneasy eyes around the room. "My abuser was there too. I had to sit across from him when we had cake and I just kept on having this fantasy... He was smiling and laughing... and I just wanted to jump across the table and stab my fork into his neck." She starts tugging on the sleeves of her hooded sweatshirt uneasily. "He smiled at me once, asked me how school was..."

She trails off for a second, her eyes getting blurry.

"How did you respond?" Kristi asks gently.

Pam takes a moment to wipe her eyes, crossing her arms tightly over her breasts. "I told him school was fine," she admits and then she starts laughing a humorless laugh. "Like it was nothing. Like it was normal... like..."

_Like he didn't rape me_, her thoughts scream, but she doesn't say it out loud. Pam was molested by an older cousin when she was a girl. She never told anyone until she joined the rape support group. Even though we're urged to turn in our abusers, most of the women here don't... because they're too ashamed... or too embarrassed by what their friends and family will think...

Sissy talks about her ex-husband next. How her two children still ask about him and wonder why he can't visit them in their studio apartment. Sissy starts crying before she can finish. Her husband raped her a few times early in their marriage and didn't have the courage to leave until twelve years later... after he gave her a black eye that couldn't be covered with cosmetics or long sleeved shirts.

There are different kinds of monsters in the world, I was learning. Not all of them had a wand and warped ideas about blood purity.

After Sissy is done speaking, and Kristi gives her words of encouragement, it's time to get on with the nightly topic.

"Betrayal," Kristi says, looking around the group with her squinting hazel eyes. She's a plump middle aged woman with some kind of degree in psychology. She speaks sharply, but her tone is always some how warm in it's delivery. She kind of reminds of Professor Sprout and that makes me sad. "Tonight I want to talk about the times when we've felt betrayed." She leans back and adjusts her bra strap with a quick tug of her hand. "By our abusers... family members... even strangers who've been insensitive. Often times the feeling of betrayal hurts worse than the actual act of abuse."

She gives us a few minutes to think before turning to a thin woman named Karla who's missing a couple top teeth. I'm pretty sure she's a drug addict.

"Remember this is an open forum," Kristi says after Karla's hesitation. "Free of judgment and full of support. Nothing you could say will be held against you. We are allowed to feel things, even if they seem extreme to some... Trauma buries a lot... A lot of feelings we are entitled to. Now, Karla, can you think of a time when you felt betrayed?"

Karla starts scratching her face, picking at open sores that she won't leave alone. "I feel betrayed by my Mother."

"Why do you feel betrayed?" Kristi presses, leaning forward.

"She walked in on my step-dad touching me when I was fourteen." She picks at a scab until it starts bleeding and another woman hands her a tissue. "Said it was my fault for wearing such short shorts around him when he was drinkin'." I feel bad for her, so I look down at my lap. "I left home when I was sixteen... told her that he'd been touching me long before that day she caught him. She called me a liar... said I just wanted attention... told me Ray had been good to us, put a roof over our head and a meal on our table and I was just ungrateful. I'll never forgive her for sayin' that to me."

"Usually the people around us don't know how to handle the truth of sexual abuse," Kristi says, stepping in right as Karla starts to cry. "Many can respond rather cruelly."

"The kids at my school said I made it all up." Tosh, a black girl with dreads, breaks in with a dour voice. "Kyle was my boyfriend. Everyone liked him and he played football...After I told what happened to me, they all said I was trying to ruin his life because he wanted to break up. The police wouldn't do anything. They couldn't prove it wasn't consensual because I had been drinking. I was passed out, how could I have said yes?"

Tosh had been at a party and had too much to drink... She woke up with her boyfriend on top of her and his friends taking pictures.

"Everybody just thought I was a drunk slut who got caught and made a story up to save my ass. No one believed me. I felt betrayed by everyone."

I think of Draco, how he tricked me into a bonding the first time we had sex...

Kimber goes next. She's a mouse of a woman who wears clothes three sizes too big. "I felt betrayed by my sister," she admits in a quiet voice. She speaks less than I do, which is saying something considering I barely speak at all. "She wasn't even being mean... She was trying to comfort me... I was telling her about my nightmares..." She flicks a glance to Kristi who nods. "She told me it was over now. It was all okay and I should just get over it. Get over it?" she furrows her light eyebrows. "I will never get over it."

A heavy silence falls over the group as we get lost in our own darkness.

"Our past is like a scar," Kristi says. "One that can't be seen by the outside world, but we know it's there. The pain may fade over time, but the memory won't. It will always be there to remind you of what happened and that's okay. It's officially a part of who we are... It's a part of our story as women... as survivors... but it doesn't define us."

A few other women go before it's my turn and I slouch a little in my chair when everyone looks at me. There's a fine line between the pronunciation of 'Ginny' and 'Jenny'... and Kristi gets it wrong every time.

"Jenny," she smiles at me. "It's your turn now."

I hesitate a second before clearing my throat and sitting straight. "I feel betrayed..." I think of Tom. He didn't betray me. He was evil and I shouldn't have expected anything else. "I feel betrayed by my body," I admit softly, resisting the urge to scratch my thighs. "My abuser knew me since I was little," I whisper. "It was like I was possessed, completely under his spell..." I trail off as I think of Folk Hills and the awful thing that happened there. "The first time it happened I was cursed..." I trail off when I see the looks on their faces and I'm quick to cover. "I mean it felt like I was cursed. He drugged me. I thought he was my boyfriend... I thought..." I shake off my memories of Tom on top of me. "I consented because I thought he was someone I loved." I shake my head. "I should have known better. I should have seen it... The second time there were no tricks, he was just stronger than I was. I will never forget that feeling." My voice takes a darker town as I cross my arms. "The feeling of being so much weaker than another person."

Kristi goes to say something, but I cut her off.

"I also feel betrayed by my friends and family..." Kristi presses and I blink a few times. "They always want me to forget what happened. They think if they get rid of my memories, then I will be fine. I was stuck with my abuser for months and when I was finally rescued, my mother said 'at least nothing worse happened' before I even got a chance to tell her. I knew then I could never tell them about the... about it," I say because I can't say the word out loud. "Not when she was looking at me so hopefully... and no one asked. No one asked because if they asked, I think I would have felt better... I would have unburdened myself... but no one asked."

"That's the worst," Pam agrees as she chews on her hoodie string. "I feel like I would tell my parents... I would tell them if they asked. Why didn't they notice I was afraid of him? Whey didn't they notice when I would cry and scream whenever they wanted to go to my aunt and uncles house? Why didn't they ask me?"

Kristi has some words of wisdom for us before it passes on to the girl beside me who felt betrayed by her teacher for reporting the rape when she begged her not to. The group is a very depressing affair, but I feel better knowing I'm not the only one in the world who's broken. There are plenty of war groups in the wizarding world, of course... but none of them dealt with sex abuse and I feared what would happen if I was seen at one anyways.

What would people say?

After the groups over, Kristi hands out little packs of cookies and sends us on our way. I walk out with Pam and Tosh... finding myself drawn to them only because they're the closest to my age. Pam is skittish and jumps at most loud noises and she nearly jumps out of her skin when someone closes a car door.

"Simmer down," Tosh tells her tiredly. "Nothing to be afraid of."

"That's a stupid thing to say," Pam says, chewing on her hoodie string again. "We should be afraid of everything."

Tosh shrugs as I start opening the package of cookies. They're chocolate and I like the way they taste. We walk Pam to the bus stop and wait there until it picks her up. We don't speak to one another and the only noise is the crunch of the cookies I'm eating and the unraveling of Pam's hoodie string.

"This is me," Pam mumbles as the bus approaches and slides up beside us. She hops on, but looks over her shoulder. "Thanks for waiting," she says before finding her seat and disappearing down the street.

I say goodbye to Tosh and go to walk off. I have to walk deep into the woods before Apparating so no one sees me, but Tosh says my name and I turn towards her.

"What happened to your abuser?" Tosh asks as cars drive past. "You said you were with him for months before you were rescued. Did he kidnap you?"

"Something like that," I admit as I crunch up the wrapper and stuff it in my pocket.

"I'm sorry," she says, shaking her head. "I shouldn't have asked."

"No, it's alright," I say, sparing her a little look. "He's dead now."

"There are little blessings in this life," Tosh says, laughing at her own thought as I curl deeper into myself. "I would give anything to kill Kyle. Sometimes the fact that he's going to die one day is all I have to get me through it. At least he can't hurt you anymore."

"I guess," I admit as Tosh takes out her car keys. "But he still haunts me."

"Don't they always?"

She waves me off then and I stuff my hands into my pockets, walking deep into the woods before taking out my wand and Apparating. I live in an apartment complex in a muggle neighborhood that's right behind a really nice shopping center. The only Apparation point I can use is one that's on the other side of a nearby lake, so it's a long walk to my flat. My thoughts keep my company and I use my key to get inside of the building, taking the elevator up to the fifth floor where my place is.

It's nice enough, I guess. Mostly middle class couples who are in their last apartment before buying an actual house live here...And a couple of drug dealers... No matter how nice a place is, they always seem to find their home, don't they?

I open the door to my flat with a different key and hang up my coat when I get inside, pulling the vial from my pocket and holding it up to the light. It's red like everyone elses...but a part of me feels like it should be green or blue... something fit for an evil wizard...

It's freezing in here, so I go over to the thermostat and shake my head when I see the temperature. I turn up the heat and heel up of my boots before going to the bathroom where I hide the vial in the medicine cabinet behind my anti-depressants. No one will look back there, anyways. I've had to go to counseling twice a week after _that_ whole ordeal and my new psychiatrist just keeps giving me new drugs to try. I don't really mind them, I guess. They do manage to help with the nightmares...

I go to my bedroom and take a seat at my writing desk. It's home to an ancient typewriter that my father had found at a pawn shop and I love it. I run my hand through my hair and just look at it for a moment...I got my hair cut to my shoulders a few weeks ago and it still throws me off how short it is. If I was braver, I would have cut it all off like a boy so I would never have to worry about it again.

But I'm not brave.

I pull out a fresh piece of paper and put it in the machine, sitting up straight and squaring my shoulders as I place my fingers on the keys. Then I start typing... word after word... line after line... I keep going even when I hear the front door open. I keep going even when I hear Judith's voice calling to me and I keep going even when I hear the second bedroom door close. I like the way the type writer sounds. The clicks, the taps, the clanks... I think next I'd like to get a computer. I hear they're wonderful... Like little boxes of magic...

After a while, Judith starts to scream and I sigh loudly.

This happens every week. I roll my eyes and scoot the chair back, giving the writing desk a longing look before leaving the room and running into Judith in the hallway.

"You won't believe this!" she yells, with her eyes near to tears. "He's been acting strange all day... I knew something's been wrong all week! I think he might be possessed."

"Possessed?" I ask with a brow up as I walk towards the second bedroom. "He's a baby."

"But something isn't right with him," she says with a frightened voice. "Something is not right! He's been putting things in my mind. Awful things!"

"Shut up," I sigh tiredly as I open the door.

Every bit of furniture...every toy and every decoration is flying about the room. Spinning three feet off the ground... and there he is... sitting up in the crib and chewing on a block like nothing was wrong.

"You're scaring your poor babysitter," I tell him as I pull out my wand. I make everything settle back into place and Judith gasps when she sees it. She starts mumbling something about the devil and the church and I roll my eyes again as I lean down to pick him up. He's happy to see me and he grabs onto some of my hair when I press my lips to his cheek. "Next time we'll have to hire an atheist, yeah?" I ask before kissing his temple. "Maybe they won't bring the devil into it so quickly."

I'm sure he agrees. We've already gone through three nannies and each one ends up thinking he's some sort of demon child. It starts off small... with things moving and doors shutting...the temperature drops and fear sets in... Then it graduates to shadows and images. He can't help it, though. He's just a baby and can't control his magic yet.

Judith makes an effort to run out of the room, but I slam the door quickly and lock it with a flick of my wrists.

"This is the last time," I tell him, letting him lay his head against my shoulder. He should be taking a nap now, but he always starts up when he's tired. "Alright," I nod my head and then turn to the poor woman who's sobbing and scratching at the door. "Don't do that," I tell her, flicking my wand so she's forced to face me. "I want my security deposit back."

"What are you?" she blubbers as her frantic eyes flick between me and the baby...and then to my wand that's glowing an odd green color.

"I'm sorry," I admit. "This is really the last time I will do this to you... or your mind is going to go to mush," I say more to myself than to her because, of course, she doesn't know what's happening.

"What are you going to-"

I lift my wand and do the familiar spell. It hits her in the chest and a glazed look comes to her eyes. "You didn't see anything strange today... Everything was normal and you were never scared."

She nods her head.

"Now, go home and drink some tea. Take a bath... relax... and come back tomorrow feeling refreshed and happy."

She nods again before leaving and I feel that guilt thing that gets stuck in my chest each time I do that to someone. The baby makes a noise so I look down at him.

"I know," I tell him, nodding my head as I walk towards the rocking chair, picking up his bottle on the way. "We could always just get a witch to watch you, but then that would defeat the purpose of what we're trying to achieve."

Peace. That's all I strive for right now and being around magical people makes me sick.

"Although, I bet you'd scare witches too," I admit, smoothing back his hair. "You do way too much magic for your age."

He can hold his own bottle, so I cradle him against me and let him feed himself. His hair looks nearly brown now since it's grown, but I can still see traces of the Weasley red every time the sun hits it just right. I smooth down some stubborn strands by his ear and smile when his dark eyes look into mine. He smiles too, making his eyes crinkle up in a way that melts my heart. He grabs his foot with his right hand and stares at the ceiling, chewing on the bottle, causing milk to slide down his cheek.

I wipe it off with my thumb and then bend down to kiss him again.

Blaise was right, I do love him... and now that he's born it seems impossible that I could have ever felt any other way. Maybe that's the great tragedy of it all...Or the great triumph...

Ethan makes a noise and I smile down at him... I wonder if he likes his name... Of course, Narcissa probably finds it incredibly muggle sounding, but I don't care. I had a million names to choose from. A thousand things I could name him... I had many men who died during the war who he could have been named after... many people that I loved and admired... Charlies... Fred... even Abraxas crossed my mind before I decided that this was a new beginning and my child would have a name that was all his own.

Ethan was a character in a children's book I once read. He was brave and fair and always optimistic...traits I find very appealing as of late... But mostly I named him Ethan just because I like the way it sounds.

It's as simple as that.

His last name is Malfoy, just because Draco was there and insisted, but he doesn't look like any Malfoy I have ever seen. He has more Weasley in him than anything, but his hair is too dark and his eyes are a toffee color that are rimmed in dark brown. Narcissa claims such a look comes from her side of the family... Even though it's obvious that he got the color from me. It was desperate lie, if I've ever heard one...because I think she suspects something awful as well.

Sometimes I'll look at him and convince myself I see Draco in his features... Sometimes I see someone else and that makes me feel ill... but I have to convince myself that, just like his name... his features are all his own and he shouldn't be judged on resemblance to anyone else. Because he is Ethan and he is mine and he is perfect.

With Judith gone, I know I won't get anymore writing done, so I settle back in the rocking chair and start humming a song. Ethan's eyes start to droop and he puts his fingers on my lips... He's always does it right before falling asleep and I smile again as I watch the drowsiness overtake him.

Then he wakes up when the buzzer goes off.

"Shhh..." I whisper when he starts crying. He rarely cries, so it startles me. I cuss under my breath and stand up with him against my chest, bouncing him up and down in an attempt to calm his as I stomp into the hallway.

I get to intercom and press one of the buttons.

"Yes?" I ask sharply, pushing Ethan's bottle into his mouth in an attempt to get him to stop screaming.

There's a seconds pause and I exhale in frustration.

"This is number 516. Who are you looking for?"

There's another silence.

"Hello?" I ask when I hear someone breathing. "Are you looking for someone?"

"You," a voice answers.

I raise my eyebrows and press my lips to Ethan's hair. It's Draco. I haven't seen him in four months. Not since I moved to this place and cut everyone off so I could be alone and work some things out. He see's Ethan, of course...I'm not completely awful. Every three weeks when I meet my mother in Diagon Ally to hand him off for the weekend...That's when he can spend time with the son he thinks is his...

"How did you find me?" I ask softly, staring at the intercom and imaging Draco's face.

"Can I come up?" he asks, his voice low and upset.

Ethan has stopped crying and he's looking curiously at the intercom, reaching sticky fingers out to touch one of the buttons. I pull him back before he can. In reality, I know that Draco can come up whether I let him in or not. He is a wizard, after all... but maybe it's a step in the right direction that he's asking instead of just using his magic, knowing I don't want to see him.

"Ginny." I can hear the sigh in his voice. "Please, will you let me come up?"

I can just imagine him leaning his arm against the building, his other hand clenched into a tight fist.

I stare at the intercom for a moment and then I look at Ethan.

"No," I answer before taking my finger off the button and going into my bedroom.

I lock the door and set Ethan down on the bed so I can start pacing back and forth with my wand... just waiting for him to break down my wards and come storming in...

When he doesn't show... I look back at the baby with my hands on my hips. He starts to get fussy and I look at the time. Of course, it's way past his nap time and he's not happy about it. I snuggle up beside him, running my fingers up and down his stomach as he stretches out against the mattress. I send sly looks to the door as I pull Ethan close and eventually he falls asleep. I watch the door until sleep finds me as well and we take a nice little nap together.

I wake before he does and spend a few moments just looking at him before pulling myself to my feet. I go into the bathroom and get three hidden vials behind my medication before I sit at the kitchen table, filling out the forms I had picked up the week before and securing the vials inside the padded envelope. I put the papers inside with my check and seal it closed, propping it up against the wall so I'll remember to put it out with the post the next time I leave.

I fix myself a sandwich and do some busy work around the house before deciding to call Judith. Her voice sounds soft and still groggy...and that guilt thing comes back to me. I tell her she doesn't have to come tomorrow... I tell her she can have the day off and I hang up before she can answer because I can hear Ethan start to wake.

"Hey, baby," I whisper when I go into the bedroom and find him kicking. I go over and pick him up, holding him close and inhaling that scent of him that I find so intoxicating. "Did you have a good nap?"

I give him his pacifier and we spend the rest of the day together, just lounging about and watching television. I let him sleep with me during the night and we wake early in the morning to eat breakfast. I like our routines... I like that we have a schedule. My psychiatrist says that it helps with my post traumatic stress... Having order in my life that's completely under my control is empowering in a way I've never known...

"Do you want to go for a walk?" I ask after cleaning off the banana from his face.

I pretend he says yes and I bundle him up for the cold weather before grabbing the envelope on the table and stuffing it in my bag. I put him in the stroller and lock the door behind me as we walk towards the lift. I hesitate at the front door, looking out of one of the side windows to make sure Draco's isn't waiting before I leave the building. I keep looking over my shoulder, just waiting for him to pop out from behind a tree as I make my way to the mail boxes across the street.

Ethan makes a noise as I take the envelope from my bag and I look down at him. Does knowing this really matter? Will it change anything? The way I feel or the way I act? I don't think so...I smile at the baby and reach out to take his hand, letting him grip a couple of my fingers. He smiles at me... and I start to put the envelope back in my bag... but at the very last second... I push it through the outgoing mail slot and walk away with Ethan looking curiously up at me as I scurry down the sidewalk.

There's a park nearby, where children play and suburban mothers gather to talk about how rough life is with a husband, two kids, and a mortgage. Their first world problems are a little hard to stomach some days, so I normally keep to myself. I know their thoughts, though. They think I'm too young to have a baby. They think I lied when I told them I was twenty three... and they think I'm strange. The funny thing is, they're mostly right about everything.

Not many people are out, but a few kids are running around and playing on the equipment at the heart of the park. A man is reading a new paper on one of the benches and there's an elderly lady smoking a cigarette by the trash cans. We circle the park a couple times before Ethan falls asleep and I start steering us towards the flat so I can put him in his crib and maybe get some writing done...but I stop when we pass the man with the newspaper. I can't see his face, but his oxford shoes are familiar to me and I hesitate a second before pushing the stroller his way.

"What are you doing here?" I ask when I'm standing right in front of him.

"Reading the paper," he answers and I clench my fist.

"You're in a muggle neighborhood. No one reads newspapers anymore."

"I find that unlikely."

I grab the paper and bunch it up. "Its' all on the internet, Zabini. No muggle under thirty five gets their information from paper based sources...and, by the way, only pedophiles hang out in parks when they don't have any children."

He smiles at me and cross his legs, tilting his hat back.

"And your hat is stupid," I add for good measure because fedoras are pretentious.

I throw the paper in the trash bin and start pushing the stroller away from Zabini... but he jogs to catch up with me.

"That's no way to greet an old friend," he says, walking beside me with his hands in his pockets. "Everyone was wondering why you didn't come back to school. Little do they know you've found yourself a little muggle nest."

"I don't know how you and Draco found me but-"

"Malfoy's been here?" He seems surprised and he raises his eyebrows. "Good old, Draco. Always beating me to the punch..."

I stop with one hand on the stroller and one on my hip. "I'm serious. What do you want?"

He stops smiling. "I just wanted to see you..." His golden eyes trail down to the Ethan still fast asleep. "And baby," he adds with a smirk. He reaches out to touch the baby's cheek, but I push his hand away. "I never got to hold him," he admits with a sigh. "You left before I got a chance to see him."

"Why would you want to?" I ask sharply, giving him a sour look.

"Why wouldn't I?" he asks, tilting his head and smiling. I don't say anything and he looks me over. "Well?" he asks. "Are you going to invite me over for tea or what? Come on," he says, trying to charm me. "We can talk like old friends and I can fill you in on what's been happening back at home."

I hesitate a second before looking him in the eyes. "Only for a little while," I tell him and he smiles in victory before following me back to the apartment complex.

"This is awfully homey," he says when I unlock the front door. "Not where I pictured you."

"Where do you picture me?" I ask tiredly as I put my keys away.

"In some large decrepit mansion surrounded by servants," he says. "Wearing expensive robes and silk nighties."

I make a face. "Then you don't know me at all."

"I know you better than you'd like."

I make another face and send him a glare. "Really, how did you find me?" I repeat my earlier question and he shrugs.

"It's hard to stay hidden, Ginny. Especially from people like me."

We walk towards the lift, but Blaise stops and stares at the door under the stairs. "Where does that lead to?" he asks curiously.

"The basement," I answer, pushing him into the lift and blocking the door with my stroller.

He presses the button to my floor before I tell him to and I give him a suspicious look.

"I told you," he tells me, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed. "It's hard to stay hidden."

"You don't break in and watch me sleep, do you?" I half joke, sending him a sideways glare.

"Of course not. Only creeps do that... and maybe the wards you put around your door are a little too strong for me to break."

Now it's my turn to smirk.

"Look," he says, peaking his head over the stroller. "The little one is awake."

Ethan is gazing up at us now, sucking on his pacifier and looking adorable with rosy cheeks and eyes still puffy from sleep.

"He's quite handsome for a baby," Blaise adds and I roll my eyes, tucking the cover a little tighter around his body. "Ethan," he says the name slowly like he was tasting it for the first time. "I'm not sure how I feel about that name. It's very plain for someone of his lineage."

"Stop talking," I sigh and he laughs.

When we get to my floor, I take out my keys and wand. "I'm putting them back up after you leave," I warn him as I remove the wards. "So don't get any ideas."

"What kind of ideas?" he taunts as I unlock the door and push the stroller inside.

I ignore him and take Ethan from his stroller, holding him against my hip as I walk into the living room. Blaise looks around with his hands on his hips, appraising everything he sees. "What a nice little place you've got. Putting Malfoy money to work, are we?"

"If I was putting Draco's money to work, I would be renting out every room in this building."

Zabini snorts in laughter, like my joke had actually tickled him and he throws himself on one of my couches, putting his dirtied up boots on the coffee table. I glare when I see it, but I don't say anything as I go into the kitchen to make a bottle for Ethan. I hold him to the side as I reach in the cabinet for a clean bottle.

"I can hold him while you do that." I jump when I hear Zabini's voice so close me. "This seems like a two handed operation."

I hesitate a second before nodding my head.

"Sit down," tell him, ushering him to the dining room table that's just outside of the kitchen area. "Stay where I can see you," I warn him as I push him down into a chair. "And don't shake him..."

"I'm not an imbecile," he snaps, giving me a hard look as I cradle Ethan's head. "I'm pretty much aware that it's bad to shake a baby. Thank you for the vote of confidence."

I pause another second before slowly lowering the baby into Zabini's arms. "Be careful with him," I whisper, not wanting to offend him, but genuinely worried.

"I will," he says, amused.

I don't move for a while as he sets him against his chest and when he gives me a look, I finally step away and go back into the kitchen. I make a bottle for Ethan and hand that off to Blaise before starting with the tea. I try not to use magic... but it's hard... so I end up taking out my wand and using a quick spell.

"How is school going?" I ask because the silence is getting weird and I look over my shoulder to see Blaise turning Ethan so they're facing one another.

"Fine," he says as he rests the baby against his lap where his ankle is resting on his knee. "Most of the professors died during the war, and the new people they brought in are awful. They might as well just throw a book at us and send us on our way."

I smile at the thought.

"What about you? Are you ever going back?"

"I might," I say with a shrug. When the tea is ready, I pour some into two cups. "I haven't decided when."

"What color is his hair?" he ponders and I look over to see him brush his fingers across Ethan's head. "It looks... brownish... maybe a little red?"

"It's auburn," I tell him flatly.

"Much darker than yours," he points out, smiling down at Ethan. "You know, in ancient Greece they thought that redheads turned into vampires after death."

"Is that what you're learning at Hogwarts now?" I ask and he smiles at my joke.

"In any case, he's not really a ginger," he says, going back to running his hands through Ethan's hair. "It might even get as dark as mine once he grows a little."

"I doubt that," I counter, placing the cup beside him. "Your hair is black."

"So?"

I make a face and take a seat at the table. "His hair might get lighter... or even redder... but I doubt it would ever turn black," I say as I think of Tom and his perfectly combed black hair...It gives me the chills...

Harry has black hair too, so maybe it's not so awful... I look at Blaise... So does Zabini...but Draco... Draco definitely does not have black hair...

"So, what do you think?" he asks after a moment of silence as I take a sip from my tea cup.

"What do I think about what?"

"About being a mommy?" he asks, sending me a smile as he holds Ethan up. "Was it everything you thought it would be?"

"I don't know," I admit softly, staring down at my hands as he turns toward the table. "You were right though... I love him very much."

"I'm usually right about most things."

"How's Pansy?" I ask, taking another sip from the cup. "I wrote her a letter a couple months ago, but I never heard back."

"Oh, she's shacked up with some bloke she met. They're madly in love, of course. I know she's just trying to make me jealous."

"Is she?" I ask, giving him a hard eyed look. "Not everything is about you," I point out and he laughs.

"I know that, but in this instance, it is all about me...and it always will be with her."

"She deserves to be with someone who treats her well."

"Does she?" he asks, raising a dark eye brow. "She's a huge bitch, Gin. Even _you_ know that."

"Yeah, well..." I can't come up with a good retort, so I change the subject. "How's your mother doing?"

He snorts and doesn't even bother answering. "You know Draco and I are getting medals on Friday. The minister himself is going to be handing them out."

"Medals for what?" I ask, tilting my head to make sure Ethan is alright. He's cradled against Blaise's chest now, drinking his bottle and looking perfectly at home.

"You really haven't been reading the paper here, have you?"

I shake my head.

"For bravery... Being war heroes or something like that... Draco gets a special mention because he was tortured for a while..." He trails off and sighs. "I probably should have let myself get tortured," he says thoughtfully. "Oh, well," he shrugs his shoulders and looks at me. "Too late for that."

"Draco was tortured?" I whisper.

A part of me assumed that, but another part refused to acknowledge it. We didn't talk about it... We didn't talk about anything after the last battle.

"You haven't bedded him in a while," he says and I blush. "You haven't seen the scars he has to add to that fish hook on his back."

I don't say anything for a while as I run my fingers along the grooves in the table, trying to imagine how awful it must look.

"He's already been accepted into The Academy, you know," Blaise says and when I snap my eyes to his, he nods. "Draco. They basically asked him to attend after he graduates. Then he'll be on that linear path to power he's been dreaming about since we were small."

"And you?" I ask, tilting my chin up because I know what Draco's plan holds for him.

"I'll be right along with him," he says with a smile. "Waiting to pull out the rug."

I make a face at that and he laughs.

"Of course, that was a joke," he says, standing up to hand the baby off. "I would never dream of double crossing Draco Malfoy."

"Why not?" I ask, holding Ethan close and letting him grab my hair. "Is there a reason why you do everything he says? It's kind of pathetic," I say, wanting to hurt him.

Blaise doesn't say anything for a few moments, and then he nods his head. "I've owed his family a blood debt for a very long time," he admits, pulling out a cigarette from his pocket. "But it's worked to my advantage so far and soon that blood debt will be broken."

I want to press him more, but he starts walking towards the door.

"I was born a bastard child to a broke soulless bitch," he says and I cringe, covering Ehtan's ears like it could shield him from the hateful words. Zabini lights his cigarette with his wand, blowing smoke from the corner of his mouth. "I shouldn't be alive, but I am, and things just keep getting better for me."

"Are you leaving?" I ask as I stand up.

He smirks. "Sad to see me go?" he asks before checking his watch. "I have somewhere I need to be," he says. "Thank you for letting me in. I would ward this door," he says, tapping the frame as he opens it up. "If I found you, it means others will too."

"Yeah..." I trail off, nodding my head as he stands in the doorway.

"I'll see you around," he says. I turn Ethan away from the smoke as he blows it out into the hallway. "It was good seeing you."

With that he leaves, and I lock the door behind him... using my wand to put up the wards once more. I sit down heavily on a dining room chair and I look down at Ethan.

"Your hair will not turn black," I whisper, pressing a kiss to his forehead. "You're a Weasley child."

I hope it never gets darker... because I fear he really would look like Tom...

* * *

Two weeks pass before I hear from anyone else from my past but when I do... it's in a muggle grocery store, of all places. I thought I saw her when I was in the canned good isle, but I shook it off because there was no way in hell Ruth Davenport would be anywhere near a grocery store, let alone in a muggle one. She is hard to miss, though, with her chic clothes and good looks... so when I caught a glimpse of her in the meat section, wearing skin tight leather pants and a see through blouse... I decided it was time to go home. I stuffed my list in my pocket and told Ethan to hold on as I started to speed walk towards the cash wrap.

"Ginny!" She catches up to me in the bread isle, but I ignore her. "Ginny, hold on, dear."

I can hear the taps of her high heeled shoes getting closer, and I turn quickly... heading towards the bakery. The tricky witch goes around a table and cuts me off with her long nailed fingers gripping the end of my cart and blocking my exit.

"There you are," she smiles and I send reluctant eyes her way. "You've cut your lovely hair," she points out, slightly breathless from chasing me as she walks around my cart to get closer. "How lovely," she says in that same fake flattering voice that's actually very insulting.

"Yeah," I say, looking down to Ethan as he takes off his hat, showing off his brownish red hair under bright fluorescent lights. "What do you want?"

"I don't _want_ anything," she says, looking down at the baby and letting her smile fade. "I just thought it would be nice to see how you were doing. Everyone is worried about you, you know," she says, giving me a fake pout. I take Ethan's hat away so he doesn't drop it and I stuff it in my bag. "Narcissa is close to having a stroke if you don't return."

"Too bad for her," I say, gripping my shopping cart.

She laughs, it's a bell like laugh, and she gets sideways looks from the men nearby. That's what you get for wearing a plunging neckline to a grocery store. Ethan makes a noise and she looks at him, letting that smile fade again as she sizes him up and down.

"I told you, Ginevra," she says lowly. "You should never have a child you don't want."

I give her a nasty look and grab Ethan's hand, squeezing it because he's so soft. "I want him," I tell her, moving my cart and wanting her to leave me alone. "I love my son."

"Of course," she smiles at me, pearly white teeth against red lipstick. "Children born from rape are always a welcome addition to any family."

I stop and look at her, my face paling and something sharp clawing at my heart.

"He is Draco's son," I say in a low voice, looking around so others won't hear. "How dare you say that to me."

"Right," she smiles again. "You and I are more alike than you know," she says seriously, pulling something from her purse. "I know that my son came to visit you," she says as she hands me a card that has an address on it. "I love my boy as much as you love yours, I'm sure... but I will give you a little bit of advice. Blaise is a liar. He always has been. A trait he picked up from his father, I'm afraid."

"And who would that be?" I ask, wanting to hurt her... or embarrass her, at least... but it doesn't faze her. She just smiles some more.

"If you feel like you need something," she says, nodding to the card she gave me. "This witch is excellent at potions. Don't wait too long like I did...don't wait until they can fight back. I should have ended it eighteen years ago."

"What are you talking about?" I ask as she spares Ethan another look.

"He will be handsome like my boy is handsome... and I'm sure just as awful."

I clench my jaw and start walking again, but she follows.

"I never wanted to have him. I wanted an abortion but the Malfoy's convinced me otherwise. They locked me up until I had the baby and then married me off to Carmine."

"I'm sure that was rough," I say flatly, pushing my cart down the isle.

"I didn't kill my first husband," she says, making me stop and turn around again. "I know that's a generally held belief, but Carmine Zabini was nice to me. I was only twenty four when I had Blaise... I was scared... but I didn't poison Carmine."

"Okay?" I say with a brow raised and she licks her bottom lip.

"Carmine took Blaise for a walk in the garden one day when he was little. They never came back and when I went to look for them, I found them in the stables. Carmine was dead and Blaise was sitting beside him, playing with a toy like nothing had happened. The way he looked at me... I knew I could never prove it, but it was Blaise. I love my son," she says like she was trying to convince herself of it. "I do, but I would never trust him... I would never let him have the upper hand knowing what he can do. The Malfoy's are awful people... I'm an awful person... but Blaise is the worst."

I open my mouth to reply but I stop myself because it's just absurd.

"You're mad," I tell her, breaking away and shaking my head.

"Maybe," she whispers. "But at least I'm not you."

With that she leaves... with every man's eye on her as she sashays out of the store. When she's finally gone, I look down at Ethan and kiss his head, crunching up the card in my right hand.

"We're going to have to move," I tell him, trying not to read in too much to the words spoken to me by a woman I never particularly liked. I tilt my face down until we're looking at one another and I give him a little smile. "I love you," I tell him, just in case... just in case he understood what that awful woman was saying. "I will always love you. I never want you to doubt that," I whisper, leaning forward to kiss his cheek as I think of Blaise and how broken his relationship with his mother is.

I will never let that happen with my son.

Judith is at the apartment when I get home and I let her have Ethan as I put the grocery's away. I take out that crumpled up card and I give the address one last look before throwing it in the bin. There is nothing she said that made sense to me and I want nothing she has to offer. I watch some cartoons with Ethan and Judith before locking myself in the bedroom... going to town on my typewriter and putting the finished pages in the large stack I keep in one of the drawers.

When intercom buzzes, I stop typing.

"I'll get it," I call when I hear Judith get up. I unlock the door and run down the hallway, beating Judith to the intercom and shooing her off when she gives me an affronted look. "Who is it?" I ask after pressing the button.

God help me if it's Ruth Davenport.

"Can I come up?"

It's Draco again and I hesitate with my answer. It would seem very unfair to not let him up now after I've already let Zabini in...That makes me think of Ruth Davenport and I shake my head to rid it of that weird conversation.

I can picture Draco down there... and I think of the scars Zabini mentioned...

"Are you alone?"

"Of course I'm fucking alone, Ginny," he snaps, sounding very much like the Draco I know so well.

It's almost comforting, actually. What a jerk he is.

I take my finger off the button and I peek my head into living room. "Judith?" I call and she lifts her head. "Can you take Ethan for a walk in the park?"

"Uh... yeah, sure," she says as she stands up with Ethan against her hip.

The buzzer starts going off again, so I go into the hallway and press the button. "Just hold on a minute," I say and I hear him cuss as I run back into the front room where Judith is getting the baby bundled up to go outside.

"Will you take the back way out?" I ask as I grab his shoes and push them on his feet while she zips up his coat. "And keep your phone on you. I'll call you when... when you guys should come back."

"Come back?" she asks, giving me a look. "Who's that guy on the intercom?"

"It's just... it's someone..."

"Is it his father?" she whispers like it was a scandal. I grab a hat for Ethan and pull out the stroller from the closet.

"Yes," I admit, grabbing the baby bag and throwing random things in it.

"Oh," she seems surprised and she blinks a few times. "Well, okay then... Are you sure you want to bring him up?" she asks softly.

Judith doesn't know anything about Draco... but she suspects I must come from an abusive relationship based on how I act. _Whatever that means._..

"I know what I'm doing," I tell her, handing off the bag and grabbing Ethan so I can put him in his stroller. "Just keep your phone on."

"Okay," she nods her head as I strap the baby in. "I'll take him to McDonald's," she says, going into the kitchen and grabbing some baby food from the pantry. "We'll have lunch there."

The buzzer starts going off again and I open the door to usher them out.

"Remember, the back way."

She nods and I kiss Ethan quickly before watching them walk to the lift. Once they're gone, I run back to the intercom that's buzzing impatiently.

"If you don't want me to come up, just tell me leave," he snaps angrily.

"You can come up," I say quickly before pressing the button to let him in.

I take the wards off the door and then I sit at the kitchen table, waiting for him to come up with a nervous feeling tilting my stomach. When a knock comes at the door, I feel my heart start pounding, so I gingerly get up and unlock it... opening it just barely so I can see...He's standing there in a pompous wizards cloak, decked out in a green sweater and black slacks so perfectly pressed.

"Are you going to let me in?" he asks, raising his brows.

I step aside and make a motion for him to come in. He looks around the room as he unclasps his cloak and I shut the door behind him.

"You know this is a muggle neighborhood," I point out as I take his black winter cloak to hang in the closet.

"So?"

"You can't just wear your cloak around like it's normal."

"It's normal to me," he says, giving me another steel eyed look that clenches my heart.

"Well, only weird-o's wear cloaks in the muggle world," I say sourly and he looks around with his arms crossed.

"Where is he?"

"Who?" I ask, knowing full well who and when he gives me another glare, I swallow. "He's with the babysitter."

"I've been very patient with you, Gin," he says, running a hand over his face. "I have given you all the space in the world like you requested, but you can't keep me away from my son. It's not fair. I'm missing out on too much and I've reached my limit. One weekend a month isn't cutting it."

"I know it's not fair," I say softly because it's true. "I didn't know what else to do..."

"Of course my mother thinks I should just take you to court. How plebeian would that be?" I don't say anything and he glances at me... When he turns his neck I can see... I can see a scar peaking out just above the collar of his sweater. "You do realize I would win, right? If that came to pass. I would be granted full custody. I'm rich and well connected and I didn't fucking kidnap him for five fucking months."

"I'm his mother, Draco," I tell him, trying not to get angry with him because I understand why he's upset. "I didn't kidnap him-"

"Yes, you did," he snaps, cutting me off before I can finish. "That's what you would call it if I took him from you. I'm supposed to be his father, remember?"

"I remember," I say flatly because I can't think of anything else to say.

A silence falls between us and he rubs his forehead before letting his hand drop and looking around my flat with a brow raised. "Why did you not stay in the house I bought you?"

I think of of the beautiful home Draco gave me when I told him I wanted a break... When I told him I had to get away and not see him for a while...When I gave back his mother's ring and the bracelet...and the key to his fortune...When I broke up with him.

"Because you bought it," I admit.

"Did I not buy this?" he asks, looking around with a sneer. I don't respond and he nods. "That's what I thought." He walks towards the living room and I follow him, staring at his back and following the line of his spine. Draco's always had such a nice shape. He's still tall and slender... but he's starting to fill out more... He's turning into a man and I wonder if I look more like a woman.

He notices the television first and makes a face before sitting down on one of the chairs and rubbing his face. I carefully take a seat on the couch and put my hands together.

"What do you want?"

"Want?" I ask, raising a brow when he finally looks at me. He leans forward with his elbows on his knees.

"What do you want?" he asks again with his silver eyes narrowed. "To end all of this nonsense," he adds, sending a nasty look to the television like it had personally offended him. "I have given you more than enough time to sort it all out and I'm becoming impatient."

"This is not nonsense," I tell him softly. "My feelings do not run on your schedule and your time isn't more valuable than mine."

"I didn't say it was," he replies sharply. He stands up quickly and starts pacing. "I feel like I'm going mad. What do you want to make this right?"

"Why don't you just erase my memories to get what you want?" I counter flatly and he cringes like I had stabbed him with a sharp knife.

_If only I had a knife right now..._.

"I've already talked to you about that," he says heatedly. "I told you why I did it and you forgave me."

"Don't I always?" I sigh tiredly as I think of my support group. All those women who fall into the same patterns even when they did find a half way decent guy... "I don't want anything," I admit.

"Not even me?" he asks, his voice betraying his true emotions.

I hesitate a moment with my answer. He notices and clenches his fist, sitting down heavily and rubbing the emotion out of his eyes.

"I'm sorry. Is that what you want? I'm sorry for everything. The truth is I'm an awful person and hardly worth knowing."

I don't say anything, I just stare at him.

"Does that satisfy you?"

"It doesn't," I answer quickly. "That is a worthless apology."

He's getting angry... His cheeks are starting to color and his jaw is clenched in an angry line. "I can understand you wanting to get away...I can get you wanting to be alone for a while... What I can't understand is how you can stand to be away from me for so long. Whatever our differences... I thought you loved me. Is that not true anymore?"

The way he looks... it's making my heart hurt so I turn away from him. "You're an emotional blackmailer," I whisper as I think of words Kristi has said.

He hears it.

"And you're not?" he counters, giving me a hard eyed glare.

"Not like you," I answer and he clenches his fist before looking away and sighing loudly.

"I did not mean to get so angry," he admits to himself.

Another long silence falls between us and when he finally looks again at me, he's not half as angry as before. He stands up and walks towards me, kneeling when he gets close enough and running his knuckles down my cheek... It takes all that I have not to push him away.

"My emotions are getting the better of me," he says gently, putting his left hand on my thigh. "I don't mean to be so defensive. I just..." He pauses for a second. "I just miss you," he says, like it was hard for him to admit. "I love you so much."

He tilts his head as he studies my face and I can see that scar again. It's red and jagged around the edges. I wonder how far down it goes... I reach a tentative hand out to his collar and I carefully pull it down. I can see more marks across his chest and I lean forward, putting my left hand on his neck and running it through his hair so I can see down his back.

"They used a cursed blade," he admits softly, turning his face into my neck and inhaling. "They won't heal completely, but they will get lighter over time," he says, putting his hands on either side of me and caging me against the couch. We're pressed against one another now and I can feel each breath he takes. "The healer said they'll hardly be noticeable in a few years."

"I'm sorry," I tell him, letting go of his collar. When I realize what he's wearing and why it has no tags, my heart clenches a bit tighter and I pull back to look into his eyes. "My mother made this," I whisper, reaching out to tug on the fabric. "I can recognize her work anywhere."

"It's the only one she's given me that wasn't completely ridiculous," he admits and I feel the corner of my mouth turn up in a smile.

"Did she make you one with a dragon on it?" I ask, a full smile starting to break out on my face when I picture Draco opening that present.

"She made me two," he replies with a smirk and I actually laugh. "Trust me, they were just as awful as they sound."

"I can imagine," I say with a laugh and then I reach out to place a hand on his shoulder. "It was a nice touch wearing it here," I admit because Draco has always figured out ways to endear himself to me.

"I thought you'd like it," he whispers and then he leans forward, pressing a gentle kiss to my lips before I can even think...I let him, pulling him closer with my arms locked around his neck.

I let myself sink into the kiss... feeling the girl in me sigh to be kissed by someone I love so much...I even let him deepen it, opening my mouth and pressing against him tightly when he tilts his head and grabs my hair.

But then I remember myself... so I carefully pull back even when he tries to stop me.

I have a million thoughts running through my mind right now... but one sticks out and I can't hold my question back.

"Did you know that the information about Harry's aunt was a set up?"

"What?" he asks, setting back on his heels.

"Did you know it was a trap?"

He furrows his brows and lets his hands drop to his sides. "How could I have possibly known that?"

"It happened," I say softly, staring at his throat. "I find it hard to believe you didn't know."

He looks offended and he stands up. "If I knew it was a trap, why in the world would I go along with it?" he asks. He's getting furious now and his cheeks darken again. "In what way would that benefit me?"

I look away and think of Zabini. He's a liar... a million people have told me that... but his lies always seem so plausible. "Because you wanted Harry out of the way."

"Out of the way?" he asks, looking at me like he had never seen me before. "Why would you fucking think that? Harry Potter is no threat to me. Where is this coming from?"

Where was this coming from? I didn't dare admit and I shake it off._ Blaise is the worst..._

"I found the burrow password. In your room at Yellow Springs. You were so sure you gave it back. You lied to me."

"I did not lie," he says in frustration and he walks away... towards the window that rests against the back wall. "I honestly thought that I lost it."

"Really?" I ask with an eyebrow up. I stand to face him full on when he turns towards me. "You didn't give it to the Death Eaters? You didn't want them out of the way to keep me isolated?"

He gives me an awful look. "If I gave it to the Death Eaters, why in the hell would you find it randomly in my bedroom? Where did you find it?" he asks and I hesitate with my answer. That seems to prove something to him. "You're confusing a legitimate mistake with something sinister."

"Isn't that what I should expect from you? How many times have you swiped my memories? I know you're good at doing that. You said it was only that one time, but I think that's a lie too."

He doesn't say anything.

"I know what you are, Draco. I know what you've done to me and my friends... Luna..." I clench my fists when I think of her. "You made Theodore Nott date her so I wouldn't have anyone but you. He was awful... he treated her horribly and now she's dead!"

"And that's my fault?" he asks in anger. "I had nothing to do with her dying and if she didn't want to date Theo... she didn't have to. It's not my fucking fault he didn't treat her well." He hits his hand against the wall and then he shakes his head. "I have trust issues," he says sharply, turning to me. "I know that. I recognize that. I have problems trusting your fidelity and your love because everything I've grown up around has taught me otherwise... but you have them too. You have never trusted my intentions."

"Should I?" I ask, staring at his profile. "What have you ever done to prove to me I could trust you completely? You have so many plans and ambitions... You may say you love me... but it's awfully convenient for you."

"You are such a bitch sometimes. I've already apologized to you and now you're purposely trying to bait me into a fight."

Anger bubbles in my chest and my muscles tense.

"I'm not trying to start a fight... Me questioning you on questionable things does not make me a bitch," I tell him heatedly... I can feel my own face getting red as Draco pulls on his hair, making it stick up. "I'm well aware that me not forgiving you every horrible thing doesn't fit into your perfectly constructed life, but I can't just accept your apology and go back to the way things were. Nothing is ever going to be the same again... I'm not the same... and I hope you aren't either after all you've been through. It would be silly to think otherwise and it would be silly of me to go any further just accepting whatever you say because you're the one that said it."

He clenches his wand hand. "I didn't come here to fight you. I want access to my son. I'm proposing joint custody, but if you won't give me that... I will pursue it the legal way."

The thought terrifies me, but I won't show my fear.

"I don't want it to be this way," he admits, his voice much gentler as he looks at me. "It would be best for everyone if we were a proper family. I can support both of you. You can finish school... go to university. Everything will be much easier with me."

"I don't want Ethan to grow up in the same world you did... with all the lying and backstabbing. Kill before you get killed is no way to live and I won't subject him to that... or myself, for that matter. I don't want your money, so you can take it... and I don't need your love, either. I can survive without it. I've been doing pretty well on my own so far. You do _not_ define me."

He's silent for a long time and eyes start to get glassy, so he turns away.

"I feel like your love is so thin," he almost laughs, but it's a sad laugh because he's very close to crying... if he'd never allow himself the weakness. "It tears so easily. You've always been looking for a reason not to love me... to find out why I was never good enough for you."

"You've got that wrong. For the past year and a half I have been looking _desperately_ for reasons to keep loving you. To justify to myself something that I know is wrong."

"Being in love with me is wrong to you?" he asks. His voice cracks and it makes my own eyes water to see him so hurt.

"I don't know," I tell him honestly. "You have never been honest with me... all your lies and truths mix together... I don't know what to think. I'm not sure if I even know you."

"You know me better than anyone," he says seriously. I don't respond so he looks away. "My love is awful," he says and it rings inside of my memory. "And it's completely ruined me."

"Me too," I tell him, crossing my arms. "I had a life before you. I played sports, I had friends... a good relationship with my family... I even had hobbies. I lost most of that by being with you."

That came across as very cruel, and I felt ashamed for saying it when he look so hurt... but he covered it quickly.

"You would have lost a lot more if I didn't love you so much," he says flatly, his expression blank and his eyes shining.

"I think you should leave now."

I go to open the front door, but Draco doesn't follow.

"My world has changed," he says. "Goals I once aspired to seem hardly worth having." He walks towards me and reaches into his pocket. "If I don't have you, I don't see how I could want anything else."

"I'm sure you'll manage," I say callously.

"I don't want to," he retorts. "Unlike you, my love does define me. In fact, it's changed everything about me."

He pulls something from his pocket and I flinch, thinking it's going to be his wand... but when I see a vial of blood... I tilt my head..

"What is this?" I ask.

"It's your blood," he tells me softly. He presses it into my hand. "I asked for it once and could never bring myself to use it... because it would be like using you and all those things you said really would be true."

I don't know what to say... or believe... so I don't say anything.

Draco stares me down for a few uncomfortable moments before speaking again.

"You're so beautiful," he whispers, bringing a hand up to my hair and looking thoughtful. "You're the first person I've ever truly wanted before."

I bring my hand up and grab his wrist so I can gently pull it away. "I'll let you see Ethan more," I tell him softly. "We can work something out... but I really think you should leave now."

"You want me to be honest?" he asks.

I don't say anything.

"I will be honest with you," he admits, stepping back and scratching his forehead. "I had a governess when I was growing up."

I look at him and blink. "What?"

"I had a governess," he repeats. "She was in charge of my primary education, but my grandfather took it upon himself to teach me the history of our people. Two days a week from the time I was five until I turned eleven, he would take me to sites and museums, schooling me on the pure-blooded families and the legends that built them. When I was eight he took me to Folk Hills and told me the history of the Black Hills and it's mythology...That was the first time I heard the story of Lancaster Malfoy and the curse he put on your family. The curse of the blood line that ignited the feud that lasted for generations. My Grandfather told me that the Weasley's were once a great and noble family that had housed many powerful and dark witches and wizards... In fact, Folk Hills was built upon the ruin of Blackstone Castle, your ancestral home."

He takes a seat at the dining room table and motions for me to do the same. I don't move. I just keep looking at him.

"But your family fell into ruin... and Blackstone fell into the hands of my family who let it rot into the ground out of spite. My Grandfather told me that a girl had finally been born into your house after two centuries of weak hearted boys. A girl named Ginevra who was just a year younger than me. He told me that this girl was a curse breaking witch and a curse breaking witch was more powerful than any wizard ever could be. He told me that because of that ancient bond so many years ago, I had a claim to that girl . He told me that a curse breaking witch is the kind of wife one would want in their corner and I would do well to keep an eye out for you as we grew older. That was the first time I heard your name."

I take a seat across from him with my brows furrowed at his admissions.

"I hardly cared about what he had to say. I was eight... I didn't even think about you again until I found out it was you who opened the Chamber of Secrets. After I found out it was my father who gave you the diary, I asked him why. He told me that he didn't realize what power the diary had possessed. It was given to him by the Dark Lord not long before his death and was told to keep it hidden. My father kept it tucked between a million other books in our library and forgot about it over time. After the Lord Voldemort was 'killed' by Harry Potter, rumors started to go around about a book the Dark Lord used to carry around. The Book of the Corrupt, they called it. They said it made the person who had it go mad and do wicked things to themselves and the ones they loved."

"That was the diary?"

He nods. "My father isn't much for rumors, though, he ignored them. When I was four, my mother found the diary and started writing in it. She was pregnant at the time... The book convinced her that I was a monster and that the baby inside of her was one too. She used a curse to kill the baby and then turned her wand on me... My father caught her before she could curse me... but not in time to save the sister who was eight months grown inside of her. My father buried the book in the garden and my parents swore never to speak of it again. They claim she had a miscarriage "

I make a face when I remember Narcissa Malfoy... how she claimed they never had any children after Draco because he was so perfect.

"In my second year of Hogwarts, the ministry was doing raids on houses that had sided with the Dark Lord during the first war. Your father was in charge of finding dark artifacts and had planned a thorough search of Malfoy Manor. My father knew he had to get rid of that book, and he planned on selling it in Knockturn ally... but an opportunity arose when we saw your family that day. He said it was to get back at your father for leading the raids... He said that he thought your family could use a little darkness in their lives."

I make a face as I remember my first year of Hogwarts and the dark shadow that looms over all my memories.

"I remember him saying that perhaps the book found it's proper home... If you were able to open the Chamber of Secrets with the help of a memory, what else could you do?"

He puts his hand on the table and starts tapping his fingers against the wood. _Tap. Tap. Tap... _

"When the Dark Lord was resurrected, it was in a muggle graveyard... and Peter Pettigrew said he needed three ingredients. The blood of the enemy, the sacrifice of the servant, and the bone of the father. The bone was taken from a muggle grave." His lip curls back like the very idea of having a muggle around, even a dead one, was distasteful. "The Dark Lord used the money of pureblooded families. He preached to them about their superiority and he tormented them with his power... but he was no pureblood. He was the son of a filthy muggle and dared to tell purebloods what to do."

He pauses for a second when the anger gets to him.

"The night that he tortured my father for losing his diary was the night I made the decision to bring him down. I decided that I would not follow a cruel wizard with dirty blood and neither should anyone else. I heard whispers of your name as soon as he came back... The Dark Lord remembered you. Just barely, but enough to be interested. My father said he held himself up in the Lestrange library, tracing your lineage and reading accounts of your ancestors. He appeared two weeks later and said that he would have you because fate had willed it to be so. He said you were bonded through soul magic and that soon you would be bonded to him by so much more. I didn't know what he meant by soul magic... I didn't realize until I found out about his Horcruxes."

I swallow and look at my lap, gently scratching my fingers over my jeans.

"He was going to take you then... but my father and grandfather offered a different alternative. They convinced him to let you finish your schooling. The Dark Lord was waiting to make himself known until after the school year started anyways. That way he could control the student body and hold certain children hostage once the war broke out. My grandfather told him that it would be easy to control you if you believed in his creed... He said you were young enough to be convinced. So the Dark Lord asked me to try to show you light, as it were."

I knew this, but it still kind of hurt.

"I had already come up with most of my plan to bring about Lord Voldemort's down fall. Once I understood that it was your blood that would bring him to full power, I knew it would be a good idea to get close to you. Zabini told me that you worked at Folk Hills. He said that you were good looking," he says, flicking me a glance. "That made me wanting to be close to you more believable... "

"You starting dating me for that," I say.

"I liked you, Ginny," he admits. "You were pretty and I actually liked you. With what I wanted to do... I didn't have to be your boyfriend for that."

"What did you want to do?" I ask gently.

"My plan was to take out his inner circle first," he admits. "One by one I would take them out while Potter took out the Dark Lord's Horcruxes... but there was one that was bonded with you. I knew that with that, as well as the blood that brought him to power... I thought that to kill the dark lord..." he pauses for a second. "I would have to kill you too."

We make eye contact and I can't find it in me to say anything... because he wanted to kill me. He dated me, he kissed me...he told me he loved me... but he was going to kill me.

"The others knew?" I ask as I think of the look Ivy Parkinson gave me once at Hogwarts. Something that was a mixture between sympathy and pity.

"Some of them," he nods. It makes me think of Pansy and Daphne... how they pushed me in his direction knowing what he wanted to do. "I changed my mind," he admits. "I spent the better part of the year trying to figure out a way to separate your soul from his. I knew you couldn't survive without it. You're not a monster like he is."

"Why?"

"Why what?" he asks, avoiding my gaze as he looks at his hand.

"Why did you change your mind about killing me? You had me," I tell him with my brows raised. "You tricked me into a bonding without my consent and I would have done anything you wanted."

"I didn't want to," he says softly, tilting his chin down.

"Why?"

"Because I fell in love with you."

"So?"

"So?" he tilts his head at my response like I was being ridiculous. "Is that not explanation enough?"

"Not really," I admit, sitting back and crossing my legs. "When did you decide you weren't going to murder me?" I ask sharply.

"Ginny..."

"How long were we together... before you decided that?"

"It doesn't matter when."

"Yes it does," I tell him. "Because it means everything you said... every touch and kiss... was lie."

Where I was having girlish romantic thoughts at the start of our relationship, every move Draco made was a ploy to bring me closer so he could get rid of me.

"No, it wasn't," he says, getting up and walking around to my side of the table. He kneels beside me and takes my hands. "It kind of threw me off guard how trusting you were... Even though I was a Malfoy, you gave in rather easily. You were affectionate and you fell in love with me so quickly... I started second guessing myself from the start. How could I hurt you when I was developing real feelings for you? I love you," he says. "My first order of business wasn't killing the Dark Lord anymore. It was keeping you safe, protecting you... and I will spend the rest of my life loving you and trying to protect you. So you see how much my word has changed... That is the truth. The awful truth, but the truth none the less."

He leans in like he wants to kiss me, but I turn away at the last second.

"Then tell me another truth," I say, pulling my hands from his. "Why didn't you get me out of the Riddle House?"

He's silent for a moment before biting back. "I've explained this to you. The wards were impossible to break. Anyone who tried caught on fire..."

"Then why was Blaise able to bribe his house elf to give me Henry? Why wouldn't you just bribe that elf to get me out of there? Why wouldn't you let that happen?"

"What are you talking about?" he asks sharply, sitting back on his knees with his hand on the table.

"If you couldn't get me out of there by a house-elf, which I highly doubt, then why didn't you at least have it send me a note of some kind. I was there for months with no one and I thought I was going to die..."

"Wait," he snaps, shaking his head. "Blaise bribed an elf to give you his familiar? He couldn't have done that."

"Well, he did," I tell him sharply. "He's done more for me than you ever have."

He stands up with his hand clenched. "You never told me that. That you had the familiar in Riddle house."

"Yes, I did," I answer, not sure if that's the truth. "You know I had Henry at Shell cottage... How do you think I got him?"

Draco looks troubled for a moment. He furrows his brows and looks away before something dawns on his face. "House-elves can't just go in and out of any wards... They have to be approved."

"Faun was a Zabini elf. She looked after me in the house and Franklin, the elf that brought me Henry, he was the elf that cooked my meals. Why are you acting like this is news to you?"

"Because it is," he says darkly, sparing me a glance. "You should have told me that. If I would have know a way to get into that house, I would have saved you. I didn't know Zabini's elves were guarding you...I didn't know about his familiar." He takes out his wand and then he goes to the closet where I hung his cloak. "I'm going to come back later," he tells me as he clasps his cloak around his neck and he comes back to me, grabbing my face and kissing me hard. "If Blaise Zabini comes here, you don't let him in."

The look on my face must have given it away, because he clenches his jaw.

"He's been here before," he spits with his eyes narrowed. "He's not going to be here again," he says, his voice rough and taking that authoritative tone I'm so used to. "If he comes around, you do not let him in. Do you understand?"

Before I can answer, the phone rings and it makes Draco jump. Just the visual of Draco being so surprised by a muggle machine is pleasant enough to last me the rest of my life.

"What is that?" he snaps, offended by the noise as he grips his wand.

I give him a look and go into the kitchen where the phone is against the wall.

"Hello?"

I can hear Ethan crying in the background and Judith's voice sounds tired.

"Is it alright if we come back now?" she asks breathlessly. "I think Ethan is getting tired."

"Yes," I tell her, sparing a look to Draco as he glares me down. "Yes, come back. It's alright."

When I hang up the phone, Draco speaks. "I'm coming back," he says, nodding to the door. "Zabini does not come in here."

He leaves with a slam of the door and I sit at the kitchen table... staring at the wall and thinking of Blaise Zabini..._ The Malfoy's are awful people... I'm an awful person... but Blaise is the worst... Blaise lies... He's a liar... He's terrible..._

I don't move until Judith and Ethan come through the door fifteen minutes later. It shakes me from my thoughts and I blink a few times as the world comes back to focus.

"I don't think he's feeling well," Judith says as Ethan whines, not knowing anything about the revelations I just received.

"Let me see," I whisper in a dazed voice as I stand up and reach for him. I take off his hat, kissing away his tears and putting my palm on his forehead. "He doesn't feel too hot," I whisper and when he looks at me, he reaches out to grab my hair. "What's wrong, baby?"

He starts babbling, a precursor to words, and I smile, tugging off his shoes and walking us into the living room. It's easy to forget all my troubles when I'm with him.

"I grabbed your mail while we were out," she says, setting it beside me as I take off Ethan's jacket. "How did you talk with that guy go?" she asks. "I think we passed him on the way out. The blond fellow?"

"That was him. It was alright," I say flatly. Grabbing the mail and sorting through it.

"Was he wearing a cloak?" she asks curiously and I can hear the humor in her voice.

"Yes, he's weird," I tell her so she doesn't ask anymore questions.

"My brother wears a cloak sometimes. He's really into this Dungeons and Dragons game... Plays it all the time in my Mum's basement."

"You can have the rest of the day off," I tell her quickly when I see the orange envelop I've been waiting for. "Thank you." I give her a tight lipped smile, on the verge of crying because my emotions are running so high.

Why was Draco so surprised when I told him about Henry? Did that mean Zabini could have gotten me out but he didn't... and then he lied? _He's a liar... A very good liar... _

I wait for her to leave before I put Ethan in his play pen and then I sit down, staring at the envelope before tearing it open with a nervous flutter in my stomach.

"Whatever the outcome," I say out loud, looking at Ethan as he plays. "It will not change my feelings."

_I swear. _

I take out the results and furrow my brows as I read them... It doesn't make any sense... I don't understand... I stand up quickly and grab the phone, dialing the number at the top to the page and chewing my lower lip raw as I try to understand the graphs.

"Um... Hi...My name is Ginevra Weasley. I'm calling to ask about some test results I received."

"Okay, just give me one second and I'll connect you."

Another person picks up. I explain my concerns and I give him my name. "I'm just a little confused," I admit as I hold the two papers in front of me. "I'm not sure how I should read these."

"Well," I can hear him typing on a computer. "It looks like out of the two samples given to us, donor A is the father."

I clench my eyes shut and put my forehead against the wall.

"Thank God," I say in a relived whisper and the man is silent for a moment.

"It looks like donor B is closely related to the child as well," the man says, like the news would be pleasing to me. I stand straight to look at the paper with a confused tilt of my head... Of course, every pureblooded family is in some degree related to one another... "Judging by this, it looks like donor B is not the father, but the child's grandfather."

"What?" I whisper because donor B was the vial of blood I bought in Knockturn Ally... The blood that should have belonged to Tom Riddle.

"The grandfather. The Y chromosome..."

"But that's impossible," I say. "This could be wrong, right? Maybe a mix up? That happens, doesn't it? Donor A is the father," I say. "If Draco is the father... it's impossible what you're telling me."

"I'm sorry, ma'am. If you want to fill out the forms again, we can retake the test to be sure... but it looks like this is pretty clear."

I hang up the phone. I know it's rude, but I don't know what else to do. I lean my head against the wall for a few moments, clenching and unclenching my fists before going into the living room and picking Ethan up. He fusses for a moment, so I give him his pacifier and once he quiets down I grab the papers, looking them over with a brutal intensity before the itching in my chest starts to burn.

The witch lied to me... She gave me Lucius Malfoy's blood. She was fucking_ lying_...I start pacing back and forth... back and forth... and then I stop, looking down at Ethan... His eyes... his hair... his nose... his smile...

I storm out of the flat, slamming the door behind me and startling my baby as I walk towards the lift. The doors shut and I press the button, watching the digital numbers by the ceiling count down from five until they reach the basement. I don't move for a few moments... staring at the empty laundry room as Ethan grips my hair in his soft little fingers. I'm thankful no one is down here, because I feel like I might have done something I shouldn't have if I encountered a muggle right now.

Ethan tugs on my hair, so I look at him. His eyes look so curious and I press a soft kiss to his head before walking towards the supply closet and turning on the light. It's full of cleaning supplies and old brooms... A typical custodial unit if there ever was one...and I look behind me one last time before lifting my wand and whispering a spell.

A door appears against the empty back wall, shimmering against the darkness and making Ethan make a happy noise around his pacifier.

He loves magic so much and I'm not sure if that should worry me.

I push the door open to reveal the hidden room I constructed when I first moved in. There's nothing to it, really... just a large windowless room made out of dirt and stone. I lift my wand to light the hanging lamps and I press my lips to Ethan's temple while the lights roar to life. The door closes behind us and Ethan makes another happy noise as I hold him tighter. It's impossibly cold now and I lick my lips nervously as I let my eyes fall to the center of the room. There, right under one of the lamps, is the ghost of Tom Riddle, sitting in a circle of black ghost salt.

It took me two months to finally trap him.

"I was wondering when you were going to come and see me again." He smiles as he stands up, his Slytherin uniform looking as perfect as it did so many decades ago. "Leaving me here in the dark was a cruel twist, I'll admit. I quite admire how dark you're becoming."

I don't rise to his bait and I walk towards him with my wand white knuckled in my right hand.

"You seem so flustered," he muses, his dead dark eyes looking over my face with fake concern... Then he gives the baby in my arms a fond smile. "And you brought the boy..." He inhales slowly, like air was actually entering his lungs. "I bet his blood tastes like a sugar cane."

"You'll never know what his blood tastes like. You're dead."

He laughs at me and then something lights in his eyes... like he figured something out.

"You found something out that you didn't like." He smiles again, a wide handsome grin that chills my heart. "I see..." he smirks when Ethan tilts his head... and I do my best to pull his attention away. "Don't look so sour," he says, standing in the center of the circle with his hands clasped behind his back. "It's not my fault you didn't get the answer you wanted."

"I got my answer," I tell him sharply, covering Ethan's ears and trying to keep my emotions under control. "I can rest easy now because I know there is no way in hell you're his father."

"Is that so?" he asks, tilting his head like he was in on some great secret.

"Yes." I snap. "It was silly of me to think it was even a possibility. You weren't a true man anyways. You could never father a child."

I want to hurt him, but he just becomes more amused.

"Well, you must be down here for some reason. I suspect it's not to celebrate the news that Mr. Malfoy is the true father of that awfully Slytherin looking boy."

"He doesn't look like a Slytherin," I retort.

"No? Know many Slytherin's, do you? Well..." he smiles as he trails off. "I suppose you do."

I glare at him, feeling my blood boil and my hand shaking. I turn away when Ethan looks at me and I realize how rash I'm being. I shouldn't have come down here... I shouldn't have brought him... He never needed to see Tom... I should have better control of my emotions... I lick my lips and give Ethan an apologetic smile before heading towards exit... leaving Tom in the dark where he belongs.

"I always took what I wanted when I wanted it," he says. I stop, but refuse to turn around. "This might come as a surprise to you, my darling, but I fathered six children when I was in my original body... and I made sure to kill all of them before they had a chance to form." I feel cold, so I snuggle closer to Ethan. He puts his little hand on my neck and rests his head against my shoulder like he knew I needed the comfort. "One slipped past me, it seems," he says as I turn to look at him from the corner of my eyes. "He was hidden from me well. I didn't even know until the end."

I don't know what to say, so I don't say anything.

"I told you I had ways of ensuring my legacy, weeding out unwanted characteristics..." He tilts his face to see the baby and I turn again so Ethan can't see him. "It's very Dark magic, of course...Outlawed almost a century ago when it was first discovered. Magical eugenics is a ghastly business. Narcissa Malfoy proved herself quite skilled in the art. Most children die from those kind of potions, but_ he_ didn't. Draco Malfoy does, in fact, look like a Malfoy...and most of the things that would have made him like me had been wiped out. I couldn't even feel him like I had felt the others... But that boy," he says, nodding to me and the baby. "Is going to be mine."

I think of the potions I drank each day at Riddle Manor... and I shake it off quickly because what he's implying is ridiculous.

"You're lying," I tell him in disgust."I'm going to find out a way to get rid of you once and for all. When I'm done no one is even going to remember that you lived at all."

He laughs. "I doubt that," he says, his dead eyes sparkling. "Besides, why try to get rid of me before you have all the answers?" I don't say anything and he smirks. "There's a war coming, Ginny. It may be tomorrow or it may be in ten years... but it's coming and this time you're going to have to be prepared. You can't be a scared little farm girl this time around."

"You're lying," I repeat, my voice wavering.

"I rarely lie. That witch did give you my blood and now you know a truth."

I send him a look. How could he have even known about that?

"No, you're wrong. She gave me Lucius Malfoy's blood I won't let you do this to me."

"Do what?" he asks innocently.

"Confuse me... Try to mess up my mind."

"Oh, my dear girl. Your mind was already messed up before I came into the picture," he laughs at his own joke. "Narcissa was a crafty witch... She had Lucius formally adopt the boy so he would officially be a Malfoy under magical law and the elder Malfoy was none the wiser. Probably signed it without even asking what it was... Men are such idiots when girls are involved," he smirks at me, like I would know all about it. "Draco Malfoy probably doesn't even know it himself, but he will," he says. "The same person who found out and told me will probably tell him too. This person is a bitter child, you see, and he learned when he was young that he was the rightful heir to the Malfoy Estates because his mother was a whore and Lucius Malfoy couldn't help himself around a beautiful woman. It seems fortune smiled on him when he found out Narcissa's little secret."

I look at him suspiciously as he smirks.

"Don't believe me?" he asks with his brows raised. "Why don't you ask him yourself?"

"What do you mean?" I whisper, putting my hand on Ethan's head as his heart beats against my chest.

"He's standing right behind you."

The hairs on the back of my neck stand on end and I reluctantly turn around. I see him before he lifts his wand, golden eyes glowing against the light... The last thing I hear before I fall is Blaise Zabini commenting on all the blood.

_The Malfoy's are awful people... I'm an awful person... but Blaise is the worst._

Truer words have never been spoken.


	22. Prelude to the War

_Prelude to the war_

It's an uncommonly warm day in October so I take off my cardigan, slinging it over the twisted banister as I arrange the pumpkins on the porch. There are six all together... A cyclops, a vampire, a spider, a dragon, a mummy, and a zombie... all lined up in a perfect little row. I turn them so they're facing the road and look around to make sure no one is watching before pulling out my wand and lighting them with a flick of my wrist. They roar to life with green fire that licks around inside each pumpkin in an odd devilish dance that makes me smile.

I want everything to be just right for when Ethan comes home.

My son loves Halloween and I've spent the better part of my morning turning our old Victorian into the ultimate haunted house to surprise him. I step back to appraise my work with my hands on my hips. I've wrapped every beam with fake spider webs that sparkle in the light and I made cut outs of ghosts to hang in the windows so when the lights are on it will look like they're floating around our house in the darkness. I bite the corner of my lip and glance at the dementors hanging from the trees in the front yard. Of course, muggles have no idea what they are... but they look pretty freaky anyways.

"Oh, Ginny!"

I close my eyes when I hear Linda's voice and I plant a fake smile on my face before turning around to face her. Linda's my bottle blond neighbor that loves spray tans and plastic surgery as much as she claims to love Jesus. She's my friend, though...kind of... In a neighborhood full of old money and decaying homes she's really the only one that bothers to talk to me.

"This is a hazard," she jokes as she weaves her way though the foam tombstones I stuck in the grass. "Wow, Gin... You really went all out this year."

Linda was born and raised here in Virginia and she has an accent to match. Her lips are puffy and pink with lip gloss and she makes a duck face as she looks over the house.

"How do you have time to do all of this?" The wand burns against my thigh and I push it down a little further so she won't see it. "Oh! I love all those black wreaths. What'd you make those out of?"

"Twigs and spray paint," I answer and she smiles, a big pearly grin that's so white it's almost blinding.

"You're so crafty," she says, punching my shoulder. Her rings hurt and I rub out the pain with my palm. "You should start your own blog. I swear you could make a fortune just from the ads! That's how everyone's getting rich now-a-days."

I snort at the thought and she flicks some hair over her shoulder. It falls down her back in blonde curls and I stare at it for a moment as something stirs within me... Something like a memory just barely there, scratching the surface of my mind... I shake it away quickly and smile when she gives me a questioning look with her perfectly made up face. I don't see how she manages to look so put together all the time, especially being the stay at home mother of three wild children. I always feel so frumpy next to her and I only have one kid to take care of.

Linda starts messing with her hair again, her finger nails finished bright blue and shimmering with glitter. She calls it her_ super star manicure_ and I look down at my own dull nails, half bitten to the quick and as ugly as hell.

"Oh, Gin-Gin," she sighs in a sing song voice as she brushes something from my shoulder. I suspect it must be dirt of some sort and she smiles at me when I furrowed my brows. "You're always covered in dirt or paint when I see you." Her blue eyes twinkle as she looks me over and I hide my hands in my pockets.

I know she actually likes me, which makes me feel guilty for not trying to be a better friend to her.

…_.I think if I was in your position, I would be the saddest girl in the world._

I shake my head to rid it of that candy coated voice that haunts me from time to time. I think it's because Linda reminds me of someone. Someone who was once in my life... but I can hardly remember them now...

We both jump when a horn sounds and I turn quickly, my hand automatically going to the hidden wand in my pocket.

"Don't worry," Linda waves a manicured hand like my reaction was silly. "It's just Matilda."

"You left your toddler in the car?" I say in disbelief, looking at her large SUV. I can see the pudgy two year old bouncing around in the drivers seat, having the time of her life with her blond curls in pigtails. "Linda, that is so dangerous."

"It's fine, I cracked a window," she says as she pulls out the phone from her pocket. "It's almost time to pick up the boys. I thought we could car pool today..." she says as she starts texting, not once looking up from the screen to judge my reaction. "That way we could see them come out in their adorable costumes."

I hesitate a second. Her kids are really hyper and my Ethan is pretty laid back. I think it all gets a little over whelming for him when they're all together.

"Let's head out," she says as she pulls out her keys, not once looking up from her phone.

She starts walking off...

I guess I'm going, then.

"Just give me a second," I say as I run into the house. I grab my phone and I pause a second to look around the front hallway as I stuff it in my pocket. I used a lot of magic to make the front of the house look like a dark forest, with smoke rolling in from under the stairs and lights flickering against the tree branches like fire flies. I hid a few of Ethan's favorite toys just to give him something fun to do when he gets home and I'm sure he's going to love it.

I smile a little to myself and then lock the door behind me, grabbing my cardigan from the railing and putting it over my t-shirt.

Linda is already in the car and her daughter is secured in the back. I wave at little Matilda as I pass by her window and then I slide into the passenger seat, craning my neck to give one final look to the house to make sure it still looks good.

"Geena made the boys costume this year," Linda says and I blink away from the house to stare at her profile. "They are so adorable. You are going to _love _it."

"I'm sure," I say as I look out the window and think of my son... How adorable he looked in his costume this morning... I smile at the thought and only vaguely listen to Linda as she talks to me about a friend of a friend who is pregnant by a one night stand who also contracted a severe case of gonorrhea last year.

Charming stuff, really.

It only takes us a ten minutes to get to the school and the kids are already piling out of the building in straight little lines as we park the car. It's a private school and they usually wear uniforms made up of khakis and dress shirts, so to see them looking so wild and free is kind of fun.

The third graders start to march out of the building and I smile when I see Linda's twins. They're blond haired, blue eyed boys named Paul and Peter and they're as rambunctious as they come. When they see their mother, they start running towards her dressed as toothpaste and a tooth brush. I laugh at how silly they look... silly and so very adorable. Peter puts Paul in a head lock and starts wrestling with him as they approach with quick steps, nearly tripping over their cloth and cardboard outfits.

_Fred and George..._

I shake the voice away. Nonsense. Pure nonsense, that voice.

"That _is _cute," I say but Linda doesn't answer because she's too busy taking pictures with her smart phone.

I crane my neck so I can spot my Ethan when Miss Shelby's first grade class starts coming out of the building. I see his teacher and all of his class mates... but he's not with them.

"Where is..." I start walking towards the school with my face getting hot. I always have this fear of losing him...That one day he will leave and it will be like he never existed. "Where is he?" I say to myself as I push through the throng of children running towards their parents and waiting in the bus lines.

When I _finally_ see his head of dark hair, I exhale slowly in relief.

"Thank goodness," I whisper as I speed walk towards him. He has his hands stuffed in his pockets and a firm frown on his little face as the doors shut behind him. When I notice that he's not wearing his costume, I tilt my head in question. "Hey baby," I say when I get close enough and he glances up... dark eyes shining in the sunlight. "Where's your costume?"

He nods to his backpack where I can see a bit of the red cape peeking out.

"Why did you take it off? I thought you wanted to be superman this year."

"I don't want to anymore," he answers flatly, his voice soft and barely audible.

"Why?" I ask, stopping him and kneeling down so we're eye level. He's wearing his khakis and a light blue dress shirt that's buttoned all kinds of wrong. "What happened?" I push hair away from his face to try to judge his reaction... but he's not giving me anything.

"I want to go home."

I nod my head, accepting his answer because I don't want to press him in front of everyone.

Of course, Linda notices he's not wearing a costume and points it out as soon as we get to the car. I give her a quick look to drop it, but she's already moved on to her next distraction. Her phone rings and she answers it, chit chatting loudly with one of her friends about some gossip going down with her high school sweetheart.

I wish I would have driven myself and I give Ethan a sympathetic smile as he climbs into the car, buckling his seat belt with his lower lip caught between his teeth as he sends shy looks to the other children. The twins are going crazy in the back seat and Matilda is crying over a toy she dropped on the floor.

I understand his reluctance.

My Ethan has always been melancholy and he carries a weight around that's unfitting for a child of six. Sometimes I look at him and I feel like he must have the oldest soul that has lived a million lives... I watch my son from the rear view mirror as Linda puts the car in drive and I sigh a little when he presses his forehead to the glass, watching the trees pass by.

"Did you get a sitter for tonight?" Linda asks over the wails of her daughter and I glance her way when she puts her phone in the cup holder. "Remember? Murry and I are having a little get together after trick-or-treating is done. I sent you an e-vite," she says like I would know or care what that is. "It's just a little bit of candy for the grown ups, if you know what I mean," she says as she wiggles her brows. I catch Ethan in the mirror again. He's looking at me now, his dark brows furrowed as he waits to hear my answer. "It's gonna be fun."

We make eye contact in the mirror and I smile a little.

"I don't think we can," I say gently, giving her an apologetic look. "We couldn't find anyone to watch Ethan." I lie because we never even tried.

I spy Ethan's relief before he goes back to staring at the trees.

She makes an odd hmf sound like she was irritated with me before waving her hand. "Just bring him and he can hang out with my boys. If we throw an extra twenty at Geena she won't mind watching another child. You need to get out and socialize more often."

I don't say anything to that and I turn in my seat when we get closer to the house. "Ethan," I say gently and he glances at me. "Close your eyes," I tell him with a smile. "I've got a surprise for you."

For a moment he looks happy and then he slams his eyes shut with excitement making him sit up straight. Linda starts talking to me about redoing her kitchen in summer colors and I only half listen until we pull in front of our house. When I go to open the door, Linda grabs my arm and smirks.

"Remember," she says, nodding her head. " Ten o'clock...and bring that handsome husband of yours."

I give her a tight smile as I go to the back to help Ethan out of his seat. His eyes are still firmly closed and I hold him against my hip like he was a toddler again. His body is the dead weight of a loved child against my side as I walk him towards the front of the house with my lips pressed to his cheek. When I place him on his feet, I kneel behind him and wait for Linda to speed off before gingerly taking out my wand.

"Ready?" I ask softly into his ear and I can feel his smile as he nods his head. "Okay... One... Two... Three..." I lift my wand and shoot a spell. "Open your eyes."

The house comes to life with magic, lights burning brightly, illuminating dark shadows and showing off the mechanical werewolves on the balcony. It starts to dance... turns and clanks and glittering lights that make him roll on his toes.

"What do you think?" I ask against his ear, pulling him to me with my arm around his middle. "Do you like it?"

He nods again and I kiss his cheek.

"Wait until you see the front hallway."

He runs inside and I jog in behind him, loving the sound of his laughter as he walks through the forest I had made for him.

"Brilliant," I hear him whisper and I smile smugly while warding the door behind us.

"Hey," I say and he looks over his shoulder, a large grin on his face. "I hid some things around those trees," I say, nodding to a large root. When he sees one of his plush toys... a turtle named Thaddeus... he nearly squeals in delight as he runs towards it. "If you can find all five, I'll let you have a piece of candy before dinner."

That makes him happy and he takes off, disappearing into the magical land I had made for him while I go into the living room. I take a seat on the couch and pull his backpack to my lap, unzipping the top so I can grab his superman costume. I fold it up, laying it on the arm rest and running my fingers over the home made cape before pulling out a story book. I look it over curiously and sigh loudly when I realize which one it is.

"Ethan," I say as I shake my head and turn the leather bound book in my hand.

_The Strange Tales of the Wandering Knight. _

It's a children's book with moving illustrations that tells the story of a wizard who uses magic to become a knight. Ethan knows he's not allowed to bring this book to school and I bite the corner of my lip as I flip through the pages. The whole thing shimmers with a spell to keep the pictures moving like a television screen and the words move about the page whenever they're looked at by human eyes.

It's Ethan's favorite, but he knows he can't show the book to anyone. Not to muggles, anyways, and that's all he's ever been around. Ethan knows that we're different than other families, of course... He knows that I am a witch and his father is a wizard and one day he will be a wizard too... but I don't think he totally grasps that the muggles we're surrounded by are not like us and our magical items are not to be mixed with them even though we've told him so time and time again.

I guess it's unfair to ask a child to hide a part of himself from the world... but it's safe here... We're far away from the dangers of home and the warlord that resides in England. There was a purge after the war where pureblooded families were being targeted by fringe elements who wanted them dead. The government was torn apart and a warlord took over, changing the voted in tribunal into a dictatorship one bloody night in the spring. We moved to America when Ethan was just a baby to escape it and here we've stayed... in a crumbling home in Virginia among the muggles where no one knows who we truly are.

I put the book to the side and take out his homework folder. Inside I find his spelling words written in his shaking boyish hand writing and a couple sentences he had strung together with them. I smile at the drawing he made of our trip to the zoo before finding the red slip hiding behind one of the pockets.

We get one of these every other week.

I hesitate a second before unfolding the slip to see his teacher's familiar script written in bold sharpie.

_Ethan got in trouble for disrupting class. He had to be sent into the hallway for shouting in a nonsense language during reading time._

"Mama!" I look up. Ethan has all of the toys I had hidden, but his smile falters when he sees the red slip.

He _knows _what that means.

"Come here," I sigh, patting the spot next to me.

He thinks he's in trouble and his eyes water for a second before be bites back his emotions and walks towards me with his jaw tight and fists clenched. He lets his toys falls to the ground as he climbs beside me and I pull him to my lap, pressing my lips to his temple so he knows I'm not angry with him.

"Did you talk to Lyle today?" I ask softly, leaning back to look into his eyes.

He nods his head.

"What did he say?"

He shrugs and when I press him, he furrows his brows. "He was hungry," he admits after a long pause.

"Remember when we talked about this last time?" I ask gently and he nods, dark hair falling across his brows in a way that makes him look like such a serious little man. "I told you that if he starts talking to you again... just ignore him. All he does is get you in trouble."

"I know, but he wouldn't be quiet and I just wanted to listen to the story," he says, his little hands balled up in frustration. "And I tried to be nice and tell him to be please stop... but everybody laughed at me and Miss Shelby told me to stop it... but he just kept on talking." He looks away, his cheeks red in anger. "So I yelled at him."

"And them Miss Shelby made you sit in the hallway?" I finish for him and he nods his head... a short and angry nod. "I'm sorry, baby," I tell him as I hug him tightly. "I'm going to talk to your teacher on Monday. Maybe we can finally convince her to move Lyle out of her room."

_...and maybe she'll listen this time_. My thoughts become bitter as I think of his first grade teacher. Miss Shelby is a spinster well into her sixties who's as hard as nails and seems to hate children with a passion. I honestly think she has no business teaching first graders.

"Why doesn't he bother anyone else?" Ethan asks, pulling me from my thoughts as I run my fingers through his hair.

"No one else can understand him," I say honestly as I think of Lyle, Miss Shelby's class pet... He's a red corn snake with orange stripes on his back and beady eyes that glisten.

"I wish I could never understand him," Ethan says, his voice twisted in irritation. "He just ruins everything." I lean back as he makes himself comfortable against me and he starts playing with one of the buttons on my cardigan, twisting and pulling until I'm sure he means to pop it off. "Why can't you hear snakes like me?" he asks, his lips in a firm frown.

"The same reason why your hair is brown and my hair is red," I explain as I squeeze his arm. "It's just something we're born with. Sometimes you get things from your family members that others don't. I think it's a very special talent." I give him a little smile. "Just imagine all the adventures you could go on."

He thinks on that for a moment before his stomach growls and we both laugh.

"Are you hungry?" I ask with a smile and he nods a sheepish head. "Lets go get a snack. Shall we?"

I let him lead the way into the kitchen and I pull out some fruit and yogurt from the refrigerator while he takes a seat at the table.

"Do you want to tell me why you took off your costume? Was it bothering you?" I ask curiously as I pour him a glass of milk. "Was the cape itching-"

"Superman is not real," he cuts me off, giving me a look like I was silly. "He has super powers, but he's not real."

"But you still like him, don't you? Just because a person isn't real doesn't mean they have any less to offer. A hero is still a hero even if they only exist on the page."

"I am real," he says as I place his snack in front of him with a handful of pretzels on the side.

"Of course you are," I reply as I sit beside him and grab a strawberry from his plate.

"I am real and I like being Ethan," he says and I give him a soft smile.

"I am glad you like being Ethan," I tell him, leaning forward to kiss his head. "Because Ethan is my favorite man in the world." He smiles at me before starting to eat. "Do you still want to go trick-or-treating tonight?" I ask carefully and he blinks a few times before nodding his head. "Do you still want to dress up... or do you want to just be Ethan tonight?"

He shrugs.

I pause for a second as I watch him and then I think of the book hidden in his backpack. "Perhaps you would like to dress up as Bodrick the Bold," I say and when he looks at me, his eyes are shining in recognition. "You can be the Wandering Knight. I know he's not real, but he could talk to snakes," I tell him with a smile. "He was special like you."

He smiles again, a full out grin that turns my heart.

"Would you like that?" I ask and he nods his head, causing his dark hair to fall across his brows.

"I would but... but I don't have that costume..." He starts to pout at the thought and I smirk, pulling the wand from my pocket.

"Your Mommy is a very talented witch," I say as I twirl the wand in my hand. "I'm sure we can make something suitable."

He jumps up and down in his seat and I make him finish his snack before we start gathering supplies. The wandering knight always wears full armor colored a dark navy with a bright red cape. I take his superman cape and take off the giant S on the back, then I start cutting out cardboard pieces for his armor. All the while Ethan hands me tools and gives me ideas like a good little helper. He's very serious about this business and I send him sly little looks as he bites the corner of his lip with his brow furrowed in concentration. I smile a little and kiss the side of his head, pressing my nose to his hair and taking him in.

"Mom..." he pushes me away. "We're working."

I laugh at that and go back to cutting.

It takes us hours to get the whole thing right and then I make him stand up so I can press the pieces against his little body to make sure it's all going to work together.

"This is going to be just great," he whispers when I start changing the color of the pieces with my wand until it shimmers into a deep dark blue. "Don't forget the star."

Of course. The wandering knight has a bright yellow star on his chest plate. I have him fetch his paint brushes so I can carefully outline the symbol. After I'm finished, I hand the brush to my Ethan and let him fill it in.

"Stay in the lines," I remind him as his shaking hand tries to make it perfect. "Good job."

He smiles and I make him stand on the couch again when he's done. I piece together the armor, making it stick with magic and tape and glue...

"I think this just might work," I tell him as I secure the _used to be superman_ cape around his shoulders and cinching it with a home made clasp around his neck. "I don't think I'll be able to make a helmet, though," I tell him honestly as I push hair away from my face. "Is that alright?"

He nods his head, looking down at our handiwork as I use my wand to fix up the rough edges.

"I need a wand," he says as he bends down and grabs his discarded story book. He opens to one of the pages and shows me a drawing of the wandering knight standing in front of a castle. "And a sword," he says, pointing to the picture. "And a spell book too. See!"

"I think we have most of that," I tell him as I stand back to appraise our work. "What do you think?" I ask softly, making him lift his arms and bend his knees. "How does that feel? Is it too heavy?"

"It feels fine," he says shortly, officially done with the work part.

"Run to the stairs and then run back."

"Why?" he asks with a frown. I lift him from the couch and place him on his feet.

"I just want to make sure you can move," I tell him, looking over the costume and taking the book. "Go on, run to the stairs."

I turn him and give his back a little push.

"Go on."

He starts trudging that way... almost waddling. "Why are you walking like that?" I ask seriously with a hand on my hip. "Run normally."

He sighs loudly before actually running towards the banister—and a few pieces fall before he even reaches it.

"Alright, come back."

I pick up the pieces and make him stand on the couch again as I use my wand to fix it all again.

When I'm finished, I have him run around until it all stays in place. It looks clearly homemade and almost last minute... but I like it and Ethan likes it too because he's smiling like a fool each time he looks down at it.

"Let me fix the cape," I tell him and he groans as I make him climb on the couch one last time. He stares blankly at the wall as I adjust the cape with his cheeks flushed from all the running. "Are you going to say the words?" I ask to keep him engaged and when he looks at me, I wiggle my brows. "When there is darkness..." I start for him with a smile.

"When there is darkness I will bring the light," he says, smiling a dimpled smile with shining brown eyes like mine. "Where there is struggle I will bring my might. Where there is-"

He gets cut off by a loud pop of Apparation that sounds like crack of thunder coming from the open App zone in the garage. Ethan looks at me with his eyes shining and he curls on his toes, knowing what that noise means.

"Dad," he says before hopping off the couch and running towards the kitchen.

I look at my watch and blink a few times. Jesus, I didn't realize it was six already.

"Wait for the knock, Ethan!" I call behind him.

It's a security thing we do... just in case.

_Tap. Tap... Tap. Tap. Tap... Tap. Tap. _Two short knocks then a pause before three long ones and then finished with two short ones again. Something that was a agreed upon years ago...

"Dad!" he calls when the doors open, having grown past the point of calling him Daddy... but every once in a while it slips and I find it so adorable.

"Oh, look at you," I hear his father answer and I smile when I step into the kitchen. He's standing in the threshold that leads to the garage with his hands on his hips and a little smirk threatening to break at the corner of his mouth. "The wandering knight in all his glory."

"How does it look?" Ethan asks. He stands back and turns around to show his father, swishing the cape around a few times because I know he just likes the way it feels. "We worked really hard on it all day."

"It looks very good, indeed," his father says, ruffling Ethan's hair and lifting him with a quick kiss to the head. "Mommy's been busy, hasn't she?"

"Don't move him too much," I warn, walking towards them when he puts Ethan back on the ground. "That thing is held together with magic and a prayer."

_Literally._

He laughs and grabs me around the waist to steal a kiss. "What happened to Superman?" he asks against my lips.

"He decided he wanted to be the knight instead," I answer with a shrug.

"Well, I agree with that choice." He pulls away from me to put his bag down on the table. "It is much better to be a wizard than an alien, I always say."

"Is that truly something you _always_ say?" I question with a brow up and he laughs.

"I try to get it in at least twice a day," he jokes as he heels out of his loafers.

He's wearing the midnight blue robes of a potions master and he shrugs out of them, leaving him in the white button down and gray slacks he put on this morning. He always smells like fire when he comes home and I crinkle my nose when I catch a pretty strong whiff of it. I turn to Ethan and start messing with his outfit again, playing with the cape and adjusting the bits on his shoulders

"How was work?" I ask when I realize I barely even looked at him.

"It was hardly worth getting out of bed for," he admits, creeping up behind me and wrapping his arms around my middle...pulling me back into his chest. "I am hungry, though," he says as he presses his lips to my neck. I smirk and bring a hand up to run through his thick hair. "I had a light lunch and I'm regretting it now."

"I haven't even started dinner," I reply and Ethan looks up at me with his brow furrowed. "Why don't you go upstairs and get that sword from your toy chest, honey," I tell him just to give him something to do. "We can pick out a spell book from one of your father's potion texts."

He nods his head and takes off running, leaving me alone with my husband. I turn into his embrace and exhale slowly.

"I didn't realize we'd been working on his costume so long," I admit with a smile as I lean up to kiss the corner of his mouth... where that smug smirk is always threatening to appear. I start fiddling with his collar, loosening his tie and undoing the first few buttons of his shirt. "He's so excited."

"Why don't you go finish up?" he says, running his hand down my face and tilting my chin up. Successfully pulling me away from the coddling I was subjecting him to. "I'll make us something to eat."

I smile at that. He cooks dinner more often than I do... He's just so much better at it and he enjoys doing it a lot more... I suppose because it's so much like potions making and he's so very good at that.

"Thanks." I kiss him again. "You're good to keep around."

"I'm good for more than just cooking, you know," he says as he reaches down and grabs my bottom with a wink.

"Draco!" I laugh, batting his hand away... but his face falls and he pulls back, giving me a golden eyed glare.

"What did you just call me?"

I blink for a second when I try to remember... He get's so angry when I call him that silly name. "I don't know," I say, pulling him close to kiss him again. "I called you Blaise, of course," I correct myself as I run my fingers through his dark hair.

I don't know why I keep letting that name slip. I don't even know anyone named Draco.

"If you call me that again, I'm going to have you flogged," he says and I snort at the thought.

"You wouldn't even try," I tease him, pressing against his chest. "You love me too much."

"That," he smiles a little, a handsome smile that makes my heart melt. "And I'm scared of you. I'm all talk with hardly any bite." he laughs."But you have fangs."

Ethan comes running back into the room with his play sword, but he's frowning. "The pieces fell of again," he says and I smile before going to him and taking his hand.

"Come on. Back to the couch."

Blaise makes tortellini with pesto for dinner and after finishing Ethan's costume I make him take it off so we can eat our fill before trick-or-treating. He reminds of his earned candy and I let him pick out some chewy fruit thing before he sits down to eat in just a white undershirt and his khakis.

"Linda reminded me of her party tonight," I say over a glass of wine as Ethan digs into his pasta. Blaise raises a dark eyebrow in response because he knows what a home body I am. "She said we could bring Ethan and her nanny would watch him."

"Do you want to go?" Blaise asks as he uses his wand to refill his wine glass. He uses magic for everything. It honestly borders on laziness sometimes, but his reasoning is that he's a wizard without a house-elf, so what more can one expect from him?

"Not really," I admit as I look at my Ethan. He has pesto on his face now and he's devouring a piece of buttered bread. "I would rather just stay home."

"Then stay home, we must," he says as he takes my hand and kisses my knuckles. I smile and pull my hand back because I want to keep eating. "I hate going to those things anyways," he says as he picks up his fork. "That Linda woman is a real C-U-Next-Tuesday."

"Blaise," I scold, looking at Ethan who is perfectly oblivious. "Watch what you say around him. What if he says something like that at school?"

Blaise laughs at the thought and then winks at our son. "I'm sure he'll use it only when the situation permits it."

Right.

Blaise starts talking to Ethan about his day and our son doesn't bring up the snake or getting in trouble... and neither do I. I figure I'll talk to Blaise about it later... when Ethan isn't around because he always gets so upset.

Once dinner is finished, I suit Ethan up in the wandering knight outfit, rubbing his face clean of pesto, butter, and left over milk. He grouches at me the entire time and barely even smiles when I take a picture of him with the camera we brought from England so many years ago.

"Stop frowning so much," I tell him, pinching his cheek. Blaise goes upstairs to change into some casual clothes while Ethan and I get ready. "We want to remember this night forever," I tell him, snapping another picture of the nasty look he's giving me.

That one's going in the scrap book for sure.

"Mom?" he asks as I take a clean pillow case from the top of the laundry stack in the living room. I hand it to Ethan who's now impatiently waiting by the front door. "Do you think I'm weird?"

"Of course," I say and when he frowns at me, I smile and kneel down so we'll eye level. "All the greatest, most interesting people in the world are weird," I tell him as I take his hand and play with his little fingers.

"I don't want to be great or interesting," he says, looking impossibly adorable in the bulky home made armor. "I don't want to be weird either."

"Well... I am weird. Your father is weird... Everyone worth knowing is weird," I tell him, pushing his hair back because it always insists on getting in his eyes. "I think you're perfect. Weird is not an insult to people like us. It means we're not boring and there is nothing in this world more awful than being boring."

He smiles a little, accepting my answer for the moment and letting me kiss his forehead. I take down the magic forest I had made while we wait for his father and Ethan watches me with his head cocked to the side and a disappointed frown on his face. Blaise finally comes bounding down the stairs a few minutes later in a pair of denim jeans and a gray fisherman's sweater pulled over a soft white shirt. I catch myself staring at him longer than I should... and I can't look away as he runs his hands through his hair.

"What?" He asks.

I shake my head. "Nothing," I reply quickly as I grab my pea coat and button it up with a smile. "Are you ready, little man?" I ask as I push a hat over Ethan's head. "Put on the gloves. It gets cold at night," I tell him and he gives me a look before reluctantly putting on a pair of red gloves I made him take out from the closet.

Sometimes he finds me just so annoying. But I don't care. I'm his mother. I'm supposed to annoy him.

"Are we ready?" Blaise asks as he checks his pockets. "Do we have everything? Wand, stupid muggle phone that is fucking pointless..."

"I think we're good," I say as I open the door and Ethan goes stomping by me. I grab Blaise before he passes and give him a look. "Stop cursing."

"You might have to punish me," he says as he wiggles his brows and he laughs at the face I make. "Or, perhaps, I should punish you for trying to tell me what to do," he offers as he pulls me close and he nips at my lower lip with his sharp teeth.

I push him away.

"Stop it," I shake my head and he laughs.

Blaise sets up the candy bowl on the porch while I ward the door behind us, making sure no one is around as I take out my wand to do it.

"What if people take all the candy?" Ethan asks as Blaise puts up a handwritten sign that tells the kids just to take two pieces.

"Then the candy will be gone," Blaise answers. "But I like to think people are a little better than all that..." When I give him a look he laughs. "And we put a spell on it," he finally admits and Ethan looks at the bowl curiously. "No one will take more than two unless they want a shock. That's a good lesson, son," he says. "Always see the best in people, but be prepared for the worst."

"Oh..." Ethan says. He smiles like it was funny and then he takes off running down the sidewalk with the pillow case slung over his shoulder.

"Always see the best in people," I repeat his words as he takes my hand. "But be prepared for the worst."

"Words to live by," he says as we make our way down the sidewalk, passing children dressed up in colorful costumes. "Life is one big candy bowl," he smirks at me and I shake my head, leaning into his arm and using my free hand to wrap around his forearm.

Mrs. Melling, our elderly neighbor who lives in the colonial style house across the street calls to us from her porch. Blaise waves at her and then mumbles a nasty cuss word under his breath that earns him one of my glares.

"How are you doing tonight!?" she calls from her porch, waving me down like she wanted me to stop and cross the street. "I see your house is all decked out!"

"Yes. Very well, thank you!" I call back before speed walking away, pulling Blaise along with me. "See you later!" I add so I don't get stuck talking to her.

I don't have two hours to spare talking about her garden and the cyst she had on her ovary two months ago.

"Real smooth, Gin," Blaise says once we're out of ear shot and he laughs at the look I give him. "You practically just ran away from her. You know she's going to catch you on the way back."

"I have a series of distractions planned," I say and he smirks.

"That's my girl."

The whole neighborhood is out and we wave and nod and make small talk with the other parents as Ethan collects candy from all the various houses on our block. He's so adorable and his outfit is holding up rather well even though no one else knows who he is...

"Ethan got in trouble at school today," I say once we move on from a group of chatting parents I know from the neighborhood.

"Doesn't he always?" Blaise answers flatly. "What did he do now?

"He yelled at Lyle because he kept talking during reading time and was sent in the hall for it. I think I'm going to schedule a meeting with Miss Shelby and ask her to remove the snake again. "

"We've asked that bitch to get rid of that fucking class pet a million times," he says sharply and I look around to make sure we're not in hearing range of any children. "But she won't. So we can either take matters into our own hands...which, considering I'm a fucking wizard and you're a fucking witch could be quite easy... or we can do what I originally wanted to do in the beginning and just get him a private tutor. He's not a muggle, Ginny." he says, his eyes shining against the street lights. "He's a wizard and the older he gets, the more different he's going to seem to them."

"I just wanted him to make friends," I admit in a small voice as I watch Ethan run down the sidewalk a few yards in front of us, his red cape billowing behind him.

"He's not making friends," Blaise says and the truth hurts, so I look away for a moment. "He doesn't get invited to birthday parties and the other kids don't like him."

"I don't think that's true," I say, offended that anyone wouldn't like my Ethan. "They're too young to even think that way."

"Gin," Blaise shakes his head like I was being silly. "He hisses at that snake most of the day and they laugh at him... When they laugh at him he ends up doing accidental magic. I know he doesn't mean to do it... but he does things to their minds and most of those children are afraid of him now. If we home schooled him, he would be a lot happier. He's too stressed out. He has a stomach ache nearly every morning before school. You know something is wrong. We're not helping him by making him go. We're harming him."

"Why don't we just go back to England?" I ask softly. "Move into a magical neighborhood so he can be around kids his own age who share his talents."

"We can't go back to England now. You know it's dangerous if we're recognized by the wrong type of people. There are many who want to use your blood and they will kill me and Ethan to get it. The administration that's in charge right now will not grant us safe passage... We just need to wait it out here, where it's safe, before returning to our world."

I nod my head in understanding and then I turn to Ethan again. He looks so happy... but he's alone... While the other kids are running around with their friends... my son is forever by himself...

Maybe it would be best to take him out of school and get a tutor.

"I don't want him to be lonely," I admit softly. "I don't think it's healthy for a boy just to be around his parents all the time."

Blaise is silent for a few moments as we cross the street and then he smiles to himself. "He needs a sibling," he says and when I look at him, he raises an eyebrow. "A brother or a sister will do."

"Stop."

"I'm serious," he says and when I look, I realize he's actually telling the truth. "I think it's time."

I turn away and furrow my brow as I think about it. To be honest... I'm not sure if I even want any more children. I love Ethan more than anything... but there is something inside of me that's sour to the idea.

"We don't want them to be too far apart in age if we want them to be friends," he continues. "And Ethan is already six."

"I think that's a conversation we need to have some other time," I say flatly, not wanting to tell him no again after so many years of begging.

Blaise has wanted more children from the moment we came to America and I am forever raining on his parade. We were too young when we had Ethan... Too young and too unprepared for what parenthood could mean. It's a lesson that we're still learning and, even though we've grown so much from those first sleepless years on our own, we're still young.

"I don't understand why you don't want to have more children with me," he says, his face smiling but his voice sour and dark. "It's starting to hurt my feelings."

"When you're the one with a wrecked body and morning sickness then you can have hurt feelings," I snap and he laughs, but it's hallow and unfeeling.

"I'm serious, Ginny. Look at him," he says, nodding to Ethan who's coming down the steps of a red brick home surrounded by hanging ghosts made out of tissue paper. "I didn't have any brothers and sisters growing up and I think my life would have been different had I had any."

I ponder on that. He's right, of course. I never had any siblings either and my parents died not long after the war started. We're completely alone in this world. All we have is each other and the family we've made together...

"Would it really be so bad?" he asks softly, watching my profile as we walk through the fallen leaves.

"No," I say honestly as I blink a few times. "It wouldn't be bad," I admit and I can feel the smile on his face without even having to look. "Just let me think about it, okay?" I say gently and I know... I know he knows I might say yes this time and that pleases him greatly.

He leans over and kisses the side of my head.

"Think away," he says with a smirk. "But let me know soon so I can draw up a fucking schedule."

"Jesus, Blaise," I hiss, hitting his arm at his joke. "These kids are going to hear you."

"Let them. They're just words," he says with a humored shrug. "And besides, remember how big your tits got last time?" he asks and I give him an affronted look that he finds amusing. "I like that part the best."

"And they were never the same again." I counter and he smirks. "So let's just drop it now."

"If you wish," he teases, moving his arm so he can wrap his hand around my hip to pull me close. "But we'll pick it up later," he can't help but add and I give him another sour look that earns me a smirk.

"Ginny! Blaise!" I inhale an annoyed breath when I hear Linda's voice. She's dressed like an angel with wings and she's holding a bowl of candy on the porch of her large yellow house. "Come talk to me," she says as she throws a handful of chocolate bars into Ethan's pillow case with out even looking at him. "Geena took the kids out so I'm stuck here handing out candy. Murry is in the house getting drunk already," she rolls her eyes as I put my hand on Ethan's hat, where his hair is peaking out from underneath in dark wings around his face. "You can go in and say hi if you want," she says, blinking at Blaise and smiling. "We have a ton of beer ready for tonight."

I hide a face at the way she's looking at Blaise... She thinks he's pretty and I'm sure she wants to fuck him. It doesn't really upset me or anything... Everyone wants to fuck Blaise, but I hate it when they stare at him so openly. He's smart, rich, and good looking... with a foreign accent to boot. It's a perfect combination that makes every ovary in the vicinity practically explode when he's around.

"American beer is shit," Blaise answers as Ethan starts bouncing impatiently by my side.

Linda laughs like his joke was funny, but he wasn't joking... he actually hates American beer as much as he hates American cheese. He's a picky bastard when it comes to his taste buds.

"Well, we have plenty of other drinks at the ready," she smiles wide at him and then she looks at me, her smile a little bit duller. "You are coming, right? I already told Geena you were bringing your kid and she agreed to watch him. You remember me talking about Cara, right?" she says, waving her hand and I nod. I guess I remember... "Well, she's coming and you need to meet her. You just have to come. You're going to come, right?" she asks, blinking at Blaise and he looks to me for direction. "Of course you're coming. I already told everyone that you would."

_Of course, you have to come... _I blink at the sweet voice in my head. The sugary voice of a friendship long forgotten.

"Mommy?" I shake out of it and look down at Ethan. He is so bored. "There are more houses..."

"I know, babe," I tell him and I sigh before looking at Blaise.

I want him to be the bad guy and say no, but he just raises an eyebrow waiting for my answer. I'm forever a people pleaser and I reluctantly nod my head because... because a part of me wants to go too. "I think we can come for a little bit."

She squeals in delight before handing me some candy. "For the road," she jokes. "I'll see you at ten, then?"

I nod my head and then I start steering us away, putting the candy in Ethan's pillow case when we hit the side walk. Blaise starts laughing and then he shakes his head as he pulls me close when we get far enough away.

"Honestly," he starts, smiling when Ethan takes off running ahead of us. "You need to start working on your bitch skills. You're bloody awful at it."

"You could have said something," I hiss and he just laughs some more. "You didn't want to go."

"I didn't care either way. I'm not fighting your girl battles for you. She's your friend."

I frown at that. "You don't think we'll be expected to dress up, do you?" I ask with a horrified face.

"We'll just go as insanely good looking people. Luckily we're already wearing the costume," he says as he smirks.

I laugh a little. Sometimes his jokes tickle me too.

We cover another block before heading back to the house and I pull out my phone, pretending to do that texting thing when Mrs. Melling waves me down. We make it into the house without delay and I sigh happily at the thought... before realizing that soon we'll have to go back out and I'm have to brave Mrs. Melling again.

_Ugh... _

"Let's take a look at what you got tonight, mate," Blaise picks Ethan up and they walk towards the living room. Ethan dumps out all of his candy on the floor and starts sorting it in little piles as he sits on his knees, looking excited with his cheeks red from running. "Quite a stash you got there. Let's hope your Mommy doesn't eat it all this year."

"Shut up," I say as I take off my coat. "You ate more than I did last year."

"Can I have some tonight?" Ethan asks, looking at me and blinking before turning to his father.

"Just two pieces," Blaise answers as he lays down on the floor beside him and starts sorting though the candy as well. "We don't want you to get a stomach ache."

"I'm going to get dressed," I call to them from the hallway.

Blaise waves a dismissive hand as I climb the stairs to our bedroom. It's decorated in plums, greens, and golds of varying shades with a king size bed lounging against the south side wall. I strip out of my clothes until I'm left in just my underthings and then I go to our walk in closet, rummaging through my clothes and frowning at everything I own. I never have anything I want to wear... but as Blaise has pointed out on numerous occasions... I have far too many clothes.

It's so frustrating sometimes.

I tap my fingers against my lips as I decide whether I want to wear a dress or jeans... but when I hear footsteps in the hallway, I quickly pull on a slip just in case Ethan comes in the room. My panic was for nothing, because it's Blaise and he smirks when he sees what I'm wearing.

"I'm having Ethan change into something more comfortable," he says as he closes the door behind him, his eyes dark and focused on my breasts. "Is that what you're wearing?"

"Obviously not," I chide him as he slinks towards me, his movements languid and heavy with a particular purpose that I have no time for. "Don't even," I tell him as I put my hand up. "We don't have time."

"There is always time," he says as he grabs my wrist and pulls me towards him with a yank. "You over estimate me," he adds as he lifts his wand to lock the door.

I try to push him away, but he laughs and pins his body against mine, pressing me into the closet door. He kisses me before I can get away from him and holds my right hand down in a iron grip when I attempt to push him back. It's a savage kiss that makes my head spin and when he pushes his knee between my legs...I feel something in me give way. The carnal lust of a husband after years of marriage does something to me and after a few moments of hesitation... I kiss him back.

"Get on the bed," he says, pulling back and giving me a serious look with his golden eyes shining once he realizes he's won me over.

Which he always does.

"Ethan..." I trail off as I think of him and Blaise is quick with an answer.

"He's playing with some toys in his room. We've got time," he says as he pulls the sweater over his head. "Bed," he commands. When I hesitate, he narrows his eyes before bending down and actually lifting me up to put me there himself. "It pisses me off when you don't listen to me," he says and I snort in laughter as he dumps me on the bed.

"Then you must always be in a state of anger," I comment as I sit on the edge of the bed with my feet dangling just above the floor. I lift his t-shirt and kiss his chest, trailing my lips down his stomach.

"True," he says as I start on his belt buckle. "But then I get to live through moments like this and it makes me feel better ."

"Moments like this," I repeat as I start working on unzipping his jeans. "And what do you think is going to happen exactly?" I ask, placing another kiss just above his boxers.

"Something that involves your mouth and my dick," he says with a smug smirk. I lick my lips, laying back on my bed and resting on my elbows as I smile up at him.

Poor guy, he looks so thoroughly disappointed... until I start taking off the slip and then I hook my thumbs into the waist band of my knickers so I can push them down.

"Never mind that," he says when I bundle up the bit of lace and I throw it behind me. He pulls out of his clothes quickly and then he crawls on top of me, caging my body underneath his.

"Never mind?" I ask as I reach between our bodies to grab him. He inhales sharply and I push his shoulder, changing positions so I'm the one on top. "But it's Friday, you cooked an amazing dinner, and you looked very good in that sweater..."

He looks up at me with his hands on my thighs as he tries to judge my expression.

"Does that merit a blow job?" he asks with his head cocked to the side. "Please say that it does."

I smirk and start moving down, but when I hear something crash in the hallway, I jump and scurry to put on clothes before running out and finding Ethan with toys all around him just outside the bedroom door.

"What are you doing?" I ask as I kneel down to help him pick them up with my cheeks red.

"I dropped them," he explains as he starts throwing them in his back pack. "Daddy said we were leaving for a little bit."

He's wearing a pair of sweats and a thermal shirt with miss matched socks and I give him a little smile when he looks at me. My Ethan is a bit of a hoarder when it comes to his toys and he's packed about twenty little action figures like he would never see them again if he didn't bring them tonight.

"Blaise," I call over my shoulder. "Are you decent?"

"Fully dressed," he calls back, sounding disappointed as I take Ethan's hand and lead him into the bedroom. Blaise is in the bathroom and I set my Ethan down on the bed. "Stay," I tell him with a wink as I go back to my closet to pick out an outfit. "We're going over to Paul and Peter's house for a little bit," I tell him so he knows what's going on. "We're not going to stay very long," I reassure him as I pull out a pair of dark skinny jeans and a white blouse. "But it will be fun to stay up a little later, right?" I say, smiling at him as I pick out a black blazer. Blaise was right. Ethan doesn't really have any friends, but Peter and Paul treat him nicely, even though they're crazy as hell. "What do you think?"

"Can I bring my toys?"

"Of course you can."

When Blaise comes out of the bathroom, I go in myself to get dressed. I redo my hair and touch up my make-up, studying my reflection in the mirror and getting angrier for giving in because I do not want to go to Linda's and I do not want to take Ethan.

"Babe," Blaise raps his knuckles against the door. "It's getting late and Ethan's almost asleep. If you want to go, we need to go now."

I nod my head even though he can't see me and I open the door a second later. He nods approvingly at my outfit and once down stairs, I put on a pair of heels by the front door while Blaise pushes a pair of trainers of Ethan's tired little feet. Linda's house is only a block away, so we opt to walk with Blaise carrying Ethan against his chest, leaving me free to bite my fingernails nervously.

"You shouldn't have said yes if you didn't want to go," Blaise scolds me when he sees my hesitation and I give him a narrow eyed glare.

"I know that," I tell him flatly.

I can hear the music from here and I give Ethan a sad look as we approach her brightly lit house.

"How old is Linda anyways?" he asks, hiking Ethan up as we go up the walkway towards her home. "I know her husband is fucking ancient."

"Thirty...Thirty two, I think... Murry isn't that old. I don't even think he's forty yet."

"That bitch is too damn old to be having house parties on the weekends. She should be having afternoon brunches and clam bakes," he says and I laugh as he takes my hand. "Wine tasting on Wednesdays and maybe once a year she'll go bar hopping with the girls and thoroughly embarrass herself, but this... this is reprehensible."

"Yet, here we are," I say as we climb the porch stairs.

"Yes," he says, giving me a look. "Here we are."

I ring the door bell and no one comes for a few long moments before a man dressed as a viking opens the door. His face red and his eyes blurry with drink.

"Hey," he says, looking between me, my husband, and then to Ethan. "You brought a kid. That's not cool, man."

"Is Linda anywhere around?" I ask and he blinks a few times.

"Hey," he says again and Blaise narrows his eyes. "You're from Ireland."

"England." I correct and he blinks.

"Same thing," he shrugs, stepping aside and to let us through. "Linda's over there." he nods to a group of women dancing around a large speaker where modern club music is blaring.

My poor Ethan covers his ears and whines.

"Ginny and Blaise!" Linda calls when she sees us, a drink in her hand. "Oh, you made it." she pushes through people until she reaches us and then she looks me over. "Where are your costumes?"

"Can we take him upstairs?" I ask, rubbing Ethan's back.

"Oh, yeah, let me show you!"

We follow her wobbly steps up the stairs. She keeps talking, but I can't hear her and Blaise doesn't care so neither of us try to talk back. After forever, we finally reach a room on second floor... It's a toy room that's in complete disarray and the twins are running around like crazy, their faces smeared with chocolate and candy. The nanny, Geena, is looking frazzled as she rocks Matilda back and forth in a rocking chair while the toddler screeches like a banshee.

"Just plop him down somewhere," Linda says as she waves her hand around the room. "Hey can play with anything he wants."

Blaise make a noise like the click of his tongue and when I look at him, he has his eyes narrowed.

"He'll be fine," Linda notices our hesitation. "The twins will crash any second anyways."

Blaise hesitates a second before setting Ethan on his feet. "Alright, buddy," he says as I help Ethan out of his coat and hat. "We'll be right down stairs," he reassures him, messing up his hair and handing him his back pack full of toys. "It won't be very long. Okay?"

Ethan nods his head, sending a shy look to Peter and Paul who are wrestling by one of the windows.

I kiss his head and follow drunk Linda back down the stairs to the party. We're the only people not dressed up as something ridiculous and I guess I should be embarrassed by that... but I'm not. I accept the drink given to me by a passing man dressed as a lobster and I down it quickly, leaving it on a nearby shelf that's full of precious moment statues.

"I'm going to go smoke," Blaise says, kissing my head and leaving me with drunk Linda as he disappears to the back of the house to get to the patio.

I get handed another drink by another animal and I'm thankful that I have something to hold.

"God, that man," Linda sighs as she watches Blaise leave and then she turns to me. "Cheers to being social!" she says as she clanks her drink with mine.

"Cheers," I repeat flatly, taking a sip and balking at the taste because it's far too fruity and far too strong.

A part of me is pleased to be out of the house for a night, I suppose. I'm such a hermit I rarely leave unless necessary. Perhaps it would be good to go out of my box every once in a while.

My feelings are always so conflicted on these kinds of matters.

"Listen, I am really glad that you came," she slurs, putting her hand on my arm. "I really think you and I could be great friends." She pulls out her cell phone that was hidden somewhere in her cleavage. "Here. I want to take a picture with you."

"No..."

She presses her head towards mine and angles the phone away. I can see us on her screen. She's smiling a big plastic grin while I look slightly miserable to be alive.

_Oh, Ginny... You didn't smile... _

"Smile, Ginny," she says and I blink a couple times before giving in and giving my own fake smile with my head knocked against hers. She taps the button and the flash blinds me for a moment. I blink it away as she looks it over picture with her lips pursed. "Ugh, that one was awful. I have a double chin. We're taking another."

_We're taking another one... Smile this time... _

"Just one more," she says to my sour face. "Now, just tilt your chin up. There you go..."

We take ten more before she's satisfied.

I did learn that the best way to take a picture with another female was to have the camera angled above your head and you should always suck in your cheeks while you smile... which seems painful and ridiculous, but whatever...

"What are you doing now?" I ask as she starts clicking things on her phone that I can't see.

"I'm posting them," she says like I was stupid and I furrow my brows.

"On the internet?"

I realize it sounded stupid when I said it and I was rewarded with a silly look from Linda.

"Could you not do that?" I ask softly as I crane my neck to watch her do it anyways. I know that it's dangerous to have my picture out there for anyone to see. After all, part of being in hiding is actually hiding and the internet can bring all of those hidden things to light.

"Only my friends will see. Look." She presses her phone into my face to show me the cropped photo we just took. There's a caption underneath that reads: B_est neighbor ever_.

A lie if there ever was one...

"This is going to be my profile picture," she nods her head like I would care as she clicks more things. "My boobs look amazing..." She looks up when someone says her name and smiles."Oh, here's Cara," she says, waving her hand to catch the attention of a woman dressed like a slutty police officer. When she approaches, Linda puts her hand on my back. "Cara, this is my friend Ginny. Ginny, this is Cara."

I shake her hand, feeling silly to be meeting someone who's dressed like that. She's younger than Linda... Around my age...

"Cara, I think your son in in the same class as Ginny's boy... Ethan," Linda says as I take another sip from my glass.

"Ethan Crow?" Cara asks with her brow raised.

Crow... a name we picked when we came to the states. Although Ethan knows we're truly Zabini's it's a lie we tell to further protect our identity. _Another lie we make our son repeat_... I sigh...A private tutor is looking better and better.

"Your son is the hissy boy?" Cara asks and I frown.

"Hissy boy?" I repeat.

"The one who hisses at the snake all day," she says and then she narrows her eyes, putting a hand on her hip and cocking her head. "You know, your son gave my boy a scare last week. Jacob said that Ethan cornered him at recess and told him he was a wizard who was going to burn him up. Your son has anger issues," she says and I tighten my jaw. "I think he might need to see someone for it because this isn't the first time he's done something like that to Jacob."

"Maybe he wouldn't have anger issues if your son didn't call him hissy boy," I state, blinking in anger when she tilts her head.

I walk away before she can answer and I go towards the stairs, leaning against the bannister and drinking the rest of my beverage in one large gulp. I regret dragging my family here and I look up the stairs into the darkness..._ Poor Ethan_... After a few moments by myself, Blaise finds me. He smells of smoke and he tastes like cigarettes when he kisses me.

"I think I'm over this already," he says, tugging a hand through his hair and glancing up the stairs. "A man just puked beside me..." I crinkle my nose at that and then hide a smile at the look of utter disgust on his face. "I feel kind of bad leaving Ethan up there by himself. I know how miserable I am... I can't even imagine how he's doing in that madhouse," he admits, giving me a look that lets me know how serious he is. "Those kids are fucking nuts and I'm pretty sure that nanny is going to kill them one day. I'm going to take him home."

He bounds up the stairs before I can even reply and a second later he comes down with Ethan against his hip and his bag of toys slung over his shoulder.

"I'll come with you," I say, leaning forward to kiss Ethan's cheek for the millionth time as Blaise awkwardly helps him into his jacket.

I walk with them to the door as I push Ethan's hat on his head. He looks really tired and I give him a sad smile when someone calls my name. I look over my shoulder to find Linda running towards me on those crazy high heeled shoes.

"Ginny, where on earth are you going? I know you possibly can't be leaving now." She's just standing there in that stupid angel costume, looking disappointed. "I know Cara is a bitch-"

"Ethan is tired. I think we're just going to call it a night."

"Oh, but you can't," she whines as she tugs on my arm. "I've got so much fun lined up."

I look at Blaise and he shakes his head. "I'm going," he says, leaning forward to kiss my head. Linda takes a picture and I give her a glare. "You can stay if you want."

I don't want. He knows I don't want.

"Just for a little bit longer," Linda cuts in when she sees my hesitation. "There's a really fun game we're going to play and I really want you to be here for it," Linda pulls on my hand and Blaise gives her one more look before walking out the door.

I look at Linda before calling to Blaise. He stops on the porch and they both look at me with matching looks of irritation. Maybe... Maybe I should stay for a little while. I only have a handful of women who are my friends... No... That's a lie. I have one friend and her name is Linda and I barely know her.

"I'll be home in a little bit," I say and Linda claps her hands together.

I watch them walk away with Ethan's chin resting on Blaise's shoulder. He waves to me before the door closes and Linda pulls me back into the party. I just stand beside her and listen to her ramble on while Cara throws shade at me from the other side of the room. I was half tempted to take out my wand and hex her for being such a bitch, but I reeled myself in and decided not to abuse my power. Because that's what I had. Power. Where she was just a muggle with a glaring problem, I was more than capable to curse her face off and then make the others believe it never happened.

But I like to think I'm better than all that.

The fun game Linda was so proud of turned out to be a raunchy version of charades that I didn't bother participating. I drank a few more glasses of the awful fruity tasting atrocity before calling it a night. I ignored Linda when she tried to pull me back this time and didn't make eye contact as I left her house.

It didn't hit me until I was out in the cold that I was a little bit buzzed from the alcohol and the walk home felt like a ten mile hike uphill. I fumble opening the door, bringing down the wards awkwardly with my wand. I kick off my heels and lock the door behind me, pausing a moment because my head is spinning. After a few moments, I right myself and climb the stairs with my face red and my thoughts overlapping. I check on Ethan first. He's asleep in his bed and I run my fingers down his smooth cheek for a moment, smiling at how much I love him before leaving his room with the door closed behind me.

Blaise is still awake when I find him, reading a magical newspaper that he folds over when he sees me walk in.

"How was it?" he asks as he checks the clock. "You weren't gone long."

I make an odd noise as I peel out of my clothes and he sits up to watch me.

"Are you drunk?" he asks with amusement.

"Just a little bit warm," I admit.

Once down to my blouse and panties, I climb on the bed and start crawling towards him. He's shirtless, just in a pair of red boxers, and I feel like he deserves a reward for being so perfect.

"What are you doing?" he asks with a brow raised as I push him back and then I start lowering the waist band of his boxers.

I smile before kissing him and then I move down his body because, if one thing does merit oral sex, I think it's being a good father. I know his body well.. I know this part of his body_ very_ well... and I take my time teasing him into frustration before finally giving in and using my whole mouth. Blaise thoroughly enjoys himself, of course, but he stops me before I can finish. I tilt my head in confusion when he pulls me up and has me rest on his lap.

"I don't mind," I tell him, thinking that's why he pulled me away, but he just smiles and tugs at my blouse, pulling it over my head and throwing it on the ground in a heap of white ruffled silk.

I rub his shoulders and press my nose to his hair when he starts kissing my neck, unhooking my bra with his nimble fingers and letting the straps slide down my arms until it joins the other discarded clothes on the floor. He used my shampoo this morning and I smile a little as his kisses turn to love bites and his hips thrust up to find purchase in my clothed sex. He flips us in frustration and I gasp at the quick movement, laughing as I pull him to me so I can kiss him while his those clever fingers of his work to take off my panties. When those get thrown on the ground, he gets to his his knees so I'm caged underneath his lean body with his hands on either side of my head and his hips between my open legs.

He looks me over, studying my face and then moving down my naked body with his eyes lidded and lustful.

"Open, and willing, and waiting," his says, his voice deep and thoughtful. "Sometimes I thought I would never have you like this."

"Well, you do," I tell him, not able to come up with anything witty or sexy because I'm no good at either.

"I do," he says as he pushes my legs open a little more so he can rest between them with his sex pressing against mine.

I look down and watch as he adjusts his hips to sink into me and I smile a little when he presses all the way in with his jaw clenched. It's funny seeing his body so close to mine... He's so much darker...so much tanner than I will ever be. I'm so pale, I'm almost blue in color, but his skin is golden and it looks so drastically different next to mine... I feel like my skin _glows _next to his.

I wrap my hand around his arm when he starts moving and I keep looking down where his body is joined with mine, wondering if he notices too.

"Ginny. Ginny. Ginny..." he says as he thrusts into me, his voice sing song and light with amusement. "Can I?" he asks, suddenly serious as his golden eyes look into mine. He tilts his head and presses a kiss to the corner of my lips like he wanted to convince me.

I know what he wants and I pull back to look into his eyes for a few long moments before nodding my head. He smirks and stops moving to grab his wand from the side table. I move my hair away and tilt my face to the left as he puts his wand against my neck.

"Not too deep," I warn him.

He went too deep last time and I thought I was going to pass out.

He nods and then whispers the spell. I wince, but the pain doesn't really bother me anymore so I push it away as Blaise throws his wand to the side. He bends down to lick the blood from the cut his magic had made and I worry my lower lip between my teeth, arching my back at the sensation. I know my blood has magical properties because of the family I was born from and that was one of the reasons we had to leave England. People wanted to use it for darker purposes, but Blaise... mostly it just gets him high and every once in a while I let him because I love him and when I drink his right afterwords it makes me high too.

He pulls back after drinking his fill. There's some blood on his lips and his eyes are dark as he stares at me with his teeth coated red. He grabs my knees and yanks me down before plunging into me with a growl in his throat. The roughness of his love making takes me by surprise and I hold onto him as he lifts me up so we're both sitting on the bed, facing each other as I lower myself into his lap. I'm starting to sweat and I press my face into shoulder, riding out the tremors in my body before a wildness over takes me and I bite his neck.

I bite him hard... and he makes a noise when I draw blood.

I pull him painfully close and he throws me back against the pillows, mounting me again as his blood dribbles down my chin. After a few seconds, I feel the blood go to my head and, mixed with the alcohol, it's a lethal combination. I'm not very nice to Blaise for the rest of the night because of it. I push him, and scratch him, and slam him against different surfaces in our room. He's so lost in the blood lust that he hardly notices because he pushes right back... with slams, and smacks, and bites that leave painful marks to be regretted later.

We end up by the window, on the floor, pushing against each other in something that could no longer be considered love making... It was fucking. Straight and animalistic fucking that was no where near being romantic or loving, but take me to hell if it didn't feel insanely good in all it's awfulness. I grab the curtains and yank them down when he turns me around again and he kisses me hard, his mouth biting at mine and his tongue twisting until I can barely breathe.

It wasn't until he punished me with another bruising kiss that I realized I had called him Draco again and I made a weird whimpering noise at the sensation. He gripped my hips a little too hard as he spilled his release inside of me with a cuss so filthy coming from his scratchy throat.

"If you call me that fucking name again, I'm going to make you regret it," he says darkly, grabbing my chin as he pulls out of me and forcing me to look into his eyes. "Do you get that?" he snaps. When I smile, he pushes my chin away and glares at me. "You think this is funny?" he asks harshly, his voice bitter and full of hate. "You get enjoyment out of hurting me?"

I can't help it... I start laughing.

I laugh and I laugh and I laugh as I fall back against the carpet with my arms stretched above my head. He doesn't appreciate my humor, of course, and he give me a disgusted look before stomping to the bathroom. He slams the door, making a few framed photos on the dresser fall over and smack to the ground. I don't care for his tantrum and I refuse to go after him to apologize. I muffle another laugh with my hand before pulling myself to my feet and turning to the window.

I'm impossibly hot now, so I pry the window open and let the chilly October air hit my body that's now full of marks and bruises and blood... Sweat dries on my skin as I stare out at our backyard, barely visible in the moon light. It's made up of endless green grass with a play set and pool covered for the coming winter..._An upper middle class suburb at it's finest... _

My body aches from all that twisting and turning, and I bring my hand down to run between my thighs, feeling the wetness that's left over and smiling a little to myself in satisfaction. I only pull back when Blaise exists the bathroom... the harsh light filling the dark room with a brightness that hurts my eyes. He pulls his pack of cigarettes from the hidden spot in his dresser and I raise an eyebrow as he puts one in his mouth and lights it with the end of his wand.

"How would you like it if I kept calling you another woman's name?" he asks, turning the bathroom light off and approaching me with his fists curled in anger. He's still undressed and I take a moment to look down his body before catching his eyes again.

"I wouldn't like that at all," I admit as I let him pull me to him with a yank. I hit his chest hard and he puts his hand on the small of my back to keep me there, his cigarette a dot of red burning light in the darkness. "I'd probably kill you."

He smirks then. It's an ugly smirk that's unpleasant and cruel, but I don't react... I just stare him down as he blows smoke out of the side of his mouth.

"Should I kill you, then?" he asks coldly, his lip curling up in a sneer.

"I don't think so," I say, running my fingers down his warm arm until I get to his right hand...Where I pluck the cigarette from his fingers. He glares at me some more as I snuff it out on the windowsill.

He_ knows_ he's not allowed to smoke inside.

"No?" he asks, grabbing my wrists and staring me down with means to intimidate, but I won't break so easily. I flick the cigarette out of the window with a little smirk.

"No," I say as I crawl on the bed and then I look at him over my shoulder. "If you kill me, who's going to be left to have your beautiful babies?"

His anger melts immediately as he crawls behind me and I smirk when he runs his hands up my spine.

"Is that a yes?" he asks, his voice soft and hopeful like he had never been angry in the first place. He wraps his hand around my hair and tilts my head back to look at him when I don't answer quick enough.

"It's a yes," I say with a smug smile, pleased that I can dangle that power over him.

He flips me around again and he rests on top of me, pushing damp hair away from my face and kissing me sweetly.

"I'll stop taking the potion. Maybe we'll have a redhead this time," I say hopefully and he laughs. It's a deep chuckle that shakes his chest

"You're all recessive genes," he says, tugging on some of my hair. I scratch his back in response and his spine arches. "Mine will trump yours every time. I'm sorry, but all of our babies are going to be dark haired and tan."

"Ethan is pale like me," I point out and something in his eyes change... something that turns back to anger and I tilt my head curiously when I notice it. "You don't win the genetic lottery every time, I'm afraid," I joke, but he doesn't return my smile. "I can always change my mind, Blaise," I remind him. "So stop looking me like that if this is what you want," I warn.

He looks like he's going to yell at me for a moment before he shakes his head, like he thought better of it. He pulls me up after that and turns me so I'm on my hands in knees again.

"If there's one thing I never thought I'd be," he starts as he lines his body up with mine again. I smirk when I feel his arousal against my sex and I grab the covers in anticipation. "It was being completely pussy whipped by Ginny Weasley," he says before sinking into me with a hard thrust.

I laugh and rest on my forearms, riding out another rough session well into the night.

After today's events all lined up in my mind, I realize something with a smug smirk of my own. Finally, after so many years together... I have actually managed to domesticate the notorious Blaise Zabini.

* * *

I wake well before dawn and I take a moment to stare at Blaise as he slumbers beside me. His features cut a sharp outline in the darkness and I turn on the side to look at him more closely in the waning moonlight. There's no doubt that he's beautiful, more beautiful than me, actually... but there's a manliness to him... a hardness that cuts to the core with a glare of his golden eyes.

I bring my hand up to touch his face... He stays clean shaven now-a-days but when we first moved here, he grew a full beard and mustache. He had it for a good year and a half before shaving it all off because he didn't like the way it felt. It added an element of realness to his perfection and it made him look like... like a _man_.

I kind of wish he'd grow it all back.

He makes a noise in his sleep before turning around and tucking a hand under the pillow. Blaise is not a cuddler and I smile a little at that. He has a few freckles on his shoulder and I lean forward to kiss them, pulling him close and sighing thoughtfully as I reach out to touch his hand, running my fingers over his palm. I rest my head against his and throw a leg over his thigh. How much would change if we had a baby? I let that thought wonder off with a furrowed brow and then I start thinking of Ethan.

What would he think of the whole thing? Would he be pleased to be an older brother or would he absolutely hate it?

Blaise tries to shrug me off after a while and I nearly laugh at the noise of irritation he makes before slinking off of him so he can sleep peacefully. I debate whether I want to go back to bed... but I decide against it and I stand up, stretching out every which way before going towards the bathroom. I flinch when I turn on the light and it takes a moment for my eyes to adjust before I catch my reflection in the mirror.

I look pretty frightening, actually... like someone who just survived a horror movie.

I take a shower to scrub off all the dried blood and I wash my hair with the same shampoo that Blaise always steals. I just stand underneath the shower head for a while, letting the warm water run down my head and back as I think of everything and nothing at all. My mind plays tricks on me sometimes. It shows me things that can't possibly be real... memories that never happened, voices that I've never heard... a man that I've never slept with. I let my hand trail down my stomach and in between my thighs when I think of that man, his image blurred and unfocused but his voice as sharp as a whip.

I'm glad fantasies don't count as cheating, because I've been having an affair with these thoughts in my mind ever since Blaise and I came to Virginia. Sometimes I feel guilty about it, but then I realize how silly that is. After all, one can't have an affair with ones own hand and I'm sure Blaise has his own thoughts that don't involve me all the time. When I'm finished, I step out of the steaming shower and use a wand to heal all of the marks left on my body. I'm too damn old to have love bites and I don't feel like dodging questions about what happened if other people see them.

I dress quietly in a simple blue tunic and comfortable cotton over stretchy black leggings. I forgo putting on a bra because it's Saturday and, honestly, fuck bras. I slip on a pair of slippers and I glance at Blaise still sound asleep in bed before carefully leaving the bedroom and closing the door behind me. Between Ethan and Blaise, it is very rare that I find time where I am completely by myself and I try to take advantage of the situation anytime it actually presents itself. I tip toe away from the bedroom to the spare room at the end of the hall where the windows face the street.

It's _my_ room.

After all, it was Virginia Woolf who said a woman must have money and a room of her own if she is to write fiction... and this room is all mine and the money I make from the stories I write is all my own as well. Though it really isn't much...The magazines that buy them hardly pay me well... but I could still survive if I wasn't with Blaise. I could make a home for me and Ethan and live comfortably with-in my means.

Or...I like to think so, anyways.

I go inside and lock the door behind me, staring at the computer outlined in the darkness before turning it on with a glance out the window. The moon is still out and the stars are still blazing... a street lamp is out on the corner and a cat runs down the sidewalk after knocking over a trash can...

When the computer is fired up, I sit down at the desk and type in my password before stretching out and I pull up the story I've been working on for the better part of three years. I'm almost finished with it, but the final chapter eludes me... so does the title. I can never think of a proper name to call this _thing_ I've spent so much of my time perfecting.

I don't even know if it's good.

It's just a series of stories that pop into my mind and I felt compelled to write them down after a while. A part of me doesn't even want to share it with anyone else. It's mine... Just mine and I don't know if other people will even like it... A part of me doesn't even care if they do...It's a twisted story where the characters never choose the right path and where darkness always seems to win.

I fear it will not have a happy ending... and people love happy endings.

I start typing, the keys clicking under my finger tips... I keep writing, reading, changing... writing, reading... changing... editing... writing... changing... looking up... changing... writing... waiting for an idea to come...What does this word really mean? I look it up and then use it in a sentence... writing... rewriting... stopping... getting a drink... writing... go to the bathroom... reading... erasing... saving... writing... A title...A title. A title. A title...

_Envy... _

I type the word out and then stare at it as it jumps out at me from the screen.

_Manipulations... _

I stare at the two words together, relating them to my characters and their situations.

_Envy & Manipulations_

I didn't realize how long I was just staring at those two words until I heard some birds chirping outside followed by the cold gray color of day breaking through the window. I shake my head and rub my eyes out when I realize they're burning something awful and I sit back, yawning into my hand and scratching my head as I stare at the computer screen some more.

_Envy & Manipulations _

"Envy and Manipulations," I say out loud just to taste it and I let the words roll around in my mouth for a while before I hear a set of small feet creaking down the hallway. A few moments later, the same little feet knock against my door and I smile before picking up my wand and unlocking the door with a simple spell.

"Come in," I say softly and Ethan steps inside, looking all sleepy eyed with red cheeks and messy hair.

"What are you doing awake?" I ask softly. He walks towards me and crawls on my lap, shrugging his little shoulders and not bothering with a real answer as he makes himself comfortable against me. I snuggle him close and press my lips to his hair with a long sigh. I love him in the mornings... he's all soft and sweet and warm. "It's pretty early, my love."

He doesn't say anything, he just yawns and nuzzles his head against me like a kitten.

"Did you have another dream?" I ask curiously, holding up his hand and looking at his little fingers.

He nods.

"What was it about?" I ask a I press his palm to my lips.

"The burning tree," he whispers tiredly.

I know this dream of his. A tree with white bark stands at the center of a dark forest and suddenly it bursts into flames... Flames that dance with green fire that threaten to burn the whole world up... I know it well because I have it too.

"Did anything else happen this time?" I ask softly, gently rocking him back and forth as I rest his hand on my neck.

"Not really," he mumbles, his eyes drooping shut.

I squeeze his arm because he's so soft, but I pause when I notice a little red spot on his forearm. "What is this?" I ask, bringing it close so I can see and kissing it when he shrugs. "Another bug bite?" I ask and he nods sleepily. "I think they just like you because you're so sweet."

He chuckles a little before opening his eyes and glancing at the computer screen. "Can you tell me a story?" he asks, turning in my lap so he's facing the computer and he puts his hand on the mouse like he was going to take matters into his own hands.

"What story do you want?" I ask, placing my chin on top of his head and putting my hand over his to click through the folders.

"The one about the boy and the crow," he says softly.

I find the story I had written when he was just three years old and I clear my throat before starting.

"There once was a boy who lived in a small village called Thorpe," I say, smiling a little when he whispers the words with me. "This boy lived with his mother in a little shack on the outskirts of a dark forest. This forest was home to many sinister creatures and no one from the village would dare go near it, but this particular boy was very brave."

"Every day the boy would enter the forest using a book of spells his father had given him to bypass all the creatures who tried to harm him. He did this so he could fish from a magical pond that rested at the heart of the woods. The fish were plentiful and the boy would always catch enough to feed his family and use the rest to sell to the other villagers in Thorpe. One day, when the boy was resting by the pond, a crow landed in front him and looked at him with it's beady eyes."

"'_Hello, there,'_ The crow said as it stretched out it's wings. '_What are you reading?_"

"A book about magic," Ethan says the line and I smile again, kissing the side of his head.

"_What kind of magic?_' the crow asked."

"All kinds," Ethan whispers.

"_Who would give a young boy such a dangerous thing?_' the crow asked, hopping on a nearby rock and looking curiously at the boy with a tilted head."

"Books aren't dangerous," Ethan whispers. I'm pretty sure he knows it by heart now.

"_Ah,'_ the crow said. '_Books are sharper than any sword, mightier than any wand..._."

"Gin?"

I blink and then look over my shoulder. Blaise is there, rubbing sleep from his eyes and glaring at me.

"What are you guys doing up so early?"

"What are _you _doing up so early?" I counter.

It really isn't strange that Ethan and I are awake at this hour. We have awful sleeping habits, but Blaise usually sleeps later than most teenagers on the weekends.

"I have to go in," he says, walking into the room and kissing my head. "It appears like there's some sort of crisis," he says with an eye roll as he presses his lips to Ethan's cheek.

"On a Saturday?" I ask with a frown.

"On a Saturday," he confirms, putting his hands on the back of the chair and staring at the computer screen for a moment before shaking his head. "It should only take me a few hours."

"I'll make you something to eat while you get ready," I say as I stand up, shifting Ethan so I can carry him. He's almost too big to be carried like this... but I don't mind the extra weight just to keep him close. "We'll finish the story later," I whisper into his ear and he nods with a sigh of disappointment as I take us down the stairs.

I set my Ethan down at the table when we get into the kitchen and run my hands through his dark hair, musing at the redness I can see come out just barely when the sun shines on it.

"What should we have for breakfast?" I ask softly, a dull ache in my head letting me know that the alcohol I had last night was going to punish me today.

"Cereal," he answers, as he answers every morning.

"Are you sure?" I ask with a brow raised. "I can make some eggs and bacon. Or maybe some biscuits with gravy. Waffles? Pancakes? French toast? It's Saturday... anything is possible," I tell him with a smile.

"Just cereal," he says flatly, not even bothering to think about all the fattening possibilities.

"Alright. Cereal it is." I grab his favorite and pour it in a bowl, adding milk until he tells me to stop and then placing it in front of him. I give him a glass of orange juice and a bowl of cut up bananas before getting myself a large glass of water to drink greedily. Hydration is a beautiful thing. "What should we do today?" I ask, stifling a yawn. Perhaps I'll take a nap when Blaise gets back. "Maybe we can go to the park if it's not too cold out. Would you like that?"

He nods his head in response and I start pulling things out of the fridge to make breakfast for Blaise. He eats healthier than I do... so I make him egg whites with peppers and some whole wheat toast on the side. I have no desire to eat healthy, so I make my eggs like God intended them with the yoke over easy and some toast with a good amount of butter on top. Blaise is throwing on his potions robe as he walks into the room and I smile tiredly at him.

"Just in time," I tell him as I set his plate down a the head of the table. I pour him a glass of orange juice and smirk when he kisses my temple. "What time do you have to be there?"

He glances at his watch and sits down, picking up the fork and shoveling the food into his mouth like a mountain man. "I've got about ten minutes."

"Did they say what the crisis was?" I ask curiously as I sit down and pick up my fork. When I notice he has a bite mark on his neck, a little bit of bestial pleasure warms me before I shake it off and take out my wand to fix it.

Like I said, we're too old to have love bites... Especially ones that resemble _actual _bites that had every intention to cause pain and draw blood.

I stand beside his chair and start healing him as I pull down his collar. He doesn't even bother to stop eating or ask me what I'm doing... that's how often this happens.

"Something about a horrible smell coming from one of the rooms," he says with a wave of his hand around a mouthful of toast. "When something starts smelling like fire they call me in," he says, winking at Ethan and making him smile. "Your father is an important man."

"Very important," I confirm, leaning down to wrap my arms around his shoulders when I'm finished healing. I press my face into his neck for a moment before sighing and pulling back, but he grabs my hands to keep me in place.

"Is it still a yes?" he asks, his voice soft and barely audible as Ethan eats his breakfast. He tilts his face to catch my reaction with his dark brows furrowed in a line. "Or was that you just being drunk?"

"It's still a yes," I assure him with a smile as I press a kiss to his lips. When I pull back he's smiling that charming smile of his. "We'll talk more when you get home, yeah?" I ask and he nods his head, smiling even wider like I had just given him the greatest news a man could ever receive.

When it's time for him to leave, he kisses Ethan's head and bends down to kiss my cheek.

"When I come home, I'll fill you up again," he whispers against my ear. I blush at his words before pushing him away and watching him leave out the garage door.

"I'm done now," Ethan says, showing me his empty bowl. "Can I watch cartoons?"

"Of course," I give him a tired smile and walk him into the living where I turn on the television.

I lay down on the couch and Ethan lays on my back, his little body warm against mine as I adjust the pillow underneath my head. This is a morning routine of ours. Where we lay about and watch cartoons on the television before really starting our day. I close my eyes and yawn as he shifts on top of me and he yawns as well.

"I'm tired," he says and I nod my head.

"I am too."

I almost fall asleep that way until someone starts banging on the door. Ethan and I both jump up and he looks frightened as the door shakes.

"Ginny!" That's Linda's voice and I grab my wand. "Are you home!?"

"Stay here," I say to Ethan as I run towards the front door.

"Linda?" I ask as I look out of one of the windows. She's standing on my porch in her pj's looking frantic with her twins by her side and the toddler against her hip. "What?" I whisper before putting down the wards so I can let her in. When I open the door, she runs by me with her kids close behind looking scared. "What are you doing?" I ask as I close the door and ward it again.

She goes into the living room where my Ethan is sitting on the couch with a pillow cradled to his chest. She picks up the remote and starts clicking through channels.

"It's all over the news," she says and I look at the television where they're showing coverage of various monuments and buildings around Washington D.C...They're completely demolished and up in flames. The Jefferson Memorial... the Washington Monument... the White House... "Do you think it's terrorists?" Linda asks as she walks towards the screen with her hands shaking. "Look!" she shouts as she points to the footage taken on someone's cell phone."Did you see that black spot? It's like they're flying and look!" she shouts again and the children jump. "Did you see that colorful thing... It hit that statue and blew the whole thing up!

"Mama?" Ethan is worried now and I pull him to me, holding him against my hip as we watch the destruction of America's capitol.

"It has to be the Taliban," Linda says as Ethan shakes against my side. "I know it is!"

"It's not the Taliban," I whisper when I realize what the black spot is... It's a person in a billowing cloak riding on a broom... and the colorful thing Linda pointed out was a curse... a curse that came from a wand.

These were witches and wizards.

A news anchor, who looks pale and shaken, comes on the next and she's gripping a piece of paper in white knuckled hands. Linda is clicking things on her phone, no doubt posting about the attack while her children shake in fear.

"What you're watching is video taken by a civilian just moments ago showing the attack on Washington D.C. by people unknown at this time. We're hearing reports that other major cities across Europe are being targeted by this group as well... Moscow, London, Beijing, Madrid..."

"Is this real?" Ethan asks, his little face frowning. We've told him there's difference between what happens on television and what happens in real life... but this _was _real... and I didn't have the heart to say it.

"….The president has issued a level red alert for the entire country," the news anchor says. "and they're urging people in the surrounding states of Virginia and Maryland to stay indoors and call 9-1-1 if they see any suspicious activity. Most roads in the capitol have been closed..."

A loud bang shakes the entire house and Linda looks at me before we both run towards the front window.

"Oh, my God!" she screams when we see the robed creatures on brooms zoom past, shooting curses at the surrounding houses. "The terrorists are here!"

"It will be alright," I reassure her, trying to keep my voice calm and leveled. "Let's go in the basement," Nothing can happen to this house. We have good wards," I say and Linda doesn't understand, but she nods anyways. I think of Blaise and I swallow hard before shaking out of it. "I have flashlights and blankets in the hall closet. Let's grab those and then go downstairs. Grab some water and snacks from the kitchen as well. There's a basket in the closet where we can put everything in the pantry."

She nods again and blindly follows my commands, handing off the supplies to her children who are looking just as shocked as she is. "I don't have any reception any more," she says after a moment and I glance at her as she pulls her cell phone from her pocket. "I tried to text Murry, but look," she shows me her phone. "It won't go through. Do you have reception?"

I check my own phone and shake my head. It's hard getting reception in here anyways because of all the magic... but I'm sure most of it is because of what's happening outside. Ethan is staring out of the window now and watching as the neighborhood gets destroyed by colorful curses.

"Get away from the window," I tell him sharply, my fear making my voice harsher than I intended.

"They've got Mrs. Melling."

"What?" I ask as I rush over and pull him away, only to see our old neighbor being twisted around in her front yard by a pinch faced witch with a mane of bright red hair. Mrs. Melling starts screaming... screaming something terrible and it stirs something in my chest. "Linda," I call and she looks up from her flashlights and blankets, all pale faced and duck lipped. "Take Ethan and go in the basement."

I push him off on her and take out my wand...

"What are you doing!?" she shouts as I open the door and step out.

I slam it behind me and put up a double ward when I see how many cloaks there really are flying around our neighborhood. There have to be two dozen of them... I manage to catch one mid flight as he zooms past our porch, sending the brute tumbling to the ground and smacking against the cement of my neighbor's driveway. When I'm sure he won't get up, I turn my attention to the redhead who's torturing my neighbor.

Mrs. Melling's body is twisting in sickening ways and my stomach curls as I lift my wand, shooting a well aimed curse that hits the witch right in the head. The redhead falls back and lands against the ground a few yards away, but Mrs. Melling doesn't stop screaming.

I sprint towards her and shoot curses at the people on brooms flying over head when they notice me.

"Mrs. Melling?" I say when I get close enough and I kneel beside her, dodging another curse that get's thrown right at me. It scorches the ground beside us and I send up a shield to buy myself some time."Debbie," I say her first name to get her attention and I shake her arm because she keeps screaming with her eyes rolling in the back of her head.

She's wearing silk pj's of pink and white stripes and she's bleeding at the mouth with her frizzy hair loose and wild about her head.

"It's me," I shout, grabbing her face and forcing her to look at me. "Your neighbor. Ginny. I'm going to help you, but you have to stand up." I say and after a few painful moments, she nods her head and helps me pull her to her feet. Her ankle is broken. I can see it as soon as she tries to put pressure on it and she howls in pain as it cracks beneath her. "I can heal you if we can get inside," I tell her and she blinks a few times, her pudgy face screwed up in pain. "But we have to hurry and it's going to be painful." She nods like she understands and I lift my wand. "I have to lower the shield for us to move, so we have to run fast. Don't look up..."

She leans all of her weight on me and I nearly buckle under her girth. She's a large woman in the shape of a ball, but my adrenaline is pumping and I feel a lot stronger than I actually am. I start dragging her towards my house and she screams bloody murder when a curse whizzes past us, just missing and singing off some of her crazy hair.

"It will be okay," I reassure her because she's crying and mumbling things to herself under her breath about how this must be a nightmare and how she wishes she could wake up.

Two wizards in black robes try to stop us, but I shoot them away with a red curse that makes them yell in pain and fall from the air, landing on the ground in heap of broken bones and groans. We start walking again, but a wizard lands before us, making me stumble back and causing Mrs. Melling to fall hard on the ground. She howls again as the wizard pushes back his hood and smiles when he sees me.

He's younger, with dark hair and wide set eyes.

"It's you," he says as he takes a step towards me with his eyes wide and cheerful like his little group didn't just declare war on all muggles. "You have been gone for a very long time. We've been looking," he says, messing with some dials on his watch. "We've all been looking. He's going to be so pleased."

"Who will be pleased?" I ask, but he doesn't get a chance to answer because Mrs. Melling pulls herself up, grabs the man's discarded broom, and starts beating him about the head with it.

I raise my brows as she hits him to the ground and his wand rolls away. The others take note of his beating by broom and they come zooming towards us, so I put up a shield and I grab Mrs. Melling's thick arm so I can drag her to the house. When we get inside, I actually smile for a second when I think of the wizard who was beaten by a broom wielding muggle, but when Mrs. Melling speaks... her voice is full of venom.

"You're one of them," she says accusingly and I look at her in surprise. "You're one of those things!" she shouts as she leans against the wall with her broken ankle off the ground.

"One of those things just saved your life," I say harshly, warding the door again and then turning towards her. "Let's get to the basement. I'll heal you down there."

She pulls away from me violently. "I want none of your witchcraft!" she hisses, clutching the cross necklace she wears with a trembling lower lip.

I give her a look, my eyes narrowed and my fists clenched.

"Think of me what you will," I tell her flatly. "But I'm the only one who stopped that woman from killing you in the most painful way. If you don't want to be helped, that's fine. I can push you back outside-"

"No," she says quickly and I know I was being cruel but I had no patience for her dramatics. "No.. Thank you," she says reluctantly. "I'm just shocked... is all..."

I nod, a short nod of understanding before I grab her arm. "To the basement," I order as she limps beside me. When we get to the stairs, I use my wand to turn them down so they resemble a slide. Mrs. Melling says something awful again, so I force her to sit and I push her down because I have no time to walk to through all this magic business with a bitter old woman.

We have a finished basement with a television and a few couches that Linda and her children are sitting on as they watch the news together. I help Mrs. Melling over to one of the lounge chairs and I lift her broken ankle to rest on an ottoman...Then I realize my Ethan isn't down here.

"Where is he?" I ask, giving Linda an awful look as her hands shake. "Where is Ethan?"

Linda looks at the ceiling and I follow her gaze. "You let him upstairs by himself?" I say in a panic, dropping Mrs. Melling's broken ankle with out much grace and she howls in pain when it makes contact with the foot rest. "What is wrong with you?" I hiss as I run towards the stairs.

I use magic to turn them right again and everyone starts screaming when the electricity goes out, leaving the basement in pitch black darkness.

"Use the flashlights," I chastise as I light the end of my wand.

I hear a few fumbles and then two of them power on. I don't even bother to give them more direction as I run up the stairs to find Ethan.

What if he went outside?

The thought makes my heart speed and I search for him frantically with my voice high pitched and strange as I call his name. The black cloaks are flying about our house now, passing windows and peering inside as I run up the stairs.

"Ethan!" I scream, throwing open each door with my wand white knuckled in my right hand. I have an insane anger taking over my chest towards Linda. If anything happens to Ethan I'm holding her personally responsible. "Ethan!"

I hear something fall on the top level of the house and I tilt my chin up... When I hear the noise again, I take off running up the attic stairs, sighing in relief when I see Ethan. He's standing on a chair by our only magical fire place, desperately turning the knob on the mantle.

"Ethan?" I run towards him to pull him into a tight hug. "You scared me. I thought you had gone outside."

"It's not working," he says, tears in his eyes as he turns the floo line knob again. "See. There's no fire. I was going to call Daddy... but it's not working..."

"I'm sure your father is fine," I lie.

I hear more screams outside... More screams and slams and gunfire and noises of destruction. We live in a family neighborhood. Almost everyone has kids here and I look down at Ethan, cupping his face and kissing his forehead.

"I need you to go back to the basement with Linda and the others," I tell him, glancing towards the circular window. "I have to go back outside."

"Why?" he asks, his lower lip trembling like he knew how dangerous it is... but how could he? He's just a boy.

"Because someone has to help," I tell him seriously. "And not many people around here know magic."

"I can go with you."

"No," I say sharply. I pull him from the chair and rest him on his feet. "You're too young," I whisper to soften the blow of my harsh voice. "You have to wait here for your father to come home."

I take his hand and start pulling him down the stairs. We're almost to the basement when we hear a pop of Aparation coming from the kitchen. Ethan's eyes light up in hope before he starts sprinting towards the garage door.

"Ethan, stop," I shout and he pauses, but only for a moment

"Wait for the knock..." he whispers and he holds his breath for a moment before it comes.

_Tap. Tap... Tap. Tap. Tap... Tap. Tap. _

_Blaise. _

I sigh in relief and he takes off running again. I follow after him, telling him to slow down and wait for me, but he doesn't listen and a part of me can't blame him. I want Blaise too, but when there's a situation as dire like this, there are more security questions to be asked, more lines to be drawn before an outsider can come in. Of course, Ethan only knows the knock and I try to catch up with him as he slides into the kitchen and runs towards the door that leads to the un-warded garage.

"Ethan, wait before-"

He opens the door before I can stop him and I stop dead in my tracks.

It's not Blaise who's waiting for us on the other side.

I inhale sharply at the stranger, not liking the way he's looking at my son with his head titled so curiously to the side. I run towards Ethan, yanking him back by the shirt and pushing him behind me as I stare at the man on the other side of the threshold. He has white blond hair cut short and parted down the side and he's dressed in a fine three piece suit of black with a cape lined in forest green silk.

His features are sharp, cut like glass and unyielding, with cold gray eyes that are staring me down with an intensity that makes me uncomfortable. He's looking at me like he knows me... Like he's seen me before... Like I have wronged him in some way and this was his vengeance for it all.

"Ginevra," The way he says my name sends a chill down my spine and I back up, pushing Ethan as I go. "It has been a long time."

_That voice_. I_ know_ that voice and it sends a pulse between my legs. Why is it so familiar?

"What do you want?" I ask, my wand hand shaking... but I'm not afraid to use it. I will kill him before I let him harm my Ethan. He looks at the wand I have pointed at him before giving me an unpleasant smirk and stepping into the kitchen with black dress shoes so impeccably shined.

"Is it not obvious?" he asks calmly, his head tilted and smirking that unpleasant smirk again. I push Ethan back and clench the wand. "It took me a very long time to find you..."

_You have been gone for a very long time...We've been looking..._

"You want my blood," I interrupt him and he raises an eyebrow.

"No," he says, tilting his head again. "It's been over five years. I come for much more than that," he says flatly, taking another step towards me with a hand in the pocket of his dress trousers. "I've come to reclaim what is mine."

"I don't know what you're talking about," I tell him. "Leave us alone," I add for good measure and he hesitates a second before storming towards me, pulling a wand from his pocket and deflecting the curse I try to throw at him. Ethan yells in fear and hides under the kitchen table when the man grabs my arm.

I glare up at him and swallow hard when he glares right back. His features are oddly angular, like someone had broken glass and rearranged it to form a face with sharp points and smooth planes. He's handsome... but not in the way that my Blaise is handsome. He was harder, sharper... not as inviting or as warm, but there was a similar darkness in his expression that was lurking just below the surface. The same expression that my husband would get from time to time...

The look of a killer.

I blink hard when he clenches his hand around my upper arm, tightening his fingers and making my skin burn. Under all the darkness, there was a _cleanness_ to him...everything about him was so impeccably put together in a very specific way. His hair, his clothes... even his shiny wing tip shoes were all thought out and just so perfect. Nothing was just thrown together last minute or improvised... I could just imagine what he was like at home...Everything in it's place...

He was a perfect monster.

"Is this a joke?" he asks sharply after studying my face so hard I thought he meant to melt it with his eyes burning like molten silver. "Do you not know who I am?"

"Should I?" I ask with a brow arched, matching his look of disdain.

I must have hurt his pride because he clenches his hand around my arm so tightly I nearly make a noise.

"Yes," he says flatly, his jaw twitching in anger. "You should." he pauses for a second then he wets his lower lip. "I am your husband," he says and I furrow my brows. I would have scoffed had my position not been so awful. "That boy," he continues, nodding to the table where Ethan is hiding. I can only see his little toes and his hand wrapped tightly around one of the legs. "Is my son."

_Son_...I feel myself poison at the word and my heart starts thumping so loud I can hear it in my ears.

"That is_ not t_rue," I tell him with my eyes narrowed as I try to tug my arm away from his firm grasp. "You're mad."

The way he's looking at me... He looks almost sorry before he shakes off that emotion and he furrows his brows.

"Call me mad all you like. I've come to claim what is rightfully mine and bring you home once and for all."

_Home_... That word and the way he says it... I shake my head. I'm a witch. Why in the hell am I just standing here? I press my wand into his stomach and he looks down. A smile threatens to break on his face before he grabs my wrist.

"You will not hurt me," he says as he digs his fingers into my skin. "You _know_ me, Gin," he says, his voice hard and deep. "You know me."

_Gin_... the way he says it...

"Draco." A voice breaks our staring match and I look at the woman standing in the garage way door. She's petite with dark hair cut short and around her shoulders is the same black cloak with green lining the man is wearing. "The wards are broken. Do you want us to follow through?"

"Draco..." I repeat the name and he looks at me quickly... watching me blink through it as I try to piece together how I know the name.

"Take the boy," he orders and that snaps me back to reality. I fight against him, a curse hitting his hip and making him hiss. I take the distraction to grab his wand and I press it to his throat.

He looks amused again and a piece of hair falls across his brow as I press my wand to his adam's apple, breaking his well kept image... but somehow making him look even more perfect.

_Why am I even thinking that?_

"Don't touch me," I warn, shaking away the disgust of my own thoughts.

"Put the wand down, Ginny," the girl says and when I glance at her again... my heart stops.

She has Ethan.

"It doesn't have to be like this," she says with her wand along Ethan's throat. He looks so frighted right now and when he tries to pull away, she grips him tighter.

"No," the man says as he glares down at me. "This is exactly how it has to be," he says before reaching out and grabbing my wrist again. "You're not going to hurt me," he says sharply. "Not only because Pansy has our son, but deep down you know you don't want to."

Our son? Those words were disgusting to me. How do they even know me? How can they speak my name with so much familiarity while breaking into my home and saying such nasty lies? I don't know them. I don't know this man... How could I forget someone who looked as cold as he did? How could I forget this history he seems to think we have? And that woman... That woman is just looking at me like I was the most pathetic thing she's ever seen.

"You will not hurt me," he repeats gently, his voice soft like a lover's and it makes me sick.

How wrong could one man be? Of course I wanted to hurt him... but when Ethan calls to me again, his little voice calling a strangled _mommy_...I feel something in me break. I let the man take the wands and Ethan is finally let go with my submission. He comes running towards me, tripping in his haste and falling hard his on top of the unforgiving kitchen tile. His lower lips trembles as I dash towards him, ignoring the other adults as I pull him to his feet. The look on his face... he's so scared and he falls against me, wrapping his arms tightly around my neck. His little body feels as light and breakable as a birds, so I lift him, holding him like a toddler again as he trembles.

"It's okay," I lie as I kiss his ear. "Don't be frightened."

"When is Daddy going to come home?" he whispers and the man makes a noise.

His eyes... he looks murderous for a second and he turns to the dark haired witch like he was going say something nasty... but he stops himself when his gaze shifts slightly over her right shoulder. I watch his jaw tick as he walks towards our refrigerator where he takes a moment to stare at all of the things hanging on the door with silly magnets we had collected over the years. It's a mess of our life together... Full of pictures and programs and progress reports from Ethan's school. There are drawings in crayon and printed out recipes littered around a calender full of events with important dates marked with red ink.

To be honest, it's embarrassingly messy and I have no idea what he could possibly be looking for.

"Malfoy," the woman says softly, like she was treading lightly around his thoughts as he glared at our refrigerator door.

I hear the front door open and more footsteps file into our home. Ethan presses his face to my neck as the cloaks invade, opening doors and stomping up stairs... The blond man doesn't look away from the refrigerator... he just keeps staring at it. Then, after a long while, he reaches out with a gloved hand to pluck one of the pictures from the door.

It's a family picture taken over the summer at the Strawberry Festival. Ethan had just gotten off of a ride with Blaise and I was set to take their picture, but a woman had walked by and offered to take it so I could be in it as well. It was rare that we were all in a photo together. Ethan dominated most of our films, but every once in a while there would be one of me... or a random one of Blaise. It was kind of nice to have a memory where all of us were present outside of a studio setting.

"What are you doing?" I ask, not even realizing I had said anything until the witch looked at me, her dark brows furrowed with worry.

"What do you care?" he asks coldly, his voice sounding like a petulant child as he studies the picture with his silver eyes narrowed.

I don't want him to do anything to that photo. It's important to me. Even though I was sunburned because I was too busy slathering Ethan down with sunscreen to worry about myself and even though Blaise had an awful stain on his white t-shirt because I had accidentally flicked chocolate ice-cream at him... it was still one of the better photo's we had of our family and I didn't like the way he was gripping it so tightly.

"It's very lived in here, isn't it?" he says to no one in particular and the witch... she looks very concerned as she watches him tilt his head. "Very average and _domestic_. I didn't think he had it in him," he whispers, more to himself than to us and then he licks his teeth. "But Zabini has always been full of surprises."

"You know Blaise?" I ask stupidly and the look he gives me... It pierces my heart.

"Better than you do," he replies darkly.

I put my hand on Ethan's back and furrow my brows at the way he's glaring at me. There's something boiling under all of his anger, something far away and almost sad... but I can't rightly put my finger on the emotion I see and it's gone as soon as it came... getting buried under his ire as he clenches his fist. He opens his mouth like he wants to say something, but he stops when one of the black cloaks walks into the room. He's a younger man with a cleft lip and he just stands there until the man acknowledges him.

"Since you are standing here alone, I can assume you did not find him?" he bites sharply. The cleft lip nods a short nod of disappointment. "Of course not," he says shortly and then he looks at me, his eyes blazing in a silver flame reflecting the sun. "Do you know where he is?" he asks and when I don't answer he smiles unpleasantly. "Of course, you won't answer that even if you did."

He wants to say something else, something awful... but he decides against it and then he starts tearing the picture up... ripping it into pieces and letting it fall like confetti to the floor. Ethan holds on to me so tightly it actually hurts and I look towards the garage door that's still open behind him, contemplating making a run for it.

The stranger notices that the other cloak is still standing with us in the kitchen and he blinks in irritation. "Why are you still here?"

"There are muggles in the basement," cleft lip confirms after a short pause

That one sentence made my heart drop and I look away from the open door.

I had forgotten all about them and I look at the stranger, his cold eyes narrowed his his lip curled up in a sneer.

"Correct the house." he says before grabbing my arm.

"What does that mean?" I ask as I watch black cloaks file into the house and make their way to the basement. "What are they doing?"

I think of Linda and her children in the basement with Mrs. Melling and I swallow hard.

"No," I snap as the man starts pulling me towards the garage door. I try to yank back, so the stranger stares me down, his jaw ticking in anger. "What are you going to do to them?"

"Are those muggles your friends?" he asks, tilting his head when I hear Mrs. Melling's screams.

I nod my head, hiking Ethan up against my hip.

"Good," he says nastily before pulling on me again.

"There are children down there," I say as I rip away from him, only to run into the dark haired girl who's standing way too close behind me. "Don't hurt them."

"You think I would?" the man asks with his chin tilted down.

I don't have an answer for that and I step away as the dark haired girl saddles herself beside the stranger.

A loud noise shakes the walls and Ethan gasps loudly, burying his head in my neck again. I bring my hand up to his hair, trying to sooth him with little words of encouragement whispered in his ear. When I hear more screams, I look over my shoulder to see a group of black cloaks passing by the archway with my neighbors being dragged behind them with bags over their heads. Ethan sees it, and he clenches his fists against my tunic, bunching up the fabric in his sweaty little fingers.

I can't do this anymore. I am a witch, this is my home, those are my friends, and this is my son that's being traumatized.

I close my eyes to collect myself before freeing my right hand. The stranger doesn't even expect it... a little wandless magic can go a long way and I drop Ethan... Lifting my hand and getting the stranger in the gut with a quick spell that blazes in a shock of bright blue magic. It hits him hard and he flies back against the refrigerator, taking the dark haired girl with him as they slam oddly against the wall. Their wands go flying and I scramble to find mine under the wreckage... clenching it with my fist and then grabbing another to push at Ethan.

"Come on," I say as I grab his hand and start running towards the door.

I shoot curses at black cloaks who try to stop us and we make it halfway down the road before I lift Ethan again, holding him against my hip because he's moving way too slow. I whip my head around to see more black cloak's taking over the neighborhood like roaches with their cloaks and magic and fire. I don't see Linda, her children, or Mrs. Melling. All the muggles seem to be gone now and I look around frantically for a few moments before I lift my wand and attempt to Apparate us away.

….but it doesn't work.

There must be some kind of block set up and I start sprinting down the sidewalk, my slippers not protecting my feet from the hard ground that bites underneath. I run as hard and as fast as I can, but I'm not seventeen anymore... I'm not as in shape as I used to be and Ethan seems to be getting heavier with each turn. Wandless magic always drains me and I'm trying so hard to fight back against the cloaks that I can't possibly run anymore without falling over. I throw up one last concealment charm so Ethan and I can duck in someone's backyard to seek shelter under one of their awnings, hidden from view by stacks of chopped fire wood.

I set Ethan on his feet and lean against the house to catch my breath. My poor boy is trembling and that stranger's wand looks so out of place in his small hand.

"Do you remember that stinging curse your father taught you?" I ask, putting my hand on my side to rub out the stitch there. I look at my Ethan when he doesn't answer right away. His hair is a mess and his eyes are wet with tears, but he's trying not to cry. I kneel down in front of him so we're eye level, my knees pressing into the soft earth. "I want you to use that if you see anyone you don't know coming towards you," I tell him softly, pushing hair away from his face. "Do you think you can do that?"

He nods his head, his bottom lip trembling as he looks down... When I realize he's barefoot, I feel guilty for making him run."Where is Dad?" he asks, his voice sounding so young and hopeless. He glances at me again, his dark eyes shining against the light. "Why are those people here? Why are they after us?"

"I don't know," I admit softly, feeling guilty that I can't do more for him. "But it will be alright," I reassure him with a little smile that feels so forced. "We'll just—"

I stop short when I hear foot steps and I crouch down even more.

"Daddy."

"No," I say sharply, tugging Ethan back when Blaise comes into view.

He looks worse for the wear with some blood at the corner of his lip and the sleeve of his right arm in tatters. His golden eyes have that dead look in them he gets every time he's angry and he glances at his watch, tapping it a few times before turning and looking right at us. His eyes soften the slightest bit and he holds out his hand with a relieved sigh.

"Thank God," he says as he pulls me to my feet. I'm skeptical for half a second until he gives me this look... This completely _Blaise_ look that could belong to no other. "Can you fucking believe this?" he asks, kissing me hard before bending down and picking up Ethan. "Are you alright?" He pulls back like he just realized he should ask, his wand hand squeezing Ethan's bare foot as he looks him over. "You're not hurt?"

"No," I answer for the both of us as I reach out to touch Ethan's back. "Who are these people? They came to the house..."

"How did they break our wards?" he asks, his voice suddenly incredibly serious and his golden eyes narrowed. "We put them up ourselves."

"They didn't have to try very hard," I admit, blinking a few times as I remember the stranger with his sharp features that were very nearly handsome had the situation been different. "Ethan opened the garage door..."

"I thought it was you," Ethan admits, his voice sounding guilty. I kiss his head so he doesn't feel bad. "The man did the knock and everything."

"A man? What man?" he asks sharply, his voice now angry in it's intensity. "What man, Ginny?"

"It was some blond guy," I admit and something in his face changes... that dead look comes back. "The woman called him Draco."

_Draco..._ The name rings through my mind, waking up memories so deep I can hardly see them rise.

"He knew you," I add, furrowing my brows. "He claimed to know all of us." I open my mouth to tell him of the troubling and _awful_ things the man had said...about me and Ethan and what he thought he was to us... but Blaise takes my hand instead.

"Come on," he says as he starts dragging me away. "There will be more men coming. They put up a ward so we can't Apparate out, but if we get far enough- away we can get out of here. I know of a place we'll be safe."

We run and run and run... with curses flying overhead like fireworks. I can see other men and women in midnight blue robes like the one's Blaise wears to work, fighting against the black cloaks...but I don't have time to question it because I can see the end of the wards they set up. It burns yellow against the ground and the air shimmers lightly, like a wall made of magical bricks to keep us in. Just before we reach the end of the blockade, a pillar of smoke passes from above and lands with a cement cracking_ thud _against the street right in front of us.

Once the smoke clears, the blond man emerges looking even worse than Blaise does.

Some of his hair is matted with dark red blood and there's an open cut on his forehead that's dripping blood down his face. When he looks at me, my heart thumps and I swallow hard because his gray eyes are blazing with a betrayal I could never understand.

"Ah, Malfoy," Blaise starts, his voice light and mocking. I narrow my eyes when he turns to hand me Ethan because he sounds familiar with the stranger. "Come to visit after all these years? That was a nice trick with the smoke, by the way," he says, stepping back as I cradle Ethan's head. "But I guess it is in your blood-"

The blond shoots a curse meant to hit Blaise in the chest, but Blaise is able to deflect it... causing it to shoot off to the right where I'm standing with Ethan. It grazes my arm and I shout as I fall back, landing hard on my backside and trying to make it so I don't drop Ethan, but he's hurt anyways... hurt and frightened and he starts crying loudly...All the emotions he had been bottling up during this nightmare come to the surface as he sobs against me with his face in the crook of my neck as he lets the wand he's been holding on to clatter to the ground.

The men start fighting as I scramble to get us out of the way. Colorful curses go flying back and forth in a wizard's duel that is violent and beyond respect with the unforgiviables they were trying to hit each other with. Blaise got hit in the arm and then in the shoulder and in return he hit the stranger with an awful curse that got him in the leg. It made him drop to his knees for a moment with blood pooling on the asphalt underneath him before his rage took over and he stood up, charging Blaise and shooting curse after curse with a deadly persistence that was almost scary to watch.

Blaise was able to hold his own, though, and he fought back with just as much determination. While the stranger handled himself with a calculating skill, Blaise was like a butcher, his wand work choppy and out of practice...It made sense somehow. The way they were fighting... fitting for the men that they were.

_You don't even know him_... I chastise myself and I shake away memories that my body had no business having.

I should do something... I should help... but with Ethan so frightened and refusing to let me go I know I can't... The best I can do is get him away from the carnage and I look at the shimmering ward just a few yards away. _It's so close_... I glance at Blaise, waiting for him to notice me... to see what I intend to do... but he's too focused on the stranger to even notice.

He would want Ethan out of harms way.

I know that for sure.

I make a quick decision and start running towards the barrier, but Ethan starts screaming and I turn around just in time to see Blaise fall. His head smacking against the pavement and his wand rolling from slack fingers.

_No._

I put Ethan down and level my wand at the blond with every intention of killing him... But my wand hand hesitates and it gives him just enough time to look over his shoulder and see what I intend to do

"Of course," he snaps, lowering his wand as he wipes blood from his face. "This isn't exactly the reunion I had envisioned, but somehow I find it completely fitting."

"Is he dead?" I ask, my voice a strangled whisper as I glance at Blaise's body.

"Not yet." The strangers voice is bitter and then his sharp eyes look to Ethan who has gone stone still by my side. "You've always had one major flaw, Ginny," he says, his voice taking a softer tone. "You've always hesitated at the worst possible moments."

Something hits the back of my neck and I gasp, bringing my hand up to cover the spot and pulling back to find blood on my fingers.

"What?" I whisper, trying to grab onto Ethan, but my fingers are numb and my vision starts to blur as black cloaks surround us, swarming like flies.

The stranger comes towards me... _Draco_ comes towards me... and he plucks the wand from my fingers before brushing hair away from my face. I don't even put up a fight, my head feels so fuzzy.

"You've grown up so beautifully," he says gently, his voice sweet like it was in a dream.

_I think we could be great together..._. His voice feels like velvet... His _voice_... f_eels_ like velvet? God, what did they hit me with?

I blink to stay focused and then I hear a cuss when a spell shoots from my side. _Ethan_. He used the stinging curse his father had taught him and when Draco jumps back,Ethan grabs my arm, desperately calling to me in my haze. _Mom, please... Mommy, you're bleeding..._There's a commotion and a fight ensues, but I can't focus on anything but my own overlapping thoughts that are dark and full of steam.

_Get him... Don't let him go..._

My movements are sluggish and my reactions are slow... I don't even blink when a spell shoots from the right and hits Ethan in his little chest. It makes a cracking noise and Ethan makes an awful sound before falling to the ground. I come to long enough to catch him and I stare, blinking furiously as I try to come out of my daze.

"Goddamnit," Draco says, hitting the curse thrower with an awful spell that makes her scream. "You can not hit children with curses that strong."

"Is he dead?" I ask, my voice detached and hardly feeling anything as I stare down at Ethan. _You are going to feel this, Ginny_... the voice in my head taunts.._. It's going to hit you like a tidal wave..._

"Of course not," Draco snaps, his voice turning sharp again as he bends down to lift Ethan from my arms. "He's mine," he says, like it explained everything and he pulls me up with a yank.

I grab his arm when I stumble and he stares me down before bringing his hand up to run his thumb over my chin, passing over my lower lip and pulling it down for one second before letting it pop into place with a his brows furrowed.

"I know this is hard for you to understand right now," he starts, his brow raised. "You loved me once," he says, with Ethan passed out against his chest. "You will remember that in time."

He steps back then, and nods to one of the cloaks.

"Put the bracelets on her," he says as someone approaches me from the side. "She's going to pass out."

I don't fight it. I let a baby faced man put two golden hoops around my wrists and when he cinches them with magic to fit snugly, I smirk because it feels funny.

"Magic," I say and the baby faced man shakes his head.

"No magic," he says. "Not for you, anyways."

_Not for you... _

I close my eyes for a moment and think of magic inside and all around.

_No magic... _The inner voice whispers..._Not yet. _

Another cloak takes my arm to steer me towards an Apparation zone and I watch the back of Draco Malfoy as he carries my Ethan.

_You loved me once..._

I twitch, rubbing out my right eye with the palm of my shackled hand.

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

I think of a harsh kiss with music blaring loud in the background. It was a demanding kiss that hurt and nearly drew blood when sharp teeth bit down on my lower lip.

_You have your rules, I have mine. _

A tug of hair a few sharp words... a jumbled mind of a drunken girl.

_I'm not a child..._

"Draco."

He stops and looks at me over his shoulder just in front of the shimmering ward with a brow arched in surprise.

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

_You loved me once. _

"What?" he asks shortly when I don't respond right away and I blink slowly, feeling the darkness take me.

"It was just dancing..." I say with a furrowed brow. He gives the man beside him a concerned look before coming towards me with Ethan dangling like a doll in his arms.

"What?"

"It was just fun..." I whisper and he now looks worried.

_It wasn't fun for me...I would appreciate it if you wouldn't do it again._

"It's not like we're official," I reply to the voices in my head.

"She's delirious," one of them say and I look to Ethan, dead asleep in his thermal pj's.

_You're delirious... You're mad... You loved me once... Do you remember?_

Those words aren't mine... They aren't his either and I blink a few times.

_Do you remember?_

"I remember," I whisper, but it wasn't the blond I was talking to because I wasn't in my little Virginia neighborhood anymore.

Gone were the black cloaks and the blond named Draco Malfoy who was holding my son... It all fades away until I'm standing in a field surrounded by black hills that rise from the earth like stone giants against an overcast sky. There are dark clouds rolling in from the west and my dress is swirling around me in a flurry of golden silk brocade and red velvet.

"I've always liked you in red," the man says with a sardonic smile.

He stands a foot taller than me, decked out in all black with the house sigil of two dragons intertwined on his chest plate. He's a big man, a strong man, with gray-green eyes and brown hair just brushing his cheek bones.

"I imagine I'd like you in red too," I respond, a sly smile of my own.

"You already know," he starts with a smirk, a beard two days grown on his tired face. "I don't wear red."

"You will," I answer, smiling sweetly in the way that he likes.

He's clever enough to detect the threat behind all the honey in my voice and he shifts uncomfortably for a moment because he knows... He knows that I know what he has done and I will never forgive him for it. He's serious now, more serious than he has ever been before.

"Did you expect a different outcome?" he asks, his voice bitter and dark. "You dishonored me, you dishonored my family... you dishonored yourself."

"No," I say gently, tilting my chin down when the wind picks up, sending my hair blowing behind me in wild waves of red. "It was Merek who dishonored me," I tell him, my voice light and playful as I watch his eyes darken. "Many... _Many_... times. In fact, he dishonored me so often it is a wonder I can even walk properly."

I nearly giggle in pleasure at the jealousy that flares in his eyes. How easy it is to provoke a temperamental man.

"You were promised to me," he says, his voice a strangled calm of an irate killer.

"I made no such promise."

"Your father-"

"My father has no right to promise me to anyone." I cut him off, for a moment my emotions getting the better of me because it was such a sore subject. I take a moment to collect myself, smoothing down my skirt and smiling again. "Especially not to someone like you."

"Someone like me?" He questions sharply. "And what am I?"

_What am I?_

I look at his long sword and that freshly used wand he murdered my Merek in cold blood with.

"Weak," I answer after a short pause, looking at him and blinking. "So very weak."

The rage was back, a torrent of emotions behind his gray-green eyes.

"You gave up your honor to a lowborn half blood," he says with intent to hurt and humiliate. "What does that make you?"

"I gave him more than my honor," I tease with my brows up as he gives me a disgusted look. "I suspect that makes me something _vile._"

_Smile with vile wiles, child..._

"He gave up some things too," he snaps, his right hand on the hilt of his shining sword. "His head, for instance. He gave that up rather easily. You should have seen the magic he was throwing at me. Pathetic sparks with a silly twig...and he begged. Oh, how he begged for his life before I was through."

I don't reply to that, I just stare at him. He's nearly heaving now, his eyes wild and his face red with barely concealed emotions of anger and pain... and something else I refuse to identify because he doesn't deserve to have it. He watches me closely, his eyes dancing over me like he was waiting for something... _anything._. to show how he had affected me.

Time passes slowly as the wind swirls around us until finally I find it in me to speak.

"Do you expect me to cry?" I ask because I would never give him the satisfaction of seeing my grief. "Or shall I throw myself on the ground and tear out my hair like a proper lady?"

"Perhaps you should think about throwing yourself at my feet and begging for mercy," he says as he takes out his wand.

I would laugh if the situation wasn't so very serious. I'm sure Lancaster wouldn't appreciate it.

"I'm not one for begging," I tell him. "Or mercy," I add and then I hesitate a second before taking a step closer, my slippered feet light against the the hard ground. "But I wouldn't be against watching you beg on your knees."

He grabs my arm at that and yanks me close.

Like all rage filled men, he uses his size to intimidate and when his grip becomes iron tight, I don't even bat an eyelash.

I've had my share of brutes.

"You're hurting my arm," I say flatly, watching his lip curl up in a sneer. He was handsome, Lancaster of house Malfoy. He could have been much more than he allowed himself to be.

"Do you have any idea what you do to people?" he asks, shaking me violently and wanting me to bear witness to his rant. "Why are you like this?" he snaps, pushing me away until I stumble and fall on the ground. "You play with people. You twist their emotions and push them into doing things . Awful things... and you don't even care."

I stare up at him. He wants something from me... He would have tried to kill me if he didn't care. But he does... He _still _does and I know the best way to a brutish man's heart. My lower lip starts to tremble, my eyes begin to water, and I use the oldest womanly trick in history.

I start crying.

"Stop it," he hisses at me as grabs my arm again to pull me to my feet. "Stop crying."

"I don't know why I am the way I am," I say through thick tears and snot. "But you didn't have to kill him!"

"Everyone knows you ran off with him and it's known you're promised to me," he says, his voice changing to something much more softer. "I had no choice."

Wonderful logic.

"I know," I whisper, staring at his throat with tear blurred eyes.

I look down and start sobbing, my shoulders shaking as I try to wipe away tears. I lean into him, and after a few moments of hesitation, he loosens his grip on my arm. Instead of grabbing me, he was holding me. I hide away a smile as I bury my face into his chest because above all his anger and resentment, Lancaster Malfoy wanted nothing more than for me to love him.

Because he was weak in the way that most men are weak.

"Did you really love him that much?" he asks, his voice softer than before. "You hardly knew him."

I shrug and wipe away more pathetic tears. He hooks his fingers under my chin to tilt my chin up until I'm looking into his eyes.

"You loved me once," he says, his voice soft and with out anger. "Do you remember?"

"I remember," I say, letting my eyes trail down to his lips.

He has a full lower lip and for a moment I try to remember the way he tastes...

"It was_ him,_ wasn't it?" He says, willing to put the blame on anything and anyone to make my betrayal of his fragile feelings not his fault...or mine... because like all warriors he still wants to be a conqueror... and everyone knows you can only conquer a woman with love. "He's been putting those thoughts into your mind again."

I think of Edmund. The way he walks and talks in my dreams...

"Yes."

"I will kill him."

"You can't kill what's already dead," I say softly, my voice dream like and far away because I was already dead too, he just didn't know it yet.

He starts looking at me like he used to, long before I decided I wanted nothing to do with him.

"Did you really lay with him?" he asks, his voice half full of heartache.

"No," I lie because it's what he wants to hear. If he only knew how many man I've had... he would probably fall on his own sword. "I shouldn't have even said that. I was just angry."

He wants to believe me so badly he's willing to accept any lie...It's like all my worth, and all his love, depended on whether or not I would spread my legs for a man not assigned to me by people I never even liked. I was reminded, not for the first time, how pathetic the male sex could be and when he kisses me as an answer, I nearly smirk in victory because Lancaster didn't know it—but I was warrior too. Only my game was much more deadlier than his.

"We will tell everyone that the half-blood bewitched you," he says when he pulls back, running his nose over mine and pressing another quick kiss to the corner of my mouth with a hand tangled in my hair. "My father will accept that answer because he wants peace with your family."

"And what of us?" I ask.

"We will find a way."

_Yes, we will. _

"Do you remember last summer?" I ask softly, my voice barely above a whisper. I smile at the thought. "The first time you kissed me..." He smiles a little too, it's not unpleasant. "Let's go back there," I say, taking his hand and intertwining our fingers. "Back to the cavern."

The cavern.

The cave.

The most perfect place in the the entire world.

He's pleased to follow me... Thinking that I will give him something he feels he deserves. There's a cavern under the hills that runs deep into the earth where a small pond of the clearest blue water rests undisturbed. Stairs had been etched into the earth long ago and I start running into the darkness with my wand igniting ancient torches to light our way. Lancaster grabs me before we reach our destination and pulls me into a another fiery kiss, completely lost in a dream as my laughs echos off of the high ceilings.

"Just think," he says, playing with my hair with a handsome smile. "This could all be ours once we're married. All the fighting will stop when we have children."

_Men are so stupid._

"Wouldn't it be nice," I say softly as I back up and start untying the front of my dress as he watches me with darkened eyes. "I have a gift for you."

_And that gift will never be children. _

"Do you?" he asks with a smile, thinking I mean to offer him my body.

"Look at the water," I say and he smirks before doing as I ask and turning towards the water that glows unnaturally bright in the darkness. "No peeking."

I pull out my wand and with a spell, the bodies come floating to the surface of the pond. It takes a moment for Lancaster to see them, and when he does, I smile.

"What..."

He recognizes one of the bodies... a head of fine blond hair tied in green ribbons laying face first in the water... He wades into pond to turn over the bloated mess, a feral yell leaving his throat as he looks upon his dead little sister. Only six with gray-green eyes and a slit throat looking so very pale...

Then he notices the others.

A dozen of his family members surround him, turning the blue water red with their blood.

"You don't seem to be enjoying my gift," I say, savoring that look on his face when he finally turns to me with hopeless, glassy eyes very near tears. "Did you think really think I would be okay with you murdering my lover just because you were feeling slighted? I thought you knew me better than that."

_No one knows me at all._

He doesn't have words left and I laugh a little before turning around to leave him in the cave to be miserable in the shock before the magic wears off. Right before I reach the stairs, I hear him coming for me with stomps of his hard boots like thunder against the cave floor. I turn around to taunt him more, but he was closer than I had realized and his long sword went right through my gut.

I don't feel anything at first and I start laughing when the blood gurgles up my throat.

"You're mad," he says as I laugh and laugh and laugh. "You're delirious."

_You loved me once._

"It was just fun..." I whisper with a crooked smile. "They begged," I say around another laugh as I grab the hilt of his sword to push it in further. "Oh, how _they_ begged for their lives before I was through."

In a fit of anger and despair, Lancaster pulls the the sword from my body and then he starts hacking at me like an unskilled butcher.

"You loved me once!" I mock his pathetic words with each swing of his sword. "You loved me one. You loved me once. You loved me once. You loved me once. You loved me once. You loved me once."

I laugh the entire time as he slashes at my skin, tearing off my arm, and hacking through my ribcage, breaking bones and tearing muscle, until finally his anger brings him to the place where he can take my head from my shoulders with ease, leaving a good chunk of my red hair stuck to the blood on his messy blade.

He's always had such an awful temper.

_You loved me once... _the words were echoing in the cave all around us and getting inside his simple little head... _You loved me once..._.

When his blood lust was sated, he was near mad with grief as he turned back to the pool where his dead family was... and suddenly he realized why I was laughing so hard. The bodies disappeared with my dying magic and he looked so forlorn to know that it was just a trick... just a bit of fun... and I had gotten him good.

My blood ran from his long sword and down on to the cavern floor as glittering eyes watched from the shadows. He let out a deafening wail before falling to his knees with my body behind him, completely sliced apart and in pieces.

_You loved me once... Do you remember? _

It was funny because it was the greatest revenge I could ever get on him. Because Lancaster was a big dumb animal. A big, dumb,_ jealous _animal that had more feelings than a man his size should and absolutely no impulse control.

The glittering eyes in the darkness watch as Lancaster panics and stumble from the cave...tripping over my remains and getting sick over his violence. I would laugh if I could, but I can't, so I don't and the eyes watch as I look over myself, strewn about the cavern floor in bloody pieces...and suddenly a story pops into my mind, a little tale sung to me as a child on my mother's lap.

"_What are you reading?" _

"_A book about magic." _

"_What kind of magic?"_

"_All kinds," answered the boy._

"_Who would give a young boy such a dangerous thing?"_

"_Books aren't dangerous," the boy replied with a frown._

"_Ah," the crow said. "Books are sharper than any sword, mightier than any wand, and greater than any man. In fact, the wrong book can corrupt even the purest mind if given half the chance."_

"_What if one was corrupted already?" the boy asked and the crow tilted it's head. "What damage could a book do then?" _

_The crow had no answer and the boy removed the wand from his pocket, sending a deadly curse right at the bird's chest. The boy watched with shining red eyes as the crow fell on it's back with it's wings outstretched against the grass. He smiled as he stood and picked the creature up by it's feet with the magic book tucked under his arm as he made his way back home. _

_The boy knew books themselves weren't dangerous. Books were like food, made to be devoured by a hungry public willing to read them to satisfy their appetite. The pen was much mightier than the sword, for sure. The right words could send a whole nation to war, but they had to be strung together in the right way to sway the hearts of the people in one direction or the other. If a sword was nothing without a knight to swing it, than surly a pen was nothing without it's writer._

_The boy wondered, if a book was corrupt, then perhaps it could be likened to spoiled meat that people would pay to consume because they were hungry for it already... and if that was the case then the writer himself was the hunter and cook of such a dish so willingly eaten by the masses. Who was to blame, then? Surly it wasn't the books fault for it's content. After all, a book was nothing but paper and ink... but was it the patrons of such atrocity, or the chef that served them what they wanted that truly was at fault? _

_The boy wasn't sure._

_Later that night, as he sat at the table with his mother to eat the crow he had killed, surrounded by books he had read a million times over... he realized it didn't really matter what the answer was...writer, reader, content... He was in good company and the boy smiled at the thought because the boy named Edmund was corrupt already and books were just his tools to get where he wanted to go._

"_You loved me once," his mother said, worried to see such a smile on her son's face. "Do you remember?" _

"_No," The boy named Edmund replied with red eyes glowing. "I've never loved anything at all." _

_I've never loved anything at all._.. the darkness whispers before pulling me under.


End file.
